Don't Blame Me! - Going Off On An Ex

Episode Date: April 27, 2023

But Am I Wrong: Melisa: Stop ignoring the greatest health drink ever invented Meghan: Cancel interactive audience experiences But Are You Wrong: Hating your hateful relatives Confronting your ex Ending a friendship Sharing food storage But Are The Wrong: Arnold Schwarzenegger  Oklahoma Sheriff's Department Write In: [e-mail] Weigh In: vote in the weekly poll on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/by.meghan.and.melisa/ Buy Our Merch: https://store.dftba.com/collections/don-t-blame-me Join Our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/dontblameme Listen to Don't Blame Me: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dont-blame-me/id1223800566 Follow Us: https://www.instagram.com/by.meghan.and.melisa/ https://vm.tiktok.com/TTPdYV7J5p/ Follow Meghan: https://www.instagram.com/meghanrienks/ https://twitter.com/meghanrienks https://www.youtube.com/c/meghanrienks Follow Melisa: https://www.instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa/ https://www.instagram.com/diamondmprintproductions https://twitter.com/SheIsNotMelissa Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

i didn't even get to hear all of it that was wonderful discography wonder that was just for you thank you i have no desire to go to a rascal in his flats concert i just feel like not my vibe not my people not anything I would hire them for a private party so we could wow hi hello welcome to another episode of but am I wrong starring two people who have not once ever been wrong what's it like to never be wrong Melissa you know um some days are easier than others and you know I wake up and I'm like what's that pressure that's on my shoulder and it's the weight of the world but most days you know it's pretty good you carry that weight beautifully and unlike the thick-necked steroided up men you have relaxed your traps physically but you've been setting

those traps but i've that's what i was gonna say but i've been setting traps though catching what you need to catch while carrying the the insurmountable weight of you know you say the world i say the universe on those shoulders yeah well i gotta sleep sometimes you know so i take a few days off from the universe today's you obviously you gotta you you have a great public and professional working relationship with the universe and the aliens so you know i love you so much i can't we some of you in this like melissa being the the brains of the podcast and the audio equipment and all the stuff like sometimes you'll just sneak up on me with some audio thing and it's

like oh you just know how to make it sound like it's coming from inside my head yeah a whole new unique way i don't do it for you though i do it for the listeners but at this time you are listening to me yeah right now it's you're performing to an audience of one and then in a couple and then like two weeks or a week people will be like oh that was funny and you're like every day i'm constantly bangers after bangers let's talk about why the show is going to be different next week the show is going to be different next week because if you missed last week's episode or any of last week's entire docket of all of our shows you might not know that melissa and i proposed the idea that we've been toying with for a while you all know if you've listened for a long

time that we've always wanted to do like a tv movie kind of podcast we talk about that stuff like all the time but we wanted like a re-watch sort of thing but um we do not have the time to start a whole new podcast and the the the news in the world is very bleak very sad melissa's swamped with work i've been swamped with work and so on those days we've like skipped a couple episodes of but am i wrong between like being sick and then you know really insane yeah burnt out work stuff and then it's really hard when you're incredibly burnt out from work to then want to talk about like really horrific stuff that's like in the news and things that are really rough especially like week after week after week so we thought when those moments arise when we're

either burnt out or things are just feeling very dark and depressing and we want something that's a little more lighthearted and also assume that our listeners want something like a nice little bit of escape ism we're going to start watching shows singular episodes or maybe movie we're doing show this time because time commitment um and then we're basically taking like the same format of hot takes are but am i wrong and applying them to the show so first up we are watching gilmore girls yes so we're doing a double feature essentially yes amy i always forget the order of her name sure i'm not helping you at the second because i want to hear what you're gonna say say pellegrino it's funny that's what i was gonna say pellegrino but i know it's pala

gino no fuck now that you've said it paladino i was like i'm gonna mess it up amy sherman paladino so i love one of her shows and megan loves another one of her shows and we have competing thoughts on them for different reasons um that we've never even seen the other shows really i've kind of seen gilmore girls which is first up chronologically um anyway because it came out first um so gilmore girls is a show about talking it's about a mom a daughter the grandmother's there melissa mccarthy's there bonnie's there that's all i got there's a there's a cafe yep it's a diner a diner there's yale i think yep yep okay that's yep that's what i got women talking in connecticut that's what gil margaret women talking fast in connecticut

and then it's marvelous marvelous mrs mar marvelous mrs mazel there you go it's she's miss or mrs mrs marvelous mrs mazel and that is um a musical without music it's a tv show that looks like um this the television production of uh fox presents greece live but minus all of the singing and dancing and they wear small hats and have pin curls and i think they i assume they talk in matz's favorite old talkie voice and um it's not in black and white but it gives the vibe that maybe it could have been um and it also has a lot of the same characters in it are the same actors from Gilmore Girls because Amy Sherman Palladino loves to recast and also as a fun fact Amy Sherman Palladino loves to wear a top hat which Mott's is obsessed with that fun fact about her yeah so

we're going to embark on this and we are sourcing your own hot takes if you've never watched the show you have watched the show like we're really going based off of the first episodes of each of them um so you can submit your hot takes warm takes cold takes just first like anything that gives the the it can be something you've been stewing on for a very long time that you're like this is a hot take as a diehard fan or you can say hot take i agree with megan this show is a musical without any music and this is the first time i've watched as well so you can submit those to but amirongpod at gmail.com ASAP and

