Doug Loves Movies - 12 Guests of Xmas III

Episode Date: December 18, 2012

The 3rd Annual 12 Guests Of Xmas ep features Scott Aukerman, Graham Elwood, Chris Hardwick, and 12 other surprise guests. Yes, Doug invited too many of his friends to 12 Guests Of Xmas. Enjoy all three hours of it...See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers screaming baby sticky seeds with 50 as in popcorn kernels in his teeth there's still not one that he won't see as dog loves movies merry titsmas and a fappy new year Hey everybody My name is Doug and I love movies This is Doug Loves Movies Third annual 12 Guests of Christmas app Coming to you from the UCB Theater In Los Angeles on December

18 I wrote down 20 for some reason it's the 18th but I caught it you guys problem solved to Ocean 12 thank you to Ricky Lindholm

Kate McHugh, Mike Furman and Chris Hardwick for that live rendition of the theme song. As you can see, there are lots of chairs on this stage tonight. More than 12 chairs, actually. Yeah, that's because more than

a dozen friends of mine said yes and then are actually showing up. So, it's a Christmas miracle. One of them's here because Hanukkah's over already. So, that's a Christmas miracle. So, what we're going to do is we're going to have just a huge... How do I get this microphone situation situated?

We're going to have a single elimination Leonard Walton game where all these 15 people will be competing and when they miss if they have to name a movie or if they successfully name and someone else challenges them, the loser in that scenario will get up and leave and say goodbye for the night.

Yeah. And according to the Mayans, possibly forever. So it's a very, very tense competition tonight. And we've got some great people coming out here. And then, you know, one or two that are... We'll see. But first, one plug. I'm taping Benson Interruption this Saturday, December 22nd

at Meltdown Comics at 420. So if you're in Los Angeles and you've finished your shopping or you could do your shopping at Meltdown Comics when you come to the show. You can buy everyone on your list a comic book or an action figure. That sounds nice. Douglovesmovies.com for

deets and links. Does anyone reindeer for the Leonard Maltin game? Here tonight. All right, since the shitheads are going to pile up this evening, I really appreciate it if you put your shithead on the back of your name tag. If you haven't already, figure out a way to do it. Maybe use your own blood or something. Jordan,

you tweeted at me saying, can the baseball come into play tonight? And I said yes. I didn't say yes. I said something stupid, but I implied yes. And so there it is. The baseball is back. So let's see. Let's see what

happens. 15 people. He's got to get picked. He's right there in the center holding a baseball. There's nothing more American than that. All right, so if you can write a shithead on your name tag, that would be cool. And tonight's winner is going to qualify for, if there's ever another tournament of championships

the winner tonight will qualify for that so let's bring out the guests I'm going to talk to each one find out what they brought to give away and let them pick a name tag maybe chat for a little bit more and then bring somebody else out

that's how it's going to work once we get all 15 guests out here, then we will play the Leonard Ball game. Let's bring the first person out. What do you say, guys? Let's do it. Let's have... You know him, you love him. It's my friend

Scott Aukerman. Hey! You know him, you love him. It's my friend Scott Aukerman. Hey. Where have you been? Hey. Whoever you would like to see. Douglas Spencer. With Doug Loves Movies. That should have been the first at the beginning.

That really got them riled up. That's nice. Thank you. How are you, buddy? I'm good. Silver bells. Ha ha. Anyway. It's very cold outside. Ha ha. Baby. It's very cold outside, baby. Are you excited about the changes

over at G4? Sure. Doug's referring to my hat, to my hat, to my hat. Please don't sing. We'll have to pay for it. One way or the other. What? Do you have something to give away

for the prize bag no you never told me how does the show usually work I don't know the show usually works where I'm here

on a Tuesday night and you go hey someone dropped out do you mind stepping in that's how it usually works. And what is your reply? Yes, please.

I want to be famous. It's working. It's all because of my podcast. Whatever Sam Levine has is for me, too. I saw a list today somewhere that you were the number one entertainment podcast. And this program was number three. Oh, and that doesn't seem right to you.

No, no, I'm just repeating the information. Good company, I think. That's what I say. We're all winners except for you're the best winner. As far as I'm concerned, you and I are hand-in-hand, you know, leading the pack of great comedy contests. What? Who am I?

It might have been a weird, like, people... The second place went to Jeff Dunham. You didn't really know. No. Whoa. I know the dude has albums, but a podcast would really be pushing it. What's Peanut going to say about the news this week?

I'm assuming that's what Peanut sounds like. Oh, Mr. Belvedere. Very close. Very close. Scott, would you please pick a name tag that you'd like to play for this evening? Yes, sir! Got a lot of great ones out there.

Fifteen of them will be chosen. Somebody with a big goofy face over there. The dog. Scott's going in for what looks like a box of cereal. This is a fellow named Tony.

Uh-huh. And what has he got there? Fruit Loops? What did he pick out? Some Lucky Charms for that? Is he like a Irish guy named Tony? This is Frosted Flakes, a box of Frosted Flakes. And he has over Frosted Flakes he has taped the word

Tony. Not necessarily a play on Frosted Flakes. Kellogg's Tony. Not necessarily a play on frosted flakes. Kellogg's Tony. Probably wouldn't sell as well under that. Makes me wonder if Kellogg's won a Tony. Upon further investigation, there's a tiger underneath this

by the name of Tony, because it says Tony on his neckerchief. So you look at things from top to bottom. Sure. That was the last thing you caught. Oh, yeah. I'm not Japanese. No. I just see a tiger.

Like, whoa! What's going on? Oh, Tony. It's cool. It's Tony. Anytime you're in a cereal aisle, you get concerned. There's a lot of scary characters on cereal. Boo Berry freaks me out.

Count Chocula? He's a shady character. Oh, Jesus. Scott Aukerman, everybody, is here. Thank you. That's how it's done. That's how we do it. You know what?

Move to a strategic seat, Scott. I what? Move to a strategic seat. Oh, I thought that we were going in alphabetical for the, in terms of order as well. Yeah, well, if you'd like. I just let people sit wherever they want. Oh, okay, sure. I'm going to give this away for the prizes as well.

Okay, so the box of cereal from Tony. I'm sure he didn't do anything to it. I'm sure it'll be fine. Hey, please welcome to the stage, Graham Elwood is here, everybody. Thank you. This mic doesn't work. My prize? Half-drunk raw smoothie from next door.

Keep it healthy. That's your prize? Half-drunk raw smoothie from next door. Keep it healthy. That's your prize? Yeah, that's my prize. All right, our next guest. You don't even get interview time if that's your idea of a prize. Do you want to drink a little bit more of it, or are you good?

I'm good. All right, so put it in the bag. Put it in the bag. Actually, I brought a copy of the Comedy Film Nerds Guide to Movies. He was kidding about the bad being the... I wasn't serious. Just joking around.

That goes in there. All right. Very nice. Put it in your bag. I'm UCB's reckoning. You will all endure. Theatricality and deception are good tools for the uninitiated.

I know, mine sounds more like Sean Connery. Mine is such a shot. Oh, you're Miss Moneypenny. You're Gotham's reckoning. Do you got anything to plug? Yes, I'll be doing... Besides the book. I'll be doing the Bane one-man show.

No, just, yeah, the Comedy Film Nerd Guide to Movies. Go to Comedy Film Nerds and listen to my podcast. And soon we'll be announcing next year's L.A. Podcast Festival date. Oh, shit. Is it next week?

Yeah, it's next week. Every four months, we're just gonna fucking bang it out. Let's do it. Pick a name tag, please, Graham, that you're going to play for tonight. Name tags. Nice. Nice. That's just a thing. Batman Wine?

Oh, alright. Did you ever see Die Hard, Graham? There's a nice Die Hard. No, never saw Die Hard. Who's just a thing. Batman Wine? Oh, all right. Did you ever see Die Hard, Graham? There's a nice Die Hard. No, I never saw Die Hard. Who's in that? Reference right there. Rodman? Look at that.

It's got Alan Rickman is in it. Everyone sounds like Bane in every movie. Mr. Potter. How do you reckon, Mr. Potter? When Alexander saw the breadth of his own brain... Just pick a goddamn name tag. Say, do the Bane one-man show right now. Oh, I was right now.

I was born in a cave. I'll do Grace's crazy hand right here. Give me your fucking hand. Human hand. This is real. This is a real hand. We cut it off earlier. What's the name on the hand? Grace. Give me your fucking hand. Human hand. This is real. This is a real hand. We cut it off earlier. What's the name on the hand?

Grace. All right. Okay. For those of you listening to the podcast, nothing happened right there. Nothing happened. Not a single thing. You think

the listeners thought they were missing something that got pure silence? They're like, wow, something fascinating must be happening on stage. Nope. Maybe they were meditating. Maybe that's what was going on. Everyone was going inside themselves. Also in the prize bag is a Doug Loves Movies t-shirt and also this. I've been giving them out for weeks. Someone named

Tweedle Clare C-L-A-R-E. Tweedle spelled exactly how you'd imagine it. Tweedle Clare on Twitter made these Douglas Movies buttons which is very nice for her to give me a bunch of them. So maybe if you write to her on Twitter she'll send you one or

something will happen. Scott, do you want to give the update? What the fuck is happening right now? What's happening is we're about to see Chris Hardwick! Yeah! In the hot seat. This is like your pre-interview for the position of contestant. I work hard

and I'll answer things in a mostly non-correct fashion. Speaking of Harry Potter riffs... Sounds like a Hufflepuff talk to me. Doug, how are you? I'm good, how are you? I'm good, but I was in a car accident on the way over here Yeah! Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry

What are you doing? I'm sorry Talk to the hand I didn't do I don't know, it wasn't my fault I was coming up I was coming across Willoughby, just past Highland,

and then a guy in a Prius decided to pull over and park. And then for seemingly no reason, as if a cat were driving, he just decided, I want to be going in the opposite direction. So he tried to make a U-turn out of the right parking lane.

Sure. And then I slammed my brakes and the woman behind me was not so lucky. Oh. She hit me. So you just have a little dent in the back and you have to...

Is that a special scarf you have to wear? Yep. No, this is keeping my head on. I was horribly injured. If I pull this off then it just falls off. Like Nearly Headless Nick, another Harry Potter reference. That deserved so fucking much more.

I mean, like, so much more. Especially the guy in the Steve Zizou hat. Steve Zizou? Steve Zizou. Steve Zizou. I really appreciated your Bane impression from backstage. Oh, Graham. Another Bane.

We will have dueling banes. People of Gotham, please welcome our next guest. Oh, first, Chris, you have to pick a name tag from the crowd. Oh, wow. I'm glad you survived your accident. Oh, my gosh.

There's so much of it. There's Wonka. Apparently, that's the gentleman's name. But I think... Or is the top hat of it? Oh, his name's Charlie. I'm sorry. You know, I think I got to go puppet back here.

Oh, yeah. There's a puppet. You're going to just put your hand right up in there, huh? Well, Batman. Oh, no. It's a Bane puppet? It's a Bane puppet. It's a Bane puppet.

Put his hands on his lapels and just make pronouncements. People of puppet land! It's not easy being green. Why are there so many songs about rainbows? And what's on the other side? What? many songs about rainbows.

And what's on the other side? What do you got to plug, Chris? Because, you know, later in the show you might be one of the first ones eliminated. We might not have to watch that puppet blow you. Yeah. At least that wasn't

the first thing you did with it. You took it dancing first. Yep, that's right. Because I'm romantic. Om nom nom nom nom nom nom. Om nom nom nom nom nom. Nom noms. Chris Harden plays.

I'm so sorry. Oh, I was going to plug Nerdist Podcast and Talking Dead Alright thank you Second season doesn't start Or back half of the season doesn't start soon enough Does he have a prize? Doesn't start soon enough Oh yeah what'd you bring?

I was so rattled from the corrects And I didn't have anything $40 $40 Which would be about the retail value of anything I would have brought in. Throw it in loose change. All right.

There you go. There you go. Thank you very much, young man. Have a hot meal. Have a terrific holiday season. Have a hot meal. Hey, you guys. Back for a second year in a row.

I don't know why she puts up with it My friend Brie Larson is here Look at her peeking out in a dress Hello Am I sitting in the right chair? You can sit wherever you want That's a good spot for the pre-interview

What's that? I want to know which is the best chair to sit in That's a good spot for the pre-interview. What's that? I want to know which is the best chair to sit in. That's fine right there. I mean to win. That's going to be hard to figure out. I wouldn't sit right next to Scott Aukerman if you want to win. I'm going out early.

Oh, is that your plan? He's got a dinner reservation next door. I have become worse and worse at this game as the years go by. I predict an early exit. Honestly, if not first round. Sorry, Tony. Yeah. You're not great. Doug, I don't get it.

What did you bring for me to give to the lucky winner? I drew this. I thought that it was organic chemistry in the background with a fly. I was informed backstage that it's a psychedelic penis. Oh, okay. Which one? Garfunkel or Oates

told you that? Neither. Garfunkel! told you that? Neither. All right, Chris, now, is that puppet really going to be a thing the whole time? We didn't invite T.J. Miller

for a reason. Take control. Take control of your puppet, Chris. You're not taking control. Take control of your puppet, Chris. You're not taking control. Brie, you are awesome in Jump Street, I just want to say. You got something else that's coming out someday soon?

22 Jump Street? Something cooking? 21 Jump Street 2. I guess is what they will call it. I'm not sure. You're going to be in it? I'm not sure. Oh, really? We'll see. I have two films at Sundance, so I'll be going there.

One that Joseph Gordon-Levitt has directed, so we'll see what happens. Oh, yeah. We will see. That's it. It's not very funny. The movie's not funny, or you're just talking about it? Talking about it. I mean, it's just not a funny film, I don't think.

