Don't Blame Me! - FF: The Flavorful Duo

Episode Date: September 27, 2024

Join your hosts, Meghan and Melisa, for a hilarious and juicy episode! In this week's installment, we dive deep into the culinary world and beyond. First up, Meghan schools Melisa on the iconic Ina Garten, while Melisa confesses some questionable Food Network favorites. Then, we discuss the surprising resurgence of Sandra Lee and share our latest food obsessions. But the fun doesn't stop there! Meghan recounts a hilarious day-mare, and we continue our love affair with Dancing with the Stars (even though we aren't watching it). Next, we get into the world of gymnastics and the incredible Gold Over America tour. And finally, we express our desire to see Sabrina Carpenter live in concert and discuss her recent collaboration with the legendary Christina Aguilera. Get ready for a wild ride filled with laughter, food talk, and celebrity gossip! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

it's fisting friday gotta get fisted on friday don't pretend oh no you can see the mess behind me no what who can see the mess behind you i can and you can i actually can all i can see is a closet perfect so um is there rebecca black stan account okay why are you so quiet i have nothing to say no no audio wise well i had turned it down because i was hearing myself too much okay here is it better for you now slightly hello oh i'm turning the wrong thing i'm turning my volume yeah you sound hello hello yes there you go perfect i'm like you're like i have nothing to say i'm like no no like decibel level it's quite low sorry that's okay welcome to fisting friday while we while we know where we are going to catch up even though we also talked yesterday

because every time i try to tell you something yesterday you said save it so rude i'm sorry but we gotta keep this content juice running even though even if you would have told me we still would have had plenty to talk about but i don't even remember what i was trying to tell you yesterday we were we started talking about aina gardner yeah and you keep calling her edna yeah but you made a note i did i wrote down that we were going to talk about aina garden about how she recently revealed that her and jeffrey almost got a divorce and that she could never understand why people had kids because she had like such a miserable and unhappy like childhood and like why she wouldn't want to like put that on kids and then realize that other people didn't

have that and i was like aina we have so many things in common crazy um but i wanted to talk about her presidential vibe era yeah i can't believe you didn't like that was a recent discovery for you because i don't i don't pay attention to her oh i i never keep i never take my eyes off of that woman she has a pilot certificate you can get a lot of shit done when you don't have kids she was originally employed by the federal power commission and later at the white house office of management and budget eventually she was assigned to the position of budget analyst uh she entailed writing the nuclear energy budget and policy papers on nuclear centrifuge plants for president ford and carter you know i don't just like this bitch

because i like her chicken like i like what she stands for i like her vibe i like her attitude i like her candor and um i love her fucking origin story yeah yeah she's a wildly interesting person with like a very interesting life and even jeffrey jeffrey still teaches and like i don't know who he is at all he's when i say like i will find a recipe on the internet i don't think i've ever watched the bear well you're not a food network i was oh what would you watch her are you gonna reveal i don't want to say who i watch are you gonna reveal who you problematic that's actually quite the understatement are you gonna reveal who your food network girl is there's several that are problematic that i'm not going to discuss pick

the number one actually if you rank them it might be it might be in the timeline of their controversies the thing is my top two are extremely problematic they're they're the ones that are take a guess everybody take a stab where did melissa grow up look one of them makes excellent dessert well both of them make excellent desserts one of them makes excellent cuisines both of them have staple recipes that i who wait who's your second one alton brown oh i always forget about that also because i never felt bamboozled by him do you ever watch him in the um what's it called uh it wasn't him but it was supposed to be him or was it him oh the old who does he look like now he looks like someone i don't know there's some other there's some other person who he like looks

like and um i always thought that alton brown was like a full-blown scientist like bill nye maybe i don't know but whatever it was that like i always bill nye do have the same type of energy yeah it might have been that and so i was like not him no not at all yeah he always comes from a science-based background which when a white man is too into science but bill nye is so into science you have to remember that i grew up watching bill nye and so they have very similar energies yes well bill not a science guy to me he's teaching us science but the cooking aspect of the science part like this like he's he he does deliver you great recipes he's but i'm a science person so no exactly yeah i'm saying like that's why like he's great but it's one of those

things where it's like he's not giving us the warm and fuzzy feeling um he's given us the the science-based back but did you watch his old stuff it was warm and fuzzy mixed with the science oh really because i've only ever seen the show where he like really just breaks everything down it's like really like clinical no he had it's like a lot of high energy him like showing things to the camera oh maybe that's why i did get him and bill and i confused yeah yeah so yeah old white lady desserts hit different and also sciencey desserts also hit different but now i've i've used my science background and perfected his cinnamon roll recipe that is a good recipe yeah and but now i've i showed you how big my mind got um christmas and i made gluten-free ones that tasted just

