Doug Loves Movies - Dale Cheesman, Doogie Horner and Myq Kaplan guest

Episode Date: June 2, 2019

Live from Laugh Boston, Doug welcomes Dale Cheesman, Doogie Horner and Myq Kaplan to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeenie babies, sticky seeds With 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Because Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. Coming to you for the second time, not the first time in this city but the second time at laugh Boston in Boston Massachusetts

so excited to be back it's's Saturday, June 1st. Did you pay the rent? Or did you spend it to come to this show? This is day one of the Cannabis and Cheese Tour. Yeah. I'm already wondering which city is going to have the best name tags. already wondering which city is going to have the best name tags.

And I have a feeling it might be this one. Holy shit. You guys bring the weirdest stuff. What is with this fellow right here? What's the best way to handle... Can you just hold him like... There you go.

Look at this motherfucker. Does he, I mean she, have a name? Oh, it is a he? There's no junk under here. What's his name? Mr. Utley. Well, he's got treats glued to himself. It's almost like a bomb dog.

But instead of having a bong strapped to him, yeah. That's what I was trying to do. Suicide vest joke. I mean, I guess a bunch of Milky Ways and Reese's is a form of suicide. It's just extra slow. Isn't that right, doggy? Oh, shit. You dropped something, doggy. Here, sit on that. Sit. Lay down. I'll hang on to that. Although, actually, he should hang on to it in case one of the, because it is a bribe for one of the guests. I don't know

how to put it back in his mouth. I also don't like that I just said that sentence. There you go. There's your Utley and your weed. Ephraim Dusk Till Dawn. They like it. Kinky Bootsy?

Your name is Bootsy? Nickname. Okay. Some parents will do that to you. The Shawning. I like that very much. This is a Babadook thing? Barbara Duke.

Very nice. What are these shitty pieces of paper over here? Look at this one, you guys. There's a movie called Dave, so he just wrote Dave. So it is legit. It is a real movie-themed name tag. You put a little stick figure on it. You made him for everybody?

Because the one with the talent, of course, has to share with his friends. There's the Meg. And grumpy old Ben. If any of these gets picked, I'm going to be so angry. And then those people, did you make those for them? Do you even know those people? What are the odds that there would be more shitty name tags right next to yours? But theirs are like on napkins. I can't even read that shit. Wow, there's a lot of hand-drawn bullshit.

And then amazing stuff like this one right here. Can I see this one, Brad? Look at this. This is how it's done next time you take out your pencil. Yeah, Brad Max. He got my name in, he got my face in there, and then he also says at the back, if you pick this name tag,

then you deserve some positive energy. Brad knows what he's doing. Tequila Ben Rise, that one's nice too. Let me see that shit. That's like a scroll or something. Look at that. I look good next to Michelle Pfeiffer. Don't know what happened to my movie career.

All right, well, great job to all of you, even those of you who tried not at all. I appreciate every single one of you. Doug plugs, tomorrow the tour continues with the 420 stand-up show at the Comedy Connection in Providence, Rhode Island.

Then Tuesday night, DLM returns to Helium, hashtag gas, in Philadelphia. Thursday, June 6th, I'm doing stand-up for the first time ever at Magoobies.

We've all heard about Magoobies if you listen to comics on satellite radio plug in their shows. I've heard about it so I'm gonna go visit it for the first time. That's outside Baltimore and then next Saturday and Sunday is gonna be stand-up and a Doug Loves Movies at the DC Improv both at 420 for all the cheesy deets. Go to Douglovesmovies.com That's Douglovesmovies.com Yeah!

We're going! We're all in! Shh! Shh! Shh! I'd like to do a dugout to a friend of the show, Tim Brennan, who is leaving tonight for a European tour with Dropkick Murphys. And I'm sure that will be, I'm sure they'll like them over there.

I don't think it'll be a problem. I brought some prizes. I'm pretty happy about what I brought for you guys today. Starting with, I was in Madison Wisconsin last weekend so I got you a copy of Madison magazine yeah it's got like 50 things that give Madison color whatever that means it's very ethnic it's really It's a very ethnically diverse place. Douglas Movie sticker. Oh, this is probably the most exciting item.

It's a Tito's handmade vodka fanny pack. Yeah, and then I'm not going to take it out, but you can trust me. There's a tiny bottle of Tito's in there. And then, speaking of tiny bottles, I had room service this morning and they gave me a tiny ketchup. I love those tiny ketchups.

I went to P-fucking-Changs yesterday. I already had enough calories during my meal, so I skipped the fortune cookie. And then also one of the Doug Loves Movies, I mean, Doug Benson pins that you've heard about on the show from rockandpins.com. Only have a few left of those, like a handful left. So when I'm standing around after the show, if you really want one, come ask me and give me $10. It's that easy.

But photographs and autographs are free, of course. We'll all hang out. It got kind of weird outside, so I guess we'll just hang out in the hotel lobby. Or, you know, or the lobby of this club.

Someone's going to win all of that. Plus the stuff brought by my three guests. Let's get them out here. Please Boston, give it up for Dale Cheeseman, Mike Kaplan, and Doogie Horner! Thank you, David. All right, before we get into this, I don't have a straw in my drink, and I thought, oh, is Massachusetts a no-straw place? Because that's happening all over the country. But thank you.

I want one. I still want one. I'm going to keep using straws until they really are completely gone. Because this straw already exists. If I don't use it, it still exists. It's a lame argument, but... But they didn't give any of the comedians straws, because, you know, that works.

They actually did give us straws, and we threw them right in the river. And... I saw a turtle eat them, and I was like, whoa. Well, let's go ahead and meet them individually, starting with the man who just spoke. That's Doogie Horner! Hello.

Hello. Hello. Hello. Good to see you, Doogie. Good to see you, Doug. Coming in from New York City for the show. Yeah, boy, the big scrapple. And what's that book there? Was that something for you to read on the train?

No, this is a book I wrote. You don't read books you wrote on the train? Yeah, I write books on the train, Doug. No, yeah, I wrote a novel. It's called This Might Hurt a Bit, and it's my first novel, and I'm really excited about it. That's awesome. Yeah.

And it's going in the prize bag, yes? Yes. Yes, thank you for sending me a copy. No, he really did. I wasn't being... I guess everything I say sounds like I'm fucking around. Thank you, dude. He thanked him.

Everything I do, I send him all my clippings from local newspapers about shows. He keeps me posted. I assume he hangs them on his fridge, but I'm not sure. Magnets only on my fridge. But someone named Ransom Riggs, so somebody you made up, said about this book that it's full of wit and wisdom and riotously funny to boot a phenomenal debut.

Yep. Yeah. Oh, that dude wrote Miss Peregrine's Guide to Home for Kids That Are Fucked Up. Miss Peregrine's House of Fucked Up Kids. Dare you enter the home of weird children. I love it thank you it's sitting to doogie's right is a gentleman who's been on the show before and we're happy to have him back it's mike caplan everybody hello thank you ah thanks thank you so much i'm sorry i didn't bring a book that i wrote because i didn't write a book.

Is that something you think you'll do at some point? Yeah. I mean, I guess in some ways I have written a book. It depends how you define a book. Right? I mean, once you have thousands of tweets, that's enough words to fill a book. Yes.

