Doug Loves Movies - Dan Fogler, Elliott Kalan, Doogie Horner and Jesse Pasternack guest

Episode Date: June 10, 2015

Live from the Irving Plaza in NYC, Doug welcomes Dan Fogler, Elliott Kalan, Doogie Horner and Jesse Pasternack to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies! Hey, hey, hey, everybody! My name is Doug, and I love movies! This is I Love Movies! Coming to you once again from Irving Plaza in New York City! coming to you once again from Irving Plaza in New York City! Every time I come here after the show, I'm like,

I wish those people had some enthusiasm. It's pathetic. It's Tuesday, June 9th, 2015, which happens to be the release date of my new CD, my new comedy recording that I made on 420. Fucking high out of my mind, so I don't even know what's on it. It's called

Promotional Tool, and here's some physical copies. The winner tonight is going to get one, so I'll set one aside. And these other six copies is going to get one, so I'll set one aside. And these other six copies are going to get hurled into the audience. Yeah. So watch your eyes, because they got pointy corners. And you never know when I'm going to throw one!

Oh my, I can't even watch it going into the crowd. Somebody just put a bag of Dunkin' Donuts on the stage. Like, let's not fuck around with waiting to see if the donut name tag gets chosen. Let's just put it on the goddamn stage. It's the only reason we're here. Through that horrible incident with the lady and the bat at the baseball game I can't believe you guys are encouraging me Here comes another one

Oh it's so violent No way I'm going to try for the balcony In this joint I'll hit a chandelier and it'll fall on somebody's head and then people will go, I heard Phantom closed. I always like jokes to end with, and somebody will go

and then what they said. And she's over there with the, mm. Alright. Alright. And she's over there with the... All right. All right. Let me see your name tags, you guys. I'm going to throw my CDs at my favorite name tags. Inside Mike. Here, give it to Inside Mike.

He deserves it. That's a good one. That's very topical. Oh, look at that. There's Otto from Airplane. And what's your name? Sarah. And where's your name on there?

Does it say right there instead of Air... Sarahplane! Oh! Pass that over to her, please. That sucks to get hit in the face with one of these and then have to pass it. Doesn't seem fair. Well, Devin always comes from forever.

Do you have it yet already? Okay, there you go. You can have one. And I'm just going to wing one far, far to the back. As far as I can. I'm excited about it. All right, I'll try the balcony. Be ready down here.

I got... Oh! It's not right. It's not right, you guys. If you didn't catch one in the face tonight, be sure to get one from iTunes or a special thing, records.com. Minneapolis.

Douglas Movies returns to the Women's Club of Minneapolis. It's an interesting place to do the show. On Friday, June 19th, Portland, Oregon, Douglas Movies returns to Helium. It's a gas on Sunday, June 21st. And Tempe, Arizona gets to Douglas Movies 2 at the Improv on Wednesday, July 1st. DouglasMovies.com. Thanks to Megan Hilty for hooking me up

with tickets for last night's Bombshell concert. Yeah, smashing concert. It was really, really awesome. And coincidentally, I'm excited to say that I have a guest on the show tonight who I saw for the very first time in a Broadway show. Yeah, a Tony winner is here tonight. And we've got in the prize bag Star Wars Minute T-shirt. In your face, another Star Wars Minute T-shirt.

We've got a weird koozie thing from Hangout Festival. You put on a beer. I got my last album, Gateway Doug 2. Now I got a new album. I gotta really get rid of all these old ones. Got some gum from backstage. Sticker.

A shirt someone gave. I had a great time at the Limestone Comedy Festival, and this is a t-shirt that says Bloomington on it, it's one size too small for me so that's out, oh there's my lighter, I'm going to put that in my pocket I was wondering where that went

and all the guests are going to bring out prizes that they are going to contribute to the bag let's give a big warm welcome to Jesse Pasternak, Ellie and Kaylin, Doogie Horner, and Dan Fogler. I've always wanted to win the Pete Holm Award, but I know it's such a difficult award to get, and so many great people have been nominated,

and I know that's a lot of politics, and it's like, who you know? It's not just like... And so, but I feel like someday... Pete who? Full title, please. Holmesford. Holmes. That's what I said. Oh, I thought you said Holm.

No, singular. Pete Holm. No, just me. Pete Holm. That's Doogie Horner, everybody. Thank you. I'm always... Somebody must have, at some comedy show, at some point, introduced you as Doogie Howser. Because you're right there.

You're saying, ha. And you're going to just fucking blow it, right? Is it just me? I get Doogie Homer, because the R and the N together look like an M. So sometimes people say Doogie Homer. MCs at the N together look like an M. So sometimes people say Doogie Homer. MCs at all your shows are reading it off of a card?

And nobody notices it, yeah. Well, I hand them a typewritten card to make sure they don't fuck it up, and then they do it anyways. Doogie Homer. And nobody minds. Or notices. As a previous guest on the show, you know that you've got to bring something for the prize bag. And it's so valuable, you put it right down there on the floor.

What do you got for us? I got an Alfred E. Newman bobblehead. Mad Magazine bobblehead. And I have a kids book I illustrated, Kid Presidents. It's true stories about the presidents when they were kids. Taft was still a fat fuck.

Still a fat kid. So, maybe a little young for you, but if you have a younger sister or brother... Use your microphone, boys. It's Dan Fogler, first time guest, everybody. First time sandal wearer on the show.

You did all the art on this? Don't kick that drink over. Oh, I'm sorry, brother. It's alright. Did I just make a whole mess over here? No, I think we're alright. It's the stool. I'm just like, I hurt my back earlier. Oh, well, that's what I say to a lot of the places I play. I'm like, the guests probably don't want to sit out here for 90 minutes

on a stool with no back. Yeah, it's not fair. I'm just kidding. My back is okay. I'm just thinking about... I'm just thinking... Oh, God. What'd you bring for the prize bag, dude?

Oh, fuck. Right, yeah. No, I got to get off the stool. I want to get the rest of the back stick. Oh. No, I got to... I mean, doesn't everybody need a chiropractor? Yeah.

Well, that's why I have a medical marijuana license in California Because I have a week back since about a week back What did you bring for the bag? I'm in Brooklyn, so we need that here This is my graphic novel, Moon Lake And I'll sign it I can sign it Oh, okay

And give it to people. Here, catch this Sharpie. Ready? And you're like, oh, shit. I knew you had good reflexes, ping pong master. Holy shit, it's already been signed. By you or someone else? No, by me.

Todd McFarlane. Yeah, I wish it was Todd. So it's signed and we're good to go? I guess when someone gets it later, I'll sign it personally to them. Oh, that's fair. Here you go, brother. Very nice.

I'll need that Sharpie back, though. Yeah, I should have thrown it. I've always got a Sharpie on me because if I don't, people will walk up to me and they'll go here sign my hat with this golf pencil it's a very literate bag tonight with these two books in here

I usually don't have fucking books messing everything up weighing down the bag there's a lot of pictures in those books. Yeah, they're picture books. I like it. Let's meet the rest of our guests. Another first-time guest on the show, everybody. Elliot Kalin is here. Thank you. Thank you very much for having me.

Thanks very much. His stuff is damp from Dan Fogler and his shenanigans. We got some front row napkins. Everything's coming together. That was a real community coming together to build a church at the end of a McCabe and Mrs. Miller moment. It totally was. That comic is wet.

We got to dry it. Someone in the audience, get some napkins. On stage, use your shirt. We're a community now. The only thing is, it wasn't... Did you say an Altman movie? Did you just make an Altman movie reference? Technically. Yeah.

Everyone wasn't talking over each other during that, so it wasn't very Altman-esque. But you are one of the threesome on the Flophouse podcast. Yes. Very popular film podcast where you talk about

the greatest movies of all time. That flopped. Now, there's rumors on the internet that you guys recently discussed

Mordecai on an episode. Mordecai. And you, by the end of it, you had Stockholm Syndrome and kind of liked Mordecai. And you... By the end of it, you had Stockholm Syndrome and kind of liked Mordecai. Yes. That is some fucked up shit.

I mean, I haven't seen it, but there's no way that could be a pleasurable experience. Oh, I didn't say it was pleasurable. But it's fun to talk about it afterwards. Yeah, well, you kind of like it in the way that you like something that hurts, but you're stronger afterwards.

