Don't Blame Me! - DBM: My Ex's Ex Wants Me w/ Jamila Bell & Mecca

Episode Date: December 12, 2024

The Unhinged and Immoral girls join Meghan and Melisa for this fun episode of Don't Blame Me. This week they're giving advice on: Being perpetually horny Choosing between two girls to date Dating in the friend group Friend always canceling trips Exploring your sexual side when your sibling is your housemate Buy Our New Merch! https://crowdmade.com/collections/sister-sign Follow Jamila https://www.instagram.com/_iamjamila https://www.tiktok.com/@_iamjamila Follow Mecca https://www.instagram.com/meccavellii/ https://www.tiktok.com/@meccavellii Follow Us! instagram.com/meghanandmelisa @meghanrienks instagram.com/meghanrienks https://twitter.com/meghanrienks @sheisnotmelissa instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa instagram.com/diamondmprint.productions Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Elevate your savings with the Scotia High Interest Savings Account. Always earn high regular interest rates that grow the more you save and invest. Conditions apply. Visit scotiabank.com slash H-I-S-A to learn more. Scotiabank. You're richer than you think. Hello, everybody. Welcome to a brand new episode of Don't Blame Me with guests that I don't know that no offense to all of our other guests.

i have not been this excited in so long we have mecca and jamila from there i mean you might have them from tiktok that's where i was introduced you to and you might have heard melissa teasing that she was working with a new podcast that we were pretty geeked about and you guys just started your podcast unhinged and immoral which i have to say is incredibly fitting for you to be here on our podcast where we also identify with that what's crazy is so obviously like we were i was introduced to melissa as like the very organized uh boss producer who was like telling us to do all this stuff and then when she was like can you come on my podcast and i listened to it i said melissa i was like y'all haven't heard y'all have only heard the uh business part of me

straight business with us on our podcast i was like yeah i want to come on here so just imagine before we we have like tons of podcasts together now but like when i initially started this podcast melissa was a producer like she was on this and we were like we had known each other but like professionally so i got this version out of her and i was like cool now you got out of the podcast because now i've been working on you on a on a personal level that we become friends now i need you to get on the podcast and say some wild shit yeah our editor like there's a one of my favorite stories is our editor for the podcast melissa like she talked about she's like you know we're talking we're talking dick we're talking we're talking sex

and she what was it that you said verbatim so we were working on it was lala milan's podcast and um she had asked me or no we were talking about like where we were from we were just meeting and um she had told me that she was from west covina and i was like oh like my crazy ex-girlfriend she thought i was talking about the city and women yes and fucking women i was talking about the tv show so the entire time she's editing our podcast she goes damn this girl is a lesbian and she is pretending to be straight and like sucking and fucking on this podcast like that's great she has a whole girlfriend like that's crazy and then we had to tell her it was so fucking funny no i can only imagine that's like yesterday when we were recording i was like oh yeah melissa's

off the wall because remember she corrected us she was like exhibitionist right because why do you know that i was gonna say that like no she comes out with the vocabulary and i'm like okay i actually don't know this part of your life like tell me more about this side sorry i i'm a a ball of secrets until it comes out exactly she's she's an aquarius if you believe anything about oh that tracks that really does yeah what's your guys got it i'm an aries i love an aries i'm a gemini oh my god wow i i'm a leo so i obviously my brother and dad are leos i would say my brother's a leo too yeah we all we flock together and i did also we found out our company is called sister sign because uh leos and aquarius's are like the true sister sign oh that's i love that so well

thanks we thought on it for so goddamn fucking long that's so crazy eminem was already taken and we were like we can't be evidence because candy and white rapper were screwed so like what are we gonna do it was great but yeah so i guess to enter the podcast for you both and everybody who might be listening for the first time or not for the first time we're gonna give some wonderful amazing life-changing advice i love that it's always unhinged and immoral but now it's like trademark unhinged and immoral as well so if you want to call you can leave a voicemail 310-694-0976 international listeners send an audio message to meganpodcast.gmail.com or you can dm us 18 and over have your parents permission and under three minutes for the recorded voice versions

under 300 words tell us how old you are not just that you're over 18 but if you're 19 versus 35 it matters very different advice it totally matters so much it means everything and people don't do this one and i really wish they would but like when you are trying to justify being with like the worst possible human in the world romantically tell me who would play them in a movie because i could understand your point of view a bit more that's good i remember that you know if it's non-descripting you tell us that he's the white michael b jordan my god got it okay so mildly attractive but has a weak chin okay is that what that means because when i tell you melissa and i sat on it i go who the fuck is a white michael b jordan

no he's not do you get him no but yeah he's mid-tier fine he's fine he's as in like i'm not like i'm not drooling exactly but i but i get it i'm actually on my hands and my knees like i'm like no no i am too i met him one time and the words out of my mouth were and he puts his hands on my back he goes thanks so much and i was like oh so he knows no no he has dimples so obviously dangerous yeah so i've loved him since i was a preteen and he was like a pre like i have loved him my whole life how long have you been keeping up with him because my mom used to watch All My Children and he played

Jack's adopted son Reggie when he had some straightbacks and he was on the wire during that same moment in time. I was going to say, during the wire. That's how long I've liked him. That was playing on my house when I was a kid and from that moment on, he was always on my radar, in my orbit, and

