Don't Blame Me! - Brandy's #1 Fans

Episode Date: November 29, 2022

Bouncy houses, overpriced cotton candy cakes, Nature's Cum Shot, mouse traps, Lowe's, The Decedents, Moesha. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

hi everyone welcome i mean you're not gonna know this is take two yeah it is we have sensitive ears and malfunctions but not malfunctions like last week's episode sorry i loved it okay i listened to it in the car ride great yesterday i was coming back from my doctor's appointment and i was like this is funny i like we talk so much that i forget what the fuck we talk about and i was talking about um female centaurs and having like massive jugs and how we need more fantasy creatures that have um juicy tatas yeah juicy tatas and like you know you see like those massive schlongs yeah but then i realized that maybe if y'all listen to uh last week's but am i wrong did it come off a little hypocritical because we were talking about men and their horse

fantasies okay well a centaur is not real no but it's still somebody's fantasy of a horse person mixed together like that also if you watch if anyone has any centaur fantasies and you still have them after watching narnia and mr tom like there's no fucking way like there's literally no way the thing is they can look how you want them to look so maybe that wasn't your type but well i hate you have a different type yeah what was that who played that guy i don't i never saw the movie i read the book and i was like that's enough yeah the movie is trippy i loved the book though like the idea that you could just like walk into a closet and then the other side you're like in a magical land i didn't not try and find portals and wardrobes there's rarely like a book

from my childhood that i was forced to read in school that i actually liked and that was one of them that was a school book for me it was i think like third fourth grade well i have i still i have a copy in the living room i love that book it's so good all the books did you ever see um the i would only say public access television version of the movie i don't know that it was that maybe it was from a major studio but my memory could be wrong but i do distinctly remember as a child watching it and aslan the lion was just a stuffed animal yes i we watched it in school after we finished the book i could watch that one again too that's like those are that was a decent adaptation you know what is actually one of the adaptations that broke my heart because i fucking

loved the book more than anything and that one actually might have been actually i don't know that i read it in school but i was obsessed with a wrinkle in time and i love everybody in that movie i didn't smoke weed for that movie but i felt like someone drugged me when i was watching it like i think that was what you're supposed to feel but i didn't it wasn't a good trip it wasn't enjoy it i'm not gonna talk ill on the movie no well ava i know you're not listening like i love you so much but i just can't decide if i would have been better off if i had smoked weed before i watched it so welcome to our um extra episode what do you want to talk about what did you get up to this weekend what did i do this weekend oh my friends had their going away party oh yes uh

yeah fun but sad fucking bitches leaving i know i know it was did they do like collective like everybody could like shove a pie in their face because i feel like that's what you should have like at a going away party it's they're sentimental like it's sweet but then like you know there's a dunk tank i mean there was a a bouncy house that is fun close enough did you know that you can rent they rented the bouncy house for from i think it was 11 a.m to 6 p.m and it was only 90 dollars melissa i tried to get mods to like rent about bouncy house for me like one year for my birthday i was like i just want that so bad but i couldn't find one that would fit in our backyard i could probably do it now isn't it very slopey though i'd have

to find there's a couple of like flat spots i'd have to like remove the sunshade okay between the house and the garage like that little spot yeah i feel like it could definitely happen there um but i love a fucking bouncy house and i was thinking about you know like here in la personal trainers are very expensive that's like a personal training session what if you just got a bouncy house a few times a week and instead of a personal trainer like think about that no i and like housemates or you could get a hot dog right like i think that's a really good solution and i don't think we're looking to children's birthday parties enough for our our the solution to world or los angeles high cost of living problems yes yes i was on the

freeway actually coming back from the podcast last week next to one of those like i'm not even even call it a food truck because it's way bigger it's like the kind that you see at county fairs that you can get uh funnel cake funnel funnel cake and cotton candy you should all see i'm doing these hand gestures that was something to guess is if it's charades and corn and sodas like it was one of those that had the where this the side of it pops down to have the little you know it looks like a bar kind of thing like the the where you order yeah all of that the entire thing is like written like get your pipe and hot funnel cakes i'm next to it on the fucking freeway and i was like where are you coming from and i was like what must have been like a birthday

