Don't Blame Me! - S5E1: 100th Episode - Live Calls

Episode Date: December 2, 2019

It’s our 100th Episode, baby!!! We’re doing something special for this one. We’re talking to the callers LIVE on air and sharing advice on carrying emotional baggage into a new relationship, what to do if your high school sweetheart won’t make time for you, dealing with your study buddy who never talks about his girlfriend , and talking to your partner about bad sex. We also have an update from the caller whose dad was sleeping with masseuse. It’s a fun one. Thanks to EVERYONE who has listened over the past 99 episodes. Join our (new) PRIVATE Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/dbmsecretgroup  Follow Us! @meghanrienks www.instagram.com/meghanrienks  @dontblamemepod www.instagram.com/dontblamemepod  @sheisnotmelissa www.instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa   Listen to ad-free on Stitcher Premium! For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code 'BLAME,’ PLUS exclusive bonus episodes. This episode is also brought to you by Hinge. Affordable Therapy By State (Curated by Crissy Milazzo): www.tinyurl.com/y64kwdnf    Need Advice?  www.dontblameme.show  Domestic Listeners Call: [phone]   International Listeners Send a Voice Memo To: [e-mail]  … with as much detail as possible under 3 minutes! I’ll do my best to share my wonderful words of wisdom. If you’re under 18, please get your parent’s permission. Advice is for entertainment purposes only, so you can’t blame me if I screw up your life. I kid! My advice IS AMAZING. - Want to WATCH this episode as well? Check out my YouTube channel:  http://youtube.com/meghanrienks Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/join/dontblameme See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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hello everybody welcome to our 100th episode i'm so excited holy tits i can't believe we've been doing this for 100 episodes i know like what was our first one uh well it was like a little bumpy because it was just you by yourself and so solo yeah it was solo and you um it was just different it was a different vibe but it's fun now there's no video component oh my god wow we've come so far we're so excited um if you guys missed the announcements which means you haven't listened to every single or watched every single episode i even put it up separately in the feed too yeah guys and also put on our instagram we have a special edition of don't blame me today i'm very excited about this yeah so basically we asked you guys to send us like summaries of

what you need advice on and instead of just listening to voicemails we're gonna call you guys and talk to you like i was gonna say face to face computer to computer like face to face yeah face phone face phone computer screen screen to screen and like ask you guys questions all of that kind of stuff i think this is going to be amazing we're really really really excited me too hopefully y'all bitches answer and i love the community that we've cultivated to me too because i'm so excited based on like even just like the summaries from like what these are that i'm like oh wow we're gonna like talk to you literally like face to face about like sex and shit and can ask questions like yeah instead of just being estimating or guessing what actually happened we

can actually ask yeah and i think it's i i hopefully you guys will hear us too because we get so many people who will be like oh i should have taken your advice i didn't actually maybe if we talk out fuck sorry i hit my elbow elbow and face did i hit my face at the same time probably like it but i think if maybe we talk to you face to face you guys will be like you'll you'll it'll we'll have a bit deeper connection like sink in it'll sink in and we know that whatever you're going through is happening right now yeah as opposed to like a week ago or two weeks ago which i also think is super interesting um i guess i should tell you the phone number for upcoming episodes and if you want to call in and leave us a voicemail back to our normal format you

can leave us one at 310-694-0976 and international listeners you can send us an audio message at meganpodcast at gmail.com and we love you guys so much thank you for following us on instagram but please don't dm us your advice we don't answer advice via dm even if you have an accent you think it's going to take too long if you think it's going to take too long write down everything you want to talk about accent we are great we're pretty good with accents like we got this but if you think because if you have an accent that probably means that you're an international caller so just send in what you said like in words and if we can follow along with what you did when you send the voicemail in yeah right yeah just like transcribe everything and then

just read that and then we have both yeah which will be great um also like if it's a medical question ask your doctor don't ask us yeah yeah like we can't we can't help you with that and if it's something that you can google too just google it yeah and a lot of we get a lot of ones of people being like i'm not sure you've answered this in a previous episode you don't have to i mean you should go back and listen to all of our old episodes but a the same way that i could tell you if we talked about an episode is the same way that you could find it because my brain i don't have a catalog i would also have to go look back on all of them so if you even just go on wherever you listen to podcasts you can look at the description and there's a description of pretty

much every call we've covered so you can find that there um but we get good questions via dms so i want you guys to call in and it's a call in advice yeah and as much as you think your friends are going to know it's you voice changer apps we've had people use that it works and also your voice sounds very different and if you don't give any defining like specifics of like where you go to school or anything like that or your friends aren't going to know and just deny deny deny yeah even like one time i called it as a joke and megan didn't know it was me into after the show was over and i told her yeah i'm a dumb bitch yes but i was good at changing my voice yeah but i think you got like i i i don't think that you i think you guys are being a little i don't know some of you

guys can worry a little bit too much yeah and just like lying big that wasn't me your friends ask you about it you know whatever who cares maybe they need to hear it been also something that we're we've done now if we've like we said like i love this community that we've cultivated so we're announcing it right now we have a facebook group where we can it'll be a private facebook group where we can continue to like have these open discussions but you guys can like ask each other questions or if it's something that you immediately need advice on you can ask other people um plus if you don't remember where an episode was maybe somebody else does yeah i think it's gonna be so much fun we love seeing like how not only like we love interacting with you guys

like on comments on youtube and stuff but like we love seeing how you guys interact with each other and i think this is gonna be like a really fun place and also instead of like dming us and being like hey i need advice tonight about this thing like do i go or do i not hey post it on facebook and you'll get so many like literally our whole community can be like let's figure this out yeah so make sure you're following us on facebook we can crowdsource blow job tips we can make a whole we can oh my god yeah that'll be fun we'll make a whole list all together yeah and we'll make it private so you have to have the specific link so you don't have to worry about like yeah people finding it we should we'll do some we should we should ask some questions yeah so then it has to

prove that you guys are fans who are protecting us and protecting you guys so like people can't get in and if you're worried about people finding out like you're in in the group or whatever just make a fake facebook it's so easy melissa has one yeah i don't follow anybody no this is a fake one yep but i think you i'm really excited for this i hope you guys are too um i think it's gonna be like really really fun yeah it's gonna be like lame advice stuff too where like i can be like hey guys what shirt should i wear this one or this one and then you can help me um but i guess without further ado should we get into the let's do it 100 episode call some of y'all bitches you're not bitches we love you you want to go ahead and share whatever story you want to tell

