Don't Blame Me! - Flew Out For Friend's Bridal Fitting

Episode Date: April 13, 2026

In this episode, Meghan and Melisa give advice having hard conversations in friendships. They also discuss going to space camp, eyesight, Jeopardy!, Easter plans, Juggalos, Bridgerton (per usual), and Elena Taber drama. Join our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/dontblameme Subscribe to But Am I Watching? Apple  Spotify Subscribe to Don’t Blame Me! Apple Spotify Call In for DBM - 310-694-0976 (3 minutes or less) Write In for DBM - [e-mail] (300 words or less) DBM Submission Form Buy Our Merch https://crowdmade.com/collections/sister-sign Follow Us! instagram.com/meghanandmelisa @meghanrienks instagram.com/meghanrienks https://twitter.com/meghanrienks @sheisnotmelissa instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa instagram.com/diamondmprint.productions Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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You're richer than you think. hello hello welcome to a brand new episode of don't blame me welcome we hope you are having a great day here wherever you are wherever you're listening are you listening from california like me or maybe you're listening from where melissa's recording in arkansas and if i Not if my audio does sound different. So we just had some technical difficulties, some logistical issues here. We're just going to roll with it. Would love for you to keep listening. But, you know, if you're like, I can't I can't bear to hear the difference in your voices, then I understand. in just give it give it a give it a good college try like give it just try it out and see because you should also know that i'm also being an incredibly brave soldier because if you think the audio you're listening to for melissa sounds wonky you don't even know what i'm hearing you

don't even know what i'm hearing so just know that we can all be brave here together so we can gossip and talk about things your makeup looks nice thank you i don't know why this text message just can't came through when i was on do not disturb but you know we're just we're just living life you know we're rolling with the punches we are rolling your makeup also looks good oh thank you so much i have run out of so many things that it like forces me to try other stuff that i have and then i go oh kind of love this like this is this is great yeah i have a lot of things that you've given me because I couldn't possibly use that much in a while because it's a lot and I'm really only wearing makeup when we do this and then if I go somewhere on the weekends I'm not

in an office every day where I need to zhuzh it up so I have a ton of makeup but I did run out of foundation I'm kind of just scraping the insides right now but it's ready at Sephora I'm going to get it done. Nice. Nice. Yeah. I was wearing a lot of makeup this weekend because I ran out of my contacts and was forced to wear glasses again. And of course, reverted to being like an absolute miserable person because I love glasses for other people. And it's not even like an aesthetic thing for me. It's the fact that like I need to take them off to look at something up close. So I'm. Yeah, you need bifocals, as I've been saying for probably a good 10 years. No, exactly. And so the issue is, is that like, in fact, I just leave my glasses everywhere. So like, I just don't really wear them. And then I'm blind. And then I'm pissed because I can't see anything. And like, the world is like depressing, because I'm just like, I'm fumbling around. And I'm being completely helpless because I'm not putting the glasses on and then I'm losing

my glasses. And so I was like, okay, I'm putting makeup on. And I'm like, going to feel cute and make an outfit styled around my glasses so that I won't just keep taking them off and forgetting where I put them. So I did some makeup this weekend, but now I have my contacts and I am thrilled. For both eyes, right? For both eyes. Daily contacts are wonderful, but my God, they're expensive. They are pricey, but I was not able to wear contacts this comfortably when i was not wearing daily so i will say price now someone who does not know your struggle my optometrist said everybody's eyesight starts going when they're 35 and i've i'm well over that so you know i think i might be good for years wait is yours just not

going at all no so like that's so unfair because like mine is getting work like not only did i started from glasses to contacts to LASIK to back to contacts like the other night I was like panicking laying in bed because I was like we turned the lights off and it was like suddenly so dark and I was asking lots like how many fingers am I holding up and he was like three and I was like I can't even see how many fingers I have and I was like freaking out because I'm like I'm losing because like that's one of the things they talk about like low light vision like going even worse and I was like panicking because it's already not good and then he goes well are your contacts in and i said no okay thank god thank god so um yeah but i do worry that my

visions just to keep getting worse and worse i'm gonna be like that i mean it will and you know at least i'm tall now but like you know i inevitably will shrink and i'll be that like old white lady with very white hair and those thick glasses which they of course will be red because that's who i'm destined to evolve to be yeah you've already decided that so i mean i don't think i decided it i think that the universe decided it for me like that's just who i am and who i'm gonna be it's my destiny well anyways welcome to a brand new episode of don't blame me where we give you wonderful amazing life-changing advice and we've been doing this for a while so we have a track record 2017 next year's your 10-year anniversary i think 2017 i may be off but

i think that's right 10 years never say that again never say that again i'm just saying it's crazy that's i just i really in all honesty subtract four years for the pandemic thank you because i think that's a very like that's the least we can do the absolute bare minimum and i think that like our fertility should also hear that i think like so many other things in life should like also hear that our taxes like we shouldn't have to pay taxes for those for you like so much speaking of we have to pay our taxes next week but it's my account's been working on it yeah we just got to pay the estimate i just keep getting texts from moths in the middle of today being like send me a picture of this thing and i'm like okay and i'm like well yeah that's one

thing we don't have to worry about yeah we just have to pay it perfect that's fine wonderful wonderful well you can't share why you're there yet can you i mean if you want to know why i'm here just look on my instagram it'll be up by the time this comes out perfect perfect perfect well if you want to call in and get some advice from us you can leave us a voicemail 310-694-0976 and if you are an international if you're an international listener or if you are uh just wanting to send a voice memo send us a voice memo to meganpodcast at gmail.com for both of those you have to keep it under three minutes and if you don't want your voice to be heard that way but you would instead like to be you know you you want the written word you want us to read your

words you can send it to the same email you can send us to a dm or the easiest way to do it fill out the form please but it's just do that one it's so simple maybe we'll eventually get rid of the other ones minus the calls i love the calls i wish more people would call but you guys are What a fucking scaredy-cats. Yeah. Why are you scared? Why are you scared? What have you been up to?