Weird book, though. Yeah. That's not, I mean, nobody, I'm not, you can't have it. What about, I was thinking, what about a book of tweets that's just responses to other tweets, and you don't include the tweet you're responding to? So it's just a lot of tweets like, okay, see you there. Or retweet, original tweet, not available. I go back and delete some of my promotional tweets, so I feel like sometimes people, when they respond to those,

they're going to look at it later and think I removed it just because I didn't like their response. Like, why don't you come to Toronto? What was that about? Invariably, someone's going to tweet me tomorrow. Probably some joker from here, now that I'm saying it. But somebody that lives in Boston that's not at the show today will tweet me tomorrow saying, when are you coming to

Boston? Happens all the time. And I'm so excited. Oh, what did you bring for the prize bag, Mike? MIKE ABRAMS- Oh, I brought an album that is called Please Be Seated. It's a musical comedy album that I made with my buddy Micah Sherman,

who I met here, right here on this very chair. And yeah, it's comedy, music, and the end. That's the end, what it is. That's all it is. I love it. Please be seated. And they're both sitting behind a chair that has a tack on it,

and they're waiting for someone to get their butt poked. We don't really want that to happen to people. That's a joke. Would the photographer of this picture didn't fall for it? Oh, no. Going over and sit down? The photographer kept just taking the picture. Turned out great.

Speaking of great, who doesn't love cheese? And who doesn't love Dale Cheeseman? Yay! Yay! So many people here for you today, Dale. Except for that guy. I've been, well...

Yeah. He might be saving his clapping for if you get an answer right today. No, now I have a goal. I'm going to get him on my side. You got a name tag? Win that guy over. Oh, don't even... Well, guess who's not getting picked? He's got something to sneeze into if he

needs it. He just scribbled on a napkin Dale thank you for being here thanks for having me what do you have for the prize bag well it's not a book do you need help with the musical no I rode the mega bus here and I got here like 30 minutes before the show

so you didn't have time to shop so I rode with the people with you all I assume and we only stopped once at like a Burger King slash some guys like stand by the highway

so I got like a Fritos salute our nation in our troops edition chips it's just regular Fritos. Right. But with a special support the troops shout out on there. So we all know you're going to eat Fritos, right? At least do it the right way.

Eat Fritos for the troops. Do you think any of the money from that supports the troops in any way? No. Have you ever met a troop? No. It's money problems. ever met a troop? No. It's money problems. I've met one or two troops. Just saluting them is enough.

Yeah. Just give them a salute. You better eat those Fritos standing up with your hat off. Hand over your heart. And then it doubles as a flag at the end. The bag, you've run it up. Oh, they're not giving out money per bag or anything, but Frito's brand is donating $100,000

to Carry the Load, an organization that honors and supports our nation's military, veterans, first responders, and their families. So that's nice. Yeah, so it was a good thing to promote after all. Yeah. You know, but this is not fair. He wrote a whole book

and he made a musical album, and y'all clapped the exact same amount for these Fritos that I brought. You know how hard it is to write a novel? Especially one for the troops. Yeah, my book is also for the troops. I didn't mention it because I don't want to showboat.

I'm really humble, but my musical album is for pacifists. It's fight time, Mike. It's not anti. I mean, I'm not going to fight you. I win. It's for Andrew Garfield's character in Hacksaw Ridge. Oh, yeah.

He was a real pacifist, but he was out there in the trenches helping other dudes. Just didn't hurt anybody. All right. Oh, what was the other thing? Well, I might save it for the next show now. Those Fritos were a big hit. Fritos really went off

well. I thought it was funny. This is an apple juice that they had to sell in the shape of an apple to be like, no, this is what it is. I just want everything to come in a largely plastic container shape like the thing that it's...

Martinelli's. It's Martinelli's apple grape. It's really good quality. So y'all have heard of it, obviously. And they're giving $100 to the troops. Wow. Here at Martinelli's, we know how important it is

to support the troops. All of that is in the prize bag today, you guys. Yeah, we're not fucking around. Also, I gotta say, I was pleasantly surprised by them closing all the curtains in here. Before the show, there was a lot of light coming in on these windows.

I was like, is that really what it's going to look like during the show? I guess I didn't remember how it worked from the last time I was here. I'll probably have that realization every time. Oh, they close the curtains. Because they can leave them open at night, right? Because it's just night out there. That's right, Utley. He knows what I'm talking about.

Oh, and his name tag says all dogs go to Kevin. Because your name is Kevin. Nice. But he's a dog. He goes to himself? No, he's going to Kevin. Oh, you're Kevin. I thought Kevin was the dog. I'm sorry.

The dog's name is Utley, you idiot. I think some stuff happened before I got to the stage. I said it while you've been sitting here. I wasn't listening very much. I had a CBDT that's as high as I get and 100%. Oh wow, you support the CBDT community? Happy Pride Month

everyone. L-G-B-T-Q-I-A C-B-D-T Sorry Kevin. C-B-D-T. Sorry, Kevin. And Utley? Yeah. Oh, Mr. Utley.

I thought you said ugly. I thought you were just calling. Yeah, that's why you wouldn't want to repeat that, because it's an adorable dog. Yeah, it didn't make any sense. Let's start again. See that big J in his mouth? Oh, yeah. Oh, shit, that dog's smoking weed.

He doesn't even bother to take it out of the container. What's up, dog? Last longer that way. Yeah, dude. Keep it in the package. I got a question for each and every one of you before we get to the game portion

of the show. Because I just like people out there trying to think about, you know, what movies they should see. It's hard to choose these days. There's so many.

There's so many independent ones. So many big studio pictures. So let's just talk about the movies we've seen. Yeah, I think that's a good idea. Recently. It's like you're trying to remember your own show. I just don't usually take the time to set up how, why I do this in every show. That's how complicated the games have gotten.

You have to explain the rules to conversation. Hey, man, I think at any point during that sentence you could have stopped. You know what I mean? Let's talk about the movies that we've seen recently. That's what we're here for. So we'll start with you, Doogie. What was the last movie you saw?

I saw a movie called Siege. It was from the 80s, and it's called Canucksploitation. It's like B movies that were shot in Canada. It's a very small genre. It was shot in Nova Scotia, and it's about like there's a police. Got one woo back there. Got one. One one for ns uh there's a police strike and this well-armed gang of criminals is trying to get at this guy they're

trying to break into this apartment building and there's no cops anywhere and so they're trying to get in and then the people inside set all these different traps it's kind of like Home Alone, but like more deadly. And it came out in the 80s? By the way, Home Alone was deadly. Also really deadly. The shit that happened to those guys, each and every one

would just fucking kill them. Dead, dead, dead. But instead, it's hilarious. Well, I saw Home Alone 2. That's even crazier. You saw it also? Yeah. I saw Home Alone 2, lost in New crazier. You saw it also? Yeah.

I saw Home Alone 2. Lost in New York. Lost in New York, yeah. I was lost in New York and I was like, well, I guess I'll watch Home Alone. Figure this out. Okay, nobody followed me.

Thank you. Okay. I apologize. But yeah, that one's even crazier. Like he goes to hit them with paint buckets, but they're like, oh wait,

we know he's going to throw paint buckets. So he throws both the paint buckets and they're like, okay, now we can go up the stairs. And then but they're like, oh wait, we know he's gonna throw paint buckets. So he throws both the paint buckets and they're like, okay, now we can go up the stairs. And then as they're walking up the stairs, he sends down this huge lead pipe.

I mean, they'd be so dead. Yeah. He's dropping bricks on their head. There's a movie where a child is attempting to murder two dudes.