oh yeah it didn't meaning i want to make some yeah um it just takes they take forever to make yeah um but him and paula dean and the thing with paula dean is that you look at paula dean and you know that she's racist there's nothing about her that ever told me that she was not racist but being from the south you kind of just coexist with those people yeah and um you know that they suck but they have things to share and people are like this because she puts butter in so much thing yeah because butter is delicious in a dessert when you are eating a dessert you're like oh this is so buttery and fluffy where do you why do you think it's like that that's a butter old white lady desserts hit different i remember one time i said i can't believe pauline dean

hasn't like the fact that like she's still doing stuff and you said whoa whoa whoa i don't want her to go away totally and you were just like she doesn't need a show but like no i don't take away the recipe stuff you're like don't take away her platform that far i was like oh my god this is how i discover that you're apologizing i am not apologizing but you said the same thing that you were just like i just she's like i you were like i just don't know why anyone would have been confused and it's just like i'm accepting that that's who she is because i never felt i never felt deceived by her whatsoever but like why are you then going to punish us and take away her recipes right and they're still i think they went away for a brief moment on food network but

they're all back up now yeah you know who they take talk is having a renaissance with is my other food network girl sandra lee semi-homemade and she's making new videos now too she is like those are the two polar opposite ends of my taste so we find a garden who is someone i actually trust who makes like delicious food who has a refined palette who is literally refuses to have any guests on her show refuses to do any of the gimmicks she said take it or leave it you can come into my home we will shoot in my site i'm not going on location nowhere the only people we're inviting over is my three gay friends there will be no children present at any time and we're cooking the same thing for jeffrey every single week we're gonna redo the same recipes and the

food network is like okay if you insist and then you have sandra lee who says chaos i'll do whatever you want for money and they said what if we do an episode themed around cranberries and she said sure and they said make something inedible and she goes perfect can't do that like the way that she's never questioned like anything they've told her to do they say jump she says how high also the way that she she's like we're gonna pour a little alcohol in here and she pours a whole bottle for a punch uh-huh almost how do you think she gets through these work days of them making her make these play-doh recipes she looks great no she looks gorgeous and she sells it which i'm like the fact that she should have gotten so much more work purely from her roles on the food network

to be like she is selling a fantasy she's like put her on the fucking victoria's secret runway this is just selling a fucking fantasy and it's so like it's delusional and we all know it and she's like it's fucking hilarious and i like i love it and i think that we need both of those things on the food network and those are my two favorite mods refuses to watch he hates her why because it stresses him out oh and i'm like well you're not supposed to eat it you're supposed to laugh you're supposed to laugh see and the thing is like aina is so calm that it stresses me out i'm like do something excite me if you watch her full show you'll see certain times where she's like now we're gonna pour half a cup in and she goes that was a little more than half a cup oh

it'll be fine but my favorite is when she talks about children and she was like my friends are coming over because none of us have kids and we can actually do fun things like she's like subtly so shady and so funny and then the best part is is she'll make something that's like so complicated and then she'll go how easy was that and then she looks at you going like it wasn't easy at all like it's just funny like and she's so set in her ways which i respect too like she's so committed to only doing what she wants to do she cannot be produced and i love that versus sander lee industry plant the wall yeah full industry plant and i love that that's like my one of my favorites um so i i'll try and find some good aina

videos of like her being funny so you can watch those that's unnecessary okay that's fair that's like the life i want to lead though like i know it's my dream it's my dream do you want to hear about my nightmare no can i please tell you absolutely not no no it's not a nightmare that happened um when i was sleeping it's uh just being a bitch some i know it's something that happened when i was awake so day nightmare no it's actually unfortunately just called my reality a day mirror so see i'm even questioning if i want to bring it up because right now there's only two people in the world who know that this happened and so i'm doing a very good job at forgetting and it has existed okay we can cut it out if it's too much

so yesterday well i'll just give a little backstory we've had some mice oh god and we all know what that means yeah asterisk but we're not calling them that because once we get to this story it's actually really even harder for me to swallow that so um i've been telling lots that we should get some more mousetraps like they're not up in the house at all now knock on wood um but i can hear through like the vents i can hear them in our uh garden level like our quote-unquote basement or whatever down there and i told him i was like oh last time i was down there or last time he was down there he saw one in one of the traps and i was like we need to get some more traps and i can hear them kind of like rustling around sometimes late at night and um he went to

