Doug Loves Movies - Gilbert Gottfried, Neil Berkeley, Joe DeRosa and Samm Levine guest

Episode Date: October 9, 2017

Live from the Millennium Biltmore Hotel in Los Angeles, Doug welcomes Gilbert Gottfried, Neil Berkeley, Joe DeRosa and Samm Levine to a special LA Podfest edition of the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds With 50 eyes and 5 more kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. We had one person jump the gun. A referee threw a flag on that one.

Coming to you once again from L.A. Podfest. You guys are doing it. Day three, right? And everybody's having a nice time? Very cool. And I know that there's one more, there's a couple more shows tonight. There's one where you can talk with Graham Elwood

and the other people that started the festival about podcasting. And Todd Glass' show, which I hear has like a full band. So I'm not going to tell you which one to go to, but I am going to tell you that I hope to get you out of here so that you can leave here and get over to that show in time. Is that other place they do shows in far away?

It's right there? Okay. Do you think people are lined up for those shows and just skipping this one altogether? I don't think. I think you're right. I don't think they're doing that. And I'm very appreciative. Let's see here. I said where we're at. We're at the Biltmore Hotel, and it's Sunday, October 8th, 2017. What? Okay. That's weird.

Thank you for welcoming me. Does anyone else feel like they need to welcome me before I proceed? Are you Mrs. Biltmore? Why, when I said we're at the Biltmore? You're like, you're welcome. Thanks for coming to my hotel. Did you bring a name tag? Then you're not welcome.

Let's see those name tags, you guys. I saw that one on the internet today. The Spaceballs themed. I like it. Oh, there's a very big one over there. What does that say on it? Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid? Which one are you? Your name is Sid?

Awesome. I guess. The lighting isn't great for me to see what all these say, but at least we got a lot of them. So thank you for, I know a lot of you travel to be here, so the fact that you managed to pack these things and bring them here and get through TSA, I applaud you, and thank you for doing that.

You can put them down now. And, yeah, I was going to say festival badges don't count, but I think you guys know that. And do they even have badges at this festival? Oh, wristbands. Yeah, so this isn't a wristband thing. This is a name tag thing. Doug plugs.

Doug Loves Movies is back in Hollywood tomorrow night at Meltdown Comics. And then this Thursday, we're going to be in Kansas City, Missouri. All of my dates and deets and links are at DougLovesMovies.com. That's DougLovesMovies.com. Yeah! It's so funny how you did the first part so mellow, then still came in with the hard yeah.

Good job, you guys. Nice work, my train seals. You guys are making, this is a great cult I've put together. Let's check out the prize bag. I brought some stuff, some typical stuff. I got a Douglas Movies t-shirt and a pipe from Peacemaker and a copy of my CD, Promotional Tool,

and a blue card from Getting Doug With High, a tumbler that says Tito's handmade vodka on it Yeah Welcome And a gift card for $10 on iTunes so that you could purchase My most recent album Lexington or premium episodes of Douglas movies. Do whatever you want with it.

Yeah, buy a Juice Newton album. All that's in the prize bag, plus stuff brought by my four guests. We got four seats up here. guests. We got four seats up here. And I set out to have four guests that will, I think, have not appeared anywhere else at the festival this weekend because I love you guys

and you deserve the best shows possible for coming out. Okay, I don't love all of you. Okay, I don't love all of you. Please give a big warm welcome. A warm welcome to Joe DeRosa, Neil Berkley,

Gilbert Gottfried, and Sam the Ma'am Levine, a.k.a AKA Lil' Logan! For the stand-ups on the panel, don't you love it when you're doing a show and they give you one of these things? Like, could it be more complicated? Yeah, those I hate. Yeah, I can't stand those. I don't like the three things at the bottom. I don't care for any of it. This is Gilbert Gottfried, everybody! first time guest on the show and star of a

brand new documentary film called Gilbert yeah you have to watch the movie to see what the title means. It's pretty sneaky. We don't know which Gilbert it's referring to. It's kind of like Hat Full of Rain. You don't know what the title means until you're deep into it.

Gilbert, can you give us one quick joke just to warm everybody up? Okay, let's see. Oh, a guy wakes up in a hospital bed, and the nurse is standing over him, and the nurse says, sir, you were in a bad car accident you won't be able to feel anything from the waist down and the man goes okay can i feel your tits I'm sick of sexual harassment in the workplace, but in a hospital, that seems fine. Seems like a good spot for it.

And also joining us today is the director of the motion picture, Gilbert. It's Neil Berkley, everybody. Thank you. It's a terrific movie, and when can people start watching it? You can all see it. If you're in New York, you can see it on November 3rd at IFC Center in Soho.

And then if you're in L.A., you can see it at the Lemley Fine Art on November 10th. And please go see it in theaters. Yes, do that. It's fun to laugh and cry with other people.

It's more touching than you would imagine based on the joke this man just told. Ha ha ha! You said what you said about it was thrilling for me. You said it was the sweet about it was, like, thrilling for me. You said it was the sweetest and filthiest movie you'd seen all year.

Yeah. And I love that. It checks off both of those boxes. And it's great. And thank you for, you know, using Gilbert as a subject matter. I'm a fan of a couple of your other documentaries. He also directed Harmontown.

