Doomed to Fail - Ep 49: Consensual homicide: The true story of cannibal Armin Meiwes

Episode Date: September 18, 2023

We're kicking things off with a glass of Chianti and the story of German cannibal Armin Meiwes - you can find anything on the internet these days - and even in the early days, you could find someone to eat and/or find someone to eat you. There's a lot of weird stuff out there, we're glad you're here with us and not being eaten by a software engineer. Image via the NY Sun & AI Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doomedtofailpod/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/doomedtofailpod  Youtube:  https://www.youtube.com/@doomedtofailpod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@doomed.to.fail.pod Email: [e-mail]  Join our Founders Club on Patreon to get ad-free episodes for life! patreon.com/DoomedtoFailPodWe would love to hear from you! Please follow along! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doomedtofailpod/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/doomedtofailpod  Youtube:  https://www.youtube.com/@doomedtofailpod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@doomed.to.fail.pod Email: [e-mail] 

In a matter of the people of the state of California versus Hortthal James Simpson, case number B.A.019. And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you. Yes, I have to go to San Diego. I'm not exasperated about that. I have, I'm going to a baby shower. One of my best friends is having a baby. And I have to, while you're talking, I have to finish this baby blanket.

I'm so close to finishing it. But look, I have a whole thing up for you. it's like a cute little rainbow pattern and then I'm doing this edging on it and um anyway oh I have so much so little left to do oh my god I have like four inches left to do so I'm how long would that take you and then I'm ready I mean it's talking to me like months because it doesn't take you like you don't just do it you know in uh in like one sitting it's hard to tell but I've had people be like how much did you charge for those and I'm like I don't know a thousand dollars like it's it's like it takes so much time and then I saw these

things on Instagram I was like definitely targeted for these tags that you can buy to put on stuff that says like this took forever I'm never making you anything again it's really fun they're funny but try to get a baby blanket in whenever someone has a baby so that's what I'm working on so if you're having a baby and you need a baby blanket tell Taylor like right when you know I mean or just don't tell her and then just buy it just buy it separately just buy one at target but also it's special so I like to make them for people yep cool well we'll go ahead and take it off with the intro welcome to doom to fail the podcast we cover two stories one true crime one history around things that were doomed to fail not just relationships but also situations I'm far as joined by Taylor who's on her way to San Diego shortly there after this again the most jet-setting podcasters in America I know we saw each other so recently we saw each other yeah yeah it was a week ago then i was off to seattle then taylor went back to palm

springs and or joshua tree i confused too i flew to palm springs there you go there you um taylor who's up first today i think it's you i'm up first today okay yeah then let's cover your drink for the day okay farce have you up been to chicago Yes, unfortunately. And have you ever been to a portillo's? I don't know what that is. So it's like a delicious Chicago restaurant where they have like Chicago hot dogs, you know, which is like no ketchup, a pickle, the past, the poppy seed bun.

They look super good. And then it has like these really great french fries and it has like Italian beefs, which is like what you always have in Chicago. Last time I was out of portillo's, we got out and I went into the car. Stung by a B in the car. Do you remember that? It was like last year at my cousin's wedding at Lindsay's wedding. Is a port-

Are you saying a portillo or portillo as in like a proper noun? It's a proper noun, portillo's. So it's a restaurant called Portillo's. Mr. Portillo. Yes. Got it. Okay. Okay.

Anyway, Portillo's has a thing that is 850 calories for a small one, but it's a cake shake. I was just talking about this at work with people but it's a piece of chocolate cake heavy cream and ice cream and it's a cake shake and it is delicious. That's what you're going to have?

That's what I'm drinking. Hypothetically. This looks amazing. Yes, we actually put a slice of chocolate cake into our blended milkshake. Wow. That's awesome.

I mean, like, of course it's not good for you, but it looks great. This is not an everyday treat. This is a once an electric treat. Yeah. God, do you remember of that stuff that they made us read that we've read about?

