Doug Loves Movies - Joe Ahern, Dana DeLorenzo and Doug Mellard guest

Episode Date: January 2, 2023

Doug welcomes Joe Ahern, Dana DeLorenzo and Doug Mellard to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies! Oh, hey, hey, hey everybody! My name is Doug, and I love motion pictures. This is Doug Loves Movies. Last ep of the year. Last bonus ep of the year. It's Friday, December 30th, but you're gonna hear this on Monday,

January 2nd or later. So happy New Year's to the listeners and almost New Year to my very special guest today. Yeah, this is a motherfucking theme episode. My guests

are the stars and producers and actors and creators and directors of a film currently on VOD wherever you V your D. It's called The Disappearance of Toby Blackwood, and they are Joe Aher, Doug Mellard, and Dana DeLorenzo.

Hello, everybody. Hey. Hello. Hi, Doug. Hey, gang. Hi, Joe. Hi, Dana. Thanks for having us, Doug.

Yeah, thank you. Let's get a hi from every possible combination. And it'll be like the opposite of the end of an episode of The Waltons. Let's actually meet everybody individually and alphabetically. By first name, yeah, a little twist there. The twist, this is like a Knives Out podcast because the twists do not stop coming. And they just go deeper. Let's first begin with one of the stars of this aforementioned film.

It's Dana DiLorenzo. Hey, Dana. Hi, Doug. How you doing? Happy New Year. Pretty good. Well, yeah, we're sort of in it. We're pretending that it's the new year. And I know I'm very good at pretending. It's a real showbiz thing, Dana. Have you ever as an actress had to like do like a Christmas special in August, that sort of shit?

Yeah, absolutely. And that's why it's like that. It's so ingrained to like not lie and to just work. It's hey, it's January 2nd, not the 30th. But to be honest, Doug, for all I know, I just got off of a red eye. And I'm so have you ever been so exhausted that you feel high, but you're not. But like, that's where I'm at. So it could be January 2nd. It could be the 30th. I'm just i'm going with what you said because you're the host it's your show and i like to pretend with you okay this is all right i'm gonna start i'm done i've done my tip you don't have to have a speech

prepared do you know me at all i do i do And I bet you both will. You know, I'll ask one of them about it right now, because the next guest that I'm going to introduce, he's the titular character of the film we're celebrating today. And I never tire of saying titular. It's the co-host of Wide World of Doug's Doug Mellard. Hey, Doug Mellard. Hey, dude. I never tire of listening to you say titular. You know, that's just the way you do it, Melly Mel. Are you – my question to you, you know, I've seen the motion picture

and I enjoy it very much, and my question is, do you worry that you'll get typecast as a weirdo conspiracy theorist who disappears? Well, I just worry that I'll be typecast as a weirdo in general because I'm a weirdo in general. I think you'd agree. Right. Yeah, you're definitely headed down that path. But I had fun playing a weirdo.

It's pretty freeing to just be an absolute wacko. Yeah. Well, also, you're more a high-energy weirdo. In real life, you're a more low-energy weirdo. Kind of. I don't know. Casual weirdo, that's what I'd say. I'm all over the place with energy, I guess.

You're like dress casual weirdo. Suit casual, rumpled suit weirdo. Suit coat, baseball hat weirdo. However you slice it, you're very funny in the film, and it was also something of a miracle. This is what happens with all movies. We're going to talk about this a little later in the show. The, you know, role's meant for one person.

