Don't Blame Me! - S5E15: Guest: Joslyn Davis - My Boyfriend’s Son Called Me Mom

Episode Date: March 9, 2020

Joslyn Davis is back once again to share advice! This week we're answer your questions on:   Toxic Friendships Commitment Issues Pyramid Schemes Sharing Your Faith With Your Partner   And in Don't Blame Them a listener shares her advice about parents having sex.   Join our PRIVATE Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/dbmsecretgroup  You must answer all questions correctly to be approved!   Follow Us! @meghanrienks www.instagram.com/meghanrienks  @joslyndavis https://www.instagram.com/joslyndavis/ @dontblameme  https://www.instagram.com/dontblamemepod/ @sheisnotmelissa www.instagram.com/sheisnotmelissa     Listen to ad-free on Stitcher Premium! For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code 'BLAME,' PLUS exclusive bonus episodes.     Affordable Therapy By State (Curated by Crissy Milazzo): www.tinyurl.com/y64kwdnf    Need Advice?  www.dontblameme.show  Domestic Listeners Call: [phone]   International Listeners Send a Voice Memo To: [e-mail]    … with as much detail as possible under 3 minutes! I'll do my best to share my wonderful words of wisdom. If you're under 18, please get your parent's permission. Advice is for entertainment purposes only, so you can't blame me if I screw up your life. I kid! My advice IS AMAZING. - Want to WATCH this episode as well? Check out my YouTube channel:  http://youtube.com/meghanrienks Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/join/dontblameme See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

you kind of look like mrs hannigan but like hot thank you so much i just felt like this coat was something you would appreciate and by appreciate i mean no maybe maybe hate a little no i love love it lily will hate it but i love it i literally even told i told uh melissa portard filming she's like i like your outfit i was like well i knew i was going to be supported in my outfit because i was gonna say you need this in every color not only are you here and you support all good and bad fashion choices of mine um but melissa also doesn't judge me and i could never order on lily because she'd be like are you painting a goddamn house you could i could multitasking queen i'm ready i'll start i'm sorry i mean i was just gonna include this

hello everybody welcome back to another episode of don't blame me here today is internet's pure sunshine jocelyn davis oh megan rings you're not hyphenating your last name are you i just realize that because you're married about it yeah well I am going to legally change my last name yeah and then have your like professional business but I'm not publicly it's just been too much work to even get to this place that if I change my name I feel like it would just all go away no even Kim Kardashian threw West on the end exactly and I don't think I'm gonna do that for my career it's just too complicated although I do like Chris's last name Reesey yeah it's cute it means it means laugh in italian oh so like how cute is that that's so cute he's italian

yes oh my gosh that makes sense to me so italian that makes that um i just want to say on the record i am so glad that justice is being served we don't know for allegedly potentially for the megan rinks channel number two the vlog channel because um that is like really when i got to know you is when that channel took off. And you are such a pure inspiration to the world to be like, yes, it depends on your interpretation of the word. To break your face. But here's the thing. I am totally cool with people like getting surgeries, doing injections. I love Botox. Oh, a big fan. I just got my eyebrows laminated yesterday. What I don't like is when people straight up lie about it and you are the one to rip the bandaid off of that. I feel like we owe

you you are the reason thank you for that pure honesty so so so much it's true it's also wild because i've never gotten any shit for getting my nose done like i've never gotten any shit for like getting any work done but like yeah like getting my nose done because i was like um i literally built it up like i i kept telling everybody like before the videos because i i didn't know either of you when that was happening but it was like count down till my big announcement every goes oh my god what is she doing and then i was like i'm getting a nose job and everybody And he was like, okay. Right.

Guys, this is Don't Blame Me. It's an advice podcast. And if you want to give us a call for an upcoming episode, you can leave us a voicemail at 310-694-0976. And international listeners, you can send us an audio message at meganpodcasts at gmail.com. This is your third? This is my third appearance on this show,

and I love this show. You're already good. We don't even need to, like, I have no qualms. Oh, big word. Babe with a big word. Did you go to college for a semester? No, I did not. Oh, I did.

I did. Thank you so much. She did that. give me the credit technically i went for three three quarters i went for four quarters i went for a dollar i went for a whole dollar and then i left um but uh should we hop into the calls yes hi megan melissa and central guests i need advice on how to deal with my boyfriend's sister and mother who essentially hate me i'm 24 my boyfriend is 28 my boyfriend has a four-year-old son whose mother is out of the picture we've been dating for about a year and a half now and been living

together for five months my boyfriend and we are super close and protective of one another which I initially adored but now it's going to be a really big problem from what I know they don't like me because they feel like I'm not going to stick around and instead eventually leave they've made it clear they don't want to spend time with me or get to know me and I think they think that I'm no good for my boyfriend and his son a few months ago my boyfriend's son asked if I was his mother me and my boyfriend talked it over and decided that because I almost essentially am um we were both okay with it and explained that I was to him the best we could that I wasn't his biological mom but he could call me that if he wanted to so he has been for the past few months

last week he went to my boyfriend's mother's house for family dinner and it was actually really nice but after eating when everyone was just hanging out my boyfriend's son was tired and he like said something like mommy I'm sleepy the room got like so tense because no one besides myself and my boyfriend had ever heard me call him sorry had ever heard him call me that but when I went to put him to bed upstairs I heard everyone shouting and arguing and saying really hurtful things um when I got back downstairs his mother even asked me if I told him to call me that after that my boyfriend was like done he was angry and upset and we left or started to leave but when they were we were leaving there everyone was yelling and fighting and it was bad and I was crying my

son was crying and it was just we haven't really talked about it since um yeah i take care of my boyfriend's son i think of him as my own already and i've i've never thought of leaving them like my boyfriend is so close and loyal to his family and i don't want to be the cause of screwing it up but i also don't want to lose him i know he loves me and he's trying to defend me but i think it's hard for him to stand up to his mother and his sister he's the most amazing man i've ever met and we've had the marriage talk we know we want a future together and i just don't know how to explain to him and his family that i plan to be here for good thank you so much and any advice helps uh wow that's a lot wow i think i for the first time i see both sides i really see both

sides because like yeah i don't yeah i mean to be honest maybe i see one side more than the other but I don't agree with, I see, I agree with bits and parts. Cause I think the thing is, is a year and a half in, I think it is. Yeah. I don't think calling, I think that is like a lot for a kid. And I think that is every reason that his parents have every reason to think that this is not a potentially long-term because a year and a half is not long. It's so not. I mean, I totally agree. I literally dated Chris for like four years before we were like, so? Yeah.

That works for me. I do know other people who are typically significantly older. I would say like in their 30s and they've just like been there, done that. And they're like, we've been dating for a year. Like, what the hell? Let's just get married. Here's my opinion. I actually feel kind of bad for this girl.