once upon a time things have escalated let me tell you oh god i don't want to say i'm excited because it's like your life but like i'm a little like i'm just excited to hear basically i wrote everything down so that i wouldn't forget great love it met cute boy in my orgo class and i was like this is great i'm in college what's argo organic chemistry oh okay i got it smarty pants i love that class um i hate it i also had a teacher that was in love with me and he just gave me oh my god you slut i didn't do anything with him um yeah so i met him and then he got my number to study because I like don't ever know what's going on in that class um obviously immediately found him on social media no evidence of a girlfriend at all nothing on Twitter nothing

on Instagram thoroughly examined and I was like okay feeling pretty good about this so we started studying together and we would go to like Starbucks and like on campus and off campus and stuff and I'm in this club that raises service dogs on campus wow so I invited him to come to one of our events and he shows up like early like all alone like it was a yoga event so he came with dogs you have your life seems very interesting i love this um and then so he like shows up all alone and then we're talking about halloween because this was a few weeks ago and he was like oh yeah so like my girl wants me to be peter pan so she can be wendy and i was like at this point we had hung out like multiple times never mentioned her I was like kind of I thought he was gay for a

second like it's a whole um and since then he's like he like came over to my apartment to meet my dog like we I studied at his apartment for like four hours like never mentioned his girlfriend ever um and then we like we hung out there's this nature trail I like taking my dog to and he was like oh I want to come with you sometime so we went last weekend and he mentioned his girlfriend but like just by her name and I only know that because I found her social media and but like he was never like oh my girlfriend he'd be like yeah whatever just in conversation um and then he would like walk into class one day and he was last week and he was like oh my god you look nice today and like we'd always again like study together um and then he comes to more

of the club meetings like I invited him to more of them and he came to one of a couple of them but the one this week I walk in and he has his girlfriend there yeah and so and so he introduces us to each other and he and was like yeah two of the greatest people on earth is how he introduced oh my god to each other and then she like left early so I didn't even talk to her that much and he was like talking to me and we studied afterwards um and then we we hung out this morning and yesterday so i saw him tuesday through saturday of this week every single day um and we hung out yesterday we got flu shots together before our romantic i got flu shots with my boyfriend two weeks ago oh my god yeah and then this morning we went on like a different

nature trail and we're like taking it a weekly thing or whatever but he still like never mentions his girlfriend ever but i like now met her yeah but when he introduced us it was like this is my girlfriend and this is my friend from my organic chemistry class it was literally two of the greatest people on this he wants you guys to be best friends wow he wants to have a threesome wait question does his girlfriend hate you like could you pick up on those vibes like did you was there weird vibes between you two i don't think so like she seems nice and she's like very like girl next door like just a kind genuine person with her that works with her like and so is he which is weird like he's not shady yeah i mean he is shady though i don't know if he's

shady maybe he's just a nice guy no that's that's me nice guys don't exist they do exist no they don't yes i don't i don't know there are nice guys that do exist does he have any like so friend friend wise who are his other friends does he have a lot of other female friends or is it mostly guys so you think he's got a lot of people like he's mentioned other like girl names yeah and he just like seems like that type who's like had a lot of girlfriends because you also did wonder if he was gay at a little point yeah yeah that's what i think he's just a nice person yeah like has he like blatantly like hit on you no right but okay there's his girl so does his girlfriend go to the same school as you guys yes so where is she that's the question that i

have where is she the whole time like if you guys are studying and doing all of that kind of stuff and going on all of these nature walks i just wonder where she is because if i so as someone I'm friends with straight guys and who have who have slash had girlfriends and it's more of like a oh we'll all go hang out sort of thing if it's like oh cool I met this really cool girl I think we'll all be friends I think it's just a little weird that like you are being like an I don't call you an isolated friend but like it's not like you are being brought into a friend group with the girlfriend well he invited me to a kind of invited me to a friend's giving tomorrow okay and she'll be there i don't know okay if she's not there there's something fucking weird up then

what okay so you're studying science what's her major communication uh she's like into like philosophy and stuff like that so i think you're like his science friend and she yeah do you like him i haven't figured that out okay so here's the thing so my initial reaction through all of this is i think a guy who like will name drop a girlfriend or anything like that a couple times and I don't I'm not thinking that now but I just want to say it because that's where my mind went immediately is kind of like a here I'm letting you know that I have a girlfriend but I'm still going to kind of flirt with you but then if anything happens like I've already told like you're you're an accomplice in this as much as I am in that kind of thing uh which I think like

isn't great and I think like right off the bat um I do think like hanging out with some like yeah maybe maybe it is true that he just has like a lot of female friends and it's not weird but i would say like i think your instincts of like immediately like looking on social media to see if he's a girlfriend and all of that that shows that you're a great girl's girl like you're looking out for other girls which is a fantastic thing so i think like moving forward with this friendship i would like talk to her like try and get to know her and then like if she doesn't feel uncomfortable and you don't have feelings for him and you and him can just be friends totally go for it but if you start to develop like feelings for him i'd back away or if you can sense that like

she feels super uncomfortable or weird about it then i would also kind of like take a step back because like i think it's just a matter of like i think i think your instincts are right like totally right and i would have done the exact same thing i've been like why aren't you fucking bringing up your girlfriend like this is kind of weird but i think like it could be just like a friend sort of thing but i think like that only is gonna work if like everyone's on the same page including his girlfriend and maybe you'll get along with her because you said you had a friend who works with her is she cool would you like her I don't know she just seems like very like like the best way to describe is like girl next door yeah and like like I feel like she's

one of those people that's impossible to like not like yeah oh I hate those people I genuinely do though I know I know exactly what you mean but I mean yeah I think like I would say go to the friends giving tomorrow and see how it all like lays out and then she might be your best friend yeah she might be really cool and maybe she's hella fucking busy and then she's doing her philosophical stuff and he's doing his science stuff and yeah they just don't yeah like he she might not like to hike but he knows that you do so yeah but maybe she doesn't know too you know like maybe she doesn't know you guys are going on like yeah but when when you guys met did she see did anything like seem weird or did she already know who you were i mean he he never really like

explained like it seemed like she had already had somewhat yeah yeah she didn't explain like oh this is how i know this girl or anything yeah yeah i mean but i was just a nice person that wants yeah i would then maybe the next time you go on a hike you should be like hey you should bring or whatever her name like yeah bring like well like you should invite her and like have her come along and i think if he's like oh no let's not and if he tries to keep it like separate then i think like that's a point of being like okay cool maybe your girlfriend's like not super comfortable with this and like i'm not in like the i'm not out here trying to make your girlfriend like feel like threatened at all yeah but i think tomorrow will be very telling if she's there

yeah you should talk to her yeah to know her i think that's a good call yeah and then just be where and then if you if you if any of your other friends are there be like yo did it seem like she hated me because sometimes I have a misjudge where I'm talking like no we got along great and it's like oh no no she fucking hates you and I was like oh sick good to know uh and then you can figure out that way but this is interesting please let us know what happens after this friend's giving of course what are you gonna bring mashed potatoes I feel like everyone brings I don't know I probably bring like a pecan pie yeah I love that I've been decided I'm saying pecan now not pecan I've never said pecan yeah well it's ugly and I used to say it now I said

