Don't Blame Me! - DBM: My Friend is A Leech

Episode Date: April 17, 2025

Content Warning: Don't Blame Them - Weight Loss This week Meghan and Melisa are giving advice on: Work friend having feelings for you Friend making plans on your behalf Announcing you don't want to have sex with your friend Having a crush on your lab partner Don't Blame Them: Weight loss due to health issues Buy Our Merch https://crowdmade.com/collections/sister-sign Call In - 310-694-0976 (3 minutes or less) Write In - [e-mail] (300 words or less) Follow Us! instagram.com/meghanandmelisa @meghanrienks instagram.com/meghanrienks https://twitter.com/meghanrienks @sheisnotmelissa instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa instagram.com/diamondmprint.productions Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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You're richer than you think. hi hello if you could see us which you should go on patreon see we look like like spring has sprung spring has sprung and we look like we look like we planned this but we didn't know we're just on this wavelength we know we are and it's i i love when we stay there i love when we're there if you're also watching and you notice that there's something missing she's single again i'm not this is like i like forget to put it on like when we first got engaged i would like forget like a good amount yeah and i haven't done that in like a long time but this we like started we we moved up our recording time to be like slightly earlier are we starting slightly earlier slightly

yeah but we're only doing two today exactly no i wasn't as stressed about it but i was like running around like with a like a chicken with a head cut off remind me to make my electrolytes okay i couldn't couldn't find a god really you know what the bleeding fingers that was kind of an issue because i couldn't find band-aids and i like there's so many things i was trying to do and not get blood everywhere do you need band-aids to take home with you no i'll tell mox to pick some no you know i have like a billion right no i don't i would like some then okay thank you um but they are black people band-aids so they're gonna be a little dark on you i was just letting you know hey you know some people like the look of band-aids yeah they don't

need to blend it also by the way these don't they don't blend in those are darker than your skin yeah but yeah i like have repeatedly kept cutting my fingers and most and i were trying to figure out what it's from i think it's my contact case um but uh yeah i forgot to put my ring on which feels so naked and the way that i like literally just like cleaned myself tanner thing and like because i'm not tan none of my body is tan correct just right here because i was clean i was like oh this bottle is still open let me clean it and then i didn't wash my hands so anyways welcome to another episode of don't blame me it was a solo thank you this is where we give advice we're recording in person it's so lovely you can again watch on patreon support the show there

but we're gonna give we're gonna change some lives some hearts and minds hopefully i hope so i just had an idea for a tiktok yeah for what i gotta write it down okay i wonder how i'm gonna decode how i wrote down all the ideas i have of tiktoks for us to make when i wrote but i definitely wrote them down unmedicated last night while also watching tv so i am a little curious about because you know me and my to-do list where i literally have to text you and mots often going do you know what i mean by what this means there was one about like did you watch mickey blue eyes yet no but it's still there it is still there there's one there's one that was on there for like months about like chips or crackers or something and neither you or moss can remember

and i was like well i have to assume it's important i finally deleted it and i don't know but we'll see and don't let me forget to get gas on the way home i will run out yes i needed to get gas on the way home yesterday i mean sorry the last time i came oh you haven't driven since then okay i need to get gas before i come over to your place tomorrow do you want to get just drive and get gas at the same time okay i would do just so you don't have to stress about it yeah so if you'd like to call in for the podcast and get some advice you can leave us a voicemail at 310-694-0976 international listeners you can send us an audio message email that to meganpodcast at gmail.com if you are like i don't i don't want you to hear my voice

we love hearing your voice that's like our preferred method but you know we we let you the other way so you can also just type out and send it to that same email you can type it out and send it to us on instagram in a dm and you can also fill out a form that we have listed in the show notes it's also in linkedin our bio and everything but for all of it you'd be aging or over or have your parents permission again the audio ones keep it under three minutes the written ones under 300 words and it's anonymous so don't tell us your name you can come with a fake name our audience really loved the lore of the powerpuff girls meets um ninja turtles yeah so if you want to do that that like went over very i didn't know that that was like a something everyone

