Doug Loves Movies - Big Jay Oakerson, Mark Normand, Trey Galyon and Rob Cantrell guest

Episode Date: March 4, 2016

Live from the Gramercy Theatre in NYC, Doug welcomes Big Jay Oakerson, Mark Normand, Trey Galyon and Rob Cantrell to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds With 50 azipop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Because Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is I Love Movies. Coming to you once again from one of my favorite towns and venues, the Gramercy Theater in New York City.

Yay. Yay. Yay! It's Thursday, March 3rd, 2016. Let me NYC your name tags. There is a knitted BB-8 up front that I've already seen on the internet. I hope it gets picked because that is a good one. And then

we got Lily Madison. Balcony people, just go ahead and put them down. I'm not going to be able to tell what's on your side. But my guests might go out that far so you still have a chance. You never know. But I could see Lily Madison instead of...

What was his name? Willie Madison? Saladin? Your name's Sal? Sal? Sorry. Better Cal Sal. And then, who's that next to you? What's your sign say?

Al-Ladin for Allison. Al-Ladin for Allison? You guys both have Aladdin posters? All right, good luck. Maybe only one of you will be chosen. What's that Star Wars Death Star thing? The Brian Strikes Back? He's just, yeah.

That's what it says. The Brian Strikes Back. We got a reader on our hands. What's the Jumanji? What's that one? Jen Manji? I like it. Strange's that one? Jen Manji. I like it. Strange Jonathan Fiction.

Instead of Stranger Than Fiction. Strange Jonathan Fiction. I like that. Straight Outta Carlton. Very nice job. It's tough when your name is out of. Thank God that movie came along. Everybody did a great show. Oh, there's a Goon out. Thank God that movie came along.

Everybody did a great show. Oh, there's a Goonies one. Alright, put them down and you know when to raise them up later in the show. None of my guests have seen any of them yet because they're all backstage. Doug's Plugs! This Saturday, I'll be participating in Jimmy Pardo's

podcast-a-thon. Yeah, watch it at NeverNotFunny.com and bid on eBay auctions to appear on this podcast. So, like, if one of you guys in New York was the highest bidder, you would be sitting up on this stage. I should go ahead and tell you now, all four seats tonight are going to be occupied by auction winners.

Everybody's like, no. Why did you? The guests are usually... No, but one person on a show will get to be the winner of that particular auction. And as of the last time I checked, Douglas Movies was going for

$1,250 or something like that. Yeah, it's pricey. But it's for a good cause. Smile Train, which is the third installment of Denzel Washington's Train trilogy. He did Unstoppable, Taking a Pill in 1, 2, 3,

and his next one is called Smile Train. It's the happiest Denzel Washington movie, this side of that Christmas one he did. Preacher's Wife. Damn it, it would have been such a funny thing to say if I'd have thought of it when I needed it. if I'd have thought of it when I needed it. And getting Doug with High to be on that show is currently at...

We won't come to New York, though. Not yet, anyway. But that's up to like $840, I think. I think it's 420 times 2. Sunday, Doug Lowe's movies returns to the Nerd Melt showroom at Meltdown Comics in Los Angeles. Come have a good afternoon sweat sesh with me and my guests.

Monday night, I'm going to be on the March Madness bracket-style tournament of champions at midnight on Comedy Central. So look for me on that and root for me from your homes, which doesn't help at all. And I'm excited to announce that Doug Lowe's movies will return to right here, the Gramercy Theater, on Monday, April 25th at 8 p.m. And anyone at this show now

gets the first shot at buying tickets at the box office right here. Sans ticketing fees. Because you're buying it from the theater in person. So congrats on that.

It's going to be $15 instead of $19. And some of you will look at the size of the line and go, fuck it, I'll pay the $4. So everyone else that wants tickets to that one, go to the link over at douglosmovies.com. Now it's time for Tweet Relief, tweets about movies. Frequent Douglas Movies guest Ken Jennings tweeted, I turn off the Little Mermaid when the crab starts in on how bad the human world is because I'm a human and that is some hateful shit right there.

This has been a Tweet Rel relief, only human edition. Let's look inside the prize bag next to my Tito's and soda. Every once in a while, somebody writes to me. I guess they're from other countries, or I don't know what their deal is. But they write to me and they go, you drink Tito's vodka with coke or with soda and i'm like no soda water tito's and soda means soda water and they're always like oh thanks for the information i'm like okay i'm glad you're not a bartender

although i have had that mix up with bartenders every once in a while. Look at this, you guys. Pair of the most beautiful, luxurious, like they're so soft, hippie socks that I will never wear. A little kit they give you at United when you're in first class and you might have to clean up some of your shit or wear an eye mask. I think there's an eye mask.

Is that what they're called? Sleep mask? Oh my God. I got some cookies when I was on At Midnight a couple weeks ago, and they got so smushed in my luggage. But here they are anyway. They're individually wrapped, at least,

from D. Luscious. And then from my collection of things I don't want anymore, the Robert Palmer CD, Heavy Nova. Featuring the smash hit single, Simply Irresistible. And I'll find another one. No, that was it. And, oh, another CD of Nelly Furtado.

Oh, wait, there's more. One of these things that I got from a dude down in Florida where you can put your lighter in here and it grips onto it real good, and then you clasp this carabiner-type deal on your belt, and then you always got your lighter.

Like if you're in a smoke circle. It's always coming back to you. Or it could hit you in the dick, though. And it says 420 certified on it, so it's good when things are official. Deadpool, what do you call it? Coaster.

A button a dude gave me that's really cool. It's a Simpsons button where it's... Remember when Homer was in that... What do you call it? Remember when he was in a barbershop quartet and they were called the B-sharps? This button says, meet the B-sharps, and it's a parody of the Meet the Beatles album cover

on a button. I almost didn't put this in the bag because I like it so much. And finally, some VHS's from my collection from all the way across. These flew all the way out here. Two episodes of Dawson's Creek.

Yeah. The pilot Yeah. The pilot. Yeah. Where Michelle Williams walked into our lives when she steps out of a cab and the music's like That song, remember that one? And then... Episode 108.

So you're going to jump forward eight episodes in the Dawson's Creed saga and land on one called In the Company of Men. Because a lot of the episodes were named after movies, even sort of obscure ones. So all of that is going in the prize bag. Plus what is brought by my guests. I'm going to put the cookies in the very bottom so that they get even more smashed up. My guests also brought something for their prize bag. Please give a big warm welcome to four very funny dudes.

Trey Gallion, Rob Cantrell, Mark Norman, and Big Jay Oakerson. Yeah. You're going to sit next to me, dude? What are you doing? Is that bad? I think game-wise, that's bad for me. Come on. You think it's bad to sit next to him? Why?

Yeah, I don't know, man. I make you look thin. And you're wearing corduroys? Come on. Yeah, dude. Rocking it. You're killing it here. Well, regardless, Trey, you've already won one award.

You won one game, and you're the winner of the Pete Holmes game. Oh, right. You're the first person to speak without being spoken to. Congratulations on that. Thank you. And let's give him another round of applause. Trey Gallion is here, right. She's the first person to speak without being spoken to. Congratulations on that. Thank you. And let's give them another round of applause. Trey Gallion is here, everybody. Hey, what's up, you guys? Howdy, howdy,

howdy. New York comedy, EDN, here from Austin, is where we met. Yep. And you're doing great here. You're from Austin, is where we met. Yep. And you're doing great here. You're really doing the New York comedy thing. I'm having a fun time with it, man.