I always say pecan yeah it's way nicer that's amazing well is there any we good is there anything else anything else I think that's it I think that's the the situation oh my god well um congratulations on being smart hi oh my god hi I can't believe this is actually happening okay so basically earlier this year I had my first proper relationship like serious where let me just start this off with I've always had like intense trust issues because my parents were divorced because my dad cheated on my mom always been a bit skeptical going into a relationship and then um the relationship feels good everything was fine until the end when when he eventually broke up with me

nothing made sense with why he broke up with me so I decided to try and like do some snooping to try and put two and two together because honestly I just needed to have this final closure and what I found out was up until a week before the guy took my virginity he was sleeping with his ex still and that sort of just really messed me up from an emotional point of view because before it I was sort of saving myself for marriage and yeah basically that's the situation but recently I've met this really amazing guy and he honestly has treated me so well with respect and all of that but yeah I just want some advice on how I can move forward after having such a rough start with relationships and like almost you know I know this isn't the same person and just

how do I just start moving forward with someone because honestly I really just I'm struggling with that at the moment yeah can I ask how long ago that was with the original douchebag shithole of a guy well um the relationship started in July and ended around about beginning of september okay and then you started seeing this new guy who's great when about october ish okay so like only like a month in between yeah yeah i mean i think like that makes total sense to me why you'd still feel like that i think even if it was like years before like that kind of stuff like it sticks with you but i think i would have you told the guy that you're seeing have you told him about this

previous relationship and what happened with it yeah i spoke to him about it and how i couldn't really give 110 percent quite yet and he seemed to be rather understanding about it that's great yeah i mean i think that's like a great thing to acknowledge and for him to also know i mean i think i think it's hard to jump into a new relationship from a like a shit one without kind of keeping that same baggage and especially when it's like so quickly right after and I think if you can like know that this is a different guy and that this isn't the exact same situation and if you can like communicate to him through the whole process of it or if there's certain things that like if he says or does something like triggering wise that you realize my my favorite

thing which I say I say on here all the time that my therapist says like if it's hysterical it's historical so if he does something and like your reaction and you just feel like oh my god this is taking me right back to that place explain that to him and like talk him through it as it's happening because i think you're going to be able to if you don't let yourself get into your own head and like spiral away and like start like being alone and comparing like him to this other guy if you can kind of let him in on that he's going to be able and you give him the opportunity to show you that he's not that guy. I'll also say, I think having a good level of skepticism about people in dating is good. And like, I think that's healthy. And I think as much as like getting hurt and like

fucked over by someone totally sucks. I think that doesn't happen over and over and over again. Once that happens, once you do become like a little bit jaded. Um, and I don't think that prevents you from having another relationship, but I think it really does. Like it protects you and you're able to like fight for yourself and protect yourself and your heart from like going through something similar like that again so I would also give yourself credit in that stance that you've already been through that you already know those kind of like quote-unquote warning signs or things like that and you're not going to put yourself you're not going to end up in a situation like that again because you've already been through it and know that like making sure

that your picker and like who you're picking to date that's what I think is the most like important part. Cause there's not something, I don't know. There's like shitty guys out there and this can happen to anyone. And at any point, and like, you can never ensure in any relationship that that kind of stuff's not going to happen, but it's just about making sure that the people you're dating, you really, really like them as people, not just because they're not cheating or not doing something shitty. Yeah. And I also want to touch on something that you said before about the guy you said that he took your virginity and i don't i think we put a lot of like emphasis on the first time that we're sexually active with someone and if you reframe your mind instead of

saying like that someone took your virginity because that you're giving him a lot of power saying that he took something away from you um and so it's it's more like you shared this intimate experience with you with him and he did like disrespect that but don't think of it in a way that he took something from you yeah it can be like i had sex for the first time he happened to be there like it's not about him it's about you a hundred percent and like we've always said i it's i don't think it's about the first person you sleep with i think it's about the last person you sleep with and i when my high school i lost my i didn't know i didn't leave i had sex with my high school boyfriend for the first time uh and I when we broke up even though it was mutual I was

devastated because like that to me I was like oh this was like such an important thing and I realized like later on I was like oh my god I didn't even feel like it was so important I just everyone told me it was so important I thought it was supposed to be so important that I thought I had to feel like that and then now in a relationship I've been with someone for so much longer I don't think about the guy that i had sex with the first time at all and i think like especially if you were saving yourself until marriage there can be something about how that's only supposed to be shared with one person and i think like that's fine if some people want to do that but i i'm also like i'm a huge advocate for like doing what you want to do and like doing like

what you enjoy and just because he turned out to be like a total shit person like doesn't mean that that experience was like wasted on someone because it wasn't about him it was it's about you and it's a great thing like you're like fuck yeah i'm like a hot bad bitch like you didn't it doesn't need to be about like him he doesn't have anything you know yeah that makes a lot of sense yeah and also we gotta we got there's so you have to get through those like shit guys and those shit people to get to the good ones i always say that like the more shit and shitty people you date early on you don't have then everyone has like a number until they get to the person who they're supposed to be with and if you get the shit ones over with you're gonna get

towards that end one and be happy and it's gonna be easy oh my god it's gonna be and because you're gonna be like oh i already know how to deal with all this shit it's not gonna be like you get into this like fantastic perfect relationship and then shit starts to go wrong and you're like i don't know how to deal with any of that kind of stuff i think it's great to kind of learn how to be in a relationship with the people that you're not going to be dating forever or be with forever because we're all going to make mistakes we're all going to figure out and learn and then by the time that you meet that person that you're going to end up with you're going to be so ready yeah it was like practice before exactly and it'll be easy yeah and the sex will be good you know that'll that'll

be the best part yeah oh that sounds great honestly yeah but i'm so sorry that happened fuck him yeah fuck him they all say that you will at least have one bad story before you hit 20 so yeah you better be mine only one well i'm gonna there's gonna be a few more yeah and i'm not gonna i'm not gonna lie to you they don't necessarily stop after 20 yeah but um you get to be a lot you get to be uh stronger yeah stronger through it all and you learn a lot and then by the time that yeah you're ready for it you're like i got this yeah i've got history i can figure this out yeah so hopefully that helps i mean it really did help honestly i put a lot of things into perspective i'm glad me too yeah and have fun with this new guy and like enjoy

enjoy when it's good and that kind of stuff and like obviously don't turn your nose if like something feels a little bit off like still trust your gut instinct but I think like there's no point in like spending a time in a relationship like waiting for the other shoe to drop like if it drops it drops like might as well have fun while it's while you're having fun yeah thank you so much for this opportunity really your advice was amazing and it really it is beginning to help to start thinking about it from the perspective of he didn't actually take something from me but rather he was just a part of something that happened yeah well thank you so much thank you so much

