Don't Blame Me! - S2E19: Guest: Lily Marston - Hiding A Secret Boyfriend

Episode Date: September 14, 2018

You guys asked for her, so Lily Marston is back and we’re here sharing our advice! We’re answering your questions on what to do if you’ve been lying to your family for years about your boyfriend, dealing with your brother and bestfriend potentially boning, and there’s even talk of an excellent penis. We also have a call back from the caller who’s boyfriend had a child appear in their life.Follow Us!@meghanrienks@lily_marston@sheisnotmelissaNeed Advice?www.dontblameme.showDomestic Listeners Call: [phone]International Listeners Send a Voice Memo To: [e-mail]… with as much detail as possible under 3 minutes! I’ll do my best to share my wonderful words of wisdom. If you’re under 18, please get your parent’s permission. Advice is for entertainment purposes only, so you can’t blame me if I screw up your life. I kid! My advice IS AMAZING.- Want to WATCH this episode as well? Check out my YouTube channel:http://youtube.com/meghanrienksSupport the show: https://www.patreon.com/join/dontblameme See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello everybody on this episode of Don't Blame Me we have your most requested guest Lily Marston and we talk about a girl whose brother is now dating her friend. Very much a Harry Ginny situation and we also talk about a girl whose new friend is being a little weird and texting her mom about asking where she is her whereabouts. What's happening? We don't know. We're gonna find out. This episode of Don't Blame Me is brought to you by Casper, a sleep brand that continues to revolutionize its line of products to create an exceptionally comfortable sleep experience one night at a time. Get $50 off select mattresses by visiting casper.com slash blame and using promo code blame at checkout thanks to audible for supporting don't blame me for a free audiobook

with a 30-day free trial go to audible.com slash blame or text blame to 500 500 hello everybody and welcome back to another episode of don't blame me today we have the internet's queen everybody's favorite person in the world where are you getting these from the comments and beauty break yeah you're the most liked person you're very requested on this show too you are no you are everyone wants a video they're like now that you have video we need lily back which well thank you guys also i'm gonna just nice to be wanted i'm gonna keep having you back because i'm like i just want to rotate my friends and i am you're talking it's nice to i feel like we have to schedule work things to be able to hang out well that's because we just

both get tired and don't want to leave our houses yeah it's a story of my life of being like that's i don't want to drive i'm like i want to hang out with someone but then that requires moving and not being horizontal exactly and i and i don't leave i make people come to me i know and same and yeah and that's the issue with us it's usually it's easy with asin because asin's like i'll be right over i'm like great because i'm not leaving it was better when i used to edit all of your videos and i was like i had i don't really have time okay it was like we had to okay well guys um this is don't blame me it's an advice podcast uh if you're watching this on youtube say hello to lily's sexy outfit and potential underboob no you don't have any

but i mean like it's questionable it's like not revealing uh and then if you are watching this you can also uh click the down bar to see where you can or here you can see it and then you can find out where to hear the podcast i don't know i don't know i'm getting to you melissa's pointing to herself including waiting hello me i'm here and melissa's here and your title today is queen queen i got a throne your big ass throne it looks good i feel like your hair is kind of like a crown as well is it yeah it looks great crowning glory oh hell yeah uh so guys yeah this is an advice podcasts which i've said multiple fucking times if you guys need some help in your life and you want us to give you advice give us a call at 310-694-0976 and to all of our international

listeners email an audio file to meganpodcasts at gmail.com and uh we're about to dive in and give you some truth bombs i was gonna try and sing that dive in song that people always sing when they're talking about dms but then i remember slide into the dms it's like i'm about to dive then but i'm not never mind i don't know either well i'm not gonna say it because i knew that it wasn't gonna sound like that but you know more pop culture references than me i'm just gonna stop talking well guys let's hop into the episode hi megan i'm 17 and this past summer i've been getting really close with this friend i consider her my best friend now and her and my mom um exchanged phone numbers a few weeks ago but if i don't answer my phone or answer her text or her

calls or anything or her snapchats or anything like that she will call my mom asking where i am if i'm home what i'm doing and she'll also text my mom repeatedly and even call her repeatedly when my mom's at work so me and my mom are also trying to move out of our house right now because of her of my stepdad but that's a whole different story but this friend will actually without my mom even asking or anything like we're both 17 and this girl will actually call houses that she sees for rent and for sale and she'll get information about them and she'll call my mom and she'll tell my mom about them like what their requirements are and everything and she just like she just does kind of stuff like that like over pushing her boundaries and so how do I tell her

to not really push her boundaries anymore and like she can't repeatedly text my mom asking where I am and she can't really call houses for sale you know what I mean so I have some thoughts I think the first one is concern concern i wonder if this is because they're new friends so i say like overall i say be transparent and say that it's odd or not say that's odd talk to your mom make your mom do it i literally that's me i'm like well if she's texting the mom that like she's already talked to her all my best friend's mom but like i'll text sydney's mom but it's not weird like she's in my phone as like mama cohen well a very different scenario yeah no exactly oldest best friend but also granted if she didn't text me back in high

school i would have just like called her sister and been like him coming over yeah because that's i think also the difference is like what is their relationship and how new because like if it was like your best friend and they weren't answering and you like thought they were just like not answering i would just like show up at their house but yeah the fact that she's calling in and saying that she feels weird about it means that like this is out of character or this is like a new friend and you're like, oh, I don't like this.

Would you have every right to feel odd about it? I would say maybe she wants a family. Yeah, no, I think definitely it sounds like the other girl has some insecurities or issues that she's dealing with and maybe she's like trying to kind of like create a home life that she can. And maybe she sees like,

maybe she just really likes you and your mom and your relationship and maybe she very much wants to have like a family like that or also maybe she has like a shitty stepdad and she kind of sympathizes and she's just not she it's just coming across in like a really like weird yeah in that um but also maybe it is a weird obsessive thing and you're the only one who can know that so i think if you tell your mom i feel like it's it's totally a cop-out to have the mom do it but at the same time i mean she included the mom it's like well now the mom's part of it so i feel like also it you could maybe get the message across less harsh

yeah with the mom than being like hey like you're fucking weird stop texting my mom all the time and have the mom be like hey sweetie like it's actually uh like i'm at work i can't talk and like we have a realtor but i really appreciate you trying to help yeah but like we don't need yeah i don't know i feel like moms can like phrase things so it's not as offensive as like you just kind of being like totally because you're like you're an adult you know more than me like i believe you even though like plot twist like no one knows anything no one knows shit um and then for like the whole if you i think after that you should see how she responds to it because maybe maybe she doesn't you know i mean like maybe she's got great intentions but she just starts showing

