Don't Blame Me! - Evil Weirdo

Episode Date: June 22, 2026

On this episode of Don't Blame Me, Meghan and Melisa are giving advice on what to do if you start dating your friend, but they still have feelings for their ex, your partner not receiving love the way you intended, and they have an update from the person who was nervous that their partner was going to propose. They also discuss buccal massages and Love Island. Join our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/dontblameme Subscribe to But Am I Watching? Apple  Spotify Subscribe to Don’t Blame Me! Apple Spotify Call In for DBM - 310-694-0976 (3 minutes or less) Write In for DBM - [e-mail] (300 words or less) DBM Submission Form Buy Our Merch https://crowdmade.com/collections/sister-sign Follow Us! instagram.com/meghanandmelisa @meghanrienks instagram.com/meghanrienks https://twitter.com/meghanrienks @sheisnotmelissa instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa instagram.com/diamondmprint.productions Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Wayfair, every style, every home. Welcome to Don't Blame Me. Megan, what are we talking about this week? Well, we are giving you some wonderful advice. first up uh we have a we've got a virgin who's given a blow job to a situation chip and and how do we make a situation chip work do we make a situation chip work is this a situation chip then we also have the uh boyfriend who only feels love when they're getting down and dirty together how do we solve that what's that love language and the problematic nature of the love language

quiz in general and then we also have an update a long awaited thank god we have been waiting for this one of someone uh who had originally called in because their boyfriend they found out their boyfriend was proposing and plot twist they had actually tried wanted to break up with them before that yeah um we're also talking about me having fingers in my mouth morning routines and then watch my eyes glaze over as megan tells me about the children on love island and why i can't watch hey it happens every year around this time uh so how can people participate in this show you can fill out the form that we have in the show notes you can send us a message on instagram you can send an email to meganpodcast at gmail.com or you can give us a call at 310-694-0976 tell us what

you need advice on and we will do our best and you can also uh give us updates and if you have your own advice that you want to weigh in on a write-in or call, let us know. We won't blame you either. All right, let's get into it. When you buy furniture from Wayfair, you're not just getting furniture, you're setting your home up for a lifetime of memories. Visit wayfair.ca today or download the Wayfair app. Furniture made for all of life's moments. That's Wayfair. Wayfair, every style, every home. First up, I'm 24, she, her, and I need advice because I think I may have entered a situation ship before I even got a real relationship. I've never had a serious boyfriend before. I've dated

a little, kissed a few people, had a couple of almosts, but nothing that ever became official. So I'm already slightly out of my depth. A few months ago, I met this guy through friends. he's 25 really funny very sweet and basically has a lot of the qualities that i would want in a boyfriend the issue is is when i met him he was seeing someone else womp womp i liked him but i kept it completely respectful because i was not trying to be the villain in someone else's relationship then they broke up and not long after he told me he had feelings for me i told him i liked him too but i also said i was nervous about being a rebound because his breakup was still fresh he said he understood and that we could take things slow we went on a really nice date

and afterwards we hung out at his place things got physical and i had one of my first real sexual experiences with him try some on we both went down on each other he was i thought he said he was kind of about it no i'm like if he's not full in wait is that what you thought it said too no he was kind of in the way that you were reading it that you weren't reading that as a complete sentence nope you know me only right in front of me he was kind about it but i still left wondering if i seemed confident or inexperienced the next day he started talking about his ex he said there was drama that he felt confused and that he missed how comfortable things were with her so obviously i immediately panicked and backed off a week later he apologized and said he really likes me and wants

to keep seeing me should i give him should i give this a chance no not nope absolutely not no this is like classic man by the way i don't know how long he dated his ex or like whatever but like you should just know that men will do this about like a girl they dated when they were 13 and be like she really I don't know if I don't know like no no she is a mythical creature that is a pawn to be used to make him a victim and like you do not need to get caught up in all of this and I also don't like that you guys were friends there was clearly some flirtationship and then immediately after he breaks up with his girlfriend he hooks up with you knowing you have feelings for him because i'm sure he sensed it and then he after that he's talking about his ex again

no this guy is not ready to date anybody he's not over his ex and he used you and i'm sorry that i have to say that but that's what happened yeah don't believe him because what do you mean like you and your girlfriend just broke up and now you're telling me you like me did you break up because you have feelings for me because if that's the case you should respect me enough and like care about me enough to not like immediately jump into this and just tell me because like that is in fact like a rebound like if you develop feelings for someone else outside of a relationship the mature responsible adult thing to do is yes end the relationship that you're in but don't then subject the other person to to all of that like you take a big ass break and to be fair most

of the time probably won't even end up being in a relationship with that person but it's like oh this showed me that I wasn't in the right relationship right not that I need to date this other person immediately right after and I don't he took advantage of you I don't know if he knew how you were how if that you were a virgin or whatever but like I don't like that no and I don't like that after like a first date with someone who you were also friends with before like if anything I'd take it way slower with someone who I've known before because like there is like a you know you already know this person there's a little bit of like a risk of losing the friendship and also you're learning to see each other in a new light so like doing a nice romantic

date and then being like okay now we're gonna get physical like immediately is just not like respectful to you at all and like him talking to you about his ex is intentional he wants it is it's trying to be like reality check like hey that was fun and all but like i'm not gonna date you like this isn't gonna be serious i'm gonna not be over my ex and like ultimately he'll probably be like that for a very long time until he actually decides he wants to date and move on but using his using his ex as like a scapegoat is just something that men do literally all the fucking time again even if the ex is like i fucking know guys who are like in well into their 20s you're being like no i just like got my heart broken and like now it's like i can't really like love i don't want to

open myself up like that and then i'll talk to like their girlfriend and they're like yeah like i was like when was that relationship and she was like oh um i think like right before high school and i go i'm so sorry so they were 12 they were 12 and like he can never let no you're being manipulated like you are being manipulated fuck this guy yeah and if you can't since you met him through friends if you can avoid him please do and also i try your best not and you didn't explicitly say this but it sounds like there's a little bit of like awkwardness embarrassment or shame of feeling like situationship before relationship like that's the wrong step i most people i know got into a situation ship before a relationship yeah like this is it is incredibly

