Doug Loves Movies - Harland Williams, Dave Shumka, and Big Irish Jay Hollingsworth Guest

Episode Date: November 17, 2012

Live from The Comedy Mix in Vancouver, BC, Canada, Doug welcomes Harland Williams, Dave Shumka, and Big Irish Jay Hollingsworth to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming baby sticky seeds With 50 azipop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Because Doug loves cookies! Hey everybody! My name is Doug and I love movies. You knew that. This is Doug Loves Movies coming to you from the comedy mix

in Vancouver, Canada. That's the Vancouver it is. On Saturday, November 17th, 2 Oceans 12, at 420-ish. A few minutes after 420. That's how I like to do it. You know how I roll. Since last I spoke and you listened

I recorded episode 10 of Dining with Doug and Karen with guest Allison Rosen and Chef Savan and it's available for your ear area enjoyment now on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts now it's time for Not for a Metaphobes

I can confirm that not only is the comedy starring Tim Heidecker not a comedy, it is also not for emetophobes. The title character, that's what I call him. He's the comedy in the comedy. The title character gets drunk and hurls off the side of a boat. This has been not for emetophobes. San Diego, California.

I'm doing stand-up at the American Comedy Company on Wednesday, November 21st with Brian Desquad Red Band, and I'm taping Douglas Movies again. The next road taping is in New York City on Monday, November 26th at the Gramercy Theater. One of the best guests

from one of the last few New York episodes has pledged to return, schedule permitting, so it should be good fun. Now it's time for Watch This, Not That, audience edition. Yeah, let's do an audience edition. Kyle, there's a guy in the far row with a Kyle name tag on. What's your, you know,

what's one of your favorite movies? Back to the Future. Oh, okay. Fair enough. You're Jonathan? Yeah, and it says, Hey everybody, my name is Jonathan and I love movies. What are you trying to steal my gig?

Because I'm kind of sleepy today. If you don't mind jumping up. I would love it to just watch Jonathan do the whole show. Yeah, I've got it all written down. Except for what's about to happen. This is the real tightrope. Or catwalk, or I don't know what you call it. What's one of your favorite movies, Jonathan?

Ed Wood. Ooh. Whoa. This is a toughie. This is very tough, because I have to say, you guys both nailed it in terms of Back to the Future's probably one of my favorite Robert Zemeckis joints.

And... He doesn't call them that. And Ed Wood is most certainly top two or three Tim Burton movies. It's one of the few that has some sort of story happening in it. Oh shit, iconic performances from Johnny Depp and Michael J. Fox. Crispin Glover, is he in Ed Wood? He should be. He should be.

You know who Sarah Jessica Parker is. Wow, this might be the toughest one that I've ever had to make this kind of decision. This is the Sophie's Choice. Watch this, not that. But since everybody here has seen Back to the Future a million times, and a lot of people here haven't seen it once, or

if they have, they should see it a second time, I'm going to say, watch Ed Wood's not Back to the Future as much as it pains me to say the sentence don't watch Back to the Future. Who can say that out loud without throwing up or passing out or something? Austin, Texas, I'm coming back to do Douglas movies at 420 on Friday, December 7th.

And a Benson movie interruption of a Christmas classic on December 6th at 7 o'clock, both at the Alamo Drafthouse Ritz. Drafthouse.com for tickets and more info. Who doesn't love more info? Let's look at the prize bag, you guys. We've got some great prizes for you. We've got a pumpkin, because it's that time of the season.

It's that time of year. It's got a fun face drawn on it. And then a signature of the person who did it on the back. And then we've got a t-shirt from a very popular podcast. And another t-shirt from a popular comedian. Now this isn't a Doug Dixit. This was just one of the guests thought it would be funny to bring the DVD of Showgirls. Yeah. This was just, one of the guests thought it'd be funny to bring the DVD of Showgirls.

And I brought, direct from Austin, Texas, a Tito's handmade vodka hat and a copy of my CD, Smug Life. And since it's rainy outside, also in the, is an emergency poncho. So, especially if you have an elaborate name tag that you don't want to get wet when you leave, that poncho might come in handy. So let's give a, please give a big warm welcome to my guests. I've written it down even. Big Irish J. Hollingsworth, Dave Shumka, and Harlan Williams! Hello Joe Benson right here Come on now That's right Everyone is pretty aware that I'm here

But I appreciate the recap buddy But are they aware that you're my daughter? No I was going to reveal that a little later in the show because it's such a fun, exciting piece of information. You are the father. What's that? That's Big Irish Jay, the dude

that's so huge, he has two nicknames, everybody. Big Irish Jay Hollingsworth drove up from Seattle, where you preside over Parlor Live. You run that place with an iron fist. Great comedy club. And a one-inch punch. Yeah, we've done

the one-inch punch there. I don't recommend it. I mean, you've never one-inch punched me, and that's how I'm going to keep it. Right. I mean, unless you sneak one in. But I'm at least expecting it. And you have a podcast, right? Yes. We all have podcasts. Who And you have a podcast, right? Yes.

We all have podcasts. Who doesn't have a podcast these days? Yes, the Hollingsworthless podcast. That's a fun play on your last name. That's why I do this. I'd call it the Long Hollingsworth. I mean, if I had to think of something just now, that's what I would call it. Well, thank you for being here, buddy, and for driving up.

Was it hard to get across the border? No, I was worried about it, but no, it was easy. Easy peasy. Okay. It's not a big weekend to drive up here, I guess. No. Because I've sat in some long-ass lines driving across the border. Yeah, it was just five minutes.

Bam. Boom. Good luck across the border. Yeah, it was just five minutes. Bam! Good luck getting back home. Dave Shonka is here everybody. From the very popular and from this region, stop podcasting yourself. That's right, hello. Pleasure to be here. What's your partner on that show, Graham Clark, what's he up to today?

He's actually working in a video store Sort of took a job at a video store without like he's a little bit ashamed of it Yeah, he's like he acting like he's doing it for charity like yeah Like but he's the charity case Make a wish i wish i could be paid a lot more to work in a video store that's his wish and um you uh you guys talk about just all manner of things we do on the show we talk about what f's yeah and we have a segment called overheard that's our big thing where people just send in the things that they overheard on We talk about what Fs. And we have a segment called Overheard. That's our big thing where people just send in the things that they overheard on the street. Oh, okay.

Like, I see that in Twitter sometimes. Someone will write O-H and then something somebody says. No, I know. I didn't think you invented letters. But I bring it up because I don't know why I don't know where I was going with that line of questioning But

Because he works in a video store And your guests are often comedians And entertainers So I'm sure movies come up From time to time And people Sitting around before a movie people people just talk and you just overhear people like in the audience when you're sitting around or between trailers people love talking

like my favorite was the it was like 10 years ago Jason X the one in space. It was just playing that song, Let the Bodies Hit the Floor. Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor. Sure, sure. Yeah. Now I'm gonna owe some money to ASCAP. Cause you said so many of the lyrics.

And then right when the trailer ended, we overheard someone say, That's an awesome soundtrack. Somebody's a good song picker. I remember one dumb joke I was running for, aiming towards when I brought up the OH thing. Is on Twitter, I used to, when people write OH and then something, this is a great soundtrack, I used to think it was what people just all digs on

Ohio. OH. If you have something to say about Ohio, just put OH before it. Thank you, Dave, for being here. Does that mean when you say okay, you think it means Oklahoma?

