Doug Loves Movies - David Koechner and Sean Cullen Guest

Episode Date: December 18, 2009

It's a year-end holiday spectacular as Doug talks movies with actor David Koechner ('Anchorman') and comic/actor/author Sean Cullen ('Last Comic Standing').See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds With 50 acid pop-up kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Holy crap, that is a very, very warm, warm Christmassy welcome. I'm so excited to be here in front of this packed house at the UCB Theater, Tuesday night, December something or other. Let's not get bogged down in the details. When the blue dudes in Avatar

are sexually frustrated, do they get beige balls? Hey, everybody. It's the holiday edition of I Love Movies, and like I said, we're coming to you from the UCB Theater in Los Angeles right before the Comedy

Death Ray Christmas Spectacular Ganza show. And it's a very exciting event because everyone that's here tonight paid a little extra scratch than normal to get in here because it's

a benefit to raise money for the LA Food Bank. And they had an auction, Comedy Death Ray, to raise money for the LA Food Bank and they had an auction, Comedy Death Ray to raise money for LA Food Bank and one of the things you could bid on was the opportunity to be a guest on this very podcast

I Love Movies and then also have some influence on who the other guests would be based on availability and the winner is is was Larry Zerner he's in LA you don't have to applaud for him you can applaud for him when he when he comes out on the actual podcast he is an LA entertainment attorney from what I can gather from his Twitter. That'd be weird if somebody on Twitter thought it'd be funny to call themselves an entertainment attorney in Los Angeles

if they weren't one. So I assume he is. And he's willing to pay, and is paying to the L.A. Food Bank, $855. So that is awesome. That is the most charitable thing I've ever forced another person to do. And I feel pretty good about it.

And Scott Aukerman is... He and B.J. Porter run Comedy Death Ray here on Tuesday nights at UCB. And I'd like to bring him out now to accept the... I have to match the amount. I stupidly said I would match up to $1,000 the amount that somebody bid on this thing. So I have written a check.

Scott Aukerman, could you come out here and look at him all dressed up in his winter finery? He's looking good. And I would like to present to you, written out to the L.A. Food Bank, a check from me for $855. Thank you, Doug Benson. This is the tiniest check that you could possibly buy. It's great to see that you're a member of Bank of America.

Don't read out my numbers or anything But it's an honor to give you this tiny check Is anyone taking pictures of us? We're both holding the check on separate hands I really hope that the money from this check feeds people throughout the world Throughout the world? Well, I think you're going to be disappointed It is the LA Food Bank Oh, it's only people in Los Angeles? People throughout the world. Throughout the world. Well, I think you're going to be disappointed.

It is the L.A. Food Bank. Oh, it's only people in Los Angeles? I believe so, yes. Let me write you another check. Because I want to give more. Really? No, but that's... Don't let go of the check, please. Oh, sorry.

We've got to hold onto it ceremoniously and awkwardly for the entire time. For all the pictures that are happening. Those giant checks don't cash, though, is the problem. So I got you a real check. I'm not sure. You just have to go to a giant bank. Let's bring out our guests. These are two hilarious guys. Tonight, the

Comedy Death Ray Spectacular is going to go on for like four hours. If you're ever in the LA area on the last Tuesday before the last Tuesday before Christmas be sure to come by and enjoy this amazing show

that raises money for a really good cause here in Los Angeles. And my guests tonight are... I like to do theme shows lately, as you know, listeners. And the theme tonight is these guys. I don't think they've ever met before, but they are two of the nicest dudes that I have ever met in show business. They've done movies.

They've done musicals. They've done books on tape. They've done it all on at least two continents. Please welcome Sean Cullen and David Koechner to I Love Movies.

Come on out, gentlemen. Oh no, they're already calling each other, they already hate each other. It's already Canada versus the United States. Off mic. Let's bring it on mic, gentlemen. Fuck you. Oh, no.

Fuck me. Fuck all of Canada and you. Well, it wouldn't take long. Oh, wow. Not many of them. Really? No, we killed 100 million of them in the last week for Christmas. There's not many of them. Really? No, we killed a hundred million of them in the last week for Christmas. Who's we?

Who killed them? There's a group. We're chosen by lot. Kind of a lottery ball. And then you go and just murder as long as you want. Oh, there's like a serial killer lottery ball. There's not a lot of food to go around. And it's cold. So there's only so much fuel. It's like the road.

Only more fun. I hope Dexter moves to Canada much fuel. It's like the road, only more fun. I hope Dexter moves to Canada next season. It's hilarious. That would be awesome. Sleigh bells ring, are you listening? Stab. Canadians die and they're glistening.

