Don't Blame Me! - BAIW: Putting Your Daughter on Birth Control

Episode Date: April 4, 2024

But Am I Wrong: Melisa: DEI Is the new "n" word with a hard "r" Meghan: Writing is for women But Are You Wrong: Preventing a teenage pregnancy Going to church on Easter But Are They Wrong Melisa: Mario Perron Meghan: Men punching women in NYC Write In: [e-mail] Weigh In: vote in the weekly poll on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/by.meghan.and.melisa/ Buy Our Merch: https://store.dftba.com/collections/don-t-blame-me Join Our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/dontblameme Follow Us: https://www.instagram.com/meghanandmelisa https://vm.tiktok.com/TTPdYV7J5p/ Follow Meghan: https://www.instagram.com/meghanrienks/ https://twitter.com/meghanrienks https://www.youtube.com/c/meghanrienks Follow Melisa: https://www.instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa/ https://www.instagram.com/diamondmprintproductions https://twitter.com/SheIsNotMelissa Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

hey there hi there how do you do this is a new episode of a little podcast that we like to call but am i wrong and that is when we two people hi hello we do hot takes rants whatever we'll get there's three different segments we'll get to each one of them yep and and all you really need to know is you are a participant in this not just through your ears and like listening but we have so many opinions that we like to share and we also like to hear your opinions so while we might say that we rule with the sparkly glitter gavel of what we think is right, what we think is wrong. We welcome your input as well. Also, Patreon people, you're just now tuning in right now because I forgot to hit video, but you heard it. Yeah, it's OK. Sorry. And you'll on Patreon,

you'll also notice the sky going light and dark and changing. And that is what I call spring in los angeles the clouds have been so juicy i haven't gone outside enough to even notice i know you've been tilling away outdoors oh so here's another part of my delusional my delusions um how i truly believe that similarly to how if i could do math i would be a world-renowned engineer because like i love puzzles if it was not for my health i could be such a good construction worker because I love the tactile things of moving things. I love moving something to here. I love breaking things down.

I have so much drive that is not matched by the endurance my heart can take. But boy, oh boy, do I have the grit and do I have the emotional heart? I don't have the physical heart. I do have the emotional heart and I have the passion for it. What about getting stuck under a wheelbarrow?

And then I probably solved my way out of that one. By calling? yeah but I also got into a specific position where I was able to save save it and there's I would have been able to get it out if it was just me but I was trying to preserve my energy let's not do that again no that's what everyone kept saying that I did a little bit longer but then Maz hired people so then I actually can't do it great he's like let's like he's like at this point he's gonna like set me up in the living room like with a puzzle and be like stay here and it is on camera yep on video on wavelengths i said weeks ago because i didn't think either one of you

should have been out there no he was not well and i said please hire people and you said i just had so much fun i was like ripping things up i like i can't understand you could be out there assisting but you shouldn't be the main point person no you know you know you are right mods kept saying like i can delegate and i don't like delegating because i don't have the words i'm not good at explaining things like that like let me get out there put me in coach how about you not delegate you just say what can i help you and then they'll give you a task where they can send you off to be on your way and then if you get stuck under something someone will be out there to assist you well i learned my lesson i didn't get stuck again and also for me i've got

great form so like i'm sore in all the good places versus mods who was like walking around like he was like 95 years old and i said you didn't engage your core like me even i was just working out inside my home and i couldn't from wednesday to sunday i could not touch my own elbow doing this like if you're watching the video i have my my arm bent where i am holding my shoulder couldn't do that until i still worked out on monday it was still mildly sore and i couldn't move my arm all the way up but then i did a 30 minute stretch also on saturday i took an epsom bath and it's i was still pretty sore but it wasn't as sore as i'd been but i did a 30 minute stretch and that really did it there's a different level of pain that that gets you and i

was thinking about that when mots's legs were dying after we were doing this like workout when he was doing not workout when he was doing uh ripping up the stuff in the front yard and it was like oh this is like the perfect example of like the composition of bodies where it's like what as when we're so used to like we have bigger calves than men do anyways because like you're wearing heels we those muscles are built like that and then the arms like that the way that some of those muscles have never engaged because they don't need to engage because your core has to engage because you've got boobs and your back has to engage and all this stuff your arms don't have to work the same way that like when you work it out like that it's like something is horribly

wrong yes i am broken and sewn together in a little sack i was like am i ever gonna be okay no the first time until they have me twice i was like i actually can't work out my arms like that again like it was really scary i literally was like i'm gonna have to learn how to live like this like i could not see the end of it so i felt really bad but you put on a sports bra in like six minutes i thought was very impressive it was very painful yeah ow well anyways um yeah we'll get into each of the segments like melissa said before they start but just know that the fun part about this is your participation so we love to hear your opinions and we make votes on our instagram stories for each episode pertaining to all the different segments and then we ask you to vote

on who you think was wrong in each one and then tomorrow our friday episode but it won't be for this episode tomorrow before we have fisting friday where we where we read the results of last week's episode of but am i wrong and we also take all of your submissions so we love to hear when people respond to each story being like oh well i thought this or maybe this or this this this or whatever and then we read them all and sometimes there's even updates from like the original people who have written in or we'll have updates for like the newsy parts but it's a great time so vote along all right first segment it is but am i wrong that is when we pick something from our personal lives that we would like to rant about it doesn't necessarily have to be personal

it can be anything that has really ruffled our feathers we want to rant about or like something in our actual lives that we might have been wrong in or just thoughts and feelings that we're sharing so i have a hot take this week and it's very hot oh i love this you're writing i yeah i have no idea if i'm gonna agree or not i can't wait oh you'll agree and if you don't we have a problem yeah see ya di oh i i wonder what i'm gonna think di is the new n word with a hard r i literally just saw something about this again di is the new n word with a hard r so just so we can this is one of my ones that i've researched so it's going to be a little dissertation, if you will. If you're wondering what DEI is, it's an organizational framework