Yes, doesn't it? I'll meet you in a few minutes, and then the person texts back, okay, and I'm like, oh shit, I gotta go all the way to Oklahoma? It might be more than a few minutes. And that's Harlan Williams, everybody. Yeah!

And that's Harlan Williams, everybody. He's responsible for this beauty. The pumpkin that he put a delightful... You just drew it on there. Like, why cut into it? Why not just draw it right on there, a face? Yeah, it's a lot easier. It's not as messy. And I'm sponsored by Staples.

Yeah, it's a lot easier, it's not as messy, and I'm sponsored by Staples, so... The trick with drawing on a pumpkin is you have to wait until you're at a party and it falls asleep. Like when it gets wasted, then you take out the Sharpie and go to town. Exactly. Fucking drunken pumpkin. Oh, and I like the way Harland, the D, has got your face in it. Yeah. Or not your face, but a face.

Yeah. And then what's this nastiness on his side? That's pumpkin diarrhea. They eat too many Halloween candies. It's a nasty pumpkin. And we have, from Dave,

we have a Stop Podcasting Yourself t-shirt. That's right. And from Jay, we have a shirt that I wear sometimes. And I still don't understand the joke, what it means. You want me to say it real quick?

Sure. Oh, God. It says South Boston Recycling and then something else. And then bottle them. Right. Boston, bottle them. A girl in Southie, bottle of a girl in Southie. I saw a girl in Southie. What's Southie South Boston?

I've never heard that. Yeah, it's by Oklahoma. But OK, but a girl in South Boston, this guy was being rude to this huge dude. So from the back of the bar, one of these guys in Southie just goes, bottle. And we were all like, what the fuck? And next thing I know, the fucking chick looks, grabs a beer bottle, and fucking hits this guy in the head with a bottle. So I was like, wow, Southie has a really aggressive recycling program.

So that's the joke. And all of that is on a shirt. Bill! That anyone, the person who wins it is going to have to explain all of that. My website is on there too. You can just say, just go all of that. My website's on there, too. You can just say, just go to the website. The joke's on there. Yeah, I used to have a shirt.

I had a joke in my act about how we couldn't afford Famous Amos cookies when I was younger, so we had to eat heinous anus cookies. And we had a shirt that looked like the Famous Amos cover, the front of the package, but it said heinous anus. And it sold okay, but I imagine aous anus. And it sold okay, but I imagine a lot of people that bought it are like, oh, I gotta explain this joke. And I have the word anus on my chest.

Also, that's a lose, lose, lose. So Harlan, you're up here, I mean, you're from Canada. Yeah. But you're here now shooting a TV show? Yeah, a sitcom called Package Deal. It's got a guy with a big unit. Yeah.

If it fits, it ships. Yeah, yeah. That's it. I guess. I nailed it. And when and where can we see that? I think it's going to be out in the fall. In Canada it'll be City TV. Woo!

And, uh, everywhere. Everywhere. Woo! City! City TV everywhere. You can watch it on the back of your grandmother's head if you want. Everywhere. And then the States, I don't know. I think they might be doing it with ABC, but I'm not sure yet. Oh, okay. Yep. So, having a good time. So you're up here for a little while. Yeah.

Just hanging out. Yeah. Well, that was good timing that you're here. Yeah. Thanks for having me. It's an honor. Thank you. You have been in some, like, thanks for having me. It's an honor. Thank you. You have been in some like serious classic motion pictures. Dumb and Dumber, there's something about Mary Half-Baked. Do you have a favorite of all the films you've been in? Rocket Man. Rocket Man, of course. That guy thinks he's being funny.

That guy thinks he's being funny, but... Well, that was a good one. That was like you were the new Don Knotts in that movie. That was like a Don Knotts vehicle. More like Temple Grandin. A space vehicle. Is that a shirt from the Temple Grandin collection? Yeah, this is the Temple Grandin shirt. It smells like horse.

It smells like horse? Yeah. Horse. Horse. Horse. I have a snake thing. You really are. We need to get down to it.

But I personally, since you haven't answered the question yet, I'm going to answer it for you. No, that's okay. It's so polite here. Even on my show, this is going to be probably the least disruptive panel in the history of the show. Fuck that. Sorry to interrupt. As long as you don't bottle me, I'm happy. Nobody bottle me.

But every time I'm flipping around TV and it's on cable, I watch, in its entirety, Employee of the Month. I fucking love watching that movie. I don't know why. I can't explain it. You are as well. And some other really funny people. Dax Shepard.

Dax Shepard's hilarious. Jessica Simpson, hilarious. And she's got crazy big ears in it. You know what that means, right? Yeah, retarded. That wasn't the offensive thing I was going for at all. I was going to say big vagina, big ears, big vagina. Haven't you heard that?

Like if you put your ear to any of the three, you hear the ocean. I was with a girl once and I put my ear to her vagina and I could hear the Caspian Sea. Is that weird? What kind of noise does the sea make? You gotta have waves for some noise. That's really weird. That's a lonely fisherman. It's not the sea itself making that noise. That's crazy.

But do you have a favorite of the films you've worked on? God, I loved... That's such a fun, insane detour that there's something about Mary Takes where suddenly Ben Stiller's just riding around with a serial killer. And that's you. That was a hell of a lot of fun. There's a funny story, if you want me to mention it.

Sure. When we were shooting that scene, it was the middle of the night, and we're down in Florida, and we're sitting in the car, and they took the front windshield out for a couple of the takes, and Peter Farrelly was sitting right on the hood of the car while me and Ben were doing the scene. It was a pretty intense scene because it was Constant I mean when you see the movie you see all the cuts

But it was a running scene there were no breaks in it. So we had a lot of stuff to remember and deal with and Peter Farrelly's like sitting on the hood While we're driving for miles getting all these lines up the scene, and in the middle of this intense scene, he's farting. Like, real fart. He's trying to break us while we're acting. We're like, what is wrong with you, dude? And we just, for the record, we did not break,

and we made it through, and it was pretty fun. So, a little fart story there. I seem to remember wondering why your eyes were watering up during that scene. That's pretty amazing that he has that kind of control. Because I've never been able to fart for laughs or to prank somebody in my entire life. I did it once. I was doing a show once and I was eating it. I was it once. I was doing a show once and I was eating it. I was just bombing.

I was on stage doing an hour show and I was like 40 minutes into it and I was eating it so bad and I could feel a fart welling up inside. And I said,

okay, I'm not getting any laughs at all. I just put the microphone right here. I let it rip. And from then on, I had a great show. That's a true story. Yeah, sometimes it takes brilliance

to turn an audience around. Or just cauliflower. to turn an audience around. Or just cauliflower. But I think some of my favorites were maybe sorority boys was a lot of fun. And superstar, I got to work with Will Ferrell and Molly Shand. Yeah, they're great. And just a blast.

Will was hilarious. He's such a, you know, Will's sense of humor. And when you're doing a movie, you get these big trailers that you go to in between takes, and they're set up with microwave ovens and fridges and beds and everything. And we're on lunch one day, and Will's like, hey, you want to come over to my trailer?

And I'm like, what's going on? He goes, oh, I have a nice 12-pound turkey basting in the microwave. That's awesome. Did he really have this? No, it was a baby. Turns out it was just a baby. Put the stuffing in it, delicious. Let's just go down the line.

