Doug Loves Movies - Brandon Wardell, Seth Herzog, Colt Cabana and Lisa DeLarios guest

Episode Date: March 19, 2017

Live from the Stateside Theatre in Austin as part of SXSW, Doug welcomes Brandon Wardell, Seth Herzog, Colt Cabana and Lisa DeLarios to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeenies, maybe sticky seeds With 50 acid popcorn kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Because Doug loves boobies Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. And this is Doug Loves Movies. Wow, that's pretty nice.

Pretty good job, you guys. We're coming to you once again from the... It says in big letters outside, State Theater, but in the program it says Stateside Theater, and I say, good for you, State or Stateside Theater. YV pinned down with just one name, like the stupid Paramount next door. It's not Paramount Side.

Oh, now I get it. Because it's on the side of Paramount where the State Capitol building is. My eighth year at South Byron, I figured that one out. Good job. You never knew that? How long have you lived here, gray-haired dude?

25 years You never thought, why does it say stateside in the program? Because I think if you live here and you drive by You just think it's the state theater, right? Alright, we've talked about it too much and of course this is part of South by Southwest in Austin Texas it's Saturday March 18th 2016 I know a lot of you probably got your drunk on in a very serious way yesterday

for St. Pat... Like, St. Patrick's Day, I'm insane. Every year, I'm here at downtown Austin on St. Patrick's Day. That's not smart. Gets fucking crazy. Yeah, okay, we all agree on that.

So thank you for coming down here right before it starts to get crazy. When you get out of here, just run. Like, the world could probably end out there while we're doing this show. Sorry to bring everybody down with that concept. But since you got trashed yesterday, and since you're at a film festival where you've got other things to do, I don't expect a high volume of name tags in the audience,

but I know there are some, because I got tweeted some. Some good ones. Don't see any of those. There's just these. No, you guys tweeted yours. And you've got... what does that say? Donnie Darko?

And your name's Donica. You didn't have to change. Oh, you did change it to Donica Darko. Okay, I was going to accuse you of not changing anything. Like there was a guy here one time, his name was Grit. He comes in with a true Grit poster. There's a big one there.

I can't tell exactly what's going on there, but it looks good. What's that? It's Brentasia. And it's drawn by you, this whole thing, right? And it's Mickey Mouse during the Sorcerer's Apprentice segment of Fantasia. And I'm right there enjoying

a bowl, or is that supposed to be me? That's me smoking a bowl while Mickey's trying to deal with all these fucking mops. The mops are coming to life, and I'm over in the corner, hey, I'm just gonna smoke here, man. I'm sure the place will be really clean when they're done with you. Oh, there's one up there that I saw today on Twitter that I liked a great deal. It's Die Hard themed. The dude's name is, what is it, Nicolosia? Well, it's Nicasio. Nicasio.

Well, I at least tried. Fucking Nicasio. And, yeah, and it's a total Die Hard thing but it's uh instead he changed it to uh nick hard and there's a hole in his penises coming through it no it's um it's the hostage person in diehard with a santa hat on it's very very creative and very large hat on. It's very, very creative and very large. If there was the largest poster name

tag, you would win. Thank you to everybody. I'm horrified by me instead of Johnny Depp's face in that Alice in Wonderland. Show the audience. Stand up and show the audience, sir. Yeah. What's your name name Alex in Wonderland

yep good job it's time thanks to everybody who brought name tags it's time for Doug plugs the High Court has one more week of new episodes Monday through Thursday at midnight 11 central time here in this region of the world and that's on Comedy Central

so please watch so they let me make more and thanks Douglas Movies returns to UCB Franklin in LA Tuesday night March 21st we're going to be at Helium It's a Gas in Portland

Oregon and that show is sold out Douglas Movies but the next day I'm doing a stand up We're going to be at Helium, it's a gas, in Portland, Oregon. And that show is sold out, Douglas Movies, but the next day I'm doing a stand-up show. That's Sunday, March 26th at 420. Bring a name tag. We'll play Last Man Standing with the audience members during the show. And New York City, April 2nd and 3rd. All my dates and deets and links are at DouglasMovies.com. That's Douglas Movies.com.. Alright, that's a newer thing. You didn't have to be great at it.

From the corrections department, Crispin Glover was in Willard, not Rats. They said Rats, so I was just like, yeah, he's in a Rat movie. Okay, great. Wrong Rat movie, Doug. But people were nice about it. Everyone in the corrections department writes, you've probably read this already.

But, quibble, quibble, quibble. I've got two bags. That's how much stuff I put in the prize bag for this particular outing of the show. You're going to be amazed by there's actually some good stuff in here but there's some dumb stuff too. Like this, a bag of

Rhythm Superfoods kale chips. Now I'm not interested in a kale chip but they really pushed it over the I'm never going to eat these edge when it's the cool ranch flavor. I don't want to eat cool ranch of anything. What the fuck is that? What flavor is that?

It's ranch. Okay. Settle down. They're giving these away. I don't approve necessarily because I'm trying to be a good judge. I don't approve necessarily because I'm trying to be a good judge but here at South By if you go to that Kegs and Eggs place

it's probably closed now for the rest of the festival but if you went by there and you spun a wheel if you spinned a wheel and it lands on the high court they give you high court rolling papers and I'm passing one of those along

to the winner of the prize bag. Plus a copy of my most recent CD, Promotional Tool. And a copy of the DVD, Air Buds, the podcasting documentary that my friend Graham Elwood made. Oh, speaking of friends, Noelle Wells is a friend of the show.

Her movie, Mr. Roosevelt, won two awards. I can't believe I'm in an award-winning movie. I thought I was going to have to wait for Lego Batman to win the Oscar for Best Animated Movie, but no. Mr. Roosevelt, I'm in it briefly, and the rest of the movie's great.

And it's so good that it won the Lone Star Award, which is movies that are set in or filmed in Austin, Texas. And then it won Audience Award for Narrative Feature. So good for her. While I'm bragging about friends of mine that had great movies, Edgar Wright's Baby Driver won the Headliner Award of all the big premieres. They liked that one the best. And Kumail Nanjiani and Emily Gordon's movie, The Big Sick, won a thing called Festival Favorites, and it's an amazing movie.

So, anyway, this is a pamphlet that they're using, that Noelle made, Noelle Wells made to promote Mr. Roosevelt, and it's really super cute. You know, it doesn't take too long to read, and it's got illustrations, and it starts like this. This is emily she's back in austin for the weekend like it's if it's if you're at like a trump level reading that's where your reading level's at you'll totally get what's going on there you'll be like okay emily that's good she's back for the weekend. It's probably going to be huge. It's going to be a spectacular weekend. Speaking of Edgar Wright,

a baby driver, a small mini, a baby poster for baby driver signed by Edgar Wright. Yeah. That's how close we are. I got him to sign a thing.

I think he signed I just signed a bunch of them but it's still going in the bag it's still awesome you guys are gonna love that movie it doesn't come out till August I like I think you're better off than I am after having seen it because I'm dying to see it again you guys are like I don't know if I'm going to like it. That's stupid. You're going to like it. A pipe from Peacemaker.

I swear to you guys, I brought so much. Look at this. Some Mardi Gras beads that are little pot leaves. Yeah, I got those for showing my dick to a nice young gentleman. And I was on Jimmy Kimmel Live recently, and they had coasters, so I grabbed one of those coasters. I was on the 311 cruise. A guy made a cool patch that says Cosmo on it,

so I'm going to put that in there. I got some buttons and some guitar picks and a little green thing that's cool to hold your dab materials in. You guys into dabbing? Okay. And then, first of all, this bag is hilarious. True TV at South by Southwest, they had a lounge for comedians working the festival,

and this tote bag just says on it, another fucking bag. So True TV has got a real attitude. And then also, decorating the party, they had this pillow everywhere, so I took one. Because it says, do not steal on it. And I was like, that, in the green room of a comedy show, it says True TV on it. And I was like, in the green room of a comedy show

it says True TV on it. That is made to be stolen. If there's still some there, people are dumb. So that's in the prize bag. Plus, all the stuff brought by my guests. As you can see, we have four fabulous folks that are here in

Austin right now coming out to this stage. Please give a big warm welcome to Brandon Wardell, Lisa This pillow barely fits in this bag, so you have to do a whole thing like, you know, with the pillowcase. Thank you. You guys are going to be there to help me out with all my words today. These seats look so comfy. The ones that they're in. The ones that they're in.

