Doug Loves Movies - Brendon Walsh, Dan Telfer, and Steve Archer Guest

Episode Date: April 28, 2012

Live from Zanies Comedy Club in Chicago, Doug welcomes comedians Brendon Walsh and Dan Telfer to the show, along with audience winner Steve Archer.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers screaming baby stickies He sleeps with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't sleep of Doug loves movies Hey everybody! Hey, everybody. My name is Doug. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies, coming to you from Zanies Comedy Club

in Chicago, Illinois, on Sunday, April 29th to Oceans 12. Yeah. We did it. We're here. Since last I spoke, you listened. I attended Roger Ebert's Ebert Fest at the Virginia Theater in Champaign-Urbana. And, yeah. Did you guys go to it?

No. It's out there. It's a train ride away. I enjoyed all of the movies that Mr. Ebert chose and look forward to going again next year, hopefully. I saw Patton Oswalt in The Great Overlooked, big fan. I saw Terry featuring the always amazing John C. Reilly. I saw the incredibly involving Academy Award winner for Best Foreign Film from Iran called A Separation.

Yeah. I don't know if that movie's really the kind of movie where you go, Woo! Separation, yeah! Yeah! As Pete Holmes would say, as T.J. Miller. Separation, yeah! People are going to see the listing for this show and see that those guys aren't listed,

and they're going to be like, oh, finally a show without any yelling. And I pick up the mantle and do it anyway. Yeah! Where was I? Oh, A Separation, which is a movie that really taught me some lessons.

Like, never get married or separated. And the one movie that was worth the entire trip to go out to the Ebert Fest, a movie I've always loved, Joe vs. the Volcano. Yeah. In a theater with 1,600 people who laughed a lot and I assume were as moved by it as I was.

So it's a really good movie. It gets better every time I see it, but it's not for everybody. Some people are like, that's silly and weird. I'll be back next year, Roger. He doesn't listen to this. Now it's time for Tweet Relief, tweets about movies.

Atelsmucho on Twitter wrote, I need to see the new dark shadows in IMAX like I need to see my own hemorrhoids in IMAX. This has been Tweet Relief, tweets about movies. From the... Hold your applause until the very

end. From the corrections department, director John Irvin is alive and making movies. I called him dead on a recent show. I don't know if it was in a car or on a stage, but I said it and people pointed out to me that I was wrong.

I'll be at the Zany's in Nashville, Tennessee on May 26th, 27th, and 28th, and each day at 4.20. Stand-up on Saturday and Sunday, and then Douglas Movies on Monday. And if you come to the stand-up shows, you can win a seat in then Douglas Movies on Monday and if you come to the stand up shows you can win a seat in the Douglas Movies show on Monday

which falls on Memorial Day now it's time for Watch This Not That yeah new style version slightly different version you sir, what is your favorite movie of all time? Back to the Future

alright people are already judging what is your favorite movie of all time? Back to the Future. Alright. People are already judging. Hmm. Alright. How about you, young lady? What movie do you like? The Notebook.

She even said it like, I know where this is going. The Notebook. Yeah, sometimes people make it too easy for me. Watch Back to the Future, not the notebook. This has been Watch This, Not That. Some of y'all

have a harder choice to make. I love the ads for what's this one now? The Lucky One with Zac Efron. Have you seen that one? No, she hasn't seen that one. The ads say it's the best Nicholas Sparks movie since The Notebook.

And what has there been since The Notebook? Two of them? Two Nicholas Sparks movies? And then now Lucky One is the best one since. And they still didn't say it's better than The Notebook. That to me is the only way you'd even remotely get my interest. If you said, has more action than the notebook, would be a good thing to say.

Less old people with Alzheimer's than the notebook. Less lead actor standing around with his shirt off than the notebook. All right, let's look at the prize bag, you guys. Yeah. First of all, look at this. Custom-made, dropped off at the show by someone who didn't even get a ticket because this show sold out really fast, and you guys, you all jumped on it. So I'm very proud of you. But this guy was nice enough to bring a bunch of bags that say Doug Loves Movies and have a,

I'm not crazy about how I look. Especially in my, it looks like I have one of those huge, like, you know, what would you call it, like a ball belly? But it does say Douglas Movies prize bag, and Douglas Movies is coming out like I'm smoking something, but I'm not holding anything, so... That's what my life has come to, is smoke comes out of me when I'm just walking around. Look at that guy.

Smoke is coming out of him. Is he tired? But this is what, this is, I gotta read the card that he included, because it was so nice of him to do this. He gave me a bunch of bags, and then he also gave me, and I included it in this bag, one of several comic books

that he does, and I'll explain it to you right now when I read this. Doug, hey, I'm a big fan of the podcast. I listen while I paint and make comics, and I'm amazing at building a title. Now, first of all, everyone fucking thinks they're amazing at it, but when you're sitting up here, it's really hard, and it's super extra hard if you're driving a rental car.

My collaborative comics group, Trouble Club, that's what the comic's called, Trouble Club, would like you to have five copies of our fifth issue to throw out as prizes on your podcast. I think you will like them, and I think your audience will too. Well, you know, doesn't matter if they like them or not. It's the thought that counts. Then he says, these are jam comics, kind of like improv.

A different person writes and draws each panel of any given strip. So that's kind of a cool idea. There's a signed and numbered silkscreen print with each issue, as well as stickers, Trouble Club stickers. Also, my friend Carrie and I made these bags for you since you recently said on a podcast that the prize bag was just a pile. I didn't have a bag one week, you know. I always have to use a bag.

So now I've got five of these, so for the next few weeks, people will be getting these on the show. And thank you to Carrie and to Jeremy. And, yeah. Who, like I said, they didn't even get in for the show, so that's extra super nice.

All right, what else is in here? There's some good stuff in here, you guys. I brought a copy of a documentary called Sweethearts of the Prison Rodeo. If you haven't seen it, it's very entertaining, because it's all about women who are in prison but learn rodeo because that's more fun than working in the kitchen or the laundry or whatever also brought by a guest two classic movies the evil dead and die hard 2 both on both on dvd another guest brought uh just a fistful of fake money. $20 bills.

Y'all. I included a snack from my hotel room, rolled gold pretzels. And I think there's another snack in here as well, maybe. No? I kept the rest. I thought I put a Snickers bar in here. Yeah, there's a Snickers bar in here. And someone recently wrote to me somewhere

or wrote on a message board that they thought the prize bag part was boring to listen to. And I was like, well, we've got to tell people what's in the prize bag. Sorry, it's boring. My first CD, Professional Humoridian, ad by my friend sleeper agent called celebration and a drink cozy that says moon tower comedy festival on it that was one of my guests just came from the moon tower comedy festival in austin texas moon tower comedy festival bottle opener and this this weird bag of things that we're going to talk about

when he gets out here because I don't know how to explain it. Moon Tower Comedy Festival condom. That's pretty smart at a comedy festival to give those out because the comics are all prowling the town with their diseases. Oh, also, Jeremy

and Carrie included a pink t-shirt with a weird drawing on it. So that's everything that's in the prize bag, you guys. Somebody's going to win this tonight. If I can get everything back in the bag in a timely manner. Oh, there went the bottle opener. Thank you, sir. You guys are so helpful.

So what else is going on? You guys are having a nice day? It's a pretty good day in Chicago, right? Just started raining right now, I think. Yeah, so we did it right. Good timing, everybody. Please help me in welcoming to the stage my guests for this evening,

Steve Archer, Dan Telfer, and Brendan Walsh. Here they come. Oh, here comes the stool. There you go. Very good. I threw your microphone on the ground. I'm sorry. Apologize for that.

Do we have enough microphones? Nope. Oh, I was supposed to bring one up with me. There was supposed to be a handheld one in the back that I was supposed to walk up with. I'll just do TJ the whole show. Yeah! Pete TJ.

