Doug Loves Movies - Graham Elwood, Geoff Tate, and Jared Thompson Guest

Episode Date: September 28, 2011

Live from the Comedy Attic in Bloomington, Indiana, Doug welcomes comedians Graham Elwood and Geoff Tate and club owner Jared Thompson to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds With 50 as if not more kernels in his teeth There's still not more that he won't see But Doug loves movies Hey everybody My name is Doug and I love movies! This is Doug Loves Movies coming to you from the Comedy Attic in Bloomington, Indiana on September 26th to Ocean's Eleven! I of course call it Bloomees. Where are your name tags at, Bloomees?

Let me see them. There's Chris and Josh. Oh my god, everyone has one. El Boogie, of course. Great El Boogie. Daniel, Jordan, Josh. Agard? Are you fucking kidding me? There's a hockey mask over there with a name on it.

What's that supposed to be? Charity is your name? And who's that dude? Carl Sagan. Carl Sagan, of course. Charity and Carl Sagan. All the names tied together. There's Kofax.

Does everybody else say it right? Yeah. All right. And L. What's that about? It's like a cookie thing with a marijuana. And L. And what's that about? You got like a, it's like a cookie thing? Yeah. With a marijuana leaf?

Yeah. And where's your name? On the bottom. What's it say? Greg. Oh, okay. I think you worked for it, Greg. Captain Crunchbox, what's going on there?

Is it full? It's Randy Crunch. Randy Crunch, but does it have any in it? It's true. All right, I'll take that. Brett has a picture of what Brett would look like if she looked like my caricature in the I Love Movies logo. That's pretty cool. There's a Fight Club thing over there. Kira.

AIDS. What? Oh, Ross. Cameroon and I Heart Bad movies. Did I pronounce that right? Cameroon? That's right. Wow, there's a lot of weird names here tonight. Congratulations on your weird names, Bloomington. And good luck winning tonight. Somebody's going to win this amazing prize package that I have here sitting next to me that I will describe in a moment.

But first, a little housekeeping. First of all, the number one movie in the country right now is something called Lion King 3D. To which I say, as I always do, fuck you, 3D. Last night in, where was I last night? Indianapolis at Crackers, some guy tried to give me 2D glasses as a present,

and I was like, dude, it's the glasses part that I don't like. If I'm wearing the glasses in a 3D movie, I don't want to wear glasses to eliminate the 3D. I want to wear no glasses and not have a headache and still have things come out at me. And then the number two movie, I'm starting a new segment on the show called

Watch This, Not That for people that only have time to watch one movie that's out at any given time and at the top of the charts. So the number two movie is Moneyball. Brad Pritt. I'm not good with names. Bad Pritt is great in it.

Jonah Hill is great in it. And the screenplay is great. Great, great, great. Seymour Hoffman, great. So all I'm saying is watch Moneyball, not Lion King 3D. This has been watch this, not that. For anyone that was concerned out there in the world, the shitheads in the lost Toronto episode of Doug Loves Movies,

I feel like I owe them at least that. The shitheads were Russell Oliver and Netflix Canada. Got a big round of applause in Toronto, but in Bloomington, not so much. And let me tell you what we're playing for today in the Leonard Maltin game, you guys. I'm going to take everything out of this bag and show it to you. We've got a sweatshirt that says, it's a hoodie actually, that says Comedy Attic on it. It's a nice item that I hope to get one before I leave here tonight, because I love hoodies. Oh, and there's a red shirt that says

Comedy Attic if you feel like standing on a street corner and stopping traffic. You can wear that red shirt, of course. We've got a palm strike shirt that we're going to give away. One of my guests brought some DVDs and Blu-rays

of grown-ups and funny people. Those are appropriate for comedy. And also Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus. And he also brought too many to get into right now, but lots of CDs by

very funny comedians. And we'll look at those a little later. And then we also have two tickets. It's written here on a receipt. Two free tickets to see Bobcat Goldthwait next weekend here at Comedy Attic. On October

7th or 8th. But, you know, if you don't win tonight, please call for reservations, whatever the area code is here in Bloomington. Should have included that i mean i don't know who's going to call from out of state or whatever but bobcat's very cool 336 laugh yeah 336 laff not laugh goddamn and then this is crazy i brought of course a regular-sized wood monkey to shoot into the crowd so i'll do that

right now did it hit a baby again no baby this time all right cool this entire bag is brought to you by uh bob and tom provided the plastic bag and then also and then also a couple of, we did Bob and Tom today so we got copies of a couple of their CDs. One's called Crushed Nuts and the other one's called Donnie Baker Parkway State Law

Interstate 69. I don't know what part of that is supposed to be the title but there's a lot of words on the cover there. and then look at this you guys this is insane uh i ran out of small wood monkeys had one crazy large wood monkey left over so somebody tonight is gonna win this gigantic wood monkey and so all of that stuff is gonna belong to someone and having heard what the prizes were is kind of a clue about who the guests are tonight, but not a total clue.

So I'm going to tell you right now by bringing them out here. Please welcome Jared Thompson, Jeff Tate, and Graham Elwood. All right. So let's start with Jared. You own this club. And you book people like me and Graham and Jeff, and you also love movies as much or more than I. That's true. So when we decided to do a podcast here in your club, I was just like, you know, fucking

let's have Jared on the show. Well, thank you. I'm not nervous at all. No. Look, they love you. They know you run a great club, and you bring a lot of great people in. I can see just from looking around the walls, people like Judah Freelander and Morgan Murphy and lots of other funny folks. And I have to point out Jared's shirt that he's wearing because it's very charming.

I have to point out Jared's shirt that he's wearing because it's very charming. It says Galifianakis, Ham, Lithgow, Malton, Thompson? Yeah, I know. I want to get Emma Thompson on the show really bad. Oh, that would be a great guest. That would be so awesome.

That's for Jared Thompson, actually. So thanks for making a special shirt. That's a first on the show. The person who made the shirt, Crystal Sullivan Is in here right now actually Good job Crystal She put five names on a shirt, well done They're all spelled correctly, I love it

Congratulations, someone knows how to go to a mall That's really sweet Went down to the shirt store and had it done. Jeff. Jeff Tate. How's it going? On Twitter, what's your name on Twitter? It's like a number at the end? Yeah, it's JeffTate96.

Okay, so G-E-O-F-F Correct. T-A-T-E 96. 96. On Twitter. Very funny dude. I've had the privilege of you know being around you sitting in a hotel room

smoking weed with you I think that was in Philadelphia and have you ever I didn't look you up on IMDB but have you ever been in a movie

I am in a movie that comes out next year. Nice! What's it called? I don't know. I was a bartender. In the movie? Yeah. No, at the wrap party.

He bartends at the wrap party. It was a sweet gig. It was both. Yeah. Do you like serve one of the main characters in the film or something? Yes. Who played that part?

A guy named Joe. No one's going to see it. Oh, I see what you're saying. When you're saying you're in a movie, you mean the cameras were filming you. While you pretended to be a bartender. Is this like a security cam as you walk through a bank? I was actually bartending, and we were just pretending it was a movie,

so it wasn't as terrible. This looks like the gayest bar I've ever... Let's pretend we're making a movie. I'm the bartender. Well, we have a copy of your Part of the package is your CD Use Your Delusion Yeah So it's all about a guy

One or two Yeah And it's all about a guy who thinks he's in movies Yeah Use Your Delusion Oh I played a bartender That night that I was working as a bartender. It's a real movie.

It's called A Strange Brand of Happy. I just remembered. Or A Strange Kind of Happy. Or A Strange Kind of Happy. Yeah, something like that. It's a romantic comedy, I guess. Or Happiness is Strange. Or I Want Some Happy Strange.

I think it's about a guy trying to meet a girl because whenever they were in the bar, they were real sad about trying to meet that girl. And that was the parts I was in. I was like, girls, man. That was one of my lines. Did you have a script? Did you just show up and just, hey, yeah, girls,

here's a scotch. Somebody wrote that and then registered the line girls, man. you have a script or did you just show up and just hey yeah girls here's a scotch like somebody somebody wrote that and then registered the line girls man right that's the name of the next cameron crowe's album too and that's what you do when you write a movie you register it line by line yeah so that the line lines thieves don't get at it because that's a good line, man. That's like fucking Cameron Crowe level of dialogue. Yeah. Oh, man, girls. You did it wrong.

