Doug Loves Movies - Graham Elwood, "Mark Wahlberg," Kevin Klein and Ngaio Bealum guest

Episode Date: October 28, 2016

Live from Cobb's Comedy Club in San Francisco, Doug welcomes Graham Elwood, "Mark Wahlberg," Kevin Klein and Ngaio Bealum to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers screening baby sticky seeds With empty as if hot more kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Hey, hey, hey everybody My name is Doug and I love scary movies This is the I love scary movies. This is Doug Loves Scary Movies. Coming to you once again from Cobb's Comedy Club in San Francisco. It's Thursday, October 27th, 2016.

Show me some scary name tags. I'm scared already by this Donnie Darko shit in the front row. You have a sign that says The Shawning, but then you have a gorilla face mask on. Oh shit, there's a stormtrooper it's casual friday for stormtroopers i guess casual thursday it's just got the helmet and then a t-shirt on thanks for being here dude lady next to him just wrote chris on a piece of paper lady next to him just wrote Chris on a piece of paper you never know who's gonna get chosen are there any up in the balcony any scary name tags up there good luck dude the Wizard of Nat and you got like two big signs and one of them has like I think you're guessing those are some of the guests tonight on the show.

Moshe Kasher's not going to be here tonight. Who's that lady? Jesse Klein is in town? Yeah, I didn't know that. Well, good try. Oh, there's a scary Walking

Dead face over there. Yeah, that thing is fucking scary. Stand up and look at everybody and move your head around. It's scary the way it... Seems too real for a flat thing on your face. And then you got a 28 Days Late Taylor. So you kept the whole zombie theme going. And then we've got Jason sitting next to you,

so I wouldn't turn your back on him if I were you. And his hockey mask looking very stoic. What do you write on the top of your hockey mask? Freddy versus Jordan. Freddy versus Jordan. Because your name is Jordan? I'm really getting the hang of this. Holy shit, there's so many name tags. I'm going to do hang of this Holy shit There's so many name tags

I'm gonna do a vine of it No I'll I'll take a picture of you guys When you whip them out again later in the show Thank you very much to everybody for all of your hard work Especially Especially Chris and her Folded up piece of paper

What's the name of the storm trooper now that you're out of your helmet? Sherman? Okay. There's a Deadpool over here, is this gonna stay in costume? Okay, there you go. Ah!

He pulled off the thing and he had another Deadpool thing on! Doug plugs Saturday this Saturday Douglas movies comes to the now here this podcast fest in Anaheim California Disneyland adjacent Minneapolis November 5th back in LA November 7th Sacramento November 12th Portland Oregon November

19th San Diego November 23rd New York City November 27th. Portland, Oregon, November 19th. San Diego, November 23rd. New York City, November 27th. The list goes on and on starting to book dates in 2017. And you can stare at it all by going to douglosmovies.com. douglosmovies.com. The pause is is gonna get longer until there's really no show

it's just all it's just all pause from the dreams dreams can come true department is the new department I developed cause dreams do come true I wish that Mel Gibson was in Tequila Sunrise and he Mel Gibson was in Tequila Sunrise

and he is in fact in Tequila Sunrise. I sat there during Last Man Standing going, I wish he was in that. Turns out he was. He's still in it. It's still a thing, Tequila Sunrise. Let's look at the prize bag you guys. It's

a scary, Douglas scary movie, so of course I had to bring yet another gift bag from the good folks at Ash vs. Evil Dead on the stars Network Sunday nights most I'm quoted somewhere saying it's the most disgusting thing I've seen on television and it's true regular television then I saw yeah stars is like pay cable right so so of course you can have as much violence on there as you want Doug Loves Movies t-shirt aforementioned Ash vs. Evil Dead swag a a hat, a shirt, a little brochure, a booklet if you will, about the show.

And, almost out of these, Phil Bill Volume 1. The Bill Murray comic. Did you guys see the picture on the internet of Bill Murray where he looked like Tom Hanks? That was fun.

I had a good time with that. And I'm going to have a good time with the four guests that are here tonight for Doug Loves Scary Movies. We got four chairs set up so you guys, this is no surprise that there's four people. Please give a big warm welcome

to Ngai Obilum, Graham Elwood, Kevin Kline, and Mark Wahlberg! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It's interesting. We've got two guests that usually sit on the end, so I was wondering if there was going to be a struggle to get that end seat down there.

But let's meet everybody individually, starting with first-time guest Kevin Kline is here, everybody. Thank you, everybody. Kevin Kline is here, everybody. Kevin Kline live weekdays in the mornings here in the Bay Area. Live 105.3. Live 105.3. And suddenly Sean Cullen was speaking through me.

Thanks for having me on your show this morning, Kevin. Anytime, Doug. You're always welcome. Both of them said to me right as we were walking out here, remember there's one rule in Doug Loves Movies, I get the end seat furthest from Doug. They both said it to me as we're walking on. So I get stuck in this weird middle thing right here and then Wahlberg does the move that Wahlberg always does, where he tries to knock you out of the way with his big gong.

And then this guy got the seat at the end in the Cubs jersey. Yeah, go. Oh, yeah. That guy. You guys aren't pro-Cubs, this crowd? You won three goddamn World Series in six years. Shut the fuck up. It's been 108 years since we won.

You can sit down for a fucking year or two, San Francisco. Have a seat and polish up the last goddamn three trophies. Graham Elwood is here, everybody. Hello. Sounds like you haven't had your trophy polished in a long time. It's so neat polishing, Kyle. Oh my God. I think I'm going to do an episode where it's all guests that love to berate

the crowd. Just get you and Chad Daniels and a few others that I can't think of right now. I'm mesmerized by the scream twins in the audience. There's two scream masks sitting next to each other. It's fucking haunting, man.

Those things are fucking scary as shit. Especially when they giggle and they kind of shake. It's weird. That's the last thing you're going to see before you die is them just kind of laughing and then they drink your blood while she wears a Golden State Warriors hoodie. It's kind of laughing, and then they drink your blood while she wears a Golden State Warriors hoodie. It's kind of hot, actually.

It looks like they're just about to give really scary blowjobs. Look at them. Yeah, polish that trophy. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. Cubs 1908. Insert really weird-shaped dick here. Well, Doug, that's why you have me on the show.

Here comes a weird dick. Oh, weird dick in the house. ComedyFilmNerds.com for Graham. If you want some comedy weird dick. And M'Gayo Belem is here, everybody. Oh, hello, everyone. Smoke weed, everybody. Thank you for having me over, Doug.

Thank you, Gene. Can you list off all the states that have marijuana on the ballot? California. Medical or recreational or all of them? Either or. Montana, California, Arizona, Maine, Vermont, Massachusetts, Florida. I think that's it. That might be it.

That might be it. Colorado has a social club. Did you say Arkansas? No, Washington already has legal weed. Yeah, D.C. already has. Arkansas's got a medical thing on the ballot, too. Yeah. And I think North Dakota does, too.

That's pretty good. Support weed, everybody. Yes on 64. Yes on 64. Listen to my new podcast on CannabisRadio.com. It's called Rollin' with Ungayo.

And appearing five out of the last six shows. Jesus. Kind of slow in Hollywood these days. No, maybe four out of the last six.

It's Mark Wahlberg! How you guys doing? You doing good? What's up, dog? So, apologies to you, dude. You were right in Tacomaoma it is forces of nature not force of nature as i insisted that's okay my lifeline that up uh yeah your lifeline wasn't much help but uh she should have argued with you

but i was like you know what it's fine katie just stay home I argued with you, but I was like, you know what? It's fine, Katie. Just stay home. What brings you to San Francisco? Well, I left my house this morning, and I said, you know what?

I'm going to jog north today. I got here, it started raining, grabbed a protein shake, and then you hit me up. I was like, let's do this shit. So you're welcome. Oh, no, people want to know where Donnie is. I'm sure he's somewhere next to a broken RV. Okay.