If somebody could please bring up that other microphone, that'd be... Wow, he's going to go get it himself. Dan Telfer. Dan Telfer. Do-it-yourselfer. Proactive. Dan Telfer, the do-it-yourselfer.

I got a nickname, finally. I love to give out nicknames. Right? The beard? Yeah, yeah. Your most clever one yet. You shaved it up, man. I cleaned it up, yeah. Your shit's tight right now? Yeah, yeah. Your most clever one yet. You shaved it up, man. I cleaned it up, yeah. Your shit's tight right now.

Thanks, dog. You know, I was thinking those bags, too. Conversation starter. If you take them to the grocery store. If you win. Yeah, like, who's that weird guy with the... Who wins, yeah. Who's that guy with the weird...

Sorry. Weird body. The weird shaped body. Oh, it's called a gunt, too. Who's that weird guy with the weird body? The weird shaped body. Oh, it's called a gunt, too. A gunt. Yeah. That's what I'm here for. I teach people horrible new words.

What happened, Dan? I've been informed by the house manager there is not a fourth microphone in the club. In the building anyway. No. Even though that calls and emails went back and forth about, are there five microphones? If you want to ruin my record. Yes, there are five microphones, I was told.

So really, we're going to have to share microphones. Okay. We're going to do this. That didn't happen the last time I was here. Right? You were on the show. I was on the show. Yeah, we had enough microphones to go around.

Yeah, somebody must enough microphones to go around. We did. Yeah, somebody must have stole a microphone. Fantastic. Maybe a lot less cross-talk with less microphones. I think about doing that sometimes with TJ and Pete and Jeff Garland. Just bring them out and say, yeah, we'll give you a microphone when it's your turn to talk.

That's when we'll pass it to you. How loud can you get without a microphone, Steve? Nobody can get, don't ask him that, and then expect him to answer off microphone. Nobody can get loud enough to be heard on the podcast, which is what we're here for. So make sure that, you know, you pass it to him. I just wanted to make a stranger yell.

That's all I was trying to do. Oh, okay. Yell, Steve. What should I yell? I don't think anyone should answer that question. Why didn't you yell? I don't think I should answer it. This is going super well.

Yeah, this is great. This is fantastic. What is this that you brought? Please explain. Okay. Yeah, and keep the microphone. This is a Velcro bag this that you brought? Please explain. Okay. Yeah, keep the microphone. A Velcro bag with a USB drive in it. I recorded an EP for AST Records,

and the uncut version is on here with a little bit of material that got cut from the EP. Who gives a shit, right? But it's on a USB drive. Don't pander to me. I live here. It's on an Alice in Wonderland promotional USB drive that I found on the giveaway desk at my office job. And it's magnetic.

And yeah. And then there's a bunch of buttons with dinosaurs on them. I thought there was more stuff on the drive. Yeah, yeah. What was on the drive? There might be photos. Just your EPs on the drive. Yeah, yeah. What was on the drive? There might be photos. Just your EPs on the drive? I don't want to get fired.

I don't feel like I should say anything else with the word promotional. Oh, there's some promotional stuff from a motion picture that came out. It's a key that I fashioned myself. I welded some pieces of metal together, and then I rubbed it on the computer that had the master

cut of my CD on it. And it might be there if you throw it at your computer. Okay, let me give you a mic that's going to be easier to pass around between the two of you. That was a smooth transition. That was super smooth. Yeah, I'm pretty good at that. Very smooth. Yeah, yeah.

So this one is... Oh, that was Steve, everybody. Oh, he did find another microphone. This is really coming together. Do you guys want to wait 10 minutes, and then we'll start the show? All these things, as soon as I got here, I was asking about all of this, and I was given the assurances.

And then here we are. Setting up still. Hi, Steve. Hi, Doug. You were here on Tuesday night. I was given the assurances. And then here we are. Setting up still. Hi, Steve. Hi, Doug. You were here on Tuesday night. I was. You came to see the show. Yes, great show.

Thank you. It was a stand-up show with me and Dan Telfer. And you made a name tag that was the Evil Dead poster. Yes. Changed to say Steve-el-dead. Yep, that's me, Steve-el-dead. Yeah, yeah. And did I get your name right at the time of the show?

Was it Archer? Absolutely, you got it. Steve Archer? Okay, I remembered that. That's pretty impressive. And, um... So I decided that's my lucky movie and brought it for the prize back. Yes, you brought that and Die Hard 2. Your other lucky movie. Yeah, I couldn't find Die Hard 1. Do you like to...

I was gonna say, I don't know how lucky a movie is. Die Hard 2 has the most depressing first 20 minutes of any action movie. An entire airliner full of people explodes. And then Bruce Willis is like, I got to keep that from happening again. What did you keep it from happening? That's what we want from McClane. I missed out on that one let me get that one

next time I don't remember that I must have only seen that once I don't remember I'm pretty sure that's what happened would With a Vengeance

have been better should 3 have been a better choice is that the one where they drive through the park with Samuel L. Jackson yeah that's the one

with Samuel L. Jackson you made it sound like not an action movie at all is that the movie driving through the park with Sam Jackson isn't he like trying to take Samuel L. Jackson. You made it sound like not an action movie at all. Is that the movie Driving Through the Park with Sam Jackson? Isn't he like

trying to take Miss Daisy to the stove? And they solve puzzles. They do puzzles together. It's really chill. It's like a nice Sunday afternoon. Okay, it doesn't work, you guys.

But thanks for trying. Back to passing. Yeah. That's why it's called Zanies. Has nothing to do with the stand-up comics. But he tried. That's the important thing. That's what really matters.

Yeah, so Steve is here because of winning, and so far is a delightful guest. So let's hear it for Steve Archer, everybody. Doing my best. Oh, that's why you for Steve Archer, everybody. Doing my best. Oh, that's why you said, now I get it, that's why you said Die Hard is your lucky movie because that's the movie that you guessed correctly. You went

negative names, you went negative one names and you took it down in the very first round. You were the only person who got to play. The category was found footage, which is movies where someone goes barefoot. I could feel the resentment coming from the crowd when I got called up. And of course...

And of course, Bruce Willis goes barefoot because some dude sitting next to him on the plane in the beginning of the movie says, oh, a great way to relieve stress is to take your shoes and socks off and curl your toes in the shag carpeting. In a filthy hotel room.

No. Well, that was his recommendation, but he went straight to Nakatomi Plaza. Right. Right? So Argyle took him straight to the Nakatomi. Right. So to see his wife, soon to be ex-wife in the beginning of the story. And so he's in some room that has shag carpeting in Nakatomi Plaza and takes off his shoes and starts doing that. Like that shitty, stupid advice.

Like you would try that right away. Oh, I can't wait to relieve my stress by rubbing my feet in some shag carpeting. Can we stop talking about his feet? And then we have to be, at least it's not Uma Thurman's feet. So seriously, nothing skeeves me out more than when she's trying to make her toe wiggle and kill Bill.

That lady's got some monster feet. She's got big flipper feet. It's almost like a dude just stood in for her on the feet shots. Like she was busy. Oh, I'll just get some guy. Some spider woman from like a carnival freak show.

I think she's sexy. She's a sexy lady, but keep your shoes on. Could you put on these galoshes before I bat you, Miss Thurman? I will not have sex with someone who can play more than one mandolin at the same time. It's a rule we all have.

We're all guys, right? Yeah, unspoken rule. Yeah, I'm sorry I said it. Yeah. The first rule about foot clubs is not talking about foot clubs. All right, Dan. You were across the street doing something at Second City? Yeah, over at Second City. I teach over at Second City.

So I was teaching a class, and I came on over here. What happens to your class when you move out to California? I'm not moving to California. You're not? I thought that was your plan. It was before I got a job here. So I got a job. I was unemployed trying to get a writing job,

and I got a writing job here, so we're all good now. Oh, okay. Who knows in a decade when I accidentally set my office on fire. I love it. It's good to have you here. Hooray. Yeah. You're going to set your office on fire?