What do you have for the prize bag situation tonight? All right. I've got a copy of my CD, The Moronic, available on Rooftop Records. It's a great cover. Thanks, man. Everybody see that? Yeah. No one's old enough to get the reference, I guess.

Yeah, that's it. The material inside is shit. But the disc is cool, too, because it's got a picture of a joint. And then a copy of Andy Ritchie's CD, King Ding-a-ling. Oh, Andy Ritchie! Who passed away recently, but very funny dude. South by Southwest has his album online. You can download

it for free on there, too, if you want. So do that. Yeah, and I didn't know Andy, but a lot of comedians are very good friends with him, and some of them are carrying them with them to this day. I'm glad you didn't accidentally put it in the prize bag, but Trey has like a little vial of some of Andy's ashes.

Andy Ritchie is here with us this evening, everybody. That's Andy Ritchie right there. Just fucking creeped everybody out. Yeah, the crowd didn't laugh at all. They just gashed. No, they're just like, what? Oh, Christ, that's so real. No, it's gross.

Ground up bones in your... That vial is hilarious. Yeah. I thought it would get the show off to a fun start if I mentioned you have part of a dead guy in your front pocket. It's pretty sweet. What's in the bag?

So I collect barf bags, and Delta's is currently my favorite right now because it's got a little I'll be back. You can put it on the seat when you go to the potty. And then it says, feel better. Use bag. As you're vomiting, that's the perfect thing to read. Right?

It's great. And then it's got the handy tape on it, too. Most of them don't have the tape. They got the stupid metal flap, which isn't going to hold puke at all. But what's all this stuff that's inside it? Then I put some more stuff inside. It's another dead friend. Oh, it's a...

No, we're good. But it is an Entenmann's Devil's Food donut. What? Yeah. It's in a plastic bag like it's some sort of contraband. Well, because it was like in the box of eight. You know how they come. I thought that was a...

I thought you packed snacks like a grandmother. Oh! Wow. It's going to get torn apart like when Ozzy threw a chicken in the audience. Yeah. I thought that was a dead black comic. Already, Mark? Jeez, dude.

Sorry. It's so early in the show. Yeah, get through the prizes first. Diversity. And then I drew a little sticker on a yellow sticker, and it's my name with a toilet on it. So I drew that and then a pen from the show house that i swiped from uh one of the offices somewhere i was for an audition like fox and a

shower cap and um some uh bearing oil for your skateboard bearings sick i was really just grabbing shit at that point yeah you were i mean you know i appreciate it's a yeah the variety of something for everyone just don't even i've lost all energy for getting the other prizes from the other guests really that was too much that was it was exhausting sorry and you know you didn't even give us a pinch of the dead guy. You're going to keep it all to yourself? Well, yeah. Not cool, man. All right. Big Jay Oakerson is here, everybody.

Good to be back. Host of 15 things. 15 things. 17 things. You've got so many shows and projects going on. Just three. What's, okay. So, sex, drugs, and rock and roll.

Yes. SDR show. SDR show is one of them. Legion of skanks. Legion of skanks. And me and Dan Sutter have a radio show on Comedy Central Radio called The Bonfire. Bonfire. I kept calling it The Boneyard the other day.

That's a channel. I was so close and so wrong. That's actually a channel on Sirius. Yeah, there you go. The Bonfire. Bonfire, yeah. And that's on, but that's on satellite. Yep, Sirius XM, Comedy Central, 95.

Awesome. And what do you have besides a half-finished Pabst can? Well, besides that, which I will give if people want, I brought along, I thought this was kind of cool. I have Dr. Emmett Brown pop movie art. That's pretty neat if you care about that stuff. Yeah. And if you want to care about that stuff, I got you two little bottles of fucking vodka.

So, yeah. I have a very functional gift. Yeah. No, that's two sweet little bottles of Tito's vodka. No, Kenna won. I said Tito's two sweet little bottles of Tito's vodka. No, Kettle One. I said Tito's. Oh, I mean Tito's. Can you help me with my sponsor?

My apologies. No, Kettle One is my... I just wanted to see how gross it is when you go back to Tito's. Kettle One's my backup when they don't have Tito's, but it's happening less and less. Thanks for bringing all that stuff, man. Absolutely, absolutely. Appreciate it. No dead guy? No dead guy. All my friends all that stuff, man. Absolutely. Appreciate it. No dead guy?

No dead guy. All my friends are living and not in my pocket. Also here this evening, guest three out of four, it's Rob Cantrell. Hello. Hello. New York City.

New York City. I don't have as much... Indeed. What's that? Huh? I was going to say, I don't have as much as Big J going on. I've just been going to get coffee a lot. That's how you get three shows.

Yeah. I got to drink five cups of coffee. Yeah, exactly. I got to take and drink more coffee. You're going to have the energy for it when they come along. Yeah. I got to drink five cups of coffee. Yeah. I got to take it and drink more coffee. You're going to have the energy for it when they come along. Yeah.

What do you have for the prize bag, buddy? But I do have a show coming up at Union Hall on March 21st that I wanted to plug. That's not what I asked you. I know.

I went off course. I apologize. For the gift bag, I have a banana cream pie. What? Yeah. It's a little miniature pie. Throw it.

Throw it. Throw it. Oh, yeah. Maybe I should throw it. Yeah, I think you should throw it. Wait, you're opening it out of the box? No, leave it in the box. Leave it in the box.

No, out of the box. Out of the box. Out of the box. Oh, no. Oh, no. Send it. Send it. Oh, it fell out of the box, out of the box, out of the box. I want to see people. Oh, no. Oh, no. Sad, yeah. Sad, yeah. Oh, it fell out of the tin.

The tin fell off of it. In midair, it was perfect. Oh, man. That's a comedy throw right there. We're throwing pies. We're taking it back to the old school. I'm going to spray you with seltzer water real soon. You're like a Jewish Gallagher.

Are you Jewish? Izer water real soon. You're like a Jewish Gallagher. Are you Jewish? I can't remember. I was going to smash it, but we threw it. We threw it. But I'm not... The shower cap. The pen.

The Tito's. The piece of Andy Ritchie. If you want, I'll throw a little bit of him in there. No, we don't want you to put your dead friend in there. Just lay out one Hollywood rail of him and we'll all take turns on it. I want to freeze it. Already did that. That's such a bummer, but I also have a rap CD I'm plugging.

Sad, sad story about Andy. My rap CD is out. Really bummed about Andy. It's huge. Love that dude. Good dude with seven hot hip-hop tracks. I'd rather the ashes. On Spotify, on Rhapsody.

There's one song about coffee and weed, but R.I.P. Andy Ritchie. There's a rhyme right there. Andy Ritchie did a rap CD called Bum Rush that's all poop raps. That sounds better than mine. You think you're better than Andy Ritchie rock and roll? No, no. That dude has doo-doo rhymes.

Get Rob's first. He's got doo-doo rhymes. When you said on Spotify, on Rhapsody, I thought there were two new reindeer in the classic song about reindeer. What else you got for the bag? Santa Claus is Coming to Town.

And my last is a book. Don't throw that at the audience. It's kind of heavy. Reefer Movie Madness. This is the ultimate stoner film guide by my friend and your friend Steve Bloom. And I wrote a review about Conan the

Barbarian in here. And how he trips acid and punches a camel in that one scene. Or he drinks some formula. It's really wild. But Conan, it's a good film. We'll pass all that

stuff down here. Thank you for bringing it. She has the pie out there. Yeah. Well, thanks for throwing the pie. And I should have introduced him first because, you know, to be polite, it's his first time on the show, everybody. Let's hear it for Mark Normand.