Don't like that at all, because generally when things on me hurt, they are not stronger afterwards. It lingers for a lifetime. One more guest to introduce, and then we'll move into the next section of the... Oh, what'd you bring for the bag? Should I give you mine for the prize? That's okay. I'm continuing the bag? Sorry. For the prize. That's okay. That's fine. What'd you bring? What? I'm continuing the bringing comics theme.

I like it. This is a copy. A comic book won the Tony last night for Best Musical. That's true. Called Fun Home. Not this one. Unfortunately. No, this one was a flop on Broadway, but still stuck around long enough to make back a little bit of their money.

We moved it a couple blocks over to see if it would be eligible for the OBs, but didn't get in for that either. The OBs, I like how you pronounce that. You can always reboot it in like five years and it'll probably do just as well. Yeah, sure. Did you watch the Tonys? And what's your comic book?

So this is a book called Spider-Man and the X-Men number one That I wrote last year And I signed it too Lowering the value by at least a dollar and a half Collector's item Who would you like to see be the new Amazing

Hugh Jackman said he's not going to do Wolverine anymore Who should be the new Wolverine? De Niro. Okay, old Wolverine. I was going to say, yeah, Lance Henriksen. Very old Wolverine. Yeah. Oh, what about...

Are you looking at Wolverine? Tom Hardy? I guess so, but isn't he getting everything? Yeah, fucking just Tom Hardy. We're just going to divvy it all up between Chris Pratt and Tom Hardy? I love them both, but come on. Sam Levine. Sam Levine, of course.

That's the answer right there. Correct answer. And in addition to that, this is... This is going to be the smartest prize bag we've ever fucking had. You guys are a bunch of... This is a VHS called Reflections on Citizen Kane. Which you'll notice

it's still wrapped because I have in the 20 or so years I have it, I've never watched it. Or you're good at re-wrapping. Oh, that's... Those are both fantastic things for the prize bag. Applaud if you have access

to a VHS machine. Wow! Wow, that's... I had no idea! It's a movie crowd. They love film, and you want to see it in its most pristine condition.

I have a LaserDisc player, so... It's VHS or Betamax. I'm one to talk. And, uh... We might have saved the best for last, you guys. The youngest ongoing guest on Doug Lowe's movies.

We met him in Traverse City, Michigan. He competed last Christmas here in New York. It's Jesse Pasternak, everybody! Home for the summer from school in Bloomington, Indiana. My mom calls it Bloomies. You just were, too.

Yeah, I was just there. I was getting limestone. So what are you up to? So first year of college under your belt? Yep, it was a great year. Oh, thank you. You didn't get any drunken brawls downtown? No, I was very lucky.

I was very lucky to be a reasonable individual who mostly did my studies, watched a lot of movies. Yeah, occasional TV show, you know, to get a little of the wild energies out. But I'm also entering at the Paley Center, which is a wonderful place. If you love TV at all, you should definitely go. And, ah, thank you.

And you can watch this stuff on Yahoo. It's wonderful. That's awesome. Yeah. And then you're back to Bloomington in August. Yep.

Very nice. And you brought this very thoughtful guest, you guys. Tell them what you brought. Well, today is Natalie Portman's 34th birthday,

so I brought her Black Swan and Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium her best and silliest film let's play Fuck, Marry, Kill with Natalie Portman in Black Swan Natalie Portman in Mr. Magorium and Dustin Hoffman

in Mr. Magorium at a later date let's play that at a later date but that's a fun date. You win. So, but that's a, that's a fun, and those are on the, does anybody here

have a DVD player? They're on those, those old things. Less people. So, all that stuff is in the bag. Some lucky hoarder

is going to go home with all of it. Holy shit. I'm not even going to put your comic book into it Dan because it's so heavy

it's going to go right through this laundry bag Kid Presidents is going to hang out outside too yeah just keep them like this here's your winnings very organized nice Doogie and can I say how much I appreciate having someone around Nice Doogie

Yo And can I say how much I appreciate having someone around named Doogie Because it's my least favorite version of nickname for me People use it, I'm always like People call you Doogie? Every once in a while, yeah That's weird, sometimes people call me Doug Benson And have you been to the movies lately, Doogie?

The last movie I saw was this weird German movie called The Strange Little Cat or The Weird Little Cat? I can't remember what the translation was. We've got a strange. Oh, we've got a fan. Somebody says strange. Uncle Tom's Strange Little Cabin. Yes. Garfield the movie. that's what it was

no it's this German film and there's no traditional narrative and it all takes place in this apartment and just the camera kind of

follows around this family and people come in and go out is it from the perspective of the cat? no regular height perspective? the title's kind of a red herring it's not really about the cat? No. Regular height perspective? The title's kind of

a red herring. It's not really about the cat, which I was pretty upset about. You know what that cat loves? Red herring. You gave me all the time in the world to get that one, and I still...

You threw me a big, fat softball, and I came nowhere close to hitting it well that sounds like a movie none of us will watch yeah you'll never thank you very much for the warning for something none of us will even be aware of i didn't even i didn't even hear the title correctly was it it was german well the real title is probably like derschlaufenheben i don't know oh the one with the cat, yeah. But it's not about

a superhero, so don't worry. What about you, Jesse? What's the last movie you saw? The last movie I saw was Ides of March because it's been a while

since I've seen any House of Cards. It's a really good movie. George Clooney directed it. He's jonesing for some House of Cards. I need it. Let's just plug in

any old political thriller. Fucking get my Jones on. I need more Bo Willington. And it's a perfect Pete Holmes movie, because the last minute or so of the film is just a close-up of Ryan Gosling's face. And I know he's a big Gosling fan, so if he ever wants, you know,

it's sitting right up his alley. I'll try to pass that along to Pete. I'll tell Pete Holmesm all about it. Elliot, what about you? The last movie I saw was called The Visitor, and it was not the Richard Jenkins The Visitor. It was the one from 1979 that has John Huston and Shelley Winters and Lance Henriksen,

and I think Kareem Abdul-Jabbar appears in a basketball scene. And it's... Suddenly I'm interested. And it's all, it's this mashup of, like, The Omen and Star Wars. Oh, and Franco Nero is in it as a space Jesus Christ.

I was watching the whole time. I was like, this movie feels so Italian. And then I found out everyone who made it was Italian. And they just shot it in America. I'm glad you were able to pick up that vibe, though. Nothing in this movie really makes that much sense, but it looks beautiful. This must be an Italian movie.

Or something by Sofia Coppola. Yeah. Wow. I would have said Roman Coppola if I thought of it quickly enough Because his movies seem very Italian Dan Didn't mean to scare you

What did I do? What did I say? What did I see? I did a double I did a double header the What? I did a double. I did a double header the other day. And I saw I saw Ex Machina. Robots are taking over. Yeah. Which was really not as sexy and violent and crazy as the trailer made it out to be. The commercials make it look like it stars the robot from the Svetka Vodka ads.

Yes. I haven't gotten to see it, but I want to for that reason. Yeah. That's her name in the movie, Svetka. It is her name in the movie. And she's like, just fucking fuck. So anyway,

and then she leaves him and then she goes on and she kills the like, kills the president and rules over. Did I ruin it for everybody? Fuck! No, and then I saw, just to erase, like, all the good movie, like, watching, like, you know, excellent cinema, I went and saw San Andreas. I was just like, wah! And I just poured popcorn on my head. I'd be more enthusiastic about that movie

if I lived on this coast. I'm sorry, man. I'm more of a fan of Ghostbusters. When I'm out in California, that's not going to happen. That's right. Yeah, sorry, man man Ghostbusters 2 The Statue of Liberty is not walking to California

Well fucking Giamatti said we'd feel it here too So You're going to fucking applaud that Count us in Give us some action We want a piece of it What you want me to reenact it You want me to reenact it Count us in. Give us some action. We want a piece of it.

What? You want me to reenact it? You want me to reenact it? Okay, you ready? Here it is. Here's San Andreas. In five fucking seconds. I'll shake your stool. How does it... Okay, Dr. Hauser. Anybody needs me to check their stool during the podcast,

just let me know. I'm a doctor. It's very secure. It can't happen here. We're in New York. Well, it looks a little... It's a California-made stool, you know, a little more. Remember to read the card on the flowers.