It ends up somebody else does it. And everyone thinks, well, that's who it was meant for. Like, Doug, you were not supposed to play Toby Blackwood, but then you ended up doing it. And, you know, watching the movie, I just can't think of another actor who would have, you know, embodied the movie, I just can't, I can't think of another actor who would have, you know, embodied the role better. Oh, thanks. Well, yeah. Like, you know,

the whole film was shot during lockdown. So it was kind of a challenge as far as trying to find someone at the time that had the backdrop that we needed. And so I would happen to be in New Mexico for that time. And there was a lot of area where i could just freely film shit and so it was uh you know i was really nervous to fill in because i haven't done anything like this before but oh man once we got going it was so fun such a yeah and uh yeah it just you're it was a practical decision but also uh i know i feel this way sometimes when i'm like you know

trying to make videos and stuff out in public like did you when you were acting nutty sometimes were you ever just like was it hard to get a good take because you're self-conscious about going so over the top and and somebody could wander by oh god yeah some of the things that were said by not just me but my character in particular, like I would yell things in a very quaint part of Santa Fe where I'm yelling about drinking piss. And like I'm having to like text neighbors like, hey, what you're about to hear is going to be pretty weird,

but we're just making make-believe over here. Pretty weird, pretty strange. I'm glad we weren't arrested. Yeah, because you also, you know, went permit route i'm sure uh so like you know you just didn't want anyone to know you were actually making a movie right uh some some of the time maybe yeah yeah yeah well we can't let sag know that about that well i you know would never let any sag member listen to this podcast this is a real it's real exclusive we don't need it's really no none of those types although i guess i'm talking about myself here but that's one of the things i would like to say next after i introduce

the director co-writer star of the film, first-time guest on Douglas Movies. It's Joe Ahern. Hey, Joe. Hey, Doug. Thanks so much for having us on. I'm really psyched to be here. Hey, Joe, you want to give it a go? Sure. Yeah, yeah.

Well, I want to talk about... Do you get an extra charge when you hear that lady marmalade song and they say that, Hey Joe, you want to give it a go? Do you kind of be like, nod to yourself? Like, yes, I would like to give it a go. That's my, that's my alarm clock every morning, Doug. Oh my God. What a great way to wake up. Give it a go, Joe. Gitchy, gitchy, gaya, yaya. Oh man, I just thought of a good tiktok though is somebody enjoying their coffee and saying but using a piece of the song like referring to the coffee as as joe

i love it anyway i love it um okay so you were saying um yes so, so Doug kind of hit on it, but yeah, we wanted to just try and do something during lockdown. When we made this thing, when we were making it, the goal was to have it get out there in 2020 or 21, but that didn't materialize. But I think we were trying to rush to get this out there like because covid might go away we're like what if you know this this gets solved so quickly our movie's gonna be irrelevant all that but uh you know the the deeper we got into it we obviously realized that it wasn't going away um but um but yeah it was it was a challenge because we we pretty much had no crew so we'd you know film uh that you know the main two characters we'd shot with a movie camera and then every other character that these two guys would come across uh was kind of from their perspective

as a facetimer zoom so you know it opened us up to working with people we would have never in a million years gotten to work with. So that, that was really exciting. And, um, it's also, you know, I, I enjoyed it because I find that lockdown movies, whether they're movies that are pretending there wasn't a lockdown, but they made a movie anyway. And then movies that include the lockdown, have lots of zoom stuff and FaceT FaceTimes and whatnot. I find, I found that whole genre to just be lacking. Like everyone was doing it because they kind of had to,

but nothing really worked until I saw your movie because it incorporates it in a way that's not only true and real, but also you keep it interesting. It's not, it's not like you're sitting, staring at any one of these kinds of depressing things that we had to deal with during lockdown. You know, people don't want to, people are already tired of zoom from their own meetings that they have to go to, you know,

so they're not going to turn to their entertainment looking the same way. Well, yeah, I appreciate that. That was, that was one of our, you know, that was one of our you know that was one of our goals from the from the get-go was to not make this thing feel so claustrophobic and you know not to you know either there are definitely some pretty solid movies that were done entirely over zoom but we felt that that would get you know quickly become an overused device and it wouldn't have the best shelf life so we were like how do we how do we make this world not feel so claustrophobic while largely taking place in two apartments um but having the you know the zooms and the facetimes be from the the two main characters perspectives we thought