I will say by the time that this episode comes out then we have already recorded Gilmore Girls but send them in for Maisel send them in but we're looking forward to it I'm very excited and just

to reassure everybody I promise you Cheetah Girls more specifically Cheetah Girls 2 is coming we just did not have the time this week and that one was one that like we need to fuck it we need us all to know this is coming

there's three right yeah without a doubt the second one is truly the most important one like culturally but we have to give everybody in the audience enough time to know it's coming because I don't want them to miss out on being able to share what I could talk about that movie for hours

you know they're based on a book yes Megan we talked about this last week and don't blame me that sounds familiar or i do think i was there or see you next tuesday i don't know one of the ones i've already edited reviewed for this week that y'all sometimes i don't know what we talk about online and what we talk about offline see the differences i hear you listen to me i listen back so i hear it twice and still you're not sick of me that's so impressive congratulations good for you don't say that anyways shall we get into this show all right time for but am i wrong and that's

where we mega and melissa pick something from our lives from pop culture a hot take a rant something that we might've done this week that might've been, you know, wrong. And then we presented. Okay. Before we get into mine, I just want to give an update to DinoGate. And if you don't know what I'm talking about, several, several, several episodes ago, I gave my hot take on dinosaurs. Yeah. I gave my hot take on dinosaurs. And I just want to say that now researchers are saying that T-Rex's mouth might not have been as big as that we've seen. And they probably had lips. And right now they're depicted without having lips. So I just want to add that T-Rex's got their little flappy chicken wings, probably got birds

on it, got smaller mouths with lips. So this means because this is like a big part of the logo for jurassic park that we need a new movie a new reboot of it that doesn't have chris pratt in it i co-sign anything that involves removing chris pratt i do have a question can you have teeth without lips like a mouth like what is that ask like all these white dudes that are walking around like that but like i'm just looking at them and i'm like yeah so think about like a like a like a uh lizard they got little teeth in there but they don't have lips i guess i would just consider the perimeter of their mouth yes but they're saying that they have like lips lips you know that's their mouth like the t-rex from toy story those are some lips that's just a bottom

lip really so when you close them up he doesn't really have lips it's just because we're talking like a cupid's bow like maybe we're talking about like is this like a lip flip lip like filled hyaluronic acid here's the thing dinosaurs the depiction of them really fanfics as i've already said so i don't really need to say much more on that subject choose your own adventure if that's what you want it to look like if you want it to look like that they got injections that's your dinosaur i want a dr miami product i want a dinosaur that went to dr miami okay well there you go huh all right so here's my hot take this week is that we've been ignoring one of the best electrolytes ever i know that you're like in your electrolyte era right now i am

and so um one of the greatest health drinks was invented a long time ago and we haven't really been talking about it and first i want to preface it by saying that i'm not a doctor i'm not liable for any of these claims i've consulted our legal team and i do want to make sure that you all know that i'm not a doctor that being said that being said i mean this information is all like if you go on any like healthline.com webmd the information's there so this this drink open your eyes this drink helps soothe muscle cramps helps you stay hydrated because of the sodium and potassium It can help with hangovers because of the electrolytes, which are sodium and potassium.

You can use it as a recovery aid instead of Gatorade and Powerade without the sugar. It's inexpensive. You probably already have it in your refrigerator right now. Wait, don't say it yet. Okay. I'm writing down three guesses, and I'm writing down guesses as they come up. Okay. Cool, cool, cool.

It contains antioxidants. It has a significant amount of vitamin C and E. It helps boost your gut health because it's fermented, so there's probiotics in it. It has Q-seratin, which helps in lowering cholesterol. It also has antibacterial properties, so it can kill the germs that cause bad breath as Listerine says so when you chill it it's cold it can be refreshing it's a little tart can make your lips pucker a little bit you can choose your own adventure really because sometimes it can be vinegary I mean it's always vinegary a little garlicky can be sweet or buttery whatever you desire you may ask what I'm referring to what I would swirl around and guzzle what is the greatest health drink that was ever invented megan putting your guesses

okay i'm gonna read you i'm gonna give you my guesses in order of i think my final one is the one that it is so my first one you who as soon as you said fermented i go you who is not fermented and if it is i'm fucking out and someone needs to call the fda then i thought pedialyte and then i was like i feel like that's pretty obvious you probably already have it in your fridge and I go not unless you have I think it's children who drink that and then I thought as in pediatrician as in child don't come with you the fucking latin prefix and suffix all over again and then I was like kool-aid and I was like you got into the fermented and I go I do not think the kool-aid man is fermenting and then I thought cranberry juice because you brought that up and

then you said garlic and buttery and then my final guess is pickle juice correct correct pickle juice so Megan I know you've been complaining about the citrus in your life so if you want to take a shot of pickle juice Melissa before I got electrolyzed when I was desperate I was like trying to drink the salt water and I had someone dm me and they were like giving me like we talk a good amount and they also uh they have diagnosed pots but they were like you definitely have it and I was like yeah I'm trying the salt water thing and they were like I'm telling you right now babe if you get desperate I need you to just take those pickles out if you want to eat them later put them in a different jar keep one of just the liquid swig and you're gonna feel better in