was gonna love so deeply and people loved it on tiktok too oh true true true yeah so if you want to do something like that we do always say that you don't have to go above and beyond and come up with the whole universe but be wary of the universe you are creating if you're trying to just kind of like half-ass it because sometimes it can allude to things you don't want to allude to. Incest. We do ask that you let us know how old you are, not just that you're over 18, because it helps us get a sense of you, get a sense of you, get a sense of the vibe, get a sense of the advice we should be giving because it does depend. And then be honest. Give your examples of what's going on, whatever, and we will do our best. And as always,

you can let us know if you're sensitive and we will keep that in mind. Did you say the phone number? Okay. and this time i'm back i'm pretty sure okay i like i trust myself you look gorgeous today this eyeshadow looks really good with the dress everything coordinates a new face technique oh maybe that's part of it too that i'm noticing the 53 never done it before the 53 yeah it's like something that i've been seeing on tiktok you do 53 three five here and then three here five for your light and then three for your darker one

and then blend it no it looks really good thank you i also think the eye the eyeshadow looks really great today thank you so much it's great so join our patreon see how gorgeous she is shall we get into our first all right let's get into the first one i am in a happy six year long relationship with my boyfriend. We're planning for engagement this year. This question isn't about that. Okay. I have a coworker, let's say Jay, and we have become quite close friends over the past couple of years. I've never really had a good coworker friend before and it really helps these days and it really helps the days go by quicker. However, recently Jay has made it clear both with drunk texts and sober hints that he has strong feelings for me. I've been cleared that

say thanks but no thanks from me and he knows seemingly oh and he knows and seemingly respects my partner as well now here's my concern sometimes we hang out one-on-one outside of work 95 of the time is to play pickleball and i have not shared jay's feelings about me with my partner mostly because it has truly no impact on our relationship and frankly it's annoying to think about why can't you just like me as a person and a friend anyway yeah no no no what no no no what no no to work hanging out outside of work yeah no yeah no you know because here's the thing like i agree like why can't we just be friends why can't guys just like view us as friends but that is not a a single person activity and changing that you can't just be like we're we're i'm we are only

friends if one person still has feelings for you you're not like fighting the good fight showing that men and women can just be friends because only one half of you feels that way right and it's also a work situation so it will make things awkward at work because the more y'all hang out the more that he's gonna fall for you because you were constantly in his life you're there during work hours and outside of work hours he's also texting you all drunk like that's so inappropriate and that's like the thing i think like you're not creating a you're not creating a boundary there and like by no means am i saying that like he's taking this as an invitation but like if he has drunk texted you and also sober hints that he has feelings for you and you have

been like yeah thanks but no thanks and he hasn't stopped with that and he like it's still like kind of a thing or whatever or you at least still know that he feels that way about you i don't think we should coddle men like that like i literally think i'm like oh okay so then we can't be friends because you're not actually my you're not my friend right so in this there are plenty of people that play pickleball for some reason no there's so many so stop find another pickleball partner and he is someone you work with and if you don't have to have lunch with him like do if anything outside of work projects stop because he's already crossed the line that he shouldn't have crossed as a co-worker and knowing that you have a fiance yeah and I think like maintaining

a relationship with him after that is making it so like it's okay for him to it it tells him it's okay for that to happen with other co-workers yeah and i just think it's like an it's an inappropriate boundary crossing and also i think in general not telling someone about something because it's like well it's like really not a big deal do you know the amount of useless fucking shit i tell months all the time it's not a big like i literally like i will go on a 15 minute tangent about like a tiktok that i saw and then i go i don't even know why i told you that so like we tell our partners useless information all the time and so then to like also put this in the category of like it doesn't make it doesn't matter it doesn't mean anything that's like