You did it wrong. How does it go? Girls, man. Wow. You're the only one that can say that correctly. I tried to put my own spin on it. I don't know what I was doing. It's not that kind of movie.

It's not one of those improv movies. You brought a bunch of CDs from, like, friends of yours? Yeah, yeah. And you listened to them, and now you want to pay them forward? Yeah, yeah. All right, so we got Chad Daniels. He's very funny. Yeah.

Chad Daniels is great. Bob Biggerstaff's CD. He's a guy. Chris Bliss is a great CD, because he's a juggler. That's always fun to listen to. That's actually a DVD of the juggling, right? Oh, okay. Okay, good, good.

It was in my car. I'm glad it's a DVD. Aren't you glad? All right. And then Isaac Witte's new CD, or I assume it's his new one. And yeah, so did I get them all? That's it. Yeah, yeah, that's it, I think.

So holy crap, that's a lot of great prizes someone's going to win. Now, Jeff, before I move on to talk to my buddy Graham, how do you feel, what's your confidence level at for the Leonard Maltin game tonight? Because you've never been on the show before. Out of how many? To ten? Like a seven? I didn't need a specific number.

It's just a couple of guys talking on a stage in front of some people. Well, it's lower now. What in a well it's lower now comedy what's that it's lower now oh okay but you know you you're aware of how to play the game yeah i know how to play you're gonna commit yourself admirably i can feel it right and jared is just nuts for the game we had him last time i was in town you came up on stage and played against uh some of the who'd you play against audience? Audience members or something? No, it was against your feature, David. Oh, David Huntsberger was here. And I beat him. Of course you did.

That's right. He's all looks and no brains. And then, oh, Daniel Kino's CD is also in there. Which is recorded here. Recorded here at the Comedy Attic! CD is also in here. Which is recorded here.

Recorded here at the Comedy Attic! Alright, so that's what we're playing for later in the show. I feel like it's going to be a really tough competition. And Graham Hillwood is here, everybody. Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello, Bloomington! Hello!

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Wow. Is that a fan or somebody's... Boo. Oh, grandma. Oh, I forgot to add. I forgot to give it to you, but I will throw in a copy of my CD,

Grandma with the Comedians Got a Boo Boo, into the prize pack. Oh, you're going to put, Comedians Got a Boo Boo? That's not how I talk. Boo boo. All right, dude. Who was at the show last night in Indianapolis?

Awesome. Thanks for coming back. Yeah, that was crazy. There was a blind dude up front that it took about a good chunk of my set before I realized he was blind. And then when Graham came back up to play the Leonard Mullen game, he still didn't know the guy was blind.

And when I pointed out to him, he was like, oh, good for him. Because I think, I can't remember, but I'm sure during my set I was like, look at me!

Or something like, I yelled at him. Oh, I'm sure you said so many inappropriate things. I know I did. I'm not fucking looking at the comic. Let's go, dick. I did I did. I'm not fucking looking at the comic. Let's go, dick.

I did not say those words. I just looked at him and went, girls, man. That's a callback. That is what we call a callback, Bloomington.

Buckle up. That's my line. How do you get all the... God damn it. The club is kind of like if you've never been to the comedy attic of Bloomington It's upstairs Hence the attic name

Seriously you guys I've been to clubs called the underground That were not underground But it's in like an L shape And that last thing that Graham did This side of the room The one side of the L went crazy And the other side of the L just sat calmly.

It's hard to get the whole L at once. It really is. It's tough. You have to go for the whole L sometimes. It's tough. And hopefully we'll get it at some point this evening. Graham has a movie that is available for download called Laughganistan. Yeah, it's about the...

Oh, thank you so much. You guys are awesome. It is a movie about the first time I ever did a USO tour in Afghanistan. It's available as a pay-what-you-think-is-fair download at comedyfilmnerds.com, or you can go to laughganistan.com where there's a trailer if you want to check it out.

So there's my water bottle that just fell. Girls, man! So it just... That doesn't really fit. That's my whole act. Nothing fits. I should have... Jared asked me if we wanted any tables on the stage. I was like, no, we're good. We don't need any tables.

And now I'm like weirdly holding my water bottle... Water bottle under my arm. Or no, here, I'm going to put it in my marsupial pouch. All the nice, warm stomach water. I'm going to put it on these people, these nice people in the front row, and I just hope they don't roofie me. Yeah, because they look like they really want to go home

and have sex with a strange man. Who wouldn't? Or that'd be a fun way to do planking is just roofie someone and then put them somewhere weird and everyone would think they were planking.

This is not the best time for me to ask, but I have not known what that was the whole time people have talked about it. For like a year, I don't know, what is planking? It's just picking a weird spot and just laying stiff like a board for as long as you can until somebody...

You mean drinking? No. Jeff Tate, everybody. Check him out. Jeff Tate everybody check him out Jeff Tate so you did know I still don't know what planking is but it was funny

I just told you what it is how hard is that to understand you just lay there weirdly and you get in shape or something

there was a super yeah it's a workout you have to do it's a workout. You have to do it near a TV so you can watch the video. So you can watch a DVD on the planking workout. Lay still. Don't look at me. Lay still.

Don't look at me. That's your personal trainer. Drink the roofie. Drink the roofie. That's your personal trainer. Just creep through it. Yeah, your abs tight? Make them tighter. That's all about the. Drink the roofie. Drink the roofie. That's your personal trainer who just creeps you out. Yeah, your abs tight? Make them tighter. Yeah.

That's all about the tone of your voice. You could say it differently and it sounds more professional. Yeah, tighten your abs. Tighten your abs. Make them tighter. Make them tighter.

Hold it in. Yeah, hold it in. You're going to get thin. How about Statler and Waldorf over here? Jared Thompson, everybody. Jared Thompson, everybody. Yeah. Are you looking forward,

Jared, like I am, to the new Muppet motion picture? Of course. Absolutely. I mean, just what he did in the few scenes in Sarah Marshall with puppets, I can't even imagine

what it's going to be like. Oh, you mean that scene where his dick was hanging out? The trailer looks great. His dick's in the trailer again. It was a memorable scene. He won't do a movie without

showing his junk, so it's a whole new Muppets. Oh, the rainbow connection. And what's on the other side with his dick out. I just saw Baby Adams wears the Amelia Earhart pants again.

That's what I'm hoping for. What? Have you been to the movies lately, Jared Thompson, owner-operator of the Comedy Attic? I did. Actually, Yesterday I saw Moneyball, which I really liked a lot.

And last weekend before that, I saw Drive, which was four and a half stars. Fantastic movie. And I'll say this, four and a half stars? Out of five, or three and a half out of four. But I would say... Sliding scale, I like it. But the one thing...

I assume you've seen it, right? I did see the drive, and I enjoyed the view, but it took too long to get to the destination. Well, for me, the first time, for you, the next time that you see Albert Brooks in person,

are you going to be scared of him? Albert Brooks is great in it. I give you that. When he cuts that guy's wrist and goes, it's okay. It'll be fast. It'll be fast. Spoilers, guys. Jesus. It's not like that happens in the opening credits.

That would be great opening credits, by the way. Yeah, yeah. They should start there. That would be a good place to start the story. Ryan Gosling's dick is excellent in the movie as well. Do you see his cock? No. I was like, holy shit. I was more bored than I thought.

I dozed off and missed the cock shot. It's because you don't like wearing the glasses. I was like, if he's going to whip his whip his dick out i gotta wear the 2d glasses well you said earlier someone gave you 2d glasses so they gave you glasses is what you're saying they gave me no they gave there's a special like what are we talking about i didn't keep them i wish i could show them to you right now but maybe maybe he's here tonight and he brought them back. Oh, no, I have them. Oh, you do have them?

Yeah, I have them in my bag. They're like 3D glasses, the same kind of cheap plastic glasses in a little plastic bag, hermetically sealed for your protection. But they make it look like a regular movie while you're watching a 3D movie, is what they're supposed to do.

But still, you've got to wear the glasses, so what's the point of that? I'd rather wear the 3D glasses and at least occasionally something flies out at me. So you pay the extra 3D ticket price and then still get to wear shitty glasses and don't even get the 3D? Yeah.