Graham, I know you're super busy with all your sports. And- And balls. Do you have a movie you can recommend or something that you've seen recently? Ooh. Or just tell us the last movie you saw, love it or hate it. Captain Fantastic, love it.

Oh, that's a really good movie. Yeah, so are these four people. They love it too. Yeah, it's a small movie out there, Viggo Mortensen, and really interesting storyline and well well done good kid the kids are good in it Franklin jell is always a good bad guy you know it's good business yeah he's a real dick in that movie such a cock he's worse than Nixon in that movie he took his Nixon performance up a notch so from now on he's just always

Nixon no matter what his agents are like you got to play a father-in-law as long He took his Nixon performance up a notch. So from now on, he's just always Nixon, no matter what his agents are like. You gotta play the father-in-law, as long as I'm Nixon. I wanna be, you can't marry my daughter. Those kids need a real education. What about you, Mark? Are you into the movies?

Yeah, I'm in them. Oh, so you've seen Deepwater Horizon a few times? Fuck yeah, dude. It's my fucking alarm clock. The last movie I saw, you know what? I saw that fucking Christmas movie

the night before. Oh, Seth Rogen? Yeah, they had that on the g6 and I was like why the fuck doesn't this little looper fucker go back and save his parents this whole movie would end real fucking quick oh yeah what's what's his Joseph Gordon Levitt I don't the kid from third rock time or whatever the it's called third rock from the sun no he's the kid from the lookout now you've lost me i don't know it was pretty good he did that fat guy with a beard in it and a black guy and i was like this is great that's all you really need that that's what they said and so the whole movie's not trying to get into a

party i'm like is this what normal people's movie's them trying to get into a fucking party. I'm like, is this what normal people's life's like? Trying to get into a fucking party? Yeah, when you are the party, it's a whole different thing. Fucking A, dude. Kevin? Same question. I know it's Doug Loves Movies, but there's a great TV show with Donnie Wahlberg called...

That's a lie. No, it's true. Is it called That's a Lie. No, it's true. Is it called That's a Lie? No, the TV show where he plays a detective. It's called Intervention? No. He's a cop. About a guy who collects all his hopes and dreams.

It's called Hoarders. He's a convincing officer of the law and he's great at it. It's a great show. Oh, NYPD moved the fuck out of my house? No. Not that. Is it about a guy that goes to a convenience store to try and look

fancy, and it's called Suits? Because he does that every fucking Tuesday. Well, it's a great show. You should DVR it or something. Yeah. I saw the train lady, Doug, the lady on the train. Oh, the girl on the train. The lady on the train. Oh, the girl on the train. The girl on the train. Well, it was a long

movie. I was waiting the whole time for a girl to show up. It was a grown-ass woman. Yeah, it was a grown-ass woman the whole time. I thought it was going to be like Benjamin Buns where she gets younger as the train went on. I fell asleep during that movie, and I don't want to give anything away, but she was crazy for You saw it, right? I saw

it today, in fact. Okay, so she's crazy for the whole movie, and then something happens, and then she ends it by being crazy again. But I slept through the part where something happened, so as far as I was concerned, it was just a three-hour documentary of a crazy woman. Something else happened that's very important, but I won't give that away.

Well, you found out later? Yeah. Yeah, my wife told me. My wife! Yeah. Applauding that is ridiculous it's my sarah silver impression you're being ridiculous yes what was the last movie you saw jack reacher never go back oh and yeah all right okay the voice went up voice went up. I'll give it an all right. It's not bad. It's okay.

He's 60 years old. He did a pretty good action movie thing. Colby Smulders was great. Okay. I was off by. Colby Smulders. And they did bring back Robert Duvall from the previous film. His one friend in the previous film doesn't even show up in the sequel.

Jack Reacher has no friends. That's right. He's the Kwai Chang Kane of white people. But you think when you have one friend as Robert Duvall,

you'd ask him to show up. He would do a little tango for you. Right. He gives you some preaching. Yeah. But no, not in this one.

All right. All right. He could tell you all about his long lost African-American brother. Did he knock anybody out and go, you just got Richard?

Wow. I think you reached it about as far as possible for that joke. I've been wanting to do that joke since I saw the movie poster. You should give people

a Reacher though, like if you're fortunate enough to be in that position. Oh, my joke sucked. Okay. though like if you're fortunate enough to be in that position oh my joke sucked okay never look back oh no wait i had kind of look back at it really i had a different problem with the girl on the train when i watched it today is i i tried to go to sleep and uh and i couldn't i couldn't make it happen no I really did get a little dozy

during a couple parts of it. I wake myself up as soon as... That kind of same thing when you're driving a car. That's the best. Because I really wanted to stay with it because I didn't want to miss... I knew it was a twisty movie and I knew that missing a twist would be bad

and so I was pretty much up through the whole thing and it was a little too slowly paced for my taste. If you want to see crazy shit, just ride a real train and watch people. You'll see all sorts of cool stabbings, everything. I recommend the 14 Mission.

Yeah. I'm a big fan of that bus. Take it all the way. Take it all the way. Start at the Embarcadero. Fuck the cable car. 225, dog. Take that shit all the way to Daly City.

And get the ride of your life. Get the ride of your life. You'll see the whole town. You'll see the whole world. I'm serious. You can hear all about it on my new podcast, Rolling With the Bio, CannabisRadio.com.

Thank you. All right, so one more question before we move on to the games portion. Because it is Doug Loves Scary Movies tonight here at Cobbs, a tradition that skipped a year, Graham, what is either your favorite scary movie or one that you would recommend?

I'd say maybe the original Amityville Horror. Ooh, that's a good one. Who's in that, James Brolin? Yeah. I think so. Yeah, and Miss Margo, was one of the Margo, Margo Kidder? Kidder? Margo Kidder, maybe. That was a long time ago.

1977? 75? Yeah. 78, maybe? Somewhere in there. The kids were Drew Barrymore and Ryan Gosling.

That's not accurate. That's a fun game is I'll say things that are wrong on purpose throughout the show and I'll see if any people try to contact the corrections department.

That's my new excuse for getting things wrong. The kids were Red Fox. I did it on purpose to trick everybody. Children were played by Freddie Prinze and Red Fox.

I try to be slightly plausible with mine, but... Why? That's cool. Why big? That's cool. Okay, Amityville. We've got to vote for Amityville Horror. Mark, what's a horror movie that you enjoy? Dude, it's so fucking good. What Lies Beneath.

Just an old Harrison Ford that you think is the ghost for half the fucking movie and Michelle Pfeiffer's got green fucking eyes and you're like what happened to her eyes I don't know is she the ghost watch it that's better than the trailer

that really got me I saw that movie and now I'm not sure I did I'm so intrigued by that description. It's a great way to watch that movie, I think. Thanks. It's really fucking good. It's kind of unusual for you to recommend something that you weren't involved in.

Wasn't I? You had something to do with What Lies Beneath? Maybe I play the water. Who fucking knows? You're all wet for sure Kevin anything that starts Tyler Perry presents sorry question was for a second you're saying all those movies are terrifying. Scary. Very scary. People laugh. They line up. I can't figure it out. You need Jesus. That's why. Dracula. Dead and loving it. Underrated.

Scary movie. Right, Doug? Leslie Nielsen? That's right. Yeah. Leslie Nielsen. And I think he young Sofia Vergara was in that. Dracula's like, are you thirsty? And she's like, I want a Pepsi.

At a young age, she knew she wanted Pepsi. That's amazing. Oh yeah, yeah. It wasn't an endorsement thing yet. Oh, she just she wanted Pepsi. That's amazing. Oh, yeah, yeah. It wasn't an endorsement thing yet. She just saw her whole life. She craved Pepsi. That's my favorite drink. I would love to see her sit in with suicidal tendencies.