I... I definitely understand why Lori was with him. Yeah. We can't... Her roster's fire. She has great taste. yes oh we have nothing wrong with her and i would love to to speak with her without a doubt i have to say though when when she was dating him i suddenly was like oh he is a little bit cringy and i said i just don't i don't want to know more about this because i want to be oblivious

because she's so cool calm and collected yes and he's a nerd and he's kind of nerdy yeah and everyone's like how did she fumble him and i said she did not you know what's crazy okay maybe for sure backtrack because when I said he was mid-tier fine I was literally thinking of Lori's roster of men who she's been with and of all of her dudes I would put him at the least fine I'm not saying he's not fine he is

fine but if you're looking at her track record it's like well the soccer player she was with was way cute what is his name everything she does she's really good I mean even future is really attractive in the face well you lose me there

well it's a good face isn't that Meryl Streep's face yes but in like African American and you're not attracted to Meryl Streep that is the one though that is my favorite celebrity doppelganger because I was like two separately very attractive people

it's the eyes they look Robert Richard is that the one from the doctor show Arnaz or one on one and the white man that one is scary that got to be his daddy it has to be

yeah those eyes and he already looked biracial so i'm just gonna say it's his dad he could really do it his dad you guys know he's a crip and he literally got the part of 101 because he was running from a game running from bloods he was in blood territory i saw that he went into a yeah he sat in a um acting and then he he pulled the flag out his pocket during the interview he's like a real crip he's crazy and i i don't know i love it got the job i was gonna say that i like that about you i've always liked you but now you're not goofy you'll really shoot somebody all right okay um before we get into it i have to say two things one mecca you and i are both from the bay area oh really what well i'm from sacramento but i was born i was born in the bay

and we moved to sac when i was five i don't like doing that because you know that's like a thing like oh i'm from the bay and i was gonna say i love that you said let me preface that sack now but not and thank you because you've got a people who are like oh yeah i love the bay area sacramento and i'm like yeah no but it's uncommon knowledge okay living outside of california now people really do say oh when you say sacramento the bay area and that's always a correction what city are you from pleasanton i grew up in marin but okay so i want to give the precursor i didn't grow up with marin money i always have to say for people they're like oh you're one of those marine girls I was like, no, no, no.

Marin's a rich city. Yeah. No, it's incredibly rich. I think that's where my Girl Scout camp was. Camp Mincy's, if I'm not mistaken. Maybe. Somewhere up there. Probably.

Yeah. My dad bought that. He bought a plot of land in the 70s. He's very old. And he's like a communist Bernie Sanders. He like knows Bernie Sanders. He's like that guy. So I didn't grow up with Marin money.

Our dads might know each other. My dad was like a panther and all that shit. Well, he was a cook by trade, but that's his age range. and he was outside he got stabbed with the watts riots oh i feel like my dad probably does know him yeah yeah he does a thing he does a um like youth criminal justice has a whole system there so like if you get like oh yeah if you get caught by the cops doing like anything or even like your school he has like contracts at like all of the middle schools and high schools in marin and then also other places in the bay that like they'll get sent to him instead really really tampered with

my dating life though if that was really tough they're like wait i think i know your dad and i was like no so that's why i have a hyphenated last name but i cut the second part off because i said no that's fun i love that the second thing i have to bring up is in your relationship you one of you is someone who passes out and the other is someone who has to catch you have the same thing when i tell you i first of all i i got you guys so what's crazy is that was right after we got done like recording the podcast melissa said in the video that y'all had just you only had one drink i was like y'all were drinking that morning i saw that and i was like no i'm not here melissa at the restaurant she had one drink i didn't even finish the drink at the restaurant like no you didn't

probably okay i was just you know it was just a little hot more than i anticipated yeah no so that is like to a t and i saw it on my for you pitch so i gave you the money because i rewatched about nine times and i walked out of the room and i like came back and i'm still playing and i was like i have to bring this up because famously it's a part of like my lore our podcast lore our friendship lore um was that i'm like a fainter and i tell people that but like you know it rarely comes up like i fainted it like black friday brandy millville when i was in high school like woke up to like someone handing me granola barbie like so sorry about that but like in melissa's friendship it hadn't really come up like as it happened um and i was doing my hair one day how

many years ago is this like four five maybe four five and I had I used to wear a bunch of rings and I ran my hands through my hair I have two cartilage piercings and they needed to be switched out because like they had stopped swelling and so there's a little bit of space and so you have like a little knob a little nozzle at the end of it yeah it gets caught I don't realize and I just pull out and it gets lodged inside of my ear not all the way through inside of my ear and it's like the rush of pain, I text Melissa and I go, hey, no rush, no worries. Whenever you're ready to come over here, if you could just help me out with a little real quick. And she was like, I'm already outside parked in my car waiting for you to text me because she's early and I'm always

late. And I was like, perfect. I will come down and get you. And I literally like scooted on my bug. So I can't stand up. I'll hit the floor, scooted all the way down, unlocked it. And she's like, OK, you know, I have my first aid training, like we're going to clean this. She's got everything and i'm like sitting there and she just tells me like okay i'm gonna i'm just i'm just gonna i'm gonna try and get it out she gets probably six inches closer to my ear not even touching my ear and i go no hold that thought i i think i'm i think i'm gonna hold on can you get one second the warning like put a pin in that cause 28 seconds no exactly and i was like i'm gonna barf and as they're walking to get me the bucket i said actually no no it's actually not

i'm gonna pass out right now and i passed out first time i've ever had i'm sitting there holding her neck she's waiting on um who are we waiting on nicole byer nicole byer was coming i love nicole byer that's so random and that's like the perfect person to have after you fake she's hilarious i was like we can't reschedule we'll just have to push her we can't reschedule because she was like are you good but so it was the first time ever i had a what is it a cynoscope a syncope how do you say but it was the first time i ever had a convulsive one so i was convulsing those scare people i'd be like my sister has seizures so i wake up i wake up to the fire department being there and the first thing i say is melissa not quietly i think i