Oh, okay. What's it about? It's about Jersey Shore, but like, serious. Like the real people. Fair enough. Brie Larson, everybody. Good luck in tonight's game. We've got the eye of the tiger. Yeah.

Oh, you have to pick a name tag. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah. I've been thinking about it the whole time. Almost skipped that part. Ooh, ooh, ooh. Oh, what's that flashing one? I love shiny things.

Is that a Grinch? It is. Oh, is that your phone lighting it up? Fantastic. Yeah, that guy really is. He's got a whole presentation. Yes, you Grinch. Yeah, can you...

Traditionally, the star goes to them. Oh, oh, wait. The star. Oh, Scott, you're the best and the worst. So who are you playing for? The Grinch? Trevor Lou Who. Oh, okay. That's cute.

And he lit it up with his phone. You didn't get the phone, though. I know. I thought he had a more spectacular lighting device, but an iPhone will work. No, he's just handy with a phone. You know who else is handy with a phone. Citizens of Gotham.

Sam the Ma'am Levine, a.k.a. Lil' Wolverine. Are you out of microphones already? What'd you bring for the bag, buddy? Oh, I brought some great stuff. We've got hardcore, raw, and uncut from the makers of the multi-platinum smash hit Ghetto Fights.

Why did you sign it? Because I want them to be even more worthless. You don't get in a ghetto fight for nothing. There's got to be some sort of payoff. No, but if you read the inscription there, it says While the Street Brawls, and then he wrote in

this was directed by Orson Welles. That's right. Little known fact. Towards the end of his career. He directed some street brawls. DVDs. Thank you for that, Sam. Oh, my pleasure, Doug. When is the debut date of Do No Harm, your new television

series where you play a doctor with Jekyll and Hyde tendencies? Nope, you're thinking of our lead, Stephen Pasquale. I play his assistant. I'll think of it however I want to think of it. Very well. I'll watch it my way, Steven Pasquale. I play his assistant. And that premieres... I'll think of it however I want to think of it. Very well. I'll watch it my way.

You watch it yours. Fair enough. January 31st, 10 p.m. That's a Thursday night, 10 o'clock. Check it out. Boom. Boom.

Don't miss it. Sounds great slash weird. It's great. Right? That's a good review without having seen it? Yeah. It's great weird? No, it's just great.

Oh, okay. And it's edgy. It is. It's edgy. You'd be like, this is NBC? I thought this was cable. This is so good. You heard it here first, Chris.

I've heard it other places. it here first, Chris. I've heard it other places. Sam, could you do us an honor of picking a name tag of someone who is going to win all the prizes tonight? First, I did not win this last year. The great Graham Elwood did. Did anyone bring a Sam-related sign? Yes.

Oh. Then you get... What is it? What's your sign? This is 40. Wait, this is 40? I'm not in that movie. Well, it's related to you. What does this is 40 have What's your sign? Or this is 40? Wait, this is 40? I'm not in that movie. Well, it's related to you. What does this is 40 have to do with him?

Well, you know people who were in that. Other than being an accurate number. I'm not in this movie. I'm not 40! I'm barely 13! I'm 13! Who duped you? What's the name of the duper?

Her name is Carrie. Okay, Carrie. Good job. You duped me? What's the name of the duper? Her name is Carrie. Okay, Carrie. Good job. You duped me, Carrie. I think you have a shot at this. You just taped a name over the book title and then bullshitted Sam into thinking it had something to do with him. That was brilliant. That's fucking awesome.

You must be a publicist or something. I bet you she also didn't pay to get in. I did. Oh, everybody did tonight. That was my joke about how it's always free. The one night everybody pays, I fuck it up. Ladies and gentlemen,

please give a big warm welcome. You already heard her voice and saw her face earlier this evening. Ricky Lindholm is here. Sit wherever you want. Hi, guys. Hello. What'd you bring for the prize bag?

I brought a bunch of Garfunkel Notes merch, some t-shirts. Yeah, a bunch of signed stuff. And then I also brought animal butt magnets and Axe hair gel. Are they magnets of animal butts or do they stick to animal butts?

They stick to your fridge, but there's a little rooster butt on there. Oh, yeah, if you're a cow who likes anal. If you're super classy. If you're a cow magnet. Yeah. That's a great, that's an additional bag to my bag, if you don't mind If you're super classy. If you're a cow magnet. Yeah. So, yeah. That's a great, that's an additional bag to my bag. If you don't mind passing it down here, we'll put it over here with all the other.

Thank you, Scott. All the other junks. Thank you, Scott and Bree. And, wow, someone's going to win a lot of stuff. Yeah. And when can we, your movie? Hell Baby? Yes.

Sundance. I've heard a rumor that you are very interested in seeing that. I've seen it already. Oh, you have? Yeah, yeah. Oh, okay. Sundance, yes, January. Sundance in January.

Yeah. Yeah. And is there a chance that part of that scene is going to get cut or anything? I don't think so. I think that scene was well received. So I think I've heard I don't know how

you could be against it. Yeah. There's really nothing to complain about. How long do you think that scene is? It's long. Yeah, yeah.

I couldn't do it. It was weird for me It's like five minutes of straight vagina. I'm sorry, what's this film? Yeah. See, everybody

got uncomfortable. I'm not allowed to say that word again. It's called Steel Magnolias. It's like around the time you get tired of seeing your vagina, they cut to your ass. Right, right, right. It's really well done.

I'm your vagina's recommender. My mom is going to be so proud. Yeah. The thing I love about this impression is the timeliness. I pity the fool who doesn't like a Timely Bane reference. There's someone listening at home that loved it. One.

Singular. One person. Is that weird? What? Your vagina? Is it weird that people are going to know what its topography is all about? I don't know. We'll see how my dating life goes after that. I think there's going to know what its topography is all about? I don't know. We'll see how my dating life goes after that.

I think there's going to be a before and after. You'll definitely get emails from people. Yeah. I think my dating pool is going to go down about 90%, but I'm okay with that. I don't know if I... Because they're real people. I don't know if I could watch. I'd feel weird knowing something about you.

I feel like... Really? Yeah. I could totally see your penis and not care. Really? Yeah. Whip it up! Let me see it! Why do people keep saying that to me?

I don't know. I feel like I could look at your penis in a scene and then look you in the eye and not think about it. That's what I think. Should I stop saying this when I take it out for people? Oh, you're gonna care. I shouldn't say that, right? That automatically puts me in a bad...

Unless there's something really, really weird going on, I think I'll be fine. And vice versa. Well, it has a mask on it. It's a funny movie and a funny scene, so, you know, it's not... It's a funny movie and a funny scene, so... Yeah. It's not... It's not what? It's not like a boner factory.

But it's, you know, it's good. It's more of a boner mom and pop shop. Yeah, and it's really unfair that there are going to be tax... Can you pick a name tag, Ricky? Yes. If anyone has a... Yeah, this is awesome. I saw this from the side. That was very efficient.

What is it? Yippee-ki-yay, Melon Farmer. It's a cute picture of Doug. Look at this. I always pick things with your face on it because I like the effort. Was Melon Farmer how they dubbed it in? Yeah, right.

I like the effort, too. But nothingmer how they dubbed it in? Yeah, right. I like the effort, too. But nothing's better than the end of Die Hard 2. Yippee-ki-yay, Mr. Falcon. There is no Mr. Falcon at all in that movie. At all. Wait, what's your name? Guru Shabit? Guru Shabit.

What is it? Guru Shabit. Guru Shabit. Okay, that's not a real name. I'll be honest. Every time it comes around to you, I'll just say... Gershabed. Lady G.

Yeah. And Gershabed. Gershabed. Gershabed. There's no way. Yeah, if Bane could remind me, that'd be great. Take control. Take control of your weird name.

Take control. Take control of your weird name. The next guest, he skipped out last year because of Hanukkah. Boo! Oh, I'm sorry. I don't know what that was about. The prior year, he performed under duress. He was stricken with a cold or flu.

And so who knows what we're going to get tonight is what i'm trying to say ladies gentlemen josh melina is here hello sir just sit anywhere near where i can get a microphone to you and chat with you for a second about howdy welcome thank you for for coming out thanks for having me Doug what's the difference between revenge and scandal you're on one of them .5 in the key demo nice I get them confused but you're on the one with the black lady as the main character

that's right it's a Shonda Rhimes joint oh okay so that's probably why I haven't gravitated towards it one with the black lady as the main character. That's right. It's a Shonda Rhimes joint. Oh, okay. Alright, so that's probably why I haven't gravitated towards it, per se. Give it a shot. I will give it a shot. I read your tweets about it and it sounds fascinating. Incessant.

Self-promotion. Thursday nights at 10. Alright. I think Chris thinks that the puppet looks like you or something it does look a little bit like me I look like most puppets hang on what time did you say your program airs?

oh are we going to compete? oh son of a bitch it's on cage match you're going to want to watch Scandal you're going to want to DVR Scandal and watch Do No Harm until we get our second season. Then you can watch Scandal again live.

There you go. Everybody wins. Guys, no one's going to watch either. Aww. Because they'll be busy watching Ricky's vagina. Oh, you're going to mow that? Also Thursdays at 10.

Yeah, yeah. It's got a really good slot. What? What? That's TV terminology. You people are weird. I'm sorry. Okay, we've only got about 20 minutes left.

Here we go. So let's... Oh, you guys missed out on Scott doing some really good miming Josh would you please pick a name tag That you would like to play for in tonight's competition I know I want a Jew So please lower your signs If you're not Jewish put it down I don't see a lot of signs please lower your signs. If you're not Jewish, put it down. Jewish woman. I don't see a lot of signs being lowered.

No. It's a very Jewish crowd. You! All right. All right, bring it down here, Rothschild. Whatever that means. All right, he's going to get a bunch of chocolate. Allie?

And then the name is Allie? Allie. Okay. All right. So you're playing for Allie? Allie. Okay. All right. So you're playing for Allie, and there's... Oh, and Bree's going to tear into that chocolate right now. Nicely done. And what'd you bring for the prize bag? I don't have a lot of product,

so I brought two pictures of myself. One signed by the cast of The West Wing. That's awesome. One signed by the cast of The West Wing. That's awesome. One signed by the cast of Scandal. Or rather... Or rather signed by me as if I were... I did all the signing. But I also added Lady Gaga to the cast of West Wing.

And Burt Lancaster to the cast of Scandal. Thereby making them more collectible. That's perfect. Thank you so much. Would you like to save the envelope? Not necessary. Okay, we'll put them back in the envelope. Yeah, it's nice. Josh, did you ever figure out how to spell ukulele?

Anyone else? No? Really? Too obscure. All right. In the line of fire. Thursday night. TNT. Okay. I appreciate fire. Thursday night. TNT. Okay. I appreciate it. My pleasure. That other beautiful voice you heard at the top of the show

is a young lady named Kate McCucci, everybody. Hi. How are you? Is this where I'm supposed to sit? Hi, Kate. Pass me whatever you brought to give away. Okay, so Seth MacFarlane, Music is Better Than Words CD. And Family Guy DVD Volume 10, but I only have the first two DVDs. The third one is missing. Sorry. So in case you're wondering how it ends.

What a terrific prize. Yeah. Wet their appetite with this much of it and then have to figure out a way to see the rest of it. Right. Hopefully it's still available somewhere. Somehow. But thank you so much for that. No problem. What do you want to?

What's going on? Because I forgot. Ricky brings much for that. No problem. What are you up to? What's going on? Thanks to Ricky for bringing them because I forgot. Ricky brings enough for everybody. Everybody's gifts are just shit that Ricky brought and it's working out great. What are you up to? What's going on? Well, today I was in Van Nuys.

And what else? Yesterday I defrosted my freezer. And it was kind of appropriate because I was listening to Christmas music and it was like Winter Wonderland and Frost of the Snowman. Like all these really snowy kind of things and I was like covered in ice. Yeah. I love that story.

It's so Christmassy thank you why were you covered in ice? I was hacking away at this freezer cause it's like one of those like you know the freezers

you have when you're in college and you don't like they just like collect ice why do you have one of those freezers? you are totally an adult now

I know I know I lived in a little cabin and I didn't have a real kitchen, and so I had the tiniest little freezer, and I never opened the door. And as I opened it, I was like, oh, my gosh, it's just one giant ice cube. So I took a hammer for about an hour and a half and just went. I mean, I cut up my hands, but it was actually really kind of cathartic.

You should have hired someone else to do this. Are you a fairy tale character? Where's this cabin you're living in with a little tiny freezer? I literally, I had frogs jumping through my house in the summertime. It was terrible. I'm so glad you left. And then Mr. Tumnus came through with some treats. She lived in a cabin with no parking for a summertime. It was terrible. I'm so glad you left. And then Mr. Tumnus came through with some treats.

She lived in a cabin with no parking for a year. Hire people. Not everyone has put their vagina in a movie, Ricky. Sorry, Kate.

No, it's all right. Kate has enough money to hire someone to do Frost or Freezer. Well, it was kind of fun, though. Well, you know what else is fun? What is fun? Picking a name tag

that's going to win all the prizes tonight because Kate is quite good at this game. I promised this guy Well, it was kind of fun, though. Well, you know what else is fun? What is fun? Picking a name tag. Yeah, let's do it. That's going to win all the prizes tonight, because Kate is quite good at this game. I promised this guy on the street that I would pick his name tag, so I think I've got to do it. That's a great way to do it. What's your name again? Ed.