Yeah. And he does it in more than two different states over the course of two movies. That's And he does it in more than two different states over the course of two movies. That's a federal offense. One of the goofy pranks. Yeah.

One of the goofy pranks is just a nail completely through his foot. Yeah. Which is like saw level gross. But you add like a boing to it. It's fine. Have you guys seen the Mrs. Doubtfire that got remade into a horror preview?

Yeah. It's so good. I already love it. They use the real Mrs. Doubtfire and put music to it, and then you're like, oh, God. This is not OK. There's just such a fine line between how friendly Robin Williams is and how scary he can be.

Like, he really can do both. He put on a stranger's skin. And then snuck into a house where he was legally not allowed to be. No, that's how we'll save all these old movies that have become problematic. We'll just recut them into horror movies. And we can keep all these, like, Revenge of the Nerds terrible now, right? Recut it with spooky music, and it's just a great tale of caution. The greatest horror.

Don't trust the nice guy. They should remake Mrs. Doubtfire. And he has a really bad, like a restraining order against himself. Because in that movie it's more like Sally Fields just like, hey please don't come around anymore. You're terrible.

But what if he had an actual restraining order and police got involved? I think it's a great idea. Green light. She's talking to the chief and she's like, wait, you look an awful lot like my husband, too, you son of a... Rips his... It's darker film.

Yeah, that's right. The rest of the movie, that whole family, I mean, for the rest of their lives, that whole family can't trust any woman. They're, like, looking at every woman going, is that a wig? There's the moral. You can't trust any woman.

Emphasis on doubt. Yeah. This is doubt everything. You're fired. Yeah. What about Mr. Doubtfire, like a Glenn Close or somebody that's really good?

You know, she was good as Albert Nobbs. Ooh. Like, you know, or Barbra Streisand from Yentl. Just anybody that's great and looking like a man. I think Glenn Close, because Glenn could be a guy's name. That's right. Okay, so it's going to be about the actual Glenn Close. Yeah.

Dresses up as a man to be with her children. And she's probably just happily married and the kids love her. And her last name is Close. Yeah. That's where she is. She's not supposed to be Glenn Closer than you think. Keep your Glenns close. But you're Glennamy.

Keep your Glenns closer, yeah. but your Glen and me is closer keep your glens closer yeah so thumbs up for Siege yeah it was really good

it was really good I'm just excited I remember the name of that movie I'm so impressed it took me a second I was like what who

oh right to be fair it had like three titles. It's like, what does Siege have to do with Glenn Close? Well, that's the name of her movie. It's going to be called Mr. Dumb Siege. Mike, what was the last movie you saw? I saw In the Theater, John Wick 3.

And then I saw on my screen at home Tootsie and Quick Change recently. Do you know the movie Quick Change? Yeah, Bill Murray. Yeah, a family member told me to watch it, and I was like, so I did. And you can too. You don't have to. It's available for everybody. Absolutely.

Bill Murray's a clown. Tootsie was a good movie when it came out, but I don't feel that. Does it hold up? Not a bunch. No, there's a lot of assault. Oh, because he's pretending to be a woman and people force themselves on him and he forces himself on people?

Yeah. Everybody does. Yeah, that's what they do. Yeah, that's what Tootsie's about. It's nice that today's better. You know, Tootsie's a Broadway musical now and I'm sure they got rid of most of that stuff.

There's still the overall deception of spending months pretending to be another person of another sex. But other than that, seems cool. Kind of similar to Mrs. Doubtfire. Yeah. Are all our movies going to be Mrs. Doubtfire adjacent?

Just the ones that I'm watching. And John Wick, my favorite part, is where he dresses as a woman. And somebody's like, I'm supposed to kill somebody here, but then a horse kicks a person. And man, what a beautiful ballet that weird movie is. It really is like a dance. Yeah. Like there's so much

choreography i honestly have to watch the first couple again because i like dumb action movies but when i saw the first one i was like oh everyone seems like they they're getting real hurt here and it made me feel bad uh but now i'm like oh i shouldn't have done that uh i shouldn't have felt bad because it's like it's ridiculous it's uh i was was taking John Wick 1 seriously. I made a mistake, but I love it. I mean, the guy who directed it, the people involved creatively are stuntmen, and Keanu Reeves is super into doing stunts, so yeah, it's amazing what they get on film.

It's acrobatic. Most movies where gnarly shit's happening to people, you're not seeing their face that much, but who knows how much effects work they did, too, to pull some of that off. Starring Glenn Close. Cheeseman? Doug.

I recently saw Hail Satan, which was with a question mark, so don't make up your minds just yet. It's like a question. like, hey, hail Satan. It's a documentary about a political group that uses a fake religion to make real points. That's not the tagline, but it should be. Have y'all not heard about this at all?

All right, hail Satan. People love it. It's a great movie. Okay. I've also been re-watching all the Final Destinations. No, no, no, no, no. We're not going to let you talk about something else. You brought up that Hail Satan thing.

It's really good. All right. Hang on a second. I'm looking it up. Is there any deceptive cross-dressing in it? Quite a lot, actually. I don't know if you know satanic rituals,

but they don't conform to any norms. That's kind of their whole message. Are you going to join the satanic temple? I mean, do they have a lot of things

that encourage you to maybe sign up? I just saw a movie. It seems like it's a it's not kind of a recruitment film. No, not really. It says it's a look at the quick rise and influence of the controversial religious group known as the Satanic Temple.

Right. Well, I want to join that. Did I hide any of that information? Is there information at the end of the movie so you know where to go and sign up? No, it's not like a recruitment it didn't seem like it seemed like just a fun story about some some kids that like to wear black and mess with uh senators oh so they're not really that satanic no they don't believe why the question marks there in satan at all it's just all about uh equality of all religions, like that America was founded, that every religion

is equal here and it's not a Christian nation kind of thing. So whenever someone puts up, wow, I didn't make this movie. Guys. We're listening intently. You get to talk about whatever. I mean, you could

totally lie about the last movie you saw. There's no follow up. Where did you see it totally lie about the last movie you saw. We don't. I know. I tried to derail. Where did you see it? Prove it. Do you have a receipt? But it's an enjoyable movie is what I'm trying to drive at. It's a documentary. It's a really cool, interesting documentary that none of y'all are going to check out,

but you're going to tell people not to watch. Well, on the parent's guide on IMDDB, for sex and nudity... Neutery. Neutery. For sex and neutery, it says moderate. Yeah, and that's just the Detroit chapter, but y'all will see what that's all about. I'm sure. What's moderate nudity?

Shirts off. Oh, they get more specific. Oh, great. Full frontal male. What? That's moderate? Full frontal male and female nudity in some scenes. Some.

Right. Extreme is in all scenes. The rituals. The rituals and like the intermission where they make you get up and perform the. Oh, man. There is a picture of a man putting his scrotum on a gravestone. Again.

However... However... Can I say whose gravestone that is? Hang on a second. It says here the image is censored. Yeah, you're welcome. They blur out... Why bring that up as something that's in the movie

that would be objectionable if they blur it out in the movie? Because it's showing the newscast that, look, I was kind of involved in this film. Here's a fun guessing game for you. Who's Scrotum is it? Yeah, no. It's the leader

who has the name Lucian Graves. Oh, neat. Oh, that's not his real name. I don't know if y'all were wondering, but that's what it is. Gotta start off

satanic cold if your name's Lucian Graves. Yeah, pretty much. Why am I defending this? I've been re-watching the Final Destination series one through eight, so what do y'all got for that? No controversial opinions, one through eight. So what do you all got for that?

