Doug Loves Movies - Jacob Sirof, Dan Telfer, Shane Mauss and Joe Begos guest

Episode Date: September 15, 2016

Live from the UCB Franklin, Doug welcomes filmmaker Joe Begos along with comics Dan Telfer, Shane Mauss and Jacob Sirof to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds With 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies This shit is heavy. Hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is I Love Movies.

Coming to you once again from our original home, all the way back to when this thing was called I Love Movies. The Upright Citizens Brigade Theater Franklin location in Los Angeles, California. It's Tuesday, September 13th, 2016 and I want to see some tags.

Alright, that's a few. I think that those who brought name tags each have about a 10% chance of winning. And my favorite is Abby T. Mostly just because it's the largest one. Yeah, and because she's got fans here. You guys looking for seats? Come on in. Don't be shy. Yeah, come because she's got fans here. You guys looking for seats? Come on in. Don't be shy.

Yeah, come on. Grab a seat. Hey, what's up? Haven't seen you in a while. Oh my god, that's crazy. Hey, I'm going to do some plugs. Doug plugs. Tomorrow night, Oh my God, that's crazy. Hey.

I'm going to do some plugs. Doug plugs. Tomorrow night here in Los Angeles, I'm interrupting Now You See Me 2 at Cinefamily. Yeah, we tried to do it once, but that movie is truly magical. Refused to be screened. So we're trying again tomorrow night.

So come down to see Cocktail. When we can't show now, you see me too. And they say, what else do you want to show? Because last time I said Roadhouse. And so it goes in that order. Roadhouse and then Cocktail are my favorite movies to make jokes during. or Roadhouse and then Cocktail are my favorite movies to make jokes during. They both have

equally great moments where Kelly Lynch's ass moves into the screen and you can go and get a huge laugh. Friday I'm doing stand-up at 4.45 in the afternoon at the Caboo Music Festival. So I don't know who's going to be

at the comedy stage that early on a Friday afternoon. But it's in Del Mar, California, where the turf meets the surf. And where the turf meets the surf, down in old Del Mar. And then next Monday, September 19th Doug Loves Movies is back at the UCB Sunset location At 10.30pm Late show on a Monday You can watch your stupid football

And then come over All of my dates, dates, and links Are at DougLovesMovies.com That's DougLovesMovies.com The prize bag has some stuff in it Your guess is as good as mine Oh, of course douglasmovies.com. The prize bag has some stuff in it. Your guess is as good as mine. Oh, of course. Phil Bill coloring book

is in there. That has to be in there. There has to be a Douglas Movies t-shirt, of course. Also, there has to be every time, I always include a DVD of No Country for Old Men. And every time in the bag is always include a DVD of No Country for Old Men. And

every time in the bag is a napkin from when Roseanne and Tom Arnold got married. In June 23rd, 1991 I was there wearing a yarmulke

against my lord. Oh hey, speaking of the lord, it's never too early for Christmas tree ornaments to be given away on the show. From Scrolling It Out Woodworks, this is a Christmas tree ornament that is that Douglas Movies logo in wood. A little wooden Douglas Movies Christmas tree ornament that is that Douglas Movies logo in wood. A little wooden

Douglas Movies Christmas tree ornament. A few of those left, so those are going to be coming out in the bag every... Oh, what do you know? Another pipe from Peacemaker. I've got so many pipes from Peacemaker you're never going to not hear that word on this show. And also, whatever

my guests brought. So please give a big warm welcome to Joe Bagos, Jacob Searff, Shane Moss, and Dan Telfer. Hot line-up, hot show. Thank you. I almost forgot to mention that I also have from the nice folks at Loot Crate, not just a fucking loot crate,

but Loot Crate DX. Yeah. And I was complaining about how heavy it was. And I'm not going to name names, but one of the panelists said, did it hurt your pussy? He picked it up and he was like, ugh!

It's a shoebox. It's dude. You care. Because that's the best way to prove how heavy something is, is just throw it onto the ground. I can't wait for someone to win those broken prices. Because, like, if... I don't think there's any, like, bongs inside a loot crate.

I mean, maybe it's something to look forward to. But let's take a look real quick. Well, first let's meet our guests individually, and then I'll fuck around with my loot crate. Sitting directly to my left, first-time guest on the show, it's a film director, dare I say horror film director?

Do you like to be categorized as that? I'm cool with that. He's cool with that? I mean, look at him. It's Joe Bagos, everybody. He's got a new film that is currently available on iTunes and shortly will be available on where else? VOD?

It's on all VOD right now. All VOD right now? I hope you guys like it because I got six fucking copies. He brought a stack of copies. I don't know how to distribute them. There's got to be some sort of scientific way that we can do this. Woo-hoo! copies. I don't know how to distribute them. There's got to be some sort of scientifical way

that we can do this. And, you know, just get them to the people that deserve them the most. So the people in the front row. Well, you know, the tall people, the biggest person here just got one. Do you want to throw one, Joe? You brought them.

Sure. Oh, he just took out a light. people. The biggest person here just got one. Do you want to throw one, Joe? You brought them. Oh, he just took out a light. He just took out a light for the listeners at home. The horror film director knocking out the lights and then murdering someone. Darkness is his friend. Oh, they just proved that the lights work by turning him up.

All right, thank you. The Mind's Eye from the director of Almost Human. I love this quote on the... I was going to say something very similar. The quote on the box says, the best scanner sequel we never got. And what I wrote was, dare I call it a faster-aced scanners so yeah so i could have

got on the box if i just been on top of it but uh so we got one for the prize bag right yeah and we got a poster oh and a poster for the prize bag very nice and how do you like do you want to give like a brief i know you probably done a million interviews about your own movie but like what's is it uh electrifying and a retina searing as suggested uh on the back of this uh container uh i don't know i fucking hope so uh it's basically scanners on steroids i guess is the best way to put it right it's a more amped up scanners like because scanners you know when you go back and look best way to put it. Right? It's more amped up scanners. Because scanners, you know, when you go back and look at it, there's only one or

two things actually explode. There's just the threat of people exploding all the time. Yeah, it's actually oddly paced. So I just wanted to make something that didn't have any subtext, which some people dislike, but there's no subtext there. Take the art out of it and let's have some fucking fun. That's my

motto. A lot of shit blows up. have some fucking fun. That's my motto. A lot of shit blows up. We fucking used dynamite to blow up bodies. We flipped cars. We shot it all during a blizzard. It's pretty fucking ridiculous. Can I just say that I am, yeah, go ahead and applaud for that. But also, I'm just really impressed with this panel that everyone is drinking black, scary- looking beers that say Bud Light on the side. I've never had an all Bud Light panel

before. That's all that was in the back. Oh yeah, there weren't any other options, I guess. But still, I'm sitting here with a pussy-ass water. You guys all have beers. Let's meet everybody else in the panel. The rest of these guys, they've all been on

the show before. They're in your top five favorites. I'm not going to say who's better than whom. But let's start with the one closest to me. It's Jacob Searoff, everybody. Hey, what's up? DLMers. Has anybody called them DLMers before? Certainly.