I'm so excited oh my god I'm so excited too oh I wish that this was better circumstances to finally like get to actually talk to you but it's okay we love drama and we love the dirty shit I'm not I don't mean dirty like like meaty meaty there we go no yeah that's totally what I've got for you oh my god my life is a mess but um well I guess um should we just like get it yeah tell us what's up okay so basically love my boyfriend to death we've been together for seven years um I'm 23 he's 24 we were like high school sweethearts whole nine yards um but he's kind of driving me absolutely insane he like I don't know how to explain it without totally making him seem like the dumbest person ever but he's a man it's okay he's a guy we're

privy to we're both straight we understand that like we can't choose that sometimes boys are dumb and we're still into them yeah so basically a couple weekends ago he had six days straight and so we didn't have any time together we also work opposite schedules so we didn't see each other for like two weeks um even though we lived together um it was just really difficult but so he had a three-day weekend the following weekend we had like this whole big plan to like go and on a date night and do like a ton of stuff just to be able to finally spend time together. Um, but he ended up playing video games every day for like 10 hours. Um, and so I kind of lost my mind and I'm very proud of myself because I did it very calmly. And I was like, Hey, I'm really upset with you.

can you please like hang out with me like I'm tired of this because I also work and go to school full time so it's kind of like if I have the time to make with you like please hang out with me so basically he like didn't do um any of his chores like I said I work and go to school full time and I kind of just lost my shit I've kind of been going through like a depressive episode too so for him to just kind of totally disregard like me and all of our like priorities and everything it kind of just pissed me off um and so he was like oh I will um he was like okay well let's go on a date night tomorrow and then his twin sister who I've had problems with our entire relationship calls him and is like I need you I'm going through shit right now can we please

hang out tomorrow and I was kind of just like man what like why why does she have to call as soon as we are finally being able to spend time together and um it's just annoying because like they went through all this stuff in their um childhood like their parents were alcoholics they were um like verbally abused a lot and so whenever um they're going through something she just always calls him and expects him to cancel everything and regardless of like what he has going on she just doesn't care um and then we can get into like his alcoholic parents later but it's just a mess and I just I've like kind of at my wits end and I don't know how to handle it anymore because oh I just have lost all of my patience for him for his sister for his parents

like I just don't know what to do yeah no I understand that sounds super frustrating um what I would say is I think like to address okay the video game part to address first like I totally feel you like that's incredibly annoying and as somebody who lives with her boyfriend there's something that like there's some people just have different ideas of spending time together and that's something that like mods and i had to like learn and understand that i was like just because we live together and we sleep in the same bed every night if i'm unconscious we're not hanging out right and for him it was like oh no like we're around or if i was if he didn't fall asleep first i fell asleep first and he's watching movie he's like no i feel like you're there with

me and it was important that i was like no we have to like have the same quality time that we would spend and plan to spend if we weren't living together so like if we weren't living together we were just dating you'd have to we'd have to like plan a date and go do something and that's like a hard thing I would also say like the tough part is when and this is something that I've also had to learn when like when two people have like busy schedules and things like that there's it's it's hard to factor in like deep like self-care like taking time for yourself after a really busy time and then also taking time with your partner and i think like if it's a habit and this is something that just keeps happening that like he's gonna like play video games instead of hanging out

with you when you guys had plans i think like there needs to be a conversation about like okay so like let's figure out how like you can do both how you can have the time that like you need after having like worked for so like work for so many days that like makes like decompresses you and like is your like self-care maybe video games or his self-care and stuff like that but so it's not choosing all or nothing because I think like he needs his alone time okay this is also I say this as someone who does not I don't need alone time ever like I am fine I could hang out with people at all times like forever but Mott's like my boyfriend needs he needs his alone time and it's something that I've had to learn of being like oh I'm not going to enjoy our quality time together

if you haven't also had your alone time because then this isn't quality time for you like it's something that everybody needs but i think that's something that like you guys have to sit down and have that like conversation of being like okay well so how about we have plans we'll do uh we'll hang out we'll get we'll do like dinner and a movie that night and then something that physically removes you from where you live yeah so he doesn't have an excuse where he can sit down and play video games for 10 hours you can maybe you can play if he needs his alone time play video games for five hours yeah you have the other five hours and then you guys go out and go do something because then it's not just I don't know it kind of makes that feeling a little bit more special too I think

that's like a good thing in long-term relationships and then I would say for the sister stuff it's hard because I know that you said that you have issues with her but and I'm not like discrediting that like she like she might be like a total bitch um but at the like when it boils down to like their relationship like their kids who dealt with like emotional trauma at home and that's something that's not only bonded them together it's something that like they're both gonna deal with for the rest of their lives and they're the only ones who know how to deal with it like they they just did it together so that's something that they have to constantly deal with and her calling him if something goes wrong and her needing him that's it's not a threat to you so

she might like not you guys might not get along or whatever but that actively is not a threat to you at all that's something that like i don't think i'm assuming that she couldn't count on her parents so she counted on him and i think he probably felt the same way about her but he's it's not even just like oh she doesn't have any it's not that i wouldn't say it's not that his sister's like oh like i'm more important than his relationship and anything like like than his girlfriend in the relationship and anything like that it's just i would think it's just an immediate it like trigger response when something happens she goes back into that headspace of like how it was growing up and she needs her brother and that's not something that i also think he's never

going to be able to deny her of that as well because that's something that like again they went through together and he completely understands that um and that's something that like i get that like family baggage and like you're saying that his like parents alcoholics and all of that stuff like that sucks and it's so hard and i'm not going to discredit the fact that it's hard for you but it's definitely like really hard for him and his family and his sister as well and i think like you have every right to get like frustrated on his behalf especially if they're like treating them badly or if they have in the past or like all of that stuff but it's hard to kind of get anyone like if you wanted like him to cut off like relationship with his parents and if you see