Oh, Ed. Tyler Perry's Ed's Witness Protection. All right, Ed. You're welcome. That's a good job, yeah. Just hang out up front and be a creep. Oh, Ed. You're welcome. Good job. Yeah, just hang out up front and be a creep. Oh, yeah. She's got to say yes, you know, because they tell you that's the first thing to say is keep him in the building.

We've got people are on their way. Well, if you're in the witness protection program, is your name really Ed? That's terrible. That was a Brie and Kate collabo, by the way. That joke brought to you by Brie. I just said it. Great job, ladies. Thanks.

Teamwork. Let's get somebody else out here. Oh, so what's his name again? Ed. Okay, you're playing for Ed. Yeah. I didn't see this gentleman Oh, so what's his name again? Ed. Okay, you're playing for Ed. Yeah. I didn't see this gentleman backstage, but, you know, he's a prompt fellow, well met.

And so let's say his name out loud and see if he magically appears. Jimmy Pardo, everybody! See how it works? That's how it's done. Jimmy! Jimmy! Hello, Jim.

Ricky. Josh. I don't know you. Oh, I'll take this. Oh, you know what? Did you guys meet? You met last year, right? Did we meet last year, Bree?

How'd that go? Bree was here last year. Yeah, a little dicey, huh? I don't remember a second of it. Well, it's a pleasure to see you again. She had a hat on last year, if that helps you. Oh, you need some head, huh? I don't remember a second of it. Well, it's a pleasure to see you again. She had a hat on last year. Oh, you had some headgear? I think so.

I don't like ladies in hats. I think you wore a hat. Ricky, what world do you live in that somebody can come over and de-ice your freezer for you? Like, do you say she makes enough money? Yeah, sure, I'll take it for that. But who the fuck is doing that?

I live in the world where we steal your seat on a plane. Ah, this broad. Jimmy's still mad at us. Jimmy is still mad at us. I get to Dallas airport. This is a true statement. Yeah, this is real. I'm number one on the list to get the upgrade to first class. And Garfunkel and Oates are sitting there with these grins on their goddamn

faces. And then I say, I go, hey girls, what's going on? They go, we don't even know why. We just got bumped up to first class. Motherfucker. They took my seat. So now I'm back with Besser and Coach.

You and Besser and Daniel Snyder, Rebecca Coach. Yeah, Danielle and Besser and Coach. We were 1A and 1B. I'm in steroids. Why don't you just buy a first class ticket? Because I'm not owned by Legendary. That's shit mate's money. What are you booing?

You're not touching your Legendary money? Are you like Lena with it? Yeah, I just want to hold on to it. Never stop. Never stop. I gotta try to remember to talk about movies at some point Hey, I just came from a movie Oh perfect, let's do this

I came from Stand Up Guys with Al Pacino and Chris Walken And who was the third one? Al Arkin Hoo-ah, I'm Christopher Walken Wait, it's Al Pacino as Christopher Walken? I'm Christopher Walken. Wait, it's Al Pacino as Christopher Walken? I'm assuming. It was a one-man show. It was Elon Gold doing that movie.

Thank you. Thank you. Four people. You're welcome. You're welcome, four people. How was it, Jimmy? What's that? Did you like the film, Stand Up Guys?

No, no. I'll tell you two things. I cried at the end of it, and I thought it stunk. I really did. I thought, I think it's horrible. Yet at the end, I was like, you know what, a little something. Yeah. Sometimes you deserve it after sitting through that shit.

You deserve to have a little. I wanted to talk to one of the other three people that were in the theater and say, I really can't put my mind around this. Did you like this? And I didn't have the balls to do that, because the theater and say, I really can't put my mind around this. Did you like this? And I didn't have the balls to do that because that would require me to talk to somebody and then be stuck in a conversation with some dullard. Alright, so that's Stand Up Guys.

Pacino, Walken, Al Arkin. And what's her name? Judy Punch? Is that that girl's name? Lucy Punch. Lucy Punch. I like her girl's name? Lucy Punch. Lucy Punch. I like her. She's good.

Liked her in the film? Just fine. Jimmy brought a Never Not Funny tote bag for the prize bag. You could use that as the prize bag. That's pretty good. It's not as good as the West Wing signed by the entire cast. Disagree. Depends what you want to do.

Can you carry stuff around when you go to Target? No West Wing picture? You can if you want to look really weird. Your call. That's a weird bag you got there, mister. It's just a photograph. Yeah, I wrapped it around the stuff, stapled it up, called it a bag. Why don't you just use a bag?

That'd be the conversation. Jimmy, would you like to pick a name tag from the people out in the... I gotta go Wonka. I'm a fan of Wonka. Oh, Wonka right away. I love it. That was fast. Oh, it's got some heft to it. Is there a bunch of Hershey bars inside there? No, I made it clear I do not care for you. The last thing you're getting is one of my treats Brie wants all of the chocolate

Wait a minute, wait, hang on, so these are Hershey bars? Yeah, you can tear it up So they're not Wonka bars? No, they're Hershey bars Pass it back, pass it back No, I'm in, I want to have a hunk of chocolate You want one, Brie? I know you like chocolate What's that?

I'm going to take it away from you. What am I, seven? Can I just rip this apart? What's your name, friend? Charlie. Charlie Wonka, get it? It's okay, Stan. I really wish I hadn't done this. You know, like Charlie Wonka. Come on, get with it.

I didn't see the Johnny Depp version. Is that that version? Anybody want in on this? Bree, I know you want something. Yeah, she's going to get some of that Hershey's chocolate. I wait five minutes when I take away this dynamite belt. There it is. May I have one? I'm probably going to keep the rest of them.

Okay. He's got a family to feed Jimmy I was going to give you a check For the podcast-a-thon For the great charity That you do work for every year $114,000 Yes I was going to come out here and hand you a fake check,

but I think we've accomplished the same thing just by mentioning it. Yeah, I think I appreciate that. Yeah, yeah. And people can always go to smiletrain.org, I'm guessing it is. Or just go to podcast.com. There's a link right in there. Yeah, there you go. That way we get the credit, because that's why I do it.

Yeah, yeah. Anything else you need to plug, buddy? I'm in great shape. All right. You know who else is in great shape? Who's that? Chelsea Peretti! There she is!

Hi! Hi! There she is! Hi! Hi! She is passing on the chocolate. Just sit down there with Ricky and Graham and, you know, Chris Hardwick. Just get a hold of a microphone and we'll say hi. What?

Everybody's getting chocolate. That's going to make my job easier. Marie wants to announce she thinks the chocolate's good. I didn't want to announce that. I just said that to myself. That was just for her and people right near her. Scott Aukerman. No, thank you.

Oh, he's good. Does Chelsea have a microphone yet? Let's say hi to everybody, Chelsea. How you doing? Great. Thank you. What did you end up bringing for me to give away? The rest of your beverage?

I don't know. I was going to give away my valet ticket. Well, that's a fun game, and then see which one can convince them that it's your car. Then they just get my car. They just get it. All right, let's do that.

But I can't. I need it. It's the first car I... Anyway, who cares? Listen, I could get my purse and get something out of it. Ugh, I sound like a Jew. Why don't you...

What the fuck? I am. I'm half. I can say whatever I want. Which half? I'll be the judge of that. You'll come down in the favor of it because it's my mom and Jewish people love to tell me I'm Jewish because my mom's Jewish. Even though the Jews in my family

were always fighting over money and they weren't around for me. And the Italians were! We'll be back with another clip from Guilt Trip after this brief message from audiobooks. Are you the arbiter of who gets to make the Jewish jokes and who does not?

It's not me, singularly. He's the Jupiter of who gets to make the Jewish jokes and who does not? It's not me, singularly. It's a body of people. He's the Jupiter of who gets to... Sam Levine is justice. Anti-Semitism has a new enemy. We're going to have to think about this for a few days. Oh shit, it's justice, run! But you don't have to run that fast.

We're going to get back to you. We're gonna make our decision. We'll let you know in like a week or two. Have a good Shabbos. So Chelsea. Yes. Thank you for coming and just maybe

spit your gum into my bag or something. Oh no, not from a distance. Wait, what bag? Are you using slings? This bag right here. Oh, okay. Oh, shit. Way overshot.

Sorry, I overdid it. I didn't say hit that bag in the audience over there. That's my wife. Did anyone find that gum? I will give someone $20 to pick that gum off the floor and put it in their mouth. He's going to do it. He's going to do it. Don't do it.

Don't you fucking do it, you weirdo. You goddamn weirdo. You goddamn weirdo. Well earned. What the fuck is wrong with you? Take off that fucking sweater! Oh my God, this is a terrible time to say I have mono. That was...

I have mono! I don't think I've ever spent a better $20 in my entire life. When did you become the host of Let's Make a Deal? Yeah, because I always picked gum off the floor on Let's Make a Deal. I'll take the box or the gum on the floor, Monty. Is that still the shipmates' money? Yeah. The $60 you've dropped tonight?

Oh, shit, that was $60, wasn't it? Fuck. Oh. Oh shit, that was 60, wasn't it? Fuck Jimmy's done Oh, he's gonna That's good We need a monitor for all the rappers We don't want to throw them around on the floor It's a nice facility Okay, thanks Charlie

We're gonna play the game We've got We still have got several more guests In 90 minutes We're gonna start explaining play the game We've got We still have got Several more guests In 90 minutes We're going to start Explaining how the game Is played No everybody

Everybody knows How the game is played Yeah Good luck Chris won't Blurt the answer out The second it comes Into his head

One time Doug Like two years ago Shut up You were there Oh it was so cocky. I did, I totally fucked it up. You know, it was hour seven of I Love Movies, and I just, I forgot.

I didn't say you could stop chewing the gum. You gotta keep it in there. Oh, really? Like, what, do you have him for like an hour? I think he did enough. He put it in his mouth. That's all he was supposed to do. Technically, he could have kept his fingers around

and just put it all in his mouth. It was in my mouth. But he really ate it. I love that. I didn't know you were going to be sitting there moving me along, but I appreciate it. Yeah, let's bring somebody else out here. See?

Chelsea, pick a name tag who you want to lose for tonight. That is true. I should pick someone I dislike. Just off vibes. No, I was going to do Kevin because of the gum he ate, but then I really will lose. That's the problem.

That's alright. He doesn't have a good name tag. What about you seem like you don't want me to pick you. Yeah, pick somebody who's hiding their name tag right now. Therefore, that makes me want you to lose. No, I don't know.

I'll do you. Because I don't usually interact with blonde girls. Do I give it to you? You hang on to it. What's her name? My name's Chelsea. And this is Bianca. And what is that?

What is her name tag? Was I not supposed to say that? Can you describe it? No, yeah, that's good. Okay. Well, everyone hates me, I guess. It's called... Her name's over the thing.

Oh, Miami Connection. It's a DVD. Oh, okay. Our new cult movie, Obsession, says Clark Collis Entertainment Weekly. Yeah, they got robots writing the reviews over there now. But I've heard good things about that movie. I don't think anyone on the panel

has seen it, but I've heard it's very entertaining. Well, that's great. That's great. Good job, Bianca. Got that plug in there. Good work. Alright, so now we can officially move on, Brady. We can do it.

There's not seven more. Math whiz. There's five or six. Yeah, we'll rip through it. Do you need to go to the bathroom or something? Kind of? You got time. I know I have time.

Okay, Mike Furman is here, everybody. Thank you. Co-creator of the theme song with Chris Hardwick, Hard and Firm. He brought his CD, Mike Furman, the very last songs I will ever record. Wait, there's a part one. Oh, part one. At the end of that. Very important. The punchline part.

The part that makes it not my suicide note. I had my thumb over the punchline. A lifelong excuse. Thanks for coming, Mike, and for singing at the top of the show. You were playing the guitar, right? Yes, I was. Thank for coming, Mike. Hey, thank you. And for singing at the top of the show. And you were playing the guitar, right?

Yes, I was. Thank you. Yeah, yeah. My pleasure. Well done. And what do you got going on? Can people purchase this from the internet? Yeah, on iTunes or mikeferman.com.

One could find that. Right on. What else are you doing these days? I am changing a lot of diapers I am being a dad Because that's Yeah That's why you

Being a father That's why you weren't here last year For this particular event Is because I had a kid being born Yeah right Right around it Around it yeah

Yeah And so now the kid's one years old Now he's one years old Nicely done Still pooping in his pants But he's one years old He can walk's one years old. Nicely done. Still pooping in his pants, but he's one years old. He can walk, but he's walking with poop in his pants. Does he enjoy motion pictures yet?

We have just started showing him, like, he watches some cartoons. He watches, like, Curious George and stuff. But things move so fast, I feel nervous about showing him stuff like he's going to. I feel like there's a, it's already kind of a blurry line as to what's reality with him so I feel like too many things and he's going to start like flipping out as to what is real does that make sense? not at all but that's

what makes you a good dad you're thinking about shit like that you're on it, you're on the case the older one I'm already showing I've shown him some like Muppets and superheroes and stuff. He watches a lot of, I showed him a clip of the Hulk way

too soon. Like I showed him when he was like a year and a half old. We were watching something on YouTube, something you know, like the flying scene from Superman. Like the can you read my mind thing which is the most vanilla, bland, can't, oh no, there's nothing you can, you could be it.

Nothing good about that scene. Right, but there's nothing dangerous or horrible, except somebody on the internet made a version where, I don't know if you guys remember the scene, but he's flying with Lois Lane, he extends her hand out, they're flying at fingertips, and then she goes a little too far, falls, right, and I know that's part of the scene. He goes down, swoops her up. But somebody had edited together where she falls, ah, cut to Superman, look to camera, smile,

fly off into the sunset. Whoa, that doesn't actually happen like that. He goes, ah. Yeah, so. Yeah, and in the You Might Also Likes, there was a thing for the Hulk, which I thought, you know, I know the Hulk doesn't kill anybody.

