Don't Blame Me! - FF: But Am I Wrong? Results: Ghosting Your Therapist

Episode Date: March 22, 2024

Meghan and Melisa share the result from But Am I Wrong: Ghosting Your Therapist. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right welcome to a brand new episode of fisting friday the fridays are ready to get fisted the fists are ready to get frided okay don't don't think too much no i did no it's everything like you put in an oven sizzle it cook it up serving it fresh i love how i can say literally anything and you can be like well no know here's the justification of the backstory that you and i both know i didn't have but now but now it's our backstory you know what it's like it's like there's a blank canvas and i just throw like a paint on color blotch on it and you go actually this is a whole tree and then you make all this and i'm like exactly for sure uh so we are going to be reading the results of last week's

episode um thank you all for being understanding that this went up late um we had a collective brain fart. And that happens. I've discovered it happens sometimes totally randomly, but the only time we really have collective ones, uh, is when we record twice in a week because we forget about what day of the week it is. And Monday, I was convinced it was Friday today. I was convinced it was Monday. As we were recording this, I was like, I feel like we just record it. Like, and we did, we just recorded a couple of days ago. So for some reason that doesn't click in our heads. um and so that's why it was up late because we were like melissa texted me she goes oh shit we forgot to do this and i was like oh damn might be so it went up late um we are at a full 20 hours

ago so we do appreciate um everyone who did vote thank you and i'm not gonna promise you it's never gonna happen again but you're on for the ride it will happen all right you're up buddy yep for episode 94 i hope i got that one right i could have lied about that number you gotta be right because we were getting close to 100 and we need to celebrate it properly it is 94 and it's right first up me Megan thinks 99% of TikToks are staged 96% said I'm not wrong 4% said that I am wrong and some people did like message I don't know if I screenshot any of it but being like I don't think 99% but like I think a vast majority and I was like you know that that was the caveat of what I gave it's I don't think people who are like crying over songs in their room being like

oh my god or like i just shit my pants like i don't think those ones are staged it's the the specific kind of to elicit a reaction like that reactionary content right no one wrote in all right melissa reminds us that the president is not a celebrity four percent said i was wrong 96 said i was not wrong okay i only click she is wrong because by definition he is considered one but i don't think any political figure or person in such a position of power should be treated as one worshipped over etc and i agree with her overall sentiment 100 is this too virgo of me and then they responded again and said not me wanting to unsend my reply but i can't because i feel annoying with my response i already screenshotted baby this has happened before

just know that like once the votes go up i'm already screenshotting as soon as i see something come in i'm screenshotting so if you have second thoughts you got to be quicker than me well or you have to be late enough for me because melissa gets the first ones that come out she's on top of it and i'm the one being like i just checked five seconds ago and i found this here so you know you got to get in the sweet spot so we we can give you the follow-up and i didn't sleep last night because i was on reddit trying to make vote uh swap so and everyone should know she did it i've completed it congratulations then we have writer number one who wants to take money out of anniversary money to go on a friend trip 67 said the writer's wrong 33 said the writer is

not wrong we had so many people writing with this one and i think like both like very much representing both sides not that i think you and i have totally opposite views but i think like you're more like sure and i'm like like we're just a little more on that side so someone said i definitely don't think that it would be wrong of the writer to use some of the anniversary trip money for the friend's birthday trip as long as it's put back in the anniversary fund quickly but I do wonder if the writer really wants to spend the money on the friend's trip or if it's just people pleaser tendency showing as Megan said because if it were me in the situation I would sure rather work those extra hours to be able to spend more money on my own trip rather

than my on my friends I feel the same way again depending on the budget like that's the whole caveat of all of it like if I'm gonna have to sacrifice on my own personal trip to then like not like live lavishly on this birthday trip to kind of like scrape by bare minimum i would have one great trip than like two but would you be working more hours if the trip what the friend trip was proposed no you'd still have the same budget she's only working more hours so that she can put the money back oh true i'm just thinking of like if i had to make up for it like how much I would have to it for me the whole thing boils down to how much it costs because like if I'm gonna have to sacrifice some of the money I would want to spend on my friend