Oh, maybe. I don't like to label them, really, but if we do have to go with something, I like short rounds. I'm looking for a small Asian kid. I don't see one. Do I start talking? Who talks first? You talk first?

I talk first? I don't know where to go with that one. I'll just see if Jacob's got anything else to say about Asian children. You said short round. Huh? You said short round. Yeah, okay. All right.

How do you not? It's a movie reference. Okay. Yeah, and Dan Telfer is here, everybody. Let's say hi to Dan. Hi. He's not going to take us into the race hole. I don't think I will.

No. How are you doing, buddy? I'm doing lovely. How are you, Doug? You know, I'm waiting for your autobiography. Oh, shit. Right? You got to start writing that, dude.

Why? I think you got a story to tell. I've had some shit go down. Right? How much have you talked about in podcast form? Zero? And you like it that way? You like to keep it private?

No, you want me to talk about the cancer? You're pretty open about it in your Twitter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just kick cancer's ass. I'm a cancer too. I'm also a cancer. No, Jacob, you don't understand. He's talking about the disease.

He makes it about himself. And you're talking about a silly... Silly astrology. Sorry. Shut the fuck up, Jacob. If you guys listen to Star Wars... Isn't it crazy? You survive cancer, people still interrupt you.

I've done the Benson interruption, sir. I enjoy being properly interrupted. So, yeah, here's a rivalry right out of the gates. I don't need you backstage. I'm loud. And then I pause. He

you asked me to start a fake. I said, let's fake. Let's fake a Star Wars fight. I said, because we have differing views on Star Wars. We don't even have that different views. We're like this close to the same views. But he loves his terrible views so much. But let's throw a chair or something, is what I was getting at.

Let's make podcast news by throwing a chair. When I was on with Paul Shearer, he threw a chair. It made my career. You can't recreate the magic. It didn't work for Green Day on a chair at me and it made my career. Quote, unquote career. You can't recreate the magic. It didn't work for Green Day on their third album and it won't work for you.

Thank you for the two people. Currpunk. So, these are my complete iTunes AST Records releases plus two buttons and the chemotherapy port wristband I used to wear in case I needed to be revived, and I don't need that shit anymore. Wow. Yeah.

Fuck it. Having it taken out on Thursday. But the wristband thing is holding the buttons onto the CDs. It's beautiful packaging, Dan. Thank you. If comedy doesn't work out for you, just go into packaging of Dan. Thank you. If comedy doesn't work out for you, just go into packaging

of items. Hey, I qualified for Tetris in the Nintendo Power Championships in 1991, so it's about just, you know, having obsessive-compulsive disorder to a crippling degree. That's all that efficiency is, Doug.

Alright, well, I'm gonna remove all the items from this loot crate DX and then we'll see if you can put them all back into the same box. But let's also say hello to Shane Moss, everybody. Hey!

Thanks, guys. Patiently waiting to be spoken to down there. So patient. They already know about me from podcast news and whatnot. I have a 65 city tour with a show about psychedelics that I'm doing this year. And I have some key chains with a DM DMT stamp that say have a good trip. And I also

have a coloring book that's weird. I didn't think that was going to happen. It's an adult coloring book based on parts of my act. And so yeah, that's my thing. Someone here tonight is going to have one of the largest adult coloring book collections

in the world by having two of them. And that's a pretty sweet deal. And you've got like a big tour coming up, Shane? 65 cities, yes. What? So everywhere in the U.S. Do you have a day off here and there?

Not really. I have a couple days off in New York around Halloween, a couple days off for Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's off and then busy through January. And so there's like a web address people can go to get all the dates? Because we can't list all 65 dates.

No, I wouldn't expect that. What's the kickoff show? It's Flagstaff, Arizona. What's closing night? It is Flagstaff, Arizona. What's Closing Night? It is... I don't know yet because we just extended it. What's the Midway show? Go to shanemoss, M-A-U-S-S dot com and just click on the Good Trip Tour

and you'll have all the information that you need. All of it will be there. All of it. I didn't do prizes. Sorry. Order the what? Coloring book. Yeah.

Yes. Thank you for asking. You can go to my store and order the coloring book. Mrs. Moss, ladies and gentlemen. Mrs. Moss. Stunned by Ramin Nazer,

by the way, who's a fantastic comedian and artist. Yeah, he's got a lot of cool books out too. He's awesome. Yeah, he has his own stand at Meltdown Comics. He's very talented.

Alright. I'm cool with that. I should do my prizes, Doug. Yeah, what'd you bring, Jacob? I brought a copy of the Dark Knight Rises screenplay, which is pertinent to the show, because, you know, of a certain characterization. Oh, let me see it.

I'll read a line from the script for everybody. I did a thing also. As you know, it was written by Christopher and Jonathan Nolan, but the story was by Christopher Nolan and me. I don't know if a lot of people knew that. You can see right there, it says Jacob Seraphin. You just wrote it in. No, I didn't. Are you kidding?

That's like an artistic choice that the publisher made. Now, no matter what line you read, Doug, you have to say it in a certain voice. This is Miranda. Even before you became a recluse, you never came to these things. Classic line from the movie. Everybody knows that one. And also I brought,

in keeping with the DC thing for some reason, my daughter donated this, my almost 12-year-old daughter. It's a Harley Quinn. Everybody hated the movie, and I know we talked earlier on another episode about me taking my children to see that movie, which some people thought was a questionable decision, but it inspired art and prizes. But she drew this,

I dare say, very sexy drawing of Harley Quinn. I mean, she got the body thing going pretty good there, right? No thigh gap on that Harley Quinn. No, well, you know. Thigh gap is overrated. No, that's really, that's, look

at that. Somebody's going to win that. Put it up on your refrigerator and if cops ever come over, that'll be that. Somebody's going to win that. Put it up on your refrigerator and if cops ever come over, that'll be that. Someone else take it. I don't want to get in trouble. Great prizes. Oh, shit. Loot crate. Shit.

You're having such a hard time opening that. It's such a big goddamn loot crate full of stuff. There's a handsome Jack mask. Oh, fuck yeah. Borderlands. Yeah. There you go. I knew somebody here would know what these are about.