Hey, yell it. That was San Andreas, Reenacted by Oh, I didn't do it yet, man Oh, you're gonna do it? We're moving on Are you really doing it? No, we're moving on What happened?

Tip the hat? Oh, yeah, you're right Oh, yeah, he tipped the hat He goes fucking inside there You're right, this is a podcast I shouldn't be doing physical comedy You people at home Are really missing out He's shaking all over the place I did a whole Michael Jackson thing He goes fucking inside there. You're right, this is a podcast. I shouldn't be doing physical comedy. You people at home are really missing out.

He's shaking all over the place. I did a whole Michael Jackson thing. He just fell off the stage. He won't stop shaking. I've never seen a man become an earthquake before my very eyes before. Incredible. I'm amazed. My chest split open. Dan, do you remember that one Tuesday night when you were performing your Tony-nominated role

in the 25th annual Putnam County Spelling Bee and I was in the audience. Do you remember me since then? 20 people. Were you there? Yeah. I totally remember me. Okay, cool. I was like, eh.

I appreciate it. Smells like weed in here. Now it's a part of, you know, people might be vaping. Who knows? It's probably me. It's probably a cool venue. This is a part of... You know, people might be vaping. Who knows? It's probably me. It's probably a cool venue. This is the part of the show, Dan, where I say, Let the games begin. Bring your name tags out of the shadows.

There is a triple tit vest in the front row. This young woman is so creative every time she knits these things. She fucking knitted that thing, you guys. I don't know why you're not all diving at that one. That's pretty amazing. She made a face hugger that I have, that I own proudly, that she knitted. And it looks just like a face hugger from Alien. I've seen that one before.

I told my friend about it, and they're like, oh, yeah, I heard about that girl. Yeah, she's famous. She's familiar with his work. She's famous with that shit. I know. that one before. I told my friend about it and they're like, oh yeah, I heard about that girl. Yeah, she's famous. She's famous with that shit. I know, I see it. I like Ghost Bilsters back there. That's a good one. That's topical because I just mentioned it. How's Another Infinity going?

I like the guy that's holding up the puffiest picture you could find of Brendan Fraser. Airplane, I've seen that one before. All right, so you guys go pick out, put down your microphones, go pick out, oh, there's a Death Star. Go pick out a name tag that you want to play for anything you want and while you do that we'll do this we'll be right back after these messages hey hey starting your own business they'll say you're crazy to put everything on the line to be your own boss but but not GoDaddy. They like that courageous, passionate kind of crazy,

and they can help you put the idea or business you're crazy passionate about online with their Get Online Today toolkit. You get a memorable domain name, a professional website, and personalized email powered by Microsoft Office 365. GoDaddy makes it super easy for you to start, run, and grow your business online just like they've done for millions of people. Sounds expensive,

doesn't it? It's not. For a limited time, GoDaddy's Get Online Today toolkit is just $1 a month. That's $1 with the purchase of an annual plan. As they say in RoboCop, I'd buy that for a dollar. GoDaddy provides award-winning phone and chat support 24-7. If you have a problem or need help figuring out what products are right for your business, just call. Try the Get Online Today Toolkit from GoDaddy.com and get a domain name, a website, and email for only a dollar a month. Oh yeah, the web hosting and 24-7 live customer support, totally free. Check it out at godaddy.com slash podcast. That's godaddy.com slash podcast. Domain included with annual plan only. See site for details.

Hey, earlier this year, DraftKings crowned the first ever fantasy golf millionaire. And with golf's second major starting next week, DraftKings is at it again with an event that's even bigger and better than before. Two and a half million dollars are up for grabs and another millionaire will be made. DraftKings is America's favorite one-week fantasy golf site where you can win huge prizes every tournament. So whether you're a total golf enthusiast or just looking to try another fantasy sport, DraftKings lets you experience the game in a brand new way by playing to win a million bucks. Just pick six golfers. I'd go with Chi Chi Rodriguez and pile up the points and pick up your cash. That's it.

This is the biggest one week fantasy golf contest ever. The event begins with the tournament. So choose your players before next Thursday's tee off. So you can experience the celebration of a lifetime on Sunday night. And then maybe pop in a copy of Tin Cup with Kevin Costner. Just to tie it back to movies, get to DraftKings.com now and use the promo code MOVIE to play for free for a shot to become a millionaire. Enter MOVIE now at DraftKings.com.

DraftKings.com. That's DraftKings.com. All right, we're back. Dan is the tits tonight. He picked the three-breasted... Take it out. I tripped on the way to the Death Star and I grabbed the titties.

Now I got the titties. I thought that was intentional. No, I totally fell on my face. That's how Darth Vader's sexual harassment suit got explained away. I was on my way to the Death Star and it's a cape. It tripped me. The Force made me do it.

What size is that? And what's your name again? These are very... B's? Is this a B? B cup? I don't know what the fuck. A's?

No way. Those are bigger than A's. I say... Whatever they say, yay. Anything more in the handful as well? A's? No way. Those are bigger than A's. Whatever they say, yay. Anything more in the handful as well? It's a waste, she says. Yeah, said the small boobed lady. I didn't even look, really.

How did you look at the classmanship on these nipples? Yeah, he's really working the nipples there. It's making me uncomfortable in my dick area. Check it out. We just... My daughter... What's happening? No, my daughter's... Wait, this is even going to sound crazy.

She's two and a half. I'm going to speed through that part. And we just got rid of the pacifiers. Oh, congratulations. Yes. Now you're going to come home with that and confuse her. I'm gonna speed through that part and we just got rid of the pacifiers oh congratulations now you're gonna come home with that and confuse her to be like sorry no I'm not gonna wear this maybe I'll give it to my wife and reenact

if she's breastfeeding and she's cold throw that on yeah maybe I'll throw this in the crib or traumatize your child with a five-titted lady. Yeah, your kid's going to grow up fucked up if he sees that thing. And your kid's going to have a real taste for yarn. You're right.

Love a woman in a sweater. Maybe that was a terrible idea. I'll just give it to my wife. My wife! Elliot, who are you playing for? I'm playing for Teenage Mutant Nikki Turtles. It's a nice poster that Nikki made. Which I chose because this is a boring reason.

But my sister-in-law, whose name Nikki, was just in town, and she's getting married pretty soon. Let's hear it. Everybody raise a glass to Nikki Turtles. And her name is Nikki Turtles. Yeah, of course. Yeah, that's what you just said. Very common last name, of course. Very common Jewish last name, Turtles.

Turtlesburg. They changed it. Shorten it to be more Hollywood. They changed it to sound less Jewish and more turtlish. Yeah. They changed it to Ellis Island, probably. Jesse, who are you playing for? I'm playing for Lindsay.

She wrote her name on a Post-it note and put it on a DVD of Indiana Jones bonus material from the box set. Wow, interesting name tag, interesting choice. The two of you, it's like, it's a lady named Lindsay? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, it is. Yeah, definitely a woman. Do you have a, is she cute? You want to ask her out or something? I don't know. It's a lady named Lindsay? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, it is. Yeah, definitely a woman. Is she cute?

You want to ask her out or something? I don't know. I barely met her, Doug. He said no to the second question, not the cute question. Oh, yeah, she was. And Doogie, who are you playing for? Ghost Bilsters. I think his name is Ghost Bilsters.

Yeah. Who are you going to call is Ghost Bilsters. Yeah. Who are you going to call? Ghost Bilsters. So do they bill ghosts for services? No, I think it's... Perform for ghosts? It's like when there's something wrong in your neighborhood. It's like a... Who are you going to call?

Ghost Bilsters. It's like a repo service that goes after deadbeat ghosts. Yes. I'm just a bill buster and I'm sitting on Capitol. Take a donut out, Doogie, of this bag. There's four in the bag. And throw it as far or as hard as you want right now.

Could just lob it to someone. No, he fucking went for it. Jesus. You guys, try to clear the chandelier. And Jesse gets one Here comes Jesse Look at the arm on that kid Wait are we aiming Ten feet

Elliot's very anxious To get involved Oh he's got chocolate Watch your whites Watch your whites Did you swap it Wait are we aiming Are we aiming for people What are we aiming for people?

