Don't Blame Me! - S5E12: He Blew My Back Out with Melisa D. Monts

Episode Date: February 17, 2020

This week we're sharing our advice on what do if you hear your mom rubbing one out, handling if your sometimes boyfriend won't post you on social media, if you should take your friend with benefits to a wedding, how not to sleep with your stepbrother, and we have an update from a caller who wasn't sure about her sexuality.    Pre-Order My Book: Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1982110104/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_U_esnrEbTFC0HX2 Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/youre-not-special-meghan-rienks/1129349295?ean=9781982110109#/    Join our PRIVATE Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/dbmsecretgroup  You must answer all questions correctly to be approved!   Follow Us! @meghanrienks www.instagram.com/meghanrienks  @dontblameme  https://www.instagram.com/dontblamemepod/ @sheisnotmelissa www.instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa     Listen to ad-free on Stitcher Premium! For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code 'BLAME,' PLUS exclusive bonus episodes.     Affordable Therapy By State (Curated by Crissy Milazzo): www.tinyurl.com/y64kwdnf    Need Advice?  www.dontblameme.show  Domestic Listeners Call: [phone]   International Listeners Send a Voice Memo To: [e-mail]    … with as much detail as possible under 3 minutes! I'll do my best to share my wonderful words of wisdom. If you're under 18, please get your parent's permission. Advice is for entertainment purposes only, so you can't blame me if I screw up your life. I kid! My advice IS AMAZING. - Want to WATCH this episode as well? Check out my YouTube channel:  http://youtube.com/meghanrienks Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/join/dontblameme See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

hello everybody and welcome back to another episode of don't blame me hello hi this is an eminem episode it is the best kind of episodes don't tell our other episodes oh god so early with the mouth it wasn't even like a juicy one no it was it's exactly what it was it was it's usually and we've lost all of our listeners no they're here for it they like it they like good wet sex um well guys this is an advice podcast if you are new here if you want to call in for an upcoming episode the phone number is 310-694-0976 and if you're an international listener you can send us an audio message at meganpodcast at gmail.com yeah i'm really hot why am i wearing a turtleneck i don't know that's what you brought to wear yeah but i thought it

supposed to be cold today and some days it's really cold in here and some days it's really not and i thought today was gonna be one of the days it was cold well that's what you get for thinking well guys if you want to watch the youtube version you can see my turtleneck otherwise i wore this for nothing i got on this sweater too yeah i like this neon on you half titty out that's what we like to see my bras neon too what oh my god it's the exact same shade blended right in mine is like the same shit as my skin it's like a beige bralette which is not sexy it was cute i saw it it's not yeah also because i'm like recently off my period so this boob is still yep i saw that too dude like has it always been like that i don't know i didn't notice till you brought it up neither

but like maybe it's been like this my whole life and i had no idea but when they were like bigger weren't you able to see i don't know everything about me was bigger yeah but like i feel like it would be more prominent then because both your boobies were bigger than i should look in some pictures and see yeah they were so big i know i've seen pictures i know moss is like you don't you don't want to do that again i was like you don't want me to continue to eat gluten and blow up like a balloon and fucking vomit all the time and i know i'm good i'm good without without that but uh it was a fun time i wish i could just sit here naked yeah i'm gonna be down for that you have no issue with nudity yeah big surprise to everybody i have not at all shocker that had

nothing to do with your time have you ever seen those things where it's like everybody has that one naked friend and if you don't know who it is it's you yeah i mean i know it's me because i'm naked if i'm not in public i'm naked my favorite though air conditioning on sweatpants pulled up right under my boobs tits out no shirt no that's my jam no all naked head to toe that's my jam i like naked top up more than top down i mean bottom naked yeah because like boobs are more cozy rubbing like a furry blanket do you know what i mean yeah it's just that when i keep all my clothes until if i start in clothes and i then i'll keep them on until i'm done with work like if i come home from a long day and then i still have work to do then i keep my clothes on because then i'll

be too cozy so then as soon as it's like a treat as soon as i'm done with my work then that's when i get naked so do you ever wear sweatpants do you have an in-between um my in-between would be like if i've gone out it's shirtless no if i've gone out like to like the mailbox and i put sweatpants on okay oh so but situationally exclusively yeah wow but i do i have like 20 pairs of joggers like i love a jogger yeah but only like yesterday i went to work at a coffee shop so i put the joggers on then came back home finished up work when i was done everything came off oh yeah mine is sweats as soon as i walk through the door i don't know if i've ever sat on my couch in jeans no it's as soon as because i usually have to pee because i really don't like peeing in public as soon as i

get home i pee and then my pants are already off so then yeah if it's that and i still have work to do pants will be off but i'll still have my top and bra on that's fucking weird it is weird that part no it's not even the top it's the bra it's the bra but if i take my bra off you're too i'm too comfortable but then so i'm just walking around like we need to poo i take my bra off in the car when i'm done with something really yeah i take my when we're done with the podcast yeah take my bra off but when i'm doing after an audition i take my bra off in the car i probably only wear bras 25 of the time same so this show shirt is completely see-through if i don't have a bra that's the only reason i have one yeah that's the reason why i because these have this

has little holes and sometimes my like nipple will pop through the hole and it's like what's that cute little pink detail. Should we get into the calls? I want to do it. I'm fucking excited for this. Hey, Megan, Melissa, and potentially guests. My name is Veronica and I'm a 23 year old recent university grad. I'm currently living at home with my parents, but I am saving up to get an apartment and live on my own. I really want to move out and be more independent, but I do also want to move out because there are times when I cannot stand to be in the same room as my parents, particularly my mom. This is in part to do with the fact that I've heard them having sex multiple times while growing up. I never got to talk from them. They're pretty Catholic. They're not super

strict, but I guess they just never wanted to have the talk with me. And I also never wanted to bring up the topic of sex or anything about sex because I always felt judged or like super uncomfortable. So yeah, when I was growing up, I'd hear them and it obviously made me uncomfortable, but it also made me very angry. And the fact that they would do that, even though I was in the room right beside them and this anger has kind of stuck with me over the years. Fast forward to last month, my parents and I went on vacation to the West Coast to visit some family. At our Airbnb one morning, my dad was doing the dishes. I was sitting on the couch on my phone and I heard weird noise. So I kind of stopped what I was doing and like paid a bit more attention.