Yeah. Because I don't think this situation is actually really completely about her. I think she's just like caught in the middle of a bunch of drama that like, I always say FTS, filter that, you know, I don't even know. Can I say that word? Filter that shit. Okay. Filter that shit for me.

Like, you know, I think family dynamics are so challenging and can play such a big role in a relationship. Like I'll deal with my family, you deal with your family, but like, let's filter it. You know what I mean? And I think it's so complicated because there is a kid involved and kids are so smart and they totally can catch on to what's going on. So I think that's like really the piece of it where like it's more heartbreaking. But a year and a half is super quick. And to me, unless it's going to be like, I'm officially like adopting you as my child, it's just so scary. Like what if it

doesn't work out? Like, I mean, I hate saying that and hopefully it does, but like, what if it doesn't you know and that's the part that like I think the person who I think is at fault here is in all cases is your boyfriend like I think even introducing a son in I'm sure he definitely needs help and like you need like you want a you want a partner when you're parenting and I'm sure for him feeling like I don't want my kid to miss out on having a mom and like feeling that obligation of being like wow i feel so bad that my kid's mom is not in the picture and like i i want them to have a mother figure and for him dating is like a package deal you get both of them exactly but the thing is is i i think i don't even think you probably should have met the kid until you guys

were probably dating for like i would honestly probably say like maybe like a year like i think he should have protected his kid that relationship and making sure all of that and then also I think that would protect you from his family as well because I think like there's he's their son so the parents are going to go in and I don't think they're going to be like looking at judgmental of him I think they're going to be like who is this girl coming in and playing house when in reality I think your boyfriend is the one who's like here come play house also my question is like why are they so turned off by her like why i feel like either he's dated other people in the past to have dropped the ball that have set the tone for the situation or there's like something

we don't know that has happened maybe a long time ago that maybe she should have been forgiven for or whatever but it just seems as though there's like there's got to be something more to the situation or the parents and everybody's just super involved in in the kids life which i totally get and to me it sounds like they're looking out for the kid because they're afraid that their son is not looking out for the kid in a bigger picture way because i think yeah on a day-to-day you would love your kid to be able to have you as a father and then have you you the girlfriend as like a mother figure but i think that the parents are thinking about it in long term and they're probably thinking about the fact that like maybe he hasn't had a great picker with girls and maybe

like he's and the fact you're 24 and the idea that like you're going to suddenly be a mom and it'd be in a different, totally different place at your life than all these other people. I just think that like moving in together after a year, I think is already kind of fast. And then I think for me too, I mean, I think like even when I was single and I was like older, whatever that means at this point in time. Um, but I was like, Oh, I'm totally willing to like date guys who have been divorced for sure. But for me personally, and it was something I thought about at my age in my like late 20s early 30s I wasn't ready to be like a stepmom yeah and I knew that for a fact um because like I just like know how how hard that's been for some of my friends who have had

to go through those situations I knew I wasn't ready for it and like if I if I had been what I probably would have done would have been like waited until like I don't I don't know like we were engaged or something yeah move in to where it was like that sense of solidarity for the kid i don't know it's so complicated because i've never been through this and to me it seems like what the parents are worried about and to be fair what i'm worried about is that he doesn't really have a sense of that like worry and those boundaries i don't think that he's really thinking this through and it's put you in a bad position and then also it is like the the strain with his relationship with his family and i don't know we don't know the mom of the child's not in

the life anymore which makes me assume that they are still a lot like they're still like around around alive and i'm sure as the parents they were like i'm sorry you you and your ex or whatever you like you guys had a kid together she walked away and left this kid and you're gonna bring another girl into your life within a year and a half introduced to the kid's life again and that they have every chance of like there's like a not a 50 50 chance but like history has shown that that happened before and I think they're trying to look out for the kid and him more than that is and I yeah and I just think like calling mom and all of that stuff I think is just complicated and it is it's crazy though the hard thing is is like all this has already happened I know and the kid

is already experiencing like having a mom and you know all of this stuff so like what does she do now like what do they do now I mean I don't know yeah I think they like just get married if that's what they want only if that's what they want to do to be honest I was gonna say I was like that's the thing like if that's like if that's where your relationship's at and all like I just think that they're definitely you're right I don't necessarily even know where to go from here I think I would just try and see it from their perspective and have a conversation without your boyfriend with his parents and be like i want to hear all of your grievances i want to hear all of this i think i i know that i love him and i love his kid and i i don't want to say i was like caught up in all of

that but now that i'm taking a step back i can realize why it might feel like this felt so fast or it feels like triggering in a repeated history and i want to hear everything that you have to say and i want us to be able to have an open communication so you can talk to me about it because that's the other part like if you're gonna come in and this kid is gonna call you mom you're gonna get criticized and critique like they are your own parents they're you're not protected as like oh be nice to my girlfriend because you don't have that anymore because now you also have a responsibility for this kid and that's like that's their grandchild so they're they can they're gonna go in on you and i think you just have to have that open conversation with

them and then figure out what their boundaries are of their comfortability and then your man needs to filter things he needs to like step it up i don't know what's going on here with that but like and therapy i would also oh my gosh i was just i'm also mostly recommending therapy for your boyfriend but yeah and like family therapy it could be super helpful to have a mediator there for this conversation i think that's a good call i think oh yes because i think that will also help um like if you do like a marriage and family therapist i think that'll also help in making uh sure that you guys are making and communicating with each other as you go through these choices of raising this kid without you guys actually being married or you

being the biological mother um i think that could also open some new insight and you know and like in a psychological way i love that i think that's the answer yeah we don't have the answer and also you tell you tell like his parents like you know we started going to go see a family counselor to figure that stuff out that is like okay that is serious that's like a grown-up step i love that yeah should we go on to the next one onto the next hello uh this is like my fourth time calling in trying to get all the words right i have a lot of anxiety so it's kind of hard to like say um without like messing up so i apologize again but so i'm 24 years old i've had friends since my sophomore year of high school and i just need some advice on

if she's a toxic friend or not it feels like she is and it's honestly getting to the point where i don't really want to continue friendship with her but because we've been friends for so long and because i love her family so much it's kind of hard to like let her go um her son's birthday was back in december and i had let her know a month prior that i would be leaving early for a prior engagement that I had put my RSVP in for and she had a problem with it before it even happened but then I let her know like I'll be there the night before and I'll be there almost the whole day with for it and all that you know to help her out and make sure I'm there for him and her and so the day the night before I had worked all day and then drove an hour and a half

away to get to her so that i could help her set up with everything and then i stayed up until five in the morning with her after being awake for almost 24 hours and then the next day we woke up like three hours later and we had to set up the whole party and i stayed with her until about 5 p.m almost 5 30 actually and then went to my effects and she had messaged me afterwards saying that I made her feel like a second option and was treating her and her son like crap. And, yeah, I was there to set up, but I shouldn't have left. How dare I leave in the middle of the party, blah, blah, blah, blah. And that was just one of it.