What? Are we aiming for people? Oh! We've got a return donut! I've got a little chocolate on my back now, probably. Oh, shit. I'm going to go out on the streets of New York and everybody's going to be like,

oh, that poor guy's got turd on his back. He laid down in some turd. See, this one's too destroyed to throw back at the audience, I think. Alright. Okay, Dan, you're the last one. Are we trying to hit people? You're trying to do whatever you

want to do with this donut. You could eat it if you want. I'm gonna hit the fucking disco ball! Oh, wind it up. Here it comes. Oh, no. Wow. It's stuck on the disco ball. That was fucking

sweet. Oh! Oh, we got another return. That was like dodgeball. I'm going to go to Dunkin' Donuts and just buy some donuts and come back and just throw one at them. This one didn't work out for me. It's right over there next to the other side of the poster.

You want to check it out, man? Okay, here we go. Dan gets another throw. Check it out. This is how easy... I don't know why you guys aren't eating them instead of throwing them back. You guys want to know how to chuck ninja stars? Do it like this. You just pile them up in your hand like this. And then you literally, like, chuck it like a Frisbee. It's awesome.

All right, put your mic down. Here we go. Oh! People are dodging that one Nobody wants any part of that thing Don't throw it back please Oh he's eating it Oh my god Somewhere Gallagher is happy

Sweet lord of mercy Wish that didn't happen in front of me It's not for emetophobes I think these are going to be huge happen in front of me. It's not for a metaphobes. I think these are going to be huge. I noticed you guys have some Oreos that you're passing

around up here. somebody gave me Oreos. If anybody wants some. Yeah. And let's throw Oreos at people. Well, I don't want this

to get out of control, but. Those are very much like Ninja stars. Do you want some double stuffed Oreos? No, but just put them down on the edge of the stage. That lady's dying for some. Everybody can just come up and grab some

communion and services for people that do that sort of thing. The body of our Lord. When you start your own religion, this will be communion. Exactly. What? Yeah, just take half the box.

But guys on stage... She really cleaned up. But just remember on stage not to chew into the microphone if you're eating an Oreo. Somebody snapped on me because Jeff Tate... Damn, motherfucker! Jeff Tate ate a donut in the last episode and people snapped on me on Twitter. That was my favorite part. You like that? Nobody eats a donut... Yeah, nobody eats a donut in the last episode and everybody people snapped on me on Twitter. That was my favorite part. You like that?

Nobody eats a donut. Yeah, nobody eats a donut like Jeff. Just so funny, so original, the way he eats a donut. Tori, do it. Really good. Alright, you guys. Does anybody want to wear this? You gotta get over there. Yeah? Can we get someone up to model the three-tit thing? Hey, dude.

I'm coming in for some Oreo. Can we get someone up to work? Tit thing, man. Oh, to model the three tit thing? Hey, dude. This guy? Coming in for some Oreo. I like that about an audience member. Go after what you want in life, you guys. Confident, hungry. You're like, I'm also going to get a nice photograph while I'm up here. Is this his house? That's Mr. TCB right there.

Are we in his kitchen? He just got back from work. Oh, show going on. Oreo's great. Okay, take picture. Up to my bedroom. That's Irving. We're at the Irving Plaza.

All right, yous guys. We're going to start with a little game that I like to call ABCD's Nuts. Yes. Yes. We'll start down here on the experienced end of the panel with Doogie. Then we'll go to Jesse, Elliot, and then Dan. I really feel like it's an order of familiarity with the podcast.

It is. You'll figure out what's going on when it gets to you. Hopefully. If you don't, that'll be funny too. It's all for fun. It's all good. No pressure. Don't worry about it. You've got three tits in your lap already.

You already won. I am so calm. You're already the winner. I'm bringing this to auditions. To interviews. It's my comfort sweater. Alright, Doogie. We're going to spell, since my album came out today and it's called Promotional Tool, that's what we're going to spell. We're going to spell, since my album came out today and it's called Promotional Tool,

that's what we're going to spell. We're going to start with the letter P. And, Doogie, he has to name any movie that begins with the letter P. Sounds easier than it is, I guess. And then if you match the movie that I already wrote down, you win automatically. But if you successfully say a movie that begins with P, we move on to the next player, and so on, and so on. Doogie.

P. Prometheus. Ooh, nice P. I liked that movie more than most people didn't like it. I thought it was good. But some people love it. I liked it. And people are... Oh, moth! Moth! Bug in my ear! Bug in my ear!

People are fucking psyched about The Martian. The new Ridley Scott with Matt Damon as a guy who's stranded in space. Didn't we just see that? I didn't even know about it. Okay. I'll see it again, though. I'll see Matt Damon stranded in space any day of the week. The movie I went with is, of course, Philadelphia

because I'm a promotional tool and I'll be at Helium Comedy Club in Philadelphia on June 24th and 27th. Next letter for Jesse is R. I'm going to go with Rope. Rope is a fun R. It's like Birdman with less drumming.

Yep. Takes place in New York, too. Because it's all long scenes. Yeah, yeah. Very cool. I went with rocket science. Do you know that movie, Rocket Science? Oh, I don't.

Is it like weird science at all? No. It's got the word science in it, but it's a different science. Oh. It's one of the more normal sciences. Oh. Because there is a thing called rocket science. I don't know if anyone's studying weird science or making it their job.

But I guess Mythbusters made it. That movie, Rocket Science, came to mind for me because I just watched it as movie number 102 in the Doug Loves Minis 365 Movies in 365 Days Challenge, which I'm way behind on. The letter for you, Elliot, is O. I'll say. A lot of O's in this one. Octopussy. Think ahead with some O's, you guys. Octopussy. Yeah. Taking it off the table right away. Yeah.

Easily, along with Snatch, probably the two dirtiest titles that are technically clean. You could just say to a kid, you just walk up on a playground and say to a kid, you want to go see Octopussy? Cops can't touch you. Technically, yeah, that's not inappropriate at all.

It was PG. It was an older Bond, so he didn't really fuck much. He did a lot of cuddling. I went with the motion picture Orange County because I'll be at the Irvine Improv on Tuesday, July 7. M, Dan, any movie that begins with M?

Use your microphone voice. Much better. Mississippi Burning? Yes! Good one. You're all invited back on the show. You're all doing great so far. I went with

Meet Me in St. Louis. Oh, I thought you were going to Mississippi. I thought so too. I was just proud of you that you named a movie that fits with them. You were just happy that I actually sent one. was just proud of you that you named a movie you were just happy that I actually said one let me just warn you next time I'll say it's a match

thanks instead of good job or whatever the fuck I just said meet me in St. Louis okay I went with Mississippi no Meet me in St. Louis. Okay, I went with Mississippi. No. Meet me in St. Louis because I'm going to perform there soon.

Date to be determined. I thought we'd work it out in time, but it didn't come together. I know people there. So talk to me, Blit. I'll hook it up. Thank you. Back to you, Doogie,

with the letter O again. A lot of Os. Once Upon a Time in Cap City Comedy Club, where I will be from July 18th to the 21st. Once Upon a Time in the West. What? Once Upon a Time in the West.

Okay, yeah. I didn't recognize yeah. I didn't recognize that title. It's a little-known film. It's really good, very funny. I didn't know there was a film about your upcoming appearance. It's short. Yeah, that part where he has to watch his brother getting hanged. You know, pure comedy gold. Oh, God, so funny.

Yeah, yeah, that was totally PG. The harmonica bit. Yep. I went with Out of the Furnace. Because it takes place in Pennsylvania, in Steel Town. I'll be in Pittsburgh at the improv there July 11 and 12.

I was like, what show are you doing in a furnace? That sounds awful. Well, the club, you know, they have air conditioning issues. No one's going to come. It's going to be July. It's going to be so hot in that furnace.

Comedy furnace went out of business, you guys. Oh, hot room, the comedy furnace. Classic club, though. Nobody wants to go in there. T goes to Jesse. I know you won't be performing in Japan anytime soon, but I'm going to say Throne of Blood.