why haven't you told him yeah and also like if it's like so annoying for you and all of that it's like okay but you're still friends you're still hanging out like if it really was you know really hurtful and like really annoying and frustrating to like feel like you had a friend and it was just not that i totally understand like waiting a bit before telling your partner because like there shouldn't be but sometimes like as a woman like it does feel like a little bit of shame in that of being like, well, I feel stupid and I feel silly. Like I thought we were friends. Like you clearly weren't a friend back to me. Like it just is like wound your ego a little bit. Not that it should, but we internalize a lot of that. So I understand like needing a minute

before you tell your partner, but maintaining a friendship after that is weird. Yeah, it is weird. And even if you think that you would not care if it was the roles were reversed and your partner had a coworker like this, I think it's because you're viewing this as like, well, I innately know that I'm not attracted to Jay and I don't like Jay, you can only innately know that about yourself. You would not feel that same way about your partner. Right. So this to me is a big no, no. So let's wrap it up. Yeah. Expeditiously. Send Jay along. All right. We're going to take a break when we get back. We'll get to the next one. In Toronto, every arrival is a statement, and nothing says it better than this.

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Conditions apply. Visit scotiabank.com slash HISA to learn more. Scotiabank. You're richer than you think. We're back and it's time for the next. I'm 25 female cancer. Serena is 26 female Aquarius. I'm also an Aquarius. Serena always seems to jumble me into her plans without even asking. This week, she asked if I can take her to the city because her car needs fixing. I just helped her two weeks ago with this issue for a week.

She's literally refusing to make the appointment for Monday without me because she's relying on my car. The city is an hour away, also 100 miles round trip. I told her I would need gas money and she said, I might be able to give you some. Not only is it not definite on the money part, which I didn't ask for last time, she also expects me to drive up with her, take her home, and drive back up when her car is ready later in the week. I only have one vehicle at the moment.

My husband needs the car Wednesday to go to the city for work. And literally the day after, I have to drive up for a heart appointment. That's already 200 plus miles just doing my shit alone. then having to help her would be 500 plus miles in a week not only is that putting miles on my car but also not even offering to pay for gas when she's using me as an uber i have never asked huge favors of serena i've always helped with no hesitation i need her to understand just because i am a stay-at-home mom that i have a family now and responsibilities i can't just drop everything to help her anymore. In the past, I've loaned her money, bought her food, taken her to work,

taken her to doctor's appointments, helped her prevent getting evicted multiple times by cleaning her apartment and not lifting a single finger to help or even thank me. I finally feel like I'm just drained. She also has the means to get it towed. I'm even debating is this friendship even worth it anymore. I know for a fact she never helps me unless it benefits her. A note, Serena is not a person who takes well to strong criticism or confrontation. She will always find a way to twist it. I've tried my best to be a supportive, loving friend and caring friend. I've never asked for anything in return in the past. I've just done it to help, even if it's been at my physical expense or mental expense it is so funny to me when people like this are like i'm really not

good with like conflict or confrontation i'm like so you just want to be a completely unchecked fucking weirdo what a leech no this is like this is like crazy to me this is and she just expects you to do this without being asked like this is like me and moths like this is like what you do is like your partner of being like i literally texted moths on the drive here being like when are you taking my car in again and he was like saturday 7 a.m i was like perfect but like I I didn't text you and say hey did you make like once like you're driving my car like that's crazy this is also like not a village to me you are a chauffeur yes not just a chauffeur for a personal assistant and like I've had like friends who have had like specific medical

appointments where like they can like regular ones over the course of months where they cannot drive themselves and they felt like so guilty asking me because like hey you're really far away from like we're not close to each other and where we're going is not close to where you are but not the same as being a stay-at-home mom but like you work from home you're the only person who has like a flexible enough schedule could you do this and I'm hoping to try and find another way to do it and I was like yeah of course and like worked with somebody else who's able to like help do that and like that this person has done so many things for me would do that do what i mean like it wasn't even a and they were so think it's just like in that situation that you're talking

about they were also in a capacity where like they can't medically they wouldn't be allowed to to uber anything yeah no they weren't allowed to this person yeah has the means to get their car towed but they don't have the means to pay you money for gas no like and the expecting of it is like really crazy to me it's it's bonkers like tell her you're busy tell her like if she needs to make plans she needs to go through you first but she's a leech stop it she doesn't do anything of a friendship i'm not saying it should be like transactional but you both should be benefiting from it in some type of way because why else would you be friends with this person yeah and so like I'm just like, you need to just end this because she's just going to keep doing it.