that it's really toxic it's so hard to watch someone like deal with that kind of stuff but like you can't convince someone or get someone to do something like that because it's it's it's so much out it's just so far out of your control right right yeah because it's like she doesn't know that you guys are like going through stuff it's just like she happened to call during a time where you were where you were going to talk to him so you can't blame her for that but also he needs to um put he needs to make you make time for what you want and it seems like he's not making time for you at all yeah and that makes sense that like that built-up frustration that you have because like if he's not making this quality time for you if you guys had like a date night and

everything was great and fine i'm sure if his sister had called the next day it wouldn't have set you off and you wouldn't have felt like this because you would have your needs would have been getting met but i think right now everybody it feels like everybody else's needs are getting met and yours aren't. And as much as that sucks, I think it's, it's not a, it's not like a, it's not a terrible place to be because what that means is that he trusts you so much that you're always going to be there and that you are someone that like he can bail on and he can like, because he can count on you and he knows that it's going to like, that you're going to be okay. But that also goes in the level of you have, if he's going to treat you, if he's going to like think that in

that way that relationship and your relationship is strong enough that you can tell him like hey no like this is something that we need to plan yeah stop taking me for granted exactly time for me and because it's I don't think it's not it's not um it it shows how much he loves and cares about you that like he feels comfortable enough to like do that kind of stuff but because he feels that comfortable and loves you so much I think it's also like free reign for you then to be like hey no we need to spend some quality time together like as much as like i love our like life and i love like living together and all of that kind of stuff like i don't want to stop dating you and that's something that i think a lot of like long-term relationships like go through

like ebbs and flows of that and i've said that in our my my moth and i our relationship for a long time would be like i was very much like let's fucking let's hang out let's hang out let's hang out and once you live together it just can get really like easy and into this pattern and then once you start making that effort and you start going out, you start having fun, then both of you want to do that more often. But what I had to learn was not taking away from like self-care solo time and then just creating our own separate time that was able to have fun that way. But I think you just have to have, have you had that conversation with him at all or anything like in that like realm? Yeah. Yeah, definitely. We've had, well, we've had a lot of conversations like

that um definitely about oh our like relationship it's just we've gotten into this routine and he's like oh yeah I want to spice it up I want to be a better man for you I want to do this I want to do that and then he just won't follow through um and it's really hard well I just talked to my therapist about this the other day she was like you are a very powerful woman but I feel like he is like feeling like you're taking power away so it's hard because I want to be like let's plan this let's do this let's do that but I'm trying to kind of take a step back and let him take care of any everything um not everything but let him have a say and let him you know make the first move and plan something and um you know make an agenda for us or clean the house when he wants to

or you know kind of just do whatever he wants just because I can be I know that I can be very controlling and demanding because I am a very like strong person I'm a very powerful person which my therapist says and I really appreciate but um which I know can be really overbearing so I'm like I'm really trying hard it's just uh like I don't know how to go about well his sister does know like kind of what we are going through um because they talk about literally everything and I've talked to her about what we're going through too um because she is a very motivated person too and she's like oh if we can just get him to you know do this this and this like it'll be so great so she has an idea but it's like I just I feel bad because I don't want to be mad at

him but like um i we've talked about how um we want our lives to be and how we want to have date nights every two weeks and how um i guess like we want to come together at the end of the day and talk about our day but i guess he's just not holding up his end of the deal if that makes sense yeah words mean nothing if there's no action to it yeah exactly i mean that's what he's notorious for is saying saying saying but doing nothing yeah that's kind of been an issue for our entire relationship is him saying that he wants to do something you know he'll send me you know this big long text message about how he hasn't been doing his job and how he feels bad and how he wants us to do better and yada yada and then you know literally the next week this whole thing

goes on and he just doesn't do what he is saying yeah I mean my petty advice my petty advice would be, I totally, I've been in your position. I completely understand. Um, and yeah, my petty advice would be start acting. Okay. Again, this is really not great advice. I said it was petty. I've prefaced it is start kind of treating the relationship, how he treats it and make plans with your friends. Even if you don't have plans with friends, go to target by yourself and don't be as like, I don't want to say don't be as available, but like, don't be as around because I think he is taking advantage of the fact that you live together and like, like that you are, because i completely relate to being like a dominant like a dominating personality and just

like having that presence i'm very similar and being like if you just make plans with your other friends if you just do all this if even just being out of the house and so then it's never you being like hey babe like let's come do something let's do something and he's trying he then is trying to catch up with you and then i think if he you can make him miss you that is the petty advice that i would give because i think right now like he's not you guys are just seeing the situation like on a you're just seeing quality time in a different way and i think if you can take away that version of quality time that he has and like and you can create that like get like that space where he's like missing you and being like well what's she doing where is she going like what is

happening i think uh maybe he'll be able to come around a bit but that's again petty advice yeah no that's actually really good that's definitely um yeah i could see that definitely being a solution for sure you're just busy you're like oh i'm so sorry and he's like hey babe where are you i just got home and then you just like wait 20 minutes to respond you're like oh i'll be home soon then he's like what what's happening and then he wants to hang out with you yeah yeah definitely thank you so much thank you yeah hopefully this helps you guys i know well thank you so much for taking my call too oh my gosh of course thanks so much for listening to the podcast yeah oh my life literally my entire life i love you guys bye

hello hi hi i'm so sorry you just heard me compliment your profile picture you're so cute yeah i did oh thank you i love your dress in the picture again sorry i'm being weird thank you you're all good how are you i'm good how are you good we'd love to hear what's going on give us give us the scoop oh the deets all right so um like i have a very serious boyfriend we've been together for like over a year but i definitely think that like i could marry him um but i don't think that the sex is very great it's gotten to the point where i'll like get very bored and I've like sometimes like I drink before we have sex or like I'm super high and that doesn't necessarily make it any better um I've talked to him about it but we've talked over text about it

like seriously and then one time I was kind of tipsy and we talked about it but I'm just scared to do it in person because in his most recent relationship that ended they were pretty serious and they were together for a couple years and she was older than him and she like thought that she was going to marry him but he was just not ready for that at the time and she ended up cheating on him and like having sex with someone else so I feel like it's just a very touchy subject and I don't want to hurt his feelings yeah can I ask how old you guys are yeah he's um eight years older than me so he's or seven years i'm 27 i'm 21 and he's 27 going to be 28 okay okay what about the sex makes it bad yeah um i just every single time i feel like

it's just about him okay are you faking it like orgasms um i know i try not to let me try not wait so are you coming or are you not no i'm not okay but i like some it like feels good in other ways but then i never do finish does he know that you're not finishing i've talked about it to him before because he knows that i've never finished with any person okay i've never been with sexually so like penetrative sex doesn't do anything i mean it does welcome to the club well i know does he go down on you yeah he does but he's bad again just like i don't know there's just like not something about it with like previous partners I feel like I've always been grossed out about it just like I'm just not that into it so I think that could possibly play a role in that as well