peed my pants will you check and she was like you didn't oh you had a full attack okay yeah it was horrible but literally when i saw the tiktok i was like oh my god this is i could not believe I actually caught it on camera because again I this is not the first time Jamila's fainted I also used to faint but like it was more so brought on by if I had been smoking weed and drinking yes that's a big reason why I stopped smoking weed is because I would faint remember I fainted at that sigma party just like I hit the grass like that and I just told her get up she was like did you just fucking faint and I was like yes like what so I completely I don't smoke wait anymore but jamila will kind of just fall out like she did i did think she was playing that's

why i was like i can't just post this because i have to give like the whole background because the other part like i said the waiter was also standing in front of us like he was standing and you can hear him in the back uh that's 132 dollars and the way she did it she said hold on hold on because he was asking us do you guys want to split it yeah and she goes it's just like when stuff like that happens like everything needs to pause yeah it's just like he was like these bitches are trying to run up on the tap thinking like she's fainting i was like oh just here's my car like and he's like is she okay and i was like yeah that was really insane it's funny because it's like usually because i've just i'm so used to it now i usually can catch myself before i like

completely lose consciousness but i was already sitting down there was nothing i could do so it was just like for your legs to go your legs can't go up your top half's going down like the amount of times i've had to just be like oh hold that thought i have to get fully horizontal on the ground and they're like what's up i'm like just let me nod in and out for like five minutes yeah and i'll be good yeah yeah so i really just feel connected as a fellow fainter yeah wow yeah i love that it's traumatizing for other people yeah they were in those comments like mecca was so chill she didn't give a fuck i was like she just be fainting i was like okay well yeah i prefer people not to freak out actually right no yeah it's just because also i

can't do anything about it and if you're asking me questions like i can't respond and they're like well what's wrong and i'm like okay i can't say anything and now they're like oh she's dying i'm like i'm not but like i need you to just i need to stop i do love fainting in a medical setting though when you're in a chair oh the attention the way that they will literally flip you upside down and wake you up with the snickers and a cup of like like sugar water and i'm like oh my god thank you it happened to me pregnant while i was at an appointment i was never treated so nicely in my life yes every time i go to uh i got my nose done like years ago but every time i go to like get botox or like anything they'll put me in the big room with the chair that goes upside

down because they know it's gonna happen and then you just like wake up and you're like oh okay thanks like the air conditioning sounds like a good hack i don't know i like that right yeah i'm i'm a big fainter it's only gotten worse but that's fine anyways um yeah so let's give some advice to people and um solve some problems or make them worse let's do it all right first up we've got a write-in hey ladies i'm 28 she her and i'm perpetually horny not in a that i'm a sex addict but if i see someone i want to fuck i'll fuck them safely i want to slow down and get into a serious relationship but i can't see myself being tied to one person while my heart and upper lips say they want monogamy my lower lips are telling a different story

how do i get both of my flappers to speak the same language what a poet i was gonna say does she write or the person right i mean wow i'm gonna take that upper lips and lower lips i mean you're 28 like do you feel like you need to get married today like i don't feel like you need to slow down just yet i mean instead of turning like 28 it's like people start getting like oh what are you looking for in life like right like you're it doesn't sound like you ever are gonna slow down but i mean i was gonna say get you a couple of boyfriends or girlfriends it seems like you mess with them all right like girl i don't know like you really want to slow down it's not but i mean it sounds like you've had a time you know every time i hear a girl making like this grand post

of like i think it's time i go celibate i'm always asking myself what was you doing that was so goddamn nasty that you said i need to take a break i need to slow the fuck down so that's what i'm hearing that's what that's what i'm hearing your letter oh you you you you had a good time this year right yeah i think the idea of like wanting to be like monogamous or whatever like if that's like what you want i think of it the same way it's like when i was like i don't know if i'm ever gonna get married not because i'm like fundamentally against the idea of marriage but i'm like i've just never fucking met someone that i want to marry so like until i meet them i'm not about to just marry anybody so i think it can be the same thing if you want to be monogamous

you should be with someone who actually makes you want to be monogamous and if it's like that's not the vibe immediately or like after a little while then maybe that's the sign that it's not the right one because i'm fucking around all the time as long as and then when i meet somebody i want to be in a relationship i'm with them and then when i'm not i'm back to fucking around like right do you i don't know see that's why i feel like this is gonna sound a little pessimistic i don't think there's necessarily anyone who's gonna make you want to be monogamous i think that has to be like this person who who like okay i'm at this point in my life where that's what i want for myself but it sounds like you don't maybe actually want that for yourself i think people are telling you

society right now because if you're like if you're moving like that and you're good with it and you're up to this point you're 28 we're the same age yeah as a former fucker around her uh i mean i've only really slowed down but i haven't stopped no for real and i feel like if you're at the point where you're like oh i just really need to do this you're gonna do it like in a non like sincere way and you're gonna regret it because then you're gonna like force yourself to like oh let me settle let me settle down with this nigga you're doing it like immediately right it's like girl yeah don't you probably don't need to yeah if you don't want to like i think like you meet the person that you're like oh i want to do

this but if you don't meet the person if you're having fun and you're enjoying everything who who told you you had to do this part like who said like it's time yeah i don't know do you want to listen which lips do you which lips do you prefer which lips do you want are more powerful right but but also if you're doing it right both lips should be they should be a lot they should be aligned in the sexual way both lips should be busy they both should ring ring that yeah i i think that have fun until it's not fun anymore like i think that's kind of like isn't like old you know it's just like grown i feel like i just started getting shit figured out like i truly feel 18 no shade i

truly feel like the same exact way inside that i feel obviously like my mindset has changed by shit but like i feel the exact same way i did when i was 18 like girl i don't know like i'm even i you know even though i have a kid i'll be looking at him like well now who who let me do that what's going on with that over there i don't know so girl keep fucking i don't know it's fun have fun until it's not fun that's my my i don't think fucking will ever not be fun exactly exactly that keeps you alive real spell that and like those old ladies who say like how did you stay alive to like 112 and they're like a diet pepsi every single day and lots of dick and i didn't get married and i fucked around that's literally always a story they always say the same shit so

right i don't know do you want to right you might be one of those chronically single aunties but like always have a nigga you know like this is my friend this is my friend i love calling a nigga my special friend it's so grown it's like what is a boyfriend a little friend i'm not calling no man my boyfriend that's childish yeah i got a little friend i love that we're going on our break and we'll be right back This episode is brought to you by Accenture. When your advertising operations fall out of sync, everything else follows. Spotify and Accenture are working together to reinvent the rhythm of ad sales.