five minutes and I did and I was like oh wow I literally have just a little a little one just of the juice left in there for when I need it occasions yeah yeah and it's it's you know it's that like savory kind of vibe especially if like oh my heart's a racing and I I just ate something like salty and savory I'm like I want to keep continue on this path and sometimes you get those little pickle chunks what are those little chunks in there is that garlic yeah it can be garlic that's the thing that's what i was saying choose your own adventure depends on what they flavored it with it could be garlic it could be just the seeds oh the seeds that makes the spices that they put in there too wow you are you're you're so spot on with all of this and

like who's gonna get on the pickle juice pr team right because the i can see the next thing the next big thing they're like bone broth we're over that we're not gonna sell bone broth for 15 a cup anymore or getting on the pickle juice train air one's gonna start selling pickle juice shots you know who was like spearheading the pr campaign they got a higher as in pickle spears wow unintentional slay on my end go me the uh it was selena gomez selena gomez big pickle girl big pickle girly she would get on all of those late night talk shows especially when she was in her disney era and they would be like let's talk and like you know disney really media trained so you only have about three things you can bring up and so constantly

hosts are being like selena now you love pickles and she's like oh yeah like you know i drink pickle jukes and like bring out the pickle juice so like you could probably find like a two-hour compilation of her on every single late night show drinking pickle juice selena i know you're busy you've got rare beauty you're doing so many other things only murders in the building love the show if you could a cooking show to link back oh yeah selena and chef if you could link back up with the pickle academy i'd love that yeah collab you know we speak things in existence on this podcast so it's probably coming also why we should also be a part of the collab we should just like give it off so pickle juice i know that you like pickles and i know that you have electrolyte

problems so i was trying to find a solution for you thank you you're welcome this should be your new MLM so mine is I if this is a hot take I don't know insert some saying like slap me across the face and call me Susan like if this is a hot take like I know if I'm alone in this feeling and if I find out that there are people there in the world walking around to enjoy this experience and want this experience to happen we have issues and you are the people who are enabling this continue happening. And I blame you for so many things in the world. So this is either a hot take or rant. We don't know yet. I mean, without a doubt, it is a rant because I am passionate about this subject.

But we need to make this. I don't believe in cancel culture, as in I don't believe it exists. But if I could cancel something, I could make this. I am anti-police. I am anti-prison. this straight to jail when cast members of broadway shows walk through the aisles and interact with audience members which is the exact same thing and it gives the exact same emotion to me oh this is in character not not just like walking around afterwards in character fraternizing oh with the audience in their seats and it is only leveled up by the experience of a bug's life quote-unquote ride experience at is it disneyland that's where that one is interactive movie theaters any sort of interacting with the audience i gotta take notes so i can be

in character it is awful it is awful the 3d movies where they blow hot air in your face No, I'm being assaulted in the theater by a two-dimensional picture. Oh, and then they're like, oh, throw some 3D glasses on so you can really feel out of sort. That is awful and terrifying. And I am terrified with the uptick in AI, virtual reality, that they're going to be like, well, you know what? You can watch The Hunger Games and you can feel the fire.

You can feel your heart racing and you can feel the impending doom that you will be killed. And guess what? Maybe the audience, maybe we'll have people walking through the audience and breathing down your neck so you genuinely have that fear. I want to watch a performance, whether that is on stage or on screen, as a form of escapism. I want to watch it and enjoy it and just know that, like, I'm in the cinema. I'm in the theater. I am not participating. I'm not getting paid. Where are my union reps? This is a SAG violation. I am not a part of this production. and the fact that you're going to hoodwink and bamboozle me into into into gasping and and awing for my own sensory displeasure hard pass straight to jail criminal offense and i don't know why but i feel like lin-manuel miranda has something to do with this are you done yes this is a hot take you fucking freak you like this goddamn shit you're insane here's the thing first of all cats the musical part of it is them going in the stage and interacting that is part of the enjoyment nightmare of the show i don't know if you watch kimmy schmidt but there is a bit in

that show that they just pick people at random and then you just become part of the show because what cats feels like oh that combines my two of my least favorite things and the other one is humans with like fur on their like the the like where you're oh no no no no no no no if i could go to a show of greece and they induct me into being a pink lady a dream i uh went to this should be no surprise to you because i go to interactive shows like bridgerton that bridgerton thing i went to was a show you were like the first of all not star diamond diamond diamond oh my gosh no i mean you were like the like number one on the call sheet not in like a you weren't a like an ornamental star like you were like the leading

lady I you know I 3D movies I went to as a kid Honey I Shrunk the Kids which that movie as a whole is terrifying I mean you add the 3D element even more terrifying they did

have the feeling of things breathing on you like bugs breathing on you or like sneezing on you and feel the water hitting you they even had rats moving around on your little feet Wait, what year did this come out? Because I wonder if that also traumatized me.

I was a kid kid, so I don't even think you would have been alive. But they had a second one. But I'm sure it went... But I mean, like, when I went on that ride, yeah, I was like a kid kid, so I don't think you were alive or you were like a baby. But I'm sure it was around for a long time.