We'll start with Big Irish Jay. Have you been to a Big Irish movie lately? Not an Irish one, but unless Denzel Washington's Black Irish. I went and saw Flight. Oh, don't you have to fly sometimes? Yes. Isn't that a bummer, that movie?

Yeah. I mean, every time you get on a plane now, I hope this guy's not drunk. That's why I get drunk before I get on, that I just don't really worry about. Yeah, yeah. But did you like the movie? Yeah, it was alright. I saw that and then also the new Bond flick. I like the Bond one better. Yeah. Skyfall. Yeah. But they could interchangeable the titles turns out I'm sure there's some assholes who are watching the wrong movie as we speak

what's that sky Skyflight or something? And what'd you think? Too much dench? Do you agree with me? Too much dench? No. No, I liked it. Can't get enough dench.

Yeah. All right, well, you're not right. Yeah. That sounds like a vaginal disease. Oh, Christ, I got the dench again. Yeah. Oh Christ, I got the dent again.

You laugh like you've had it. Just trying to, you know, play along and move along. It's not funny. Is that Mediterranean I sniffed off? Alright, Dave. I'm going to skip. I'm going to go to Dave now. Okay.

Even though I already know Harlan saw Skyfall also. How do you know? We were talking backstage. You guys, we can talk about Skyfall all you want. I haven't seen it though. Oh, okay. Could you please sum up Skyfall not't seen it, though. Oh, okay. Could you please sum up Skyfall,

not having seen it? All right. The new Bond is blonde. He's brooding a bit. A lady dies. Not Lady Di. And then Denzel Washington drops out of the sky.

They should do that the next James Bond. Have a flashback to show the time that he couldn't help Lady Di. Like he wasn't there for her. Like there could be scenes of him being her guy, her personal, like he watches over her. One night he gets drunk. He listens to the Elton John song over and over.

Goodbye England's Rose, let the bodies hit the floor. I was going to guess the Elton John song you were talking about was Crocodile Rock. That was my first guess. Remember when Princess Di was killed by those crocodiles? That's rocked! So have you been to the cinema? The last movie I saw was on Netflix. It was a movie called This is England and it's it's all about how terrible England is. Everyone in that country is a skinhead. All of them? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

The whole economy runs on Doc Martens. They do have a good health care system. Yeah, yeah. From all the shit-kicking. So, how did you happen upon This Is England? Because it sounds like a different movie than you'd initially expect. It's got no one you've heard of except that one guy from Boardwalk Empire who plays Al Capone. Oh, so it's not a documentary? No, no, no.

It's a scripted feature. It's a talkie. And, yeah, no, I found out just like movie nerds were like, hey, you gotta check out this movie. It's, if you hate England, you gotta check out this movie. What would This is Canada be like? Oh, man. Let me tell you.

Is there sequel potential? Oh, it would be a lot of flannel. A lot of apologizing. It's also This is Seattle. Okay, Harlan. Skyfall, let's talk about it. Yeah, yeah. What'd you think?

I dug it, man. I dug it. Two of my favorite scenes. The scene where he first meets the villain bond is tied to a chair the villain comes and starts like touching yeah just such a weird really strange contact really cool but what was cool about it is a lot of times these days they kind of rush scenes in movies and this one they just rolled the camera and let the guy just take his time, which should have been like a 30 second scene, took about 8 minutes. It was great. It was great.

I think that sums up every scene in the movie. It's been about 7 minutes longer than it needed to take, but sometimes very much in a fun way. The chase scene at the beginning, I think it's like 20 minutes goes by, and then when the credits start, you go, oh, that's right. They still have to do these fancy credits that they do at the beginning of every James Bond movie, but they used to be great because it was naked

girls flying around, and now it's just Daniel Craig with a deck of cards. Daniel Craig with a deck of cards. Yeah, yeah. Those ears of his when he's in silhouette, I thought it was Barack Obama. Was there another scene that you liked? There's another scene where he's in a bar, like an Asian bar, where he's talking with the bad guy's girlfriend. And I thought she was just going to be like a Bond girl, or was all eye candy and stuff,

but she turned out to be a really amazing actress. She had an incredible, like, there's about a five minute scene where they're just sitting there talking and she's smoking and just the acting she did she does one little thing with her eye where she has these beautiful eyes and one of them kind of started like drooping like a Chernobyl eye or something but it's just subtle if you see see the movie, just watch for that Temple Grandin eye. It's great. It's great. This guy's on a real Temple Grandin camera.

Yeah, do you watch Homeland? No, I don't. I watch Homeboy. Okay. No. And any other movies you've been to lately besides? I went to see Silent Hill 3D. No, you didn't. Yeah, I did.

Why? Because I like guys with metal triangles on their heads and giant butcher knives. That's why. I don't know. I like some of the visual stuff. I like imagery. And there's some nightmarish imagery with people with their faces stitched shut you know they look like you know calamari monsters

do you have you seen the human centipede film yeah I saw the first one yeah I actually liked it I thought I would and I actually thought why haven't you gone back for a second helping maybe you're gone back for more of that shit? Because I saw the trailer for the second one and it looked like a totally different movie. Oh, like different filmmakers or something? It looked like totally different, yeah. It didn't have the same ass-to-mouth vibe.

By the way, you know what I've always wanted to do to a centipede? This is just me. You know they have like a hundred legs? Sure. And they can crawl around everywhere. I'd love to catch one and pluck every leg, but its back too, just to see it have to stand up to walk. Is that right? I don't think it could.

But it's still worth checking out. Still worth giving it a shot. Okay, I will. And do you have a favorite James Bond movie? Is it Skyfall? Or one of the other 22? Believe it or not, it's not the best Bond movie, but I think I'd have to say The Man with the Golden Gun, because I saw it when I was a 13-year-old boy when I was going to boarding school, and the headmaster had a movie night

for all the boys, and he let us go into the little town Silent Hill it was weird he had a movie night and he let us go into this little town to the movie theater and watch The Man with the Golden Gun and I was just like mesmerized by it because I didn't know how movies worked and I you know

and so it just blew my mind so it was a fond memory of me getting out of boarding school for two hours so it was good yeah it's a pretty amazing movie though just blew my mind. It was a fond memory of me getting out of boarding school for two hours. So it was good. Yeah, it's a pretty amazing movie, though. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's got some,

you know, the bad guy Scaramanga has a third nipple. Is that what that is? That must have been very eye-opening for you as a young man that there's people

out there with three nipples. I just thought maybe his parents shook him as a baby and his anus shifted. That's one explanation for it. And Herve Villachez... Well, it's Villachez.

And it's Harvey, by the way, not Herve. Harvey Villachez plays Nicknack, who is Scaramanga's sidekick which is weird because if you ever want to get rid of him you just take him to a garage sale I think it's safe to do spoilers from James Vaughn movies from the 70s at the very end of the movie

the final shot of the movie, he's like in some sort of net high up on the mast of the boat while James Bond's fucking the girl. And he's up there like let me down, let me down! And then the credits start to roll. It's kind of sad that

he didn't show up in another James Bond movie because he didn't die. Yeah, I know. Unless he died up there on the mast. It would have been funny if he fell off and landed on them while they were having sexual intercourse. Imagine that. It would be like the shuttle on the back of a jumbo jet.