which seeks to promote the fairness and treatment and full participation of all people. And so groups of people have been historically underrepresented or subject to discrimination on the basis of identity or disability. The D in DEI stands for diversity, E stands for equity, and the I stands for inclusion. The roots for DEI were in the 1960s when anti-discrimination legislative movement, when the laws like Equal Pay Act of 1963, Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, and the Age Discrimination Employee Act of 1967, they all addressed labor issues that were based on protected classes. And then somewhere in the late 80s and 90s, people were like trying to stop discrimination and they were like, discrimination of people in certain groups

isn't enough. And the kind of ethos of those initiatives was to go beyond just avoiding discrimination and to actively change organizations so that they were more welcoming and being inclusive. So then we jumped to current-ish times a few years ago. In 2003, corporations spent $8 billion annually on diversity and then after the election of uh donald trump in 2016 and then uh hashtag me too and black lives matter movements and then time magazine stated in 2019 that the di industry now we're calling it an industry had exploded in size within academia in 2019 a survey found that spending on DEI efforts had increased 27 percent over the the five preceding academic years and then we get to 2020 and the estimated place and the size of global diversity

inclusion market was at 7.5 billion dollars and 3.4 billion of that was in the United States and they projected that by 2027 it would reach 17.2 billion dollars but that was before people started banning it yeah and so in 2021 new york magazine stated that the business became astronomically larger after the murder of george floyd in may 2020 and the economist has also stated that surveys of international companies indicated that the number of people hired for jobs with diversity, quote unquote, or inclusion, quote unquote, in the title had more than quadrupled since 2010. And so I want to take a moment to talk about the rise and fall of DEI. In the wake of George Floyd, I said on this podcast and amongst people that I know that think anything

that people were doing was real. I was like, why are people mad today when they should have always been mad and that they're doing this for smoke and mirrors it was all an act and it was people like not even actually caring it was performative activism and then someone told me they were like well we would be mad or if they weren't doing anything and i was like i wouldn't because i know this shit is fake like nothing about this is gonna be sustainable this is not an actual change People are just doing this because one, the pandemic was happening. And then two, people didn't have anything else to do. And they're like, this looks like the right thing I should be doing.

So let's do it. According to the Chronicle of Higher Education Institutes, they're making an argument that there's a lot of like criticism. Some schools are removing the word diversity from titles of offices and jobs. Some are closing campus spaces that are set up for students according to identity. some are ending diversity training and some have stopped asking all faculty and staff for written affirmations of their commitment to diversity insane and these people know what words mean yep and then as of 2024 affirmative action rhetoric has been increasingly replaced by

emphasis on diversity equity and inclusion and nine states have explicitly banned its use in the employment process. The Supreme Court in 2023 explicitly rejected the affirmative action regarding race in college admissions in the student fair admissions versus Harvard. The court held that affirmative action programs lack sufficient focus and measurable objectives warranting the use of race, unavoidably employ race in a negative manner, involve racial stereotyping and lack meaningful endpoints we have never permitted admission programs to work in that way and we will not do so today that's what they said in that argument so like i said it was all fake like everybody just we're doing it to do it and now they're like okay people are

becoming a little bit more aware of what's happening in the world we got to shut this down we're losing our base that's what the right right wing is saying and so now i want to talk about something that tragically happened a couple days ago the um francis scott key bridge in baltimore was struck by a boat and devastatingly a lot of lives were lost the videos look look horrible scary like it looked like fake ai they they took them like hours to verify because no one would report on because they all thought it was fake yeah wish it was fake i wish it was fake And so someone from a paid Twitter account that spews hateful bullshit tweeted, this is Baltimore's DEI mayor commenting on the collapsed Francis Scott Bridge. And so in case you don't know, Brandon Scott, I don't know if he's related to the person the bridge is named after.

Probably not. But Brandon Scott is a 39 year old black man who was elected as mayor of Baltimore in 2020 with 70 percent of the votes. he did not come through any office of dei also baltimore is a majority black place so like shut the fuck up someone also accused him of looking too young and they were mad that he was wearing a jacket and not a suit which we all know are dog whistles also other people like george w bush and donald trump have been out addressing people addressing the media in bomber jackets the same way that this man was they wear the male equivalent of juicy tracksuits yes like come on and then also we have the recent pennsylvania senator who's a white man jonathan fetterman was walking around in a hoodie and shorts and then in pennsylvania they've now adopted a more

relaxed informal dress code amongst the senators so do i but i just want to share he dresses like adam sandler yes like i understand but i'm just saying come on guys what's the clear clear what's the clear difference here what's the difference here and then another racist account responded and said i have all sorts of problems with dei ideology and dei practices but if these dumb asses are going to simply use dei as a synonym for black then count me out this is monstrous monstrously stupid and offensive so when you even get the racist saying you know what i'm just drawing the line i draw the line here yeah so this is just one of the many times the has been used as a slur it has in a way replaced how the right uses the word woke and critical race

theory or crt and so the other morning brandon scott was on msnbc with joy and reed and he was responding to this comment that was made about him and he said black men and young black men in particular, have been the boogeyman for those who are racist and think that only straight, wealthy white men should have a say in anything. We've been the boogeyman for them since the first day they brought us to this country. And what they mean by DEI, in my opinion, is duly elected incumbent. We know what they want to say, but they don't have the courage to say the N-word. And the fact that I don't believe in their untruth and wrong ideology, I'm very proud of my heritage and who i am and where i come from scare them because me being in my position means that their