Hey, hey. Thank you. Thanks for having me. Good to be here. Yeah, it's awesome that you're doing the show. Yeah, I listened to a few. They're funny. Thanks.

Whew, we passed the test. Yeah, good show. Yeah, and what are you, this is your first time, so I'm interested to know what you brought for the bag. Sure, I brought a signed picture of Donald Trump. No, no, I, this is a, oh boy. I think some people in the audience are disappointed you didn't really bring that. No, it's a straight out of Compton Blu-ray, unopened, still in the box. And I brought a, oh boy, refill revolution cup, which I'm using, from Bonnaroo.

It's an artist cup you can put on your hip, and you don't have to use a plastic cup, even though I have one inside of it, which I guess defeats the whole thing. But, yeah, it's kind of fun at a party. So you're going to need to hang on to that because you're using it. Well, I can do one of these. Oh, okay. It's like a cup holder right now.

Yeah, pull the cup out and then pass down the one that's going in the prize bag. I've never seen a cup with a carabiner on the side. But wouldn't the water leak out? Yeah, it doesn't have a lid. I think it's to carry around to refill and drink right away. There's no lid. It looks slightly used.

Yeah, I'd wash it. Give it a wash. This crowd hates tech talk. How do you work this crazy crap? Straight Outta Compton was great. I loved Straight Outta Compton. It wasn't as good as Disorderly's, but it was good. You love the fat boys.

For real, man. But it was pretty good. Yeah, the help was good, too. Too soon, bud. Are you like white guy? That's like white guy in a break room doesn't know what to say. I've never seen it, but, you know. Just bring up the help.

That's something we could talk about. That Stacey Dash is a cunt. All right. Right. These are all break room things. That'd be great if they did that on At Midnight, break room things, and you said that. That thing where she came out on the Oscars was just weird. I didn't get what the joke was.

They should have wrote more lines for her. Yes, or something. I don't know. That's what it was. Everyone was shocked that it was her, and then she just went right into the punchline. Said some weird thing and ran off. Yeah, so they should have wrote more stuff for her to say that could have went better yeah it could have but man most of that went went great i thought chris did a really good good job uh mark yeah motion pictures you see any lately yeah yeah what was like the last one that you eyeballed? I just re-watched

40-Year-Old Virgin was on TBS. And I watched that. Alright, we'll move on to the next person. If you're not going to take the question seriously. What? Partier? How much of it did you watch? I mean, don't they take a break for four minutes every five

minutes? Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, so it's rough to watch it that way. But that's one of those movies I agree that if I'm flipping around and it's on, I would stay with it for a while. Oh, yeah. Oh, I watched Hoosiers recently. Is that better? What? Yeah, I watched it on a plane.

What was that about? Basketball. Why Hoosiers on a plane? I fly so much I'd seen everything else. So I was like, ah, fuck it, we're going back around. Plus fucking Gene Hackman. Is it a classic? Yeah, no, Hackman's great and it's a really good movie, but people don't bring it up much these days. Yeah, it's fun.

And you enjoyed it? I liked it, yeah. I could tell you, I met the dudes that wrote and directed that movie. Ah. And they didn't care for Gene Hackman or Barbara Hershey. Really? Yeah, Dennis Hopper, sweetheart. Uh-huh.

Those other two that are still alive, assholes. Wait, Dennis Hopper's dead? Oh, yeah, he is. Oh, my God, I gotta get some ashes. Jesus. Oh my god, I gotta get some ashes Jesus I had no idea, really I did not know that You gotta check out my rap CD Alright, alright

It's mad dope Wow That's just really forcing that plug in there Rob, what was the last movie you saw? The Good Dinosaur Really? That's just really forcing that plug in there. Rob, what was the last movie you saw? The Good Dinosaur. Really? Yeah.

You took your kid? Yeah, I took my kid, my four-year-old daughter. And we went in there, and like 20 minutes in, my daughter turned to me and was like, this shit fucking sucks, yo. Wait a minute. Isn't that a rap group? Yeah, it is. It's a track on my rap a rap group? Yeah it is It's a track on my rap CD You can check it out

No way No I'm serious I'm thinking of Dinosaur Junior No That's a great band Dinosaur Junior Yeah But they're not rap

They're alternative 90s Not rap at all But the good dinosaur No she got scared And we got out of there It's like I looked down It was PG

And those movies Start sad as fuck, man. Like the good dinosaurs. Right, they kill off a mom right away, right? Yeah. Right. She was not going for that. We got the fuck out of there. Yeah, wait around for a little while.

Yeah. She's probably ready for Inside Out. Yeah. That's rough. I saw that guy guy though, Richard Kind that does the voice of that crazy, what's his name in the movie? Bing Bong?

That sounds like something I'd say because I don't know the name. I saw Richard Kind the other day. You know, Bing Bong or whatever from Inside Out. I saw Kung Fu Panda. That was really good.

Three, just recently. Yeah, you think they ended the trilogy on a good note, or is there... Oh, I can watch ten more. Oh, so do they leave it open at the end? More Kung Fu Panda. Is there a cliffhanger at the end? Do they leave it open for more?

That was really high. No, uh... It was good, it was good. I don't know. Yeah, he meets his father. It's deep, uh... It was good. It was good. I don't know. Yeah, he meets his father. It's deep, man. It's heavy.

Wow. Yeah, yeah. All right. Jay was... Nunchucks and shit. Okay. It's a hell of a review. We've already spent more time than anyone would ever want on The Good Dinosaur.

So let's ask Jay. What was the last movie you saw? I saw The Witch the other day, which was fucking horrible. Oh, the guy yelled, yeah! I know, I feel bad for that guy because he was wrong. It was ridiculous.

No, I mean, I think he went, yeah, because you said it was horrible. Yeah, it was one of the worst things I've ever seen. No, it's one of those movies where people rave about it, and I've ever seen. No, it's one of those movies where people rave about it, and I get why some people would like it. I couldn't guess why anyone liked that.

Well, because it's really well-realized. It really feels old-timey. All those people feel like real old assholes that used to be fucking that scared of witches. But I'm watching it going, I don't give a shit about some witch.

I don't care what this witch does. I want it to be over so bad. But that's not that interesting. What I have been watching lately, and I'm curious, we should get each other's numbers, Doug, so we can talk about shit, because I'm a movies guy for sure. And I've gone into the rabbit hole recently on some

real fucked up cinema. There is some real crazy shit out there. Have you ever seen the August Underground movies? I watched those recently. No. I don't think I ever will. You shouldn't. They're terrible. I mean, you're setting it up to be something I wouldn't want to see.

It's home movie footage, but it's a guy who's amazing at special effects, and they're just thrill-kill movies. It almost looks like snuff films, but I thought... Has anyone ever seen them before? August Underground? This fucking sick chick over here. Yeah, she's excited about it, too.

They're fucked up, right? They're just super, uber-violent, rapey, over-the-top, gutting people things. I don't know how long they are. I come pretty quick. No, they're... That was the wrong thing to say.

Just, if you get a chance to check them out online, they're wacky. There's something to see. Yeah, I'm not going to check that out. You should check it out. At all. You will let me know if you checked it out for sure. Trey, what do you say? I saw The Witch.