She's going to she's taking advantage of you. Yeah, I think that like I agree, relationships aren't transactional, but like you should never feel resentment when someone who you like someone who you're really close to asks you for something because resentment doesn't build over one time. It builds like little by little over and over and over again. And it's because, hey, I know if I asked you to pick me up, I've asked you to pick me up in the airport and like you you say no. and so you you have a lot of wait wait no not you i know i just want to make it clear first of all

that wasn't me we i am like incredibly i i'm fine i would i would pick people up from the airport thankfully no one asks me to pick them up from the airport but like i think in general it should be like it's it's not tit for tat but like if you are you're feeling resentment and like even if you didn't tell us that she was not reciprocating any of this energy in your friendship I would assume because you're feeling resentment resentment doesn't just like happen from a friend asking for a favor even if they don't like if even if they kind of expect it or even if they don't say thank you like resentment builds from the fact of like you can count on me and I can't count on you right and like then the friendship in itself is not really a friendship

and like you're not it's lacking and sometimes like yeah friendships aren't 50 50 all the time but then you need a friendship that is 50 50 or 60 40 to counteract a friendship that is 80 20 Right. Like if you're not getting anything from her emotionally, you're not just like kicking it and hanging out. You're literally just doing things for her and she's not giving you anything in return. yeah and like your stay-at-home like you don't have a ton of free time for so like still a job yeah and like you don't have and this if this isn't gonna count as this isn't doesn't count as like getting coffee with one of your friends like this is like a hell of a long time can we also talk about as people who live in la a hundred miles in an hour melissa that sounds so lovely one of my uh sorority sisters is gonna be here in july and she told me she's like i'm flying in at

lax but i'm gonna rent a car and driving to ontario i was looking to even see the distance at the time that i looked it was early this morning and so i was looking i was like yeah at that time which is it is 100 miles it was an hour at that time but i'm like what time are you flying in i will promise you as someone who has done that drive because like ontario is near riverside there one some time one time it took me five hours like the way that like when i when i like drive leaving here during like rush hour to back to my place it's not far in miles but like when i tell you i can't even calculate how many miles i'm doing an hour because i'm like well it's gonna take me over an hour and i'm not even in the double digits of how many miles i have at

this point and it's yeah you're not even 15 miles away it's not even i think it's eight miles it's not even 10 yet eight it's eight miles and there's no traffic 17 minutes yeah 15 minutes anytime i go to like burbank which i have to do more often than not sometimes at like 5 p.m on a Friday I want to pull my hair out coming back home 15 minutes it's like two hours getting there it's crazy to see how some like those things just like work at some points that I'm like wow and so then like when there's something that's like really doesn't take me a long time if there's traffic I go I'm not gonna go because I know that this is supposed to take me 10 minutes if it takes 40 minutes i'm it's it no whatever is on the other side of it is not fucking worth it yeah i mean we

were just planning what we're doing tomorrow and yeah and i was like can i come over early so i won't be stuck in traffic because it's it's mind numbing yes but we're all in it together much like high school musical so please get rid of her as a friend and tell her to get her car towed and she can figure out the rest from there yeah and then stop responding also would you have to take your child with child with you i don't know how old they are would you have to take them with you on this trip it's things like this when people like lay it out that i go i'll take my city traffic for not having to drive a hundred miles yeah to get to something it was a hundred miles round trip so 50 50 but like i'm still 50 miles i'm gonna do on a weekend for a facebook marketplace steal