way of thinking their way their way of life of being comfortable and while everyone else suffers is going to be at risk and they should be afraid because that's my purpose in life so there we have it di is not a scary word it also includes a lot of people including like i saw a lot of um white right-wing veterans tweeting things and dei includes that if you're a woman dei includes you if you have a disability dei includes you if you will eventually get a disability like dei doesn't benefit you from birth it can benefit you later in life any point in life so fuck off i wholeheartedly agree with this i literally looked up because when i'm watching was watching the news seeing him didn't even notice he wasn't wearing a suit because if anyone

wants to look what he's wearing it's a professional outfit like he looks like he's going to he looks to me like he's going to this is not someone you've pulled up this is not random man off of the street this man is outfit yeah put together and young and gorgeous look but he's 40 like yes yes some of the bitterness there we he is he's a gorgeous man he's a gorgeous man he's gorgeous but he looked like a professional yeah and by no means does he look like a hot man cosplaying a real job like no no it's like we should be intimidated you are smart gorgeous hot and good at your job and and compassionate and and wonderfully uh uh empathetic in like in a way that i haven't seen i haven't seen a government elected official with that level

of compassion on television in a very fucking long time all of that i literally was like i wonder what his history is and i look it up and i was like he doesn't work in fucking de i was like couldn't even embarrassing for me couldn't even wrap my mind around the fact that there is a tragedy where people have died and somehow races are like feels like a great opportune time to be racist go what what the fuck fucking insane yep truly fucking insane and i think that the the fact that the pay twitter paying all that shit is the what gives the voice the megaphone to these fucking rage bait asshole fucking people and the fact that he even had to address this yep he went on msnbc insane yeah fuck them all fuck them all and they need to learn how

to like read and understand like do they not i was reading through that person's account and they're just a disgusting human being yeah just rage beating for money yes and i as a society don't think we should let those people like live with peace no i think they should be tormented in every aspect of their life i don't think they should feel comfortable like walking outside without getting like absolutely punched in the face yelled at punched in the face perhaps might i give this might i give the man we will talk about later a new target yeah unfortunately that will not happen Yeah. Makes me irate. Makes me irate. Horrible. And just for anyone, things I've learned in the last couple of days that whenever you drive across a bridge, you should always have your

windows rolled down. Did not know that. And I think that. But also it's freezing cold. No, no, no, totally. But just along the lines of being able to, you know, wherever you are, like it's not always going to work, but like it's increases your likelihood of a better outcome just a little bit at least but also wholeheartedly i think that uh if something that is built for boats to go under if there's a certain kind of boat that cannot go under it the infrastructure that all Republicans are saying we need more money put into the city how about we put the money in like that should not happen yeah that should not happen we should not have things that civilians and workers are going across things that are in use that can only be done in a certain way

that the people who are using them cannot control cannot control nor can you visibly see any of that horrible horrible and then i read a bunch of things about the height of bridges based on uh having it was i think it was black and hispanic buses were like taller or something and how they and that's like oh my god yeah so ironic we're talking about dei here when we actually could because there could be an actual uh a real history lesson here yeah i read it was years ago but i read about how they built new jersey in a way that yeah certain buses and and things wouldn't go to a certain part of town because of the way that the bridges were built so and i'm sure that happened elsewhere but and probably here in baltimore and they're in baltimore too but yeah i specifically

read about that in new jersey yeah so we could have a conversation about everything in this country is built around racism the country was built on racism that's fucking those people they will be haunted for the rest of like to think that oh haunted for the rest of your lives and your grandchildren your grandchildren your grandchildren and i wish you pain and suffering eternally well you're not wrong thank you i don't disagree i have no hang-ups i have no well maybe No. So mine is a little controversial. And I know this because I said this to Mats once and he was like, no, like he's like, I can't even get into this with you. And I needed to tell him that I was joking. So he dropped it. And I'm not joking. And he doesn't listen to his podcast. So it's

fine. My hot take is writing is for women. Being an author. Oh, right, Tina. I thought you said writing i was like in what oh you know anyone can ride whatever you want to ride but when we are writing with a w and a t that is women's work being an author is for the girly pops and girly pops has a wide range doesn't have it's not i'm not talking about just cis women if you identify as a girly pop you can be an author you can be a writer if you i identify as a cishet man i'm so sorry writing is actually not for you that is for women and I'm gonna sit here and tell you I couldn't I cannot name a single male author I don't know one was John Grisham don't know who that is am I proud no every book that I have read that has ignited a fire in me well one is written

by a man but I can't remember his last name so it doesn't count you like the uh pussy book too she comes first that was written by a man yeah but I don't remember his name so it doesn't count these women have made a lasting impact on my life did stephanie meyer write a book about mormonism coded as vampires yes could a man have written something like that no is what she wrote good no but did it change the course of history also yes every every woman who has been a writer to me has written the they've written my life they've written their dialogues they've written the things i long for the things i care about and i think who's actually doing the heavy lifting of this and who agrees with me is the cut because the cut this is where you were going with this yes

the cut has made it their personal mission and i would just like to say a thank you the cut has made their personal mission for us to know that writing is women's work and we are having more and more illuminating personal essays written by women that the cut says i'm ready to publish this and the way that i have read not even the full article because i am i'm out of my free one so I got to get a link from someone else or a screenshot from this woman who wrote entitled age gap relationships the case for marrying an older man this article opens up with is she a seven write this article no the subtitle is though a woman's life is all work and little rest you know what yes I am obsessed with reading these like a man can't write an article about wanting

to date or about dating a woman who is only Melissa, 10 years younger, only 10 years fucking younger. You can't write an article like that and then refer to your high breasts. Women have a way of making these things so beautiful. And there's only a level of delusion that I think a girly pop can be. And I think what the cut has provided us between Caroline Calloway, between the woman who put her money in a shoebox between this age gap relationship. What this is telling me is what Shonda Rhimes

