Don't Blame Me! - Melisa's Friendship Breakup with Khloe Kardashian

Episode Date: July 11, 2023

Melisa and Meghan are back with another episode of their weekly podcast! This week, they're talking about all the things that are making them angry. Melisa is angry about a misunderstanding she had about a booking that led to her period coming 2 weeks early. She's also angry about the different PMS symptoms that she experiences, which are making her even angrier. Meghan is angry about something that happened at work. She's also angry about her neighbor growing corn, and her husband's desire to join a golf club. But even though they're angry, Melisa and Meghan still find a way to laugh about it all. They talk about Shaq, Meghan's in-laws being in town, and their plans to take field trips. Melisa also met Kylie and Kendall Jenner for money and is best friends with Khloe Kardashian in another dimension. So if you're feeling angry, or just need a good laugh, then this episode is for you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

hello megan hello melissa it is tuesday and i believe this is the first time we're recording see you next tuesday on a tuesday in maybe a month i feel like you know i can't i can't argue because uh i can always argue but i i don't think i can argue on that because as i tried to rack my brain i go well i have had a cold for a month so i'm not a reliable narrator it's not just the cold but like we there was a tuesday that we rescheduled because you were meeting with your team and then i was doing something like we were gonna i don't know oh yeah you were like let's switch it up and i said that's perfect i was just about to text you and ask if we could switch it up yep and then you were sick for a couple weeks and yeah so this is the first time

we're doing a tuesday in a while tuesday tuesday tuesday i have to say recording on a thursday last week had me feeling like this was the longest weekend of my life because i was like that to me that was a tuesday i was gonna ask you if we should start recording on thursday because i think we're it's fun but then we could only do it every other thursday because i do gabe's podcast on every other thursday i love switching it up so do i and so um but we were only doing that because we did this on tuesdays and i think tuesdays are actually better for Gabe so maybe we can I love that yeah the early beginning of the week I'm confused you know I mean like I'm just like trying to get my footing Thursday I'm like I know what it is it's

it's the week like I've been here before and then it's easier to like find things yeah I don't know no you're right I think that's a good call let's do it yeah wow everyone you heard it here first um we'll still call it see you next Tuesday because it's still gonna come out on Tuesdays um so what's new with you you almost flashed me your entire titty well i've seen yours enough well i also don't have glasses on so i prefer i still can't even full great even if you gave me a full show i'd be like can't see it you flash your tits all the time constantly uh what's new with me i don't believe anything because i am thick in script writing i like how you said that because it felt like you weren't even answering my question you're just like i don't believe in

anything and i was like oh okay um so yeah i'm trying to go through what i did last week I just here's one thing I thought that I was directing an audiobook on June 17th and 18th and I haven't done one in a studio at all this would have been the first one because I started directing during a pandemic yeah and then like mostly they've been like you know working from home is perfectly fine like we don't need anybody in and but then this one it's two people that have a podcast and they were like the vibes might be better if you're with them to do it so um sunday after i had my writing lab i got in the car and i drove luckily it was just in west hollywood and it's on a sunday so it took me 15 minutes to get there so i go and i'm like trying

to open the door to this place and it's locked and then i tracked down the owner's cell phone number i'm like hey i'm trying to get in what's the deal and he was like we don't have anything scheduled for today i look down and it's for july 17th and 18th are you in town yeah i'll be in town okay um but it is on a tuesday so we well perfect well good thing we're switching to thursdays for uh some time yeah um so i've had it on my calendar and i was like rushing to meet with the producer last week because this is a different type of book

and I was like like are you going to break down who's going to read what why are we on top of this team so I rushed a meeting and she's like

we've got time like I had the meeting she's like we've got time so you can discuss I was like it's just this week what do you mean

we have time she should have if I was on the other end of it as someone who's done it a hundred times would have been like I just want to clarify

you know it's July yeah so there's that that's incredibly relatable um i i would have i i don't even say i would have done this i do the same thing all the time like i do things like that all the time but they usually don't like we booked this last month they usually do not book this far in advance so i was like of course it's in june of course yeah so i had that happening um my period i told you that my

period came two weeks early which is great but i have realized now i've now i'm officially like a year off of birth control you know at this point and so i have three different types of pms oh and so i have period flu uh-huh i have um horrendous cramps uh-huh and then i just have anger uh-huh and this is the anger oh i know like so um i've just been mad that's fair and you know last week when we record i was very happy so that must have been all of my excitement leaving my body that was your you were ovulating like like it was like yeah here's you know i was like i just woke up in a good mood i looked high yeah that was true you even said it you verbalized it and i go i i just had a little cramp but it went away so it must have been all the serotonin