The Witch was bad. I got It Follows'd on that one Everybody loved It Follows It's the scariest thing you'll ever see I didn't hate It Follows I thought it was a fun movie to watch The Witch was horrible But then I saw Furious 7 and that made everything all better I did, yeah, that was great

I just wish It Follows sets up that it's like Sex makes it go from one person to another And it's a girl running around not having sex with anybody. Why didn't she just jump on a dick and get it over with? Right. Because some moral dilemma. I don't have time for your dumb moral dilemma. I'd like to see a movie where a bunch of people are being followed.

A bunch of sex scenes followed by chasing. Slowly. That was the other thing. It was a creeper. If everyone just grows up and fucks one after another constantly, that thing is going to be so far away, it doesn't matter who it's following. Oh, that's a good point, too. Dumb movie.

Stupid-ass movie. Yeah. You're right, now I hate it. Let's go beat up the people that made it. Can we do that? No. Oh. Because what we're going to do...

Huh? Is say, let the games begin! because what we're going to do is say let the games begin! Wow, look at that. Holy shit. They got their name tags up already. I don't like the BB-9. They know their cue.

Looks like a Bernie Sanders rally. Holy hell. Pick the name tag that you want to play for, and while you guys do that, we'll do this. We'll be right back. Hey, everybody. Do you love books but find that you never have time to read them?

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Audible.com is offering a free 30-day trial. Go to audible.com slash Doug today to start your free trial today. Again, show your support for Doug Loves Movies and get a free 30-day trial at audible.com slash Doug. Back to the show!

We're back! And it looks like two of my panelists have chosen donuts and the other two have chosen wisely, but let other two have chosen wisely. But let's go down the line. Let's start with Mark.

I can re-pick. No, no, no. It's fun when people pick donuts. Because the reason they brought the donuts is because now we're going to take those donuts and chuck them at audience members. I can't eat them? You can eat one. All right. Do you want to keep them all?

Nah, I don't want to ruin the game like some fatty. No, because we got another box down here. So we got plenty of donuts to throw. Why don't I pick again? I don't want to have two donuts. No, but you picked, honestly, you were like, I want a box of donuts. So what

what's the name on the box of donuts? Big Billy. Good old Big Billy. Yeah. And don't say the next thing at the bottom. We'll save that for the end. All right. All right. Well, who are you playing for, Rob? Is it?

Let's see here. Yeah. Is it Devin? Oh, yeah. Yeah, don't worry. Devin Psychopathus. And I'm on this. Instead of seven psychopaths, it's Devin Psychopaths.

Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah. So this is Devin Ritchie. Is that you? Okay. Then number four is Doug Benson. You're over here. You've got a leather jacket.

Oh, I look good in that jacket. Yeah, that's a good jacket. Then it's Pete Davidson from SNL. He has a gun. I was probably hoping he'd be here tonight. Yeah. Sorry. Sorry.

He's doing shit Pat Kiernan Oh yeah, Pat Kiernan has to get up early tomorrow So he's not here He's funny And then here he has a nice picture of me petting a rabbit Yeah, that is weird I like this

Who's the girl? Rachel Feinstein Oh, okay, she does the show Yeah, that would have been another great one to be here. And then Aparna Nanachara. Oh, yeah, the names are all written on the top. I'm, like, asking you who all they are, and it's written right there. No, thank God they are.

Yeah, Aparna, yeah, she's great, too. This is great. Thank you, thank you, thank you. good good name tag hard-working person speaking of which uh jay i'm glad you picked bb8 from uh from katie yeah this is so cool yeah because she she knits a new fucking crazy thing almost every show I do. She's knitted the three-titted alien from Total Recall. She's done the alien facehugger. Alien facehugger is creepy as shit.

Yeah. I love it. But she always does a great job with the fucking crazy knitting. On an unrelated note, can I point out how funny it is as I sit here, the fattest guy on the panel, trying to pretend I don't want a donut so bad. I'm not taking one because the crowd will judge.

Have a donut! That one's a jelly. Take a donut! Have one if you want one. If I would have picked a donut, everyone would have been like, of course. So I went with knit work. What is this, like a

maple iced? No, I think that's just straight plain. Straight up. It's got icing on it. I think that's maple iced. It's glazed. Glazed. Let me smell it. Who wants a glazed? I'm going to put it, the guy with the hat right there, I'm going to put it right in your hand. Here we go.

I put it right in his hand. Can I zip one? Can I zip one out? Yeah. I want to zip one out. Let's see. I want to hit a target, too. Coconut.

The guy with the beard right there. Oh! Goddamn, this cannon of an arm. Who wants a heart? I want one. Who wants a heart? It's got to be a girl, man. I'm not going to...

I want to hit that Harry Potter sign. I want to hit that Harry Potter sign. Oh, that was high. Oh, the Harry Potter sign? Go for it. Oh, yeah! I'm going for the pick-me sign. I'm going for the pick-me sign. I'll go for the pick-me sign.

Oh. Can't trail up to bat. You winced over the top of that guy's head. Oh, right in the dick. Sorry, dude. Can't trail up to the goal. I'm going south. Send it.

Yeah. Balcony. Balcony. Right! Yeah! Balcony! Balcony! Right above it. Balcony! This is why you have to see this show live, because you have a chance to get hit in the face with a donut. Now all temptation is gone.

Yeah, we got rid of them. That's why we started throwing donuts, because I don't want them. Who are you playing for there, Trey? Aaron. Aaron brought some donuts. And she wrote the shithead on the back, which I don't want them. Who are you playing for there, Trey? Aaron. Aaron brought some donuts. And she wrote the shithead on the back, which I didn't realize when I had it open.

I don't know. Where's Aaron at? Oh, okay. You're right. Thought I recognized that name. Okay. We're going to play a series of games to determine who's going to win all the prize bag stuff.

And let's see how we're doing on time here. Oh, pretty good. You guys got to be anywhere tomorrow? It's Thursday night. Let's jumpstart the weekend. Let's go. Kickstart it. I don't care what expression you want to use.

Let's start with a game called Doug Loves Musicals. Oh, man. I know the four of you pretty well, I think, to know well enough that none of you know much about musicals. This isn't fair.

Rob's gay. Yeah. It's true. It's true. And black. And a Jew. Yeah. But I think, you know,

trust me, someone's going to get the answer right eventually. All right. Yeah, because I'm going to list off songs from a motion picture musical, and you guys just say into your mics, as soon as you think of it, first person to get it right, you can guess as many times as you want,

first person to name this musical is the winner of this game. Filler on the roof. You know, it's not a bad pre-guess, but incorrect. What movie musical has all of these songs in it? Without Love. I Know Where I've been. It takes two. The nicest kids in town.

West Side Story? Nope. Chicago? Nope. Jersey Boys? Nope. I can hear the bells. Sound. Nope. Jersey Boys. Nope. I Can Hear the Bells. Sound of Music.

Sound of Music is incorrect. Is your mic funky? I think it's a little funky. Oh, but there you got it. Oh, I got to hold the bottom. Hold the bottom. There you go. Look at that.

Oh, new one flying in. All right. Gramercy Theater. Hell yeah. Oh, new one flying in. Yeah. Gramercy Theater. Hell yeah. Oh, boy. That's got a hand job on accident. There we go. All right.

