Don't Blame Me! - SYNT: A Work Trip, a Height Difference, and a Trip to New York

Episode Date: September 19, 2023

Meghan and Mats go on a work trip together, and Meghan can't stop talking about Melisa. Their height difference shocks everyone. Back home, Melisa's writing group is going great, and she's on track to finish her pilot this week. Then, Meghan and Melisa plan a trip to New York, but they're trying to keep it clean. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

hey hey hey oh i have to sneeze that's you hey very powerful thank you did you feel in your nostrils do you feel a sneeze in your nostrils some really strong ones i do it's not it's not usually fun it's like painful oh no i know those ones no i didn't feel it there that is that's like i feel like there's water up your nose yeah that was probably one of the worst covid um when i had covid like active covid the worst fucking symptom was just constantly feeling like that burning sensation like there was water up my it was constantly all the time what a unique and cruel thing well some people need to be punished and that was your punishment what if i actually believed that and said it and then i

would say amen amen under his eye and so it was me trying to remember which one of the real religions or the one from you know other entities from handmaid's tale that's a book oh you know what i read that book in like middle school too young i loved it when you told me about that i was like megan why yeah i don't know there's a lot of things i was too young too young well it's tuesday and yet we're doing we're seeing you because last tuesday we said we'll see you next tuesday and today we'll say we'll see you next tuesday but right now it is the tuesday that we said we'd be seeing you last beautiful I took my Adderall who knows when it'll kick in so you said you had some things to share oh because I was saying I was talking about you a

lot and my favorite subject I was at this thing and I just this won't be new information to like anybody but wow holy hell it is like so hard to be um a woman in a male dominated space was i one of was i a professional woman in this dominated space no no i was not a professional woman it's in this like it was a tech sort of thing and when i most i couldn't decide if i was offended that people didn't assume i was in tech or if i was like would have been offended that they assumed i was in tech but there go on i talked so much about myself to um the people who would just approach me and insist on talking to me for an extended period of time until moths would appear and then they would disappear oh i wonder why they were approaching

you i have no idea but the someone who spent like 40 minutes trying to like explain to me like how youtube works and i was like i know i i told you this is like what i do and they were like yeah i really want to like get into it and verbatim like when you know the worst part is like when you're making fun of someone to their face and they don't realize and you're like okay this isn't even fun anymore because like you're not even getting it but they were like we're not playing the same game yes they were like no i like yeah i was i've i wanted to continue today it's like i love i got really into a couple creators and i said let me guess jay paul and gary v and they were like how did you know and i'm like sir i'm insulting you to your face

so um i talked about the podcast a lot and these people and you were i talked about you but the the funniest part of it all was that i was never alone when this was happening to me i was just with other straight men who were like who had gotten a sense of my personality very quickly And we're like, Oh, she's fine. And I can just laugh from afar without intercepting. And so that became even more frustrating because I'm like, Oh my God, save me. And they're like, this is just so funny. Like, I just love hearing this. Like, this is just, it's just hilarious. Um, and it was just such a wild ride that I just have to say a shout out to the women who have to work with these because like, I got to make fun of these people to their face and they didn't pick up on

it but you know I'm sure if we were co-workers they might have had they might have taken some issue with it or I would have had like workplace politics and but my god you all are so strong because just the way that I wanted so badly I was like you are all not smart and um it was just like um it was it was an interesting time to see how different I am. And we went to a month of like a work retreat after for like a day. And, uh, there was a wine, a grape stomping competition. And I was the person who like, you know, you like take your hand and you like push the grape mushy liquid through the, the, the sip, the sieve, and then it goes into like the jug. And so they said this most important role.