That's fine. There's a few people. No, no, no, no, no, no. Those who know, they know. What do you got for us, scary movie-wise? Me? Yeah. I like Cabin in the Woods a lot.

Yes. If you want to go old school, how about The Howling? The Howling. The Howling. It's a werewolf story. With Dee Wallace, then Stone. That's right. Eventually back to just Dee Wallace.

Correct. Had to deal with a rabid dog. The career of D. Wallace. After these messages. Oh, dude, Doug, can I change mine? Yeah, you can. Fuck yeah. You know what I just remembered that I really fucking liked

and doesn't have Harrison Ford? This is going to be one of yours, isn't it? No, those are all fucking beautiful films. The Witch. I fucking love that movie. That was good. Yeah, too. The one that just came out? This is going to be one of yours, isn't it? No, those are all fucking beautiful films. The Witch. I fucking love that movie. That was good. Yeah, it's a good movie. The one that just came out?

Oh my God, that's the most badass goat in the history of fucking movies, dude. It's like fucking Thanksgiving in hell. It's Thanksgiving in hell. AKA Thanksgiving with Donnie. It's really fucking scary, dude. Have you seen it? The Witch? It's really fucking scary dude Have you seen it? I don't know if it's really scary No it's fucking scary dude

It's suspenseful and full of drag Just like to live in a time Where nobody knows who you are Like oh fuck that Rap doesn't exist Like how do you break out? Right You can't do provocative underwear ads.

Yeah, there's no underwear models. No. Even if you are, like, nobody's taking pictures. You know how long that would fucking take? Who was the guy in The Sixth Sense? Because he was good. Not the dead kid. There was another guy in that movie.

Bruce Willis? No, another guy. You're talking about Haley Jo? No, he was really talented. Oh, you're talking about Donnie Wahlberg. Yeah, that's right. Oh, whatever. Oh, yeah, clap it up.

Donnie didn't eat for three weeks and cried, and you fucking people think he did a great job. He was unrecognizable. I mean, I wouldn't have known what he looked like before he lost the weight. Yeah, but you want to know what something else is the secret? Every day, Donnie is unrecognizable. All right, well, let's...

Does he listen to the podcast? Does he hear this? Yeah, like I bought him a fucking Zoom. There's other ways. That's the only way to hear a podcast? That's the closest thing to what Donnie deserves is a fucking Zoom. I told him today, I was like,

Donnie, you should get on Vine. You'll go places on Vine. He's like, really? I'm like, yeah, Vine's a big deal. He spent all fucking day trying to download the app. He doesn't know. It's dead. How does that work? Is Vine just going to stop?

Like, it's just going to disappear from our phones? Or can we still look at old Vines? I think it'll be like going to your MySpace. Let me give that a try. Look up your old FriendStory account and see what happens. MySpace is still out there, dude. It's just a collection of, like, glitter and Perfect Circle songs. Top 8s. Top 8s? Top 8s.

Top eights? Top eights. Little known fact. I'm in more top eights than any other fucking person ever. More than Dane Cook? Who? Dane Cook crushed fucking Myspace. You gotta give respect.

Respect is due. Yo, you said Dane Cook? Dane Cook. Oh, I thought you said Dan Cook. Who the fuck's Dan Cook? That's, all right, so. Never heard of that guy.

It's time for Bert to turn the show off because I'm going to say, let the games begin! Take control. Bring your name tags out of the shadows! If we could get some house lights, and I'm going to make one last vine, and while my guests pick their name tags, we'll do this brief commercial message.

We'll be right back. Today's episode is brought to you in part by HelloFresh. At HelloFresh, we want to change the way people eat forever. We believe everyone deserves honest, natural, delicious, healthy food. We celebrate fresh ingredients and making magic in the kitchen. We know there's a chef in everyone. We think food brings people together. Good food allows us to live long and great food lets us enjoy every bite of life. We are learning and growing every day. We never give up and we strive to make people happy. That's why we started the HelloFresh movement. Whether you're a busy professional couple, a large family that runs at a breakneck pace,

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when you subscribe. HelloFresh. We're back. Who are you playing for, Graham Elwood? Diana Hard. She just had a Santa hat with a light thing on it, so that I was attracted to light. And she wrote this, almost looks like a murder shirt. So I was attracted to that, like some sort of crazy Santaanta killer diana hard now i have a name tag ho ho ho yeah so if i win she's gonna kill again

i hope she pushes uh hans gruber out of Nakatomi Plaza. You get it. Oh, some donuts just hit the stage. Mark, who are you playing for? Dude, they went all out on the fucking glitter. But it was the bedazzled Freddy Krueger that fucking did it. Nightmare on Kell Street.

I like that the T's are upside down crosses. Oh, fuck yeah. You know what? This is sacrilegious. Fuck you. Oh, you're gonna pick a new take? No, I'll keep it. Okay. That's wrong, though.

Who are you playing for, Kevin? Well, upon closer examination, I'm playing for a gay ISIS bomb maker. This is Jenica, Jenica Jones in the Temple of Doug. Oh. Hi. There's snacks on this name card in case we get hungry. So that's great.

Yeah. It's a very creative name tag. Now, Ngaio fell for the old double name tag trick. Right? Where she has two giant signs. One says the Wizard of Nat and then the other one has,

oh, that's why you picked that because you're on there? I'm Dorothy. You're Dorothy. Moshe Kasher is the Scarecrow.

Scarecrow. And the Tin Man is just a half smiley face. And Mark Wahlberg is the lion. The Cowardly Lion. That's his name.

That's the name of the character. That's the name of the character. And if you remember correctly, that motherfucker was ready to fight the moment you see him in the movie. He brings that shit. He's a badass. Let me at him.

Let me at him. Fuck yeah dude I just We're just gonna sit here Not With three boxes of donuts And not throw them at people I don't want

I mean Well here's the thing Is It's now A time permitting situation Where At the end of the show If we've got a minute,

which, you know, everybody's got a minute, then we're going to fucking start throwing those things. Fucking chuck it, donuts. Like it's nobody's, yeah. I feel like I'm going to find a minute. We need a donut gun,

like a t-shirt gun, so we can reach into the back. I'm sure there's people in the back. I brought two. Oh, look at him go. A lot of people think two guns is about him and Denzel Washington, but it's just about Mark's arms.

Fuckin' A, dude. That's what I always thought. Do people say otherwise? Not here, no. Fuckin' A, they don't. Not now, not here. Let's play some games. What'd you guys, uh, did we talk about the prize bag i'll line upstairs oh shit well you want to go grab it we'll start with graham on the other one there graham what'd you bring well doug i just came back from the comedy cluj film festival

where i was showing earbuds so i have a cluj romania tote. Yep, everybody's a big fan of Romania. Yeah, people are going nuts for it. And inside is a program from the Cluj Film Festival. And then I also brought a copy of The Comedy Film Nerd Guide to Movies. And your bookmark? Five Romanian leg, folks. Whoa!

Valued at over $1.10. So that's your credit. That's your credit deal. All right. Thanks a lot. Pass that stuff down while Mark tells us about what he brought.

I'm going to change somebody's fucking life tonight. Well, maybe we should have you go last then. Did you bring Jesus? Well, it's probably already happened, because they looked at me. But I'll go whichever order you want, Doug.

Let's see what Kevin brought. All right, this is great if you're a fan of music or weed. Hello. I got a record. This is Dr. Rhythm. It's a Dr. Rhythm album. It was signed, but it got rained on on the way here.

So it just kind of says Dr. Rhythm. But I'm not sure where Dr. Rhythm went to medical school, but he looks legit. Who's Funkin' You was probably a great track. Yeah, I think the whole album's pretty good from what I've heard. And I know you guys like to read about weed. Here is Jesse Ventura's

new book, Marijuana Manifesto. Woo! Pass that down. Henry Rollins said of this book, not interested. No. He said, it's a good book. I didn't read it, so I'm giving it away.