And then Beauty is Embarrassing, a movie about Wayne White, the artist. Yeah. It's kind of cool that one person was so excited about that one. That's right. Thank you.

Thank you. It is really good. Also joining us here today is, I like to call him now a regular on the show, even though he's only made an appearance once or twice, but it's my friend, comedian Joe DeRosa. Hello. But it's my friend, comedian Joe DeRosa. Hello. I've been on like four times.

Four times? Yeah. You think? At least, the last one was the third. This is the fourth time. Okay. All right. Well, I mean, you know, don't downplay. Maybe you only made an impression one of the times.

Can I tell a joke too? I guess. All right. I didn't know that's what we were doing, but all right. Well, do you not want me to? Well, now we have to. Okay.

Because I just feel like Gilbert will like this joke. So there's a six-year-old boy. Yeah, you're right. He's already in. There's a six-year-old boy. I don't need anymore. Yeah, you're right. He's already in. There's a six-year-old boy. I don't need any more. Yeah, that's... He's sitting on the edge of the Grand Canyon crying,

and an old man walks up, and he says, hey, kid, why are you crying? And the six-year-old boy says, my mommy and daddy just fell over the cliff and died. And the old man pulls his zipper down and goes, this just ain't your fucking day, is it, kid? Thanks for being here, Joe. And also... And also, for his 57th appearance, it's Sam Levine! Thank you.

Thank you. Is that number real, Doug? This is what a sweetheart Sam is. Today we were somewhere at the airport at some point, and somebody called you Mr. Levine. Yeah. And you just let it go. I did.

Yeah, didn't correct him. No. Yeah. I don't need to ruin his day. With all your Jew nonsense? Exactly. Yeah. Honestly, I'm lucky they just don't call to ruin his day. With all your Jew nonsense? Exactly. Yeah. Honestly, I'm lucky they just don't call me Uten.

You know? Wow, wrong crowd, I guess. Guys, it's okay. Nazis are very popular now. Jews are allowed to crack jokes. It's how we survive. Gilbert, tell another one. Yeah, no, it's fine.

If it's someone I'm going to be dealing with for a long period of time, I'll correct them. Of course you will, yeah. If it's a gate agent who I will never see again for the rest of my life, he can call me anything he'd like. All right, well, I hope somebody takes you up on that. Yep. Attention, gate agents.

Calls you something really mean. We had a lovely time yesterday doing a show in St. Louis that's available now to listen to. I know you guys have been going to podcasts all weekend, so you probably haven't been listening to any, but you can check it out on your

travels home tomorrow. Or you can listen to this one again. Yeah. Yeah, because when you're here, that's exciting to listen to your own laugh, hear yourself welcoming the host to the venue. And it's important to memorize the show. Now, Gilbert has a podcast. What's your podcast called?

Oh, Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast. I'd like to do that show sometime, if that's okay. Oh, I'm sorry, Whit Book. Booked out for the rest of time. Yeah. I mean, I think the world of you, don't get me wrong, but I'm really sorry.

Now, do you have any kind of concept of what's going to happen here on this podcast today? No. No one walked you through it? No one told me anything. Okay, well, we'll try to explain everything as we go along, because there's some elements to it

that you might go, what is happening? And one of those is that all of my guests bring something that they contribute to the prize bag, which is what someone in the audience will win today. Did you bring something?

No one told me. Neil, you didn't tell him? He comes up to me. You're supposed to direct him in life now. As I'm walking on stage, he says, oh, you're supposed to bring something.

I think whoever wins today, I've just come up with a prize. Would you mind giving them a hug? Oh, okay. That would be a great, I think it's a great prize. No photographs of the hug will be allowed. Yes, it's going to be a very private hug. It's going to be overlooking the Grand Canyon. It's going to give you a real scenic hug

and then some bad news. Neil? We did talk briefly, yes, right before the show we talked, but there was the idea that I pitched, if you're okay with it, in front of a crowd. Gilbert, doing the voicemail message. Oh, that's even better. You could do a voicemail message,

like an angry bird or something. Yes. No, that would be new for me. Neil, did you have something for the prize bag? I thought that was my... Oh, the two of you are contributing that? Sorry, I blew it. That's all right.

You can direct the hug. Yeah, all right. Yeah, maybe we should film. You should film it. All right, well, Joe's definitely going to come through because we've discussed this, and he's always very concerned about bringing prizes that everybody likes.

You mean the one or two times I've been here? Yeah. I did bring prizes because you texted me four times and said, don't forget the prize bag. So I guess if you star in a documentary, you don't get fucking pressured to bring shit for the prize bag. Yeah, I don't have Gilbert's phone number. I did.

Am I supposed to tell you what I brought right now? Yeah, you've been on the show 50 times. I just remembered another time I was on one. We did that Will Smith movie at the movie theater. That doesn't count. Where love comes and gives him the letters or whatever it is. Yeah, that was on one. We did that Will Smith movie at the movie theater. That doesn't count. Where love comes and gives them the letters or whatever it is. Yeah, that was not good.