There's a cool little Deadshot figurine thing. But that's not Will Smith, though. That's a little tiny alien man. I think that's Will Smith. It's the character from the movie. That's not what he looks like in real life. That's a Brandon from the movie.

I know, but he never looks like that in the movie. Did he not wear a mask at some point? But this is a little baby dead shot. No, I saw the movie. This is a little baby alien shot. I should know. I saw the movie. This is a little baby alien dead shot. Oh, shit. A belt?

Because, you know. You got to turn the loot crate for all your greatest new fashion items. It actually looks kind of cool. I don't know.

It would look really nerdy on, I bet. But it's a suicide squad belt with all of the characters' faces on it. Oh, some perfume by Paco Rabanne. Why would that be in

Loot Crate, you guys? You completely fell for that. Deadpool. It's a Deadpool aviator with case. Can someone dig into that? I just realized it wasn't the clone. Oh, this is really nice. This is why this thing is so fucking heavy.

It's a really nice hardcover Preacher Book One inside there. This is, like I said, now I can't put everything back in now that I've unboxed it, but I gotta say... Look at these fucking sunglasses! Whoa, those are actually pretty nice! Pretty cool

Deadpool sunglasses, so I'm gonna hang on to those. But the rest of this... And the case is really nice, nice too Holy shit I wonder if these glasses are A Loot Crate exclusive They are? Oh my god

I really am in the 50s Who's the lady that's answering? I'm not fucking around, I'm keeping these I'm still doing it though It's working There's this muttering voice up there these. There's this muttering voice up there. We'll see who wins and I'll decide if they get the

Deadpool glasses. You'd probably only get those with the DX. Yeah, I would think so. I'm going to sign up. I've been thinking about signing up for Loot Crate. I'm going to go Loot Crate DX for sure. That's a good box. If you stop giving them away, it's like you signed up.

Damn it, Dan. Why do you have to? It's the children that point out the simple... What else we got to do here? Oh, what movies have you guys seen? What was the last movie you saw, Shane Moss? I saw Don't Breathe yeah it was like

you sure it wasn't don't think twice it was uh no it was don't it was don't breathe it was like it was a decent uh horror it made me like jump a bunch and stuff i don't know the story was like fine enough it was it did it did the job and then i saw, I keep forgetting the name of it, but I didn't care for it, but everyone else in the theater did. Hunt for the Wilder people. You didn't like that? I thought it was like, it seemed

like something that you could show at a nursing home and they would love it. And then it was like, and I saw it in Portland. Like the cocoon too that was never realized? Yeah, I don't know. It was real cute. And I thought that it was like, I saw it in Portland and it seemed like a lot of people that thought what they were watching was some very smart comedy.

And I thought it was a little weak myself. But I hate watching comedy in theaters. I only went because I was with a group of people. Oh, okay. We'll open with that next time. And then we'll discount your entire opinion. Yeah, yeah. All right.

Fair enough. I don't like because people... I saw this in a theater, the most irritating way to see a film. People were there. I felt my money go into the people who made it. If I watch a comedy in the theater, people laugh at parts that I don't think are funny, and then they don't laugh at parts that I think are funny,

and it annoys me. I felt the same way when I saw City Slickers. That's the moment when I realized that people will find things funny that I don't think are funny. I think there's lots of things in City Slickers that are funny, but the first time I saw it, people were laughing way too hard throughout. Just at the idea of

middle-aged white men getting on horses was so fucking hilarious. They're hard to ride. They really take a lot of moments of learning to figure out how to sit on a horse. Sometimes you get on them backwards. It's crazy.

If I were making the movie. Dad? I fell off a horse once. Was that the question? Yeah, you're right. Let's go down the panel. Who's fallen off of a horse? I don't know why my city slicker joke

bombed worse than the Asian joke did. I don't get why that happened. Just to bring it back to that. I don't even know why the Asian joke was surprising. I mean, it's a short round. I just found it a little offensive so that's all I was just

what was the last movie you saw Dan? the last movie I saw did not involve a joke the audience doesn't like it was Popstar never stopped

stopping the Andy Samberg vehicle I finally saw because as you know I have children so I have to wait until it's on VOD very fun movie right? I loved until it's on VOD.

Very fun movie, right? I loved it. It's fantastic. Should have made more money. It was the MacGruber of this year, I think. Yeah, but also you get to see Mariah Carey making fun of herself, which I didn't think was genetically possible. Oh, she can do it

if she thinks it's the right thing to do. She still doesn't have any sense of humor at all. No, she can do it if she thinks it's the right thing to do. She still doesn't have any sense of humor at all. No, but it was funny! She did it in a movie in context and stuff. It was great. I laughed at it. It's good. I enjoyed that movie very much.

I like when comedies work out, especially in the theaters and such. Jacob? Dan, everything I do in my life involves a joke that the audience doesn't like. But the last movie I saw was Kubo and the Two Motherfucking Strings, and that shit was amazing.

Whoa! In the ads, they just say Kubo. Is that why? No, no. Because they're trying to hide the fact that motherfucking strings is in there? Yeah, I saw it in DC. Not as many as you'd think.

It's a great movie. It was beautiful. People brought tomatoes. It's like 110% on there. I cried three times. Really? Yeah, three times. The last time, kind of violently.

Like samurai crying. I'm suspicious of that movie because it looks amazing, but Matthew McConaughey plays like a water bug that you find in your toilet. In fact, I didn't even realize it was him until after the movie, even though I knew who was in it. I couldn't place a voice. I was like, who is that guy? And he did a really good job.

Also, my favorite part about the movie, start a small Asian boy. Sorry, had to. Whoa, you got an applause break for that. Well, I started it. I don't know if it counts when you start your own applause break. You know what I really like?

Jaws. Favorite Bond villain. Is he really your favorite Bond villain? No, of course not. No. Which one, if you had to pick? She's like heartbroken that he's not really your favorite villain. He's definitely the worst GoldenEye 007 Nintendo 64 character to play

because he's too fucking tall and he's a big target, am I right, everybody? Oddjob's a little harder to hit. I think I like... Exactly. I think I like Scaramunga, though, if I had to pick. Oh, Scaramunga. This is Christopher Lee, and he's got the cool gun. Yeah, with the golden gun.

Yeah, the gun he puts together. It's not the best Bond movie, but it's a really cool Bond movie. I like parts of that, and Nick Knack is a fun little sidekick. He's a fun little guy. Yeah, he gets hung from a fucking, you know, on the mast on the ship at the end. It's a good laugh. That wasn't offensive to the little people at all.