had come to the surface and was leaving my body yeah to just be angry yeah and so um i was been i've been angry for the last few days you told me the three and i'm usually the first two i go and you go anger and i go yep uh-huh i understand and uh the anchor one is different in a way that i just can't describe i'm just mad but like in a weird way and even this weekend i was like i was mad at myself because i'm like i'm being lazy but then i'm like first of all i know that laziness is a myth like it's just something it's not actually a thing but i was just like do something lazy cunt and i just had no at least you included one word of love in there and i and so i was i just i'm just you know but i am thankful y'all don't know this but

it came two weeks early and i'm going on a trip in at this point in a week and a half it did sound like you're like i'm not pregnant everyone's like whoa and so um yeah so count your small blessings yeah the universe is like you said you wanted a hocation here's your fucking vacation I understand though the annoyed like the like the anger thing I it's funny even when we're no longer like synced up or we have not our cycles are even if they're not matched reflective of the times um I last week and I'm starting to kind of get out of it was in an angry mood because i was just still sick but i couldn't verbalize why and it wasn't i wasn't even calling it anger it was like a level of irritated and annoyed that was

like i can't function like light was annoying sounds were fucking annoying people were like literally no one could say or do anything that i'd be like this is just obnoxious like everything was like grating on my last fucking nerve yep and it was oh my god i i literally had that all last week and i'm finally starting to get through the hump of it so i understand that feeling i've literally we're if you're watching this week's videos we're in my living room because i had a live show for another show where we were filming out here and every time i'd walk into my living room i was just angry that stuff was in the living room even though i had i could have moved it but i was just like i don't feel like doing this yeah and then that's when the quote

unquote laziness was set in and it's just a cycle yeah i i understand but hey this is comfy this room is a lot more we feel more airy and we see the sun so we know that time is passing yes it's nice when are you gonna be done with your period well it just started on like saturday so a couple my period like it'll be heavy for a few days and then it'll stop for a couple days and then it comes back so it rears its head again yeah yeah usually after the end though when i was having a i would just be like i'm just gonna fucking free bleed like if i yeah during the nighttime 100 i'm bleeding no like you can't expect me to that's how like when i was just consistently bleeding for seven months straight i just got to the point where i go i don't care

all my new underwear like i just can't do it anymore well i'm so excited for your hocation thank you get some white pants to celebrate i'm too messy for that yeah i i think about that i just bought two pairs i don't understand how black women wear black uh all white anything because the makeup but all the time i'm like what are y'all doing because i when i hug i know i'm short but when i hug people i literally go on my tiptoes so i don't put my face on them because i get makeup on them yeah but you wouldn't get makeup on yourself i'm still touching my face all the time and then it gets on my fingers and i'm touching things and this is how germs are passed this makes sense yeah no that's true yeah you

could do um even like right now i was just scrapping my pants to me are tops makeup on it i'm like if i'm wearing a white top wear it for an hour and fingers crossed i can sometimes put a white shirt on while i have makeup on i go well that's dirty and i need what just pull it over my head but pants i typically a little bit better with but it can't be at home because then i will be too casual it's like when you lay on a pillow if you have makeup on like i have to take my makeup off because i'm just going to start touching my face if i'm at home but if i'm out of the house and i'm sitting and i know i'm going to be sitting um inside then i think i could wear white pants but granted i am returning both the pairs that i got well hey hey hey so you want to start a garden

yeah and you should well not a garden garden like a just flower flower bit but do you want to leave a flower bed here or do you want to get buy one and then you can bring it with you no i think the real excitement for me is to use a claw you know what i'm talking about we put it in the ground and then twist it that's really the most the thing that i'm most excited and i go god i want to get yeah like that's what i'm most excited about and there's just this clear patch right here in front of my house juicy looks red and i just really want to get in there i'll take you to the nursery that we've been going to it's gorgeous we've got so much fun you can get so many cute little plants um and i have stumbled upon flower farm tiktok

and i know we have so many plans for future endeavors of ours but boy oh boy do we need to buy a flower farm and just you just grow flowers and people buy them on the side there's like some pretty flowers over here that bloom but i don't know what what was happening right here in the front of this big window i don't know what was happening but there it's like manicured on the other side completely fine but no but i mean even on the other like here like here i know i'm looking at my compass i know but i'm saying even with your company i just mean just further down that way there's so much stuff but it's not stuff that's facing this way it's in the same thing but i'm gonna i'm gonna tear this up

i'm gonna talk to yeah it's gonna be great it's gonna be great that's so fun i'm in my gardening era and leo just responded to my story about trying to get some gardening shoes and he goes we're in our gardening era i'm like what are you gardening he's like what are you gardening and like this is just the vibe that our neighbors are also gardening you know what you should plant which would look really cute some poppies yeah i was looking into that poppies some lavender um i know you hate it hey i can probably just give you some of mine that was gonna be the plan you can stick it in there i'll get a ziploc so i don't have to touch it on my hands and get the smell and then my neighbors i've been walking and running a lot and so i've been experiencing