Yeah, it was terrible. This is a thing I'm re-gifting not because I don't want it, but because Matt McCarthy, very funny comedian, gave me these two Godzilla DVDs. One is a Mothra double feature. And one is Godzilla, Mothra double feature. And

one is Godzilla, Mothra, and King I don't know how to say it. Ghidorah? How do you say that one? Nobody knows? I don't know. A giant monster's all-out attack. Okay? So I'm upgrading to the Blu-rays, which is why he gave me these,

and now I give them to one of you. Yes. Sounds like you're something of a Godzilla connoisseur. I'm not. These were the only two I owned, but I'm a completist, and I'm like, I can't stand owning two DVDs. I have to buy the entire Blu-ray set now, all at once,

which is a sickness. I'm sick. I collect Blu-rays and DVDs. The guy who walked around in a Godzilla suit died recently. Tom Petty? Tom would laugh if he were not dead. I'm sure he'd like it. I wish this was a comedy club because there's someone I would have thrown out. I know.

This venue doesn't have any bouncers. Sam, what do you got for the bag? All right. For those of you who somehow have heard yesterday's show, which technically is possible, from my pal Clark Wolf, some more Logan Lucky swag from their promotional tour.

A trucker hat with the Logan Lucky logo. Ooh, try saying that three times fast. Logan Lucky logo, Logan Lucky logo, yep, it can't be done. Can't be done. And then a Logan Lucky lighter that also has a bottle opener portion to it. That's pretty exciting.

And, uh, from, uh, oh, hey, Doug, what's up? From, uh... Nothing. Cool. From the, uh, the, the... Oh, no, it's gonna fall. See, that's why I came over here. I appreciate it. You're a good man. From CISO, from the now sadly defunct...

Thanks, Doug. CISO, the entire first season of Take My Wife. My wife! There it is. Ray Butcher and Cameron Esposito's magnificently funny show. And I know that CISO is no longer alive, but I really hope that that show finds a new venue

because it's super funny. That looks like an empty box. It is not. There are DVDs in there, I assure you. And then because I felt so terrible about when we played Willem Dafoe on Last Man Stanton last week, not one person said Boondock Saints,

so a DVD of Boondock Saints. Good movie. I've never seen that movie so maybe I should hang on to it. Yeah, go for it. Haven't seen these either. I'm keeping all this shit. If I promise, I feel bad.

I had in my head that we were a team and I didn't think anyone gave a shit about my other movies but since you'll like them I can guarantee I'll send them to you. I have posters and DVDs of Beauty's Embarrassing. I would love to give someone that wins whatever, however this works. Yeah. I'll send them to you. I have posters and DVDs of Beauty's Embarrassing. I would love to give someone that wins whatever, however this works.

Yeah. I'll make sure you, I swear you'll get it. It's all good. Don't worry about it, Neil. Just keep making great movies about great people. All right, I have a question for everybody, now that we got all the prizes.

And since Sam knows what the question is, I'll start with him first. Okay. Because did you manage to watch something on the plane? What was the last movie that you saw? The last movie that I saw that I actually did watch on the plane is The Outsiders. That is a strong choice. S.E. Hinton and Francis Ford Coppola.

Yeah, yeah. I had never seen it all the way through, and I thought I should do that. Tom Cruise at his heaviest. Tom Cruise at his heaviest. Very young. Barely in that movie. But yeah. Also barely in it. Rob Lowe.

That is a strange film with very unusual pacing. I love Coppola and it is weird to see a movie like that that feels disjointed at times knowing he'd already made two Godfather movies. So he was a master storyteller.

So clearly the blame lay on me for not understanding what he was doing. It is weird, by the way, that I never thought of that until you just said it, that on The Outsiders, it's like, we're going to pull way back on Cruise and Matt Dillon. Heavy macho. Heavy macho.

I mean, you know, hindsight is 20-20. You know, if he only knew now. But yeah, there's some weird long sequences to that movie that are like, I might have fallen asleep a couple times and woke up and I was like, oh, still in this sequence. But it's an enjoyable film. There's some crazy shit that goes on in that movie that I did

not see coming. So if you haven't seen The Outsiders, check it out. Don't they straight up murder Leif Garrett in it? They sure do. Spoiler alert. It's been a minute since I saw it. It's pretty insane, though, the star power that came out of that movie when they were no one.

No one. Yeah, they were absolute teenagers. Diane Lane? Yes. Pretty much the youngest Diane Lane I can think of. Yeah. Well, I don't know why you'd need to think of her younger than that. It's a strange way to put it.

He goes to Rumblefish. So Diane Lane was sitting overlooking the Grand Canyon. And I forget how this one goes. But that's the last movie I saw, Doug. The Outsiders. Good answer, Sam. Thank you. Joe DeRosa, what was the last movie you saw?

I know this. I can't remember the last movie I literally saw, but the last movie I saw very recently in the theater was Mother. That was the last thing I saw. You mean Mother? Mother. Yeah.

With an exclamation point. With an exclamation point. It was awesome. I thought it was a work of art. I thought it was brilliant. I thought it was very mismarketed, and I blame the team and the filmmakers for that. I don't understand why they allowed it to

be marketed like it was some kind of Rosemary's Baby horror movie. But the movie was awesome. What would they tell people in your mind to get them to sit through that shit? I'll tell you... Because I didn't enjoy it at all. I'll tell you what made me enjoy it.