Then she decided to argue with me and take on a situation with my best friend and his wife and made it out to be that like me and him shouldn't be friends even though me and him have been friends for for years and you know we're close and it was just a very toxic kind of situation and it bothered me a lot honestly just from that whole birthday party situation that was just it for me so every time she talks to me I kind of get bothered so I don't really know what to do we've been friends for so long her son is a very important person in my life and you know I just care about them so much that it's hard to just let her go and I don't really know how to go about it because it's just it's a weird situation if you can help me I'd really

appreciate it um yeah love you guys bye wow so Megan would you say this is a toxic friendship a hundred percent literally if you're asking is my friendship toxic basically a hundred percent of the time the answer is yes i do want to know though if this is one incident that left this really bad taste in your mouth or if there have been other indicators because i'm uh i'm like a one-and-done kind of person like i don't i'm not like a multiple uh chances multiple offense no like i get that icky feeling and then every time you like talk to me i'm like like and i i don't even want to power through it because i'm like i'm just gonna come across as a bitch because like now i don't give a shit about you like i'm very i write people off very quickly um i feel so

honored to be here oh my god of course i have you know you know me i have a small group i have such a small group that all of my friends know each other and all of my friends don't even live in california like everyone knows each other because i was like well um but i think that's a good message for the caller too is like your wolf pack does not need to be 85 people no and i also you mentioned something about your best friend and her bringing that up to me it sounds like this sounds so look at me giving her the benefit out it sounds like she's definitely going through something and it sounds like she's probably had some animosity towards your other friendships and she sees you as a best friend and she knows that you don't see her as a best friend and she's

kind of lashing out the thing about toxic friends though which people don't tell you um most of the time toxic friends are the ones who walk away from you you're not always the one who needs to cut them off i i don't think i've ever personally cut off a toxic friend i think i may be excited from like one but i don't even think i really did i think they kind of did it to themselves but that's usually how it goes it gets a lot of people but it gets to be this ridiculous situation like she's doing to you right now where she's like bitching at you and it can and i've been in that situation so many times where it's like i literally did nothing you are trying to gaslight me like you are the toxic person here and you're essentially accusing me of being a toxic person

and then my response has always been I'm so sorry you feel that way and then that's it and then you don't hear from them again and that's like that's the part that I would say like and if they reach out to you don't respond I don't think you need to have this big breakup with her because right now she's laid all of that out there and you just say I am so sorry that you feel that way which by the way is not a real apology which is why I'm saying that but if you want to actually apologize to someone don't say that but say I'm I'm really sorry that you feel that way and then that's it and if she reaches back out that's when you ghost her but I don't think it's this let's have this sit down break up conversation and talk because and if she is going through something and she

totally realizes like a little while later being like that was ridiculous of me like I was dealing with this this and this it leaves that door open for her to step up and be a better friend and not feel like apologize and be like hey I was going through x y and z in which case you can kind of you know feel more comfortable continuing the friendship but I totally agree with you I have over the course of my multiple decades on this earth had a good amount of like toxic because I have a big friend circle you do but I would say the people that are very close to me are very small like Chris and I had a really small wedding I'm so sorry I missed it Megan was invited for I know I was by the way people were very angry where was her cake that she was supposed to make

you you're gallivanting and i know and the invite we checked it was gonna cost us twice as much they were like and if you want to cancel this reschedule it will be three thousand dollars a ticket no absolutely not i was like just watch the video it'll be great but um your invite is still on the fridge and we were clearing out i can she was over yesterday we were clearing out all of these other wedding invites um that we've gone to with matzahs and i was like taking off the fridge and he goes well no keep joss and chris's up and i was like i love you so much thank you let me take it down also it's literally just like a picture of them so it's like yeah the first time i saw it i was like why do you just have a picture of them on your fridge a long time

ago that is up and then the only other one that we got a new wedding invite this week but then the only other like card that is withstood like my purge um is uh my friend cammy her baby magnolia her christmas card that's a beautiful child so i feel honored to share a fridge space with them No, but we have, I mean, we have a lot of people in our life that we're super grateful for, but over the course of my, you know, sort of like life with friends, I've realized a few things like friends should really generally overall enhance your life. Oh yeah. And that for me with friendships, especially now, I find it very hard to find, to be friends

with people who are emotionally like really all over the place where you don't know when you're going to walk in a room what the consistency is like like are you mad at me are you happy with me like that brings me so much stress being unpredictable is my least favorite trait that people that's like my that's an automatic no-go trait for people for me and for me it's like emotionally unpredictable other stuff i'm like oh if you got to cancel whatever no yeah oh no flaky i'm fine with flaky is fine i enjoy i actually encourage flaky friends i do too because don't you get excited when stuff gets canceled yes and i can stay home yeah but emotional consistency is so important. And I agree with you. I think it's always important to tell people

because I think when people get upset, it's just that they want to be heard. But that doesn't mean what they're doing is okay. All right. So I think you say like, I'm so sorry that you feel that way. I hear you. And then that's all you really need to say. It doesn't mean that you need to let these people walk all over you. And with me with toxic friendships, I don't like drama either. You don't need to have a breakup. No. You just step away quietly and don't continue facilitating the friendship. I know that you're really like involved in your friend's son's life, but it's kind of like you might have to choose what you want to do because it's not like you can just hang out with the kid by yourself. No, that's true. You know? Yeah. And like what do you really

want out of life? Or you can have the conversation of like, I know you're upset. Is there like something else going on like you know it felt like you got really upset about x y and z and i just want to make sure like genuinely you're okay if you do want to continue the friendship yeah yeah i think if that's if you want to salvage that that's like a great way to go about it and i yeah i think that there's so much toxic people have such uh this pride of the fact they have no idea they're toxic and they have this pride that they are always right and so i think they do a lot of the legwork for you yeah and they do and that's the part that's wild because it's so draining to be friends with them and when you're in the trenches with it but every time i've had like

a breakup with a toxic friend it was like surprisingly easy they did it to themselves and then it's like they want to come back around that's when you have the choice to ignore it and also it puts you in a much i don't know i say it also puts you in a much better light as opposed to like fighting fire with fire like she's coming at you so angry and then you retaliate with being like no you're full of shit like i said all this stuff and like it's not gonna feel you think it'll feel cathartic it doesn't like it really doesn't feel because she's not gonna hear you she's just saying to say it because she wants to hurt your feelings she's not ready to receive any sort of information that will make you feel like wow i'm so glad i got that off my chest