incredibly common um and it sucks but you can now see those things that you are looking out for and like i mean my ultimate consistent always advice with that is if you are not looking for a situation ship you have to be up front that you're looking for a relationship like the opposite it and a situationship doesn't become a relationship like that yeah but i also don't know specifically if this is you can even call this a situationship i guess because they're friends yeah they're friends but then like you went on a real date yeah and then you hooked up after the real date that's not really a situationship well i think the situation it's the next day let me talk about my ex kind of thing because it's not a booty call it's someone who's giving you enough of a

relationship that like makes you feel like it is ultimately taking steps to there but it's it's not i think the date is not situationship the hooking up is situationship and the next day is very situationship because like let me lean on you like a friend we just we just hooked up i'm sorry that this is your first uh sexual experience um also like you didn't give a bad blow job if that's what you're worrying about no and you said nothing about what he did so i'm assuming what he did was not that great right yeah how'd you feel if you put a dick in your mouth like no one could have any complaints like that's a there's a dick in your mouth like give you a purple what is it a purple heart like you need a badge of honor like look at what you you've done a purple vein look

what you've done for this country like it's just like no you can't go no that's someone asked you to put their dick in your mouth and you're like that thing that's been hanging in your pants all day okay you and you did that like yeah you did everything that you needed to do you not even needed to you did more than enough yeah okay how was your weekend my weekend was good did you ride the d no and i literally texted i asked monster like on the phone like last night uh when he was driving home and i was like wait did your did your dad ever ride the d which if anyone does not know the d is the new metro line in la and of course because we're la uh every topic newscast about it the merch everything is like ride the d you get a shirt that says i rode the d like we're very much

leaning into it and matz's dad was like oh because he loves he loves los angeles he loves california it's like a new thing here he's like i want to ride it and i asked matz and he was like no i think they might have done it on their own time and i was like okay i'll text i need to text him ask i know that you were looking forward to that to be fair granted uh it it is like an absolutely useless route for anything that we had planned to do so like it really was just like i know i thought taking the monorail i saw that it does let out in front of a bunch of restaurants yeah and so that's always like you write the d go eat and then write it back yep so uh i don't know if they did but if not we'll have to we'll have to do it again because i i mean i'm like incredibly

curious did you go see the trains nope you did nothing locomotive related that you were planning on doing well they they did drive here so they sent a lot of time in a car they had like a lot more plans and like they were here for so long love them to death but they were here for they were here for a while much longer than we thought but also like they had so many plans with like other friends and like other people and so when we were an afterthought yeah so like the things that we were like oh we're gonna do this and it was like oh we actually can't this day and we're like wait what do you what are you doing like who are you like oh we're seeing our friends and we're like what okay so uh the next time they come we will do the train museum but his dad was he was

pretty well and said we were not going to be able to make make that one work but uh they don't do like the open house once a month anymore now they think they do it like once maybe like once a year once a quarter but we have an in because we know someone who yeah can't you just go yeah but the schedules unfortunately didn't line up so besides that uh did some gardening this weekend did a lot of cooking and what else did we do hung out with my niece is talking up a motherfucking storm this girl is yapping and blabbing like she it's a full monologue like sometimes when i respond to her she looks at me and being like why are you talking and i was like so sorry thought it was a question my girl guess not but like she's so funny and anytime like something isn't like working in

like the the timely manner that she would like she goes it is broken in a way that's just kind of like this thing is stupid and broken and uh she tried to do a projector in the middle of the day and i was like so that's like and i was like okay we can try and we like turned the lights off and i was like it didn't work the sun is up and she goes the sun is broken and i was like no actually opposite sun is doing a lot and that's why we can't use it and she goes oh sun's broken and i was like for sure she also asked me if i had nipples and then she was like can i see and i was like those are for me inside of my shirt and she was like okay nipple broken i was like nope they're not broken they're just inside my shirt they're just for me and she goes nipple sleeping

and i go nipple sleeping yeah i've got those too but um one time i am a mammal i have nipples but one time I forget even when it was but like she was like having a meltdown when we were there and she had to do bath time and then she asked if I could do bath time and I was like sure I'll do bath time so now anytime I'm there her mom was like hey so if you guys want to leave before bath time but for the record if you were here at bath time she now thinks that this is this is an option that you can do bath time it's your job yeah and I was like no no I'll do bath time and I will say I do think it helps because she is she's got curls like her hair is curly and so I take a really long time detangling and brushing her hair out which i think helps because when you

know you understand yeah and like when a dad does it like no i mean her mom i'm sure does like that but like you know you've got multiple kids yeah my dad attention to was uh the one that primarily did my hair when i was like elementary school age until i started doing it myself and he's very heavy-handed with it can he braid yeah because he had long hair oh my god long permed like relaxer hair wow in the 70s so like you know how to do that yeah yeah but yeah so you were getting good styles but it was not feeling good yeah yeah it was it was tight like i don't think my dad could even do a ponytail and you know the other the other person who birthed me like straight pin straight thinnest hair you've ever seen like so fine so like again no one in my family even

knows where i got my hair texture from where whatsoever so we did the bath time and that was she was being very fun then she did ask me to do bedtime and i said that's where i clock out girl i i can't do that i know but she will just like sing to you every song she knows which was fun but yeah had a had a good time enjoyed the knicks winning even though i'm like but like i just culturally i love what that is yeah i love it i love jordan woods i was rooting for them one because i didn't want the governor of texas to win exactly and then two just like the mythology but behind all of it and i love watching the videos of them destroying the town and i knew that no matter what they win or lose i was going to get some good videos out of

this on monday i uh got on one of my meetings for work and um one of the guys lives in in manhattan and i was like so like he got on looking distraught and i go so how are you doing and he goes you've seen the news and then i said yes but i'm asking for like your personal take and he goes i'm tired i haven't slept it's not just that the next one it's that it's also pride so there's also a lot of just different energies going on he's a gay guy yeah he's like i just can't it's too much it's too much i just want to go to sleep his social calendar is absolutely exploding it's not even that he's like i don't even it's not that i just i like i don't want to go out he's like i don't want to go outside i'm just tired and it's just loud in different ways yeah moss's

parents uh they were they realized they were staying over a um a bar that i think specifically for the fifa world cup has transformed into a mexico soccer team bar love it and they were like we don't even need to check the score like we already know based on the vibe and she was like But then they also watch the Knicks game. So I'm seeing who else they're rooting for. Like, they're, it's, and I was like, that's exactly who I'm rooting for. I'm rooting for Mexico in the World Cup. And I'm also rooting for the Knicks.