No controversial opinions, I'm sure. I want to talk about Hail Satan some more. All right. How many times, it actually lists how many times they use the word fuck in the movie. There's a counter in the corner. It's F asterisk asterisk K as written here because IMDB's for families.

But how many times do you think they say fuck? 120 times. You saw this movie? Yeah. They say it six times. Oh, okay. I'm just assuming it was high up.

Wait, did you... Are you confusing this with Goodfellas? I just thought that it would be notable like if they were gonna list how many times they said it, it wouldn't be six.

Oh, no. The parent's guide really breaks it down. Oh, we're looking at parental... Okay. Yeah, yeah. Okay, maybe

Hail Satan's not for kids. Hail Satan for kids, question mark? Unless your kid's, like, super cool. That'd be the only reason. Yeah, I mean, every kid, you know, has got a different... So, Dale, this is, of course, stop one of the Cannabis and Cheese Tour.

Oh, this is Boston, that's why. Sorry. It's all coming Boston. That's why. Sorry. It's all coming together for Cheeseman. Putting the pieces together. Yeah, and the final shows are going to be in D.C. with D.C. Dale Cheeseman. It's beautiful.

Some girl is really touched by that. Travel with us to every city, everybody. It's like the dead. Oh, my God. You know the Grateful Dead? The band? I wish. I wish people would just come to my shows and be like,

whatever you want to do is fine with us. If you want to jam for too long about any one thing, we don't care. Talk about Hail Satan all you want, Doug. I didn't want to. Try to stop. It's the same story that goes away. It's the only one you know.

Everybody! Like the morning sun, you come and like the wind, you go. We're supposed to know this song? Does this have a melody? The Grateful Dead. Oh, see, there you go.

You're just jamming, but with words. Do you go to dead shows? Nope. Can you tell? Sweet Caroline. Nope. Can you tell? Sweet Caroline. Well, after that musical interlude, this is the perfect time to say,

turn it off, Bert. Let the games begin! We've closed the curtain so that name tags can come out of the shadows Look at this you guys So many good ones to choose from So many bad ones as well Anything you want Go ahead and select a name tag

And while you guys do that We'll do this We'll be right back Hey everybody No sponsors this episode And while you guys do that, we'll do this. We'll be right back. Hey, everybody. No sponsors this episode. So I'd like to just take a moment to say two words. One city.

That's Fort Worth. I will be there on June 16th at 420 doing stand up with a special special guest i hear it's a really nice club i've never been to this new hyenas in fort worth i'm doing dallas the day before but it's this fort worth show that i'm worried about because ticket sales are how we say in the business, extremely light. So come on, Fort Worth. Make it worth my while. I'll make it worth your while by giving you a smile. What? All right.

Back to the show. All right, we're back. A lot of stuff happened while we were gone. Got some great name tags. The gentleman in the audience gave me more shit for the prize bag. I got a Dr. T and the woman, women, several women. Return to Me with David Duchovny, the great romantic comedy actor. And Marley and me.

Does Mr. Utley like Marley and me? Mr. Utley looks as dead as Marley right now. I'm sorry, but have you guys seen the Dog's Purpose movies? At least Marley and me, it's somewhat of a surprise.

So, Dale, you got so much stuff from somebody. Yeah. Who is this person? I don't know, but she... A fish Colleened Wanda. So her name's Colleen. Or Wanda. So her name's Colleen. Or Wanda. Or fish.

That'd be really weird to change the word called to Colleen if her name is Wanda. But there's a light up, what do you call those things when it scrolls by like that? LED scroll thingy. LED with the tour name. Yeah, it says. And a message about the cupcakes. Cannabis and cheese and cupcakes. And then Patron-infused

margarita cupcakes. Yeah! And Tito's-infused vodka gimlet cupcakes. So where were those guys that wrote their names on napkins? Do you see the effort that gets made? Don't waste our time.

Make stuff for us that will murder us. Make alcohol-infused candy. Desserts. And then there's a nice little J stuck on there with, what's this called? Velcro. I don't know words anymore. I forgot words.

How many cupcakes have you had? I haven't had any of these yet, but oh my goodness. But I picked it because she photoshopped my actual grandmother What? holding a bong.

How'd she get that photo of your grandmother with a bong? Check out Nana's legs. Good to see you. Your grandma has nice legs. That's why you picked it? Yeah. You're not into Cheez-Its, Cheetos, or Cheese Curls? No, I did it for Nana. Oh, Mike got a good one.

It's the Barbara Duke. Yeah. I liked it because there's a movie called The Baba Duke. Yes. That's what I thought it said because I couldn't see it. But Barbara Duke. Is your last name Duke? That'd be great.

Never mind, then. I still like it. Oh, Mazel Tov. I don't even know what he... You guys, they're married now to broken glass. The glass broke right when she introduced herself, so the whole audience got to go, Barbara. I've never seen the Babadook,

but does glass break when you say its name? That'd be great. I know bad things happen in that movie. I know that. Good job, Barbara. And what do you got there, Doogie? I have the silence of the Pams.

Pretty good one. How many Pams do you think? Looks like there's two on the poster. And Doug's head is on the little box. My face is on the bug on her mouth. What do you call those bugs that like light bulbs? Moths. Yep.

Velcro bugs. Because they will stick to it. All right. Good job, Pam. Excellent job, everybody. Oh, all ladies chosen tonight. Ladies. Yeah.

The future is female. And also there's other people. The bar is so low for men right now. Didn't even try. I got a round of applause. Thank you. No, thank you. Thank you for all you do.

Let's throw those alcohol cupcakes. Hey, one of these Fritos is saluting the women. Well, they have an interesting... I took a picture of it from Instagram. They have a note backstage that the insurance in this particular club does not allow you to chuck things into the audience. It's a specific... I don't think it was aimed at me, per se.

Because one of the other things on the list is no pyrotechnics, and I usually don't have any of those. Quick question, Doug. Does it say chuck in the language? No chucking? I think it says no tossing. I think you could chuck then. I'm no lawyer, but...

You got a really interesting legal angle there. Toss is gentle. Oh, I see. If we throw hard and overhand... Yeah. No lobbing. Then it's allowed. Softball rules.

But I think in this case, I think I speak for Dale and for all of us on stage that we're going to eat those cupcakes. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, that's too much effort's been made to just chuck them back into the crowd, but next show. All right.

I mean, does anyone have any trash homemade cupcakes? All right. Store-bought? No? That's cool. Let's start with a game called Purple Rain Man. Ooh, yeah. Haven't played that one in a minute.

It's a game where, you know, like the title Purple Rain Man, it's two titles mashed together. I'm going to name the stars of both movies, starting with third build, second build, first build, the two movies being the order being the order that the titles are smashed together. And first one to get it right wins. First one to figure out the puzzle. Only people on stage get to guess, please.

I don't know, we'll see, but I feel like some audience members will know it before the guys on stage, but you never know. I'm looking at you, Utley. Somebody recently said about this show, for the guys on stage, but you never know. MALE SPEAKER 1, I'm looking at you, Utley. MALE SPEAKER 2, Somebody recently said about this show that you're on stage trying to ask trivia questions, and you feel like the entire audience knows the answer. And that's true, but as soon as you get up here,

it does get harder. MALE SPEAKER 1, Can I ask you a quick question? MALE SPEAKER 2, Mm-hmm. MALE SPEAKER 1, Are you going to name the people, are these people in both movies? MALE SPEAKER 2, That's a quick question? Are you going to name the people Are these people in both movies? That's a great question That could happen But it's not required

Got it I understand Plus it doesn't matter who wins Thank you Plus we're all going to die someday So who gives a shit Probably different days Doesn't matter who wins. Thank you. We're all going to die someday, so who gives a shit? Really?