The ones that they're in. Yeah. We're in director's chairs, which are never my first choice for a chair. You know, like, they're just kind of weird, and they're very creaky usually, but these are quiet ones. Right? Yeah. I'm rocking this really hard.

These are top-of-the-line director's chairs, I gotta say. Like, the first place I ever lived in L.A was like super broke, but I like found a director's chair like on the street. And then I would just like sit in that in my room and feel important. Even though I had zero dollars in my checking account. Was it the only piece of furniture you had in your house? It was, oh, I did not have a couch in that place. Did you put your name on the back of it?

What's that? Did you put your name on the back of it? Oh yeah that? Did you put your name on the back of it? Oh, yeah, I should have. Hey, do you guys want to talk about movies a little bit? Yeah, okay, right. This isn't the chair podcast. I'm settling in. No, I mean, you know, that was awesome to get that insight from all of you, but...

I want to introduce everybody so that the listeners know exactly which pearls are being dropped by whom. And let's start with the first time guest on the show. I've known him for a while, so it's about goddamn time. Brandon Wardell is here, everybody.

Hi. Hey. You were a bailiff on the High Court program. So I'd love to thank you for doing that at this time. Super fun. I haven't told you about this. The other day I got a text from my mom. It was like, hey, when does that show where you play a cop come out?

And I was like, oh, it's not coming out. I don't know. So you're really cool with her just not seeing it? No, I think I, no, I just, I was like, mom, I, it came, and I smoke kush. Mom, I smoke kush. You know, she knows. But I was like, oh, if you can watch it on Comedy Central On Demand, but I smoke kush on it. Did you learn it by watching her? Yeah, my mom's not cool enough to

She doesn't play us I mean, she does now She watched the show And now we ruined her life That's Lisa Delarios, everybody Austin Comedy Phenom. Phenom. You joined us on this program last at Fantastic Fest, I believe.

Yes, and Capital City Comedy Club. Did you ever win the games? I won one time. At Fantastic Fest? Yes. All right. But I didn't feel that proud of myself because it wasn't a culmination of points. I actually was losing hard

until the very last game and I just kind of won. Well, let me remind you that's how it works is those first games don't mean shit. That's why I'm back. All it is is just to shake it up a bit before we get into the real business. And also it's fun.

Super fun. I hope. I hope it is. Good luck to you today. Thank you. Back with us once again, it's our buddy Colt Cabana on the other end. Hey, Doug. You guys probably figured it out. I'm going

alphabetical here. So, Colt Cabana. Correct. Do you know my middle name? Uh-uh. Well, Colt Cabana is obviously a fake name, so I haven't made up

a fake middle name yet. What? Oh, you should have a fake middle name contest. Great idea. What's Colt Cabana's middle name? Oh, and people in the audience already have suggestions.

She rose her hand like it was a real contest. She's like, I know his middle name. I know it. I met like on the internet, She rose her hand like it was a real contest. She's like, I know his middle name. I know it. I met on the internet, but what's your suggestion here in the front row? Casper. It's a wonderful middle name.

But someone right nearby immediately said, that's racist. Why would that be racist? You can't be named after a color anymore, I guess. Because it's, you know... Casper? Yeah, that's white. He's white. And also... It's a sheet.

It's a white sheet over a person sometimes. I thought it was the ghost of a dead child. Well, another great reason to not have it as your middle name. Yeah, exactly. If you're a wrestler. And on my podcast, Helix sponsors me, so we don't say the word Casper, alright guys?

Thank you. Was that a bad podcast joke on a podcast about advertisements? Wait, what does that mean? Casper is the ghost. The mattress that advertises with everybody, except the Art of Wrestling with Gold Cabana. I have no idea

what's going on. Wait. There's a mattress? It's very inside. There's mattress money to be made in this game? Yeah. I don't think I've ever had any mattress commercials. What's the name of the company? Casper. Casper Mattress. Am I? Oh, there are Casper Mattresses. It's called... Yeah, I've never

heard of it. I've never heard of Casper Mattresses. It's a new company, I think. What pods are advertising Casper Mattresses? We don't support them. Helix once bought one advertisement from me, so I stay true to Helix. Is that another mattress company?

Yeah, they come in a box, they pop out, they didn't send me one for free. What about these goddamn mattress companies that I've never even heard of? It ain't no sleepers. Everybody knows Empire Carpet Cleaning, right? From Chicago. Yeah.

Yeah, we all know that one. Thank you. Five, eight, eight. Three, two, hundred. Oh. Empire. Yeah. Oh, wow.

I think we got the number wrong, though. It's two, three. That's a great, yeah, no, you ruined it. I wanted to give the wrong number a bunch of calls. Give somebody else a chance. Just someone else to show up at your house. First Empire is like the leading carpet cleaning place. Now they're a hit show on Fox.

So, Seth. Hey, Doug Benson. Seth Herzog is here. Thank you, everybody. Glad to make it. Probably the most fun Herzog I've ever come across. That is true. That is true. Much more fun than Werner.

Yeah, he's just bleak and sad. He's dark at dinner. Honest. He's too honest about everything. Bears. That's all he talks about is bears. What's up with you, buddy? You're in Austin, Texas.as i'm in austin uh just for the just for the day i just thought i'd come down and see what what it's like on a saturday

um it's really crowded there's a lot of branding on everything i had no idea that's what it's like here um yeah they have to wrap uh saran wrap around all the street poles and yeah any place where people can put posters and people go nuts putting the posters on there around all the street poles and any place where people could put posters. And people go nuts putting the posters on there for all the South By things. And then they could just tear the whole thing off of the pole when South By is over. Oh, why don't they just get rid of the poles? You know what? I think

streetlights out there are making it less safe. I think I think 6th Street after dark should be just dark. Dark. Can't see shit. Good luck, everybody.

Yeah. Sixth Street by itself should just be like The Purge, just that one block. You can kill whoever you want. It kind of already is. I know. We're like one cop not being there away from being The Purge. Dark and dirty. Sixth.

It's like the purge, but people are just handing you mixtapes. Yeah. I love that people are always handing you DVDs and CDs as if I have anywhere to play this. Right. What am I going to do with your CD? They should also hand you a CD player.

Like a Walkman. But Sith, Seth, can you be more Sith? Sith Lord. Finally, someone finally pronounced it right. Could you elaborate as to why you're in Austin tonight? Yeah, I'm hosting. The Roots are doing a show across the street tonight. Lucky son of a bitch.

No joke, five-hour jam session. Wish I was kidding. And I'm sort of the emcee. He emcees the whole thing. I emcee the whole thing. So I bring up all the different acts and do some jokes. And the Roots have you do that all the time. All the time. This is like the seventh

or eighth one I've done, yeah. It's so great. It's fun. It's a long night. It'll end at four. So that's basically the reason they keep bringing you back is because of your stamina? The stamina. I'm the only one who can stay up that long. Yeah.

You know what I'm talking about? Wink, wink to the viewers at home. Oh, thank you for squeezing this into your one crazy long day. Yeah. Your flight landed today? No, last night at 1 a.m. Oh, 1 a.m. Okay, good.