because it's gonna feel like you just set it to a wall so might as well like write a letter of everything you would want to say to her and then just let the friendship fizzle out and if she realizes all that stuff then like assess then if if you even want to like reevaluate it all and we have emojis now so like if she texts you something mean just you know just like it even that's my biggest one just like it that's actually great thumbs up that's the one that you know i'm just like or just send a confusing emoji like a palm tree yeah like it's like what does that even mean they can never accuse you of not responding like i sent that kick-ass palm tree what are you talking about obviously everyone knows that means i love you so much

my love for you is like coconuts but if you're stressed out about it like i don't know you're 24 and live your best life yeah i think once you have that icky feeling that's when you're like okay boy bye so best of luck that's our ted talk i am 28 years old and i've been dating a close friend of mine for almost a year now he's 30 years old before this i've only been with one other person and that was a serious and long-term relationship. He has dated several other women before me and only one of them was a serious relationship, which was his high school slash college girlfriend. So it was a long time ago. I would say that he's the type of guy who has fear of commitment. So I knew the risks I was taking when we started dating. I still decided

to go for it and take it slow and see where it goes. Last month I somehow ended up asking him if he thinks we're in a relationship. He seemed very nervous so I eased him and I said whatever his answer is it's fine no pressure. He said I don't know. After some talking I told him that I think we're in a relationship but I understand that he is going to need more time before he can come to the same conclusion and he was fine with it. Here's my problem. We've known each other for a long time. I've met his entire family many, many times. We're on the same page about all of the major life stuff. But most importantly, we have the same set of friends and we also work together, which is a whole other conversation. Despite all of this, I don't understand where

his hesitation is coming from and why it's so difficult for him to just call this a relationship and call me his girlfriend. I know for a fact that we're exclusive and I also know that he has deleted all of his dating profiles since we started dating. We have also talked about moving in together this summer and he likes the idea of it and we're going to have more discussions in detail sometime in the spring. However, after this conversation, I'm a little uncertain because moving in together is a pretty serious next step. And if he's not sure, then I'm not sure. I'm also afraid to say I love you to him because I feel like he will not reciprocate. Do you guys have any advice on how I can navigate the situation?

and do you think there's any scenario in which i will not end up with major heartbreak and lose him as my friend and lose all my other friends if needed i can dm you guys more details that i couldn't fit into the three minute message like what he's tall and has a great penis that's always what it is he's such a great guy he's such a good i know this makes like but i promise he's a really good guy like he has a dog and he like doesn't kick it and like he's held a baby like he's such a good guy he's such a good guy he just is not into you at all you know what this started reminding me of he's just well that also you need to read start steve harvey's book because i was watching the movie i've never read the book but i started watching the movie and i loved it that's for

another day this reminded me of on gilmore girls when rory started dating logan and he was like I'm not a boyfriend boyfriend guy and she was like you can't say that because they ended up together they ended up together but don't give her that they are not the rule they are the exception my friend which is why you also need to watch he's just not that into you literally I cannot tell you more I cannot tell you more if a man wants to be with you if he wants to see you if he wants to be in a relationship with you he will come to you but you have to make yourself a little more scarce and i feel like well this guy is not into you no sorry this is the thing i had always had commitment issues literally i broke up with every guy that i ever dated like three months in i'd be like i

fucking hate you i can never see you again i would literally fly leave the state and like never call them back and just ghost them and then i was like i can't see you i fucking hate you and like i you were inside me yesterday and this just changed like i literally have massive commitment issues like i wasn't okay with anyone even holding my hand like i like any of that shit like just made me if someone if a guy called me pretty i was like drop dead we're done get out of my face why are you so obsessed with me i hate you and i am in a four year plus relationship like and that that relationship and but not even that relationship moths was the one who changed that for me so not wanting to not being into like not wanting anything not being afraid of commitment if you

have been dating for a year he that's that that would have you would have been it already there is nothing else to fucking wait for no and there are if you can't be like oh we don't really know each other that well they've been friends for 10 years exactly oh my gosh also he just wants to fuck you also like have you ever heard of the concept you should never shit where you eat like you should if you do not start dating someone you work with unless you're like your friend this is gonna be the most long-term love of my life ever then do things start dating whatever someone no matz and i we worked that's how we met was we worked together and we didn't start dating contrary to popular belief we didn't start dating until as after he left he didn't ask me out until

he was like hey i put in like i got a new job and i put in my like two weeks do you want to go out and i was like and he's like yeah in two weeks once i'm officially done here so fun watching that love story unfold have you ever had him on so you could share all the okay he's here every valentine's day that is adorable don't listen to the first episode though because he's a big mouth breather he's like it was more of a whistle though well yeah he's a little congested yeah my sister dated a guy she worked with at her first job her first year working she dated one of her co-workers they broke up yeah and she had to get a new job because she's like i can't go back there i never want to see him again ever so like she had to change her whole life because of

their breakup it worked out in the long run yeah she's happy but you know you definitely think you're the exception to the rule and that you could change him and him saying hey i'm afraid that commitment's not really my thing that's his out and like that's why he told you if you're afraid of commitment i didn't tell like i i really liked mons i didn't want him to know i have commitment issues that's not a flattering thing i kind of was like let's take this slow and he could read the fact that like and we were friends before so like he knew okay she's not really big into like that kind of stuff her Aquarius rising comes in hot like she's like I don't have feelings get away from me and he we really played that but smart and I also did it in a way that I

I was protecting him from the fact that I knew that this is something that I do and so like I don't want to I don't want you to say that you love me I would refuse to let him say he loved me I didn't want to be exclusive I didn't want any of that stuff because I'm like I don't want to set any expectations that i'm not sure i can uphold right and until then mature of you thank you and i was you know younger than your boyfriend and he's not doing that with you he's not protecting you from him and if this is the choices he's making he's giving he's telling you what's gonna happen and then once you get upset about it it's gonna be like well i told you like i told you this was gonna happen i told you so and i think that's just like the it's just dumb and if a year

in he'll know don't move in with him you are literally friends who fuck no like if he wanted to date you he would date you i wonder if all their friends know that they're dating because like what if it's also this feels like one of those situations where like let's just keep it between us let's keep it special but which is like other people too are all their friends just like co-workers oh yeah exactly yeah leave the office dude i if i were you lots of hot dudes outside. And you're a real bad bee. Here's what I think you should do. I think you should like really practice what you're going to say and just act like super casual and just be like, I just feel like this isn't really working out. And we want different things. Like I wish you