on my personal trip because I might not be able to make it all back in overtime and then I'm like in a bad mood by the time I go on the trip or whatever then I'm like if I'm not having like a lovely luxurious experience on both trips for me I just rather save the money for one but also depends on the front yeah i've had fun friend trips in the last couple in the last couple years so if you wanted to go to kaba i would you would first ask me are you okay well no first i would say oh that sounds so lovely and then you'd hear a knock at your door and then i'd be like hello hello and i would be like we are gathered here today to do an exorcism because what fucking demon has gotten into your body that makes you want to go to Cabo and then I will pull up Expedia

Travelocity and I'll be like where do you want to go somewhere else message Sinitra since she is a travel agent and be like book us something else I go we'll tell her it's Cabo and then we'll blindfold you it'll be fun we'll drug you on the plane again nothing against Cabo it's just not for no it's just no and it's it's not it's you can do Cabo for not as much money but if you are like touristy touristy doing Cabo they will you will spend so much money and you do not have to like it's not it's it's not that I know people have spent as much like domestically traveling from like any spot in the U.S. to even people from California and they'll spend as much as a europe trip and i'm like are you kidding you don't have to okay um someone said i have fomo

i get it as long as she puts it back asap that's a part i didn't think of i do not have fomo so i know that's why i explained my part when we were doing the explanation yeah that's helpful because i'm like oh yeah i forgot about i don't have that um someone said if you discuss with your partner and you can repay it within three months and, or it is less than $500. Absolutely not wrong. I wholeheartedly agree with that one. I agree with Megan about not wanting to spend a ton on a friend's birthday though. Okay. I don't want anyone to think like I'm an asshole because if they didn't hear the original one, it's not that it's just a matter of like, I think that people asking you to spend, depending on how much it is like two grand

for a friend's birthday trip, it's too much money that it's like new year's Eve. You can't have as much fun as much money as you're spending and it will hurt your friendship um money is fungible i've never heard that word used outside of nfts well it's an economic term just because it's earmarked what the fuck okay this person i understand okay we've got a business school here money is fungible just because it's earmarked currently for the anniversary trip doesn't mean it can't be replaced but as i recall the writer is asking if they'd be wrong to do it they wanted to know if they'd be wrong to talk to their partner about it and to say I would and to that I would say absolutely not they are a team and maybe they can both come up with a

creative solution for the writer to go on both trips and or for both of them to replace any money moved from the anniversary pot um I feel like this is definitely a case-by-case basis but with what the writer said they would do and re-up the re-up what she reallocated for the friend trip I think that is okay I wouldn't stand in the way of my partner going on a friend's trip and I wouldn't want my partner to get in the way either as long as the writer puts all the money back all is gucci only wrong because i agree with megan that they might regret it after see i think it's a personality type that is like when you know yourself and you know you'll regret spending that much money uh okay so i feel like if the writer just did it with just did it then that

would be wrong always talk through with a partner first i think a discussion should be had with the partner before using any anniversary money and so long as she gets an agreement that she can replace the money in addition to how much she has to contribute in general she should be safe like y'all said she's wrong if she just takes it but it may not hurt to at least ask it in a safe way if she can pay back for the trip yeah i don't know if i said this but like without a doubt if this came up and like mots would be like he would make me go on the trip i would be he's like you have to go you like we'll figure like you gotta go you know so like at that point i probably if i didn't want to go if i like was like i don't want i just wouldn't tell him because he would be like

no you have to we'll figure it out i'll pay for you to go he loves going on friend trips though oh my god he loves french fries but you know he loves more than any he loves me getting a little treat because like I'm not a little treat person like that like I'm very frugal like anytime he leaves the house he's like I got you a little drink I got you and I'm like okay like we're out somewhere we're at Lowe's he goes do you want a drink and I'm like no I'll just have my water and he's like you're like his favorite thing is when I'm like I kind of want fries he'll be like I want let's go get like he loves because he loves a little treat and he loves when I do a little tree with him and it's he's he's very sweet he loves um he loves he loves people doing what

