Don't Blame Me! - Boyfriend Forgot we Hooked Up in the Past

Episode Date: October 27, 2022

For But Am I Wrong Melisa: Am I being scammed? Meghan: The reason we have science is because of shitty medical care. In But Am You Wrong they if listeners were wrong in the following situations: Being hurt by your forgetful boyfriend Wanting to hookup with a guy even though you hooked up with his friend in the past Not supporting your chronically ill friend Friend wanting a refund on a trip And in But Are They Wrong AKA "Rachel of The Week" they nominate, Melisa: Shein Meghan: Bethenny Frankel Write In: [e-mail] Weigh In: Vote in the weekly poll on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/by.meghan.and.melisa/ Buy Our Merch: https://store.dftba.com/collections/don-t-blame-me Join Our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/dontblameme Follow Us: https://www.instagram.com/meghanandmelisa https://vm.tiktok.com/TTPdYV7J5p/ Follow Meghan: https://www.instagram.com/meghanrienks/ https://twitter.com/meghanrienks https://www.youtube.com/c/meghanrienks Follow Melisa: https://www.instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa/ https://www.instagram.com/diamondmprintproductions https://twitter.com/SheIsNotMelissa Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Going on vacation? We're here for it. With kids? Who turn the backseat into a courtroom drama over whose tablet is louder, whose charger is faster, and why watching the same cartoon for the hundredth time is a human right? Yep, we totally have vehicles to handle that. Because whether it's a road trip or a business trip, where your flight's delayed, your phone's at 2% and your dinner is whatever's open, yep, here for that too.

Enterprise. We're here for it. hello everybody happy thursday yes it took me a minute to process that yeah i could tell i literally saw the do you know roly-poly-oly it was like i saw the gears turning in your head yes what are they made out of but roly-polies no roly-poly-oly i don't know aren't they like gears i didn't really like watch it i just know what it is i really think that's funny about like children shows that like we don't question like spongebob like there's just like somebody is spongebob really a kid's show i mean it's actually the best kind of kid show because you can watch it with children and as adults you can make this is fire this is funny and they're missing half of it

and then it's a timeless show for all ages but i think it's technically designed for children yeah roly-poly oly he's always a robot okay i was watching the barney dark documentary this weekend is it good i mean i wouldn't even call it i would say it's like a two-parter they could have just made it one thing i thought i was just gonna because like the the sesame street one the one about Big Bird is just like all the feels and the Barney one is like this man literally started the national Barney hate group I don't forgot what it's called because he came home from a business trip and his daughter didn't get off the couch to greet him and so then he started a hate group and like they have a woman that is a former white supremacist and she left it and now like

helps people get out of it and like she was there giving her insight i thought i was sitting down to watch something very sweet because like bill nye's in it steve from blues clues is in it al roker is in it you missed the trailer and i didn't watch it oh my god i never watched trailers i'm sure that was the most alarming thing to watch when i saw the trailer i went holy fucking shit like it is literally like so fucking intense so i can't even imagine not seeing the trailer thinking or watching like the uh mr rogers yeah i thought i was sitting i thought it was about to be this heartfelt thing i remember i'm still convinced i never asked him i was in first grade and i'm convinced that one of the kids in my first grade class was on barney like he had the same name and

like everything where'd you grow up where was where were you and i was in tennessee and they made it in texas yeah i was gonna say yeah i know that because of selena and demi because as a disney channel girly that was their origin story yeah wow i want you to watch the trailer now because when i watched the trailer i was like did someone kill barney like is barney gonna die at the end of this they like there were a lot of rumors that the guy that was inside of barney was dead for a while and like his mom called him and was like everybody's saying you're dead that's unhinged and he also was like or still is he's here in la like a tantric sex person and like he was before Barney too so the original guy that was in Barney this was he was

only in it for a year before it became like the Barney that we know today he was yes at the startup point he was like I gotta leave the army is calling me and I was like great I don't want to see you the rest of the documentary so then he he's gone and then they found this other guy like it was just like they needed an actor that could move very well and he like came they were doing a live show so he came out at the live show and like the crowd like went crazy and so he's like the movement that we see is what who what we know of as Barney today and they made him like sign a saying that you cannot practice tantric sex while you're under contract which it checks out and now he like that's like what he does now here in LA did they get into how much he got paid no but

they're all millionaires i i would be really curious what his like because that was in the days of like residuals and also like those children's shows you film like that you can like fucking stockpile shit like because even the way that even started it was like it was just the the creator of it she was a school teacher and her son never like sat still and so she went to the blockbuster got a vhs and it was like just like this video of these this like people those stuffed animals that came to life like a bear or something and he paid attention to it and she was like oh i wonder if i could make you know something like this that he would like and so she was married to a guy that his family had like one of those like local stations

you know yeah and so she she pitched it to the dad and then they made the show and it was just going to be like one vhs and so then this lady saw one of the vhs tapes and she at the time was a stay-at-home mom but she had been working marketing before and she was like i want to like start doing barney birthday parties because like kids love this yeah and so she went and started and like pitch she was like hey i want to help with the marketing for this she just becomes like the head of marketing and then they make a whole bunch of vhs tapes and it she like goes to different mom groups and like sells the vhs tapes essentially and it ended up in the house of a man that was like the head of and working somewhere in pbs and he saw it and then was like let's make

this a big thing it's just women doing shit like yeah and so but then her the woman who made it for her son he because they would refer to her as like the mom barney and then he like when he got grew up and kind of got over barney he got like really dark and he was in i don't if you don't want to be spoiled fast forward like five minutes um but he being a rich kid because he had like a multi-million dollar like six million dollar house in malibu yeah and just didn't like people and he wouldn't one of his neighbors had well he had put up a sign saying like please don't like trespass on my property and there's video footage of this happening one of his neighbors like just walked up to see what the sign said read the sign walked off and then this guy went over and was like

having an argument with him and then the guy the neighbor walks back in his house and he shoots him in the back oh he's out of jail now like he did sometime but he's out of jail now and is married with kids he had actually had the same partner and a kid before but like multiple kids now wow yeah also that his dad slash the lady's husband died by suicide because he didn't like that he didn't get any attention i mean i'm there's other things yeah but no that's i mean i'm not a parent but like when a kid can't sit still and all that stuff like there's yeah there are things that we have to learn but there's also things that like you know kids are very good at like showing you they're like things that they're really good at and things they might struggle with more and

sometimes it's not a solution it's like oh this is the reason why yeah let's get to that and figure that out because like band-aids work for tits i'll just say no are you okay with that i'm okay with it everybody check out the patreon see the tits wow yeah i was debating if i was gonna watch it or not i loved barney as a kid which is shocking because i hate characters dressed in costumes that have their head included but for some reason i think it was like it's the most like it doesn't even as a kid it didn't feel like the like i can't fucking say like mickey mouse at disneyland scares the shit out of me it doesn't feel like that like it feels more fantastical also because like he's so much bigger than all the kids like it does bigger and

he's just like positive like mickey's got some others because mickey wasn't originally meant for kids and like yeah and barney's not quirky barney's just like doing it i don't happy yeah and i loved it so i don't know if i if i could watch it but i i have debated there was always like so many rumors that it was like that barney was like a serial killer like all of these things talk about all of that in the documentary i was like my parents shielded me from all this because i didn't know any of it i think i like heard it in like middle school or something but they even have like the producer from jerry springer on in this documentary because like there's just like hate going on and they would have like these people that hated barney on the show well also