Probably different days. I hope. I hope so. Because I love going to funerals. I hope everyone dies on one day and Doug dies the next. For Doug. All right. In this movie mashup title,

the third billed people would be Ben Affleck and Eli Roth. Goodwill hunting for Forrester? It's finding Forrester. Never mind. Goodwill Hunting for Forrester? It's Finding Forrester. Yeah, never mind. Goodwill Finding

Forrester. Ooh, uh, no. Second build, Matt Damon

and Diane Kruger. Goodwill Hunting. Forrester. For Bobby Fisher. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. First build. Robin Williams. And Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt. What were the other two names of the second movie? Eli Roth and Diane Kruger.

You got this. Goodwill Huntingman. Raise your hand if you know it. They all know it. Must be nice. It must be nice. It must be nice to have Hamilton on your side. Nothing?

I can't play second. I like that we, none of us know it. That's nice. It is. It doesn't happen very often, but I thought when I wrote this one down, I thought this might be a stumper. And fortunately, we have other games to play.

Who said Good Will Hunting first of the three of you? Was it Mike or Dale? I haven't said a word. I'm staying the fuck out of this. I said it. I'm over here writing my next book. It was a dark and stormy night. I said it second,

but I said it more, I think. You said it over and over. You put more emphasis on it. I said it louder a lot. Is it Good Will Hunting? Is it Good Will Hunting? It's Good Will Hunting. All right, so I'm going to call Dale the unofficial winner of this game for being half right.

I'm not happy. Say it with me, everybody. Good Will Hunting, glorious bastards. Oh, I didn't know that was allowed. That is a huge stretch. It's not a stretch at all. It's how the game works. Well, it's a mashup of two titles

where you don't have to add any letters. You don't have to change anything. They mash together perfectly. In our defense, the example purple rain man only gives you the impression that it could only be word boundaries. Oh, I see. That tells you it could only be that.

I mean, it only does show you that. And you did ask questions before we played. I have another question. But yeah. Can we do another one? Yeah, that's true. It is called Purple Rain Man because it's one of the ones we've played,

but it's often like that. And people get it right. There's nobody that doesn't know Eli Roth and Brad Pitt and Diane Kruger. I was thinking Glorious Bastards, but I couldn't figure out how. So just say it in case that was the right answer. Okay.

I was thinking Centennial Man Inglourious Bastards. I was really thinking that. I was like, nah, it doesn't quite go together. Mrs. Doubtfire Bastards. I just kept thinking Hunting Brad Pitt. Hunting Brad Pitt. And then I went off on a weird fantasy. Yeah.

All right, you have a five-minute head start, Bradley. That'd be a good one. Mrs. Doubt Firestarter. Yeah. Oh, I'm Mrs. Doubt Firestarter. The icky Mrs. Doubt Fire... I want to see my kids now, but I'm not allowed to.

I want to see my kids now, but I'm not allowed to. Rights itself. All right. Well, I'll try to explain this next game better. It wasn't your fault. It was our fault. We were just being defensive. I agree.

It was a tough one. Probably too tough. In fact, it was too tough. Let's all go home. I'm going to take my piece of paper and go home. Let's play Whose Tagline Is It Anyway? Yeah, so Dale,

since you got Good Will Hunting Brad Pitt, I'm going to start with you. Lucky me. Yeah. All right. And then we're going to go to Mike and then to Doogie, and I'm just going to come to you one at a time with a tagline from a movie.

You get one guess. You're wrong. I move on to the next person. And, of course, the tagline could be anything from any kind of advertising for the movie, the poster, the trailer, commercials, et cetera. MALE SPEAKER 1 AND MALE SPEAKER 2, it's one whole movie name.

MALE SPEAKER 1 AND MALE SPEAKER 2, you have to say the full and correct title, but hopefully it'll just be the one. I haven't found any taglines yet that are for two different movies that taste great together. Dale, this first one is some people... Some people. Oh, I know that. some people some people

can never no pre-guessing some people can never believe in themselves until someone believes in them what do you think Dale? believes in them. What do you think, Dale?

I'm thinking about like a depressed Santa. What's the saddest Santa? Probably Fred Claus. There's that bad Santa also. Like a bad mood Santa. Yeah. Mike, it's not bad Santa also. Like a bad mood Santa. Yeah. Mike, it's not your turn yet. So don't guess any movies until it's your turn.

Because you might stumble into the right answer. Ruin everything. Well, I'm going to go with that answer for sure. Which one? What was it? What did I say? What was it? What did I say?

The No, I just had it and then I started thinking of bringing down the house and the two options and it's smarter to change your answer. Now I can only think of bringing down the house. He said Bad Santa. Bad Santa. Thank you. Okay. No. There's no way. Thank you. A movie no. There's no way. Thank you.

A movie about believing in yourself? Might have been sarcastic. They recut it to make it less problematic. It's dark music. Okay, Mike, what do you think it is? Oh, the same one? That's why I didn't want you to guess yet. Oh.

I thought we each have our own one. If Dale misses it, well, now you have your own one. Okay, I got it. Okay, so it's a movie about somebody who doesn't believe in themself until somebody does believe in them. Space Jam. There's like a bunch of characters that nobody believes in, but

but then you believe in them So Doogie gets a new one now? No, that one, that was incorrect Space jammiest bastards What do you think, Doogie? incorrect. Space jammiest bastards. What do you think, Doogie? This is a tough one. Life according to Garp?

The world according to Garp. Ooh. Interesting. Why'd you guess that? Robin Williams is in it and it's a strange tagline, and that's a strange movie. You think I knew ahead of time how much we'd talk about Robin Williams? You've got this all planned out.

You act like Goofy, but you know what's going on. That's the tagline for the film Good Will Hunting. Good Will Hunting. for the film Good Will Hunting. Ah! I was going to guess that, but I thought, no way. We just had it.

There's no way he would do that. Was he high when he wrote this? Sometimes the things right in your face are the hardest to see. Oh, I know that one. That one is... What do you got? That one's Space Jam. Pixelated

blurred balls on a tombstone. Alright, let's try another one. I feel like you guys are in a groove now. Definitely warmed up, for sure. Totally gonna nail this one. Dale, what movie had the tagline,

Welcome to the Bank Robbery Capital? The Town. Welcome to the Bank Robbery Capital of America. The Town. What's that? The Town. That is correct. Cheese Man.

Cheese Man. Cheese man. Hey, wait a minute. Hear that, high school bullies? I turned it around. Now I like hearing it. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, Doug.

Did you know that the town takes place near where we are right now? Uh-huh. And also Goodwill Hunting? I'm putting it all together. All right, you get to go first to this next round, Mike. Okay. Because Dale has a point. Okay.

He often does in conversation. Point means several things. Mike. Yes. If you can't beat him, steal him. Don't even know what that means. I think I do.

Really? Okay, well, it's not your turn yet. Quick clarification. Is it if you can't beat him? Um. Um. Apostrophe E-M. If you can't beat him.