Wait, is it a ride or the movie? The movie was... There's two movies, or three maybe. Wait, but are you saying the interactive part was... the no there was like a right like you talked about ants or whatever you were talking about the same way they had that oh wow so they show like bits of the movie but then make you part of the movie and so like when things would happen in the movie they would happen to you i have terrifying that feels i don't know if it's like i'm having a visceral reaction to

my experience with the bugs life and i'm feeling like i lived this too but i feel like i live this it's awful yeah i definitely didn't everything florida no i might have no i definitely i probably definitely did it might have been the same goddamn fucking time because i was in florida and as a child the only time i went to disney was disney world florida ron desantis this is your fault so um yeah hot i i love to be part of interactive theater though so as long as i've signed up for it i don't want to be like on the street and then a man a british man walks outside and does dances and holds up fucking traffic i don't want to be part of that because i didn't consent to it but if i paid money to go to a theater experience i want to be part of it

but what if you don't know that you're a part of it i think if you go to a show you should be prepared okay but i was like a six years old like you how are you gonna prepare a six-year-old like by the way there's a lot of things that are their fault but like so it's very very long list but like i think if i experienced it as an adult no i still would hate it but i just but you wouldn't go to it because you know because i would know i would know now but when you buy a ticket you're essentially consenting to it even i remember because i did a little like summer report on it and they're on the ticket it said that they will be touching you for the honey i shrunk the kids thing so you were consenting to it okay you just didn't maybe maybe the thing is is

this needs to be an adult only show or with children that have to have have children with their lawyers present who know what they're signing yeah children with representation legal representation who know their rights and know what there's yeah because here i i would like let me press some charges for these oh my god i hate it i hate it and you wonder the irony of all of it is i could never go through like a haunted house for that same reason like i don't don't fucking do not interact with me i'm not here i do not consent to haunted houses because i don't like to be scared but if i'm gonna have fun bring me in so my thing with the haunted houses is like there's no way i could ever walk through them at all but um i'm dramatic

i'm a performer so i would be in the haunted houses that are like our hometown like it's very once you watch gilmore girls that's very my hometown but more granola and uh we would have these haunted houses like my friend's dad would put on it like you just like took over his basement he's like a like contractor so like it would be like he's building multiple rooms Claire on Modern Family oh my god like it's like it's the fact that like I would go to her house like every like multiple times during the week super super close every time the haunted house happened I'm like what is this part like I would never even know where we were in terms of like what the house was and then they would eventually and like he would his goal was always just to break even was

never making any money on it and then he would rent out this specific place called Pavilion in um in our town which is kind of like a big barn hall thing and we do it in there and i would always be in the haunted house but i'd be so afraid so like one of the older guys would like give me a piggyback ride where i would close my eyes and it would be before obviously anyone's coming through and they're like okay it's megan everyone everyone's like okay like turn the lights on she's going through and like i would still close my eyes like no one would scare me and then i'd scare the shit out of people and then when we'd be done they'd have to like escort me out the same kind of way so when i'm in control i'm fine if i'm controlling that but it's the

it's the not knowing we were also weren't allowed to touch people though because people kept like and even if we didn't touch people still some people would get punched that's what i was gonna say that's part of the reason why i haven't gone into a haunted house or i want to participate in one because i i feel like i would punch and i feel like other people also punch so no thank you yeah that's fair i'm pretty sure the rule is if they hit you you can hit them back probably not but i think i think it should be at that point if you punch someone a haunted house yeah i think you punch someone in general in general because then self defense oh this has been a very controversial way to start the show but you know hey we both

have our things and mine are you could probably find if you're a psych major you could probably just crack open a page in the dsm-5 and go there she is a lot of my issues are right there right on there drink some pickle juice participate in a play and we're gonna take a break and we're back but are you wrong is when y'all write in and share times in your life that you might have been wrong and then we debate it first up writer number one hello eminem i 25 they them and my family got in some weird situation with my aunt let's name her yolanda my question was going to be is this in reference to selena and then in the parentheses it says yes as in that cunt who murdered selena and my cousin her daughter let's call her hayley yes as in justin's

wife both go by she her so my sister 24 she her came back from a trip to visit them and she unfortunately overheard them trash talking about our family trash talking about my mom my dad sisters and me. A lot of it is actually horrible, like saying transphobic shit about me, slut-shaming my other sisters, making fun of my mom's non-existent sex life when they both know my mom has endometriosis and is in a lot of pain and my dad's previous alcoholism. We were all heartbroken. My sister didn't say anything at the time just because of pure shock. I think it hurt me more because i was close to them i called my aunt called her childish she kept denying and that bitch is a terrible liar and bad actor like she's in a cheesy porno she then confessed and

what surprised me is she said that i should go back to normal that's in quotes because being non-binary is our word. End quote. I also like to mention I have autism. So of course, hate that word. And Yolanda knows I have autism too. I then got angry and said, I hate you. And I hate Haley and hung up. After that, my dad told me that I made Yolanda and Haley cry. And for some reason I felt guilty. I don't know why. Plus I believe hate is a strong word. So am I wrong for saying i hate them p.s my mom who's petty said honestly you should have just called her a bitch um i don't like to use the word hate um as in like towards a person that i know uh i mean there are people that i do strongly dislike but i don't like to use the word hate