It's just a little Mexican midget on your back. He was Mexican, wasn't he? a Mexican midget on your back? He was Mexican, wasn't he? Yes, I think so. I believe. You know how Vilichez is pronounced, but you're wondering if he's Mexican. A buddy of mine,

it's the best tattoo I've ever seen, my buddy has a tattoo of tattoo. He really does? He does, he has a tattoo tattoo. Which I thought was the best tattoo in the world. Did he get that before or after that poor gentleman committed suicide? Is that how he died? He killed himself? I think so.

How? Or somebody left him out on top of a boat. How did he do it? I think he killed himself. I mean, if you're a midget, you've got a lot of places you could jump off. Sure, I think all it

took was a shoestring and a doorknob. He stood on a box of Kleenex and jumped. Too many options, man. Yeah, everything was just a reminder to him that he could kill himself

pretty easily if he wanted to. I'll get in this refrigerator or this oven. Which one? Which do I prefer? Hot or cold? He could be doing, like, doggy style and fall off and kill himself. That might have been what happened.

Dave, do you have a favorite James Bond flick? I feel like I missed a lot of the early ones, and they seem so bad and old. Like, I don't like any of the Sean Connery ones or Roger Moore. And Timothy Dalton never seemed like very... It just seemed like a... It sounds like these movies are not for you. If you're discounting Connery and Moore. I mean, what Daniel Craig is doing with it is okay.

I don't hate it, but it's just like, it's different. Is this new one better or worse than the first two? It's better than Quantum of Solace. And probably better than... It's probably the Quantum of Solace and probably better than it's probably the best of the three Daniel Craig ones. Did the early, did young James Bond and by young James Bond I mean 50 year old Sean Connery

did he do any parkour? No, but there is a scene where he's wishing it would be invented because it would be invented. Because it would be a good way to get away from people or catch them. Because that's what's funny about James Bond. I went with somebody who'd never seen any James Bond movie. Not any part of any of them.

So I tried to explain before the movie what was going to happen. And I said, well, you know, you just have to take it on faith that James Bond is the good guy. Even though sometimes he'll be chasing a person, and sometimes someone will be chasing him. So you always just have to keep your eye on James Bond and root for that person. And it seemed to work out pretty good. It's always like a battle of really handsome versus deformed. Like either a guy with a third nipple or diamonds stuck in his face. Yeah, that's how you get into the bad guy guy business is you've got some fucked up shit going on

you're like tiny and you could die if you have doggy style sex with somebody so do you have a favorite one Jay? I like the Connery ones but I can't think they're all like blended together now all the different ones I've seen. But Connery was my favorite as far as the Bond.

Yeah, yeah. It starts off a little slow with Dr. No from Russia with Love, but then Goldfinger's really fun because he's got Oddjob with the hat that kills people. Wouldn't that be great if you just had a hat that you just threw it at somebody across the street and then they're dead? You know what would have been great if Laurel and hardy could have done that yeah just you could have killed each other could have been the most hilarious murder suicide in the history of the early talkies but yeah i like uh i like goldfinger a lot and And, you know, a lot of people attack it,

but I think when Sean Connery came back and did Diamonds Are Forever, I think that's one that was right in my wheelhouse when I was young, as far as it had everything that I would want in a movie, and mostly two girls in bathing suits trying to kill James Bond through

gymnastics and drowning. And their names are Bambi and Thumper. So that's pretty sweet that that happened. And I'm getting like, I'm like thinking I need to have some more of my glaucoma medication

because there is a light here that is just flickering like it's almost like saying could you guys wrap this up it looks like it's the comedy club signal to end the show but it's just like a light that just needs to be like we need Fonzie to punch it And then it'll be fixed Yay So does anybody hunger for games? It's the place of ever loving games What's the name of your podcast?

The Harlan Highway How often do you do that? I do it twice a week, Mondays and Thursdays. You're like a podcasting pioneer. I mean, yours has been around for a while, right? Yeah, I think about three, four years now. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Awesome. Yeah. And it's what happens on it? It's me just talking, doing stories and and stuff but I have a lot of like a library of like imaginary characters that I do all the voices for stuff like a whole gallery of like ridiculous characters that I do that I mingle in with my commentary on this during the show I gotta listen this what's it called again Harlem highway all

right let me write that down because uh that sounds really fun so you don't you don't have any guests or anything i do i do have guests from time to time it's rare i i probably only had over the course of the the duration of my show i probably only had about maybe 15 guests but i like it but i just i part of its I don't have time because I'm moving around a lot so I just kind of have to create my own guests I like it I'm gonna do that with this show I'm just gonna play the game play the games with some characters I made up okay and I'll do all the voices yeah like you know what I'm gonna just pull from, you know,

already existing characters. I'll do... I'll have Bane from the latest... From the latest Jane Bond. Try the real Scalapini Batman. Sure, steal one of my characters. Thanks. I didn't know he was a character from your day.

He's not. He's not. Okay, good. He's yours. He's all yours. All right, thank you. Because he could be like, I can name that movie

in two names and then you'll die. I think you just challenged me to a bait-off, dog. You'll be dead before you get to the second name. Well, let's play a little ABCD's Nuts. It's one of my favorites.

This is a game where we spell out a word with movie titles. And we'll start with, since Big Irish Jay is our one returning competitor, we'll start with him and then we'll go to Dave. And today we're gonna spell out Vancouver, because I'm pretty sure that's where I am right now. The state of Vancouver. And yeah!

And we'll start with you, model service. of Vancouver. And, yeah! And, uh... We'll start with you, bottle service. The letter, of course, is V. Van Wilder. Name any movie that begins...

Victory. ...with the letter V. Now, are we sure that's not National Lampoon's Van Wilder? Victory, then. Pele? Yeah. Sylvester Stallone Van Wilder? Victory then. Pele?

Yeah. Sylvester Stallone? Oh, I know it. Victoire? Michael Caine? Yes, Victoire. Did you do a Michael Caine impression? Yeah. I bet you you could. I'd do him as Michael Bane. Try the scallops with cream sauce, Batman.

That's him. Well, if you're going to laugh, I'm not going to do it again. I'm sorry we're laughing at you. I'm so sensitive. Very rude. Okay, oh, and I forgot to mention, Harlan, if you guys, I've written down a movie for each letter, and if anybody matches the movie that I wrote down, then you're the automatic winner.

And I did not say Victory or Ben Wilder. I said Very Bad Things. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Sorry I let you down. All right, that's okay. That's okay. I tried to do Canadian movies, but I couldn't think of a Canadian one.

Well, there aren't any. It begins with the letter V. There are none? They haven't shot any movies here yet. Okay. If you say so. Yeah, they will. Dave, the letter A.

I'm going to pick a local movie. A movie called Are We There Yet? Ice Cube is from around here? Him and his family? Ice Cube and his family live and commute? No, it wasn't his family. What's the plot of that movie? Do you remember?

He bought some kids. Oh, it's a trafficking movie. And they think poor kids that are being trafficked are in the backseat. Are we there yet? I haven't seen it, but I hear, I think they actually come to Vancouver in it. Like they go from Portland to Vancouver. They're like hipsters.

There's Ice Cube and he's got a little cravat. I'm sure, they're black. They probably looked around Portland and said, this isn't for us. Yeah, let's't for us. Let's go to Vancouver where there might be a few more than there are in Portland. Wait, a few more what? A few more black people.

Oh, okay, sorry. Yeah. That guy is Irish. Right? We got some black people here today, right? Yeah, that's so... They're all in Portland. Alright, but are we there yet? Does qualify as an A movie. I picked a Canadian film called Away From Her. Bummer.