There's snow on the ground, it's all around. Murder in Canadian wonderland. Canadian wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland.

Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland.

Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland. Wonderland.

Wonderland. Had you guys never really met before tonight? No. I think we had not. I don't think so and it's a pleasure. Are you familiar with each other's work? Yes, I'm very familiar with his work. Did you see Sean play Max Bialystock in the Canadian version of the producers on stage?

Almost no one did. I tried to. I've told this story before. I had a ticket to see you and you had the flu that night and I said I'm not seeing his fucking understudy because I've seen Nathan Lane do this shit and I was ready for Sean Cullen, my friend, to take it

up a notch. That's right. I wasn't ready to drop down several notches. I understand. But I did come to your hotel room and vomit and have diarrhea. That's musical. One in the sink and one in the toilet. I won't say which is which, but... I'm incredibly limber. You like to keep it interesting.

But thank you both for doing the show. Dave, this is your first time on the show. It is my first. Thanks for having me. I have a gift for you. Merry Christmas. He brought me a card apparently that's in an envelope that says my name on it. Beautiful. That somebody else opened previously.

It's like in movies I hate it when the package is they just lift the top off and they don't actually unwrap it like the rest of the world. That's movies that take place in Canada. Yeah, we are really trusting. We send things through the mail.

It's Boxing Day, so it's a box with a lid on it. Yeah, we don't secure our boxes. Okay, so the card says, we couldn't get it together this year for a Christmas card. Please enjoy this picture of our friend Norm. That's the card that you and the wife send out? This is the card that we're sending out this year.

And then you open it up and it's like a surprise that it's Dave and the entire family all on the inside. You did get it together. But barely because you started

with disappointment like people just have to look at Norm who's in his t-shirt and ugly shorts. Yes. And then bam you open it up

and you get the whole family. You get adorable. Norm was not harmed during the making of this card. And then you add another picture of Norm there in the corner, which gets kind of creepy. It gets like a neighborhood watch kind of... My wife was against the second picture of Norm, but I'd lobbied and got it through.

We always have a big fight about the Christmas card. He takes the wholesomeness out of your adorable family, having a weird guy in a baseball cap just hanging out in the corner. It's a photogenic fight. Well, thank you for that. And then you included a $20 bill. Yes. And you signed it, Xmas09, that $20 I got from Keckner.

So now I either have to hang on to it as a keepsake, or if I spend it, then someone down the line is going to know that I got it from you. I think you should tuck that somewhere deep in your wallet. You should have went ahead and framed it if you wanted me to just keep it and not spend it. I want you to have it in your wallet in your wallet this economy it's hard to have money no matter if just because you wrote your name on it on on that dire

day you've got that 20 deep in your wallet you always think oh well it's fine I've got that 20 that Koechner gave me everything that's okay let's all I gotta do is go down to the track and bet it all on a dog named Anchorman. All right? Or say, yes, I'll go ahead and have the Grand Slam. That's another way to go. We'll have one last warm meal. Yes.

In the meadow we can build a snowman. You can pretend that you are Parson Brown. I always loved that. You'll say, are you married? I'll say, no, ma'am. Because Prop 8 didn't, it did pass. And so Doug and I can't get married. Hey, this family is staying in the way. I will not

break up this family just because of our man love. But I will. Our hoodie, our hoodie turtleneck man love. Those hood rag girls! I believe I heard an ugh over there. Yes. You were amazing in

Extract. I'm sorry? The movie Extract. I heard it the first time. Holy shit. That's my Pauline. Everybody has a really annoying person in their life, and you funneled it and channeled it for the movie Extract. Oh, right, yes.

That was an amazing performance. All the nominations are starting to come in. How disappointed are you? Oh, I'm not. I had no... You must have had some hope. No. Well, the movie didn't necessarily do that well,

though I'm a big fan of the picture. It didn't do well. It didn't get press. It didn't get... It's a very funny movie. When does it come out on DVD? I don't know. And do you mind if I pronounce it that way?

I don't... I think that's... I thought that was a proper way of pronouncing it. Yeah, you didn't even flinch. No. The audience was like, ha-ha, but you were like,

that's how people say it. Sea men. DVD. Concrete. Do you think you have deleted scenes on the DVD? Do you think... No, everything was pretty much in.

You were all in there. Yeah, yeah, I was all in. Yeah, you did a terrific job. It was a delightful picture. Mike Judge is something else. He's amazing. Something else. Oh, no, I have 150. He Yeah, you did a terrific job. It was a delightful picture. Mike Judge is something else. He's amazing. Something else. Oh, no, I have 150.

