Don't Blame Me! - Transparent Like a Ghost

Episode Date: August 8, 2023

In this podcast, two friends share their stories about the ups and downs of life. In this episode, Meghan talks about her experience pretending to be a nanny for a day and getting attacked by "seagulls". Melisa, on the other hand, had a terrible weekend after her external hard drive crashed. But her weekend was turned around when she had a creative epiphany and visited a cute coffee shop. She also found Meghan a friend on TikTok. Join Meghan and Melisa as they laugh, cry, and share their stories about life. You never know what you're going to get with these two, but it's sure to be entertaining. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

hello and welcome to a brand new episode of see you next tuesday we are recording this live on august 1st which is a tuesday and you're gonna be hearing this on august 8th which is a tuesday hope you enjoy wow i loved that it's it's melissa without dentures that's what it sounds like you're old that would have been more hair oh actually that's a different noise yeah someone in my life definitely had dentures because that voice as soon as you said that i go welcome to cnex tuesday yeah i don't know i'm looking at the camera i'm performing you're acting like me well what's so wrong with that well i'm one of a kind that's true i'm two of a kind i don't know um we're just gonna catch up and chat and talk and stuff and i wanted

to tell a story yesterday on don't blame me and the most was like save it so now i'm gonna save it and i mean i did say so now this is this is stories we've been waiting for i hope it does not disappoint so um this past weekend or yesterday sunday well nope okay so this past weekend because it was not yesterday either it wasn't even monday so this past weekend um we did like an outdoor at a bar kind of i guess it's a bar like a brewery kind of outdoor sort of thing because i i'm about to say there are kids there so kids can't be at bars but breweries are yes brewery they can be at um did they have food there yeah did they have was it like at the place or like you would like go to a taco stand yeah actual breweries don't have food there oh i forgot what

the law is but yeah interesting that's why i asked so then we could clarify what this yes yes yes well these children did not look a phase because they're all between the ages of two and three um and so we go and it's you know outside and this is my brother-in-law's birthday and i they have a lot him and his wife have a lot of like shared friends who we've met over the years verse and then like you know he's his own solo friends but mons and i have always been dating for a long time so we know a lot of people there but the newer additions now are parent friends and friends with friends with little itty bitty children so they have skeet ball skeet ball they have scat ball no they have ski ball how do you even spell it two e's

oh two e's oh i know but like who how would you know right uh so they have ski ball and um there's a buy one honestly i'm like really i like love it it's like one of my favorite it's so fucking fun um but so there's like a lot of adults there and then there's three kids and their respective grown-ups so i'm hanging out with my nephew he is eating rice and beans and he immediately just comes and sits on my lap and i'm like i'm gonna get so messy and it's fine i like you know lay it down but so i'm like hanging out with him and his mom is very pregnant she is giving birth next month um and you know it's a dead birthday so it's like monson are like we are taking over aunt and uncle fun role um and uh i think a lot of the other parents there

were like oh my god perfect i was wearing overalls and i literally told monson car i go how many of them do you think asked if i was the nanny who before they were swiftly corrected by the family being like that no no no no um because i was giving nanny energy and so we're like running around we're playing and we're playing skeeball and my nephew he has a whole he's been to this place multiple times so he knows that he needs a dollar and he knows he needs to put the dollar into the thing and he's gonna token out and he puts token in that's his favorite part like he doesn't really care as much about that he like loves to get the token and put the token in um but when we play he goes for one on the far side so he can come up next to it and

kind of just put it in and he knows how to roll it underhand and we're having it it's fun whatever so then the other some of these parents are just like oh she's playing with him we'll like let our ones come along with her mods was like are they gonna pay you i was like that's the same thing happened to me at who was it amaya no mj's birthday party yeah yeah um where i was like the higher disney princess without stress um and so we're we're doing that they don't know how to play and so suddenly i have two two-year-olds who are picking up ski balls overhand throwing them as hard as they can i'm like when you said that he was allowed to play with this yeah i was already frightened well he's a baby genius that's true and um he's also

if he had like started to throw like i knew that he knew how to do it um but if he didn't i would be like no no we're stopping immediately but so these kids like i'm trying to like help them out i'm trying to help them out but i'm also trying i'm not touching them because i'm like last time i went to your daycare y'all got me sick so i don't know where you've been um and they're very cute very very very adorable kids and they're almost like a full year younger than him so like they're young young um and i'm like i don't know your parents well enough for like if you get hurt like i will get in trouble and like i don't this is awkward i don't want to you know mess around with this so finally one of the other parents like i think one of the dads comes over and like