party or something like that a wrap party or something yeah but it was it was so themed in like a carnival-y like it was it wasn't one that i've ever seen at any parties now we're out of the uh fair season yeah interesting it felt like it was probably like a children's or someone's birthday party that was a little more themed to carnival fair have you seen this person on tiktok that they are making they call it layered cakes but it's just layers of cotton candy and they're kind of like packing it down and they're selling them for like ninety dollars and people are like this is way too expensive and she's like you don't know the time that goes into it and she literally shows it and she's making it in the same way that you make

a fucking cotton candy thing but just packing it down like and your cost of product is just sugar yeah and i mean she's based here in la what's it called i don't know but i'm sure if we i feel like i look up cotton candy cake yeah that's actually like makes my teeth hurt just thinking about yeah i hate cotton me too i like as a kid i was like i always wanted things that looked pretty like i wanted like that blue bubble gum ice cream all that stuff and i was always fucking disappointed i just wanted aesthetic things that tasted nice and i remember the first time i had cotton candy who was it might have been like misa or someone when we were kids that's what she preferred and we went to the fair and i got my funnel cake and then had like a bite of hers and i was like oh

like this fucking sucks the same thing with like snow cones like unless you like really doubt it with the things that have flavor i was like i don't like this like this actually isn't good i typed it in there's some that pop up they're only 30 dollars but hers were expensive as hell like i understand people spending lots of money um or just more money on have you ever seen those like cotton candy like artwork where it makes it like a big flower i'm like yeah totally also they do that in front of you and it's like benihana like if you're giving me like food and a show i will pay you accordingly like you are also entertainment here like this is you're like doing it with flourishes like you're performing there's an art to that but you're just putting

this in a mold like i can see the seams and not really the good way there's no way people are buying this or at least maybe they're buying it one time but why oh my god imagine just like you go to a child's birthday party and i'd be so disappointed if this was the cake i would be disappointed as a kid without a doubt but even as a parent like yes the sugar myth that it makes kids really hyper like it's not true it's just that it's a scarcity thing like when you don't have something and it's not normal in your life or regular like it becomes when you treat something like a treat it is going to make people like really excited and then yeah you will inevitably crash afterwards because you're expunging expunging spend a bunch of energy all at once

expending spending and but there's still a lot of people who buy into all of that but specifically no one is regularly having a cotton candy cake so you're gonna have that spike in excitement that will go wild and the tea oh my god that just makes my teeth hurt yeah and just somebody accidentally at a kid's birthday party spills a drink it's gone it's gone it's disintegrated that's also the part that i was like what the fuck is this shit where like you put your mouth then suddenly it's gone and it's not like it's like quenching my hunger honestly in another life or in another season of my life having like one of those like little cutesy trucks food trucks for like hiring for like events and stuff for like cute cakes and like

baked goods i'd fucking live for that shit um you and i talked about not making one we well okay let's not get twisted ours was definitely more catered to um working professionals who needed a turkey leg to get through their day it was a turkey leg we were gonna have funnel cakes we're gonna have donuts it was a lot yeah we were gonna go through the streets of la and it was like do you need to eat lunch right now like we're gonna have a corn on a stick wow i miss that we should get back to get to the drawing board for that one and then we also start renting bouncy houses yeah i can't if they're only charging that low price it can't cost that much you know yeah i don't know so you know how you're not supposed to jump on well i learned

this someone told me you're not supposed to like jump on trampolines like like kids and stuff like it's not good for your brain so is it fine for our brains probs right like i don't know i don't i my but like who hasn't jumped on a trampoline so we're all just juices anyway yeah but i mean i guess it's also like kids the the probability that you can like fall off and have like a serious i get that but like what kids aren't jumping on trampolines i jumped on yeah i mean i wanted one i didn't have one but i jumped on other people's but mostly we had sleepovers on them like that is like the pinnacle of middle school to me is sleeping on trampolines and high school did you guys do that no i guess it might be a california thing where a little warm i mean it's