Oh, gosh, what was that thing where you're like replacing something with another thing for like product theory? What? It was like a kale or a milkshake was the thing. What's that called? Do you remember that? Book we had to read. We read and we were the product team together.

for no reason for like a year oh i never did any of that stuff i didn't watch the movie they made us told us to watch remember that the the community i didn't do any of that no no i didn't either but um i was on maternity nearly during that kale or milkshake god even their their hot dogs is it called so good they're delicious delicious oh my whole point of this is um there there is this like whole story about how people were drinking shakes from mcdon for breakfast because they need something to like drink and that's what they invented like frapicinos anyway keep going um well we'll get to the bottom of this so my oh where's my notes i don't even know where notes are so okay i'll go into my section now that we know

what portillo's is um because at first i thought you were saying a portillo and i was like is that like the is that like a word that's like kind of like a bodega is in new york that's what's confused so okay anyways that's fair um miles is currently very confused about Harry Potter houses because I'm into Harry Potter party and he's like, what's Hufflepuff? I'm like, well, anyway. I saw that picture. That was a really cute picture. It's really cute. Jobs to be done is the product thing. Okay. Jobs to be done. No, no, no. I know jobs to be done. I didn't know. Yeah. Now I get it. I get where you're going from. Okay. So my drink is going to be a glass of Kianti, even though it's 10 o'clock in the morning here in Texas. Why would you think I'm going to drink? I'm so excited. Why would you think I'm going to drink glass of Kianti?

Why that specific dream? Because you know me. I don't know anything about wine. Well, I would say they're talking about Hannibal Lecter because that's why I think about immediately when I think about Kianti. Do you remember that part? Yeah. He eats the liver with Fava beans and a glass of Kianti.

I even wrote that down. Yes, that is exactly why I'm talking about Kianti or having am i right yes you're absolutely right so here's what i wrote i wrote because i'm covering people that are not dissimilar to the best movie villain of all time and i'm a lector and i referred to i'm gonna eat his liver with some fava beans and a nice canty so you named you've totally nailed it awesome um okay so i'm covering two crimes because they're short they're really short i don't know why they're so short because they're so fascinating and it's like you'd have to pull like international criminal records on one of them to actually know what all the details were and

i'm just not going to do that um but so it's i'm going to say that this is more like a phenomenon than like an individual true crime story and the phenomenon i'll hone in on is called consensual homicide i'm sure you get you grasp that concept is right sure like you're like you're like you can kill me it's cool yes yeah basically that basically that and like there's actually a humane way of this happening which is like the dr corvorkian version of that if you recall him from the 1990s where he would do it like that was such a big deal it's like it's like now like it's legal in oregon like you can just go somewhere you can go to sweden and do it like it's i forgot how worked up we were about that i still don't know how i feel about it

because I think that if like if I think that if you're like terminal right like you know obviously we've been someone that's been in that position and if if you're like this is just drag it on and it's too painful and I don't want this anymore then then yeah sure but like if you just have like suicidal ideations or like have depression I don't know I don't think that you should be allowed to just like kill yourself because I mean that shit can pass you know well I mean I think it's better to do it under medical care than to do it like at your house well I know but I'm saying I'd rather just not be on the table at all well of course we'd rather not do it but um yeah I don't know I haven't thought about it in a long time so

I'm not prepared to say how I feel about it no there you yep so there was a Dr. Kvorkian version of consensual homicide and then there's obviously the horrific disgusting gross version of it, which is what I'm going to cover today in two stories. So what is going to be like something people have already heard before? I'm positive. If this is the first thing you're hearing this story, I'll be shocked. The other one, I doubt you've heard it. So I'm going obscure and totally common.

So the first one is the story of Armand Muse, which you know, Taylor. Come on. Is it a German guy? Yes. I'm only laughing because Did you ever watch the IT crowd? I never watched that. Oh my God, it's so good.

It's on, I think it's on Netflix. It's two seasons or three, whatever there. It's fantastic. But there's one called Moss and the German, like one of the guys, his name was Moss. And he decides to like get, they tell him to go out and get more social. So he goes to take a German cooking class,

but it's like not a German cooking class. And they're like, why would you think anyone would ever go to a German cooking class? It's like really funny. That's a really good promise, actually. It's very funny. You remind me, Taylor, the girl I'm dating now, she does, she does what you do, like, every day. You're like, have you ever seen so? So I'm like, the answer's always no.