And I took that job so seriously. I was head to toe soaked in grape juice. I got a t-shirt because they were like we got a mvp like you fucking bled out for this i was so into it um and then we saw bees and there's a gold beekeeping thing and i asked so many questions um but i like that my name means honeybee honeybee diamond cute honeybee miracle diamond wait where does well the miracle is part of melissa so so what is honeybee no it miracle was we're all named m's for that stand for miracle no yeah but if your mom is going to put an order of the meaning of your name hers and like you know linguistically where what's the order i think miracle first yeah i think so too miracle honeybee diamond also because when you say honeybee it sounds like

honey honey you be a diamond honey be a diamond um so uh i like you know was getting along with everybody like I'm social very personable and there got to a point where we're on the final night and I don't even know how it came someone was talking about space and I said kind of to myself but out loud I said you know sometimes I get like really sad like knowing that like I've never couldn't go to space and one of Maz's co-workers just looks at me and goes what and everyone goes silent and I'm laughing so hard Maz goes wow you guys are really getting to know her and I was like I this is so embarrassing I can't believe I said this out loud but they thought it was funny um but yeah it was uh it is it is no matter what where i'm at i know that the people

i gravitate towards are all in the same profession in the same field so i found the creatives immediately um and then i found um the uh marketing girls and then i found social media and i was like cool we're all here i am i found people i'm around i'm around my folk because this is we are we can speak the same language but you stay away from the pr people yeah pr is scary they are they are anyone who works in pr like you can't be you know that statement is true and also you tell someone who works in pr that they're scary that is a compliment it is because like they're not doing it on accident um so that was yeah and i just have to say like no matter how much money and how much intelligence someone has they think that that makes them like a desirable like suddenly

then like they can skip the line on how to flirt how to whatever it is it was so like no no no no no I you need to take a seminar a class you need to learn how to listen to be kind to stop crushing your water bottles as you're drinking them like where you know the people who do that yeah it's just like this is giving bad vibes so well i'm glad you had a okay time remind me to send you the inst because some people just immediately followed me on instagram oh my gosh i have to show you some and also some of them need to get a little bit better at the facetune because i go that is that is not you they have enough money to hire a professional photographer you don't need to use the app on your phone which i know you work in the space

but like get a professional one person it's as if they knew my what the worst possible thing they could do to their photo specifically for me guess what they did to edit their melissa they made this neck wider than their cranium like their neck is bigger than their skull it was like it was a little rock on a giant tree trunk it's as if like to be confused with the city in arkansas i think there's also a little rock in california too and there's equal rock but like i was just like of all the things to do you thickened up that neck you thickened up that neck um but uh there are like two security guys there who like moths really got along with and they liked and the second i met them like they were one of the

first people i met and so anywhere i went like if i was alone for more than 0.5 seconds they would appear out of nowhere in a golf cart if they saw someone talking to me they're like do you need us to help i'm like no i'm totally fine and i was saying i was like oh i just got caught with some like random dude just trying to flirt with me they're like who where and i was like you guys i'm look around look at these people here i'm fine first of all i can snap them all and then also i can run circles around them comedically and intellectually like they don't even know what hit them um but it was like sweet they were very much trying to protect me and i was like you should protect them like these men these these men have never had one ounce of whole milk or

calcium in their lives like they are fragile fragile little ones and yeah they've got that you know the it's the it's the don't see the sun kind of look i don't know what i'm talking about yeah it was it was interesting um i felt i don't even want to say like i felt like wow i feel like i'm the hottest person here i did the whole time i just felt so bad for the woman who they were and i was just like wow this is rough because at least like when they're like mansplaining how like internet works to me after asking me what i do like at least like i have not been hired at the same company and like it's not in my job title or like my email signature you know like at least there's a

little bit of suspending disbelief but i'm like oh my god you do this to your like co-workers so that was it anyways you didn't get to the part about me oh no because i talked about you on the podcast i was just like oh you've got a podcast with my friend and then i just kept referring and then i was like maybe i'll just like not say who this person's name is because um i want them to think i like have more people but then i also was talking with one of the cinematographers there or like i think he specifically did photo but um they were talking about how they do weddings and he was a white guy and he was asked they were asking when moths and i were getting married and i was like oh we're not

having a wedding wedding like i just not a fan of it and he i was asking if they after filming so many weddings what were they like and he goes oh my biggest takeaway after filming so many weddings like he's like white people we have the worst weddings like we spend so much money and like our weddings just suck he's like every other wedding i've been to that is not like a white person wedding he's like different music different food all of these other things but the the the cheered over he's like I can close my eyes and I can tell you exactly what you're gonna get at the other weddings I can come up with the entire soundtrack I have to like pretend that it's like totally creative and he's like and it sucks and it's just not fun and you're just like filming