From the roadie. Yeah. But since your mic was weird for the whole show, we should probably start over. Hey, hey, hey, everybody. Oh, fuck. All right. Last one I said was, I can hear the bells. Ladies' choice. The shitty ABBA one. Last one I said was I can hear the bells Ladies choice

The shitty ABBA one No it is not Mamma Mia The new girl in town Oklahoma Run and tell that This was a movie too Martin Lawrence It's a movie musical

Movie musical You're timeless to me And the word your is in parentheses, if that helps at all. Oh. Timeless to me? The Emperor's New Clothes. That's a musical? It should be. Magic Mike?

South Pacific. Big, blonde, beautiful. Big, blonde, beautiful. Chorus line. Cats. South Pacific Big blonde beautiful Big blonde beautiful Chorus line, cats I like the way you're playing it Welcome to the 60s Does that help at all? Hair

Bye bye birdie Showgirls Quiet audience Quiet Good morning, Baltimore. Did somebody already say... Oh, shit. Miss Saigon.

Right? Miss Saigon? No. And Butterfly. Les Mis. But the next title, song title, is another beauty pageant. Miss Baltimore Crabs. Drop Dead Gorgeous.

Miss Baltimore Crabs. Drop Dead Gorgeous. Miss Baltimore Crabs. And finally, and let me look at each of you while I say this. The final song in this movie musical is called Hairspray. Hairspray! Let's go to the tape.

I think Trey won. Trey got it first. Third. That's the third game I've won. That was close. Counting the Pete thing. It's not how it works. You don't get points for every game you play.

I don't get cumulative. No, you don't. Damn it. No, you got to bring it on strong at the end. Still leading. Won nothing. Yeah. But great job, you got to bring it on strong at the end. Still leading, 1-0. Yeah. But great job, you guys.

I counted on you to not know any of those songs. Nailed it. And you came through for me. But now we're going to play a game called ABCD's Nuts. Yeah. All right. And it's a pretty simple game. It's not easy, but it's simple. We'll start with Trey,

and then we'll go to Jay, Rob, and then Mark. We're going to spell out a word. In other words, whatever we're spelling, the next letter when it gets to you, you can name any movie that begins with that letter. And if you say a movie that I've written down on this piece of paper in advance for your movie, you'll automatically win the whole game. But this is out of all movies ever made. So the odds of matching are not great, but it does happen for reasons I won't go into right now.

This was the other game that I won. Okay. You were good at this game? Yeah, in L.A. Okay. So we go through the alphabet? No, it's not the alphabet. We're going to spell something.

We're going to spell, in honor of its opening tomorrow, probably one of the greatest films. It's already a masterpiece in my mind London has fallen you know there was Olympus has fallen which means the White House and London has fallen which means London

alright so Trey start us off your letter is L and then it will be O to J etc any movie begins with the letter L start us off. Your letter is L and then it'll be O to J, etc. L. A name any movie begins with the letter L. Last of the Mohicans. No, I believe that's

The Last of the Mohicans. Fucking Looper then. I like the way you play. Word. We didn't have to hem and haw, we just got right to it. But next time your first answer will be your final answer. Agreed. And I should remind

you guys that you can each use the person who you're playing for tonight as a lifeline in the next game. Ah, damn it. I don't know why I brought it up now. Because if you can't think of a movie that begins with a letter,

I don't know what to do for you. Oh, fuck. I'm so nervous. O is your letter, Jay. Any movie that begins with the letter O. Oculus. Yeah, sure. I went with, oh, I didn't say my L

For L I went with Life Force Life Force Classic science fiction from canon There you go one guy likes it It's got a lot of naked bodies in it I think For O I went with 101 Dalmatians Ah

N is the next letter for you Rob Cantrell. Night of the Living Dead. Good answer. I went with Nil by Mouth. Wow. Mm-hmm. I don't know that one.

It was, I think it was directed by Tim Roth, if I'm not mistaken, or Gary Oldman. Same thing. You say Paxton, I say Pullman. Alright, so D is your letter. I'll say Dr. Zhivago. Oh, shit! Because I just said doctor?

Did you pick up on me accidentally saying doctor? No. Is that why you said that? I had that locked and loaded. Because I said doctor. Did you pick up on me accidentally saying doctor? No. Is that why you said that? I had that locked and loaded. Because I said doctor accidentally and stopped myself. Oh, no. I'm a big fan. But I went with doctor no.

All right. Yeah. But that's crazy. We both went doctor on the D letter. I thought you didn't hear me just say doctor. Locked and loaded. Okay. Oh.

Trey. Oh, brother, where art thou? Oh. hear me just say doctor. Locked and loaded. Okay. O. Trait. O, brother, where art thou? It's an O. It is. There's no the. You didn't match mine is all. Oh. Yeah.

No, you're right. I went with Honor, Majesty, Secret Service. Oh. Yeah. N is your next letter, Jay. Nighthawks starring Sylvester Stallone and Billy Dee Williams. That's a good one. Rutger Hauer

was in there. Sly looked tough in that shit with the leather gloves and the fucking weird beard and shit. Alright, sorry. Did you pick Nighthawks? I went with Never Say Never Again. I see what's happening. I got a theme. Shit.

Barbara Hershey movies. Clever. Rob, the next letter is H. Oh, H. What? I was like, oh, shit. No, but Halloween? Mm-hmm, that begins with H.

All right. I went with Howard's End. A for you, Mark. All right. I will go with Ant-Man. Mm-hmm. I said Alfie. Either version.

I would have accepted either version. Either Michael Caine or... Somebody's correcting you that it's Marvel's Ant-Man? Oh, shit. I could do another if I need to. No, no, I accepted you.

Well, yeah, you could do another now that you know it's Alfie. Just fucking say Alfie. There's two Alfies. Yeah, there's a Jude Law and a Michael Caine. But let's go with S for Trey. Any movie that begins with S. Spectre. Clever.

Good choice. I went with Sherlock Holmes. You asshole. You asshole. Shit. F to you, Jay. Trying to think how your mind works. Fright Night, the original.

Oh, not Fright Night, the original or Fright Night, the remake. I went with Four Weddings and a Funeral. Classic. Yeah. A is next for Rob. Apocalypse Now? Mm-mm. Shit.

I mean, yes. I'd be psyched to watch it. But I went with About a Boy. L is the next one for you, Mark. I'm going to go with Lock, stock, and two smoking barrels. That's what's written on this piece of paper. All right. All right.

That woman that caught the second one, that's the first time she ever caught anything in her life. The look on her face was like, it went into my hands and I still have it. If my dad could have seen that. What a great way to end a diet, huh? Nice job, Mark. So why did you say that movie?

Did you figure out there was a trend going on? I could sense the Limeys. You were going after the Brits there. Wasn't going after them, but we were doing London Has Fallen, so all of those movies have scenes in London. And the second L was Live and Let Die. The E was 84 Charing Cross Road.

And the N... Notting Hill. That's right. We made it to N. Great job, everybody. We did it. I feel alright about it. I think you're going to feel really great about what's about to happen now.

Someone just did a sexy lady whistle. Like a sexy lady was going to walk in. Or like we're going to suddenly turn into like a Thunder from Down Under male review. That ain't happening. Full Monty. The law says you can't touch, but I see a lot of lawbreakers out there. I got my sexy long johns on tonight, everybody.

Magic Mike. Magic Mark. Yay. We kicked off that team so quick. I got my sexy long johns on tonight, everybody. Magic Mike. Magic Mark. Yay! I would have kicked off that team so quick. We're going to play a little game called Last Man Stanton. Stanton. Stanton. All right.