go grab the laundry and he was like i saw one down there you're right i'm gonna go get some more traps and then he saw he saw one climbing up a tree and um i think i might have to turn to arson and burn our entire home and all of our trees to the ground because what do you mean i could just be thank god it was at night they're not doing it during the day but like if i looked up in a canopy of trees thank god the arborists are here today and i just saw a rat i would have to end it all like i'm just not okay and that paired with the fact that when i was replanting a couple things in the garden because i was like oh no these are like you know i they weren't doing as well and i was like i need to like readjust the position

of them and i saw some grubs disgusting and turned out found out that those are what the giant fig beetles turn into like that's what where they come from so i've been picking them out of the garden and throwing them uh turns out that mole rats as well as the second half of that word will go and dig in your planters to try and eat those so nature is beautiful i love my garden but boy oh boy am i happy that i have my beekeeping suit and i don't think i'm going to be taking it off at any time soon so do you think that the um you were talking about how they were getting to your figs do you think it's actually the rats that were getting to your figs no those are that that was squirrels because i could see the squirrels okay um and the fig tree

is not not to be terrifying to everybody uh in regards to size the fig tree is actually not strong enough to withstand these um the stockiness of the rats it's a little too willowy um but thankfully this is like just this is like a new thing and it's also mostly because i think the fact that it's been getting cold at night again and that's like when those bitches come out to play so so what are we doing now we're getting traps we got our trees trimmed and that's the whole thing we knew we needed to get our trees trimmed because we've had like just random animals like crawling on the roof because all of our trees right now have formed a canopy and they all connect so you can go from one tree to another tree to another tree all the way to the house to

the garage to all of that and so we've now trimmed them all so you can't just leap between um and the other thing we're doing is forgetting about it okay so and for the grubs i don't fucking know i'm having to go through an event individually like take each everyone all of them out and then i have to plant things that like hopefully deter them okay being crunchy and granola is just like not for the week and i'm not crunchy or granola at all i'm sorry you're not crunchy or granola but when you said crunchy i was just thinking about the groves because in lion king when timon and pumbaa are eating it that's all i think about most i've eaten them before which is why i'm having a hard time reconciling with that in ecuador oh

and i don't know those grubs so those groups are very different to me but now that i start eating them no no no no unless we can't no no we actually can't we can't we can't we can't notice that we actually can't because i ate i made a dense bean salad yesterday and i have been dealing with the diet yes but also anytime i am excessively pooping there's a little bit of nausea and i don't want to lean into that okay so those are my updates for you it's been a it's been a time how are you i'm fine um yeah not great but i'm fine some bad stuff happened this week yep um some heartbreaking things happened this week and um i'll leave it at that your playlist might get you through the workday but have you ever wondered how your ancestors

spent theirs what work helped them build a life how did they adapt as the world around them changed With Ancestry, you can search select historical occupational records for free for a limited time and discover the stories behind the jobs in your family tree. You've got questions. We've got ancestors. Search free until August 31st. Visit Ancestry.ca for details. Terms apply. Should we talk about our king on Dancing with the Stars? Who's our king on Dancing with the Stars?

i know who our queen is but who's our king oh sorry bitch we've been talking about him all day i i would think about him where's papa the grandfather reginald val johnson is almost making me start watching dancing with the stars yeah what a sweet man a kind sweet man he looks like i'm remembering what happiness is like like i'm looking at him going like i gotta get my life together because i actually haven't felt like this in so long like he is beaming with joy and he's having so much fun and i will say like that does make me a little emotional because there are some celebrities who go on dancing with the stars and they have so much fun and then i have to grapple with the fact that like they can't do this forever

like yeah this is just a moment in time and it's devastating and i want to know how do you feel about the fact that your guy has actually never been on dancing with the stars dbd dick because like he has an unfair advantage no no he actually has all of those dancers has like studied him yes so um yeah it wouldn't be fair they put britney from glee when she was on glee i mean they put heather like heather yeah heather morris on it but i specifically mean i think she was still playing or she was fresh off britney fresh off from glee so like she was fresh off uh she wasn't even rusty like she was sure she was rusty being a beyonce backup dancer but she was not rusty from the uh what do they call them the cheer cheer girl cheerios

cheerios sick love that yeah um yeah i just think it'd be i mean we'd all tune in we all would the world would it would be called dancing with the star stars universe and he would be too good and he would win and he would make everybody else too nervous and they'd all be just like gushing over him the whole time he would go guys guys guys i'm just like all of you we're just here to dance and then he'd do his shoulders like shrug them up and do a little goofy move and then twist around i love him i love that you love him anna delvey got off already dude it was actually unsettlingly weird to watch her on that and like i said it from the beginning like specifically as people who live in california which is like a huge immigrant population the fact