If the question is if I ever see. I'm not adding you. I'm at our audience because they're going to be like, oh, I totally was thinking that too, Taylor. I'm on your, your age. It's rhetorical. for you. Fair. I know better than to be like, have you read this? We talked about that already, so I don't ask you that anymore. The jury's still if I can't even read. So good move on that front.

Okay. So getting back to our old friend, Armin, so Armin lived in Wistafield, Germany. And I looked up Wistafield, Germany, and it looks like the landscape from the sound of music. And I remember just like It was so pretty It was so pretty Look at this town here I'll slack it to you Because like spelling Wustafield is kind of like a nightmare

Well I do kind of speak a little bit of German So no big deal Oh okay yeah there you're I'm sure I'm strong Wait how do you spell it? It's W-U-S-T-E F-E-L-D

Got it I'm sure it's Beautiful. I mean, this part of Germany is so freaking pretty. I have been to the sound of music place. We went on the sound of music tour in Salzburg, Australia, but it's the same area. This is gorgeous. Isn't it? You know, it got me thinking of like, why is it that like, like, how could you be a psychopath and live there? Because it's so, I mean, I guess it's a medical condition. I mean, also all the Germany became psychopaths in some way should reform. So I guess it all kind of, they don't have a great truck record. But what I do. But what I do. I mean, I guess it's just, I mean, did look up was the was where in the u.s has the highest per capita rate of serial killers to population ratio wisconsin no guess again uh colorado alaska arguably the old house already but like arguably it's like the prettiest state in the union right like it's like it's like alaska pacific northwest and then you have like the northeast there Like, you know, I mean, I'm being subjective about it, but like, it's weird.

It's like the prettiest places have these crazy people. Mm-hmm. So anyways, that's where Ormond is from. He, he had kind of like a weirder kink than most people have, which was he really wanted to consume. Oh, I should have mentioned. He's a software engineer because of course he is. No offense, software engineers. We all know you're a little bit antisocial and weird.

It's the way you are. God made you that way. squarely into software engineer territory you don't need to be social all good we understand so anyway okay i have i have thoughts on that i'll talk about later but um what year is this this would have been 2001 okay continue so arming's kink was he really wanted to like basically consume another human being like this was his fetish like that was you know that's what got him got his engine going And he wasn't, but he wasn't like, he wasn't like some sort of like a rabid document. Like he wasn't like a Ted Bundy type.

He wanted somebody to volunteer to do this, have this done to them. So there's a distinction between him and like a crazy serial killer and that he was like trying to do this in the most humane way, quote unquote, possible. So he goes to this now defunct website called the Cannibal Cafe, which I looked it up. And all you can find is like still shots at the page. and it is so gross looking it is like it is all like flesh-colored like back browns it's so gross it's disgusting is it like is it like for cannibals or is it like pretending yeah yes well it's the internet right so it's going to be both it's going to be some pretending some legit and apparently this guy was legit and he went on this forum and he posts a website or posts a request looking for

willing victims to be cannibalized. And what he asked for was a well-built 18 to 25-year-old man willing to be basically slaughtered and eaten. So he had a very, very defined narrow seven-year window that he was shooting for. And this post was kind of popular. And given the self-selected nature of who's attending and reading the Camel Cafe, that kind of makes sense. Armin ended up getting a ton of interest in this. But realistically, they all, everyone but one guy was like, oh, I was like I thought we were having fun and now this is turning into like a location meet up and I don't want that so yeah no that guy's not kidding yeah it was it was like oh we're all gonna have a good time right it's all gonna be fun and all of a sudden one guy like just starts like putting on like you know the the dexter uniform and you're like he's being serious this guy covering you with seasoning it was like there was that last podcast joke with like Jeffrey Dahmer like a cooking show where he like taste what do you say what do you say Henry was like he goes he like sucks on your pinky and then tries a glass of wine to see what pairs best. So there's one guy named Bird Yurkin, Armando Brandeis, which I'm going to refer to as Armando. It's easiest way to refer to him. He was a he was also an engineer in 43 years old. So he was definitely not within the category of 18 to 25, but he was interested in what Armin was putting out there.