Well, that is today. You're right. Yes, one long day. I need some vodka. Wow. Do you have Ebola, Doug? No, okay. I just love vodka. I wasn't asked that

because you were drinking. I have a few questions to ask everybody, starting with, we'll go with you, Colt. Oh, wait, we never found out his middle name.

Oh, what it really is? He said it, didn't he? Cabbage. Cabbage? Oh, wait, we never found out his middle name. Oh, what it really is? He said it, didn't he? Cabbage. Colt Cabbage Cabana. I love how everybody is just yelling out C words. There's nothing more threatening than cabbage. If you were hardcore, you'd yell out the real C word.

Colt 45 cabana. What about Copa? Yeah, Colt Copa cabana. I was thinking Colt luxurious cabana by the pool. You have to add a few more words. But yeah. I will say, by the way, I said Copa earlier, but it was like quiet and people were like

no it's just it just feels like it feels like you know when like you were in class and like you would say a joke but nobody heard it and then somebody said it louder than you and everybody laughed and you were fucking mad the rest of the day and then like you think about it like when you're 24

I totally feel you less of a clap for both of us making that joke great minds it wasn't even like a metaphor it's exactly what happened yeah it's literally what happened it's there is an interesting um acoustic situation on the stage that i've encountered previously. And it's hard to hear everybody. Oh, yeah. Clearly. And all the time.

So at any point, if you feel like you weren't heard, say it again. Yeah. Okay. Oh, maybe the way... Worst thing to say to a bunch of comedians. I've got a Casper joke to make that I felt wasn't heard. I'd prefer your ghost jokes to be not heard rather than not seen. Go ahead, though. I don't think he has one.

Oh, yeah, I'm not a real comedian. Oh, you don't even have one? Oh, damn it. I'm a pro wrestler. I did a callback. I thought that was good enough. Thank you. How often in your daily life

do you use I'm a pro wrestler as an excuse for something? It's great, though. I got 14 items, so what? I'm a pro wrestler. I don't know what accent I was giving you there, but, um... Okay, so, but what do you have for the prize bag, though?

Oh, prize bag. That was where we were headed. Gotcha. I feel every time I'm gonna sit on this thing... You brought a lovely South by Tote bag that they give everybody. South by Southwest Tote bag given to me for free time I'm going to sit on this thing. You brought a lovely South by tote bag that they give everybody. South by Southwest tote bag given to me for free because I'm a musician. But I said, I'm not a musician. I'm a pro wrestler.

Still got a music badge. South by sends me a thing every year. How many roadies do you have? What kind of amps do you need? Like it's all this shit. I'm just like, I'm just going to come talk. Yeah. I'm just going to put on my baby oil,

throw on the spandex, fight some dudes. That's all I want to do. The software is just all about bands. Not comedians and wrestlers. This is an Austin-based wrestling company that I wrestle for. There's a t-shirt called Wrestle Circus. It's the reason why I was down

here. We did a show at Emo's yesterday. It was amazing. You should support them if you're in Austin. Wrestle Circus. And it's like, I feel at least, it's very soft and nice. It's the reason why I was down here. We did a show at Emo's yesterday. It was amazing. You should support them if you're in Austin, Wrestle Circus. And it's like, I feel at least, it's very soft and nice. It's one of those softies. Oh, yeah, that is a fine poly blend. That's probably pre-shrunk. It's not going to really shrink.

That's like $27. That's not $19.99. Nice. So keep that in consideration. Wow. Okay, so I make a movie series I don't make them Jack Ettinger is my editor and director

but I help produce and get it all together and it comes out of my pocket called the Wrestling Road Diaries it's a documentary about the world of professional wrestling independent professional wrestling this one's called Wrestling Road Diaries 3 funny equals money and I'm a comedic pro wrestler I'm a comedic pro wrestler alright that'm a comedic pro wrestler, all right?

That's what I tell people. Laugh at my wrestling jokes. And this is a documentary I just put out, so I have one of these for everybody. Or not everybody. No, I don't have those. No. No. You buy it. You buy it on the Internet. Coldmerch.com. Okay.

And then this is a thing I've been doing since I've been coming on the internet. Coldmerch.com Okay. And then this is a thing I've been doing since I've been coming on the show. When I was in the early 2000s, I used to get Netflix and you could only get the DVDs and then I would burn them and I would make my own art on the DVDs. Oh my god. It's always a highlight of his visits to this show.

He always parts with a few of these. So I get to, this is Coach Carter and you can see I drew a basketball on it. And then this is Beer League, and I drew a little beer stein and a baseball bat. Those are my prizes. That's nice. I wish Beer League was like just throwing mugs of beer

at somebody who has to hit it with a bat. On my DVD, it kind of is. Oh, okay. Looks like it. Yeah. There you go. Thanks for bringing all that stuff. Pass it down. Lisa, what do you got? Oh, boy. Here we go.

Oh, Lord. Oh, geez. Well, you know, because I feel like I'm not so hot at this game, I always like to really amp it up with my prizes. There's a lot in there. So, first of all, the bag comes with it. Whoa! That's a pretty bag.

You're going to be taking home your goods in style. That's a really sparkly bag right there. So, I'll start with the piece I took from my own collection. I always like to bring something from my own collection. And I know you have a real wildlife-loving audience, so this is a bird feeder. Looks like a deer feeder. Yeah, it kind of combines a lot of woodland needs.

It's got a deer on it. It's got a deer on it. But I wouldn't think a deer would be able to eat out of it. It's hand-painted. I don't a deer on it This is folk art I would say It's hand painted I don't know what size bird can fit in that hole But I just had it on my window unit So

So you just sit and watch sad birds failing to get in there It's good for a laugh Yeah just put the feed just beyond their reach So But then I felt like that's not enough. So then I went for a little, I went for a little shopping trip to, and I just saw so many great things. So I just really, I kind of splurged on you guys. But this, I mean, it's hard to hold.

Can you? Oh, wow. So this, I wanted to take, but I'm going to let you guys have it. It's a t-shirt from the Roswell Alien UFO Festival. And it says Roswell, Mexico. Does it have a list of all the aliens on the back? It's a youth medium. It's a youth medium.

This would be a sweet baby tea on any of you fellas. I like a tight t-shirt on a man where just his belly button's poking out. So this is a great... Another pillow? This is another pillow. Somebody's going to be set for pillows. Yeah, just this one can stack

in front of the other one. It says, I love Harry. Harry Styles? It's got a picture of Harry Styles on it. Who's Harry Styles? That's the guy that's on that pillow. Yeah. It's that guy.

I just thought he was, I was like, just a cute young guy named Harry. And it says I love him. Oh, man. There's a dude out there who loves Harry Styles. Hang on, there's some more. Get the fuck out of that pillow. That feels a little too generic for a pillow, that it's just some guy named Harry.

I feel like I should open a store today. It's not a picture frame. This is a sweet belt. It is. Uh-oh, she's off mic. Hello Kitty. It's a Hello Kitty seatbelt buckle. Check. Here. Oh, wait. She's off mic. Hello Kitty. It's a Hello Kitty seatbelt buckle.

Check. Here. Oh, wait. It's like an extender? No, listen to this. Just listen to this. I'm fat and like Hello Kitty. Sorry, do it again.

Do it again. Okay. Oh. Wow. That was satisfying to listen to. You should maybe look into work as a Foley artist. Or maybe like an hour-long YouTube of just that clicking constantly. I could watch.

People would be into that. Do people wear those as like real belts sometimes? Somebody here today will. Yeah? Damn. I want it. Oh, Brendan's going to put it on. I'm not going to take it from you, the people. It's extendable, so you can really...

But, like, while I have access to it. While you're putting on that belt, while you're cinching your waist. Okay, so then I have two films. Wow. This belt is not... Stand up, you've got to suck it in. You know, I've always thought of myself as a comedian.

