Don't Blame Me! - S1E12: Firsts!

Episode Date: September 15, 2017

Hey hey! Welcome back for a brand new episode. This week I’m sharing my wisdom on what to do if a guy seems like he’s not interested, dealing with emotions during your period (and everything else that comes with that), AND how to face your boyfriend’s family after you’ve slept with his twin brother. Yikes!I want to hear all of your questions that you need help with. Plus some follow up calls if you’ve already called in. Call me at...[phone] or international listeners email me at [e-mail]...with your question and as much detail as possible. And I will do my best to offer my words of wisdom.If you’re under 18, please get your parent’s permission. Advice is for entertainment purposes only. Don’t blame me if it ruins your life. lol, jk, my advice is always the best.[phone]. Do it!Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/join/dontblameme See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I saw my friend on the other side of the street. I was heading to school with the kids. I let go of mom's hand to wave. I had already forgotten their lunches. I ran over to hug her. She came out of nowhere. And then... It stopped.

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Search free until August 31st. Visit Ancestry.ca for details. Terms apply. oh my gosh hello everybody and welcome back to another episode of don't blame me with me megan ranks whoo i've been listening to my own podcast too much because i'm like waiting for the music to like kick in in my ears but it doesn't happen till post it's a fun fact for you all i don't record this with that little like shoe up but up in the background which would be cool. If you're new here, this is my advice podcast where I, a incredibly intelligent and super worldly, well-lived person of an elderly 24 years of age, give you all really

fantastic advice to change your lives on topics that I may or may not have had any personal experience with. Yes, it is a very professional podcast with me, Megan Rinks. Hi, you should follow me on Instagram. I say that because I'm dangerously close to 1.4. I'm still at 1.3. But I would love to get a little kick over the edge. Also, my Instagram aesthetic has been pretty on point recently. Yay. So welcome back, guys. If you have not called in to our number before, what have you been doing aside from watching Freakish, hopefully season two on Hulu? It's not out yet, but it'll be out soon. But yeah, if you guys want to call and leave a voicemail asking for advice and telling me things in your life that you would like my input on,

you can leave a voicemail at 310-694-0976. Again, you can call this number and leave a voicemail at 310-694-0976. I'd also like to note that this is the first time ever that I have memorized that number. I wrote it down and we had, I mean, we had to double check it because we weren't sure if I knew it, but I did. I had it memorized. It's very exciting. You know, it's not very exciting, Jack is gone. Not forever, everybody. Don't be too sad. He is sick.

What's he sick with? Oh, Mel's here, by the way. Hello. Mel's always here, but now Mel has like, she's got a microphone in front of her. Yeah. So what's Jack sick with? He's got a cold and a fever. And he sounds awful.

Oh, no. I wonder what his sick clothes are. Like matching sweatpants. He had on a t-shirt and sweatpants when we picked up the equipment. Oh, sniffling and sneezing everywhere. Gross. super sick well jack we hope you feel better but the show will go on without you and now there's now now i guess i have no one to banter off with but i'm gonna force mel to do some of it so

it's gonna hear a lot of my voice but um yeah without all the blibbering and blabbering i guess i mean should i update on my life or anything do people care you just finish your movie oh that is this is me like not so subtle segue i'd be like mel ask me about my movie so i don't sound like an asshole who's like hi so i just finished a movie oh my god wow what a funny segue yeah guys if you have been dormant on my social media you wouldn't have noticed but you probably have I've probably posted like 15 different times about this on Instagram but I just wrapped my first movie and today I actually posted like an incredibly long and sappy post all about it which is very unlike me it was such a long post that I wrote it out on my computer and

then texted it to myself to use as the caption but yeah it was super exciting it's something that's been under wraps for a while the movie is called honored and um fun fact which most of the people who are on this production didn't even know uh i created the story i didn't write the entire script but i um basically had created like four different characters and a plot summary and an outline of a cool movie that i would like to watch and be in and then hired a writer who wrote a script and then we sold that script to lions gate and that was like almost four years ago and then suddenly we filmed it so it's really exciting we had so much fun um and yeah if you guys want to follow the instagram account or the facebook account or the twitter account of the movie it's

all at honored movie and we don't know when it's going to be released yet or where it's going to be released but if you follow those things it will tell you and i will also tell you eventually but um yeah it was it was a great deal of fun and i'm also hoping to get some of my co-stars from the movie to be guests on the podcast it's very exciting it is very exciting i'm i cannot wait it's gonna be good they're all very excited i've told them that they have to swear and like say things like penis and they're like all about it karuchi's all about it sasha's like yeah i can say penis so it'll be good but yeah guys this is exciting stuff with my life so enough about me talking about myself um why don't we go to calls and then i can talk about myself through answering