Yeah, it wasn't a fun movie. Alzheimer's movie. You get the letter N Harlan just name any movie doesn't have to be Canadian any movie that begins with the letter N yeah you have three seconds that's it yeah hasn't started yet grace period and you're gonna guess it going to guess it? No, if you guess, if you say the same movie I have written down, then you win. But you just need to get a movie to stay in the game. Nightmare on Elm Street. This is always a tough one because it's a nightmare on Elm Street. I know, but I say it silently.

Alright, I'm going to give it to him. I, uh... I wrote, speaking of Sean Connery, never say never again. Nice. Nice. Really, really nice. Borderline special. You're the first person that's ever been impressed

by that aspect of the game. I'm blown away by that. I usually get made fun of. I'm blown the fuck away. I'm going to move up here while you're here. Yeah. Letter C, Big Irish J. Caligula.

You got it? Boom. We got it, right? I'm pretty sure it's THE Caligula. So no one gets confused with those other Caligulas. They were also very sexually active. I went with Canadian Bacon.

Oh. That's kind of the theme that's going on here today. Yeah, it's fun. Oh, Dave. Another Canadian movie. Oh, brother, are we there yet? another Canadian movie Oh Brother Are We There Yet? What was the sequel called to that movie?

Oh Brother Are We Done Yet? Was it Are We Done Yet? Are We Done Yet, yeah. Oh Brother Where Art Thou There, Doug. Oh, okay okay I think another Canadian movie at least filmed here I don't know if it took place here but owning Mahoney with Philip Seymour Hoffman Oh nobody okay now we're back to letter U. U. Wow. Three seconds. Three seconds. Okay. Urging Nelly Furtado. It's That's a big shot right now. I said Underworld.

Oh, yeah, not really. Not Canadian, I don't think, but I couldn't think of it. Does anybody here know a Canadian movie that begins with the letter U? I couldn't find any. Okay. That's what I like about you guys. V. Vacation.

Okay, also National Lampoon's Vacation. Son of a bitch. It's like you have a gift for that. All right, I got to be a little better. Very bad things. Come over there. If you give him the letter N and he doesn't say National Lampoon something, is he disqualified?

Yeah, somebody else said, you have the chance to see a National Lampoon movie. I picked Vampires Suck. Again, I don't know if, I don't think it was shot in Canada. This next one was. Oh, spoiler. Shot here? What? Canada but this next one was oh well spoiler shot here what I guess would you got the letter II

ET the extraterrestrial and his adventures on earth and his adventures in national lampoons of van Wilder I went with theseotica. Ah. Yeah, A. Tommy Goyan. And then one more, R. R. Okay. This might be a Canadian one, actually. Rabid or Rabies. There's an old... Have you heard of that one?

What's it called? I wish there was a movie called Rabid or Rabies. Is it Rabies? They cover all their bases. It's called Rabies. Was that a C called Rabid or Rabies. Is it Rabies? They cover all their bases. It's called Rabies. Was that a Cronenberg? Rabid. It's just called Rabid. Cronenberg and Canadian. Oh, someone make me some French toast.

Did you have that? No, I wrote down Roadkill. It's another Canadian film. Well, lots of animals that get rabies get demented and run into the street and do become roadkill, so I think we both win. Pound it.

Alright, but I'm going to call Dave the winner of that round. Yeah. I'll take it. Especially because you don't really win anything. Doesn't really mean anything. But now we're going to place and build a title. Can I ask one question before we interrupt the flow?

We've been up here, what, about half an hour? Forty minutes? There's a guy in the front row with a picture of a woman licking three penises. And nobody said anything yet. And as the host, why the hell haven't you said anything yet?

Well, because first of all, that's the gentleman's name tag. And secondly, I didn't notice the penises until you mentioned it. What do you think, she was licking three popsicles? I just never really looked too closely at it. And now I can't stop looking at it. That lady is... She looks like she might be enjoying it. Well, at first I thought it was a scene

from Tremors when the worms were eating. A bunch of baby worms trying to get into her mouth? Yeah. And I think that actually might be Kevin Bacon licking them. Well, he started it, don't get mad at me. It kind of looks like she's chewing up some food to feed to the baby penises. But anyway his name is Drew that's why it why. It's a, it's like a belt. Like a UFC belt of penises.

Are you like some kind of penis champion? Why is that in existence? Dude won when he took four penises. I am the king of penises. Probably a rear naked choke. No. Why, why? Why, why?

I wish it wasn't a name tag. I wish you just had a picture you just brought everywhere. It's at McDonald's, you just plops it up. There you go. This is what I need to enjoy my meal. Uh-oh. It's pretty upsetting. Show the crowd so they believe us, Doug. They might think we're just making this up.

Like, why did you... Oh, my God. Like, why did you... Why did you... Why? What is it? Why? You have to put it on.

Why? Why? You have to put it on. Why? Why? You would definitely, if you just wore this walking down the street, no one would bother you. The only person who would really notice is probably Herbert Villashoes. Because it would be at his eye level. You know, I don't, just to get our attention, is that what the penis is for? And this is kind of like a penis, too. We're like local pro wrestlers, and that's our title belt.

Oh, this is your fun belt that one guy has to keep it, because he won, that you have to keep. And then you just threw Drew on there to turn it into a name tag. Good work, Drew. I'm going to go wash up. So who wrestles her? At least three guys. All right, well, so that's one of the name tags you can pick in a little bit after we play some Build-A-Title. Which will start as soon as I find a title we're gonna start

with Dave oh and then we'll go to Jay and then around to Harlan so Harlan gets a chance to acclimate and suggested by littlest Lolo who I think might be here There she is. Woo! She suggested Kids in the Hall Brain Candy. Great Canadian film. So, Dave, you need something that ends in kids or begins with candy. Okay. Which is kind of my slogan.

Life ends with kids and begins with candy. Ah, whoa. Oh, brother. Tough stuff, man. Oh, brother, are we there yet? Yeah, yeah, yeah. End with kids. Something, something, something kids. Or,

candy something, something something kids or candy something something something do you have a brilliant way of stalling stalling oh you know what movie I like what where all the kids All right, you're out. Thank you. All right, I got one. Okay, Jay. Spy Kids.

Yes! It's that easy. Boom! Ladies and gentlemen. Can candy be the last word, or does that... That's going to be the first word, because you're going to add to the title now, Harlan, with a movie that ends with the word spy or begins with the word candy Wow ends with the words what begins with candy I know I have in my head examples of both. They do exist.

I keep freaking out at that Sarah Michelle Gellar standing over there. Because that would be really neat if she came to one of my shows. But instead it's just fake. But it's a pretty cool name tag. Spy vs. Spy? That would be a great movie. They should make that. Based on the Mad Magazine Spy vs. Spy? That would be a great movie. They should make that.

Based on the Mad Magazine cartoon comic, I guess you call it. It was a cartoon, wasn't it? Spy has to be the last word? I think you got me, buddy. You're stumped? Yeah, I'm stumped. That's okay. This game isn't for everyone.

I'd like to say it's for hardly anyone. But some people are good at it. And, uh, Jay... Wasn't there a movie, I Spy? Boom! He said yes, so it means yes. There was, based on the TV series I Spy. Yeah, that's what I was thinking. Bill Cosby and Robert Culp were in the series and in the movie

were Eddie Murphy and Owen Wilson. Yeah, Eddie and Owen. Oh, nice. I like the way you say that. Like, yeah, Eddie and Owen. Yeah.