Awesome. That's what that guy was offering me last night. And I passed. He could have just said, do you want to smoke with me? That would have been a better way to be my friend. But back to Moneyball.

Those are like the O'Douls of fucking movie glasses. Those goddamn things. The O'Douls of 3D glasses. None of the benefits with all of the hassle. It's fucking great. Yeah, it's not good.

But do this if you haven't seen Moneyball yet. When you go to the window to buy your ticket, ask for a ticket to Cockball and see what happens. They'll probably just give it to you. They probably won't say anything. But I enjoyed it a great deal. I didn't enjoy it as much as you enjoyed Drive, but to each

his own. I'm clearly more into baseball than random wrist slitting. They're both worth seeing, but I like the Moneyball better. I think Drive appeals to... You're a lot older than me, so Drive appeals to a younger...

That doesn't even make sense, because one of the things that's stupid about Drive, if I may be so bold, is all the music sounds like it's temporary music while they were editing it that they pulled from miami vice episodes in the 80s and they're like we'll put real music in later and then they're like oh it's so cool to have shitty music that doesn't fit throughout the entire movie

like that was that was one thing that i i appreciate the effort in that regard but i thought that was a little off-putting like i didn't get the point of it it's just a stylized choice he made a very definitelyized choice. It definitely felt like that he gave someone a chance to do the director. I'm assuming. Oh, yeah. What's the director's name? Fuck. I don't know. Three words. It's a fucked up name. What is it? It's like the middle name.

No, not Brett Ratner. Oh, fucking Brett Ratner. He's got it. He's got it. What is it? Huh? No, no. It's like three names, but it's really weird. Now I'm dying to know what it is. Somebody look it up. Nicholas something.

Get out your goddamn phones and look this shit up. There's a middle name. Winters? Winding, yes. No, it's like winding. Winding rain. Winding rain. It sounds like a fucking Indianing rain. Winding rain. Winding rain. It sounds like a fucking Indian name.

Nicholas Winding Rain. What I was going to say was that it's almost like he gave someone the right to do the soundtrack and then just forgot to listen to it before the movie came out. He's like, oh, we'll just trust what they do.

And then it's just like really... Very distracting. I agree with you. Or it was a throwback to the movie The Driver that actually was... He was doing a throwback to Michael Mann movies from the 80s.

Like Thief or something like that is what he was doing. It was a distinct choice. I say throw it back then. As long as you're doing the throwback. What have you seen, Jeff Tate? I saw Attack the Block last week. Nice.

Thank you. It was only $6.50. Did you see the applause I got for that that's more than girls man only 650 like it was a bargain matinee or something yeah yeah yeah so that's you could play time I go you can probably see that same movie for $12 in Los Angeles during the day. Yeah, there's bargain prices everywhere you go. But it's really good, right? It's fun. They had music and stuff, like that Drive movie.

It was great. I liked all of them. I like movies that have music and stuff. But yeah, that's a good movie, so congratulations. You picked a better movie than Jared. What? Albert Brooks slit the guy's wrist right at the end.

That does not happen in Attack the Block. It happened somewhere. We all know about it now. That happens sometimes. You hear about some famous scene and then you finally see the movie years later and go, somewhere. We all know about it now. That happens sometimes. You hear about some famous scene, and then you finally see the movie years later and go, oh, that's what they were talking about. That's what they meant by a drive-by fruiting.

Oh, shit. This is Doubtfire, y'all. Hello. Hello. You're in a date fire. What have you seen lately, Graham Elwood? I just saw a little documentary called Pearl Jam 20. Oh, very nice.

It was so great. It was directed by Cameron Crowe. It was awesome. If you're a fan of them like I am, it was just awesome. Like three or four people here are. Well, whatever. What was the music like? Even flow

Hey please Don't sing on the podcast There's gonna be There's gonna be money issues Down the road In fairness That was unrecognizable That totally

I don't know about you guys But that sounded like Jeremy to me. Even though spoken. But tell me about the movie, Graham. Convince somebody that's not a fan of Pearl Jam. Why would you go? I mean, I like them, but is it like... That's like saying someone who hates going to baseball...

I didn't say hate at all. I said didn't like. I guess as a film, Cameron Crowe is a good filmmaker. Let's go back to Phil Juano and the U2 Rattle and Hum. Is it like that? Is it very cinematic? Or is it more like a real close look at Eddie and the guys? There's interesting stuff.

There's some cinematic stuff that Cameron Crowe shot, obviously, in the last year or so on high-def cameras, and that's really cool. And then there's old footage from when they first came out in the 80s in Seattle, and that stuff is really cool. And to see how Cameron put those two together I thought was awesome. But if you're just like, eh, okay about Pearl Jam, I think you'll like the film.

You know what I mean? But I think, I don't know, I think they just made it for all their crazy fans. I don't know. I don't know that there's any, I would have to hear

some really compelling evidence about any band documentary. Why are you putting that on your face? Any band documentary about a band. Alright, motherfucker. He punches himself in the face with a microphone

just to stay awake. I just want to attack the block. Is that new? I live in Cincinnati, man. It came out a week ago. I don't live in fucking Hollywood, man. I'm sorry I didn't go to the hard block. They're showing this movie, Pearl Jam 20, at towns all over the entire US.

So get a goddamn computer. It might not be opening in Cincinnati, though, Graham. No, they're rolling it out over the whole country. It's awesome. So it is a rollout? It's a rollout.

I'll see it in eight months. I can't wait eddie vetter holds the boom box up and plays better man into that girl's window cameron crowe right i knew something and then he yells does anyone remember laughter you guys are dicks man Anyone remember laughter? You guys are dicks, man. I like Kate Hudson. Well, speaking of dicks, we saw a movie. Speaking of dicks.

Graham and I saw a movie on the plane that had like zero dicks in it. It was called Something Borrowed. What the fuck is Kate Hudson? Oh, my God. What is her fucking point? Like, what is she doing? Yeah, why? What is she doing? Kate Hudson, why?

She was in Almost Famous, got nominated for Academy Award. That was a good movie. And then she's never done a single compelling, interesting movie. And I challenge you, what is a good Kate Hudson movie? Fool's gold.

The challenge remains. Yeah, her and Matthew McConaaughey are just a fucking i think mcconaughey makes an occasional good movie yes yes you're ruining my point she has never made a decent movie ever all of the characters she picks think of one the least likable since almost famous right since almost famous you can't think of one there's not there's not one gossip what what's this someone just said how to lose a guy how to lose a guy in 10 days oh my god that's the least likable fucking character something borrowed they're going neck and neck for least likable kate hudson characters you and jeff tate need to leave girls man Hudson characters. You and Jeff Tate need to leave. Girls, man.

The girl in the back that loves 10 Things I Hate About You Wait, that's not what it's called. How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. I get them mixed up. But the girl like that probably is the one person that saw In the Theater, No Streams Attached, and Friends with Benefits. Yeah, she went to the fucking 1201 showing midnight.

Oh, this is gonna be awesome. But yeah, I should say It's unfair to say that we watched something borrowed on the plane Because I think we both lasted about 45 minutes into it And then we both were like Oh, there's better things to do Like stare at my feet So Girls, man

Is apparently now your getter done. Yeah, it's working. People are going to yell at you. It's not about that. It's about the girls, man. It's about the laughs. What's something borrowed about? She's just like, hey, can I use that?

Look at the Cincinnati in the next year. You guys saw it on a plane? Yeah. Yeah, it'll be out in December. You gotta get a gig and get them on a plane. Yeah. You gotta work. Were you guys going on vacation or something?

Yeah, Doug and I go on vacation. Barbados! We're just gonna watch movies And sit on the beach Girls man Jeremy Sparks No no no Don't sing Don't sing

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Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing Don't sing the music, Don't sing the music, Don't sing the music, Don the music, Don the music, Don the music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The music, The You can always sing things that are in public domain Like she's a grand old flag She's a high flying flag Just do it any better stuff She's a grand old Grand old star How I want

Take a tale of Soldier spy Trying to keep it movies. So, that looks good. Gary Oldman is the star of it. It's nice to see him starring in a movie. I saw him in an airport and I didn't talk to him. Because he's that cool.