the best. Let's just stop this where let's just stop this now before it goes any further. And then just like stick with it. And if he really cares about you and wants to be with you, he will be, but I feel like you're giving him too much right now. And then I think, but I think truthfully what you're going to see really quickly is that he'll be like okay and that he and then this is the other part give it two months he'll have a girlfriend and he'll be engaged and have a baby like that's what always that's always and it's not the thing is is it people think that like oh someone doesn't like want commitment they don't want to settle down like i i can i can change that like this this relationship can change that you can't do anything he has to choose i want to

change and we've said this before on the podcast like he has to choose he wants to change and he's also going to choose that without you knowing he's going to be like i hate a commitment i hate a commitment i meet this girl i want to commit to her i'm going to do this this is on me not like he doesn't need you to show him what this relationship could be and like how great it is and you stick it out that's like it's not what happens no he needs to just decide for himself and again if he wants to be with you he will but it just doesn't seem like he wants to and that really sucks but like you might want to start putting your resume out there you know yeah and this is the other part i just want to say not everyone who sleeps with you wants to date you

no and not everyone who's friends with you and who also sleeps with you wants to date you and not everyone who's nice to you wants to date you like there's this someone can be really polite and really nice and on paper a good guy and treat you nicely and then ultimately just not like you that much and it sucks because you would honestly rather someone be a dick so then you don't like so you have a clear path yeah and then you're like oh fuck you you treat me like shit but it's like oh you treat me so well and everything is great except you don't want to date me and then but that's that's all there is to it and i'm curious to know like what your friends are telling you do you have the kind of friends who are like oh my gosh well maybe this happened or

maybe maybe this is why like you need to have my cousin's friends like dated the guy for six years and like he had five other girlfriends and finally they ended up together and he's like so obsessed with her yeah no no no that's not a thing no not a thing no no and it's also like we're applauding him for deleting his dating apps yeah because he has constant pussy he doesn't need it anymore and honestly i would not be surprised if he's with other girls oh i would not doubt that's the reason why you say we're not in a relationship there is no commitment so you can so he can get away with whatever other people yes yeah i said that to motts and i was like by the way i just want you to know we are not exclusive and he's like yeah but i'm not seeing anyone else

like i i'm just putting it out there but i might be allegedly we are not exclusive you can see anyone else and he was like i know what you mean i'm just letting you know i was like okay for sure we'll do we'll circle back i love your guys's i love your story yeah i was a fuck boy oh my gosh and now i like i'm obsessed with him and i'm like god damn it remember when he was like obsessed with me and then i was like who cares now i'm like being like oh my gosh when did i lose all my edge when did i lose my edge everyone knows you're always supposed to make sure they like you more than you like them i'm screwed i'm so screwed genuinely how i feel like fuck i'm soft now you fucking soften me bro like you're fucked up okay um well best of luck and um if uh you are

not a part of our facebook group you should be and uh we'll have 15 i mean 1500 other people um tell you on your story where it's not just us and they can give you some nice and uh good support i need to join that facebook group you do it's a good it's a really good time you have to answer the questions correctly yeah oh it's a private facebook yeah okay good i love those and also some of you like we i just want to say when it comes like there are answers when we can totally tell that english is your second language and you will definitely get slack cut if things are like i mean things are not necessarily spelled wrong or like uh uh the sentence grammar or even if you're answering the questions in there you you've got it but it's a little maybe lost in

translation a little bit there are some of you who are from kentucky and are using the wrong tenses and all of this stuff and i'm like nah nah nah nah no no that shows you don't follow direction no and we got to have trustworthy people because they're sensitive things being talked about in the group so read the questions completely i answered them completely do not even if you don't if you say something like haha i don't remember this one you're not getting in delete that request you look like a dumb shit i don't know no please let me in still i don't know you sarah right this is how we screen people to get in yeah so and then you'll get kicked out by the way yeah and don't send a message saying i don't know it but i i have listened to every

episode no you haven't no obviously not they're literally such easy questions yeah they're so easy if you don't answer any questions don't bother you're just wasting my time and i hate my time me wasted that's that part that's the one that's so dumb and then they'll resend it like do you know how to read because why are you trying to run a facebook group with like lots of words there's a lot of words here you have to read a lot if you can't do that not the place for you they're probably trying to meet people it's not the place you still got a type to meet people that's true actually good point yeah well um after that rant is it time for a break okay we'll take a quick break and we'll be right back

okay everybody we are back from our break and we're gonna hop into the rest of my calls oh baby it's basically my friend who we're good friends but i don't think i can bring it's up to her um she's joined an MLM scheme um and she's asked me to be a part of her team I'm not gonna do it don't stress but it's part of me it's like you are a poor uni student you're eating 50 cent noodles maybe you need some extra cash but I heard you have to do a lot of nagging your friends and you lose friends and sometimes it doesn't even work so like the average joe um anyway i'm not going for that because don't worry i'm not gonna do it but yeah like do i tell her to get out of it and all the bad things i've heard

or just let her go and see what she does with it see what happens i mean i'm not gonna stop someone doing something that they want to do that they're kind of passionate about i don't want to see her get fucked over i just think there are so many different types of mlms like you could sell like topperware or like mary k or whatever or you could be selling like prepaid legal which is like not a thing which i would feel like ethically like not okay about but if you're selling like a real product that people are actually into like i'm not gonna do it but like if you want to cool yeah i think i i my my thought process is the same with this i think if i think being concerned for your friend uh i mean i think this if she if it's a kind of mlm

where she doesn't have to put any money down if it's just sending people like through her link if she doesn't have to pay for inventory if she doesn't have to put any money into it and it's just again like commission links and like getting other people to sign up through her links and she has no yeah no stock and inventory and no money losses then who gives a shit like it'll either work or it doesn't but she's not out anything and i think if it is one of those things you could send her a bunch of this information about like how mlms are like a load of shit but most of the time in the reporting of all that it's going to be focusing on the ones that are going to put you into debt where you're spending more money than you're making and that you're because the issue

is is that the pyramid scheme of like the trickle down which mlms are not technically not all mlms our pyramid schemes, but it's the trickling down of the fact that if you're doing so well, there's no way like this is also like basic, basic knowledge of like business practice at all. There's no way for every single person to be doing so well. And the company still make money and still be able to pay everybody out. So even if you know, 50 people who are doing so well, those 50 people are doing so well because 10,000 other people are losing thousands of dollars. it's not even like oh these people aren't doing as well and eventually they'll get there it's in order for people to do well other people have to have to lose something yeah it's not it's not like