It was one of their classics. I Spy Kids Candy. I Spy Kids in the Hall Brain Candy. And the other two guys are out, though, so you're our winner, Jay. All right.

Let's talk about the next one. Harlan likes the creepy horror movies and didn't think of Candyman. Candyman. You've seen that, right? I've seen it, yeah. I love that. You say it three times and you get bumblebees on you.

Isn't that what it was? Isn't that what killed me? That or Beetlejuice shows up. Alright, so Jay has a point. Do you guys want to try another one? Yeah. Alright, let's try one more. This was suggested by Hal's Bowels and The Medium Bus and several other people.

Lots of people suggested this title. And I already mentioned it once today. It's Canadian Bacon. So who do we start with this time? Start with Dave. Again? Yeah. Ugh.

Canadian bacon on the air. There you go. Oh, nice. Canadian bacon on air. Beautiful. All right, Jay, what can you add to that? Canadian bacon air up there. One clap and one laugh. The air up there yeah I just thought you were fucking up the

movie up in the air title what is I thought you were making that title. Is that like Up? They're very similar, yeah. George Clooney plays a guy who flies around in planes lifted by balloons. Okay, so we have Canadian Bacon Air, Con Air, Up There. So now Harlan needs a movie that begins with there, or ends with Canadian. Air up, there will be blood.

Yes! And thank God Pete Holmes isn't here right now. Because we would hear Daniel Plainview for the rest of the show. Because we would hear Daniel Plainview for the rest of the show. I'll give you permission to drink that milkshake. And die. Alright, where are we at? What's going on? We're at me.

Doug, Canadian bacon air up there will be blood simple. Yes. All right. Okay, Jay. The American-nadian bacon air up there. The rest of that shit. Nice. The American. We don't have to say the anymore. We can of that shit. Nice. The American.

We don't have to say the anymore. We can take that out. Okay, so we've got Americanadian bacon. There will be blood simple. So, you need a movie that ends with American. Okay. Or, yeah, or part of that word. Okay.

If you feel me. How about The American? That's the movie? That's the one he just said. Oh, he said, oh, that was you? Yeah. I thought you were just in my head.

Has to end in American. Mm-hmm. Okay. American. Mm-hmm. Okay. American. Or begin with simple. Yeah. Yeah. I got one.

You got one? I got one on both. How much? Whoa. Sure. You got one on both? Yeah, you Whoa. Sure. You got one on both? Yeah, you know. That's how I do.

Racist. American werewolf in London. That's a pretty sweet learning curve you have on this game. Right? Ah? Ah? Ah? Ah? Ah? Ah? All right. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

Yeah. Let's make noises for the rest of the show. Who's next? Is Dave next? Yeah. You got something? Can I do Made in America-nadian? Huh.

Yeah. Made in America-nadian? Okay. Yeah. People in the audience think you should be able to get away with that shit. Alright, thank you audience. No, that's a good one. Made in America.

Is that a Ted Danson movie that I'm thinking of? I think so. It's Ted and Whoopi and Will Smith. Ah. Alright. I got two. Alright, Jay. I got one.

I got two. You still have two? Yeah. After all that? Yeah, I think you'd disqualify one, though. After you added made? Yeah. Because one is made. The movie made. And the other? That doesn't count as anything.

Let's talk about the other one. The one that ends with simplicity. Oh, God. Maybe not. Simplicity? Yeah. Simplicity. This is? Yeah. Simplicity. This is a movie.

Simplicity. That's just how we say it in Seattle. Can nobody help him? Who's in Simplicity? Isn't it Michael Keaton? Multiplicity. Who? That's Multiplicity.

But if you simplify it. Simplicity. I know there's a movie called Simplicity. I love that though, that's the first time probably in the history of mankind that the title Multiplicity has been yelled out in anger. I mean except for maybe people leaving the theater after seeing it. But it was intuitive for us. Michael Keaton played many characters. Because it was about cloning or something. All of his clones were like half stupid or half smart. Something like that.

Okay, well I'm going to call Dave the winner of this then. But we got a pretty good one. Alright, alright. Okay. We've made it. But we've got a pretty good one. Made in American-nadian bacon... Bacon-air up there will be blood simple. You should have a disqualifier, though. Like a disqualifier. Like, you ever play Angry Birds?

I'm aware of it. I don't play it. It's a game where you try to use birds to destroy pigs, and if you can't do it, you can press this button and this big giant black crow comes in and wipes everything out. And with your game, you should be able to wipe everything out just by saying the movie Mannequin. Alright, I'm going to take that back to the committee that decides these things, which is me, and I'll get back to you. I don't think it's going to go good for me. Well, let's see. This next game, everybody has a chance in this next game.

It's that kind of game if you play it right. And what we need from the audience right now is to show us your name tags. There come the penises. Most of the name tags have penises on them. And then, oh, look at that. That's a big box right there. Wow. Oh, it's got Gwyneth Paltrow's head in it.

Oh, fuck. And it says this side up. That's nice. Wait, I just got a question. What's in the box? What's in the box? What's in the box? Only he will get that fucking because nobody else can.

Fuck it. What a piece of shit joke. Give me the fucking thing. Nice. Oh, nice. Oh, somebody's got candy. Do we have to pick one? Yeah, just anybody that you like.

I got to take the Death Star. I got to take the Death Star. Come on. Thank you. Death Star with candy in it. Yeah, that's the only way to die. That makes the blowing up of the Death Star. I gotta take the Death Star. Come on. Thank you. Death Star with candy in it. Yeah, that's the only way to die. That makes the blowing up of the Death Star even more tragic. That it had all that candy inside.

Not really, because then the whole galaxy gets covered with peanut butter cups. Oh, Dave Wendgut, Sarah Michelle Gellar. Oh. What's in your weird... Looks like you're just holding a diaper. It will be when I'm done eating. I got cookies. I need a little touch-up.

I got a comb. What about that bag full of stuff is a name tag? It's right here. It's the fucking hole. Oh, that came out of the box. I didn't see the seven box. That's what's in the box. That's what's in the box. That's what's in the box.

It's in the box. It's in the box. I gots. But his name is Kevin? Devin. Oh, Devin, sorry. Is there a name on this? Devin, there you go.

It's inside. Okay, good. I can eat this, right, Devin? Is Buffy, is that the name? Sure. This guy's name is Reese's. Now, if your belt came with actual dicks, I would have fuckin'

Oh God, what a drive. John. There it is. Bonjour, it's in French for me. Ooh. Bonjour, John. Okay. John, alright, I gotta remember that.

But wow, he's really scored with the Reese's minis. Is that part of the thing, you're supposed to have candies? It's a way it worked. It got you to pick it. Dave picked Buffy because, you know, he's lonely and he can go home with that. And, of course,

how did you know? Did you know it was going to be candy in there? Did you pick it? I love the movie Seven. I was like, what is it here? And I was like, I'm fat. There's food. Perfect. And you're eating it right now.

Are there... It's just regular food, though, right? It's not medicated. It's from Subway. Okay. Oh, they make the best cookies over at Subway. That's what I go there for, the cookies. Oh, yeah, I'll have one of those.