i wonder if i don't know if they dive into it but like there is like some people like literally hate children like they hate children so much and anything that's for children they hate like and it's like there's just like bitch like so much and like it's it's a it's a very alarming thing like you don't have to like want kids but this like really intense hatred for children i don't know i it feels really like layered and there's got to be more to it but i'm like they get into it they also have like college students like they used to throw parties where you would bring a stuffed barney and you just beat it to like till the stuffing fell out of it and they're just like we feel like it's uh taking it away from sesame street what what you can watch both the program's

like 26 minutes long yeah if you're watching like the but why do you care you're in college yeah like i'm sorry you so you need therapy like if you're still fucking thinking about it it was like huge yeah there were like parties and they have clips of all this but anyway this is but am i wrong a show where we judge if you were white we do you're right as a white person we are we deserve to be judged we are we are ripe for the judging like that is yeah right or wrong in a situation so um we have a segment called uh but am i wrong and that's where we nominate things from our lives or just a hot take that we have and then we have but are you wrong and that's when y'all write in with your issues and we'll

judge if you were right and wrong in situation and then we have but are they wrong aka rachel of the week and that's when we both nominate a person place thing a noun it could be an idea too that we think is just the wrong of the week absolutely and it's a great time so submit just pop your head i mean your headphones are okay pop your headphones in your headphones are either on or you're in your car enjoy the ride and this will only hurt a little so oh and the best part one of our favorite parts about the show is that we include all of you our audience so all the things that we talk about in every single one of our segments we then go and make instagram stories so there are polls for you to vote on for who you think was wrong in each situation so if you

thought melissa and i were wrong in our own individual ones which of the writers who write in for the second segment and then also again for the rachel of the week if you agree or disagree so we have an episode coming out tomorrow on our fisting friday fisting hey and we did get a couple of suggestions of new names we'll discuss in tomorrow's episode we will be reading the results from last week's episode in that episode tomorrow and then the votes for this episode today will go up tomorrow on the Instagram. All right. So now we're going to get into, but am I wrong? And so this is a situation in my life. So I got a message on LinkedIn. Why did I get LinkedIn? So that I can connect with people that I want to work with. And so, um, I got a message very late on a Friday and

I was like, why is somebody messaging me? But then I saw it there and like on the other side of the world. And they said, I wanted to connect with you to introduce you to one of my, I'm paraphrasing it, to introduce you to one of my clients that wants to do, wants to hear like your knowledge based on a certain company, I will not say, and would see if you'd be interested in chatting with our client and potentially like consulting with them. And I said, thank you for reaching out. can you tell me like who the client is and what the consulting is and the thing is that they won't tell me who the client is and then they also the company that they want to know more about there's no public information that I've worked with this company have worked with this company

I don't understand why this random lady that's across the world would even know who I am or know that I have worked with this company and then so I asked her like who it is she won't tell me who the client is and so is it wrong of me to think that this is a spy because I don't know how else they would know any of this information unless they work with another specific company and have heard that I'm doing business with this other company i feel like you're speaking to a double agent yeah like i think it's somebody who is knows the inner workings behind the scenes and knows that you're doing this and they're they they're being a double agent they actually are working for the other i see you know no but the other people

already asked me and i've already told them like the new people they already know and they're like yeah this makes sense because it's happened with some other people so it wouldn't be then so i know it's not then oh so they're just agenting they're not even double agenting yeah single a single agent like if you're gonna be a secret agent like being a double agent's pretty fucking cool yeah wait that's i don't think you're wrong it's like really fucking weird it's very weird i don't like that did you ask them were you like how did you yes i asked i said and then she just talked around it thank you for your response as mentioned i'm working on a project on behalf of the client fucking you're giving your experience and position within the organization what

organization i work for my own company so ma'am is this a scam but it's very specific and very timely for something that's happening i don't know how rude you could or like how direct you can be on linkedin because i would be like hi again could you let me know that how i mean i'm going to do that like how you found me and then that's it how i would like to know why and why do you know this information i would just say how first yeah how but like because there's only one they're kind of a bad spot you know like it reminds me of um there was like this drama in the uk while mott's and i were there and i was like i love being here there was one drama that was like not fun at all that one was like really fucking sad uh i think it was the u i think it was the

u.s the u.s um ambassador's wife was driving on the wrong side of the road and hit and killed a child on their bike and then got diplomatic immunity and i go that's not what that's fucking for but uh there was light-hearted fun news as well when we were there and it was like they were two soccer wives football wives and one of them like had suspected that um like all these things kept leaking in her life and she was like who the fuck is saying this like none of it's public like but it just keeps getting out and then she had like a feeling on who it was and so then she set everything on her like instagram story like her close friends and stuff she like removed everybody except for one person and then she posted something like fake and then the next day

it was like in the daily mail or whatever and then she like made a post being like i had all these suspicions and like this is what i did and it was her and then she like literally tagged her and now they're like in court suing for like libel back and forth and all this shit and it was just like wow wow like smart yet this person not as smart not as smart like this is nothing that's in public you know that's what i mean it's like what if you just said like i'm not working with them right like which big no you are it's like well how do you know that i would just be like okay let's cut the bullshit that's like who hired you and like how can i get a cut how can we work together to get it said they're gonna pay me no i know but i need but i also asked her it was like

how much is it and she didn't give me an answer yeah and you're like well i need to know am i upcharging them because i don't like these people or like what's the how are we gonna do this like let's work together let's scam let's scam let's scam girl it's definitely a real person though because otherwise i would include their name because i'm like let's scam you're not wrong i'll follow up next week so you're not wrong at all and i can't wait to follow up my but am i wrong is also a hot take in this environment with these people as in us in our audience probably more lukewarm but this is something i've been thinking about for a while especially in like the last couple months but obviously we all know that our medical system is fucked our insurance system is

our health care in the united states is all fucked and we've got so much distrust of doctors and all of this kind of shit but the entire reason that we have pseudoscience is because of shitty medical care yeah that's like that is that i think that like if we had addressed and we do address the inaccessibility of medical care in places and some doctors who really fucking talk down to patients but like poor medical care leads people to shitty fucking pseudoscience do you know how many tiktok account like there are people who like get to pseudoscience and shit that like there's some people who like pseudoscience is like eugenics based like there are some that are like purely based in like absolute like disgusting hatred but like specifically in

the united states the amount of people on tiktok there's like one specific person who like i don't even want am i going to say their name because they're so fucking problematic and they their kind of content targets other people who were in the same dark space that they were in and then essentially like gets them to believe their shit which i like don't want at all but this tiktoker had a really fucking traumatic hospital birth and that happens birth is really fucking traumatic anyone who has like made it like oh like modern medicine has done wonderful things for birth but like united states still has the highest maternal mortality rate like birth is still like a real it's a high risk thing regardless. And she had a really rough birth experience and then had a