Me? Yeah, you. What have I been up to? Well, after years of telling Mott's not-so-subtly that I would love for him to do an Easter egg hunt for me. Not that I needed to have anything in the eggs, but, like, just hide things and then tell me how many there are and I can find them. And it doesn't have to be, like, a day. Like, you can just do it at some point. as a kid like I literally used to like find ones like months later I love finding things you know

me of a puzzle and so I was like if you ever want to do that I would love that if you ever want to do that I would love that and so then on Easter he was like well I have a surprise for you and I was like what and he hands me an egg and I was like oh my fucking god and this whole time happening well this whole time I've been saying like I don't need candy in it I don't need anything in it I don't need there to be something at the end of it like I just want to know how many eggs there are and I'll find them like that is like quite literally I'm like a dog like quite literally that to me is like so fucking fun so that's what I thought we were doing and then it turns out he wrote like riddles in them oh I was like oh my god okay some of them though that's my nightmare

to be honest I hate riddles but I know that you like them but I hate I hate riddles with a passion I will say um my favorite part was at least two of them I was reading them and then I was like oh perfect it's this thing and he went oh i've i wrote it wrong and i was like okay so it's like okay wrong one or like we're going to this something plant and i was like we don't have a plant that's called that and he was like we don't and so then i'm like coming up with other plants that like give the same vibe so that honestly made it more fun and then i get to the last egg which inside of the egg is like a bigger piece of paper and again i'm i'm not it i open it two tickets to hillary duff concert i was like you wanted to go so bad i cried i

because i was so shocked and overwhelmed that's a great easter egg hunt that's a great thing that he did that's so sweet no like like i and he was like why are you crying and i was like i'm just like this is like i've never been this like this is such total shock like i had no clue this was leading to anything at all and it's specifically the one that's in uh at red rocks in colorado which i've always wanted to go to yeah you talked about it on the podcast yeah and i'm like holy shit and i'm so when are you going in july i've never been to colorado in the summer like apparently it's beautiful and like apparently they have trees with leaves on them which i've literally never fucking seen so i'm so excited so everybody will be having spring break july

27th through 31st no episodes sorry we're having fun did i say spring break instead of summer break you know what i meant but we're not taking a summer break huh you said spring but i was saying we're not taking summer break i mean we're not taking a spring break so that's our spring break but it also happens to be summer break yeah it's our vacation so that was like my lovely wonderful easter that i was like so i love that so excited about and why don't you i know that the children are jewish but also they are gentile as well half gentile do they just not do it they're exponentially more jewish okay because also like we're their dad he's not religious or any yeah but i mean easter could just be doing eggs like you guys did you know to be fair maybe i bet this year

they actually probably did do something because now my nephew is in like right like school he's not going to like jewish day school so like he's at like a just a regular everybody school so he might have actually done something for it because like to be fair i prior to this i don't even know if he knew who the easter bunny was so but i think we definitely we should another time because also I asked Matz, I was like, oh, what was your Easter like? And he would talk about church. And I was like, oh. I went to church.

Unfamiliar. On Easter, this past Easter. I saw so many wonderful church outfit of the day. Stuff from- I wore a pink suit. And that's exactly the kind of things I was seeing. And I was like, this is really cute. And I was like, I bet you had a great outfit.

Yeah. Yeah. I had a good time. I went to church with Avia and then we had, she had cooked dinner, a wonderful dinner. Oh, nice. What's Easter dinner? That was my Easter. Is it like the same thing?

Yeah. Yeah, basically. We had ham and sweet potatoes and mac and cheese. I picked up a strawberry shortcake from Whole Foods. That's my favorite cake. Whole Foods has the best bakery, to be honest. Like, if you just want something that's not custom and you just want to go pick something up, it's great food. Well, that's why when someone stole Matz's car and they left, like, 15 boxes of empty Chantilly cakes from Whole Foods, I said, they've got taste. I understand. in i get it i get it you needed you were having your joy right and you need a little sweet something snack like and also like some of them weren't even finished and i was like oh

these poor people how many of them why didn't they just get a whole cake i don't know i don't know maybe there's more than one person oh there was multiple people they also left their homework in there and i said that's gonna suck how are you gonna explain that to your teacher I left my homework. So unfortunately, I was in a stolen car. In the car, I stole. Yikes, yikes, yikes. What subjects was it?

History, I think. It was like high school, high school. High school, okay. Yeah, so. Cool. This episode is brought to you by Accenture. When your advertising operations fall out of sync, everything else follows. Spotify and Accenture are working together to reinvent the rhythm of ad sales.

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Oikos Pro. Feed your strength. Visit oikos.ca for more details. Your playlist might get you through the workday. But have you ever wondered how your ancestors spent theirs? What work helped them build a life? How did they adapt as the world around them changed? With Ancestry, you can search select historical occupational records for free for a limited time and discover the stories behind the jobs in your family tree.