would make it just give it a little make it a little more dynamic um but um it's all a testament to how good of our editor uh good of an editor Dan Riddle is, you know, we gave him this so many separate elements and to have it, to make it feel cohesive was, was, you know, just kudos to him. And I don't know what movie we would have had if, you know, if we didn't have him. So. I can't think of a a to be honest with you i can't think of a comedy that was done using kind of like a more of a kind of a zoom kind of everybody's locked down kind of

like they did a father the bride thing uh it was all people on zooming with each other steve martin and the rest of the father the bride characters and uh it was just it's it's it just was always so rough you know and um so i just thought that it was very refreshing to uh how it's handled in in this movie and it also is like a time stamp because it really was at that where things were at that moment because you know now everybody's running around like the pandemic's over but you know there's still new crazy uh variants coming out of uh uh coming out into the world so on that note on that fun note let's play some fun trivia games and oh let me ask you this or just say i just want to make a statement jo Joe, and that is thank you for putting me in the movie so very briefly,

you know, because I'm sure I got paid the same as a lot of people that were in it like, you know, that worked all day or something. And, but you also got me a seat on the residual train because it is SAG. I'll get some checks.

You know, I don't know how much they'll be for or how long it'll take. I appreciate you putting me on that train. My pleasure, Doug. We're psyched to have you. And every time your scene comes up, you get a laugh every single time we've seen it in a room full of people.

So yeah're thank you for being a part of it it's a highlight of the movie for sure yeah yeah i saw the movie and it was my least favorite part but okay are you uh i i was thinking today as i was getting ready for this when i looked in the mirror that like my hair is even longer than it was then. And, you know, we shot, you know, I think you thought you, I think Doug Mellard, you've probably thought of me for this particular role, probably because of how crazy my hair was at the time. And now, now my hair is even crazier looking.

All right. So it's time for Recommendation Nation, And now my hair is even crazier looking. Oh, nice. All right. So it's time for Recommendation Nation, which is a part of the show where we normally ask the guests, I ask the guests to recommend a movie. And lately I've been putting restrictions on it and types of movies. And, of course, we did holiday movies. But for this episode, since we're right on the cusp of the time when everybody makes resolutions

and everybody, actors, filmmakers, comedians, uh, you know, we all sort of, uh, have that movie that we've always heard is amazing and great. And for whatever reason we haven't watched it yet. So I'm looking for your resolution movie, a movie that you've never seen that you think, damn it, I should really, in 2023, it's about time I watched from beginning to end.

Because there's a lot of movies that I feel like I've seen because I've seen so much, so many parts of it. Because it's a classic movie, you see all the little bits and pieces. But there's certainly some I have that I feel like I've seen cause I've seen so much, so many parts of it. Like, cause it's a classic movie and you see all the little bits and pieces, but there's, you know, there's certainly some I have that I'd love to just watch all the way through. Let's start with Dana. Unless you don't have one. Oh, I definitely have one. Oh, I definitely have one.

And it's because I think I'm the only person on the planet who hasn't seen it um and it's even more offensive because i'm one of the luckiest people on the planet that i got to be there and work there for three years but i have yet to see the first or any of the lord of the rings well you know once you've waited this long now you've got a time commitment you know there was a time when you were like sitting around and one of those movies came out and if you saw it you got that got done with you know i mean but if you just waited and waited now you've got over nine hours of viewing that you'd have to pull i know i know to watch the trilogy i know and then what do you do

about the other goddamn trilogy and then now it's the tv series oh i didn't even know about the tv oh my god and so see this is why this is why they keep getting pushed back because it's like it just gets longer and longer and longer if it was one i could you know if it was like jaws okay well i can manage two hours but now i have you know, if it was like Jaws. Okay, well, I can manage two hours. But now I have, you know, an entire lifetime of movies to catch up on just to see the first one, at least. But, wow. And no offense to those movies, but they're more serious than they are fun. And then to me, that takes a lot of the fun out of it.