So he replied to the post in March of 2001, and less than a week later, he shows up at his house. And so this is March 9th. The two basically come to an agreement on what is it that they're doing. This is the most dramatic thing ever. It's like grotesque, horrific, nightmareish, but it's also on the up and up, right? Like, it's like, it just encouraged me that this is kind of like Auschwitz, right? Like, it is, it's like there's paperwork for like, yes, we're going to kill this person it is we're sure i mean a smidge more consensual than ouchoes but yes a smidge more i don't know is it is this guy yes no one wants being outschwitz i know but yeah i know but can it even be this guy had to be insane right like it can't be consensual if it's if the person's

insane right it's way more consensual to answer an ad about being eaten than it is to be put on a train with Taoishwitz okay we can't agree to that we can agree to that okay great there's layers to it but yes i'll look i'll concede that much to you so all right thank you we're on march ninth again i'm not getting canceled for this episode for us we can't get canceled we can't get canceled so part of the terms that they agreed to on march ninth is that everything had to be recorded so that it was clear to anybody who learned later on that armando was doing this willingly so after all the consent protocols were taken this is all recorded by the way so there's a camcorder running the entire time because

everything had to be like on the up and up so so like during this time period armando takes 20 sleeping pills and he drinks a bottle of nightwell and then they kind of get started the first thing that they agreed to do was they agreed that armin would cut off armando's penis and they could eat it together I mean yeah he's not he's not doing great probably okay see that that's my point like before you cancel me at least get to this part of the podcast before you say this guy was mentally well enough to consent to something like this so they tried to eat it raw they couldn't it was way too chewy so armin did the rational thing and sauteed it with some garlic and salt pepper and wine it actually sounds like a pretty

good way to prepare it i think right if you put garlic on anything it's it will taste better see it it didn't work out because like kind of overdid it and he had to feed it to the dogs and they couldn't eat it themselves oh no you only get one chance of that you only yeah but like what i was thinking was like he fucked up because what he really should have done was he should have probably like cut it up a little bit and then made like a broth out of it yeah yeah he should just like there's no meat in there like sauteed it well because there's no meat like yeah he's not mean right we're going to we're going to in two in the weeds here so anyways by this point armando was not doing well and he was kind of in and out of consciousness armand drew a bath

and sat in the bath and he started reading a star trek book of all things because again these are engineers we're talking about and he would get up every 15 and 20 minutes and go check on armando in the bathroom eventually it was obvious that armando was like just bleeding out like he was just going to die anyways so um and he also also took 20 sleeping pills so armand just stabs him in the neck and then he hangs him his body on meat hooks what's interesting taylor is that again all this was recorded but the recording is private like cops don't release the recording because it's way too disgusting but But there were three or four screen grabs that were actually captured and published online.

And I found them. And think of the worst scene in Terrifier, part one, and it was basically that. Not basically. It was actually legitimately within matter of fact that, yeah. So when I say he was, Meat Hooks is not a right way to articulate it. His legs were hung separately from chains from the roof and like partitioned like he was like split in half like terrifier did to that girl yeah you remember this scene yeah okay I think so so that's what he did and then and there's a few

whatever if you want to look it up looking up but it's pretty gross so over the next 10 months armand ate Armando's body having dismembered and stored it in his freezer apparently it was somewhere around 44 pounds of meat that he ended up consuming over this time I was thinking about this I was like it would be kind of fun thinking like I'm the only person who can decide I'm going to try to a suvi version today versus like I'm going to smoke it today you know like he he had the option to be really creative with it and also I couldn't yeah that's that's the problem with like no good oh I was going to say that's the problem with like eating someone on like a boat because you're trapped at sea you don't get to cook it that is the problem that is the biggest problem I agree with you yeah I caught my video because I realized that we're going to have like it's going to be laggy, but one. Yeah. I did too. Yeah.

So shoot, I had a thought here. He said I can't remember where I was going with that. Oh, yeah. Oh, but you guys cook it basically. Yeah. No. So one thing that I found interesting was like there's very, very little details about Armando. Like very little details.