people on the dance floor listening to Journey and it's just the same songs over and over and he's like I I can't like it's just it's not it and I was like fair and uh we were talking about how um uh the wedding you didn't go to but the wedding the when you get off the plane and they had the whole thing and i was like if you're gonna have a way if you're gonna spend tons of money on a wedding i want you to have a digital banner in the airport when you land like that's what it's and you're gonna spend a helicopter that's what i mean i'm like if you're gonna spend money on this like i need to know that you spent money and i need people who don't even know you to know that you spent money like make a fucking spectacle make a scene so

talking about you with that so it was wonderful thank you for making me a part of it and then i showed someone someone's asking the podcast and they're like oh is this your cover art and um i was like sitting down i don't think i'd stood up yet and they were like is this your friend and i was like yeah and they were like and that's you i was like yeah and they're like what and i was like what do you mean like you're not that tall and i was like i haven't stood up and we stood up and i was like exponentially taller than that person and they were just so they just thought i like my editing perspective was like very far off of us and the thing is you've adjusted it so that i'm closer to your height and i was saying i was like oh no this happens to us all the time

like people have no idea because i was like i have a short torso yeah yeah you can't tell but i was like like being like what the fuck are you talking about that's wrong and i was like oh you just have i haven't stood up yet and you have no idea how tall i am and i was like and you don't know how short she is so yeah it was a good time um we should uh i'm not gonna get bees but the reason why i did that bee activity was because of what i've told you prior which was maybe i'm just gonna get a beekeeping suit to protect myself from the beetle and do what i'm gardening and so i naturally i told everyone there that too and so when we found out about this thing everyone's like megan you have to go you can try your beekeeping suit and then i tried it on everyone's like what's

what's the verdict i'm like i could wear this i feel so safe i feel so protected so i think i'm gonna get one what had other people's bodies been in that bee suit i don't know there was like tons what i just don't like to touch things that other people's bodies i'm wearing clothes yeah but now it's touching my clothes yeah i you know you should think less there are some things that i'm like yeah megan don't do that that's weird but that's one of those things that like if i don't think about it i'm fine yeah so i when i'm on the plane i wear a whole like sweat suit over my clothes and then take off when i get to the bathroom in the airport to take it off and put it in a plastic bag and you have some you have some issues and i say that

with love i say that i love we've said i've said this off mic this is not me saying for the first time you know as i know yeah you've got some issues aware of my issues exactly um i me getting ready to go i felt so bad for the fucking uber who picked me up i was so sweaty it was so and then even on the car ride the uber ride back to uber ride to sfo no we dropped our rental car but the walk to get the plane on the way home walk to get the plane walk to get walk from the rental guard to get on the plane to go home we ended up like i took my meds i took my beta blockers i was like okay cool but like i didn't have coffee in the morning like we didn't have time and we land and it was like a hundred degrees. I'm wearing, I'm wearing like a t-shirt

and like yoga pants. And I have like my hair up and sunglasses on. When I tell you I have stacked the luggage and I'm just leaning my body over it. People kept like looking at me and then like tilting their heads, like make sure like, is she alive? Like, did she die waiting for the Uber to get there it was like when it gets hot I don't know anybody functions I agree it's so bad it's so bad anyways how was your weekend my weekend was good um last Thursday I boxed for the first time in a long time and excuse me didn't I tell you not to do it you did but now I've done it three time since then i'm fine but boy oh boy was i sore so sore body hurt everywhere in places i didn't know it could hurt and and i have to say like i've been working out regularly on my bike

and on my row machine and doing weights it was just boxing takes different muscles because you get emotional and then you start like you're thinking about thinking things and i was thinking about a specific person you can probably guess yep yep you get too into it uh-huh and and you know you're turning and slipping and rolling dipping yeah all of it hey that's kind of like my white girl shaming it is so um then on friday i know saturday i was so sore and i was like i want to take a bath and the previous weekend i had installed little things on my floor so that i wouldn't slip and now i so i had to you know i cleaned it up so i could take a bath which i don't like taking baths but i needed when necessary yes i needed to soak in some epsom salt because i had