up and she knows yeah but then if she starts doing that then you can kind of be like okay i don't really want to hang out with this girl anymore also you don't even if she's having whatever this is gonna sound controversial even if she's having like a we've we've talked about this a lot even if she's having like a rough home life if she's making you feel uncomfortable or you're not but you you don't feel beneficial you're not benefiting from this friendship i think it's worse to be pity friends with someone than it is to like not cut them out of your life but kind of like back away so then they can find somebody who's going to be a real friend to them not someone who feels obligated to because no matter what's happening in your home life someone else's

home life and all of those things i think in order to care for that person the best thing to do is to i think you should always cut people slack obvious obviously and give them second chances but then also i think how people become better people despite like hardships and stuff is like when people are like oh no everyone goes through that kind of stuff like face that thing well then i was just thinking like what if you like had your friend that you would call when like something goes wrong and they just like didn't care yeah i'm like so not to say this girl doesn't care because I feel like clearly she does if she's seeking advice on like how to fix the situation but like yeah you don't really want to spend a lot of time letting someone else invest in your

friendship if you're like have one foot out the door it's not fair to either of you like it's wasting your time and it's also preventing her from finding another friend who could be that really great friend to her but also this might just be like a miscommunication and like she's never she maybe she's an alien maybe she's never like had a human friend before I was just gonna say i'd also be curious if um maybe she has any other friends that you could like compare notes and be like is she doing this to you too has she done this yeah especially if it's a new friend and you don't like kind of feeling it out yeah or maybe she's an alien like kyle looks fine she has no belly button i'm an alien but i don't like like people so yeah it's much more normal

i think we did it yeah i don't i'm sorry that sounds very uncomfortable i'm also curious what happens yeah so let us know okay on to the next so i am 23 years old and i have a little bit of a dilemma and i would like your opinion on if i'm overreacting or if i should just leave it um so my brother is two years older than me and him and my best friend have been talking for a while like they text and I know that they've like hung out a couple times um and last night he actually went and stayed at her house and I have let them know before that it just makes me really like uncomfortable like it's just kind of weird to me because I would never do anything with my friend's brother or I would never do anything with my brother's friend just

because I feel like it's just kind of weird and crossing a line um and I feel really uncomfortable about it because I don't really have many friends like she's kind of my only friend and um I don't know it just makes me feel kind of weird so I kind of talked to them about it and I told them how it just weird that they're hanging out and I'm pretty sure that they probably have slept together even though they said that they haven't and I would just like your opinion on if you think I'm overreacting obviously they're both adults so they can live their lives however they'd like but I guess it's just kind of annoying how my feelings weren't really put into consideration on how it would make me feel weird lily's dying okay something i have such a good example because

it's literally like this to a t actually even similar ages my old roommate in college her brother is a year older and we he would visit all the time we'd all hang out i actually made out with him a couple times she never cared she was like encouraging that but um he would visit and his friends would visit and since they're a year apart like and she's a twin so like the three of them always hung out and had very similar friends and also like drink a lot of alcohol so they all and especially their friend group very incestuous but she started one night they were drunk at a party and she hooked up with one of the brother's friends and it was like oh my in the morning it was like oh my god it's so funny like can't believe you made out like played it off as

if it wasn't a big deal and then they like made out again a week later and then they kept hanging out and then the brother freaked out and was like so not okay with it and was like mad at both of them yeah and like screaming at his sister for like how could you sleep with my friend um and it's like literally one of his like five like best best friends and he really like resented it and like wouldn't let it happen for so long but like at the end of the day you can't really tell someone not to like someone you can tell them not to be together but then they're just gonna resent you more or they're just gonna do it behind your back which is exactly what my friend did and it was for like a while I think and the brother would always like suspect but they'd like

they'd deny it yeah and then it would be like even when they were hanging out like all together like he would try and like call them out and they'd be like no like we're totally just friends eventually they like had a huge blowout everyone got in a huge fight but then he did like kind of finally was like okay like if you really care about each other and they dated for a while like at least six months or something like it wasn't just like a fling yeah because they really did like each other and she's like well it sucks because like why should i give up something that could be really great just because it makes my brother a little uncomfortable for right now even though he would definitely like get used to it later yeah so they ended up breaking up and now

that guy's married and the brother's married and relationship but like wow it was very much like over the course of probably a year and a half and it was when I lived with her and it was like very dramatic but had he kind of just been more understanding up yeah then they wouldn't like they wouldn't the only solution on her end is like then they never would have found out yeah it could have been something and then she would have regarded it forever anyway yeah so I would say that you're not overreacting and also that definitely it wasn't like during that whole time even when she was my friend was talking about the brother's friend they were like still felt so guilty and it was always like a point of conversation that they were talking yeah so to

say that she like didn't consider your feelings probably isn't true she probably she's like literally probably freaking out all the time and like feels guilty but then like doesn't know because she's like balancing both of them so I think it's just a tough situation to be in I'd also say if she's you're saying that she's like your best friend and one of your only friends I guarantee you this is something that like she's probably been feeling towards him for so long that she's tried to squash and like she probably feels so guilty and like she doesn't want to feel those feelings for him more than you don't want her to exactly because like that it's it's jeopardizing a friendship in her eyes like if you're not supportive of it it's jeopardizing a friendship

for a relationship in your 20s which might not go anywhere so it's like she could lose both of you if she goes through with all of this so I would say the considering if she's willing to even do that then that means she must like him quite a bit and also the same thing with your brother like I wouldn't I would say like that is if he just wanted to hook up with her and she just wanted to hook up with him and it wasn't like a feelings thing they probably would have just done that and even if it was that you're I'm sure your brother wouldn't want to put you in that kind of position because like that's awkward and like isn't fun I would also say I do feel like it's a little different for girls in the situation just because guys this is okay stereotypical but a lot

of a lot of my guy friends don't talk to their other guy friends about like their girlfriends that's like not really like we'll talk about like i mean they'll talk to me about their girlfriends but they don't really talk like guy to guy about that and even mott says that he's like no like i'm more likely to talk to like a girl about another girl than i am with like guys but girls i find i'm more likely to talk to my girlfriends about relationship stuff than i am really with my guy friends like i'll talk to my guy friends more with like about sexual stuff but like if it's like really it's literally me all me tyler and leo um you'll talk to my literally no we'll talk about everything though but i think like that might feel you might feel