Because, you know, vibe-wise, it's the same. All right, we're going to take a break. And when we get back, we will get into more advice. Your playlist might get you through the workday. But have you ever wondered how your ancestors spent theirs? What work helped them build a life? How did they adapt as the world around them changed? With Ancestry, you can search select historical occupational records for free

for a limited time and discover the stories behind the jobs in your family tree. You've got questions. We've got ancestors. Search free until August 31st. Visit Ancestry.ca for details. Terms apply. We're back. All right, here's the next one. my boyfriend 30 he him and I keep having the same fight over and over. I feel like I'm losing my mind. It always comes back to how we show love. He says I only make him feel wanted when I want

sex which honestly destroys me because that is not what I'm trying to do at all. I feel like I show him love. I check on him. I remember little things. I spend time with him. I support him when he's stressed but somehow none of it seems to count because it's not the exact version of love he wants from me i'm tired of explaining that people love differently but he doesn't really hear me i even suggested we take the love language test and he told me that the guy that wrote it was evil he was yeah he was he's not hey your boyfriend's not in fact wrong there woke king that's all i'm seeing yeah yeah like i don't want like i don't necessarily want to be on his side but then he said that i'm like okay well he knows that i like i like a well-read man right

the worst part is i don't want to break up i love him so much it's embarrassing when things are good i can see a future with him but then this argument comes back and suddenly i'm questioning how do i know if this is something we can fix or if i'm just clinging to a relationship that's already breaking my heart what does he want you to do that's what that's my question how does he want you like he just wants you to be fucking him all the time what does he oh wait okay because that's not what i got because like he was saying he only feels love when you want to have sex with him so i was like oh does he want you to be more physically affectionate but i actually think maybe you're right and he was like the only time i feel love when we have sex

like i guess we have to bone 24 7 like i is that what i could read it in your way too yes no but i'm right now now that you said it now i'm ready to get in your way because like i am confused because i i don't agree with the whole thing of like oh we show love in different ways for sure but like other people receive love in different ways and when you like show up in a way that someone is not looking for like it doesn't register the same and so that's how we can be like oh my god but I did all these things for you and it's like oh that's like not like specifically I think like acts of service for me that is like a huge one when people show love that's wonderful but I so clearly could be able to tell if somebody was like oh I filled your car up with gas and

someone's like okay cool like I could so see how other people would be like yeah that doesn't make me feel loved at all like that was what you took the trash out whoop-dee-doo but like certain things that like Mats took my car to get to the dealership yesterday to like get whatever you're supposed to do when the thing pops up on your system and i was like oh my god that's so nice like that's i'm like oh that's so lovely so there's ways to that we can like our instinct is like how we like you know show love to other people but i think that's kind of like at the get-go and then once we learn how other people receive love we mold and adapt those ways to them so i'm confused what he's asking for because if he's not being specific then like what the fuck

are you supposed to do right like he needs to also like he needs to communicate what he wants and needs because if you don't do that there's nothing that you can do to give that to him yeah except spread your legs all the time what exactly does he expect because i'm the same way like you took the trash out okay like there's literally a service person that comes to my house on sundays and takes my trash to the curb like i don't that's not like i don't i'm not in love with them hey have you seen them though up close they could be cute never seen them um it's like a ghost that comes it's a trash eating ghost just like sitting there and like showing up like that's that's love to me but also i know that like i said like we were saying people receive love in

different ways what do you need and you you were in this place where you're like i love him so much my heart bursts but what i'm doing is not enough for him yeah i could see that being frustrating and also like the fact that you said i love him so much it's embarrassing that that that that carries a lot of weight because like it is embarrassing to like love a man that much like oh my god this is this is mortifying like who am i i'm disgusted so i believe you that like you really care for him but he needs to be specific because i think if he's like no i only feel that because I want you to I want to feel like desired but not necessarily in a sexual way like I want to feel like does he want like lead up to sex in that kind of way like does he want more like oh

no I like you know don't feel like you are touchy feely like you're not as affectionate unless like that's like immediately leading up to sex so then I'd be like oh yeah like you know kiss him more more hugs more cuddle whatever any of those physical affection aspects of his butt they love that or but then if you're like if he's like no no it's just like sex is the only way that i feel like you love me then i'm like something's wrong with this man yeah get out yeah and like that what what is the expectation quit your job and just like spread them like what are you supposed to all that like it's just it does that doesn't make sense to to me if it's that one and if he can't be specific about what it is then it's like okay cool so i actually cannot do anything

unless you tell me what it is that you are looking for and we can't keep having this conversation without you telling me what it is that you what what you want like that's just like it's just not fair but now i am wondering if maybe he's not saying anything like that because you were the one who suggested the love languages because like to try and understand it more but he knew enough to to know that this man was trash but like okay then what are we gonna do to fix this don't offer don't have a problem and don't offer solution i hate that oh my god i hate it so fucking much if i have a problem with someone i'm gonna tell you exactly i will be able to tell you exactly what i want you to say to me to make me feel better like i could have a script for you right

now yeah i want you to meet sometimes i just need like space like just don't bother me for a minute but that is a solution to a problem now if you want to complain at me and be like well there's nothing to do okay then keep that to yourself why do you include me then if there's nothing i can do just so we both feel shitty what i don't get it but yeah this feels like it needs further investigation and if he's weird about that we're having like bait like beige flags to yellow flags to orange flags to red flags yeah well let us know what he says i guess because like what is this what is what and what is what is his what's his solution yeah what's his end goal is his end goal more sex or like do you just like need to say that i like i love you more you know so did you