Yeah. But you know what? Then again, then again, though, New Zealand. I mean, that's that, that's a reason to watch it in and of itself. Like I went to Hobbiton. What a, what a jerk I am. I went, I didn't deserve to go to Hobbiton. I didn't deserve, they even had the VHS in the, in the little like, uh, place we stayed to be able to watch it. And I put it on and fell asleep within 10 minutes. So I'm an, I'm a, I'm a, I am offended by myself to all the,

I've offended all the hobbits and I'm so very sorry. I'll give you a badge for achieving 10 minutes. Like you got to take it. You know, sometimes it's a one day at a time proposition. You know, I, some of these movies that are coming out now, they're so goddamn long that I'm just sort of like, you know what? Thanks to streaming. I really am going to start watching things. I'm going to turn a long ass movie into a limited series. Yeah.

You know, I'm going to say, OK, this seems like a good time for a break and then wait a day or so, especially if it's something I'm really enjoying, because then that's that's part of the fun of series television is having to wait for the next episode. that's part of the fun of series television is having to wait for the next episode. And, you know, with streaming, it's just like, easy to just binge it, but we're talking about movies. So Doug, what's a movie that you've never seen that you should, that you feel like you should. Oh, Batman forever. No, I'm joking. That could be i i seriously think that it's weird that

there's anybody out there that's missed a batman movie because i think everybody likes to weigh in about who their favorite batman is favorite movie yeah so you can't skip any of them and you got to watch the turds to really appreciate the oh boy. They're definitely worth it. No, this is going to blow your mind. And this is crazy. I don't know how this has even happened, but I've never, this is embarrassing. I've never seen Goodfellas.

What's the matter with you? And I know I love it, but honestly, yeah, it's weird see that that is that is very it's amazing because like even even amongst uh martin scorsese's work i find it to be the most just easy to watch fucking fun sales by i mean shouldn't be fun really but it but it is. And I only, you know, I don't want to spoil it for you, Doug, but it doesn't, I think by the end of it, it overstays its welcome a little bit. But what an amazing movie, just in terms of just the pacing and the characters.

You know, it's infuriating. I started to watch, I didn't even finish it, that long one that he did a few years back with a CGI Robert De Niro. and you know it's infuriating i i started to watch i didn't even finish it that that long one that he did a few years back with a cgi robert de niro the irishman yeah and i was just like why didn't i just watch goodfellas that would have been a better wait did an irishman just jump in to say the irishman i did i did I did. You're dying to talk about that movie at every opportunity. Hey, I know Irish, but I liked it

because I've got an Irish heritage. I never finished it. I never finished it. I love Scorsese, and I never finished the Irish movie. What is wrong with you guys? Well, that one, that is a movie that definitely springs to mind.

Like, I would have enjoyed it more if I had just done installments instead of forcing myself to just, you know, endure the whole product. But, you know, I just, I hope, I hope everybody gives up quickly on this, you know, de-aging thing because all of De Niro's de-aging scenes, like, it just, it's too hard. I can't. It's weird to look at. I don't mind it with Sam Jackson in Captain Marvel.

Because the whole movie is supposed to be a cartoon. But these movies where it's a realistic story, and then you're bringing in special effects to make an older actor look younger, it's like, hey, De Niro, so you don't want someone to have that break that you had when you got to play young Marlon Brando? You wish Marlon Brando had special effects to cover the job?

He's such a hypocrite. He's a hypocrite. job he's a hypocrite but you know scorsese wants to keep working with those guys so if he can dh them like why not you know he gets to keep working with his favorite actor buddies and not not have to tell stories that are exclusively about old men yeah you know but he should find some young people i think i think he's made enough movies with both de niro and dicaprio that he could just find somebody you know no offense dana but find somebody whose name doesn't begin with di uh okay well i'm a dd i'm a dd fortunately fortunately

so you don't qualify but that's why i spelled it instead of saying just don't work with any more d's well so you what you're saying they make the irishman too and they should cast joe ahern as the actual irishman i see where you're going i see where you're going deniro was irish in it i don't even know who the irishman was supposed to be yeah he wasn't yeah also just it's just such a boring ass title. Why would they call it that? It was based on a real guy. Yeah.