You know, it's the Eric Bana movie. I know he just smashes stuff and throws stuff around. So I was like, yeah, he could probably watch that. All right. So he goes, I want to watch the big boy. I said, okay, yeah, we can watch the big boy. So the Hulk comes out, screaming his head off and punching everything.

He's going, ah! And immediately he's like, no, no, no, no. I'm like, Oh God,

no, that's terrible. That's, I don't know why that would be okay to show a rage monster to a little while other adults are screaming for help. Let's yeah. So have you used big boy is like the guy who's going to come if he's not good or he, he actually for a solid year,

every night before he went to bed, we'll say, uh, no big boy come to my house before he went to bed, will say, no big boy come to my house. I'll say, no. No, no big boy come to your house. Not if you're good, son. Yeah, exactly.

Are we talking about the DJ big boy? He hates Power 106. Hates. Does not tolerate. He's like, it's the same phone call every morning. I think we have four more to bring out. Gas, let's get it. Oh, yeah, so how does it work?

I'm going to go with... I fetch you... I fetch a cood. A fish a cood day. What? A fish a cood day, right on. A fish a cooday A fish a cooday, right on A fish a cooday Thank you sir That's trying to mean something tonight With Gabinucci over there

Or whatever the other one was It's Peretti Peretti Knip knop, what was it? Gershabad? She's laughing louder than anyone. Gershabad? Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh... Gersh I'm never going to get that. And we can just call you E? I.

Okay, whatever. Tonight on a very racist Doug Loves Movies, two people with non-American names dare to step into the show. Watch what happens. Why do you say non-American? That's actually really ignorant. I said non-American names. You probably didn't hear me

because you were thinking about yourself. I heard you. I heard you. Nerdist. Nerdist, TM, good one. It wasn't him. That was the puppet. He's making you so hilarious.

It's magical, that puppet. What are you guys looking for? Is there a problem? A nose. You knocked the nose off of the puppet? That's some serious... Okay, so pronounce it for us, Mike Furman. Efece Kude. Yeah.

There you go. Wow. Efece Kude. It's a cool name. It's a great name. All right. Sorry, Efece. What?

I shortened it a little. Yeah. Let's get him out here. Like you know who it is because you're following along alphabetically. Kevin Pollack is here! Kevin Pollack! Thank you, Kevin. No, no, we don't need to hear from you.

Entrance was big enough. I used all my time bowing. Yeah, yeah. That was great, though. Thank you so much. And you're contributing a copy of your recently published book, How I Slept My Way to the Middle. Yes.

Part one. Part one. I said it this time. It's autographed to the winner. If you look inside, you'll see I personalized it to the winner. To your name here? Yeah.

Good work. Thank you so much. It took an hour to come up with that joke. I thought it would land. I'm not going to lie to you. I really thought it would land. I've been having fun playing on Hollywood Poker. Oh, happy at Thread.

Yeah, I heard you. Yeah, you hooked me up with it. Now I'm addicted to it. And there's another tournament coming up. Big charity tournament this Saturday. Saturday, 22nd, 10 a.m. on your West Coast. Yeah, and how do people sign up for it? Just go to the Facebook, dial in the Hollywood Poker.

It takes 30 seconds to sign up. It's free. And you play with celebrities. Josh Molina might be there. Really? Yeah. Is everything all right behind me? I want to play poker with him.

Is someone slowly entering me? What's happening? They're just setting up a system of levers and pulleys. I don't know what they're up to. These seats have no footrest, so our legs are just dangling and our butts are falling asleep. So Sam went and got a chair

but it's too high, so we're just awkwardly leaning on this chair. It's not too high for me, Chris. Doug, I have a question for Jimmy Pardo. Oh, please. If I may? Yeah, sure. Can we get a microphone over to Jimmy?

Yeah. My question for Mr. Pardo is, why didn't you like the movie, you fuck? Ah! I thought you were terrific, Chris. It was Al that let me down. I don't understand. What exactly about the film did you not enjoy?

Mr. Arkin, I thought you were terrific. Again, it was Mr. Pachito I did not care for. What the fuck is your problem? It was Lucy Punch I did not care for, sir. You were terrific. Quick, do your Lucy Punch voice. Do it.

I'm Lucy Punch. They made the film so I could have an extra 15 minutes in my act. That's the only reason. That's why I was very sad to hear it's not funny. I guess you could have fun with that. I'm going to eat chocolate now. Should I pick a name? Yes, please.

Okay. Go Giants. Go Giants will probably do it. Chocolate's flying. Kevin is looking amongst the usual suspects. Kevin, I'm that narcissistic. Oh, Kevin's going to play for Kevin. That makes it easier for me. I wish everybody would do that.

Especially Chris and Ricky. All right, so you're playing for Kevin, and he's got a Price is Right name tag. Let's move it along. Yeah, that was, yeah. It says a shithead on the back for reasons that will be revealed later. Yeah, yeah, wait. You have to wait until the end.

Because, did you put a shithead on the back of the Grinch book? Yeah, there's one on the back of the Grinch book, too. It's, I'll say it at the end of the show. If you lose, I will say what she's losing. She really likes whatever was in the back of Kevin's name tag. Now I want to see it. Can I see it, Kevin? Out of curiosity? Oh, I see.

It's a funny sentence if you don't know the setup at all. Like, to just see that is a shithead is funny. It's funny. Kevin, now I hope you win so we never get to say it on the podcast. Yeah, that would be great. That would be great if that happened.

Okay, three more guests to go. Please welcome Alphabetical Brian Poussaint. Brian was kind enough to bring a copy of Sarah Silverman's program Season 3, of which he was a hilarious cast member One of the bigger cast members

Hey buddy How you doing? Welcome to public transport This is what sharing an office with him was like Why would you sit like that in the office? I hate sitting in coach Who hates it more, you or the person next to you? Them, way more I am stinky and fat

My fat stinks too, you should smell it Thank you But maybe Chris will make a wager with an audience member Can you guys see my butt crack good? Oh yeah we can Yeah we got it okay You got that shit? Now I got some place to put my foot.

I'm good. Sorry, ma'am. Look away. Mr. Tummins! Get out of there! Brian, you got anything you want to plug? No.

You got any road dates coming up? Oh, yeah. Or should people just go to brianposain.com? I'm in Vancouver. That place that you were just at. Comedy Mix. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm there. What? Oh, Nerd Poker for this guy. Brian's new podcast is called Nerd Poker. It's over at Earwolf. No, no. It's a great show. I'm doing a show for Earwolf, and it's a bunch of people you know.

You can tell. People love it already. You're two episodes in, and it's way up there in the rankings. Yeah, but none of these people are the fuck. No one clapped. I listened to all the way up when you started playing the game,

then I stopped listening because then I thought, well, that's just going to be like how it used to be when Brian would start playing and I would leave. Yeah, but stick around, because Blaine says stupid shit. Oh, I'm sure it's hilarious,

but you know what I mean. I could have listened to that shit for years now, and I never did. Why would I start now? What a strange iTunes review. Stay away from the Airwolf page and iTunes. Thanks. No, people are going to love it.

They do already love it. It's doing well. It's great. Does Blaine do a bunch of fat pussy jokes? He texted me hundreds of her pussy is so fat jokes over a week long period. Also not healthy. Not a ton, but I get those texts too. He'd call me and he wouldn't even say hi.

He'd just go, her pussy's so fat it has a pussy bjorn. When her pussy dies, it's going to be, they're going to have to use formaldehyde. Her pussy is asked to be whipped cremated. That's how fat it is. That's really fat. That's a fat pussy.

Because it's asking for things. Her pussy's so fat, her pap Because it's asking for things. Her pussy's so fat, her pap smear was directed by James Cameron. Anybody else got one? Her pussy's so fat, when it flies, it has to request two planes. Not two seats, two planes. Two planes. Brie Larson's making the unhappy face Her pussy's so fat

It's requested an open graveyard funeral Open graveyard Kevin Pollack I'm one of the new kids You like the alternative comedy you like what his kids are doing you proud of us give him a mic i love that the 40 year olds are still alternative yeah no i know yeah yeah I love that the 40 year olds are still alternative Yeah, no, I know

Oh Bobby Slayton gives me so much shit He calls me one of the kids still and I'm 46 and he says I'm esoteric Farts are not esoteric I

Right? Compared to his Your farts are more esoteric than his farts. No, but I mean me talking about farts for 45 minutes is not esoteric. Well, if you don't mind trying some jokes out right now, we'd all love to hear them. Because there's nothing better to follow up pussy than the... Her pussy farts are so fat. Yeah, yeah.

Pick a name tag, Brian. Just pick a name tag. Skeeving everybody out. Who's laughing? I didn't even know you were here. Fuck. Ryan. Okay. Okay.

The crowd goes wild So exciting That was like the worst pick In like a high school team Fuck Ryan You got him I thought you picked him already So he just picked out A Saving Private Ryan DVD And put Ryan on there

Pretty much in there already Yeah Didn't have to do anything out a Saving Private Ryan DVD and put Ryan on there. It's pretty much in there already, yeah. Didn't have to do anything. Gets a little extra points for effort. It's not the worst one out there. That's the criteria which they should all be judged. Well, congratulations, Ryan, for not being the worst one out there.

And thank you, Brian, for being here. You and I used to play the Letter Moulton game together, just sitting around with this next guest. Please welcome everybody, Sarah Silverman. There's only weird back row seats left. Get ready to dangle. Might have a couple of those in my chamber. Really? How fat was that pussy? It was fat.

It was fat. It was fat. That is perfect podcast material. You brought a Walking Dead doll of Daryl? Yep. That's pretty cool. That's Daryl. I received that. Talking Dead gift basket. Yep. That's Daryl. I don't know why you wouldn't keep that. Talking dead gift basket.

Yep. That's what you get. So that's kind of from Chris and I. Yeah. Paying it forward. Fun item like that. Oh, and another. This is King Candy from Wreck-It Ralph.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, it's delightful, don't you know? Shut up, Graham. Good old two dicks. So, uh... What? Alan Two Dicks is the voice of King Candy, yeah. There's another...

It's last name isn't Two Dicks. Whatever you say, fart jokes. There's something else in here, Sarah? For reals? Is there really something else in here? There isn't? Uh-uh What was there supposed to be?

The paper towel that I... Oh, that's right I thought it was just a lining on the bottom of the bag This was the paper towel that was... What is it? The last wipe? The final wipe from my pee Yeah, so it didn't really get...

Give that guy 20 bucks and he'll fucking eat it. Put that guy in a creepy sweater. He'll eat anything. Put this in your mouth for 20 bucks. Put it in your mouth, weirdo. You goddamn human goat. That guy's in the emergency room already.

She even wrote on it, Sarah Silverman final wipe. Come on, buddy. Who wants syphilis? Oh, really? That's where you guys moan? Fat pussy jokes. Ah, ha, ha. Hey, syphilis. Not tonight. Not in our house. Not in our name.

Yeah, I was making an NYPD blue that's Andy Zipowitz character this guy with a beard who looks like a serial killer is leaving

because he's a big Andy Zipowitz fan sorry guys all the NYPD blue people my bad well thanks for bringing that Sarah and Bree has a question

real quick what's up Bree Bree yes I forgot you got a pick I just wanted to play. She's very excited about the Leonard Maltz game. But you know, we gotta give them their time. I didn't realize that it reveals that I like the rough stuff

with the wiping. I like to use the paper towels. I didn't even think about that. Now I have. I love it. Her pussy's so fat it's social security number is one. No, I didn't get it.

I didn't get it. I didn't do it right. That would be, her pussy would be old if it was one. I'm aware. I'm aware. Check into it on social. one made specifically for Sarah it's a wreck it Ralph sign direct Jerick Jerick Jerick Jerick it's your wreck it Ralph if we could play that game if Jerick. Jerick it. That doesn't work. Jerick it, Ralph. We could play that game if Jerick had a movie named after his first name.

You know the name? The game. Are we going to play that game? No, we're playing the Leonard Maltin game. I know, but sometimes we play the other game too. Not tonight. We don't have that kind of time. Who's next?

This has already been an hour and 18 minutes. Her pussy's so fat you can check into it on Foursquare. That's Kevin Pollack's joke. Oh, threw him under the bus right away when people didn't respond. Why would you do that? Comedy violates

the cardinal comedy rule. And you bailed out before you even finished it. Alright, boys, let's get back to the joke. He has a lot more money than I do. He can afford it. Her pussy's so big it swallowed the bus you threw him under. Chris Hardwick, ladies and gentlemen. Chris Hardwick.

Sorry, that's my stripper DJ voice. Come to the main stage, stripper. Chris Hardwick, throwing people under the bus. And chastity. It's a weird strip club. It's really... I'm sure the final guest is absolutely loving this. He left. I thought it was funny.

This rep right now. But I'd like to get him out here. Ladies and gentlemen, back after a one-year absence because of holiday stuff, Paul F. Tompkins. Paul F. Tompkins. Somewhere over there. I apologize. I apologize.

Oh, Graham is here. I wasn't sure. Backstage, I wasn't sure if he was here or not. Oh, no. Oh, no. Well, well. Okay, well, we're all rooting for one person to be the first one out. Paul, what's going on? Any plugs?

Doug, I would just like everyone to continue to enjoy me and what I do. I do comedy on various platforms and it's just fun. It's just fun. Sounds good.

And would you care to pick out a name tag? Yes, I will. I got to go for this. They're in 3D. Classy. Classy hat. Right here. Classy hat.