I was like, I'm going to leave Gary Oldman alone. I'm not going to bother that old man. I got it. Thank you for getting it. That's another way to go. Just make up songs, Graham. Just make up like an Eddie Vedder song. What would an Eddie Vedder song about girls sound like?

would a better song about girls sound like? I was bartending in a movie I didn't know. Girls, man. Good night. That was more like Springsteen or Bon Jovi. Which reminds me. There's no difference. I'm sorry. I just made fun of a guy I just supported. Way to go. Hi. Look at me. You lost everybody in New Jersey with that comment. Just so you guys know that are here tonight at the Comedy Attic in Bloomington, Indiana, not Illinois or Michigan. Where's the other one? Minnesota.

Minnesota. You answered that like there was prizes involved. All right, you win all this shit. You knew it was in Minnesota. But after party tonight, there's a live band karaoke at a club down the street called Bluebird. And if you want to hear Graham Elwood...

If you want to hear Graham Elwood sing some Bon Jovi. Oh, shit. All right, guess what? You guys are all going to be a little wanted, dead, or alive. I'll tell you that right now. You ever see me on a steel horse I ride? Guess what? Six string on my back.

I think we can't do lyrics either. I think we can't. There's no, no one's getting sued yet. So we can say we can't. Oh, yeah, yeah. My episodes are going to be rife with bleeps down the road when they work that out. Because somebody in the music industry is going, wait a second. Podcasts are just using our songs and not paying us.

So let's play some games. Let's get off of the music. Let's get some games going. First of all, for the real diehard fans, let's play Build a Title. You guys are looking around like you might not know what I'm talking about. Shot in Indiana as a move, as a title I decided to use.

I vaguely remember this movie, but supposedly it was shot here. It's directed by Arthur Penn and it stars Craig. And the movie Craig Wasson. And the movie is called Four... You guys alright down there? Graham's eating something. Graham's trying to unwrap some... I'm just having a protein bar.

He's got a very regimented schedule. Yeah. I have to eat. Even during a show. An alarm went off. Oh, it's time for my 8.46 protein bar. If he doesn't eat this now, how is he going to plank at 915?

Yeah. I just found out about it. I just learned it, used it in context. You're one sharp-dressed man. That's a lyric. Can't say it. Another episode of Stoner Attorney. You can say the title of a song, dummy.

You were kind of singing it. Alright, build a title. B-A-T, Bat. It's Bat Monday here in Bloomington. And the movie's called Four Friends. We'll start with Graham down there on the end. You can add a title that ends in four or begins in friends. There are movies that do each, if you think about it. Fantastic Four Friends.

Like it. Protein bar. Fantastic Four Friends with Benefits. That was fortunate that came up earlier. Yeah. That's why I heard about it. Hey, that was fortunate that came up earlier. Yeah. All right, so now... That's why I heard about it. Now you have to come up with a movie, Jared,

that ends in fantastic or begins in benefits. And here's the thing. You can use parts of words. Okay. You can't use the fan, unfortunately, because we eliminate the word the. Okay. But that would have been good.

The Fantastic Four Friends. But I think there's some business you can do with benefits. If you think about it. I can start with fantastic, is what you're saying. No, you can end with fantastic or start with benefits. But, break down the word benefits. Okay.

How about Ben-her? Not en-a-fits and not Ben-her. No? benefits. Okay. Not benefits and not Ben-her. No. No. Shit. Okay. So nothing? Well, I don't know. It's not important. I'm going to go with it's not important. This is just for fun.

Okay, never mind. I'm going to lose the whole thing now because I don't know what I'm doing on this. It's all right. This game is just for fun. There's no pressure. That was as quiet as anyone's been all night. I was just kidding. Everyone feels so bad for you that you're not going to win anything in this game where there's no prizes and no stakes.

Crazy. All right, so you're out. You'll be back for Leonard Maltin don't worry it's just a little while from now but I've got one because I planned this I planned for this to happen

Fantastic Four Friends with Bene Fitzcarraldo yeah that's some real shit. It's a heavy ass movie that I never saw. About trying to get a boat up a river, I think. So then we go to Graham Elwood. So you have to end it fantastic or start with dope. Fittscarraldo!

Delight Fantastic for Fitzcarraldo. There's a movie called Delight Fantastic? Yep. Alright, let's look that up on my phone. Let's confirm that.

Let's go to, let's use IMDB, because of course IMDB. What's it called again? The Light Fantastic? Yup. Okay. It's so hard to say it like that. The Light... So far they're just suggesting the Light Keepers.

That are fantastic. They suggesting the Light Keepers. Stunner Fantastic. They are fantastic Light Keepers. Starring Richard Dreyfuss and Blythe Danner. Fantastic. Search. Oh, shit! Boom! It's a movie from 1964 starring Dolores McDougal and Barry Bartle.

Bam! Sounds like Jeremy spoke in class today, didn't he? See, Jeffrey, why were you like, your film descriptions were boring. It's because I fucking got mad knowledge, motherfucker. Buckle up, son. You're right. You do have angry information.

I do. My information is always very angry. What time is it? Fucking 8.45, motherfucker! Which is two minutes off. Nice Batman shirt, Chris, in the front row. Light Fantastic Four, friends with Ben Fitzcarraldo.

And we go to Jeff. Do the right thing. Do the right thing? Sure. Sorry, you're out. It's a D-O. No, you're out. That was fast. Well, you're out. It's a D.O. No, you're out. That was fast.

Well, you said one that's wrong. It was a good try, though. Alright, I got one. Here we go. Light, Fantastic Four, Friends with Benefits, Coral, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark. Don't the right thing. Daria, Night, Dark Knight, of course. Of course you were going to do that.

Batman. All right. Light, fantastic. Four friends with benefits. Karol, don't be afraid of the dark. Night is a lonely hunter. What? Oh.

So it's, what is it? It's light? Yeah, it has to end in light or start in Hunter. Light or Hunter. Actually, I already got one. I'm ready to bring it home shit coke machine even the coke machine

is concerned about how long you're taking shut up coke machine Jeff Tate needs another beer everybody what are you drinking Jeff Psst. Hunter. Psst. Psst. Shut up, Coke machine. Jeff Tate needs another beer, everybody. What are you drinking, Jeff? And a water. A PBR and a water.

A beer and a water, because we don't have any tables up here, so that's great that you're getting two beverages. I'm getting two. Yeah. Oh, Jared's getting a water. Jared probably needs another one, because he just ate that granola bar. A protein bar. Sorry, sorry.

Big difference. It was a Snickers protein bar, which means it was not a protein bar. No, it was a pure protein bar was the name of it, sir. I have the wrapper on your stage. 20 grams of protein. I love that wrapper pure protein. Oh, he's fucking the shit. He's great.

All right, Graham, enough stalling. Do you have anything? Ends in light, starts with Hunter. God dang. anything um ends in light starts with uh hunter um god dang hunter for red october nice try you're out um oh now i'm blank i pull out the great boom and then i can't do the bang bang. I'm blanking. It's Too Bad Afternoon Delight isn't a movie. Maybe it is. Light, Fantastic Four,

Friends of Ben, The Fitzcarral, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark, Night is a Lonely Hunt, Terminator 2, Judgment Day. Oh, man. Oh, man. That's so good. That's how you play Build a Title Alright now

Shall we play another game? Yeah This is it you guys What we're all here for Why you brought name tags Please hold them up now. These are awesome. Yeah, there's so many good ones.

You guys are awesome, man. So you guys, Jared, Jeff, Graham, go out into the audience. He's full of power bars, so he's not going to want a cookie. But go out into the audience and pick your name tag

and bring it back to your seat. There's a cookie that's got a pot leaf on it, so of's not going to want a cookie. Go out into the audience and pick your name tag and bring it back to your seat. There's a cookie that's got a pot leaf on it, so of course I'm attracted to that. Texas Ranger. This one has... This guy's already got a woot monkey that says Francis on it. Oh my god. You have like a light in a box, Aaron? Kyle back there has got a Doug Loves Cameras sign.

So does Amanda. Beth has a fire helmet. Be sure to look on this side. Check out the other side of the L, you guys. This girl just put Danielle on the back of her phone that she did in class today. What does it say? Not what, Jordan? Not Mike Jordan?