There you have it. Oh, and I'll throw in some international money. I didn't realize that was the theme tonight. Hold on. One bohemian dollar. From the Bahamas. Bohemian dollar. Bohemian dollar.

Bohemian. This is worthian dollar. Bohemian. This is worth like 5,000 times that Romanian shit. It's a Bohemian dollar. Even though I'm inclined to believe the federal government filed Patent 507 to control the American people's access to CBDs, I do have to say I was surprised to see the federal government side with Colorado to uphold its state...

You sound just like him. Thank you. That was fucking good, Doc. That was my impression of James Andomian's impression of Jesse Ventura. I don't know how he does it. It's kind of like getting high,

how I feel right now. Although I did get high before we came out here. Mungaya, what do you got? I have a t-shirt that says legalized crime with a big picture of a pot leaf on it. Get it? And then I have a download

sticker from my CD, Weed and Sex. Woo! And then if you don't win it, you can always buy one of them from me after the show. They're only $5. I'll be standing right there before you get in your Uber. You can buy one.

My rent's due Tuesday. I have two children. One of them goes to Sarah Lawrence. Please buy my fucking CD. Please. School's fucking expensive. Can we grab that plastic bag for me to chuck all this stuff into?

There you go. Well done. It was like a ghost. It looked like a ghost. Thank you. Thanks, Mark. Good idea. So, listener at home, I just fucking saved a life.

Last night, Mark Wahlberg saved my life. So, the winner today is going home with three bags. It's a triple bagger. All right. And the first game we're going to play to determine... And I'll throw in a nickel bag. When I said save it for last, I meant at the end of the show, after I'm gone. Mark, what'd you bring?

Well, two things. Mark, what'd you bring? Well Two things One you can buy One you can't Sounds like a monologue from a movie, doesn't it? No, that's just me talking I'm that fucking good Somebody who wins today Is going to be able to the rest of their life

Say Mark Wahlberg gave me fucking flowers The other thing they're going to be able the rest of their life to say Mark Wahlberg gave me fucking flowers. The other thing they're going to be able to say is after the show, Mark Wahlberg called one person on my phone and told them

to go fuck themselves. And, and, if you are married to a guy or a girl, I'll sign their tit. That is very nice. You're welcome, America.

I think you could skip the flowers and just do the go-fuck-yourself phone call. That's a pretty great prize. Well, let's see if anybody wins. We're all winners. No, somebody is going to win. Well, we'll see if anybody wins or not. Yeah, there'll be a winner, and then you'll have to...

Maybe somebody will win. Maybe somebody won't win. We'll see what happens. No, one of the four people on the stage is going to win. Who knows? Let's find out. And the person you're playing for... Is there going to be a winner?

Everybody's in suspense. Are you going to... If you don't win, are you gonna contest the election? I was just gonna say that. Are you gonna not acknowledge whoever the official winner is? You know what? We'll find out when we see if there's a winner.

Are you gonna get some of your Second Amendment friends to challenge whoever wins? I'm not saying I'm gonna grab a pussy over it. I'm just saying we'll find out if there's a winner or not. Who knows what'll fucking happen? Pussy grabs you, Mark, right? In Russia.

I'm gonna tell you this right now. When it comes to pussy, I don't have to do any grabbing. I ask politely. If they consent, we have a good time. If they don't, that's their right. Respect the fucking person. If they don't, that's their right. Respect a fucking person.

They always consent with you, don't they? Yes. All right, so the first game we're going to play tonight is Donnie. That's true. If you want anything to stop, just say Donnie. That goes for every area of your life. In that case, Donnie. The first game we're going to play tonight is called Live, Die, Repeat.

I'm going to say the title of a film, and the first one of you who can repeat it back correctly is the winner. That'll be able to see all your faces. Oh, someone thinks you've got this, Mark. Maybe I'll let somebody win. Who knows? you've got this mark maybe i'll let somebody win who knows a nightmare on elm street All right. I don't know if you can say it as I go along. Do we have to wait for you to finish?

Well, you got to know what the whole thing is. So let me, I'll do a shorter one. A Nightmare on Elm Street. Not just by three words. Any more pre-guesses? Roots Oh that's TV Roots? It is scary though

Alright here we go Dr. Giggles Dr. Giggles I'm gonna be honest I don't know It was close It was close Let's try another one

Do you guys listen Or do you look at his lips? I'm not telling you My secrets man You know what? I know your fucking secrets Now you have to live With them too

Damn it Damn it all Scream Scream You have to live with them too. Damn it. Damn it all. Scream. Scream. Scream. Scream too. Scream too. Why don't we play a fair game?

Here's another one. Halloween H2O. Halloween H2O! Halloween H2O! Alright, let's just call Mark the winner of this because... Fucking A. You're welcome, Cal.

Because he was robbed of the Tacoma win. And so now I feel everything's fair and square. So it's like a makeup call in the NBA? I think yes. Okay. Trust me, it is. I think it's just like that, yeah. Doug loves a good sports analogy.

Really quick, can I get a Jack and Coke? You can just put the Coke on a mirror. That'd be great. Who's ever listening out there? You know what? A long fingernail. I don't care. Just bring it up.

Does anybody else need anything? No? I'm good. Yeah, I'm squared away. All right, cool. Scrim 2. Sure. This is a game called Last Mash Stanton.

Yeah. Uh-oh, it's right. What are these? I'm going to mash up two actors' names. right what are these I'm gonna mash up two actors names and then you guys are gonna take turns naming movies of either one of those actors or both if there is crossover I do not believe there is in this instance and we're gonna start with Start with Mark, and then we'll go to Graham, Mugayo, and Kevin, in that order. You got one lifeline, and it's the person whose name tag you chose. Hi.

Thank you very much. Give your waitstaff a round of applause, everybody. Yay! Take care of these people. Take care of these people. And you can get some money. But also save yourself $5 so that you can buy my CD. I'm not kidding.

Tip everything except for $5. Exactly. Unless that's your last $5 and give it to the waitress. Here's the name. Here's the mashed up name up to horror film Giants if you ask me Linda Blair a Drake so the films of Linda Blair or Larry Drake? The Exorcist.

Mark Wahlberg says The Exorcist. Graham? The Exorcist 2. Cal, I'm going to tell you right now. Turn your brightness way down and get that fucking phone out. It's cheating, man. Is there more to that title, Graham? Yeah, but I mean...

We're going to get all tangled up in that kind of shit? What's the full title of exorcist two exorcist two colon let's all say it together that's a great idea i want to use that that's not how you can't you guys go on three i'll go on four that's not Yep, we got it So Score one for Graham I guess we're moving on I'm right, there's more to it, right? Yeah

Alright, so you're out No, no, it's The Exorcist 2, Curly's Revenge Is that real? It was a search for Curly's gold Right, but he was also, this is Jack Palance, as I pronounce it, was also in The Exorcist 2, little known story, as that Curly character.

It was a reference. So it was Curly's revenge. This is a little known fact. I think your hat's on fire. If you guys don't like movie trivia, I mean, whatever. It's just... Udayu, this is going to be over fast. Don't

you worry, Graham. I'm fucking out, dog. I have no idea who the fuck... Linda Blair from The Exorcist? Yeah, she was in The Exorcist. And then she was in a weird cop parody film where she played Sue Perman. And that's all I know, but I can't remember the name of the film. And you don't know the great Larry Drake?

Nope. Grandfather of the current pop sensation Drake? Dude, is that true? Is that fucking true, dude? All right,

Kevin, what do you got? Linda Blair Witch Project. See, he had fun with it, you guys. Didn't have an answer, but he had fun. Can I say how much I love that no one used their fucking lifelines? Well, we could do that.