What's that? You're going to set your office on fire? I was just trying to find a hard out for talking about my day job. Wasn't hard enough, yeah, yeah. It wasn't hard enough. No, no. I find arson is a good way to end a conversation, though. I use it all the time.

Yeah, just so then I set something on fire. It's the end of every story that you tell. And every friend interaction. Hey, why won't Dan stop talking about arson? If you love somebody, better set them on fire. Dead Milkman, ladies and gentlemen. Metaphysical graffiti, it's a good album. They're kind of playing again. Yeah.

Yeah, I saw them. That's Brendan Walsh talking about something that has nothing to do with movies. Dead Milkman. Yeah, they were good. Do they still? Yeah, they're coming back They are? Yeah yeah

I saw them at a festival Last year I think tall Johnny Schrader Our mutual friend I think he knows Dead Milkman Maybe he does I think he's like buddies

With them Yeah we'll talk about it later But Brandon Walsh Is here everybody And he Yeah Hi everybody I'm Brandon Walsh.

Flown in special. Flown in special. Audience favorite. I love doing the podcast. I love you guys. I just wanted to say. Have you ever gotten an answer right in the Leonard Maltin game? Yeah, yeah. I think you may have. I did. I got

the wrestler with negative two names. Nice. Yeah. That's impressive. Yeah, it's pretty good. What'd you go? Mickey Rourke, Marissa Tomei? Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. No. I thought it was Todd Barry. I know. Todd Barry, Mickey Rourke, Marissa Tomei, I believe, was the proper order. This is a super name-droppy episode. I know. All right. And then we go to Steve

who is here having won the seat yes Brendan I did want to share with everybody I am I lost my cell phone on my way here

so if you see it anywhere no no it's somewhere in Austin it's lost but so when I do my usual shitty job at the Leonard Maltin game

I'm going to blame it on being distracted by my lost cell phone. What? I thought I would get more... No, it's not a joke. Anybody here ever lose your cell phone? It's hard to do anything else or think about anything else but getting your phone back

when that happens. It's almost like losing a baby. It's worse. It's almost as bad. Have you put out an Amber Alert for your phone? Are you putting signs up on street corners? That's funny. I should do that. I don't have a picture of my phone.

You should tweet about it. Put it on Melkart. Just go find a catalog on the internet and take a picture of what your phone looks like. And hang up flyers. Has anybody seen this phone? Yeah, I'll do it. It's going to be on every milk carton in Austin.

That one, that phone. Keep Austin weird. So I was going to ask you, Steve, how long have you been a Douglas Movies listener? My first episode was the John Lithgow episode. Oh, wow. And I never looked back. Interesting place to come into it.

Never looked back, yeah. Because somebody had recommended it to you or something? Somebody had recommended it and said, oh, and he's going to have John Lithgow on. It's going to be amazing. Yeah, go, go, go, Lithgow. Because you'd been wanting to have him on forever. I had been, yeah, but you missed all that buildup.

I did miss the buildup. You just jumped right in. And then jumped right in. So he's got John Lithgow. What's the big deal? I fast forwarded to the end. Very nice. Have you been to the cinema lately?

Most recently I saw Cabin in the Woods. Say no more. Amazing. No spoilers. Nothing else about it. You're absolutely right. There's nothing else to say about it other than it was great. I've got a little, you've said it's too good backlash.

I've got a little bit of that. But, you know, at least the surprises haven't been spoiled. I haven't seen it. I can't wait. It's really great. It made me extra excited for the Avengers. Because I was like, this Whedon-y goodness is only going to continue. Josh Whedon-y goodness.

Josh Whedon-y goodness. Yeah going to continue. Josh Whedon-y goodness. Josh Whedon-y goodness. Yeah, it is a good lead up to that. I'm disappointed in the box office numbers that Cabin in the Woods is doing, but I think part of the problem was that it's hard to promote the movie. Difficult to market, yeah. Yeah, it's difficult to market. It just unfortunately has to look like

a very cliched kind of movie, and then it turns out it's not. So anyway, people will discover it on home video and every chance I get to video, DVD, Blu-ray. Coming soon to Betamax.

Dan Telfer, have you been to the cinema lately? No. Too busy teaching and not moving. I have two kids also. And two kids. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have two kids? I do, yeah.

The last thing I saw was The Innkeepers. That was pretty good. The Innkeepers, just brand spanking new to DVD and Blu-ray itself. Yes. Yeah, it just happened.

And it's a good movie, right? Yes. I really liked it. It's a ghost story where it's very few characters but they're actually interesting characters it's not like one of those found footage movies where you're like i don't give a shit about these people hurry up and knock a chair over ghosts right right right right the hotel is also just fucking spooky as nuts like that whole

bit like that basement it is a spooky nuts basement it is totally it's like the kind of spook that only some nuts can give you moving on to brandon what's that called the innkeeper the innkeepers innkeepers yeah you were so you were at moon tower comedy festival that's where you lost your phone yeah and you probably didn't go see any movies because you were busy doing a festival. Yeah. There weren't many movies playing. I think they showed one. I think they showed Freak Dance, that UCB movie, but I didn't see it.

Yeah, Matt Besser directed that. Amy Poehler's in it. I saw Bully. I was actually going to see Cabin in the Woods, but I walked to a movie theater. I ate a big pot brownie and went for a walk, and the movie theater was way farther than I thought it was going to be. So I

missed the Cabin in the Woods, so I went and saw Bully. What did you do? Walk from downtown over to the South Lamar? No, no, no. This is in Los Angeles where I live. Oh, wait. So where in Los Angeles where I live. Oh, oh, oh. Wait, so where you live,

you didn't know how far away the movie theater was. Well, I decided to walk and I thought it was closer. I just didn't think it would take as long to walk there. Which theater did you walk to?

The Americana in Glendale. I live in Silver Lake, though. Yeah, that's crazy. It's three miles. It is? Yeah. Wow. It's like, that's a long-ass walk. Yeah, it was crazy. It's three miles. It is? Yeah. Wow.

That's a long-ass walk. Yeah, it was a nice day. Three miles. Yeah. And you walked the whole three miles back after? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, that's how I get my exercise. I eat pot, walk to the movies, take a two-hour breather.

Rest your tootsies for a couple hours, take your shoes off, scrunch up your toes in the shag carpeting. We found a microphone! Test check. Yeah! Oh yeah. They built it from scratch. Well, they walked three miles to

another comedy club. Well, as long as it's not as difficult and epic as walking to a comedy club. Well, as long as it's not as difficult and epic as walking to a movie theater. I love doing that. What do you see after the walk? I do that, too. I'll definitely walk

about like a mile or so. I usually, yeah, well, the Vista and the Los Feliz, well, there are two other theaters I go to that's like a half hour walk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what did you end up seeing?

I totally forgot. Bully, bully. Oh, bully. Yeah. Wow, you walked three miles to watchully. Oh, Bully. Yeah. Wow. You walked three miles. Intending to watch children being abused by other children. Yeah. Did you like it?

Yeah, it was okay. It's not a great movie. It's a good subject and an important subject. I thought it had potential to emotionally wreck me. You know, I thought, oh, I might feel... I hesitated before I went and saw it, but I didn't want to see anything else that was playing. And it was fine.

I didn't even get really that sad. You just wish you were more depressed by it. Kind of. You kind of wish the kid who was getting bullied was going blind slowly and had a child to support and worked in a factory and was... Well, just bully him better. Better bullying.

There was some real weak... It was really some half-assed bullying, wasn't it? Yeah. Really hacky stuff from the bullies. Stupid idiot. Stop it!

That's about it. And they had to cut out the swearing to get the PG-13. Did you see it before or after that? Oh, I saw it. Oh, yeah, I see it probably after.