bunch of fucking trauma. And so she decided to do a free birth at home and had no medical intervention. So didn't go to doctor's appointments, didn't get checkups, didn't get ultrasounds, didn't do any of that. And then gave birth at home with no doula, no medical care, nothing kids are not vaccinated kids don't wear shoes they don't brush their teeth they don't use toilet paper they use towels and even when they go to restaurants they use the hand towels to wipe their shitty asses like it is just like this downward spiral that stemmed from shitty medical care which that shit happens in hospitals like you can have a bet but it's also about how the medical professionals respond to that and a lot of the time out of their control it's insurance

companies you can't take you can't say things that might be more comforting and accepting fault because that's an insurance liability and it's just like a whole fucking thing that like watching this decline of this person and then the people that they attract are also people who have had traumatic births and then they turn in to this and then it becomes well i didn't trust this doctor to do this thing. So why should I trust them to do anything? And it's just like, it's just so wildly fucked. Or even like, if I think about like, I've got IBS, I've had stomach issues, like my whole fucking life, got an endoscopy, like really traumatic experience getting an endoscopy. They did not like sedate me enough. I was awake during all of it. And all of that

to diagnose with IBS, which they're like, we don't, we really can't do anything for you. we don't know and so then you have these companies that step in that they're like oh we're gonna get a sample of your blood for 250 like send us a sample of your blood and we're going to like run all of this thing and then we're going to tell you these like food sensitivities you have that like they're they can't track any of that stuff and we're going to do this and then we're going to sell you on these supplements to do this this this and this that it becomes like so many of these wellness companies that are like literally backed in like based in pseudoscience have found their niche because they're like oh there's something missing in the market here and it's

like well you can either go to the doctor and do this or I can make a supplement that will tell people that this will like fix something about them that they went to a doctor's appointment for and a doctor doesn't have like the time and the energy nor the resources to figure this out and it's just like we've seen it the most specifically with like vaccine hesitancy and like anti-vaxxers in like the COVID era that like everybody has most people have like a traumatic or like a shitty medical experience and then when you pair that with a certain kind of individual that leads to this but even like some other fucking like random pseudoscience like I saw something that was like talking about in like the early 2000s was like cabbage soup diets and

things that are rooted in like diet culture i'm like i consider myself to be like a pretty responsible person when it comes to like medical stuff and like researching things but i'm like oh my god yeah i fucking did i like had a cabbage soup diet like i like even like at a certain place in my life i'm like oh yeah i'm more susceptible to these things because we have varying levels of them and there's a wonderful episode of um maintenance phase that talks about like celery juice and how that leads to like q anon and all of that shit which is all leads back to yeah but like i don't blame like current medical workers for an issue at all because they're they're pigeonholed by like what they really can and can't do and like how overworked they're there's some

people who are terrible people and shouldn't be in those jobs but that happens to everybody like across the board and jobs it's not that industry specific but i can't even imagine how much more frustrating it is to medical professionals recognizing that you're seeing that you like can't provide the care that some people like really need and knowing that because you can't do that because you don't have the resources to do that that they are going to then turn to something that's like not real and like not backed in science and like you don't have the you can't like gently guide people to that you know like it's just like it's this desperation that we're all like looking for to like solve something and i think it would be lovely if you know everyone

from everywhere like if we could get the people who are so like anti the u.s medical system to instead of just saying fuck it and giving up like being on the side of like we need like health care like reform like we need all of this versus saying like like screw doctors like i'm just going to go back i'm just going to be i'm just going to be reading books and figuring this shit out on my own like it feels like we're losing people from our side from it but yeah it's i just want to push back just a little bit yes like i everything you said is correct but there's also very wealthy people that have access to all the unlimited health care that there is because they are able to pay for it that are also very much into pseudoscience it's a

certain kind of it's a certain kind of personality because there's two yeah it's the personality i won't it's not just because our health care system because regardless if you have access we would all be into pseudoscience as well it's like it's this combination of feeling some people who can feel like very slighted and harmed by a system and like rightfully so and then there's also like people that think they're above the privilege of like i'm not getting it's i'm not getting the treatment that i need versus i'm not getting the treatment i think i deserve yeah yeah and i i fully agree and it's it's both of those you have that and then you meet a certain personality type right and that's how it gets to it and it just feels like

it like just it makes me like sad like it makes me sad like seeing people especially when it comes like new mothers and all of that shit and it's like even these documentaries about like certain things and I'm like I can't fault you at all like I really can't like because especially in like the chronic illness community or people like you spend so much time advocating for yourself and that requires confidence knowledge and also it still takes a really fucking long time and it takes a certain kind of person to be able to like fight for themselves health care wise and that doesn't feel empowering to some people like to some people that feels like dehumanizing and what's empowering to them is quote unquote researching and doing their own stuff and it's just like well

fuck like it feels like we've made this problem worse you know yeah not us as individuals but it feels like as a whole yeah yeah the thing about science is that it's something that does involve like you can't have science without doing a lot of research and again this is like people there's either like you said there's some people that think they're above it or that they think that they're just as smart as people that have gone to school and studied this or people that they've run out of like options and they think this is the next thing like there's science but like in order to get to science you have to do a lot of research and so they feel like they're doing that ground work but they're actually doing it without any knowledge of what the bases are yeah and like no

control groups and no like long-term like all of this shit like it's or they see a study and they don't realize the study was done on like five people and it wasn't even a study it was like done over two days and it wasn't there's again no long-term study done if it's not written about in a reputable medical journal and has been peer reviewed it's not real science yeah and even then it's like were was this tested on people who have your health history was this tested on the people of the same like genetic makeup as you is on the same people who are the same height and weight as you like with the same lifestyle habits as you like i'm in a bunch of like long covid subreddits and there are people who come in to them all the time who are like hi i'm uh i'm a doctor and i'm

starting to do this if you pay me this much and like you're seeking out people who are in in desperation and i see people every day making these posts of being like i read this thing online this is like a chinese version of like an ivermectin kind of thing that's being treated there like i want to do this and like the mods on that fucking subreddit like spend so much time i'm sure like just trying to like reach out to people and being like we understand that you're like so desperate but this you can't share these things that are like unfounded and not real but yeah when people are like going to their physicians and everyone's like that's not you're fine like it's in your head that these tests are coming back negative or even like doctors were like

yeah we don't know what to test for but there's something wrong with you and it's like this helplessness feeling that like i think the biggest culprit of this is that like health insurance companies because it's like where the money is it's not just like not everyone who works in like medical field is like fucking raking in dough and like choosing to make so much money like it's like they literally in order to keep their jobs have to do certain things that keep their hospitals profiting and that's the issue and everybody is kind of backed into a corner and you have people who are backed into a corner who don't have the knowledge and when you're a doctor and you're backed into a corner like you have the education you have the knowledge like make decisions or

find people who can like lead you to information that can help do x y and z but when you're not yeah there are also doctors out there that are teaching pseudoscience yep dr oz is he a real doctor yeah because remember i did that thing about how when he was at that research lab oh yeah with all the killing animals yeah uh he is what kind of doctor is he cardiothoracic surgeon like he's a doctor doctor anyways that is my take and my advice to everybody is just be like so fucking cautious like be just so cautious because you can wreck so much more havoc on your body than like pseudoscience like these things like they're not as harmless as they seem they're a really slippery slope even if you don't think you're susceptible to them i've been