You've got questions. We've got ancestors. Search free until August 31st. Visit ancestry.ca for details. Terms apply. But besides Easter, I my biggest thing that the other two things that I've spent most of my brainpower on are Jeopardy and space. I'm just I am watching anything and everything about everybody in space. I'm crying every day about that. And currently we have Jeopardy on. Have I told you about Jamie? so the person mark is all it's the person oh no that's somebody from arkansas with the accent no no that was the one from texas but that was the uh season that we were just using to supplement

when we run out of episodes of jamie because jamie's on currently okay and i'm addicted to jamie jamie just hit half a million motherfucking dollars for his jeopardy winnings 17 games i think he's at from the time of recording i'm obsessed with him he likes to wear orange every single week when he waves like so before he wasn't doing anything when they were like do the introduction and we've got jamie blah blah blah and he wasn't doing anything before and the way he talks about his sister i'm like oh his sister definitely was like you have to like do something like don't just stand there and so he waves and he waves in a way that involuntarily i have to wave back at my tv because it is like he's like and i'm like hello jamie and he for the first like six or seven

episodes they didn't explain in his intro he was a uh what was it a a something bureaucrat which is what they gave him as his title and i was like what and i was like a pure like huh and then it finally they asked him about it and he wanted to be it was like some other form of word like combination of words he wanted to use but basically he works on uh like low-income housing and like doing all of this kind of stuff like he works in like public service but he like jokes that he technically is like a bureaucrat but like one of the good ones but it was so funny because the whole time i'm like you're why are we just say every this is a school teacher we have like a bartender and then we don't have any bartender at this time but we have like some

corporate school teacher and then we have jamie the bureaucrat like what so he's just like brings me so much joy and i'm obsessed with him and that's been like all i've been caring about is watching jamie win every single week and my favorite thing that happens is when someone has like a legendary jeopardy run the other people who are on are like just so fucking stoked to witness it in like real life because they're watching it on tv too and so they're like looking at him being like like they'll get to the finals and he's got 25 000 the other person has negative of a thousand and the other person has four grand and they know that like there's no way they can win and he like gets another answer and they're both just like beaming and like clapping me like

wow and i was like that's just like does he get another answer or does he get another question both and now motz is convinced that it's his time so he's working on his application again great you and i need to get on pop culture one even though it's hosted by carl and jost i think he'd be fine with me making fun of him to his face i think so too i think he can deal with uh what's his nose he can deal with us easily so but yeah i'm sure his wife makes fun of him too as she should she scrolls your hands and he's colin joe's like that is objectively funny and he makes jokes of how because i think she is the second grossest highest female actress behind your old friend and uh you're thinking on it yeah who produced your movie yeah yeah

i just forget because like she's not in so many things all the time she's in avatar and then she's in the six highest grossing movies ever like she's just in all of those the guardians of the galaxy just like sends you to the top right yeah you're right well it was this new avatar that came out oh yeah so um when that happened they were talking about it on snl and then when it got to how much scarlet made they said and they made it negative because of colin because his movies don't do well so they're like that's funny the only thing is or not celebrity um pop culture jeopardy i just it just takes me a second to recall things so i feel like i'm just gonna be slow even though I know the answer

well I think what we would excel in is that I will know the answer but I will not remember I'll like know I won't remember the name but I'll be able to like spit like five things at you to then have jog your memory to be like oh it's this this is how this is this is

it and then I do think it's a three and I need to know if there's sports because if there's like random fucking sports then I guess like Mott's has to come but otherwise like I don't know who rounds us out I think it's just Mott's yeah i think he he also knows like boy things well yeah and like we just learned um because of a joke in abbott that we ended up going down a 45 minute rabbit hole that i was shocked and

mods was shocked that i didn't know any of this i learned about who the insane clown posse posse is yes i was like what the fuck is that yes so when they what did they okay i know who it was but when they said it i thought i misheard what they said well because they said that he's a juggalo and i said yes he said juggalo and i thought they said jiggalo and so i had misheard it but i do know what a juggalo is but i thought they said jiggalo so the whole episode i'm thinking that they're like this man used to be a sex worker and they're all just very casual okay like not like that that makes sense and i was like does it yeah that was exactly my experience but then monster hoogly said no juggalo and i said is that an offensive term for a jiggalo like i have no idea what that is

and he had to explain to me and saying clown posse thinking that it would jog my memory and i was like i've never seen these people ever before in my life and the funny thing is about the juggalos is that it seems like it gives white supremacists and it's not the two members huh it is in fact one of them one of their face paint specifically gives a little bit of whatever that flag with that bird yes and so but they're not and some of but some of their of course some of their fans are yeah and they talk shit on their fans so um you know it when you think about who the juggalos are it does make sense that jacob would be one yes but i thought the whole time they were saying well the first time they said they said gigolo yep and that's just what stuck in my head well

motz was saying the same thing he was like i don't he's like i'm pretty sure it's like you know i don't know that they're all all right but we're looking at it and then it's like a daily a daily show interview thing or whatever and he was like oh no i take it back they're not and i was like well you know not to flex on you my generic clown knowledge but being right wing or any sort of thing like that does in fact go against the ethos of clowning and he was like what do you mean and i was like well a very there was a clown summer camp growing up and like it was by which someone who i literally didn't eat speaking of jeopardy didn't know he was like outside of my hometown famous like when they were like it was like an answer of being like oh wavy gravy and i was like

wait how the fuck do they know who wavy gravy is wavy gravy runs he runs the clown camp like he's from maria like i was shocked and i was telling lots i was like no there's like there's like an clown ethos and there's like a creed of the clowning and like all of that kind of stuff that i was like i i think that they probably wouldn't have been able to get this successful if they were like going completely anti-clown but clowns were another form of blackface oh oh oh for sure i in the in the like the what is like you know actors go to clown school yes yes it's in like the art community that aspect when that shifted to like a performance art in like what is it the 70s yeah somewhere around or something like that which is like what whenever that aspect

like the beatniks and all those people and when it became like a count was it counterculture yeah that that whole movement of it so but when i saw their face paint i was like ah hmm and they're also just like two like bald white guys so yes i'm just gonna say when you have a shaved head or it's naturally squeaky clean and you cover your face in face paint or just not even covering it in paint you already are giving an image yeah and like you're wearing like just the out like the whole thing i was just like oh yeah hmm but they were their whole thing they're like well you know we're not political and i was like okay but their songs reading some of the lyrics you know i wouldn't be shocked if they were cited in a few manifestos yeah so um