We can do another round with lifelines. Do you have another one, Mark? Yep. Kel, what do you got? I like it. The lifelines are gonna decide it What? She says American Pie 2

For Larry Drake American Pie Full title American Pie 2 Curly's Revenge That's not true So Mark is that what you're going with? Cal is that what we're fucking going with?

That's what she. So Mark, is that what you're going with? Cal, is that what we're fucking going with? That's what she said. That's what she said. American Pie 2. It's the only time that's been used appropriately in the history of your fucking lives. When you're referring to a woman having just said something, that's what she said.

American Pie 2 is correct. Way to go, Cal. He said. American Pie 2 is correct. How about Cal? Graham, who's your lifeline? Diana. What do you got, Dirty D? Dirty D. Dirty D. Heart.

Repossessed. You want to go with repossessed? I do want Linda Blair, repossessed. Repossessed. Do you want to go with repossessed? I do want to go with repossessed. That is correct. Repossessed. Linda Blair, repossessed. Gaio's lifeline is gnat.

She's got gnat. That's why we're such a good team. Do it together. Pet Cemetery. No. Damn it. Either one of them would have been great in that, though. Kevin's lifeline is?

Gay Isis. No, what's her name? Her name is Janika. Janika. Janika. Janika. I thought she was black. It's very dark out there, Doug. I said Janika.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Ha, ha. Woo. Yes, Janika, yes. For the listener at home, the audience can't decide how they feel right now. Janika's saying what?

Dark man? I'll accept that. Larry Drake, yeah. Dark Man. From Dark Man, that's correct. Yeah. Now you're back out on your own. Mark, you got another one?

L.A. Law, the movie. Okay, so you're out. Technically, I'm the only person who's in. Graham, do you have any more Curly's, Curly Sue, Curly's Curly Revenge? Curly Sue. Linda Blair was also in. Uh-huh. any more Curlies, Curly Sue, Curlies, Curly Revenge? Curly Sue. Linda Blair. Uh-huh.

Was also in. Uh-huh. Nerds 3. Nerds? Just nerds? I don't even remember Nerds 1 or Nerds 2. Nerds Part 3. Revenge of the Nerds 3. Oh, okay.

Colon. nerds part three oh okay colon spring break with curly oh I'd love to see that Kevin do you have another one the leprechaun no that seems like something Linda Blair could have done alright so that means Mark Wahlberg The Leprechaun. No. That seems like something Linda Blair could have done.

Alright, so that means Mark Wahlberg is the winner of that game. Is Larry Drake in Terminator? What? Was he in Terminator 2? Larry Drake played Dr. Giggles. The aforementioned Dr. Giggles. He was in one of the Bean movies called Bean. He was in a of the Bean movies called Bean.

He was in a movie called Spun. And he was in the original Karate Kid. What? As like a thug. He's like had a very small part in that. And Linda Blair, of course, was in not only The Exorcist, but Airport 75, Roller Boogie, Exorcist II, The Heretic. That's what I said. And Hell Knight

Among others Those are just a brief sampling of both of their film careers But I like that Playing with an insanely hard Pair of names I thought that was fun I'll hear all about your thoughts on Twitter And now let's play

Whose tagline is it anyway? Oh shit And now let's play Whose Tagline Is It Anyway? Oh, shit. Er, er, er. Thought there was gonna be more to that. Oh, shit, Nat's out. Oh, boy, Nat just is like, this is bullshit. It's rigged.

Yeah. I'll say a classic or not so classic downright what the fuck tagline from a motion picture. Something from the poster, the trailer. You know.

Something that came out with the movie. And you just get one guess. Tell me what movie you think it is. One at a time. We'll start with Mark, then we'll turn this fucker around, and we'll go to Kevin and Gaio and Graham. Mark Wahlberg. Yes.

What movie has the tagline, In space, no one can eat ice cream. Space Pulse. Incorrect. Fuck. Kevin. Kevin Kline. The Martian.

No. M'Gayo B'Lim. In space, no one can eat ice cream? Mm-hmm. They're more emphatic about it. They don't use a question mark at the end. Well, I question everything. Curly's Revenge.

See, you're thinking it over. Full title. Colon. Curly's Revenge of Curly's Colon. Graham? Elwood that is earnest goes to space the correct answer killer clowns from outer space classic killer clowns clowns are back in the news of course yeah whoa whoa easy sir guy excited about clowns. Clowns are back in the news, of course. Whoa, whoa, easy, sir.

There's a guy excited about clowns over there. How do you spell it, sir, with a C or a K? Whoop, whoop. Okay. Mark, what movie has the tagline, A Masterpiece of Modern Terror? A fucking masterpiece. The tagline. A masterpiece of modern terror. A fucking masterpiece. They don't get cutesy with it. Just a masterpiece of modern terror.

Ghostbusters 2? KK? Fuck. Madea's Christmas. Tyler Perry presents Madea's Christmas. Tyler Perry Presents, Madea's Christmas. I love an accurate insult. A masterpiece of modern terror. Don't... I don't know what I just said.

What's happening? What are you saying I mean why are you talking she's I think she's trying to say what you're a woman well in that case, we yield the floor. Sorry. What does that mean? What does that mean? She's probably just saying, stop being rude to me. I have something to say. I can interrupt. She wanted him to use a lifeline, is what she was trying to say. Which you never said we could fucking do. There's no lifelines in this game.

The thing. John Carpenter's the Thing? Sure, why not? No. Graham? Tell me the line again, please. Use it in a sentence. The line is, what movie

has the tagline, I'm a woman? She sounds like a nasty woman. Two, thanks for everything, Julie Newmar. Mrs. Doubtfire. It's a masterpiece of modern terror. Not horror, terror. Masterpiece of modern terror. Hellraiser.

What? Hellraiser. No. Real answer. That's what they went with to sell a motion picture called The Shining. Full time. Yeah, they were super cocky about it. I remember not liking it at the time. And I loved the Stephen King book,

and I wrote a letter to Stephen King saying that I thought Stanley Kubrick fucked up his book. And he wrote back, yeah, I don't like it either, but it's an adaptation, and he can do whatever he wants. Thank you for your time, Douglas.

You wrote me a really nice, polite letter back. How old were you at the time? I was 37. Shut up. Guy in the audience beat me, too. He said, 40. Just last week, I fucking wrote this letter. Fired off a hot email.

It's weird. The creepiest thing Stephen King has ever written was the handwritten letter to Douglas. But I saw somebody tweeted a response from him that had a very similar look to it. Not that I ever thought it was fake, but it's nice to know that he was... I believe he wrote you, dude.

He did that. I met him a few times, and he's a class fucking act. I don't think you've ever been in an adaptation of one of his books. No, we were talking about a few things. Oh, okay. I heard you were up to play Cujo. Different ending if I had been that fucking dog.

Mark Wahlberg had played the dog. It could be any movie where the dog dies. It would have made it through to the end. Fuck yeah, dude. If I had played the dog It could be any movie where the dog dies It would have made it through to the end Fuck yeah dude If I had played that dog I would have just used my hand To open the fucking door and said let's do this bitch It's pretty funny when a dog calls someone bitch More appropriate really It's got a fun double meaning

I'm always punching up the script dude Mark what movie had the tagline Don't let it in? Don't let it in. Trump's hand. Did they make a documentary about Donnie? Don't let it in. Okay, I'm just going to give you a heads up.

None of these are documentaries. This is a great documentary, but how are we gonna sell it? What's the tagline gonna be? Don't let it in. Don't let it in. The mist. That's a good... You shouldn't let the mist in. Kevin, do you have any idea? Strangers.