Who's Mike Jordan? Crystal made a phone. Oh, my God. You guys went so great, man. This is so... Let's see. What else we got back here? Trevor. This part is harder than I ever thought it was.

Did you look over here, Jeff? There's some guy way in the back going, Anything you could do to make the process take longer would be great. Because it's really fun to listen to. On the podcast, they love just listening to Indecision. Oh, I like that robot helmet over there. Who love just listening to Indecision. Yes!

Oh, I like that robot helmet over there. Who's that supposed to be? Just something you stole? I like it. God, there's so many good ones. It looks like that rusty copper bottom or whatever from that movie Robots. Rusty Copper Pot? What was his name?

Chester Copper Pot? You know what? I gotta go with Crystal. She did this paper mache phone. Alright, get the paper mache phone and get back up here. Alright. And give all you guys a round of applause. You guys all did amazing signs.

The toughest part about doing this is only picking one. Like seriously. Thanks for holding my water. So that's a giant phone that then has a box in the middle of it that says crystal I like big and it's in this glittery so it's an interesting name tag picked picked by an interesting player so Graham was playing for crystal Jeff is playing for... Greg. Greg, where's the name tag? It's right here.

Oh, it's the cookie. Oh, cookie name tags. Yeah, that's always fun. We tore into that cookie in Baltimore. We ate the shit out of that. And then Jared's playing for... I am playing for Melinda. Let's see it.

It's right here. And the reason it's like this is because she's working. And she's here right now because we needed somebody to work at the last minute. She was supposed to be here. And not to get very sentimental, but my wife was able to take the night off with our son. And she worked for her. So I decided she was going to have her name tag in the audience. That's nice.

That makes our phone and cookie look real shitty. This is a guest check that has Melinda scribbled on it in a way that you can't even read that it says Melinda. She's working. She's working very hard. All right, pick somebody else. No, I'm just kidding. It was such a sweet reason for him to play for her, I thought that would be fun to be a dick about it.

All right, well, good luck. Does she want all this crap? I don't know. Okay. Probably not. She probably doesn't want it as much as the people who paid to be here, but that's cool. about it. Alright, well good luck. Does she want all this crap? I don't know. She probably doesn't want it as much as the people who paid to be here, but that's cool. Crystal, it sounds like we have a new catchphrase that's in the running with the girls man on the back of her phone.

It says, hello, hello baby. So put that in your sequel, Jeff, to bartender of girls man. We're not done shooting. Might be in the first one. Got reshoots coming up? There's a scene where I gotta answer the phone. Jeff Tate, everybody.

At JeffTate96 on Twitter. And it turns out the bar he works at is called Hello Baby. Hello, Hello Baby. I should call the sign guy. We're going to make it, never mind. We'll edit it out. Okay.

So let's go ahead and play the Leonard Mullen game and see who wins the prizes. I'm just going gonna stand up for this and also you know since this side of the L since no one was chosen over here I want to still want them to be felt like they were part of the audience that's what you sound like Accurate impression Always hurts Alright, here we go Sorry, I'm sorry, Crystal

I'm trying to prop your thing up so people can see it And it just fell over The people listening at home, they don't know where it is It's hanging from the ceiling It's fucking awesome It's radio controlled You're right they can't tell I already ate that cookie Alright the name day is gone

Pick another person to play for The fucker ate my cookie Didn't even play for me Alright we'll start on this end With Jared Mark our way down towards Graham cookie. Didn't even play for me. Alright, we'll start on this end with Jared and work our way down towards Graham. And Jared gets to pick a category. Would you like, I was just

up at the Toronto International Film Festival had a lovely time and I created a category called Oh Canada. So that's motion pictures that take place in Canada. And then someone named At Frank DeRugiero D-E-R-U-G-I-E-R-O With two G's.

He suggested Kill Em Defoe. That's movies where Willem Defoe gets killed. And then At Peter Christian Spelled like the first name Peter and the word Christian he suggested Best Picture Losers

that's movies that were nominated for the Best Picture Academy Award and then ended up losing so which one of those would you like to play Jared? I'll take Best Picture Losers please okay, this Best Picture Loser and again, reminder to the audience I know you guys all know how this works but please don't yell out

if the answer comes into your head because sometimes it's hard not to be excited about it and what's going on with you guys? I asked if you could

hold my drink oh okay talking to the microphone club owner use proper mic technique guy who doesn't talk into mics except to test them

before your acts show up three stars from Leonard Maltin for this movie I think that is mic technique guy who doesn't talk into mics except to test them before your acts show up. Three stars from Leonard Maltin for this movie. I think that is generous. It's from 2009, was nominated for Best Picture and did not win. Some things he says about it are that it is

innovative and he also says about it that it is thrilling at times. And hence the only three stars, I guess. And then there are nine names, I think. Yeah, nine names.

And say the category again, please. The category is movies that were nominated for Best Picture and did not win from 2009. How many names do you think you can get out of nine? Jared Thompson, owner of Comedy Attic in Bloomington, Indiana. I'll go with four. Good opening bid. Then we go to Jeff Tate.

Three. G-E-O-F-F. Tate says three. Graham Elwood. Name that movie, Jeff Tate. Okay, Jeff. Would you like the clues again? Yeah.

Did you just bid yourself into a corner? I thought that was how the game was played. Nobody puts Hello, Hello baby in a corner. All right. Here are your clues. 2009, three stars. Some people in the audience already know what it is, I bet. It was nominated for Best Picture, did not win.

Leonard calls it innovative and thrilling at times. And the three names are Laz Alonzo. Yeah, the great Laz Alonzo. Wes Studi. That's actually a good clue. And CCH Pounder.

Which of course is my poor name Jeff Tate what is as a nine yes sir that's my guess did not win is it Michael Clayton did not win Best Picture in 2009 what's what is it Michael Clayton that is is incorrect. But nice try. Thank you for coming. You lost. That was awesome. Jared just threw his hat into the sore winner's sweepstakes.

He's just like, it was so like a six year old kid you lost that was fucking rad dude is it the shield? what? is it the shield? the TV show The Shield?

is the CCH band in that? it lost out to fucking Bachelorette for best picture Bachelorette is a reality movie? Yeah, yeah. It's a different category. You are right.

CCH Pounder was in The Shield. That's all I was saying. She was in The Shield, so in that sense, it's a good guess. In the sense that it's a TV show, not a movie, makes it a bad guess. Seems like a movie. Who in the audience thinks they know it?

What it is from all that we've heard so far. Avatar is correct, sir avatar they're making an avatar section at disney world in florida sweet they're spending 500 million dollars on it wow yeah i'm like i want to call up james cameron and go hey how about some food for some people? Yeah. Instead of creating your bullshit Pandora, why not feed millions of people? Because 500 million would feed millions. But think about this. That's like two and a half billion dollars, and we could have

just not ever had that movie. And he could have used all that money on the people. You took my point and expanded upon it in a way that I don't necessarily understand a less effective what would they have been paying for

to give the money it might have been 500 million dollars on the ride or whatever but it cost 2 billion or whatever for the shitty movie just not have done any of that shit oh yeah I see what you're saying just never have done it at all yeah and then make The Rock like a hundred times. 2012!

He's right, he's right. You are a forward thinker, Jeff Tate. Yeah. I think what he's saying is, yes, you're correct. Three stars is very generous. For Avatar. I think it is. People love it, so I don't want to get too down on it.

Go to Disney World and walk around and go, I'm in Pandora. And then fucking kill yourself. It's not just a ride, dude. It's a whole... It's going to be a whole immersive environment. It's going to be like, why go see the Avatar 2 and 3 once you've walked around Pandora? It's like, I guess those next movies,

you'd be like, well, I've been there. So that'll add some excitement. What's weird is that whole section is going to be in 2D. It's just cardboard cutouts of Pandora. I will wear those glasses to the Pandora at Disney World and walk around going, wow, it's like everything's real. None of those three people were in the first 40 minutes of Avatar and that's all I saw. Because I realized 40 minutes in I could leave. And it was like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders hang on a second let me

double check this really quick so you're saying that you know that Laz Alonso wasn't in the first 30 minutes of the movie I forget when Wes Studi shows up. He's the Indian dude that's... Didn't know there were Indians. And CCH Pounder, she's like one of the politicians or officers or something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think you're thinking of Tyler Perry from Star Trek. Right, right. That's right. Where Madea goes to Vulcan. Where Madea goes to Vulcan. Grandmama, that's a death grip. Oh, baby, live long and prosper. I'd do this all night.