He's one hot tomato. He's something else. Now, Sean, did you see Extract? I did not. All right, let's move on. What have you guys seen lately? Have you been to the cinema at all? I have.

The two of you? I'm trying to remember now what we saw. I'm sure your film was made by a Tom McGuigan. Yes. Whatever it was that you saw in Canada. No. I went to see... You're in one of his movies now, aren't you?

Yes. Which, what's it called? What Lies Beneath. What Lies Beneath. Did you see that? What does lie beneath? Where Kevin Bacon and Colin Firth are... Comedy duo.

Are Martin and Lewis. I love it. Can you think of better casting? Nope. If you thought who, what actors in several continents would be the best choices to play American icons, Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis. And comedians. Kevin Bacon is a fun one.

You would go Kevin Bacon. It should have been the other Bacon. From his hilarious work in Footloose. He turned to me at one point. And that movie where he brings the troops home. He turned to me at one point. And that movie where he brings the troops home. He turned to me at one point during the shooting, and he says, you're a comedian, right? And I said, yes.

And he said, well, so what can I do to make this funnier? Quit? I really couldn't. That wasn't nice. That wasn't very nice. I'm sorry. I said, and I really just stopped talking. Until he turned away. Who do you think he turned to for help when he was playing the invisible man?

You're invisible, right? How can I not be seen by human eyes? That's awesome. So you did say, How can I make this funny And I said And then I left Yeah I couldn't

I really literally Couldn't speak That's a hard lesson Because I was going to say Be funny Kevin Baker Or do comedy Gymnast

Have your stunt double Do some gymnastics As you did in Footloose I was asked one time By an actress How to make it funny And I I said, just talk faster. Oh, good one. Because that will always work, because at least you'll be moving along and will get

to me. Pace equals... Oh. That's nice. That's very... Are you listening? In the lane. Why don't we go on the fucking road?

That'd be great. We could sing songs for kids. And this audience would be very happy. Yeah, they'd love it. Out, damn Spocks. Yes, Mr. Benson. I forgot what time we started, so I don't know what time we have to end.

There's nothing else after us. Nothing coming up. This is very exciting. Nothing coming up. This is it. I went to see The Christmas Carol with Jim Carrey. You went together or because he's in it? No.

Well, I asked him to come because I wanted to know. I wanted to know what voices he did because he did all of the voices. And he did the voice of the usher who showed us to our seats. He did the faces, too. He's all of the faces in the movie. Yes, he did. voice of the usher who showed us to our seats he did the faces too he's all of the faces in the movie or him making his faces it was actually better than i thought it was going to be how what did you think it was going to be uh i thought it was going to be really awful which is usually i took my son i took my son and i take my son he is nine and he liked it but he likes the chipmunks movie, and it drives me insane.

It makes me want to cut my own head off and throw it at an old woman. So you're not looking forward to the squeakle? No. No. I just don't, you know. David Cross was funny in the first one. Was he? Yeah.

Was he? If you're an adult. He was in Curious George, the movie, and he played the younger brother. Yeah, he's the voice of somebody. Oh, my God. And it's just him being bitter, which is really what he does. There's nothing wrong with people earning money. No, it's not.

There's nothing wrong with it, except when you shit on everybody else for doing the same thing. I know. I don't think he does that anymore, does he? Boom! Yeah, I think he can't. Did you read his book? He's got to delete. No.

You're on page six. Oh! Early on. Infamy got a delete. No. You're on page six. Oh! Early on. Infamy. I'll take it. What about... I saw the Mr. Fox movie. That's the last movie.

Is that good? No, so you guys only go see movies when you're taking your kids, right? Yes and no. Although I will say this. Last night I realized I woke up still dreaming of Zombieland, and I was in it. And I was trying to pretend I was a zombie too and we were huddled under a staircase somewhere like in a school waiting for humans

and I was like, fuck, I have got to really zombie this thing or I am going to be eaten. And there's nothing really, I can think, there's a lot of bad deaths, but among them have to be eaten by a bunch of zombies. That person who can't really even digest you. Right. Because they don't digest you.

No, it just comes out of the lump of flesh. They must just take a bite. That's fine. Now you're one of us. Isn't that what's happening? That is an interesting point. How come zombies are never shitting? Or vampires.

Vampires shit pellets, or what do they do? Like owls, owls when they eat something, right? This is not related, but owls when they eat something, they eat a mouse and then they eat the whole thing and then it comes out hard pellets of hair and bone. And I'm like, you must have, what happens with vampires? They shit on your car. I would like to see that.