Throne of Blood? Yeah, Grisalafum. Okay. You could have picked any movie that began with the, but I like Throne of Blood? Yeah, Grosalifam. Okay. You could have picked any movie that began with the, but I like Throne of Blood. I went with Things to Do in Denver When You're Dead, because, of course, I'll be alive in Denver on July 5th at 4.20. And also just announced,

on July 3rd at midnight at the Alamo Drafthouse in Littleton, Colorado, we are going to have a screening and Q&A of my latest film, Chronicon, episode 420, A New Dope. Thank you. God, I'm a promoting fool.

Letter I, Elliot. I'm going to say if, in case you're going to England anytime soon. If, starring a McDowell. Malcolm. Malcolm.

Great film. That's the Malcolm breed of McDowell. Because on Jeopardy, you could just say the last name and it's considered correct, but in that case, he'd make you be more specific because there are more than one famous McDowell.

There's at least three. There's a lot of them, yeah. It's a fucking good name for success. And there might be some Jeopardy! contestant who knows just enough about If to know it exists but isn't sure if Andy McDowell was in it. I went with It Follows. Movie number 79

on my DLM challenge. O again for Dan. What the fuck? No, I had an M before. No, I'm saying... DLM challenge. O again for Dan. What the fuck? No, I had an M before. No, I'm saying... It's been a while. A lot of O's. Over the top.

Yes. Kind of feels like you're not planning ahead based on... We're spelling promotional tool. I went with Old Yeller because I like dogs! Oh, that's a bad movie if you like dogs, though, because...

I don't know if you saw the whole thing. I don't want to ruin it for any... He doesn't get better. They're not... Oh, we need to hitch the wagon and take him on down to the veterinary center. I turn it off before the scene where I assume the dog leaps

at the man with the gun and bites his throat and kills him. Because I feel bad that the dog has to resort to murder to survive. N is the next letter. Nightmare on Elm Street. You make a left. You go down to 27. You get on that. You get off at a left. You go down to 27. You get on that.

You get off at exit 5. Go Bananas Comedy Club. Gonna be there August 5th through the 15th. It's a 10-day show. I really hope and pray that that was worth it to you. That's your last plug of the night. Because it's called A Nightmare on Elm Street. Totally worth it. I regret nothingmare on Elm Street. Totally worth it.

I regret nothing. I'd do it again. No, you won't do it again. Oh, wait, what did I say? Nightmare on Elm Street? Yeah. Oh, I didn't mean to say that. Yeah. This has turned into A Nightmare. This is a nightmare on Irving Plaza.

Yeah, we're on it. And back to you, Jesse. I will say Night Train. It's Polish. Isn't it like a fucking cheap booze or something? Old Polish film. It's a lot like Lady Vanishes. Okay.

You're not going to get a lot of my references. You really explained it to me well with that other old movie reference. Old movie. It's like that other old movie. Okay, still old movies. The only one I know is Old Yeller. I went with New York, New York because they're here in New York right now!

And I'll be back at the Gramercy Theater on August 3rd and you can get your tickets on your way out tonight if you're so inclined to get ahead on that, it's Monday August 3rd, back over at Gramercy Theatre

the next letter is A now that the now that the, uh, now that the old... I know what I would say. I'm torn whether to go with old movies now that the seal has been broken on them, or,

uh, or to go with, I'll go with the new movie. I'm gonna say Anger Management. Yeah, that new movie, Anger Management. Did that come out? Yeah. Is that come out? Yeah. Is that out? That's the frame of reference I'm working on. It did, and I was not happy about it.

I went with A Nightmare on Elm Street. What a weird coinkydink. Jeez. I did not. I'm not performing on Elm Street anytime soon. Performing at Freddy's. Unless you count taking my dick out as performing. I do. anytime soon. Performing at Freddy's. Unless you count taking my dick out as performing. I...

I do. I wrote All the President's Men because I'll be at the DC Improv this Thursday. Which I believe just sold out.

So that plug was not worth it. So let's go back to I'll be... My choice is A Nightmare on Elm Street. See you there. Oh, Dan.

Wait. Is this alphabetical order? What? on Elm Street. See you there. Oh, Dan. Wait, is this alphabetical order? What? No. You think we've been going A, B, C, D, E, F, G? We're spelling the name of my album

in promotional tool. Ah, I got it. B, C, D, E, F, G. O, M, O, T, I, O, M, A, L. And if things go right, you're probably going to get an O. Lost. Also. Lost in translation. Mm-L. And if things go right, you're probably going to get an O. Lost. Also.

Lost in translation. Mm-hmm. I'll be performing in Japan. I went with Life Partners, which was movie number 108 of the Douglas Meeks Challenge, featuring past and future guest Gillian Jacobs. It's a pretty good movie. T. Jesse? Oh, what's the... Oh, Gillian Jacobs. It's a pretty good movie. T. Jesse?

Oh, T? Let's see. I'm going to go with The Philadelphia Story even though you're already playing in Philadelphia in Pennsylvania, but I hope you're going to do another show there soon. I'm doing two shows while I'm there. Thank you very much. And then I went with

They Came Together which I watched as movie number 107. Boy, there's some hilarious fucking gags in that movie. I keep thinking about it. Oh, Elliot.

I'm going to go with Oscar starring Sylvester Stallone. Yes. Yes. It's like they were destined to not win any as soon as they called it that.

I went with On Her Majesty's Secret Service because I'm going to do Douglas Movies in London at the Leicester Square Theatre on August 8th. Yeah. Ticket sales are not going well. Like, why am I going all the way over there? But at least I also have no guests lined up,

so it's really working out. Well, it's really far away. I'll bring the four people who bought tickets up onto the stage. No, people are coming for sure, but, you know, for all the people who write to me on Twitter saying, come to the UK so far, maybe

they're late purchasers. Do what? Go further north. I know, I keep getting that too on Twitter. Why are you going there? Come to Scotland. Come to Ireland. Come to Edinburgh. What letter are we on? Oh, back to Jesse.

Which one? L? Sorry. Sorry, Dan. Go ahead, Dan. Oh. I think you can do this. Yeah. I'm Golden Pine.

Okay. That's a great Jane Fonda impression. Did you like that? I've been working on that. I went with Operation Dumbo Drop. Because I'm going to be near Disney World in Orlando at the improv on September 9th. And wrapping it up.

Last Action Hero, which reflects your own love of Last Action Hero which reflects your own love of movies yeah you might be it's not The Last Action Hero it's just Last Action Hero it's like Raging Bull that way

yeah there's probably a lot of examples it's like ghostbusters also I went with love and mercy Because Doug digs it This has been ABCD's Nuts Alright We're getting back closer to schedule

I feel good about that Were we off schedule? Yeah we were a little bit We're getting back closer to schedule. I feel good about that. Were we off schedule? Yeah, we were a little bit. We spent a lot of time hurling donuts around. Yeah, there was a lot of donut tossing. That was 20 minutes. Yeah, but it's all, you know. I don't know why I even bring up whether we're running on time or not,

but it just comes into my head and I just say it. Let's play Last Man Stanton. Several smarty pants Twitterers today reached out to me and said they have the perfect name for this game. Dan, this is a game where we're going to get the name of an actor or an actress and I'm going to play as well.

And we just take turns naming movies that person an actor or an actress and I'm going to play as well and we just take turns naming movies that person was in. You know what I mean? Like if somebody said Dan Fogler, someone would be like Balls of Fury. Next person would be like Take Me Home Tonight. Next person would be like Fanboys. Next guy would be like Kung Fu Panda. Next person would be like

Kung Fu Panda 2. And the next person would go, I might be running out. But you know what I'm saying? That's how it works. Don't say Dan Fogler. What's that? He would do really well. I think he would nail it.

I think... Do you think there's a chance you would forget one of your own films? Absolutely. Okay. Then we won't use your name. So we're going to get a name from somebody in the audience, and

we got some polite hands raised. But you know what? I'm going to decide based on name tags. Hold your name tags up again if you want me to pick you. Hold up your titty. If you've got it, all you think you have a good Last Man Stanton name. That's pretty amazing.

She tweeted at me, she says, and Pulp Frozen makes no sense to me at all, but let's go with her. Morgan Freeman would have been good if I had picked you, sir. All right, here we go. She wants Will Smith. Will Smith. Will Smith. We've done Will Smith before, right? All right, back in action. Lady next to her, what do you want?