susceptible to them like and the best thing I've ever done for my health this might sound counterintuitive but was like to recognize that like it is better for me if I'm having a bad IBS week to just acknowledge that like radically accept that like I might not be feeling so well and I will wait for an appointment at my doctor and like do whatever I can to like mitigate and manage things but like sometimes there's not sometimes there's not a solution and it's better to like save your time your money your energy and like your mental well-being than searching for something that like might not exist right and it might not exist right now but it could exist in the future yeah and like don't spend all your money and like all of these things on this that

like accepting something doesn't mean that like you're defeated or like that it's never going to get better or it's never going to improve but it's just like recognizing and knowing that like there are certain people who you should be getting this advice from and if you take a break i this might be a really bad advice but like for me i'm like if i can put a band-aid on something until i'm in the place that i'm like ready to address it with like the people who i can afford to do the good thing all that i'm just gonna put a band-aid on it yeah nothing wrong with putting a band-aid on it and waiting waiting it out until you're like okay this band-aid is soaked through now time to do this you know so that's what i gotta say you're not wrong thanks

all right let's take a break now that is what happens next now it is time for oh hi welcome back do you have a good break we hope so also everyone go watch the video version on patreon you should we look cute today yeah we look cute every day we try it actually comes like totally effortless to both of us i was about to say okay so if you want to submit for the but are you wrong segment you can send us an email at but am i wrong pot at gmail.com you got to keep it under 300 words we ask that you include your ages you can include pronouns if you would like tell us a story it's all anonymous but for our mental well-being and sake of not trying to improv when you write it give us fake names for

people in the situation involved and give us as much info as possible and we'll come for you or support you correct hi eminem i love both pods i'm writing to get you guys's take on a situation involving my new boyfriend 23 mil and myself 21 female we have been seeing each other and going on dates for about three months and exclusively dating for only one month at this point he's a great boyfriend but i recently discovered that he forgot that we met and had sex a couple years ago before we started seriously dating shut the fuck up in the summer of 2020 we met on bumble we also have some mutual friends after texting a bit back and forth for a few weeks he asked me to come to his house very much so under the pretense of having a casual hookup and i did we really got

on well though i know you meant you got it on well and after we hooked up in august of 2020 we never stopped talking and texting until November of that year when we eventually fell out of touch but at that point we moved to different cities we never connected in person again after that until this year that was all very casual and intentionally non-exclusive but we were we were talking basically every day today we were talking about us hanging out all those years ago he said in 2019 i was almost a part of his hoe phase but didn't quite make the cut because we only made out i'm 100 positive we had full penetrative sex that night am i wrong for being hurt that he forgot we had sex dude this is better than i thought because i thought he like

forgot that you talked like i thought he forgot all of this happened yeah because like you have text proof that you like because if even if you like you stop talking unless you completely deleted their phone number from your phone you still have the old conversation i know i was like does he have like a double double life somewhere else so this makes you feel a little bit better but like not good not good i mean he was in his hoe face so i'm sorry but to him you're just he was a dime a dozen yeah you're just another bitch but i feel really bad that he doesn't remember you at all i i don't i don't think that you're again you're not wrong for your feelings ever also this one i'm surprised we didn't get to this is from like august i i don't know how we skip fucking neither

as soon as i started reading this i was like what because we have like summer like we'll like look at them and like we'll like pick because we each pick ones and i like literally i was like i'm scrolling all the way up to what are you picking and i was like where was this exactly and also like this was i just i said that to say this was before we said don't write in like about your feelings and stuff but fuck i i i would feel bad i feel bad right now like can you imagine you're like what what was your face how many people did you sleep like my face i'd have been like huh yeah like i'm not judging at all i'm just curious how many people he slept with that he forgot you dude i'd be so mad like does he have other memory wait okay he's a great boyfriend

but i really discovered that he forgot we met and had oh so did he think you never met in person no because then she only made out he thinks that they are only made out also i really don't like how he phrased that like you almost made the cut and it's like first of all you did penetrate me and like you keep penetrating me i mean i got in the guts cut yeah like you've been in my guts and like remain in my guts to this day oh my god you're so not wrong at all but i fucking need to know what he said when you were like nah we fucked and then did you say you didn't say she didn't say what she said what happened yeah like no i'm saying like did you say no we actually had sex did he just say you know we were i was in you almost made the cut from my hoe face and

then you didn't say anything please tell me you said something because like i don't think that at least at this point now we're coming up on like a year i don't think she did oh my gosh okay you have been given homework yeah you need to fucking tell this man that you had sex and then also like you need to be like you don't remember having sex with me how many pussies how many yeah how many things yeah because did you fuck we don't know his sexual orientation yeah it might have how many different forms of orifices and genitalia did you have interactions with that you forgot my prize-winning pussy yep i would be so offended like there's these like i forget what it was it was like in a tv show or like maybe it was just in like a tiktok or something but it was like

you know closing your eyes and like kissing a girl and being like can you tell it's your girlfriend or whatever and everyone's like oh i totally could and like some scientists like you literally like unless you have like the smell or you have something else i'm sorry but i can distinctly remember most dudes that i've kissed like people have certain ways of kissing no i know but i think it was something like or maybe it was like just touching it was something it was something along the line i understand it was something it was something where it was like could you tell that this was like a partner or whatever and it was like basically being like you know like of course you want it to be like that but like you probably couldn't tell and i remember watching

that i go i'd be so mad if that's good no it was me but like the idea of maybe it was vaginas maybe that was like the whole thing of like could you would you be able to know like are the inside of vaginas like that in like super different i think it was something like not really how did they do the study i again melissa this might have been a tv show that like was not a real tv this might have just been like pseudoscience this might have been on like i don't know this might have been a bit on like an episode of something like it was just something but i just remember like the thought crossing across my mind that it was like i know logically and like this is what it's saying that logically like they're not like that different but i would be upset and this is like the real

life version of that it could have been a dream who fucking knows but i would be so mad i'd be shocked granted i am also kind of like your boyfriend like i remember i was scrolling on Facebook one day and I came across a picture of someone I go oh my god I had sex with him and like I forgot I found a um an article about people they were like touching foreheads yeah I don't know where I don't know what's like it was a hand to a forehead that's the thing with TikTok you just get so much content that you're like I don't remember where this came from or what it was I just remember I saw something there's another one that's hands I feel like hands are easier too yeah like calluses and it says like women even just size like if you just put your hand like

i feel like you can figure out like your partners you can figure it out yeah yeah this is you have homework i need to know i have so many questions me too yeah anyway you haven't even done your first one okay so hi i 20 female i'm in a predicament i've been friends with this guy let's call him jack 21 male since high school but we were never super close we have a lot of friends in common, and about two years ago, I briefly dated one of his closest friends, Pat. I didn't end up liking him, so I put an end to it. This is only a few dates, and we never hooked up. He did tell me that he loved me, though, but I'm not sure if he meant it or if it was just infatuation because we didn't know each other that well. I hate people

who do that. Not you, like him. I recently started hanging out a lot with Jack because I reconnected with the friends that we have in common. Since we started hanging out more, he started making a lot of flirty comments and hitting on me pretty heavily, but he's a flirt. So I thought this just him joking around as he does. However, this week he pulled me aside and told me he doesn't actually flirt like this with everyone. And he actually thinks I'm very attractive and would be interested in starting a friends with benefits in quotations type of situation with him. I'm interested, but I'm wondering if this would be wrong to do because I very briefly dated one of his best friends. I think that I don't owe anything to Pat and it would be fine for me to take Jack