Do you mean like more like a life rule? Yeah. In general, a little life lesson? Heads up, guys, don't let in strangers. Look both ways before you cross the street tonight after the show. Wait, you mean that movie called The Strangers? That's what I meant. No. But also in life, I mean that movie called The Strangers? That's what I meant. No.

But also in life, I mean. Yeah. So learn something from this. N'Gayo? Don't let it in. Yeah. Don't let it in, you said. Mm-hmm. Rumpelstiltskin.

Wait, is it Boogie Nights? Uh... Rumpelstiltskin. Wait. Is it Boogie Nights? Graham? Take that as a yes. The Fog. You guys, you renamed all things that you should never let in when they're trying to get into your home.

But the answer is a rather recent movie that people love a great deal, as I understand it. The Babadook. The Babadook. I didn't see that one. The Fog. There you go. Alright, Mark. Alright. I'm going to give you a softball. You ready for it?

Mark was apparently right. No one is going to win. Oh, someone will win. We'll see. A winner will be chosen. We'll find out later. I will decide. Who knows what will happen. Mark, what movie was advertised as

scarier than The Exorcist? Exorcist 2. Oh. Scarier than The Exorcist. Exorcist 2. Scarier than the Exorcist. Scarier than the Exorcist? Scarier than the Exorcist. Exorcist 2, The Heretic. I'm going to go for it.

It just feels like you'd fuck with me In some way Kevin Damn it I think Kevin's gonna get this I know what the movie is It's the one with the cameras And the place

Moves around a lot Paranoia Paranoid Paranormal What's that? Paranormal Paranormal. Paranormal activity.

Activia. Activia. The yogurt. Paranormal activity. Which part? One, two, three, four. First one. No. N'Gaya.

Second one. No. I was going to say Rosemary's Baby, but I was wrong. Demon Seed? Graham. Damn it. Blair Witch Project. That is correct. Way to go, dude.

Way to fucking go. Walk it off. Walk that shit off, dude. Walk that shit off. Are you just going home now? Because you can't... Look at that, guys. Don't step on the donuts. Don't step on the donuts. For the audience at home,

Graham got to feel like I do every day. Way to go, dude. You fucking crushed that shit. That was a tough one. What was it? Blair Witch Project. The answer was Blair Witch Project. Which had come up earlier, so I thought

somebody might guess it again. And that somebody was Graham. Maybe there will be a winner. I don't know. We'll find out. Maybe. Graham gets to start this next round. Aw, shit. We'll flip the order around. It's coming at you, Mark.

Graham? Yeah? Yeah? Or was it already going that way? I thought it was the other way. It doesn't matter. Is Deadpool currently your assistant on this fucking show? He's right,

though. Oh, cool. So, N'Gayo, you're next. Okay, I'm ready. Graham. Yes. five friends go into a cabin in the woods but bad things happen let me i that up bad bad friends hang on hang on happening for hang on i can do this what's this game five friends go into a cabin in the woods. Bad things happen. Are we still

playing the same game? I thought it was like some weird title mashup thing. Hey, Graham, I just want to tell a quick story. Okay. Five friends went into a cabin in the woods and bad things happened.

Bad things happened. Cabin in the woods? That's correct. Take another fucking lap, dude. Take a lap. Fuck yeah, dude. Fuck yeah. From this side of the home, grandma's doing dips.

Graham, you're needed back on the stage. Graham Elwood to the stage. White. You leave one high five per person. We don't have time for everyone to get one. Don't touch the top of that man's head so much. Wow.

For luck, apparently. Damn it. While we're waiting for Graham, I have to point out that in the audience for Doug Lowe's Scary Movies, in the greatest fucking sex matchup of all time,

there's a girl dressed as Cinderella and a guy dressed as Opie from Sons of Anarchy. You guys could make the most violent, beautiful porn of all time. Oh, shit. We're all with you.

Oh, shit. Too bad Vine's done, huh? Takes me more than six seconds. I gotta say, I rubbed Deadpool's head. It was smooth like it was the most amazing thing I've ever felt in my life. Like a stone that had been sitting on the shady side. Donnie, Donnie, Donnie.

Respect the game, dude. Respect it. I'm so glad this show finally has a safe word. Oh. Dude, respect it. I'm so glad this show finally has a safe word. Graham? Yeah? What movie has the... You're on a roll, buddy. All right. What movie has the tagline,

Make Your Last Breath Count? The Deep. The deep. Good try. This time we already switched the order. Mark. The abyss. No. Kevin.

Lifeline. Ungayo. Make your last breath count? Yeah. Oh, fuck. Poseidon Adventure. Oh, fuck. No.

It's Scream. The mask is sitting right there in front of you. All right, one more, and you all just guess until somebody gets it, because Graham is the winner of that game officially. But I want to do this last one. The ultimate in alien terror. Alien?

No. Aliens. No. Alien versus Predator. No. Oh, there's no order anymore? No. Shit.

Friday the 13th, Jason in Space. No. Supertroopers. No. Gravity. Curly's Revenge. No. No. Deadpool's Scalp. Born in East LA. No. Alien vs. Predator. No. Blood In Blood Out. Three men and a baby. No.

What was the slogan again? Bowfinger. I love that movie. The ultimate in alien terror. Bowfinger. Independence Day. No. Fuck. That's the ultimate?

Oh, fuck. According to them. Will Smith just punches it in the face. True. Predator. Face area. It just came up earlier, so I wanted to mention it. It's from John Carpenter's The Thing.

Oh, good movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, you guys, we're going to try to play. Oh, yeah, we got time. Oh, this is great. This is great. Nobody has to work tomorrow, right? Really?

Why does everybody get Friday off? They don't. I think we just have a super unemployed crowd tonight. Oh, nice. Woo-hoo. Everybody just got laid off. Oh, nice. Woo-hoo! Everybody just got laid off from Twitter, apparently. They all came to the show. Don't owe me.

Fucking move back to Ohio. I don't give a fuck. Too close to home. Take your $6 toast with you. Did you just say $6 toast? You say $6 toast? You fucking heard me, and that's cheap. Who would pay that much for carbs? All right, the last game we're going to play tonight

and determine who gets all the prizes is a little number called Jason and Deb's IMDb Game. a little number called Jason and Deb's IMDb game. I'll start naming movies from somebody's top four on IMDb. And you guys can jump in and guess who you think it is. But if you jump in early and guess wrong, you get a negative one point. Graham gets one point for having won the last game. So he's got a leg up.

First to the most points after six rounds. Plus maybe a tiebreaker. No more fucking around, Jenica. I got you here. Let's do it. Yeah, Jenica doesn't get to help you, though. Come on, gay ISIS.

I do not know how I feel about gay ISIS. I feel bad for all the lesbian listeners named ISIS right now. I feel like...

Oh, San Francisco, that joke was too mean. Oh, we're sorry. Kill your television. Kill your television? I bet you ISIS isn't a terribly popular name right now.

My niece is named ISIS, you guys. Do you know? Okay. Your dad is named ISIS? Oh, your cat is named ISIS. She you guys. Do you know? Okay. Your dad is named Isis? Oh, your cat is named Isis. She's a powerful Egyptian goddess. Just because you're going to, you like to yell at it, fight Isis. No Isis.

So when, do you like tell your cat, like, is it an area that only the cat can go? And you're like, go to Mosul. Wow. Geographical war joke? Okay, fine. We'll change your name to Jack Reacher. It says Mosul on the cat's scratching post. Oh, okay.

Nice. All right, so I hope everybody understands the rules of the game. And, you know, you'll find out the hard way. You yell out your own name to buzz in. Okay. When you think you know what actor it is. the hard way. You yell out your own name to buzz in. Okay. When you think you know what actor it is. Can we buzz in other people?

Can I just yell, Mark Wahlberg? And then he has to... Oh, that'd be fun. But no. And the other point I wanted to make is that,

oh, you get bonus points for each additional one you can name if you're correct. So it's a great way to rack up points, buzzing in early. Did you just turn into a ghost? Do you guys want to all practice saying your own name once?