already been in my massage chair i used my massaging shoulder thing that we both have like I had rubbed CBD oil on I was still so sore so I was like I gotta get in I start running in the bath water and I noticed that it's not filling up at all and I had a little lever like where it's supposed to be so I think that when the guys came and fixed the plumbers came and fixed the hot water they must have messed something up so then I was like I can engineer this to work because I don't have a little stopper or anything so yeah it's just a little lever lever yeah so I unscrewed the like drain cover are you doing this naked yes yeah that's about to get it exactly yeah when something goes wrong when you're in the like feeling

that's sick i'm already naked and vulnerable yes naked i had cleaned it naked and of course of course so i undid it and then i was like if i wrap some saran wrap around it very tightly did you walk into your kitchen in the nude yeah i mean i do that all the time anyway that's nothing new it's just it's just but imagine me with a screwdriver unscrewing naked naked with the drink thing yeah and then i had to clean it and then wrap i didn't use i didn't end up using some rain wrap but i used the wraps the other flex wrap stuff i gave you a carton of it because as i do because i order things in bulk um and i go back and then i screw it real tight because i was like it'll create a seal around the whole thing you went to

she knows how to do this shit perfect women got in took a nice hot bath i put epsom salt in it and then the next morning i woke up and it felt like nothing happened like as far like my body didn't feel like it had been worked out it was great and it drained fine and it drained yeah because then i unscrewed it and then took the saran wrap off and it was fine wow you really are a woman in stem like when i do it i attempt and then it becomes like there's i have a clear um display of the knowledge gap but no you really you just did it yeah i wouldn't even have known what to do well first i was like i was gonna put like a to-go container on top of it but it wasn't creating the seal hard enough oh okay because it wasn't it wasn't weighed down enough so and then

the way that the the the bathtub is slanted a little so there it can never do it and then i was like maybe i'll use like a mason jar and it still wasn't right and i was like i have to create a seal around the actual drain problem solving yes that's crazy impressive and then this week i've started my writing class i've been waking up every day around 6 30 and it's been going great i have you say that that's like ha i did it i did it it's been four days i will be done with my pilot tomorrow that i started writing on monday okay fine i will go to sleep early and wake up earlier you're selling me on it you're selling me on these working hours yeah and you know what i did today woke up did the writing class then i worked out showered and then sat

here with you bitch this used to be me before the pandemic this used to be that and you know what it is maybe and this is what i think it makes sense both of us are creative at night and i think part of the reason is because no one else is awake but if you wake up early and other people aren't awake then you still have the same environment yes but i i've done that before and i still don't do anything like i'll just get up and not do anything but i think it's the people being there and also i know you're like what if there's like somebody hot there and i was like who the fuck cares but it's all women so not everybody all the like which i didn't like it the other groups there are people of other genders there but that's all that's in my group there are some people that

still haven't showed up i don't know what they're doing kick them out kicked out they are they you couldn't miss like i think they get they actually give you the first week and then after that you can't miss anything but we're all just like today somebody was like i've never looked this rough on a zoom and i was like we all are just here just be happy that we're here yeah i would do that like i think about that with like people who go to um all girls schools and like people like no you're just like we just roll up to class and just like you didn't care like that so i was like oh i guess i'm sure it's less distracting well and you're a hetero yeah but i also think more specifically in the terms of like professional space i don't it's not about like attraction it's

it's about like being taken seriously yes yeah and like you know me i always dress for the job yeah and like not having it be like a bigger issue because like when we were like running for one of the things this weekend moths was like oh um we have to get on the ferry we ever get on the bus comes or like the the train whatever the train the thing that's taking us from one place to another place comes in half an hour and I was like in pajamas in the bed drinking my coffee and I was like half an hour like what and he was like it'll be fine I was like no no like I have to a whole hour to get ready yeah and I was like and like with love I was like it also is like it's not I wouldn't he's like we don't always do that I was like no I know but like those are my