still warm mostly in the south it's still warm yeah in the summertime but no my parents wouldn't have been down for that maybe other people did it but we didn't yeah it was also like when it would be like dewy when you would wake up in the morning and everything's just disgusting i hate that in the morning when the trampoline was just wet and you jump on it and you're suddenly just like cum shot straight to the face yeah and you're like okay i guess it's like it's nature's cum shot maybe don't say that about the children oh okay that is true do period end that topic new conversation do it's nature's cum shot you know because like raining when they say someone's crying

anyways um i cut you off what did you do oh what did i do that's really all i did because that takes a Sunday i slept and caught up on work stuff that's a really long yawn um this weekend we got stuff done around the house like surprisingly a good chunk of stuff done and i'm pretty proud of like all the stuff we're gonna paint our new front we're not a new front door but we're gonna paint our front door um we started finagling more of a a mouse trap is it a rat probably but i don't it's a mouse want to call it that because i have to live i call it as a rat as a joke but they're they're mice well i just don't have nasty rat tills they're mice tills i don't know i can't look close enough like

again like i have to live with this thing until like they like evacuate the dance floor and for my own peace and sanity i need this i'm calling it a mouse they they are i'm just letting you know they are mice because there are people in my dms who are like really adamant on either side like bitch that's a fucking rat no and other people like that's definitely a mouse um we did do so much barricading so they wouldn't come out um turns out there's another opening so we barricaded that and the exterminator comes today oh cool to check out everything turns out we have an attic i didn't know that so when he came the last time he was like do you have one and i was like no like that time when we were looking for mine remember exactly like it was the exact thing

i was like we don't have one he was like but i know how you you have one and i was like oh we don't he was like okay dumb bitch sure i if you don't know where it is then fuck off but i mean he's very kind he wouldn't say that but um i also have a theory that there's like something living up there like a squirrel or something i keep thinking because i hear things but i also know that i have a huge tree there and things are they have cones that are falling but i hear things and i'm like there's something living up there but no it's just the cones falling and the house because la houses don't have insulation everything sounds like it's coming from inside your walls because like the only thing keeping you from outside is your wall like there's really no insulation even

on the roofs so that's what's happening today matz has a half day at work so he's gonna go home and they've been setting traps and stuff but one of the fucking mice i'd like to think there's more than one because i don't want i don't and where there's one there's more yeah and also i was really i i took the borrowers and stewart little and things like that like so seriously that you know stewart little was just a boy that looked like a mouse was that i saw that fucking reddit post and i was like it's not just reddit that's how it is in the book oh that's literally what the book is about a boy that looks like a mouse that's not as touching because what is a boy who looks like a mouse look like like mousy is a term you describe like lots of different people no but

he looks like a legit mouse like does he have a condition where like he has hair oh oh and actually it's more touching if you think about it no no that is totally more touching but like people like oh mousy brown hair like that's like saying like people say which i don't agree with and i think it's it's not used as compliment people like oh sarah jessica parker looks like a horse and so it's like oh look someone adopted a horse girl because they're like that's what i mean like when you're like mousy is a word that you use to describe like a shade of like brown and like like a you got a mousy face you got an angelic face you've got like whatever yeah but okay no this makes yeah a boy that had a condition that made him look like a mouse okay that is more

touching but um in my mind when this was actually about a mouse who like lived with the family i was sad that there would only be one and then he'd be lonely and so i do want there to be more than one but one of them had a fucking mission and we stuffed every like all underneath our cabinets are yeah underneath all of our cabinets which turns out there was like literally nothing behind them we stuffed them all with rags with yeah towels and weights and stuff one of those little bitches chewed a fucking hole out you know i thought that that would happen but i didn't want to frighten you well i will say it was one of matz's corners and i was like we need to roll them to make them like thick you can't have it where if you squeeze your way in you're only

chewing through a layer like this mouse i mean your stomach will explode if you have to eat an entire full-size fucking bath sheet to get out so it was on his corner that he was responsible for and i was like respect the determination though yeah i'm more grossed out by cockroaches because they're less scared of people yeah that's true i got another good picture of the mouse you want to see no okay i'll post on the instagram if anybody cares or i'll post it on my instagram yeah post on your own i won't um sully is that the word i don't know where you're going with like where like um you won't taint yes is that that word okay well that was my weekend so we did our lows or we did our our lows trip and i thought of you as we were walking through all of