It's Brian. I'm playing for Brian Brian big hat Brian he put wow there it is I feel like this takes some of the edge

off the class of a top hat you look like a Dick Van Dyke sketch character Dick Van Dyke sketch character yeah when he would do the sketches on the shows.

Do you mean on the Alan Brady show? Yes. The Alan Brady show. Absolutely. Are you calling him Maury Amsterdam? Yeah, he's the Maury Amsterdam of podcasts. Look it up. Is it because my mouth is so wet when I talk?

Right, he did. And his wife's name was Bubbles? Pickle. Hello, young people. Isn't it like we know the Nick Van Dyke show from its original airings? We know it from reruns. That's right, Sarah.

And everyone else doesn't know it at all. Uh-oh. We've got a situation with... Too much for Chelsea. Somebody's bolting. We've got a runner. Brie, could you go get her? Could you go with her?

Make sure she's all right? No, we're good. If she leaves the perimeter, the collar will detonate. No, she told me where she's going. She has to take a shit. Oh! Oh, she went to go and grab her shit bag. What happened?

You just decided your purse shouldn't be sitting back there? Yeah, I don't like leaving my purse back there. Sorry. That's all right. Chelsea, I feel like I let you down. I was the last person back there. I should have brought your purse out, and I apologize. Apology accepted.

Me too. Thank you. Chris, are you ready also? You ready? Ready. Okay. Shall we continue? Yeah, let's play.

I think we can finally do it. We've got to finish this in an hour and seven minutes. I can do it in an hour and six minutes. For all this time, she still doesn't get it. Alright, so we're not going to switch the order around because that gets too complicated and there's so many people it's not like the same scenario is going to recur until we get down to fewer people.

You know what I'm talking about, right, Jimmy? I'm doing good. Doug, you talking about recurring scenarios? That's correct. I don't think we have to worry about them tonight. It could be an issue. Each one of you is a snowflake. An unpredictable snowflake.

So let's start with down here on this end. Bree's been so excited about this game. let's start with down here on this end Bree's been so excited about this game let's start with Bree and then we'll just go around this way and yeah let's get her a microphone so that she can respond

into it, here you go she's saying no, I don't care if the podcast listeners hear me hello podcast people are sitting alone going hello Bree you go. She's saying, no, I don't care if the podcast listeners hear me. Hello, podcast. People are sitting alone going, hello, Bree. She said, hi. Okay, you get to pick between three categories submitted

by people on Twitter. By Twitter? On Twitter. Is that a reliable source? Source? I mean, I figure out. You'll see. On Twitter. Is that a reliable source? Source? I mean, I figure out. You'll see. You pick. Yeah, yeah, you'll see.

Oh, good enough to overthrow Iran, not good enough for Doug Loves Movies. Okay, carry on. Rob Reed photo is the Twitter handle. Yeah, so you've got to plug in there. Good old Rob Reed and his photography. And the category is

Paranormal Nativity. And that's a Christmas movie that has ghosts in it. Or, at Yellow Kitchener, for whatever reason, suggested Peace on earth which is movies in which someone is wearing a toupee sincere laughter from Jimmy Pardo

one more at Tim Babb comedian suggested Noel, Noel and that's movies that have no L in the title whatsoever like Jaws would be an example and that's movies that have no L in the title. Whatsoever. Like Jaws would be an example.

Santa. Rocky. I don't think Santa is a movie. Bad Santa. Like a weird word association game all of a sudden. Okay, so pick a category. I'm going to go with paranormal nativity. Okay. Please.

Now you get to pick a year. Would you like a movie that has Christmas and ghosts in it from 1988 or 2009? 2009. Here we go. Two and a half stars from Leonard for this movie that he calls a retelling. So it's been told before. And he says that

that's a the story is still effective. Terrible clues. And he lists about eight names. Eight names. Eight names. Yeah, so how many names do you think you can get it in?

Probably do about... Probably about eight, you think? Probably about eight names. Okay. Probably about eight names. I think eight is... Sounds about right to me. Smart bid, sure.

Yeah. Then we go to Kevin Pollack. Sup? How many names do you think you can get it in? Seven Seven? Josh Molina From Television Scandal

No, I'm just kidding Six, sure Sure Thank you for the support. Scott Aukerman. I'm counting on Scott wanting to be out first. Yeah, you're in a really good position to get kicked out here, Scott. What'd you say?

I said six. Six names. I'll say five. Is this going to be fun? Yes. Brian, we're doing great on time Brian Five is the last one?

Mm-hmm Four, right? You got Ricky Lindholm right there I'll do three names Yeah, see that's what's gonna happen there I mean, can I just say pass? You have to say name it to Ricky And then she gets three names

And if she fails to name it You will still remain And she will have to leave Okay, name it Then of course if she gets it correct You will have to leave You'll be forced it correct, you will have to leave. You'll be forced

to go put your purse backstage again. Alright, do you want the clues again, Ricky? No. Perfect. Your three names are Daryl Sabara, Fianola Flanagan,

Fianola, Formica Flanagan Sure Fianola For Micah Flanagan And Carrie Elwes Is it A Christmas Carol? Yes Bye Chelsea

Yeah you can go You're free to go Sorry Chelsea Chelsea Peretti everybody Wait don't forget your drink no I don't want it thank you so much yeah yeah put it in the bag here

thank you does it have a shit in the back? no? okay so we'll have to bag here. Thank you. Does it have a shit-out on the back? No? Okay. Do you reimburse for valet? I'll get you later on the valet. Wow, the bookies are really upset because that was way too predictable. Are you just going to hang out? I have to go

Oh okay That came out in the movie theater A Christmas Carol 2009 Yeah there was a remake It was like a Robert Zemeckis remake It was a Zemeckis computer Oh CGI

Oh the reimagining Yeah reimagining There can't be that many with ghosts in them. Ding, dong, ding, dong, dong. Body movement of the whistle is really the thing about it. That's why I asked you that. There's a podcast. All right.

Okay. Hey, Whistler. Whistler, you're up. All right, myler. Whistler, you're up. All right, my bad. You're up. You're up. Starting with Graham this round, you guys. Amanda Johnson.

Johnson, S-U-N instead of S-O-N. Weirdo. I know. She suggested on the Twitter, Tinseltown, which is movies that are set in L.A. Tinseltown, which is movies that are set in L.A. Or Sex Bob-omb with two B's at the end, suggested Iceman Cometh, and that's movies where Val Kilmer has sex.

And... And at Tangrape suggested Tangrape, Falcon and the Snowman, and that's movies that have Timothy Hutton and a snowman. What? Yeah, deal with it. I... Tinseltown films in LA.

The other one is of course Val Kilmer sex sex robs which is which is Kevin Pollack's choice you do you you do who you are

um I will go with um I will go with uh yeah we'll go Iceman Cometh we'll do Iceman Cometh

okay oh my god Baba Ganoush you got the greatest laugh in the world you know what I mean with... Yeah, we'll go Iceman Cometh. We'll do Iceman Cometh. Okay. Oh my God, Baba Ganoush, you got the greatest laugh in the world. You know what I mean? Her fucking laugh is just a bowl of giggles. It's so great. Yeah, Gungum style, I love your fucking name. I love your name. I love a good weird name.

This movie from 2003 is a bomb, according to Leonard. He says it is tedious and that it is filled with characters it's impossible to care about. Of course, one of those characters is played by the great Val Kilmer, and Leonard lists about 14 names.

How many names do you think you can get it in? Graham Elwood. 2003, yes. I'll go 12 names. What a cagey player you are. And I'm sad to say you were going to be around for a little while. Paul F. Tompkins.

2008. Tedious. Three. 2003. Still tedious five years afterwards. That's right. Leonard wrote his review

in 2008. Impossible to care about the characters. Including Val Kilmer. You said how many names? Twelve, sir. Twelve, sir. Fourteen. Thank you, sir. I'm going to say eleven names. Well played, sir. Thank you, sir.

This is like Lincoln This is how gentlemen play How dare you That was the best guy in Lincoln I think he'll get it in 11 names so I'm gonna say 10 names just to hope it continues

I will say ten names just to hope it continues. I will say nine names. Eight. Mike Furman, Chris Hardwick, Sam Levine. Chris Hardwick named that movie. Yeah. Little Wolverine's Claws just came out. Hurts every time.

What did you say, two names? No, I said eight. You get eight names? I do. All right, out of 14. He knows I don't know what this is. I don't know that. All right.

If I say seven, I don't know what this is. Let me walk you through it, Chris. Oh my God, Sam Levine. Don't be bringing that poker table bullshit. Doug loves movies. I don't know. It could be seven. I might have no idea what this movie is. I'm just playing the odds. Maybe I got hit in the head with a brick

and I don't remember what movies are anymore. Who knows? It's not on me, Paul. It's on Chris. He's playing the numbers. He's doing Doug loves movies are anymore. Who knows? It's not on me, Paul. It's on Chris. He's playing the numbers. He's doing Doug Loves Movies money ball. He's playing the percentages. I hope when you first said that, Paul, that it sounded like that was an audience member.

Because you weren't on mic, but it was loud. I hope people think that some guy in the audience just snapped. Okay, Chris, let me walk you through it. Leonard calls it a bomb. Val Kilmer has some sex in it. Okay. Leonard calls it tedious.

If anything could be tedious in 2003, it was such a wonderful... And he says it's filled with characters it's impossible to care about and your eight names are Val Kilmer no settle down Josh Ted Levine

okay got it put the lotion on the bucket Put the lotion in the bucket. You can do it. Put the lotion in the bucket. Oh, Buffalo Bane. The lotion is Gotham's reckoning. Oh, you mean that fat girl?

You mean that big fat Batman? That big fat Batman? You mean that big fat Batman? That big fat Batman? Theatricality and human skin are... I'm out of the riff. I thought we only had one master impressionist on this panel. I can do anybody as Bane. I'm Christopher Walken.

Hoo-ah! Not you. I wasn't talking about you. Ted Levine. Faison Love. Carrie Fisher. Okay. Yeah, I can't believe that. You're pretty short to be a Jedi What the fuck is wrong with you? Frankie G was in this movie

Frankie G Janine Garofalo Natasha Gregson Wagner Christina Applegate And Eric Boghossian there that's I think that's eight is that eight there's only one movie that I can think the Val Kilmer did around that time but I don't remember if he had sex in it but it was a really good movie so I don't know

think he had sex in that movie where he played a porn star? Because you're thinking of... It's the one where he plays John Holmes! Yeah, what are you thinking of, though? No, I was thinking of... What are you thinking of? What? Yeah, what are you thinking of?

Oh, what was it fucking called? You didn't have that one either? No, no, that was the one. Kate Bosworth was in that, and he plays John Holmes. What the fuck? You want to give him more clues? Wow! No, is he didn't know it, and he was going to say some other movie, That was the one. Kate Bosworth was in that. And he plays John Holmes. What the fuck? You want to give him more clues? Wow.

No, is he didn't know it. And he was going to say some other movie. Or he was acting like he was going to. I know the movie. I cannot for the life of me remember the name of it. Okay, perfect. He loses. Yeah.

I can't remember the name of it. It was... Yeah. It was... My name is Val Kilmer and I have a giant dick. But I'm going to get fat in nine years. But you didn't think it was the porn movie because you wouldn't have said, I wonder if he has sex in this. No, I was thinking of Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, which was a great movie.

I don't think he had man sex in that. He was gay in that, right? Is this 2003? Is this before or after he was Moses at the Kodak Theater? Previous. I feel like that would help. And the motion picture is called Wonderland. Oh, that's what I... the motion picture is called Wonderland. Oh,

that's what I... Chris Hardwick, ladies and gentlemen. I'm not gonna leave. Oh, that might be a first that just still sitting there. Now I'm free

to roam wherever I choose. Hello, Brian Poseidon. Hi, buddy. I miss you. I'm better than Patton. Oh, I don't know.

We'll see. I've been looking for a new friend. He's busy all the time. Kate Micucci. Starting with you. All right. He's busy all the time. Kate McEuchie. Starting with you. All right. Oh, wait. I think this microphone has gone around.

Oh, my God, you guys. So many microphone problems. What must the audience think of us? Thank you. Sir, do you look at me, sir? How come nobody in Lincoln, when they were having all those arguments, how come nobody said,

hold on, hold on, we all look ridiculous. We're more similar than we are dissimilar. That movie took place in November, right? They were all growing that just for that month for fun. Sure. Sure. That's right.

That's what that movie was about. All right, Kate. You get to pick a category. Okay. Nick Canadian, N-I-A Suggested Django All The Way And that's movies where Jamie Foxx has sex People love the so and so having sex category And I can't disagree with them

At B. Groon G-R-U-H-N Suggested We Three Kings And that's movies with master class actors Cube, Clooney, or Wahlberg. Three Kings. Or, at Pat Kierman, K-E-A-R-M-A-N,

suggested Flu Season and that's movies in which someone goes down a chimney. I'd like to go with We Three Kings. Okay, This movie has one of those three, one or more of those three actors I mentioned. Ice Cube,

Clooney, and Wahlberg. Two and a half stars from Leonard. The year is 2000. He says that this movie, its characters and story points

are bathed in cliche. That sounds relaxing. Yes. Well, that's funny you should mention that because he also calls it... He calls it noisy. At first I thought it was nosy and I thought that's a weird thing to call a movie.

That movie was nosy. That movie was all in my business. No, he says it's noisy. And he lists 13 names. Kate McGoochie, just right before Jimmy Pardo. I'm going to go back to Bree. I can say, wait, 13 names would

then bring this to Jimmy, right? Get out of here! I don't blame you. Who was that guy? So I'll say 13 names. He was dressed like a burglar. He's one of the wet bandits.