all that to say i'm not a juggalo clearly no no but i think i would have really liked the clown camp speaking of camps i was going to suggest because i thought there might be one closer but you can go to space camp as an adult wow how long is the space camp i think or a day camp i think it's a week and it's like eight hundred dollars honestly i'm putting that on my vision board like it's not going to be a this year thing i was trying to figure out how we could just make it part of the podcast yeah and then we take a trip and go yeah make a video yeah i think that's a good idea i would love to i also just recently discovered which you probably already have as well because you've you're on the twitter and the reels and you get some stuff i'm not on reels i don't

know why you keep saying i'm on reels i literally am not on reels the only time i see it i don't get on like actual reels if i'm just scrolling instagram and then you know they force you to no that's the only thing on my fucking feed is reels yeah that's it but um that people which i didn't know we were doing this i didn't i didn't know this was happening that people think that the current space exploration is not real i haven't heard any of that and like i have so many follow up questions because i'm like so you think what what part is fake like do you mean you realize there were hundreds if not thousands of people who like watched it happen in person like regular people who like went to see this take off like there are family members of people who are in

space like i'm so confused and i saw this great video someone was like i just need you guys to conspiracy theory a little bit better because a conspiracy theory like it has the word theory in you can't just say like no i don't believe that you have to have another idea of what you think it is it can't just be like no no and i'm like i'm shocked i've actually never seen so many like i didn't know the flat earthers like i thought i don't know i thought their numbers were dwindling but like i guess they're like more alive and well than ever which is shocking is it to me it feels right well now they the flat earthers have all the internet in the world to share their theories and then find their people they have a corrupt president like well that's what because there

we're going to space under trump's presidency and so then i'm like yeah and that man is fake you don't think he faked a shooting oh did i say that i don't know hey don't worry i've said it so many times on this podcast he was never shot but his ear looks fine now wear some art it was fine the day it happened the day after it happened i know this saggy little band-aid okay okay but yeah um but i'm loving them in space and now that i know that we can go to space camp yeah i think that's where we need to be me too yeah that's i did find that on twitter it was a grown woman was like did you know him and i was like i did not thank you and then i was like let me see if we could go if we could find it closer or something if we wouldn't even went to houston

because i would prefer right and i would prefer to go to houston moth can go golf and he'll drop us off and pick us up okay and then we'll be fine how is flying with the uh shutdown it was perfectly fine um yeah it's it it's not there's not a ton of flights there yeah i mean yeah this is but even the airport was fine like there wasn't a lot of people there oh good i got through and i didn't i had forgot to renew my clear but i got through tsa within 20 minutes like it really wasn't wow yeah they were really moving people along i guess i also got an upgrade to first class it was good i got us i got some food oh they call me miss by miss months so you know the flight actually here it was very smooth no turbulence you deserved that you've had rough

ones recently yeah like they were like i've gotten i've just gotten to the point where i'm just like it's going to shake the whole time yeah and this one was smooth the whole way i got on the plane i actually like i haven't been able to do work or anything on planes because it's too bumpy to read anything and i was going because i'm looking for writer's assistance for the writing room that i'm And I read through resumes and samples, got through all of those, and then had my meal and then took a nap. And then we were here. I will say, though, they have been saying that in general we should all be expecting more turbulence. Yeah, because of global warming and they can't predict it anymore.

Because usually they could just move to a different atmosphere, a layer or whatever. And now even when they move, it's still bumpy. And they're like, OK, we're going to go back down. that's the thing is they're usually just going up and down the whole time yeah they're trying to find the smoothest flight path possible but this one was completely smooth i was shocked i've had that a couple times where then i go i forget like i'm on a plane and i was like oh whoa okay yeah you're right i i am on an airplane yeah we had you know like in the first class i have like they're not actually glass but the plastic and glass and i was like scared that

it was gonna move around and break or something it was fine nice well i'm happy for you you deserve that after yeah after those there was a bitch in front of me though like a fun one no she gets on the plane with her son who's 11 i love you know this because i'm just already getting a vibe from her the fact that you know the age so she gets on and you know people when they get on the plane they just put their bags like if you have a carry-on put it in the one that the first one that you see open yeah and so she just gets on doesn't say hire anything to the flight attendant she just gets on and sees that the one directly over her seat is full and goes they're gonna need to move these and the flight attendant was like what and she goes my son has a medical bag he has

tight to diabetes and they're gonna need to move these bags and the lady was like okay and she says i have to get up and down during the flight in case he his something's wrong with his sugar and the woman's like okay we will get everything moved just you know have a seat like it's not a big deal that this is a small plane as it is yes the first class is like 10 seats yeah so like it's not and there's no one else on the plane yet she's like okay like it's truly not a big deal also and then you're if your kid's diabetes is not stable you really should without a doubt have that under the seat i would have such a hard time not talking back to these people so then she we're in the flight doesn't have headphones for her son who's playing games the whole time so his little games

are going that is my so loud number one like i will death glare and to inevitably say something Yeah. I think it's the rudest thing you can do in the entire world. I do, too. But I have my own headphones on, so I could, I actually could, I was playing music, so I actually couldn't hear it unless I turned my headphones off. And she just has her, she immediately goes to sleep while she's on the flight. And I thought that, like, her son was also rude, but I realized he just talked shit to

his mom because she talked shit to him. She asked, I mean, he asked the flight attendant, like, hi, how are you doing? what's your name in flight and i know the age because yeah he's the flight attendant asked how old he was and he said 11 and so like they were having this banter and then it's like demon mom over here she falls asleep during the flight sleep the whole time has her phone running a tv show also doesn't have headphones on i thought we were concerned about our son's diabetes why are we right and so at one point he asked her like woke her up and said can i get my charger And she goes, yeah. So he gets up, gets his charger out of his bag, but he can't really reach the bag. It flies and hits the lady that's in the seat across from them. She also has her laptop open. And he's like, so apologetic for her. His mom gets up and is like, you should have asked for help. And it was like, he literally asked you if he could get his charger. You knew what he was doing.