friends whatever but like this is your co-workers and like it is crazy to like see that like I got more compliments on my engagement ring in the last like that I ever did and it was because like it made him look good and I was like whoa and I was like I don't think I was like you have to understand that like I have to look good because like this is for you like I'm a reflection of you and like not just personality wise but like I have to like look put together I have to like do all of that and we were walking and he was like seeing all of the other like some people had plus one some people like brought I also love that everyone kept saying so and so plus one but mine always just said, Mons, Megan. And I was like, I get my whole name. It's because me and the marketing

team, we got along very well. Um, but he was like, well, looking at this and he was like, damn, I like never realized that, like that actually like really fucking sucks. And he's like, there's a lot of things that like suck about being a woman that are really hard. And he was like, I didn't even realize that like getting ready for things that like you might not care about it or want to get ready for and don't reflect on you, but you have to be conscious of like how your appearance reflects on other people and i was like yeah and he was like that's a mind fuck so that is nice especially in a business sense um and a creative business sense because like despite being creatives like they still expect women to look a certain way yep that's cool so

are people from all over they're most new york-based yes it's new york-based so most of the people are from new york me and somebody else um is in this other person is in the bay area but other than that i think everybody is from new york so do you like know what they're writing i mean no people like set goals about what they want to finish but i don't know what they're actually writing today we did have a discussion because somebody was like stuck and they're right they're writing a novel most people are doing screenplays but most but this person was writing a novel and they were stuck and they were just we were like giving tips and stuff so i know that they're writing specifically a novel but i don't know what it's about and then somebody is writing

a drama and they were talking about how like it's a drama but then they can't help but put their own jokes in i'm like a lot of dramas are yeah funny best dramas yeah um and i said and they're like yeah but i just don't want it to come off corny and i said well just write down what's in your brain just put it down on the paper and then later go back and change those specific things that you think might be corny she's like that was a really good tip is there anyone here who you'd want to read leader i was gonna say though like you know not to judge a book by its cover but judging a book by its cover which is mostly just a vibe check is there anyone who like you're like i'd be interested what they're writing that you would want to like see but i guess you don't talk about

you can't really get a vibe talk about our specific things um and i'm really not i don't like and I mean this like in the nicest way but I don't like reading other people's things no I mean it's it puts a it's a difficult position yeah and I'm like I always don't I'm not good at giving specific notes on things I know that's not a strength of mine I can tell you if I like it or not and I can tell you what's working or not but I can't like I'm not good at structuring other people's things i'm the opposite i'm like good at specific about other like very detail oriented with other people's things um and i'm like that kind of in general with my i'm not a bigger picture or like thematically like something needs to change like i'd like change this little thing

but something else is off i don't know what it is yeah yeah yeah well i'm excited for you me too but i was like since i this thing is like 60 days long so i'll be in there for until november and if i'm working at this pace i can get so many like different things written you could also so i was gonna well i've been thinking that i'm gonna change i'm gonna turn my fan fiction that i've been writing for like 10 years into a novel anyway it's still going on though so i have to finish it um but uh i was gonna say i can like next week i think i'm gonna work on the outline for our thing oh and then send it to you so then you can do your pass on it and i can write something else like while you're doing your pass i can move on to the next thing no i love that i

think for your fanfic too specifically i think doing that as a novel and then selling it is genius because the current um a you can self-publish that because you have a built-in audience but also the um fanfic to self-publishing crossover is such a huge genre of said books yep that that it's like a double proof of concept you're crushing it okay i'm gonna like take some of those that energy and those vibes and um inject it i would prefer to take it in a capsule form but i'll just straight to the vein straight to the dome um that's impressive not that i doubted you at all just to make it clear for anyone i mean to be honest if i wasn't the leader i probably already would have bailed on this because like today i woke up 10 minutes