He was dressed like a burglar. He's one of the wet bandits. So you said 13, Kate? Okay, Jimmy? Dozen. Wait, a baker's dozen? 12, 12 names. She went baker, she went regular.

Dozen names. So you can say 11. I'm going Lazy Baker. Are you telling me what to say? Are you feeding me my life? I'm just saying, you know, that's a smart bid. Yeah, I will do one less than a dozen. Okay, 11. Kevin?

I will do two less than a dozen. Oh, 10, I think. 10, right? All right, I'll go nine. Let me grab a calculator. Scott? I feel like I'll go eight. Can you win a calculator. Scott? I feel like I'll go 8. Can you win this game

without ever having to answer a question? Yeah, actually, yes. That's my strategy. What did he say? 7, right? Yeah. Name that movie. Oh!

She's tired of getting fat-armed over there. Trying to send the giant home. Okay, Brian. My arm is so fat. I'm going to miss. You can check into it on Foursquare. You did write that joke You get seven names, Brian Do you want the clues again, Brian?

Yeah, give me the fucking clues Alright, it's noisy What stupid year did this come out? 2000 It's noisy Two and a half stars And out of the 13 names You get seven did this come out? 2,000. It's noisy. Two and a half stars. And out of the 13 names you get,

seven, and they are Michael Ironside, Christopher McDonald, Bob Gunton, Cherry Jones, Karen Allen, Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio,

and Alan Payne. And Brian, remember, it's simply bathed in cliches. Oh yes, I forgot. What... Even if I go out, can I watch him and Pardo fight? Yeah. It's a fun thing going on.

Yeah, you can hang out. Can we have the last two or three of those again? So it was Karen Allen was in it. Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio. 2000. Christopher McDonald. Michael Ironside.

And so it's got either Cube or fucking Clooney or that other asshole. Who was the other one? So it sounds like you've really narrowed it down to about 72 films.

Fuck. I... Hmm. No, I don't got it. That's a shame. I kind of want to guess. Oh, yeah, that's what I would do in this situation. Mary Elizabeth Munster and Karen Owen.

Yeah, guess. The year sounds wrong. Guess it up. Just spit it out. Mary Elizabeth Munster and Karen Owen yeah guess the year sounds wrong guess it up just spit it out just say it it's so wrong say it no

no Congo yeah and a Congo yeah just say a bunch of words I don't know no I got it

I don't got it the perfect storm perfect storm with Clooney and Wahlberg. Yeah, the deuce. Oh, fuck. Thank you for playing Brian Poussin, everybody. Brian Poussin.

It's always movies I would never fucking see. At the end, yeah, if you lose. Brian, give me your name tag. Every movie can't be Star Wars, Brian. Okay, that's got a good show now. It was mostly for one gentleman, but there was collateral damage in that. Brian. damage in that years of try just trying to see the TV and you do what's that

all right nice job Ricky Ricky Lindholm knocking him out this means we're down to Graham again. And Graham gets to pick. At JRC underscore YYZ suggested second helpings. And that's Christmas movie sequels. Second helpings. Yeah, spread out a little bit there. Kevin's running this like a poker game. We lost a couple people at the table. Let's move our chairs around.

At CPF for Life suggested clear and present manger. And that's films where there are Christmas presents. Wow, so just movies. He's just listening. Yes, yes, you're right. Most movies have Christmas presents. These are films that take place on a day of the week. These are movies that end in A.

What's happening? Oh, no, it's on again. It's on again. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Not tonight, guys. This is why you have to be here for the 12 Guests of Christmas. Because the best stuff is not going to happen to your ears. And at I-I-E-Y-E-M the Walrus, I am the Walrus, suggested this is a 40.

And that's movies with either old or English in the title. This is a 40. I'll go this is a 40. All right. Hi. Graham, would you like a movie with either old or English in the title from 1989 or 1995?

89. All right. That's right. Three stars from Leonard for this movie that he says is intense, epic, has its share of

flaws. Rich atmosphere. Rich. Superlative star performances. I've said too much. Nine names. How many? Eight. English or old?

Paul. 89, you say? Uh-huh. That's a great Alex Trebek impression. Yep. You said how many? Eight. He said eight.

I'm going to say... Yeah, nine names total. I said eight. All right. I'm going to say seven. Sarah Silverman. Slow clap in the back Slow clap in the back The little slow clap that couldn't Sarah

You know what's going on right Well yeah I'm just like Sarah? You know what's going on, right? Well, yeah, I'm just like, I feel like, will he get it in seven? If so, I should gamble with by saying six on either myself or that he's confident. Oh, you mean the rules? Look how proud he is. Even from the back, I can see his smile.

Smiling dirty ear. I'm not lying. I'll say sex. It's got old or English in the title? Mm-hmm. I can't even think of any movies that have old or English in the title. Okay, Pokermouth.

Six? Yeah, she said six, Mike. Still a lot left. Still a lot of names. If you do it it Sam will fuck you You might not even know Yeah yeah Don't forget

Don't forget Chris isn't here I mean it's possible He's never heard of this movie I'm the ghost of Christmas Passed by And don't let Sam Fuck you

The way he fucked me No I'm an Adam Sandler Character Listen Doug While Mike is thinking I realized I forgot all the way for me. Now I'm an Adam Sandler character. Listen, Doug, while Mike is thinking, I realized I forgot to contribute to the prize bag. And this is weird,

but all I have is this disc three of this family guy DVD set. I don't know how I ended up with it, but I've been I mean I've been trying to find the person who has the other two kids another Christmas miracle

and the callback award for best callback of 2012 yeah just chuck it over here it's so precious I gotta tell you how terrified I was when I realized, oh, I don't know if Kate if she announced that she had just the two discs

of this thing. And I realized this is probably not going to go anywhere. And then, what a relief. Everyone loved it. Absolutely beautiful. Paul, that was tremendous, what you did. We have all laughed so much joy you've brought

what are you going to do Mike? five Sam Levine Sam the man Lil Wolverine with this fancy footstool oh it's so comfortable. You look great.

You look like you're... The ghost of Chris Hardwick is taunting you. Fuck you. Oh, you can hear me? He's going to help you make some pottery later. There he goes.

This is why you gotta be here, folks. We have penetration. Mike Furman, name that movie. I warned you. Wait, can you give me the clues again? Sure, sure, sure. This movie is from 1989. Three stars from Leonard.

It's got either old or English in the title. And Leonard says about the movie, a lot of things intense, epic, has its share of flaws, rich atmosphere, superlative star performances. And your five names out

of nine are Pedro, I'm in... No idea who that is. Apologies to Pedro, I'm in Donandariz Jr. And I used to know how to say this lady's name. Tonyak? P-T-O-N-I-K? Tonyak?

Tonyak. Gabriela Roel. Jim Metzler. Jenny Gago. Those are your five names. That's it? Those are your five incredibly helpful names.

Wow. Jenny Gago. Freaky Mike Bang. Joanie Bang Bang. The English patient. Oh, that does have the word English in it. Thank you so much for being here, Mike Furman. Thank you very much for having me, Mike Benson.

The answer is Old Gringo. Old Gringo. Yes. Where Mike goes, I'm going too. Jane Fonda and Gregory Peck. And the ghost of Chris Hardwick is leaving as well. Let's hear it for Hard and Firm. Yay! Yay!

Hard and Firm, everybody. Hard and Firm. He threw his water bottle into the bag. Is there a shithead on the back of the puppet? No, okay, so we'll get one from you later, maybe. Time permitting. We'll see what happens. Thanks, guys. Can you write a shithead on the back of that for me? That'd be good.

Alright. Oh, no! Oh, he lost an eye! The puppet just jumped. His nose keeps falling off in his eye. After you lose to old Gringo, you have my permission to die.

All Bane, all night, everybody. Rockin' to the top of the hour. We're going to Kate McEuchie. Hi. Hi. Get to pick a category. And at some point very soon, I'm just going to go with the next category in line, because we will have heard all of them, and so we have to play them all.

Why not? Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Paul. Jimmy, take your seat. Paul, Jimmy, please. Please, Jimmy, Paul. Please.

Gentlemen. That's better. The at below zilch category. That's Doug loves guests. These are movies that some of you on this stage have participated in. Or... That lets him out.

At Jay Klumper suggested Harry Maguire, and that's movies where Tom Cruise has long hair. And Derek Seibel, S-E-I-B-E-L, suggested Mary Xmas, and that's movies that have the letter X in the title. I'd like to go with the long-haired Tom Cruise one. Okay. Would you like a long-haired Tom Cruise from 1994 or 1999?

99, please. Alright. Three stars from Leonard Maltin. I probably played this on the show before. A few times. It's been a long time and I don't keep track. But he says this movie

is emotionally exhausting and he says that... Is this movie Graham Elwood? It has... That movie was such a joy to make. I'll tell you some stories.

The movie has haunting songs in it, according to Leonard. In 1999, and Tom Cruise has long hair, and Leonard lists... 19 names in that ballpark? 19 names. 19. That's why I call Kate one of the better players. She knows what to do in that situation. 12.

Jimmy says 12, Bree. 11. Okay, Kevin. Fancy mic work. Two less than 12. Okay, Kevin. Fancy mic work. Two less than 12. I don't know why you keep insisting I do math, but... So we're down to... Now you have to bid.

Nine! Nine. As the enemy of your people would say. Uncomfortable. Uncomfortable for you to say that, I bet. Thank you for braving your way through it. Scott? I'm pretty sure I know it, but I'm going to go eight.

Okay. Seven. Graham? Graham? It's your turn to talk. Your turn. I'm Graham. It's your turn to talk. Your turn. I'm Graham. It's opposite day.

I'm Graham. It's opposite day. That's not how I speak. How many names? I said seven. Seven? Mm-hmm. Five.

Ooh. What's the category again? Toe Cruise. Toe Cruise has long hair. Toe Cruise has long hair. What year? 99. 99?

99. All right. What do you... Is this some Sam Levine play? No, this is... 99 99 alright is this some Sam Levine play that we're seeing I honestly zoned out for a bit and what did Leonard say about it he said it has haunting songs

and emotionally exhausting. Tom Cruise has long hair. Yeah. I can name that movie in zero names. This is where I'm at, Scott. I better think about what movie this is or I'm out. Let's say negative one. 99.

I'm going to call time on this. I'm going to need a second. Now, if it's not the 94 one, I feel like I know. 99 one. I don't know. And it has older English in it. Oh!

Ah, long hair, emotionally exhausted. This, oh, oh! I'm here emotionally exhausted Oh Can I ask a question that if someone answers it it's not my fault What year was Jerry Maguire? I know it's not Jerry Maguire but I'm trying to remember It's 96 and 98

It was released in 96 then they're like 1998 Let's put that Jerry Maguire out again People really responded to it. I will say negative one, because I'm out anyway, either way. That's an interesting approach. Sam? Negative one means you have to name the top billed person and the name of the movie.

Or you could say negative two. Yeah, and the movie, yeah. So Sam has could say negative two. And the movie, yeah. So Sam has to go negative two or more. This is incredibly frustrating to me. Really? You think you're alone in this? Jesus. Rooting for you.

I don't know that she doesn't. But she's so funny. I'm not sharing this thing. But she's so funny. You don't worry about Sam. He's doing great. He doesn't... He's not onto himself enough to be hurt. Aww. That's... That's so sweet. Did you know I'm kidding? Yeah, I knew you would.

What are you gonna do? What do you think you're gonna do, Sam, with two Ms? I'm sorry, Doug, you're the host. No, that was great. I was hoping you'd answer. I, uh... Oh, this is so frustrating. Why is it frustrating? Because I think

she knows what movie it is. Why would she say negative one if she doesn't have any idea? Well, I know I'm out if I say... He said zero. He knows what it is. So this is a survival... What did you do? Why did you say negative two? Sam, everyone knows the second name.

I think everyone here knows exactly what it is. I'm going to ask a question. I'm going gonna ask a question. I'm gonna ask a question, but I can't be held responsible if you just shout it out. What's the second name? No, don't do that, you. Oh, you guys want to help me rule out other fucking movies? My question, I wasn't sure what the rules were on it.

All right, I'll take sure what the rules were on it. I'll take a chance. Negative two. Name that movie. Oh, Kate. Poor Kate. Just stepped right in it. The film is, of course, Magnolia, starring our very own Paul F. Tompkins. Okay, well, that's wrong. No, you know what I'm saying.

You know what I'm saying, punk. Okay, the first name I'm going to hope is Tom Cruise, and the second one, this is my gamble, is John C. Reilly. It's Julianne Moore! Nice try, Lil' Wolverine! Let's hear it for him, everybody. Thank you. Sam Lev everybody. Thank you.

Sam Levine. Thank you very much. Let the podcast listeners know I'm receiving a standing ovation from four or five people. Four or five. Thank you. Remember, Sam's show is on TVS

Wednesdays, nine in the morning. Where is your... Where's your person you're playing for, Sam? Who'd you play for? I was playing for that snake in the room. Oh, there's the book.

Has it got a shithead on the back? There's no shithead on the back. The shithead's on the back cover? Oh, inside? Oh, you're going to make me go to work. Oh, okay. I thought you could get away with putting two names in there. Oh, thank you, sir.

Very nice. We got a name. Whoa. All right, sir. That's going to be fun to say. All right, Jimmy Pardo. Yes, sir. We start with you. And I'm just going to start giving out categories.

I look forward to it. This one's a fan favorite. It's called In Theaters Now. Okay. What's the premise behind that one? This motion picture is In Theaters Now. Okay. What's the premise behind that one? This motion picture is In Theaters Now. Oh, okay. And here's what Mr.

Malton had to say about it. He says... If we go... Too soon! It may be too soon. Literally. The direction, my only criticism is that the direction is so kinetic.