you know his height better than anybody right you can't reach that you would know that you probably measure it in a doorway like what oh she's just in a she's just like a nasty lady yeah mean yeah but other than that nice the flight was nice but wow i i have not been on a plane in a while uh when you were in costa rica oh columbia you're right oh columbia sorry wow wow I'm honestly so glad that you said that because that means that I have relinquished a little bit of the anger and resentment I have towards that flight, which did in fact plague me to the point where I told every single person I met for like the next two weeks after that. And when we were in Columbia, I had to tell them about how bad our flight was because it was taking us so much brain

space. So now that I forgot about that, less brain space. Okay. I'm sorry I brought it up. No, no, it's okay. Just so everyone knows, our flight from L.A. to Panama did not have air conditioning. Our red-eye flight did not have air conditioning. There was condensation on the windows from the heat. From the motherfucking heat. From everybody's hot breath. It was disgusting. And I was like, that should be illegal.

Like, it really should be illegal. But, you know, it is what it is. Your playlist might get you through the workday, but have you ever wondered how your ancestors spent theirs? What work helped them build a life? How did they adapt as the world around them changed? With Ancestry, you can search select historical occupational records for free for a limited time and discover the stories behind the jobs in your family tree.

You've got questions. We've got ancestors. Search free until August 31st. Visit Ancestry.ca for details. Terms apply. All right, should we get into advice? Yes. First up. It's just one. And it's huge. Hi, Eminem. Please accept my write-in.

You know I am pro-voice fail. My current emotions and sinus issues are having me to resort to write-in. I just got off of a difficult phone call with someone I would consider my best friend. we've been friends for about five years and almost four years ago she moved across the country we remained close but due to distance have sort of fluctuated in closeness she's getting married next year and i flew out last weekend to go wedding dress shopping with her it was a last minute thing she called and said i know it's crazy would you want to come with me wedding dress shopping and boom flights booked the past few months have been so hectic for both of us so i just jumped on the chance to be there i thought the weekend was fun i just got off the phone with

her and lead a tough conversation she felt like i had rushed on being there and was not considerate of how it affected her. Then this compounded into her feeling weird about a couple of instances that weekend. Examples below. It was a hard conversation that ultimately ended up in me apologizing profusely and her admitting that she'd been feeling weird the past few times we've seen each other and that she just needs some time to think about our friendship. I understand that sometimes friendship requires hard conversations, but my heart just feels very broken right now. This isn't the first time this has happened to me, and although I do not think it will result in a broken friendship, I feel like I'm always someone who cannot keep friends. I always think

too much or not enough or said the wrong thing or didn't do the right thing. All I want is friendship and that feeling of having someone there, but I keep fucking it up. How do I get through this? How do I be a better friend? Is this just being 25? So the examples. After shopping, she was exhausted, but she felt the need to entertain me since I had come all the way there. What interested shopping was me and five of her friends she had met since moving out there, so I felt a little fish out of water sometimes, but they were all super great. She told me that it felt like I was trying to prove that I had to be there. There was a dress that was stunning on her, and when we were all sharing our opinions on it, I had said that it was beautiful, but it just

looked like a white version of a dress she would normally wear. This was then backed with a few friends giving examples of when she'd worn that exact dress before. She told me that me saying that had her in her head a lot about the dress when she really loved it. Please be honest with your answers. I explained my side to her in all of this, that I did love the dress, and I was excited to see her, so when she asked, I said of course, and I flew out, and I tried to offer multiple times that we could stay in but i also didn't want her to feel like i had just come all the way there to sit on her couch but i always walk away from these conversations feeling like i didn't give the right answers thank you love you both sorry for the extra long just wanted to

give context that's context that we needed i'm sorry but what the fuck is up with your friend yeah this is not a you problem this is a her problem you got on a plane like the like immediately when she said she was going wedding shopping i don't know how far you flew but you got on a plane to see her well why in the hell would it be like well you just had to prove that you were that you should be there you asked me to be there like what i don't know what that means at all i i'm gonna go out on a limb and say like is this friend very social and outgoing because i do wonder if maybe you were the fish out of water you were the like you you were you know the you were the sixth person there and all the rest of them all know each other and did you i don't want

to say like did you feel like overly comfortable or like were you not shy like were you being friendly and like introducing yourself to them and all of that i do think for some fucking reason there are some people who are not as outgoing that resent when people are are adaptable in different groups in different situations and that they want you to be there but they want you to show up in a way that they would show up which is you know a little more shy a little more nervous a little more timid or not automatically feeling or even just pretending to feel comfortable which I don't understand that at all like I've without a doubt been on the other like I can get along with a lot of people like I can have a conversation with anyone like I I'm I'm good in those situations

and then finding out that there are people were like oh it just felt like it was like a little too much about you and I was like no I was just there like I was just there and like I think like if my personality feels to you like I'm I'm getting along with your other friends too well like I don't know why you would want me there then don't like at the end of the day if they didn't want you there they shouldn't have invited you no and like like did they feel like they had to do it out of obligation and then when you actually said that you were coming were they upset by that and now they're making excuses all they had to just say was that i'm going wedding dress shopping like if they still want to be friends with you but they didn't want you around