Right, ladies? Suck it. That belt's not gonna fit on anybody here. You can extend it. It's like a Michael Jackson move. Because I'm bad. There's a lot of physical comedy going on for a podcast. Sorry, folks at home Yeah this is no fun for them

Well he's putting on It's a Hello Kitty There you go Really makes your shirt into a blouse This is like a lap band now It's a lap band yeah You're strapped in and ready to go for a ride. Yeah, I'm going to hurt myself.

That was creepy. Yeah, that's intense. So this, sorry, the price is still on it. Do you think you can handle your own microphone now? Wow. What a gentleman. That's what she said. What?

Sorry. I got this. What? Sorry. I got this. Okay, okay. Thank you, Copa Cabana. This is the worst QVC audition ever. Not when I tell you I have the digital video disc of The Man

from Uncle starring Hugh Grant. Whoa. Everyone's favorite Hugh Grant film. He's got a supporting role in that one. They're all actors I've never heard of. Oh, yeah, Superman. And then it says, and Hugh Grant. So that's that movie.

That's from the director of Sherlock Holmes. And then this is just a real local, fun VHS tape. And it's Diane Horner country line dancing. Diane Horner. And it says, as seen on TV,

over one million sold. That'd be funny to put out tape, as seen on your TV when you put it in the VCR That's it, that's it That's awesome, that bag I don't know if any of you were at Leprechaun 5 in the hood yesterday

but I can't help mentioning that that bag looks gold to me Whenever gold was mentioned in Leprechaun 5 But I can't help mentioning that that bag looks gold to me. Whenever gold was mentioned in Leprechaun 5, we had to drink and yell out golden showers. They play some sick games in those Master Pancake shows. Very relevant during this administration, you know? Golden showers. The piss thing.

Russia. Trump. Casper mattress showers. The piss thing. Russia. Trump. Casper mattresses. I'm leaving. So go ahead and pass that beautiful gold bag down here. Oh yeah, they want the belt back. Oh yeah. Yeah, you gotta check out that belt.

It's on Brandon. It's still on you. I mean, you can wear it to the end, modeling it. You guys are really motivated to win now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you're going to be like an instant bag person. Wait, so y'all, all of you brought bags?

Yeah, so we can shove your thing into the bag if you do that. Yeah, I guess we can do that. What do you got? Okay, so i designed shorts i just of course you do my friend and do so they are there's these are the shorts justin bieber wore these on vacation once not these specific, but like we only made like 150 of these. It's me and my friend Robeson. It's the, it's my

logo in the corner. It's an iPhone charger. It's his corner. It's his logo in the corner. And then like in like the genital area, it's the verified check from twitter.com. That's pretty hot. Yeah. And then I also just like, there was like a bag of chips that they were giving out of this show.

So I put that in there. Regular flavored. We can just throw that out right now. Regular potato chips. Regular flavored potato chips from Schlotzky's. They're from Schlotzky's. They were sponsoring a comedy show on Thursday. And they're only slightly smushed.

They were in my backpack for a little bit. Everyone knows that's when they're the best, because you can make a casserole. Now someone says it should be called Casserole. Someone says it should be Colt Casserole Cabana. These are all being considered, all right? But hit him up on Twitter

with more suggestions. I think he loves it. It's just like Barbara. It doesn't have to rhyme or anything. Just Colt, Barbara, Cabana. Wait, so when do we find out the middle name? The real one? Yeah.

No, the one he's going to make up. Oh, like we're deciding on it. I'm so fucking lost on the middle name discussion. Like, I thought I thought the way I'm the one that's supposed To be confused About what's happening

I'm the confused host God damn But you're doing great And And a ball Seth what do you got? I Okay

I got some stuff Bring it out Sort of music themed Oh okay I don't know if anyone Is in a Plays guitar here Is in a band What do you got? I got some stuff. Sort of music themed. I don't know if anyone plays guitar here. Is it a band? One person? You've got to be kidding me. One person's in a band?

Yeah. My crowd knows their lane. One of the things I got here is a guitar strap. Wonder Woman guitar strap. Wonder Woman guitar strap. I think that's Weezer. Is it Weezer? I think it's Wonder Woman.

I think it's Weezer. Weezer stole it from Wonder Woman. There's two W's. It's Wonder Woman. Weezer, Weezer. I thought I have an affinity for her Also And I think these should be coming back to style

And I think you should be the person who ever wins this To usher these Piano scarves Oh yes Nothing says I know Everything about music than a piano scarf Did you go to Spencer's Gifts? I did, in 1983

I'd like to see one of those piano playing cats Play that piano until the cat scratches you to death That'd be a good viral sensation And then for fun with friends I got some outcast Mad Libs That's always fun That'd be a good viral sensation. And then for fun with friends, I got some OutKast Mad Libs. Oh! That's always fun. Chalice!

Give them the sample on the back. We were looking at this backstage. This is how they think you should play it. Hey-ya! The new OutKast pencil sharpener is even more impressive than Miss Jackson's pepperoni pizza. Nice noun. And then it says, obviously you've been playing Outkast Mad Libs.

So those are the hilarious answers. That's how fun it can get. That's how fun it can get. Like his, why would she make pepperoni pizza? Shake it like a pepperoni pizza. He was saying, I'm sorry, Miss Jackson, because he ate all her pepperoni pizza. We never got the backstory on that.

That's why her daughter was crying. I tried to sing it, but it went bad fast. Try to eat each slice of peppy pie. Yes! Yes! Give Doug two seconds to catch up, he'll do it. I just figured out that rappers have to figure out how many syllables they're working with. Give Doug two seconds to catch up, he'll do it I just figured out that rappers have to figure out

How many syllables they're working with Just like Shakespeare Alright, so All of that That's probably the longest prize bag Talk ever But all of that is going to go home With somebody

Somebody this evening at approximately 6 p.m. Central Time. My apologies if you're on a schedule. 6.30 is when it ends. That guy's like, I gotta go. Thanks for coming, dude. I'm going to have to ask you to leave. What are you going to check out next?

You're a photographer? Oh, awesome. Thanks for coming by for a little bit of this show. That's cool. He's probably already taken my picture this week because I've been on the red carpet. Where is he going? Life? Yeah, there's a movie called Life It's over at the Zack

And it stars Ryan Reynolds And How many times do I have to tell you not to say the answers? I didn't realize it was a movie I set you guys up for that one But I also didn't remember But he is my favorite I didn't realize it was a movie. I set you guys up for that one, but I also didn't remember Jay Gyllenhaal's in it. But he is my favorite.

I didn't realize it was a movie. He's like, I'm going to the red carpet of life. I was like, what kind of metaphor is that? Oh shit, they used to say kick the bucket, but now they say

walk in the red carpet of life. I was like, is that a weird way to say he's about to commit suicide? Tell us, that's a weird way to tell us. There's a light in your family at the end of the red carpet. Weaving you in.

That just got dark in here. It did. But that's cool. That guy came by. Didn't take a single picture. It felt like he was leaving for something important. Because I don't know what his workout schedule's like, but those were a lot of steps he had to walk up.

What? That's just mean. You guys don't have the ability to laugh at someone who's no longer in the room? I love how you're all like yeah that's your hole Doug that's your hole you Doug you just dig Doug I think when you're fat

you can make fun of fatness it's just my take on it I think when you're fat, you can make fun of fatness. It's just my take on it. Here's a part of the show where, you know, the newly thin Bert Kreischer turns it off because I'm about to say... One more question for the panel. Colt? Yeah.

Got ahead of myself there. I was going to say something, but I didn't want to be that guy. What was the last movie you saw? On the plane, I watched... And I only remembered it because I just looked it up on my phone while you guys were doing that extremely long prize bag. I watched Hateship Loveship, which was with Kristen Wiig.

And I feel that she tricks me into watching all these movies. Because I just think it's going to be like this hilarious movie. And it was like a real movie. With like real feelings. I thought it was for adults. She's done a few of those. Yeah, she likes to weave in those dramas. And those comedies that are kind of dark.