the aisles finding everything thank you for your thoughts because you did point out that we go to lows every weekend every weekend and we do and like it's funny like watts even said like i think it was last weekend not the weekend we just had the one before it and he was he put on our weekend plans he's like lows and i was like oh what do we need for low from low so he goes we need stuff from love i was like what is this our new target drill yeah do you need one yeah for what the table and oh yeah desk but i don't know what needs and what screws i need either so do you order online yeah but then i went back to the i ordered it from etsy it was like a custom thing and then i went back today to see what hardware i need and the store's gone now i hate that but also it's been

sitting there for over a year well less than a year i bet you could if you look on your email is there any information i already looked looked everywhere i googled them to see if they had you know website they do but it's not working so i think they're like shut down shut down running from the law let's create that narrative for them they're from florida so maybe oh highly likely yeah so is it just sitting here yeah they're in there can we open it and then i can look yeah and take pictures i i've gotten pretty good at figuring out things i bought a sanding drill bit head so mott's cut these screws for our switch plate covers but when he cut them it kind of pinched them and so now they're like scraggly and won't fit in the holes even though

now the length is fine and so i looked it up and i bought like this sanding drill bit head that i will eventually use to like sand it down and lows though i have to say i'm not a diy kind of person like i'm learning to do this tell me if i'm fucking wrong but that store is not no hardware stores organized none of it makes any fucking sense i think it makes sense to the people that work in the industry that's what i want to know like am i ever going to be like this makes sense to me i don't think so unless you start taking those classes that they offer no we're gonna do them not now we're very busy right now but in the new year well we're taking those classes well then you'll understand then are you gonna not take them with me oh i thought you were

talking about motts no i said we yeah you say we a lot when you mean you and motts no we already talked about i know we did come do this i know we did and like i think you and i will be much better at learning how to make a fire pit he's gonna make a fucking fire i can do that to make fire like when this was your i think this was your birthday a few years ago where we were out and y'all had a fire pit do you still have that fire pit was that your fire pit that was our fire pit um and he was putting paper in there that was coated with something and it was not what we needed no and i was like are you sure and you say yeah and i said okay and it did not did not turn out well no it's like it's there i to have the confidence

that and i mean it's like it's a skill set that a lot of people have where it's just like oh no i've got this i'll figure it out like i know how to do this like don't worry about it julia fox did a tiktok about how she was like i'm always gonna say i know how to do it i'm always gonna say i know i'm pro at it and i'm gonna figure it the fuck out like if jared sleeper said it i would believe him yeah no without a doubt yeah but mods i'm like you own you own too many half zips for me to believe that you can do this yeah but he also just has like the grin and barrett denver kind of kid attitude where like he won't wear a jacket in denver like he'll just be like oh i'm fine in a hoodie and I'm like as you know I've got this this is totally fine I'm like I think that you just

like survived the cold and like all of this stuff like I don't necessarily think you picked up a lot of like the survivalist skills and to thrive in it like you're just fucking you're just grinding through and just like dealing with it I'm like yeah okay okay for sure for sure I told him I was like maybe we should get you some long sleeve shirts for like Colorado so you're not just freezing all the fucking time choked on my own spit i'm sorry i do that all the time me fucking too me fucking too did we watch any oh we did watch some christmas movies again we started we watched the um we have to plan when we're gonna watch holiday yeah when should we do that before next week no before the ninth yeah right yeah that would make sense okay we watched we watched

the kristen stewart one and moths and i have do you ever see that one it's last year oh wait wait wait wait wait wait the one with what's his name in it too yes i did and what's her name as well yes i did watch that how do you feel about the that came that didn't come out last year that was the year before last because i was in my apartment when it came out i don't like when you remind me that so much time has passed yeah that's but like i've told you before i put time stamps on where i'm living and i'm gonna be that annoying bitch next year when i'm like no i was i was in my apartment and like i'm in the house now yeah i watched it with when because it was like during you couldn't go anywhere during the pandemic and you were stuck in colorado and i was