Steven Spielberg. All right, I dare say that, especially with me playing, we can name every Spielberg movie, but maybe not. Are we doing movies they were in or movies they made? We're doing movies Steven Spielberg was in. I'll go first. The Blues Brothers. Ah, damn it! Oh! Game over.

Oh, he's probably in one of the Muppet films. Um, no. Films he directed. Not produced, not wrote, not cameoed in. Just films Steven Spielberg directed, starting with Jesse, and then going to Elliot.

And I'd be interested to see which one Elliot picks. Jesse. I'm so excited I've gotten to film because of Steven Spielberg, so I'm going to go to the beginning and say Sugarland Express. Wow, yeah. And I'm glad you didn't go all the way to the beginning, because if

somebody fucking says duel, they are out. TV movie, Doogie. TV movie. Now, it was released in theaters in Europe. Does that help at all? I don't give a fuck about Europe, except for people that are listening and might come see my show at Leicester Square in London.

No, unfortunately, we keep it domestic on this shit. And what do you say, Elliot? I'm going to say hook. Okay. Nothing makes me angrier. Rupino! Rupino! Rupino! Elliot, did you know that that was going to happen? I had a hunch.

You are the pan. You're the fucking pan. And did you guys watch Hook for Flophouse? No, we haven't. It's usually... Oh, my God. Fucking Dan Fogler's acting out Hook in its entirety. It's real food now because he pretended it hard enough.

This is better than his San Andreas act out. Paint my belly. I wish I had a father. I know, I didn't even do the San Andreas. Fuck you, I didn't go after you guys. It wasn't an insult. I honestly admire your acting. I'm a sensitive soul.

This is good acting too. Though I seem thick-skinned. Alright. Dan, name a Steven Spielberg movie that's not Hook. Jaws. Okay. As long as we're banging him out in a kind of order, I'll just say Close Encounters of the Third Kind

I'm still in the game I'm here Just because I'm probably going to go out on this round doesn't mean I don't still get a shot Jesus Nightmare on Elm Street Jesus.

Nightmare on Elm Street. E.T. E.T. Full title. Didn't he do E.T.? Everyone's yelling full title. The extraterrestrial. Yeah, more. That son of a gun.

Such a skit. The same thing happened when we played Drew Barrymore. A-E-T. The E-T. The extraterrestrial. What else? E-T the extraterrestrial. I'm going to show it to you.

And how I learned to love the bombs. Peter Sellers was great as E.T., you know, the link between the two films. You can barely recognize it. The quickening. Season of the Witch. I love how you were going with E.T. and you still were guessing that you might get thrown out. I'm just so bad. You know what?

I'm going to give it to you because Leonard Maltin himself does not acknowledge that the movie was called E.T. the Extraterrestrial and His Adventures on Earth. It just says E.T. the Extraterrestrial, so you're still in. I've never... Thank you. I've never heard that second part, and his adventures on earth. Has everybody heard that? Yeah, that's why they were yelling full title at you. I've never heard that second part, and his adventures on Earth. Has everybody heard that? Yeah, that's why they were yelling full title at you. Well, but I thought it was because I just said

E.T., not E.T., the extraterrestrial. Well, that's probably true. But I used to always hold out for that and his adventures on Earth because it really was the title. You know, it's like unexpected virtue of ignorance. Who's going to fucking say it? Nobody says it, so it gets forgotten.

And it's in parentheses. Thank you, Devin. Take five minutes outside. Well, because he looked like he might want to go and smoke. He looked like he might not be high enough. It'd be great if the full title was E.T. Yes, we need all the correct pronunciations. But hold on.

Is there a colon? Is there a semicolon? It's Adventures, so were they fucking talking about doing sequels to that movie? What? Oh, his adventures, man. It's not just one adventure. It's his adventures. I think it was Adventure, right?

Did I say it wrong? Maybe. Fuck. I would have liked to see sequels. Jeez, I came close to getting out. Because also, I think Leonard Maltin, I believe, calls Animal House just Animal House. And so does Jeopardy, somebody told me.

All right, whose turn is it? What the fuck's happening? We're on Jesse. 1941. Huh? 1941, yes. Yeah, great movie. 1941. Slim Pickens is really good in it.

Oh, yeah, definitely. Yeah. Is those the boots in the toilet? Who's next? Elliot. War of the Worlds. Yeah. And his adventures on Earth.

Dan. And his adventures on Earth. Dan? Schindler's List and his wild, funky chocolate. Cock Factory. Is that the full title of the... Is that what they were making at the factory that he needed all his workers for? Oh, God!

That's disgusting. I was trying to combine Schindler's List and Milly Wonka, and it just went wrong. Warhorse, Warhorse, Warhorse. You say it three times and he appears. Doogie. I'm so scared. Don't be scared.

I swear. Just go faster. Saving Private Ryan. Yay! What we're trying to do here on this mission in World War II. And I need your help, men. Jesse. Always.

Yep. Oh, that's another great one. Nice pull. Could have maybe saved that one. I don't know if a lot of people would have pulled that one. Elliot? Catch me if you can. You're just sitting

there. It'd be easy to catch you. Okay. Dan? Did he fucking direct Goonies? Nope. You're out. Also, it's The Goonies. Those Goonies.

Just to rub it in further. And their adventures. Quit fucking titty fucking that thing. Weirdo. I was using the microphone, not my penis, for the podcast, people. There's one more game, Dan, so you're not out for good, so don't feel bad. Yay! And I'm going to say The Terminal.

Fuck. I forgot about that one. It's lengthy. Makes you want to die. It really feels like being stuck in an airport terminal. Very good, very bad. You never run into those kids from the other movie. Unaccompanied Minors.

Yes, thank you, Jesse. Takes one to know one. What are the rules? Can I leave while I'm not in the game? Please, please. What are you going to do? Go get another hit of weed? Yes.

I hope he comes back with a pair of crocheted pants with a penis on them. Where did you even order them online? How'd they get here so fast? Amazon Prime, man. I think crocheted penis pants would be a good name for something. Where are we?

Ring Plaza. Artificial intelligence. AI, artificial intelligence. Yeah. We're really getting it together. Did I just say the letters, or did I have to say the whole thing? Yeah, no, you did great. Jesse.

To complete his experimental period... Jesse! Munich. Munich. Can't believe I haven't been doing that all night. Jesse, what's your answer? Munich. Huh? Munich, you night. Jesse, what's your answer? Munich. Huh?

Munich, you know. Munich, yeah. Elliot? Jurassic Park. Never heard of it. Jurassic Park, the lost world. You're out. Why?

Because it's the lost world, Jurassic Park. Motherfucker! Motherfucker! Was that five minutes? Wait, did you guys say I went and, like, went to go jerk off or something? I'm out. I don't mind.

Doogie. I think I can't. I mean, I'm pretty sure. The only thing I can think of is Poltergeist, but that doesn't count because Tobe Hooper, he was just, Stephen was just executive producing it, right? Tobe.

What? You called him Tobe? Yeah, Tobe Hooper. Toby. Well, he tells me he doesn't like it. He said he doesn't like it when people... Okay, Duke. It's Pete Holm and Tobe Hooper.

He said it's short for Toblerone Hooper. When will people remember that? I got nothing. All right, well, it was right there for the taking, the one that I missed, but go ahead, Jesse. Raiders of the Lost Ark. Okay. Oh, my God.

Oh, I thought... I'm going to go fucking slit my wrist now for not knowing that. Elliot. Empire of the Sun. Yes. Came up when we were doing Christian Bale in the last show. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Yeah, it's kind of weird that

all of those haven't come out. I guess that one scares me because I don't think I'd get the title right. I'd be like, The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, Indiana Jones. Don't feel bad for me. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

Yeah. That was really embarrassing. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Mm-hmm. Lincoln? Mm-hmm. Amistad? Yes. Whoa.

Let's see. Now I'm running low. Fight, fight, fight. I'm running low on Spielberg titles. Yeah, right? We're doing pretty good on those. It's a tough one because it is finite. And everyone in the audience has one in their head that hasn't been said yet.

But there's something. Yeah, everybody's got one. Don't yell it out just yet. Devin Decker's got three. Yeah, this is fucking tough. Steven Spielberg. Yeah, that guy. There's one I'm sure I'm forgetting.