And I realized I heard my mom in the bedroom moaning quite loudly multiple times. And so obviously one can assume she was masturbating. It wasn't as if she was trying to be conspicuous or anything. She was quite loud. My blood started to boil and my heart started to pound really fast. and I was just so pissed because I know that I would never want my parents of all people to hear me masturbating or having sex with someone in the room beside them. I've heard friends having sex in the room beside me and that's never made me feel this type of anger. I know that compared to other people my age, I am quite inexperienced sexually. I do masturbate frequently and I'm not closed off about having sex. I've just had some weird encounters with guys in the past year, so I'm

just trying to do me right now. And you know what? I am obviously happy that they still love each other and they're still in tune with their sexual side. And I hope that when I'm their age, I'll still be in tune with my body and my sexual side. But it still just makes me so mad that they don't even have the decency to hide it a little bit more when I'm around. There's also been times where family or friends will bring up the topic of sex and my mom will always say, oh, don't say that in front of Veronica. She gets embarrassed. And that makes me really actually embarrassed because I'm worried that people will think I'm an immature child. And it's not actually the topic of sex. It's just my parents having sex in that image. There was this one time that someone asked

my mom about her and my dad, and she said how my dad had to go over onto her side of the bed to have sex with her so they wouldn't disrupt the dog in the middle of the bed. And she said that right in front of me, which made me really weird, like feel weird because obviously it's my parents and they sleep two rooms over from where I sleep. And this image now is just burned into my mind. So is this bad of me to be getting so upset and so angry when I can hear them? Am I being approved by getting uncomfortable when i hear them i need any and all advice because i'm just worried that when this happens again because i know it's going to happen again that i'm just going to get all worked up and crazy angry again you should please help me okay i'm super fucking

sex positive but that's it's crossing a line when i was in high school oh no my parents room was directly above your sisters listen to this podcast they know this okay they know thursday night was sex night i would hear them having sex and so i brought it up to them i'm just gonna say that's what you should do yeah that's what you should do i would be like hey i can hear y'all boning so like don't or or what i would i actually did was like i knew it was thursday night that's when that was bone time leave some condoms on there so i would go and my mom had a hysterectomy so that wasn't happening i would go and just sit on on the computer in like the other room so then i didn't hear them yeah so i think you should just tell them yeah yeah i mean

i think that's the way to do it because i think like it is just it's just a weird it's they're talking about sex in front of you but like they're they are being like oh she gets embarrassed about it but yeah it's just it's dancing around the subject and that's not no like and i think like you often like they have needs and i think it's great you're trying to be positive about it you're so happy that they are still doing that kind of stuff but like there is a sense of i don't know it's like the same thing like i think smoking weed as a parent in states where it's legal like you do it but there's also a league like if you think about sex there's like a a legal age an age of consent essentially so if you've been hearing this your whole life

like it's one of those things like yeah you're not gonna smoke weed in front of your kids it's legal it's not legal for them yet but like there is a sense of yeah kind of keep yeah maybe they don't know that they you can hear them yeah how many siblings do you have if they're boning so much she didn't mention maybe he got up a sec one of them one of them got their stuff yeah their stuff all tied up and they're just going going to pound town i mean i think you you have to say something and i think it's totally valid and fine to be angry i think it's i i think i was questioning before i was like well what's like the pissed off like anger about and i think it's yeah it feels disrespectful yeah it feels like these are my parents i would never do this to

disrespect them and yeah and also she knows that her parents would feel incredibly disrespected if she did that in their house and they're not it's not the same thing back maybe they're trying to get you to move out maybe i would if you're not gonna move out and you know you know they're frisky get some good noise canceling headphones yeah i would write a note and just be like like when they're fucking put a post-it note on the door slip it under the door be like i can hear you they're not gonna pay attention no but so when they're done and they walk out they see it so if you don't feel i think you can write them a note and it doesn't have to be long it can then if she writes the note while they're boning and then goes

and slips into the door. She's like, right there. No, you plug your ears while you do it. Okay. Get those headphones. Yeah, I think you say something and I don't think it needs to be... I mean, yeah. Hi, I love you guys so much. I'm so happy you guys... You don't have to do all of that. They're clearly okay with talking about

sex in front of you. Yeah. So, yeah. Just tell them. Yeah. And, yeah. If you feel awkward, write a note and then noise-canceling headphones. And then start looking for an apartment. Ugh. oh i yeah this is not this is not cool for me i'm just like whatever i've lived through it oh it's gross but like once things are said and you make a solution you move on with your life yeah

and hopefully you'll be embarrassed and they'll like settle down a bit yeah i just i can't even imagine masturbating masturbating an airbnb like one room away yeah but and but her dad was in the same room with her i know that's so weird it's funny though and also i wonder how catholic they are because isn't it like you only have sex to produce children so is that in the words of league of elwood's legally blonde child abandonment every time oh i mean it's not for a woman because you're not see but you know i mean yeah i got you wow i i really feel really bad for you i'm really sorry and it sounds like you might be an only child my parents broke a bed i don't need to know that like a few days like when i went home for christmas i was like this bed is broken it