okay personal I mean I'm saying I was gonna say personal question these are all personal questions do you masturbate I do so I do I do get off like on my own okay okay great um I okay here's the thing he's 27 and yeah uh he needs to be better at sex and i know that's it feels like okay if someone ever told me that like oh wow you need to get better at this you're not good at this i would have a total breakdown i get that yeah but i don't think that he's gonna feel the same way at all because there just is there just tends to be this like different and if he gets pissed off and like upset or whatever like yeah there should be room for improvement um my my boyfriend when he was in high school was hooking up with one of his female like friend friends they weren't

even dating and she was like you suck at this I have to teach you everything and he was like it was the greatest lesson I ever had and he wants it to be enjoyable and fun for you and I think like not that you're not I think if you make that statement which I totally understand having like never come with a partner before but I think for him I think he's kind of just treating this as like oh yeah that's it's never gonna happen that's just a you thing versus like no it will and it totally can we just need to figure out a way to do that so I think you're actually in a good position that like you can make sex about you can make sex better and like fix the fact that he's bad in bed to being like hey I really want I really like I'm super attracted to you I really like you and I

really feel like we can get there and i can get there with you and i really want to so like let's try some new stuff out to see if that's going to work for me and you can make it about you um and i think like i'd i'd say like if if you know like what turns you on like and even if you don't just like trying different things with him i would also say a great thing if you use like a vibrator if you have any like couples toy sort of thing that like you can be like hey take my vibrator and like this is how you can get me off in a way and i think like i recommend the crescendo oh yeah we just got these ones not sponsored called the crescendo yeah dude they're great they're great they're very great great with partners great alone they bend and flex and can wrap around

things and go inside things so they're great yeah they're very fun and and you can control it from your phone so like you could be doing something and he can be like doing different vibrations from his phone yeah and it gives him like if if he doesn't have a ton of like sexual experience or isn't super sexually confident as opposed to like coming at it from like hey what are you doing wrong it's like let's introduce this fun new thing that's going to be exciting for both of us and i think if you can get to a point where like he can see like because as much as like i'm sure you're fantastic at pretending that you're like not bored and like not having like a great time i think once you see like once he can see like you actually really enjoying yourself that's going to

be a huge turn on for him and he's going to be like oh fuck yeah i want to get to this like i want to keep doing this kind of stuff so she enjoys it um yeah and if he doesn't then he's like a fucking selfish dick and like good thing you know that now you know also true how often are you um getting higher drinking when you're having sex um not i feel like it just happened more recently because more often just because i think that it could make it more enjoyable um in the past i didn't okay i was just so we've been together for a year so then like I guess like four to three months got it because that can make you like space out and not emotionally available as well um does he like turn you on like when you make out with him like are you like

turned off like what at what point does it get like bad do you know what I mean yeah so like is it like making out you're like this is great and like does it get to like at what point are you feeling like it's not great like is it just like as soon as he sticks it in or is it like yeah as soon as he sticks it okay so that he's just not good like okay and do you know how many obviously you don't have to like be specific but like does he have a lot of sexual experience or not so much um he seems like he had yeah like uh he's never outright i outright told me like a specific number but I've expressed mine yeah and he like it seems like and mine's 10 so it seems like it'd be higher than that from just like the way that he was acting but I honestly

have no idea yeah I don't know to me it seemed like he might not have as much experiences as you in a way and like maybe he doesn't if he's kind of being a little bit self and also if he's I got he is older than you though because I also think at a certain point like when I was when I was younger and i was dating guys who were younger i i don't know it was so much more about them because also like i wasn't making it about me and like it's not until women make it about themselves with guys then guys make it about girls do you mean like it sucks like there's not every guy is gonna be selfish in bed until there's one girl being like no that's not how this goes yeah and then that guy's never gonna be selfish in bed again but like when you're like people can

just get into that habit so i think as much as like it might feel uncomfortable for you to kind of like be that person who's going to introduce that i think it's going to make it's not it making it about you isn't inherently actually really making it about you it's going to make the whole experience better and he's going to enjoy himself more too yeah and be vocal about what you want yeah and like what you like if you can figure out like if you don't know but if you like watching porn like seeing any stuff that like does turn you on specifically and like giving so much positive reinforcement to that to being like oh my god i love it when you do that kind of thing then that's gonna like create the more fun sort of stuff and then also i would say uh don't have like not that

you said you're doing this but also make sure that you're having sex when you're in the mood too so like if you're not in the mood and you're like oh i'm really like not feeling this then you're gonna start just continuing to do that and it's just not gonna be something that like you look forward to that is sexy it does kind of make it about him because you didn't want to necessarily have sex to begin with um and it might be fun one time if or not i don't know if again i say this like i know your entire sex life but if you can like set the mood to whereas you feel really sexy and you come on to him and you really make it about like you and take control there might be a way to like have that be something that makes you you feel like you feel sexier and you feel harder

but if you go at it and you pursue it it does inherently kind of make it about you in the beginning and i think that could be like a fun thing with him and yeah also guys like straight men want to make girls come they like do even the shitty ones like they really like they want to make you come like it is because it's a blow to their ego if they don't and he might have been with girls before you who are all just faking it and have all kind of had the same like reaction as you have and he's thinking that that's kind of normal and then you're gonna come then he's gonna be like oh my god wow what was i doing all this fucking time yeah you know was it yeah was it always bad from the beginning um i don't think so but i think that could have also been because

like i was more excited than yeah thanks so like i try to make sure i only do it when i am in the mood but then it just gets like i feel like it takes too long sometimes yeah i'm just like there also how often are you masturbating when he's not around pretty often that might be part of it too if you're masturbating a lot and then yeah it's you're used to coming a certain way yeah with whatever toy or whatever you're using and then um he's not satisfying you because you're used to a certain type of stimulation and he's bad yeah i think i never thought about that yeah because the excitement the newness of the relationship has worn off yeah and so you've got to figure out different ways to and i think that happens though in like the newness of relationship

like that attraction and that like oh like i'm excited that i think can mask itself as like i'm really into this like sexually and then when that once that kind of fades you realize like oh shit we've been having the same kind of sex and i haven't been getting off but it was okay at the beginning because i was so super like it was all new and exciting that that was like a turn on in itself that now it's like oh this is going to take a little bit more work yeah um and i would also say don't kill me for saying this you've been dating a year and you see a future with him and that's totally great i think at the end of the day if you guys can't match up like sex like sexually wise and it's not working for you does not make you a bad person for needing to be with