up on his offer but then i wonder if i would be wrong because i know that jack is close friends with pat and this might cause drama in their front group i think jack is okay doing this to his friend and i have nothing to worry about but am i wrong you're not wrong this happens all the time i would though i would have a conversation with jack and ask him if he's talked to pat about this yeah i would just be like you know that i hooked up with pat i just want to like get it all in the clear like i'm down to do this but like i just you know want to make sure that like you know this and like i'm not friends with him so like that's not my responsibility but like i don't want you to go into this yeah because you didn't know if he didn't know then i don't think that's fair to jack

yeah because he might not it might not be cool for him yeah like he might care but if he does not care it is not your problem and it's also not your problem to anticipate that this might cause problems for other people if they don't care right or if they're like not thinking about it like it's not your job to think ahead for him get it friends benefits fuck it up make sure he remembers you give him a cast iron molding of your pussy leave a bite mark that's leaves a mark forever yeah that takes me back to high school hickeys and like my high school boyfriend and I both have very sensitive skin and so like we'd hook up or whatever and then you have like a swim meet the next day and everybody be nice and like his mom be like she hated me it's awkward i

never went they were so early in the morning yeah i gotta get up at like four every day yeah their swim meets start like 6 a.m i'm like hard pass no thanks all right hi megan and melissa my cousin 20 female and i 21 female are best friends due to severe anxiety and depression she has done online school and lived at home her whole life in the heart of a very big city. Think NYC. She deals with chronic migraines, suspected endometriosis, CFS, and more. She doesn't leave her house much due to this and anxiety and depression worsened by living in such a big city. Every summer, her family goes up to their cottage six hours north located in a remotely foresty town. When she's at the cottage she feels much better physically but mostly mental health wise and wants to keep that

momentum but goes back home and gets bad again. This summer she decided to move to a little university town near her cottage. She got an apartment to live in with her cats. She can't live at the cottage. She has no friends family in that area. This could be wonderful for her but has me worried her migraines are so bad sometimes she can't walk or talk she isn't the best at reaching out for help with her depression and when her depression has been bad in the past having no support in the area and nothing forcing her to leave her house to see people to make sure she's doing well doesn't seem good i've brought this up slash moving somewhere two hours away from her home rather than six but she thinks it's best for her her parents are on board

am i wrong i think you're wrong i understand your concern but i think it's in the wrong place like this is an adult who knows what's best for her um has made a decision her parents are on board with it and it's like you're trying to protect her from something that she doesn't need protection from yeah you're being this is and i know that's not how you're trying to come off but you're being judgmental and a little prejudice as well because this is a health condition that she has that she knows how to manage that she feels better in this place and you don't need to tell her where she should live or be no or make decisions for her like she doesn't know how to reach out for help or that she doesn't leave her house unless it's for something

else like she'll stay in her house let people live their lives and it's not even a let just people live their lives and you mind your own business yeah it's infantilizing and like when you do that to people who are like disabled or chronically ill like it is ableism even though that's not your intention at all and i think this is kind of like the more subtle version for people who don't experience this of like you thinking like you said thinking that you know better than them and the only reason why you think you know better than them is because they are of their whatever mental health or physical health disabilities that they're dealing with they have that and you don't and so like it does become ableism in that but unless somebody

there are a few medical cases where people cannot make their own like mental and physical decisions for themselves and even that can be a really tricky situation and not always done correctly or ethically but like you don't have that so like you have no like ground to like stand on for this and I would like drop it really fucking fast because to someone who has been dealing with this their whole lives not only is it like an immense betrayal from like their best friend and like family member for this but it's like a it's again your intention's not ableism but like that's she that's what it is like it doesn't feel any different like when someone's being ableist with like good intentions or bad intentions like there's a

spectrum of like how that feels but when it comes from someone who's really that close to you like that's you're you're still gonna end up like exiling her when you're saying your whole goal is that like you want her to be close to people so like don't emotionally push her away because she's creating some physical space like and that physical space can be great and it might not work out but also like she can move back right and if you're concerned that like she doesn't always reach out like reach out to her like you don't have to baby her but like be you need to be supportive of people and the choices that they make regardless of like they're disabled or not like having a friend who's like I'm moving somewhere if you took out that if you just like

oh I have a friend who like is moving to this place and like every time that like they go there they're so happy and it like does so much for them and like when they're in the city like imagine someone else calls in and says like should I do this like I want to move to a different city every time I'm there like I moved to this different cottage area like foresty like I'm so happy and then when I move back to my big city it just feels like I'm like weighed down by all this other shit and I really hate that like oh my gosh move that's so exciting that's amazing and like people don't get to pick and choose when they're disabled like you're disabled the whole like you're disabled all the time and if you're born with something but like even if it happens later in life like from

that moment on there's before and after and that's something that is people aren't not thinking about it like you have to go out of your way to think about it because that's not it's not you and your body but like that's like her life like she can't not factor it in like she can't ignore it she can't like not think about it like it is a part of like every single part of her being every single day it affects how she wakes up how she goes to bed how she goes about things and like it's just patronizing and again ableist even though that's not what your intention is to not think that like and like that's okay that you don't realize that like and that's something that like it's a privilege for a lot of people to like not know that but your intentions are good

but the result is not and like change that yep so you are wrong you're wrong okay do you know how we always talk about off like camera like off mic where we're like damn could really throw in a personal story here but i can't that's literally how i'm like foaming at the mouth for it okay hi megan and melissa uh yep i was like this had the last one started but they all start like that hi megan and melissa i 25 she her and four friends 25 she her planned a trip in august where we split an airbnb and the cost of a wine tour two days before we left one of the girls let's call her michelle texted our group and said she had hurt her back but was hoping to still make the trip. The day we left, she messaged and said she wasn't going to make it. I gave her the info

for the wine tour company, and she got 50% of that money back. However, Michelle then expected the four of us to pay for her portion of the Airbnb. This wasn't a question that Michelle asked, but an expectation that we would pay for her portion since she wouldn't be joining. Myself and another friend said in the chat that we weren't comfortable paying for the portion since we budgeted a certain amount for this trip and didn't have the money to pay a significant amount more last minute. Michelle responded saying she'd love to come, but she's injured and didn't want to lose the money. Eventually, we agreed to give her 50% of her Airbnb portion.