Using automation, analytics, and smarter workflows to simplify campaign delivery and access better data across the business. The result? Less time spent on operations, more time connecting brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most. Learn more at Accenture.com slash Spotify. Hear that? It's your money calling. It wants a promotion. Elevate your savings with the Scotia High Interest Savings Account. Always earn high regular interest rates that grow the more you save and invest.

Conditions apply. Visit ScotiaBank.com slash H-I-S-A to learn more. ScotiaBank. You're richer than you think. we are back from our break and let's get into the next one hey megan hey melissa hey mecca hey jamila i'm calling in for advice on my current dating life i'm a 25 she her and i'm finally in a place to start seriously dating for the first time long story short in early october i'm after this girl we'll call her giselle 26 and we started talking we were talking over snapchat which i

didn't mind at first, but because messages disappear, it caused a lapse in conversation, and I wasn't a fan of that. I ended up messaging her and telling her I would like to keep talking to her, but I would like to move away from Snapchat. I gave her my number, and at the time, she never ended up texting me back, so I moved on and started talking to other people. I matched with someone else on a dating app, let's call her Allura23, and we started chatting for about a week and a half. Although I wasn't as excited about her as I was Giselle, I was giving it a try. She ended up mentioning that she had complimented me at a beauty supply store a couple of months prior, which I thought was cute. Fast forward to earlier this week, I get a message from Giselle on a Facebook dating, and she sends me a message giving me her number,

and she explained to me that during the time when we weren't talking, life got chaotic for her, and her tendency is to isolate, and that was the reason she never reached out. During this time, Allura was busy and hadn't responded to me for a couple of days. I decided to give Giselle the benefit of the doubt, and we've been texting back and forth over the past week. Conversation is going really well. There's a good balance of still getting to know each other and flirtation, and I'm starting to get excited to see where things go. Then, a couple days after Giselle and I started talking again, Allure responded. Now I feel like I'm at a crossroads.

I feel bad completely ignoring Allure because although I did have a good time talking to her, I just don't feel the same spark that I feel when I talk to Giselle. I don't think I'm a person who can talk to multiple people at a time. I'm a hopeful romantic, and I have ADHD, so giving romantic energy to more than one person is just not on the cards for me. I see things going well with Giselle, but I don't want to put all my eggs in one basket and end up getting hurt or hurting someone else. Any advice y'all want to give me, whether it's practical or moral, whatever,

I'm ready for it all. I love y'all so much. Thanks for listening. Bye. I was going to say, is Giselle a stud? That's a good thing. She's a new game. these are very hot girl names

first of all that's always have the most girliest names that start right there listen so first things first it definitely sounds like a baby gay

because you're very one thing I do know is lesbians my sister is a les and so I know all of their teeth we bring her up every time we talk

I have to I have to use my resources okay these are my sources I have to cite my sources I can tell you first things first Giselle is a stud

and she's playing the fuck out of you because why are you communicating on snapchat that's the red flag number motherfucking one and she's giving you breadcrumbs and she's trickling you along and she knows you're a baby gay and she's like oh i'm gonna get you and you think you're gonna fall in love with me because that's

what those are really good at doing they're so good at making you fall in love you're like i've never had anybody pay attention because you were used to dating niggas so now you switched over to the girls and you're like oh this is so much fun and so she's gonna trick you and you're gonna fall into her spell and she's gonna leave you high and dry

because if that was really your lady y'all would have been living together already and to this person i already said this to you when you dm me a question about that before and that's what they do they love to like disappear and they come back to me like oh wait no i was just dealing with so much you know that's nigga shit you should be used to that you know what that is that's play by play if somebody ain't damn that i don't give a damn to be honest yeah Send me the pamphlet, the obituary. Tell me how this went. Even if someone passes away.

Even then. Because you can say, give me some time. I just need to. You don't just disappear. And so you ask the question, I can't talk to multiple people at one time. I got ADHD. Figure it out. Talk to both of them.

That was going to be me. Girl, we need to get that figured out. You need to figure that out. You need to figure that out. Don't take your meds. And I promise you can do both. Hold up. I was going to say, I don't like to multitask now because I'm older.