was actually two beds get it one of them's the guest bed that i had to sleep in and the other one was reminded in their room was broken as well so i think they broke the one in the room and i was just like this is gross but then my dad had somebody come fix the bed and that was it and i had them flip the mattress wait so did you tell your parents you could hear them yeah what'd they do they kind of like they laughed it off yeah actually i didn't tell my dad i just told my mom because my dad would have flipped his shit yeah yeah i just told my mom and she was like you're right melissa and i was like no i really can't were they quite a little bit quieter yeah but it was more like the mattress was squeaking so you

can't quiet that down i like can't imagine yeah i've only ever heard friends having sex what's up i told you the story about how i was on the top bunk bed where my friend was fucking the dude on the bottom you were on the bottom swing we were on the top swing like yeah it takes like a while to realize who it is that she's fucking you're like gross hi man so i am 20 and i've been in an on and off relationship kind of with a guy who's 26 for about a year um we have a really good time together and we're really enjoying him um we say that we love each other and all this normal relationship stuff but um he is very weird about social media and um doesn't want to be friends on social media doesn't want to show anything about us on social media and like i

said we've been off and on for about a year so um I don't quite know why we've been off and on he is an alcoholic so sometimes he goes on binges and disappears so I guess that's part of the reason but I feel like he's kind of ashamed of me um I haven't met his mom yet and he's told me that it's because he thinks that his mom will offend me by the things that she says because i'm super sensitive and all of these sorts of excuses and i just can't tell if he's taking me very seriously so as a result of that i've been kind of um going off on the side a little bit and just i don't want to say fucking around but fucking around and sometimes i feel guilty but then i think about how i feel like he hypes me and i've confronted him about it and it just gets

nowhere so i don't know if i should just continue it he graduates college in december so um i don't know like if i should think of a future if i should just go with the flow i know this is kind of it doesn't really make any sense it's a whole bunch of things i don't have time to explain but any advice would be great thank you bye we're gonna have different opinions on this really have you not been did you not see the tiktok um i've been looking why you ain't posting me oh i get it you don't want your other hoes to see it's the tiktok you are a side hoe nobody knows who i'm dating until i've broken up with them i don't ever post who i'm dating on social media and i don't want them on social media he doesn't want to be friends on social media yeah i don't

want that either you don't want to follow your boyfriend nope you don't want to follow your boyfriend on social media nope that's not true no that is 100 true but the one i'm thinking of you guys had followed each other prior yeah but like because you were friends first yeah we were friends first that's the only reason you don't even you wouldn't but is your instagram public yeah so then there you go so his definitely isn't unless that's doing it because that's the whole thing i think he doesn't want you to see what's going on there and i think i i i don't think you would have yeah i would assume she wouldn't have an yeah do you mean yeah also you're normal and chill yeah and also it you would be defining the relationship and all of that stuff

so social so not being a fit not like posting each other on social media that wouldn't be the one of many things that would be the only thing yeah yeah yeah my friend um is married to her husband and she they don't they're not friends with each other on facebook or any social media she doesn't post about i am on instagram she'll post their kids but she doesn't post about him yep okay but do you think this guy is like i don't know him i'm just saying for me and i'm giving like i don't like posting about my significant other on social media and i don't want to know what they're doing on social media and i don't want them to know what i'm doing but they can like it's open i just don't want them to follow me okay i think that's valid i think that's fine

because also that's not hiding it's not hiding but like i want to have like i don't want him to like i'm not the type of person that like sits and posts on instagram story all day but when i was on facebook i would like post what i was doing all day yeah and then then it just like makes it so we don't really have anything to talk about later so i'd prefer to have the mystery there so then we have stuff to talk about okay okay no i think that's valid i mean i didn't post mods for i didn't for a year over i think over a year i think we were dating for like a year and like three four months before i ever posted anything about us being like us together or whatever and i think we became friends on facebook last year year before last maybe two years ago so that part

i understand i think that this is all sort of red flags for me and i think that's the part i think that's just part of it and i think like there are exceptions to the rule of if like your significant other because i don't think it's posting i don't give a shit about like if you're posting you're sick of me or not but it's i don't want you to follow me i don't want any of that stuff in conjunction like paired with the fact that every time you try and bring up like a future and talking about something he completely shuts it down he goes off the grid you don't hear from him for all this sort of time you haven't met his like family and all that i think you're i think you're the i think you're a side hoe and i think and you're not a hoe but i think like that's

there is no like you've been doing this for enough time that like when you say i want to think about do i should i think about a future this is the future this is what's happening this is what it is like are you cool with this because nothing's changed and i if he had any desire to change that and him i think him ghosting ghosting and resurfacing from a serial ghoster ghosting and resurfacing if if he's not back burnering you and being like if he really cares about you and it's like hey i'm so sorry i'm like going through some stuff right now i kind of need to pull back i don't want you to take this as i'm not interested in you and all of that sort of stuff like he's not worried what you think like if he just like disappears and that sort of stuff

and i understand like you say like he's an alcoholic and it might have something to do with that um I I understand that aspect but I think it would also that would be a conversation after if he's in recovery and it's something like if he's in if he's like going to AA and doing all that stuff if he's and maybe he's going to AA and he doesn't he shouldn't not in a relationship but should be I don't know I think that's all exception to the rule I think the most likely thing here is that he isn't really taking you seriously and that's what you said you're i don't know if he is treating this seriously i don't think he is i think we'll we get i get labeled as ageist all the time but a 26 year old with a 20 year old i mean he's in college like