the different smells of the neighborhood and over here i don't know what it is but it smells so fucking good they have their whole back their whole back um yard is it um and i want to get that whatever it is can you know what the plan is no i don't no no can you see it i can send you my app oh yeah will you just take a picture of the plant i have i have the app too i just don't use it it's my favorite thing i'm doing the neighborhood walks but then you can be like oh this is working in your yard and we live across from each other so this should probably work in my yard yeah um but they're always whenever i pass by i'm like hi i just need to say hey last time they were arguing with their teenagers so i was like i won't you're like let

me just listen in by the way um i know that you you obviously i mean i drive here so i like see people but i think if you don't already we need to figure out who's the person who's growing corn somebody's growing someone's growing corn and they've been growing corn where time you've lived year outside of their house but like where like in their front yard who i don't know what are you talking about they're growing corn like but physically where is the house that you're speaking of in the vicinity of where i turn so there's like three different options of streets that it would be and i'm gonna do when when moths picks me up and we leave i'm gonna have us do a loop-de-loop around to see if i can find the corn people i must have not walked past

their home yeah no because we would have talked about it or i was thinking you would have already known them because i think somebody would have befriended the person who's growing corn in their front yard i wonder if they were the same somebody when i first moved in somebody had chickens because i would hear them every morning i don't feel aligned i don't hear them anymore so they're not there but somebody had chickens at some point i was just obsessed with the idea of someone growing corn in their that's wild front yard that's wild like that cuts off all of the light like you you can't that's what i'm saying like it was privacy corn melissa it wasn't privacy shrubs they were had privacy corn it was as tall it was almost as tall as the house like it was

up to the windows corn grows very fast yes i know i was like should we get corn and mom's like no why not i know i think maybe where our trellis is maybe just put one in and just see how it does i know i need to like de-weed and like do some like heavy lifting yard work i did some this weekend i repotted plants because um people were like oh yeah you i like ignored the instructions where it said only plant one in a one cosmo in a six inch pot and i go how about three no only one in an eight inch pot and i said how about six in a six inch pot and it didn't work out so well So I repotted them and, uh, Mott's is wanting to join a golf court club. Sorry, everybody.

He's not listening. I kept calling it, uh, golf games and I go, sorry, tournaments. Um, but he wants to join a golf club. And I was like, I'm here to support you. Like, you know, we'll look at the financials, like whatever, like trust, you know, happy for you here to support. i was like the only thing i ask is that we are able to set up my garden the same time that you were doing that so that can be so you can have your like in your hobby totally fine the issue

is with my hobby i need your fucking help first and then i don't need your help but like it makes sense i need some help at the start um and if that doesn't work i'll just i'll beg my neighbors so help me probably better off i mean i'm gonna i'm gonna confer with them like so what do you think about we're running everything by them and they're like we've never owned a house before i go but you've just got you know what intrinsically you know what you're doing they know about the chart they do and if you want to drop that we don't they know about the chart and they were like Megan stop comparing you guys to us and I go I know it's a losing game but um I think it'll be so fun because then when we have like I have like flower seeds and shit I can give you my and

then we can you know I've got packed there's packets over there flower seeds nice I took them from um the hotel that allison had for her bachelorette party they like just gave away whatever flowers yeah so there and i just took a whole bunch of packets so i have some wow i love that are you gonna grow any vegetables you've already gone through that phase it was a tomato no it was tomatoes and onions and potatoes you did yeah during the pandemic i was doing a lot of stuff i thought we were just doing the the green onions potatoes in there too by the way you've inspired me pretty much every food that is spoiled in my fridge or on my counter i i'm just gonna put it in dirt and see what happens yeah yes you should and like i don't know i asked my

nephew what we should plant he said a toy tree so he said how we do that is we get a toy we put it in a toy bucket with toy soil we stir it up then we put it in a tree and then the toy comes out of the toy tree but then he's going to be sad when it doesn't actually happen or you create this whole fantasy where you just put a plane out there and then put toys that you're going to give him like was and i was a child and the necklace tree which i thought necklaces grew mart i thought mardi gras beads grew on trees and i was like i love this and then i found out about titties and i went what oh hey different different stories for different age different appropriate ages but he also said that um oh he was like and then you you should grow a house on a tree and i go

if we could grow houses on trees we would be very very rich my guy have you seen those 3d printed houses that people are doing now no i have issues with 3d printing mostly i feel like it smells and it seems loud and it seems construction is loud as a whole oh totally but i think like and also construction smells bad yeah no i think it's cool i just where do you have these computers that can burn houses or you put the pieces to build them no it looks like they have like i've seen videos of it there's like actual like computers out in the street yet we can't make a fucking printer that works actually i'm no longer going to speak ill on printers as long as shaq's contract is on shaquille might take like you're personally