Because I think it just carries a lot of connotation to it. But if that's what you were feeling in that moment, when people have said hateful things towards you and your family, transphobic things, being ableist, slut shaming, if that was an emotion you were feeling at the time, then you don't have to hold back if you don't want to. uh I also you know them being angry and crying um like it made you feel guilty again that's an emotion that you went through these are emotions emotions can ebb and change just because like you I mean you do love them so like that the guilt is understandable but also they did something that hurt you so they were crying you were I don't know if you were physically crying but it did hurt you on the inside so you're crying on the inside so I don't think what you did was wrong I think what they did was wrong and then that elicited a reaction from you yeah I agree with

you on like the for me I view hate as an active emotion like that's not a passing thing like the whole thing people like don't hold hate in you because like that takes so much energy disliking someone takes absolutely zero energy it is like passive as fuck like you don't have to think about it it's like whatever i don't like this person they don't take up brain space so like hate to me is like a reaction to hate like it's a reaction to something that's happened so i think in that moment you hated her and that's that's a completely justified response if that's how you were feeling um and also sometimes like with that feelings of like guilt especially when it comes to when other people are like emotional and like crying with it a lot of the time like

the reaction that we initially have to something is like anger and then when someone else is so upset by us calling someone else out and being angry with it that they get emotional that like it can make you emotional and not because it's oh i feel guilty i shouldn't have said that it's like well i'm sad too but i was channeling that into anger and now there's it's like breaking the seal one person cries then another person cries um but yeah I I think that like I don't think that you were wrong for saying how you feel I agree with your mom and call her bitch that's that's that's that's a good one um but yeah it's like a betrayal and I think like a betrayal is I don't mean dramatic in like a over dramatic or like acting kind of way but like a betrayal is like it's a

dramatic like shaken thing which is i think it's a natural reaction to have hate to it on a complete sidebar note and this is not what you wrote in about asking if you were wrong i do i will say the the i'm all here for the naming of one person as in yolanda as the person who killed selena but we cannot include hayley bieber in that level like that that no i give that poor woman a break like good god she did not kill literally anybody um but for your real life yolanda and hayley if you stand by it you stand by it if someone else wants you to feel guilty that's not your problem all right next up again okay i'm 18 she her asking about a situation involving my ex-boyfriend 18 he him we broke up over a month ago having dated around six months

on mutual terms and remained friends since checking up on each other and texting every other day oh bad vibes already bad vibes already i thought things were fine between us until i heard from a mutual friend that he's been talking about me to our mutual friend saying that he won our breakup in quotations because I'm dyeing my hair, which is completely irrelevant to him and that he broke up with me because I was too emotional. He didn't tell them that I was quote unquote too emotional because I cried and confided in him that I was essayed last year or because within a single week, my grandmother died and I started my first year of college knowing no one in my course in a difficult male dominated field. So I was overwhelmed with all

the change in my life. So I went to him for comfort about it. I always made sure to communicate with him and ask if he was okay and able to help me before seeking comfort in him. We broke up three weeks later. The mutual friend also told me that many of our other friends are saying to not like him anymore, are saying that they don't like him anymore because of how he's acting and treating me, but I don't think any of them will tell him that. I know I should just cut ties and be done with the situation, but the petty side of me wants to know if I would be wrong if I call him out and tell him that he's selfish and immature and being an asshole, that he'll never have a perfect relationship like he wants, and if he expects people to never go through hard times. I'm gonna

to say you would be wrong only because I do not think you're going to get the reaction out of it that you want. I don't think the sentiment is wrong. I don't think your feelings are wrong. I don't think you're wrong at all in the situation. But I think when we have these kinds of like movie moments of confronting, like you think of the movies of like confronting the bully, like are like saying something and having it, I'm going to like say my piece and all that. A lot of the time that the only time that we have that like cathartic release or we think that we're going to get that is when we we get the response that we're looking for and sometimes it can just make everything exponentially worse if someone has to say that they won the breakup to the person who

is a to someone who is aware of both parties in the breakup that means you didn't win it like you have to say it it's not you um but the i i agree with melissa and like the you're gonna have you're gonna go through heartbreak again at some point in your life and the best advice i can give like literally anyone going through that is the quicker that you can have closure on your own closure quote unquote and the quicker that you can do these things insularly without trying to gain a response from somebody else you'll be far more control in your life because if he's saying these things behind your back he's gonna he's not about to surprise you and be a wonderful person to your face he's just gonna be two-faced and that's not gonna it's

not gonna hit the same like write down everything you want to say fucking burn it fucking like do do something like that that feels more cathartic and then sit on it and if you want to say something go for it. But if it's just in like the heat of the moment, if a month goes by and you still don't like you still need to do it. Yeah. But you might the fire might die out. And that's an emotional response that's not going to get you what you want out of it. Unfortunately, I don't know this dude, but I know dudes like him. And I think that if you say something, it might actually make him feel like he wanted even more. Yeah. Or at least that's what he's going to go around and tell people that you're so mad and he's just cool and over it. All right. Excellent. Dear Megan and

Melissa, I have been meaning to write in about this for a while. My then friend, Sam of seven plus years, and I went on a trip to Florida in July of 2021. We started off at my family's home in Florida and then drove to Disney for a few days. Everything was great until our last night at Disney. We were freshly 21, so we were both drinking, and I accidentally overdid it. She took care of me that night. The next morning, we were supposed to go to Epcot and a helicopter tour. I insisted that we still go, but she refused and decided that we should drive back to the house. The entire four-hour ride there was silent. We got to the house around 2 p.m., and she decided she wanted to leave and get her own hotel room, despite there being another room for her in the