I mean, I don't want to spoil it for people, but. The name of the book is excellent. I think it's called I Heard You Paint Houses. That's a great title. That's really what it was called? Yes. I think so, yeah. Oh, that's amazing.

Yeah. But the guy was Irish, but he was like the you know the right hand man to the mob and that's why he was the i called him the irishman because he was an irish guy in the mob yeah yeah i don't know but it was yeah too long but yeah all right joe you're a big shot with the with the next good fellas starring irish you, I just don't like any movies about Hoffa because, you know, there's no mention of hot dogs. All right. What's your pick, Joe? What's a movie you've ever seen that you got to admit to everybody? Well, I don't know if this is going to be, you know, I try to watch all the uh end of this season you know the oscar films and i watch so many trailers doug that i i end up like driving my wife crazy because she hates watching trailers and um by the time i the the movie is out and i'm ready to go see it i i've like worn myself out by seeing the trailer 40 times and i or that's my excuse

for not having seen um i really always wanted to see that movie nomadland um and i never got around to seeing i know it's only been out for a couple years now but um i must have watched the trailer 40 times and i love uh the director chloe zhao's first or not first film, the previous film, uh, she had made the rider I thought was an excellent movie. So I was dying to see Nomadland and you know, they, the way they filmed it with a bunch of, um, like non-actors, um, throughout the, the American West and, uh, yeah, still, uh, still haven't seen it. Um, but like Dana, I also haven't seen any of the Lord of the Rings movies.

Oh, yay. Oh, I don't feel so bad. You know, it doesn't matter when it takes place. We're talking about nomads in both of those films. You know, I mean, Frances McDormand's not looking for a ring. She is decidedly single in the film I really like Nomadland a lot but it's like

a mood piece you know can I confess something to you everybody I haven't seen Eternals I haven't either me neither I'm friends with Kumail and I was excited that he's in it.

And I think she's probably got, you know, an interesting take. And then when there was blowback, that kind of excited me a little bit like, Oh, people don't, you know,

when the fan, you know, when the fan boys don't love something, I kind of get excited about it. Cause it might be more interesting to me. Cause it might be a little less of the kind of standard issue stuff that happens in those movies but I just

I just lost steam on it and it didn't happen and then now again it's the same thing where like the Marvel stuff just keeps coming and I want to be up to date and everybody always says Eternals kind of is almost stand alone in its world so as long as I can get to it before

Eternals 2 then I should be good and the to it before Eternals 2, then I should be good. And the way I said Eternals 2 just now, I think I sounded like Kevin in The Office. Eternals 2. Alright. Those are great. These are amazing picks

for movies you've never seen that you should see, and everyone should see all three of these movies, in my opinion. opinion and also I wanted to throw into the mix the movie that I haven't seen in addition to Eternals is I haven't seen Swiss Army Man oh wow and I've just been extra fired up to try to get around to it because of liking everything everywhere all at once so much.

That movie was amazing. Great movie. Alright, well we are going to take our first break and when we come back we're going to play some games and I smell a really highly competitive group here. Cutthroat.

Yes, it's going to be cutthroat. it's gonna be cutthroat and we'll do we'll start cutting throats right after this we'll be right back we're back I told you it'd be quick maybe I didn't anyway this first game we're gonna play is something

I made up this morning because last night I watched Babylon in its entirety, speaking of movies, it would be a great broken up. My favorite, well, there's so many things to talk about and in my opinion like about Babylon. I know it's a highly polarizing film, but one of the things I loved about it is I believe it set the record for

the longest amount of time for the title card appears because it's 30 minutes in. Wow. And it's like, by the way, this is called Babylon. Wow. Yeah. And it's a fun 30 minutes.