has been trying to tell us all along. Women's stories matter. Men's stories, I'm so sorry. Until you tell me you put $50,000 in a shoebox or until you tell me that you peruse the library trying to find these men

and you write this in a flowery way as if you are writing a romantic poem, yet you don't post this man on Instagram and about how you're seeking for him and she thinks she invented dating a man older. again she was 23 he was 33 as someone who hates age gap relationships no that's not that big that that man's in his 30s you didn't marry sugar daddy we're in the renaissance of female authors

and i think that the men need to look at the space they're in and i think they need to pack it up because they can't hold a fucking candle to this a woman brought us hunger games i just went through all the audiobooks that i've directed to see what what the ratio was here i've directed about 45 books at this point and only one of them was written by a man uh that wouldn't consider themselves girly pop there you go yeah that's what i'm saying like this is a girly pop career they want to see like women get back in the kitchen get back in the kitchen and get back with your quill and your ink like you go to war i'll write a book about it like let us be let us right and they always say women are too emotional you girlies are too emotional okay we don't start

wars though no and then stop stop trying to write a book like what are you an emotional girl like ew like give it back to me let me type this up on my let me do let me have my cute little stationary like fuck off i don't want to hear what you have to say no mox was like what and i was like he is an avid reader no i know and i was like men care and also you know the example that i told him was what's his name that we talked about who james patterson all of his books were in my book that's true that's what i'm saying and even like the like it's been it has been a heavily hypothesized that will that shakespeare a lot of his written by like a black woman to be exact that's what i'm saying i'm like you go back in history and you go but think about this amazing male author unless i

have seen a picture of him at a typewriter and i see everything written out as it's happening you can't tell me that maybe a woman did you can't tell me his wife didn't write it all and he just took credit about stephen king i don't know much about that man a lot of tv shows i feel like you like actually you know i love that based on no i did he did a mini series about they were stuck in a bubble what was it called i don't know but they were stuck in a bubble and i loved that one it was really good actually your dad definitely watched that too i actually think stephen king might identify like in the girly pop way i'm sorry it was a tv show about people trapped in a bubble that's on twitter girly pop yeah girly pop that's what i'm saying i just think that like

if we want to like get so into like these gender roles i need men to understand that writing is not for you you can crunch a number but so can a woman but like get out of here with this am i marrying someone who's a creative writing major who is a man yes but i identify him as a little more of a girly pop also he likes to write like scary things there's nothing more girly pop than a little horror short story that's what steven that's what i'm saying like you like to get spooky you like to get camp okay girly pop like gone to my head i cannot name a male author the guy who wrote perks of being a wallflower is a girly pop but i don't even remember his last name it's steven first name that could even be wrong charles dickens is that a character the fact that i'm

thinking about i know is a writer also can we just talk about the biggest girly pop of them all Nicholas Sparks. That is a girly pop. Yeah. He is writing about Ali and Noah making love on the floor. Girly pop. Yeah.

What other books do we need? If you're not going to write, like, no. You're a man, you want to write a book? Okay, girly pop. Tell me what it's about. We'll see. We'll see.

And they're getting paid way more, which, stop. Can't even name any of them. Goodbye. Men just need to know their place. And it's at war. or underneath a car not because they were killed but like if they want to fix a car but i would prefer a woman to fix my car did you see there is a mechanic place that is women owned

and women operated and they also it's not here unfortunately i know i hate the mechanic here i know me too but they also have a nail salon there so while you're waiting you can get your nails done up which perfect perfect timing it takes so long and what am i supposed to do sitting for an hour and a fucking half in a little uncomfortable chair uh-huh watching uh gilmore girls because that's what's always on tv that's at the nail salon not at the mechanic no at the mechanic that's how i've always seen i thought that was at the nail salon no i always saw gilmore girls while i was getting my car worked on you don't know that that's not what i'm done i'm gonna tell you right now you can't be confident i think they just left it on it would just be on the tv

they're watching supernatural well still yeah yeah no that's the amount of times that they're like okay well an hour and a half and it's just like i'm gonna sit in this chair next to a vending machine and one of the tv on mute and the coffee uh-huh and the hot cocoa which is just water and i'm like cool i could be getting my nails done if i get in there early enough there are some fresh donuts though oh yeah maybe that's our next business venture we have a lot i know we need to get to well we're gonna take a break and when we get back we'll get into but are you wrong we are back it's time for but are you wrong and this is where we read your submissions that you send to butamirongpod at gmail.com. 300 words or less, you let us know this circumstance or

situation you currently find yourself in and ask us the age-old question, am I wrong? Would you be wrong for feeling this way? Would you be wrong about doing this? The feeling this way, you're never wrong about feelings, but usually more along in the context of the larger story. And we will tell you if you are wrong. So we do ask that you include your age. You can include your pronouns if you would like and it's all anonymous so give people some pseudonyms and we will do our very best uh to rule but it might not be in your favor so it might not be fair yeah we're biased and and and you know what going into it all right first one up hey eminem love the podcast it has helped me through some tough times i am 32 she heard i was a teen mom i had my daughter at 16 now she's 16

and I really don't want her to follow my footsteps. She hasn't even mentioned sex yet, but I would like to be proactive. I am just wanting to do what I think is best. We have a very open relationship, so I feel like she would tell me. I've opened the floor for her to tell me plenty of times and she hasn't.