Both times. Steal him? No, then the second time it's him. So I kept reading it going, is this right? That. If you can't beat him, steal him. Okay. I mean, I know it does make sense once you know the movie and what the movie's about.

Oh. But it's still a terrible tagline. So if you can't beat them like a collective, like the Borg, steal him, the one person. Never mind. If you can't, it's about a high stuff. Inside man. Inside job. Inside.

Inside man job? Yeah. All right, so you're out. Yeah, yeah. Well, I want to guess a TV show. Inside Man. Inside Man's not right. Thank you.

Doogie? Interspace? Oh. I mean, I don't know why we all thought that. Felt like a good tagline for Interspace. Did somebody get stolen in Interspace? No, I just don't know. I have no clue.

Okay, we're back to Dale. Desperately clawing. It's a national treasure? No. Yeah. If you can't beat them, steal Nicolas Cage. Well, that would be... No, if you can't beat the Constitution, steal it.

Or what is it, the Bill of Rights? What are they trying to steal? Well, he can't convince his friend to... I'm also re-watching the National Treasure. Are you watching everything that's had more than one part? I don't know if you've had Depression and Netflix, but... I mean, if it's

on... Wow, you took Netflix and chill and totally flipped it. Netflix and anxiety. Sad and Netflix. What are you doing tonight? Oh, sad and anxiety. Sad and Netflix. What are you doing tonight? Oh, sad and Netflix.

Okay, so in this movie, there's a team that's very good that can't be beat. So another team takes their best players. So if you can't beat them, steal him. And the movie's called... Guy in the audience says it's Celtic Pride. Oh. Or Celtic, if you're really...

If you're really into having fun. My next guess was gonna be Demolition Man, which shows you how close I was. You were right there, dude. All right. Mike, it's you again finally what movie has the tagline based on the novel

by Henry James based on the novel by Henry James so just go through his novel yeah yeah yeah. Is the movie called Boston? No, Doogie. The Turn of the Screw? No, Dale.

The hell? Nothing. No, nothing. No. National Treasure 2. I refuse to answer. Full title. You got this.

Thanks, man, but I don't. You can let that dude down. So I'm in the process, which means I've rewatched the first half of the first one like six times. Oh, yeah. So you haven't seen past the colon in the second one which means I've rewatched the first half of the first one like six times. Oh, you haven't seen... So you haven't seen past the colon in the second one. No, I don't like... You've only seen the word national. Do not read ahead.

I think it's a book of secrets. Is that right? Yeah, a book of secrets. Okay, so it was pretty low stakes. Chamber? No, it's a book. I wish. Harry Potter 2, 2 Harry, 2 Potter.

No, this one is called The Bostonians. I wish. Harry Potter 2, 2 Harry, 2 Potter. No, this one is called The Bostonians. I was real close. You were so close. Only this crowd would be like, obviously. All right, here's an easy one, Mike. Yes. We're going to put you on the board with this one. We'll see about that.

All right. Brothers, period. Killers, period. Saints, period. Is now, okay, I'm pretty sure. I think I have it. I think I might. If I don't get it, will everyone in this audience turn into killers of me?

Is it Boondock Saints? Yes, it is. Yeah. Now that's what I call Celtic pride. I know a movie. Eight people in the audience hold up their hand tattoo. Yay. It was a good idea.

tattoo. It was a good idea. Okay, so Doogie, since you didn't get any so far in this game, we just have one left to go. We gotta decide, we gotta break the tie, so we're gonna, you have to sit this one out. Okay. I know. It's sad. I've basically been sitting it

out this whole time, so. Just keep doing what you're doing. It won't be hard for me. Stay the course, Doogie. You got this. So we'll start with you, Dale. And if you don't know it, then it'll go to Doogie. I mean, sorry, to Mike.

Nice try. Ooh. Doogie, I'll play for you also as the Baba Doog. The Barbara Doog The Barbara Doog Barbara Doog I didn't get your joke Alright I drew on my hand But I got it off

Alright Full disclosure What happened to that part of the podcast? People at home need to know. I washed my hands, so the podcast is going to be a little bit shorter. Here we go. Dale.

What movie has a tagline? Why did 13 women willingly open the door to the Boston Strangler? Is it the Boston Strangler? That is correct! That is correct! Can I make a guess too? Mike, I earned that one.

My guess is The Departed. Did you guys know the original title of that Netflix show, 13 Reasons Why? It was 13 Reasons Why You Should Open the door to the Boston Strangler. Reason one, maybe it's FedEx. Reason two, your friend is coming over. Reason three, why not? Reason four. Reason three was why not?

Why not? Reason four, I like the Strangler. Seems early on the list. All right, so Dale won that game. But we all know that the early games are just for fun. And the shit gets serious. Sorry. Colleen was getting excited. Oh.

I had the prize bag. Oh, Colleen just thought it was hers. She's not even watching the show anymore. Just eyes on the bag the whole time. I'm sorry. I got all serious during that game. I didn't even watching the show anymore. Just eyes on the bag the whole time. I'm sorry. I got all serious during that game. I didn't know that was just fun. Oh, yeah. No, no.

It's about time to get serious now. Okay, here we go. Yeah, because we're going to really decide this thing with a game everybody loves called Last Man Stanton. We get people from the audience that are involved in this. A few people have reached out to me

with suggestions for a name to use in this game. And the basic idea is we're going to get a name. I like to play along. We'll get a name of an actor or actress, and we'll take turns saying movies are in. You can't think of one. You're out. You got your lifeline.

Is your person on your name tag. You can go to that lady once. And if she can't help you, but only if she can't help you, then you can take out your cell phone and call a celebrity. That's fun. From Boston?

Left my phone in the green room like a professional. Boston celebrities only. Yeah, okay. Local calls only. I can't pay for long only. Yeah, okay. Local calls only. I can't pay for long distance. Yeah, no, that makes sense. Hello, Larry Bird?

Oh, you're shooting free throws? Okay, I'll call back. He's making a movie called Free Throws? Yeah. So... Thanks. When someone doesn't believe that you're Larry Bird, Larry Bird believes in free throws.

Yeah, it doesn't usually work. Usually it goes to voicemail, but we've got Nick Swartzen on the phone one time and Bob Saget. Oh. Yeah, so you never know. Can I call you? Oh, that's...

I wish you hadn't brought... If you'd have just done it, I would have accepted it. Ah, shit. But now you're giving me a chance to think about it, and I don't like it. Okay.

Because now, once you've thrown it out there, any one of the three of you could call me, and I'll probably know... They don't have your number. I might know the answer. Doogie did contact you for me.

You guys don't have my digits? I don't know. I only give them out to people with names similar to mine, Doogie. contact you for me. You guys don't have my digits? I don't know. I only give them out to people with names similar to mine, Doogie. Yeah, bro. D-Club. I only give them to people with nicknames I'm glad I don't have.

No, I love calling you. I love that you're Doogie. I just don't want, you know, when people call me Doogie, I'm like, it's Douglas. Douglas. Okay, so where is RW? Oh, dude!

Super close. And it's A-R-E-D-U-B-Y-A because his name is Randy Williams. It's RW. Yeah, I figured that out. And then I went back to bed. Randy, what do you do for a living? I'm a tech support guy.