Did they say fuck three times? How many? On the ceiling what i don't remember there's a one kid like counting i didn't know there's a one kid on the street corner bothering another kid and he says fuck a few times like you fucker fuck you i think i heard that yeah yeah so you probably saw the r-rated version because they they had to take the fucks out okay to get the pg 13 but as i was watching it the first time, I was like, why is it

even neat? Just bleep it or whatever. It's like young people is the target audience. So go ahead and take the fucks out of it. There's a lot of kids who've never heard those words before. I know, that's the other thing. Oh my god. This morning I heard a pool full of 30

children screaming fuck at somebody. It was the best time. What did you do? Did you shit in the deep end? Oh, it was great. It was great. It was great. Okay, okay.

I'll try and tell this story as quickly as I can. Time's up. All right. No, I do want to hear it. Okay, so I took my younger daughter to a swim class and half the pool was, it was a hotel pool, half was for the swim class half was just this utter chaos of 30 kids just like shoving each other and jumping off of

this hot tub platform and going nuts and then this mom comes in who's apparently responsible for all 30 of these somehow he goes get out of the pool we're going to church and all the kids went fuck you mom fuck you we're not going and she went get out of this pool right now or I'm going to beat the shit out of you and they all got out of the pool for church even the church kids know we're all going to church with wet bathing suits

if you've never been to church in Skokie I highly recommend it it's a totally different... First go swim in a hotel pool and then go to church. Very important you do that sequence so you can really get the full Skokie. Full Skokie.

I just like that as an expression that I'm going to use from now on. Oh my god, that guy went full Skokie. I just like that as an expression that I'm going to use from now on. Oh my God, that guy went full Skokie on me. There was 30 of us. We thought we had him, but then he said he was going to beat our ass if we didn't get out of the pool. That's crazy.

I didn't say fuck you to my mom when I was a kid. I say it all the time now. I just call her up. Fuck you, mom! Click. My mom is listening to this podcast right now with everyone saying fuck

and getting real disappointed in me. What? Because she knows you're doing it? You. Hi. Has she heard

my podcast before? No. She'll just listen to it because you're on it? Yes, definitely. You didn't have to tell her. Get a friend with GarageBand to bleep that shit for you. She's my Facebook friend. It's an old and terrible

story of friends with parents on Facebook. Everyone knows that story at all. Yeah, I'm lucky. Not a good idea. My mom doesn't know from the internet so I'm very lucky. The additional stuff my mom would know about me if she had internet access

is terrifying. I found out my mom would know about me if she had internet access is terrifying. I found out my mom listens to my podcast, which is fucking... It's absolute filth. It's absolutely three kids in a pool. Thirty kids in a pool. Yeah. It really kind of bummed me out. And you can't make them stop.

God, you can ask nicely. Fucking stop listening, Mom. It's time to fucking go to church. Put on your fucking bathing suit. Right now, my parents are listening to this podcast, and they're really disappointed that I'm not sticking up for parents who listen to their kids' podcasts. It's about time that you did.

I liked it. I learned new words like gunt. You never heard that before? Well, you totally dug your own hole there, buddy. Nobody pimped you into saying cunt. Sorry, Mom. Gunt, gunt, gunt. What is it?

Oh. I clearly said gunt. Clearly said gunt. Steveunt. What is it? Oh. I clearly said gunt. Clearly said gunt. Steve's mom had a heart attack. That was a callback. Callback. What's the G part

of the gunt? The gut. The gut. The gut. Yeah, and I don't know. I get the rest of it. It's a good ring.

But it doesn't... The G is the best part of the cunt just sounds cool I would call that a pants belly too sometimes like when you see

a big fat guy where he just like they just put the belt on wherever and then just when you lose all form and then you got when you lose all form. And then you got that big

gun thing in your jeans. I would call it a pants belly. If only that had been the first term we used we wouldn't have had that C word confusion. Does anyone hunger for games? Yes! May the odds be in your favor. Does anyone hunger for games? Yes. May the odds be in your favor. And your hair be an absurd color.

Maybe we should just have one microphone between us again, Steve. I don't know what that was. I'll be good. You're being good. You're being good. Do any kids have a podcast? Oh, there have to be. There's so many goddamn podcasts now.

I bet there's like a kid. Do you have kids? Yeah, I would never let them. That would be funny. Yeah, give them their own podcast. Two four-year-olds had a podcast? I'd listen to that. Kids, for Christmas, I got you a podcast.

Just swear into microphones for an hour. And then I'll put it on the internet. It would just be my daughter, my older one, singing a broken version of some beautiful child song for 45 minutes straight. And I would love it, but people would

listen to it and just be like, what the fuck is happening? Why does he let his daughter sing for 45 minutes? Is she mentally disabled? She graduates college next year. Like, why can't she get the fucking song right?

I see this guy in the front rows practicing ghost protocol with his hood up and he's asking the same question with his eyes. No, she's four.

Oh, okay. I didn't know four was a cutoff. I'm glad you leapt to mental disability without asking how old she was. Well, you know.

She could have been 22. Let's play Build a Title. Yeah. Let's get fired up. We'll start with our new friend here. We'll start with Steve, and then we'll move to Dan and then to Brendan. Give Brendan time to have his most recent pot brownie wear off.

If I'd have known, we would have walked over. If I'd have known that that was part of your process. Yeah. I was like, no, let's just take a cab. Let's walk. Might rain. All right. Tank Hughes, T-A-N-K Hughes, as in John Hughes of Chicago fame. Tank Hughes suggested not a John Hughes movie, but a James Bond movie called Doctor No.

So, Steve, we need you to come up with a movie that ends with doctor or part of it or begins with no. I'll go with Doctor No Country for Old Men. Nice. No Country for Old Men comes up a lot in this game for some reason. I don't know why, but you did it. I was thinking maybe No Body's Fool might come up. Now we go to Dan. Doctor, No Country for Old Men at Work.

Okay. The classic Emilio Estevez, Charlie Sheen movie. I don't know if I've ever even sat through the whole thing. Brendan, what do you got that ends in doctor or begins with work? I can think of something for both. What's Up, Doctor? No Country for Old Men at both. What's up, doctor? No country for old men. It's right there.

That was my pre-guess. What's up, doctor? What's up, doctor? No comedy. Wait. No comedy. No country. What's up, doctor?

No country for old men at work. Steve. Men at working girl. Yeah. You don't have to say the whole thing. Working girl is so weird. Nah, he doesn't. Yeah.

Working girl is so weird because I think it's PG-13. I don't think it's an R, but it's got some... Pretty sexual, isn't it? It's got some sexual stuff in it, especially in the very early going, they're in like a limousine, Melanie Griffith and Kevin Spacey. And Kevin Spacey is watching footage of himself eating a woman out in a pool. Yeah.

It's so weird. And then later in the movie, you have to see Alec Baldwin with his shirt off. And he is the fucking hairiest motherfucker. Yeah. That should be rated R. That does not sound weird at all. Maybe it was rated R, but whatever was rated sound weird at all I maybe it was rated R but whatever was rated

is not enough I think it was rated R yeah I think it was but it was still just shocking you know what I mean to see like you don't see

Kevin Spacey eating out of shit you don't see a someone eating a girl out in R rated movies ever not in R rated no no just in G-rated movies. Okay,

so we have What's Up Doctor No Country for Old Men at Working Girl. What's Up Doctor No Country for Old Men at Working Girl. Yeah, that's what I said. Girls just want to have fun.

Yes, they do. Girls just want to have fun. We, they do. Girls just want to have fun. We got a little golf applause for that one. What I did sounded a lot less impressive when it's interrupted by... That's what I do. I interrupt. Okay, Brandon, you need... You made your bed. Now, Liony,

you need something that ends with what? Yeah. Or begins with fun. I just thought of one. What have you got? Fun House. That's a movie. Yeah, that is a movie.

Fun House. It's got Squiggy in it, doesn't it? If it doesn't, it should. Hello. Hello, Le it should. Hello. It should have... Hello, LeVan. Hello, LeVan. It should have David L. Lander in it.