You know. Like the Spider Sisters. The Skeleton Key? Skeleton Twins. Skeleton Twins. I was trying to have fun with the title. You were really trying to figure it out. I thought Spider Sisters was a real thing.

I was like, I haven't seen that, but I've seen the Skeleton Key, friends. But even though you got tricked into watching it, it was a rewarding experience? Yeah. Kept my attention and it was, she's really good at that, which is kind of cool as I know her from SNL,

being a comedy person. It's quite a compliment to say that a movie you were watching on a plane, you know, you didn't walk out. Yeah. Kept me right there

in my seat because the seatbelt light was on the whole flight. A lot of turbulence. A lot of drama in the movie. A lot of turbulence in the plane. Tetris was a home button away. It really was. I stuck with it. I stuck with it.

It was cool. All right. Lisa, have you seen any movies lately? Yes. In fact, I just saw John Wick 2 at the drive-in at the drive-in only way to see that well is it a double feature or did you just leave after john wick 2 i left after john wick 2 chapter 2 it was late it was uh oh is it john wick chapter 2 you get sleepy reading a good book at the drive-in thank Thank you. You're welcome.

I mean, I've never seen John Wick number one. I know, I know. You guys are so... I mean, I didn't really want to see John Wick 2, but it was either that or the Lego movie. Oh, the Lego Batman movie. I mean, do you guys like John Wick? Yeah, the Lego Batman movie. You are tearing down my world right now. I know, do you guys like John Wick? Yeah, the Lego Batman movie. You are tearing down

my world right now. I know, I know. Those are my two favorite movies this year. Two of my favorites. Well, I kind of was watching the Lego movie when I got tired of reading John Wick 2. But, it was, because you can see the different screens.

There's a drive-in out in New Braunfels. It's really cool. It's like 45 minutes south of here. There's a New Braunfels? There's a New Braunfels! But you got through it okay? Or you thought it was too violent? Or what's your issue with it? I kind of felt like the

whole movie, I was just watching somebody else play a video game on a big screen. That's what it felt like. That's what I like about it. And I also... Did you like it? Did you enjoy it? You guys liked it? Alright. I feel like the script must be like, just

all onomatopoeias. Just... Yeah, I bet you they didn't write those down. I would love to write those down. I bet you they didn't write those down. I would love to write those down. I bet you they improvised those on set. Only the script from the Batman TV series wrote those out. And Lego Batman!

All right, I'll see that one next time. Let me tell you this. To make the experience complete Go see Lego Batman And then watch John Wick 2 Whenever you're bored with that And so you get like the full Both sides experience Okay I'll do that

And probably won't like either movie I don't know Because you're an adult person I like movies that are made for children I wouldn't go that far Well okay Fart Sorry

See Brandon what do you got? I didn't like out. Fart. Fart. Sorry. See? Brandon, what do you got? I didn't like that she was talking down on Lego Batman. I thought Lego Batman was very good. But, you know, we know she hasn't seen it, so it's okay. Get out?

Perfect. It's my podcast, Brandon, and I will stay right here. It's my podcast, Brandon, and I will stay right here. I watched The Big Sick this week. It was really good. You saw that here. Yeah, I saw that. You were part of the audience that helped give it an award. Yeah.

Did you vote on your way out? Would you give it a five? I would give it a five, but I didn't vote, and I felt bad. But it won, right? It won anyway, yeah. Yeah, so voting doesn't matter, right? Is that the takeaway? That's the lesson you got.

That's the takeaway. Take that home with you. Yeah, so great. I laughed, and I cried. No, no, it's really good. Yeah. Yeah. The Big Sick, I think it's out in June I'm very excited to see it New York, Chicago, and LA are going to get it first

Oh my god Then it will spread Like a virus? I was going to say cancer, but that's probably better Cold Cancer Cabana. Yeah. I think you nailed it, Colt. Film-wise?

What? What? Yeah, what was the last movie you saw? I watched a documentary on HBO. Tickle. Has anyone seen Tickle? Oh, shit. Here we go.

Have you seen it? This damn movie. I have not seen it. It's pretty great. So good. And everybody that comes on wants to ruin it more. Well, I don't want to say

anything. I think Cole's the first person that may have mentioned it on this show, maybe. Well, Cole, were you in it? It's kind of... It's weirdly... I relate it

because it's weirdly a world that I kind of know a little bit about. I know it is. You must know some of the guys in it because it's weirdly a world that I kind of know a little bit about. I know it is. You must know some of the guys in it, maybe. There was a wrestling thing called Cyberfights years ago that I wasn't good enough looking to be in. I was kind of sad by it.

It was all the cute little hot wrestler dudes, and they were like, you're a little too chubby, Colt. I was like, aw. It was all just twink wrestlers? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hell yeah. So that's... Sick. It was all just like twink wrestlers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hell yeah.

Sick. So this reminded me a lot of this. I don't know what you guys know about it, but it's a sort of weird accidental look into these competitive tickling videos in the dark world that makes them. And it gets, basically these New Zealand... People say it's twisty, and then I always have to stop them

from talking anymore about it. Because, you know, don't you think the less you know about this, 100%, I knew zero about it before I watched it, and I loved it, zero. I'm going to tell you my movie that I just saw today, I'm going to tell you

to not listen to a word anybody has to say about it if you want to just have, at worst, an interesting experience. You might have to leave the theater at some point. I've said too much already. It's called Most Beautiful Island. Okay. And, right?

It's a movie you can't, anything you say about it ruins it. Like, the little description that South By had was just like, a woman comes to New York and tries to make her way and make some bad decisions, or something like that. And I was like, okay, that sounds all right.

And then now I know that knowing anything more than that ruins this movie. There's one word I could say that would be a great middle name for Colt. That if I said it out loud, it ruins the movie. It absolutely ruins it. I'm not gonna, don't panic.

Plus also, this is a movie you never heard of until I just started talking about it. But it won an award here. Best narrative audience award for narrative feature. Or no, it won an award here, Best Narrative Audience Award for Narrative Feature. Or no, it won the Grand Jury Award for Narrative Feature. And it's a real interesting experience. Most beautiful island, and it should show up in theaters eventually.

Doug, a friend of mine saw it, and he compared it to Hostel. I was like, ew. Right. That's, I can't even say whether that's accurate or not. Okay, okay. So there might be some torture. Do you have to sign like a waiver

when you leave the theater not to say anything? No, but I just feel like there's, it's one of those movies where there's no reason to watch it if you know, you know, if you have any idea what's going to happen. Like it's one of those movies where there's no reason to watch it if you know, you know, if you have any idea what's going to happen. Like, it's one of those movies where the whole point of it is the entire time you're like,

what is fucking going on here? And then you're like, that's what's going on? That's all we needed to hear. Was that Burt Kreischer? What was that? Yeah, yeah. I can't believe what's going on! Is Manhattan the island? Yes. sure what was that. I can't believe what's going on! Ah!

Is Manhattan the island? Yes. Oh, Seth. Good work. Four more questions. I'm kidding. Although, actually, for those who have seen it, you can watch the whole thing and go, oh, yeah, I guess that's the island. Damn it. It takes place there,

but it could be someplace else. All right. Roosevelt Island? Sorry. Is New York the real star of the movie? No, the real star is a... Don't say it, Doug! Now, this is the part where I say

Let the games begin Yeah Lisa, so I don't torture you anymore with this I'm the voice of Bane In Lego Batman Oh Well if I'd known that I would've definitely chosen that Oh. Well, if I'd known that, I would have definitely chosen that.