like oh we usually talk about our crushes and now we don't get to because like it's about my brother and so you feel like it's kind of limiting the things you can talk about but i would say if you maybe can hang out with them one time and just see it and then also like have like a serious talk with your friend about like i think if you can tell her like if this is something really serious between you guys and you guys really like have feelings for each other i'm not gonna lie it feels really weird and if you haven't seen my movie yet it happens in my movie the honor list watch it stream it buy the dvd um but if you can tell her like it makes me feel like odd but i obviously i love and care about you both so much that i want you both to be happy and so i just

really want to let you know that like for me i'm just my fear in this is if you guys break up are we going to still be able to be friends because like that's my brother and like i'm he's always going to be in my life or also like am i going to lose you like am i not going to see you hang out with you a lot like maybe she's one of those girls that hangs out with her boyfriend when she's dating someone hangs with her boyfriend all the time it's like i don't want to lose i'm afraid that if it works i'm going to lose you and if it doesn't work i'm going to lose you and if you can tell her that because i think there might be a part of her the reason why they're not talking to you about it is because like they don't think you feel comfortable talking about it and i think

as soon as you kind of set the boundaries they're just like waiting for your cue I would probably say because it is they're considering your feelings and I think they're just misreading that and then not talking to you about it when I think it sounds like you want to have a conversation so I think you need to kind of say that and it's you're not being unreasonable I think it's not uncomfortable situation regardless um but I also think if I mean 23 is pretty young still but at the same time i'm like i'm 28 and i'm like i don't meet that many people that i like really like i've been dating since i was 22 i'm like to like if you had the opportunity like if this girl that if your friend is like literally like dating different guys like every weekend always has

boyfriend is like a serial dater maybe the situation's a little different but it's like if this is someone she actually likes and like is willing to like make it uncomfortable with her best friend for it like don't you really want to like yeah also give her the benefit of the doubt and be like hey like if this is something you really think is and then if they get married she could be your sister exactly me and sydney always said we always wish she had a brother granted he'd be so short we probably never date but her parents were always like we wish we had a son that megan could just date and i could get married too but they like moths but um they do and i think also you need to consider their feelings just as much as you think that they're

not considering yours yeah also i think you've got some homework watch 17 again apparently the kissing booth why is it again why am i hayley steinfeld her best friend starts dating her brother yeah i was gonna say 17 again is zach efron yeah and i'm like i don't think there's yes that is accurate i want to watch that it's a good movie um yeah and then watch the honor list so you've got some homework and maybe just talk to your friend and your brother watch my movie okay let's go on to the next i am 20 years old and i'm dating this guy we've been dating for about four months now things are going great um we just spent the weekend with my sister and her family he's amazing he has a fantastic penis everything's great but um we started dating

relatively soon after I broke up with my ex and he my ex kind of completely destroyed me as a human being and I was left in this puddle of just tears for a solid two months and I was just talking to my sister every night crying and it was terrible and I learned a lot from that relationship and how shitty of a situation it was but I don't know how to separate my ex from my current relationship and I don't want my ex to have the power over my current relationship to completely fuck it up because so far it's going really great but sometimes I have to stop myself from punishing my boyfriend for things that my ex did and being paranoid with him about things that my ex did. And I don't think that's fair. But at the same time, I feel like I did grow

so much from my relationship with my ex. And so I want to continue to learn from that relationship and just use all the shitty mistakes that I made in that relationship so it doesn't happen again. But I also don't want to punish my boyfriend who has done nothing wrong for a relationship that he had no part of. And I don't know how to do that. I don't know what that balance is and so I'm just constantly fighting with myself to not be crazy with my current boyfriend I don't want to say you already fucked up but I think this like you're gonna have to go about this in a different way because you hopped into a relationship really quickly after because I would say my boyfriend before Mott's will not say his name yeah um really fucked me

up for like a long time to the point where I was like, I'm going to wait. Granted. Yeah. Like so bad. So I was like, I waited like a full year. I got with someone for a week and I'm like, okay, six month break. Yeah. But like I waited a full year before I started dating again, because in that relationship, ever since I was not to make this all about me, but ever since I started dating it, like seriously dating, like including sex and stuff at like 16 ish. And so I didn't, I like consistently had a guy from the time that I was 16 through 21 and by, and like each guy progressively just got worse and worse and worse and worse. And so by the time that I was 21 and I was dating this guy, I was like, yeah, 2021. And I was dating this guy. Yeah. Yeah. Um, I was

just, he was just awful. Like it was terrible. And it was a really, really, really bad relationship. And from there, I took some of the blame of being like, yes, these are, I'm not the one who's making these relationships bad. Like I'm dating these bad guys, but like my picker's off right now because like I'm just accepting shitty behavior because I've gotten so used to that, that I gave myself a year to be like, I need to like wipe this clean. I need to figure out what I want and I need to not just try and seek, I don't know, seek like relationships is like validation and that's what i was doing so much was that like i was just

looking for relationships and i wasn't i just my picker was off and so i took a year break before i started dating anyone else and that's when i started dating mots after that um who you didn't even seek out who i didn't but i had a crush on him forever um but i would say going into a relationship two months after one that like really wrecked you is hard i think you need to have an honest conversation with your boyfriend and be like hey I'm coming into this with I hate the term baggage but you're like I'm coming into this with a lot of uh like things that just like trigger me like things that make me like associate with a previous relationship and I need to learn you and know you and learn that the things that you might say and do aren't going to lead to the

same things that your ex did but I think you need to include him in the conversation because otherwise he's going to be able to tell you if you're being crazy too like he's going to be able to say oh no you're reading too much into this but if you don't tell him those things he's just going to think you're constantly reading too much yeah and you're battling all this stuff in your head and you're and right now no offense i think like your gauge of what's you're you're going to be like sensitive to some things that somebody else might not think about at all because you have like previous issues with that stuff and so i think until you include him in on that he's not going to know and also if you include a man on it and he's a good guy he'll be understanding yeah

and he's going to be able to be like oh no i totally understand these are the things that make you feel a certain way and also that applies to like relationships or applies to like family like if there are just like certain like some people have abandonment issues like there are me there are like certain things that if you can like let your partner in on it's not asking them to change something drastic about their personality but it's like oh maybe it's the way i say something or the way i ask you to do something that like i wouldn't think that this means something but like for you it brings up something from your past that reminds you of that well and even I think she said they've been dating four months yeah like that's a pretty decent amount of time