your questions hi I am I'm 12 years old um I wanted to ask you for help because I'm going into sixth grade GMT and I am very nervous because it's just like very nerve-wracking and I don't have anyone to help me because my parents say that i like so much about it but i was wondering if you could help me and i would appreciate it my first automatic reaction is oh my god i cannot believe someone who's not even in sixth grade watching my videos i'm a terrible influence i need to reevaluate my brand secondly um going into sixth grade i will be super honest with you six like the transition from fifth grade to sixth grade is it's a lot there's this whole thing where like there's a lot of like radical or like super

liberal um school districts that are trying to like eradicate like middle schools in general because like you're just putting together like the meanest group of kids like as soon as you get to be like 11 to like 13 14 like i'll be real just terrible everyone no one is awesome or at their prime or just doing everything right when they're that age um so it's hard i think knowing going into it that it's kind of going to be like not like it's a wash and you're like oh whatever who cares about it but i think if you go into it knowing that it's a transitional phase for everybody and like everybody is super nervous i had a super hard time going from fifth grade to sixth grade because i went to an incredibly incredibly small elementary school and i went

to like okay if anyone understands i wasn't like i'm like a hippier version of waldorf montessori school so like i came from like i had like six kids in my like elementary graduating class like i didn't know science i didn't know history like i didn't even have to take the star tests because everyone's like no it's not good to give like i called my teachers by their first name so like i went into middle school and then i went to a normal middle school and it was like kind of uh was this my phone oh sorry guys um uh i then yeah so then i went out to middle school it was like definitely a shock to the system because it was just a normal standard public middle school like we had like you know bomb threats and lockdowns all those like very standard

typical middle school things but no it was hard and I definitely was like a super freak like I let my freak flag fly like way too high and for way too long into middle school um but yeah I think just knowing that everyone else is going to be nervous and then also kind of just um in knowing that everyone else is going to be nervous as much as it might be out of character for you to like reach out to people to make friends it's also a good time to kind of not reinvent yourself fully but kind of do things that you might not characterize as something that's like very you to do like oh i'm too shy to do that well this is middle school no one knows that you're too shy to do that so reach out to somebody and like make friends with someone because i guarantee you as

scary as that feels the person who you're like reaching out to wants you to do that 10 times more than you do so everyone is equally as if not more nervous than you and if you can kind of stomach it and pretend you're not nervous and just kind of fake it and um reach out to people and make friends I think everyone is going to be stoked about it because everyone is super nervous and if anyone's acting like they're not nervous they're just taking this advice and pretending they're not nervous okay on to the next call um I'm uh 14 and um I've liked this guy since kindergarten and he like kind of knows that I like him because like my friends like just told him little hints or like they just told him and every time he tries to talk to me I like just

hi I can only talk to him sometimes when he doesn't want to ask me about anything so um yeah school's starting up again but there's a school event that I'm going to and I uh he's going to be there and I want to tell him but I can't and he I recently broke up with my old friend that me and her got into arguments and we're not friends anymore. So she might hate me. And one of my other old friends that we got into a fight about, she likes him, but she knew that I liked him since kindergarten. And I don't really know what to do because he has his best friend. and I kind of like him too and I but like he's starting to become my friend too

and I just don't know what to do so I I really need help about that I think you just gotta live your best 14 year old life um first of all this sounds like me in middle school where it's like I have a crush on this guy but I also kind of think it's friend super cute but like I don't know if I like it's friend but I am gonna like this guy because he might like me back and then my friends and i all aren't friends because we like the same guy which is jack might make me are you gonna make me bleep the name if i reference someone that i did this to probably okay well we're just gonna add it now so his name was so whatever i'm not gonna call my name but no there was this guy that i had a crush on granted like my element my middle school life was

like my group of girlfriends my group of guy friends and then it was this whole like incestual thing of like us like liking the same guy and like slow dancing with the same guy and be like oh my and I hate you I can't believe you did that and I definitely lost friends over guys in middle school I had crushes over that the big one that I feel like I might have even referenced this before is there was this guy that one of my really good friends and I in middle school we both had a crush on and granted he was like one of the only cute guys in our middle school so like 90% of our school had a crush on this guy and I liked him he liked me and I had told my friend that I liked him and she was like I don't really I like him too you can't pursue anything with him but we probably