Like it's kind of like raising Arizona when it shows up about 18 minutes in you're already having so much fun. You go, Oh fuck. I didn't even notice. They never said what this is called. That's great. Yeah.

I really love the first half hour and then segments of it. And then I like the ending, but it's a lot in one sitting. But I got the impression from everybody, because it's so cocaine-fueled, all the characters do cocaine, and there good. And there's, you know, lots of orgies and stuff, but it's always, um, there's lots of slower scenes like this. It's not like, I was given the impression that it was like frenetic nonstop craziness for three hours, but boy, there is a lot of craziness in it. Like if there's,

if there's an opportunity for anybody bodily fluid to come flying out of somebody, they take advantage of it. Yeah. And animals, animals shit. I mean, it's crazy, but it's crazy, but it's also like, it's that kind of crazy where you, like you said, they're going, but not too crazy for me. You know, like I get why people are like losing their minds over this movie. Like, Oh my God, the things that happened in this movie. But I wasn't really shocked by any of it i was more just like impressed that this guy was just like you know whiplash la la land first uh man all those films won oscars like he's he's three for three for like movies that win osc. And then he makes just this massive budget movie with just this insane shots

where you're like, Oh, this is just about being over the top and insane. Like these battle sequences with all these people fighting on horses. It's crazy. Anyway, I can't wait to see. Yeah. It looks, it looks one scene where there's a joke is that there's a thousand extras fighting each other in the background while two people in the foreground are just having a little

moment. It's hilarious. And it's, you know, and it's just for a silent film and they're waiting for the right sun, sun, they're waiting for that magic golden moment when the sun's going down, but it's, they're still making black and white movies. So that that's hilarious. Cause,

cause over the years there's been so many stories of filmmakers that have like really punished their, everyone on the, on the crew for not getting that, you know, magic hour, you know, not getting that right. Sunlight, you know, or DPs that yell at everybody that, you know, we need to get a shot. That was Joe in our film. Yeah. Oh man. Okay.

No, I didn't mean to talk about Babylon so much, but I could Babylon about that film. Long goddamn day. Like it is so long that there's just so many things that come up in it that are interesting to discuss. And also the fact that nobody's going to see it. My girlfriend and I got to have an absolutely private screening. Nobody else was going to see it. And we didn't even look at our phones. Whenever I'm alone in a movie theater, if the movie loses my

interest at all, I glance at my phone and, you know, check email or whatever. And, uh, I have pulled my phone out once. It was that interesting for three hours, three hours and nine minutes. Wow. Whoa. It's that long. Oh my God. Yeah. It's insane. It's insane how long every, every aspect of it is just so big, but then it also, it just has a lot of... It's one of those movies where people that love movies or make movies can sit back and be like,

I get it more than people that are super into movies. You know what I mean? It's a little bit of a braggy... The people who really love it, I think they also just love movies. Because it is like a love letter to movies but at the same time it's a love letter to how how in real life you know singing in the rain uh what those people and seeing the rain went through oh yeah when they're transitioning from you know silent to sound, uh, was in a lot of cases, very tragic.

So that's sort of what Babylon's about is about how fucked over some people got by that transition. I'm so excited. It's a big fun movie about it. It's so, it's so, I just love it so much. All right. So I like it more and the more I talk about it, I like talking about it more than watching it, maybe. But I'll definitely watch certain sequences again. Like if I'm in a multiplex, I might like slip in and watch it for a while.

Do a little sloppity. It's not going to be in theaters for long, though. I'll tell you that. Okay. So it's already probably reduced to no matinees. It's just playing at night. But here's the game I came up with. Tobey Maguire is featured in the film.

He's a producer on it, but he also put himself in it, much like a Doug Millard would do. And he plays a gangster, zombie-like, just weird, horrible-looking face, but is supposed to be based somehow on Charlie Chaplin. It's weirder than it sounds. I got to see the movie again just to

figure out what the fuck was happening with Tobey Maguire. This game is called Tobey or Not Tobey in honor of both Tobey Maguireuire and Toby Blackwood. So I'm going to tell you a fun fact that may or may not be a fact about Toby McGuire. Okay.