but that used to give me a rush like I used to love texting 17 people at once like that was great I if I'm texting okay I'm engaged now like I love him I don't do this anymore just as a disclaimer but like I was like all or nothing either like I'm like I'm not talking to any of you or if I start talking to one person I go actually make it six more like I can't do just one at a time so like don't take your meds and like multitasking is like where you thrive you get that high off of that and I think like as long as you're not like meeting up with them because I if it's a small town and you're like everybody knows each other I think it's sticky exactly if you're like texting you're messaging but I have another question about Facebook dating is this a

thing I've been on Facebook dating you have I I've been a dating app queen in my day first of all I was also a theater minor for sure a dating app queen I was a theater minor I would play a different character for each man like i would just be like who do i want to be it's fun this is i'm a method actress facebook dating is for older people though and i guess a certain at least where i was living because i was on facebook dating when i moved to houston as when i was on it and it was a very niche population exactly the people who you would think would be on facebook dating yeah we're on facebook dating if you're but she's also a baby gay in a small town so i can understand her being on an app yeah well i'm like wondering like why if you said the if you sent your number

on snapchat to her and then she never replies and then finds you on facebook date she still has you on snapchat yeah like why do we not why didn't she just came she literally just came across she was just like oh i'm a friend about this bitch let me that's what i'm thinking let me run she's got a roster exactly i was gonna say yeah you need a good one because the number disappeared on snapchat you know how it and i know exactly what it is the only reason you feel like you want to give the other bitch a chance you feel like you don't have that spark giselle is finer than the second i i get it so you're distracted talk to both of them compare and contrast think of it as exercise you must compare and contrast because you're gonna be like i don't

know but this bitch is really nice and giselle really only hit me up when you'll start to get some patterns the muscle will never get strong if you don't exercise it in practice yes exactly right and i also think it is a rite of passage to kind of get fucked over at a certain point like if like crucial for character development yes if you withhold yourself from like your earnest like true genuine instinct is to be like i still really want to talk to this person even though even though i know they're going to hurt me okay if you don't do it with them you're going to do it with the next person so like get it out of your system figure out like learn the lesson now or prove us all wrong but like if you withhold all of that you're just gonna end up with like

the wrong people and miserable crashing out is essential for in life like you have to crash out sometimes yeah but i'd rather be the person that is fucking them over than to get fucked over yeah yeah you're playing chess but we're playing checkers right hey i think i think have fun and if you limit yourself now i kind of agree with you you already would have moved in together at this point if this was like your one true love immediately and like continue on with the plot like make it you need a little more you need more storylines a little you have another person in there honestly let's get another i know yeah make it interesting make it interesting and where did you meet this other person in the hair store were y'all buying bonnets did your hands grace what was

happening oh me too what edge control do you use i use this one yeah the one beauty supply in your small town because everyone gotta go there of course she's in there yeah of course i think i also feel like what's the likelihood that these two the two uh what was it alora and giselle that they know each other as well oh in a small town lgbtq yeah they probably do honestly yeah maybe it's gonna get real interesting for you actually yeah don't type out now like no stay in the thick of it vibe just my twin into the thick of it literally we missed that sound okay we're gonna do the next one it's a write-in hey megan and melissa and jamila and mecca i am 22 she her My friend, who I wouldn't consider a close friend, but we're in the same friend group,

started dating my boyfriend from high school a couple years ago. At first, I was pissed at her, but I got over it quickly after I moved on with someone else. Then someone else. Then someone else. The longer I saw them together, the more I thought they belonged together. But then they broke up, and now my friend is saying that she has feelings for me. I think I could be into her, or I just want to spite my ex, but I don't really know. Part of me just wants to do it for the story and see how it plays out, but should I go for it?

I'm not looking for anything serious, and I don't think she is either. oh that's fun well I wasn't expecting that that was a plot twist right oh okay well that would be easy at friend gatherings right they could just go home together after the party I say go

forward for the plot but don't get serious 22 yeah that's some young shit but don't be serious because as soon as you get serious that's when it gets messy the friend group starts to break up but do a little fling do a little here do a little there something that's fun if you're still in the friend group like 10 years from now and it's like you

only know if you've been friends with y'all for that decade like oh you know they used to fuck around yeah back in the day most friend groups have you know we have i mean we never actually fucked but it's like you know he used to be in love with mecca back in the day like it's like we all know and it's like every now and then we'll be shady and just kind of like yeah every now and then something will happen when it's like oh yeah i forgot you did used to love i also think that like if you i would be incredibly flattered if like you started dating my ex and then was like actually turns out i don't like you i like what she did to you and now i actually want to go to her like did you give him like a crazy good glow up like what about that like is she

using you like what is that uh bella porch song build a bitch like is she using you like help me give that glow up like that you gave him or whatever that is and like if you're fine being used as like a a tool to progress forward that's fine but also like right kind of fun and where is this man is this man in your friend group he can't be at this well maybe he was you know when he was dating the other i was gonna say she said from high school so i think maybe it's just like they probably all know each other but yeah like he's outside of the group and they're still young enough that high school i was like what but then i was like oh she's 22 yeah i also didn't go to college so for me high school is always my reference like oh yeah i dropped out i didn't

really go to classes i was enrolled i went there for a minute riverside so that's fine yeah no but uh i was gonna say though if you want to hook up with anybody else in the friend group i would tread carefully like if you want to do it for the plot like that's totally fine but if you like have had a crush on somebody else there's a limit yeah there might it might have like a ripple effect to have like someone else that you're like well i actually really like this person but like i don't yes we're in a wrong place wrong time or they're in a relationship or whatever yeah it will your friend group will know and if you're cool with that that's totally fine if it won't have any consequences but if you like have a crush on someone else or like anything just know that it

might limit and like sure there's definitely a fucking friends limit you can't just be having sex with everybody in the friend group isn't it's an origin one and a half limit not a friend group then you need new friends like you're it's it's gonna start getting real messy because somebody else is starting to think too yeah yeah that's an organization unless that's what y'all want to turn your friend group into because then y'all can get to swinging and doing pineapples exactly there are a lot of friend groups that do that too there are there are and so you might be the ones that's kicking it off for the plot yeah right that's so yeah that's high school to me i and as an adult not so much but high school everybody was small town swipping and swapping yeah mingling

exactly okay we're going on a quick break and we'll be right back Hear that? It's your money calling. It wants a promotion. Elevate your savings with the Scotia High Interest Savings Account. Always earn high regular interest rates that grow the more you save and invest. Conditions apply. Visit scotiabank.com slash H-I-S-A to learn more.