that she called up ice and was like hey can i like stay for all that like and they're like sure fucking insane like fucking insane to me um and then for her to like be truly so ungrateful but also what's her name garner the girl who played her not not victoria garner um julia julia julia garner may you always be famous because the fact that i had a hard time remembering that that was on an actress playing anna delvey that was anna delvey herself i was waiting for anna chlumsky whatever the for her to like pop out and be like this was all just a bit we're doing this is season two and she was like shondaland writes the next season and it includes this i would die for that or if it's just like one episode like it's like a

a holiday special a mirrorball special like it was just crazy and you would think that after there have there's literally been a dramatized version of you that was a hit television show that showed you like very few people can actually watch their actions very few people can like watch how people perceive them to stand in it and go no that's just who i am and i'm not changing for anybody i'm like what did we think we were getting out of this i don't know um and she's so nonchalant about everything and i'm like i know i'm chill but like how i need to know if there's been some assistance but that's how she always is i know and i'm like like from jail she was the same way so i just think that's how she is wow um i wonder what her resting heart rate is like four

like it's just negative four yeah like it's just like hello like hello man but she's out so quickly so quickly um and i like pummel horse boy yeah he's committing he's very much committing he's really committing and also it is um and i don't this is not i don't say this to be uh i mean anything negative but uh it is so interesting to see a male gymnast in the wild because so often like we see like female gymnasts and i also just understand women's bodies more the way that when this man sometimes does these dances i go i don't know if those legs are going to be able to hold you up like he is his art he's so strong like his upper body is so incredibly strong and the way he moves

likes is so quick and i'm like holy shit like i'm just waiting for him to topple over because i'm like he won't he's so aware of his body and all of that but like you don't see like they don't get to do their little dancey dance moves and like your hot take saying like we need a little bit more of that in it i was like turns out they can actually give it to us i didn't i didn't believe that they necessarily could and he is showing they can you should have believed black women first of all but second I specifically meant him but um I I knew he could do it um I'm happy have you seen this like I don't know the name of it but it's like a traveling gymnast concert that's going on oh that's been around I I'm aware I just didn't think that yeah you

want to head to the staples center and watch them do i just didn't think that simone and jordan would participate oh no they do we can we can head on over to la live and see them do your chango double twist yes no it's it's remarkable it's um what is it called it's a olympian go for the goal yeah something like that yeah no they've they've been doing this um they also do uh they did one for figure skating which made a lot more sense to me the first time i ever saw videos of this touring um gymnastics where there's mood lighting and i was like is this safe to have mood lighting when they're doing a vault like that's a little crazy um but you see them just like flip around and it's kind of like just watching pe class and i like kind of loved

that i'm like someone's like i don't want to go to all these football games let me go do something no let me go flip around in like random gymnasiums gold over america exactly i was like it's something dramatic like that but like she like just goes to like gymnasiums and like iowa does a couple backflips to like some good music and like bitches lose their minds yeah i love that for them um and it literally says starring Simone Biles yes it it truly is starring Simone Biles what a time well they also do Dancing with the Stars goes on tour well I know that that makes sense to me I think Reginald's really excited for that part I would cry I would cry he has like no idea how famous he is should we go see the um Gold

over america it's not coming here i already looked it's not if it did it already came i was like there's no way they skiffed us they definitely started here then yeah it's not nowhere close to us damn sponsored by powerade and k18 nice sponsors guys the rest of them i don't know wow wow wow is jordan still in school is she done she's uh no no she's still in she's going back let's go what to ucla meet them i would those i know they're long no no no listen i'm i'm not i'm saying i would go because they're long but but in the city of los angeles those bitches have fantastic musical tastes so not only will we enjoy the songs that they're doing it to the in between songs i'm like we're coasting we're totally solid and it's going to

be so fucking good and i don't know if there's been a year that's gone by where at least one ucla gymnast hasn't done a beyonce medley and a lot of times it's jordan no i know i was like they just they've never stopped they've been like we respect her here as a bruin we are a part of the beehive and i i could see it let's see how much the tickets for gold of america is how much are these girls making well i clicked to see and it's and it prompted me to say are you a real fan why has this why are they questioning you there are several reasons why this could have occurred it's like i don't i don't understand what speaking of a tour i really want to go see but i like don't know if i'm ready to like

shell out the money but mots is like you know someone who loves gift giving he's like we should do it the sabrina carpenter yeah i enjoy her i she's creating a theatrical experience it's been watching clips it's so cute and then have you seen her in uh christina aguilera yeah it did yep and i am so happy for her i'm happy that she's hanging out with her mom as she was so excited to be there and that's all anybody should be saying because she's just happy to be there not just happy she's ecstatic she's ecstatic to be there and i think the fact that we're coming for her and i go well there's a reason why she's excited to be there we're all aware we're all aware nobody is delusional in thinking this don't engage with the stans who