he's doing at the same time he's a a cool uh mirror yeah exactly and then we've got writer number two who wants to ghost their therapist 12 said the writer's wrong 88 said the writer is not wrong how i did the scooby dooby doo theme song not even thinking i love that i ghosted a horrible couples therapist my solo therapist said i should let her know what didn't work for us in an email or something but i couldn't just do it i had the opposite my couples i couple therapist was like you need to break up with your solo therapist and you should tell her and then i said i'm just gonna ghost her and then i went back and she was like that's fine i don't care uh someone said i

only voted the writers wrong because i follow a therapist on youtube who said ghosting can cause logistical problems for therapists i don't remember exactly what though actually if the therapist isn't being respectful then it doesn't really matter why help them out if they aren't doing their job ghosting is applicable sorry i really had to talk that through understandable babe without of time understandable. I am also a verbal processor, which sometimes evolves into a typing processor. And then someone else said, I feel like sending a little message being like, Hey, I've been doing really well during your leave. And I feel I don't need regular therapy sessions anymore. I'll reach out if things change would be a nice courtesy since it's

a care provider instead of a friend and they had a good relationship. If it was a shitty friend or a shitty care provider, I feel like ghosting is 1000% warranted. Maybe this is my anxiety talking, but I feel like I wouldn't want to worry my therapist and I would want to keep a positive relationship in case I needed them again in the future. It's not a good fit, though. That's the difference. None of our therapists that listen to the show wrote in.

I'm curious about your thoughts. Maybe they can't share them. Yeah, and actually, yeah, maybe it's that. though i do think um it's always a it's a courtesy you know like in that and i i stand by what i said that like you can reply if they reach out but i don't think it's on you to like preemptively do x y and z because like when you take a long time off like a lot of people need to then go see a different therapist in the interim that can't be without therapy for that long so yeah then we have my wrong of the week I nominated savory fig 96% said savory fig is wrong 4% said savory fig is

not wrong just so everyone knows as a double clarification savory fig yes is in fact the manufacturer who not the manufacturer it's a fucking person who went to Dunkin Donuts and was passing them off as like their own creation not the gluten-free uh vegan allergen um storefront who is was selling them without knowing what they were actually selling so that answers a couple of the ones who responded um 96 said savory fig is wrong four percent said savory fig is not wrong um everybody just responded saying they are so wrong they were the supplier if they're a supplier i'm remembering correctly they are indeed definitely wrong my wrong of the week was michael maiden who's wrong 99 said that maiden's wrong one percent said that maiden is not wrong

did you see the response that someone had let me get on over there someone said i did not remember this one and usually i don't vote if i don't remember but i saw an old white dude so i took my chances saying he is wrong facts and that makes me happy to hear because i have a protocol when posting people who are horrible in this that i'm not picking glamour shots of them i'm not picking any of those things i think it should accurately represent what they did what they who they are like to give you a vibe of them and they don't get the they don't get the glitzy glamour version this is the only fucking photo i could find of him that would like actually cut out the rest is like one of him at like a museum or something and it's just you can't even see any

of it and i was worried that he's in a suit but i'm really glad that what prevails is the old white man you can't you can put an old white man in a suit still an old white man there's just a look in their eyes yeah this is we had a talk i talked about this at my hairstyle like at my hair salon with my hair stylist and we were talking with everybody and collectively was me her and this middle-aged woman and all three of us together we're like I would have killed him she's like I would have gone to jail and I would have murdered that man and my husband would have had he I told him I said honey you're gonna have to take care of the kids and he said he would kill him and I said okay fine I'll clean up the body and I was like great this is me bonding with this

woman I've never met good to know you're on the same page kill this man exactly we weren't on the same page about a lot of other things i kind of figured that of course all right well thank you for listening tune in on monday for a fresh episode of don't blame me tuesday for see you next tuesday and then back on thursday for a brand new but am i wrong and i gotta say it's one of my favorite episodes that we've done we went in it was good all right we will tap back later Thank you.