Can but won't. Here we go. All right. So, what happened there? Graham got the point because you made him name it? Boom. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

Great. I lost. Great work. Oh, you're all right. You're still at zero. You don't get negative points for doing that. Oh, yeah. alright. You're still at zero. You don't get negative points for doing that. Oh yeah, in your face. I'm the loser and we're still tied, idiot.

But here's where it comes back to haunt you because Jared gets to start the next round. But we go the other way. That's right, and then we go to Graham. So you might not even get to you because those guys are sharks. So here we go, Jared. You get to pick a category. Would you like...

Where do we end up at? Best pick loser. So then the next one would be it's Jim Caviezel's birthday today. Oh my god! Where did the year go, you guys? The great Jim Caviezel Jim Caviezel day already Holy shit

You guys all have the day off from work That's why you didn't know That's why we're here today I can't believe it's already his birthday again Like you just show up at the bank Oh god damn it Caviezel day again That's right the bus is running a slower schedule.

It's a holiday bus schedule for Caviezel Day. Jim Caviezel Spooky. Don't sing. Don't sing. Please. Please don't sing. For two reasons. Alright, so, jared would you like the jim caviezel or at jj line hand three jj line l-i-n-e hand three as in i i i uh suggested the thing because there's a new uh the thing coming out that's like I guess it's supposed to be a prequel with

Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who I adore. And the movie is... The category, The Thing, in honor of that movie coming out, is movies that have the word thing in the title. There's a few of those. And then, at W Passin, P-A-S-S-I-N,

suggested, no, she didn't. And that's categories where the title has a contraction. Didn't would be an example. Which one of those would you like to play, Jared? Since my Jim Caviezel joke didn't land, I'll take that one. That's why you picked it? Yeah. It's as you picked it? Yeah. It's as good a reason as any.

Yeah, that's right. Three stars for this movie that Jim Caviezel is in from Leonard Maltin. The year, of course, I should say is 1998. Leonard calls this movie ethereal. And he says that this movie... The film's strengths outweigh its perfections. What? Imperfections.

Imperfections. Yeah, man. That's crazy. Leonard Mung gets crazy with this. Yeah, he does. He goes nuts. Let me say it again. This movie's flaws

outweigh its imperfections. God damn it. You did it again, Doug. I say it again. This movie's flaws outweigh its imperfections. God damn it, you did it again, Doug. I did it again. Jesus. If it gets a laugh the first time, why not? All right, the strengths outweigh its imperfections. That's what he's saying, which he says about pretty much every movie. He's like, it's good, but it's not so good.

Three stars again, I should say, 1998. And there are 17 names? He's like, it's good, but it's not so good. Three stars again, I should say. 1998. And there are... 17 names? Yeah, 17 names. How many names do you think you get in Jared Thompson, The Comedy Addict, Bloomington, Indiana?

I'll go with six. Six names. Strong opening bid. Not fucking around. Bobcat Goldthwait here, October 6th and 7th. Graham? I believe in the go big or go home, so I will come up with the number of zero.

Zero. That's what you want me to do. I really wish you'd just go home. Negative one. Negative one. Who was that? Who said that? I said that.

I said that. Jeff Tate said that? Jeff Tate, everybody. Gauntlet thrown down. As soon as I saw your haircut tonight, Jeff, I was like, you look more aerodynamic. You're going to do good. That's actually what I asked for at the super cuts.

You're like, what kind of cut can you give me where I'll get places faster? I ride a lot of 10 speed. And I'm tired of drag making me late. That was all fucking great, you guys. Here's the thing. People are excited

about the game. They don't really want these sidebar jokes. Negative one. Negative one. The people at home or someone at home is laughing. So you know that you

got some home runs at home. Yeah. I'll see you later, man. That's what I say after every set in a comedy club. Someone at home

is laughing. All right. So we go negative one. Back to you, Jared. Can you go negative more names or do you have to see if Mr. Tate can pull it off? I'm not so sure I understand how what do I give you two names? You don't understand negative names? Oh no, I get it. Okay, no.

Just stop. I don't want to do this. I do not want to be on this podcast. I'm out. I'm leaving, I get it. Okay, no. Just stop. I don't want to do this. I do not want to be on this podcast. I'm out. I'm leaving. I'm done. I'm gone. Fuck Melissa. Fuck my wife and child. I do not need this shit. Like, literally, you should just, like, I picture you just walking and

taking your clothes off as you walk and you're just done. He's going to walk all the way to, where's the nearest body of water? He's going to walk to it. He's going to find a kiddie pool and walk into it. Walk into it. Splash. All right, so I name it?

Yeah, name that movie. Hang on, hang on. Let's build the suspense. Let's recap what's going on. So Jared has to say the words, name that movie, to officially give up his spot. Because you can't go negative two names, right?

You don't think you know the top two names of the cast? No. Jim Caviezel. No, you may not even be that. I'm going to go name that movie. Okay, so then now we go to Jeff and he has to name it and you went negative two, so you have to name in order. I went negative one. I want negative it and you went negative two so you have to name in order I went negative one good one I want negative two I'll give it the second

no all you got to do I gotta do is name the movie and the top billed performer in the movie the movie is the movie the thin red line and who's the top performer Caviezel Jim Caviezel nobody is he Doesn't he star in it Well he's one of Several people in it I think he's got like His billing What is it alphabetical

He's billed No it's in It's in like star power He's billed third As it turns out Oh So George Clooney

But it was a good try John Cusack Elias Koteas Yes Elias Koteas Yeah Koteas isn't even listed Oh there he is Cusack? Elias Codius? Elias Codius! Codius isn't even listed. Oh, there he is. He's six and Cusack's seven.

And number one is Sean Penn. It's a Terrence Malick movie. Yeah, yeah. So Jared gets a point! Jared! You knew it, though. You knew what the movie was Jared's on the board

The movie was Thin Red Line That was impressive Jeff You really went for it I'm eating this cookie But just for future You can have that regardless of what happens Do you mind if I have Can I have a piece later?

Later. There's nothing tastier than... I thought Caviezel started... I remember when it came out and I thought that he was the star. I forgot Sean Penn was in it. Yeah, yeah. There's 17 fucking people in it that he listed.

Travolta was in there. But, you know, you tried. And just for, you know, you tried. And just for future reference, just because the category is an actor doesn't mean they're going to be the top-billed one. No, I know. I just actually thought he was the top-billed one. I thought it was one of those things

where you put that guy and then all the famous people. I think for Jim Caviezel to get top billing, he has to get nailed to a cross. I think that's the only time that's happened. There was that Angel Eyes where J-Lo came in. Fuck you, Caviezel. I'm top billed. I don't even know what else he was in.

What's that? Frequency. Frequency? Was he the lead in that? No way. Dennis Quaid. Dennis Quaid was the lead in that. There's no way Caviezel was the lead in that.

Do you remember there being a cross in Frequency? No cross. Dennis Quaid. Dennis Quaid was elite in that. There's no way Caviezel was elite in that. Do you remember there being a cross in frequency? No cross, no top bill. He was probably top billed in something, but I'm just saying. Not Count of Monte Cristo, really. He was? Yeah, he was.

You're right, he was. Who played the Monte Cristo? Was it a sandwich? Alright. Let's get it together, you guys. Pull it up. Jared has a point. Graham has a point. Jeff is in the shithouse.

We start with Graham and we go in the direction of Jeff, right? Okay. Check with the audience to make sure. You don't think so? No, no. It goes back to Jared. Okay. We switch the order. We go the opposite direction. Right?

Everyone's in disagreement now. Jared, Jeff. Jeff, Jared. Jared told me to name it. So it went this way. Graham Jared Jeff. Yeah. So it'll go the other way. Alright. So it's me. Graham

is naming it. Yeah. You start. Would you like at Tad T-A-D-D Pike Tad Pike suggested Down Under. That's movies with either down or under in the title. That's what he came up with. Yeah, people suggest things.