And now that belt with the penises on it is just the saddest. No, let's flip it over here you go I thought you should hit earlier I'm gonna say it just cuz I liked it Dennis Miller after 9-11 Pretty good. Pretty good one. Alright, let's do a Let's Play Letter Mall game. Who did I say won the last round? Dave?

Okay, Dave. Dave gets to pick a category, Harlan. Okay, awesome. And just like the other games, we'll go to Jay after Dave, so you have a second to acclimate. Thank you, sir. I think you just say that because you're afraid of dying. I am afraid that you have a tiny Death Star in your hands. You're gonna blow up all of us. Dave? Yeah?

What do you think of these categories? Love em. Ugg ofs oobies. That's movies where someone in the film has had their tongue cut out. Or is deaf That was suggested by Dizman7 And then AtSnitty suggested Mystery movies And mystery movies are movies Where the word mister Is in the title There's quite a few of those as it turns out And then Kylie Petty

Suggested Pig in a Blanket And that's films where Kevin Bacon Has sex pig in a blanket and that's films where Kevin Bacon has sex. With three or less penises. I will take mystery movies. Okay, these are movies that have the word Mr. in the title. Either spelled out M-I-S-T-E-R, or they could be... Oh, my phone's freaking out. Or they could be, you know, M-R period. Got it. Two kinds of misters.

Oh, shit. Alright, you get to pick from two different years. From 1995 or 2007. 2007, please, Doc. You got it. Two and a half stars, Leonard Maltin, for this movie. He says this movie

is about a respected businessman, husband, and father. And he also says that this movie is sometimes laughably absurd. Two and a half stars, 2007. Leonard Maltin lists nine names. How many names do you think you can get it in, Dave? All right. Shumka. I will try to name it in nine names. That was a confident opening bid. I will say eight.

Also very confident. So now, Harlan, you can say seven names, or you can say to Jay, name that movie. And if... You want to say seven? Oh, and if you miss it, you're out for... No, no, you'll still be back in. Okay, I'll say seven.

He says seven, Dave. I'll say name it. Okay. See, that's what happens. That's how it works. I'm going to read off seven out of the nine names from the bottom of the cast list

going up. So you're not going to hear the top two names. That could be a problem. It could be. I mean, am I going to be here on the fucking gaffer is that what it is? they are cast members okay that's fair for the most part and I think you have a shot at this which you gotta keep in mind You have to keep in mind

that the title of the movie has the word Mr. Mr. in it. And it's from 2007. And the clues are probably no help so I'll just give you the names. This is a prominent movie that was in theaters like full release?

Or was it like an Ithaca film festival? Well you do know how much I appreciate full release. Thank you, Batman. Alright, go for it, buddy. How dare you. Alright, here's your seven names. And audience, please don't help him.

I know you're a nice, friendly audience. Lindsey Krauss, Aisha Hines, Danielle Panabaker, him. I know you're a nice, friendly audience. Lindsey Krauss, Aisha Hines, Danielle Panabaker, Ruben Santiago Hudson, Marg Helgenberger, William Hurt,

and third billed person in this movie that has Mr. in the title is Dane Cook. Your co-star from Employee of the Month. I've just narrowed it down. It's not Employee of the Month. Mr. Deeds.

Oh! That could have been one of them. But no, it was... Remember that? It was a serial killer movie with Kevin Costner? Yeah. Mr. Brooks.

Mr. Brooks. Mr. Brooks. What was Mr. Deeds? Mr. Deeds was Adam Sandler in a remake of Mr. Deeds Goes to Washington, right? It'd be nice if that serial killer could find Adam Sandler.

Mr. Deeds. All right, so Dave gets a point. Dave. All right, so Dave gets a point. Dave is winning on behalf of poor Buffy. Sorry, Dave. I do like that it's a standee of Sarah Michelle Gellar, and she's got a sign around her neck that

for Buffy, it's still the caricature of me, but with blonde hair. And a little bit more concern on my face than I normally have and then the heart and the camera because Doug loves cameras and so so does Buffy okay so Jay stayed out of that skirmish so we'll start with Jay this time and then we will move in the other direction towards Harlan's you're coming up next Harlan so listen to these to all the information and give another whack at it There's people laughing at me just when you mention me getting involved

I'm getting a fucking complex Do you not realize I am a Death Star asshole? Okay, Jay, do you want... At DKTASJuicebox... Nice complicated handle. Suggested four more years. And while it sounds like it's a tribute to President Obama, it's actually a sequel that came out four or more years after the original.

Or, at Champs 10274, suggested Hot Pockets, and that's movies that have pool halls in them. Movies with pool halls in them. Movies with pool halls in them. And celebrating a birthday today, actress Rachel McAdams. So the films of Rachel McAdams. Let's go Hot Pockets. Okay. Would you like a movie that has pool halls in it from 1961 or 1986?

Let's go 86. Three stars from Leonard. He calls this movie sharply made and he also says that someone involved in this movie picked up an Academy

Award for their work on this movie. And he lists nine names. I'll say five I'm sorry eight names okay I'll say eight always strategist. Put that roll around your head there, Harlan. Figure that out. Okay, so now we come to you, Harlan.

And he wants all eight names. So you can say seven. That would be a pretty safe bet. I'll name it in one. What? All right, now we've got to go to Dave. Dave could bid zero names. He could go negative names. Oh, I can say zero?

If you wanted to, yeah. You want to say zero? Okay, he says zero now. You know, you can go negative? Yeah, you go... You can go negative names? Yeah, if you know, like... If you're that confident?

Okay, negative one million. We're definitely getting into the gaffer then. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If we're going to name that many. We're definitely getting into the gaffer then. If we're going to name that many. How many... If you know... This is how it works, Harlan. If you think you know the top billed person in the movie, you say negative...

I can name it a negative one, which would mean you'd have to tell me the name of the movie and the top billed person. I could do that. Can you go to two names? Yes, I can do that. Okay, well can you go to two names? Because then you say negative two. I can go to two names. Think you can go to three?

Not three. Okay, so his bid is negative two, Dave. Do you think you can do them in order? Yeah, you have to do them in the right order. Yeah, mm-hmm. Name that movie. Okay, so first of all, what's the name of the film? Color of Money.

And who's the top billed person? Tom Cruise. And who's second top billed person? Tom Cruise. And who's second billed? Paul Newman. That is incorrect! Paul Newman and Tom Cruise, yeah. Paul Newman had been around quite a long time at that point. I know, but his career in Falter taught him a huge start.

And the film was about his character, and Tom Cruise kind of came into his life. I think I was baited. No, I was excited. I thought you were going to pull it off, but that's one of the tricks of the game, unfortunately. No, it's fun. Now it makes me,

I have to dig out of the hole now, which I will do. Oh, no, the game's over. out of the hole now, which I will do. Oh no, the game's over. You lost, my friend. No, no, no. Dave gets a point. We still keep going.

Of course Paul Newman was the top bill. He's the title character. Jeff Culler. Yeah, Tom Lewis plays Bobby Money. Yeah, Tom Cruise plays Bobby Money. Your Death Star's bad luck, dude. Give me the penis belt. I mean, how effective of a Death Star can it be if it's filled with candy? Although, it kills you slower.

Yeah. It kills you eventually. Yeah. Kills you eventually. The diabetes star. So Dave has a point. Jay has a point, but Harlan is, I do feel he's poised for a comeback. Dave's got both of them. He does? You didn't get a point before?