If they roost above your house and shit on your car, what would that be? Just splashes of black blood coming out of their ass? Nice, yes. Deep, deep black blood. You know, if you had a zombie shitting in your corner, it would probably just be an eye or a finger or something. Because they do just things whole.

Does Mr. Fox ever shit? Yep. Not in the picture that I remember. Does he? I'm sure he does, but he's got a wonderfully manicured tail. He's got a lot of tunnels at their disposal, right? And there's nothing dropping all around. We don't see the picture. Does he? I'm sure he does, but he's got a wonderfully manicured tail. There's a lot of tunnels at their disposal, right? And there's nothing dropping all around. We don't see the toilet, so I don't know. How do you plumb underground?

Well, you just cover it up. Or you build a tunnel, and you go in there and shit, and then collapse it with explosives. Every time? Every time. Like the bridge over the River Kwai. Yeah, that's right. That is correct. All right. Like the bridge over the river Kwai. Yeah, that's right. That is correct.

All right. Did you like the... Was it fantastic? It was fine. It was fine. Because I hear very mixed things about it. People seem to love it, or they're just kind of aggravated by the cheesiness of the animation that it's all...

Oh, I didn't mind the animation. I enjoyed it. Herky-jerky little puppets. Oh, they didn't bother me at all. I enjoyed it. Although, for the kids, I don't think they really, they're not getting the whole story of what's really going on. It's kind of an adult story, really.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's very dirty. I kind of, it's very dirty. It's weird that Mr. Fox is like obsessed about frequent fire miles. That doesn't make sense to me. You might be confusing two pictures. Oh, yes. I'm thinking of Up.

Yes. In the air. In the air. Up in the air. Up in the air. Up in the air. The two of them together. I was thinking today, when all the award nominations are coming out this year, that the makers of Up in the Air or Up, either way, could be often disappointed. Oh, shit. We've got a spill. I love how

lackadaisical you were about the spill. You finished your sentence. You completed your sentence. And then chose to pick up your notes. The podcast comes first. And now the bottle is once again... On a weird angle. Canted in such a way that it's dangerous.

Well, I bought this bottle in Italy. It's the Eiffel Tower bottle of water. Nice! It just leans at an angle. Folks, I don't know. That's quick. That's very quick. It's like we're in Catwoman's...

I'm a professional. Catwoman's lair. I'm doing a professional show. And you not once did he grab for his iPhone. Not once. He doesn't care. Secure the iPhone is completely dry. I know what's going on with my iPhone at all times.

This is supposed to be upstage, but clearly... If my iPhone were a baby, it would live to adulthood. Speaking of cheesy animation, though, I went to see the frog princess, Princess and the Frog. Oh, you didn't like going back to the 2D? Well, you know, I don't mind 2D. I went to see the Frog Princess, Princess and the Frog. Oh, you didn't like going back to the 2D? Well, you know, I don't mind 2D. I enjoy it. But I don't understand 3D. It's not 3D. Anyway, I want to see a 4D movie

that goes into my brain in time and changes my opinions. Why not 5 or 6D? I'd like to. Suddenly we all turn to liquid and gel into a globe and then spin. That would be great. While we're watching the movie from the inside out.

7D, we're actually in the film trying to escape it while it's being shown. 8D is when... All the while, I just want to get cast in it. That's all you're all about. Whereas I try and avoid being cast in anything. That is what I try to do. How are you doing so far? Excellent. 100%. Perfect. I'm just

knocking it out of the park. Batting 1%. You were in Where the Wild Things Are, directed by Ato Magoian. Were you? Yeah, I was. What was it called again? Not Where the Wild Things Are. That's not even close, is it? It's kind of close. There's a W word in it.

Yeah, it's called What Lies Beneath, which is Where the Wild Things Are Beneath. Not even close there. It was called What Lies Beneath? Are you sure? What Lies Beneath? I thought that was the Harrison Ford, Michelle Pfeiffer movie. Is it?

Yeah. Oh. That's a horror film. Jeez, I did the same thing during an interview when I was talking about the movie. Yeah, yeah. What Lies Beneath is... What Lies Beneath is one where she's in the bathtub drowned. Yeah, it's a Mechis director.

What is the other one? Oh, my God. What's Beneath the Surface. Where the Truth Lies. Where the Truth Lies. Love that movie. Boom. It was so good.

Marv. Yeah, I really blew that. Where the Truth Lies. Oh, good movie. Animation is shit in that. I love it when a non-stoned individual is correcting a stoned individual and then I get to turn the tables.

