Don't Blame Me! - Tangents

Episode Date: November 22, 2022

Our memory card crashed and we lost the actual episode, but here's a bunch of random conversations we had that were cut from the pods. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey y'all, it's Melissa. So we had a little malfunction with our memory card and lost the See You Next Tuesday episode. So please enjoy these micro conversations that we've had while we've recorded and they got cut out of other podcasts. Have fun! is there like a female centaur i think so hold on it's got massive titties why do we never really see like mythical creatures like that with like big dicks but we always see like big jugs oh she's stunning oh she's way yeah that's i'm loving the hair blowing through the wind you know what it's because i have no associate like

this association there is so far from mr tumness so uh cora cora somebody asked why are there no female centaurs according to me did you write this because this sounds no but this sounds like how you would have responded on reddit the reason behind no female centaurs coming to light is the highly patriarchal status of the centaurs the herd that drew the herd that generally presented themselves for battle were ready no what the herd that generally presented themselves for battle ready and probably that would be reason that hurt that herd would only portray that hurt punctuation that herd would only portray males so what you're saying is we need a league of their own movie but for centaurs when the male centaurs go off to war and we get to see the

female centaurs play baseball yes well i'm here for it get gina davis on it can you imagine a centaur centaur dressed as gina davis in a league of their own i can it's a really cute outfit god i love that i think she actually beyonce could tell her to jump off a bridge she probably would beyonce could probably tell a lot of people to jump off the bridge myself included you see that rihanna on our shit list but rihanna somebody had asked rihanna who their exact question was who would you want in fenty panties and uh rihanna said like beyonce and was like shy about it i was like aren't y'all in the same circle that's alarming yeah does beyonce not like you because i like you up until now so now say like she was like like like

like she doesn't know like she said it like how uh sarah paulson says rihanna yeah that's rihanna that does not look good for you it doesn't look good too like y'all are i mean you were on jay-z's music i think you still are on his music label Does Beyonce not fuck with you? That's what it seemed like to me. It's a question that I have. Right now, knowing that you fuck with Johnny Depp and that Beyonce doesn't fuck with you,

you have far more than three strikes in my eyes, but that's two and that second one was a big strike. You're fangirling over Beyonce. Something's not right. That's not a good...

uh-uh uh-uh someone get pr in their ass like you need to tell me that like chloe and hallie they they but you don't but i feel like chloe and hallie wouldn't fangirl like that's what i'm saying i'm like they have been in the industry like the the connections that they have to be like you you have to but i don't see them losing their mind it's like mama beyonce you what happened yeah what's going on here i think if you find the right trader joe's and you find the right time of day you go like there are some parking lots like they're fine but where that's near here none of them they're all gonna be the crazy ones there's one that's like the best of the area and if you go as if you go in like as

long as you don't go sunday past 11 a.m never go on a sunday yeah then you're fine like you're pretty much fine all times there i mean i would avoid regular los angeles driving times you should avoid which is um 8 a.m to about no it's like 7 a.m to about 10 a.m yeah whenever i do my grocery pickups i do them at like two o'clock exactly like you're solid from 11 to about 2 30 and once you get before and after no and then you gotta hold out until about um nine o'clock yeah yeah even my the trader joe's that i used to go to all the time that one's it's like smaller than normal no i don't like that one over there gotta figure shit out i trader joe's it's like city target yeah i wish that they had some type

of delivery but they'll never do it no because they're like fuck your unions why would we ever give you delivery right we wear hawaiian shirts and hate people but our employees are so nice they're so well we take advantage of them anyways well change this this podcast to be named the calls the calls are coming from inside the house the calls the calls are alive with the sound of because i need the attention to be on me i'm terrified of splinters it's like popsicle sticks don't have actual splinters in them because they're not like because you don't want like a baby eating a popsicle and get a splinter

as a granola child mine were wood what are they not made what are they actually made out of i like cardboard i don't know they're coated though no but if you cut them i use with scissors make it a little bit longer so then your toes aren't you have long toes um don't talk about my toe i have short toes that you do have long she's got vienna sausage short toes these are mine look like voldemort's hands and fingers like little sausages so yeah like legitimately canned vienna sausages and men love fat toes if anyone wants to pay us for pictures if you want a picture of my broken toe i'm accepting um money for this venmo venmo or paypal i love paypal moment they're owned by the same company so they're the same thing well no because my paypal