used way less eloquent words because they were like way younger um and then I was like no I really like him we're gonna go through with this and she got so mad at me we stopped being friends and then the guy was like yeah it seems like a lot of drama I don't want to be a part of this and I was like what so I just lost a friend because I thought you and I were going to be a thing and granted a thing at that age is also like not really that much of anything and it was also that the stakes were heightened because there was so much drama surrounding it that I thought I liked him a lot more than i did um and i'm not saying that that's the case with you in this situation but i think it's kind of looking i think girl friendships like that whole thing is super

super important and if you can practice at a young age really valuing like the other girls in your life and not competing with them and like building each other up and not like yeah not competing like over guys with them and all that kind of stuff i think it's a really good habit like to get into practice of. But I mean, if you like this guy, I think then you say that you like him. You just kind of have to look at the situation as a whole. And if it's awkward and it's going to be weird, that's unavoidable. And if you might like his friend and you aren't sure if it's worth it to say anything to him, it's probably not. I think the whole thing that I've always said when it comes to telling someone how you feel about them is you have to do it for you. You can't do it

in hopes of what they say back. And if your feelings for someone are conditional, if they like you back it's not really real feelings so if you feel the need to tell him that you like him um then there can't be any sort of pressure on him to like you back too and then also understand if it's worth kind of risking your friendships for and who knows if you really like this guy that much because you apparently also think his friend is cute if i understood the call right but i think you got to live your best 14 year old life don't stress about it too much because there's going to be far more drama when you get to high school because then boys their voices drop other things drop and there's alcohol so don't do that yet that i mean i i wouldn't say spend don't spend

all of your um time and energy dealing with so much drama when you're this age because it only gets worse when you're older and the next one okay hi i'm and i'm 15 and so long story short i'm talking to this kid well it's like i don't really know how to explain what it is like we're talking but like we're dating i guess like we've done things already like okay so i've snuck out multiple times and he's snuck in my house multiple times and and so let's just say that we've had sex and like it's fine like i don't know how to explain it like it's sex like okay he was my first kiss he might do this happened like a little bit over two months ago like we met during school and he was like hey and so we started talking and we're not like officially

dating but we're doing things that couples would do i guess but lately he's been acting kind of weird and i don't know what that means like he's like oh baby i'm like princess like he's stuff like that and now he's just like like he's not saying those things anymore and I don't know it's weird I guess and so like I don't know like it's just been weird and he's been like really short like I tell him like good morning and he's like GM like okay like I don't know if that means that he doesn't like me anymore he just doesn't know how to tell me like I just need help figuring whether or not figuring out if you still like me or not so yeah thanks sometimes I like when these are a little more up in the air

but this one seems oh this pains me to say it seems pretty pretty clear I think oh god I want to give you a hug I think he's just over this um and I'm so sorry I'm really trying to rack my right to like spin this in a positive way that there could be another option but I I think you're I think you already know you've already kind of said it I think you you're seeing the fact that he's he I wouldn't say he's breadcrumbing you which is one of my least favorite things that people do but he's definitely I think he's definitely sort of doing that thing you do I mean okay I almost said that you do at that age but I'll be real I think I've done this now to at this age where you kind of make it seem like it's the other person's idea. And if you

start kind of treating someone not so awesome and having that stark contrast, maybe that person will do the dirty work and break up with you or end things for you, which is not the mature way to go about it. I mean, granted, I'll say I've definitely done that too, but I think that's what this is. And I think you, you've got options in the sense of you can take that for what it is and be like, okay, you know what? I'm going to walk away. I'm good. I'm fine with all of that stuff or you can okay let me just state that the previous thing I just said is what I would definitely do but if you really feel like you want to know for sure then you can ask him and you can be like hey um I just want to have like an open honest conversation with you and just going into

this I would really love if you could be totally honest with me not sparing my feelings and all that stuff I just really want to get to the bottom of this because I don't want to be wasting either of our time um it doesn't seem like you're as invested in this as you were before which is totally okay and understandable. I would just like to know because I don't want to be putting forth time and energy into something that is ultimately not going anywhere. And then if he tells you that he's not interested in you anymore, you just got to take that. And I think if you're going to be asking those tough questions, you got to be ready for the tough answers and the responses to all of that stuff. Me personally, I definitely would not be able to take it. And I

would just be like, oh, okay, cool. You're trying to push me away. I'm just going to like go away without getting the full feedback of it. I'm also not a huge believer in closure in general, but if you feel like that's something that you would like to know and you feel like you can handle it and take it, as much as, that's one of those things, as much as you're like,