your other friends because i mean some friends don't mesh well together like you have different groups of friends and that's fine and did they just not expect you to actually come and they were just not they genuinely just didn't want you to be there and if so then that should they should have just said that like they shouldn't have invited you no like i think it sounds like she had this already planned and she didn't think you were coming well and also specifically her being like felt like she had to entertain you like you invited me here like if this was an empty invite like you don't have to do that and so i think that like i don't know i'm i'm a real i'm like i say what i feel i i'm not gonna ask for something and i'm like shit i don't want this

person to take me up on it and that kind of thing and so i find it incredibly foreign when other people do that where it's like don't invite me to something if you don't want me there and like don't invite me to something if you don't recognize that me as a person i'm gonna do everything i'm gonna i'm gonna get there like i'm gonna do everything in my power to be there or at the same time don't tell me i don't have to come to something if you want me there like you there is just you have to be direct with this but then even the thing about the wedding dress where it's like that is not a mean thing to say at all and like it sounds like she's just like deeply stressed and insecure about this and like we've talked to us before there's a for some people terminal

infection that happens when they get engaged and they become a bride and like everybody tells them that everything is about them this is their time this is their time that they don't think anyone else exists outside of the peanut gallery and the spectacle of being an audience member to this performance and period of their life right like you don't exist besides that so like if you don't play the role that she has in her head of her wedding experience if you are a normal human being who has thoughts and decisions and choices in a life outside of this that is like deeply threatening to the reality that she has created right and if you don't want people's opinions don't ask their opinions don't have six people there that is crazy if you're not looking for

that they they agree with you if you want people obviously she likes the dress if you i feel like when i go wedding dress shopping for myself i probably will not have a lot of people if anybody there because i truly will not care about anybody's opinion when i see what i want i'm going to want it might be like come look at like the sizing of it or if like the shape of it but as far as like what I actually want no no and like if you are not a decide like I don't know I I'm a like I'm such a decisive person like no one could say something about something that like I like that like changes the way that I feel about it but like when I have there are certain people I'll go shopping with I tried on dresses with you and like you said this exact thing to me of being like this

just looks like like you would wear this dress not at it and that is the most helpful thing I think you can tell somebody because you have to make the difference between do I like this silhouette and shape because it reminds me of something I already have or things that I already wear and do I want my wedding dress to be something that I can wear in another color essentially like all the time or do I want something that's more special and so the idea that if she loved it that much as is and it was like no i actually want something that is like something i would wear every day just in white like i like that doesn't sound like that's what she wanted and so i don't know why you saying that and then the fact that everybody else agreed with you there's just

sometimes being the being the the longer friend there just can it can it can fall on like all the shit can then fall on you because they feel more comfortable in your friendship and they're typically like putting on a little bit more of a performance for their new friends and their new friends are also probably putting on a little bit of performance for them too and they've probably heard about you too and they're also there's that as well yeah like i don't i think it's big of you to have apologized for this this is but like fundamentally this is not a you problem and like i can see how you would tie this to like other friendships in your life having ended but i would like do everything that you can to acknowledge that like there's something specific about so

many people losing friendships when their friend is getting married and i'm sure it happens on the i mean it obviously because there's two people a part of it but like that is something that is not about you i know i was yeah i'm talking to other people someone else about it where we were talking about shared experiences about friendships that like completely decimated because that person was getting married and they like became a complete like a just a totally different person and they were like oh yeah that's happened to me like three times and it's like that shit is just it's fucking crazy and i think there's also a narrative that they tell brides of being like you'll really find out who your true friends are and i'm like okay i hear you but like i've also experienced

a lot of brides being horror like just turning into really horrible people that i'm like this industry is trying to tell you that you have to be selfish and this is the only time in your life and this is the most important thing until you push out a baby so like it is just like it's a very weird industry and a very weird like social time in people's lives and i think people want to be treated i think most people want to want to be treated in a way that like you don't naturally treat your like best friend you know yeah i i i'm of the mindset now of like i'm not trying to have a lot of friends i just want to cultivate the small the people that i actually want to be around all the time there's associates that you know like you know let's get dinner once a quarter

or once a year but like my actual friends like that that that's what's important to me yeah that's like those are the relationships that i want to be like the easiest of them like i don't want to have to i show up in a way that like is not authentic to myself or like worry about the song and dance of it and like to me this just sounds like she's not able to acknowledge that like she shouldn't have invited you and she didn't want to invite you and like this to me all of this feels incredibly passive aggressive like so performative too yeah it was performative asking you to come it was performative of her to go try on these dresses and ask people's opinions and now she didn't get the results that she wanted and she's blaming you for it yeah so i would i

would personally like know that this has nothing to do with you were a great friend in this circumstance like you did everything right this is not you but i would encourage you to to to not let her change the narrative and the expectation of your friendship because i think it'd be wonderful if you can maintain a friendship with this but like i do think i do think that sometimes we give people a lot of a we give people a lot of grace for treating us poorly because of a time in their life that they don't reciprocate like that that that isn't necessarily reciprocated or ever going to be like it can fundamentally change that relationship so i think like not biting your tongue about how you feel is important because if she's going to be able to tell you this is how she feels

about all of this then if it was me i'd be like okay balls in your court friendship wise because like you you should like if if she tells her therapist or her other another friend or a sibling or whatever a family member about this story you are not the villain in this you're not the villain so don't assume that role of like grovel i need to bend over backwards and do all of that because it creates an expectation in that relationship that is like so mismatched and unequal that that will not survive it just kind of temporarily puts a life vest with a hole in it for the relate for the friendship that will eventually end if if she doesn't also acknowledge that this was on her oh but i'm pissed for you and spending money on the flight oh and you fly so much as it

is like that was probably one of your few weekends that you had free yeah that pisses me off yeah This, I am pissed for you. brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most. Learn more at Accenture.com slash Spotify. Hear that? It's your money calling. It wants a promotion. Elevate your savings with the Scotia High Interest Savings Account. Always earn high regular interest rates that grow the more you save and invest. Conditions apply. Visit scotiabank.com slash H-I-S-A to learn more. Scotiabank. You're richer than you think. Can we talk about the Bridgerton casting?

Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God. Thank you. Just, like, I'm looking up to the heavens. Thank you. Thank you to his mother. Thank you. Thank you to the casting director. Thank you to Shonda. thank you to whatever has made this man look the way he does also he's playing lord anderson's son who we already think lord anderson is very very hot but lord anderson the actor himself is a lot

younger than his character is supposed to be oh no way so these two actors are only 10 years apart and they are on i'm in the middle of them and i'm just like i can have either one thank you as ava said on abbott when she met gregory and his father or met gregory's father double trouble exactly but i have to say so melissa i i sent a link to melissa at almost the exact time like within the same 60 seconds well i had actually sent it before i got on the plane like as the plane was taken off so it didn't go through until after i had opened the app so yes it's so it comes through the same time that i send melissa the link on a text and so melissa sends me the instagram and it's we're both just sending the casting announcement of this man i have no words but

your risk your the words you added to this killed me she says a new bombshell has entered the villa parentheses did i say that right and i was like yes you said it perfectly that's exactly what that is and i laughed so hard because my god this man is like stupid hot like stupid motherfucking hot yeah and they said he's gonna be the talk of the ton and i'm like they have they need a new slut now that benedict has been married and i'm like oh we're gonna be seeing we'll be seeing somebody oh he's just i'm just i'm thrilled i just i am so looking forward to this season of bridgerton and i i just i like cannot wait i can't wait like it's gonna be i think this is gonna be the greatest one yet i think so too i think and did you not see that it seems like they're teasing

violet season yeah yeah i mean shawn just said that would be if they did it then but it's probably gonna come yeah after this which i will i would love like i would love so much because then we're gonna get we're gonna get i hope they bring back young charlotte and young lady danbury too young lady danbury i that her performance i want like i know that it's acting but the fact that she had to fuck that old man that i literally am like and now you're in love with violet he died on he died inside of her melissa he died fucking inside of her and she had to push him off he had dig his teeth out to have sex it was literally traumatizing so disgusting it was horrible and then we find out who who her one true love is unfortunately betrothed to another like that

fucking sucks betrothed but like whatever i just hope we get we see her with somebody else i want her to win i need her to win so fucking young young her and then also older her since she's going on this trip which i think maybe she's gonna bring her nephew back with her um but i hope that she meets someone on the way too so i need her to have like a fun sexy scene where it's not an old man with no teeth yeah dying inside and also another old man at least he was charming but yeah and someone maybe viola's dad was also old yeah and not married ideally yeah that would be my ideal for her because i'm a racist too yeah like let her win let her have something something this i mean she did get her wind of charlotte letting her go but no but i want i want her to

win when it's that actress i want her to win in her youth yeah like yeah it's just a lot she's been through a lot she's by the way if anyone tried to tell me fucking shit if charlotte was like you can't leave i go my old husband with no teeth died inside of me and i'd be like right i'm so sorry like i would use that that would end someone's like ma'am you can't do that i can do whatever the fuck i want yes yeah that's true um but also the lady that's gonna be michaela's like best friend i think that's gonna get francesca jealous because i saw they didn't use a great picture of her but i saw a video of her walking and that woman is blah blah boom as well and then the other lady's her mom so okay i'm just so excited i think it's gonna be phenomenal

they have fucking insane chemistry like already and i'm like this is gonna and like people who are like i mean we're not even gonna get into them let's put lesbophobia of all of it but like the people who talk about like i just miss yearning do you want to talk about yearning talk about lesbians in this time this is gonna be the most yearning season fucking ever they've already spent the last season yearning for each other like it's gonna be so so so good and i can't fucking wait can't fucking wait um do you know who you don't and i'm really excited to tell you this i have like some fantastic like influencer news which i think is the funniest thing that has happened since um nick vile's wife copy and pasted claudia's birthday caption on

instagram for phineas for nick vile um this is a girl named alana taber i had no idea who she was not familiar with her whatsoever but i guess she was on the new york city influencer subreddit or someone was on the new york city herself there was someone on the no there was someone on the new york city influencer subreddit who like was decently active in the group like talking about people shitting on them like you know gossiping like how all the accounts are all anonymous accounts all doing that and uh then you know people were talking about this girl and being like who is she like you know she seems kind of like basic but like whatever and i think she's dating oh god what's his name jamie campbell bauer i think it is he's the one in stranger

things right yes who is he he's in he's an actor but who is he in stranger things vecna so that's not helpful i watched the first season no he's like a monster you can't even see his face okay um but he looks like a he looks like a lost scars guard okay he's got like that kind of like intense sort of look some of the scars bars look very goofy he looks very serious is he a goofy one or a serious one he's kind of like a mix he has longer hair so he's looking a little more goofy but prior to that he he very much embodied the um like victorian ghost child okay vibe okay so like the one that was in it that's the one who i think he has the most similarity to but he's also in harry potter he's in twilight you would know this man what's his

name again jamie campbell bauer i can't say that i know him but he has the look that you explained yes so he's like a successful actor he's been working forever um and so there's a post on the New York City subreddit uh the influencer subreddit about being like oh yeah like this girl she's friends with so and so this influencer blah blah and like I'm pretty sure she's like dating Jamie Campbell Bauer like kind of crazy like what the heck and then I think it's like a couple posts or something like that and then does one being like oh my god like she is definitely dating him and posts like a link being like to anyone see her tiktok post the link you click the link in this up reddit it takes you to the tiktok the tiktok says shared by alana taber