Okay, so we've got What's Up Doctor, No Country for Old Men at Working Girls, Just Wanna Have Fun House. Party. Of course, house party. I know what to do here, but we'll see what Dan does. Do you want to say the whole thing? I won't interrupt this time.

Oh, no, no. I promise. Oh, wow. Are we playing build a title or are you taking over the world? What's up Doctor No country For old Men

At Working Girls Just wanna Have Fun What was yours? House

Party House Par Teen Wolf Par Teen Wolf Could've been a little less strenuous To just say

House Party 2 But but that's cool. I know. Brendan? Oh, boy. Has to end in what? So, like, can you think of a movie that, like, the last word is twat? Because that could work. Now I'm just going to be extra filthy because of steve's mom

uh boy twat's love got to do with it wolf wolf wolf wolf wolf wolf. Wolf, okay, yeah, yeah. Wolf, wolf. Wolf. Wolfman? Yeah, Wolfman. Yeah. Or you could have gone Wolf N. Or Wolf Blitzer.

Okay, we got man. We got man for Steve. Let's Man Who Knew Too Little. Yes. Man Who Made a Really Long Title. This is impressive. Man Who Knew Too Little. Yes. Man Who Made a Really Long Title. This is impressive. Man Who Knew. That was on like two episodes ago.

Somebody used Man Who Knew Too Little. Yeah, it's a good one. It's a good go-to when man comes up, which it does a lot. Okay, so Dan, you got Little. House on the Prairie. That was a television program and a series of books.

I could think of a... Never a motion picture, though. Yeah. So am I out? No, I'll give you another chance. I can only think of Little Man Tate. Yeah, why... That would have been good to say before...

I think that's what they said two episodes ago, though. I'm like recycling. Oh, I see. Well, that's not cheating. That's what I got. Good luck, Tate. Little Man Tate. Yeah, Tate. I'm like recycling. Oh, I see. Well, that's not cheating. That's what I got. Good luck. Tate. Little Man Tate. Little Man Tate. So we have, what's up, doctor?

No country for old men at Working Girls. Just want to have fun house party. Parting wolf man. Who knew too little man Tate? I don't know. That's tough with Tate. Yeah, yeah. Tate. I don't know. That's a tough one. Tate. Yeah, yeah. Don't say anything, you guys.

Oh, shit. The audience is dying to help. Oh, God. Tate. Tate. Tate. Tate. Tate. Tate. Tate. You're out. Okay. Yeah, yeah. What do you got? I'm going to go with little man Tate men out. Yes. Oh, shit. To eight men out. Okay. Yeah, yeah. What do you got? I'm going to go with Little Man Tate Men Out. Yes.

Oh, shit. To eight men out. All right, Dan. Do you think you could say the whole thing, Dan, without looking at it? No. That's the fourth word. Oh, boy. Oh, sure.

I'll say it, and then when I get to the end of it, you can add to it. What's up, Dr. No? Country for old men and working girls just want to have fun. House partying wolf man who knew too little man. Tape man out. Tape man out.

Is Out of Time a movie? Yes, it is. All right, there we go. Yeah. I usually like the guests to know what the movie is, but since you're not Graham Elwood, I'll let it slide. I believe, wasn't it Denzel Washington?

Out of Time? That's the one, yeah, I believe, wasn't it Denzel Washington? Out of Time? That's the one, yeah, where the devil is like a ghost that hides in Denzel Washington. No. What? I don't know, man. The devil is a ghost hiding in Denzel Washington? That's a different Denzel Washington movie.

You're thinking of Devil in a Blue Dress, maybe? No. Fallen. Fallen, yeah, yeah, yeah. Fallen. I got it out of time. Because there's a time limit, right? Where he's outside of a human body and he has to run.

You're fascinated. Eva Mendez, I think, was in that one. I think. Okay, so out of time. Bandits. Bandits. Time bandits. So you have to come up with something that starts with bandits.

Or. Or. We still got what's on the other end. so you have to come up with something that starts with bandits or or yeah you still got that what's but there's another fun way to go with bandits the pressure's on Dan the clock is ticking oh god you can do it it's a wonderful life

yes time bandits a wonderful life wouldn't it be fun if we did one once like this that never ended Yes! Time Band, It's a Wonderful Life. Wouldn't it be fun if we did one once like this that never ended? No time for Leonard Maltin. Thanks for coming. Hope you like Billy Tidal. We got to make way for the Brett Ernst show here tonight.

It's a Wonderful Life of Brian. Yeah. Wait a second. It sounds like people are objecting to that. That. Wait a second. It sounds like people were objecting to that. That's a good play. It's a wonderful... Wait. Yeah, why were you people

so upset by that? Because it's fucking hard to start a movie with Brian. Trying to end it. Brian Cranston. A man. An actor Of

Brian Brian Brian Oh Anne of Green Gables Yeah Fuck you Steve

Gables Yeah Or Bulls I think that might be a stopper I'm done I think that might be a stopper I see two gables That's it Gables. Yeah. Or Bulls. I think that might be a stopper. I'm done. I think that might be a stopper. I see two Gables. That's it.

We have a winner. Dan Telfer is our winner. What's up, Dr. No Country for old men at Working Girls? Just want to have fun house partying. Wolf man who knew two little men. Tate men out of time bandits a wonderful life of Brian of the Green Gables.

I smoked too much weed for the longer title. You almost died of asphyxiation when you were doing that. It was hard for me to get that all out. And I didn't pronounce the Bri Anne of Green Gables right. You said Anne of the Green Gables. Yeah.

Anyone seeing Anne of Green Gables knows the legendary Green Gables. Yeah. I would have gone Bri Annie was what I was thinking. Oh. Yeah. But, you know. Knee is too easy. It is?

No. Yeah, knee is a hard one. I think we had knee recently and we couldn't come up with anything. And then people wrote to me on Twitter and said, this is what you should have said. Needful things. As they always do. Needful things, yes.

Good one. Glad I fucked you with gables. Got to remember that one. It's like Scrabble. You got to remember the ones that help you to get to where you need to go. Alright, so Dan's going to get to go first when we play a Leonard Maltin game, which we will do as soon as... Little man Tate

legged freaks. Nice, yeah. It's back on! Cross everything after eight out! We're starting over! No Leonard Maltin. Fuck your name tags.

Freaks, do it. Come on, Steve. Yeah. I think the last time Little Man Tate came up, it went Little Man Tate Mile. Yes. I think is where it went.

Three movies that start with eight. It really fucked up. Yeah. So, gentlemen, please, let's, audience, name tags. Did really fucked up. Yeah. So, gentlemen, please, let's audience, name tags. Did you bring any? Wow. Everybody has a name tag.

Every single person has something. Except for this young lady right here. You're going to let him represent. I like the way some people have figured out that they can illuminate their name tag with a flashlight or something. There's a lot of clacking noises. Dan has a horse's head that says Mr. Ed, which is not a movie.

How creepy would it be if I did the rest of the... I think this is a working mask. Should I just wear this the rest of the show? If you can get your microphone in, yeah. All right. I would love that. If you can get your eyes. I think your head might be a little too big for it.

But we have some cupcakes, which I always enjoy. And what's the name of that girl from Toy Story? Jessie. Jessie, of course. And that's your name, I'm guessing. Oh, that's a nice one that Brendan picked out. Andrew loves movies

in the front row. That's a nice one. No, I'm good. All right, let's do this. If I ate everything that people brought me, I would have the biggest gun. Girl Scout cookies.

Very clever. This is a guaranteed win right here. No cheating. You can't look through it. I know, I know. So Steve picked David, who just attached a very simple piece of paper with the name David on it, to not only Leonard Maltin's 2012 movie guide, but from the fucking library.

I'll be honest, I sort of picked it because I was like, I'd like to have that. Maybe I'll keep it. No, I think you should. I think you should. I think, because those libraries, you know, they'll come at you. No, they'll come at David.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying is keep it and then, you know, Detective Bookman will come and have a chat with him. And Dan Telfer has the horse's head on. I got to say, I kind of like it. I know, and I'm doing this, you know, I'm trying to commit to this bit, but there is zero blood in my head right now.