oh, I know the answer to the question and I know what you're gonna say when you say something, hearing it back is really, really, really fucking hard. So I think if you're ready for that, you can, but my personal advice is I would just, I would just kind of take some like big, big, big, massive steps back and if he reaches out to you and um not that i'm saying like serve him his own medicine but i think

if you if you kind of start to back off and you don't text him and you you sort of just like not fully ghost him but like ease away um and he reaches out to you i think the only time that i would give him the time of day is if he reaches out to you and he's like hey are we okay i'd like to fix stuff between us what's going on but i think if he texts you at like 3 a.m in like a month and a half and he's like hey what's up cutie like what you've been doing then you kind of you kind of know what he's out there for um and i also think it's important to know that how he treated you at the beginning versus how he treats you now is not normal in the sense of like the person that you're going to end up with and the person who's going to be like a really great

compassionate partner is going to treat you like you're awesome from the beginning to the end there isn't kind of that fizzle out sort of phase i think when it comes to like being older in the honeymoon phase all that stuff definitely fades but that like level of respect and kind of reciprocation to how you act towards somebody, that's not really going to go away. So I don't also think it's something that you need to learn to deal with because eventually you won't have to, I think it's better to kind of get in the habit of being like, nope, I don't deserve this. I deserve way more. Let me say goodbye until I get something that is something that's fun and someone doing what I'm giving me, what I'm giving them, which is what I would say. Oh, I am so sorry.

He sounds terrible. Okay. He doesn't sound, I mean, okay. He sounds terrible. I'm sorry if everything works i mean i'm happy if everything works out between you but i'm sorry if everything works out and you hear this and you're like megan you were totally wrong and now you make him sound like a terrible person i'm sorry i just want to give you a hug call back and let us know oh yes good call please call back and let us know and then if if it goes really really terribly wrong we can like you know eat dairy-free ice cream and cross out pictures of him in your yearbook definitely i have a lot of high school yearbooks with pictures crossed out of boys so if you need someone to do that with I am so available I hope everything ends up okay ah okay I guess it's time

for the next call I'm sorry hey Megan Rakes it's me um I'm I'm gonna be 13 um I just um I started my period recently and um I don't know how to control myself because I'm going insane and it's literally the worst thing in my entire life. I just was hoping you could like give me some advice. Dude, periods suck. Speaking of, I'm like five days late. What day is it? I'm like six days late. Stressed out. It's okay, guys. Don't worry about it. I'm worried about it. No, I'm not. I'm not pregnant. Don't worry. Okay. Periods suck. They're the absolute worst. Oh my God. Especially when you first. Yeah. No, it's the worst. I mean, I think uh god I just I want to know why they're the worst for you like if you're I mean if we're

talking like cramps big fan of my doll huge fan love it um heating compresses are great too if you're talking like emotional like you feel like you're going batshit crazy um hang this is terrible this is not terrible advice this is me hang out with like a couple of girls who also have their periods and you guys can all get synced up and then you can be absolutely crazy together um I am currently on the same cycle as two of my friends who i just did the movie with and we loved we loved it we had so much fun doing it together because doing it together doing that period thing together because we would just like sit in a circle and just all eat a ton of food and not make ourselves feel bad about like one person eating a ton of food at one time and then

we would all just be like absolutely like wallowing emotional messes together so i think if you kind of embrace that and accept that um that that's just a thing and if your friends aren't going through it right now they will definitely at a certain point but I think finding it's kind of the same thing when it comes to mood swings with anything finding stuff that like makes you happy and I'm also a big fan of things that are like distracting so um I mean if you really need a good cry sure throw in a Nicholas Sparks movie but if anything that would just make me way sadder so throw on like Iron Man or something like that where you're like this is funny um not funny this is like an intense action movie or throw on a comedy or something like that but it's something

that um i wish i could say gets easier with age doesn't really it just kind of sucks but being a girl's cool and awesome and it means your body's doing all the things that's supposed to be doing so that's good and um be happy that you're not the person who like a parent threw a period party with for yeah yeah that's the thing it's a thing that was a you know a weird norcal hippie family thing yeah it happens everywhere i know people in arkansas that did that a period party yeah yeah that weirds me out me too i'm like all pro-feminist like eat your placenta if you want to but like period party i do not want to wear a dress when i'm bleeding out i'm bleeding out gross we lost our two male listeners awesome well also exercise helps for some people it does