No, I'm also one of the guns in John Wick 2. Wait, what? I'm one of the guns in John Wick 2. I'm having a great year. That part I liked, actually. Things are going great. All right, so lots of folks brought awesome name tags to the event today here at the stateside each of you has to select somebody like to play for be careful with the steps over here but get

up from your seat and go choose a name tag and then bring it back and while you do that we'll do this. We'll be right back after these messages spoken by me. Just one message. We'll be right back. Hey, today's episode is brought to you by good friends at Audible. Do you love books but find that you never

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that's Doug to start now. Back to the show. Alright, cool. We are back and Lisa went out there and grabbed the apple of my eye. It's the Nick's Die Hard poster.

It's pretty sweet. I like when anyone uses glue for their... Yeah, it's a real art project, and from the back, I couldn't describe it. There's a foot and glass and blood coming out of the foot. Well, oh, that's great. Yeah, there's a... Nick, this is your... That's his name. His name's a little sparkly.

Nick Diehard. Nick Diehard. And then his shirt says, Now I have a machine gun. Ho, ho, ho. I don't know what... Do you know the movie Diehard? I mean yeah It's where Santa Claus cuts up people's feet

Lisa I played the sweater in that movie and Weezer sings the sweater song over the end That was vintage Doug Alright what do you got there Colt? I have Donica Darkco which is that movie with um what's his fucking name yay and uh i picked it because my friend stew stone was one of the uh one of that guy's friends and he dressed up like hulk hogan in the halloween

scene because he's a huge wrestling fan, and he made that decision by himself, and he's very proud of it, and I wanted to share it with the world. There's pictures of Kumail, Al Madrigal, and two girls I don't know, and Doug. All great guesses of who's going to be here today. Yeah.

I like to keep everybody guessing. Wait, there's two girls. Is that both you guys? Noelle Wells is on there, the director of Miss Roosevelt. Are you Noelle Wells? Who's Noelle Wells? Noelle Wells, she's directed Mr. Roosevelt. She was just on this podcast recently. Master of None.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Saturday Night Live for one year. Oh, that was real. I thought that was a callback to Kristen Wiig. Sorry. Okay, great. Thanks for coming by, Colt. By the way,

once every couple weeks, somebody tells me I look like Donnie Darko. What does that mean? Somebody was just like, somebody just yelled, no. I don't know. It's people on the internet. I don't, you know. He wears glasses like yours? I don't know. It's people on the internet. I don't, you know. He wears glasses like yours?

I don't always wear glasses. Okay, when the glasses are off, you look even less like him to me. Yeah, it's, I don't know. Do they mean the rabbit version? I've never watched Donnie Darko. But why, do they ever say any other Gyllenhaal movie? That's literally the only Gyllenhaal movie. So he must just wear his hair similar to yours.

Yeah, because that's the thing. People are never like, oh, you look like Jake Gyllenhaal. They're always like, oh, you look like Donnie Darko. People say to me, you look like the rabbit in Donnie Darko. And I do not take that well. Brandon, you kind of look like Bubble Boy.

Wait, okay. I don't know. John Travolta? John Travolta? No, you guys sort of look like every movie where Jake Gyllenhaal Wait, okay. John Travolta? No one gets that but us. No one gets that but us. I was actually not joking. Not to get too serious on everybody, but have you guys heard about this thing

that's going around here at South By, this virus where you spring pink pubic hair just suddenly out of nowhere? It's not dangerous, but it's just tons of pink pubic hair. suddenly out of nowhere. It's not dangerous, but it's just tons of pink pubic hair. You know what's funny? I heard about this. I heard about this. Like it comes through your pants desperately trying not to catch it.

No, you got it, buddy. Damn it. What the hell is that? You just took a wig off a clown as a name tag? No, it's just I have an issue and I need some scissors. No, Yassine in the audience

didn't have a name, like a poster. He just had a funny wig and I was like, you know what? That's a lazy guy, but an interesting prop. I had a lot of fun with it. Yeah. The whole virus bit. Yeah, right? It worked.

Yeah, but you ruined it, because now people clearly know it's just a wig from Yassim. Yeah. Oh, he's saying his afro makes it hard for him to wear that wig. Oh, you can't wear this wig because you have too much real hair? Yeah. Or when you take off the wig, people are like, that's the same thing. Why would you even bother wearing a wig? It's the same thing.

That's a funny bit. The comedian does. All right, so. Is MMFA when you want to hook up with a male, male, female, an Asian? Oh, it's from the movie MFA. There you go. Gotcha. It's an afro. His hair's an afro. Not so lazy after all. Gotcha. It's an afro.

His hair's an afro. Not so lazy after all. You can't pull an afro. A lot of force. But your name's not even on here. But you could have just put your name on it. Like taped it. That is a good point.

Yeah. I mean, I do feel like when I was looking, I felt bad picking one cause like people work so hard on them and then this guy fucking brought a pink wig there were people spending like a whole night like on photoshop

I wanna impress Doug I gotta fucking like get on photoshop no I can't go out I gotta impress Doug on photoshop And this guy fucking brought a pink wig. That he bought on the way here. I'm sorry, but Nick went to Hobby Lobby.

If this were an episode of Friends, it'd be called The One Without the Games. Maybe we're just having too much fun. We are. No, that's the truth. I'd force it along if we weren't having fun. So that's your fun prop to have. Just a big pink afro in your lap like you're getting... Don't say that.

Getting blown by a clown, I had to say it. I'm getting very intimate It's pretty obvious With Ronald McDonald right now Gentle Alright so Brandon I skipped you Who are you playing for?

Yes Anna Anna Graham She made a Wait Instead of American Tale It's Anna Graham Tale It's Anna Graham Tale Doug goes south by southwest She made a... Instead of an American tale, it's an Anagram tale. It's an Anagram tale.

Doug goes south by southwest. Yeah, because Fievel went west, you know. Right. It's like Fievel goes west. It's very cute. It's a cute poster. Good work. He didn't bring a pink wig.

They got James Franco on there, though. That must have been disappointing. They got James Franco as Tommy Wiseau. A girl can dream. There's James Franco as Tommy Wiseau. Jamie Foxx, he's not coming on my show ever. What's Jamie Foxx doing over here? He's in Baby Driver.

Oh. Which is just like Boss Baby, right? She really made it a South by Southwest themed thing. It's really quite clever. Noel Wells getting some good-ass poster time. Seriously. And then, is that you in the corner? That's you in the corner?

Uh-oh. Are you in any other R.E.M. songs? Yeah. There you go. Okay. There you go. Okay, so... Seriously, you guys, let's play some games. Yay! Remember, Lisa, this first one doesn't matter.

This is called... Argo Fack Yourself. Argo? Argo F Fac Yourself. Argo? Argo Fac Yourself, yeah. And it's a frequently asked questions section on a lot of movies on the IMDB page that you can access on their website. Not on the app on the phone. You've got to go all deep into the website. But it works.

on the app on the phone, you got to go all deep into the website, but it works. Sometimes it'll say, there are no frequently asked questions, which, you know, that's sad. They got rid of the message boards, right? Oh, did they? Yeah.

That's a great move. I mean, yeah, people were wild on there. They're terrible. And then like, if the first thing on your thing is terrible, I've already talked about this. Anyway, so. Bunch of cyber clutter.

Yeah. I had a misunderstanding with a lady on there, and she decided to be really mad about it. Did you respond, like, on IMDB? No, because don't you have to, like, to make the comments, don't you also have to sign up or something? Yeah, I thought that you maybe signed up. No.

I thought it was set up for a... I've done that on a couple of message boards in my life, and it never makes you feel better. It's better to just read it and just be like, and then go do something fun. Just do something fun with your life. But what was the point I was trying to make? Argo, fact yourself.

Oh, Argo, fact yourself. So, frequently asked questions. I'll start reading some from one famous movie. One hopefully known movie. And just jump in and guess titles of movies until the first person who gets it right

is the winner of the game. So you're going to say the actors' names? No, he's going to say the frequently asked questions section on the IMDb page. Thank you. I literally didn't know if you were confused or not. I really was. Now I got it. What movie has these frequently asked questions?