and this is the count that has already been posting not only about her but her other fucking influencer friends i mean this is how back in the day people would any they they would just spread gossip about themselves or call the paparazzi on themselves so it's not like this is knew it's not like she invented anything but she got caught just in the same way that people are getting caught liking their own posts from or making comments on their own posts from their actual account instead of their yep so genuine and real which is what maddie from the bachelor commented on her own post but like i all of the comments in response to this people going i i would have to end it all like there's actually no like i would move like there is nothing

this is a level of embarrassment that and like so now her influencer friends are like talking about it on their podcast and being like what the fuck like so she's the thing is they're also doing it for sure but like they're also not they're not being smart and like because my whole thing i'm like talk about me behind my back like a normal like person like that's i'm always i'm a big a big believer and like it's totally fine to shit talk people but everyone's like why were you being so nice to my face like we don't have to be friends you're the one who wanted to pursue being a like friend like this is really fucking weird and also like jamie campbell is gonna break up with you like this was like really crazy like really really really crazy are they actually

dating or was she just trying to start a rumor no they're actually dating okay yeah and i was like girl you didn't have to do that like you really didn't have to just posted a picture you You could have had one of your friends post a picture, like, look like a paparazzi and post a picture from far away and say, oh, my gosh, did you guys see this of them together somewhere? Do better. We have 13 mutuals on Instagram. You're doing fine. Like, you didn't need to do all of this. Like, let people discover you.

You've got hundreds of thousands of followers. It wasn't happening fast enough for her. No. And I just. I hope she had it. So her Reddit was at least close so people can see the other things she was posting. But I know she wasn't that smart. They can.

That's why they saw, like, you're talking shit about all these other people. And now all of these are tied back to you. That's awful. They've archived it. So I want to read the original one. She posts a picture of her and Jamie Campbell Bauer. This relationship isn't news, but I need someone to talk to about this. LOL.

I haven't kept up with her as much, but she used to be one of my favorites back in the day. And I keep seeing her bump up with Jamie Campbell Bauer. and it's like so crazy uh and it's so crazy to me i loved her vibe a lot alongside my moya and all those girls who seem cool and kind she used to be one of the few influencers who at least attempted a level of more research class interesting content like the history lessons or the financial education or just traveling to more unique parts of the world and showing the culture by connecting with locals even if it's a bit pseudo-intellectual sometimes like she wants people to be like no she's like a real intellectual pseudo-intellectual sometimes i really appreciated

that there was more substance than so many other New York City consumers and final boss influencers I follow. I kind of stopped keeping up with her as much when she left New York City

for Paris, but she doesn't seem to post as much and maybe gone more private because of her relationship. It's insane seeing how much unhinged hate she gets for just existing

and dating someone famous. I saw this TikTok recently and I was like, damn, this would suck. And that was the TikTok that she went to. I wonder if he asked her not to be as active,

like, and then she didn't like that. And so then she had to create all this extra content commotion around herself because now she is in paris not doing as much since she's not since she has said in this that she's not posting as much and so this was how she could still post without actually posting well part of me wonders if like it was the exact opposite and like no one really cared that she was dating him and she wasn't getting this like you know

zane from one direction girlfriend hate of being like he's mine all of that stuff that she was like um let me pretend that like i'm getting like so much hate for dating jamie i was like i've never once wondered who jamie campbell power was dating like if that was part of it too that it was just like no no i need p i need people to feel bad for me because i'm like it's again it's not like you're dating someone from one direction it's not like you're dating justin bieber it's not like you're dating uh i don't know someone who's like it's like such an insane parasocial fandom that wants you and so and so to be together like if it's a stranger things fans like he wears a green suit the whole time like you can't see his face this man is also 37 years old like he's a grown

man i know childish things yep yep yep okay well oh my god she posted another one how private can i really be on reddit if i want to be anonymous is it really possible on reddit i'm assuming the best tip is just not to share anything personal you could also you can cut it off so people can't see your oh i do you know how many people i found or if they make a stupid comment i'll go look and see what other comments they made yeah but like i like to go see to make sure this wasn't a one-off and usually i'm right they just are they just make stupid comments so then i know but like just turn it off so people can't see that way they can't keep tracking you they can track the things that you're saying and also like don't we all know by this point when you share a tiktok it says it

comes from you like yikes go from your browser or something i just or just share a screenshot of it like just don't don't don't do it but uh yeah i just i just think if it's not going well for you that you're dating a famous guy and it's not working like then date someone more famous that means that you don't really like them that much no and like that's okay if you're using him then like if it's not working then then go date someone more famous like I promise you you will get whatever you're a beautiful young girl like you will get whatever you want like I always we always say this I'm like dating someone famous is not like an unattainable or a hard thing you just have to want it and like it's not gonna be necessarily what you think it's going to be or

all that but like if you have like an objective and this is what you want out of it like it's the same thing like finding a rich husband you can do that like you can do that you can't make someone that you like into that archetype you have to go find that archetype and it turns out you might you might not like them that much or it might not be everything you thought it was going to be but like just find someone more famous you're beautiful all right well thanks for joining us joining us on thursday we'll be on uh but am i watching we'll be reviewing kiki palmer's show on Peacock the Burbs. Yay!

All right. We'll see if you don't want to watch that or listen to that. We'll see you next Monday for another episode of Don't Play Me. Bye. Bye. This is a Sister Sign production

hosted by me, Megan Rinks. And me, Melissa D. Montz, plus Diamond Imprint Productions. Post-production by Coco Lorenz. Production assistance by Melanie D. Watson. and music by Ryan Hunter and Giacomo Picasso.