is like trying to like help and they're laughing and like moth is helping and then his brother is like okay let me help because i was like this is a good one because i would already yell come get you're cute i know true um but and my nephew he's like i'm like teach them how to play and he's like no and i was like fair he's like this is chaos and i don't want to be involved in it so then um they realized that the fun part is what he agrees with is the fun part is getting the dollar putting the dollar and getting a token so he has been i have some money from his grandmother um my mother in law and we've been we're given it and he's doing all this kind of thing and these little children who I don't know come to me and they go can I have money and I go no I don't know I was

like ask your parents and they were like do you do you do you have and like one of them goes to my pocket and I go can't you get your hand out of my pocket no I do not have money for you and then finally I pull out one of someone else like hands me like a a dollar or whatever and I lift the dollar out of like the front of my overalls these kids start jumping up and down like like seagulls like it's like i have i have a sandwich i'm prating around i've oh so it was an actual actual seal no no but these these children were the seagulls okay and i was was the picnic i was the beach sand i was i was the delicatessen of whatever sandy sandwich you have at the beach and it was kind of like it was like in in in um that you know the reference of mine

mine mine mine you don't know but that's fine but i didn't mention it because there you go um she gets it now maybe um i like i'm lifting it up i'm holding it above my head i'm like running around in circles i'm going ah these kids are jumping i've never felt more powerful in my entire life my nephew dying of laughter the other two literally about to like explode so upset i could not stop laughing because i was like you you can't slaves to capitalism you crazy little children are losing your minds over a dollar and it was the funniest thing in the entire world and like mott cannot like everyone is dying who's like standing there by there and i have no idea what the parents of these other children like looked over and saw but i imagine

they went from being like oh look she's babysitting our children to she's tormenting and i it was so fucking funny and i loved it i forgot about how when i was at mj's birthday party first of all audrey's birthday was the day before birthday party was the day before and my sister megan who's mj's mother was like hey anybody here can come to mj's party too she was just like joking but people ended up bringing their kids to the next day and keep in mind mj was turning 11 i believe and audrey was turning eight yeah or nine not a big crossover yeah they're not in the same school and so um then people were bringing like their little children too yeah like they're the brothers and sisters and like i have a lot of

nieces and nephews i'm fine playing with them i'm fine playing with other children if i know them but like there are certain things that i can do with my own nieces and nephews that i can't do with other people's children and they'll also take like things that i say like as being mean but that's just the like the way we talk to each other so i was like y'all come get your kids like i'm not what like i am a big kid but i'm not watching y'all's kids for free for at all yeah no at all truly you don't need the money no and then i bought my nieces and nephews some icys and then these other children also expected me to buy icys and i said go tell your parent yeah that's not my responsibility no and like that was like so there was like one where like you know my

nephew would like he'd like run around and then like we would like intercept and catch him and like you know pull him like throw him upside not throw him upside down but like do the whole thing and one of the kids like ran up and was like arms extended and i literally said to him i go i do not know your parents well enough to this and the mom was like oh you know worth a try and i was like but like I don't what if someone knocks into me like I drop your kid like anything like that and I'm like thinking like I'm also thinking of like my brother and sister-in-law I'm like I don't want to make your these are your friends like that's just I'm not trying to you know do any do any of this and mix any up with this um but yeah apparently like one of the parents like said

to monster like oh my god she's she's so good with with kids and he was like yeah you know like and he was just like he's like no you were but like it was the only time someone's ever said to me he's like where i found it like you know kind of like okay but that's still like okay she doesn't have to be like yes can she sit yeah can we not do this um but you know it i was like in in a different life i've said i would be like a preschool teacher or um a nanny um but i'm like maybe i should just start babysitting and like just charge so much money you need to charge a lot of money for you to be satisfied well yeah i don't think it'll be the money that you want unless you're going to babysit for some celebrities and i don't think you want that i don't want to do

that right i just think that yeah no it's true i want to like go back to like when i was like in high school and like it would be like a you would get hired to babysit at a party so like there would just be like you would get paid to do what we do for free you know what i mean to like be the person who wrangles all of the kids and just keeps them from not dying and entertains them and then you like get all the same food and like drink and you know enjoy be merry and you walk some money i used to do that with um someone who's in our patreon group shout out she just got married i saw it's gorgeous gorgeous how was your weekend what'd you do terrible do you want to talk about it or no yeah okay

my heart i don't know what kind of oh the worst kind of terrible you're fucking kidding you need to go to a rage room so hard drive that i used for just between us crashed while i was editing something and i was angry so angry that i didn't do anything that i was going to do so you're supposed to do what happened when that's like actually the remedy if you go on wiki how to do this it's like you have to have a mental shutdown i ordered a whole bunch of chinese food good and found a place that had vegan shakes oh flavor uh it was cookie butter but i don't think they put enough of the cookie butter flavor in it yeah and so just has tasted like vanilla just sweeter but it's still good yeah i would have preferred to get a chocolate one but it was still