and even then moz will go i'll buy it full price for you no it's on sale but then you have to start doing girl math with gas yeah but you know i can't do anything mileage you just gotta think about it mileage on your car the mental tax that it takes plus also we don't even know if when we get there if it's gonna be something good or not yeah no it's tough yeah it is tough but yeah stopping friends are immediately next up hi so i'm a junior in college and i've been thinking a lot about the situation i was out at a house party with some friends we were all pretty drunk and the topic of sex came up. I vaguely remember making an offhand comment about how there was no way I would ever want to have sex with my guy best friend. From what my girl best friend told

me, it was one of those record scratch moments where everything in the room went quiet and my guy best friend looked hurt, but then got mad and left because he was embarrassed. Hearing about it the next day made me super embarrassed because I've known he's had feelings for me since high school but i never reciprocated them i feel awful and i tried to apologize to him but every time i try to get together with him he makes an excuse about working or needing to study i don't want to lose him as a friend but i don't know how to apologize to repair our relationship help stop being friends people want to fuck you stopping friends because like it seems like they're in the same friend group though you either need to get over the fact that he wants to fuck

you or you can't be friends anymore because like why are you just reminding this man that you don't want to fuck him why was it just like on the tip of your tongue during this drunk conversation and also like when you say it at first i thought it was like hypotheticals of being like yeah no i would like you know i love my guy friends i would never have sex with but i think you said this man's name i think you're like i'd never have sex with jimmy not jimmy's dicking me vom yuck and jimmy's just like he's just chilling playing beer pong and then literally what the fuck you're a junior in college you said feelings are new since high school and you're just over here just saying couldn't pay me to fuck that man me oh my gosh you need that's so mean help is

give him time maybe he has realized you know i can't be friends with you in this situation you are the villains like yeah this is unnecessarily cruel you have to give him time to i mean he's already processed it because he knows that you don't want to i know you don't want to fuck me for four at least four years can you please like why are you announcing this to everyone like we all know we all know you don't want to fuck me because we're all fucking oh my gosh you you just have to give him time this friendship may never recover unless you were like unless the rest record scratch moment was i do love josh then you cannot talk to him you can send him a text message and say i am so so so sorry and maybe give like a heartfelt letter where you're apologizing

your ass off but then after that it it's in his court and he can either forgive you or not yeah this is like it's so like this is so out of power it's such a crazy fucking thing to again offhand to just say to a man who already knows and also by the way your whole friend group also knows and so it's like what what is the point of that because like it for him yeah it feels like the point of that is just to embarrass him which make him feel shitty and remind him of that so i agree like i think a lot of times we think the most heartfelt apologies would need to be delivered in person but like a lot of the time for me i'm like i don't want to talk like if i'm mad i don't want to talk to you but i don't want you to be like i'm going to reserve the apology

for when you're ready to talk in person no no send a text message apology yeah send him a fruit basket yeah and like an edible arrangement and put yourself in like friendship time out with your friend group and be like you know i'm like not gonna come around for like the next couple times and then also make a conscious decision and like tell him being like that was like super uncool of me and like i just like want you to know that like i i feel really bad about that and i feel really guilty about that and like i am making a conscious change not of like deciding don't say this to him but like the conscious change isn't like i okay i'll fuck you the conscious change is like i'm not gonna get so wasted at a party that like my friends has to tell me the next day

that this is what i said yeah oh and how hurtful and embarrassed and it's also embarrassing for you too but like more embarrassing for him no but like and the part that like annoys me is like when he gets a girlfriend i have a feeling you're gonna be like why doesn't she like me so much or like or being like he kind of seems pretty cute like oh my god oh brother this guy stinks like this is just i just in general don't think it's i don't think we should be friends with people who want to fuck us do you what i mean because like then how am i gonna have a friend though no but it's just a level of like i i also just don't think we should like this is just clearly you think about it like clearly this is on your mind and that's the part that's just a drunk mind not