No. I could lie, but he told him to name it both times. Told him to name it? Or did he tell... Yeah. Yeah, he has the him to name it both times. I told him to name it? Or did he tell... Yeah. Yeah, he asked me. I'm not crazy. We went the same order both times?

Yeah. Yeah. Supposed to change the order, you guys. Never again. So really, is Dave the winner? Yeah. Well, why don't I have him? Why didn't I give Jay a point?

Oh, I gave Jay a point. Build a title. That's what's going on. Look at the right part of the paper, Doug. Well, let's play one more for fun. All right. My last chance. that's what's going on. Look at the right part of the paper, Doug. Well, let's play one more for fun. All right. One last chance.

I got that Harlan's getting in the swing of it. Yeah. Yeah, and then back in Los Angeles we'll have you on again. Oh, good. When you're done

making this TV show. But it's going to go for many years, right? Yeah, I hope so. I hope so. It's up to these guys. Y'all got to watch it, damn it.

Hope you like it. That section will watch it. Yeah, I hope so. I hope so. It's up to these guys. Y'all gotta watch it, dammit. Hope you like it. That section will watch it. Package? Package deal. Deal. Yeah. Okay. Now I don't even want to do it anymore.

Thanks for wrecking my career. Came to have a little fucking movie fun, and now I want to join Herve Villachez. No, I'm kidding. All right. Well, you know, Harlan, I'm just as fault here as you are. Wait, you're not at fault at all. But I screwed up the order that time, that's for sure.

But, okay, so this time we'll start with Jay and go to Dave. Oh, yeah. We'll switch the order this time. So you can't do that to Harlan again. I will never hurt you again. What a tender pledge you've just made. Okay, so, Jake. Yes.

The King of Pancakes category. The number one movie ten years ago to this very day at the box office. Or... Ten years is too long? Too hard to overreact that far? Let's go opposite. 10 years is too long to our do-over let's go

opposite in theaters now oh I thought you were going to say in theaters in 10 years it's like how much did you smoke in theaters now movies that are in theaters now or your third choice we were talking about it earlier at Chives the Butler

suggested is Chives the Butler suggested... Is Chives the Butler one of the characters on your podcast, Harlan? Yes, he is. He's wonderful. You can ask him to do things for you. Is he British? He is British. He sounds a lot like Michael Caine.

And Michael Caine's a butler. Yeah. In some movies. He's a lot like Michael Caine. And Michael Caine's a butler. Yeah. In some movies. Batman. So, Chines the Butler suggested you only live 23 times, and that's James Bond movies. Which one would you like to play? Now, 10 years ago, or Bond? You know what, let's go go think about it really hard because

this doesn't matter at all okay in theaters now okay now I don't think Leonard even reviewed that he doesn't he doesn't like those kind of movies, I mean shitty movies. I haven't seen it. It might be great. Okay, so Jay, I'm going to give you some clues. No stars, because when Leonard reviews a movie that's out now, he just writes a hell of a long review on the app and doesn't give it any stars and he says that this movie is this is intimate or here majestic yet intimate that's good that's a good good way to describe it and then he also says about it that it is so memorable like this is a movie when you see it afterwards you're like I saw that

I remember that so again Harlan the clues are terrible that's part of the fun and Leonard lists seven names how many names do you think you get it in, Jay? Let's go three. That's an exciting opening bit. Pick one. Three. Three. My voice, holy shit. Sorry, I just went through puberty.

Three. Dave? Yeah. Majestic, you say, yet intimate? Zero names. All right, Harlan. I ain't gonna want this. Oh!

I'm gonna punch Buffy in the face if you succeed. Not lightly. I won't ruin it or anything. It's in theaters now. I'm going to throw that pumpkin at her. It's in theaters now? In theaters now, yes. Okay, you say negative one.

So we go back over to Jay. I could only do negative one if it's what I think it is. Okay. So name that, Mr. Williams. Name the movie? Yeah, what's the movie called? Cloud Atlas. And what's the number one top-billed person?

Tom Hanks. Both of those answers are wrong. Can I guess? Sure. Was it Lincoln? Yeah, it's Lincoln. Daniel Day-Lewis. It's not out until next week. Damn it Lincoln? Yeah, it's Lincoln. Daniel Day-Lewis. Daniel Day-Lewis, yeah.

Damn it! It's not out until next week. No, no, no. Oh, technicality! I win. I fucking win. Thank you. I fucking win.

Thank you, Lincoln, you asshole. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's out. It's We had to release Lincoln the same day as Twilight, because somebody has to fight those vampires. Oh, shit. Alright, well let's go back in time to a simpler time a simplicity time when Dave was our actual winner

ladies and gentlemen Dave is our winner So whoever wins this lady Hey, give me those penises Let's put those in there They're buffing Whoever with this lady. Hey, give me those penises. Let's put those in there. They're buffing. Um, and uh, so the Death Star doesn't have a shithead on the back of it, right? No, so if you mind coming up here and writing down a shithead for me to share with the crowd here at the end.

And can he keep this or do you want your Death Star back? No, I couldn't take his Death Star. You don't want want it do you want the candy inside no that's i'll take some candy i'll take some candy out awful and is there a on the back of this seven box no no so he has to come up here as well i got something okay did you get something? There you go. Oh, there he goes. Here's your Death Star back.

Where's our winner? And our winner's back up there somewhere. Yeah, come on up here and get your prize. Buffy. So-called Buffy. Thanks, John. I tried, buddy. You're proud of me?

One of the guys even wrote, is this shit out for me? Because I do forget to say that. Oh, there you are. Hi. Is it Buffy? Her name's not Buffy. What's your actual name? Erica. Hey, Erica. Congratulations. Enjoy your prizes. Oh, you're pumpkin, Igor. Hi. Is it Buffy? Her name's not Buffy. What's your actual name?

Erica. Hey, Erica. Congratulations. Enjoy your prizes. Oh, your pumpkin, yes. Almost forgot the pumpkin. And you want Buffy back too, right? Here you go. You can tell your friends that's the pumpkin of a loser. Hey, wait up!

Why is my show just a cult hit? Why didn't those fucking kids like vampires when I was killing them? Totally what she sounds like. You got any road dates coming up, Harlan? Yeah, I'm gonna be at Massey Hall on New Year's Eve in Toronto. Bam! Yeah, come on out if you're in Toronto. Yeah, all these people would be there if they didn't hate Toronto so much. Now they've got a reason to come visit.

Yeah, yeah, that's right. Alright, and Dave, stop podcasting yourself. Yeah, it's called the Harlan Highway. What? Yeah, stop podcasting the Harlan Highway. What? Yeah, stoppodcastingyourself.com for more of me. Do you think

Graham would be better or worse at this stuff than you were today? I won. So worse. Yeah. Yeah.

I meant the whole thing, but yeah, I think you did a terrific job. I agree. I'm very pleased. I'm quite pleased with my decision to have you here. Yeah, ditto.

And what do you got coming up, Big Irish J? You can be seen at Parlor Live weekly. Yeah, Joe Rogan's coming, J.D. Smoove, and other comics coming through there will be there. And then the BigIrishJine's worthless podcast all right thanks guys Thank you for coming out in the rain. Thank you for selling the comedy mix out as of several days ago. I love you guys, and I will definitely be back. And as always, people who think they're a psychic

are a shithead. People who think they're a psychic are a shithead. And Silent Hill is a shithead.