Curly's Gold, Scream 2. I like it. If you want to stick with those, you can yell those things out. Just has to be clearly you. Mark, what are you going to say? Mark. Okay. Kevin, have you picked to say? Mark. Okay. Kevin, have you picked anything out?

Donnie Rules. Donnie Rules. All right, so Kevin's going to buzz in with Donnie Rules. Graham's going to buzz in with Curly's Revenge. And Gaio's going to buzz in with... Scream 2. Scream 2. Have you met Donnie?

And Mark is going to... Mark is going to say Mark. How much does he owe you? I'm playing for his charity tonight. And Mark is going to say Mark. How much does he owe you? I'm playing for his charity tonight. It's called Donnie. I agree. Donnie. Who's top four on IMDb? Starts with

John Carpenter's The Thing. Cautious players. The next title is The Hateful Eight. Mark. Kurt Russell. Let's do this. That's correct. You are now tied with Graham Elwood

with one point apiece. But if you name two Kurt Russell movies that finish off the top four, you can get a point for each one. I want to say Follow Me Boys,

but I know it isn't fucking in there. And anybody listening or in this fucking room that knows that movie, you're a goddamn hero. Alright. Big Trouble Little China?

And? Escape from New York? I know, right? Incorrect on both. They went with Stargate? And Don't You Dare Say Soldier. And don't you dare say Soldier. Don't you fucking dare say Soldier.

Death Proof. No Overboard? No Overboard. No Captain Ron? They didn't fucking go Captain Ron? I should have gone Captain Ron. Overboard's the shit. Used Cars is my favorite.

Used Cars is fucking gold dude What's the one where him and Robin Are on the football team Unnecessary Roughness No Year of our lives Best of times Alright no more audience answers

For this game I heard a Captain Ron out there We're all Captain Ron Then I heard the actual Captain Ron out there. We're all Captain Ron. Then I heard the actual Captain Ron over there. Yes, Jesus. Avast, ye! Captain Ron has hit land! Captain Ron, so appropriately rated.

Here we go. It'll get there. Don go. It'll get there. Donnie. It'll get there. Darko. Polo. Darko Polo. That's when you play that game in a haunted house.

Scream. Fucking Curly's Revenge. What is it, Graham? Jake Gyllenhaal. Don't shake your head at me, Deadpool. That's incorrect. Fuck. You're down to zero points me, Deadpool. That's incorrect. Fuck. You're down to zero points.

No, I still get it. Anybody else want to jump in? Donnie Darko and Scream. Next up, Charlie's Angels. Oh, fuck. Scream 2. Drew Barrymore. That's 2. Drew Barrymore.

That's correct. Wait, is that your buzzer? Scream 2? Yeah. God damn it. E.T. The guy who has a point, he could get one more

if he could name one more E.T. in her top four. They didn't go for E.T., the extraterrestrial. Can I take it? Yes. And his adventures on Earth. They went with... Firestarter.T., The Extraterrestrial, and Adventures on Earth. They went with... Firestarter.

Never Been Kissed. Never Been Kissed. That's a great one. Nice. What's the one with Brendan Fraser? Why are you doing full title for Never Been Kissed? What? What's the one with Brendan Fraser where he's in the time capsule and she's the girl? Encino, man.

Blast from the past. Thanks, you guys. Yeah, but Drew Barrymore isn't in Blast from the Past. She's not? It's Alicia Silverstone. Oh, they all look alike. They all look alike.

Whoa, racist. That's a joke, you guys. But they do, for real. Those two, they all look alike. Okay. Can you believe what Whoopi Goldberg just said? How racist is that? What white people

have to say? For the audience at home, the listeners in the room know exactly how they feel. So Mark and Nungayo each have one point. Graham is tied with Kevin with zero. But there's always room for improvement. Who's top four starts with...

Somebody's having an issue over there. I think that one woman got the bill, and she's like, but I'm a woman. One woman got the bill and she's like, but I'm a woman. I can bring home a little bacon. Fry it up in a pan. The first film is Interstellar.

The second title, Requiem for a Dream. Third title. Donnie Rolls. What do you got there, Kevin? Paul Walker. Paul Walker? For Interstellar and Requiem for a Dream? Okay. Paul Walker for Interstellar and Requiem for a Dream okay sorry to say I've got to give you a negative one the next film the next film on the list The Exorcist

The Exorcist. Interstellar, Record for a Dream, The Exorcist, and Snappy over there is going crazy. Just remember, it's Curly's Revenge.

Oh, Curly's Revenge. Who is it, Curly? Max Monsito. Incorrect. What? Go fuck yourself! That's correct. Whoa.

Max Monsito. Incorrect. What? Go fuck yourself. That's correct. Whoa. Sorry, guys. I got jet lag.

Oh, yeah. I flew up from LA to San Francisco, and that flight could really fuck up your time. I was referring to Romania, Doug. I have Romania jet lag. Oh, Romania. He was in Romania. Romania jet lag. That's the worst kind. I wish you would have Romania'd in Romania.

Sorry, dude. It was a good try, though. You're down there with Kevin with negative one. Exorcist, Requiem for a Dream. Interstellar and The Fountain. Ayn Rand.

So you want to buzz in with that instead of Scream 2 now? No, no, I'm not buzzing in at all. Nobody? I have people in the audience know it. It's the great Ellen Burstyn. Ellen Burstyn. Crazy, awesome, and Requiem for a Dream. And of course, held down The Exorcist

quite capably. Yeah, Ellen Burstyn. Good good choice guy with mark have one Kevin and grammar negative one so it might not hurt to jump in early take some chances yeah this next round starts with the shining Graham we're Curly's revenge Graham Colin Curly's revenge you're Graham, colon, Curly's Revenge. You're right. What do you think it is? Jack Nicholson.

Incorrect. Shelley Duvall. There's about six actors in the movie, so Graham, thank you for that. The next film. Donnie Rolls. Shelley Duvall. That's correct.

Rocketing up to zero for Kevin. Can you name two more Shelley Duvall joints? Doug, I can't. Can we steal it? Can we jump in and do it? No, you can't do nothing. Just sit there frustrated. What's your one you wanted to say?

Popeye. Yeah, Popeye. Stella Vaughan and Popeye. But they didn't make her Tom Ford. The others are Time Bandits. Great movie. And Three Women. Great movie. And Three Women.

Three Women. Troop Beverly Hills? You're thinking of Shelley Long. Not Shelley Duvall. Troop Beverly Hills would have been very strange with Shelley Duvall. Oh my God. In the Shelley Long role.

I wonder if that mix-up ever happened. Was Shelley Long supposed to be in The Shining? Shelley Winters. Yes. Okay, so, yeah. Mark and a guy of one. Kevin, a zero. Graham, is it negative two? Nope.

Don't be afraid to take chances. I don't acknowledge that result. Whose top four starts with The Conjuring? Woo! And then continues on with Insidious. Not to mention The Conjuring 2 Scream 2 what do you got Scream 2

Alicia Silverstone I don't think she was in any of those fuck anyone else the fourth film yeah I'll just Curly Vera Farmiga

yeah incorrect man fuck you I'm not even in a I'll just, yeah. Curly? Vera Forminga. Yeah! Incorrect. Man, fuck you. I'm not even gonna... You can still come back, man. Graham, remember like 10 minutes ago when you were high-fiving the whole fucking audience? It's hard being on top, dude.

You go from Mark to Donnie so fast. It's hard. It's hard being on top, dude. You go from Mark to Donnie so fast. It's hard. It's hard staying on top. Did I say the fourth film yet? No. It is, in honor of Halloween, Hard Candy. Oh!