to get to know someone so I feel like if you've exhibited crazy you probably already have so I would say it doesn't even have to be like every time he does something that maybe reminds you of something your ex did don't look at it like that but maybe just have a general conversation with him I would say up front but a little after the fact yeah but and just be like hey um I know that sometimes I might come across as being and then I don't know what exactly the craziness is manifesting in if it's like you're getting mad because he's not texting you back or if he's like hanging out with other girls or something but that just be like hey just so you know like this is where that's coming from and I'm working on it but like I need you to know that I am working on it

so like you don't think that I'm just yeah yeah and I'd also say the when you you don't have to it's not the you don't have to choose between being crazy or being gullible in a doormat and also i feel like being crazy is an annoying term anyway because i was like crazy to who and also like got did he not text you back for two days and then you got mad because i don't think that's crazy no and also let's talk about the origin of your crazy you're saying that you're being crazy because your last boyfriend made you crazy so ultimately this all leads back to boys making girls crazy and then calling girls crazy i think it's okay if you're not you can be over him and know he's a total scumbag but you can still be really hurt and affected by that and be not ready

to get they bring everything that you usually can bring to a relationship well and then especially if it didn't end like on your terms then and you're like still kind of seeking closure even though you are with someone already new then it's like are you one waiting for the other shoe to drop so it's like when is this relationship gonna end or are you trying to like kind of outdo the last relationship and try and be like well this is gonna be better and then like you're just too in your head about it and you need to actually be like enjoying the time together because that's the whole point of being in a relationship but you just have to be you just got to focus on what makes you happy right now and like what's going to make the best because if you're feeling crazy

in this relationship if you're single you might be sad but you're not going to sabotage another relationship by bringing the shit that you dealt with in the last one into this one and if he's a really great guy too I think have end advice would be have that conversation with him tell like tell him like this is what's been going on in your head and include him in on that because also it's not like you're like hey I'm still in love with my ex-boyfriend I want to go back to him it's like hey I'm just like really struggling and I recognize what I've been doing it might have come across as a certain thing so say that gauge his reaction and also not to be an asshole but like he also might not end up being like the greatest guy ever like it might not be like the perfect guy

ever but like everyone comes into your life for like i was gonna say there's relationships all exist for different reasons so one might be in our lifetime oh my god pinterest no literally though listen to like your gut instincts because no matter what no matter how like crazy you think you are i think like everybody's gut is like always right and then follow what's going to make you the happiest in a year from now and i think just like if he's doing something that you in any way can like take a step back and trace it back to like i'm actually upset because i used to do this yeah if you have to say that then that's a concern like yeah then we need to totally totally the only person that you're benefiting or not benefiting in a

relationship is you and the other person exactly like if you're not really enjoying it and living your best life and exactly yeah yeah okay best of luck okay guys we're gonna go on a quick break and this time we're actually going to utilize the break i mean you're going to utilize it because you're going to listen to some fantastic ad reads done by me hell yeah and i in real time i'm gonna go pee this episode of don't blame me is brought to you by casper casper is a sleep brand that continues to revolutionize its line of products to create an exceptionally comfortable sleep experience one night at a time guys we all need mattresses and guess who these mattresses are designed for me humans bye then not me humans no she's an alien so if you are an alien this

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blame and using promo code blame at checkout terms and conditions apply and that's 50 50 buck a ruse guys towards select mattresses by visiting casper.com slash blame and using promo code blame at checkout okay guys today's episode is brought to you by audible and um if you have watched my youtube videos for a good amount of time you might know that i'm a huge fan of audible as somebody with uh adhd it can be really hard to read a book and uh sit down and find that time but um i love cleaning my apartment driving in my car and listening and if you're listening to like the podcast guys you know you like to listen to things already so why not listen to a book and audiobooks are fantastic they are so great for you to learn how to do new things they can

be self-help books fiction non-fiction anything like that and audible is offering a free audiobook with a 30-day free trial for you guys because they're awesome so if you want to listen to it I can promise you it's probably on audible just go to audible.com slash blame or text blame to 500 500 and browse their unmatched selection of audio content download a title for free and start listening it's easy peasy lemon finish it squeezy there we go oh i like that okay so if you guys are still lucky enough to be on summer vacation or if you're like me or an unemployed actor and summer vacation is forever except not the fun kind audiobooks are a great sidekick for your summer activities like hiking going to the beach running i don't really participate in running going on a

road trip downtime outdoors or again if you're me laying in bed with the air conditioning on high audible has the largest selection of audiobooks on the planet can't promise that mars doesn't have more but i mean we don't know about can aliens read i bet aliens can read yeah i can read true and she is an alien everybody uh so i uh just finished listening to the bachelor nation book by amy kaufman so um if you guys are a fan of the bachelor franchise this book was very interesting um i have only recently gotten into the bachelor but this book is written by someone who has been close times to bachelor nation she was a reporter and i mean she's still technically a reporter um and basically dives deep into like behind the scenes secrets of like how everything

works so if you're a nosy person and you like want to stalk things i feel like you would really like it i was very very into it i just uh finished listening to it on uh the airplane i was on and there were definitely a couple of girls going when i was going through airport tsa who saw it on my phone and they were like oh yeah definitely other fans of bachelor nation so uh i actually need a new book to listen to now guys so i finished that one and i also just listened to the last mrs parish so i'm in the mood for some crime so if you guys can suggest some other titles to me uh please let me know and if you haven't listened to the bachelor book what are you doing uh you can listen to it on audible one of my favorite things about audible is it lets you listen to your books

on multiple devices so if you want to listen or like me like i if i'm on the plane i'm probably listening to it on my ipad because then i'm also like you know like playing some games on my ipad at the same time but then if i'm walking around i'm listening to it on my phone and then i can listen to it on my phone when i go home and then i can play on my amazon echo so it'll it'll sync up all there so you don't have to like go through and figure out what spot you're at it syncs the entire time which is great saves you time which clearly I like saving time so guys like I said audible is being amazing and giving you guys a free audiobook with a 30-day free trial at audible.com slash blame or you can text blame to 500 500 that's a u d i b l e dot com slash blame or text