attacking him first of all i would never and if you were able to search how many times i talk about shaq it's only glowing things and it's very often i'm surprised there hasn't been an ai generated episode can you imagine megan talks about love island down shaq do you want me to see what i can what it would come up with if i did morrison megan talk about shack imagine that they bring up um who's that one that i fucking hate who i always says trying to be shack and he's never gonna be shack i don't know who you're talking he's like the new hulk he's like hulk hogan but now he was in trainwreck john cena john cena imagine what if it has like ai megan be like you know i know you like shack but i really like john cena then i will

know that ai is gaining intelligence and they're using it to troll us which i think artificial intelligence being used to troll people is not a bad thing is this not just like a glorified ask jeeves or like the the smarter child like those like aim sort of things where you would enter in or like um it's the same technology as the askinator and stuff yeah but i think it's a little bit more in depth this one when i did this prompt it didn't put it in auto fill our names in it no i know i just mostly wonder if uh like did the people who the idea of like whoever created ask jeeves or wrote the code for the ask like the that they've had their heyday are they getting paid out now with all this ai do you mean like have they created something that'd be really cool

yeah it didn't do as a good job I guess that tells me we have to talk about Shackmore we gotta talk about Shackmore do you want to read it out loud do you want me to no and I won't if you don't want me to

is it funny no because it's like hosts and guests and it didn't auto do our names and it doesn't have our names anywhere in here um fired and that's the big g isn't it yeah oh i'd put in the exact same thing that i did before i said

write a podcast conversation for the show don't blame me about but i put about shack and then when i guess i guess when i did the about shack it threw it off yeah well not very good at what it's supposed to be doing what'd you do this weekend my in-laws are in town this weekend they got into town on thursday no wednesday tuesday someday last day last week so they'll be here for over a week um i assumed that i got the dates wrong when mods was like oh yeah my parent and i was like oh and he goes no no i like definitely told you the wrong days and i was like you don't i probably remembered wrong he goes

no no i definitely thought they were coming next weekend um so they came into town um they were at the moths and his brother took their dad to the u.s open that's a golf one right was there a tennis one that sounds like that i don't know why i always am like that sounds like tennis there's u.s open for golf and u.s open for tennis oh great so i've been treading lightly trying to be like am i saying the right one and realizing they're both fucking right um so they went to that and um so we've been we took them to the nursery they helped us pick out a tomato plant um they we've like done like dinner and stuff we went over to his brother wife and their kid their new apartment and been hanging out with them and they i think they leave thursday

something like that so i've been on like full host mode so like the kind where it's like we clean our house before they got here and then we clean it like we have to keep it clean you i mean because like it's it's the we have guests coming and we got guests coming we got guests coming um so that's been fun um and we also had our final on friday i think it was our final ac quote for our heat pump nice it's a lot of money but we're doing it like i was like we're calling them probably tomorrow great congratulations thank you i'm so excited as i look into the forecast of it being in the mid to high 80s coming up i'm like it's finally getting warm but the issue is like it was cold and now it's like getting hot yeah that's what i'm saying warm

stay like tempted when i say warm i mean hot but because it's just been you know you could just walk outside and you know be fine in a sweatshirt but now it's to the point where i walk outside if i have a sweatshirt on my under tits are lit exactly and it's just and there's a there's a small window of time where i can ride with my convertible top down yeah and so it once it gets over 76 degrees i can't do it anymore it's too fucking hot no it makes my scalp hot when it's the direct sun on it oh luckily i have thick hair so it's make your hair feel hot yes my hair does get hot but i have i've been going usually when in the um summer my hair gets light like it's brown yeah like my hair is brown in the summer and it hasn't

done it because i the last couple years i hadn't been going outside but now it's brown again so she's ready for the dominican republic i am but it's gonna be white for then i brought the fucking box of makeup and left it in the car i was looking for it when you i thought that was why motz was coming to the door well it was but i got cocky and i just like for some reason i forgot that to carry it like he was carrying two of my bags and i just grabbed my water bottle i left my water bottle in my car a couple days ago and i just haven't gone outside to get it and there's that well i'm hoping it's okay with warm water bottles stick me out well it's a a cup so really that one that has my name on the side of it oh so i can just yeah that's

fine yeah it's not like there's no crevasses um what else did i write on here that i was going to tell you while you're looking it up um it's currently 4 23 and i just opened my dms and um my friend cj at 416 he sent me a message and said i've never had eggs benedict or hollandaise sauce but now i gotta find me a brunch this weekend because there's y'all podcast first of all cj i didn't know you listened to this show and now i feel like i've talked about you numerous times now i need to act accordingly yes i have to act accordingly and i also just talked he was the one that said that uh i remember that that video of quinta reminded him of me so now like cj you're gonna cj you're gonna turn into coco you're gonna get name checks like imagine yeah wow shocked now