I watched Jennifer Lawrence's explanation of the metaphor before I went to see it. So then I knew what I was walking into. And then I was like, oh, this is a really cool kind of arthouse movie. And I like that these famous sort of mainstream actors are in it. And it was a cool thing. But you need a little of that explanation. If you don't get that, they're playing it at the goddamn Glendale Pacific. You know, it's that and like Medea's Boo 2

are playing next to each other. It doesn't make any sense. Not to knock Tyler Perry's Boo 2. I'm not, you know, I am actually. The first, I walked out of the first one. But you saw Boo 1? I did. I went to see Boo One.

I ate two and a half gummy fish with weed in them and drank a lot of whiskey and went in and about 25 minutes in, I was like, this is too much for me. I can't handle this right now. There's a real movie called Tyler Perry's Madea Boo? It's called Boo, A Madea's

Halloween. I was hoping it was called Boo 1. Like, I was hoping we just called it out. Well, that's what we call it now. Now that there's a Boo 2 coming out. The sequel's called Boo 2. Well, he's nothing if not creative. But it is, it's a heavy flick, man.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Wait, yeah. Yeah. Wait, which one are we talking about? The first one. I haven't seen the second one yet. But I remember my friend Pat Walsh texted me, because he saw it before I did, and he was equally as high when he saw it,

and he was like, get ready, dude. He goes for, like, these 15-minute scenes, no edits. He's like, it's an odd, really crazy movie. And he does. He'll hang in a scene for about 15 solid minutes. Just full conversation. Now we're talking about Mother. No, this is Boo, too.

Mother actually moves faster and more coherently than Tyler Perry's Boo on Madea Halloween. But what's with Darren Aronofsky and just following a character around through wherever the movie is set? He did that in Black Swan, The Wrestler. Like, he just follows someone around as they wander through spaces.

I know what you mean. It's because Pi, I hate the movie Pi. That was his first movie. And when everybody goes, you're a genius, then they go, you can do this forever. So he just keeps kind of making better versions of Pi, in my opinion. But I saw Pi before when it first came out. I fucking hated it.

Because it was just him following that guy around with the shaved head. He was like, I'm good at math. I was like, who gives a shit? You're going to follow this fucking nerd around for two hours? Yeah, can't we follow Jennifer Lawrence around instead? Yeah. With a weirdly see-through top on the entire time? Not weird at all, just fun.

See, she represented Mother Nature. Yeah, no, now I kind of get it, but still don't care. Ed Harris and Michelle Pfeiffer were Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel. That's why one of their kids killed the other are we talking about Tyler Perry's Medea Boo again yeah Tyler Perry dresses up as Michelle Pfeiffer and comes in

that's how they should market Mother hey bone up on the Bible before you watch this shit he's a big Bible guy didn't Noah yeah he did but he really rewrote some shit in noah he did first of all russell crowe right and rock biters what that movie had rock biters yeah yeah

he had rocks that bit people my parents are super religious and my mom couldn't wait to see noah and she loves russell crowe and i called her one day and i go what'd you do today she goes i finally saw noah with russell crowe and i go oh good did you do today? She goes, I finally saw Noah with Russell Crowe. And I go, oh good, did you like it? She goes, I didn't. I'm a purist. They changed too much of the story. And I was like, Bible thumpers are exactly like comic book nerds.

There is no fucking difference here. There is zero difference. Have they been to the Ark encounter in Kentucky the what alright Sam not now you and I will talk after the show we don't have time for this blow your mind

Neil have you seen any movies lately the last movie I watched was The Bad Batch oh a horror film ish it's about cannibals, dystopian future. I heard it's good. It's good.

Longish at times, but I enjoyed it. All right. Thanks for that brief answer. I'm the only one that saw it. You're really helping me to move this thing along. You didn't see it? I saw it. That is actually, when you said it, I was like, oh wait, that is the last movie I saw.

I fucking hated it. Yeah. I couldn't sit through it. All right, there's no reason to swear. I'm sorry, I don't mean to. There's a Jim Carrey cameo. That bothered you? Have you watched an interview with that guy lately?

He's doing something. He's up to something. He says he doesn't exist, and what he is is just an impression of what we think Jim Carrey is. Did he say it after he bent over and pulled open his ass cheeks? Yes.

We tried to get Jim Carrey for the documentary, and his excuse basically he at least he had an excuse he was on trial for killing his ex-girlfriend the things will do to get out of being in a movie with you? I thought he could have said no. So that explains why he's doing all this existential bullshit. He's like, I couldn't have killed her. I'm not really here. Have you seen any movies lately, Gilbert? Actually, I flew in today and watched two movies on the plane.

One of them is the founder about that guy Ray Kroc, who's the head of McDonald's. Yeah. And he sounds like a total McDonald's. Yeah. And he sounds like a total fucking prick. Yeah, he... Even with a likable actor like Michael Keaton, I was just like, this guy's just

fucking people over. Yeah, because he was like, originally the McDonald's brothers who created this whole thing, and he stole it from them and became a billionaire yeah and oh and the other one this is the movie everyone has been screaming for a remake of and that's going in style yeah we need to see a new set of old guys pulling off a bank heist yeah and every review when you

talk about going in style you know it's Morgan Freeman Alan Arkin and Michael Caine Michael Caine. Michael Caine. And you have to start out every conversation about it with, well, it's a pleasure to see these three pros working up there. That means somehow you can allow it. And no one, if you're going to go see the film, you know, leave now, because I'll reveal the end. Nobody dies in it. In the first one, two of them die. Yeah, because they're very old.