i spent christmas by myself and i had made my lobster and things and watched the movie how do you feel about that movie i don't remember a lot of it but i think from what i remember i wanted i didn't want the people that ended up together together i wanted aubrey and I don't remember which one of them was it Kristen yeah I we re-watched it again and Mott's and I were like I remember like being really angry at this movie like we couldn't remember why and it's because the girlfriend fucking sucks yeah and like she's the worst and I you know I can't begin to understand how hard it is to come out to your family and like that's like the struggle of like the movie but I needed them to have made her a somewhat

redeeming character before it was revealed that like she was not gonna tell her family that they were together and that she like was absolutely horrific and i just spit so much but like horrific in high school to aubrey plaza when they were dating and like outed her to everyone it was like she's a lesbian even though they were together and she couldn't come like i needed them to have made her a somewhat more likeable character before she did these like atrocious things and mox and i the entire time we're just so angry at it i was like why why yeah i don't that i don't yeah i don't remember a lot of the details of it yeah but i fucking love a christmas movie maybe that's what i should write i think we already decided that but did you see i sent it

to you and you might have seen it elsewhere that brandy's gonna be in the descendants movie yeah i got scented about 110 fucking times well i mean it only counts for me though well yeah because we're the only two we're the two biggest fans of the movie like not descent no offense to descendants like never fucking seen descendants but i probably would enjoy it i know that my nieces enjoy it yeah mainly audriana because there's a character named audrey in it and so she dresses hers for for halloween one year i like felt obligated to like meg from hercules because in my mind i was like her full name was megan with an h and i was like this is i'm seeing this is me great perfect i will say i probably would like it because it's a kenny ortega

production yeah and i i love high school musical but what i think it's funny is that people are saying they're like but in the movie her son the person because we haven't seen cinderella the audience hasn't seen cinderella yet and they're like in the movies that have already existed cinderella's son is white and i was like well if you are a fan of the uh original movies you know that this is very possible because somehow a white man and a black woman created a filipino son so when i tell you i that was my first introduction to how genetics work so when i went to sixth grade science class and we're looking at those little squares i was like but no that's actually not how it works because victor garber and whoopi goldberg had a filipino

son and so like you mean to tell me that like that's not what happens like i it truly blew my mind like i like would refuse to accept it also her stepsisters one is white and one is black so we yeah we know how this we we know how this works yes and i just think that if descendants clearly they know what they're doing they cast brandy i need them to cast and i don't want to disrespect this man because i'm so sorry to this man i don't know who this man is i need them to cast her prince charming from the original i believe it's supposed to be because it's they're both disney so i believe that they're it's like cinderella like her cinderella is going to be cinderella so is he going to be the they haven't announced it but i would imagine because he needed

he was so talented he deserved more he still deserves more yeah and i'm like this is a wonderful opportunity i'm like you better fucking cast him first of all stunning gorgeous prince prince charming both of them look the same yeah you could have this could be like a sequel that happened the next day like you same outfits everything and fantastic vocals like so fucking talented like great actor like just like just so good so cast him like if you're not gonna put i mean maybe you don't need another generation like i would love it victor carver and whoopi were in it as well but like at least put him in it

right yeah he's still acting he was in one episode of the blacklist in 2015 he took a break from 2015 to 2020 I like to say that what's his name Paolo Montalban Montalban Montalban yeah he's gorgeous yeah those fucking

cheekbones mm-hmm i've been watching old episodes of moesha for the most part pretty good yeah a lot of let's say about 30 of it does not uh hold up there's a whole episode that i just watched about her saying her butt was too big her butt's about as big as yours so uh so what you're saying is her butt is too like she got voted in school through doorways yeah like she got voted in school for having the biggest butt and i was like come on like let's let's not be mean but also like now that would