It's like a double win. But both of us are still wrong. Both of us are still wrong. Do you understand? It's Christmas, okay? There are kids out there who are going to be wrong all the time. But do they know it's Christmas time at all? It's Christmas time. There's no need to be afraid.

At Christmas time. Let it love and replenish pain. I need to be free at Christmas time Let it love me banish pain but in our world of plenty we can spread a song of joy I'm telling you why

Let it say you prayer prayer for the other ones. At Christmas time. And so this is Christmas. But when you're having fun. Okay, now you guys. Oh, Doug.

Damn it. I always hope that Sean will sing when he's on the podcast. No. And you often come through. Well, I sang the song for What Lies Bedeath. For that movie. She's in the tub. She's in the tub.

He drowned her in the tub. Harrison Ford, he drowned her in the tub. He drowned her in the tub. Now he's going to drown you in the motherfucking tub. That was classic. Yeah. Can we get a copy of that? The world has a copy of it.

Yeah, if you know how to download podcasts on iTunes, then you can listen to that. Can I get a copy of it? That's what I always say My podcasters say no Holiday movies I love movies So what's the deal? Are there any movies about Boxing Day in Canada?

Yeah, there's Billy the Boxing Day Cat There's amazing sales Amazing sales Yeah, there's Billy the Boxing Day Cat. There's amazing sales. Amazing sales. But Billy has already spent all his money. And so he hangs around the Boxing Day sales hoping, praying that he can get his mother, who's dying of feline leukemia, a box to shit in. I was hoping it was feline AIDS.

Oh, well, you know, they're dirty, aren't they? What would you hope for feline AIDS? I don't know. Darker. It is a little bit darker. But what's your... Do you have a favorite Christmas movie to watch, especially with your child, kids?

All of the early animated... Your three children? Your three beautiful children? Rankin-Bass. There's four in there? Wait, there's four children in there? One, two, three... Oh, I thought one of them was the mailman. No, that's just where the kids came from.

Oh. Lord, I don't understand who is telling us that. Is that the mailman? That's my real voice. Are you chatting like the mailman? What do you watch

with the family? All of the classic. The Grinch and the Heatmiser and all that. I love the Rankin-Bass ones. Yes, the Rankin-Bass is the greatest ones, right?

Yeah. Go ahead and do a number from that. He's Mr. Heatmiser. He's Mr. Sun. He's Mr. Heatmiser. He's Mr. 101. Friends call him Heatmiser. Whatever I touch seems to melt in my clutch.

Hey! He's too much. Bum, bum, bum, bum. Hi, Mr. Cold Miser. All right, that's enough. That's enough. I love those, but I always, you know, the thing is, we have to see what you call that. Don't you think Heat Miser steals a little of the thunder before Cold Miser comes out?

Cold Miser comes first. Cold Miser first? Yeah, he steals it from Heat Miser, because Heat Miser steals a little of the thunder before Coldmeister comes out? Coldmeiser comes first. Coldmeiser's first? Yeah, he steals it from Heatmiser. Because Heatmiser has the same fucking song. Pretty much. And they have a really big time. It's like, hi, mister. Same song as the last guy you saw.

It's amazing, though. But Wallace Shawn, not Wallace Shawn, Dick Shawn is the Heatmiser. It's awesome. Dick Shawn. And they did another one. Yeah, they did a recent one, Miser Brothers Christmas. Yes. It was not good. A retreat. It's awesome. Dick Shawn. They did another one. Yeah, they did a recent one. Miser Brothers Christmas. Yes.

It was not good. A retreat. Part of the charm of those movies is how weirdly antique-y they look. Yeah. You know?

And they're just like puppets and their weird mouth movements and how jerky they are and stuff. It's like me when I'm drunk and angry. But I love those. And me when I'm not. Santa Claus is coming to town

with the voice of Orson Bean as the Santa Claus and what's his name? Fred Astaire is the postman. He's the postman who narrates the tale. It's so good. And Burl Ives. Burl Ives, come on. I love that shit. And Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.