Look at this little person. He won't ever just kill himself. That's what Herve Villachez killed himself, you guys. Sorry to bring everybody down. Did you hear about Tom Hanks? Guys, Dan beat cancer. Dan beat cancer, everybody. Did you hear about Tom Hanks? He's got to get the Dan beat cancer, everybody. Did you hear about Tom Hanks?

He's got to get the energy back up. Tom Hanks didn't beat it, though. I think if you're talking about that, you're just supposed to refer to him as if his name is Philadelphia. Mr. Philadelphia didn't beat it. Tom Hanks killed himself yesterday, and it's still not out in the news

because people are so concerned about Hillary's health. Philadelphia didn't beat it. Tom Hanks killed himself yesterday and it's still not out in the news because people are so concerned about Hillary's health. She didn't smile when she coughed. Boo. Joe, have you been to the movies lately? Yes. The newest movie I've seen, actually it was on VOD but it is theatrical, I'm Not a Serial Killer

was fucking awesome. Oh yeah, with Christopher Lloyd. Yes. That's a pretty cool movie. Yeah, it's really fucking crazy. It's shot on 16mm. He plays a super crazy role. And it's like he's not a day player.

He's actually in the entire movie. It's really awesome. Yeah, it's a really interesting turn for him. He's usually lovable and likable or a fun villain, but in this he's straight up creepy. Have you seen it?

I saw it at the Bruce Campbell Horror Film Festival, which I got to see a lot of crazy shit. I don't want to talk about it. shit. Yeah, I don't want to talk about it. Alright, well this is the part of the show where I say, let the games begin. Gentlemen,

pick your name tags. Lots of good name tags to choose from. All you gotta do is go grab one and bring it back to your seat dan serious do it as loudly as possible and while you guys do that we'll do this we'll be right back hey everybody there aren't any ads in this episode so i'm going to run down some of my upcoming personal appearances for you starting with this friday i'm doing stand-up at 4 45 in the afternoon at the Caboo Music Festival

in Del Mar California where the turf meets the surf joining me will be Jacob Serov so come by wherever they do the comedy early on Friday afternoon it's the first day of the festival and see me and Jacob at 4.45. Then on Monday, Doug Loves Movies is back in Los Angeles at the UCB Sunset location at 10.30 p.m. A nice, fun, late start for those of you who are into watching the Monday Night Football. for those of you who are into watching the Monday Night Football. Speaking of football, the Houston Texans, they won their first game, right? I'm going to be in Houston for a special happy hour show on Friday, September 30th at 4.20. You've got to skip work or not have work to come by, but I'd certainly like to see you there. skip work or not have work to come by,

but I'd certainly like to see you there. And then another Doug Loves Movies taping is happening the next day, October 1st, in Dallas, Texas, at Hyena's, and it looks like that's going to sell out pretty soon. So get your tickets for that on October 3rd. You know what October 3rd is, you guys? It's Mean Girls Day, so I have to interrupt Mean Girls at CineFamily in Los Angeles.

October 8th, Wilbur Theater in Boston. October 15th, The Comedy Zone in Charlotte, North Carolina. These are all at 420 on Saturdays. Tacoma, Washington on Saturday, October 22nd. Then I'm doing a Thursday night. Doug loves movies at comms comedy club in San Francisco on October 27th. I'm back at the woman's club in Minneapolis, in Minneapolis, Minnesota on November 5th.

And Gramercy theater, the 12 guests of Christmas sold out. So come to the, a regular Douglas Movies taping at the Gramercy Theater which will also be a lot of fun maybe as many as 5 or 6 guests and that's on November 27th

alright enough of me yakking back to the show alright we're back Joe Bagos picked Alex Eection, Alex-tion. Where's Alex at? Alexa. Oh, your name's Alexa?

Yeah. All right. All right. But good job. You got picked. You got Reese Witherspoon And then your face Is in her mouth Yeah

You know how it is Jacob Who are you playing for? I'm playing for Abby T Or is your name Abby or Abbott? Abby T

Abby T And it says Limited release At Nerd Melt Showtimes Showtimes 420 420 is singular Abby T. Abby T. The extraterrestrial. Limited release at Nerd Melt. Show times. Show times 420. 420 is singular.

But those are the show times. 420. It was a rush job. I actually picked you for effort. It was a rush job? I thought everyone else just had like 8 by 10 printed up pieces of paper from their computers. I thought this was actually...

It's a large rush job. There's like foam core involved. Yeah, you did a good job. I'm proud. Dan? I have a VHS copy of Independence Day. Oh. But instead of Penn, it's got like a label maker printed out the name Ben.

Independence. Independence Day. Independence Day. Because he did it on the sides, too. At the top. At the top, yeah. He fucking... Thorough. He the top, yeah. He fucking... Thorough.

He was like, you know what? I guess he doesn't own a copy of Bend It Like Beckham. Oh my God, that would have been so much better. Yeah. And then on the back, he's got some shitheads, I should say right now, right? No. No, don't do it!

Great choice. I have Euro Dreams of Drushi. Yeah, that's one of my favorite documentaries of all time. It's about how being really good at stuff is way overrated and not worth it. You forgot to put Ben on the inside of the actual tape, goddammit. When is your attention to detail

going to improve, Ben? Take it back. I would trade it in disgust, but I'm tired. Alright. So, I got some games planned for you guys. I hope you all enjoy it.

Why are you clinging to that box? Because I'm using it as a desk. Because I got some writing to do. While you guys are playing these games, I'm going to do some writing. It's adorable, though. It's like you really can't let go of those Deadpool sunglasses. You're clinging to it all tight like a fucking Harry Potter goblin.

I'm giving the box. I'm going to give up the box. Don't you worry about me giving up the box. Alright, this first game we're going to play is called Live, Die, Repeat. I'm going to say the name of a motion picture. The first person who repeats it back wins.

It's too hard. There can only be one winner. Okay, here we go. He's going to start saying it. What's your question, Jacob? You're going to say the name of a movie and then someone's going to repeat it as fast as they can.

Yeah, first person who repeats it wins. All right. I'm going to watch all your mouths. Joe's is the hardest to find. Is that a movie? Never mind. Suicide Squad. Suicide Squad!

Thank you Thanks for agreeing that I clearly won that everybody That sounded like A sting you'd hear during the movie Let's go Suicide Squad Suicide Squad This is not a real game Alright Shane is the proclaimed winner squad! This is not a real game. Alright, Shane is the proclaimed winner on that one.

Good job, Shane. Thanks. How many points did I get for that? No points. You just get to go first to the next game. It's a slight advantage, not a big deal. Alright.