a oh they're doing so they're not making any money but they will eventually it's like no they've lost ten thousand dollars so someone else can make a hundred thousand dollars so that's how that works but the thing is if she's not investing any money into it and it is just like yeah like a product landing page uh then i think even if you send her all that information it's not going to be super pertinent to her specific case um so i would find that out but to be honest i would like i would just send the info anyway because like that's the thing i've watched i'm obsessed with mlms i think they're we had an ad for the podcast for a while um this podcast called the dream and it made me listen to it um so the first season was all about mlms okay and it is so

fascinating they interview all these people who've like because they've been around since like the 70s and like they're so amway yeah my gosh there's been so many the whole thing so it's like so crazy crazy interesting and then the second season for this is uh for the dream is the business of wellness which is like one of my hot huge mlm oh my god it's the biggest shit that makes me nothing makes me more upset than paying a thousand dollars to not be depressed i'm like serotonin doesn't come in the form of crystals. And if it does, then you don't have a serotonin in your balance. Like you just needed a crystal, but like, why'd you pay all of that money? Like that shit, like it's wild. So I think that's really fascinating. So I, I, I, in so much of the

content I've watched, um, if you, if you want to be like more educated on it as like a friend, Tiffany Ferguson did a video with her sister and her sister got involved in MLMs when she was like in her early twenties. And she talked about how much of the fact that like, she just didn't really know any better and like your surround if you meet those people and they tell you all these really great stories most of the time people who aren't into mlms are being kind of like you of just being polite of being like no she's like yeah no one told me that this could all blow up in my face like everybody was either into it or was just kind of like no and like gave me a weird look but i didn't think anything of it so i think like if you feel a responsibility to be like hey heads up

and i think that could be a great idea because even if this is one that maybe she's not investing money in maybe this one works and then she does takes that money she's made and then starts doing another one that she has to invest her money in to make even more money or like later down the pipeline that's something that they want you to do like reinvest in yourself um so but it's like when if your friend asks you to get involved in this mlm i think that's the perfect opportunity to be like thank you so much i'm not interested because of x y and z because at that point like she's asking you to get involved in a business endeavor, which is different than a friendship endeavor, which is a big reason that I have a problem with MLMs because unless you're selling

like a tangible real product like Tupperware or like cooking tools or whatever, what are you selling actually? And do you want to get all your friends and family mixed up in that? Because that is like the way that people enter these markets. I will say I am a huge fan of Cutco knives that is one of my favorite mlfs they're the best knives in the world i've never worked for them in my life but these knife salesmen used to come to my parents house and be like we're gonna cut through a penny now and they would they're amazing but that's like a tangible product yeah that is bettering the world that also you don't have to buy from a person they have a website see that's what i was gonna say so it's like legit beauty counter which is like

an all like not it's like a all natural makeup and skincare line they have a section of their website that is like representatives but you go through a link so no one has to buy anything and i've posed about that before and someone's like i thought you were so against mlm i'm like it's not an mlm you have to invest no money you don't have to buy any product you don't have to stock your own store like it's more like an affiliate link it's literally me posting an affiliate link so like there's nothing wrong with that but i will also say any any fucking time any now i'm not gonna say you guys but anytime any of my followers slide into my dms and say hey i get so many mlm pitches in my dms and every serious every single time i send an a screen a copy and

paste from my notes app back of being like hi thank you so much for reaching out hello i think i say i was like i think i don't even say thank you i was like hi uh that's gonna be a no from me dog here's some information some links about like the dangers of mlms like if you're a student this is not there are plenty of other ways you can make lots of money and you can look into ones that have that don't have you doing any upfront and all of that sort of stuff because that's like the other shit because then even at the end of the day too you have to do your research because even if it's some i know lots of people love rodent and fields or whatever but if you've done that's skincare too yeah it's skincare but if you do if you read a lot of articles about it

the the reason why it also has to work at a certain point if you're not investing your own money if you're not investing money into uh your products like you having your stock and they're able to still make money and you're still able to make money with commission that means the products aren't marked up so much and so i've read are they high quality that i've read all these articles where chemists break it down and they're like you could buy this at the drugstore for like a fraction of the price but people have this and when you have something behind a paywall that's harder to get especially skincare you're like oh it must be good because in order to get the good shit for my acne i have to go to my dermatologist so to get the good shit i must have to pay a lot

of money it must need to be hard to get you can't just buy it at a drugstore so i would i i think just in general regardless of what kind they are i think there are like lesser evils of it and i hopefully think that we're going to be moving more towards like the affiliate like codes and that kind of stuff because you think about that even colleges have like they have a college reps for like i mean brands have like college reps where it's like a big brand and i mean like brandy melville but like any yeah like any of those like princess polly or whatever and you can be a college student at usc and you're cute and pretty and they're like hey well if you post this often we'll give a 30 off coupon code for you posting this and then you'll get commission

for all or just open an amazon affiliate store and just like promote that stuff to your friends and family i feel like it's just a little more ethical and less and you're gonna get more money that way too like you're not gonna have just become a bartender dude best of luck to you and your friend and i hope she doesn't get scammed and good for you for not being a scammer and also i might at this point have to uh flag any comments that say mlm or not a scam so none of you can comment and come for us being like no actually they're really great it really just depends it's like do you want to be your own boss do your research oh hi megan melissa and potential guests i'm 22 and in my last year of college and i'm super into one of my close friends that

graduated from my school last year he lives two hours away because of work we met and became close friends only two months before he graduated and moved out of town but since then he's managed to get really close, your visits, calling, etc. We're planning on moving to the same city in July, so distance isn't really a big issue. He's definitely shown that he's an enemy, but I think the ball is in my court to determine what happens next. The only real problem with our situation is that I'm super into my faith and he's atheist. Otherwise, he's a literal perfect match for me, which is insane.

He's incredibly sweet, super into social justice like I am, and is truly the most loving person that I've ever met. We've talked about what we want out of a future partner, and I mentioned Faith, and he knows that he doesn't have everything I'm looking for, but I have everything that he's looking for. I like him a lot and don't want to convert him or anything, of course, but I ideally only want to be in a serious relationship with someone who shares my faith with me. and from knowing how close we already are if we started dating it would probably be something that got serious and lasted a while i've never felt so strongly about wanting to be with someone before and it's something i've been feeling for months i think i want to date him anyway and just

risk whatever happens but i wanted to know what you guys think i also want to actually sit him down the next time he comes to town and talk to him about everything because we are just people who can be really open and honest with each other um but I wanted suggestions for where and how to have this conversation because I'm really nervous about it thank you oh gosh oh god she answered her own question multiple times yeah I feel if this is really a deal breaker for you that's totally cool but like you can never change someone ever no or go into something believing you might yeah or even believing that you might change your opinion like yes or you might change yourself for the way you feel um if it's like a deal breaker for you if it's like as important as