Starting with, is Stephanie a lesbian? Full House. That's good. The movie. There is no Full House the movie. If I could give you a half a point, I would. Mean Girls I don't know

Anybody else? I'm just I wish there was like a category on IMDB that I could just like look up of like movies with characters named Stephanie and then I could like look at it on stage right now but I can't That would be sweet.

I can't believe that's so shocking that you thought of one way to use the internet that wouldn't work when in fact just the internet would get you the answer probably. I guess, yeah, I could, right. Yeah. If only I could use... It's not a question IMDB will specifically answer,

but there's some other places I could think of. It might be like, let me help you out, Brandon. Okay, here's the second question. What is Randy's fate at the end of the movie? The wrestler. That is correct. Because I'm a wrestler! There we go.

I'm a pro wrestler! It would have been embarrassing if you didn't get it. I totally teed that one up for Cole, because I thought that would be funny. I feel so good, too! How many times have you seen that film? I'm kind of in the film. When Judah Freelander hands over the flyer,

my name is on the flyer. Don't like to brag. Oh, boy. Is Stephanie a lesbian? Who's Stephanie? All right, and then what happens... I don't want to say what happens to Randy at the end of the movie, but why does Randy have such...

Why does Randy have such problems with the name Robin? That's his... Real name? Okay. And then... Does this film portray wrestling as fake or real? Oh.

Oh, you mean a 60-year-old wrestler working at a deli counter? So real. And Todd Berry yelling at him? Sounds about right. Alright, well that's awesome. You won the first game cold. I don't have to do anything after this. Pressure is off.

Lisa, you're next. Okay. We're going to play Ron Bennington's Adjusted for Inflation Bureau game. And that's a box office mojo gives me the answers for this. So blame them if anything sounds incorrect. They take actors and they will tell you, they'll list their movies in the order of how much money they made

after adjusting for inflation. So they really figure it out and come up with a list, so it's a little hard to guess. But the idea is I'll tell you the name of an actor we'll start with colt and then we'll just work towards me and each one of you gets to guess one movie that that actor was in and if it's in that actor's top three after uh inflation adjustment you will get either three points for number one two points for number two and one point for number one, two points for number two, and one point for number three. We'll play a few rounds of that. What do you think? Bring it. Fascinating. I feel like this

game would be hard enough without the inflation. Why do we need the inflation? You know what? It really is absolutely, it doesn't change the game much. Good. But it can't. I'll still fuck at it. Because when you get gone with the wind in the mix, look out.

Because people will tell you it made more money than any other movie. After you ingest for inflation. Got it. Me, me, me, me, me. All right, here we go. Colt gets to go first. Just name one movie that you think is in the top three for everybody's favorite. Clive Owen.

I think I know The Transporter. Okay. Is that right? I'm not going to tell you whether that's right or wrong. You're just going to have to live with it. Lisa? Say Transporter 2. A James Bond movie.

All right. Brandon? Who here wants to get some points? Brandon? I don't know Clive Owen movies. I know he's British. Okay, Seth. They call a toilet the loo.

The great thing about this is it's going to get harder, not easier. Fucking shit. Seth? Oh, man. Closer. Okay, that is a Clive Owen movie. That probably didn't do very well. I don't think it did very well. Transporter is not.

His number one, I don't know how big his part is in this, but it's the movie that's made the most money that has him in it, The Bourne Identity. Oh. Yeah. I can't remember him in those movies, but I'm not a fan, really, of those movies.

Love him, though. His number two. What? His number two, Inside Man. Inside Man, the Spike Lee joint. And then number three, filmed in Austin, Sin City. Sin City, yeah. All right.

So nobody got any points. Sin City, yeah. Alright. So, nobody got any points. All I ask is someone get at least one at some point during this game. What happens if no one does? Then we'll play another game

and Colt gets to go first. Nobody can leave the theater until people get points. Yeah. If nobody gets points, we're fucking locking the doors. Sorry. I think there's like a... I think you probably just play a real serious documentary

on this screen while we just sit and continue to play games. Or a World Vision. One of those award winners is playing tonight here, I think. All right, Here we go. And we rotate around here so that everybody gets a chance to go first in this game. Yeah. So, Lisa, you get to go first. Rutger Hauer.

What? Yeah, Rutger Hauer. Rutger Hauer? Yeah, the great Rutger Hauer. The great Rutger Hauer The great Rutger Hauer Just anything that he was in I'm picturing like Like a grandpa

He's up there He probably has grandkids That he maybe doesn't know about Alright, let's move on to Brandon Okay, this is kids that he maybe doesn't know about? I'm... Alright. Let's move on to Brandon. Okay. Okay. This is me.

Okay. You were... Don't. You can't have the audience help you. I mean... She wasn't... She didn't say anything. She's miming shit?

Well... Was she doing a Rutger Hauer mime? You said Rutger Hauer and then she started doing this running motion? Yeah. And so then it was like... I see where she's going with that. As does most of the people here. And most of the people see where but like, then I was like oh, is there a movie called The Runner?

And there's... That's his guess. Alright, Seth. Fuck. Seth, it's your turn. I'm going to say Blade Runner. Blade Runner. No more miming audience members. Right.

Jesus Christ, man. And Colt? I know who he is now, right? I got to say The Running Man. You mean just the dance? We didn't have to. Let's do it. Oh, with Schwarzenegger

and Rutger Howard. I'm just glad somebody got some points because Blade Runner is number three of his top grossing movies. What else was on there? So Seth gets a point.

And number one is Batman Begins. Yeah, he shows up in there and Morgan Freeman gets to, I don't know what the word is, double-cross him or something. And then number two, filmed in Austin, Texas, Sin City.

I get it now. All right, Seth has one point. I get it now. All right, Seth has one point. Here's the third name. We'll start with you, Brandon. Yes. Benicio Del Toro. Was he in something we just listened to?

Anything? You got anything? Just name a Benicio Del Toro movie. You going Sin City? Is he in Sin City? You just have to guess something Is that what you want to guess? Sin City?

Yeah I'm going to say Sin City He was in Closer I think it's Closer Not Closer He's always closing in that movie What do you got Seth? What are you going to go with? Sin City closer. No, he's fucking... Oh, he's always closing in that movie. What do you got, Seth? What are you going to go with?

I said Sin City. He doesn't know why, but he's saying Sin City. He's saying it. I'll say The Usual Suspects. Okay. Colt? Hey, come on. What the hell, man? I won't say that. I bet that was an accident

I'm pretty sure Yeah, a traffic accident? I'm blanking Was he the butler in Mr. Deeds? Okay That's a That's an interesting guess That's just

Just picking a movie that has a character actor in it. Pretty good, right? Yeah. He has a character. All right, Lisa, do you have any? Benicio Del Toro's? Isn't he in No Country for Old Men? Nope.

Okay, so... We're the worst Alright so Brandon picks up a point Because number three in Benicio Del Toro's Top three is Sin City Hell yeah And then number two is the audience member He gets two points for yelling out in traffic

Please don't say any more answers. And I'm not just talking to that one guy. Somebody yells out later, he didn't say anything to me about it. I'm just complaining about that other guy. And then, number one, I'm sad, kind of, that this didn't

get picked, didn't get mentioned. Popped right into my brain. Guardians of the Galaxy. where he plays the collector. And guess what? Usual Suspects, because that movie grew over time. It didn't necessarily have a great box office. It's his ninth highest after Adjusting for Inflation. Is that just theatrical?

Release only? It's basically, yeah, the run in theaters. But they do re-releases And, you know, all that shit That movie grossed like $3,000, didn't it? In 1994? Yeah Alright, here we go, you guys Let me check the time real quick

Oh, shit Alright, so let me put a little drama in here This next round of this game might decide the winner today. Oh, Lord. Yeah, right? But we might have a tie, and then we'll do the tiebreaker. Okay. And I'll apologize to the serious documentary they're showing here later.