blame to 500 500 get you some books make you real smart make you real intelligent and have conversations with people about things even if it's the bachelor harmony that was fantastic fifth harmony who kidding guys i love them okay everybody we're back from our break i've got big dick energy i've got medium dick energy melissa made me move it's like fourth time she said that well i do i just want everyone to know that i have big dick energy okay so we're gonna hop back into the calls hi megan i love listening to your podcast so i'm 22 and while my boyfriend is the same age as i am he is a year behind me in school we had met before at college but we really

started talking after we matched on tinder this past april and we quickly started spending lots of time together and our feelings got very real and very serious really quickly but maybe was just going to be a short fling the last uh my last month in college ended up with us both falling in love with each other my boyfriend's a great communicator he's great at showing me how much he cares for me and how much he loves me and he's someone I can see in my future but in June I graduated and in July I moved across the country for graduate school while my boyfriend still has one more year at college. I love him and I see a future with him but I also want what's best for him. He's talked about moving to where I live after finding after graduating and finding work

here but I'm uneasy with him making plans when we've only been dating for three months and we're just about to start our long distance relationship. He's really the best partner I've ever had. He checks all my boxes but I'm also not looking to get engaged or married anytime soon and I've always told myself that I would never move or change my life or my future for someone unless I was sure that they were right for me in the long term and because of this while I'd be so excited and happy for my boyfriend to move here in a year i'm worried that that this could change what what he wants in his life um what his future might be what his career um goals are and if things weren't to work out between us i i would feel quite bad so i'm interested in your thoughts and any advice

you might have well she's contradicting herself i know i was like i can't tell what to think about that because on one hand i'm like oh you sound so sweet because it sounds like she's like oh i really care about him and i don't want to like see a future with him but but also that she like doesn't want to like interfere with what his future could be but also i'm just like is that an excuse because you're just like nervous because he's the one that wants to move yeah so he's not asking you to move yeah my thing is is I think uh you you said in the call that you see a future with him and then you also said that you wouldn't move with someone that you weren't positive you could see a future with and so for me I think this is kind of one of those cases of a really

great relationship that like you really really like you love him and he's great and there's nothing wrong and like you're talking he's a great communicator like you really love all of these things about him and it's great but it just might not be it and you don't want you know i mean like there's like you can have a great relationship and there can be nothing inherently wrong with it and you can want to stay together but then also be like but i don't necessarily see us spending the rest of our lives together and i think like the i don't know i think if you like so let me just to put this in like what i oh i'm gonna burp if you have anything to say say it now oh my god um i would say oh my god are you like what did you carbonated okay i'm back

though or do you want to keep going well i was just gonna say that it could be that she does see a future with him but like three months is like real quick so maybe it's just like she sees a future with him but like a year in her head what she meant by like moving or like changing her life would be like someone that i've been dating for years that i know i'm about to get married to yeah she's like obviously i think she seems like very into this but like for it's three months like yeah like a future for that also if like he's moving in a year like a year's a long time like so he doesn't first of all maybe we didn't have to like bring that up exactly he doesn't have to plan that he's like we can move on his part uh but i like yeah like maybe that's

like an idea that you're throwing out there but you like say that like i don't want either of us to like i don't know well i think we talk about on the podcast a lot of like long distance only really works if there's an end game so maybe maybe you implore that advice but maybe maybe that's kind of it is that to try and make your make it seem like the year is going to like the distance is the long distance is worthwhile is because he's saying like well i'm gonna move there so there's an end thing what i would say is i think it's really hard to make that decision at that early on in a relationship because no matter how much you like somebody there is the logic sense of your brain that is like this has only been this amount of time like I can feel all

of these feelings but I don't know how I'm gonna feel in that time but I would also say if there's a gut part of you that's that's saying like I don't want I don't know if there's a there's a difference I think between like the gut part of you who's like oh I don't want to like ruin his life and then the part of you that is like i know deep down as much as i really like him he's not it you i you have to yeah if the concern is that you don't want to ruin his life because like you deep down are you're not totally sure so you don't want him to commit and be sure and then have him get there and be like never mind go away and then like have his whole life be off track because he moved there for you i guess another question would be like where did she say where they lived

no that like if it was somewhere like la or new york like where maybe he was like potentially going to move there anyway if it was like he had career opportunities that he would pursue there anyway yeah and you can maybe just align kind of plans but like if he's literally like moving across the country to something like wyoming yeah well i mean i don't know or it could even be like new york and then it's just you never were planning on it be like well now i am yeah i get that and i also get like not wanting to put all the eggs in one basket because you don't want to let someone else down yeah i would say first of all just don't just say like i would say to him it's not a decision to make it yeah just be like i like i really love you and i really care about

you and i really think we should like i want to make sure that neither of us are committing to something that like a year from now, I don't want you to have to rule out jobs post-grad because of this. Like, I think we should like, I really, this doesn't mean I don't want to be with you and I don't want you to move here, but I also, I want to keep the options open. Cause like, what if you end up getting a new job that moves somewhere else? I was just going to say, or what if like, if she was down to like move to another place for him, if he got a cool job, if like in a year, the relationship was much more like much further along that you were willing to make that kind of decision yeah so I would say assure him that you not wanting to agree to that isn't that

you don't think that you don't want to be together after a year but just about how you don't know where you're going to end up and you don't want you don't want either of you to be making decisions based on like a year in advance based on the other person it's putting unfair expectations on the relationship when it has like your job I mean like in everything else in that city like you're you're you're planning for something that's a year in the future where there are all these other factors that could influence that which not to mention graduating from college is like the scariest time ever because you're like wait what do you mean that i like have to be a real adult now when like everyone is like go to college and then your life will be great

and then all of a sudden you're like wait they lied yeah he might need to move home to like save money and like that his like the idea that he's gonna move somewhere and find a job post-grad that's hard to do. It's hard to find a job. There's a lot of personal factors at play as well. So like throwing in a new relationship where then you're suddenly like committing to something really far in advance

just feels like setting you both up for a mindfuck. But I think that even if you wanted to set a time to be like, hey, like I think that this is going great and I think we should keep doing long distance, but like maybe we push the move-in conversation to a little closer when it actually makes sense yeah and you can even say like i think we should wait and like play it based on the fact that you've already graduated and been like so i felt like i started like really like looking for jobs and things i was going to do post-grad around like