She's had the same boyfriend for about a year. I also don't want to base her life off mine. Being a teen mom was hard in all caps. it still has its challenges and i just don't want her to go through that would it be wrong for me to put her on birth birth control just in case i don't think so if she wants if she wants to get on birth control that's the thing does she want to get on birth control i know someone parents who i know the whole family their mother put all of them on birth control when they turned 15 no matter what and they didn't have a say in it yeah no that's not okay that's not okay if you're talking

to your daughter if you're talking to your daughter and i don't think it should just be about like having a conversation about birth control like you should have a whole conversation about sex as a whole i see what sex is like consent stds what pleasure is and i think that's really hard conversation that most parents don't have but i think pleasure is a vital conversation to have when you're talking about sex like it should be enjoyable yeah you don't just do it because you think you should do it and so if you've had all these conversations and then she's like i am interested in having sex with my boyfriend at some point i don't know when it'll be yes i would like to go on birth control then you wouldn't be wrong in that situation but if you're

just gonna give her birth control without having a stone gummy like it's not yeah so lucky you had a flintstone gummy when back in my day we had little tablets and they were chalky and disgusting vitamins were like that yes oh you chew it i wasn't actually allowed to have the gummies but i know they existed but i could have the the ones that were chewy and like tasty well he probably could have had those things but yeah so uh have have an actual conversation not wrong no conversation take this pill very wrong yeah i would put it in like the whole like realm of like reproductive health as like a whole because i think putting people on we're putting kids teenagers on birth control without the knowledge of not all birth controls are the same like you

might not like the side effects of this and if like this is just oh we have to put you on birth control without you knowing, hey, this pill might not work for you. And then let's try another one here. Kids, you can just stop taking it. And then it's like, oh, I didn't like how it made me feel. So I stopped taking it, but I didn't tell you that I stopped taking it. So I think that there is nothing wrong with wanting your kid to have safe sex. I also think that no matter how close you are with your kid, sometimes they aren't going to tell you something. And so making sure that even if it feels like a very one-sided conversation, that the conversation is still happening, even if they're not coming to you saying X, Y, and Z, you know, you might not,

they might not participate, but like they'll hear what you have to say and take it in and how it's like, you know, STDs and STIs really important with using condoms. And, you know, even if you're the only partner they've ever been with, if someone can have oral herpes and they can have a grandmother who had it, who then kissed them on the lips and then somehow it ends up on genitals and then that can spread and X, Y, and Z and what it looks like if it's an active outbreak or it's not. But also like, you know,

if you don't remember to take your birth control every day, if you're a lot of, I know me as a teenager was taking like antibiotics for my skin. It doesn't, it's not as effective that way. And what to do about plan B and all of those other things.

My friend, Jenica had her daughter, Annika at younger than 16. And she's, they've talked about a lot. They do like a whole Q&A on their YouTube channel, Jenica and Annika, check them out, where they've like talked about raising a teenager as a teen mom

and like having that parallel age difference of being like, oh, you are the age now where like I was having sex at that age. And like, what is that? And, you know, going back to like, what was the circumstance in your life where this like, was it a lack of sex education? What was the lack of like how you actually understand

about getting pregnant or the privacy or whatever that was? So I think that like caring about this and like not just caring about it in the hypothetical, but in like the fact that if you want to do stuff and you want to have those conversations, i don't think you're wrong at all but i think that without informed consent for like both of you of like what this would mean i don't think it'll achieve anything like i don't think it'll actually

be like effective birth control because effective birth control is the birth control you take and it's because you are invested in taking it as well and it shouldn't also just be a conversation about birth control other types of contraceptives too also i think after you have that conversation like on a mother daughter level than going to the doctor and having the conversation on a medical level so the doctor female doctor preferably if you can because that would make it more comfortable for her having a conversation about it from a medical standpoint as well and like what birth control does to your body too yeah and like i was not a product of like a teen pregnancy whatsoever. But I do think the narrative is important to stress that pregnancy is very hard

and having a kid is very expensive, totally. But sometimes when people are trying to scare their kids or to educate their kids into not having sex, it can sometimes come across as a child is a negative consequence of something. So making sure that in all of this, that that's still your kid that you're talking about. And it's very easy as someone who definitely did that in hearing conversations like that you can take it personally and be like this feels like i did something bad by just being born here and so um but you're very aware of it and i honestly i do not know any teen moms who have gone through this conversation with their kids and like it has not but that it's gone poorly like like the the level of transparency i've seen with like

people i know who are teen moms and the way they talk to their kids i was not talked to that with that level of like respect or honesty so i think like you even wanting to do this and not just avoid all of this is like shows that you care so i don't think you would be wrong if they also want that what's up queens and listeners hey thanks i'm a 24 year old female and i use she her pronouns so with easter coming up my mom sent out a message in our family group chat about tending attending sunday service my family are devout catholics well i still am religious i do not go to church I'm against going to church, but I was literally forced to go my whole life. Now that I'm older on my own, I finally have a choice and I choose not to go.

I have zero intentions on going. I humor my mom by going for Christmas service and that's it. Am I wrong for not going to church on Easter? As someone who is also a devout Catholic, I don't think you're wrong at all. She's not a devout Catholic, in case this is your first time listening. No, I'm not. When I was picking mine, I go, I should pick this one because I know absolutely nothing about Easter.