Like this guy, apparently like nobody liked him or like he had no family because like nobody went looking for this guy was really weird like it was just like he disappeared oh that's true that's a good question they just saw it up in some guy's basement and sword in his freezer and like nobody gave a shit nobody decided to look him up but again like think about like the guy's been like wanting to get eaten by somebody like he's probably not going to have a good normal friend group to rely on so we're gonna fast forward to december of 2002 so we are at eight months no that's right it's 20 months after the initial murder so 20 months later armin goes back on the cannibal cafe website and posts that he's looking for someone to tell a need in this advertisement he

basically eludes the fact that he's done it before so like trust me this is going to be this be great you're going to love it totally i learned from my mistakes yeah exactly and this one actually creeped enough people out to have them go to the authorities and report this post It seemed like weirdly detailed, basically. I couldn't find the actual post, but like the first one didn't drew any attention. So the idea was that this one had all the details that would make you freaked out. Police ended up going over to Armin's house to finding Armando and the videotape recording his murder and disfemberment. Armin was diagnosed with schizophrenia personality disorder, but he was deemed well enough to stand trial.

So on January 30th, 2004, he was initially convicted of manslaughter and sentenced to eight. eight and a half years of prison time because it's kind of manslaughter like the guy was recorded saying yep I'll do it I want to do it I'm lucid I'm not tied up I'm not you know so you're still not allowed to do that I guess like yeah you're you probably shouldn't be a lot to do that and I guess you're not allowed to do that so the courts realize this is well later on because the prosecution appealed this conviction and the sentence and we're like this is crazy this guy we have video of him sawing someone in half like this is yeah he should not be getting out in less than a decade and so

an appellate court decided that this is true this is accurate that maybe this was a um basically it all turned on whether it was consensual and that was the result was that you can't consent to something like that because like my earlier point you're probably not mentally well if you're consenting to it so like you shouldn't be allowed to essentially And so it was overturned. He was convicted this time of murder, not manslaughter, and he was sentenced to life imprisonment. It was interesting, Germany's so chill about stuff.

Like, he gets like furloughs. He gets to, like, go out on the town. He gets to wear this guy's. But he gets to, like, go out on the town during the days and, like, hang out. It's so weird. I love that he'd like have a mustache on and be like, hello, you smell this today.

I know. Oh, God. Yeah, it's like that your pretty face is going to hell episode with a cannibal where he like has like someone's arm just like in his back pocket and he's just walking around with the bleeding everywhere but um but that's that's the first story that's the first story is arm amuse and his whole tale there this one the next one wait do you have any thoughts on that Taylor no I mean I I'm torn on the consent thing because I'm like

I don't know he he wanted to do it but also like what what's the alternative to like who was going to find um the our mom help him no one He didn't have any family. Nobody cared. How did they find him? They found him because Armin posted again about getting a new victim. Oh, because he posted again. Got it, got, got, got, got it.

But no one ever said, like, I missed this guy. No, I mean, complete strangers were like, yeah, let's go find this guy. Yeah. Not great. Not great for Aramon. No, not great. For Armanda. So the next story happened in 1996.

It is a story of Sharon Lopatka. Have you heard of this one? I don't know. I don't think so. Okay. This one, it's actually really similar. So I'll just do, I'll do like go to the highlights because, again, it comes back to like the conceptual part of this. So Sharon was born in Baltimore, Maryland in 1961. So by the time that this ends up happening, she's 35 years old.

Which is like, as far as I understand, kind of like an inflection point with some women who have kids and stuff, like things are either going greater or not. And she was married. She had several kids. She started her own business. She was like a serial entrepreneur. She'd start businesses. They would do well. They would flourish.