Yeah. And Morgan Freeman has a kidney problem. So that would have killed him. They're setting it up that he's going to die. Yeah, they do. They set it up and he has an attack. And at the end, Alan Arkin gives Morgan Freeman his kidney. And you figure if Alan Arkin at his age gave up a kidney, he'd be dead. It would be bad.

Yeah. That's not a time to donate organs. Yeah. And Morgan Freeman, to get the kidney, they go, well, this guy's going to be dead in a week anyway. Even with a new kidney. Yeah, why didn't he give his kidney to a young person that needed it? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Crazy. give his kidney to a young person that needed it?

Crazy. Sounds like a great flight. Sounds like you had a lot of laughs. Were you annoying everyone around you? Alright, well, that was the just sitting around talking part of the show, and now we're going to play some games. So this is when I say, let the games begin! People brought signs, posters, name tags,

call them whatever you want, but they all tend to be movie puns where they work their own name into the title, which Cassidy, she didn't have to do shit because her name is Sid name into the title, Butch Cassidy. She didn't have to do shit because her name is Sid, so it's right there in Cassidy. And there's lots to choose from. And what I need is for each one of you to pick a name tag that you would like to play on behalf of today on the show. So is there one out there you see, Gilbert, that catches your eye? Sam's going to gonna go grab one you mean of a movie yeah does anybody have a movie that

Gilbert is in as their sign that'd be good yeah does anyone have funky monkey or how to be a player to be a player. There are posters for either of those films. I doubt it. But Joe, go pick one. Neil, go pick one. I already know the one. I want this one. I've had my eye on it for a while.

Alright. And while you guys do that, we're going to go to a brief commercial message. We'll be right back. Today's episode is brought to you in part by our pals at loot crate on a quest for epic gear housewares and collectibles loot crate has an epic range of pop culture items for less than 20 a month you guys already know all about loot crate they've been a long time sponsor of douglow's movies and have been incredibly generous with our listeners. If you haven't already, it's never too late to join in the Loot Crate fun. It's the best

surprise you know is coming. Be the envy of your friends and get your 100% exclusive crates at LootCrate.com slash Doug. Enter my code D-O-U-G to save $3 on any new subscription. October's Loot Crate theme is mythical, featuring unreal items from Marvel, Ghostbusters, Stranger Things, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. You hear the stories, the whispers of creatures and beings beyond imagination. Now peer into the shadows and look into other realms for October's Truly Mythical collection. One lucky subscriber will also win a mega crate of seriously epic proportions. As you know, you have until the 19th at 9pm Pacific to subscribe and receive this month's

crate, and when the cutoff happens, that's it, it's over. So go to LootCrate.com slash Doug and enter my code Doug to save $3 on any new subscription today. Back to the show! We're back and Gilbert has chosen it says I'm Charlene, I'm Marlene sequence from

Spaceballs. Which name is yours? She's Charlene, so that's the name tag. Her name is Mel Brooks. There's some classic stuff in that Spaceballs movie. Why weren't you in Spaceballs? Do you know one time I auditioned for a Mel Brooks movie and I lost the part to Billy Barty?

He was that famous midget. He was little. Yeah, he was a midget. So they decided to go that way with it. Yeah, yeah. We went some, we're going with someone more compact. It's a small set. We built the set too small. Gilbert, you're way too big for this part. All right, so you're playing for Marlene Charlene. And Neil, what do you got there? To Live and Die in L.A. Yeah. That's a play on To Live and Die in L.A., which is another Willem Dafoe movie we didn't mention.

It's a great one. It's my favorite. Yeah. Who are you playing for Joe? excuse me this is an Edge of Tomorrow poster live Diana repeat and I picked this because I hate this god damn movie and I don't understand

why people love it so much so I don't know I've gotten into very long bar arguments about this movie just shit faced yeah I don't know. I just, I feel like I've gotten into very long bar arguments about this movie. Just shit-faced. Yeah, I don't care for it. Is it too repetitive for you? What's the problem? I'm just like, it doesn't make any goddamn sense.

They're like, we need the PR guy to go fight in the... It doesn't make any fucking sense. The movie, it doesn't make any sense. Well, they were setting him up. Why? Because he was the PR guy. But they like the war. The people that set him up like the war.

We'll discuss this after. So why are they mad at... You know what? We'll get a drink after this. I didn't get to the end of it. I cut it off about 15 minutes in. He didn't die quickly enough. Oh, you missed the best part.

That's when it gets brilliant. That's what everybody says. In the last 15. Oh, you didn't die quickly enough. Oh, you missed the best part. That's when it gets brilliant. That's what everybody says. Oh, dude, you didn't watch to the 37th minute? That's when it gets good. Yeah, no, fuck that. All right. Sam?

I went with the Mikey Ducks, which is not a Mighty Ducks poster, but a nearly two-pound bag of Haribo gummy bears. And I have to hand it to Mikey. He clearly knew about my previous one bag a day habit of Haribo gummy bears

that plagued me for about a decade. Do you used to eat a bag of gummy bears every day? Every damn day. Wow. That big? No, no, no. The regular. The regular bag. a decade. Do you used to eat a bag of gummy bears every day? Every damn day. That big? No, no, no. The regular. The regular bag. This is just diabetes if I ate this every day.