it actually does that's one of the things that i i get terrible cramps like i when i was oh my god like 50 no younger than 15 like the first year that i got my period like 13 or 14 i had a cramp induced like seizure. Cause my whole body, like, cause it's your muscles and they like cramp up and they seize. Um, and I have had like a, such a hard time, like dealing with cramps as I've gotten older. Um, but exercise is one of those things that I'm like, if I can accurately time my, uh, my doll that I it's like slowly kicking in as I'm getting ready to go work out. It's amazing. That's great. And chocolate always helps too. And French fries. That's what the doctor prescribes french fries and my doll but exercise that's a good one go on a run or a walk

a walk yeah that helps with emotions and with the cramping oh okay dr melon my house oh okay great so i expect a lot of um pictures of you on a walk eating chocolate and crying you don't have to cry if you want to cry you can cry okay guys we are going to take a quick break but we will be right back don't miss us too hard miss us hard gross this episode of don't blame me is brought to you by you yeah you did it good job you you didn't even know you were doing it but do you know what you did you guys left awesome reviews on the apple podcast app and we greatly appreciate it and this is not us telling you to stop it's telling us telling you to do it more do it all the time leave a review when you wake up in the morning leave one before you go to bed at night leave

one on a Tuesday and a Monday and a Wednesday and a Thursday and I said the date of the week wrong but guys leave the reviews not only do they make me feel good when I'm having a bad day and I can just look at the reviews of my podcast make people really like me but they also help other people find this podcast which also is great because it makes us film it and record it um all the time which is so much fun and a lot of you guys in these reviews have been asking for them to be weekly and wow that would be a lot of a lot of a lot of time energy but hey if you leave a ton of reviews maybe maybe we'll be able to find the time to do it every week but i thought i would read some of my favorite reviews so i've scrolled and found one and this one says perfect for a long

drive by sex addicts i'm not kidding and i also didn't even read the name until i just read it aloud and i was like oh okay uh my boyfriend and i now i can't think about anything but her boyfriend or sex addicts oh good god my boyfriend and i are in the midst of a cross-country road trip and after listening to music various cds and a few other podcasts we decided to give don't blame me decided to give don't blame me what okay it's so great i love this already and oh goodness this advice is hilarious and kind of shitty advice but it's so entertaining and from the heart and the lack of filter is so entertaining we love laughing at the advice because it's so true but also the but also the hard things that you don't want to hear which I love I'm glad I love when people

appreciate the tough love of it which I think is really nice um so thanks sex addicts um and then i'm going to read another one okay oh this one is really nice and i also don't know how many episodes they've listened to because the title of it is open-minded and welcoming which is not two words i would use to describe maybe i'm open-minded but like am i welcoming um and she says megan or he megan does such a great job of withholding any sort of judgment i find myself thinking that most of the calls are a bit ridiculous and childish but then megan's responses always remind me that what was important to me as a teenager is very different from what is important

to me now thanks for creating a safe zone and putting me in my place Megan which I think is so nice that's so sweet and I also makes me wonder did I laugh at anyone too much like the girl who said her boyfriend wanted her to shit on her face which he really definitely meant sit oh good god I wonder how she's doing are you listening could you please call us back okay well I hope you guys enjoyed those um reading reviews of my podcast and if you guys want to hear your lovely review be read then you should go leave a review on the apple podcast app five stars only because i'm an asshole uber driver who won't let you out of the car until you do five stars those are creepy people okay guys um anyways i'm gonna stop talking and now i'm gonna get into me talking that's not about

me but it's still about me okay me again kiss brb and we're back and we're going into our next call so i had one advice about going after college um i want to go off to maybe a school like four hours away from my home but then i also don't want to leave my parents because they're kind of like attached to me um and i also if i do go off to college um I have a problem with like choosing my major so I was wondering if you can like give me advice um on how to choose like what I want well not tell me what to major in but like help me and guide me okay thank you I think you gotta go where you want to go um a college in that age as a college dropout i can really um wholeheartedly say that it's an important time for you to be

selfish and kind of just focus on you um which i mean i me dropping out too it's like definitely a selfish decision not what anyone else wanted but you kind of like this is if you don't learn how to do things for you at that age it's so hard because as soon as you become like a total people pleaser and not even just with people that you're friends with or people like your teachers and stuff but like even with your parents and the people in your life if you're so used to doing everything that caters towards them you're not going to realize what you want to do because you've spent so long doing what everyone else wants you to do so I think like choosing a school wise your parents will survive everyone will survive I think going away if it's like a feasible