Clearly, this guy, it's Mr. So your name is Ed? My name is Ed. It's too tight on your head? Very much so. But you know what you could do really quick just for the visual gag

and then take it off? Pretend to blow yourself. Yeah! Yeah! Eat that gun! The saddest part is he clearly stole this from a child. Like, he took this off a child's skull, the only thing that would fit in here,

and I just rubbed it on my groin. Eat that carrot, boy! Okay, okay, okay. That's the second horse head mask we've seen today. That is weird. That is weird. It's especially weird because... Oh, god damn it!

All right. That was the most painful experience I've ever had in my life. All right, well, hang on to it, though. It's a name tag, so the idea is

to keep it up to not throw it down on the ground. What's the name of the person? Ed. Oh. That should be easy

for me to remember. And then, uh, Lurassic Park. A very nice Jurassic Park illustration. Changed to Lurassic Park. Oh, and she even wrote the shithead on the back. Yeah. Is that what everybody does? That's for later.

Don't share it. Did David write his shithead on there? He did. Oh, nice. Does the horse have a shithead written on it? He spent all his energy punching a child in the face. Decided he could no longer operate the Sharpie. Well, I know since it's a horse's head

that the shithead should be the godfather. And talking! I'm right on a punchline and you start talking. I interrupt. You're giving it back to him now? So he can write it in the back. Oh. But, you know, I can take care of that stuff I can run the show and you can sit the fuck down

It wouldn't be a waste of time if you didn't draw attention to it You get it halfway done? Alright you'll take care of it later I'm tired of talking If you didn't talk to him about it into the microphone During my awesome godfather joke So the horse's head Oh my God, that hurts so much.

You had one in your bag at the hotel. Yeah. Yeah, I have a horse head mask in my suitcase. It's cool looking, too. Why do you have that? Not your phone,

but your horse head. You remembered your horse head. Yeah, I lost the phone. What a weird-ass coincidence that there's a horse head. You remembered your horse head. Yeah, I lost the phone. What a weird-ass coincidence that there's a fucking horse head back in your hotel room, and someone brought one as a name tag. Me and Duncan Trussell were doing these shows in Moontower, and we didn't know how weird we wanted to get with them.

So I brought a horse head and a Coolio wig. So your name is Ed? Yes. Okay, all right. I'll have to try to remember that since you gave him back the... Oh, you took it back. But there is a shithead on the back?

No, I took it away. I got bored. Okay. You got bored. You can go if you want. No, no. You don't have to stay. That's not the kind of boring.

This is boring. I was in a very awkward position, actually. I was worried I was going to fall in the front row trying to dangle the horse head over the first three rows. Yeah, yeah. You were totally shoving your gun in that lady's face.

I can't wait to say Mission Impossible for Gunt Protocol. Don't wait for an in. I just did. Don't wait for an in. I couldn't wait. Alright, Dan. I'm sorry I yelled at you. I was flashbacks to TJ and Pete.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Pierce. That was a really good one. But we're starting with you, Dan, since you won the big game. You get to pick a category. First person to, let's see how we're doing on time. Let's do the standard two points. First person to two. And you get to pick from the following categories,

and then we'll move on to David over here and then around to Brenda. Would you like... Steve. I called him David because he's sitting there with David in his lap. It makes sense. It tricked me. Playing for David, Steve will dead. Would you like the At King of pancakes category,

which is the number one movie at the box office 10 years ago to this very day, or just came up talking to Brendan about it. Uh, the category bully, which is movies where someone is bullied or this is a crazy category. One word review. Someone pointed out to me that Leonard Maltin once gave a movie a review that the entire review consisted of one word.

So would you like one word review, bully, or the number one movie at the box office 10 years ago? He only gave the one word review once. There's not like a bunch of movies with one word reviews. He may have done that gag more than once, but this is the one that was pointed out to me. It seems pretty extreme for Leonard

to just say one word because he likes to talk about movies. And it's not because it's the most random movie ever. And the movie is just like, duh. Like the review is just duh because it was like some House Party 9 bullshit. Alright, let's do it it let's do one word or like if I had said

two words there's that famous two words review in uh Spinal Tap Spinal Tap Shit Sandwich Shit Sandwich

cause the album was called Shark Sandwich yeah okay so you wanna go with that yeah let's do it okay The album was called Shark Sandwich. Yeah. Okay, so you want to go with that? Yeah, let's do it. Okay. One of the... Okay.

Someone just wrote to me today on Twitter going, is anyone ever going to pick that category? And I wrote back, not if they're smart. Oh, then we're going to have to go all out with this one, Doug. All right, here we go. The film is from 1948. Yep. This is going to be a bloodbath.

Leonard lists seven names. And the review... The year. Silly clue. I'll give you two clues. The genre is comedy. and the review silly clue I'll give you two clues the genre is comedy and the one word review is all that Leonard says

about this movie is no well that confirms it. You picked this as a category because the review is hilarious, not because there's any chance anyone will ever guess this movie.

Holy shit. Yeah, it comes down to a shit ton of strategy at this point. All right. Because you have to open with some sort of bid. Right, that's the best part. The audience is recommending seven. All right.

They're pretty smart. All right. What's your bid? Oh, God, I really want to just... Let's just go down in flames with this one, right? I think it's pretty obvious that you should just say seven names. All right. You should probably get all the names if you can.

I'm voting for the flames. Seven names, seven names, seven names. Seven names, he says. And then what does Steve say? Six. Six. Do not hit number.

Of course not. I'm surprised it didn't happen one turn ago. I know. Yeah, name that movie. Yeah. Oh, Steve. What did you do? Remember, he won in one round. He played one round, so he deserves this shit. I would rather

have Brendan have a point than Dan. Oh. It's strategy, so it's easier to catch up to Brendan. I'm going to fuck you so hard for the next round. Oh, boy. How much could a guy

know about movies if he walked three miles to see Bully? And there were teenagers chasing me the whole way there. Was it R or PG-13? What they were saying to you.

All right. Here are the clues again. Comedy and no. The year is 1948. And Steve playing for David, who stole Leonard's book from the library. Your six names are Pearl Bailey,

Roland Culver, Patrick Knowles, Billy DeWolf, Billy DeWolf? Billy DeWolf. I think he's the voice of the magician in the

Frosty the Snowman cartoon. I think so. I could beman cartoon. I think so. I could be wrong, but I think so. Or the guy's doing a Billy DeWolf impression. His famous Billy DeWolf impression. I close with a Billy DeWolf. Sometimes cartoon voices are an impression of a famous person,

like the Ant and the Aardvark. John Beiner did both of the voices, and one was Dean Martin, and the other one was Jackie Mason. Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah. It's like, hey, I'm gonna go. I'm starving.

I gotta eat some ants. What are you doing eating some ants? It sounds more like Matthew McConaughey, but you got the idea. All right, all right. All right, all right. Mona Freeman and Mary Hatcher are your six names. Do you have any idea?

The audience is in pain. You should give him a point if he can name a movie within five years of 1948. Is that hard? Yeah. Any idea? I got nothing okay nothing at all

what is it the reason the review just says no is because is it racist or something that's the only thing I can think of is it called

no the review just says no because the title of the movie is isn't it romantic no I kind of want to see it now it's like oh boy Leonard's pretty much saying No. I kind of want to see it now. It's like Leonard's pretty much saying it's completely not romantic.

Did it get bombed? But he gave it two stars. Is it that kind of a famous movie? Or no? I think there may have been another movie called Isn't It Romantic? Or some other movie with romantic in it? I know all three words have been used in titles.

But the star of this movie, which probably wouldn't have helped anybody in this room, including myself, was Veronica Lake, was the star of Isn't It Romantic? No. Brendan Walsh has a point, everybody. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Game master alert. Just hanging out with you and talking to you. I've never used the sentence,

Brendan Walsh has a point. Yay! Everybody listen up. Brendan Walsh is right. All right. That doesn't sound right. So we'll start with Dan and then go towards Steve.