Alright. Well, that's who you guys are playing for. The first game we're going to play today is called Characters Welcome. And I'm going to list off the characters in the credits of a motion picture and just guess as often as you like the first person to name this movie

that all of these characters is in wins this game. All right? Starting with, and no audience guesses, please. Man at Street Corner is a character in this film. A street car named Desire. No.

No. There's a character called, just credited as Thug. This movie's got one or more thugs in it. There's a character named Mendoza. Scarface. No. Great guess, though.

Probably is a character named Mendoza and Scarface. Here's another one that's probably in Scarface, but it's also in this movie. Someone named Vinny. My cousin Vinny? No, just Vinny. There's a parking valet. There's a rap singing guard.

Beverly Hills Cop? Two? Correct! The parking valet is played by Chris Rock in that movie. Yes. Yeah. And then there's the other characters I was going to say are Chip Kane, Carla Fry, Maxwell Dent,

Sidney Bernstein, played by Gilbert Gottfried. Thank you. Thank you. And then, of course, the title character, Axel Foley. And the director

of that film, Tony Scott, jumped off a bridge. Are you saying there's a connection between you working with him? See, he should have jumped off the bridge right before

he filmed me. That would have been... But that was an interesting movie because it got more action-y and darker than the first Beverly Hills Cop. And so you ended up being the most funniest scene in the movie, I think, because a lot of it was kind of serious. Oh, yeah. Juergen Prochnow was in that. Oh, yes.

He's funny. And what's her name? Bridget Nielsen. Yeah, do you have to deal with her at all? Not so much back then, but I remember, see, originally, Sliced Alone was supposed to be the Beverly Hills cop. But they kept his girlfriend, Bridget Nielsen,

and then I think there were all these rumors that Eddie was fucking her or the director was fucking her well we can only ask one of them what really happened and he's pretty hard to get pinned

down well some people who were standing on the bridge said, Did you fuck Bridget Nielsen? You know, I'm glad podcasting came along so you could say this sort of stuff and not get fired from anything. Oh, yeah! All right, so Gilbert won that game.

Congratulations, Gilbert, but there's more. That means you get to go first in this next game. It's called Whose Tagline Is It Anyway? I'm going to say a tagline that was on a poster or in some sort of advertising for a movie, and you have to guess what movie that's the tagline for. And Gilbert, I'll ask you first, and then we'll go to Neil, Joe, and Sam, see if anybody can figure out what this is the tagline for.

It goes like this. It's not what is outside, but what is inside that counts. What do you think that's the tagline for? The only thing I could think of, just because it was on TV recently,

and it could work as a pun, but it's probably not, would be hollow man. It's not what is outside, but what is inside that counts. Okay. No. Strangely, no. Yeah, I didn't think so.

Let's give Neil a shot at it. What do you think, Neil? I have inner space. No. Joe? I feel like this is so on the nose, but it would be so right. Inside out. No.

Shit. Sam? I'm going to take a guess here. That's what we would like you to do. No. Is it the movie Aladdin? That is correct. I see what we're doing here.

A theme. I see what you're doing here, Doug. Wait, why is that the tagline for Aladdin? That doesn't make any goddamn sense. Yeah, it's a puzzler. It's because he's not really a prince. He's a pauper. He's also inside the

can. I would guess the tagline would be everybody should have a monkey that steals for them. That's the new Planet of the Apes tagline. Okay, so Sam got that one. Now we'll do another one. We'll start with you again, Gilbert.

What movie has the tagline, Bring Protection? Schindler's Lace. Yeah. No. Neil? Problem child? Oh, I see what you're

doing. No. Joe? Def Jam's how to be a player. Because he has a lot of sex bring protection and Gilbert's in it oh that kind of protection bring a condom to the movie

you think is what they're saying yeah because the guy in the movie might fuck you because he fucks everybody all the time and then Gilbert yells at him you're funny in that movie the bellhop guy oh thank you I think it's a movie that's coming back yells at him. You're funny in that movie. The bellhop guy. Oh, thank you.

I think it's a movie that's coming back. They're going to remake it with Alan Arkin and Michael Caine. Sam? A Million Ways to Die in the West? That is correct. You were Abe Lincoln. Yes.

We got somebody on the panel that knows your movies better than you do, Gilbert. I didn't think it was Dr. Doolittle. Brain protection. Abe Lincoln, a character that you get asked to play a lot, right? Yeah. I was Abe Lincoln on an episode of The View and Abe Lincoln in A Million Ways to Die in the West. Move over, Daniel Day-Lewis. It's time to retire, DDL.

Okay, let's try another one, Gilbert. He's bad, she's worse. I'm going to say that this is Problem Child 2. That is correct. Yes. All right, so we got one more as a tiebreaker between Sam and Gilbert, the two leading experts on Gilbert Gottfried movies.

Oh, boy. Oh, boy. So, Sam, you get to go first. All right. Let's see if you could win this thing right now. Okay. He's on the money, off the record, and over the top. He's on the money, off the record.

I know you're in this movie, and I guess it's The Adventures of Ford Fairlane. That is right. That is right. It's the only thing. Fairlane. That is right. That's an amazing... I love that movie so much. It's so stupid. I love it. Yeah, I didn't mind that movie. I saw it.