Then they would go broke. And then she would go under. She started a type of business, which was kind of like the V1 of only fans in like 1995-ish. And this was also forum-driven. So this was website. I'm not going to name because it just I don't want my my parents in the other room and I want them to hear me say these words but but they're they're like they're finished websites essentially and she would go post on these websites pictures of

herself nude or pictures of her like sell her used underwear and like is literally only fans from like 1995 and this is interesting because this case later on will be the very first time email evidence was used to at a trial at a criminal trial so that's how early we're talking about here so anyways yeah she starts doing this in 1995 again she's married she's kids at this point but she's like going through whatever she's going through it whatever it's happening in her life she ends up talking to a guy named robert frederick glass on in one of these forums and they start kind of developing an internet relationship no offense but robert was also an engineer a software engineer

um and it's just dude come on you know it's funny taylor i just saw that you sent me that picture of stonewall jackson and talk about how like he was like a sexy vampire look i was like thinking about that whatever um no i was um i read a book it says i'm sorry but to digress this called brotopia about like silicon valley and how like men are you know whatever they're doing there but But there's like a, one of the first software engineers, that was his personality. And so everybody else felt uncomfortable being around him. So then those people just like swarmed to it. There's nothing like about their like cognitive ability that makes like weird, you know,

anti-social dudes, engineers. It's just that they were the ones that felt comfortable in those classes because they all were weird. You know? Seriously. So it was, it was, it wasn't. So there was actually a lot more social higher. the hierarchy involved in the decision making, then you would assume, basically. Yes.

And it's not like, they're not like built for that. They just happen to everyone else is doing it. It looks just like them. How do you explain that the two stories I'm going to cover have to do with engineers eating people? Because they became engineers because they were weird. Got it. Not being engineers. It doesn't make you weird.

Got it. Okay. The latter I agree with. So, yes. We're on the same page. So, go back to Robert. Okay.

So he's an engineer. He's in North Carolina. And he is also on these internet forums. And just like super into like death and dying and eating people and fetishes and all that stuff. Him and Sharon start kind of developing this relationship. And they eventually decided they want to meet up in person. So in October of 1996, Sharon travels to North Carolina to meet Robert. She left a note with her husband, who's crazy as shit ever.

She left a note saying, I'm leaving. I don't want you to investigate what I've been up to. Like, legit. That's how she argued with it. Like, she was basically, I'm about to do something crazy. And I don't want you to look into what I'm about to do. Leave it alone. And her husband immediately reported to the police.

And so the police start digging into her communications on the internet with this guy, Robert. and they find six weeks of communications with each other that are basically articulating that they want to meet up so that he can kill her and eat her body basically that was the entire substance of the communications so and this is the crazy part too is like whenever they met up wherever she flew into they had Robert had to pick her up and drive her 80 miles what was that drive like how's it going like what do you do you do talk about what is what is the small talk like when you're like you see each other because like how good good the pictures have been anyways really you probably see each other for first time it's like really the first time you're getting a good look at each other and you have 80 miles to think about what you're about to do i don't know that's a lot that we're just fascinating me so they hung out they basically they had a sexual relationship together for a couple of days and then eventually they decided that robber was going to strangle sharing to death which you

he does he kills her and then he dismembers her body and buries her in his backyard it is kind of up in the air whether or not he ate part of her or not TBD we don't totally know that but he was arrested shortly thereafter because again the police the husband reported this immediately to the cops the cops were digging through her emails and found all these communications but back then there was no real constant of IP tracing there weren't like the constant of issuing same is to ESP so understand where the IPs originally all this is like brand name So this was not like, yes, the husband immediately reported, but it took a long time to get to the bottom of like, who is this guy? And so finally the police get to the bottom of it.

They find who it is. They go to his house. He's arrested. He's ultimately convicted. This is incredible. He's convicted again to eight and a half years for murdering, dismembering, probably eating and throwing the corpse of a one inch into his backyard. He's free right now. He was released in 2006 for this crime.

Well, I think it's fucked up if he didn't eat her. Isn't that what she, is that what she wanted or no? That is what she wanted. Yeah. So, hold on. So that's the part that's fucked up. Not the fact that he's out and running about right now. He killed someone in his trailer.