just a mind a drunk mind and like it's just there it's like you said it's on the tip of your tongue for it to come out so easily i'm like okay maybe we shouldn't be friends if this is like the going through your head is like he wants to fuck me he wants to fuck me he is in love with me poor jimmy josh whatever we called him yeah i just said josh from clueless that moment in clueless oh yeah um yeah so you might lose me as a friend and you might not repair this relationship you might lose your whole friend yeah no like if i i really respect friend groups when they're like hey our friend did something like uncool not we're not good with that i had this in high school where whatever but this girl my ex-boyfriend and her got together in like a very like

rude gross like not kind way or whatever then i hooked up with her ex-boyfriend to get to get back at her but her friend group was like you know what what she was out of pocket she's not invited to the next couple parties maybe you guys can come and i was like cool and so like we got invited to and they were like yeah no her and him can't come because that was very uncool and what you guys did and they were like but they started hooking up too they're like yeah but that was just reciprocated right that was just what that was just a response so i think like you know have your friends hold you accountable as well good luck also can we talk about the friend who told you about this the next morning that friend was like you have to know you need to do better yeah

no that because by the way usually it's like there's nothing like don't worry about it no they were like no i'm telling you this right now because there are repercussions there are ramifications of the of the actions of the events that went down that night yeah so yeah and i swear to god if at any point you decide you have feelings for him no you fucking don't like you can't put him through that you have to be so certain in these feelings where you're like let's get married tomorrow you need to go on eat pray love and then write a whole dissertation before you can prove to me that you can do it yeah okay we're gonna take a break it's tough when we get back we'll get into some more

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We're back and it's time for another. Hi, Megan and Melissa. I am 19 she her. My university Kim lab partner is 19 he him we work really well together but lately he's become super flirtatious oh my god we're flirting with everybody in this episode you people in college are horny yeah the birds and the bees horned out and I think I have too we have started hanging out outside of lab with our joint friend groups and on occasion one-on-one I like him as a friend and I like the attention that I actually think is the theme of this episode to be honest I would like him as more but he has a girlfriend and i'm not a homewrecker way to bury the motherfucking lead it's becoming increasingly hard for me to be around him without my feelings growing deeper

when we're out together even with friends we always end up mostly talking to each other when we're in lab it's getting harder for me to concentrate because he's super smart and so am i but i find his intellect hot i'm trying to turn off this crush but i can't stop thinking about him luckily it's almost summer and i'm going back to my hometown but we do have the same major and having classes together is inevitable how do i write out these last two months of school pretend he dies um well you can't do that because they're lab partners they do work together in class he's a ghost that well for me that would be yeah if you're like melissa get you're just getting horny

if he's a ghost oh god just like my fan fix i say you have to stop hanging out with him outside of outside of your lab you have to like lab partners they're usually stuck for the year so like you can't switch around but as far as you making time for him when you're not doing something that's academic stop if you're in you said that your two friend groups are coming together not anymore you are with your friend group if you see him out you do not entertain him on a one-on-one basis yeah i agree with that because i think like i think you make a list of all of the things you don't like about him all the qualities you don't like even things that like objectively you might not find annoying

but like someone else would and then ask your friends be like literally list all of the like the shitty qualities about him or like things you don't like about him and then also at the top of that list which i would remind yourself of constantly is that like it should not be attractive when someone in a relationship is entertaining you because like that talks a lot about their character but also talks about how they would treat you in a relationship yeah so like it's not like you are special and exception to like the rule and like to view this as like wow he's like and i'm not saying you're doing this but like you know i feel like everybody has has been in a situation where it's like oh my god like he has a girlfriend and he like he's like really like

me and like most often unless it's like you are it's one true love you get together like the people on the today show was it them was it the view no they're whoopee that is it the today show good morning america oh those are different shows whatever whichever fucking one it was i think it was good morning america the co-workers who got together like either like and then their spouses got together yeah which i say good so you were either like oh my god like one true love and like it's wow it figures out but like more often than not a guy who has like a girlfriend who seemingly doesn't go to your school he's enjoying the process of flirting with other people a lot not just you repeatedly and i also think that some people do just like