someone where it does work because like sex is a like if it's important to you it's important to you and as someone who it's very important to it's important to me that like I I very much once I started like dating someone who like I was like very much in sync with on that I was like oh wow I'm so glad I didn't like I didn't continue to date stuff like date these other people where I like liked it but it wasn't like I was still wanting something like I wanted it wasn't all there it wasn't all there and I didn't always necessarily give everyone else the opportunity but I think like if you give him that opportunity and like he grows from it he takes it it's great it's wonderful but I think if it doesn't work and like then from there like you owe it to your own

like sexual pleasure to be like okay if this is not something that you can like be serious about like working on with me then like you know you gotta get you gotta get off like you can't just masturbate for your whole like relationship right but if you're not telling him I know you said you're yeah scared to tell him in person but if you're not telling him then he can't fix it yeah and i think truly as much as awkward as it feels to do it in person i do think in person is way less intense than over text message because if you do it in person you can kind of just like bring it up in a really cat like and blurt it out yeah looking at a text message and then waiting for him to respond and a text feels like kind of planned out and it can feel like it puts a lot

more pressure on both of you to like come up with something like the right slash wrong thing to say because there's no right or wrong thing to say here but if you bring it up in person and it can be like much more of like the exciting like hey i really like want to come with you and i and if you tell him that you masturbate he might be like hella into that and the idea of like oh wow i like i want i want to like figure that kind of stuff out and it can be fun it's like hey let's have a fucking weekend i'm locking ourselves in this bedroom and like we're not leaving until i come yeah yeah and he'll be like sick yeah and i i hate to like keep harping on that but if like you're masturbating a lot and you know that you can make yourself come in like five minutes and

you know exactly what you can do when you're with him you might be getting bored because you're not coming in that same amount of time i i but okay so i masturbate a good amount i would say but i also think that like i would if if i was sleeping with someone who wasn't good at it i wouldn't and i would be the exact same way i wouldn't enjoy it because i'd be like i can do this so much faster on my own but if he gets good at it then you enjoy the process and the build-up to it because that's the issue that's what you need to enjoy you need to enjoy like the whole act of it and if it's all about the conclusion to me that usually means that they're not very good like you should enjoy the whole process and he needs to get better at the whole process and then i think

that'll like that'll make you enjoy it more because you're not just going to be like waiting for it to be over to get to the end part because you'll be like oh this is fun this whole time but he just needs to get better at it and there's a wonderful book that we talk about all the time called she comes first i think is wonderful it essentially teaches guys how to go down on girls and it's incredibly helpful she doesn't like it though but you i mean but if you if you if you haven't necessarily liked it with other partners i think like there's if you really like your partner and you trust him and you care about him i think like trying it one time and then being like okay i don't like it or i do like it and moving from there yeah and i haven't read the

book but i'm sure it talks about other ways yeah no it talks about not just like going down no it like breaks down like because so many guys are like have no idea what slash where a clit is and like they like got they like googled it once and then got it wrong and then they're focusing on something that you're like yeah no it's not doing shit for me and then it's a good way of like and it's written from a guy and it's a good way to uh get them to like be excited about it and how it is about you too but i think also even if you tell him like it just feels like it's kind of all about you right now and I want it to be about me that'll like break his heart in like a motivating good way yeah I had told him that before oh what did he say um it was over text though so it probably

didn't come off the right way yeah maybe but I don't even remember it he said that he was just gonna like work on things or something like along those lines it probably sounded it sounded a lot better than that yeah but if he needs a specific goal and I think telling him in the moment like because things can change something might feel good right now but it doesn't feel good the next time so telling him in the moment what you actually like um can help with that yeah yeah and then i would think i would also like as much as it sucks to admit to him like and be like i know that i've said i've never come with a partner but like i'm that's not a me thing like it's like i i know i want to i can get myself there which means i can get there with a partner like you

just have to want to like go through that with me and like work on that with me it's not going to like necessarily be like super quick the first time but like we should both want to get there you know i hope that helped at all did it and that definitely did help well let us know fingers crossed um i never mind what oh my god finger what are you gonna fucking say no nasty you fucking nasty um but uh yeah again vibrator try that stuff out i think i think it'll be i think you you've got like a great opportunity here to have i always love when like the homework that we're giving people it's like lock yourself in a bedroom and just fuck until you come yeah but um great advice i mean it's the advice i want to get um but yeah i hopefully it'll it'll

it'll get better and update us let us know i will thank you thank you amazing thanks for calling of course okay have a great one you too bye wait so uh what do you what do you need some advice on let us know what's up um yeah not too much um i just have like an update i guess for you guys yes get it um yeah so when I uh called in last time um I just found out that my dad was cheating on my mom again um with sexual masseuses oh yes that was in April of last year no of this year sorry wow it's all the year's almost over so then I've moved to Italy yeah exactly um so I've moved to Italy um to work on some yachts and um basically

my dad I've learned this from my brother who's older than me but my dad is still seeing these ladies um which is hard um and especially since my mom still doesn't know that uh the affair is going on um and I totally regret not taking Megan's advice um your advice was to like tell my dad and let him know what was going on and tell him that it's not okay and that I know and the episode came out like just as I got to Europe and I was like I wish I had the balls to just say to my dad listen like this isn't okay either you tell mom or I will um and just like sit down with them both and be like this isn't my relationship I get it but it still affects me in one way or another being your daughter um but yeah I just wish I took the advice um

yeah my when I told my brother sorry my mind is so scattered at the moment when I told my brother that I knew he also kind of knew so he said like I knew something was going on because my dad was showing symptoms and not symptoms but like personality traits that he was when he was seeing the first lady that he had a full-on affair with so we both kind of knew which makes us think that our mum does know because she's not dumb and she must know that, you know, something's going on. But after, like, you know, hours and hours of talking to my brother, which, funny enough, this brought us so much closer

than we have ever been. Yeah, we just decided not to tell my mum and that it was going to be the best thing for her and for everybody if we just let it go. And, yeah, I wish I didn't. Your playlist might get you through the workday, but have you ever wondered how your ancestors spent theirs? What work helped them build a life?