before i needed to be on because i'm supposed to get on there early anyway um and if i wasn't the leader i would have just slipped so well they know that like again like your leader vibe like your cult leader kind of cap like you exude you were born team captain versus someone like me mvp never gonna be team captain never gonna be team captain it's gonna be like i don't participate until i know that i can win or i can have fun doing it but like you're very good at that um kind of big picture stuff so lots of people count on you and then it makes it and it's a confidence boost maybe we should take a little new york i haven't been in a very long time

i'm fine a long time either you know anytime from not yet uh october or november i can do i don't do new york when it's hot because it is so smelly i don't do new york when it's hot nor snowing so that window snow doesn't really start until i know i'm just saying that window is very small so those are my times as well yeah I love a I love a fall and a spring I don't do the humidity no it's it's the humidity I hate it but it's it's the smell as someone who is like so scent sensitive I I can't and there's something like really grotesque about um the science in my mind is when it's humid the air is uh opaque and thick and you can it's like staying in the air and so then when there's smells those smells stay in the air and those smells stick on my

clothes my hair and which is actually what happens but like in my mind the trash is in my eyes the trash is in my mouth it's in all every orifice of my body and like i can't scrub it enough well imagine how i feel with my own issues not good is what i imagine but you know what i would love to go to New York with you because I think that you would not be um insisting we take the subway everywhere oh god no and that's what I need to see because I have I told you a horror story when I was like so when I was 18 17 18 like half of my friends moved to New York for college and I would go like visit that so when I had to I work most of the time it's be LA New York LA New York and I would go for work but I'm literally like 19 I mean probably the earliest age I went

I was like 18 or 19 and so I would be working you know Manhattan or Times Square maybe like financial district like what like just and my friends would all live in like Bushwick or other parts of Brooklyn Crown Heights and they would be like come see me and so I would have to take a goddamn fucking I'd have to take the subway from wherever I am in Manhattan all the way to Brooklyn and then have to take it back like by my and i got on one day one night at like i was not sober and it was like probably midnight or 12 or like 1 a.m they shut down the one train i knew that i had memorized that i had to take and then i had to figure out how to get from an up for the i was like eventually i tried two trains didn't work got went back up and i just called a fucking uber

and I was like I hate and like I'm traumatized and scarred from that because I can't do math nor can I do directions and then there's like letters like corresponding with that I don't like doing it by myself nor do I love doing it if someone can't tell me exactly what to do yeah same I love rules and direction like this whole thing of like you just like learn it like no I need explicit rules and I need someone to explain like I'm not I I'm not good with like the context clues or like figuring it out like give me a rule book yeah no thank you um i just think of i wasn't in new york but i was in dc and i was with my cousin brian and then melanie and some of brian's friends that i think lived in dc i don't know why else they were there

actually i do know why they were there for the aka convention that was there oh i talked about your sorority a lot too which i didn't know that they this happened in 2008 okay i did not know that the girls that were there were there for i didn't know they were in my sorority i thought they just were in dc and he they wanted to see him also these girls were like six three i was like i don't too tall like too much going on here we're on i like don't we're in different atmospheres yes yes i can't relate to you because i can't hear you yes um and we were we were just sightseeing in dc and we got on the train and somehow me and melanie just didn't make it on the train traumatizing yeah traumatizing traumatizing no that's and dc is also like

that's like even more unfair because people drive there so it's not like everybody does that so like not you can't ask any like it's not like everyone is like oh i know exactly what to do let me follow like no no and so many tourists of people who also don't know what you're doing and then you're following people who don't know what they're doing so we just went back on the street and caught a taxi and that is the kind of energy i want when i travel to cities like that yes and i love and i love and i love like the grid of dc because it's like it's literally on a grid and it's numbers and letters so you know exactly where you are you just need to get over to follow the street i was running on this was when i ran outside with heels on and i would get no

like actual like workout like jogging yeah no running and i ran down to like i would get up every morning and run to go get some food and then run back was that that is actually like when i see people down the street doing that and they're running and i see them running to like get food and then run back i'm like the control you have over your bowels is amazing like you're gonna eat and then or do you grab it and then i was grabbing and going and then running back with the food yep so like how long does it take you to like wind down are you like panting and eating food when you're done that's a little bit that was when my lungs were in better condition than are today that sounds terrifying for both of us at this current moment yes i mean it still wasn't

