Doug Loves Movies - Graham Elwood Vs. Pittsburgh

Episode Date: August 3, 2013

Graham Elwood plays the Leonard Maltin Game against audience members at The Improv in Pittsburgh, PA.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug Loves Movies! Pittsburgh at the Improv, and I'll play the audio of Graham Elwood playing the Leonard Malton game against audience members at the end of this shorty. Since last I spoke, you listened. I got to see a few more movies at the Traverse City Film Festival in the beautiful Bijou and State Theaters, both built by Michael Moore, who I cannot thank enough for having me at the festival. I saw Gold Diggers of 1933, quaint, Contiki, intense, and a hijacking, very intense. Thank you to everyone who works at the festival and everyone in attendance. I cannot wait for next year, and I'll see you at the Comedy Festival next winter.

Brrrr. Now it's time for Not For Emetophobes. Hell Baby, currently on iTunes and VOD and whatnot, is not for Emetophobes. But it is for Laughaholics. This has been Not for Emetophobes. Tom

Lennon, co-director, co-writer and co-star of Hell Baby, cannot return to Douglas Movies in LA on Tuesday because of television, but I've got some great guests lined up and we'll try to have him back soon. That's what I like to call a real cliff dangler. Dangler. Get it? I don't. Thursday, this Thursday, August 8th, I'm doing stand-up at the Grand Theater in Salem, Oregon. And if you live anywhere near Portland, be sure to watch me on AM Northwest that morning.

Now it's time for Watch This, Not That. I'm guessing the number one movie at the box office this weekend will be Two Guns. And the number two movie should be Smurfs 2. I don't plan to see either anytime soon, but I would see Smurfs 2 Guns if they ever make that, because I wonder what color Smurfs blood is. This has been Don't Watch This or That. Doug Loves Movies at Comedy Unstate in Madison, Wisconsin is close to sold out, so come to my stand-up show on Saturday, August 10th at 420 and bring a name tag and possibly get chosen to play the Leonard Maltin game.

Speaking of which, it's time to listen to my handheld echoey recording of Graham Elwood taking on the crowd at the Pittsburgh Improv. Enjoy. It's time, Pittsburgh, for the Leonard Maltin game. Let's look in the prize bag, which is a beautiful improv bag, because we're here at the Pittsburgh Improv. Nice. It's really the homestead Improv, right? Sure. Yeah. But you know, it's close to Pittsburgh. Yeah. It's right over there. Just barely points over there. We're in Motel 10, Mr. Today you get to win, if you win today, a $10 iTunes gift card so you can buy bonus episodes of Dungeons & Movies and Shoddy Film Notes.

Or whatever you want to get with it. You know, you can buy the new Robin's dick. Woo! That's right. That guy knows how to put some titties in a hoodie. We've got copies of My True, Linus Alcate, and Smurf Life. We've got some comics. We've got a comic on San Diego.

We've got The Pro, which looks like a fun one. Looks like a... Yeah, looks fun. Right? This is some sort of a skanked out superhero whose hands are trying to grab the boobs of a cover. And then we've got another one called Non-Lan, volume one. And another one that's called Non-Player, by Mae Simpson. And then, is there anything else in there?

Oh, you're gonna put something in there. I'll put my CD, Paul Strutt Dance then, is there anything else there? I think that's... Oh, you're going to put something. I'll put my CD, Paul Strutt Dance Party, in there. Paul Strutt Dance Party! So all this is something to win if they get their name tag picked and they come up on stage and can beat Graham

in one round of the Leonard Vaughn game. So let's, people who brought name tags, please present them now. We are. The gentleman in the front row has a signed volume and Barack picture. He signed it just for you. To Zach. Very good.

Bob and Barack are doing some releases. I just walked right up to him. You're good at presenting. You are presenting. It's a Sharpie. It's a Sharpie. Oh, I took a Sharpie. Dove hearts Larry on your head?

You should have ran that by me. Thank you so much for letting me wear a real tattoo. Thank you for the Thanksgiving event for presenting it. That was smart of you, because you're sitting way back there. It's kind of hard to see. There's the giant for Mrs. Swift poster. They've been on stage before. Very good at the Leonard Wald game, as it turns out.

I see you're waiting now. Thank you so much. Someone's just waving. She's waving to her friends, you know. Oh, I see. What does it say in his eyes? What does the name tag say? Sean. Sean the mower? Well, who would you like to pick, Graham? This is tough. You guys are all doing a good job. Oh, and there's the... He's got the...

It says Leonard Maltin Game Champion. Is that your Twitter handle? At Ben Socks. He's got all the years that he's been a champion. 1916, 1924, 1936. All right, that's cool. Come on, get up here with that thing. Round of applause for all the fans out there. And Peter Paul, John Connor, Ted Cruz, all of us.