he's like fuck yeah i get to date these like hot young things are you in college too i think they go to college together okay yeah i just think if he wanted to be serious and actually date you he would have and this like cat and mouse back and forth ghost resurface ghost resurface i i think anytime someone resurfaces after ghosting without an explanation it's not a good one that's the reason why they're not giving it to you i agree with that because we're ghosters i don't resurface i don't either like if i ghost you i'm done done but that's also because i'm choosing to ghost you but if he's ghosting because hey he's got a girlfriend hey he's got a wife like he's got something like that he doesn't get to choose when he's ghosting it's like oh shit i have to pull

back no contact come back with no explanation or a shitty one at that if you don't buy it then i think yeah it's it's so much more than that and he's shown you this and i think you should not feel guilty for like sleeping around because i think he's probably doing that too and also and then also even to play even if he's not whatever you're doing it so yeah and and even if he's not he's clearly doesn't want a relationship right now and if he wants one eventually who knows if he'll want one with you and it's not on you to like wait for him through all of that like live your life peace him the fuck out he's leaving he's graduating you're still gonna be at school be done yeah watch the tiktok um and say bye-bye

i get it you don't want your other hoes to see i've been how does it fucking start never heard it hey megan so i have it's kind of a weird story not that weird actually um so i've been hooking up with this guy for like a few months now it's fine like have fun hooking up with him but it's definitely nothing more than that I don't have feelings don't think he has feelings anyway um I happened to get an invitation to my cousin's wedding that is in March so the invitation was just sitting on my dresser in my bedroom and he happened to see it and I got a plus one I'm just I guess because I'm her cousin I don't know got a plus one I'm not in a relationship have not been in a relationship in a very long time it kind of caught me off guard and I wasn't

planning to bring anyone because it's a family wedding whatever and he made a comment like oh I love weddings did you get a plus one and I was like yeah actually I did haha like but don't have any plans to bring anyone and he's like well if you need to if you want to bring someone I'm happy to go and i like laughed about it because i was just like we just like hook up in the darkness of night like and then i clear head i was like you know that's like my cousin's wedding like my whole family will be there extended relatives everyone and he's like yes so what and like i guess for him it wouldn't be as weird as me bringing a boy around because it'd really be the first like boy i brought around in like an adult life besides like a high school boyfriend

and now I'm like thinking like is it weird if I did bring him because the wedding would definitely be more fun for me if I had like a buddy there but at the same time it's a family wedding and I'm just not sure if I need to introduce this boy to my whole family and then be like no he's just a friend but then like I don't I just don't know how it would all go down in person and not that like my family would judge me but it would just be a bit of a weird situation to be around and then I'd be asked about him forever and like can just tell him I'm like oh no we just hooked up and you know we're pals so if you think I should bring him or shouldn't bring him or anything let me know I'm obviously not going to make any decision on whether I bring him around

until it's way closer to the wedding because it's four months away and we're just hooking up and who knows if that would even really still be happening then but any advice you give would be great thanks bye don't bring him nope hell no unless like it seems like he likes you though no it seems like he likes weddings i don't know no he seems like he likes weddings they're they're young so there's not a lot they haven't had a lot i fucking love weddings now i don't just loves weddings oh my god i know so i'm sorry wedding crashers there's a whole fucking movie about it the whole point of them going was because they were trying to fuck people weddings are fun and maybe he's hasn't been to a ton and like or just he just really i think it's it's a it's a party

it's literally a party with an open bar with this girl that you're fucking and like music and fun and like it is fun and also we don't think weddings are fun now because we've been to so many i enjoy weddings but i'm just like i i'd never would want to go to a wedding with a fuck buddy where it's their like family members wedding yeah like if it was a friend yeah or if it was 100%. You've got 15 cousins. It's the 15th fucking cousin. And you're fucking done?

Yeah, bring him. Yeah, but not at the family wedding where everybody's going to be asking about him and how are you going to introduce him. What if he does something weird that embarrasses you? You guys are going to go fuck in the coat closet. Yeah. No. Yeah, I think it just gives me, there's a huge potential for the ex

where you're just going to go and what if he gets really drunk? What if he does something embarrassing that you don't like and you're like oh and it kind of does reflect on you like do you know him other than fucking him like do you know him as a person yeah and if he was your best friend yeah but then at the same time you'd be dating right i yeah i just say no i think like it is gonna be so much more effort than it's worth and it's gonna be one night for you guys and for him but it's gonna be like the next like three fucking years for you and like what if you start dating someone like right after and like you introduce him to your family and your parents like whatever happened to that other guy

and you're like just fucking yeah and i would also say it's i um know someone who was and they were dating not boyfriend girlfriend but was dating this girl and uh they he very early on got a plus one to a wedding invited her and it was like maybe like two months into them like dating or like hooking up and i think if they were just hooking up at that point he invited her and then flash fast forward the wedding was maybe four months later he fucking hated her and he was waiting to like break things off till after the wedding because he's like i can't like already plane tickets done all of this kind of stuff and the issue was is being the plus one to the wedding she took that as wow this is a really like he likes me this is a step it's serious this isn't

too far in advance i don't think no but i know i don't think but i'm saying you're saying you wouldn't decide now yeah yeah but it's just too much that's just too much no i think if you're gonna bring a fuck buddy you invite them the day before yeah like it's and i don't think you can because it's a family wedding invited himself essentially yeah i just think no no it's just not gonna be more fun for you no i think it's so much more you're gonna have fun with your family yeah what if because everybody at weddings is just thinking about the next wedding like yeah they're already marrying people off and then people are gonna be like oh you're next and then they're gonna be like here catch the bouquet and he can catch the garter what if your cousin has