whatever month this is so i think that we should wait until then so you could like so you have had those conversations with employers and all of those things so then we can really plan for something that is closer in the future as opposed to planning for something that maybe we're going to waste all this time planning and like you get an amazing job offer somewhere else and like maybe i want to move there the only alternative would be if this phone call was actually your way of like putting it out there that maybe you aren't yeah as into the relationship but you kind of were looking for someone else to like give you the okay to not be yeah you did mention like he checks all the boxes and he's like really good at communicating i'm like those are all things that

like so on paper he's great exactly but is he missing that thing that you would like yes move across the country because i would also not not to bring this to me but like moths and i have had this conversation where if like i booked a job in vancouver like i played i love the what if game and he fucking hates it and i'm like what if i booked it like i could love auditions all the time or like callbacks for things that shoot in vancouver and i'm like what would you do if i like booked a job in vancouver and he'd be like well depends on how long you're there for if you're longer if you're there for longer than six months and it's like a series like i'd move and that is like without it isn't like a question kind of a thing and that's the same thing i feel about like his

job like if he got something that was in new york i mean granted the only place other place i'd probably fucking move is new york just because like my like i wouldn't be able to do my job anywhere else but that for us isn't that's just like an automatic thing but how long have you guys been together now exactly so i'm like you don't have three months in if i got a job in fucking canada he would not have moved to canada because that's not a normal thing to do no and it's also even to say in a year that you would do it like that's just really over committing to something that you're not really sure what it is yet so i think that especially if you're like like you and mots like we lived here i was like you couldn't imagine your life without him so

it's like he's like yeah obviously i'd move yeah three months like you can still imagine your life without them and you're like still on your best behavior and stuff too i feel like and you can still be told and I wish I wish I could like I feel like I say this all the time but I feel like it doesn't get through like you can love somebody and be in a great relationship with them and it can be amazing and they can check all of your boxes and they can also still not be the person you're gonna end up with and that's fine like it's not you being picky it's not just like it's not it's not and it's not like oh I'm never gonna find this person that has everything that I ever wanted I don't really believe in like sparks and like like destined to be together but like you can

have great relationships and be they can be amazing and they can also just not be the end game and i think knowing that and knowing that like enjoying this time while it is like while you guys have it together if this isn't who you're going to end up with like enjoy that and then also know as long as he knows everything as long as he knows what you're feeling he he can make his own decisions about moving yeah because you're not moving those are i don't know so we don't know your relationship so it really could go either way either i think push the move talk further down so you can both like not stress about anything or really take a hard look at the relationship and see if it's something that you and a year out that's a lot like things might

just work themselves out exactly okay on to the next so i've been with my boyfriend for four and a half years and we're both 21 now and just graduating our undergrad and we are pursuing grad school after this as well and we'll probably be in school for quite a bit of time we've been together since grade 11 so here's where the issue comes in we're both from extremely religious Muslim families where you're not allowed to have relationships with males or females um so yeah we've been kind of hiding it for the past four years and it was it's been a lot his family knows a bit more because guys are have a little bit more leeway and things like that but females have none at all

so i actually haven't spoken about it so we are considering getting engaged um next year or in the next few months basically but we have to tell our parents first and for him this isn't really an issue because I've met everyone in his family they know we're best friends and that's just how they see me as and his siblings know that we're together but for my family the only time they've heard of him is when they accidentally caught us in grade 12 right before prom and they asked me to break up with him and end that relationship which I clearly didn't so now I've been lacking the nerves to bring it up I'm hoping to bring it up this fall around September or October but it's difficult for me because I'm afraid that if I mention it again

they'll remember him from grade 12 and they'll think I'm a liar and which I have been lying but I don't want anything negative to come out of this and I just don't know how to approach them with this entire story and I know this would have been so much easier for me to do if they hadn't learned about him before because they would be extremely happy they've always said oh we want to we want you to get married young and they really like that and I'll be in school for a while and I really want to settle down with him it's really difficult to live my day-to-day life because I'm with him every day at school around the area and I always have to like sneak around um and I just don't have that type of flexibility in a relationship and it gets me anxious so I was

just wondering if you know how I should like approach my family personally um it's just my mom and dad my siblings don't really care I guess I have a few questions is he open to changing his name literally that was the first thing that pops in my head I was like oh no you don't want to lie anymore yeah i was like why did he just change his name and pretend you guys met literally like just get a new haircut maybe they did they recognize him or do they just know about it um so like what's like why would it be okay if she just met him recently like what is there an age that it's like now that it's appropriate well i that like i will be the first to say that i just i'm not that educated oh i have absolutely no idea yeah i'm not just we're not just super educated on

the uh like specifics of why and i'm not sure if that's like your family thing or if it's like a muslim thing in general if there is an age um so it might even be 18 yeah yeah totally or maybe it is just the fact that like she wasn't allowed to date in high school and they were dating in high school and they caught them and she was said like you have to break up with him um other than that I mean, that's hard. Well, there's only so much you can do. I mean, talking to them and just trying to like really explain it to them. I guess it's hard to give any real insight with that because we don't know your parents.

Yeah. I would say like it's this is the guy that you want to spend the rest of your life with. And I think any sort of like negativity that you might get from your parents is just going to be like a small blip on like the rest of your guys' lives together. And if even if you're you're saying like they like they want you to get married young, they like like love the idea for you. And the only thing that would make them feel not OK is the fact that you got you had said you'd broken up with him when you hadn't. I think that's something that even if they are angry in the moment, they're going to get over. Because like if he's like a great guy and this is what they want for you, just not how they specifically wanted it to go like in their heads. I think you just the more honest you can be now I think is the best because I get the lying thing