I'm a tech support guy, he says. Okay, let's go down the line. Do we believe him? Doogie does not believe you. Mafia. Until you asked if I believed him I was doing nothing but believing him All you gotta do is put a little suspicion on somebody

What do you think, Dale? He's holding eye contact like this is the first time in a while So yeah I believe him like this is the first time in a while, so yeah. I believe him. Tech guy's day out. Oh, hello. Hi.

Hi. Every tech guy. People usually don't speak to me unless it's something mean. Interfacing with other humans. All right, dude. What's your suggestion? The great Michelle Pfeiffer is his suggestion. That guy's a fan. Now, I like to try to keep this fair for everybody,

because sometimes there's blind spots for people. So yes or no to Michelle Pfeiffer or Doogie? No. Okay, Mike? Yeah. And Dale? No. All right.

Oh, do you all want this to be over immediately? It wouldn't hurt. So do I win it? Oh, shit. immediately wouldn't hurt so do I win oh shit there's at least a few people in here that are pretty excited about going outside getting high does that mean that I win that round yeah yeah for being the only one willing to play no no what happens is since we since the vote went against Michelle she's gonna be one of two names. So you can still say the films of Michelle Pfeiffer,

but we're going to get a second name from an audience member who goes by Smart Overcoat. Woo! He's the guy that loved Michelle Pfeiffer. Oh, he's doubling down. We're going to have to do it. What's your name, Smart Overcoat? Ben. And what do you do for a living?

I'm a librarian. He's a librarian. Definitely lying. Librarian starts with lie. You are. You're a magician. Stand up and show the audience how magician-like you look.

Yeah. He looks a lot like a magician. You're the guy from the documentary I saw. A different one, not about Satanism. Hail Ben. All right, Ben, what's your suggestion? George Clooney. George Clooney, the Cloons. I like it.

Nobody gets to say whether they like it or not. It's in stone now. I'm stoned now. So those are the two names. You've got to name films featuring Michelle Pfeiffer or George Clooney. We'll start with Dale. Then we'll go to me. Then Doogie.

Then Mike. And when you can't think of one, go to your lifeline. Don't say the wrong, you know what I mean? Don't say a title that's wrong, if you can help it. So part of this game is try not to be wrong. Uh-huh. Ah. Yeah.

Don't be wrong out loud. Be wrong up here. Make smart choices. Don't hit yourself in the head with a pen that's open. I'm excited. Dale? Scarface? Starring Michelle Pfeiffer?

Hmm? Yeah. You turned her down. Because that's the one I know. Okay. Scarfacha. I didn't know she was in that. Scarface. She's the one I know. Okay. Scarfacha. I didn't know she was in that. She's the lady. She's Scarface.

And she nails it. She's good. She's Mrs. Scarface. Is there a Mrs. Scarface? Say hello to my little friend, Mrs. Scarface? Say hello to my little friend, Mrs. Scarface. My little girlfriend.

Okay. I'm going to go with, I'll stay with Michelle Pfeiffer. I don't give a fuck. You stay over there and then give me George Clooney. You guys do all the obvious ones. I'll say the ones, you know, I'll pick ones. I'll say the ones. I'll pick the titles. I'll find the ones.

I'm going to find what lies beneath. Dukes. Batman Returns. It's true. George Clooney is the penguin. Oh, no, that's not true. The penguin has nipples.

Mike. Up in the air. Thank you so much. Ocean's Eleven. air. Thank you so much. Oceans 11. Oh, we're going to do that? Yeah. Let me pass you this can of worms. I'm happy to take

Oceans 12. Doug just bragged about doing all the hard ones, but okay. I'll get away with that. Doogie. Ocean's 13. Mike. Okay.

I can do it. You got this. Yeah, I definitely. Pfeiffer, Clooney. Oh, yeah. They made seven movies together. What? I'm sorry.

I meant they've both been in a movie that has Batman in the title. Dangerous Minds. Yes. Very good. Coolio. You're clearly going to win this game. What?

You're clearly going to win this. I can't win. It has to be one of you guys. He's like the computer. You could. Exactly. You could try to beat me, but it's more about beating each other. Well, if you could win,

you'd be unstoppable. Hail Caesar. That's what I say. Oh! Well, since it laid out there for a couple of people and nobody picked it up, I'm going to go ahead and say Batman and Robin. I forgot which one it was.

I didn't want to say. Yeah, I confused the Val Kilmer ones. Oh, yeah. That's Batman Forever and just the one. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, brother, where art thou? I am.

Perhaps the brother art in Syriana? The brother might be getting tortured somewhere. I don't know if that's a place, but I know it's the name of a movie. Okay, Dale? He actually came back from Syriana, and he's been here for a few months and he just got his citizenship.

He's the American. Happy ending, huh? Oh, man. I'm going to take this quiz. I mean, these things I'm writing down. You know what I'm going to do with them later? I don't want to know. I'm going to do with them later? I don't want to know. I'm going to burn after reading.

That is intolerable cruelty, Doug. I will not tolerate such cruelty. It is intolerable. Now, what if I knew a movie with Mekhi Pfeiffer? Well, for starters, we'd all be impressed. But then we would go, that's not right. Unless he's in a movie with Michelle. Ooh, that'd be so great.

I think it is time for... Really? You're ready for your lifeline? I mean, how long can I sit and think? Well, let me just refresh your memory. Okay. That George Clooney is an actor. Yeah. Very good one.

Yeah. From ER. Oh, yeah. Roseanne. Mm-hmm. Eve rosanne even facts of life that's right if this was doug loves tv we'd be probably doing better no he's actually made lots more movies and then you know of course michelle pfeiffer oh yeah she's done a lot definitely maybe top two of all catwomans ever i don't know though there's been some there's two of all Catwomans ever. I don't know though. There's been some good Catwomans.

Yeah, there's been more than two now. Oh yeah, there was three just in the old Batman TV show. Hell, four.

The next number. I think there were 12. All right, let's go to Barbara. Barbara. Because also, you might think of some stuff later after using your lifelines. Oh yeah, 100%. Let's go to Barbara. Barbara. Because also, you might think of some stuff later after using your lifelines.

100%. Let's see what Barbara's got. The Descendants. The Descendants. That's correct. Very good. Dale. I can do this all night,

which is to say from dusk till dawn. Oh. do this all night, which is to say from dusk till dawn. Oh! I just want to say that no matter which one of you wins, I think all of you, I think of you as three kings. Yeah!

Yeah! As Three Kings. Yeah. Yeah. You're my lifeline. Charlie presents. I need my lifeline. Where's Pam at? Don't be silent.

Silence of the Pams. You got one for me, don't you, Pam? White Oleander. White Oleander. White Oleander. God damn. I'm impressed you can even pronounce that movie title. Thank you, Pam.

The Kai Pfeiffer was just in O and she was in Oleander. Okay. Michelle Pfeiffer is a... Did that help you at all? What's that? Did that help?

Like, that round? Did you get some ideas? Yeah. I definitely now remember three more movies that you guys just said. I was like, oh, yeah. Three Kings is correct. Yep.

That would have been great to think about. Some people are great at just sitting around going, oh yeah, Three Kings is correct. Yep. That would have been great to think about. Some people are great at just sitting around going, oh yeah. That is right. I'd like to call a celebrity. Well, your lifeline helped you. Okay, I like your attitude. Who cares? Yeah, I mean, I think we all feel like Mike's going to lose no matter what, so.

Let him call three celebrities. Let's go ahead and let him call somebody. You want to call somebody? Yeah. Who are you going to call? I guess I have to pick like the most famous person in my phone? Is that? Most famous person that you think will actually pick up.