This next game is called Last Man Stanton. Now, on last night's show that no one here has heard yet because we're backed up a day on our shows, there was a gentleman in the audience with the fun

Twitter handle Jews and Reviews. And he when Last Man Stand came up, he suggested Giovanni Ribisi. So we burned him alive.

And somehow he survived. And he's back again tonight are you here tonight Jews Jews and reviews oh you're in two minutes day hilarious all right so all What have I done? All right, so Ben... Can you explain the Jews and Reviews handle? It's something to do with he is, in fact, Jewish, and he reviews movies. Is that right? Got it.

So why Jews? Why the... Why Jews? How many Jews? He has family, goddammit. Two Jews? What did you say say six million, Ted? Or somebody in the crowd said that, I think.

Or maybe it was the voice in my head that makes jokes that the audience doesn't like. Alright, Mr. Reviews. He wants another chance and I'm giving it to him. I don't know why I do this so repeatedly. I give people a second chance.

What have you got that's better than Giovanni Ribisi? Well, now I have a stake in it, so I'm switching it up. You're switching it up? I didn't tell you to go with your gut, kid. These Jews are so shifty. Shane! Ben Affleck.

What? Ben Affleck. Ben Affleck we're going with. Ben Affleck.? Ben Affleck Ben Affleck we're going with Ben Affleck so Shane gets to start then we'll go Dan, Jacob, Joe and me

we're just gonna name Ben Affleck movies if you can't think of one you're out and you can use your one time you can use a lifeline

you can use the person whose name tag you chose as your lifetime lifetime lifeline just once. All right. At any point in the proceeding. So use it strategically. You guess wrong, you're out.

Starting now? Shane. Batman vs. Superman. Ben Affleck movie. Go. Batman vs. Superman. Any Ben Affleck. Now, you stepped right into a trap early on, so it's good that we can explain it right away.

You've got to do the full title. Oh. And that wasn't the full title? I don't think it was, but then again, I'm not here to help you. I... Really? I just thought that was the final. I'm against you.

All right. You can switch it to something else. Or you can go to your lifeline. I can switch it to something else? Well, then I will go with... I'm all of a sudden blanking because I'm shocked that that's not the name of the movie. I'm going with Good Will Hunting.

Full title, please. Dan? I think we've got to go Gigli, Doug. Okay. Suicide Squad. Jacob says Suicide Squad. Phantoms. Wow, that's a...

I would have pocketed that one for later. Also, if I were any of the other three players, I probably would have said Superman vs. Batman Dawn of Justice. Is that the real title? were any of the other three players, I probably would have said Superman versus Batman Dawn of Justice. Is that the real title? No, it's Batman versus Superman Dawn of Justice. I was wondering about that too. Are you sure it's Batman first?

I don't. I've never known which one is first. It's also Batman V Superman. Well, yeah, if you want to get real crazy. I didn't know we were playing like that. Title's longer than the movie. What does the V stand for? Versus?

This isn't like a side game. Vegan, I think. Menus in Los Angeles usually means vegan. It's my turn now, right? Some people just call it BVS. Alright. Daredevil. D-O-J.

Daredevil. Dan. Argo. Fuck yourself. Thank you very much. I'm going to go with my favorite Ben Affleck movie, Reindeer Games. The Town?

Oh, this is how we're going to play it? You guys are going to be all good at it? Dazed and Confused. Chasing Amy. Mall Rats. Whoa, knocking them down dogma oh jersey girl oh god damn it once that can get opened holy crap Holy crap I gotta You know what you guys

I'm gonna go a different route I'm gonna be changing lanes Jay and Silent Bob's Revenge Jay and Silent Bob's Strike Back Whoa That was vicious I didn't even have time To kick him out

For getting it wrong So Sorry Shane You'll be back In the next game Jacob Shit I just had one And I lost it

He only He's only made about 57 movies so It's a difficult one Oh oh there's that one where he that's the one i'm trying to think of doug you son of a bitch um god damn it that's crazy. I know. Can I tap out? No, no, no.

Not until you make me. Oh, I'm going to make you. As soon as I think of a Ben Affleck movie, I'm going to make you tap out. Wait. There's so fucking many. Goddamn, that's great. That's insane.

I can't believe you're letting me take this long. I can't believe it either. Can I just say another one and eliminate everybody else? No. What happened? What was that one? Yeah, use your lifeline. Good call. Can I just say another one and eliminate everybody else? No. What happened? Wi-Fi. What was that one? Yeah, use your Wi-Fi. Good call.

I can't believe I'm doing this early, but Abby T. Abby, what do you got, Abby? I'm phoning home, Abby T. What's up? You got nothing? You got nothing? Guy next to you whispered one in your ear. No.

No. Yes. Yes. Do you still want me on there? Yeah. next to you whispered one in your ear? No! Yes, yes, yes. Do you still want the answer? No. No, I want to lose the game, Abby. It's cheating. Gone Girl.

Okay, I'll go with Gone Girl. Why did we not come up with Gone Girl? That's pretty crazy. Thanks, guy with phone in his sock. That's not creepy. in his sock. That's not creepy. I think I just thought of one though. Joe, do you have

another one? Armageddon. Oh, of course Armageddon. Oh, that God damn it. Oh shit, I just forgot the one

I thought of. I remember the one that you were talking about when he plays a guy who does a thing. the one he plays a guy who does a thing. Oh, he plays a guy who does a thing? Oh, man. Oh, fuck. Oh, shit.

I've got like a couple of movies spinning around in my head where I see him in there, but... I'm going to tap, in the interest of time. Really? Well, how about motherfucking Elektra? Oh, he shows up in Elektra? Yeah, bro. Okay. It's like the only thing that made the two people see it.

I just thought of it again, the one that I had and then I lost, but that's cool. Jacob? That happened to me too, and that is Pearl Harbor. Whoa! That's a big one. Argo? Argo already came up. I already did Argo.

Yeah. Settle down. Sorry, I have one gear. I apologize. I said, I go! I go! Did I mention

I never actually went to chemo? I just yelled at my tumor for like nine weeks. I've been sitting on this cancer joke that's just going to bomb

the whole show. If things get bad enough, I'll spring it up. Oh, that's exciting. Nice tease. Do you got another one, Joe? I do not. Right? We're at the end of the rope here. Oh, yeah. You want to use your lifeline?

I was going to say gone, girl. She was gonna say Gone girl You've got all this time To look on your phone No don't look on your phone That's cheating Directed

Can you direct Oh if you could direct Oh sure He could have directed one But we already did Gone baby gone There you go Gone baby gone

With directing counts Yeah directing counts Without being in it Yeah sure Gone baby gone Producing doesn't fucking count. Are we just saying KCF-like movies? Is that what's happening?