Scotia Bank. You're richer than you think. we are back from our break and we're gonna get into the next one hey megan and melissa you're the best my question is about my friend emily we've been friends since childhood and are both 30 i consider her a good friend and almost like a cousin we share a lot of the same experiences hanging out a few times a year but we aren't up to speed on all the details for years emily has had a habit of initiating a trip and then ghosting me or whoever else is involved. Trips to England, Japan, New York City. None of it ever went anywhere despite a few weeks of her picking

hotels and asking for opinions on activities. I used to get very sad when things would fall apart. It feels important to note that I am on the autism spectrum and I thought these plans were sincere. Once I thought that Emily didn't enjoy planning despite saying she did and secretly wanted someone else to do it. So I took charge. We went to Mexico and got into a fight because she didn't want to go but felt like I was pushing her. After that, I learned my lesson and was just vague when she would bring up a trip and eventually she'd let it go. The pandemic slowed it down and she started again and I'm tired of it. It's easier to play along because she's very sensitive, but it feels like mine and I really dislike it. She usually sets them for next year, so I can't really say

budget as a reason i know emily is in a lot of credit card debt so she might fight me on that also it's just kind of annoying that we're still pretending these trips would ever even happen help she's broke i was gonna say you you told us yourself what she ain't got the money manifesting yeah and i think that she does i think that she is genuinely wanting to go on these trips and i do think that she genuinely wants it to happen but i it's very obvious that she's broke because that's what broke people do like oh yeah we're gonna do all these people and it's always for next year because they think i'm a i'm a bunch of this i'm that and then she don't have the money and that's why she was mad at you when y'all went to mexico because she had all got their money

she she used all her money like we have to pay for the atvs and she said no i don't i don't have it probably that's their mom and that's fine when i play plan trips when it's group trips i just plan my stuff separate i'm gonna go regardless and if you show up you show up i think the big thing is you have to find a group of people who are reliable to travel with i don't just travel with everybody to be honest like i have a set group of friends and we've been traveling since our early 20s together so i know when we plan a trip at this point like these people are one serious i know we're gonna want to do the same things because i need the other thing when you go on group trips are you more of like a relaxer or do you want to do um right excursions excursions

because if you someone who want to get in with the locals and act like you from that city versus someone who want to just chill at the resort you're gonna have some tension during that trip you need to figure that out yeah and also maybe this is just not a friend that can travel like i just feel like you don't have to travel with somebody to be their friend so maybe just ignore her like why you don't just like the message right okay you gotta you have to be like okay girl you know how sometimes your friends just will just do shit and you gotta like okay girl uh yeah like that message and just like don't take it personal and don't take it seriously until she says like hey i just booked this until she a bitch say she books and shit ignore her ass and then

maybe y'all just need to be facetime buddies maybe y'all need to go to dinner maybe she'll if you ignore it yeah well i also think like you taking on the responsibility of being like oh well and then i realized she actually doesn't want to plan it so like that's why i planned mexico i'm like maybe she is building a pinterest little dream board in your chats and you just like thumbs it up and like it like she might just enjoy like building a like a sims house like she might not want to buy the house like she's having fun planning all of this she's planning yeah like she's planning her like hypothetical thing and like she you are the you're the pinterest board like she's just putting your text instead and so like i think like liking it or being

like oh my god gorgeous like that looks so fun right there i don't think there's any harm in that as long as you know that like it is not probably ever going to come out of the group chat and like i don't think she has the intention of that so i think if you both know that that's kind of what that is you take trips with other people and if she gets mad at you for taking trips with other people that's like a whole different thing i was gonna say then you can boom but i also doesn't think it means that she hates you like because she broke and she can't go on the trip or she just don't i feel like this person said they were on the spectrum though that explains a lot because actually a lot of people like do shit like that like oh let's go do this

and they have no intention on ever actually doing it like that's quite regular yeah i low-key do that i was gonna say like we do that kind of a lot sometimes i don't know just be like okay girl that looks so fun emily yeah but saying that you're on the spectrum makes sense because i know a lot of times y'all take literal super literal so it's like that totally makes sense so sometimes you gotta take a step back and be like okay like just remind yourself like okay sometimes people just say things sometimes people just say things and then just kind of go from there yeah and until they do something they just said it that's it and it's like we all say shit smoke ass yeah this would drive me crazy though because i tend to be kind of literal and i'm like

okay at this point like what do you mean like okay are we are we yes or no but i'm also very straightforward so i would have been like are we actually trying to plan this or no because like i'm happy if you want to make a vision board for like a vacation like that's fun i'm here for that but like if i'm now looking at airbnbs like am i wasting my time or not so i don't think there's anything wrong with also being straightforward back yeah for sure but yeah this might not be a travel friend it's not giving travel it's not it's giving thoughts yeah just giving thoughts and vibes yeah storytelling no praise just thoughts this happens to my fiancee all the time with golf trips yeah he golfs and um everybody will like be like want to do a trip

and he'll like plan the whole thing and they're like oh my god fine like let's do that and he's like let's book it and they're like whoa whoa whoa yeah hold on no no no like we just said we we're gonna book it like what do you guys think it would be but he's like what the fuck are you talking about i mean the amount of times he's like literally priced out has all he works in finance he's got like all these fucking google docs with all of this shit he's a capricorn baby sauce oh yeah well that doesn't all of them everything is capricorn and he literally has like seven different ones of being like international domestic west coast east coast south like all of these different ones he's like pick one pick a plan and they're like oh i i don't