have a flirtatious personality or you because you have feelings you misconstrue their friendliness where he might be like we have you know a lot in common because we have the same major we work well together like you've said like we're friends and you might be misconstruing conversations yeah have you met his girlfriend would his girl like would you have an issue if you were his girlfriend and he had a friend like you and the lab partner so like i think like viewing this as opposed to being like oh my feelings for him looking at this like as much as you can from a more like bird's eye perspective and view of this of being like if i was his girlfriend how would i feel about this just because you need to you need to remember that this guy doesn't like whatever hang the sun

in the moon like when you have a crush it can become like everything they do is adorable like think of him opening an umbrella think of him running think of him tripping think of him having like diarrhea where he has to like hold the bathroom stall like because he's like i'm gonna shit myself you know like think of things that like objectively you're like i wouldn't find that hot and i would find that embarrassing and like put him in those spots and so every time you like see him and you're not again like specifically like platonic academic lab partners just remind yourself of the image of him like running to try and catch a bus so then you can be like okay and you're like it's okay i can save him no no you can't have it can't be you might be in that

infatuation stage where everything is just so cute yeah then i need you to be 19 and fuck someone else fuck somebody else also i know we've got two months to bear before the summertime labs are usually just once a week if we can just get through they are long though like three hours if we can just get through those hours and then you go home we're not studying outside of class unless it's a big group and you are not sitting next to him we're not studying like we're doing nothing because i i feel like he's going to be like you know let's study for the final together no no also i understand that you're smart and he's smart and you're like oh my god wonderful being smart smart people can have fun too so like you need to like go out with

different like go do things if this is the social interaction the only social interaction you're getting and like here i get it it's final i understand i went to college i don't know but like i do think it is like absolutely crucial the way that when i scaled back on like my going out which was like the scale back was quite minimal and i like developed a crush on a guy in my class that resulted in the worst date like of my life and it was like horrible and then i was like i need to go back put me back in those streets back in the street i need to get back in the street i was sitting in the classroom i was got my text it wasn't it was an acting class there was no textbook but i was there i was sitting at my desk and i said i need my ass out

of this desk and i need i need my feet in the street and like that's what i think like there's a bit of like camp tunnel vision and things that can happen when you're like so academically focused that it becomes like your pool in your mind becomes a hell of a lot smaller because like that's where you're getting a that like socialization and the flirting like your opportunity to flirt in college should should never be sequestered to your fucking chem lab school is school yeah and then you find out what parties are happening yes every day of the week after you've studied without him put in your work then you find something else and you go flirt with some other man yes yeah i'm a big believer in like you can be the smartest person

in school you can be so academic and all that like you have to school yes obviously prioritize your school if you graduate college without having taken advantage of like any of the social aspects and opportunities you are just setting yourself on a road for burnout a hell of a lot sooner like it's just going to become much more inevitable you need to like let loose have fun and like distract yourself with attainable yeah single single single people yeah and then when you go back to your hometown is there somebody you want to fuck somebody there yes here i am very okay with people doing a loop-de-loop a circle back for for for someone from high school don't you have do you have someone who you know they spent they took a

a year-long break to you know find themselves find themselves in your bed you know in your twin bed oh god granted if you're 19 you're maybe probably the freshman you've got you've got just the twin extra long bed that's the only difference at this point yeah yeah yeah how did you fare in a twin XL I hadn't slept in a twin bed since I was about seven years old because it's the exact wrong amount of length that you would like mine wasn't XL it was just a twin bed XL was just like for the athletes and maybe you um wait what yeah like everyone had twin xls i didn't have a twin xl but i hadn't the other way i hadn't slept in a bed that size since i was in like i was eight actually seven maybe yeah no first grade i had a full-size bed kindergarten so it wasn't great for

me no i also like i was like so impressed with the girls who like were hooking up with like other freshman because i immediately i saw the bed and i said i'm fucking an upperclassman i cannot fucking this back but remember what happened after my first semester oh you uh they left you put them two together and i moved those two together so my yeah my uh roommate i prayed her way and then when she left they kept saying somebody's gonna may come back somebody may come and that's the power of god exactly exactly and that's hey that's how you got your big bed i slept in with one person in my not my bed his bed and he also lived in the dorms was like my like but we didn't like i think we just like made out i don't we didn't like hook up hook up