house where she could have stayed if she needed privacy. This really upset me. When we met up at the airport the next day to leave, it was like nothing happened. Fast forward to mid-August 2021 when we attended our friend's baby shower. At the time, Sam had a long-term boyfriend that she was cheating on with the boyfriend of another mutual friend that was there. She pretended to be best friends with her like nothing was happening. I was already considering cutting ties after Florida, but this made me completely stop talking to her. None of our mutual friends are still talking to her either due to other things she's done. Was I justified in ending the friendship? I don't have many friends, so sometimes I contemplate reaching

back out. I understand my role in this, but I also feel as though her actions were not justified. Would love to hear your thoughts, but I am sensitive. Thanks. all right so the drunk thing and her taking care of you i have been you on occasion um but i have also been sam and when i've been sam one thing about being you in that situation is that you don't completely remember everything that happened and so you may have said or done something that really offended Sam. So I completely understand Sam leaving and needing space, even if she was in a different room. Sometimes you just have to get away from that person. So I don't fault her for any of that. But the second situation, I, did you know beforehand that she was cheating

with the boyfriend of your mutual friend because it seems like you did that's a good point and the only reason you got mad is because she was being she was pretending to be that person's best friend but you were also pretending to be their friend because if you weren't pretending to be their friend then you would have told them that she was cheating or you would have stopped being friends with sam so justified ending the friendship maybe i don't i mean like if you didn't want to be friends with her yeah justified but like were you a good friend to this other person because you knew that she was cheating and

you were only mad because she was acting like she was friends with this other person might be reading something into it but i'm just going off the information that's there melissa that like this isn't even about me and this has never been me but like the the fucking deep cut that that that was you're so poignant like i wow you're right which is why you host this podcast so that's all i gotta say with those yeah i wholeheartedly agree with that like i didn't even put two and two together with that part of the end where yeah i i from the start though like like melissa said like i've also i've been i'm sure i've been sam may i don't know if i ever

have any of my friends like i used to get drunk with they'd be like shut the fuck up no we you were you were always this um so yeah so I've and like there's like a lot of like shame and embarrassment that comes like from that um and like I have all especially like after I stopped drinking like the amount of guilt that I have to like my college roommate I'm like oh my god and she's like she calls me Piper and she was like no Piper like I love you it doesn't matter don't worry about it I was like you know like I feel guilty all the time like I still feel guilty about it and that's like a level of self-awareness that I have because I don't drink anymore so like yeah you're not going to remember what you do you're not going to remember how you treat someone

especially like it's you know you went and stayed at your family's house if it's just you two there that can be like kind of a liability if you're even at Disney or not but if it's just both of like it can feel like a a really large burden there that even if you didn't get physical with her or say something negative to her like you could have been potentially instigating things with other people who are around or like it felt like things might escalate and like she wasn't gonna be able to like physically protect and keep both of you safe that's really hard um so i don't think that the lack of communication on her end for that like i think that's relatively justified like i think like you just kind of need a break um but i agree with everything melissa said about

the bridal shower like it does seem like we're looking at other people saying that they're not being good friends because they're not cluing in another party to a situation that's happening and that's also not what you're doing and i don't think that like i personally hold all of my friends the expectation the standard that like we will all tell each other things like i'm like shit happens i'm i'm gonna you're i'm gonna tell someone i'm gonna tell who i'm a cheating partner i'm gonna be like you taught you i've got 48 hours to tell or i'm telling like and that's how i'm gonna be there's no way i'm gonna kind of keep the peace there um it's a mutual friend and that's a betrayal there and you might not be actively participating

in the affair in the in in the adultery but like you have more information than the person who's being cheated on and you're not doing anything about it and like does that make you a good friend so I don't like Melissa said I don't think you're wrong for wanting to end the friendship if you want to end the friendship but I think that it's time for some like introspection of huh is am I acting and behaving in a way that I'm proud of and that like I would look at a friend who was making these choices and I would say like yeah I think that very much aligns with my morals and my ethos and like the kind of people I also want to be surrounded with. Hello, Megan and Melissa. I am a 25 year old girl currently living abroad

in an international volunteer program where the European community pays to house you and for food. Here's where my problem starts. The house in which we are entitled to is filled with just enough for two people to live in. And I know it sounds stupid, but right now I'm getting super annoyed with my roommate because she's constantly using the few food containers we have. She cooks for two or three days at a time and then puts the leftovers in the container in the fridge. The problem is that when I want to do the same, most of the time I can't because she's using all the containers. I know this is a pretty trivial matter and I could just buy more containers, but why do I have to spend my money when she doesn't know how to share the few things that

we have? So am I wrong to be getting irritated with the situation? I kind of feel bad for being annoyed by this compared to what I see every day in the project I'm in. So I guess I need someone to tell me that it's okay to feel like this, or if you think I am wrong, feel free to tell me to grow up and stop being petty. I don't think you're wrong for being like irritated, but I don't know if it was like a typo, but like you want to do what she's doing, but you're annoyed by what she's doing. And then she would be annoyed by what you're doing. And you're treating that as like, we don't know how to share. And it's like, okay, well then you want to do something where you're not sharing and I think like you both have like equal access and uh uh equal like say and

not call but you've got like equal equal opportunity yeah and like you're splitting things within the household so like it's it's not like you're subletting from someone and or you're a guest there and you're having some like you're both with the same resources in the same place like you're both have the exact same footing in the in this apartment um and that's like in terms of like legality and then you get into the gray area of like manners and like morals and like being considerate there's like nothing which doesn't have to be considerate the same way you don't have to be considerate but if you want someone to be considerate i think it's it's to ask as opposed to just getting irritated and upset about it some people me