say how long you were together oh this man's 30 no you didn't say how long you were together yeah i'm torn on this one i'm split i think it could be either way let us know could be an easy solution he could be but he needs to let you know and if he doesn't let you know then get out please because that means just just gonna get worse down the line well i not to like catastrophize but i think if like he can't get specific about it and like i think if he can't get specific about it it is because he wants just like constant sex and like more sex and then i'm thinking like okay what content are you consuming like what are you watching like what is like what do you why do you think that like women need to be at like pleasuring you at like the drop of a hat like to feel like

you can only receive love from like a specifically a woman like when she's pleasuring you sexually like that feels the wrong rhetoric but also it doesn't feel like someone who would have that rhetoric playing like in their circle would also not necessarily know that the love language is quiz it's problematic so like i am like i'm i'm still confused or is it like initiating because because you're saying i only make him feel wanted when i want sex is it the initiating that you he feels desired then i don't know yeah that's what but he also needs to be able to communicate that yeah i always think if you can't if you can come if you can complain you can communicate otherwise we're just you're just enjoying this process of like me feeling bad and not being

able to do anything about it yep so i have high hopes that you'll be able to figure this out and if not then i am fully convinced he's a total weirdo yep which by the way i learned hold a different connotation in other places i made a tiktok and i called this girl a weirdo and someone was like oh i know you're from california with the way you said that and i was like wait what and they were like no weirdo is like a like a grade a insult here like a weirdo is like that person's like that's like the worst of the worst and i was like well yeah and i was like no and then i saw another comment it was like weirdos feels like a really light word to call this person and i was like what and then i talked to matz about it and he's like no that's definitely

like a california slang you know it's funny like you say that but that's like something that me and my sister say all the time so it's not specifically a california thing but then i would say two it was when the the nicks like got into the into the uh championship and i said something to avia where i was like i can't wait for all the nicks contact or i can't wait for all the nicks content to come out because they're so weird and i meant that in like a playful like fun type way and she took it as i was being mean towards them and i was like no that's not what i meant if i was being mean i would have called them a weirdo yes so that i've read i was looking up at this because i was like so curious because again i've lived here my whole life so there's ones where i'm like i didn't i

don't realize and i saw someone talking about how like oh if you are in uh la like you know if someone calls you weird and i was like well that's not that's not how it is in bay area and i was like no that's the difference in the bay area like universally california weirdo derogatory weird in NorCal not bad weird in LA bad and I was like oh that's so interesting because like I think someone can do something like in the context I'm like oh this person's like that was weird like yeah that and that's different that means something very different yeah but I was like oh okay but it was to see people being like oh my god weird like what that's like the lightest insult I've ever heard and I was like oh no that's just that must be a

regional thing and then i looked it up and it was like something else with i think i don't know what city but they said goofball in one i hate that term that's also such a so old such a white term like a white term i know and i was like what city are people like fighting physically fighting over the word goofball like but like if you call somebody goofy yes that's different and like there's ways that i'm like i can understand like that was not my cultural upbringing but like i I have a cultural awareness now where I'm like, no, no, I know that that is not a, that is a word that holds weight. And so they're in different, it was like talking about all of these different places and some of those words. I was like, oh, I would have had no idea.

And I was like, oh, that's why some people think that weirdo sounds so silly because I'm looking at goofball going like goofball. And they're probably looking at weirdo going weirdo. Like, OK. I was like, that's so interesting. Let's take a break. we are back and tell me about your weekend okay so i got my lashes done and i think they look great they do it was i get them done by the same lady and i think the reason i didn't like them the last time it was probably because she had she spent so much time fixing from when i woke up

from my deep thing that it didn't I just didn't like how it looked but I love them now and I think this is where where I'm staying yeah the lash map is what I think what they call it that it's very very good for your eye shape yes but I listened to podcasts while I was doing this I didn't fall asleep so what'd you listen to I don't want to talk about that for sure but wait did you listen to something because sometimes I'll do that if I like need to stay awake or I need to like pump myself up I'll like listen to rage bait something that gets me angry it wasn't rage bait It just, you know, I'll just keep it personal. Okay.

Yep. Okay. Got it, got it, got it. And got my nails done. But yesterday, I got a buccal massage. Shut up, I got you. Let some lady put her hand, her whole fist in your mouth. Mm-hmm.

Wow. Wait, how was it? Okay, so the reason I got it done is because every morning I wake up, my jaw is popping, creaking. out of place and so i was like let me go get this done this lady i could hear every time she was sanitizing she had gloves on she was switching them out when she was doing different things and she also has done she did something for me it's another one of my my russian ladies but i've been to her before and she's giving me a facial on friday but um it hurt like a bitch but she was so kind and was talking me through it oh my god talk you through it so gentle yeah

so like she was like squeezing the hell like she's like it's so tense in here i can feel it and she as she was squeezing with one hand she was gently patting my head with the other and being like okay just breathe you've got this oh my god just calm down like and was going through it was like an hour of torture i think i'm still a little bit swollen in here like from her doing it but i my mouth felt so loose after and this morning when i woke up like no popping my mouth just feels free and loose but if i didn't like needles i'd probably just go get botox i was about to say i was about to say because like i every time i watch one get done it's like it does to me what asmr does to other people where i'm like oh my god that look because like yeah i've

got i carry so much tension that looks like it would be like the hurt so good kind of a thing like so so badly yeah but i did see one other person talked about like that shit like you guys did not prepare me like that shit like fucking rocked me like that was crazy yeah how much that hurt and now you saying that is when i've seen and you know like when i've seen people get those like really intense massages where they start crying like tears are coming out of my eyes she even put like tissues over my face and just like dotted the tears out of my eyes like she was so kind but like it's like getting a fucking pap smear like my god i mean like with a pap smear that's over in two seconds i don't find that painful i don't find like whenever they're

prepping me for a pap smear and they're like there might be some cramping i'm like there's literally nothing i don't feel anything and but with this it was it was painful but like it felt so good afterwards and even right now like it just feels good god yeah that sounds like that is without a doubt like on my bucket list of something that i'm like i gotta i gotta get some russian lady with a hand with well you can come with me because i get i have a quote-unquote black card to this place and i get one free friend to come do a thing so if you want to come just tip them you can come yeah i get every month i get one free thing for a friend to come that's that's nice yeah that's a good system i can get as many services i want and this is including massages