I would have totally done that not shaming like shitting on you for doing that because that's exactly what I would have done um but if anything I think it also probably shows your parents how serious you guys are that like you have still been because now it has been years it's not like this was like oh we were hooking up before prom it's like no you clearly very much care about each other. Yeah. And I think also not broaching the subject again with your parents until you're like, we want to get engaged. I think also shows them like, I very much felt really guilty for doing this. And like, I really care about your approval and I really want that. So I think like they're ultimately, I think they're, they're going to want you to be happy. And I think even if they

don't react, they're not like crazy excited right off the bat. And they're like a little bit disappointed and upset i think that's gonna go away and that's i guess like maybe definitely don't like wait to tell them until after you're engaged i think as megan said like approach it as like i really value your opinion and approval and would i have felt so guilty for years and we really want to take the next step in our relationship but we feel like do it first just you don't bring him first right because oh no no yeah yeah yeah yeah so yeah i would yeah to have that conversation with your parents i don't i would say don't unless you unless any of your siblings can be on your side that was going to be my follow-up is that how old are your siblings

and if they had any kind of experience like this like do you know how your parents are going to react from past experiences that you're basing it off of and that's why you're scared or is it kind of like the unknown is even worse yeah or like are your siblings going to be like a good support system who understand and then also if your siblings live at home maybe if you talk to them beforehand so then you have that conversation with your parents and then they can like be on your side they can do the follow-up with them um and then i would say don't i would say let your parents have a reaction and listen to it but then also focus on your happiness because ultimately they want you to be happy and sometimes it just it might manifest itself in a way that they pictured

it and if it's not going the way they pictured it they're not going to think you're going to be happy but you obviously know yourself better than anybody else and don't at all not that i'm saying you're gonna do this but just don't let your boyfriend become a pawn in it like don't like if they like react badly and you're like no let me prove it to you i'm bringing him over like don't do that don't let him walk into that their opinions aren't based on any actual facts about him they don't know him so yeah maybe leave him out and just get them to understand the entire scenario as a whole yeah that you're in love with him yeah and you guys they've been together for so long which especially if that's like also probably i would assume her only boyfriend boyfriend yeah

which like is another big thing to you i know it makes me sad like yeah just be together i love it just don't get petty at any point like don't throw in the fact that his parents are fine with us like because i think yeah then they then they'll be like well yeah why did they know and you didn't tell us because I think not that you can like blame it on your parents but I think if you approach it in a way of being like I really heard what you said the first time and I felt really guilty then they can be like oh wow we didn't know about this because of us like we didn't like we reacted really badly when we found out and yes she betrayed our trust but ultimately like that's also the reason why we haven't gotten to know him because we reacted like this so I think as long as

you come at it but yeah i've come at it from like i'm really sorry but this is how you made me feel then and then also just make it known that like you don't want them missing out on such an important part of your life yeah really crossing my fingers for you totally crossing my fingers no clue no clue my mom would just be like you have a boyfriend so we can't relate but i hope it really goes well yeah me too and congratulations it's really cute you know also that whole secretiveness for that long i know it's commitment that is true love it's i love true love can we come to your wedding i would love to invite us i'm great at weddings oh god i am i don't drink it's true but that doesn't matter okay guys we're now on to producer's corner where melissa

picks what'd you pick what do you think i picked is it a callback fuck yeah what kind of callback um it was from the episode with brie esrick um oh those are juicy ones yeah they were juicy ones um her boyfriend found out that he had had a kid and um they were trying to figure out what they wanted how to go about this so literally so you know this caller um got a girl pregnant when they were like around 17 and he didn't know yeah and the girl thought that her next boyfriend that she had hooked up with him right after him was the father for years and now it comes to find out that he wasn't the father that how did they find out did it go they didn't tell they didn't tell us but i'm sure yeah hi megan i'm calling you back about my boyfriend who had a kid he didn't

know about first of all thank you so much for taking my call and really appreciate it um so i told my boyfriend that i had called you because he loves listening to your podcast too and i had him listen to your guys response to our situation about him having a kid with another woman that he didn't know about for seven years um and he pretty much agreed with like everything you guys had to say um we both got on the same page about like openly communicating our feelings about the situation and wanting just to be like completely transparent with each other about you know how we were dealing with it um so he ended up talking to the mom of the kid and basically she doesn't want him to know the kid or talk to the kid or have any kind of like

relationship with the kid um but she still wants him to pay the child support every month and my boyfriend wants to respect her wishes and like wants to be there for the kid but um Um, she also, like, wants to respect that, like, the mom doesn't want to, like, shell-shock the kid and be like, hey, this isn't your, you, the guy that you thought was your dad, like, isn't your dad, and it's this other man that you've never even met. So, um, he's going to be paying the child support, um, because he knows that that's really the only way he's going to be able to support his son right now. and he said that if when the kid turns 18 if he wants to meet his dad that he'd be more than willing and happy to have to try to have a relationship with him and basically his way of being there for the kid is just to like pay the child support and respect the mom's wishes and the mom wants nothing to do with my boyfriend and she said she doesn't want to tell the kid

um that my boyfriend is his dad until the kid's 18 so i told my boyfriend i'm just going to be there for him and support him and I think it's a good thing that at least he can be there for the kid financially if nothing else and um yeah I think listening to your podcast together with my boyfriend like really helped open up the conversation and make it less weird and like easier to talk about and work through so thank you so much Megan okay I have a I have feelings first of all I have a lot of feelings we've got a lot of feelings um I feel like my feelings are both I think different in both of yours um first of all thank you so much for listening um I find it really cool that she listens with her boyfriend now there's officially two guys I know who listen to the

podcast Mott's is not included because the last time I asked him what episode he loved he goes oh the most recent one was Sasha and I was like okay homie has not listened in a while um it's also Sasha's husband is the other guy who listens Seth Hudson um but okay here's what I would say i think i'm really curious what the mom's relationship like is with the man who she had thought was the baby's dad because i think i understand you know i don't know what i'm saying so here's the thing like if he's if she's if the mom is asking your boyfriend to pay child support but doesn't want the child in the life okay i'm all i understand the fact why she wouldn't want the kid to know at seven this guy who has been your dad if he was still in the picture if he's

not in the picture and doesn't want to be a part of this family which to me when she's asking him your boyfriend to pay child support it means that this guy's not financially contributing to raising this kid and so i understand keeping that from your kid if your kid is having a stable home life with a mom and having a relationship with said dad but if that like that dad who isn't actually that kid's father but who raised him for the first couple years if he's probably on the birth certificate if he was yeah and if he's no longer in the picture or if he's and if he's no longer in the picture and he's not financially contributing or like emotionally helping raising this kid then you're preventing this kid from having a dad who wants to be a dad

because i think but also maybe maybe the maybe fine because i would say also like maybe financially he can't support but at the same time she thought it was it wasn't yeah she she thought it was him to begin with so then when she finds out it's not him now she's looking for money which raising a kid is super fucking expensive i totally get that but i think if someone's going to be financially involved in a kid's life if that kid doesn't have a dad to if financially involved in that kid's life if if that's really going to benefit the kid like if like she's really really struggling to make ends meet and this is something that he would be able to contribute to give a better life for his son then i'm all for that as long as there's like an emotional relationship