That was a rave review. Yes. That's probably oneave review. Yes. Yeah. That's probably one of the better reviews it got. Yeah. Didn't mind it. Can I, my favorite line, my favorite line in that movie, he goes, he goes, I met this girl and she was a total pig. Anyway, I fucked her. It's amazing he had so many slow years after that all right so congratulations gilbert you're killing it uh but sam won sam won that one

actually so this next game and i think it was in that movie where Andrew Dice Clay said, Hey, bitch! What are you, pal? What are you, pal? Homo! Oh, no! Ow! I went to bed with this broad, she did... I said, ow! I'm an adult baby, goo- goo, goo, goo. Goo, goo, goo, goo.

All right, we're going to play one more game. And this one, Sam gets to start us off. And then we'll move down the row. I'm going to sit this one out this time, because it's just in the interest of time. But the game is called Last Man Stanton. And the way this game works is we're gonna get an audience member that I've pre-selected is gonna tell us the name of an actor or actress and then everybody on stage has to take turns naming movies that person was in. If you can't think of

one you're out. But one time you can go to your lifeline. In the case of Gilbert, it's Spaceballs, Marlene Charlene. And Neil, you can go to Brian, and Joe can go to the person whose name tag he picked, and same with Sam. Just one time. And the person I pre-selected to help us out, where is TV Pam? Hi. It's the lady with the shit name tag. But you still got picked anyway. I can eat those.

I can't spray the Pam into my mouth. But her name is Pam pam so it's accurate pam what do you think we should play in the what actor actress should we use today ron howard wow so films he's acted in or directed? Directed? Yeah. You ever worked with him, Gilbert? Or? No. Oh, too bad. No. Because that would help you probably.

Is that a tough one for you, you think, Ron Howard movies? Oh, okay. Apollo 13? Not yet, not yet. No! I'm just saying in general, do you think? Oh!

We have a problem. Oh! We're starting with Sam. All right. Well, I want to save that one for Gilbert, so I'll go with A Beautiful Mind. Yes. Starring the aforementioned Russell Crowe

as a smart person. Joe? The Da Vinci Code. Yes. Ed TV. Wow. Yep. You guys are hitting the classics.

So now you can just say Apollo 13. Apollo 13! Nice. Nice. Sam? Angels and Demons. Sam. Angels and Demons. You bastard. I can't believe it got that far.

Inferno. Inferno. That's all three of those stupid movies. I mean, I'm sure some people liked them a lot. Tom Hanks is good. The Grinch. Neil. The Grinch. What's the fullinch Neil the Grinch what's the full title the Grinch that stole Christmas more what you know how sometimes they'll be a possessive at the beginning of a title like John Carpenter's the thing you could just go with another movie if you

don't know here's a hint it's not called Ron Howard's The Grinch Who Stole Christmas. Just go with a different movie. Now I'm going to blank on it. Wait, do you know who wrote the source material, right? Dr. Seuss is the Grinch That Stole Christmas. That's correct. Okay, all right. But that's not the correct title.

What is it, Sam? Oh, Sam's right. Is is it, Sam? Oh, he's right. Oh, Sam's right. Is it saved Christmas? Oh. The wording is incorrect, so. Oh, I didn't hear the rest of it. After he got Dr. Seuss right, I was happy. How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

That's correct. Yeah. What'd you say? He just said the Grinch who stole Christmas. It's how the. Thanks, Sam. You're welcome. I can't bring anybody new around here.

These are your rules I'm enforcing. I know. I'm with Sam on this one. That was a lot of rope you just gave. Do you guys really think Neil's going to win this thing? No. I don't know. Gilbert, you got another one?

Yet another movie starring Michael Keaton. Night Shift. Yes. Oh, yes. Very good. And Kevin Costner is listed in the credits as frat boy number six yeah

that's how i always think of them uh sam cinderella man yeah that boxing thing that boxing thing with russell crowe again Yeah, that boxing thing. That boxing thing with Russell Crowe, again. Splash. Nobody said anything of his acting roles yet. Saving those. Neil?

Oh, Hard Day's Night, the Beatles thing. Is that name wrong again? These are the answers you're accepting? That's not what that's called. Did I say yes? No, I don't. Yeah, no, that's not what that's called. But do you want to go to your lifeline, Neil?

I'll go to my lifeline, yeah. Yeah, what do you got? In the Heart of the Sea. Oh, yes. In the Heart of the Sea. Yeah, that Moby Dick movie. I don't even know what that is. Yeah, it did not do well. Really? A Moby Dick movie?

Yeah, Chris Hemsworth was... Yeah, I don't know why the millennials passed on that one. Gilbert, you got another one? You can go to Marlene Charlene if you need to there was a movie he starred in that was directed by

I think or produced by Roger Corman it was like something race something it was like something something race something I know what you're talking about yeah

do you want some help from Marlene Charlene oh Willow I'll take that that's the one go with Willow yeah cause they were racing to the Willow yeah

hurry up and get to Willow was the premise Because they were racing to the willow. Hurry up and get to willow was the premise. Sam? Eight days a week. That's the name of the Beatles documentary. I enjoyed that on a plane. I also enjoyed it very much.

Joe? American Graffiti. Yes, there's an acting Ron Howard right there. That's the one I had teed up. It was? Yeah. Damn. So you think you're out, Neil?