are trying to claim x y and z okay yep she's happy to be there let her be happy to be there christina aguilera also looked genuinely happy that she's there i know and like i don't want to hate to everybody i don't want to sound surprised but no i'm surprised because she i've heard on record yes record she almost did the j-lo level interview of saying like i've heard her talk about people and then i've heard so many people saying like the worst celebrity experience that they've had was with her so i was shocked i was shocked the only time i've ever heard people who have good celebrity experiences is with her people going well i just want to go like well i wasn't expecting anything because she doesn't have to be nice to

me um but yeah i and when i say people say it's their worst celebrity experience these are also celebrities yeah britney spears is not just her there's so many who else everyone else but she reminded me hates her yeah no pink hates her pink hates her hard yeah um pink also hates a lot of things um but uh there it gives that reminiscent of that j-lo interview when she was like salma a whore a stupid bitch yes like she goes goes through the list like christina galera has almost done that i don't even think andy likes her like andy cohen no andy cohen's talked bad about yeah i was gonna say and that is someone who like likes shady bitches when people are on and they have a christina aguilar story oh he wants to tell the toe he literally is a giddy little boy going

like we gotta talk about it like yep fanning them covering his mouth like he's so shocked he ignores the other guest and he goes i'm so sorry we have a fellow christina hater in the building step aside and then it's like let's talk about how big of a bitch she is and that's the thing like i firmly believe if you are talented i don't need you to be nice no and but you have to have this a level of talent and you have to be like funny mean and also like you can't be like a nazi like it can't be from like a place of like specific aimed prejudice it has to come from a place of I'm just a cunt with her though I she idolizes Cher yeah and I think she's trying to be Cher but Cher just exists Cher's aloof that's the big difference there's a difference but she

tries to be aloof too yeah at some points but you're just you're not Cher just be Christina and at this point christine is just christine and that's and she's carving her own little niche which is impressive in itself because i think you can choose two one of two diva paths you can choose a mariah carey diva path or okay well there's i would go three yeah well i was gonna say you could do uh like the old school you could do a share you could do um oh my god what's her name um um diana ross avida madonna no the one who originated the role and who hates on it patty lapone okay so i was gonna say you could be share you could be a patty lapone and then you have mariah carey who's an in-between she's still shady like patty lapone but she is

actually aloof when it comes to certain things and she'll be intentionally pretending to be aloof but also people love her well exactly because she has the talent to back it up uh but like people love her personality whereas christine aguilar nobody loves her personality no because unfortunately she started beefing with britney spears when they were about uh seven and a half years old and that just felt a little odd because it wasn't like we were having patty come after madonna yeah doing a video version we actually have um the girls fighting over justin timberlake at the mickey mouse club like and then you would think that we would grow out of that and then we didn't and that was the part that was a little surprising but her talent

kept increasing and so now I'm fine yeah I've always been fine because I'm like just people can be people but it's just funny how it's how people try to emulate certain people and they try too hard and the one version is likable and the other version isn't but no I and I just like Sabrina Carpenter pat yourself on the back because I've actually never seen Christina Aguilera look happy me either i've never seen that girl she's literally sitting at first of all i saw the video of them first where she was like i'm with my mom and i was like oh like christina actually you take a picture with her yeah okay cool but then i didn't know it was a whole no it was a production performance and then when i had a call videos of them sitting next to each other on a couch

with microphones and i was like she actually likes her because like christina doesn't do this for anyone no the closest i've seen was her talking to kelly clarkson and that's because she wasn't looking at kelly clarkson with contempt she wasn't looking at her with adoration or love she also doesn't know a single kelly clarkson song i promise you she probably had some in her earpiece learned about it before but like she clearly didn't want to piss christina like kelly Clarkson off like she was like I have no problem with this girl but the fact that to me I went holy shit Christina Aguilera is a sweetheart to then go to Sabrina Carpenter I was like wow I didn't know he'd get better than saying essentially giving off the vibe of I don't actively hate

this woman to then going like she was smiling at her she wasn't even sneering at her no it was an earnest genuine smile Sabrina Carpenter you have been blessed like no one will be able to tell me shit after that like sabrina said jesus was also a carpenter and clearly she's been anointed god bless america and god bless the sweetener from the uh oh not sweetener sorry that's ariana grande it's short and sweet sorry ariana is also short and yeah and she's carving a whole other sector for her personality but mariah loves ariana exactly because she's a mariah variant all right okay bye