think i actually want he's like yeah and honestly me as a gemini when they start doing that it makes me into i don't okay i don't want to do it anymore you're too excited you're too technical you're too organized and you're you actually just made me so overstimulated by giving me opinions and thoughts and and suggestions and lining this out ah i don't know so that's why when i plan a trip people give their thoughts i say okay that's what y'all are doing this is what i'm doing and if you want to come and come like i'm booking my own room i'm booking my own flight we don't have to book anything together right but if i see you there cool right but his solution he found like these like um like trips that these coordinate like these coordinated trips you can go on as a solo

person so like he can go do those golf trips and then like he'll have friends who come along or he's like met people there good for him and i was like oh my god so fun and i did vet the company first because i said what do you mean this is a golf trip company and they do try and hide it because they don't their audience is very conservative they are like raging liberals but they hide it because they're like we can't we don't we can't these these we still want your money yeah we want the republican money um but uh i think especially like going at like on those trips like yes it's fun to like travel alone there's like a a whole other like as a woman like a whole other like safety aspect so like finding like group trips that you don't have to

like be friends with these people to go on a trip with them and like pursue traveling and then you make friends with other people who you know already like traveling and then you can travel with them yeah i've seen people that do that like in groups on tiktok they have yeah it's becoming more widely known kusi's a big solo traveler she goes all around the world she is she'd be everywhere for like weeks by herself i couldn't i hate being alone i need an audience i don't need an audience but i would like an audience i would prefer an audience i have to talk to somebody I cannot be alone I hate me I spiral like it's like yeah I don't like to be alone at home but everywhere else like I have and I have huge social anxiety like girl I need a party I

need a I need a buddy partner please yep I'm the exact same way and I also I want someone to be at my home but I also don't necessarily want to talk to you and I want to do my own thing but I also want to know that there's a body a little energy we're gonna take a quick break and we'll be right back. This episode is brought to you by Accenture. When your advertising operations fall out of sync, everything else follows. Spotify and Accenture are working together to reinvent the rhythm of using automation, analytics, and smarter workflows to simplify campaign delivery and access better data across the business. The result? Less time spent on operations, more time connecting brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most. Learn more at Accenture.com slash Spotify.

Hear that? It's your money calling. It wants a promotion. elevate your savings with the scotia high interest savings account always earn high regular interest rates that grow the more you save and invest conditions apply visit scotiabank.com slash hisa to learn more scotia bank you're richer than you think we are back from our break and we're gonna get into another one hi guys um been listening for a couple years now but first i'm calling in so i am 25 years old recently turned 25 to hear pronouns and i'm in a weird spot right now so i recently well not

really recently but I was dating a girl for about a year and a half two years and we cut things off in February which turned into us really like talking and not really cutting things off until maybe like the summertime so this is like the first time that I'm like single single and actually looking for like more like the hookup side but the problem here is that I live with my brother So we live in this townhouse, it's a really nice townhouse, but he's, like, my brother, and he's, like, a year younger than me, and I just don't know how to invite guys over, or girls over, because I'm pansexual, so I just don't know how to feel comfortable inviting people over to my space that is also his space, and then feeling comfortable, like, fucking with him in the room over, I don't really know. But I just want to know, like, what are your guys' opinions on how to be more confident exploring, like, my side of myself while having a roommate who happens to be your brother and all the implications that come with that? Like, I don't really want to hear him. I don't want him to hear me having sex, and, like, I don't necessarily want to have to, like, introduce him to the people or whatever, because I'm not looking for anything serious right now, but I'm definitely looking for, like, a fling.

Like, I want to get my goonies beat. I don't know. but yeah any advice you can kind of give or like any insight would be great for me i would love to hear your opinions or even like if other callers or listeners have any like opinions because i would love to hear like their mindset against this but yeah thank you you guys have a good one very formal um and now this is my time to shine i used to live with my brother this is a fun problem yeah girl simply just uh you kind of got to get over it you guys are grown yeah um i will say um i've posted my brother on tiktok his name is derrington he's an absolute

nutcase so i my energy was definitely matched um i will say he was going crazier than i was but who did it first derrington okay yeah i was gonna say someone has to definitely someone someone has to break the seal break the seal so that is the thing i will say once he broke the feel i felt way more like relaxed in terms of okay um i can bring someone in here if your brother is like kind of uptight i definitely do understand not wanting them to hear anything the way that our apartment was set up um there was a living room in between i had the master and he had the um adjoining room with the bathroom so we had the space of the living room typically i would turn tv the tv on so they don't hear anything you can also have the tv on in the living room

those are we had kind of like a code indicator like if he would walk into the house and the tv was on the living room and no one was sitting there somebody's in my room so we he would already know like not to barge in because he's not a knocker so we had to come up with a system right and so the i think the double tv i i never heard him i will say that i never heard him i don't know if he heard me also taking advantage of like possible work schedules so like if he's not there come on over like whatever if he comes while you're here if you're trying to avoid in terms of like them crossing paths and then also once you it's like one of those things that you get into the groove of it i think like you overthink because oh this is my brother this

is my brother's my sister like you overthink it once you're in the groove and it's like you're 25 so i'm gonna assume your brother is like a year younger 24 you all are fucking grown so they're they're gonna know like someone walks in look like right my brother would just dap up niggas like hey what's up man or if and that was only if he ran into them most of the time he was kind of trying until the other dude was in the room like try and stay in his rooms like don't have to cross paths i know i would do that if i heard a female voice i didn't want to talk to him yeah i was gonna say you don't you don't have to feel the need that you have to introduce them like that's for one you don't need to be introducing every nigga bitch by the way

everybody's been gay today yeah we have a lot of we have a lot of i love that be gay today hot gay butt sex so you know you definitely don't need to feel like you have to introduce all these people you running through to your brother like brother mind your business but also like considering y'all live