shocked that's fucking funny yeah um i don't remember what i had wrote down i don't remember what i had written down um but uh i we've talked about this so many times before like i just constantly give them free press um brook and connor's podcast all the time and so because of that i like have had auto playing of um cody and noelle like like cody was like a guest on one of them because it's in their studio and then i saw a suggestion of i didn't watch it so i'm not i'm not gonna like claim that i did so cody and noelle have this series and i don't know why it took me seeing them do this to like we should do that because i didn't watch it it said cody and noelle do blah blah blah and i go am i gonna melissa do field trips i think yes we need to do a field

we've talked about this before so you it wasn't this has been on the table before great it was during i was not inspired you were not inspired it was um right before the pandemic hit we talked about doing oh yeah yeah so it's like uh chloe and courtney take miami but um who do you want to be courtney offy okay did you see chloe kardashian revealed the name of her baby like almost a year later no she had a baby she did she had a second baby here's the thing that i think is a little the card like are the kardashians gonna start naming their children like never in my life did i think there was a crossover between mormon mommy vloggers and she named her son tatum which is a totally cute name is a relatively popular name is it in specifically in like the youtuber

tiktok mormon mom community do their names not all have like a a letter true and tatum because thompson i thought they did it across the the family no do that that's all the k's in the that side and then penelope is one of i don't know any of these children them but yeah i just thought like i wonder like you know people talk about like kardashians are leading the trends which no but they're making money off of the trends and so they're popularizing them in like in a in a financial incentive kind of way so i'm like okay so is it this like clean girl aesthetic like we're getting back to like is this like is this becoming the beige babies so wait the baby has been alive for a whole year and they just revealed the name which

as tatum and to me that's not a wait why and why did we wait for tatum like there was there's chicago there's psalm like there are this is who i think that's one of well i used to call it like psalm in the bible i thought it was psalm but you told me it's pronounced psalm okay i'm only going based off no psalm is yes yeah yeah i just didn't know that i don't think i gave you the context of what it was i think i said psalm and you said that is not how you say it and i go how do you pronounce that word you said psalm and i said okay and we moved on so i'm just wondering is this the new era are the kardashians gonna have babies and name them like mckinley i cannot believe in the last week of me doing podcasts across the board

this is the second time i'm talking about the kardashians wow who else brought it up kate and lesha are now very heavily involved in the kardashians like they never watched any of the shows before and now with their big ages they're watching they watch the news series and they are hooked and now they're going back to watch the first seasons and i was like it's not the same it won't um but they're like really invested in it and i said interesting and then i showed them the picture of me and kylie and kindle did i tell you this story i don't remember if i told it on the podcast what did you like accidentally go to a mall where they're doing a meetup and then take a picture nope it wasn't an accident you aren't intentional with one of the kids nope they were

they i don't know half of them weren't even alive then hold on oh my god let me send you the picture so i can tell you the story i love that when we do this with each other where you send me a picture with them and i'm like look at this picture of me and ravenstone after i won a contest i forgot this picture existed until they were talking so much about them um and then i remembered uh girl what so as y'all know i used to do tax grab it back in the day and someone hired me for 500 to go and get the contact information for their manager now anyone that is you couldn't google it anyone that knows anything about them at that point in time knows who their primary manager was it was chris so i tap tap tap tap tap went on and found

chris's contact information and sent it to this person but i got up at like four o'clock in the morning keep in mind i got paid five hundred dollars to go get the contact information which i already had so i waited in line i was watching i had this is right when netflix had dropped where you could like download videos to your tablet so i sat there watched the video i was one of the first people there calabasas so i was no it was santa monica okay pier or the promenade it go and the woman the girl wanted like proof that i was there and so i was like okay so i had to take a selfie with them so that's where this picture came across and kendall goes you don't want to take another one because i'm barely in this picture to say melissa this photo

they're hot like this is either just for the bit no but it makes a lot of sense this is a proof of life yes and and so kennel was like you don't want to take another picture i said no i'm good like everybody one of melissa's eyes is in it half of your nose most of your mouth and none of your body like that's your floating face like your body is not listen your body's not in the photo no there's i just loaded my five hundred dollars but your neck isn't that long like how is your body i have a short neck uh very agile apparently yeah and then the person was like asking who all was there and i was like i don't know these people's names but it was people i guests that were on the by the time it got to this point in kardashians when they were like