good tasty um it did the job uh and i was and got some chocolate what else did i get i know i got some more stuff from that chocolate that chocolate bash place that i've ordered chocolate from before delish yeah um and just wallowed in my weekend wallowing um which i am glad because i was going to a birthday party and i looked at the pictures and it was like 60 people inside absolutely not um and then i did miss out on my um cousins did go to the beach but i was like i don't feel like driving to malibu the cousins um that you like um but i didn't feel like driving to malibu so no um it's a lot it is especially when you're in a bad mood no it's they're like you can drive to us i was like yo i'm still in santa monica like you're trusting me on the you're trusting me on

pch after the trauma that i've just gone through absolutely no i and also my stomach was messed up the whole weekend too so i'm impressed with you because the when i had that i mean it's happened me multiple times but the one time that will always just be at the top of my i laid like a starfish on my floor and just stopped for like six hours straight that's what i wanted to do and i was like you become numb and you're just like yeah what the fuck do i luckily a lot of stuff was backed up on dropbox oh that's good because i have to send it to um uh coco but the final edits aren't the final edits are all on the hard drive no it's so bad yeah well r.i.p to it i know i still have my hard drive that crashed because

i'm convinced one day it'll work i've that it's sitting right there because i'm like which one is it the cheap one on top because i have one of those ones break and that's why i told you to start getting the double ones remember that's what the bigger thicker ones are the double ones and those even if one crashes the other one is backing it up yeah it yeah i lost my bake miss yeah it was awful yeah so i i feel your pain there's actually no there's nothing comparable to it like yep there's not like it's just it's awful it's like doing all of your homework a semester in advance and then losing all of it yep so i was i was very mad i'm glad you treated yourself with foods and nourishments if not i

would have been on the ground yeah that's fair i had to distract myself no that's good yeah i did take a real big nap too yeah well it's it's emotional you have to you have to recharge because you have to have you eventually the worst part is you have to power through yeah and it's like well i can't do that because i'm so upset yep damn i'm sorry thank you but i'm glad you had a breakthrough yeah i did it's like really big now and i'm really excited about it um and i'm like i'm really excited about sitting down and just getting to work and then yesterday i found the well i can't get take credit for this my friend credit no one here knows my friend kristin who is a podcast producer found i had reached out to her because i haven't

seen her since like 2020 um and we had we're facetiming and i was like hey what are you up to and she found the cutest coffee shop for us to go to that has incredible outdoor seating gorge they have like the roaster in the coffee shop and there's also a little like shopping area of things to buy too it was beautiful and she was like we walk in and she goes how do you feel about wearing a mask and i go i am still 100 for it and she goes me too but i picked this place because they have outdoor seating do you want to sit outside i said yes and so i'm gonna add her to the old fucking star of a human yeah damn that's so nice because very rarely are the social experiences with people like this yeah and so she said she hasn't really

been doing anything so i said i'll add you to like hey i have someone else throw throw her in yeah and speaking of friends i also tagged you i don't know if you saw oh my god i wait i thought i dreamed that i forgot to go back and see what that was i must have looked like in the dead of night wait that's actually so fucking funny i fully didn't even realize that this was like a real thing that happened yes yeah you fucking tagged me in like someone's comments saying like megan beat like this is who you should be friends with and they responded yes oh my god i've been following her i'm mortified since the beginning of the of the pandemic oh my god she let out that she had this video that went viral where it was like i forgot exactly what it

was but her video was like it was like people of color going back and forth about how we're going to like ruin white men's lives and she made a video and she said as an asian woman i will take them take the white men because they love asian women and procreate with them so that they uh no longer have a bloodline essentially i don't know if you remember this it was huge i know i know i'm sure i've sent yeah but it's been you know 2020 it was when it happened and um she's really pretty yes and the thing is she's also queer so like she really she's really doing charity yes good god um but and i was uh she had uh earlier in the pandemic she had a uh like survey up to find her a partner and i was trying to hook her up with shireen

because i think they would be good together oh i love that yeah but uh shireen stone but shireen never filled out the survey even though i sent it to her multiple times shireen and i have a lot of things in common and follow through is one of them and uh but um her name is emingalabay but like there are only 33 comments on this tiktok and melissa comments on it i think you should be friends my bestie and tag me megan and then they respond is it to hate our parents as a collective and then she goes melissa goes well one of them and i've been on the search for someone who can relate to her and i've also thought you were cool for a while so it's not just based on this video and the creator likes both of those comments like i'm like okay i'm gonna save this