be a compliment oh was it not supposed to no no and she was like i read in this magazine that i need to camouflage it by doing this and this and i was like i mean that was definitely of the time yeah it was definitely of the time but also it was not big at all yeah no even at that time no like you've got a big ass right i'd be like oh it's just not true yeah i would check your prescription but okay but for the most part it's pretty good and of course we have shirley ralph playing her stepmom in it oh yeah i need to watch i've never seen it so do we have to watch the descendants like the previous ones i don't know i probably will maybe i'll watch it while i'm home with the children yeah i need like any context i need context but i also like i i don't know that

i am at the place in my life where i'm about to like go watch the descendants solo so like i need to like be like gotcha i need to um hang out with like our our neighbor and just be like descendants should we watch it yeah she's cool her mom brought us over persimmons from her tree delicious i know and a new couple moved across the street and in the house you told me to move into yeah you snooze you lose and mots is like obsessed with them and i'm like are these like your new favorite people but i think he just loves that like we're no longer the newest people on the block yeah and he's obsessed with it and he like kept like loitering outside when we were like getting ready to go to lowe's and i was like well let's just get in the car and go and he goes well

no i just want i want i want you to meet them like i want you to i want to introduce you to them they're like so cool and i was like okay why don't you just take over some muffins or something i know but it was moving day and i was like we're not gonna bother them when the movers are here be so mad me fucking too like especially i was like remember how stressful our fucking moving day was like hell no yeah don't give a shit really i had to give a push notification for ted lasso star jason sudeikis joins the podcast to talk through usa england world cup and makes a bold prediction no thank you like literally stop that's not what news push notifications are for anyways

all right well everyone let us know if we should watch all the descendants how many are there if there's more than three there's no chance i'm watching all three i could do two actually i could probably do three i feel like we have time so you just space them out i mean i think dove cameron has a the she's got like a disney princess voice and she's in that and i also love her fashion and so i would be happy to watch her do that yeah because all the i was when i just typed in descendants but they all of the like press stuff is saying brandy is returning so i'm pretty sure bring paulo back yeah there's descendants then there's descendants two then descendants school

of secrets and descendants wicked world that's a lot and why didn't we get that many high school musical movies there's four already is this all the same kids no offense to these kids at all but i thought part of the reason why disney doesn't do so many sequels to things because are these were decoms right unless the unless this was coming out on yeah disney channel um they usually don't do this many sequels because they like to keep of all the of all the networks the closest that you're going to find someone to playing their actual age is on disney and nickelodeon jason earls aside love him um but they're all getting kind of like aging out of it a good chunk of him so i'm assuming that there's no cinderella already

yeah there's no cinderella but their kid is there the white boy that i said is he already in these yes he's already in them that's what that's why i said that is because he's already been in oh he's already been he's not just cat he's already been in i mean it's a great premise it's like the villains kids and they're just like cunty and singing i've definitely like i'm not gonna lie to you i've watched a couple of music videos online oh there's a tv show too i thought it was just a movie that's what this descendant school secrets is it's okay i'm not gonna watch i'm not gonna watch that oh the fourth film wait is that already out no that's this one right i think this one's the

fourth one it will be strongly inspired by alice in wonderland there's new characters red daughter of the queen of hearts chloe the daughter of cinderella so she's not in it yet so jedediah goodacre is chad charming son of cinderella in french charming i'm sorry you actually could not give me a more accurate like the actor's name is jedediah and he's playing chad charming like that is that is like canon cinderella so kenny ortega is out he's going now it's going to be succeeded by jennifer fang and she did the flight attendant interesting i will say though no shade to disney channel like i love disney channel

but their budgets are known to be notoriously low and i think they put money into this though i i don't disagree with you but i need you to look at this picture of these costumes move it back that is party city like and no shade to the costume department at all but like when you have these like really campy costumes you have to change how you film it like or color the movie like you have to make this i think it is that's what i'm saying i think maybe that's just a bad photo yeah i think like that might be a bad photo but i think the movie itself is colored oh they've got the whitest of the white boy playing jedediah melissa i heard the name jedediah playing chad wow he looks british yes like he looks like that he looks that white like

he looks like white white hey at least we learned how jeans work okay now i want to watch this movie like right now okay all right well we should wrap this up okay everybody we're done bye see you next tuesday oh yeah