18 or whatever i didn't care anymore so i didn't know who any of their people were yeah and so i was just describing the people she was like oh that's blah blah blah and i was like okay but who is this person who they just hired me on task i don't know who they were do you still have the email that was associated with your task graphic because like i would love to know no it was my yahoo and the yahoo got hacked and so i don't have that anymore because like do you think that this was the part like do you think this was sugar bear hair gummy founder or like do you think this was i don't know like someone who wanted them to like my fit tea like do you think it's someone who wanted to like sponsor them maybe or but like they were saying they did want they did

want a collaboration so and they lived here though yeah and they couldn't go yeah i don't know if they might not have lived here i don't remember but yeah apparently they weren't very tech savvy either but actually you know what it wasn't the stuff where you could download straight to netflix wasn't a thing but the uh promenade has wi-fi and so i was able to use my wi-fi outside while i was sitting on the ground so did you even like pretend to go up and like was chris there no so they wanted you to go even though you're like i have their contact information i didn't tell them that i had ahead of time did you how did you tell them that you got the contact information i just said i went

and i was in line i was they signed something i think yeah they had to have they have they've got pictures of themselves so yeah so they gave me this where it is now i don't know um in the trash uh so um they thought i was just there for a meet and greet and it was i was the least excited person to be there of course a quarter of your face yes uh and they were yeah they just wanted proof that i went and they the whole thing was like can you ask them like ask them what the information was and i was like i saw that they were like the person that reached out to me and i saw this and i was like i can get this information real quick i don't even have to go so did you write it on did you write it on that where they that the pictures of themselves that

they signed like saying like oh this is i just typed it up and sent it i didn't even write it that the easiest five hundred dollars i've ever met made in my life like without a doubt like that's just because they opened the thing even they opened it up at like six in the morning so i was there for two hours and i have to and i was like the third person in line they i saw a clip on tiktok i don't watch the show but i saw a clip on tiktok of them talking about remember when we used to like shut down malls melissa you were there i was there you were there i was there i don't even yeah because it was it was the mile wasn't even open yet and they were in pack sun and so we were just there's a sponsorship with pack sun during that

time with their collab yeah so there was a line outside and i just sat there were people like controlling it and i just sat in the line third person there definitely get because i was like i have to get in because i knew they were going to cut it off so i was like i get there early just sat out watching that i watched a couple movies what was that movie about um that dude that was cooking like bradley cooper no the one with charlotte uh kathryn taylor jones john fravro oh chef yeah i love that movie and i watched that while i was sitting outside oh nice yeah wow melissa i can't believe you've never told me this story i can't believe i haven't either but i legit forgot about it we're titled this episode melissa met kendall jenner no melissa

met kylie jenner no offense kendall don't you think it'll be titled whatever ai decides to title AI titled this we'll be like what we don't know how this is so I can't we're posting this picture yes wow this is I legit forgot and then I had to search because I knew it was in my photos but I couldn't remember when it was and so I searched their names because you know yeah it'll show but it picked up on as it says Kendall and Kylie on the table so it picked it up this is what people think living in la is just an everyday like occurrence like you get five hundred dollars to meet kendall and kylie jenner and sometimes that is what la like is like you know yeah i can't the people in the line were so ecstatic and i'm just sitting there with my

headphones on vibing by mice and everybody was like with friends yeah i'm by myself just watching the movie how nice is it for them they go you're not really in that picture do you want to take they offered you to let you take another and you said i'm good that's literally legit what i said but you i have to say you you're giving a very sincere smile right here so like i don't i'm thinking about the the dollars yeah i can see 500 in your eyes 250 in each eye just actually no you'll i can only see one eye so i see 500 in total in that eye that is so fucking funny wow wow wow wow i love when rich people don't know how to use google like that's the theme of this story rich people they don't know how to use google

well everybody let us know um your experience meeting i won't get into mine let us know your experience meeting kendall and kylie jenner and um if you've met a kardashian tell us about it i had a dream one time that i was like legit friends with them like chloe specifically so much that i thought that it was one of those dreams that felt so real and i was like i'm a friend no like like for days after i was like am i friends with chloe do i know her like kardashian i was like and it was very graphic like so graphic you mean vivid but like like i mean like like how yes it was vivid but like it was not graphic as in like gratuitous sex but like to the point where like i felt real it felt real like for days i was like and then like a year

later i was like that happened right or no well i don't i remember and then you're like so why did we stop being yes what was our falling out I mean I've had I had a reoccurring dream Selena Gomez was trying to kill me it took me years to realize that that was a dream and I just thought I had some weird beef with her yeah actually now that you say that I wonder if there are some celebrities that not in the sense that I have like an affinity for them but that I really dislike for no reason based on dreams I wonder if it's because I they were in a dream and I go they gave me bad vibes in a dream yeah like i remember like being it was when they lived together like i remember like being with like hanging out vividly with chloe kardashian but like all of them were