I think I'm out, yeah. All right, well, very good. You made a good effort. Gilbert, you got another one? I'm trying to remember that fucking race movie that he did with Roger Corman, and I can't. He acted in one race movie in order to get to direct another race movie. But you don't know the title of either of those. No.

Alright, so you're out. Sam? More American Graffiti. He's in that? 100%. It was just on TV and my god is that movie unwatchable. Alright, Levine, you

want to fuck with me? Not really. Frost Nixon. Oh, that's a good one. Oh! Nice. Sam? Sam? Yet again, back to the Russell Crowe, a good year.

Oh, yeah, that wine thing? Yeah. Did somebody say Cinderella Man already? Yeah, me. Sam said it. Ooh! The untitled Han Solo movie. Try again, Joe.

No! Why does that not count? Because it doesn't even have a title. But he's directing it. It has not come out yet, sir. It is not yet a film. They just wrapped production. Why doesn't that count? It just doesn't.

That should count. You know, you can't just list off things that are in development or, you know. Like, it's coming out in 2018 or some shit. It comes out in, like, next, like, May or something. It comes out in like in next like May or something it comes out. Yeah. I'll have you back then. We'll do this all over again.

God damn it. Just go to your lifeline. All right. Lifeline. Rush. Rush. Rush, the race car movie. Yes.

Yes. Oh, not the documentary about the band. All right. Sam. All right, Mikey, what do you got? Grand Theft Auto. That's the one. That's the one.

That's the one he directed. Yeah. All right, hold on a second. We don't have much time. I know. Let me just go deep for one second here. All right. Untitled Russell Crowe film.

for one second here. All right. Untitled Russell Crowe film. I'm going to go with Def Jam's How to Be a Plumber. Did he by chance direct that? I can't think of anything else. Yes, and afterwards, Ron Howard jumped off a bridge

after he... Unfortunately, he survived. What? Just having some fun with Opie. Richie. Sam? What? You got another one?

Is the movie you're thinking about called Death Race nope I just need one more correct answer you need to rub it in cause also I do not think he directed A Good Year that was a Ridley Scott movie oh shit

so you gotta prove yourself right here and now because I went first I've already said more than anyone else, but I'll see if I can keep digging. Good Christ. Oh, Parenthood. There you go. Thank you.

And the other car race movie that he starred in was called Eat My Dust. Ah, all right called Eat My Dust. Ah, all right. Eat My Dust. Oh, God. Did he direct Always with Tom Cruise? No, that was Spielberg. Oh, okay. Oh, wait, no.

Always was the firefighting movie with Holly Hunter. Wasn't Always Richard Dreyfuss and John Goodman? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's the Tom Cruise movie with Nicole Kidman where he's an Irish... Days of Thunder. Far and Away. Eyes Wide Shut.

BMX Bandits. Yeah, no, Far and Away. Far and Away is another Ron Howard movie. Well, great job. Sam is our winner, everybody. Thank you. Come get your prizes, the person Sam was playing for.

Hey, man. Congratulations. And don't forget to hit these guys up for, oh, shit. That could have really hurt that guy. That's two pounds of gummy bears. Take these. All right, Sam, you got any plugs? Hey, what are you doing tomorrow night, Sam?

Nothing. You want to come back as the defending champion? Sure, Doug. All right. Find me at Twitter and Instagram, at Sam Levine, S-A-M-M-L-E-V-I-N-E. That's all I got for now. Thanks, Mr. Levine S-A-M-M-L-E-V-I-N-E That's all I got for now. Thanks Mr. Levine My pleasure Joe DeRosa

promote yourself. I'd like to plug my two podcasts, the horror movie podcast that Pat Walsh and myself host called We'll See You in Hell on HeadGum and Kurt Braunholer and I host the podcast about adult friendship called Emotional Hangs on Feral Audio.

I want to plug my movie, Gilbert, about Gilbert Gottfried. Comes out November 3rd. IFC Center in New York. Tell all your friends to go. I'm Neil P. Berkley. He's at real Gilbert Gottfried. Please go see it. Yes, and GilbertGottfried.com, and I think

Gilbert Movie is the website. Add Gilbert Movie, yes. And since we've already plugged Gilbert, another Gilbert Godfrey's Amazing Colossal Podcast. And you got one more joke to leave us with? Okay. And you got one more joke to leave us with? Ah, okay. A guy's in bed with a girl. He says, roll over so I can fuck you in the ass.

And the girl says, don't you think you're being a bit presumptuous? And he goes, don't you think presumptuous is a big word for a three-year-old? Sometimes, we'll probably edit that one out. But I'm going to be at the Atlanta Variety Theater in Atlanta next Sunday, October 15th at 420. And thanks again to all of my guests. Let's hear it for them. Sam Levine, Joe DeRosa, Neil Berkley, and Gilbert Gottfried. Hang on a second.

Isn't Matt over there? Like, there's a specific cue. As always, and thank you to the Biltmore Hotel and L.A. Podfest and all of you guys for coming to L.A. Podfest. And as always, dropping your keys down an elevator shaft is a shithead. Hollywood creepers are a shithead. They list a bunch of names I'm not going to get into. But I think they are all creeps.

And this maybe being the last Podfest is a sad, sad shithead. Hit it. Hit it. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing crowd was big, tip-tockie, there's no room in his heart for you because Doug loves movies. Once again, thanks to our pals at Loot Crate for sponsoring today's show.

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