Gone, baby, gone, girl. No, I'm going to take it. Dan? What you got for me, Ben? School ties. School ties! School fucking ties! Yikes. School fucking ties. Yikes.

That's impressive. Jacob. Just do your cancer joke and admit you lost. I wish I would have thought of that without you saying it. I could have just done it. Give me a sec. Don't worry, guys.

I'm going to do the cancer joke at some point. I can see some tension on your faces. He's not going to do it. No, I'm going to do it. My arm is bleeding because I scratched a zit or something. Don't worry. I don't have arm hair cancer. You just have blood next to me, that's all.

It's not a big deal. Hey Shane, you want to do my show tonight? There might be blood next to you. Oh, can I? It's the sequel to There Will Be Blood. There might be blood next to you. There's a strong possibility there will be little might be blood next to you. There's a strong possibility there will be little bits

of blood next to you. I may ask for some of your milkshake. I am not even at all sure he's in it, but I'm going to say... Go for it. JFK, I know it.

You're going to say it. No, was he in Mystic River? Mystic River? No? Everybody sure River? No? Everybody sure no? You know? Pretty sure. That was Sean Penn, right?

He directed it. It had a real gone, baby gone. I think it was Casey Affleck was in it or something. I think Casey might have been in it. Sure, all right. Settle down. Everybody quiet. Well, guys, you know my mom almost beat cancer.

That's not a joke. That's the whole joke? My mom almost beat cancer? Yeah, she died of cancer. Yeah. Yeah, it was a a joke. That's the whole joke? My mom almost beat cancer? Yeah, she died of cancer. Yeah. It was a dark joke. I kind of liked it. Thanks, man.

I mean, it's not like the kind of thing you announce, but if I would have figured out a way to work it in. It would have been so perfect if the first time Dan said, I just beat cancer, you said, my mom almost beat cancer. I know what I said. I wanted to say it, but I couldn't. There's no Kleene say shooting everywhere in my well you can't see it from there but that's

yeah there's a little weird your OCD is way worse than mine dust particles that have touched his blood I'm trying to focus on the cancer joke Joe you should be filming this there's like gore happening it's the worst telekinesis movie ever I've got a small red spot on my arm. I know, and Shane is super uncomfortable.

It won't stop slightly bleeding. I literally scratched a hair follicle. You can bleed. It's all right. Oh, my God. That might be the most Jewish thing ever said. I didn't get cancer because a bum ran up to me and vomited blood in my face or something.

Oh, God, he's got that one. Well, that was what I was going to ask next. I was kind of worried if that's how cancer works. No, buddy, it's not. I've noticed the crowd's really into the cancer stuff tonight. There's a vibe. Do you guys want to play another game? Is that one?

Yeah, I fucking killed that one. I was the last one to get one right, right? So I win? Yeah. I think I'm still in it, right? Yeah, we're still doing this thing. Holy shit. I lost interest in this game, but it's still going.

All that blood. Yeah, that blood really threw me off. So little blood. Yeah. So whose turn is it? Joe? Yeah. Do unreleased movies count?

That's always a real tough point to... Because Ben Affleck is the accountant. Right. Oh, that's like in a week or two it's coming out. I will accept it. Oh, shit. Geely 2, more Gobble Gobble, please. Went straight to video.

Incorrect. Son of a bitch. What was the name of the... When he played Jack Ryan? Clear and Present Danger? Some of All Fucking Fears. Yeah, they were ready with that. They were poised with that one. That one was locked and loaded.

All right, so Dan is our official winner of that game, but what else did we miss? Smoke and Aces. No, Joe won. Joe won. I'm sorry, Joe won. Hollywood Land is the one I thought of too late. Paycheck.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer. What? Really? Ben Affleck is in Buffy the Vampire Slayer? I will ruin you. So he was in Buffy like... He's in Field of Dreams. This is...

I cannot stand this. I don't feel bad about any of these so far. Usually there's all these ones that make you feel bad for not getting them. Yeah, right. These were all pretty crazy. Like, Some of All Fears is probably the biggest one, and I wouldn't have remembered that. Yeah, it wasn't on deck for me. Yeah, I was thinking of Surviving Christmas with the clumps.

Wow. Christmas with the clanks. How do Jews and Reviews review Surviving Christmas with the clumps. Wow. Christmas with the clanks. How do Jews and Reviews review Surviving Christmas? One star David. He did burn it. One star David. I can't believe

that just happened. You're fucking welcome, dude. Just stop doing the show all together. It's not going to get any better than that. I don't know how late we started, so I don't know how late we can go. But I'll ballpark it.

I think there's an 11 o'clock show, so. Okay. So, wait. Yeah, but my show has to be shorter because the earlier show went longer? I don't fucking know. Why are you asking Dan? Why did I become manager of the UCB all of a sudden?

Because you came in with what time the next show was going to start. I thought I was being awful. You came forward with information, so you're the man. So I'm daddy now. Dan's lost a lot of blood. He doesn't know what he's talking about.

All right. So since Joe won that last game, he gets, we'll play one more game. And he gets, he gets a leg up in that game because he gets one point just for winning the last game. Yeah. Oh snap. Oh snap is right. I'm writing it down. Alright, it's done. Here's the game. It's called Jason and Deb's IMDB game.

Yes. Taking the country by storm. You guys buzz in with your own names. I'm gonna list somebody's top four on their IMDB page, the things they're most known for according to IMDB. And, of course, IMDB. And as always. Wait, DB Cooper?

Holy shit. I am just DB. No Cooper. I forgot what I was saying. I'm going to have to start over. Something about DB Sweeney. My name is Doug, and I love movies. Doug loves movies.

If you jump in on the first title, be careful, because there's lots of people in each movie, and if you guess wrong, it's negative one point. But for every remaining title in the top four, you get to guess and get an additional bonus point. Any questions? Good.

No, seriously. Any questions? That went too fast. No, sounds good. Alright. Buzz in with your own name. That's the toughest part for people. They just yell out the name of the answer instead with your own name. That's the toughest part for people. They just yell out the name of the answer instead of their own name. Who's top four on INDB starts with The Godfather?

I like your patience. Or all the microphones went out. Next title, Misery. Jacob. Or all the microphones went out. Next title. Misery. Jacob. Jacob. It would be James Caan.

James Caan is correct. Jacob and Jacob alone can name two more James Caan projects in his top four on IMDb for two more bonus points. He had a really disappointing career, so it shouldn't be that hard. He's known for that. I made $8,000 last year. I can't roast James Caan on a fucking podcast, really.