together I would assume y'all are at least close in some type of way so like if you feel like you want to like slowly bring it up like slowly start to introduce it start them off at night you know start them off on them night booty call hours that way you can be like it'll more so leave it if they're leaving maybe they'll brush past each other when they're

leaving in the morning so it's like well the deed's done and it's just like oh yeah i you know uh oh you know of course like you it seems you said you're moving into his house so yes there is a respect level for it being his house but there's also respect level because you still live there and you are the older sister you got to get your back i was gonna say pull card pull that rank i mean i was the oldest one in the situation and that's really good jamila because when i was fucking with the welder he would you drilling it he was drilling what was he welding he was welding professionally or a hobbyist i mean he was a professionally a welder he had he had neck tech oh my god he looked like fucking mecca loves blue collar men i do oh well yeah my

dad's a blue collar guy i really like know how to talk to them even though it's like and then people always be like well since you're educated do you feel like your conversation that's like why do y'all want to talk theory with your nigga like you don't have to do that we sit here and watch power like i'm having a great time yeah i want to show you a funny tiktok do you see me like we're not talking i'm not trying to get intellectual exactly exactly this is at home at night please be serious i'm off the clock i'm doing no tiktok topics right now literally like he so he was he was on like that obviously like well their schedule like he would come in kind of early like around seven eight ish because we would be in bed by ten but then he would be up at five

so if you end up you know bagging someone who it's not serious because it wasn't like that was my boyfriend but like you your brother will kind of pick up on the schedule is what i'm trying to say yeah i think like a good way to do it is like if he hasn't broken the seal yet like it also depends on how long you've lived together if it's been like a week then i think like if you want to wait for him to break the seal give it a month and he probably will if you're like it's been three months and like i don't know when if he is fucking and like when he's taking them in because i'm not seeing it so like if you feel like you need to break the seal do it like you know he like works uh like whatever like if he works like late nights just like text him that night being

like hey are you working late tonight he's like no why it's like oh i was gonna have someone yeah and like just something like that where it's not like face to face so casual so casual it's like that day it's not like hey i'm you don't have to go into details for him to know what the fuck you're talking about like oh i'm about to have somebody over i got somebody over it's a simple text message he doesn't want to know as much as you don't want to tell him and like you don't want to know about like you don't want him to know he doesn't want to know either like this fan does not want to know about like your sex life so probably you're on the same boat you don't have to like dodge things about him because like you'll both like mecca like you said like you'll both be

being like okay cool there i'm gonna wait and stay in my room until they like you're both gonna be kind of doing that and it's it works in that way so i think like someone has to break the seal and for all you know he already broke the seal and he's just like you probably don't know if he's anything like my brother the moment you break the seal i know with me and darington he never wanted to hear about me but he was always so excited to tell me about what he was doing so I just feel like he probably has been itching for you or like trying to peep like okay so what you gonna do because I remember Darrington was obviously the first one to break the seal for us and he was like oh nigga I thought she was asexual I don't know what like I was like oh

made that a conversation like the next time like say if y'all are in the kitchen be like damn you don't get no bitches where to like say something like that so then it starts a conversation so y'all can be like he he's like okay well shit i'm somebody respectful for you like yeah exactly exactly yeah i think that's such a good point yeah make it like a joke and then it's not it's because it is not serious and like you both feel the same way and so like someone just has to figure it out otherwise you'll both you'll be like literally like 45 years old living with your brother and neither of you will be having sex and like that and that can't happen that sounds horrible like yeah that sounds that sounds really bad so yeah and you're close like you said if you

lived if you live with a sibling yeah and matter of fact try it tonight do it yeah like don't wait any longer get it on have fun yeah be gay today that was crazy well thank you guys so much for being on this was so fun and promote your individual socials where people can follow you and listen to your podcast um my socials are at macaveli on instagram and on tiktok and it's I hate H8 Machiavelli on Twitter because Elon took my original account. Elon must just not care about Black people. And I'm also on Sky Blue. I hate Machiavelli as well.

Blue Sky, sorry. I like Sky Blue. That sounds like vodka. That's cute. Yeah. So I am underscore I am Jamila everywhere. YouTube is just Jamila Bell. Yeah.

Actually, on Blue Sky, I'm Jamila Bell because they don't have underscores. Oh, okay. Cool. I didn't know that. Yeah. so um buy our merch we've got new merch oh yeah is this i got i got a shirt on therapy need that period oh you got the maroon one yeah so if you're on uh patreon which you can join uh you can join our patreon which is either you can be part of our live stream or get the videos

join that get our merch you can see what we're actually wearing but also go to our instagram megan and melissa and then join us uh tomorrow we'll have fisting friday it was a joke name that we came up with and then we were like you guys tell us what we should actually name it everybody's like i'm not i'm abstaining from voting because i want you to be forced to continue calling it fisting friday and so wow okay it's still called fisting friday all that is is just us recapping it has nothing to do with actual fisting except sometimes it does

the entire intro is about fisting okay yeah and then mind you again I have to reiterate this is our first time talking to Melissa outside of this okay so this is what you've been

doing when you log off exhibition is the word yeah one day we have but am i wrong that's when y'all can write in where you've been wrong about things in your lives we also propose things that we may have been wrong about and also nominate the worst of the week tuesdays we have see you next tuesday that's where we read the results from but am i wrong the previous week um and we also do a little catch-up wednesdays you've got off and then thursday we're back here for don't blame me wow bye

this is a sister sign production hosted by me megan rinks and me melissa d montz plus diamond imprint productions post-production by coco lorenz production assistance by melanie d watson and music by ryan hunter and giacomo picasso