It is fun to do this in a movie theater. showing here later. It is fun to do this in a movie theater. I don't get to very often, so it's also a... They do everything here. Theater, theater, theater. Like burlesque and stuff? Yeah, they act out the movie burlesque. They should. What about competitive

tickling? They could do that on the stage. How. What about competitive tickling? They could do that on the stage. Wait, how do you win competitive tickling? Don't say it. I guess we all win, you know? Yeah, the winner is the person who likes being prodded without being able to enjoy it. Because the idea is you don't laugh.

How long can you be tickled without laughing? So whoever laughs loses? Yeah, but there's more to this movie than that. And that's why I shut down the conversation about it. Because I don't know what it is yet. I don't know if the ticklers see dead people. It's not that. Does pee-pee come into it?

Very little pee-pee. But I bet it happens. People pee themselves when they get tickled all the time. Call that a spurt. I saw a drunk guy peeing in an alley here at South By and I ran up and tickled him

just so it looked more natural. And then he pooped. I was like, oh, he's peeing because that comedian's tickling him. That's why he's peeing. Did he just continue peeing? In this made-up story? Sure.

Okay, here we go. This is for all the marbles. Do you like that movie, Colt? All the marbles? With Benicio Del Toro? Marvel Madness, I played that as a kid. It's about lady wrestlers being managed by Columbo. Really?

Mm-hmm. Columbo the detective? Mm-hmm. I just didn't think you guys would know who Peter Falk was. Oh, right, Peter Falk. Oh, right. All right, here we go. The name, I'm going to start with you, Seth.

My Lord. The name is Josh Hartnett. Mm-hmm. Okay. What do you want to go with what am I going to do with him name what movie you think is in his top three oh in terms of money yeah

no how many likes did it get on social media it Josh Hartnett Pearl Harbor How many likes did it get on social media? It, Josh Hartnett. Pearl Harbor. Okay. Thank you for the applause. It's a smart guess.

Let's go to Colt. The city that I live in, Wicker Park. Screw you! I don't know. People aren't sad that you live in Wicker Park. They're sad that you picked that movie as a top grossing thing. They just hate that movie. Yeah.

Lisa, do you know who Josh Hartnett is? I feel like he's kind of hunky, maybe. Uh-huh. Is he like a heartthrob? A little bit, yeah. What movie did you say, Seth? Pearl Harbor. Mmm.

Remember that? Remember that chestnut from 98? I love a war movie. You know, he doesn't have a huge career, but I'd say he's been in at least 11 movies. Ah. Ah. Ocean's Eleven.

Ocean's Eleven. Ah. Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is too fun. I think I found a new direction for this show. Bring people on who know nothing about movies. They just torture them the entire time.

Doug, do you remember when I guessed Waterworld? That's never a bad guess, because Jack Black is in it. I didn't know Jack Black was in it. It was an accident. And that was what I was... A black's in it, so... What? A black... Brandon?

Okay, so... Wait, remember that movie where he couldn't cum during Lent? Yeah, I do. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I know it. Very biblical.

Yeah, 40 Days and 40 Nights. There you go. Yeah. Or, but, should that be my, can I just, like, talk about that movie and then just, I talked about it. I'm not like, oh, can I talk about it now? But like, can I have a different guess? I'll just have that as my guess. Fuck it. I'm sorry. That's a weird

request. Alright. Why does he get cheered for shitty movie 40 days and I get booed for Wicker Bar? I don't know. Watch both movies? That doesn't matter. It's the gross. After inflation. All right. Very exciting finish here.

Because nobody took my Sin City bait. He's in Sin City. Thank you for trying. But it was number four. So somebody went for it, and I went, nope, sorry. But coming in at number three, Halloween H20. He was in that one where they used water to kill Michael Myers. And then number

two for him, this is a good one, Black Hawk Down. Yeah, he was one of those. I was going to say Black Hawk Down, and then he said Pearl Harbor, and then I was like, oh, he's not in Black Hawk Down, he's in Pearl Harbor, but he's in fucking both. No, he is in Black Hawk Down. And so then I said 40 Days, 40 Nights,

the movie where he doesn't come. And I know that that's Days, 40 Nights, the movie where he doesn't come. And I know that that's not number one. I know another movie where he didn't come. Pearl Harbor is number one. Seth Herzog gets three points for a total of four, and he is our winner. Oh, wig guy, wig guy.

You can't keep the pink people down. How do you say Yassine? Yassine? Have you seen that movie? That's your name? Yassine. No! I met him outside.

Oh, you should catch up later. So Yassine... Yassine, could you mind coming down here and getting all your prizes? I'm sorry, Nick. Good work. Wow. Yassine, you did it. You really did it.

You brought a terrible sign, and you won. No, you did a great job bringing this. You don't apologize for yourself. You got some sweet lids. Do I give't apologize for yourself. You got some sweet wig. Do I give him his wig back? Yeah, it's good. Do I get to keep the wig? Go ahead.

Because he needs something to wear at the Roots show tonight. I needed a wardrobe for the show. He really wants to fit in. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you got to. That Hello Kitty belt would look cute with that wig, though. Yeah, that would go well together. But congratulations, Justine.

Congratulations, Justine. All right, real quick, you guys, because we only got like three minutes left. Let's go through and do some plugs. What do you got to plug, Seth Herzog? Well, you know, I do my normal Tuesday night economy show in New York's city. Sweet. Every Tuesday at the Slipper Room. Classic show. Great show. Yeah. Brandon's done it a bunch of times.

Great show. And what else? That's about it for now. Oh, I'm doing Will's Pub in Orlando. I think that's also on a Tuesday, like April 5th, or no, 4th, something like that. Okay. Thank you very much.

Brandon Wardell, what do you got going on? I'm in Cleveland on 420. Hey, you guys smoke kush? Hilarities. And then I'm at Helium in Portland on the 25th. It is a gas. I'm at Brown University on April 8th. Just go to my website on Lime.

Google Brandon Wardell and then just go from there, I guess. Yeah, get into it. Find out everything about him. Yeah. Lisa Delarios! Well, I'm a comedian here in Austin, and so I'm out and about. And I'll be doing shows at Moon Tower,

so that's exciting. I don't know which ones, and I am on Instagram, and I do put a lot of pictures of my dogs and the occasional hedgehog and chinchilla. All right. Lovely.

Cold Cabana. Twitter and Instagram at Cold Cabana. My Wrestling Road Diaries documentary series. It's a new one. It dissects comedy and wrestling. I have a podcast, The Art of Wrestling. Also,

I'm a traveling wrestler. I'm on the road about 200 days a year. In the next couple of weeks, I'll be in Cleveland, Windsor, Ontario, London, Ontario, Orlando, Cape Breton, Canada, St. Louis, Chicago, and Clive, Iowa? Is that a thing?

Clive Owens, Iowa. And all my appearances are at ColtCabana.com. Thank you. Alright. I will try my best to come to one of those places that you're doing your wrestling come see you and then you can uh we'll you know have you back on this show if that if we can work out the timing perfect i love it um i'm gonna be uh at doing getting doug with high live on april 20th at the coach house in San Juan Capistrano and of course

DouglasMovies.com for all of my stuff and thank you to South By and the staff here at the Stateside Theater and one more time for Cole Cabana Lisa Delarios, Brandon Wardell and Seth Herzog Doug Benson

everybody Doug Benson, everybody! And as always, as always, the shitheads are very interesting here in Austin, Texas. The lines at Alamo... The lines at Alamo South Lamar are a shithead. I don't know if that's a South by thing or just all the time. 2016 is a shithead.

Oh, yeah. And probably my favorite of them all, if I had to pick a favorite. White supremacy is a shithead. white supremacy is a shithead. Play that closing theme.