And here's where the aforementioned lifeline comes into play. Yeah. Because we're going to get the name of an actor or an actress from somebody in the audience that I've already chosen. Oh, really? Ahead of time. Via Twitter. Okay.

For her good work with humanity. And then you guys are going to take turns, along with me, I'll play along, take turns naming movies that that person's been in. If you can't think of one, you're out. It's like ABCD's nuts, but much more intense.

And serious. But, one time, at any point during the game, some people wait until they can't think of any anymore, but others get it away, get it out of the way early, hoping that their lifeline will say a movie that maybe no one would say and keeps you alive.

Different strategies for different people. You can go once to the person that you're playing for in the audience to answer the question, and hopefully they'll play along in the spirit of the thing and not whip open their IMDB page on their phone. Just try to play fairly.

What's the game, sorry? We can see these soon. It's so funny that you should ask that because it's the first person who asks a question is out game. Ah, fuck. And I'm sorry, but you're a great first time guest.

All right. No, we're going to take turns naming some. I know it's hard to put your head around it when I haven't gotten the name yet. So it's going to be an actor or actress, hopefully a very famous one with a lot of credits. And we'll take turns naming movies that that person was in. Okay. And you get to go first because you won that last game. And then it will go to Rob and then Jay and Trey and me.

And the person I selected ahead of time, because she tweeted a picture of that delightful BB-8 that she knitted, I'm going to K80 Freeman on Twitter, Katie Freeman.

Wait, is it zero or D? Has this ever happened before? Because I don't want to get called for bullshit. She's picking the person. Yeah. And she's my lifeline. I love the coincidence of it. What the shit is this?

Yeah. I don't want to get called for bullshit if I win. It's entirely unfair, but also completely random. Yeah, it's also unfair you get to hold that thing. Random? Nothing! You could have picked somebody else. You could have fucking picked BB-8. Yeah, but I didn't because I don't like that character.

No, I don't like that character. You want a donut. I'm old school. Whatever. Boomy. I'll take it. I'll take it. And you know what? Episode 4 is the best one. Not Empire. What? Episode four is the best one, not Empire. What? What?

What? Anybody? All right. Why is it better? Because it just is. I rewatched it recently and was like, that's the best one. That really is the best one. Okay.

From beginning to end, it's solid. It gives you a good story and it gives you all the, you know what I'm saying. Let's just get on with this game. You're in a hurry? No. Yeah, so it's just a coincidence. It happened in the show in Tampa. Somebody picked a guy's name tag from the front row and then that guy was the guy I had selected to do this.

I'm playing under protest. I just want that to be noted. It's probably a name she knows a lot of movies for, but she may have decided on somebody that she doesn't know very well at all just because she'd be interested in us playing that name. Oh yeah, I'm sure that's it. Yeah.

Alright, so Katie, who are we going to play with? John Malkovich. John fucking Malkovich. Oh, fuck me. Yeah, that is a very interesting one. And we start with you, Mark. Just any movie that has John Malkovich in it.

Remind the audience, of course, to not give out suggestions. Can't seem to think of a title he might be in. No, I'll just get it out of the way. Get it out of the way. All right. Being John Malkovich. Yeah. Just get out of the way. Yeah. It's the best play from your position because, you know, now you live for another round and we go to Rob Cantrell.

Oh, shit. You're surprised by that? No. I thought he was going to keep going. You're like, oh, shit. What's another John Malkovich movie? Oh. Shit.

No, no, no. I know, it's a shame that he doesn't have more movies with his full name in the title. Seems to be a real career mistake on his part. All the President's Men? No. That girl said, what? Oh, that was great.

What was the one that he was the bodyguard? Shit. Oh, he was the killer in the bodyguard movie. Dude, Rob. You're just giving clues to the next person. So you want to be careful of that. Do you want to use your lifeline, Rob? Oh, yeah.

Please. I think ultimately it's not going to matter, but let's go ahead and just see where your lifeline's head is at. Who are you playing for? That gentleman right there? Oh, yeah. Do you got a good one for Malkovich?

He's making a face like, yeah, of course I do. Rounders. Rounders. Oh, yeah. Do you got a good one for Malkovich? He's like making a face like, yeah, of course I do. Rounders. Ah! Rounders. I had that one. Oh, yeah. Shit. Good job.

Do you think you are good at John Malkovich movie titles? Yes. All right, I'd like you to replace Rob for the rest of them. Oh, shit. What just happened? You guys could be a team. Just whispered Rob's ear. He didn't waste any time getting up there.

No, he was, as soon as I said that, he's like, yes, I'm going to get up there. That sounds like a great idea. Yeah, all right. It's going to work out better for him. Okay, this has got to be a second protest then on my part. So I'm filing two protests. Shit. And I haven't even gotten to go yet.

All right. All right, so Jay? Con Air. Of course. Good one, good one. Trey? Fuck this up man Aaron you got a good one

you have one it's not the same one that I have alright Aaron I'm gonna use my lifeline on this one alright you're gonna try to stick around ah that was my other one you whore oh shit hey man

I got this Aaron what the fuck man why you calling one, you whore. Oh, shit. Hey, man. I got this, Aaron. What the fuck, man? Why you calling my girl a whore? We used to fuck. There's going to be a fight. Oh, comic fight. Disrespect. Yeah, you're welcome.

Sorry. Sorry about that, Aaron. What would you have said if it was a dude that said your title that you had? Depends on the ethnicity. That's honest. Damn it. Those are my big two. Great answer. Great answer.

All right. Burn after reading. Oh, my God. It is funny how, like, Malkovich has been in a shit ton of stuff. Yeah, I know. But, like, I'm embarrassed I can't think of any. Like, I turn red. Mark, you're next. Was that a clue?

Sheesh, I had two locked and loaded. I got to use old Bill here. You got one, Billy? Really? You're going to Bill? Well, I mean, I had two, and then Dev over here stepped in, and then you pulled out the big hoe bag there. That's it. That's it, Norman. I'm joking.

Me and you, dude. She's a classy lady. You guys should arm wrestle or something. Say the word, Aaron. I'll beat his ass. I love you, Aaron. I'm joking. I hate you, dude. She's a classy lady. You guys should arm wrestle or something. Say the word, Aaron. I'll beat his ass. I love you, Aaron. Take me back. All right.

So you're going to go to your lifeline? Of Mice and Men. Oh! Of Mice and Men. Good choice. Yeah, okay. All right, Bill. Keep thinking.

Ask amongst yourselves. All right, Robin. Robin is partner. He's killing me, man. Just a film. Red? What? Alright, you're out.

Why did you tell him to say red when I just said red? I thought you were giving him a clue. Shut up. Hey, man, what the shit? You know what? Third protest. Three. I think that's unprecedented.

Or am I on four? How many am I on, you guys? Do you want another one? No, I don't want another one. I'm sorry, Doug. I didn't realize you said it. I'm sorry, man. Got a huge reaction. I think it went over a lot of people another one. I'm sorry, Doug. I didn't realize you said it. I'm sorry, man. Got a huge reaction.

I think it went over a lot of people's heads that I said red, but I said red. And that's how the game works. You're out. That was harsh. No, you can say another one. That's all right. You just can't say that one that guy yelled out. Okay.