It may be a made up thing or a actual fact tweaked to make it unfactual. I love it. We're going to start with Dana. Then we'll go to Doug. Then we'll go to Joe. You each get your own individual facts. You tell me if it's Toby or not Toby. If you get it right, you get a point.

After I go through a bunch of them, we'll see who has the most points and name a winner. Got it it dana you're up first oh god i i don't know i think i think i i i think you might know this but i just i just want to ask again you made this game up last night yeah okay this morning oh this morning okay yeah and i'm your first i'm the first contestant ever on this game right now okay i can't i can't uh you know i can't these games that i think of i don't commit them i don't commit to them until day of because if the guest cancels or something you never know what's going to happen like what if i what if one of you couldn't do it and i replace you got replaced with toby mcguire this game would

be awkward so i have to kind of work in a last minute mode but also you know also i like to keep things fresh as you'll see yeah my hands are sweating i'm nervous second game is super fresh but see here's the deal dana some of these are going to be crazy easy. And some are going to be, you know, more harder or just a guess. At least it's always a 50-50 guess. Yeah, that's true. Here we go. Hey, Joe, you want to give it a go?

Okay. Here we go. Here we go. Yeah, yeah. all right yeah yeah dana toby mcguire is a tournament winning poker player toby or not toby toby you think he plays poker and he's good at it i mean he's an actor he lies for a living right so listen to you with your uh awesome logic that is correct oh was i right yes yes yeah dana's on the board oh i feel like i'm a winner already well wait till you see what happens next doug dana d lorenzo has one point but i want to ask you doug close friends with leonardo dicaprio toby or not toby toby for sure toby is close friends with leonCaprio. It's true.

He got the script for this. He's a producer on this movie and both Brad Pitt and, and what's her name? Margot Robbie. They both read the script while they were working on once upon a time in Hollywood. Wow. And they both said yes to it. And even though they both play characters that do and are a lot of similar things to that other movie,

including Margot Robbie has a scene in a movie theater watching herself act in a movie. No. She does. Yeah. Wow. It works, though. It works.

Wow. It's just like how Scorsese uses that one really strong song in every movie okay Joe it's Joe's turn okay give it a go Toby or not Toby likes big butts and cannot lie I'm just kidding

was almost replaced by Jake Gyllenhaal in Spider-Man 2. Toby or not Toby? I'm going to say not Toby. Joe, say it isn't so. I thought you were going to give it a go. It was semi-famously Toby because he fucked up his back doing sea biscuit and then it was like oh yeah i don't think i can do spider-man 2 and then jake jones all came in trained tried on the tights the whole deal wow and that didn't end up playing the parks toby was like nope

i'm good oh man damn it i knew the first two i knew knew the first two. It still brought Jake back as a villain in this movie, so I guess it worked out for everybody. Yeah. Alright, we're back to you, Dana. Okay. Alright. Toby or not Toby, had to gain weight, had to put on weight

to initially play the role in the first Spider-Man, in Raimi's first Spider-Man. Gained weight. Toby. That is true. That is Toby. Yay.

You're killing it, Dana. Because he was playing a jockey in Seabiscuit right before. No, Seabiscuit was after Spider-Man. That was too. But he has been a maniac because other than getting, you know, I think gain weight to play Spider-Man means muscle. Yeah, that's what I thought you meant. Yeah, yeah.

So it's kind of a trick question. Joe wouldn't have gotten it. Doug, Toby or not Toby, almost played Ethan Hawke's role in Training Day. Oh. Not Toby. You think that's not Toby? I'm sorry.

It is Toby. What? Oh, wow. I know, right? I just can't picture it at all. Me neither. Same. I just can't picture it at all.

Me neither. Same. I actually had to go through quite a few training days, as it turns out, before they changed their minds and put Ethan Hawke in there. Wow. Yeah. Next up is Joe. You've got to get on the board here, Joe, otherwise Dana's going to walk away with this thing.