James Caan listens to this podcast. I hope so. We can get a feud going, because Dan won't start a fake one with me. I need traction. I'm get like a feud going because Dan won't start a fake one with me. I need traction. Okay, what, I'm going to say thief. And?

Was that correct or you're not telling me yet? I don't tell you yet. Okay. And let's go with bottle rocket. Both of those are incorrect. Okay. He was on a television program called Las Vegas.

Wow. And he was in the runaway smash holiday hit Elf. How many stars of David did Elf get? Two. Two stars of David for Elf. Well-loved movie. It's not as fun to go back to once you know the stars of David part. Right, well, I guess

the Jews are just stingy with their Stars of Davids. He didn't say the word Star of David. I think if he'd said two Stars of David, we would all have gotten back into the groove. You know what I'm saying? Yes, I do, Stella. Joe has one point, and Jacob has one point.

Here we go. Whose top four starts with Spartacus? Second film, Paths of Glory. Jacob. Oh, shit. It always sounds like Jacob

and then someone else just making a noise. Jacob. Oh, shit. It always sounds like Jacob and then someone else just making a noise. Jacob. Kirk Douglas. That's correct. Two more Kirk Douglas projects. About 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea and Tough Guys.

Final Countdown. The Final Countdown. And 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. guys. Final countdown. The final countdown. And 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. Well done. How's the Gloria Stanley Kubrick movie? Not that well known. They're both Stanley Kubrick movies. Spartacus? No, Spartacus, yeah.

I didn't even think of that. I don't count Spartacus. I know we did it, but... All right, we're playing four rounds. Jacob has three, Joe has one. Two rounds left. Tiebreaker if necessary. No.

You never know. Jacob's really running away with this. I don't know what's going on on the other end down there What kind of drugs are you on Shane? Zero drugs I think that's the problem Speaking of Jews Wait That lady said aye aye aye

That's Jewish? That's pretty Jewish Are you Jewish? Of course you are Look at her Jew face Yeah, she sure did. That's Jewish? That's pretty Jewish. Are you Jewish? Yes. Are you Jewish? Of course you are. You're Jewish. I mean, look at her. Look at her Jew face.

I feel like does the crowd not know I'm Jewish? I feel like that was obvious. That's why I can make jokes about small Asian people. I've bought enough of their food. But I've earned the right. All right. Enough of their food and their women. Here we go. Whose top four starts with

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid? Dan. Oh, he's taking a swing at it. What do you got, Dan? Paul Newman That is correct 50-50 50-50

That's my one It could have been Other actors from that movie It could have been Richard Keel The aforementioned Jaws Was he in that? Yep

He's the one that Butch Cassidy Kicks in the nuts When they're gonna have A fair fight And he just First thing he doesch Cassidy kicks in the nuts when they're going to have a fair fight first thing he does is just kick them in the nuts alright Dan got a point for that but now he gets to name three more Paul Newman movies

in hopes of getting three more bonus points and taking the lead go Dan Cool Hand Luke, Slapshot, and Hudsucker Proxy. Wow, you really ripped those out there in a confident manner. And only one of the three was correct. Yeah, Cool Hand Luke matches up. They went with, yeah, give them some applause for that.

They also included The Sting and Cars. Cars, probably the greatest legacy of the Paul Newman. Either that or the popcorn. Either Cars or popcorn. Air out the room after bringing that movie up. Jesus. Alright, so

that means that Dan is close behind Jacob now with two points. Jacob has three. Joe has one. And Shane, thanks for coming by. Oh, buddy. Appreciate having you here. And this is the one where you've got to really jump in early if you've got a feeling for it. So far we have James Kahn, Kirk Douglas, Paul Newman.

Whose top four on IMDb starts with overboard? I heard somebody mutter an answer that might be right. You know I don't like hearing those right answers. You yell out something dumb, I'm fine with it. You know the right answer. Keep it to yourself. Nobody's jumping in. Here we go.

Death becomes her. Jacob. That would be Goldie Hawn. That is Goldie Hawn. Jacob securing the win outright with that move. But do you want to guess three more just for fun? Yeah, I'd like to.

It was Overworld, Death Becomes Her, Seems Like Old Times, and Foul Play. Wow. Really? Very thoughtful. Wow. She went to the goddamn army. I'm just older than I look.

It's Private Benjamin, for sure. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah, it's Private Benjamin. And First Wives Club. Oh. First Wives Club. I just watched that on mute in a bar the other day. There you go.

My favorite way to watch it. Yeah, so Jacob is our winner today. Of the whole thing? Oh, that's my favorite. You brought it all down. Where is the person you were playing for, Abby? Come get your prizes. You get a very heavy loot crate.

Yeah, you might want to... Someone can help you too, maybe. There you go. And you go and this bag in this poster i know it's too much stuff like have you ever gone by uh cbs television city after price's ride has been taping and there's somebody like just trying to put the whole Showcase showdown on the top of their car to take it home. It's like really it's crazy. Were these two posters made by

the same person? They were. I'm a real name tag detective. When I saw the backs, the way the shitheads were written on them the same way I was like, okay. those match up pretty good. Those are interesting ones. Those are interesting, yeah.

I don't know. Mortal enemies. Rice. What does Ben have on the back of... All right. Jesus Christ, Jacob. We've got some good ones. Do you guys want to play one more round just for fun?

Fuck yeah. I got a tiebreaker round that I did. And I'm really proud of this whole thing because you guys still haven't caught on to what the theme is. But so far we've got James Caan, Kirk Douglas, Paul Newman, Golden Hawn. Or dead. Yeah, it's all old Newman, Golden Hawn. Or dead. Yeah, it's all old or dead, people.

Here we go. Whose top four starts with Star Trek? Which Star Trek? Star Trek. No, just Star Trek. Okay. Shane? Star Trek. Okay. Shane. TV show.

Oh. Shane. William Shatner. That's correct. Thanks. Really redeeming myself in the round. In the practice round. Okay, name three more in William Shatner's top four.

Oh, you can do this. What else is he known for? What else has he done? He does commercials. Oh, you can do this. What else is he known for? What else has he done? He does commercials. Oh, God, don't shush. Everybody shut up. Is this embarrassing that I don't know that? I didn't know he did other things.

Everybody come on down to the UCB theater and shut up. I think the idea is You don't need to, I think the idea is you don't need to know more than that. Yeah, just more Star Trek. Shut your audience mouths.

What do you got? Just more Star Trek. More, let me write that down. More Star Trek. That was the name of one of them.