facials um they do a whole bunch of lymphatic drain like they do a bunch of stuff and i can bring a friend and they can get a service have you ever done a lymphatic drainage massage i talked about it like last week when i did oh yeah what did you think about that okay so i've learned since that what i got was not the norm i feel like there's no regulation every time i've gotten one i was like i would have rather had a regular massage so i got one at the same place it was a lymphatic massage but I had put that I love because they they asked like how what kind of touch you want I love a firm touch and so that's what I got and when I got the massage it was like when I think about the perfect massage that's the kind of massage I want like she was so firm

and like took her time with every part of my body and like really worked every little kink out and then when I went back yesterday because I was getting a massage too and I was like lymphatic drain and then the lady was like but i didn't the same lady that um was my massage therapist before wasn't there that day and so um the lady was like okay we're gonna do lymph you have a lymphatic drain but i see that you like a firm pressure lymphatic drain massage is usually softer and i was like what because that's not what i got from that other lady at all and so that's what i was expecting but that's not the norm i guess so when i go back i'll be going back for that this lady did she did a deep tissue massage we didn't do okay a lymphatic drain for this one because i

was like i don't just want like you rubbing me i don't there's no enjoyment for that for me no it's so awkward yes and so but she but she did a deep tissue but then also did the lymphatic drain on my stomach though which is what i wanted i don't think there's a norm for this soft touch that's what i had was like a very like true and the way that a soft touch and i was like i'm so sorry like and i didn't say this to them but i was like i'm rougher when i'm constipated and i'm trying and i'm doing the clockwork circles on my fucking stomach like i just you know when i was getting my period and i'm getting cramps i like i you can throw an uh you can throw a deep knuckle into my uterus like that's like that's very okay with me like i'm used to that and i literally i

walked away from that being like i'm oiled up for no reason like i just like i'm i'm sticky and i don't i don't get it i think i would it would make sense like the only time i've been like oh i would actually really enjoy this is like after i've gotten off of a flight and i'm like i'm clearly swollen yeah and there is like all of this water retention i'm like oh that would actually be helpful but other than that if i'm taking the time and i'm smushing my face in that little donut i want you to essentially walk on my back yes i want those knots to be gone yes and so that's what that's what i like too and so that's kind of i'm preparing my body for my flight coming up because like all that like even the facial massages and stuff help clear everything out

getting when's your flight not till july it's a month from okay tomorrow but uh i just i just want my body to be prepared in every possible way i got going vegas short flight oh my god the way that you were talking about this i was like are you going to europe and you didn't fucking tell me no i'm just going to vegas but like my lungs have been fucked up every time i fly now i was just thinking about the swollen legs and i was like i mean i get i still get my i wear um compression socks and everything but it's more so for my lungs yes yeah that's what i'm doing you know i told you last week that i had ran out of my inhaler and since i switched doctors i need a new prescription they would take they're dragging their legs they're like their feet for that um

no this is a breathing mechanism this is you can't drag your feet with this one now i feel like like because i was out of my medicine for like two days and now i need to if i feel like i have to start over i don't feel like i can i'm strong enough to work out and i was like i just started yeah it really irritated me so i was like i just need to get an inhaler fast so amazon has a thing where you can just get on and type what you need and they asked you a ton of questions but they literally sent me the inhaler the next day and so that was my temporary inhaler i will say that it didn't hit like my real inhaler hit yeah but at least i got something and then i just called my doctor and i was like hey what the fuck is going on

essentially what's the hold up and they're like well we didn't get the request from the pharmacy i said well i put a request in online on your website too and someone responded to me but i didn't get the you were asking they were asking for like a picture of my other prescription i didn't have a prescription a picture of the prescription inhaler doesn't have what the prescription like it doesn't have your name and stuff on it inhaler i don't have that but then finally she uh when i talked to her she's like i'm putting it in right away like you can go pick it up in an hour but that just pissed me off i i hate the admin of health care like it's just it's so fucking annoying because like you said like when you're in the groove of it if there's

like anything that delays it a little bit that's like okay well now i have to like pace myself and like and ration what i do have to be able to function enough to get to thing to get the thing that i need to feel better and i know you go through that with your your prescription just isn't available sometimes and it's like it's the most frustrating thing i will i would ask though i would ask cvs if uh because i don't know what they can do it for but cvs can write they can be your prescribing doctor for certain things damn really yep i had already talked to them that i had to do that with birth control because like my doctor was just not responding in california birth control is just very easy to get this damn i wouldn't see and that's not that's not

nationwide either that's a california thing because i would think like birth control diabetes medication uh anything respiratory like any inhaler sort of thing and like epi pens like those would be things that i'd be like you should that should just be the pharmacy should be able to to do that because those are they can they can give you like shots for everything literally yeah like yeah yeah they they should they should be able to i wish so you know how el nino's coming up yeah i i i don't even fear i i predict i know we're about to get some really epic shark movies because of this one motherfucking interview on like i don't know what new like ktla something it was some local news that they were interviewing a guy i don't know what his

credentials are but he was in fact on a boat so i trusted what he said where he was like you know when el nino hits california waters become a whole different ocean and i was like and the opening scene of the next movie like it was so deeply cinematic and they're showing all of these shots of like just absolute massive motherfucking sharks and they were like this beach you won't even recognize it and i was like it's very much giving the daphne bridgerton uh shark movie where like the whole town floods and like there's just sharks in her town and i was like that is exactly what what you're talking about but you never saw that trailer no mods watched that whole movie and he was like yeah Daphne Bridgerton she's given birth and there's sharks everywhere it's like such a

classic shark movie she's like floating on a bed when did this take place it's like like recently she shot this movie oh when did the movie come out or when was the movie set I was like I don't know the timeline I meant yeah when did the movie come out very recently okay so she's like pregnant and then i don't know what if it's like if it's got to be somewhere in the like florida or the somewhere where they've got like different kinds of bodies of water like there's like a huge weather event that happens where uh the ocean overflows into like another body of water and now there's just like their whole town floods and now there's just like sharks like in swimming in their on the streets of their town um and she's very pregnant and so she at one point is like on a bed that's

like floating and there's like sharks below her and then she's giving birth and then not to spoil the movie because i did watch the ending on tiktok because i was like how the fuck does this end she gives birth and there's of course blood everywhere sharks love that she like chucks her baby to someone or like something i don't even know if it's still attached to her or whatever and like is like a like being like no like you can't get my baby and then another bigger mama shark comes and kills that shark for trying to kill the human baby wow incredible isn't that like purely cinematic and i was like i bet you the people who make shark movies are so inspired by also they're all gonna be called el nino all right we're gonna take a break when we get back