is actually i can pay with things online with paypal and um my paypal is connected to my bank account and my venmo's not and that's a lot of steps i have to take because right now my money's sitting there as matt said my venmo is not liquid it's just a pot i gotta pay out of so next time we do something and you pay well the last time we had a hot dog i don't think you sent me your money perfect but you can if you want no no melissa you someone sent me more money i have no clue how much it was so no i'm just joking no melissa i next time why don't you connect your venmo to like doordash or whatever you use and then you can just pay for stuff out of that that's what i do because mott's been getting all of our takeout okay well no i just

got two hundred dollars in venmo mons venmoed it to me and i was like why no because we we sold what did we sell we sold a tv very nice guy i like love when you're selling something on facebook marketplace and i just within a couple interactions and i go bloody when he came over yeah i was like i want to sell it to you like i like your vibe like you're giving you're like you immediately are giving me exclamation points the end of your sentences i'm i'm making a joke you're making a joke back i'm like we're vibing like i like you like i would be friends with you and um he paid in venmo which i'm like i'm not gonna be mad like seemed like a nice guy but he paid moths then moths paid like me back in venmo um and as soon as he brought me back inside moths goes great

guy and i go that was the vibe i was getting i don't understand why moths paid you in venmo when he knows that you can't do stuff with it why didn't he just like give you the money or send it to your paypal i think because he probably would have been like paypal i think you would do it now i told him this actually we actually talked about this yesterday no he was asking me why i didn't have the people who bought the table pay me in um uh venmo and i said the whole thing you can connect it to some things if i can connect my venmo to my paypal that will make it easier for me and do that okay you have to do it from paypal though yeah because the whole thing is paypal i can have business transactions you can have multiple cards there so if i'm paying

with paypal you can do that on vimo too i have my business and personal on there but you can you can't you can connect your bank account but you can't pay for things like you yes you can no no but like oh like it comes in as i got you i got or like regular payments for stuff like oh i'm going to like buy something from target online do you know what i mean like you it's more for like local business and transactions if you do it on your phone they might have it yeah i have i have i don't like buying things on my phone i don't either i like to see them on the big screen me too like i don't i need multiple tabs open i need to be able to use the coupon honey please sponsor this podcast i use you every day i love honey i love they sponsor podcasts yeah honey

honey honey honey honey i have other we have other brands that we want to sponsor us too but we're not going to include it here right now because honey this is like your individual plea this is your moment saving money constantly and i also like reverse image search stuff and i need to do that on it's always better on my computer to know if this is getting the best price are there worse reviews on another website so i'm sure you were all enthralled by that segment i don't even know how we got here because i was saying how are people who are so gorgeous and gave great advice i know exactly how we got here you said gams we were talking about feet and then you said you can send me payments through okay paypal i'm glad you're here so

you can trace the um not straight line through my uh psyche that one was a cold shiver okay i can feel the difference i was like i'm about to fucking get you a shot of salt water went from like i felt it go down my spine and then i shivered it's different i know i know i know i know just it's three cold it was three in the last couple minutes i need some salt but that was cold i'm cold the two other ones weren't okay and what iodine tablets i can take one of those if i wanted to make you nauseous everything makes me nauseous i've started doing everything liquid now like most every vitamin everything is just liquid oh that's that's like literally the exact opposite for me that's i think it's because i got that after that

salmon bone stuck in my throat i can't do money biscuits liquids in general though where's that girl do you think she's still in the barn no i don't think she's i think she stopped listening i think she did too and then left is a bad comment about choices yeah we got a lot of those during the pandemic i know i'm glad we weeded them all out me too because like we still have random ableist assholes sneak through but now it's like at least we weeded it was like the same people during um black lives matter i was like i don't know how you ended up here but like i'm so sorry to report to you you're incredibly lost or you have really bad reading like and listening comprehension skills and at this point

i don't remember where i was going with oh i was like got it yeah nice agreed yep yep okay oh they were they're all the reason why the facebook group is locked down so you have them to thank the people that still aren't in sorry everybody go your parents it's very good on them i also just like to do i don't think that they kind of push me i'd be like i want to do that no i'm like moving around all the time too well that was about money yeah they got money and look at your social skills yeah but also i'm like if i lose a friend i'm like okay whatever yeah literally so that's like it has its good things but also like i see some people as disposable yeah i know but other people anyone who doesn't see like they're just wrong