Do I know anything about most religion? I don't know anything about Christianity without a doubt. i know some things about catholicism but not the good stuff no this isn't is part of christian yeah but they like sometimes they like to make a difference depending on they do but it falls under christianity no it's kind of a branch some of them are a little so far crazy yeah i mean i have i think that like if you stand by your decision with something i don't think that you're gonna regret doing it you might or you i'm like you i mean like i don't think you'll regret it if you like stand 10 toes down on something you'll usually regret wavering in that

for other people's comfort versus your own but i guess like my question is like how long is it are there easter bunnies there is it fun on easter i don't know about in the catholic church because i didn't i mean i've been to catholic churches before but catholic church is long as fuck oh but on easter in the church i grew up in baptist churches and easter is when children are giving their easter speeches so that's a whole thing depending on how many children are there and then there's preaching which is long and it's usually the same thing about jesus coming back because that's what easter's about and then after church there is an easter egg hunt some churches do it before but there's an easter egg hunt and then you go home and do easter at home so it's long

because you have the extra thing of the children giving their speeches and a lot of times with the speeches they didn't memorize it so you've got their parents there coaching them along or if they're just frustrated and they cry and leave or you have my niece airline when she gave her first speech she got up there actually this might have been melanie how did i take it back one of my niece my sister she got up and goes my mom is a good woman and then walked off and your mom was like i know that's right wow some people just go off cuff but yeah what are the speeches supposed to be about it's like jesus has risen depending on how old they are then they'll they'll get like a one-liner but if they like are in middle school they'll get a whole page worth

oh my god and then we would also have people that were only coming to church on easter but didn't come but then they still wanted their children to be a part of it so they have their kids standing up there this isn't even catholic this is baptist church so they have their kids just like standing up there the kids have no clue what's going on but they i guess want to get pictures to share with other people it was a easter is a mess in the baptist church and i went to numerous because i moved around a lot so i went to numerous churches and i can say that easter's a mess i do think easter's the one that like that's the one that like took mox the longest to be like not feeling guilty like when we first started he like went one year i was like what and he was

like i just i feel bad like i just i feel like my dad i was like does your dad expect you to go and he goes i don't know but i just feel like he would and then finally like he stopped going but like it was christmas is still the one that if we have to we'll go to but like can you not go if there's an easter egg hunt as someone who is so pro easter egg hunt can you just go for that part and then be like oh you missed me i was actually sitting in the back i was yeah yeah i was over there you're gonna lie at church i'm sorry as someone who's part of my family's raised irish catholic some of those catholics be lying a lot okay yeah they do but like no you can't lie no but like they they open it up for like in my church it's like if you showed up just for the

easter egg hunt and like you had kids and they want to participate it's open for the community like anybody can come do the easter egg hunt yeah especially if you're still religious like even if you're not i'm not gonna say but if you still like if you still like and you like your religion in the way that you've done it someone pressuring you to do aspects of the religion that you like don't like that's just going to turn you off from it more so if you go to the easter egg hunt you're like oh the easter egg hunt would be fun for me like don't you i'm but aren't i more pleasant catholic aren't i more like into all of this kind of thing versus like the appearance of it so like it's beneficial for everybody not just you yeah but in the baptist church easter's when

you turn looks that is oh that's a little the little the little socks and the little shiny shoes and the headbands and the dresses with the i always wanted a little outfit like that so that that's a plus but as someone who is a christian but does not go to church i haven't stepped foot in a church for any non-funerals in years do they sing on on easter yeah there's always singing okay there's always well it depends on if there's good songs yeah speaking of brie had posted like the the top i think it was top 10 church songs and uh we got into a little discussion um like they it was somebody had did a post instagram post and she shared it and the one that she posted was one of the ones that we did we won we're liturgical dance a

liturgical dance and then the one after the one that was the one after that's like the one that put up us on the map internationally i was like oh all these are bops and are on my playlist i love i love a good church moment with music but like all the other stuff it's just not for me not for me maybe when i have kids i'll take them to get like a base learning but like the minute they don't want to go we don't have to go yeah i love the outfits i love food being served um i love songs i'm not a big food person just because oh i'm not gonna eat it but i like that people cook people love yeah people love that i didn't specifically because i don't like to touch things and that should have been an early indicator yeah probably yeah yeah

i don't like to eat things that from other people's homes if i've never been there if i've been there a lot of times the desserts would have been prepared at someone's homes but you have like a hospitality committee oh yeah and they would be not catering they would be cooking in the kitchen at the church like during the service they have kitchens yes so during the service they'd be kit cooking and i was like this sounds like the fun part yeah to go to actual church put me on the hospitality committee you get to plan a party i get to i get to make some little pigs in a blanket like i love this that's so great yeah that's but if you're catholic right and i don't know what's going on it's catholic church i went to my god brother god mother's catholic church a few times

and those were just long and boring without good music and then we all for communion drank out the same cup and i was like this is gross yeah as far as i know the the irish path like pittsburgh philly side that i know they're not not not not the greatest songs not the greatest that no it was just him yeah so do it how you want to do it you would not be wrong at all tell them you're gonna throw an easter egg hunt at the house yeah and like put on that cute little outfit yeah get little hat and hunt those eggs at home yeah all right well that's the end of uh the segment when we get back we'll get into but are they wrong we are back and it's time for our final segment but are they wrong where we nominate a person

place or thing something in the news current events uh who is just being horrible and awful and we think they deserve to be publicly shamed and it can be anyone or anything we have literally nominated states before uh could be people could be whatever the government so what do you have as our nomination my nomination this week is mario perrin who is a canadian art teacher and is accused of running a quote-unquote sweatshop of children to produce art at school sorry none of those things seem profitable well he set up a website using the art that his students made So he sold pieces for $100 a piece online without the kids' permissions. One of the parents, Joel, I've never seen this last name in my life, but I will attempt it.

Day Bill Foye, parent of a 13-year-old student, took legal action against the teacher and the school board. He said, this guy basically had his own little, you know, sweatshop of children. It's insane. I'm still in disbelief. So he put pieces up and called them creepy portraits painted by different students and was selling them for at least 100 different sources, say up to one hundred and fifty one dollars. I saw another one that was like one hundred and seventy dollars on his website and is believed that he plagiarized the work and had them being sold on T-shirts, cell phone cases and coffee mugs. One assignment from Perrin, the father shared on Facebook said that the students were told to create a project in the style of Jean-Michel Baskett. And a Montreal art teacher, that's where he's from, was using the art and just putting it up on the website. The assignment was meant to challenge and make original artwork in this style, not to copy one from this image.