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Adventure in comfort with Volvo. Whether you prefer gas, plug-in hybrid, or fully electric, there's a Volvo for everyone. Learn more at volvocars.ca. we're back and let's do the update hi my good melissa this is an update from the coastal elite episode where i spoke about my boyfriend's plan to propose completely blindsiding me because i had no idea that we were in that era and i almost broke up with him recently due to a rough patch i'm so glad you're you're giving us an update i've been wondering about you so my boyfriend did not

propose because i told him not to thank god my issue comes from the trip being dot dot dot weird Oh, what a word choice. I wonder how you mean that. A couple examples are him finishing my pain relief, I'm going to assume medication, and not replacing it. I have chronic neck pain. I almost fainted one day and he didn't care and having to ask a few times to do things that I cared about. for context our rough patch had a lot to do with me not feeling considered listened to and feeling like i do 100 of the planning slash thinking i told him when we get back he needs to bring up this conversation because i'm tired of pulling all the emotional weight and he just hasn't he's still up to his usual antics like telling me he'd get something i asked for for dinner and then getting something else or not being communicative like the other day he was saying you should go thrifting today but if you do i don't want to come like for my weekend plans just say you want

some alone time he can that's a good point he continues to make me carry that weight that kind of weight including planning everything or if he does he's loading me with questions and changed plans i'm teetering on breaking up with him for these things not planning a proposal i'd like and some past things that i don't think i can get over broke up over text once persistent lack of communication consideration i don't think he's a bad person i just think he's a bad boyfriend or i'm convincing myself he's evil because the relationship is not compatible i don't know what to think but i'm sure with all this info i should break up unfortunately yes and i would say he may be evil because using somebody's pain relief medication when they have chronic neck pain

and then you don't replace it that's evil no that's like do you know how mad i get when like mott's finishes like half of a diet coke that i like put in the fridge to save for later and he goes you were gonna drink that flat he doesn't finish it he dumps it he goes you were gonna drink that flat soda and he will door dash me a can of soda to the home immediately that's what you do when you're like oh sorry that and that it was like oh accident didn't know you were to you were gonna have this but like this is something that like why did he need might he need that and like what kind of pain medication are we talking about because if it's advil then i'm like wow god you're so motherfucking inconsistent like go to the pharmacy like you can get that from anywhere

you can get that delivered and like okay but then also like if it's like no it's actually a strong a strong one and like it's a prescription then i'm like well now he's taking drugs because when you need them for pain relief that's like medication when you're not prescribed them he's just taking drugs like that's not you know that no no so also i also think at any point if you like consider referring to your partner as evil like it's over yeah that's like that's you want what's worse than weirdo evil like there you go and like that's the step up and like that's and you said that he was both in this so yeah and you said he was a bad boyfriend which like by the way is enough like even just simple things of like i want this for dinner okay i'm gonna get

that and then bring home something completely different that's gonna piss me off like why would you do that why'd you even ask me like that to me oh my god that's like don't fucking piss me off like go thrifting but i'm not coming with you so leave just say leave get out leave like what leave this man i'm glad he didn't propose didn't you see the ring too i think you saw the ring because i think we asked for the ring and i was or you asked for the ring and i was like i don't want to see the ring yeah you found it because then we were also talking about yumi in Tuscany yeah dump him please expeditiously because like none of what you're asking for is like hard and it's not that your needs aren't being met he's like sabotaging you like and that

to me is like there's actually much more intent put in there and a lot more effort to like intentionally sabotage my plans my day my life than it is to like just like do life together or like be inconsiderate like not thinking about someone he's like actively thinking of like the worst possible thing he could do and like that to me is so much worse than someone being like oh i i didn't think about you it's like no no i i made you think that i cared i asked you and then i did the exact opposite well why the fuck did you ask me then yeah this man is evil please leave him alone and i bet you he will get engaged to some like random person in two months and then she'll be divorced in two years and then four weeks later he will propose to somebody else like this

is just this is yeah this is the system i'm sorry me too i'm getting this eye thing done for dry eyes and we'll see if it works what like where where at the optometrists are you getting tubes no plugs nope what are they called it's just heat some machine oh do you not do you do eye drops yeah but like she was like if you do this you don't have to have the eye drops anymore wow i've heard people do i bet this is just like the medical version of it where people do like you can buy these um uh like heated eye patches that you do to cover your eyes it's like yeah this is like the medical but it also because of the heat also can help with lower bleph like making it more open to tell me how that goes yeah i'm gonna do five treatments of it and it's just like 10 minutes

yeah let me know we'll see my eyes work well but that sounds that sounds nice yeah it also sounds like relaxing mm-hmm you just lay there and only 10 minutes are you gonna listen to a podcast you don't panic and open your eyes no i think i'll be fine i saw her doing videos of other people you can have your eyes open you know i do think we should be giving out maybe maybe not maybe there is a reason but Like, those numbing eye drops that I had when I got LASIK were so magic that I think, like, if anyone's concerned about me opening my eyes at any point, just give me, like, opening or closing those. Yeah. But this isn't even, like, it's not even you need that.

Like, you don't need to keep your eyes open or closed. Like, it's just you're having a conversation with the person. Oh. Oh. Wait, I'm so fascinated. Because that's the thing I can't get behind with the, um, that everyone's like, oh, do this for 20 minutes in the morning. It'll help your dry eyes. And I go, I'm so sorry. I have to keep my eyes closed right after I wake up for 20 minutes.