Go stand next to Graham over there. I'm glad that you, and I love that he grabbed his beer to bring up here with him. Like he doesn't already have his hands full with his giant sign. And well, yeah, you can put it on the stool there. What's the furry thing hanging out of the front of it? Chewbacca. That's Chewbacca? And it makes a noise? Chewbacca is very tired.

It's a very ill Chewbacca. I had a really bad sandwich. He's on his deathbed. That's an adorable little Chewbacca. The whole sign kind of baffles me, but Graham liked it. I totally did. It's the Montreal Canadiens that won all these Stanley Cups. So he just took this banner and then... People are booing.

Well, there's obviously Mr. Penguin fans here. People are booing. Well, there's obviously Mr. Penguin fans here. Boo! Boo! Boo! That's what you thought I was not liking. He's really perfect for a team. Yeah. I like that. All right, you guys. Let's play.

This is just between Ben, who sucks, and Graham Elwood. This is his Twitter handle. My app is acting up here. My app is being weird. It is, Graham. We might not be able to play if I can't get this shit worked out. Okay, fine.

I got it worked out. Leonard's alive. What's Ben saying? Leonard's alive. Leonard lives. Oh, yeah, I hope out. Leonard's alive. What's Ben say? Leonard's alive. Leonard lives. Oh, yeah, I hope so. That's a morbid thing to say. Here are your options. You get to pick a category.

Celebrating a birthday today, the great Martin Sheen. Nice. Yeah. Do you know anything you did that's weird at all? Like Jim Caviezel Day or something like that. That and all, like... Jim Caviezel Day, or something like that. Say it like what it was. Oh, that's good that... I hope Jim Caviezel finds out that you think he's a weirdo.

I think he's a wonderful actor, but he's like, Oh, woo-hoo! He's a little different. Yeah, yeah, he's... A little Jesus-y. Yeah, yeah, he's Jesus-y. That's right, Ben. Yeah. Uh, your other options, Ben, are Inconceivable, which is movies with infertile women. Or Sausage Fest, and that's a movie where Leonard doesn't list any women in the acting listings at the end of the review.

There may be women in it, but he doesn't list any for one reason or another. Which one of those categories would you like to play? Martha Sheen, infertile women, or no women in the cast? Let's go with Sausage Fest. Sausage Fest! Let's go Sausage Fest! You know, judging from your shirt and your hat and your sign, you're pretty much living a sausage fest. What? You're not going to do the tail? Come on. Where's your lady at today? Non-existent. That's what I thought. But who knows? Maybe you'll meet somebody.

Yeah, maybe there's somebody up front with a Bob Newhart picture. Who wants to try something new. Who's the new spirit running the night? Let's have what we call Len Walton Tea Party. Is it illegal in Pennsylvania to have sex with a man on stage? Yeah, can you guys turn it out on the phone? I'm telling you, my app is completely fucked up for some reason. It's never froze up on me like this before. So hopefully we can get this shit together.

It might be the rainstorm. Does it really mess with apps like that? Is that a real thing? Because it really is just not working. And it's usually so dependable it only costs $5 in the app store.

Leonard did a great job with it. Okay, here we go. I really filled in nicely there. What a professional I am. Ben, would you like a movie from 1957 or 1992?

That is a sausage fest. Really? 1957 he picked. Did you win that year? Yes, he did. 1957, yes he did. Four stars from Leonard for this movie that he calls a brilliant film.

He says that it was the director's impressive debut as a director. And he also says that it was remade for television in, what year is that? 1997. And he lists 12 names. How many names can you get it in? He says zero names here. Wow! Is he invited to the email queue

this chapter? All right. Jesus. Graham, let me just one more, settle. All right. Oh, Jesus. Graham, let me just... One more. Settle down back there. Name one. 57.

Four stars from Leonard. Brilliant. Remade on TV. The director's debut. And he lists 12 people that are all men. How many names, Graham? Who's the negative one? Negative one.

I don't know where you're going, Graham. You need to be near Ben. He gets to Ben now. Is it 12 angry jurors? Is it Henry Fonda? It is Henry Fonda, but it's called 12 angry men, dummy. 12 angry men. 12 angry men that are jurors?

You lose, sucker. Ben is our winner. Bullshit! Cheers, Ben. Cheers, Ben. Congratulations, Ben. Thank you so much for playing. And thank you for bringing me back. And thank you. And let's hear it for Graham Sullivan, everybody.

Thank you so much! You probably made me male jerks. What an exciting round of Leonard Maltin that was. It's funny, I always call it like, this will be called... This will be called... This will be called Graham Elwood versus Pittsburgh, but it's always like, it usually only takes one person for a dance,

so it's not really... But you represent Pittsburgh in many ways. Yeah. So, good job, Ben. Oh, Ben! And as always, the rural juror is a shithead. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.

There's no room in his heart for you, because Doug loves movies!