To be honest, I didn't even want to give her that, but I didn't want to push it. Fast forward a couple of weeks ago, I found out from another friend that Michelle had recently ranted about me to her how she was still upset with me and felt like I didn't care about her health. I have heard none of this directly from her

and had no idea she was still upset with me. Am I wrong for not wanting to pay Michelle for the money she feels she deserves? Am I wrong for not reaching out to her to mend the situation? i i don't think that you're wrong at all and i think you are generous in giving her 50 percent like that's like if you buy a plane ticket unless you have if and you don't get insurance on it you still have to pay for the ticket even if you don't go on the trip

like she can't i i'm so i i'm sorry that she was injured but this is not it's not her it's not y'all's responsibility to cover for her no and it's also just like a really shady way of going about it like i really hate people who do this where it's like two days before she's like hey i hurt myself i'm i'm still gonna go i really think i'm still able to make it and then the morning of like i'm a big fan of under promise over deliver like if i am not 100 confident i'm not gonna have someone like waiting until be like oh yeah i'm not gonna do that like i'm fine with like I have certain friends like Lily and I we can like really like we will say like do you want to hang out today 50 50 chance let's check in at two o'clock but like we're on the same page

with that like I just think that's like super fucking manipulative to just like it's trying to garner sympathy of being like I really tried to come and like two days before so like it's leading up to it so people can be like oh I wonder how she's doing and then the day of being like it was up until this moment like it's just so and I'm not doubting that she hurt herself or anything like that I mean that at all but like when you when you like make the timeline to kind of like manipulate people into feeling a certain way about a situation like that would make me less empathetic because I'm like if you hurt yourself like tell us in two days before you hurt yourself like oh my gosh I'm so sorry but like when you're stringing us along it just feels disrespectful of

like other people's time and money and then clearly it was disrespectful of that i just think like uh you're not wrong for not wanting to pay her and i don't think you're not i don't think you're wrong for not wanting to mend the situation honestly i would probably confront her though and i just think what's up or if i didn't like her that much talking about me the streets have been talking word on the street your list and your list has been moving come step to me if you got a problem i'll solve it you might have hurt your back but you stabbed me in the back bitch maybe that's maybe that's why your back hurts because you're so busy stabbing me in mine like what yeah you're not wrong not at all all right um time for another break

all right now time for but are they wrong and that's when we pick somebody that we think sucks the most so mine this week is sheen do you say sheen or sheen sheen i've heard it pronounced yeah that's how i say it sheen so mine is sheen i mean they're constantly a rachel of the week but there was a specific report that came out there is a woman who went undercover she this work was done by channel 4 and the i newspaper in the uk and this woman uh used a fake name and got a job inside two factories in China and secretly filmed what she saw as she worked there. And these are factories, of course. And so on average, the workers work 18 hours a day, seven days a week, and they get one day off per month. At one of the factories, they get a base salary of 4,000 yuan

per month and that's equivalent to $556 a month and they have to make at least 500 pieces of clothing per day but their first month pay is withheld from them and many of these workers work long hours to earn a commission of 14 or 0.14 yuan which is about two cents per item. So there's footage at the second factory that they don't get a base pay but instead receive 0.27 yuan or just four cents for each garment they make and then employees if they don't hit their goals they get a fine amounting to two-thirds of their daily wages if they make one mistake according to the report and one of the factories female employees wash their hair on their lunch breaks because there's little time after work to do so and just to put this in context of other

fast fashion companies Xi'an has a hundred billion valuation this was this past April and that's more than H&M and Zara combined and all of this violates China's labor laws and so I just want to say you know do with this information as you will but think about this when you're shopping fast fashion as a whole but also Shein because I see a lot of people doing Shein hauls or look I found this on Shein just you know think about where your things are coming from yeah they make up 28 percent of fast fashion sales so I've seen a lot of rhetoric of online of people being like well why are we going for them and we're not going for like other places people are like this stuff happens at almost I mean it happens at all fast fashion like places like the vast majority of them but it's about

like the scale as well so when you have a smaller fast fashion company the popularity of it and like the demand is not there and when you have a place like she in which like has grown exponentially and gotten so so so huge it becomes more demand and then it becomes this is getting worse and happening to more people and just it's getting worse and worse and worse. It's just fucked. I'm gonna, I wanna share this tweet that I saw. So shout out to Allie with books.

Allie, I love interacting with you on all of my social media platforms. You're wonderful. This tweet is from Dress Histories. And the tweet says, the fast fashion conversation sucks the life out of me because all it really comes down to is people thinking they're entitled to be trendy.

Where am I supposed to get cute clothes if not Shein? I don't know, but you don't need cute clothes if you can't afford them so there's a yeah so that's yeah not a good take nope nope so the fucking the classism in conversations about fast fashion i think is what is holding us back from it like there is no recognition of people who are poor and experiencing poverty and then thinking like oh well if you can't afford something that is like you can't afford of ethical fashion that's really nice and cute that's like what I wear and you're poor then you can't have cute clothes and that is just classist like it it just is and it's also just

being like well you can just go like you can go thrift and you can do this and like it's like well no I I in I am incredibly poor and I work constantly and I have to take care of kids and it's I don't have the time to sort through or I don't I don't fit in straight sizes like I am plus sized I don't I need to find something that like for an event I have to go to things I have to go to work I have to pay for all of this kind of stuff and it just is like the conversation of like about fast fashion like people have decided that it is the fault of poor people and fat people and that's why fast fat like oh that's if it was those people who stopped shopping here and it's like no that's not what it is it's people who are spending like 700 on she and shit that they're

gonna wear one time then they're gonna throw away that's the issue or do hauls exactly like that's the problem it's the core problem and it's i've said it so many fucking times it's not just about what you buy but it's about how you buy and if you buy things in excess you're going to dispose of things in excess and excess is the issue it's not an issue that people like people need to buy clothes they need to buy clothes that they like they need to enjoy what they wear they need to be not need to but like would love that like want people to like feel seen in their clothes feel good about themselves in their clothes and not feel like they're missing out on trends and when we go after people who are like just trying to get by as that they are the result of this like

it is just it becomes abundantly clear that like why you care you it's not about the environment it's just about like your classism and fat phobia like and you've just found a way to repack you've found a way to greenwash classism and fat phobia but yeah it's fucked i will say i shop on thredUP all the fucking time like i love thredUP i literally have to like go through pages of just shein clothes so if you really like a lot of the trendy pieces and especially like in they have like a lot of availability for extended sizing thredUP is a really wonderful place that like if you don't have time to go in person to like a thrift store or like mobility wise like standing up for that long is not that great for you I can't recommend it enough like it's it's

it's really it's really really really great and also if you submit your clothes and like send your clothes into thredUP I think they still do this program but they I don't know if they do it all the time for a while I think it was just like for a certain time period but it might be permanent now like you can use credits that for from the clothes that you sell you can use spend them on thread up you can get the cash back to you or they were doing like a premium one where you could get more credits and have it be exchanged into like a reformation gift card and reformation is you know even ethical companies are not like perfect and it's more expensive but you can use money towards something like that if you like a staple thing that you want to wear all the time so fuck fast

fashion but like keep your like classes right oh all right your turn i can't wait this is i can close my computer you know there's two things in this world that i can you know that thing going around where people are like what's that one thing that you can talk about for hours without any research there's two things for me general hospital or so in general and real house there we go guess what we're talking about i'll give you two seconds everybody's screaming their cars bethany frankel ding ding ding you are fucking correct you didn't even give anybody two seconds no because you said i'm sure as soon as i said real housewives everyone's like oh i know what she's gonna talk about so we're talking about bethany frankel so i am not a

housewives girly so that's why i'm so excited that this is the podcast that we do together because i you can give me a backstory on her and we can talk about what she's currently doing and based on what she's currently doing I can't imagine what she was doing before was I can't imagine it was a total 180 because when you're this confident being this loud and wrong online there's some building blocks to get there so Bethany Frankel sent a TikTok creator Meredith Lynch who I follow who it's like a really great follow she's very like makes really interesting like niche content where she talks about like celebrity brands and especially like really going off of the conversation we just had about she in talking about like the overconsumption and what's