like a really like hot single friend yeah or a cousin that's not your cousin yeah like a groomsman you know like yeah i just say no to a family wedding no i think friend wedding yeah destination wedding for a friend what no i would say for a friend wedding if you need like if you're going somewhere like more alone strictly just fuck buddy yeah but if you've friends with them that you complicate things yeah no i just don't think i just don't think it's it's worth it at all me either and you guys you guys might stop hooking up in like a short amount of time and also the issue is is he would need to potentially get a plane ticket get a tux do all of that kind of stuff so like you can't even really do it like last last last minute and also like have fun with

your cousins like your single cousins would be like bitch what what did you do this for and also you can just tell him if you like don't want to if you don't want to like hurt his feelings you can also be like oh so i talked to my cousin and like turns out i got a plus one as a mistake like family doesn't get plus ones which is typical you know and like what if he like gets in the pictures oh yeah that too i mean and like you've all these pictures of you in a bridesmaid's dress with him and it's like oh yeah this is this dude i fucked one time or like a couple times yeah i just think it's no weird what'd she say under the cover of the night yeah yeah what if you see him in the daylight and he's like not hot it's like darkwing duck yeah

i just like can imagine it just being cringe like he just does something and you're like oh i hate that and then that ruins him like for your fucking too and then you like see him on campus and like you like and he's like such a fun time we had at that wedding you're like ew why did i bring you to my cousin's wedding like why were you there watching my cousin get married yeah weird weird weird i think he wants to be serious you do i feel like he just might love weddings i think he wants to be serious a family wedding maybe he's socially inept if it was just a friend wedding i get it but he wants to go to a family wedding where he knows he's going to be introduced to all these family members maybe he does yeah i mean i think it's a total possibility i think

it's a 50 50 chance he either likes her or he just like thinks he's being a like doing a solid of being like you've got a plus one hey if you need one before he even like he was like do you do you have a plus one like he asked her he wants to go to this wedding i don't know why i think he just really likes anybody just like likes weddings like that like enough to go with their fuck buddy to their family wedding i would though with a fuck buddy to their family wedding where you know you're getting introduced to everybody so the only wedding i had gone to up until recently was my godmother got married i was a flower girl i loved it i loved it so much yes okay and i wanted to go to a wedding so bad so if i had a fuck buddy who like had a wedding i would have been like

can i come i pretty much did it to matzah's brother's wedding i like invite i was like am i gonna come with you to this wedding granted we were dating right different story yeah we weren't dating for that long you've known each other though yeah we're only dating for three months and i how long did you know each other before like a year and a half exactly it's a different story yeah and it would be awkward because i am in some pictures yeah he wants to lock it down find out if he does though and let us know if he isn't too i'd be curious or if he really likes weddings i think you're probably right but i kind of want to be right okay guys it's time for a quick break and we will be right back

namaste okay everybody we are back from our break did you miss us no wow fuck you play the next call hi megan and melissa and guests so i kind of have a weird situation going on i have been dating through oh i'm 19 by the way i'm in college right now um i i've been dating through tinder and fumble pretty much recently which is new for me but over the last couple months but i started consistently talking to this guy over probably the last month and a half and we like started sleeping together pretty fast on even though that wasn't really the end goal I understand like how my dating kind of results in that but um so here's the problem he is has the biggest dick I have ever seen like I'm not saying it's like out of this planet or

anything but it's like a good like almost eight inches or so and like I'm I'm tall but I'm like a petite girl like I have a pretty small pelvis and so what happened was he actually blew a disc in my back so he partially tore a disc between two of my vertebrae in my back um I'm really into this guy and it's honestly some of the best sex I've ever had in my life like he makes me come like crazy and I've never come from any guy I've slept with um that's not the reason I'm really staying with him I like him a lot as a person and everything but I'm like he literally blew a disc in my back I'm trying to just I don't really know what my question is as far as like I guess I'm just trying to figure out if it's worth it for me to keep trying to have sex with him and like be

with him and see what can happen but I'm kind of scared that it's gonna happen again or something similar might happen um i didn't even feel it when it actually happened it was more like a couple days after uh i didn't like him and i'm really confused and i don't know what to do so if you could please give me some advice that would be so helpful thank you i love a podcast i love you bye question i am i wrong in thinking that sounds much more to do with position than it does it's 100 position because you can fuck a pregnant lady and you don't fucking hit the kid with your dick it's position yeah also you're the nursing student you tell us what to do true bitch you're in school for this yeah this sounds like a position thing to me and like if his like like

i'm thinking of like he's he's getting at you from behind and his hand is on your back and then that do what i mean yeah like it's the movement of his like him fucking you and then the movement of his hand it it has to it has to be something like yeah it i would say get on top because first of all that's your back is gonna be straight yeah but you know when she's on top she's taking it all no not necessarily because she could be up on her knees and she can control the depth okay well quads are gonna be it's gonna be burning you need to go start going to pilates or if you have him hold your ass and then he moves you up and down too practice with some wall sits yeah yeah you gotta work on your core and your back strength oh and you can also put a pillow you can put a pillow

and then fuck him yeah on top yeah you could go big spoon little spoon yeah don't do it from the back don't do it from the back because that's you can do you can be against the wall thing you can't go anywhere or headboard yeah and also if you can also like you know grab his balls when he's like engage other parts of his penis so they're not all inside of you yeah and what we need to know position it has to it's position it's not the size of his dick because we measured my fuck buddy he literally had a smart water smart water bottle for a penis i mean it wasn't like like the good place where he has like uh wind chimes but it was like i'm waddling after but it didn't break my back yeah do you know what i mean it was like my vagina is position and um motion yeah yeah it has

to be because you could have he could have just been like in you all the way and then just like rotating but he was banging it in there because i dislodged a disc in my back from falling down stairs yeah and nothing was inside of me yeah do you like yep there it has to be an outside force um if you tell him this he'll be i don't know if he knows he'd be so flattered he'd be like i blew your back out i wore that ass out um don't take it up the ass oh my god my asshole clenched so tight i oh oh that my colon felt that everyone's been like aware of my colon now i am holy shit um fuck that got me good i yeah i think you you and also i think fuck buddies