hi maybe only child you've lived alone for a really long time or you're just not seeing the other person doing like meal planning meal prepping because you're taking all the containers but you're not realizing oh i don't see them ever do it and it's like oh well you have them it's like oh my bad there can be some absent-minded thing and or even just not even realizing that they're doing it and that's frustrating and irritating so i think bringing it up while you're not irritated of like, not, Hey, you do this thing that pisses me off that it's like, Oh, so I've noticed a problem that we have. And I think like the solution we should do is like, how about, so like you, you get to meal prep, like Monday, the top, like the food containers

will do meal prep for, I know that you'd like to do it on Sundays or something like, and I like to do mine on Wednesdays. You have them from these days to these days. I'll have them from these days to these days so we can rotate. So it works out well. And they might be like, Oh, I'll just buy more. They can go for it, but like they can't say, oh, well then no, I'm just going to keep using them because then I would be like, cool, I'm going to throw your food out and then I'm going to use them. Yeah. I think that this is a simple conversation. I don't, I think that you're letting the resentment that you have build up over something that's very small. She may be doing this and not realizing that she's doing this.

So just simply say, hey, I want to use the containers too. But if we both want to meal prep, why don't we go in half? Because a lot of times they sell them in big. If you both are financially able to, like if we can go in half and split. So then that way neither,

because you said you could buy, it's just the principle of it. So if you can buy, I then propose this, that y'all go in with some more so you both have enough containers. Yeah, I think the best thing we can always do and it applies to most situations, until you know it's a personal attack,

don't take it like a personal attack because that's how we can blow up at people and it's like really disproportionate and things don't get solved because we read into someone's intentions. That's like really, we're reading subtext that isn't there. All right, now we're going to take another break. now it's time for but are they wrong and that is when we pick somebody in the world that we

think it's wrong and this week there's been a lot of people but I'm just a lot of terrible people but I'm just trying to keep it light y'all know that it up until like April it was raining five months straight in LA which you know is good for the earth but it was terrible for the streets and our streets were already bad as it was and now they're just raggedy uh the pot there's potholes everywhere i was downtown a couple weeks ago and within a block i had to swerve and miss three different potholes our mayor karen bass last week announced a plan to address what she has called an unprecedented number of damaged streets across the city so since december 30th los angeles has received 19,692 service requests for repairs and as of april um actually for this

for those specific things i haven't really been um reporting them but i did make a report yesterday about something else uh and as of april 6 crews have filled at least 17,549 potholes so they're doing pretty good but one person the former governator arnold schwarzenegger took to the streets because he was angry and so he filled one of the potholes near him his spokesperson daniel ketchell which i think it's hilarious that he has a spokesperson to speak on this said that brentwood residents made repeated requests for repair since the winter storms opened up potholes and cracks on local roads and so the governor said today after the whole neighborhood has been upset about the giant pothole that's been screwing up cars and bicycles

for weeks. I went out with my team and fixed it. So there's a picture of him with some little boots on where you can see that he is kind of doing something, but you know, this other man is actually doing all the work. And he said, I went out with my team and fixed it. I always say, let's not complain. Let's do something about it. Here you go. Well, it turns out that what he said was a pothole wasn't actually a pothole. It was a trench that had been dug up for utility work and had been covered, but not like with the gravel stuff. And so the SoCal gas company had covered it with the temporary asphalt that is going to be replaced, but they just haven't got to it yet because they were going to do it um the pipeline system was completed january 26th but the rain

delayed it and it's usually done within 30 days so he was kind of being a little rachel but again this is like a light thing they uh did come out and fix it because they didn't want it to be messed up by what his team did um so it did speed it up so i guess arnold's thing helped it move faster but more so for safety this that like made me laugh so hard it like you can't tell me that's not straight out of an episode of veep that was probably my favorite piece of news in like the last week that was like oh news can be we can have like commentary on like people doing things that are shitty and stupid that aren't deadly dangerous and so destructive you know like low stakes so i would like to nominate the oklahoma sheriff's department oklahoma is kind of a reoccurring it's

like florida and oklahoma i was about to say i was like oklahoma like i don't even know how many times you've been brought up here like and every time oklahoma whatever happened you had you had a musical. And look at you. Downfall. Absolute downfall. So I don't know why. Actually, I do. So I'm on Los Angeles subreddits. And for some reason, they think, well, you're part of this city subreddit. Do you think you maybe would enjoy the Tulsa subreddit? Would you enjoy the Topeka subreddit? And I'm like, I'm so good. But suddenly, I end up in there. And I saw this one thing of a screenshot of a some police statement and just like or it was like a police statement from like a facebook group in oklahoma and like the head like the the redditor had like done a

caption of being like oh shit it's going down and i opened the comments and everyone's saying the same thing i go what are we talking about like what is the drama what is happening and i assumed this was some like niche sort of thing because it's it's popping off on this oklahoma one but i hadn't seen across my desk yet then i was on ap news and i finally got to the bottom of it and i'm just going to read you this headline and then we're going to get into it oklahoma sheriff says recording of killing talk was illegal what what exactly you go okay the the sheriff made a statement that talking the recording of talking about killing someone was illegal which you feel like duh and also what are we talking