I pick ones that seem like fun. There's lots of movies with down or under in the title. And it's misleading, because at first you think, oh, it's movies about Australia. Or New Zealand. Summer blockbusters, that's blockbusters that come out during a summer. And then,

I'd like to introduce a new category. I introduced it in the last episode in Toronto. Some people still haven't heard it. This is a new category suggested by Asparagusp. The word asparagus with a P on the end. Asparagusp. At Asparagusp suggested

a category called Zero Names. And here's how this works. It's a fun wrinkle. Graham Elwood, if you pick this movie, I will read the entire review to you. And then, I won't tell you how many names

or what names. I'll tell you, yeah, I won't tell you. I could tell you how many names. But I won't tell you how many names or what names. I'll tell you. Yeah, I won't tell you. I could tell you how many names, but I won't tell you any of them because you get automatically zero names. But I read the entire review, and then you have to start out the bidding. So it starts at zero. Yeah, so you could say zero or pick a negative number. But then when it comes down here to Jared, then he can call you on it or go even more negative. So it's a tricky category to pick.

You might want to go with... I accept this category, Douglas. And I salute both sides of the L. That's how you nail it, kid. I didn't know people sat over there. Hey, first of all, Jared, really quick. Great idea with the brick wall. That's fantastic.

I've never seen that in a comedy club. Hey, what happened to the red mic cords? I was headlining here in July and you got this red mic cord and I made fun of it and you're like, I got that specifically to match this theme of the place. What is... I don't deserve this, goddammit!

We still have the red cords, actually And we don't have the mic stand So fuck off I like Finally, finally another guest tells Graham to fuck off I like the red cords I thought it would be Leonard Maldon that would say that to him But it took Jared Thompson to make it happen I like the red corks. I thought it would be Leonard Maldon that would say that to him.

But it took Jared Thompson to make it happen. That episode was so great. You were like, hey, can I call you Len? And he goes, no. Nobody caught Jeff's comediatric attendance joke that there's never anybody over here unless you're here, pretty much. He pointed to me on that. Usually it's just like ten people up here, but anyway. Yeah, no, this is a great little club, and it's shaped like 10 people up here But anyway Yeah, no, this is a great little club

And it's shaped like an L When you were explaining it It made it sound worse I know, everybody was like, oh no, we need to make donations Hey, after this you should see if Crystal Can take that question mark off your shirt Fucking exclamation point Yeah, because you and all those other guys

have been on the show now. It's official. Unless this one gets lost. I'm going to throw my sweaty shirt into the audience like a Reggie Miller or something. How about that? People seem to like the idea. Not everybody. Someone at home likes the idea, Jared. They're so excited about it.

Reggie Miller's laughing his ass off right now. He's a huge podcaster. I can't believe my example was Reggie Miller. It was so weird. Why did I do that? He probably never did that. Why not like Detlef Schrempf or somebody else? Some other notable Indiana paste.

All right, Graham Elwood. You're playing, as suggested by Aspera Gusp, you're playing zero names. You have to start the bidding at zero names. Everyone in this room will probably know or have a good idea what this movie is. I bid zero. After I read.

No, you can go into negative names. Don't pre-bid. You bid zero, name that movie. Yeah, because however many... You're going to know the movie is the point. So Graham can start with as many negative names as he thinks he can pull it off in, and it's tricky.

So, and please, no muttering of names, you guys, because you're going to be wondering yourself what the billing was on this. Three and a half stars from Leonard Maltin. I go four stars, personally. Yeah, and here's the review. 1979. Winning unpretentious film

about four college-age friends in Bloomington, Indiana. in Bloomington, Indiana. Who don't know what to do with their lives. Dooley stands out in this first-rate cast as Christopher's bewildered father. This sleeper hit really comes to life

with an audience. May not play as well on TV. I don't know what that means, but I do wish people would watch it with an audience, because I love it. Steve Tesich's original screenplay won well-deserved Oscar, later spawned a brief TV series. Everyone knows what it is.

I've already mentioned two of the cast members. There are... 11 names? Sirens, sirens, sirens! Oh, we gotta hurry up. No, I know what the movie is. There's 12 names, Graham. So how many negative names do you think you can get this in?

Or you could start with zero and see what happens when we go to... Who's next, Jared? Jared. I'll go zero names. Jeff just has to wait in suspense so now you have to go negative names and I have to go negative and I have to know the top yeah yeah yeah so you can go negative one if you know the one this category is harder than you think because knowing who the billing is is the toughest part of this. Can I go in any order?

No, it has to be in the proper order. It's a specific... No, it has to be in the correct order. I'm going to go negative one. He keeps asking the same question. Wait a second, what about if I don't say them in the same order? What about if I don't do it in the same order? Negative one. He goes negative one.

So now Jeff needs to know. Wow, aggressive. Jared You have to say it. Negative one. He goes negative one. So now Jeff needs to know. Wow. Aggressive. Jared has found his strength. He tells me to fuck off. He's going mic to mic on tape. He's ripping up the question mark. He's like, this is my fucking club.

We got red mic fucking cords. Now suck it. He just banged his two microphones together. Yeah. That's a good... Name that movie. Or name that person, I guess. I don't even know the movie. Jesus.

Don't mind him. He's a cutter. I got sleeves So Jared, what's the name of the movie? Well it's Breaking Away Which is just a fantastic film Yeah I love it And who's the top billed performer in that movie

For the point and the win Yeah this is big Who's the lead actor in Breaking Away I believe I already mentioned half of his name in the description by Leonard that's messed up

you gave him a big old I'm not going to say it again no I wouldn't think so I I know that you said the dad's name is the dad, and I don't know his first name. It's not the dad. Oh, okay.

Shit. We'll just scramble the letters out and make them fucking... Indiana Jones is the top bill. What does his name rhyme with? Indiana. I mean, I'm just going gonna say Dennis Quaid He's in it But unfortunately

You got the wrong Dennis The lead actor is Dennis Christopher Oh look who got a point Oh Deadlock Deadlock Next point wins We got a three way! Next point wins. We got a three-way tie!

Next point wins. This lady's leaving because she knew her name tag was lame. Oh, that just gave me a boner. Okay, no more visual comedy. Wait, hold on. Let me get my bowling pins. I'm juggling! That's how you juggle.

Alright, let's reassess what's going on here. You each have one point. Jared just asked... I mean, Jeff just asked Jared to name it. And so we're back to Graham and then we'll go to Jeff from Graham

because we're switching the order around again I knew it was breaking away I did not know who the lead was and I was like it's probably some actor

from the 80s that I do not remember and I knew it wasn't Quaid because he was too young of a star in 79 nobody knew who he was this is all out loud yeah

yeah it's all that all that you were just saying was out loud oh shit my bad my bad that's like pacing around in your hotel room later shit yeah i need to say it when he said he said that's me in my hotel room fuck i knew it wasn't dennis quinn hey when he said he already said half his name did you think he said paul dooley because that's the day i did i thought it was julia because i said jul Dooley and Christopher in the review yeah

Indiana Jones remember that joke it's tricky I'm remember that joke oh Jesus I'm excited about the zero names category

I think that's going to be fun it's a great category did you get my tweet today where I was like I suggested a category of movies Jeff Tate has seen

I saw a whole list of them, too. The Rock, Con Air. Foreskin, Dump. Attack the Block. That a Tribe Called Quest documentary. Wait, Jared, what movie did you say? I said Foreskin, Dump.

I'm making fun of him for watching porn. I thought you said Foreskin, Dump. Which made almost as much sense. Right, which is the one I've seen. Oh, sorry. Alright, so... Jeff's into butt porn. Starting with Graham going to Jeff, then maybe

to Jared. We'll see. You just ratted me out. If either one of you ever want to get booked here again, let's go ahead and get down to me for the point. How about that? I will crush you. Hey, but Jared, I can come back though, right? I need the word.

Yeah. Yes, you can. Yes. Jeff just turns and chokes Graham to death. I really need it. Between one of you. Negative four! Jared wins! Okay, Graham. Graham, your options are... Your options, Graham, are O Canada,

Kill Em Defoe, and movies with the word thing in the title. Kill Em Defoe and movies with the word thing in the title I'll go movies with thing in the title one person excited about that category everyone else is like that sounds dumb

this movie has the word thing in the title amongst other words it's not just thing. It's not the story of that hand from the Addams Family. Two and a half stars. Oh, that was it, right? No, it was the hairy thing, right? It wasn't thing, the hand?