What else did he direct? Most successful filmmaker of all time, kind of. That fellow. Lots of big movies we did all the Indiana Joneses all the Joneses are gone that bought me a little bit of time not too much though

can you do that can you think making it harder for me to think of one that I keep talking three seconds oh god there's amazing shit going on back here It's like amazing I can see your brain working

Yeah it's misfiring constantly This is tough but I'm going to have to call you on this and say you're out Yeah no I earned that But Jesse's got another one The color purple Oh very nice You're a machine.

I ought to watch that for a college class. I just read today that they're going to do The Color Purple on Broadway again. Should have been in my brain. What else, audience? Not Super 8. Oh, Super 8. That was J.J. Abrams. Oh, yeah, Tin Tin. I forgot about that one. It did seem like a Steven Spielberg movie. Oh, Super 8. That was J.J. Abrams.

Oh, yeah, Tintin. I forgot about that one. It did seem like a Steven Spielberg movie. Tintin, yeah. What was the full title on Tintin? Tantan, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. What?

Not Peter Jackson. Co-director. Did not direct Tintin, did he? Co-director. Co-director. Boom. Okay, I don't know what that's about. Twilight Zone, the movie,

Kick the Can was his segment. Scott Mangrove. No, that was great. I mean, I think we nailed most of them. Yeah, there might be one that squeaked through, but... Yeah. I can't believe I missed Indiana Jones because I thought, I was like,

oh, maybe he, like, co-directed or was listed as a producer or something with... I just, you know... What? I'mdirected or was listed as a producer or something. What? I'm so sorry, Teddy Lady. But it still counts. Yeah. Wow. I tried.

The Adventures of Tintin and his adventures on Earth. Because that's what it was called, right? The Adventures of Tintin? On Earth. Because that's what it was called, right? The Adventures of Tintin? On Earth. Yeah, Tintin in Space is next up. Let's play the Leonard Maltin game, you guys. Wait, wait, what? The Leonard Maltin game?

Yeah. Alright. Name all the movies that he was in. Alright. The Malton Story. Peter Jackson may have been a producer on it, but it's solely directed by Steven Spielberg. The guy that was yelling Peter Jackson

at me confused the fuck out of me. That's why I had to look it up. No, no, Steven Spielberg directed Peter Jackson. me confused the fuck out of me. That's why I had to look it up. No, no, Steven Spielberg directed Peter Jackson. Yeah. This is a game, Dan, where it's like name that tune, but with movie titles and actors instead of songs and notes. Good luck.

That's about how much patience I have with describing it. Because that's what people say to me. Just say it's like name that tune. I'm like, all right, that's not really going to cover it, but we'll try. So Jesse won that last game. And so then, congratulations. Thank you. Fucking kid knows more Spielberg movies than any other people up here.

Jesse is good. He's good at it. He's good. Thank you, dude. He's a film student. It was an insult here. Jesse is good. He's good at it. He's good. He's a film student. It was an insult. You're too good. Yeah.

Yeah, I am. He accepts that. He accepts that he's too good. Who are you, my family? I wish. I wish I got to spend the holidays with you. You're just being like, I saw this very interesting film recently. A lot of people don't know about it. Fast and Furious 10.

Nobody else has seen it yet, but I was speaking with the director recently about the symbolism of the cars in it. Yeah, their Thanksgiving dinner, they're like, oh, enough about movies. It's an old movie, but it's similar to this. Go on a podcast and talk about it. I think sound really ruined the talkies.

Really limited the camera, but other than that, it really opened up a whole new world. Yes, yes. I agree. So we'll let Jesse here pick a category, and it's first person to two points, and we'll go to Doogie second, and then by the time it gets to you, Dan, you'll probably understand how this works. You might learn about negative names at that time.

But if I try to explain that part to you now, you're just going to be like, what? And you're going to run upstairs and take another hit. That's pretty much it. The categories are, Jesse, Job at the Hut. Job at the Hut. That's movies that have

a pizza delivery person in them. Pizza. Awesome Texas. And that's my favorite movies that take place or were filmed in Texas. And this one, I love this one. At CDLM underscore Pablo,

suggested Randy Quaid. Randy Quaid. And that's movies where Dennis Quaid has sex. That's funny. Which one would you like to play, Jesse? Awesome Texas. You got it, buddy. Would you like an awesome movie from Awesome Texas from 1993 or 2012?

I'm going to go 2012. All right. Three stars from Mr. Leonard Maltin for this movie from 2012. All right. Three stars from Mr. Leonard Maltin for this movie from 2012. He calls it Texas-centric. That doesn't help anybody. We already knew that. He says, hmm,

the movie's based on an article by somebody who also co-wrote the screenplay. That's all I'm going to say. Seven names. I'm going to start with Jesse. How many names do you think you can get it in? Reading from the bottom up, Dan, he's got to guess how many names. I'm going to say four.

He says four names. He lops three names off of the very top of the. I'm going to say four. He says four names. He lops three names off of the very top of the list. We throw to Doogie. Doogie can either challenge, say name that movie, and then Jesse gets to hear those names. If he fails, Dan gets the point. If he succeeds, Jesse gets the point. Or Dan could bid.

Sorry, Dan. After. We'll see. We've got to see what Doogie does first. I'm going to... I guess I'll say three. He says three. All right, Dan.

So you can challenge Doogie or you can bid less names. What is the fucking... What is the question? I challenged that motherfucker. Okay. Are you guys trying to destroy me? Well done. You have figured this out.

You get three names, buddy. Okay. And they are Brandon Smith, Oh, got it. Rick Dial, and Richard Robichaux. Yeah, not very helpful, but some pretty good clues in there. Do you have a guess?

Dallas Buyers Club? No! The Dallas Buyers Club? No, it's not Dallas Buyers Club, but that is a pretty decent guess. The rest of the cast is Brady Coleman, Matthew McConaughey Shirley MacLaine and Jack Black and it's called Bernie Bernie if I had heard

McConaughey I'd be like oh well yeah that would have really been helpful that's what makes the game tricky is that you don't hear the names that you need to hear no no I'm saying if I had heard McConaughey I would have been more certain it was Dallas Buyers Club. Oh, right, because he would be fourth or fifth billed

in Dallas Buyers Club. Behind Jack Black, maybe. What was he billed in that? Oh, he was third, yeah, third. Okay, after Shirley MacLaine. But the three of them are the only real genuine actors in the movie. The rest of the people in the movie play themselves that were involved in the situation with the real

Bernie. It's a terrific movie, right, Jesse? I actually haven't seen that. Oh, okay. How is that possible? I said okay. My brother liked it a lot. I thought that would be the end of it. Was that going to be your case? He hasn't seen that movie!

He hasn't seen it! Everybody's running for the exits. Giamatti was right! Okay. So did that sort of make sense to you, Dan, what just happened? Yeah! Good, good, good, good, good.

Like to buy a vowel, Alec. Yeah, because you now are the only person on the board with one point. I am. I am. Must be my triple titties. It must be my triple titties. It must be my triple titties It must be my triple titties I just saw the triple-titted woman

I want to hear Jesse's Arnold impersonation Last action hero That was pretty good It wasn't bad actually It's out of its time I want to hear Jesse's Arnold impersonation. Last action hero! That was pretty good. It wasn't bad, actually. It's out of its time! We were trying to laugh at you, and you pulled it off. All right.

So... Let's start with... Since they weren't involved in that skirmish, it starts with Jesse, and then goes to Elliot and then to Dan, and Jesse gets to pick again between these three categories. A blog called The Coggin' Toboggan suggested something no one will ever pick, and it's called The Twilight End Zone, and it's Twilight Zone actors from the old TV show who appeared in sports films. I was with half of that category. So, like, if William Shatner was ever in a sports film, that would be a possible one.

But I don't think he ever was. Could be wrong. Maybe he had a cameo in Basketball. Your next option is You're In This, the Blueberry Johnson category, You're In This. And that's movies that someone in this panel is in. Seems to favor, in a certain direction, that category, but also...

Who knows what he knows? What was the first part of the question? You don't have to worry about it until we know which category we're doing. Then I'll remind you. And then the third option, because I don't think I'll pick that one, is from ChrisDaleM3 on Twitter.