there but it was like chloe was the one i was closest to were malika and khadijah there yeah so you it was you didn't swap places no i was friends with them too we had malika namely like khadijah was like around well that's legitimately how the show was khadijah malika was number one and khadijah was around and so it was actually chloe malika and melissa then khadijah was just around you know in this alternate universe i see it yeah and i but i feel like in real life i'd probably be if i were to pick friends with them would be more courtney than anyone but i don't like it it felt so like sometimes i still think about it and i was like did this happen my close person my childhood friend that's so fucking funny how old is chloe

it didn't happen i know it didn't but i'm just like that would be the one that i'm closest to an age which makes sense she's a little too like i think like you know she does too much well and also i was gonna say like chloe in in the early seasons and you in that time i think you would have been friends courtney now courtney is like i don't know her birthday is but courtney's got fucking weird ass aquarius energy so that would fit with you yeah it's uh like i i remember there was like and it was like like it would happen i would have dreams like every other night were you taking melatonin yeah um someone else told me when they i saw a video of someone else taking melatonin and they

had a dream about a celebrity and it was like a reoccurring celebrity dream yeah my selena gomez was a reoccurring celebrity dream with melatonin so yeah it's melatonin melatonin melatonin is fucking with lives but like it would be like like like it like every night it was like us hanging out at a different place you go to sleep i remember back to your friend yeah like we'd be at the one time we were throwing a party and like catering fuck something up oh my god and i was like the person like yelling at catering um of course because khadijah's just doing that yeah the one time we like all went to get our hair done together it was like in it was like i was living a whole different life in my dreams one time we went to like this cabin

and um wow like it was supposed to be this really nice cabin that's where we got in our fight that's where the fight happened i'm gonna see myself that's where the fight happened you can see the face of realization she said that's where we fought it was something it was like a cabin but the cabin also had like a hair salon in it and um and we got in a fight and but then we were like like we made up in a different a different night it was every night i'd go to sleep and it'd be a new what are we doing with the kardashians well mainly with chloe me and kim did not get along there was one where we were having a party at this like mansion that was rented out and there was um there was a a chandelier i remember and i was me and kim were at the top and i don't think

it was ever like anything ever got but like we just like would be like mean mugging each other like we did not get along i mean dance battle the start of a duel so can you imagine that like one day you're at nobu having a business meeting who do you see across the restaurant chloe and she looks at you and she goes melissa and then you go chloe and you've both been having these dreams about each other but both of you're like i think we were just astral projecting and became friends that is fucking hilarious now we need to find another meetup so we can we can arrange a meet cute yeah as we talk i'm just thinking of other instances how many years did this go on a while you need to pop a melatonin tonight and see if you go right back to where

it feels like it feels really good it feels really good you're mourning the friendship i'm like remembering like all these things would you rather have a dream like this and then like not that i'm saying you're sad you wake up and you're not friends with chloe kardashian but like but like there's the first time you are like the friend the friend and the chloe in the dream you're like r.i.p like miss that girl like wish you wish this was a thing would you rather have those dreams like when you wake up and you're sad or would you rather have like nightmares and shitty dreams where you're glad when you wake up no i was like hanging out with rich people come on and this was before they were like billionaire rich like yeah so you were in the you were you were

getting that early treatment was jordan woods ever like no this was no because this was way before jordan jordan was still a child at this time no but when you were dreaming what do you mean like when did you stop having these dreams oh no it was before because i didn't even know when was the kardashian lore no this was this was like this was like when chloe was like had like that do you remember she had that radio show i was gonna say it's french montana in this the i don't she wasn't dating anyone yet this was before she was starting to date people this was when she had like that radio show that was about her yeah like struggling with love like she couldn't find anybody to date so it was before all of that this is you know before she was using

all those body treatments and things did you guys go to dash yes yeah yep we went to the one the one the one that was uh in melrose yep yeah we i was in dash all the time um wait was terrence jay there because that's who hosted with courtney i mean with chloe on the radio show i don't remember i'm gonna tell you right now i don't even remember i don't remember terrence jay being on the show i just remember there's a post of her with her finger up and she's like shh yeah chloe after dark but i think she started dating french montana shortly thereafter i our friendship was over with by then you broke up with the melatonin so like did you stop taking melatonin or did like i think i switched brands i was always switching

brands i don't know imagine there's a mass recall because people started having dreams about yeah celebrities wow you know she sounds like a great girl i hope we get to meet her someday i have this friendship like she sounds amazing and also like the fact that like khadijah gets like shafted even in the dream like in not reality yeah i think i think i was close with malika they both seem they both seem cool really cool yeah but i think i was close to malika and chloe i think khadijah's opted out though you know i mean like i think khadijah's like i'm good with this proxy to fame yeah yeah because it was one of those courtney and yeah miami when they were taking but that but malika was like the like part of like the main cast of that one was it that