fuck buddies like instructionally sex wise it can kind of just tend to be more of like a rough and tumble whatever happens and you just have to bam thank you yeah and sometimes talking about it like kind of like defeats the purpose of a fuck buddy but you just I would just say and you can even do it in the moment if like you start to feel some things off and just be in tune with your body and like where his hands are because I care how like someone's fucking from behind

and their hands are on your lower back or whatever and you're like no no you can't there's too much weight here. You gotta arch that ass up too. If you're putting your hand on me Yeah it's too much. I'm because you're moving I'm not moving but every part of you is moving and you're shifting lots of shit in me. Unless you're

the one moving and he's being still too. that's what i mean if i'm fucking pinned down no no i know i'm saying like different different motion oh yeah this is a different motion can we um pull the room i won't say who else in the room but there's someone here that has serious back problems no her face i literally the whole time i was like her worst nightmare yeah so like do you have any um position recommendations to be honest i haven't had sex in a year and a half okay fuck my back but yeah i would say on your back though right most likely on my back i don't think on the back oh i don't think yeah if you've got a that's not good okay that's why i was saying she needs to be up on top if she can

control the motion that would be the best because she knows what hurts and what doesn't she apparently doesn't though um well now she's doing it she knows like what yeah shift hurts so like when they're doing it whatever she can do yeah control the motion and yeah the hands on the back that's gonna fuck you up yeah if his hands are like i know i hate when people's hands are on my stomach but like if her his hands are on her stomach and kind of lifting yeah like pelvis up that'll help support yeah and a pillow i think if she had a pillow under her ass and she's riding him yeah whatever support she can give to her lower back is yeah i think that's what yeah yeah yeah and then also if if we're back brace wait do we know what where in her bot where the like is it a up

top or she didn't say yeah so i would say if it's up and up top one don't have him pull your hair like oh yeah keep your net like don't fuck with any next sort of shit but yeah um but just tell him and just be and you can even bring it up like in a funny way it's like hey so congratulations i have something for your tombstone um you dislodge like you broke my back you broke my from us fucking it's like hey i'm hella i'm still super down to hook up with you but like we just it must have been good to go back for it and say that we just got to choreograph it and then he'll just be aware because i think that's the whole thing it's like you weren't aware in the moment because you were enjoying yourself and neither was he but if you guys are both a little more like cognizant of

it of being like oh this is not feeling this is gonna hurt it um well best of luck uh if anyone is in the medical field and has any she's in the medical field well clearly she's still a nursing teacher she's still a nursing student ask your teacher she's thankfully she's still in school yeah you've got some more to learn let us know when the curriculum gets to is sexually and injuries um you can watch uh uh sex sent me to the er is that the name of that show yeah if anyone has any good stories about sex um health like sending them to any crazy things we'd love to know 100 we still love learning about how you know dicks can rip and all that shit there's a certain angle that your partner knows more than you do yeah so you're like i can only see so much with a hand

mirror so yeah you use a full-size mirror just no fuck no i just use my i always just use my phone and i'm like i hope again i never can take any pictures you know that your fbi agent that's checking in on you yeah he's seeing if my used infections cleared up or not it's the only time ever looking at being like am i still am i good is this working hey megan um i'm 22 years old and I don't live in Alabama, but get ready to hear some Alabama ass shit. So I lost my virginity two years ago, late in the game to my stepbrother. It was consensual. We were both adults, and the whole story is too much to tell you right now,

but he did start it. And because we did everything together from sharing a room to a car, we spent all our time together, and I caught feelings for him. um our parents found out about us sleeping together the same day that I found out I was pregnant and they kicked us out of the house um they never knew that I got knocked up and I went to the doctor and got that taken care of but my brother moved far away and every time we see each other we still sleep together and I've talked to other guys but I can't get over him he's all that I ever think about when I'm talking to anyone else and it's hard to cut him off because my

family's super intertwined and we have to communicate sometimes last time I saw him his dad told him he thinks I'm in love with my stepbrother and he's right but I know nothing could ever come of it my stepbrother is talking to a girl right now that he really likes and we get along well I'm super sad because I don't want to lose him and I just want advice on how to get over him without cutting him off as he is coming for Christmas and nothing is holding me back from sleeping with him again even though I know I shouldn't so I need to figure out how to cut that off because I know it's going to be hard once he gets once he starts dating this girl that he's talking to right now um if you have any advice just let me know i know this is a weird situation

um but thanks this is a situation um you have to go to therapy also and i say that because also you made it really you stressed very early on that like it was consensual i you didn't specify the age difference which is incredibly important they were sharing a room though so i would think and a car in a car so they're probably the same age yeah i i i will say i'm i'm impressed that you referred to this as some alabama type shit yeah there's a self-awareness there um this is yeah i mean to like go all therapist-y on you i think you do need to go see a therapist because this isn't

it's it's it's the same sort of thing that developing feelings for like like if we're gonna okay sure gossip girl like serena and dan technically like there is a relationship established there before and we've had people who've called in who've like they've been dating and then their parent if their parents start dating and all of that sort of stuff but there's something else going on how long were you guys siblings before this happened no she just said that they were like living they like sharing a car and they she ended up falling for him how long like have you guys been step siblings since you were six or have you been step siblings since you were 15 oh that's a good point yeah because that changes the dynamic in