Yeah, I'll pick them topics. Right? Does that change the order around? No, no, the other way. Dan, then Brendan. And then Steve. Playing for David, who stole a book. Pick a category, Dan. Would you like, and by the way, you're great at picking categories.

I feel bad doing this one right after that, but I'm going to do it anyway. Oh, you're going to bait me. At Blue Sun 2, B-L-U-S-U-N 2, suggested a movie whose title is only two letters. Two letter titles. I've done the research and there's quite a few

of them, more than you'd think. Or, at Dead at Home suggested, Peggy Sue got Marley'd in me, and that's movies where Kathleen Turner dies. That guy made that up! She was in Peggy Sue and Marley and Me, and, you know,

Marley is a ghost in the Christmas... I think that's what that up. She was in Peggy Sue and Marley and Me. And, you know, Marley is a ghost in the Christmas. I think that's what that means. So Peggy Sue got Marley in Me. Kathleen Turner dies. Or from at John W. Morrison, timely as today's earlier conversation, found footage, movies where a character or characters are barefoot. Let's go for more gross foot bullshit. Let's keep that theme going.

I could only think of one, and we used it last time. Yeah, so there's another one. I mean, it's happened a lot. There's a lot of movies where people are barefoot. Right, there's a whole movie in Die Hard. It's not all movies where the protagonist is barefoot for 100% of the movie. I cannot go... We cannot have a conversation about it,

but maybe. Okay. Barefootedness is featured in some respect. Exactly. Could be the movie The Barefoot Executive, because that was about a chimp that didn't wear shoes. It's not The Barefoot Executive. Could be Barefoot in the Park

with Robert Redford and Jane Fonda. Leonard Mullen gives this movie that features barefootedness three stars. The year is 2009. He says about this movie that it features a disabled man and that it

is um uh It's an Oscar winner. It won some Oscars. Okay, 2009. And there are 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 names. How many names do you think you can get it in? Dan Tilfer.

Staying in Chicago. Eight names. The gem of Chicago says eight names. And we go to Brendan. Eight names, huh? Mm-hmm. I'll tell you to name it. All right, let's do it, buddy.

All right, my money's on Dan. Steve is going to be bringing up the rear after this happens. Or Brendan will win, and that will be it. I'm not even going to say the clues again, Dan. No, why would you? You can ask for them after you hear the eight names, but in the interest of time, I'm just going to say the eight names. Maybe I wanted to keep...

Why are you talking to people in the audience? What's going on? Focus on the game, Dan. Worst guest ever. Laz Alonso was in this movie. Wes Studi. CCH Pounder. Joel David Moore.

Giovanni Ribisi. Michelle Rodriguez. Steven Lang. And Sigourney Weaver. Oh. Those are your eight names in a movie from 2009 that got three stars. Shush. Are you coughing the answer or just coughing?

This woman's choking on her beverage. I know. Is it Choke? Really? That's your guess? Choke? Is it Chuck Palahniuk book? I'm willing to guess that not one of those eight people are in Choke.

Maybe Giovanni Ribisi is in Choke now. What a shitty strategy I have. Maybe. I don't know what it is. I don't know what it is. The guy in the front just said, you're going to hate yourself. I apologize for underestimating you, Brendan. I apologize.

The other names are Zoe Saldana and Sam Worthington. Oh, fucking Avatar. Yeah, the motherfucker's barefoot the whole motherfucking time. His bare blue feet. That was such a piece of shit movie. I erased it from my memory. God damn it.

So what the hell just happened? Did Brendan win? Brendan just won, yeah. Brendan won. Yeah, man. Brendan just won. Brendan won. Yeah, man. Using strategy. I'm even wearing all blue when I got that shirt on. Sorry, child puncher.

Eight names. Well, but you certainly have nothing to be embarrassed about if you hold yourself up to the fact that recently Pete Holmes couldn't get Devil Wears Prada with all of the names. Meryl Streep. I've also never guessed the movie correctly. Anne Hathaway.

That's all you need right there. Stanley Tucci. The girl from Five Year Engagement. Blunt. Engagement Blunt Emily Blunt Oh I thought you were saying Why would I forget that? for a body part

a blunt She does have a nice blunt That's when you shit your pants that's the bulge in the back of your pants it's called a blunt Well congratulations on that stunning victory. That's pretty impressive.

Thank you. Oh, yeah, just leave it on there. Okay, now, Dan, do me a huge favor and put your microphone down on your stool or wherever you want to put it down and go get from that gentleman. He can write it down on a napkin or something, but just go grab who he wants me to call a shit hit.

And, uh, we've, uh, we, you know, we've ended with, I was like trying to save time by not saying the clues again. Cause I thought this would go another round. Oh, at least. Yeah. Because, uh, avatar seems so easy to me. You just, you just blocked everything about it out of your mind. Like I'm sorry. I asked you a question when you don't have a microphone

there's the shithead there you go yes he's got it alright have a seat Dan thank you for doing that I appreciate it let's just play another round for funsies yeah let's see here What does that even say dude?

That's just like a friend of yours or something? He's a stand up comedian He's a comedian from Chicago who lives in LA now Say as much about it as you can His name is pronounced And then Okay I got Wow these are some interesting shitheads

Oh there's on the back of this one yeah we don't care though you won oh she doesn't get the she gets the prizes yeah yeah okay okay I thought you got to

I thought you got to she gets the motherfucking prizes but she can call someone a shithead too the way you said okay okay it was like we were all screaming at you so I was like

I might as well that's the pot brownie kicking in why are they so bad at me? What did I do? Yeah! Nobody yells at me in the movies. Oh, look behind your shoulder right now.

Yeah, right over his shoulder, Sam Kinison. He's looking right at me. Scream in peace. Who did you... Oh, Oh. Who did you... Oh, uh... Who'd you play for? Oh, oh, oh! Ow, ow!

Where is Larassic? You went way back there? Yeah, she's like on the side. Can you come get your prize, Laura? Let's give her her thing back too, right? Let's see who she said for her shithead. Oh, I like that shithead. That's a good one.

You're welcome. Congratulations, Laura. There's your prize bag. You're welcome, Laura. You're welcome. It's always got to be about you. There's your horse head back, Ed. Just feed it some peanut butter.

That's how they made Mr. Ed talk, supposedly. That's what I'd tell people when I was a tour guide at Universal. Were you really that? Yeah, yeah, and we'd have these stories because the trams stall out sometimes. So wherever you stall out, you have to be able to tell a story. So if you stall out in Western Town, you just go, this is where all the Mr. Ed, or not Mr. Ed, what was the movies with the talking horse?

Oh. Shit. Choke. No. I want to look that up. I want to see if Giovanni Ribisi's even in there, just to give you a shred of dignity. I don't think he is. Oh, it's Sam Rockwell and fucking... I always mix those two up.

Yeah. I never mix those two up. Francis the Talking Mule? Yes. Yeah, I would go, this those two up. Francis the Talking Mule? Yes. Yeah. Yeah, I would go, this is where all the Francis the Talking Mule, I'd point to a random barn and just go, that's where they filmed

Francis the Talking Mule movies. That's funny. And to get Francis to talk, they would feed him peanut butter and move his lips around like Steve is demonstrating for the audience now. Thank you very much, Steve.

Wow. This girl in the front row doesn't know comedy club etiquette. She keeps talking to us. It's the ball show? Because all of our testicles are in your face? It's the

gunt show. Did you not think that would be a possibility when you accepted the front row seat? Oh, we don't need to talk about it now. You're not Mike, so it's a weird thing to listen to on a podcast. You yelled at me when I talked to her,

and then we have to go into her whole seating. Because she keeps talking. That's why I yelled at you for starting this shit. Look, I was pushing a piece of string on the ground with my foot, and she took it away from me. It was very territorial. That's what I'm saying. Anything comes into your head at any point,

just shout it out into a microphone. It's weird. There's a robot on your hoodie. It's true. It's true. It's true. All right, Steve, we'll let you pick a category. And then we'll go to Brendan and then to Dan. And you can choose between the following.