one it was one of those she was the main cast and i think this is whenever that was happening that's when the dreams were happening do you did you watch it before bed no that was during the time where i was always watching um chelsea handler before i went to bed if only you could be friends with chelsea handler in your dream and then make that happen in real life i mean i've actually met chelsea in real life so that is one i've gone i was i went to chelsea's show several times sometimes i should have been there but i've finished um oh they did a new york one too yeah there were several of them like a couple of them so that's why i was telling kate and i was like you'll never run out of content because you have all the spinoffs too

chloe and lamar courtney and chloe take the hamptons and then kylie had a reality show and then they did dash dolls you know who starred in dash dolls malika and khadija wow so well all these feelings the cabin one feels the most real the cabin one and the one when me and kim were beefing in the uh mansion we rented out for the party i don't know why but in my head i'm just picturing it as like the joey graceffa mansion from like escape tonight No, it was bright. It wasn't that dark.

I don't remember. Yeah, it was all white. Okay. And there was a big chandelier at the top of the stairs. And that's where me and Kim were beefing. I think that's what Chris's house looked like. I think so, too. I'm remembering that Christmas picture.

The Christmas picture that they took. And then they had, like, Photoshopped some people in that weren't there. It might have been that house, to be honest. Okay, so we need to make this happen. Because the way that you're describing this, i feel like chloe's gonna recognize you like i've been in your dreams i'm exhausted i've been running through where i've missed you i've been running through your dreams for years then what you just cut me off cold turkey yeah i've been hanging out on some other people's dreams and

they are not nearly as fun it's so weird don't you like love when sometimes like you're like one time i had a dream that like my dream was just like i made a movie in my dream and i go why can't i just like wake up and write all that down like that was a full-length movie i used to have full dreams like that but i would wake like i would wake myself up i could i figured out how and I would write down what the ideas were. I wonder where that notebook is. Wow. It was before I had taken like an actual,

it was when I was planning on moving to LA and I hadn't yet. I'd also be like in these same dreams, I'd be cracking full mathematical codes. Like I'd just be sitting, there'd be a board and I'm just like mathing it up. Wow. That's really fucking impressive.

i was trying to google mine uh because i i didn't write it down in my notes app i did it in google but i think i must have deleted the um search but the other night i had a dream and this man was in my dream and when i went i looked at my google like the next morning i wrote his name down and it's a real person's name but like it's not like anyone famous yeah but i was like this was the man's name who was in my dream i wonder if i can see how can i see my entire history do you want it across your computer and phone i did it just in here if only i googled less because i'm already like i like now that they have the google journey so when you go to your search it connects the different things you were searching for i don't know if you can do it from

your phone but you definitely can do it on your computer where it's like this is the path you were on on this day that's it would have a conniption trying to find mine i looked up pang pang keely williams pang pang's a panda in china vince staples was the man in my dreams like the singer is that a singer yeah vince staples i think vince or maybe it was vincent vincent vince no or vincent stapleton i'm so sorry no vince staples is a rapper that was not what i was like i was looking up vince staples but the name of the guy i was looking up sounds like that i'm gonna keep scrolling because i was talking about him in um he was on a tiktok and i was like oh my god the guy from uh abbott elementary like he's such a good actor and

like he's a rapper like he's a very good music and i was like what and then i listened to his music and then i was like oh he's great and i was like and monster goes of course you like him i go why would you say that he goes gap tooth bitch and i go gap tooth bitch i believe yeah then staples also has a gap tooth that's what i'm saying that was that was when i was like oh i love him here's the issue is i have no concept of time so like i don't know when i would have done this it's fine i looked up the word gusto i looked up can you get no you're looking gusto up because that's the uh the um thing to use for payroll that i told you about oh well that's a good good call to remind me of that because i looked it up on my mind went to gusto sure honey baked

ham okay too much time it's fine wow maybe this is a fucking journey thank you so much for taking me on this it started with you you were the one that was talking about them well i couldn't even tell you what i was saying your story it like everything else pales in comparison um now everybody um i'm not going to share my story i've told you my story right i don't think you've told me i definitely have i don't know but positive experience totally positive experience very funny very very very funny okay big leo energy leo's recognize leo's okay okay well thank you all let us know um about your reoccurring dream starring one of the kardashian family i'm really messed up

about this she's really fucking torn up maybe you should dm chloe chloe even follow her i didn't even know she had another kid until you just told me for truman tatum a bigger pivot that's where it started you're talking about yeah no that's what i just realized yeah okay well um there you go this is a whole hour y'all get got a super juicy see you next tuesday i i'm i'm a super juicy cunt got that what baby see you next time bye See you next Tuesday.