but i literally had and we were very good friends and he was single okay and i remember like turning to one point being like is this what people are fucking do like people are like having and he was like it's hard and i was like this is this is insane this is insane yeah that was like my first as soon as i got there i said i was still my first semester i was still a virgin so it wasn't sex in the bed anyway so you know i was i went to the frat house immediately frat house disgusting this man had black silk sheets on his bed and also i had a crush on him because he was not mine but he was like one of the orientation leaders and i was also like i was like i think others like i was like a young college kid i had just i turned 18 like about a week before i got

there and he was a junior and i was like ew you're an adult yeah you you're an adult with your black silk sheets i'm in my fucking twin xl i just turned 18 i don't even have my driver's license ew that's a little granted he did dump me and so like good on him eventually but Could have done it better. All right. We're going to take another break. When we get back, we'll get into Don't Blame Them. When you're a mid-sized business, you need every competitive advantage you can get.

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Conditions apply. Visit scotiabank.com slash H-I-S-A to learn more. Scotiabank. You're richer than you think. We are back. It is time for Don't Blame Them. This is where a listener will call in or write in with their own advice pertaining to a call we'd aired on a previous episode. So they might have personal experience. They might have

professional experience. They might just have something, something to say where they feel like they can give, you know, some additional insight. I do want to give a content warning that this is about weight loss, weight loss due to a medical condition. Hi, Megan and Melissa. Long time listener and first time calling in. I was listening to your most recent episode of Don't Blame Me, the April 3rd one, and wanted to give some advice to a caller who was struggling with weight loss. I was anorexic for a long time, and once I started eating again, I gained 80 pounds in a year. It was really hard to go through. A few years later, now, I've experienced rapid weight loss due to health issues, and I've struggled with that too.

It's like we spend so much time trying to accept who we are and the body that we have just to be them back into the deep end. My biggest advice is to talk to those who are close to you, the ones who won't bring it up. Open up to them about your struggles and fears about both your health issues and the weight loss. If you have a solid support system, they will lift you up and support you in a way that has nothing to do with losing weight as a positive thing. I'm sending all of my love and understanding to the caller and I mostly just want them to know that I'm all alone and I get it and it sucks that was really helpful yeah very kind thank you for sharing so that is it for our episode we hope you all enjoyed as always don't forget to write in call in with your predicament

that you would like us to help you with um and please for the love of god i need some of you to call in for don't blame thems about not fucking with someone who has a has a girlfriend as well as um being friends with someone who wants to have sex like and that was the thing i swear to god if any of you call in being like you know relatable it worked out for me don't don't keep that to your motherfucking self i want to hear it i want to hear it well pay that on a different time because i can't let the delusion we're not even i still want to hear it i love those kinds of stories but like help let's let's bring our community to bring some people back down to earth yeah thank you so much for listening join us tomorrow for a rousing episode of fisting

friday monday we have but am i wrong tuesday see you next tuesday wednesday let us know what your favorite episode is and let the people know and that's the episode that everybody is going to collectively listen to yeah i love it homework yeah uh thursday we'll be back for a new episode of don't blame me make sure you're following us on tiktok on instagram also buy our merch this is an absolute last week that you can purchase this merch i'm giving you a deadline okay and also We figure out about the tariffs. We'll worry about that in future time. Yeah.

We're really banking on Newsom doing his own side negotiations. He said he was working on it. I believe him. I do too. That man is spiteful. He runs on pure spite and that's fine. Yeah. All right.

Well, we will talk to you tomorrow. Bye. This is a Sister Sign production hosted by me, Megan Rinks. And me, Melissa D. Montz, plus Diamond Imprint Productions. Post-production by Coco Lorenz. Production assistance by Melanie D. Watson. And music by Ryan Hunter and Giacomo Picasso.