she's in la she lives in la oh my god and i she's on our short list too for where i had like people to have on the podcast yeah no she seems very cool yeah so her i'll watch her content and see if i'm cool enough to be friends with her tiktok name mingala bay and um yeah you have we have same idea we have the same idea i can tell from i can't even say the tiktoks i'm watching without even the audio yeah i'm going i'm making a face about her stitching a video and then it cuts the stitch and she's making the same face i am she does have cats which is a negative but i think she more than makes up for it okay no that's great so um this is my i mean i already made my formal ask i comment on a lot of her videos to be honest um but this is the first one that

i've had like a major hit on mortified absolutely mortified no there are like there's enough there's a couple people on tiktok who i'm just like i know you live in la and like we are like mutuals like and like we should be friends but i also like i need to like get my vibe in check like i need to make sure that i'm not because like there are some people who are like i'm not looking for any new friends like my life is like so full and vibrant and I'm like you know I gotta I gotta go in with that mindset yeah that like there's some tough competition oh I forgot her and her friend actually share her account okay I was just trying to find my I was like oh my friend Michaela that's who I should also be friends with and I'm like did Michaela block me and I'm like trying to

i can find i i'm think i think my health account got taken down i don't know but i think this is their they have a backup yeah i'm like where are you what happened you notice all these people's names start with the name as well maybe that's the key maybe that's what it is supposed to be yeah so um i'm gonna invite her to be on the podcast great because so far that's worked out wonderful with cammy and i think she'll be a great addition she might be a little even more radical than we are i i you know i could i could be right i could be radicalized um and yay wonderful and i didn't have to join bumblebee ff yeah so we're mortified though no i'm still terrified and then maybe i can still hook her i don't know

if she's in i think she might be poly single oh single or poly i'm looking for yeah a person yeah so still try to hook up with shireen too okay but then shireen and i if we become friends trina i had a conversation like trina you can't fuck this up because this is a new friend so i'll wait or i won't pick like cousins i'll just lie normalize lying normalize lying well if you have friends for us don't tag them oh my god that's fucking rich no you can tag melissa no i'm saying i can tag people that i want to be friends with but they don't tag other people because i need to vet like i've already vetted her yeah you tag people you think that don't tag them just dm us oh yeah dm us and then

i can and then i can go and look i can vet for myself i can't actually facts like i am if i'm waiting for someone like people will tag me in people who i go no because it's like i know them and they know me and no. Yeah. No. It is fun though when someone tags me in something and I go, this is crazy. I know this person. And it's like a ha ha he he not like a he.

Ooh. So. Anyways. Alright. Well, we will see you next Tuesday. Love it. You did the circle back finger. Melissa, this isn't filmed. So why would you

wrap me up? Because I saw it and You did it. You said it in the last See You Next 2C as well. I am all about just making comments that go along. As you see, I'm all about transparency now. She's a fucking liar. That's a lie. Hey.

It's a bold-faced lie. I am. I won. Even though I cut out the reference, I made an apology, a public apology to my cousin. First of all, it wouldn't be transparent if you kept it in. and then no okay because it was a lie okay because then i would have kept the lie in and then people may not have heard my apology fair because this is cleaner because i cut it out and i still said it i'm gonna tell you something about that after and then two i love

ghosts and they're transparent and three i just snitched on you for doing the wrong thing we do love a snitch in our favor snitch in a favor but no but also you would never snitch on me if it was if it wasn't like a to me about me no no you know what i mean like if someone else would be like what are you like i don't know someone said do you know if someone stopped on the street and said and they looked a little intimidating and they said do you know megan ranks and you're like never heard of her you're like what do you want with her i'd be like why yeah why like i just have some questions no bye um i uh there's this one barstool podcast that i watch because i'm desperate to give them views so um they leave barstool got it um chicks in

the office everybody give them views so they leave barstool dave portnoy like literally like went at one of the girls and like cyberbullied her and made her made t-shirts about it like her literal boss what are they what do they do fran and rhea they do like pop culture kind of stuff they're not the two gals that um troll yeah no okay because i really enjoy i know you fucking do because i know you um but they have one of their i think he's i think it's the title's producer um but um they were like talking about they have like a weekly watch report they were talking about like things that they were watching and randomly one of them like i mean it's fran ryan then this the guy interjects and asks if they've like seen this thing and they're both

like no why i just have to do what you're talking about he's like no i was just just asking and apparently it was like very fucking weak like it was just like why would you like interrupt the flow of this and it was just like i i just wanted to he cut it out of the edit when they were like don't cut it out and so now they just keep referencing it and bringing it back up so he's like i tried my best to cut it out so we can pretend that never happened because you were right it was like really weird for me to do that and they will like not let him great live it down and so they just keep following up with that it's reminding me of that terrific hope i leave barstool anyways bye-bye