the situation because if it's since you were six that means you were raised as just like siblings i would if it was a couple years ago then yeah that changes i would assume it was a couple years ago i would think if you were raised as kids together your parents wouldn't have kicked you you know i mean i think it would have been a she did slip up and just say he was her brother at one point yeah and say step brother dude you gotta go to therapy like this is you have to work this is this isn't i hate to i don't want to ever say something like oh this isn't normal but there is like a certain level and like i even think like reflect on my own life when there's certain things like getting yourself into certain situations or you end up somewhere and you're like i my friends

don't this hasn't happened to my friends yeah why does this why has this happened to me and life obviously happens to you on occasion without your control but you you end up in some places and you're like why what did i do yeah and i'm just like if it was like 16 you're hormonal and you're in the same room with a person of the opposite sex i can see that but if it's been like longer than that there's other issues going on here not issues but other concerns that you should maybe speak to speak about with a therapist but like i also think even to be fair even if it was you were just teenagers if you're 16 i don't want to say the term you know better but there is something that that's your like i would think it would need to be young enough that it's it doesn't feel weird

but like you know better quote unquote but like it's almost like getting away with like the perfect thing because you're 16 getting to share a room with somebody so weird when you're yeah you're right you're like sneak it's like you don't have to sneak around you've got that built-in person that's in the same room with you already yeah but i mean i think whatever it is like there's something that you need to work through which is why you did this and why but and i mean and i'm only and I would say the exact same thing to him if he was calling like that there yeah it's it's not yeah it's like are you in love with him because you say you caught feelings but then you didn't confirm the feelings that your stepdad said that you were in love with him I don't think you are

and I don't think to be totally honest I don't think in this situation you can be I think this is so much bigger than him and i think like you go it's i think if you compare it on a lighter note to like really really really like 14 year old girls who are in states with like 14 the age of consent who fall in love and marry six-year-old men like that's it's there's there's a reason behind it like there's something that's either you've dealt with as a child or there's some unrepressed like undealt with trauma there's there's something or just how your brain is like going through and processing uh decision making and that is something that's like a huge thing that happens as a teenager like your frontal like your frontal lobes aren't fully developed

till you're 25 but also that's that's you don't know that you're if your frontal lobes are going to develop until you're 25 and if they haven't and like that's a whole other aspect of evaluating of being like okay where are you like yeah where's your rational decision making at and i think like if you were 16 and it was super hormonally charged and all of that stuff i still just think like you would there would need to have been a reason and something else that would have been able to get you there as opposed to being like oh my god my fucking stupid stepbrother like he's so annoying or like we're gonna be friends but yeah and i also i yeah i i think i would just i think it needs to be unpacked a lot more because also if you were 16 and your parents are having you guys

share a room i understand like financial struggles if that's not possible but at the same time i would feel i would feel kind of not taken care of and i wouldn't feel necessarily safe if i hadn't known this kid before and suddenly i'm having to like share a room and share all this like intimate stuff with another teenage boy that i don't know and i would kind of feel yeah you don't really feel like safe um and even if that's just again all not it's not at the front of your mind it's all subconscious sort of stuff um but i don't think it's a process of getting over him i think it's a process of going to therapy talking to a professional and being like how did i end up in this situation and like what can i do to work on myself and understand myself

more so i can take care of myself because i think that's the issue like it's it this resulted in an unplanned pregnancy which then also resulted in you getting kicked out of your house like the your decision making irrational decision making skills right now are putting you in danger up with them yeah and this is and that to say that to say i think it would be i think you need some help in figuring out how to read your own cues and read those things that you're drawn to so you can protect yourself in situations so you don't end up in a like incredibly dangerous situation because you haven't been able to prevent that before like this isn't necessarily quote unquote dangerous but getting kicked out as like a younger person that's that's a lot that's having

to fend for yourself and doing all this kind of stuff i think it's you need to figure that out because it's not getting over a crush it's like processing you can't just get over him because he's going to be he's part of your family he's not going anywhere so you've got to get professional help and also if that also means that sometimes you spend uh if there's a family reunion or something you bring a friend as a buffer or you don't attend you you keep that distance and separation because you're this is i again if there was there's i don't think i think you're right i don't think there's a big age difference but say like say that there were regardless of it both of you participated in this and both of you have whatever you're dealing with and whatever

led you here he's dealt with something might not be the same thing but that has also led him to that point so if you're going to work on healing and figuring yourself out you don't know that he's doing that so you need to separate yourself from him from for as much as possible because that's not what does your mom say about all this well that's the part that makes me worried is because if she if the response if both of your if their response was just to kick you out that to me is like and they didn't even know you were pregnant how did they find out they i would assume they caught them yeah hooking up but yeah i just think i think there's stuff there that because here's the thing like you you have to deal with this because he's not going to be able to bring a

girl around and you're not going to be able to bring a guy around because it's going like it's gonna neither unless you until both of you deal with this and the only person you control is you so until you process this and go through this and figure this out and like go on that journey of therapy and all of that stuff you're you're not gonna be able to bring a boyfriend home and being like yeah this is my stepbrother we used to hook up sort of a thing because like there you need yeah you just need to figure your stuff out and i think it it probably won't be quick but this isn't no it's not a nor like it's not a typical like how do i get over a crush and a boy because there's so much more to it and you only get yourself in those incredibly sticky

situations and i don't want to like liken it to like an abusive relationship but getting over an abusive relationship that's not just like how do i get over my like my ex-boyfriend it's like there is something involved that is it's just i ended up in a really terrible situation and i need to be able to trust my own judgment and my instincts to prevent myself from being in another place like that and it's obviously no one's like it's not it's the only person who's at fault is an abuser in that case but there is some sort of checking in with yourself to figuring out like how do i break this cycle of this kind of stuff because i think if you don't and you just like get over it you're going to get into like an equally sticky really not kosher sort of relationship um on a