it's my favorite trait about me is that i just forget people exist it's so nice or i do and i'm just like i don't feel like working this out because like i didn't like you to begin with yeah too much effort yeah if i don't have any desire to work on it that's i've heard enough that's enough for me i'm out moth is gonna be devastated he kept like missing the time frame to buy them i forgot and then i thought somebody because i thought on saturday i thought somebody was gonna hit it because it was at the highest it's ever been and they didn't and then i bought one yesterday and so they want the official i know they said they they haven't released did they release it now i

know this morning it wasn't officially yeah it was while we were sitting oh wow at some point um california wow could have been us yeah we could have become the people we hate billionaires well actually technically no after taxes you're not a billionaire once uh the cash was 961 and then when you do 25 for taxes yeah you already weren't a billionaire i wouldn't have taken the cash out of done the installments 19 when i started dating a little over three 20 minus three i can't 22 he is 21 okay well i was just going to do the math huh what's the math 18 he was 19 18 she was 19 but he was 17 because it's over three years they were friends they've been best friends since

they were 17 she was 17 he was 16 okay wait am i confused i don't know how math works but they haven't been dating since i don't know what the question i don't either hold on so so they've been 21 they were friends a year before they started dating a little over three years or two years before they started dating so they were friends two years and then they started dating but so two years ago no three years ago he was 18 but she said over a little over three years ago so he was 17 we don't know when the we don't know when the birthday is that was my question yeah so it could be like say they just turned 21 like two weeks ago then maybe but like if it was dude numbers i don't know how people who have number brains like work like when i tell you like it's like

my brain is like it's like empty like it's like hello hello like it's an empty hallway like i can't even i can't even figure out how they work because when you throw in like birth that part when mox is like oh we're like a little like you know sometimes we're closer in age than others i don't like that like it's fine but like it adds confusion to math which is already so fucking confusing for me like my parents used to say that me and Megan were 24 months apart and then I actually did the math and it's not right because I was like like right now she just had her birthday in October so right now we're a year like number wise we're a year apart but like for most of the year we're two years apart I it it is anybody else who's not good with math or is

just calculate like there are some things that like yes the like the metric system is to blame but then there are other things that i'm like this is just not fucking fair like it's not fair that like i'm a year apart with like we're one year apart in age but like not in actual days yeah like no it's like because she i was born in 86 she was born born in 87 but i was born at the beginning of 86 and she was born at the end of 87 so it's like it's not when it gets to february we'll we will be like number wise two years apart but right now we're not it's i hate it so much because like the only way when you're bad at math the only thing you can do is memorize and so then when it becomes like oh no well it is time is relative it's like no no no there's one right answer

apparently and like if this i can't my brain can't keep up okay so do you haircut too yeah but i got like oh very not what's very not when like a piece of hair that had like it might happen when your hair is curly but a piece of hair that like have fallen out of your hair oh but then it didn't actually fall out and then knot it with some of your other hair that's called a fairy knot oh yep that is that's what i pick out um with my finger combing before i shower with my hairs yeah maybe because i mean especially when the product traps it and you're like oh like because i was saying i was like i brushed my hair um detangled it in the shower and i was like holy shit i lost so much hair and i was like oh well when there's product it can't fall out so like

that's literally been a week and a half of hair so i felt a little bit better but it was still you have a lot of hair on your head i have a lot of hair and it's very fine but i definitely have lost more hair since coven yeah i fucking love filling in those little bubbles i do it electrically so i don't feel good yeah i i don't i don't like that i love my love a nice juicy pen as me person who loves technology things yeah but first and foremost you're from the south and you gotta you gotta get up there and you gotta you gotta start you gotta you gotta do this is so offensive you gotta do those votes i mean remember i told you remember i had the audition for northeast arkansas and i was like

there's no way i can do it i can only do one oh sugar even northeast arkansas would be closer to kendall but i can't talk like kendall's accent without just impersonating kendall like oh my god and then i'm just like doing i'm actually doing masa's impersonation of kendall that's all that was pretty good though i know he's i mean he he had he was practicing rears she loves it when he does it to her too like she thinks it's hilarious yeah all right that's it see you next tuesday