Yeah, yeah. I'm a holly jolly Christmas. You know he was a big deal when they made it, because he's got like four fucking numbers, and he is a character not in the story. You know what I mean? He's like silver and gold, and nobody comes over and goes,

hey, this is about a reindeer, so shut the fuck up. They're like, you're Burl Ives as a snowman. Do whatever you want. The only thing I remember from being a kid was the Norelco sleigh that would go around oh yeah yeah yeah it's the same same style of animation he's too much boom boom boom boom boom boom they go to see Mother Nature at the end who sorts it out all right we got to play the Leonard Maltin game you guys oh

my god time already Leonard Maltin is a film critic I just say quickly you may know my favorite movie I love it's one of life but Christmas Carol I could watch any version of it and I will weep really really that's what I was just thinking recently I was just thinking recently I hope there's before I die I hope there's a thousand more versions of Christmas

Carol the best one though is because Alistair Simm the black and white one well that's what I'm saying. Why make any more? Why not just stick with that one? I've lost myself. I've changed. You like any version of it, apparently.

What about The Muppets? The Muppets is great. What about if they did it in Fraggle Rock? Did you ever see Henry Winkler? What if the Smurfs did it? What if Matthew McConaughey did it I think he did Even better all on the beach

All on the beach That's right Sorry it's time for Leonard Maltin Let's play the Leonard Maltin game I go back and forth Between the two of you Bidding on how many names How many character acting names it takes you to name

the movie in question. And there's always a theme. And the theme in this particular case is... This is going to be Christmas movies. Good! Yeah, yeah, yeah. Chevy Chase. Elton John. You guys are both sort of correct.

Chevy Chase and Elton John. We have to pick people in the audience that you're playing for, and I always like to pick people that are sitting very close to me. So, hello, would you like to participate in this? All right, what's your name? Garrett. All right, and how about you? Would you like to play? Sure, what's your name?

Erica. Erica? All right, Garrett, Sean is playing for you. So good luck with that. And Dave is playing for... Erica. Erica. Garrett.

I apologize. You guys remember their names. Erica with a C. Garrett and Erica. With a C. Garrett and Erica. The girls way. The prizes are just amazing, so don't worry.

Don't put pressure on you guys. The prizes are we sit, so don't worry. The prizes are we sit on your lap and sing parts of Christmas carols. Heat miser. They'll sing some heat miser. What is your favorite Christmas carol? My favorite Christmas carol is probably... Jeez.

I really like The Christmas Waltz by Frank Snatchers, version of that. Or actually White Christmas probably is my favorite song. Is that all right with you? I love it. All right, Sean Cullen. Would you like to play with a movie from 2003? These are Christmas movies.

2003, 1988, or 1985? 1985. Okay, 85. Now this movie, I'll give you some clues. or 1985? 1985. Okay, 85. Now this movie, I'll give you some clues. Leonard Mullen gave it two and a half stars. Out of how many?

Out of 75. Jesus. It's pretty good. It's good. It's pretty good. There are eight character actors, or eight actors I should say, in the movie

from, let's say, the year again, 1985. How many names do you think you can get it in out of eight names? How many do you think you need? Oh, jeez. Let's go three. Three names. That's intense. So now, Dave, you could say name that movie, or you can

bid fewer names. Oh, name the movie. I would say name the movie. I think you're in trouble, unless you're really good with years. I don't know. I didn't realize that I didn't understand the game quite so well. So now I put myself in a position. You know what I'm thinking?

Or imposition. I'm competing for strangers. Aren't we all? Are you with Erica or Garrett? Erica. Okay. I'm with Garricka. Everybody wins. There really are prizes for both. One's not really worth it.

So you take the pressure off right now. That's great. Erica, I'll give you a 20. All right. The first name that's listed here are the eight names of the actors in this movie. I have a question. I don't weigh in until he gets the three.

You just sit back. If he misses it, you get the point. If he gets it, you lose the point. First person to two wins. I'm going to barf. Carrie Kay Heim. I don't even know if I'm pronouncing it right.

Christian Fitzpatrick. Pretty. I don't even know if I'm pronouncing it right. Christian Fitzpatrick. Jesus. Pretty sure I nailed that one. And Jeffrey Kramer. Is it A Christmas Story? No, but that's a good guess. That's a very good guess, because it is a Christmas-themed movie. From around, when was Christmas Story?

It was like early 80s. So this was 85? Let me give you the rest of the names. Somebody yell it out if you know it. from around, when was Christmas Story? It was like early 80s. So this was 85. Let me give you the rest of the names. Somebody yell it out if you know it. Judy Cornwell, Burgess Meredith, David Huddleston, John Lithgow, and the star. Oh, Santa Claus the movie. That's it.

Wow. That's it. Dudley Moore starred in it. Give him the points anyway. Okay, you get the point anyway. He beat the house. I'm sure the person you're playing for is thrilled that you're saying give him the points anyway. Okay, you get the point anyway. He beat the house. I'm sure the person you're playing for is thrilled that you're saying, give him the point anyway.