Like, what do you what do you mean? Like, I don't know where in like the medication of my day that goes in because like I'm insufferable without my Adderall in the morning. Like I am bouncing off the walls and then I take it and then I can like get some stuff done. But like, when is there a time for me to have my eyes closed for 20 minutes? Unless I'm sending my alarm to do it, going back to sleep like that's the only way that's gonna work for me because i am in bed to the last possible minute like last week when it was some time where i was like okay i need to in our break i need to go to some water because i haven't had anything to drink today and you were like have you not had anything to drink but it's because i did not get out of bed yep until the last possible

minute like i have like such a morning routine that like i have to turn the big light on as soon as i wake i get out of bed immediately because i have heartburn i need to sit up if i'm if i lay down for any any extra amount of time i will have to pop so many motherfucking dumbs so i need to sit up i need to get on the couch i need to turn the big light on and i need my coffee brought to me i need my breakfast brought to me and then i need to eat my meds and then i need an hour to process yep i need an hour to process and like become a human and the one time that like and i need to be able to have like enough time to poop i've got to have like all of that like stuff and there's one time where like i was like let me just see what happens i felt like a toddler

like the way that i was melting down and plus with pots i found out that like turns out my need for like an hour morning routine because i used to be able to just like wake up and like if i'm going to the gym like if i was going to go work out or take a class i know if i would just go to pilates and i would like you know i'd wake up i'd like brush my teeth i don't even think i would have coffee yet and I would go work out and then I'd come home and do all that if I tried to do that now but again turns out with pods I guess because you're laying down for so long you're so symptomatic right when you wake up that you like need to get the blood to the rest of your body so like they're like they recommend just like sitting up with your legs like extended you should get the kind of bed

I have yeah it probably would do wonders for you mom said that because that's what my morning routine is i set the alarm to go off an hour before i need to wake up because i will keep setting turning it off and i have it in increments of 10 minutes for me to just keep waking up and waking up and waking up are you a light sleeper no okay because i was gonna say that's a lot of because i'll just go back to sleep and just be asleep for the day you can immediately fall asleep after and then you have another 10 minutes like i would just still be awake no like that's incredible that you could fall back asleep then i hit the button on my bed to make me sit up and by the time the last alarm goes off i make it so that my lights are connected to the alexis so

because i also have what's darkening yeah so it's just dark in my room as it is yeah blackout curtains also my wall in my room is also black like this so it's just dark in there so do that hit the button then i have to check does it rise while you're sleeping no but i do it when i wake up like when i'm wake up wake up that's what i do i'm sure there's probably a way to do that if i want it to i could probably set use like an alexa plug to do it yeah but that would be no because i'm also sleeping i'm not sleeping on my back when i like go to sleep i'm sleeping on my side or my front so like that would just be awkward to rise like that yeah slide down right not even that but your body doesn't bend if i'm on my stomach my body doesn't bend like that what am i gonna do

like it'll throw your doggy style but then my neck is like no can't do that so then i do that go pee because i usually if i had a good night then i my bladder is full if i had a bad night where i've like coughed or something i've peed about 20 times already oh you you get up in the night to pee yes oh my god i i but it just but that's if i've been like coughing because i'm awake and then i'm like okay i have to pee now yeah go pee and that's usually a long gas pee hey i'm familiar with those then it's so cold if i have the strength like if i'm awake enough i'll go up these three flights of stairs to turn my air conditioner off that's crazy yeah and then you could just go back to sleep no because it's i'm now cold my body is shocked no after you've

walked up three flights of stairs could you get in bed and fall back asleep no okay because i'm cold now yeah because once i wake up i instantly get cold when i relax to go to sleep my body gets so hot that i'm sweating yep but when i wake up i'm freezing i'm frigid right now my nose is cold because it's so cold when i go to sleep i have to have it on 64 degrees when i go to sleep this is why when i show if depending on the time of day that i show up at your house it will either be the coldest thing ever or you will have the heat on and i'm like what the fuck is going on and it's like you've got your temperature regulation yes and it's important it's very important now i've started instead of turning the heat on because then it just because this is three levels it

takes so much time to cool the house down i just have a space heater to keep me warm in whatever room i'm in then i get on my phone and i'm checking emails i don't usually eat anything because when i was little when i had breakfast it would make me sick in the morning so i could never eat it so now i'm i'm up it doesn't make me sick the way but i think i've figured it was because i was having like milk and i can't have milk i know that now but you know when you're a they're like drink your milk because you gotta be strong so then i get up i'm already doing stuff and then i'll go i'll have some food but usually it's just like a protein shake from like cold press and then i do i go about my day but that like i have i have to i also have a routine but

it's very different than your routine wow it's but you said you're a deep sleeper yes that is like the luckiest thing in the world like i wake up every thursday and tuesday because it's watering days because i can hear our like i can hear our drip lines being watered and i will not be able to fall back asleep i have to like pile multiple pillows on my head mott's like what he was watering the lawn this morning and i woke up like in a bad mood because i could hear him yes what's wrong with me it's also a curse though like when i was getting like i fall if i'm lying down for a long time like when i got my lashes done and then i woke up because i was having a falling dream that was bad yesterday when i was also getting a massage in my mouth i had fell asleep at one time

too as my mouth is being massaged and i had a type of thing i'd be so afraid i'd accidentally bite them yeah i was afraid like even when like it was like she was like pinching so hard i was like i can't verbalize it so i'm just like i'm kind of just tapping her because yeah wrestling yeah i'm just like i'm tapping out and that's when she's like just breathe oh my god yeah i don't know if i could do that i'm like i'm like a dentist's worst nightmare because i have to take breaks you have to you can also you could tell her like i had told her that i want it she's like do you want it medium soft or hard but you're not gonna get any real results unless i do it hard well shit now i'm getting hard i gotta do it sometime yeah i'll do it after

i go to the dentist because and then i'll need to recover from the dentist my mouth will swell after the dentist because i've been holding it open for so long but uh oh my god there's a love island recoupling tonight yeah mary asked if i would watch it and i said no i'm obsessed with trinity and by the way remember that white guy who i said was like ugly not the one who looks albino who looks like uh escaped from like the um beauty product testing facility with rats no so but trinity's paired with this other guy and i boss was like you've done the biggest like 180 on him and then i saw someone else talk about it and was like okay everyone keeps talking about how we did the biggest 180 but like no one's talking about how they gave him a haircut on