At team underscore hate, team hate, wrote DBH, which stands for do bong hits, which is apparently an expression they use on the President Steve show in Philadelphia, a show I like to go on, so I was happy to accept this category. Plus, the bong hits thing helped, too. So this is movies where someone takes a bong hit

for whatever reason. At I Make Jokes 1 suggested Diane Keaton, and that's one suggested Diane Keaton and that's movies where Diane Keaton dies I've been getting a lot of those from people lately killing off these aging actresses where different people die yes and then in honor of my good friend Jeff Garlin who is from

the Chicago area at Fuzco66 suggested Grandma's Cock, which is something Jeff likes to say. There's no movie. It's just you have to think of things Jeff likes to say. No, it's movies that Jeff Garland is in

is the Grandma's Cock category. So which one would you like, Steve? Grandma's Cock or Diane Keaton or Dubong Hits?aton or Dubong Hits? How about Dubong Hits? All right. This is from... Seven or eight people clap for that.

This is from 2009. And Leonard Maltin gives this movie in which somebody does a bong hit two and a half stars. He says about this movie that it is laid back. And he says the results are somewhat mild overall. Ooh. Yeah, mild overall and laid back. Kind of the same thing. And he lists...

Whoa, that's weird. Now you're Podbronky. There's someone with a junior in their name, lists. Whoa, that's weird. Now your pod brownie is coming in. No, there's someone with a junior in their name, but he listed it separate, so I thought for a second that someone who's just called Junior is in the movie, but that is not the case. And there are, so it screwed up my count, five, six, seven, ten names. How many names? What?

What year was it again? The year is 2009. How many names do you think you get in Steve? I'll bet seven. Steve Archer. What part of town do you live in, Steve? Lincoln Square. And what do you do for a living?

I'm a karaoke DJ. That's why he's been so good on the mic. And talks when it's his turn to talk How many names? Eight? I'll bet seven Seven, okay Brendan? Goes to me? Sure

Did you say what genre the movie is? Or no, you don't Did you not say that? It's the bong hit genre Oh, you don't? Did you not say that? It's the bong hit genre. Oh, right, okay. It's got a bong hit in it. And he calls it laid back and mild.

So it's probably not an action movie. Probably not a period piece. But I'm not saying... I'll go six. Okay. What do you think of that, Dan? Brendan Walsh named that movie. Okay. We'll see.

I have one in mind, but I could be wrong. We'll see. Your six names are Gene Simmons, Beth Grant, former and future guest on the show, David Koechner. Also a hard one to reign in.

He's really wild when he's on. Oh, yeah. Dustin Milligan. Clifton Collins Jr. Clifton Collins Jr., who's one of the vegan police in Scott Pilgrim. And J.K. I always say this wrong. J.K.

It's either Simmons or Simons. I think it's Simmons. J.K. Simmons. either Simmons or Simons. I think it's Simmons. J.K. Simmons. Those are your six names. Yeah, you know it. What? No, I'm talking to.

Oh, yeah. Dan knows it. So he's dancing around like he's some sort of victory. Some sort of hollow victory he's having over there. I probably saw this, too. What was the thing you thought it might be? Pineapple Express. Are you ruling that out? Yes. Let's rule that out. Yeah, that's. Yeah. That was my only thought this too. What was the thing you thought it might be? Pineapple Express. Are you ruling that out?

Yes, let's rule that out. Yeah, that's, yeah. That was my only thought too. 2009. It's David Koechner. All right, so Steve gets the point if we were still playing, but it's really, it's over.

Yeah, Dan told him to name it. I'm still giving the point to you though. Yes, I got a point. You're my favorite KJ. Thanks. Do you know KJ Simmons? Do you guys work together? Yeah, also in this movie, Ben Affleck,

Kristen Wiig, Mila Kunis, and Jason Bateman. It's called Extract. Mike Judge film from out of the Austin area where you did some time. Yeah, I would have never gotten that. Did you ever see it?

I did see it. It is laugh out loud funny when Jason Bateman takes a bong hit. Yeah. It's really funny. It's CGI. It's not real, but it's so fucking funny.

Also T.J. Miller. Yeah, yeah, yeah. T.J. Miller's in it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But not listed. His part's too small. Aww. I think Nick Th Miller's in it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But not listed. His part's too small. I think Nick Thune's in that too, isn't he? Maybe.

I don't know. They're in the same band, maybe. We have a confirmation. Okay. It is a fact now. Nick Thune is in it. He does what? He works at a guitar shop. You're three rows away and you did the thing with your hands like a megaphone. The Ricola guy thing. Are you the Ricola guy?

Alright, I'm going to say three shitheads here at the very end because I like the one that Jurassic Laura Jurassic Park suggested is a better one than these other two. I mean, we'll see. Maybe you guys know something I don't know, but I'm pretty sure these aren't

going to get a laugh, but we'll find out. Steve, you got anything to promote? Is there a place here in town where people can come and see you, KJ? Come and see me at the Local 22 on State and Hubbard, five nights a week, Tuesday through Saturday, karaoke. We have a good time. Come and see me.

Yay! Steve Archer! Yeah! Yeah! Good time. Come and see me. Yay. Steve Archer. Yeah. About the fourth or fifth guest we've had on the show that's like a non-comedian, actor, writer, director, anything like that. Dan Telfer. Got some shows coming up. This is probably going to plop in a few days.

May 10th through 12th, I'll be at the Comedy Attic in Bloomington, Indiana. Love that place. It's a lovely place. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, go see him there, you guys. And Brandon Walsh,

what do you got coming up? New phone. I don't have my calendar. My calendar's in my phone. I don't fucking know where I'm going to be. I think I'm going to be in Denver at some point.

Maybe here, too. I think I'm coming here in like a at some point. Maybe here, too. I think I'm coming here in like a month or two. Not here, here, but somewhere. Yeah, yeah, we don't need to say it then. If you're not playing Zanies, you're dead to us. Well, maybe you could book me right now. Okay. You got to play Zanies, especially, you know that bit you do where you need four microphones?

Yeah, yeah. They will be ready for you. My press conference bit. You've got like a BrendanWalsh.com or something? Oh yeah, BrendanWalsh.com. Follow me on Twitter. Alright. Let's see. I had a few things I wanted to mention. New York Gramercy Theater.

Oh, listen to The Bone Zone, my podcast. Sorry. My podcast is called The Bone Zone. Look that up. It's coming back to me now. You're always with the fucking late plugs. I'm sorry. Like I say, what are your plugs? You just stammer and stumble and say shit about your phone. Oh, I'm on Twitter. I'm on Twitter.

Oh, Dan's on Twitter, everybody. Sorry. I'll be at the Gramercy Theater doing Douglas movies on Monday, June 11th. Another Douglas movies taping will happen at the Tipsy Crow in San Diego on July 11th during Comic-Con week. Pittsburgh Improv, Stand-Up, and Letter and Ball and Game

against Graham Elwood on July 28th and 29th at 420. All dates, deets, and links at DougLovesMovies.com. One more time for my guests, Steve Archer, Dan Horsehead Telfer, Brendan the Beard Walsh. Thanks to you for coming, you guys. You bought your tickets way in advance.

I appreciate it. Thanks to Zany coming, you guys. You bought your tickets way in advance. I appreciate it. Thanks to Zany's Comedy Club here in the heart of Chicago. And as always, Mike Bridenstine. Is that how you pronounce it? Mike Bridenstine is a shithead. See, that doesn't mean anything to anybody. And the Midnight Rambler is a shithead See what I'm saying

But Lurassic Park says Coldplay is a shithead Yeah Nobody said it was easy Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie Eyes of gold his viewing prowess Makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you.

The Doug Club Movies!