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Constant regret of mine. I know it's like really bad to live with regret, but, you know, it is. It's a regret. And I just, yeah, I wish I had your advice because it was so good. It was just, yeah, it was just a little bit too late. Yeah. And that's my update for you guys. Yeah, wish I had taken your advice.

i mean i also get not taking it in the sense that like as much as like i mean i also think i talk a big fucking game on the podcast and be being like yo just like be confrontational like and there's sometimes where i'm like oh i mean i might not do that which i think like at the end of the day like you you never asked to be put in this position and like you don't have like it's not your responsibility and it's like my biggest the thing i hate more than anything is like when you get when you're in the middle of something that you didn't ask to be a part of at all or like when someone does something that involves you and you're like well now you put this on my plate and like i didn't like why do i have to be the one to kind of deal with it and at the end of

the day like they are your parents and like it's not your responsibility at all and i think like i understand like the feeling like regretful for it but i think what you said about your mom probably knowing is like you're probably spot on like i and at the end of it maybe it like maybe she knows and maybe it's something that like they're dealing with or she's come to terms with and like is she's okay with and like knows where it's at and like or she's in denial yeah or maybe she doesn't want anyone you know like maybe she doesn't want to talk about it maybe she doesn't want like her kid like maybe she feels she might feel embarrassed and not want you guys to know or in a way of like she like in a way that your dad hasn't necessarily like tried to protect you

guys quote unquote like from this kind of stuff maybe your mom is like she doesn't want to have you to feel to make you guys feel like you're involved in like their kind of stuff but I also think like yeah for sure you're if there's there's it's never if you ever do feel like you want to bring any of that up I don't ever think it's like too late it's just like don't feel like you missed your opportunity but like also don't feel like it's something that you have to do because as your kid it's not I mean as their kid it's not it's not your responsibility and I don't think your mom would fault you I don't think anyone would fault you at all for like not wanting to bring something like that sucky to her attention but also if like if you would feel better doing

it I don't think it's too late yeah I have a question like this is like is it like a sexual thing like the is the going to a masseuse a sexual thing or it just like yeah well from like what I found when I went to the thing originally it was like photos of you know women in sexy lingerie and email and messages being like are you available tonight and it's like you know is Cindy available tonight you know it wasn't like oh yeah I'd like a a car massage with hot stones and lavender oil yeah wait so is it like was it like a like a website or a service or was it like one person so I don't really it was like so where I live back home it's a small town so um there are a few like known places that have the service and all of the places that my dad stupidly listed them

in his phone as like where they were like yeah massage which we all know like well at home we all know that that's like a sex parlor basically got it um but actually what I did before I left before I left I went through his phone again and I just changed all of the numbers you are my hero to like random numbers that's so sweet I was like fuck you dad I'm done this is it this is what I'm gonna do this is how I'm gonna get him back you know but I don't yeah he clearly figured it out so that's yeah that's funny though good on you that's creative I've never even thought to do something like that thank you that's amazing yeah when my brother and I were like chatting about it yeah we were like oh we'll like we'll stalk him out and we'll like put a cryptic

like nancy drew um like serial killer note on his car and let him we know and you know we'll tell you why but then my brother was like no we can't do that but like we're not like nancy drew this isn't how this should go down i love this that's so funny i'm happy it brought you and your brother closer together though that's like i think that's like a blessing in disguise through all of this Yeah, for sure. And I'm sure it's something, if your mom knew, she'd be pretty happy, like, would be happy that there's something good that came of it, which is you guys. Getting closer.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And, you know, it happened, like, last time this happened, my brother and I became closer again, so, yeah, it's, it is a blessing in disguise, and it's nice to have someone else to lean on about it, but I just wish, you know, dad's weren't so dumb. I mean, I think we all do wish that. Yeah, for sure. are you going home anytime soon um no plans as of yet um but I'm hoping to be home for a wedding in

March but we'll see thank you so much is there anything else you want to share no thank you I love no I feel like I love the podcast I listen to it when I'm cleaning which is kind of lame but like when I'm cleaning all day um yeah and I love it thank you that's a great like duo combination we think so too we're a good combo thank you so much for listening yeah and let us know if anything else happens with your family and stuff yeah i will i hope not well i'm over here i'm hoping not to for your for our all of our sakes i'm hoping that nothing else happens and it's just sunshine and rainbows and yes amazing thank you so much thank you so much bye okay guys we're done that's it that's our one hundo episode it came and it went um that was so fun i loved it that

was like really cool i i'm very excited you guys exist you know what i mean like it's not like you don't i didn't think you didn't exist but like i don't know maybe we can interact because it could just be like before it was just like you know you never put a face to a name but it makes you like real and like you guys have like jobs and i mean we were being nosy and we cut out a lot of like us like small talking but like it's so cool to like i don't know you guys have like full fledged like careers and like just some jobs you guys have fucking cool ass jobs like it's so i don't know it's all just like so interesting to me that like i don't know but like i feel like so cool when cool people listen to our podcast and i'm like whoa i feel so lucky like you care what

yeah like holy shit you should be giving us advice like i am a college dropout um hopefully you guys like this episode um i yep that's it i hope you liked us i mean you have to like this episode please um if you want to call in for an upcoming episode you can leave us a voicemail at 310-694-0976 and international listeners you can send us an audio message at meganpodcast at gmail.com we did it we fucking did it what are we gonna do for 200 i don't know i'll be maybe will do like an actual live show that people can come to oh my god would you guys come to that would you like talk on stage location for us to be where would be a good location hawaii oh i love it yeah so uh aloha guys yeah um that would be really fun i don't know i feel

like it's gonna be like a random i feel like we're gonna it's gonna be like one of the carolinas yeah you know north carolina i would prefer yeah i don't know the difference except one's north and we'll offline it oh for sure um follow us on instagram if you guys haven't yet and make sure you join our facebook group um and what else that's it that's fucking it don't dm us oh yeah i mean you can dm us and also like i'm also very happy if you want to like dm and ask like a quick question of being like hey how many minutes again can i call in for the podcast like sure i'll try and get to those as like much as we can but like it's it's if if we like actually answered all the ones that we have in a dm we wouldn't have a show yeah it would but it would also just be a full-time

job we get way too many yeah we want you guys to keep listening to the podcast um so please call in even if you think that like it's like lame or anything like that we would we would just love to hear it because we want to give you guys advice we don't want to be those assholes we're just ignoring you and also it's not just like for you it's for everyone that's listening and that's also we think is like one of the best parts and i think is probably one of the most helpful parts is the fact that like we might not have gone through something but then someone else can like all comments or any interactions online after the episodes i would be like oh yeah i've been to that exact same thing right we would have never learned that so many of you guys have ripped your

boyfriend's dicks or had threesomes yeah like here you are you called into a podcast and we were like can't relate but here for you and then it was like oh shit lots of y'all can relate which i think is like a is a helpful feeling um so yeah we'll see you guys next time for 101 go like this oh okay you guys gotta watch this it's so interesting go to youtube right now we're drawing a diagram no we're not that was a trick because i know that works for you guys yeah um we'll see you guys next time goodbye don't blame me is a production by me executive produced by melissa demonts camera operator amanda lechner and music by ryan hunter and giacomo picasso part of the her pod network