the like useless products that like celebrities are shilling out and like creating just like build up their own image that are like completely ruining the planet she talks about like you know the carbon emissions of like the planes of people taking and all of that stuff and she's great like she does it's very personality driven but she just reports on things and so she sent her a cease and desist bethany sent meredith yes meredith revealed all of this in like a series that she did on her tiktok where she said that bethany had sent her a cease and desist for quote-unquote defamatory statements after meredith talked about like bethany's brands um and there is and it also coincides with bethany as a lawsuit against tiktok right now that's like at the same time

where she's suing tiktok for using her like image and likeness to promote counterfeit products on the platform um which i will say you gotta read the terms and conditions on tiktok like if you have a brand that you want to go after but going after tiktok specifically like you those terms and conditions i remember the very beginning cody co like they were using him in like ads for tiktok or some shit and it was like also used him and stuff for like hinge too yeah and it was like he was like what and then it was like oh no if you made a video on the platform they can just like use it and it might have changed and gotten better but like still like i think they made it up for it with a lot of people where they had them in their actual commercials and then they like paid out

through that way yeah but it's you know that's terms and conditions so meredith made this video and I saw it like just came up on my like following list um and basically just talking about how she was like yeah this really sucks and like this is like I don't want this to happen like I don't want someone to like who's so rich to suit me but also like I really don't like what this means for like the platform that like suddenly like we can't like talk about things and people and like she's not spreading lies like she literally is like she like researches like who I'll get into like what like Bethany's upset about specifically but like she's not lying she's not making these outlandish claims of like oh like yeah like i heard that like it's not like

she's like a public facing dumois kind of thing like that's not what she's doing at all and she was like i really just think that this sets a really bad precedent for like rich people and like celebrities to come on tiktok where it's like bethany literally started an entire fucking series comparing like expensive makeup and like skincare expensive things to cheap things and she gets on there and like will shit talk these brands she doesn't like she gets on there and she shit talks kim kardashian she gets on there and she will we'll get to this we will get to it now she went on this completely unprompted and like very pierce morgan like style fucking rant about megan markle for no fucking you know what the reason is though because the her on her show

no because bethany used to date megan markle's ex-husband why is he everywhere i don't know So like she literally gets on her platform now on TikTok and like talks shit not only about individuals where it's like, OK, you want to get into the Meghan Markle rhetoric. I dare you without being racist because like she's never done a fucking thing, has not done a goddamn fucking thing. And if you can find a way to dislike her, you're racist. It's just it's just fucking racism. Like that's like literally all there fucking is to it. and you have that on top of like talking match and all these brands i don't give a shit if you talk about the kardashians like if you talk on the kardashians like whatever so does meredith like

you're all talking shit but then the second that someone talks about you cease and desist yeah so in the video that like bethany references in her cease and desist to meredith she is like sensually to the videos but she basically had talked about how bethany frankel's company had publicly keyword publicly trademarked the saying it's a scam which is what her like catchphrase is in her in her tiktok videos for merch podcasting and other entertainment products in december 2021 and she no meredith noted that like she started using this phrase more often in video reviews for various products making it pretty clear that this was a pre-planned for a launch of something for business purposes and then she also says uh the letter also covered defamation saying that in the

cease and desist she also said that it claimed that it had to be confidential and she couldn't say that she even received the letter publicly. And then she asked lawyers on TikTok if she needed to like abide by that. But then she was deleting the videos because she didn't want to get in trouble. But she was this is exact quote from her. Yes, freedom of speech is a thing. But what really wealthy people can do is they can threaten your freedom of speech. And if you don't have the money to push back, people are like, oh, but you could just, you know, go to court like I would have to get lawyers to back me up. I think that this person bullies small creators into silencing them. In my opinion, this app isn't really built for big celebrities. We created this really small

we we created this really cool community where people actually state their personal opinions when they see small creators saying hey look i found this or hey look this happened they freak out they'll end up with a video over two million two hundred thousand views then bethany like went on and like did a response where she said that like meredith misrepresented her non-profit be strong and like all of these things were like not true and like not real which is like not what happened at all and the only thing she said about be strong was something about how like it wasn't classified as like a what is it a 10 30 oh 501c that it wasn't yet classified as that it was classified as like something else and like it can be a process to get that do you mean like

it's a it's a long process like she just stated that and like and she didn't misrepresent she didn't say that they were like any like anything like that and bethany said that anyone can say anything they want about her unless they are spreading misinformation and yeah we're gonna we're gonna pick this up because bethany is the biggest hypocrite i felt like you could tell me that yeah so in case y'all don't know because i don't think like bethany isn't like that big of a celebrity i hate her skinny girl branding but yeah that's all i know so she she kind of got her start in the entertainment industry as being paris's and nicky's babysitter what so so she came out to la and she was like trying to be an actor and she was paris and nicky's babysitter and now she's very

close friends with their aunt kyle richardson who is also on she's on well while bethnia's real housewives in new york kyle is on real housewives of beverly hills and so they became friends like back when she was babysitting i took a soul cycle class with kyle she was very nice to me she told me i was pretty so like yeah i said the same thing about abby lee miller not a nice person told me i was pretty what can i do what can i do yeah and so bethany likes to tell people that she like pulled herself up from the bootstraps and like that she's this like she created her self-made and everything this woman went to boarding school her stepfather and mother have they treated her like shit this which is true they they did well according to her i don't like to

put things but you if you watch real housewives of new york then her um she has like she's trying to reconnect with her family and they just won't do it but um she's very monetarily privileged but tries to act like that she wasn't does she like not have like millions of dollars like a lot of the women that started off on housewives yes she was living in when the when real housewives first started she was living in an apartment that's probably as big as this room and she was snarky she also was on the apprentice before she was on real housewives as well so she like she'd been on television yeah and that's kind of why because of her personality they're like it wasn't because of her money everybody else had money but they liked her personality and so they put her on

there and so on Real Housewives she would like start ordering drinks and it would be what essentially is what's known as the skinny girl cocktail now and so she was marketing it back then she started off as like a cook and a bartender was like her shtick on I mean that's how she earned her money was like catering people catering like big events and stuff and so if you watched real housewives from the beginning you saw her come up well she had a big one she skinny girl's worth a lot of money she made a lot of money doing that but as the more money she got the more obnoxious she got and as wrong as ramona singer is about a lot of things i mean ramona parties in mar-a-lago she said and this is like a famous quote bethany does not support women and she

never has never has she doesn't bring people up with her allegedly from my observations i want to say since she's lawsuit uh wouldn't be the first time i've gotten one so yeah so she just she's known for not supporting women and she also is known for making disparaging remarks about black women so real housewives of atlanta premiered around the same time as new york well it new york was out first and then atlanta came um and bethany whenever she would talk about atlanta she would talk about it in a black scent also wouldn't there's you can look this up on like if you want to get on youtube and look at watch what happens live and maybe just type in like bethany frankel talking about atlanta or something and she would talk in a black scent say that all