Red two is off the table. Dangerous Liaison Yes Good job Can I use him? Hell no man Alright alright Everybody's life line Jay's got another one

I hope I'm getting the title right Blown Away? Jeff Bridges? He was like the bomber guy? No. You're so close. People know what he's talking about, and they're going to keep quiet.

Should we move on to... Sorry, Katie. Oh, yeah, go ahead and use your lifeline. Oh, lifeline, yes. Making Mr. Right. Making Mr. Right. That is right. Crushed it.

Trey? I think I'm going to fuck up the title. Go for it. Fuck. In the Line of Fire? Correct. That for it. Fuck. In the Line of Fire? Correct. That's it. Good one. Cock.

Can't believe that guy yelled out red too. That's what I was going to say. And not even, he was like, there was a second one. Two. Asshole, that was in the pocket. That's all right. It was in all of our pockets.

What would you yell at him, Mark? Huh? All right. Oh, hey. What ethnicity is that guy? What are you? What ethnicity are you? He's Puerto Rican.

What would you say to him? Hey, you look great. Ah. Yeah. Ah. You took my title. You look great. Ah.

You took it and looked great doing it. I love the 40s. All right. Let's see. All right, let's see. All right. Am I at a light? Oh, you're up. Is it you?

I think it's you. I think it's me. Yeah. And I'm in trouble. And I don't have a lifeline. So unless something just bangs into my head, there's that one that he did that one time where he was like, what? You know, you get stuck on one,

and you can't think of the proper title for it. So I think I'm going to have to say I'm out. I know there's a lot of good ones left. Took a lot of guts. Yeah. I just can't think of any right now. Mark? Well, I don't know.

I'm trying to go off Jay's answer, which was wrong, and try to spin it. Oh, he meant in the line of fire when he was... Oh, he did? Yeah. Oh, fuck. Well, then shit, I might have nothing. I thought you said blown away. I was going to say a couple other things with those words in it.

I'm curious to know what those are. Blown the fuck away. I was going to say blow, breathless, and out of breath, which I don't think is a movie you thought that he was that Blown Away was a movie about someone who's just shocked by something yeah that's all I had, I was reaching

I would have also accepted panting and and winded. I'm just going to throw one out. How about Merchant of Venice? Right? Why wouldn't he be in something called that? Is he in that?

No. He seems very, you know, Shakespeare-y. All right, we're down to Rob and his partner. You mean his partner. Yeah. His life partner. Does he have another one? Yeah.

What's it? Of course he's got another one. Warm bodies. Warm bodies. Okay. Good job, my man. This son of a bitch knows his Malkovich.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Katie, I'm so sorry. Just because I feel like he played somebody's mafia uncle in something. I'm throwing a dart here. Knock around, guys. Hey, we have a yes over here. Is that right?

He was waiting for it. He was waiting for that one. What a pull. Yeah. I'll accept that. Was that an indie film? I never saw it, but I'll accept it. Trey?

It seems like I... I don't know, man. True Romance? Not a bad guess. Yeah, not a bad guess. Seems like he'd be in that for a second. You'd think he'd play the Gary Oldman character. The dreads and the weird eye. I'm sorry, Trey.

Well, my other guess was I'm going to get you sucker, so I think true romance was probably the better guess there. Yeah, those were both interesting guesses, but incorrect. Sorry, Aaron. There's just one movie I can't think of. Anyway, Mark. I thought I was out.

Oh, yeah, you are. Oh, so Rob won, Mark. I thought I was out. Oh, yeah, you are. Oh, so Rob won. Surprise. I'm still in. James is. Sorry, James. But I got nothing. The two people with friends.

So let's see what Rob and his partner have cooked up. Do you have something? Oh, they don't have something. This is like... I like having Devin. This is like having my bodyguard the movie. But instead of a fight. But he's got nothing.

But my bodyguards fucking can't take down Big Jay. Come on. Suspenseful. Oh, I have no fucking clue. Somebody in the audience made a buzzer sound. In the loop. In the loop. What? In the loop?

He should be in In the Loop, but I don't think he is. Nobody thinks he's in In the Loop. As an audience, we're all in agreement that John Malkovich is not in the loop. But thanks for helping out, Rob. And congratulations to Big Jay. Pulled it out. Made it out. Made it happen.

I'm on the board. Solid. I had a really good feeling about that someone would be able to win, even with Rob having a helper. It was awesome. He gave me a back rub. It was nice. He was really digging in over there?

No. I got a creak neck right now. Yeah. Well, congratulations. Mark, can you get in there? You've never won the prize bag before, have you? Oh, she has won before. Oh, my God. You got to go.

This whole thing seems so rigged now. But congratulations, Katie. Way to go, Katie. K80 Freeman on Twitter. And we don't get to read the shithead because she won, but you can look at it if you want. Oh, you read the other ones. This thing is amazing. What are some other Malkovich?

Anybody know? Somebody always asks before I do. Oh, sorry, sorry. So what movies did we miss? Making Mr. Right. Was he? Johnny English? Empire of the Sun?

Jonah Hex? I'm going to say each one with a question mark. Like, I don't believe you. Eragon? God, he's in a lot of shitty movies He really is Tough shit, me and Katie already won Yeah

Such a great actor though But we named his best ones right out of the gate Being John Malkovich, Con Air That's pretty much it You still have donuts left? I was saving them Alright Throw

Want me to throw it? You still have donuts left? I was saving them. All right. Throw them. Throw them. Want me to throw it? Yeah, throw another donut. All right, all right. Might as well. I'm just rolling around aimlessly. This is a jelly, so this couldn't get ugly.

Hit that light up there. It's a jelly. Can I hit the light? Send it. I mean, the one waving around. Send it. There she is. She really wants it.

Look at her shake it. Show your tits. No. She almost did. She did. I'm from New Orleans. She almost did. He's from New Orleans. It's a curved donut.

What is this? Laser beam. Look at this, you guys. Throw it. Looks like it's loaded. Thanks, dude. This is just for it's loaded. Thanks, dude. This is just for me to keep? Yeah.

Thanks, man. Wow, what a cool show. You got a wooden box. It might end up in my home or on Getting Doug With High or in a prize bag. You never know when people give me shit. You never know where it's going to go. Yeah, but thank you. What's your name so I can give you a shout-out on the Internet?

Paul. Paul. All right, Paul. Paul. Give me your name tags that have shitheads on them. I've got to have those ready to go at the end of the show here. And we'll start down there with Mark. What kind of stuff do you have to

plug, buddy? What's coming up on your calendar? Let's see. March 8th. I'm on Ari Shafir's show. This is not happening. Nice. When does this come out?

Tomorrow, I happening. Nice. When does this come out? Tomorrow-ish. Oh, great. Next, you know, the weekend coming up at the Laughing Skull in Atlanta. And check out my podcast, Tuesdays with Stories with Joe List. So, yeah. And I'll be on Conan in May. All right. Yeah, so just turn on Conan and leave it on until sometime in May.

Then he will be there and you'll be like, oh, shit. 23rd, I think. May 23rd. Oh, it is May 23rd? Yeah. Oh, okay. Are you on? On what?

Oh, never mind. Yeah, we're on the same episode. What a coincidence. Yeah. Follow that, fucker. I get to go first. First time ever they just have a couple

stand-up sets back-to-back. But that's awesome. Thank you for being on the show for the very first time. You did a good job. I think he probably wouldn't have been so rude to my audience

if it wasn't full of a bunch of whores. But, you know, when whores show up, you gotta, you know, you gotta break out the donuts. I love you, Aaron. You gotta say, she's a great whore. Yeah. One of those heart of gold types.