you're saying it is some people are like I have so many friends who are like interfaith like I'm Jewish and I'm Catholic or whatever and they're just like you know anything goes like whatever it's fine for and but they already knew that going into it so it wasn't like a huge deal for them and I because I think the thing is like what it really comes to play in is because I don't even think i think in some cases uh it can be how you were raised and i think that really applies much more to like religion that's based heavily on like culture and tradition like tradition in the sense of like that's not i don't say like not mainstream but like that hasn't been like a hallmark tradition so like everyone celebrates christmas i mean people tons of people celebrate

christmas who aren't christian right and so i think like i don't i wouldn't consider christian a different way of upbringing because i think it's so infiltrated into our society already but like being jewish 100 i didn't i didn't go to hebrew school like i didn't have any of like that kind of experience like i didn't go on birthright and all of that stuff no i wish oh my gosh i was just about to have my mind blown like how do i know my two best friends are jewish and both of them that was like they got to a certain age where they only dated guys who are jewish because it was like it was part of the fact that they're like well i want someone who like i don't have to like explain my family too i want someone who's going to kind of come in and

understand and know the nuances of it all and i'm not going to feel like weird and kind of have like to teach someone something because already every family is different but like that's something put that on top it's like it's a close thing and then they were like and also my kids i want my kids to go to hebrew school i want my i don't want my kids to celebrate christmas i want my kids to celebrate hanukkah i want them to have that same sort of upbringing that i loved that was because of my religion. I think that's a very mature decision to make. I'm Christian and so is Chris and that was something like as I got older, I made the decision like if I'm going to get into a serious relationship, like whatever, you can date people and like, you know, sample all of

the flavors out there if that's your thing, whatever. But to me, like if I was going to marry someone, it was important that we shared that to me. Now, like I said, I have a lot of friends who are interfaith couples and it really works for them. But it sounds like for you specifically, this is very important to you in your potential like life partner. That being said, I don't think there's anything wrong with just like sitting down with this close friend of yours. By the way, have you guys hooked up too? That's like a whole other added layer to it. Um, but sit down and be like, Hey, I have feelings for you. Um, I don't expect you to like want to change. I just want to have this like open conversation with you, let you know I like you.

Here's where I'm coming from. Here's where I know and appreciate and respect that you're coming from. I'm not trying to like belittle you in any way for your beliefs. But I just wanted to throw it out there and have an open conversation and see where you stood. Because I mean, who knows what this person might say to you. They might be like, I don't like you. Yeah. And then that's an easy out for you. That is true. This reminds me of literally an episode of The Bachelor this season. i i think yeah it's if it's if this is important to you and i will say on the opposite side of the spectrum someone's religion is also important to me when i was dating them and for me it was like i'm gonna date someone i i would honestly prefer to date someone who is also like an agnostic is

an atheist totally i don't want to get in a position where it comes up later to become an issue in the future. And when I think about it with kids, it's like, for me, I'm not comfortable having my kids be baptized. That's not something I'm comfortable with, but also I don't want to stop somebody if for them, that's their, their, their true belief system is that that's what their kids need. They need that to happen. And like, because also like I've read into it, I understand like what the, the, uh, the meaning, the idea that I would take away that from somebody who wanted that. It's like, it's too much to put upon yourself. Way too much. And someone who loves you will not try to put that upon you and like moral of the story is you just can never change

people or want to change people yeah and then also if you think about your family situation are you bringing them into like a highly religious family where he's like if he's very vocal about his views and all of that and your families and it's going to create that divide and that barrier and you just don't know and again i think especially just think about it when it comes to your kids like because i think if you think okay and maybe it is in that conversation with him which it's very a very like like you would talk about it now even though you're not dating but it's like i want to know the extent of where you're at because i think you could think of oh they are atheists but like they're fine going to church on christmas he might not be

he might not be okay with your kids getting baptized but you would think like okay well yeah he doesn't practice it but he'd be fine if his kids do he might not be and that might be also your deal breaker for you by realizing that your kids wouldn't be raised in the same way that you were if that's how you want and also the good traits you're saying about him they're not mutually exclusive to him lots of people have it lots of people are nice they're really great guys and they're also religious like you can he's i don't want to say it's a dime a dozen but if it's something that's important to you this is kind of i don't know i don't have to make it religious but like maybe this is god's way of being like hey this isn't your person for sure and another

thing i feel like i talked about this on your podcast last time before chris and i got married we like oh my gosh we went to so many different like couples therapy this and that because we're like both like kind of overthinkers a little bit in some ways. And we were like, is this a really, we've been together for so long. We're like, is this going to work? So we took this quiz and I think you might've even been to it where I think a lot of different faith traditions use it, but it's not a religious thing at all where you take this quiz and literally they give you results at the end being like, you're not compatible or you are, and like, you should still stay together if you're not compatible. Like they're not telling you to break up. But I mean, if you guys really

are that serious from the get-go maybe before you start dating take this quiz and then talk to like a therapist and see what they say because sometimes having an outside opinion that is professional yeah can be super super meaningful but this is why i stopped having male friendships really yeah when i was like in my early 20s like obviously there's exceptions like you have a lifelong you're like lily they all fell in love with you or i had like a lot of gay friends awesome but i just had some really bad experiences with straight guy friends where i was like oh my gosh we're best friends this is so cool and then they're like i love you i'm gonna love you for the rest of my life and i was like oh no you and lily are the same person so bad about it so that could be what's

going on here too yeah sorry it could be that i very much think so who knows yeah i yeah we're biting off way more than he might not even be but it's a good thing you're thinking about these kind of things it seems very mature but yeah you have virgo you have cancer like i want to know what you're yeah where you live in are you an aquarius you live in in the future i'm not an aquarius no thinking a lot about feelings yeah too many feelings too many feelings uh or maybe a libra you're wearing all of your options it is time oh gosh is this i gotta take off my coat when things get crazy where they call us a second time uh no they're giving us their own opinion and advice if they've listened oh great okay awesome but it also might be crazy we don't know

roll the tapes i have a feeling it is so i'm 27 um i'm calling in response to a caller on the most recent episode with melissa um so the girl who is like angry and uncomfortable listening or overhearing her parents. So I guess my feeling perspective, I'm coming from the other side of that. Because I'm a mom, I've got a little girl who just turned six, and my son is three and a half. So I'm kind of coming from the parents perspective on this. So first of all, 100% understand totally valid to be kind of uncomfortable at the idea of your parents having sex no one wants to think about their parents in that context that feels kind of weird and uncomfortable so i understand that um but she's definitely in the call about oh overhearing my phone

like doesn't make me upset but when it's my parents i get really angry um from the parent side of that or from somebody who is a parent and has children um beyond having a conversation about being made uncomfortable i think the the getting really angry about it you just gotta let go dude um parents don't stop being sexual people just because we're parents and intimacy is such an important necessary part of a healthy committed relationship i think you just need to reframe your feelings about this have a conversation so that this is making me uncomfortable but understand this is like normal and it's healthy for the relationship and it's a good thing so anyway that's my two cents um

you know i i have kids and having kids didn't make me not like sex so anyway um i mean i'm sorry that your parents are making you uncomfortable but and that definitely should have a conversation but i mean getting angry about it dude i mean your parents are still people and that's a weird transition to make in your 20s to understand that your parents are still people and they're not just your parents. One time my sister walked in on my parents having sex. Melissa's done it.