Yes. He did not care for the kinetic direction of this movie. He's saying a bit of repose wouldn't have hurt this film. That is a burn from Leonard Maltin! That's a good old fashioned throw down

and it's in theaters now, as I mentioned. How many stars? And he doesn't give a star rating at this early juncture. It's too early to star it? Yeah, he doesn't want to commit to anything. It's in theaters now. And he lists five names, Jimmy. It's in theaters as we speak.

Five names. I just came from the theater. And he says that thing about it. I'll go with the theater. And he says that thing about it. I'll go with the nickel. Too kinetic. You're taking all the names? I'll go five, yeah. Five spot, nickel.

Bree, what are you going to do? Here you go, Bree. What's Bree going to do? There's only five people in this whole movie. Well, they just listed five. Only five people that are important in this film? I guess in Leonard's eyes. It's in the theaters right now.

He just came from the theater. Yeah. He might have been at a screening of this movie. I'm going to give it a four. Okay. Kevin? The only criteria we have is that it's in theaters now and in his review.

There's no might be old or... Might be old? Might be old or... Might be old? Might be old or... You know one of those old movies that's in theaters now? It's just in theaters now. Yeah. And you said three?

Lots of theaters. It's not like at the New Beverly or something. It's a new movie. These gentlemen remain at loggerheads. There's 47 movies out right now, so I'm going to have to say name it. Oh, all right. So you get four names.

Yeah, you get four out of the five names, and I hope this will help you to solve the answer to the title of the movie. Or get it wrong. I mean, I'll be happy for either of you. Here we go. Jude Law. Isla Fisher.

Is that how you pronounce it? Huge Jackman. I'm sorry. Huge Yakman. Huge Jackman. And Alec Baldwin are your four names. Sarah knows it.

And it's out right this moment. Mm-hmm. It's been so great having you here. Got a guess? I'm not sure. What's the movie that's out right now I was hoping Alan Arkin

was going to be in it you remembered the name of that movie I just remembered one name what was that movie called that was called Stand Up Guys that's not it yeah that's my guess it's an animated

dealie and it's called Rise of the Guardians. Oh, those little guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So say goodbye to Brie Larson, everybody. Thank you so much for coming and for collecting your Hershey bars. Bye. Bye.

All right. Yeah, I think so. It starts with you. I'm going to go with the most names. All right, we got a pre-bid. He knows how to play the game, this one. Good me, Ali. All right, pre-bid.

Your category is... Celebrating a birthday today is not only a friend of the program, Leonard Maltin, but, yeah, it's here for Leonard. It's his birthday. He can listen to this a few days from now and think back about how we clapped for him on his birthday. And then so is Steven Spielberg celebrating a birthday as well. So the category, Josh, is... Is this entertainment tonight?

The category, Josh, is Spielberg movies. And this one is from 2002. And Leonard gives it three stars. And he says about the movie that it's brightly told and that it is based on a book. And he lists nine names. How many names? Josh. As I stated.

Oh, all nine names. I'm sorry. All nine. The pre-bid stands. I apologize. I'll go eight. Seven. Nicely played, Scott.

Six. Paul. Five. Four. Wow, we got some players. I totally zoned out. What was it? No, but what was the year?

2003 Spielberg. 2002. 2002 Spielberg. 2002 Spielberg. Based on a book. Based on a book. Based on a book. Brightly told.

Jimmy, sit down. Sit down, Jimmy. Come on. Shoot. Oh, dang it. I feel like I... He directed it, though? Or he produced it?

He wrote the book. Steven Spielberg movie. He had a cameo. You have three names? It's Blues Brothers. Four? Okay, three. So it's down to, say three or...

Three names. Tell Sarah to name it. Three names Three Jimmy is what Kate says to you We ran out of mic You guys are hogging them all Jimmy's thinking about it Kate said three names

The year is 2002 For many that would narrow it down considerably. Kevin Pollack's ordering breakfast, strangely in his own voice. In the sight of Ham. Hi. I got this one, Jimmy. Thank you, Kevin. I'm not 100% confident,

so Kate, I will say name that movie. All right. Three names? Three names. Your three names are... Jennifer Garner, Brian Howe and James Brolin Jimmy B indeed

yes Jimmy B 2002 brightly told Steven Spielberg three stars based on a book and it's called is it an animated movie?

You can't ask questions like that and the answer is no. Oh, shoot. I don't know this movie. It's called... Catch Me If You Can. Oh, right. She was the hooker.

Jennifer Garner was the hooker. That's right. It was brightly told. I love that movie. Oh, right. She was the hooker. Jennifer Garner was the hooker. That's right. It was brightly told. I love that book. It was fun. Kate McEuchie, everybody. Thank you, Kate. Can I have your name tag?

There we go. Is that it? That's Jimmy's mess. Here we go. That doesn't have a shit in on Here we go. Sorry, Ed. That doesn't have a shit head on the back either. Ed, if you could slip over here and write something on the back of that, that'd be awesome.

Behind me. Kate Micucci. Waving from behind the curtain. Okay. Start with you, Kevin. What happened? Jimmy was giving a thumbs up, and I gave him the Bill Clinton thumbs up. Oh, okay.

I thought it was... That story was brightly told. Wait till you read the book. Yeah. At Box Johnson, Box Johnson suggested eat, pray, gov. And that's movies with an actor

who became a governor. And this particular one is from 1996. And Leonard says about this movie that it deserves two stars. And he says... He says the lead actor gives it his best, and...

And it's nice that everyone showed up. And it's all up there. And he says that 88 minutes it feels prolonged. And he lists about 10 people. 10. Kevin says 10. Josh? 9.

Always. 8. You guys work that out? 7. 6. 5. Seven. Six. Five. What's happening? It's Sarah, right?

Watch your feet. Watch your feet. And I right now can't think of the title, and I think I know what it is. Do you know what it is? Of course I do. Well played. Do you?

What's up? I'll say four. What do you think of that, Jimmy? This is a two-star jobber. It deserves two stars, he says. Prolonged by 88 minutes, he says. 88 minutes. Shorter than this podcast.

Comes in just shy of an hour and a half. Ooh. What did you say, Sarah? I just thought it was such quick math. No, I meant what number did you say? I appreciate your comment on my rhetoric. Did I say four or five? You said four.

And I'm going to say name it! Oh, okay. I go home if you get it. I'm just trying to remember what the name is. I feel confident. Well, maybe these names will help you. No, I just can't remember. I think I know what it is. Okay, go ahead.

Jake Lloyd. Lorraine Newman, Harvey Korman, and Jimmy B. James Belushi, back again. Can't hold him down. The year, of course, is 96.

96. 96. Is that what it says? 96, yeah. 96. Remember the category, Sarah. Yeah. I'm assuming it's a Schwarzenegger movie and I feel like it's the one with

what's her face from what what I was thinking but maybe I'm wrong that it's the one with Vanessa Williams in it silence people of Gotham now I can just do it and they'll just think it's Graham

I mean unless it's a Ted Grandy... Nice pull. No, it's not Ted Grandy. Fred Grandy. Still a great pull. It's Ted Bundy and...

and Ted Lang. Okay. Maybe it's a Robert Reagan Ronald Reagan movie Uh no I don't want to prolong this I feel bad But if I'm

Is it the Vanessa Williams movie? No wait Vanessa Williams No you can't answer that't tell me. Wait. Vanessa Williams. No, you can't answer that. No, yeah. You can't answer it. She's not in it, and Sarah's not going to get it. So Sarah's out.

Boom. Yeah. Sadly. The motion picture's called Jingle All the Way. Jingle All the Way. Yeah, sort of already came up tonight. Django all the way. Yeah, let me see that.

Is it a good one? All right. All right. Sarah. Doug, for clarification, is it in fact jingle all the way? For clarification, is it in fact Jingle All the Vays? For clarification, we don't edit anything out.

So you're saying that stays in? Oh, yeah, that stays in. Okay. Who's up? I am. Oh, okay. Okay, good. It was your turn, so you're allowed to do that.

Oh, no. Chris Hardwick, everybody. Chris Hardwick. You're all right, Chris. Here we go, Chris. After handling many members of tonight's audience, Chris Hadrick has left the building. Father was a pro bowler.

All right, enough. Enough, Graham. Here we go, Kevin. At... I actually did think it was Graham at first. I was not even on the mic. That's bullshit At Chilson G-I-L-L-S-O-N-2 Suggested New Dad

As a category And New Dad is motion pictures Where the cinematographer Was Zooey Deschanel's father Caleb Deschanel Holy shit Scraping the barrel. I think everyone knows most of his work.

Sure. Yeah. You never worked with him. By that qualifier. Yeah. 2004 is the year. That's a Caleb. I'll try to give you some good clues.

Join. Yeah, he photographed this. Two and a half stars from Leonard. All right. Leonard calls this movie a chronicle. Interesting. And he also says... So it takes place over various times.

I'm going to guess. Hmm? Chronicle? And... Also a San Francisco newspaper. Okay, and he also says... Wheat toast, no butter. That this movie... This movie preaches solely to the choir.

This movie preaches solely to the choir. And it's a chronicle from 2004. Two and a half stars. And cinematographer is the great Caleb Deschanel. And there are eight names listed. Yes, eight. Nine. Gotta stick with what works.

Seven. Name it. Oh! Holy shit! A lady with hearts on her sweaters is walking out. People of Gotham, please! Take control. Take control of your podcast. People of Gotham, please!

Take control! Take control of your podcast, UCB! All right, here's your seven names. Let's send Scott Aukerman home. I'm going to try, Doug. Because it's more exciting right Scott okay Luca De Dominici

that's all I need what's in this but I need all the other names are we on one or two now? That's two names. Mattia Sabergia. Just skip to the one that I can recognize. Sergio Rubin.

Yeah. Maya Morgenstern. It's got a Jew in it. Claudia Garini. And this one, I know this lady, Monica Bellucci. Game changer. Yeah, from 2004, Monica Bellucci. And the category is...

And the cinematographer is, of course, Caleb Deschanel. Yes. You know, in the Bible, Caleb and Joshua were the two spies who told the truth about the land of Canaan. I don't know what the movie is. Monica Bellucci. Good night! Josh Valena! You sounded like you were ramping up

to say What? Passion of the Christ. Passion of the Christ. The Jew did not get Passion of the Christ. The Jew did not get Passion of the Christ? I lived it. Josh Molina, everybody.

Thank you, Josh. Merry holiday. All right, we can do this. I don't know that we can, Doug. Ooh-wee. All right, we can do this. I don't know that we can, Doug. Ooh-wee. All right. Where are we at in the lineup? Ricky?

That was the what's up with that sketch? I fucking love that sketch. Love it. All right, Ricky. Okay. At LLZ call Zioly Kofor. These right, Ricky. Okay. At LLZ call Zoli Kofor. These names are ridiculous. Is that someone that's in one of the movies?

Yeah. Suggested, A Holly Jolie Christmas. Okay. So these are the films of Holly Hunter or Angelina Jolie. All right. A Holly Jolie Christmas. And Leonard gives this movie two stars. What year is it?

It's from 1998. And he calls this movie A Stream of Consciousness Reminiscence. And he also says it's based on an acclaimed collection of short stories. And it's got either Holly Hunter or Angelina Jolie in it. In 1998.

Leonard names a total of eight names. What year again, sir? I'll do eight names. 1998. Eight. 98. Eight names. 98.

I will go seven. Paul... I will go six. Jimmy. Five. Silent five. Yeah, you just did. Kevin.

I need to be that prick that asks for all the information again. But as Christopher Walken. Okay. That's it. That's the one question. He does Christopher Walken. Okay. That's it? That's the one question? He does Christopher Walken not talking,

just sitting there. He nails it. Doug, I need to cook chicken and pears tonight for everyone. So, what year? It's based on

an acclaimed collection of short stories. Short stories. 1998. Who said they were acclaimed? I don't... I'm just saying that that's... All right.

What Leonard wrote. 2000... What is it? 98. 2098. 2098. The year of our Lord. Go on.

Jimmy says five Right Jimmy said four No, he said five He said five He did Yeah That's exciting Itali or Jolie?

If I say four You have to say three Or name it Think it through Say 98 I've got three minutes To finish this whole thing I'll name it Think it through Say 98 I've got three minutes to finish this whole thing We'll nail it

I'm gonna say four Alright Name it We call Scott the thinker We call Scott the thinker Your four names, Kevin, are Dennis Hopper, Holly Hunter Greg German, and Will Patton

from 1998 I like Will Patton. I like all those actors Some good actors One of them's no longer with us Poor Holly I like all those actors. Some good actors. One of them's no longer with us. Poor Holly. Dennis Hopper, Holly, Will. Marshall.

If I'd said, name it. Oh, yeah, let's go back and run that. Let's run those numbers. If I'd said, name it with eight names. Anyone? Yeah, 1998, I don't think I have a chance in hell based on short stories. If I said name it with eight names, anyone? Yeah. 1998, I don't think I have a chance in hell based on short stories. All right. That's fair.

But you've been very competitive. Kevin Pollak playing for Kevin in the audience. The movie also featured Jack Black, Dennis Leary, Samantha Morton, Billy Crudup, and it was called Jesus' Son. Jesus' Son. Oh, wow. Yeah, it's a good movie.

Thanks, Kevin. Kevin Pollack. Kevin Pollack. Nice job, Luke. Kevin's shithead, of course, is the one that sent Brie Larson into Giggle Fitz, so hopefully that'll be a good one to say at the end of the show.

Where are we going? Who's got it? Ricky's got it. She always knows where it's at. Ricky's got it! Ricky's got it! Yeah. Here's your category, Ricky.