lighter note we've got an update we've got an update i mean it's lighter but not light but it's a good one it's a good one okay i'm nervous now and it's really it's from like a long long time ago okay you ready yeah i'm nervous now now i don't trust anything hi megan so recently i this is really random but I just wanted you to know um I remembered that a few years ago I had called in and asked for some advice and you guys actually answered my question and it was crazy and so I was like I really want to find that episode again so I've been listening to all your episodes because I kind of remember which one it was I finally just found it it was from November 24th 2017 and it was with Lily Marston and I called in because I was 16 or 17 and I just

started this job and I found this girl really attractive but I lived in Kansas at the time so I like and I had grown up in Kansas so I was like no this is not good and this I had like forced homophobia on me because my family and everything and obviously just the people around me I went to I lived in a small town just like you guys were talking about and you know the advice you gave back then you know I kind of just took it in and I was like yeah that's great advice but I don't think I'll ever use it because I was scared but then I eventually a few years later decided to move to Colorado and I went to college here or I'm in college here and everyone's so open and now I'm 20 that call was four years ago I think and I have come out as bisexual I have told everyone

I love you know every every person I date knows I'm bi and I don't know just listening back to that you guys are really awesome and you gave really great advice and little 16 year old me like I'm crying I'm almost gonna cry I'm gonna make myself not just thinking about it because you were like the first person I even felt comfortable enough to talk to about that and now you know it's just many years later I just remembered that you guys actually answered my call and it's just really cool what you guys are doing you know and your Facebook group I'm a part of that and it's like a little girl community a woman community and I just like it a lot and it's really cool because I don't have many people to talk to I obviously didn't have many people to

talked to back then either so i just want to say thank you and i'm really glad that i found the episode and i'm really glad that i'm comfortable in my sexuality now and my family reaction's fine they didn't really make a big deal out of it and you die and everything's just different now so thank you guys so much i love your podcast bye oh my god that is so fucking cute dude i'm so happy for her oh my god and you're i'm sure you're listening because you're part of our facebook groups like you you listen that is crazy i never even thought of i mean i didn't even realize i've been doing the podcast for four years but then when you think about it in age wise 16 to 20 that's those are formidable years yeah that is a big big jump that's fucking amazing and literally

when you were saying like you moved to colorado we were like hell yeah colorado hell again yeah that's a great there's a great queer community there oh this is that's amazing i'm so fucking happy for you and that's so sweet i can't believe we were like the first people that you're oh wow not to make this about me but feeling special but like this is so exciting it is and just like yeah i think it's amazing like that jump and i think like the last couple updates have a lot of been have been like that age jump from like i went from a teen to i went away to college and it's such i mean i had a terrible college experience but i think if you like if you are in like a small town or from like a very whether like a religious community or anything like that you're able to

like meet so many more people in college like who knows you might be like hey i'm gonna come out hey i'm gonna watch porn now all that stuff that's amazing that gave me a warm fuzzy feeling inside it does it's hard to give me that feeling oh i will so sweet so sweet what a good way to around this episode yeah wow what a journey we've been on guys um it took some turns that we didn't anticipate yeah definitely thought it was gonna be uh a lot more light-hearted than it ended up being no that's on me for um thinking that's what i keep telling you to think yeah you thought it was gonna be light-hearted That's what you get for thinking.

That's true. That's what I get for thinking and not doing work. Yeah. So if you guys enjoyed this episode and you want to give us a call for an upcoming one. Please someone call if you've had experience with your step-sibling. Because I think it happens more often than not. It's a big... It happened to Clueless.

Yeah. But they didn't know each other until they were older. Yeah. She'd had a couple step-moms before that. I remember her dad had dated other people. But like... they weren't sharing a room. They weren't sharing a car.

We don't know if Shaver got pregnant. We do, because they had the series that came on later. No, but I mean, in 90 minutes, she wasn't pregnant. Right. But then they did the movie that picked up after... I mean, the TV show that picked up after the movie. With Alicia Silverstone? elisa silverstone but everybody else was it was in it but elisa silverstone wasn't it was dion in

it crazy lady yeah she was crazy but everybody else was in it holy shit yeah paul rudd no he wasn't oh it was somebody else so we don't know if they had again did we but it was his character was there oh my god they just recapped yeah wow they broke up because she was still in high she was 16 when that happened she was still in high school he was in college so of course when they made the tv series they were like can't have her date in a college yeah they break up yeah so they broke up so no kid i'm trying to think of other movies where it's happened it's a big life with derek it's a big okay but that's disgusting like cruel intentions is like truly like it is you don't watch that and go oh i want to do that but it's a big category on pornhub yeah

i mean it is kind of like life with derrick except it was disney channel and it was weird because like you would ship they were step siblings and you were like oh my god they're so cute they're flirting and like it wasn't until i became an adult that i was like why was i and like it's not like the shit like they never kissed they weren't each other's romantic interest but there was like a sexual undertone of the whole show and there were rumors that the two actors it's literally a disney channel show and there's rumors that the two actors were hooking up and that's why like it was there but like yeah it was like you wanted them to like get together and then it was like they're siblings they're step siblings if you guys want to be on an upcoming

episode uh give us a call at 310-694-0976 and international listeners you can send us an audio message at meganpodcast.gmail.com you can follow uh us our socials are listed down below as well as the podcast don't blah meme pod if you guys want to listen ad free check us out on stitcher premium we also have the youtube uh the video version on youtube and then and if wherever you're listening to it audio wise if you want to leave us a nice review tell us how cute we are we'd love it i'm gonna burp goodbye bye don't blame me is a production by me executive produced by melissa demonts Camera operator Amanda Lechner.

And music by Ryan Hunter and Giacomo Picasso, part of the HerPod Network.