No, I've never walked in. I just could hear them. My sister walked in on my parents having sex when she was in high school. She called me. I was at college and started like painting a picture of the whole thing and I hung up on her. I was like, I don't need this in my life. She called me back, started re-explaining. I was like,

I'm going to block you if you continue doing this. I love your sister. So you want to know how she processed this? She went to school, told all of her classmates and all of her teachers, and it was like open house or something the next week. And one of the teachers told my dad. Your parents are so wholesome, too. Told my dad.

Told my dad. Allie's told everyone at the whole school that she walked in on you guys having sex. I cannot imagine your parents' reaction. It was like an afternoon delight situation, too. My mom was mortified. I was going to say, they're the most wholesome people in the world. So funny. Your mom is like a hallmark mom.

is she really like she was like mortified still this is like 20 years ago and she's still upset about it like we get it your parents like to have sex good for them but like just shut the door yeah you know i just this reminds me of a tiktok of this audio where it's like well just like enjoy it and it's like no like this idea this is the part that like she's angry and this is i'm gonna call you karen because i'm a level with you you're being like you're being a karen you're angry it's very valid to be angry at a level of respect i think parents and kids have the same level of respect for one another i don't think it's because you're parents you must respect me but i don't have to respect you why the fuck should i respect you if you don't respect me

so that's what this is it's her saying i know my parents would never be okay with me doing this in their home they would feel so uncomfortable and so disrespected if i ever did this and it just they're doing it and it's feeling not respectful for me and also this you are you so cherry-picked and like selective listening for the call so much of also what she was angry about was the fact that like her parents like will talk about sex but then always go like oh well she gets really uncomfortable like don't make her feel awkward she's like well i don't feel awkward you're making me sound like a baby like i'm adult like the whole thing was was weird and it was that frustration and anger of the fact that like she's not really allowed to talk about her own sex life

like they're very weird about that but they'll talk about their sex life and then comment on how uncomfortable it makes her and then they'll hook up very loudly while they know she's home and like yeah that's a level of respect like respect your kids the same way masturbating in the airbnb in the airbnb next to like her dad was in the kitchen with her and she was here in the kitchen with her dad and then the mom was in another room masturbating like like why would like the dad needs to leave i feel like the parents are like getting off on it or something that's weird there's like even when you're like hooking up at i don't know like somewhere like you don't want other yo you're i'll be quieter i'll always be quieter like just i mean like you

know this is a level of respect i'm wondering about this girl who has a six-year-old like why is she so adamant about this does she have her kids like still sleeping in her room with or something like yeah do you need like validation i don't know it just seems really weird and also your kid is six we're talking about someone who's in their 20s and that we're not talking and also like if your kid was sexually active in your house loudly would you enjoy that it seems very strange it doesn't seem like anyone on the planet earth would be like oh this is cool like no i fucking hate the idea that i i just really hate that like the parent deserves respect and the kids are kids and get told what to do like i fucking hate that it's not fair it's not it's it's not fair at all

that being said i'm so happy for your parents that they have a very happy active sex life like that's great no one's gonna hate on that that's awesome especially if you've been together for like 500 years or whatever yeah do you but just like in another you know sandproof room and there's also a way to be sex positive without making your kid uncomfortable yes exactly i came from a far too sex positive but i also came from like a sex positive home but very similar to the original caller like very sex positive but not about me only about everybody else not about me everybody else was allowed to have sex and it was not shameful everything was fine but then it was also like very graphic very vocal and to a point where like you're making if you're making a kid

uncomfortable that's like that it's too much you can bombard a kid it's like watching it's like literally making a kid watch a horror movie and then being like should we talk about this and explain it you're like wow too much too fucking fast why do you have to show me schindler's list to tell me about how grandma died like i don't need to like we don't need to associate death and then like let me show you this movie like that it's just no i just can't imagine having your mom masturbating in another room i know loudly like if you're gonna do it just like just go yeah turn on a faucet or something turn on some tunes watch that her be also the mom though who like turns the faucet on when she poops

but like not when she's masturbating she's like moaning and shit this is just so niche but I'm glad that you have this show to help people people need you um but apparently Karen doesn't Karen's Karen and I'm happy for you Karen for uh getting all that dick in and I hope for

you when your son turns 18 or whatever the age of consent is he fucks loudly in your house and you applaud him and thank him so much karen's disgusting that's what i mean like that's like karen's just like good job good job did you guys want a snack absolutely not oh well my gosh wow what a journey i love how she didn't even come

for us she gave her the collar and on behalf of the caller we came for her i feel like she has other things at hand going on in her personal life also do you listen to this podcast with your children in the car oh no probs oh wow your kids first words issue pussy i mean there's six and three so i think they're past first words i know it's even more dangerous they're like repeating full sentences yeah oh so funny that's it for our episode wow oh my gosh um joss thank you for being on thank you for having me always a joy to be around such a pleasure as always i want to encourage everyone watching to head right now over to megan's vlog channel which by the time this video goes live sure as hell better be reinstated because if the powers that be the

people that are a part of this journey cannot make it happen no one and i don't know who can no one can plug your shit where can people find you so i'm everywhere most recently on tiktok i'm pretty excited about it yeah i hired a tiktok consultant um last week which is a real thing no no her name is stephy she's 21 and she ticked and talked with me all day for four days oh my very interesting journey so i am on the tiktok but you can also find me on youtube various places literally i'm just sick of myself but you can google me jocelyn davis i'm everywhere check her out uh and if you guys want to be on an upcoming episode of the podcast you can leave us a message at 310-694-0976 international listeners you can send us an audio message at meganpodcast

at gmail.com uh you can listen to our podcast anywhere ad free on stitcher premium uh watch it on youtube and uh also pre-order my book you're not special it's linked in the description and it comes out on may 5th yes then follow us on socials and then that's it right that's it we're outie bye don't blame me is a production by me executive produced by melissa demonts camera operator amanda lechner and music by ryan hunter and giacomo picasso your playlist might get you through the workday but have you ever wondered how your ancestors spent theirs what work helped them build a life how did they adapt as the world around them changed

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