like financial option for you I would go wherever you it is that you want to go because you need to take the time to like learn and grow as an adult and spread your wings um as like when it comes to like a major god college sucks in the sense of you think that you can just like go to college you're like I'm gonna take a bunch of courses and figure out what I want to major in and then you're like oh psych I have to be in college for seven years because nothing that I took was really a prerequisite for anything else um so I think if you can think about things that interest you now and try and take courses in them your first or second semester or quarter at school wherever you end up going um and then from there just like also understanding that what you major in in school

doesn't dictate your career like the amount of friends I have who major in communications where I'm like do you do you communicate on a daily basis does your job require you to be a really good communicator they're like yeah I'm like okay or friends I have like who are psychology majors who now work in sales like your major doesn't fully dictate what you're gonna go do if you want to be a doctor or a lawyer or anything like that like doing like the pre-law pre-med do you even do that in undergrad yeah you do okay i actually have a degree in biology and i'm a producer so it doesn't matter it doesn't at all do what interests you and what fascinates you and if you want to change i think it's also like there's that stress of like i know so many people

who changed their majors like six times because like, well, it's not the career I want to do. And then they graduated and went to a totally different career. I'm like, you spend an extra year and a half in college changing your major because you're like, my English major is not going to work because I've decided that I want to be a scientist.

And now you're like, then you're like chemistry major does not translate into the fact that now you work in like sales for like a travel company. So I think if you kind of do whatever it is that interests you and don't put yourself in a box in, don't put yourself in a box in like, oh I have to choose this major and I have to go ahead and go do this kind of stuff but then also knowing that um if there's something you want to do majoring something in something similar is good

and if you change your mind that's also totally okay because as much as your college education matters as a whole um employers aren't really fully looking at your degree like what you majored in and what your degree is in unless you're going into a profession that requires a certain degree But find a college that makes you excited to learn and then pick things that make you like pick whatever excites you when you want to pick courses and all that stuff. Yeah, I like my junior year because my plan was to go to dental school and my junior year. I was like, I don't want to do this anymore. So I wouldn't talk to my counselor. So talk to your counselor because they have answers. And she was like, oh, you took some like play classes and stuff just for fun. Like, why don't you look into the entertainment field? And I was like, I hadn't thought about that before.

and so just talk talk to them um also do internships too because that working in the field that you think you might doing an internship can help you see if that's what you actually want to do too good advice from an actual college grad who's way more equipped to give you answers on this question than me a college dropout now i think that's a good idea internships focus and all that stuff yeah you'll be fine just stay in school michelle obama will be disappointed if you don't she's still our first lady true never forget next call I'm 22 years old and I'm currently dating someone who's the sweetest kindest mostly absolutely perfect man I've ever met in my entire life um and the only problem is when I was 18 years old I was looking for love in all the wrong

places and I went on a date with his brother his brother then ghosted me after you know we went on a date and to be vindictive and to get my revenge I went out with his older brother's identical twin brother and so that means I have gone out with not only um my current boyfriend's identical twin brothers but I've also slept with both of them the only problem with that now is um I have actually fallen head over heels for their younger brother and I just go to a family event soon and the problem with that is I know it's going to happen and if his brothers haven't said anything they probably will and I don't know how to go about this um I'm no longer the vindictive 18 year old I was. I've changed a lot and I've grown. I've had to go through experiences that have

changed me and shaped me into the 22 year old young woman I am. And because of that, I really hope that this doesn't change my relationship status, but I feel like it will. And I don't know how to go about handling this. I just don't know what to do at this point. And it's kind of nerve-wracking because you know i might have just met someone who's supposed to be with me who i'm supposed to end up with and i may have fucked it up when i was 18 years old and pardon that language but i am scared wow holy shit dude this is fucking dramatic and i'm not gonna downplay this you're in a fucking pickle you are you are in that pickle jar and you are like safety sealed holy shit wow um oh my god first of all i feel like i would be friends with you you sound i spit so much just

then but you sound wow you you this this sounds like something that would have happened to me um wow um first of all dude homie i'm a level with you the fuck did you not tell him when you started dating him like you you you you you're an awesome human but you done goofed with that one it's i don't know how long you guys have been dating did she say how long she's been dating him okay so okay so maybe you haven't been dating for that long um but maybe you have been and if you've been dating for a while she thinks that he's the love of her life oh my god oh god you gotta tell you you have to tell him at the same time i can't i dude he might not be he might not be cool with this at all at all at all at all and even i think it's a lot better if he hears it from