episode three and i was like wait what and i looked and they usually wait because like they can have all of their like maintenance like beauties all of that appointments once a week on the off day and for him they brought it in like literally midweek and they gave him a haircut and i was like oh my god that that's what made the difference like that's what they did and he had pulled another girl for a chat who was like so not interested in him and everyone's like why would he do this it was so stupid like that he would do this this girl's obviously gonna reject him and everyone's like maybe producers told him he couldn't like lock it down with like trinity so early and he needed to pull someone so he picked the girl who's gonna be like what no i don't

imagine you that's very weird and like maybe that's why he picked her and everyone's like i think that they told him if he pulls kata he can get a haircut because he got a haircut right after and i was like that's some producing yeah i don't this season is way too like way too the way that speaking of hands and mouth one girl mods was like i think that's just how she's sleeping and i was like women don't sleep like that she was like in bed with the guy she's and she's there she's fish hooked her own mouth she's like and i was like what was she doing he as she says he was djing it oh and i go and you needed to fish hook your own mouth maybe that's her way to make it so she's not screaming it was so weird and it's like yeah because you look silly if you can't see it

it's like it's like in dark maybe she thought she was doing more of like a sexy i think that's what finger bite but it was going like a fixed it was the craziest thing i've ever seen and i was like and mom's just like my god she sleeps so funny and i was like oh she's not sleeping that's not sleeping that's that's that's the weirdness that's that's her being odd and them being you know um and he's the guy that they're uh oh i meant to show you him the women are like like goo goo gaga over this man when he first walked in and everybody was like they were giggling like kicking in a way that like i've never seen it was like michael b jordan just walked into the villa like they were like absolutely beside themselves and i was like i am are the rest of the men in

this villa like incredibly short because like i just like don't they were all like he's the hottest man i've ever seen and i was like okay well i think we're doing a lot there and then the guys were so insecure and one of the guys in there specifically is like objectively way hotter than him and like the rest of them like i would say like are decently on par with him and they were all freaking out but all these girls and i was like okay he must be so tall but he um everyone calls him uh chat gbt or uh corbin gbg i can't do the acronym corbin bt corbin gb whatever because he's very robotic and i don't know if you've heard anyone do the voice going ladies ladies but that's him and everyone's like he's like the hottest person they've ever seen and they keep

showing him at night because it's only a day behind so they know that everyone online is talking about how like this man like i think he's ai like i think he's like a robot he also someone has to how many kids he want he's at uh three people it's like three people okay um but then they've been showing him sleeping and it looks like he's sleeping with his eyes open and like this they're really leaning into it but i'm gonna send you a picture of him and tell me do you think he's like the hottest man you've ever seen corbin and he's he's jacked i will say that probably not because most of the people are children he is 22 yeah that's a child and he keeps talking about his business my niece is 19 i cannot look at like a man that is that age and be like that's a hot man

that's a child he photographs in one of these i'm like okay he looks quite handsome in one of them but um like i can say if he's handsome but i'm not yeah he's not gonna be hot he'll be a child but he just keeps talking about like how he's like really he's never been to a concert because he's really like business oriented and he just graduated college and i go what motherfucking business like you and he goes no i'm just about like i'm grinding and i'm like huh how i'm going to a lot of a lot of concerts coming up and i am very business i'm going to see kelly clarkson when i go to vegas while you're seeing hillary duff i'm gonna see alanis morissette okay what yeah she's doing just a like couple days of a concert are you a big alanis fan i like her music

i liked it a lot yeah and i haven't heard any in a long time but i think i only know ironic i know a bunch of them that's not till november but like november is gonna be my concert i'm seeing tlc and in vogue and salt and pepper you can really look at my age by looking at these concerts that i'm going to jay-z and then alanis morissette i told matz that you got the jay-z tickets and he was like oh and i go i know she he was like i i should i look and i go would have no if you i didn't know he would have been down well no but you were getting the cap yeah i did get a cap but i could have just gave him code i think i don't think it was a unique code oh okay because that's why i told him i was like no she was i she was at the cap of the ones that she

could get and he was like damn but um no he looks like a baby okay that looks like a child to me so that's what i said i also think he kind of looks like a like he's got like kid face like toddler face which one of the other guys in the villa has that too and like i'm not attracted to like toddler face and this other guy he was like oh my god my girl's gonna leave me and i was like you're objectively so much more fucking handsome oh yeah this is i know okay thank you i was like baffled to see when you showed me last week right because i was looking for k i looked up casey instead of kc yep so i was just like so fucking confused and i made i literally watched the episode moss had fallen asleep and i made him wake up and i made him the next night to watch

all of that because i was like i need to know what your reaction to this is and he was like okay does he have like pharom like what's going on when i tell you they were like panting they were all they literally were like i'm creaming my pants and i was like oh my god he just walked in and he's the way he when he talks like his sentence structure like he was um he said uh like what the hell are all you what the hell is your type or like what the fuck is all your type and like but says it in his really deep voice and he's trying so hard to put on that he's like mature and like you know whatever and i was like i just drop it i need you to drop it there's a there's a theory he's hiding an accent i gotta say though i obviously always i've never doubted that you

can't watch love island because you have your soaps on but i'm so behind on jeopardy that i was like there's no way you could ever watch show like more than one show that is on no like but also you have to remember when i watch reality tv i get so invested that i start taking on the personality of the people on the tv so i can't do that you have to like you have to really what uh what's that word disassociate vet them too especially you want to make sure it's and i and i that's why i don't watch any reality tv anymore yeah because yeah you don't you don't necessarily want to become those people right you can become trinity trinity's funny but then i take on the personality of like when you think of just generic love island that's what i would

become not just one person just an amalgamation of the concept of love yes that's so funny like when i was watching housewives i was just like wanting to fight with people because i thought it was entertaining just like one-liners constant buzz yeah wait i love that now now maybe i'm actually thinking i'm going to broach you to start getting back into reality tv no no no no well i love it okay all right i hope you all enjoyed we will see you on thursday where we will be talking about episode three of heated rivalry hell yeah bye bye this is a sister sign production hosted by me megan rinks and me melissa d montz plus diamond imprint productions post-production by coco lorenz production assistance by melanie d watson

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