He got it in seven names. You get the point, Dave. I'm going to bring some comedy to this. Oh, shit. Funny teeth are awesome on a podcast. Hey, folks, you like Red Skelton? Listeners, he's got the funny teeth. I don't know how to describe what he's doing other than it's a lot of moving with the mouth around the funny teeth.

Licking. There's a lot of, it's like when they give peanut butter to a horse in a movie and it talks. It's spectacular. All right, here we go. All right, we go to Sean again to pick the year. Oh, he gets to pick because you got the point. No, I did get the point. Yeah, you got the point.

I might keep that $20 bill. 1988, 2003 2003 or 1972 I'll go 1972 Alright crazy This is a Christmas movie in the sense that it takes place Around Christmas time But it's not

Christmas tree Plays a big part in this movie But it's not Christmas. It's after Christmas. Yeah, that's a great clue. From 1972. Three stars, our friend Leonard Maltin gives it. And there are 12 names.

How many names do you think you can get it in? And I recommend not bidding so low. Yeah, exactly. You start from the crappiest name. Yeah, a good opening bid would be recommend not bidding so low. Yeah, exactly. A good opening bid would be about ten names. Dave, do you think you can do it in less names or do you say name that movie? I'm going to say I can

do it in nine. Well, Goober, I can do it in eight. He says he can do it in eight, horse mouth. I can do it at eight. Eight? He says he can do it at eight, horse mouth. I can do it at seven. All right, well, go ahead. Okay, seven names. Here you go.

Eric Shea was in this movie. He was a young man at the time. I don't know if he stayed in acting as an adult. Arthur O'Connell. Great, great old guy. You don't know either one of those guys. Pamela Sue Martin. Nancy Drew from television.

Leslie Nielsen. The great Leslie Nielsen. Jack Albertson. Fizzy Lifting Drinks. That's five. Shelly Winters. Wow, I've got no idea here. And Stella Stevens.

There's no way you don't know what this is. Sean knows what it is. I got it. Sean's ready to steal. Buzz! Buzz! You say you give up? I give up.

It's the Poseidon Adventure. Poseidon Adventure. Are you fucking kidding me? Takes place after Christmas. It's the Poseidon Adventure. Poseidon Adventure. Are you fucking kidding me? Takes place after Christmas. It's a big Christmas tree. There's a Christmas tree in the ballroom that they used to climb out. I did not hear red buttons. No, he didn't come up yet.

He never got a dinner, but the thing is, Shelley Winters. I can swim. I won a medal in high school. It goes on. It goes on. Roddy McDowell, Carol Lindley, red buttonsons, Ernest Borgnine, Gene, Shop at Lowe's, Hackman. God loves triers. Or is he Home Depot?

God loves triers. How about the remake? How about a... All right, so you have one point each. We got to settle this thing. All right, let's do it. Boom. This time you get to pick the year.

2003 or 1989 or 1988. 89. I almost didn't remember which ones we've done already. All right, we're going 89 on this one 89 89 Alright

89 License and registration Leonard Walton To as many prop bits As you can I'm good But the audience is here Yeah

It'll convince the listeners To come down And check out the show Cause there's just too much that they're missing. We're sold out, folks. Alright, what do we got? Hey, could you go boop for me? What's that? Boop! There you go.

This is three stars is all Len Moulton was He doesn't like anything. It's Christmas classic. He hates Christmas. Yeah, he hates it. He's got a beard. No one with a beard likes Christmas except Santa. Let me just read one line of the review. Sprinkle some believably poignant moments into... I'll stop right there.

Must be three out of five. No, that's out of four. Really? And there are a lot of names. There are... Oh. Eighty-nine. Sixteen names.

Okay. And we start with you, Dave Koechner. All right. Go ahead and bid. I'm listening. Oh, sixteen names. Sixteen names. And we start with you, Dave Koechner. Go ahead and bid. I'm listening. 16 names. He can do it in 10. Sean Collins says 9.

8 names from Dave Koechner. It's from 1989. Sprinkle some believably poignant moments into it. Oh, that's got to be. Sprinkled some believably poignant moments Into It Oh that's got to be Oh well you know what Do it

Go ahead Oh wow how many names I think I said 16 What was it Nine names Nine Miriam Flynn. Now, how do I be funny?

The first name's... Just talk to Kevin Bacon. I'm Paul Land. That's a game I play with my kids. Please just say these words. I'm Paul Land. That's fun at the dinner table. Your kids are going to be awesome.