you than his brothers both of them right oh dude you're a savage i love it but um yeah you gotta be the one to tell him um and even if you like ditch this family event you're just putting it off longer because eventually it'll come out and then also um your your past prior self could never have known that you would have ended up really falling for this guy so you can't you can't put that kind of blame on like you like oh i might have messed it up without even knowing it because also if he is like the love of your life or whatever none of this is actually gonna matter like if he wants to be with you and you want to be with him and like you're supposed to end up together the fact that you did you sleep with both of his brothers damn dude i love you and i know

that's not what you want to hear right now but like i know that you're upset that you did this at 18 but 18 year old you and 18 year old megan would have gotten up to some shit together um but yeah i think if he's the right guy it would be kind of one of those like well we have to deal with this but i think also it's a kind of a good telltale sign if he's in it for the long haul and he sees the same sort of future that with you that you see with him if he's willing to stick around for it and if not then whatever um but yeah i i think you gotta tell him sooner rather than later the longer you wait the more shady it seems and the worse it's gonna be so i think you just gotta rip the band-aid off way before the family event and then tell him like tell him

everything that you've said like you can even be like I literally called into a podcast with this girl I used to watch on YouTube in 2009 um because was I on YouTube in 2009 maybe um because like I really didn't know what to do and I think if you're just honest and apologetic and there's there's there's really nothing you can say to defend yourself in this situation um and I think if you kind of just like yo I felt so weird I didn't know how to bring it up and I should have brought it up sooner and I'm so sorry but I I don't know if you've heard of this at all and I think half the reason why I didn't tell you from the beginning is because there's a part of me that kind of had hoped you had already known so I wouldn't have to address it but now that we're

going to this I just really want to make sure everything's out in the open and just and just say it point blank and just be like I'm really sorry and I really have feelings for you and obviously I really care about you because neither of those other things worked out and I wouldn't be with you um and I wouldn't be with you uh if I had like anything had happened between with me and them and all that kind of stuff um and then you kind of got to take his reaction however it's going to be because it's a weird situation and if he's not comfortable with it that has to be okay but that also means he's definitely like not your guy but oh my god this one you literally have to call and give us a follow-up like you have to like I'm forcing you because I'm so wildly curious

there's also part of me that wants to know where you live and if I can attend this family function and I can just like wear a disguise because I want to see it go down I'm so curious I love other people's drama it's so bad I love it I love it and I but this one I feel a little more personally invested in because you you know who I am so I'm like oh no I want your I don't want your life to like blow up in front of your face and I don't think it will I think I mean no matter what you're either gonna figure out this guy is the guy for you and he's gonna be cool with it and everything's gonna be fine even if you have to go through a rocky patch or he's not the guy for you and everything's gonna be like shit for a little while and then you're gonna meet some other guy

and you're like well okay this had to happen so i could get to this place but shit man yeah i also want to know do you guys not take pictures on social media true because his brothers would have seen you yeah is he close with his brothers he's like oh my new girlfriend oh yeah oh actually that could be if they ever don't have a good relationship that could be in her favor or if They have a good relationship. But he also might already not know and might he might already know and not give a shit. Right. Like it might be like a whatever because that was years ago thing.

Or the brothers haven't told him. Yeah. Oh, but how could you do that? Or maybe maybe you look wildly different. Who knows? Maybe she got a nose job like me and like no one recognizes her from before. Oh, my gosh. What about the mom and the parents?

Right. Yeah. You have to tell. You have to. because this is just a sarah jessica parker movie yeah if they don't know and then you show up then it's even weirder so you have to tell them before do you feel like it's a wedding i feel like the event's a wedding it's either a wedding or family reunion i hope it's a oh i'm just picturing it feels like a sarah jessica parker moment and she's gonna drop the strata and she's like screaming and

owen wilson's like it's okay oh i've never seen the family stone totally not related to this but i feel like that's what's gonna happen with this so you need you yeah you need to tell him because then also if you're awesome and you tell him he might be like level with you and be like i'm so glad you told me but i'm real with you i don't think it's a great idea for you to come to this event anymore but i think you have to tell him and avoiding the event doesn't do any good you just got to rip the band-aid off and you didn't fuck it up um if anything there's just life happens and all that kind of stuff and it throws things at you and if you guys can deal with this and handle it together then he's the right guy and if not he's not oh they're gonna have to deal with

it eventually because if they really are soulmates then it's eventually gonna happen 100 to be around them oh completely and or also like other things that might happen in your relationship like this could not be the first bump this could be like one of a bajillion bumps do you have a sister maybe he fucked your sister is that just one incestuous yeah oh good god i also love that there's a twin in this situation that makes this so much better no it's like i was oh god dude also i just i'm so sorry also do you live in a small town like slim pickings no but damn yeah you know you know it's you're gonna be fine all right well we are coming to the end so you know what time it is it's oh my god do we still have producer's corner oh my god guys we got a producer's