He spent 80 miles on a car with her several days hanging out and talking and getting to know each other and then he strangled. But isn't that better than just like picking someone off the street? doesn't look at it yeah yeah you see you keep pigeonholing me with these hypotheticals yes you're right it well i'm putting hypotheticals into it i'm just asking the important questions that's right you're at you think it's i don't think anyone's having the best time yeah i don't think anybody's having the best time either yeah it is interesting with sharing the gradual toll of like she was doing like normal entrepreneurial stuff like i'm the motivational speaker

and I'm this and then and then all of a sudden it's like do you want to buy my used underwear it's like it's like a weird like that's a story of the internet yeah eventually we will only be interested in buying each other's undergarments that is true yes exactly exactly selling feet picks that's it yeah so that was one of the ones i didn't say was like that was one of the sites that she was active on oh sure i'm sure yeah of course of course so yeah those my story consensual homicide there's actually a pretty long list of these one of the grosser ones was this guy in Japan who was he's now considered a serial killer but at the time it was consensual homicide where he told people he was going to

kill them using carbon monoxide poisoning so it would be like a painless death and then when they showed up at his place he'd like throw a bag over their face and like strangle them to death so it was yeah that takes away the consensual part okay yeah exactly exactly so I feel like our arm in like at least he like he wrote everything down he was weirdly German about it he was so German about it but then the American got out better yeah the American got out better than he did the American actually served only eight and a half years so who does it sounds like everyone

was just like grossed out and scared and afraid of the internet yeah they should have been it sounds like um I guess it's true I guess the doomed to feel part of the this is like if a software engineer tells you that he has a cannibalism fantasy, take him seriously. He's weird enough to do it. That's true. Definitely call the police. And don't. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Ever go to his apartment. No. No, no, no, no. Yes. Bring a bottle of luminal when you go to the apartment just in case. Wait, what's luminal? The thing that you spray and then it makes wherever blood used to be glow in a black light.

Why do you know that? It's like a very, very popular thing. Like, let me not popular, but like in the 90s, they did it all the time on like 2020. You know, they would like go to a room where someone had been murdered and you can't see any blood, but you spray luminal and then you turn on a black light. And it's like bloody handprints on the walls and like blood on the ceiling.

So you can like see what people have done. Okay. All right. Well, there you go. Lesson learned. So that's my story today, Taylor. Hopefully people learn something new about the internet in the early 90s. That's gross.

That's gross. But yeah, I'm sure people are still doing it right now. Yeah, yeah. What is it like tour? I'm sure if you got tour, you could probably go to some equivalent of the cannibal cafe and find someone to eat there. Yeah. Which would solve world hunger, actually. If we could just like start eating each other. That happens in like every single apocalyptic thing, but that sounds like that's where we're headed to anyway.

It would also probably be good for the environment. Right, because you wouldn't, well, then no, then people would be on farms to eat. That would happen quite quickly. Who do you think would end up on the farms to eat? Americans. Would they look more like me or more like you, you think? More like you do. Someone just told me they think that that I would taste really game.

me, like stringy and gaming. Well, I hope I never have to find it out. But if I am serving to death on a boat with you, I will eat you raw. Oh, God, well, there we go. But then I'll get to live on. That's how the story ends. This is the, you heard Taylor's confessions here.

Sweet. Well, that was my story. If I had a grill, I'd grill you. Yeah. You'd grow me. Awesome. Fars, super gross, per usual.

Super fun. Yeah, I have a little bit of listener, mail, Kiara, our friend, sent a suggestion. I think it's more for you, but did you ever see the or hear about Action Park or say a documentary about it? Yeah, yeah, I did. That I did see. That could be a fun one to talk about later because it's so crazy. Yeah.

Just like that. Yeah. Cool. And everyone, follow us at Doom to Fail Pod everywhere that you listen to podcast. Oh, also, so I was on TikTok, and there's just a new trend on TikTok about how men always think about the Roman Empire. So I'm trying to get into it by posting about a Roman Empire stories. I'll let you know more. Yeah, I saw that.

I saw you republished a bunch of our old ones. Yeah. Nice. Sweet. Well, we'll go ahead and cut this off. And again, if you have any feedback, please write to us at Doom to Failpot at Gmail.com. We're always looking for feedback, any suggestions, thoughts, whatever it is. It is always welcome.

So thank you. And we'll go ahead and cut this off and rejoin you on Wednesday. Cool. Thanks, Kars. Yep. Thanks, Taylor. Bye.