Thing is the hand. Cousin It is the one whose face is covered and you never saw it. And it would just go, and they understood it. That was the joke. Again, I knew I said that out loud. Someone at home is fucking so on board with what i said i'm talking to the world my favorite adams family movie thing is in the second one adams family values the baby pubert first of all pubert's hilarious that's just a hilarious name for a baby and then i tried to get jerry to name his baby pubert but he wouldn't go for it.

But then also, Puber has a tiny little mustache. God damn it, I love that. That's the one with the hammer song, too. That's a great one. Yeah, yeah. The Addams Family. No more. You can only do a few notes before you have to get paid

I think it's like five or something I forgot that already happened with you Two and a half stars, Graham For this movie that has thing in the title 1995 is the year Leonard calls it somewhat He calls the main character in the movie Somewhat scattered

And then he also says That A supporting character in the movie somewhat scattered. And then he also says that a supporting actress in the film has all the funniest lines in the picture. And it has the word thing in it. Two and a half stars. 95. And there are nine names. How many names do you think you can get it in? I will go...

G-E. I will go six. Okay. It's a good opening bid Now we go to Geoff Five Okay Jared

Name that movie Oh shit Jared's taking this whole thing down with strategy I know I don't feel confident I don't feel confident How you're going to do with this but we'll see No you're not going to do with this, but we'll see.

You might... No, you're not going to get it. I'll give you the clues again. Two and a half stars. The lead character is somewhat scattered. And there is a supporting character who has all the funniest lines in the picture. And your five names are Anne Shropshire, Muse Watson,

Hayley Owl, Brett Cullen, and this is the one where it might help you, Kira Sedgwick. Oh, no. Muse Wilson? Come on. The movie has thing in the title. While you're thinking, let me just say really quickly

that Graham Elwood and I are going to be performing the weekend of October 28th Through 30th at the Neptune Theater in Seattle, the Punchline in San Francisco And the Punchline in Sacramento And since it's Halloween weekend I thought it would be fun to suggest That people come dressed as their favorite movie character

Or as a movie character That has the same name as them As their name tag So that's Halloweenlloween weekend seattle san francisco and sacramento we'll see if anybody does it might happen what are you talking about over there jeff why are you conferring with jared i was asking if you had talking the microphone jared please i just asked a professional comedian i just asked if you knew it that's all oh okay and i asked him if he had any open weeks coming up.

Hey, could you pencil me in for February? He did run over Graham on the stage to get next to me. It's true. Not true. 1995? Uh-huh.

It's got thing in the title. Yeah, is it Things They do in Denver When you're dead? No But That would be a good guess Because it does have the word

Thing in the title And we all We all Everyone that listens to the podcast Loves the state of Denver Oh yeah I remember that one It's a good one

The best part about that was There was another category With who, what, when, where, why And that one would have been remember that one It's a good one The best part about that was there was another category With who what when where why And that one would have been in that one But you put it in the state one There was when in it Things to do in Denver when you're dead And if you were doing who what when where why and states Then you were like Denver's a state but not a when

Yeah I get confused sometimes It happens me too i'm no i'm no alex say jack or pat trebek so you got nothing other than that that was it things doing different yeah that's all okay that's not it i'm embarrassed but But Graham let's go ahead and sing Cause the movie's called Let's give them something to talk about Yeah That fucked up movie

Jenna Rollins, Robert Duvall Dennis Quaid and Julia Roberts Mews is a fucking kid actor's name For sure Should have guessed kids in a movie right That was sort of a clue, I guess. That was a tough one, dude. That was a tough one.

That was a tough movie. I was going to go with Nothing to Lose, but... That's another word with thing in the title. You're really picking this up. You're really getting the hang of this.

I'll have you back on again sometime and it'll be great. It's like a nice dry run. But Jared Thompson is our winner, everybody. I knew you'd be a tough competitor. God damn it!

And who were you playing for? Melinda. Yeah, where's she at though? She's right there. Hi, Melinda. Hi. Yay! Melinda, thank you for taking Dana's ship so she could be home with their beautiful son. Yeah, so that prize package includes a Palm Strike t-shirt.

Graham Elwood always has those at his shows. Don't forget, it also includes his CD though that he added later. Don't forget that. And she gets two tickets to see Bobcat next week. That's weird. Melinda, give me the tickets back. Yeah, let's give it to somebody.

It was just written on a piece of paper. So let's give, can we give two tickets to each of the people that Graham and Jeff played for absolutely consolation prize but anyway like I was saying Graham will be hanging out with his t-shirts tonight if anybody here want tonight wants to get one and also you can go to comedy film nerds calmcom to get... What is that? Why would you think I was done? Let me walk you through it.

I'm going to say one person's a shithead. Then I'm going to say another person's a shithead. Then bring the music in. That'll be perfect. And again, this is all just practice. The episode's probably going to get lost anyway. Because that was the same thing that happened the night the episode got lost. The theme song came on at the wrong time.

The theme song's haunted. Yeah, that's the problem. So, comedyfilmnerds.com is where you can go to get Graham's stuff. Yes, sir. Let's hear it one more time for Graham Elwood, everybody. Thank you so much! Nice. And Jeff,

did they write the shithead on the back of their... Yes, they did. Nicely done. You guys are prepared with your shitheads on the back of the name tags. That was the name tag? Or they put that with the cookie? Nice. Take a bite out of your cookie and tell us

if it's any good or not cookie Don't shout it at me It's weird Eat it Fucking eat the cookie Just try a little piece of it It's kind of like a pizza It's hard to open That's good

We need like a knife or something No you don't It's the girl in the front row Who hasn't eaten We need a knife or something. No, you don't. It's the girl in the front row who hasn't eaten. You don't need a knife. Eat some of it. Pass it around. I like those big balloon things. They look gnarly.

Anyway, it looks delicious. I'm going to fucking eat the shit out of this cookie right now. Okay, here we go. Graham is back to eat. I thought you were going to set up your merch table. But he came back to eat some cookie. There you go. Graham Elwood, everybody. Hey, Graham, real quick.

Do you have any dates coming up you want to plug? Anything that they need to know about? Yes, I'll be in Lake Tahoe October 5 through 9. Just like hanging out? Yeah, just playing craps at Harvey's so get your dice hands

warmed up you sons of bitches you're at the improv there I'll be at the improv at Harvey's hotel and casino in South Lake Tahoe okay Graham Millwood

everybody thank you thank you Jeff Tate you got any plugs you got anything coming up you got any

October 7th and 8th I'm at Nut Street Comedy Club in Wilming I'm at Nut Street Comedy Club in Wilmington, North Carolina. Nut Street? Yeah, yeah. We found a winner. I always thought...

I always thought... I always thought Knuckleheads was the worst name, but Nut Street, that's pretty intense. That's the worst name of a street. It's still a weird name

for a comedy club. They could have called it anything, I guess, but they called it Nut Street. It's easy to remember. You guys should go there. Both sides. I guess they're probably not on the second floor, so they couldn't call it Comedy Attic. And you can't call it

Comedy at Ground Level. That's stupid. It's in a basement. Oh, well, then Underground Comedy. Why Nut Street? How about Underground Nuts? Then it sounds like it's improv. That's not right. Alright, Jeff Tate, everybody. One more time, in all

sincerity, I love playing this club and all the comics I know that come here love it and Jared does a good job running this place and is also as you saw tonight a very fiery and exciting competitor thank you so much Jared for all the times we've had here

enjoy your cookie we'll be back Jared Thompson everybody all right and All right. And, uh, oh my God. The, the, the,

uh, shitheads are rather involved, which is interesting. The two different random people have the most involved shitheads. So here we go. As always, midnight snack comedy group. Those fuckers

missed a hell of a show. Is the whole thing that they wrote down. Whoever that was. So I guess I'm supposed to say Midnight Snack Comedy Group is a shithead. And then this one says, Crystal's Vagina thinks Governor Mitch Daniels

is a shithead. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you, cause Doug loves movies