Okay. Because we really want to hear this call. Okay. Do you know Adam Bush? I love that. She's like, no, not Adam. All the its members get to decide. No.

Don't tell him I'm here. I do know Adam Bush, but I don't. This audience. You made it all the way to the B's, huh? No, he puts him in my first name. He's on the A's. What do you think? Who do you think you could call?

I mean, I'd accept a call to Adam Bush. Who is Adam Bush? He was on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. He's on a new show. He is? Yeah. What's it called? I don't know.

Catchy name. He's in a new show. He is? Yeah. What's it called? I don't know. Catchy name. He's my friend. That's a great name for a TV show. I don't know. How about... People are telling each other about it. What's that show you like? I don't know.

Oh, yeah. Green Light. Green Light. You have a studio now? Yeah, yeah. Ask me what the name of my studio is. What's the name of your studio? I don't know.

How about... I don't know how about I don't know productions do you guys know MC Paul Barman wait what is happening do you have do you have any celebrities in there

Doug I'm not as famous as you so I mean I don't I don't have to call anybody call Jeff Tate oh you know what do you want me to call anybody call Jeff Tate do you want me to make a call on your behalf

I'd love you to we're calling Sinbad let's do it who should I call who would pick up when I call them Mark Wahlberg hey real quick No, who should I call? Who would pick up when I call them? Mark Wahlberg. Hey, real quick, I have it.

Do you have the numbers of George Clooney or Michelle Pfeiffer? That'd be super chill if you had that. I so wish. I'm going to call somebody that I think will pick up. Just wait. Okay, here we go. And you guys will recognize the voice when you hear it, I think. That's my plan.

Let's see if it works. Hello, it's me, Sean Connery. Clint Eastwood here. Don't you regret that? It got so quiet. FaceTime? I don't want to do FaceTime. I just want to call like a normal person.

Doesn't want to do FaceTime. Michael Shannon. What the fuck? Come on. Oh, what would you... What did you want to hear? My outgoing message? No, no, no. I'm doing a show.

And it's my turn to call a celebrity. Why can't I see you? I thought you were FaceTiming me. I started off as FaceTime. But then I thought, well, that's weird. Because the phone's going to be really close to my face. Because I'm holding it into the microphone. I'm in Boston.

And we're playing a game where we need the title of a Michelle Pfeiffer movie or a George Clooney movie but one that we haven't said already that's right what was that called This could not have gotten better. I can tell. All right. Michelle Pfeiffer movie. No, she's asking other people.

What's that? Oh. I'm sorry. Am I not supposed to talk? No, yeah, go. Batman? They've both been in a Batman movie. But that's not what it's called.

Anything else? The movie they're in together? It doesn't have to be them together. It doesn't have to be them together. Just any movie with either of them. The one with Harrison Ford where he gives her a pill to make her not be able to move in the tub

and then she uses her toes. Yeah, What Lies Beneath. Yeah! We already said that one. What else you got? Scarface We already said Scarface It's tough

Witches of Eastwick Yeah Thank you Sarah Bye Thank you, Sarah. Bye. Bye. I should have asked her if she had anything to plug. Are you asking who that was? It was Sarah Silverman. Okay.

This guy, he was going to blow up if we didn't clarify. All right, so Mike's still in it. Barbara's still in it. Good job, Mike. What do you got, Dale? The men who stare at goats. Yes. God, I can't believe this is one fine day.

That's the one with Clooney and Pfeiffer. Yeah. Back to you, Mike. No, it's Doogie. Isn't Doogie out? You can... I wasn't, but now I am. I got nothing. You're done?

Yeah, I got nothing. Okay, Dale? South Park, Bigger, Longer, and Uncut. Oh. Very good. Did you use any product? Up here? No hairspray?

Yeah, we skipped Mike. It's just between me and Dale now. He's going to his lifeline Grease 2 She says Grease 2 Very good Dale, do you know the full title? Of Grease 2? You just said it

It's Grease 2 That was back when they didn't fuck with colons as much. And they thought Grease 2 was enough. Okay, I see what we're doing here. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Show's gonna be over soon. It'll be dark soon, too. And then we'll all go into the night.

Dale? Doug could just make up movies at this point. Not in front of this crowd. I couldn't. No! No Adam Bush! He's really good. He's great. I like him a lot.

What do you got, Dale? Was he the Descendants? Did we say that one? We said that one. Okay. When you think of Michelle Fiver, do you think of her more as a lady

or a hawk? That's a weird question. What a strange question. It's like you already have to know. That doesn't help. Oh, she was just in Murder on the Orient Express. Murder on the Orient Express. You're so good at this.

Counts. Dale Cheeseman is our winner! I'm into this. Man. Congratulations, Colleen. There you go. Don't let that dog get in there. There's some vodka and stuff in there.

Be careful. That was exciting. Do you want all the cheese things on your thing? There's a movie called John Michael or something. Michael Clayton. Michael Clayton. All right. There we go.

Oh, man, if you got that one, you would have won. I know. Michael Clayton. All right. There we go. Oh, man, if you got that one, you would have won. I know. Michael Clayton.

Doogie Horner, what have you got to plug? You know, mention your book again, of course. Yeah, my first novel is coming out this Monday, June 4th. It's called This Might Hurt a Bit, so please check it out. This Might Hurt a Bit, so please check it out. Talk to Colleen if you want a loaner. If you want to borrow it from her, she's got a copy. Mike Kaplan, what do you got to plug? My podcast is called Broccoli and Ice Cream,

and you can watch my special Small Dork and Handsome on Amazon, and my other albums are on the places where albums are. And I'll have a new one out. I just recorded it later this year. I just recorded it later this year. It's a time travel themed thing. Thank you for... It'll be called All Killing Aside.

And that'll be fun. Thanks. The end. Thank you. Dale Cheeseman, promote yourself. If I can play by those rules, I also will have an album at some point.

I don't have a title or the jokes for it yet, but you know, eventually. I'm in New York. Come out to all the free shows I'm on out there. It's a fun time. I'm on a podcast called The Whiskey Brothers. They're based out of Texas.

And then I do goofy characters at the end of it from New York. Last week I interviewed Pablo Escobar's hippo, hip-blop, escoblop. It's very dumb. Just check that out. How'd you get them? Huh? How'd you get that guest? It was satellite.

Oh, okay. Yeah, you can't just fly a hippo. What a fool. But yeah. Cool. We'll see you tomorrow in Providence, where we'll be doing a stand-up show, but we'll play some Last Man Standing with audience members and Doug Loves Movies is gonna be back after this

tour I'll be back at UCB in Los Angeles on Tuesday June 11th thank you for coming out today it was looking like it was going to be a beautiful day. So I felt bad making you come inside. And then the weather turned to shit and it all worked out great. Yeah. You won. What's happening?

She's trying to get more. She wants to show that. She wants to see the other side. Flip it over real quick. Just flip it over. What happened? Oh, it says positive. Yeah, I read that earlier, didn't I?

Oh, positive energy for the bees to take the Stanley Cup. The bees. Oops. There you go. Yeah, go bees I think I do yeah I'm not a sports guy

I'm not a sports guy I'm not a Bruin the Boston bees but anyway thank you to Laugh Boston and again to everybody for coming out and listening to the show and we'll hang out in the

lobby area for meet and greet afterwards and as always not just for sports teams positive energy Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky There's no room in his heart for you Cause Doug loves movies