It's, uh... Audience, do not talk. Oh! Audience, do not talk. Thanks for holding it down, Mark. I just wanted to see you and Gaio work this shit out. I'm out anyway. Who was? Anything? I'm out.

I got it wrong. Oh, okay. Wait, what do you mean you got it wrong? Didn't I say the wrong answer? Oh. No, I didn't. Oh, I didn't say anything? Oh, then I'll keep my mouth shut.

Well, yeah, but you don't have the right answer. But I don't have the wrong answer. He pretended like he knew it, but he couldn't answer. That's the best. No, I didn't. I thought I said the wrong answer. He pretended like he knew it, but he couldn't answer. That's the best. No, I didn't. I thought I said the wrong one and was out. But apparently you guys didn't hear me say the wrong thing, and so I didn't. The correct answer is,

that happened to me three times. Oh yeah, you did say the wrong answer. You should have said four, because three only gets you back up to zero. Patrick Wilson. Who the fuck is that? He's the best fucking thing in Fargo season two. That's who he fucking is.

God damn, he's good. Yeah, he's a good actor. He was in... He was Night Owl? Is that what he's called? Yeah, great. Watchmen. Watchmen?

Yeah. He's really contending for Second greatest actor In Hollywood right now Oh and he's also in Yeah Angels of America And he's in Bone Tomahawk God he's fucking good

Which is Really good movie Okay so Nobody's points Were affected on that So Except Frank Gaios Who got it wrong

And I'm the only person Who remembers that I'll have Graham fight you Don't start Okay everybody You know this is a Good round Frank Ios who got it wrong. Oh, shut up. And I'm the only person who remembers that. I'll have Graham fight you. Don't start. Okay, everybody, you know, this is a good round,

especially Graham. This is a good one to just jump in right away. Curly's Revenge. I know it's been terrible advice all this time, but I think you're starting to get

the gist of what happens when you jump in too soon. The gist of what happens. Who's IMDb starts with Shaun of the Dead? Hmm. Oh, these fucking guys. Whose doesn't?

Mark. Oh, shit. Who we got, Mark? Simon Pegg. Incorrect. You guys all learned a lesson about taking a chance in life. And if any of you make it to the level of success that I do, take that chance.

Because maybe you'll let a normal person win something for once. I'm kidding. You will not reach my level of success. For now, you're down to zero. The next movie is called Paul. Oh, right. Oh, right. Mm-hmm.

The third film, The Adventures of Tintin. And finally, for one point, Tintin. And finally, for one point, Hot Fuzz. Can I say it when these guys all give up? I guess so.

Most of us know it. Because they're all done. I figured it out. I can't remember his name. I figured it out the second fucking movie that you said. Anybody got it? I got it. I can't remember his name. Oh, you can't.

I know I'm not going to win, but just tell me when they're done. Tell me when they're done. It's the guy who's not Simon Pegg. Does that count? Does that count as the answer? Everybody loves him. He's been on Douglas movies as well as Simon Pegg. It's Nick

Frost. Nick Frost. Never knew it. But that means with one point, Ngayo is our winner! Yeah! Did not know that was the last round. Would not have fucking gambled.

Did not know that was the last round. Bad time to gamble, yeah, unfortunately. But, oh, Graham is moving towards the donuts. Graham, let's get everybody's plugs in first before you start throwing donuts. Okay. I know you've been staring at them the whole show. Just ready to toss.

There's not a shithead on the back of this Kevin Kline thing? Oh, she wrote it separate. Let me pass this back to you as well. There's a shithead on the back of this, uh, Kevin Klein thing? Oh, she wrote it separate. Let me pass this back to you as well. Oh, here's, there's a shithead on the back of this shirt. Great job. All right. Shithead on the shirt. Shithead on that shirt.

And there's one on this one. Won't that be? This one, come on. Diana, I'll give you your Santa hat back. She doesn't want it. Yeah, we didn't put a lice pick in the bag Too soon? They had a really bad lice breakout in Hayward Oh really?

That one hurt you guys? What's the name of the person who won, Doug? Huh? What's the name of the person who won? Nat. Okay. Hey, Nat, just so you know, I didn't say you get to choose the person,

so cue your mom's fucking contact info up right now. He's gonna swear at your mom. Okay, that sounds good. What are you looking for? That shithead that she had up here. You picked it. Where is it? No, the purse.

No, Jenica's shithead. She passed it up here. Now it's gone. What'd you do with it? Did you put it in your pocket? Did you wipe your face with it? For the listener at home, anything is happening right now.

Did you put it in the bag? I handed it. It was right there on the bag, stoner. What? Look on the bag. It's cleverly camouflaged. Yay! We did it, everybody.

We solved the problem. Seriously, guys, Romanian jet lag is no joke. It's my new band name. It is. Let's get the prizes over to Nat. Congratulations. Nat, yay!

Way to go, Nat. So much stuff. Yeah, and then this random heavy vase. Flowers from Mark Wahlberg. Aww. Flowers for Mark Wahlberg. You're welcome. Careful, there's water in there.

That book is due back to the San Jose Public Library by tomorrow. Also. Pay attention to the Romanian lay exchange rate. You might want to hang on to that. It might be worth a buck and a quarter, maybe a buck 35 down the road. Look at me when I talk to you. I...

Sorry. Graham, do you got anything to plug? Earbuds, the podcasting documentary, will be for sale November 17th on ComedyFilmNerds.com. If you're a Kickstarter backer, documentary will be for sale November 17th on comedy film nerds calm if you had your Kickstarter backer you'll get your download thing a couple days before it so thank you to everybody you supported it and come to comedy filmers calm we're selling standard def and high def versions of it and the DVD will be out a little later on. Graham Elwood, ladies and gentlemen.

Mark Wahlberg. You fucking know it, dude. Wahlberg's is probably sitting on your DVR and the new season's coming out soon, so watch that shit. You fucking deserve it. Deepwater Horizon, go see it a second time. Other than that, it was great to let all of you people

fucking see me. Mark Wahlberg. Kevin Kline. Mornings on Live 105. I'd like to promote Donnie Wahlberg and Blue Bloods. Guys, guys, guys.

Nobody was throwing donuts during earplugs Let's just get through all the plugs I have a radio show It's like a podcast Holder on Funny Friend It's here in the Bay Area Live 105 every morning Thank you

We are one of the top 37 most popular Alternative rock shows in the Bay Area Thank you. We are one of the top 37 most popular alternative rock shows in the Bay Area. Thank you, Kevin Kline. Thanks, Doug. Who's gluten-free so I know where to aim? Perfect. All right, Mgayo? Cannabis Comedy Festival in Sacramento at Harlow's

on November 14th. It's a Monday night, and it's a 420 friendly venue after the show in the back. Listen to my new podcast on CannabisRadio.com and on iTunes. It's called

Rolling With Ungayo. Follow me on all the things N-G-A-I-O-4-2-0 and smoke a bowl with me next time you see me. That would be all mine. Oh, outside right now? Oh, and buy my CD

after the show. You can also buy it on iTunes or CDBaby.com. Buy a CD and smoke a bowl with him after the show. You can also buy it on iTunes or cdbaby.com. Buy a CD and spoke of all of them after the show. And Guy O'Bielum! Supporting Guy O's children.

Douglas Movies is coming to San Antonio at the LOL Comedy Club on Saturday, November 3rd at 420. Throw the donuts, gentlemen. Yeah! Buckle up, balcony.

Buckle up, balcony. This one's got a death You got it, you got it. Come on, do it. This one's got a death skull on it. Who wants some red velvet goodness. That's it. That's all the donuts. Thanks again. All right. as always,

traffic is a shithead. Donald Trump is a shithead. And the 2016 election is a shithead. And the 2016 election is a shit-ass. Play that end theme song. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing crowd was makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you. Because Doug loves movies.

Thank you guys so much. It's hard for you, cause Doug loves movies!