great then but they're better then than they are now wow yeah that's i've i think i've been to dc once that's when i had a six-pack you know what we all go through different times and different phases and we have different things that are important to us and right now the things that are important to you financially benefit you having a six-pack did nothing for but i worked in the fitness industry so it made sense actually you know when you were all you were about the bag from the beginning and that was just what respective what accoutrements will help me financially at the time quickly moved up to the manager the place i was working at

because you had no experience captain energy you're born with team captain energy they're like we're gonna give you a raise and you can be the manager and i was like great i'm literally not doing anything extra it's the same place where i was spray tanning people and that was just money in my pocket do it all at one place that is that is a time wow that's impressive that's but i wouldn't i'm not i'm not shocked at all you you you become the um even if you're not initially appointed team captain the chips fall people see they notice and then you get moved also the woman that was like my direct manager and then her sister and the sister's husband owned the building she she's another woman that was just obsessed with me for no reason like she

invited me to her home well it wasn't even her house she invited me to a cookout at somebody else's house and then she was telling me about her amazing you don't even know her yeah she's talking about her amazing hamburgers that she makes at eight i was like it's a hamburger but like she was like like wanted to hang out all the time and i was like we need to science needs to research your pheromones like what i don't know what it is i don't know but now that you say this this was another thing i was talking about you this weekend about how like some people just have um like leader energy where it is like and i was because i was saying i was like trying to like i didn't know what i was doing and i was like i'm just trying to look confused so someone will come

over and like help me and tell me what to do and i was saying i was like this is why i work with like one of my best friends like she has she has team captain like leader energy and i was like but you know if she needed help people would just be like no way like you know what you're doing here all the time and i was like that is which sucks yeah and so someone else is being oh i'm very much like that um and i was like yeah no she is too and i said i was like yeah she joined a writing group to like you know be held accountable and i was being like that's too early don't do it and then she did it and they she became a like the fucking moderator leader of it from the start and they were like oh yeah that would keep me going and i was like and it's keeping her going too yeah

and then i talked about um just we talked they were like shocked that they were like i can't believe like moths was because people were asking like how we met and they're like i can't believe he was in a fraternity and i was like oh he has such frat boy energy i know what i was like vibes is he giving off at work so no no but what the bigger question was i was like where did you all go to school like what schools did you go to because like what fraternity like we need to discuss this because like you do realize like he went to emory and also like if you went to like i don't know uh like the if you went to school in like louisiana like yeah you would be like whoa this is not the same this is a guy with like long hair and glasses who likes to read but i'm

like if he would if he went to lsu he'd still like that's still like frat like he gives such frat boy energy and so and i was explaining to them because i was like it depends on where you all because I mean a lot of them are like west coast and I was like think about and like people from people it's like San Diego and I was like yeah no not that vibe I was like think about like you know more those schools I was like but you have to remember like Mats was like like he played lacrosse like he was like a lax bro and I was like I was saying I was like but you know I always like to um tell like picture him being like I'm not like other frat boys like he's just like you know it's like the Wattpad where like you're at a Harry Styles concert and like you're reading a book in

the crowd and he's like pick her I want to talk to her I'm like that was like his energy like I'm like I give him shit and I'm like yeah I pretend that he like reads at frat parties like different and I was like he's like you know he's still like a fun party guy um and then we were then I had mentioned how I was in a sorority and people were like I was like I was like yeah it's weird that like I used to be like oh I'm gonna end up with a frat guy and like I was in a sorority and I was like and I dropped out my sorority was off when I end up with a guy who's like he's not like he's fratty in the sense of like the only kind of frat guy not the frat guy I would have wanted to end up with when I was in college but who I'd be like thank god if you're gonna like this is the right

vibe um and they were talking about how like how I think that one of them was talking about like how pointless it like most of them are and how like what they were they had like a friend or a sister who's in like a merit or academic based one and how they like promise all of these things about like the alumni and like all and it doesn't matter and I was like no it's because these are white sort and I was like my friend was aka and I was explaining I was like and they were like wait that's like literally what they promised all of us i was like no i know when she first already talked to me about it i was like wow so like this wasn't like an empty like first of all another sorority has done this and established all this and i talked about the difference in the rush