with some some man in that guy and the kid so whether or not that's your boyfriend or not but if she's seeking financial support and not emotional support i would say if i was your boyfriend i would talk to if he's listening hi uh talk to the mom and ask what like not be nosy just be like hey i obviously like want like you know i i want an emotional relationship but if it's just being able to like financially help him out like that's really what i want to do but i'm wondering like what's is the other guy in the picture because i don't want my kid to grow up without a dad and if that dad isn't me okay someone else can be his dad but i want him to have a dad well and the fact that this guy finds out after seven years that he has a kid and is

still willing to step it up and like be there but then she like doesn't want to be i do get that it's obviously a huge shell shock for the kid totally but also like seven is young but it's not that young yes i remember i had some weird i had like bad family stuff going on when i was seven i very much remember and yeah it was unfortunate but i was like this is at least the more fortunate side of an unfortunate incident yeah so it's like yeah maybe she didn't know who the dad was and there's some confusion but i'm like if he could have two amazing dads totally right like that's way more than most kids have so i think he'll be more scarred if he finds out when he's 18 that everyone's been lying to him for that long like this you could at least like and i feel like

you're younger you bounce back you bounce back faster you could just be introduced as like a family exactly exactly it was like introduce him at least at first just into the lot like and that's even like the fact that the uh mom is so adamant to not have him in the life at all until he's 18 and also like how do you even then give him the option at 18 because at this point he doesn't know that that's not his dad yeah and also my fear too is that not that i'm saying that that other guy isn't a stand-up guy he might be but his tie to her besides their relationship was this kid and this kid is now not his so the likelihood that like what happens if like that guy gets pissed off one day and tells the kid like i'm not your dad like how fucked is that

to potentially hear that from him as opposed to hearing it from your mom and i think like seven is really young there's like terrible things that happen when you're seven that you remember but there's also a lot of stuff you don't fucking remember at being like seven years old so i think that what you have to do is i think it's her responsibility to also like tell your boyfriend hello sir like find out if this kid has a dad and from there yes and then also i would say be persistent that's like with the mom because i think she probably feels um not to put feelings in her mouth she might feel embarrassed she might feel like a little bit of like slut shaming of being like I didn't know that this I thought this other guy was my kid's

dad this whole time and she might yeah she might feel embarrassed and feel slut shamed but she shouldn't at all and so I think if you can show your support for not only the kid but also for her and be like I'm really sorry I wasn't around and I didn't know if I had known I would have like really wanted to been been a part of the kid's life all of this time i guess that's also another question to bring up is like what is what was their relationship like and how did that end and is she just like kind of almost taking it out on him like if it didn't end well yeah and like not letting him be a part of it because like if he's willing to step it up and then like i don't know i feel like even if he was like maybe financially supported for a while and then like

with the potential that maybe in like in a in six months they could have a conversation again but to like full-on cut it off and be like no you are not seeing him until you like until 10 years from now like no like that's not also not to be a cunt you can take him to her to court for that like ultimately like if you're going to be giving this kid money you have visitation you do and unless there was anything like super dramatic like she can't be and you don't and that's the we don't know her situation like if it's the she desperately needs the money and maybe he the other guys in the picture still as a kid as a dad but he's not they're not able to financially support the kid or maybe they're fine and it would just be nice exactly like so but then I'm like if it

would just be nice then like no you don't get to take the money and then also cut him out I don't know I know it seems like he would he wants to be involved and this and he's settling he's willing to do whatever and then she's just like cutting it off it seems like maybe she needs to give her a little bit of time to like come to terms with what's going on but yeah and be there I play the game a little bit like be there for her too not just for the kid and play into that aspect of being like I'm like I'm so like I'm so impressed with how much you've been raising him like you've done an amazing job and i really i like i don't think that i want to become a part of that i don't want he's there like and like that she's done a great job and that he's not coming in here trying

to like white horse take her take any of the situation or be like bond with the kid more than her and take full visitation and all that stuff in a world where so many kids either don't have parents or have bad parents or just have like not great home lives to deprive a kid of a dad that is very much willing and like wanting to be a part of their life and like you have someone that cares about you and you just don't get to yeah and that's also just going to make him resent his mom when he turns 18 he'll find out eventually yeah so i would say just stick around and be persistent and then if that's she's not being receptive to that just say like well at 18 what he's gonna find out that you've been lying to him all of this time and then is the 18 like

an actual thing that she's suggesting or is it like pushing it off until like everyone kind of like and i would say from until he meets a kidney right until everyone forgets about it oh wait that's not going to happen yes let the kid meet his dad also because she unless we know that she's been struggling financially prior to knowing that this was the dad also why did she just do a paternity test now that's what i was like how do you just find that out seven years in like because that to me sounds like they broke up yeah i mean it could be like maybe they went to the doctor and found out that they weren't the same blood type or something like i feel like there's always weird things that like sometimes people find out that they were adopted for some reason

people find out in weird ways that typically medical but i don't know yeah well that's fuck i wanted another call back i know i was like i just we need more details yeah and good good on you for just being supportive with it which i think was our advice oh yeah i mean at At the end of the day, I was like, there's nothing you can really do except just, like, totally listen. Yeah. In general, I feel like back in the day when, like, parents got divorced, it was like, oh, my gosh. And then, like, if people had two dads or two moms, it was great. Like, things are getting much more progressive.

Yeah, that there are different representations of, like, perfect family. And there's no reason that you can't have multiple parents and everyone have their own role that they play in that scenario. Yeah. well that is our episode thanks Lilz for being on thanks for having me oh I'm gonna burp again oh god

this is why I can't drink carbonated beverages it just like went through something I'm glad we're sitting kind of far apart you're welcome thank you guys so much

for listening or watching this episode if you're listening you can catch it on YouTube and if you're watching on YouTube if you click the down bar

not only can you find our socials on there but you can also find out where you can get the podcast directly to your phone or your ear holes and Lily where can people

find you on the internet um at lily underscore marston um on all the social medias on the social medias um i hope you guys like this episode if you want to call in if you've got some things that you desperately need advice on leave us a voicemail at 310-694-0976 i'm crushing it i know it so well and for our international listeners uh email an audio file to meganpodcast at gmail.com and we'll have lily back on soon okay hell yeah okay oh fuck i keep hitting my teeth it's like are your teeth just big they are they go out this way yes yeah they want to give me jaw surgery we talked about that whatever okay guys um well we'll see you next week goodbye don't blame me it's a production by me produced directed and edited by melissa demont post

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