But you're the first guy to ever get somebody in the audience to show their tits so i gotta have you back all right often and what are you doing uh rob cantrell what's going on man what do you got to plug um union hall in brooklyn on march 21st check it out 8 30 i'm doing my uh kind of a one-man show of my weirdest material called Keep It Surreal. So check that out. And then I have a slamming hip-hop CD online that you can check out. And then I'm doing

the DC. There's a small comedy festival but at a couple cool rock clubs in DC coming up in April. I think it's April 13th I'm doing the Big Hunt and then maybe a couple other shows. Look out for that. Rob Cantrell, everybody. Big Jay Oakerson, what do you got to plug?

Well, if you're listening live, I'll be at Providence Comedy Connection this weekend and other cool things. You know, my three shows, talking about Bonfire, SDR Show, Legion of Skanks, and also March 17th, premiering on CISO.com, which is NBC's new streaming service. I have a new show called What's Your Fucking Deal coming out, where I host it. Great show.

And all comics do crowd work on it. Mark Norman was on that show. It was fucking hilarious. And also coming out in a few months, I don't have an exact date yet, I just recently, last weekend, two weekends ago, filmed my first hour, one hour special for Comedy Central. Thank you.

Thank y'all. I'm pretty good at crowd work. Let me show you how good I am at it. What's your name, dude? Paul Bauer? See? I guessed his last name. I'm on the show.

Trey, what are you... Is that how crowd work works? You just guess names? Crushed it. Trey. What do you got coming up, Trey Gallion? Next Wednesday, the 9th, for you guys here in the city,

I got my show at the Creek in the Cave. Word. Yeah, come on out. 8 o'clock. It'll be fun. Spacious venue. Yeah, and they got a bar downstairs, and they're pot friendly. And then May 13th and 14th, the Velveeta Room in Austin.

May 18th through 21st at Cap City in Austin. And then June 2nd through 5th, Colorado Springs. Fuck yeah. Those are great credits. Did you point at me before you said Colorado Springs? It was more of like an arm thing. What's the name of the venue there in Colorado Springs? Looney's Comedy Corner.

Don't get loony. Oh, it's in a strip mall. So it is the corner. Right next to a dispensary. Really? Yeah. Oh, boy. I love Colorado Springs.

It's fun. All right, cool. Yeah, man. So that's fun. All right, cool. Yeah, man. So that's it. All of that sounds great. And my CD's on Spotify and Rhapsody and all that shit, too. Okay. That's it.

Very nice. Nothing for Andy Ritchie? One more time for Andy Ritchie. R.I.P. Andy Ritchie. There we go. Great guy. Great comment. Richie.

Great guy. Great comic. It felt like they brought all of the house lights up so this one woman could find her seat. But that's not. That was just weird timing. They brought the lights up like, show's over, get out. But I still have my plugs.

I'm doing stand-up and Doug Loves Movies a couple days apart at the Improv in San Jose. That's March 24th and 26th. DougLovesMovies.com for all of my stuff. What do you guys think about does anybody have an idea for a hashtag to describe

this episode? What stood out in your minds? Piece of Andy Ritchie? Yeah, hashtag. Hashtag Aaron's a whore. Let's run it by her. Is that okay if we do hashtag Aaron's a whore? How do you spell it?

E-R-I-N. W-H. That's E-R-I-N, Zahor. Hashtag my rap CD, Dreams Never Die. No. Hashtag no. Dreams Never Die. L-O-L-O-R-O-L-O-F-M.

What was that other one you said? Piece of what? Oh, Piece of Andy Ritchie. Piece of Andy Ritchie. Reindeer Games? Donut. The audience is making suggestions now. I don't get it. Oh, Re of Andy Ritchie. Reindeer Games? Donut. The audience is making suggestions now. I don't get it.

Oh, Reindeer Games. Right. Oh, yeah. I got it. Thank you. On Spotify on Rhapsody? Yeah. Hashtag Spotify.

Hashtag Rhapsody. Erin's not a whore for the record. She's a virgin. She's got The opposite Nice vibe Call me You really should He's a very nice fellow

Looking to settle down Oh and all the better If you're married then he'll just have sex with you Yeah It's even hotter Alright one more time Oh, all the better. If you're married, then he'll just have sex with you. Yeah. It's even hotter. It'll work out great. All right, one more time for all of my guests.

Mark Norman, Rob Cantrell. Thank you. Big Jay Oakerson. Thanks, you guys. Trey Gallion. Are you trying to keep that thing? No, I'm going to give it back. I'm just going to hold on to it.

You're just hanging on to it. He's really taking care of it for you. No, I'm going to give it back. I'm just holding on to it. You're just hanging on to it. He's really taking care of it for you. It's like they should have, when kids do that thing in school where they have to carry around a fake baby, they should just have their own little knitted BB-8 to carry around. You look very comfortable with it. So weirdly comfortable. Yeah.

I've made her give me stuff before, but this one I think she should keep. Yeah, it's pretty great. It's pretty nice. How about for Katie? Yeah, Katie! You should bring it to everybody. No, you drink those.

Come on, someone will drink this shit. She gave back the booze. Throw them, throw them. No, we're definitely not fucking. Yeah, let's throw those. Throw them. Throw them, they're class. Oh, look, Aaron the whore wants them.

Hand them. Yeah, give them both to Aaron. Yeah, come on.. Aaron the whore wants them. Hand them. Give them both to Aaron. Yeah, come on. Aaron, you whore. Aaron's a boozy whore. I'm changing it to. Dab a little of that booze on your butthole like baby gums. Nice.

You haven't changed. Same old skank. All right, you got one more Norman And that's it I'm good She's learned her lesson What do you think ever happened To that banana cream pie What

I thought it hit the floor I'm sure It's on her purse It's just a mess on the floor Sorry lady It's the downside To. It's just a mess on the floor. Oh, sorry, lady. It's the downside to booking Doug Loves Movies in your venue. There might be pie on the floor. Or donuts.

But thanks a lot, you guys. We did it. Thank you, brother. Thank you for having us. That was super fun. Thank you, guys. When do I become like defending? I'm 3-0 now.

You never lose? I've never lost yet. Wait, so you won the whole thing? You got the whole thing? He won, yeah. Ah. I didn't know. That's why my girl Katie got the prize pack.

Trey won, I got one, and then he got one. Yeah, but he got the most important one. Oh, the last one. Yeah, you guys are just winning in the prelims. Oh, I should have waited. And he took it home in the final. But you'll have another shot. We'll do this again.

I'd love to come back. This is a lot of fun. Always fun. Thank you for having me, Doug. Thank you, Doug. Thanks, guys. Peace. Thank you.

Thank you. I thought they'd never leave. Because I need another... Oh, she loves you, Jay. Is he single these days? I don't think so. I think he's got a nice lady. Oh, you love his girlfriend, too.

Three-way, Jay. I'll hook you up. Just wanted to take another moment to say to you guys, stick around and buy tickets for the April 25th show If you can plan that far ahead And thank you guys so much for coming As you always do

It's fucking cold as fuck outside tonight If I lived here I'd be like I'm gonna stay in and watch Ghost I would never say that I don't know why I chose ghost But as always Negan is a shithead That's the Walking Dead reference

Tim Horton is a shithead Written on a Dunkin Donuts box And Donald Drumpf is a shithead! Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you, cause Doug

loves movies!