process and they were all like oh that's absolutely like genius and smart and this makes sense why you would then stay in it for ever and they were like that's crazy and i was like i know and i was like but you know it's not like we need to implement that because we can't be trusted you already have a leg up anyway no that's what i mean i'm like there's a there's no no fucking need uh and b i don't trust us i don't trust us when you get like when you get a bunch of fucking nasty nasty white women together and not even necessarily all but like my story wasn't all white women but i did a lot i was like oh i hate myself here i know like this is not this is foul this is foul rancid vibes um and then everyone's like isn't so-and-so

an aka and i go i'm gonna stop you right there every think of all the they all i was like all of them literally all of them i was like think of someone who's successful cool amazing that you'd like to be friends with aka i was like it's crazy and then i said about how i was like we found this tick tocker who we liked plot twist sister i was like there's not one singular person who we've like i like her and then i was like melissa always follows it up with you know what and i go of course she is of course she is so yeah i talked about you a lot thank you thank you you came back around to give me well i finally remembered what the other part was because like here's the most again i'm saying i talked about you all weekend like you're the only person i referenced besides

myself and moth um and so there are so many instances that i was like i can't remember my favorite that was the visual comparison oh because there's another woman who's very short apparently. And we had a photo of all of us together, but we're in the B suits. And one of the guys was like, who's the short one? And I go, I don't know. And he was like, is it so-and-so like she's the shortest? I go, is she the shortest? Yeah. Then that's her. And he was like, how are you not realizing like the height difference? And I was like, I don't hang out with people my height. Like I have no concept of people. I was like my friends I grew up with all shorter than me. And I was like, I have a couple of friends around my height, but I was

like literally the friend I see the most. I forget that we have a height difference until other people pointed out so i loved talking about you it was wonderful i talk about you all the time too and i've gotten to where i can say like if i'm talking about family i can say your name without people thinking that i'm talking about my sister because you're megan and i emphasize it and then megan and that is a wonderful distinction yeah and it's natural that's how she always goes right that's not how she yeah that's always how she she hates when people call her megan and i hate the opposite you'll always know i love it wonderful amazing fantastic shall we um let the people be let them be let them be oh and i do want to add somebody sent us a dm and was like maybe there's

enough people in the don't blame me community that will um get together and write they sent us a dm about that and i need accountability from strangers like real real strangers not people that know me on a different level than i know them we all need to be on same playing fields but if anyone wants to do that like yeah join the facebook group and like i saw that message too so like we if you have the same profile picture like i'll go with you um and if you want to join the facebook group and like i'm sure there are lots of people in the group in the community or even on patreon if you want to just put in a comment section or something um i'm sure people would love to do that along with you but um we're we just wouldn't be

able to organize yeah i just and i just know how my brain works i'm gonna be i'm gonna try to be like on and stuff and it's not gonna work no i will perform and it's i i was coming back this weekend being like damn i am exhausted i'm like matz is the one work like i was working but like he was like working working um but I was just winning people over I also met someone who we they're bi-coastal now I think um but we or no does he live in LA we have to be friends then we're your vibe and immediately as soon as I met him he started talking I go what is your sign and he goes Virgo and I go of course I need one of you come along come join come join he used to be a wedding planner in Atlanta. Okay. And, and the first, first few seconds, the first few seconds

of meeting him, I said the word, I was like, he was like, someone called someone, he was telling me a story. Like someone called someone else, a C-U-N-T. I mean, a C-U-N-T. And I go like, you're giving or you are? And he goes, no, you are a, and I can take a, you're giving. And I was like, I love how like within minutes of meeting each other, we're just saying like giving cunt, serving oh cunt and i was like whoa and i was like okay i'm just bonding with your i'm just saying the word cunt over and over um but yeah he's kyle's either gonna love him be incredibly threatened okay love a healthy competition all right well we will see you next tuesday goodbye

Bye.