They've got that. They're going to be so gay. My kids, it's weird. My kids, I Your kids are going to be awesome. They've got that. They're going to be so gay. My kids, it's weird. My kids, I say, I'm Wally Cock. No one knows who that is. All right, here we go. Yes, here we go. This is a Christmas movie or around Christmas?

It's a Christmas movie. All right. I would say there's scenes that take place on Christmas Day, if I'm not mistaken. Haven't seen it in a while. Is there a big boat? No boats. Very good. No boats.

Here we go. Miriam Flynn. Nope. Fucker. Nicholas Guest. Of the great Guest family. Of the Guest acting dynasty. All right.

Okay. Nope. Johnny Galecki. Oh, Jesus Christ. Who I believe now is on the Big Bang Theory. A very young Johnny Galecki is my guess. Yes, a young Johnny Galecki. Good clue, good clue.

Good clue. Some people know it already. Now, do I only get one guess, or can I guess all the way? No, no, I'll say all the names, and then you can guess. Okay. Juliette Lewis. Wow. Oh, people in the audience know.

Don't say yet. You've still got more names. Brian Doyle Murray. William Hickey. Mae Questel. I don't know how to do Julie Louis Dreyfuss voice, but that's

all your names. That's it? Oh, is it Christmas Vacation? Yes, it is. He's too much. He really is too much So our winner is Who was Dave playing for? Erica Oh that worked out good I don't like that dude

You don't like Gerica? I don't like Gerica So Erica you win A Doug Benson's Medical Marijuana Tour t-shirt that are still available at donkeytees.com. You also win,

this is fantastic, an autographed copy of the children's book How do you pronounce this? Hamish X and the Cheese Pirates. Written and signed by Sean Cullen. Sean's an author. Wait a minute. I didn't Holy cow. Sean's an author. There you go. Wait a minute.

Yeah. I didn't know I was competing against an author. You wrote a book for kids, and Wes Anderson's going to turn it into a shitty movie. Mm-hmm. I wonder if you're going to get a part. I haven't seen Fantastic Mr. Fox, by the way. It's good. It's fine. And then you also win a copy of my CD, Doug Benson, Unbalanced Load. This is

unsigned. I couldn't get a hold of the author. Um... And, but then, Doug Benson, Unbalanced Load. This is unsigned. I couldn't get a hold of the author. But then second place is you get to decide who I call a shithead at the end of the show. So who would you like me to call a shithead when I wrap things up tonight? The Boston Celtics. Oh, I like that.

I thought it was between the two of us. No, no, it could be anybody in the world. Even the Boston Celtics. Oh, I like that. I thought it was between the two of us. No, no, it could be anybody in the world, even the Boston Celtics. It could even be a group of people. I wonder where you're from. I like the Boston Celtics. Let's hear it for my guests, Paul Lynn and Wally Cox. Thank you very much for having us.

Cheers. Is there anything you guys want to plug? I know you're both dead, but are you fans of Dave Koechner and Sean Cullen? Watch Hank on ABC. Wait. It's canceled. He's too much.

No. Thank you. Oh my god. How many Eppies did you last? We shot ten, so I'm grateful. I'm very happy. We shot ten, they aired five. And you know what? I think two was enough.

Boo-doo-doo-ba-doo-boop-boop. You are too much. Kelsey's fantastic. He's a wonderful guy. Yeah, now he's going to be on, he's in La Caja Full on Broadway. I'm waiting for the call. Sean, is there anything you'd like to plug?

I don't know if anybody would go to it, but I'm at Stratford Festival in Canada doing a bunch of shows there, the Shakespeare Festival. Then I'm going to, so you can go get my books on the net. There's the Hamish X books and a new series of books

called The Prince of Neither Here Nor There. A series of books? There's five written, five The Prince of Neither Here Nor There A series of books? There's five written, five Where is Neither Here Nor There in relation to Narnia? It's actually good Is it behind another item in the house? A giant squid Who is representative of Jesus

And sucking his big suckers Taking your soul Didn't mean to go that deep How do you can buy my album on iTunes? How does the octopus die? Well, in the end, they stick him with a giant harpoon. What's your album called? My album is called I Am a Human Man.

So accurate. I'll be at the Irvine Improv December 26th and 27th of 09. You can see my special The High Road on G4 at 8 o'clock on December 28th 09. And I'll be at the Comedy Countdown

on New Year's Eve at the Palace of Fine Arts in San Francisco with Greg Barron, Maria Bamford, Todd Berry and lots of other funny people. So look for me there and enjoy the rest of your night, everybody. And as always, the Boston Celtics

is a shithead. Lies of gold and few and proud was makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you. Cause Doug loves movies.