they have is like their weaves and stuff like white women don't wear extensions as well and talking about weaves and wigs and just talking like it wasn't like it wasn't the same caliber oh god she might i don't remember so i don't want to be misquoted but she might have said that it was ghetto i was wondering if it was leading to that yes um like this was a long time maybe not verbatim but what you're saying is yeah there's an implication there is an implication um and she was jealous of a lot of things that were going on because when new york was a huge hit yeah like oc was there like it put every oc put everything on the map then new york came through and was like a huge hit because the difference was with oc a lot of the women didn't

they were a lot of them were actual like housewives but new york most of them had like their own businesses and things and then atlanta came and that was the first franchise that was predominantly black and it was more of a cultural phenomenon than the rest of them well as someone who's not a part of it every single time i have a real housewives quote you're like that's atlanta that's atlanta that like that's like and i also think that like i could probably only name nini like i could name people who like have iconic or even those clips like it just far more iconic than like like yeah cultural reset like and still had mainstay and like the jokes the the quotes all of that right and so she's been talking about black women in this way for a long time she also

when it comes to who she considers fame she also thinks like women are trying to take things from her all the time she doesn't have what she talks about on the show a lot of female friends i wonder why right it's like she's not a girl's girl as ramona would say again like again ramona is not a good person but when it came to bethany she had her fucking cart yep she also like she was supposed it was the season right before the pandemic so i think 2019 um season of real housewives of new york she quit the day that they started filming that's so unprofessional yes um and she also which i forget that creator that looks like ai that does her danisha danisha i think that's her name literally was fucking watching her videos today so danisha carter

she had said the other day um which she says to a lot of people it it seems like controversial things but i i find myself agreeing with probably 99.9 of the things that she says and she was talking about how the people that are the main manipulators and i'm i'm paraphrasing this but saying people that are manipulators they're they manipulate the people that are their victims in a different way than they manipulate people that are the people that they're trying to say face in front of oh yeah that's textbook narcissist exactly and so bethany does a lot of good for different communities she has her company be strong she does raise a lot of money and takes a lot of money and takes gift cards and food when there's like a natural

disaster she does a lot of good things which is what be strong is is the company that you're talking about but bethany also at her core in my opinion is not a good person because she manipulates everyone around her and so what denisha was saying that manipulate i don't want to call say a narcissist like i'm not going to call it but people that exhibit narcissist behavior seem really good on the surface because that's a form of manipulation because they want you to think that they're the best possible person so then when someone accuses them of abuse or something like that then it's like no i could never see them doing something like this because they do x y and z and that's kind of how bethany i feel like sees herself is like i do all this good

so i can't i give money to haiti i can't be racist against black people that gives me that same vibe as um that the specific brand of white christians where it's like well i'm a christian right and i'm like that doesn't mean anything when you're being like a hateful bigot like i don't it doesn't that that's not the get out of jail free card that you think it is but no yeah about manipulators and people with like dealing with like in that situation narcissists or people if they're displaying narcissistic behavior like not only is it like making other people doubt like creating an image of yourself that like if anything else comes up that disputes that would make people doubt that but also specifically discredits your victims like it makes it shifts the blame onto

other people but i also just think that like you can be a really bad person and have like care have care about charitable causes i think that there's very few people in the world who like legitimately do not have any causes or anything they care about like i think you'd be hard pressed to find someone who's like i don't give a shit about childhood cancer like and also at a certain level and i've said this before like when you're so rich you need tax write-offs right and especially when you're getting famous every agency or manager will sit down with you and say what causes do you care about because they want you to publicly align yourself with causes and i've seen it happen and i don't i don't dislike what it happens it's just i know the origin of it it can come from like very

genuine place when you have a platform and then you have access to be more charitable like i think a perfect example megan markle has cared about things forever she had a fucking blog she's caring about it when she had on instagram and then you know royal family she can care she can when you have resources and access you can like do more with that but like you can be a bad person and still donate money to charity that and if you didn't you're paying that money to the irs right so like i think she does more in charity than some people who just write checks um but you can't denied that it's mutually beneficial for her image as well as for the people that she's helping right i mean this is a woman that was riding around in a limo in new york city saying that she was homeless

when she was just between homes time when she was living in penthouse hotels like this she's out of touch and then is now going after people because and the thing is is that this creator um meredith she is not the only person that said anything about her no she's suing two people i don't know who the i don't i i only know but i'm just saying like yeah she was everywhere on twitter so why i mean on instagram and twitter too um so why are you going after a specific person yeah why you're going after these two people and like imagine if kim kardashian tried to send you a cease and desist like we wouldn't hear the end of it right content for days yeah i think it's like absolutely ridiculous and i'm glad that tiktok lawyers were able to step up because i like literally was like

going to message her and i was like hey i've received a cease and desist before i can give you some pointers some tips i know i've also been threatened with a defamation lawsuit i can and have had to have consult like consults with like lawyers about it um and i can give you some like tips like to eval assess the enemy and assess the threat and like see what this is um but i was like very happy that like people like you know stood up to that because we have a hard time reconciling that rich people will throw their money around as a weapon and it's like well why would they do that if it's not like why would they why would someone threaten that if they like can't prove it and it's like because they're using their money because they know they

can and like a defamation lawsuit you can't win shit you can spend a fuck ton of money she doesn't want to spend that money but she's doing that because she knows she's not going to have to spend and she's also trying to uh set a precedence trying to make people stop talking about her exactly exactly and it's fucked so fuck you bethany yeah i used to really like you too that's the thing it's like she was the underdog everybody was rooting for her and then she just she's just not a good person she sounds like a deeply insecure person when you get when you're that and this is not ageist at all but once you get past your 30s 40s and you're have not worked on your insecurities and you become a deeply insecure person the world treats women

when they get older worse and when you have not processed your own insecurities and you're aging you get more and more angry right and you lash out more because the world is not treating you the way they did when you were like a young thing and then you begin to hate other women to like a different level like it just becomes really fucking intense right so and again speaking of someone who we don't always agree with them but amarosa was once on bethany's uh talk show that her short-lived talk show that she had and if y'all ever want to see someone hand somebody their ass look it up please we should look it up if you haven't seen this before we'll look it up during the break is it gonna be like kiki palmer on wendy williams yeah but even

more because like it'll be even it's just like above bethany and she doesn't even see it oh i like that when she's wrong she's wrong but when she's right she's right yeah yeah and sometimes it's just yeah yeah okay well that is it for our episode we hope you enjoyed again if you want to hear if you want to vote head on over to our instagram tomorrow friday if you're listening to this on thursday and also listen to us read the results on friday in our fisting friday episode fisting all right we'll share some pitches first and for some new names we'll chat and hang out it's if you haven't listened before it's like the extra it's the extra clips from this recording and also we talk more and we like expand on things and we also just like just talk more like it's just

hang out with us a little more on friday so we hope you enjoyed if you haven't followed us on instagram go follow us individually and our joint one as well as our tiktok account and go comment i want you to all think about everyone that you've hooked up with and then that one person that you forgot like you you have to think about that you did it and comment their name i'm obsessed with that yeah i love that i would like to i was gonna say i was gonna shout mine out i don't know his name what the fuck is his name nate that's not right i don't know i don't know college was a blur yeah make up a fake name okay at the end bye we'll circle back next week oh yeah sorry it's fine we'll circle we'll circle back

but am i wrong is a production by me megan rinks and me melissa demont plus diamond imprint productions post-production by coco lorenz and production assistance by melanie d watson