It's Love Actually, and these are movies where actors in the movie are married in real life. In Love Actually. Were they married at the time of the filming? are married in real life? I love... Actually. Were they married at the time of the filming? You know what? Let's just skip it. This category is called...

This is called at Sue French suggested. Sue spelled T-S-U-E, French, stocking, I know, right? Can't even have a pen handy to listen to this. For a second, I was so excited, somebody had a normal name. No, stocking stuffers. Sorry, Paul F.

Oh. I think that, I hope that was not an audience member. Yeah. Whoa, whoa. Claws in, Kat. I hope that was not an audience member. Claws in, Kat. I think that was Vanellope von Schweetz. Okay, Graham Elwood, either way. Stocking stuffers. These are movies... Angry about it.

These are movies where a man puts on... Women's clothes. Women's... Well, pantyhose. Pantyhose. Okay. And eats stuffing. Okay.

On his legs or on any part of his body? He puts them on for some reason. You're right. You could be on to the whole robbery genre. Yes. All right. You could be on to the whole robbery genre. Alright. Ricky, three stars from Leonard for this

entertaining movie that lacks, only lacks, a solid punchline. If only this movie had a solid punchline. What's the year? 2000. And Leonard lists ten names. How many names do you think you get in?

She's got ideas. Ah, the title's on the tip of my tongue. I'll say ten names. Ten names. Good way to just get rid of it. Pass it down to Graham. Eight. Name. Okay, I heard you.

I say again. Eight names. Yeah, yeah. It's fewer names than expected. I'm going to say seven names. Here we go. Jimmy. I actually told the valet

don't move my car, I'll be out of here in a minute I never do very well at these I do okay when it's the three team the three people, but this group thing I get out early I'm liking this one tonight so I stuck around. It was my choice to stay.

I've never been more comfortable yet uncomfortable in my life the way I'm sitting. Give me the year again, please. Huh? Give me the year again, please. 2000. Turn of the century. Or millennium. We can call it millennium. You can't shake your head, please. 2000. Turn of the century. Or millennium. We can call it millennium.

You can't shake your head, Aukerman. You are not allowed to shake your head. All right, so you said seven? Yeah. I'll go half a dozen. We're going to happen to do it. Six. Half a dozen, Scotty A.

Name it. You got it. Half a dozen. Give me all the details again. The details are... Ballet, get the car ready. It's an entertaining but yet three-star movie because it could have...

It lacks a solid punchline. I disagree. And you get five of these beauties? Six. Six. Six names, and they are Delta Burke, Valerie Perrine, Judy Greer, Alan Alda,

Ashley Johnson, and Lauren Holly. Is it the final episode of MASH? Yes, of course. Lauren Holly was in the final episode of MASH. Paul is filming this?

I... Or just taking a picture? Will once again ask what is the category? Stocking stuffers. Stocking stuffers. Men in pantyhose. Just a...

Dumb and dumber-er? It's fair. It's fair. It's reasonable. Off by a few years, I bet. Yeah. The rest of the names are Mark Feuerstein, Marissa Tomei,

Helen Hunt. What Women Want. Mel Gibson. Yeah. What Women Want. What Women Want. Thank you, Jimmy Pardo. Shoot her!

Shoot her! Good job Jimmy Pardcast.com Ladies and gentlemen Right here Smile train Finally Paul F. Tompkins Can relax

Now that that's... All right, who's up? It's back to me again. I did know that movie, though. Yeah, you said it. Before I said Mel Gibson. It was impressive. I thought it was The Sessions. Yeah.

All right. But yeah, Mel Gibson puts on pantyhose in that movie and stumbles around. It did need a punchline. Paul's okay? Yes. All right need a punchline. Paul's okay? Yes. Alright. Let's play. Ricky, let's do Iceman Cometh. Val Kilmer

has sex. Oh, we did that one already. Let's do... Let's skip to one we haven't done. How about that? Peace on Earth. This is a toupee movie. Not a movie about toupees, but there's somebody in the movie that has a toupee. Okay.

And now that half of the panelists are extremely comfortable. Extremely. Yeah, you could probably sleep there. Pardon me if I doze off and dream of being on a cloud. Ricky? Yeah.

Three and a half stars from Leonard. Shocking bit of starsmanship on his part, if you ask me. of being on a cloud. Ricky? Yeah. Three and a half stars from Leonard. Shocking bit of starsmanship on his part if you ask me. I'd go a little higher. He also says about the movie that it goes on for too long and

you know, one of my favorite clues based on a book. What year? And the year is 1990. And Leonard lists 19 names. Oh, 19 names.

This is going to be fun. Yeah, 19. Graham? 19. she said 19 okay and this is this is someone wears a toupee give me all the things again

toupee three and a half stars too long based on a book year 1990 1990 19 names

15 names I just blew your minds yeah consistency really 1990, 19 names. 15 names. I just blew your minds. Yeah, consistency really knocks us on our ass. Zero names. Ha ha ha! Scotty, what do you do with that piece of business? I know one movie based on a book that came out in 1990.

And I know I could guess it, but what did he say about the movie again? Too Long. Too Long? Based on a book. Just Too Long and based on a book?

Uh-huh. And someone with a toupee? His entire review. Toupee, book, long. In Leonard's defense, he doesn't bring up the toupee. How crude are you saying that? Out of respect. I mean, the one I'm thinking of has an actor who wears a toupee in it.

And it had a lot of people in the movie. Sure. But I just don't think it's it. I know what you're thinking it is. Do you really? I think so. So what's it going to be? Negative one or negative?

Side game for later. Yeah. Fuck. But what are you gonna do right now To Paul F. Tompkins Zero names Hold on Let me just make sure

That's a 90 movie 90 90 90 90 I think it's 90 Go by 90 Yeah it's 90 Say it Or I mean Bid

Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid

Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid

Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid

Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid

Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid

Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid Bid I'll go negative one Negative one he says Ricky Name it

What is it Wild at Heart And who's the top billed actor Both of those are wrong Is the movie Goodfellas That is correct Goodfellas It has been my pleasure to play the game

with you tonight. Scott Aukerman. Lovely. Good job. What's your name tag, Scott? Did you leave it? I moved it in. Oh.

Okay. All right. No? Okay. I don't know about you guys, but I think this is terribly exciting. I meant, I think this is terrible, and everyone's exiting.

Two words. What categories haven't we done, and where are we starting now? Graham. Graham refuses to move. Lucky spot. He's going to stay right... Yeah, you're like De Niro in Silver Linings.

Playbook. Okay, Graham, would you like to do... Did we do Tinseltown already? Did we do that? No, we haven't done that one. Okay, let's do Tinseltown. Would you like a Tinseltown already? Did we do that? No. No, we haven't done that one. Okay, let's do Tinseltown. Would you like a Tinseltown, L.A.-based movie from 96 or 2006? 96.

Okay. Two stars from Leonard. He says about this movie that it is tongue-in-cheek, but devoid of wit. in cheek but devoid of wit mm-hmm and yeah that's about all you need to know I think and LA and thirteen names seven Seven. Okay. Paul? 96.

Two stars. Set in L.A. Tongue-in-cheek, devoid of wit. I'll go six. Name it. All right. I'm going to try to. I just don't want to. I don't know what it is.

All right. One of these I can already tell I'm not going to try to. I just don't want to. I don't know what it is. All right. One of these I can already tell I'm not going to pronounce right, but I can't wait. It'll be worth it, whatever happens to here. Paul Bartel. I know how to say that. Right. Bruce Campbell. Sure.

Easy enough. Absolutely. Robert Carradine. Mm-hmm. Said that right. Mm-hmm. Pam Greer. Mm-hmm. Said that right. Mm-hmm. Pam Greer. Mm-hmm.

Nailage. And then the next one is Georges or George. Coriface or Coriface. He played Columbus in some Columbus movie. Sure, okay. And then your sixth name, you got six names, right? Yes. Is A.J. Langer in the Columbus movie. Sure, okay. And then your sixth name, you got six names, right? Yes. Is A.J. Langer.

And the year is 1996. Really would like to see a Ricky and Paul finish here. Not gonna happen. That dream is not gonna happen. 1996 in L.A. Not gonna happen That dream is not gonna happen 96.7 LA No, I don't have it Devoid of wit Can I take a guess?

Please No How about get shorty? No No, and here's an interesting rule. When you guess out of turn, you're eliminated. So Paul gets to stay. No fucking way.

Bullshit. Suck it. I ain't going anywhere. Guess out of turn and be wrong. Did you see when he said Goodfellas? He was right. No. It was Escape from L.A.

The John Carpenter Why is Leonard even giving people a guide to that movie? Yeah, two stars is kind of generous but thank you very much Paul F. Tompkins Thank you sir Does this have a shithead on it? Did you put a shithead on here, hat person?

Back of the paper. Well done. Now there's two. Okay. You guys did it. Let's hear it for Ricky and Graham. The fans, you're the real winners. Standing.

There's massive amounts of punishment from all sides there was a lot of good players some dead weight but you know sometimes dead weight can do good in this game so i'm going to let you guys finish on a uh let me find you a really fun category that we can end with that deserves to be the last thing we play from a gentleman known as Asparagus P this is full review this is where, who's going first?

Graham's going first. I'm going to read the entire review, and then from there, you tell me how many names it'll take you. But you will know the name at that point of the movie, theoretically. So then, gets into negative names. Uh-oh.

Out the gate. Ricky, I cannot live with him winning two years in a row. I will never hear the goddamn end of it. You're already going to hear finalists two years in a row, bitch. He'll leave the turn signal on for 20 minutes while he tells me about his two... Oh, safe driving, Doug. Three stars from Leonard for this movie from 1987

about an undercover cop who's a borderline psychopath who's always on the edge and is partnered with a stable family man and they prove a good team as they go after a particularly scummy drug ring loud violent trashy cop movie done to a turn fast paced and entertaining so long as you don't think about it too much director Director's cut runs 117 minutes. Thanks, Len! Followed by three sequels. And then they list, Leonard lists seven names.

What year is it? And the year is 1987. Graham, how many names do you think you can get it in? 1987. It's got one cop and another cop. Titanic. And the guess in the audience is Titanic. And of course, you have to leave now.

Guy who said Titanic. I will go negative two. Shoot, I could have done two. I don't know three. I've never seen this movie. I know what it is. No! Is there a lady in it?

I can't believe this is happening to me. Oh my God. Oh my God. I know the other one. Oh no, he's doing... Oh my God. know the other one Oh no He's doing Oh my god He's doing some

There's gotta be like a lady right Or a boss Or a sidekick Did some dips Now he's doing some yoga Wasn't Joe Pesci in one of them Namaste Is that him

The great Jim Pesci Name it Name it. Name it, Graham. Here we go, Graham. Is it Lethal Weapon? And is it Mel Gibson and Danny Glover? Yes.

Who was the third? The third was Gary Busey. Never would have gotten it congratulations hey has anyone else won in two years in a row no fucking way you sons of bitches you know what anyone who says they're good at this game tell them to talk to the hand

come on now take control take control you see me I am the 12 guests of Christmas reckoning control. Take control, UCB. I am the 12 guests of Christmas Reckoning. I will control

this game. And then I will kill Doug Benson. What's the name of the show? It's one of my nieces' name. Grace. Grace. Alright, Grace. Come get your prizes, Grace. Grace. Come in there.

There's a lot of great stuff in there, Grace. And some other stuff. Congratulations. Yeah, take both bags. You did it. And one more time for Graham Elwood, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you guys so much! I will sit in that chair next year, and I will win a third time.

Now eat my fucking gum for free. Hey Graham, you know how lately there's been a problem you haven't been getting my texts? That problem's going to keep happening. It's really been happening. Like, every time I text him, he doesn't get it.

And we're like, we don't know what the problem is. Other than, you know, maybe it's how it should be. But anyway, congratulations to Graham. And thank you guys for coming and sitting through the epicness.

Two hours and 48 minutes. Write to us, all of us on Twitter, and let us know that you listened to all of this and that you heard all these shitheads at the end. I will go through all the ones that I have here. There's people yelling backstage. It's been quite a night. I'm going to read the one that Bree laughed at. I'm going to read that one last, and hopefully it been quite a night i'm gonna read the one that brie laughed at i'm gonna

read that one last and hopefully it'll be a big finish all right as always liz and dick is the shithead and then this one says don't read out loud oh for them i thought you meant for me chris brown is the shithead i'm gonna get in trouble for that one chad plumber is a shithead. I'm going to get in trouble for that one. Chad Plummer is a shithead. Mason Crosby is a shithead. M. Night Shyamalan is a shithead. Nigerian princes are a shithead. He made me say it. Let's see.

The Gun Lobby's a shithead. And this one's written inside the book. She's making me... What? Where is it? Oh, in the back, yeah. Michael Bay and Mark Sanchez is a shithead. And Michelle Williams is a shithead. Not the actress, not the Destiny's Child.

My wife! I think I wrote all of that on there. What is Ryan's shithead. Not the actress. Not the Destiny's Child. My wife! I think I wrote all of that on there. What is Ryan's shithead? Fred Claus is a shithead. Miami Connection doesn't have a shithead, but I'll say... What? The hat is a shithead?

Where'd the thing from the hat go? I did it already. What? Wonka? What? Jesus. It's sort of worth it. 3D conversions are a shithead. Okay, is that all of them?

Oh, the puppet. Yeah, what's yours? The Westboro Baptist Church is a shithead. Yeah. And finally... What? Who said no? Oh, I thought you said no.

Like you knew somebody else that had a shithead. This looks like 13 shitheads laying before me. So finally, and thanks again for coming and listening, and parades in L.A. are a shithead. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you because Doug loves movies.