Jacob, do you want to guess? Yeah, Star Trek 3, The Search for Spock, them. Jacob, do you want to guess? Yeah, Star Trek 3, The Search for Spock, Star Trek 2, The Wrath of Khan. No, TJ Hooker and fucking Boston Legal. Search for Spock didn't make it in there. Those TV shows didn't make it there. Those ugly TV shows.

But Star Trek 2, Wrath of Khan is in there. Voyage Home. Yeah, Voyage Home, Star Trek 4. That's the biggest commercial success. Yeah, and Star Trek 5, The Final Frontier. That's his top four.

Yeah. And William Shatner concludes my fun little game of all of those people, James Caan, Kirk Douglas, Paul Newman,

Goldie Hawn, William Shatner. They're all mentioned in Adam Sandler's Hanukkah song. A little premature. Yeah, well, it's never too early to start. Not even Halloween yet.

It's not too early to start talking about the holidays and the next Doug Loves Movies 12 Guests of Christmas show December 13th at Largo. Is that what that's for? So, Jacob, you won the whole thing tonight? Is that what I said? Yeah, I did. And I had the most views.

Is that what really happened? Can you come back Monday night over at UCB Sunset as the reigning champion? Yeah. I think Sam Levine might show up too, so you're going to get some real competition. I've only played Sam once. I beat him, though, in San Diego. There you go. So finally

you guys are going head-to-head again. Yeah, he's been clamoring for a rematch. The numbers haven't been right. Our promoters have been talking, but I think it's time to get it on. Shane, what do you got to plug, buddy? Just my 65 city tour. Just my 65 city tour.

What are you doing, like one a day on that? Yeah, basically one a day. I mean, there's like 64 cities in America. Yeah, I'm, there's like 64 cities in America. Yeah. I'm doing all of it. I'm doing huge clubs and coffee shops and music venues and every sort of venue. And so if you want to see me

not covered in someone else's cancer blood, come out. I am cancer-free, you know. Newly cancer-free blood. It's like super clean blood. Yeah, that's the best part. I go to a lot of doctors to make sure my blood is fucking awesome.

I wouldn't brag about that into a microphone, because there's probably some vampires here. Why wouldn't a vampire live in Los Angeles? The weather's perfect. Today was amazing. Dan, you're alive. Yeah! Yes, so happy for that.

And what else you got going on? Hopefully I'll be going back on the road more now that I'm healthy again. But in the meantime, if you're in Los Angeles, I'll be on the At Midnight staff show over at Nerd Melt at the end of September. I think it's September 26th, so check that out. That should be fun.

Lots of fun people on the staff over there. Yeah, Rod Funches is going to drop in. Congratulations on your second Emmy for At Midnight. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, that's very cool. That was super fun. Got to run the At Midnight Twitter account from a chemo chair. That was a good time.

So I'm super proud of that one. Even uplifting cancer stories are bombing. Oh, hey! The words chemo chair really bring down a room. Follow me on Twitch. I just started a Twitch channel. It's where I try to be funny while I play video games and shit. Oh, that's fun.

I'm Telfer Dan on Twitch. Are you one of the Picture, the picture and picture guys? You one of those guys now? What? My kids are obsessed with this. Is that what you do? You play the game? Yeah, yeah.

So you can watch me play Overwatch or No Man's Sky on your phone. I fucking hate that Jacksepticeye guy. Do you know who that is? No, no. Is that like an Irish accent? I don't know if he listens to the show, but fuck you, man. Get out of my home. Get your voice out of my home.

Get away from my children. Hey, Stampy Cat of Minecraft, if you're out there, I'm a big fan. Do you know what this phenomenon, though, these people that play video games, children are obsessed with it. I have two children, yeah. I played the Vibe virtual reality today, and it was awesome.

Just thought I'd brag about that quick. Well, I've got a show to wrap up, so... 12 minutes. Jacob, got any plugs? Yeah, September 28th and 29th, I'll be at the San Francisco Punchline with my good friend Kasim Bentley.

We do this show called... We're really creative, so we called it Sear Off Bentley. And we basically just do racist crowd work for like an hour. And it's really... It's dueling racist crowd work for an hour, and it's really... He's black and you're white

and you just get up there and just go after him it doesn't really it doesn't count as white I mean it's white it's white but it's not white check your privilege bro

well I just mean it's not no it's not like white privilege that white if I go to jail and it's all divided up racially I don't get to hang out

with the white guys right but you don't get picked up for being no I mean it's it's better than white in a lot of ways. I'm just saying it's not. There's a difference. Are you the chosen people? It's like intelligence and creativity

and stuff. Not like, don't worry, don't take it personally. So I'm doing that show with Kasim on the 20th, 29th. I'm sure you all are booking your tickets on Kayak right now. Yeah, and how can people, plug again how people can argue with you. And also, speaking of arguing with me, I'm starting this new app and website called Bid Chat,

which is a lot like Periscope, but you can chat with broadcasters. And then I'm going to be doing this channel where you can also bid some money, a small amount of money, and a lot of it goes to charity, I think, where you can video chat with the broadcaster, and that would be me. And I'm starting a show called Sear Off Wars, where if you hate my Star Wars opinion as I'm sure most of you

or if not all of you do, you can actually pay money to argue with me about Star Wars and tell me why you think I'm wrong and get put in your place. Yeah, yeah.

He'll tell you why Jar Jar Binks is great. I sure will. Yeah. Yeah. She's said that about everything that's happened so far.

No, she's very enthusiastic about everything. She's the one that wants to buy the coloring book too happened She's very enthusiastic about everything She's the one that wants to buy the coloring book too She's very into psychedelics I was like the beer cans are black And she was like yay Alright so Joe Bagos The movie's called The Mind's Eye It's really fun if you like

Watching people's How would you say it Without giving too much away Their heads fucking explode. The heads fucking explode. Exactly. That's what I was looking for. If you say scanners in any way, though,

everyone's waiting for some splody heads. Right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, and it definitely delivers and it's on iTunes and VOD and check it out, you guys. Thank you for being here, dude.

For sure. Thank you to all of my guests, Shane Moss, Dan Telfer, Jacob for being here, dude. For sure. Thank you to all of my guests, Shane Moss, Dan Telfer, Jacob Seroff, and Joe Bagos. Love you, Levine. We'll be back over at, yeah, he's going after Sam Levine Monday night. You heard it here.

And I get another great guest in there as well. And as always, Kent and Paul are shitheads for thinking this name tag sucks. Jesus Christ is a shithead? That's the weirdest. Yeah, well, no, this one's weird too. Neil deGrasse Tyson is his shithead. The same handwriting as Jesus Christ.