corner question even though oh not that i i get yeah is he doing it from beyond the grave that's he's doing it he's doing it from his sick bed he's phoning it in okay hey megan um so here's my question my friend just got invited to his 10-year high school reunion and uh he just told me he doesn't want to go which i just think is really foolish because i went a couple years ago And I have to say, it was very eye-opening to see where everyone I went to high school with was 10 years later after graduating. And I think he's kind of making a big mistake for not to go. So what sort of advice would you give me to tell him and to convince him that he's missing out on a huge opportunity? Because I really think he should go, and it's a very eye-opening experience.

What do you think? Thanks. Bye. tell your friend to go because they're probably killing it and awesome and dress like you and they're sick and cool and then they can go back and rub it in the faces everyone from high school who doesn't look sick and awesome and cool which is like my petty answer but then also I think it's also just fascinating to like see everyone that you went to school with and all that kind of things and even if it's not to rub it in anyone's faces about like oh look where I'm at look how great I'm at even if you're not where you want to be in life and you're afraid that everyone's where they're exactly where they want to be first of all you seem to be buying into like the highlight

reel of instagram but then also i think it's just it's it's fascinating and cool to see how people have grown up i'm um not even i'm not close to my 10-year high school reunion yet but i'm definitely gonna go i definitely want to like look at the girls who are mean to me who are like oh i was like super smart and super cool and like just like see them and like slightly hope that they got really fat and like i don't know all that petty terrible stuff but no i think it's important to I think it's important to kind of um to go and also it's like a one night sort of thing and also maybe you get to hang out with all your high school friends and get like stupid drunk like you used to in like basements and stuff so I say go plus Jack says go so ready set go uh I don't

even know why I'm in like a terrible dad joke mood but yeah I think you should go young ma'am or sir because 10 years post high school that's quite an achievement you did not end up in jail or anything else like that so you're definitely beating at least some people so i say go okay guys thank you so much for listening to this episode it's over if you guys enjoyed it we would very much so love if you leave a review on the apple podcast app it would be amazing big fan big fan and um if you want to follow me on my socials they are always listed in the description of all this kind of stuff all of those things and if you guys have listened to any of these calls and you're like, Hey, I have some input on this. Or if you are a

previous caller, either from this episode or another episode, and you want to give us a follow up on any of the advice I gave you, I would love, love, love that. Um, and then also again, if you've got more, if you heard these and they sparked any sort of like, Oh, I've got something in my life that I would like Megan's wonderful, amazing advice on. You can leave a voicemail at 310-694-0976. again you can leave some response you can leave a follow-up or just a whole other story of your life just not i mean like not the whole story of your life i mean like if you need advice on something you can call us and leave a voicemail at 310-694-0976 and thanks guys for listening we will see you what about international oh shit yeah my i didn't forget about i did forget about

you international college but now i'm not forgetting about you you guys can record an mp3 like an audio file the so-called mp3 everyone remember limewire legally downloading it's like cool i'm familiar with mp3s you guys can record an mp3 on your phone or whatever sort of recording device you have not a recorder i don't want to hear your wind instrument um yeah you guys can make a audio recording and then email it to meganpodcast at gmail.com and it would be great if you just keep it under three minutes which is the same thing and all the sort of um suggested things that we say for the regular voicemails or be as as explicit or not explicit i guess explicit be as detailed as you can with like what you need advice on mostly

because that helps me give you the best advice you could even hear in this in this where i'm like oh what a family event or how old are you how long you've been dating that kind of stuff really helps me cater to give you the best advice possible so yeah if you guys want to email your mp3 files of your question stuffs to meganpodcasts at gmail.com we love international listeners not more than we love our domestic i was like in national but we do love this canadians and we would love for you to give a citizenship to where you live because here's orange and bleak okay well guys i will see you or hear you you'll see me on the internet but you will hear me in your ears in two weeks until then don't mess up your lives or just enough that you can call for more advice and then I can

fix it bye don't blame me is a production by me produced and directed by Jack Ferry associate producer Melissa DeMonts edited by Melissa DeMonts post-production sound by Chris Henry and music by Giacomo Picasso and Ryan Hunter I will see you guys in two weeks and don't blame me if your life bursts into flames before then Your playlist might get you through the workday, but have you ever wondered how your ancestors spent theirs? What work helped them build a life? How did they adapt as the world around them changed?

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