And then that same parent took legal action. And then the legal notice he sent to the school seeking $350,000 Canadian dollars for violating Canada's copyright law. He used the artwork without consent and in bad faith. the legal notice also said for commercial purposes bear the name of the student as the author easily allowing for identification so he didn't even take the kids names off of this which is also a problem he um one parent michael bennett said that i'm extremely disgusted with this person and that it was unbelievable and now 10 parents of students have joined the lawsuit and are suing Mario and the school for $1.5 million, or $155K per family, plus punitive damages. Money isn't the only thing that the parents want. According to the lawsuit, they want a written apology and full disclosure of any sales associated with the art. And then Edith Laird,

one of the parents, said, my daughter loves art, always has been into art, and this year after everything happened she said to me i don't think i'll do art next year middle school right have we seen any of the art yeah it looks pretty good this is like so many layers of crazy to me because like i don't even know if he's sold any like this isn't like a a way to make an absolute ton of money yeah this is like weird yeah like it's like weird in the sense of being like a power trip to show that you can do that like or some sort of like controlling consent thing because why would you do because you you're going to go through all this effort and like who the fuck you're probably not going to sell any of this yeah and so it's just to be like i i own this shit there's so

much work you have to go into to put up a website and to like messed up create the ability of like are these the original pieces or are they are they like prints of it it's prints because he's putting on t-shirts and mugs and stuff fucking red bubble needs to ban him from making an account ever again but like it takes time like to scan all of those things and upload all those files like and make sure that they're high quality enough to be printed yeah this is so much time and effort for something that is like not gonna make you money and also you're a teacher yes canadian but like teachers don't make a crazy amount of money nor do you have a ton of time So it's like you're going to take all your leftover time and energy as a second, quote unquote, side hustle, like scamming your students.

But you're not actually going to make any money off of this. Yeah. And like they did as far as the assignments going, because this is what they were trying to emulate. No, it's great. Yeah. Like this is the professional that did this. And it's like, what? Like, he's the creepy, creepy artwork. But you're the creep. Yeah. You're like, this is creepy. Yeah. and like ew and don't put at any any remote access to 13 year olds for strangers on the internet to buy ew ew ew i bet his art his art must suck it has to it like the because he can't think of his own art to put up there there's no creativity and he's like i should profit off of

my students and the craziest part is like the assignment of being like don't copy this just using the same style and then he copies their artwork ironic yeah i didn't hear about this at all you know me i try to find things that people haven't heard about no i love that the obscurity is an impressive fuck that man yeah okay for my wrong of the week i would like to nominate all the men punching women in new york sitting so since this morning hopefully this is most accurate it has been 27 women it has been happening uh for a long time lots of people have also come forward which does this doesn't count the 20 this is not as far as i know these are not included in the 27 but people are talking about

uh like years ago when this had happened to them and all like this is not brand new whatsoever it just is actively blowing up because specifically most of the people i've seen who've talked about this. They're talking about it now as saying, well, I've talked about this before. This happened to me like five years ago. Most of those are not white women. And specifically, this really blew up with a white blonde woman. And that's what the algorithm on TikTok favors. So it's getting a lot of attention. First video I saw was Haley Cate. And she describes that she's walking. She was walking down the street and she literally films this right after it has happened. And you can see this giant welt on her head. People were like, that looks like a hematoma. Like you need to

go to the hospital immediately. And she's talking about how she was walking down the street in New York. She's on her phone, but like the vast majority of women, you know, you're on your phone as a sense of comfort and safety, but you are aware of your surroundings. You know, you're not walking into someone and she's like, yeah, I'm looking at my phone, but like I big sidewalk. I know I'm not near anyone. I know that I'm not getting in anyone's way. I'm on far one side. And some man walking his dog comes up to her and just fully decks her, punches her in the face and she hits the ground and he is just gone, walks away. She talks about later, like, I think this was her,

like a woman was trying to help her afterwards or it might've been someone else who had said this, but it was like, was so shaken and startled that like just runs, just is running, runs back home. And so the theory was that like she had even presented, it felt like it was, it felt like a punishment because she was on her phone. It was like, this is teaching you a lesson.

Don't look at your phone. And this theory of this being the cause or not the cause, But one of the excuses for this of a lesson to not be on your phone is pretty much proven when some we find out that there has been an arrest made and Haley has confirmed that it is specifically this guy. Yes. One who has been arrested. When you go on to his TikTok account, his Instagram account, where he is just following and harassing women for being on their phone, which is ironic because he's filming them on his phone. right so his instagram name and his tiktok name is skabuki storia he this is yet to be proven and everyone i've seen who've reported this has said allegedly so i will say allegedly as well he is allegedly the grandson or great-grandson of marcus garvey garvey yeah he has over 83 000 followers on tiktok over 10 000 on instagram and he has also bought his verification on instagram and

the vast like a huge portion of the content that he makes if he is not standing in front of his living room with a Trump banner flag in the background and talking about libertarianism and, you know, wearing his political baseball caps. He is walking down the street of New York City harassing women. He's on the subway harassing women. He's filming people. There are videos of like five minute videos of him not even saying anything, just filming like so clearly. And we know that she knows. We know that she's doing that. And so he's making women uncomfortable. they're getting on their phone to be like someone's following me i'm feeling very uncomfortable and then oh wrong thing to do i'm gonna punch you in the fucking face so um he's confirmed to be the

attacker for hayley and he's been confirmed for a couple of the other people and a couple of the other like reported cases but he's not like this is not all attributed to this one singular man whatsoever and uh some fun facts about him he's run for new york city mayor governor and city council for the past three years and he is running for the 2025 campaign uh for the new york city mayor or governor i think the mayor again uh and he has a five million dollar go fund me someone had donated 65 i would like you to show yourself he's a 40 year old man and he was in fact charged with assault for this and he does have a rap sheet about charged about similar things and it is just uh horrible i really hate how the reporting has been done on this of like