about so a newspaper in oklahoma has a recording in which the sheriff and other county officials are reportedly heard discussing killing two of the journalists and then hanging black people and then they say oh yeah that was illegal and predicted felony charges will be filed this started with a post on the sheriff office facebook page and they've since had what were they like talking in the background and it got captured in a video or were they just outright on a video so the oklahoma governor is seeking resignation of the four county officials after a newspaper's audio recording apparently captured some of them complaining about two of the paper's journalists and then saying that they know hit men and where holes are dug

uh-huh uh-huh a portion of this recording was released by the paper and it appears to capture one of four making racist remarks about black people why is the independent not saying lynching that was specifically so the county officials it was the mccurtain county sheriff kevin clardy that sounds like the name that would be in like the oh the super villain clardy And the three other county officials, Sheriff's Captain Alicia or Alicia Manning, District 2 Commissioner Mark Jennings and Jail Administrator Larry Hendricks. Jail Administrator. Ooh, ooh, ooh. So the governor said, I am both appalled and disheartened to hear of the horrid comments made by officials. There's simply no place for such hateful rhetoric in the state of Oklahoma, especially by those who serve to represent a community through their respective office. sir that was a threat a literal death threat that is like that's not like horrible comments so the mccurtain gazette news released portions of the audio recording following march 6th county commission meeting in which mr mcclarty manning and jennings appear to be discussing reporters

bruce and chris willingham mr jennings tells mr cardi and miss manning i know where 2d polls are doug if you ever need them i've got an excavator mr jennings says he's all he also knows two or three hit men and adding they're very quiet guys he also complains about uh-huh he also complains about not being able to hang black people saying they've got more rights than we've got none of the four uh and all of the four have been reached out for comment they have yet to respond and then a spokesperson for the fbi's office in oklahoma city said like their agency policy is like not to confirm or deny an ongoing investigation which why like what do you this isn't like a sting operation yeah but it's still there can be interference from outside people

so they don't want to comment until they come to a conclusion yeah so the attorney general said that the agency received an audio recording is investigating the in this uh the incident and people gathered outside and were like resign you fucking crazy racist and so how it happened bruce willingham the longtime publisher of the mccurtain gazette news said the recording was made on march 6th he left a voice activated recorder inside the room after the county commissioner's meeting he like suspected that the group was going to continue to talk after the meeting had ended and which was a violation of the open opens meeting act so that's what he thought he was trying to capture um and he talked he talked on two

different occasions to their attorneys to make sure that he wasn't doing anything illegal before doing it and he says he believes the local officials were upset about stories we've run that cast the sheriff's office an unfavorable light including the death of bobby barrack a broke a broken bow oklahoma man who died in the hospital of march 22 after uh the mccurtain county deputy shot him with a stun gun and the newspapers also filed lawsuits against the sheriff's office trying to seek out body cam footage and he's turned over all of it to the fbi and so because he specifically recorded them trying to catch the fact that they were continuing essentially to talk about meeting and work business after the matter that the meeting

had been closed um there they don't have a right to privacy in that and so therefore the legal the recordings obtained are legal and then what i saw was posted on the reddit was the sheriff's department posting on facebook being like this didn't happen we don't know anything about this like what are you talking about and i was like what so the post on the sbi has already confirmed that there's an investigation going on so where is it okay i'm gonna read you this facebook post you can't tell me this doesn't sound like a fucking youtuber's old tweets were resurfaced like it's literally written like that the last 72 hours have been amongst the most difficult and disruptive in recent memory this is a very complex situation and one we regret having to

address. This is from a day ago. There is and has been an ongoing investigation into multiple significant violations of the Oklahoma Security Communications Act Title 13, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, which states that it's illegal to secretly record a conversation in which you are not involved in and do not have the consent to at least one of the involved parties. There's a significant number of victims of this criminal activity and has taken a significant effort in time to identify them and corroborate evidence. Many of these recordings, like the one published in the media outlets Friday have yet to be duly authenticated or validated. Our preliminary information indicates that the media release audio recording has, in fact, been altered.

The motivation for doing so remains unclear at this point. That matter is being actively investigated. In addition to being illegally obtained, the audio does not match the quote unquote transcription of that audio and is not precisely consistent with what has been put into print. Multiple agencies are assisting in this ongoing investigation. As a result, please, as a result of the press release that went out Friday, a large number of threats of violence, including death threats have been made against county employees and officials their friends and family maybe similar to those of the journalists there will be continued press releases from this agency as the investigation comes to a close and findings are forward forwarded to the appropriate

authorities for felony charges to be filed for those involved you you are impressive you want to you want to press felony charges to the journalists who legally obtained and reported you saying you wanted to kill them and also the person that recorded it said exactly why they did it yes

which is another violation yeah alright so that's it do us a favor go leave us a review you don't want to leave us a review also look in the show notes go take our

survey please also write in about Marvelous Mrs. Maisel first episode hot takes let's go let's go let's go let's go looking forward to it thank you all for joining us make sure you head on over to our Instagram

at any time before Tuesday and you will see the votes and you can participate who you think was wrong in each situation would love to hear from you and as always we love to hear your feedback so if you're like disagree with this one agree with this one here are some thoughts that i have

word vomit into those dms we love to read them and you can catch the results on fisting friday oh yeah so thank you for joining us we enjoyed it hope that you enjoyed it and so we will circle back but am i wrong is a production by me megan ranks and me melissa demonts plus diamond imprint productions. Post-production by Coco Lorenz and production assistance by Melanie D. Watson.