Urine this. Urine this. And that's films where there's public urination. With people from this panel, though. Here in this. Which one of those do you like, Jesse? Twilight End Zone. Oh, I thought I said no one would ever pick it.

What a twist. All right, this is all potentially ahead of your time, but would you like a movie from 1979, 1984, or 1986? I'm going to say 1986. Okay. Three stars from Leonard Maltin for this film. He says about it that the lead actor is fine in a showy role. I apologize.

A supporting actor is fine in a showy role. A shorter, shorter, showy role. I apologize. A supporting actor is fine in a showy role. A shorter, shorter, showy role. And he also calls it thoroughly ingratiating. Yeah. But just three stars. And he lists nine names.

How many names can you get in? Jesse Pasternak? I'll say four. Jeez. He does not fuck around, you guys. Knock some names off there. What are you going to do about it, Elliot? I...

I'm the guy who takes a long time to do things. You know what? I'll try it. I'll try it and fail. I'll say three names. He says three names, Dan. I'm playing a risky game. So, Dan, you could challenge him to name it, or you could bid less names.

I challenge him and fucking name it. I love that Dan is embracing the shittiest way to play. But it's the most strategic, and I like that. Fireball, fireball, fireball. Haruken. Leg sweep.

Finish him. Is that what we're doing? What's going on? What's going on? Elliot's gonna get three names And then he's gonna try to name the movie If he fails, you're the winner tonight I forgot he was so close If he succeeds, we move on to another round

What does that say about Taking a little breaky upstairs in between? There's plenty of time. It's just the end of the show. I can make it seven more minutes if you can. I don't know what I meant. I mean, what does it say about, if I get this, what does it say about the magnificent weed? Right? Right.

It says that when you're high, you could stumble into success? Pretty much, yeah. Yeah, because I do think you're going to be our winner. But who knows? Elliot may have discerned something from those clues. I don't know.

Someone was on Twilight Zone, then appeared in this sports film. 1986. Three stars. 1986 as a supporting character who's fine in a showy role. And the movie's

thoroughly ingratiating. And the three names are no help whatsoever. They are David Kneedorf, Brad Long, and Steve Holler. Wait, am I guessing this or is he guessing it?

He's guessing it. Yeah, put your tits down and shut up. Tits down, shut up. I thought I was guessing it. That's why I. Yeah, put your tits down and shut up. Tits down, shut up. I thought I was guessing it. That's why I was like, what happens if... Forget it. Can't believe that's the guy who's about to win.

That's the guy who's about to beat us. People mutter that under their breath around Dan all the time. Can't believe this guy's winning. And I just keep on counting the fucking money, bitch. Hey, do you have a movie that you directed that's coming out? Did I read that on the internet? No, it came out already. It came out?

What's it called? It's called... Hysterically... No, there was Hysterical Psycho, which... Hysterical Psycho. The graphic novel is based on that. And then Don Peyote is another one I did. I got to watch Don Peyote.

That sounds right up my alley. Yes, yes. A lot of cool people in that one. Smoking out of apple pipes and stuff. Elliot, are you going to astound everyone with an answer to this? I will not be doing that. answer to this? I will not be doing that.

But you know that you can guess what's the most likable sports movie from the 80s that you could think of? Oh, Bloodsport. Okay, Bloodsport. That's what I was going to say. No, it's not Bloodsport. Unfortunately, the supporting performer with the showy role,

he got an Oscar nomination because it was Dennis Hopper, and the other two leads were Barbara Hershey and Gene Hackman, and the movie's called Hoosiers! Hoosiers! Hoosiers! Which I just interrupted a couple of days ago. And Dennis Hopper was in the Twilight Zone. That's right, yeah.

Or Gene Hackman was in the Twilight Zone. Probably both of them, right? Yeah, Dennis Hopper was in a Twilight Zone. Probably both of them, right? Yeah, Dennis Hopper was in the one where he was a young Nazi. And the message of the episode was, Nazis are not good. Is that the one where Hitler's alive? Is Hitler alive in that one? Wait, he was a bad Nazi in this thing? He's a young guy who's starting to get into Nazi stuff.

And it takes you a visit from the ghosts of Hitler's past to set him straight. Do you know who plays the ghost, or is it a ghost? Is it like a guy in a sheet? No, they arranged to get Hitler's actual ghost. Oh, okay. It was sweeps week, and it... Big get. Well, that means that Dan Fogler is our winner, everybody.

I'm sorry, guys. It's kind of like when you stumble to the poker table for the first time. And Katie wins the stuff. Have you won the stuff before? All right. Congratulations. All that meeting finally paid off. Total re-Katie.

What else you got going on, Dan, that you'd like to plug here at the end of the show? Oh, shit, man. Well, if you like... If you like fucking graphic novels, I got a book coming out at Comic-Con. If you guys are going to be there, I'll be there. It's called Brooklyn Gladiator, and it's quite awesome. And I got this movie, Barely Lethal, coming out. Or it's out now.

You can watch that. That's with Haley Steinfeld. And what's her name? Jessica Alba. Samuel Jackson. And Samuel Jackson. You got it, man. Never heard of it.

Never heard of it. Where's the shithead on these name tags? Oh, hi. Really? Any relation? No. Okay. Which one does? Any relation? No. Okay. Which one does that go with?

Yeah. Oh, Bill Buster's got one on here. Ghost Billsters. Ghost Billsters. Nice to meet you. Wait, why does he say that? I know, it's a weird name. Where is this guy?

Where's Billster? Is that a shithead? Yeah. Well, it says somebody's name That's you And then it says you're the next contestant On the Price is Right come on down And you wanted me to say that

So you could throw your hands up in the air and go And then not come on down I just told you to come on down. Sit the fuck down. Now come get, there's still some Oreos left. Come get the rest of the Oreos. He should wear this. I think he's too big for it.

Whoa. Whoa. Another return donut. You really held on to that for a while. Like probably debating whether you're going to eat it or not. You want your sign back? Okay. But who do you want for a shithead? You don't call yourself a shithead.

I'm a brother shithead. Sure. What's your brother's name? Brian Manley. Ugh, what a shithead. You're so good at that. You just asked me to call him a shithead. So natural. Yeah.

That's incredible. So this goes with Indiana Jones or this? Yeah. All right. Who's Indiana Jones' shithead? This is the least amount of... Who do you want for a shithead? Macy's.

Macy's? Oh, yeah. Do you work for Gimble's? Do you work for Gimbles? She actually had one right here. Oh, okay. There it is. Wait, you changed your mind? Okay, I'll read this one. But thank you to everybody for making name tags.

And Dan, do you have anything to plug? Oh, you mentioned Comic-Con. You'll be there. New comic. What's the new comic called? Brooklyn Gladiator. All right. Elliot?

I'd like to plug my podcast, The Flophouse. Subscribe to it on iTunes or whatever. And also, the comic I put in the bag, Spider-Man and the X-Men, the trade of that is coming out next month at some point. So sometime in July. Oh, okay. Thank you. Thank you. Jesse,

what do you got going on? Well, Doug, last time you said I should get a Twitter and I did. You can follow me at Jesse Pasternak. I also am a writer for the Indiana Daily Student Weekend section. I review films and stuff. And I'll be returning to the Traverse City Film Festival for the fourth time this year, this summer, where we met.

Yeah, I'll see you out there. I bet you'll be a guest on the show. J-E-S-S-E-P-A-S-T-E-R-N-A-C-K. Yep. That's your Twitter handle. Yeah. And Doogie Horner's Twitter handleA-C-K. Yep. That's your Twitter handle. Yeah. And Doogie Horner's Twitter handle is Doogie Horner.

Yes. At Doogie Horner. And you can check out my books, Everything Explained Through Flowcharts, and 100 Ghosts. Thank you. Thank you to everybody. We did it. That's right. I already mentioned I'll be in Denver.

I don't know why I wrote it down to mention it again, but there it is. I'll be in Denver. And as always, Dale Decker is a shithead. I love it. Decker is a shithead? People who wear backpacks on their front are shitheads. Once again, today's episode is brought to you in part by DraftKings. Hurry to DraftKings.com now and use the promo code MOVIE to play for free.

DraftKings.com!