women getting punched is the headline as opposed to men are punching women. Men are doing something to women here and they've been doing it for a very long time. And I'm not going to sit here and say that I have a solution or anything whatsoever. I really, really hate the discourse that this delves into

and like breaks down into incredibly quickly because it goes racist. It goes super like very anti-mental health and like really discriminatory and nasty about that. and then also hating on any sort of city any sort of like anything and then hating women and women need to be doing a better job and also being anti like saying let's take away even more funding like fuck homeless people need to go to jail all of these things when the reason why there is not a clear and obvious solution is because the way that our justice system is set up is a perfect

harmony of being incredibly racist and also not caring about women and so this is there is no good, right solution. And so for anyone seeing all of this, like this should solidify more like a cab, like fuck the police, fuck our justice system, because like there is no justice from this because and I saw people be like, this is why we need to bring back mental institutions. And I'm like, oh, my God, like that's that's what you take away from this. Like this is there. There's just so much failure of everything on all of this. And this is why, like, you know, despite me being like I'm so anti-prison industrial complex there's a gray area in the sense of like right now our justice system and our world does not hold men who abuse women accountable regardless so there is no

there there is something that needs to be broken down from like all the way at the top all the bottom there's like we have to reframe absolutely everything there because as a society men want to beat women that men don't hold each other accountable and all this is just like awful Even the comments on his posts are awful of people being like, oh, man, like I would have punched her, too. Like he has these supporters and these fans and he's only one of the people that we know of. So I was reading and watching a bunch of things on this and something that I think a lot of people have heard. But if you haven't, if this is something that happens to you, make sure that you are screaming fire, not help screaming. I don't know this person get off like making a scene and fight dirty, fight dirty.

fight fight to harm fight to maim don't just fight to get away fight to leave uh an imprint on someone fight to identify someone and make sure that they cannot walk away from this unharmed and a really great tip that i had never seen before that this person was talking about that they carry with them everywhere is spray paint because spray someone spray paint you need medical attention in your eyes in your lungs immediately it you can wash it off of your clothes it's going to take a while to get out. It's going to take even longer. I mean, you can wash it off of your skin, not going to come out of your clothes. And so you have essentially this person who attached me has hot pink spray paint all over them. And it's going to slow them down and harm them in

a sense that like they will need to seek medical attention and get help that way. And yeah, this is just like horrible and awful and like so traumatizing and jarring. And to see people who have been this has happened to them like over the course of like someone's like, oh, yes, happened to me like seven years ago, my first day in New York on my first day of college, like, holy fucking shit. And hearing that, like how the police and justice system have failed since then, that there's nothing has nothing has changed in what can happen from this. And I hope that the only good thing that can come from this is one of the good things I think has come from social media and TikTok is like this community with of women of like supporting each

other, holding like holding each other up and carrying each other through these things and paying attention to men and coming together against all of this stuff is that knowing how widespread this is you then we can't shut up about it because if you keep us all in the dark about knowing this happens you keep people ashamed for reporting this or you keep whatever and i applaud everyone who has come forward and said this has happened to them because a lot of people have said they felt really embarrassed and they felt like they just like i should have been watching where i was going and all of these kinds of things but like breaking down and being like no i was a victim i didn't do anything fucking wrong helps other people feel comfortable coming forward to

this and like making a rise about this and this shit like should not fucking happen yeah horrible yeah i saw some man i don't even know if it was about this story specifically but some man it was this past week was like women need to stay in the house like it's dangerous out here and i'm like i put in the i was like reading through the comments and i'm like is no one see it's men that need to stay in the house like why shouldn't we be able to live our our lives safely because men are the aggressors fuck that no men can't hold each other accountable so then we need to protect each other i'm not you can't shame and fear us i mean we can't we can't be afraid of you and be shamed into like silence and submission at this point so it's gross it's so fucking gross

and uh also again not at all suspicious that there can be like the fact that for a while they've been trying to pin like all of these on this one man i'm like oh yeah yeah for sure because of course women there's already 27 women but it's not all men it has to just be this one person because every woman knows someone who's been sexually assaulted but no man knows any man who would have ever do that yes i mean it's like similar to asian hate when people are going around punching old people in the face old asian people in the face and it was like people at first were blaming on one person it was like no there are a lot of hateful people out here yep and like when we encourage and we let that rhetoric fucking slide and we let whatever discourse online and

we're fine with it and then we monetize that discourse it incentivizes people to to do this because they feel emboldened by it by literal financial gain not just notoriety online or just truly financial gain. And it's fucked. And I encourage everybody to like silent bystander effect to just be aware of your surroundings as a bystander and intervene, help when you can. And don't just assume someone else is going to. Yeah. If you see something going on that does not look right and you're driving on the street, I will pull my car over and my car is still locked and I will just see, make sure, figure out what's going on and then be like, oh, OK, these people laugh okay this is someone else is here whatever that is but just knowing that intervening we need

to be doing that for other people because we will we expect and want that done for us and community is like a community is a conscious everyday act it's not just something that it appears out of thin air when we're in dire need like we have to build that awful disgusting horrible and yet people are also showing like great self-defense stuff and like fighting things and that stuff which I hope no one ever has to use. But I was like definitely brushing up on that from people I follow. Yeah.

So carry spray paint and also check whatever is legal, wherever you can carry, what other things you can. All right. Well, that's the end of our episode. We hope you all enjoyed. And if you did,

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That's true. Well, we hope you all enjoyed. We love you so much. Stay tuned tomorrow to listen to the results from last week's episode. And let's see when I get the votes up for this week. I sent them right away. You already sent them?

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