Oh, boy. Because we cannot count on Duck. In high school, his career goal was to become a professional golfer. I definitely know this. I definitely know this I definitely know this oh shit but this is Joe's question I'm gonna go with Toby

Doug what do you think it is I have no idea oh why do you say you definitely know it I would use it it's kind of weird it's a weird game when you play it it's not Toby I made it up. Oh, man.

Yeah, he's a nerd. He likes chess and yoga and something else that's boring. Not the golf stuff. Doug Mellor, good tactic because I was going to go not Toby, but I'm like, oh, well, if Doug knows this, it's obviously he's got to be a golfer. It's obviously something unknowable. That's because I was going to go not Toby, but I'm like, oh, if Doug knows this, it's obviously

he's got to be a dog. It's obviously something unknowable. That's why I was shocked that he would know something that's made up. Hey, I got to hand it to you, that was a good tactic. That was. Alright, Dana, this is it.

If you get this one, you just walk away with it. Oh my God. He studied theology in college. Toby or not Toby? He studied theology in college. I definitely know this. This is the reverse psychology.

So if you said it last time, do you mean it this time? Hmm. Well, he studied theology in college i'm gonna i'm gonna guess he didn't go to i'm gonna guess not toby you did it that was correct i don't know if he even went to college i just know that uh i made up the theology thing and it might not i don't know what kind of education he could have gotten because he's been acting since he was a child. His first movie, he was a teenager. That's where he and Toby became

lifelong. I mean, Leo became lifelong friends on This Boy's Life. This Boy's Life. Great movie. With Robert De Niro playing his actual age. Yeah. This was a fun one that I had. If the game had kept going,

I was voted most sexiest vegetarian by PETA in 2007. Toby or not Toby. Doug, do you feel like you know that one? Can you repeat it? Was voted most sexiest vegetarian by PETA in 2007. No, I will not repeat it. I'm going to say Toby. Not Toby.

Because he got that title in 2002. Oh, my God. Oh, wow. Good question. Wow. All right. So Dana won that Mother Grabber, and that means that Dana gets to go first in our next and final game of the day,

which we will play right after this break. We'll be right back. We're back. Let's play a game that I've been playing a lot lately because it's fun, it's unpredictable, and even someone like Trey Galleon can win.

It's a game called The Little Search Engine That Could. Now, I typed a word just today into the search engine on the internet movie database imdb imdb imdb i typed it in there and then i wrote down the top eight movies that are currently in the algorithm like in other words they're popular on imdb because they're being searched because people in the movies are currently in the news or the movie itself is getting a lot of attention uh that's how this algorithm works on imdb uh it's a little

unpredictable and the word that i typed in so start thinking of movie titles with this word in it but don't say any yet the word happy 2023 everybody the word is new lots of movies over the years with the word new in the title and it's spelled n-e-w there's no uh i i knew what you did last time there's no news k-n-e-w this is just any w new you'll each get three guesses but we'll take turns doing one guess at a time so there'll be three rounds of guesses and we'll eliminate from the list uh every time time somebody gets one. And the number of points you get are based on how high the list it is. If it's number one, you get eight points.

All the way down to number eight, you get one point. After three rounds, we add up the points. And we should have ourselves a winner. Might be a tie. And then we'll settle it somehow. Probably with a coin toss where I just just sit here and pretend to flip it and then just say whoever I feel like should be the winner. All right.

So, Dana, you get to go first, and then we're going to switch the order around. We'll go to Joe, then to Doug. That's going to be your order in this game. And, Dana, please tell me, with the hopes of it being the number one most searched on IMDb movie with the word new in the title, what do you think that could be? Well, I only have been able to think of one

and that's Gangs of New York. I think you'll think of more as you hear others being suggested and you have as of New York. I think you'll think of more as you hear others being suggested and you have a little bit more time. You'll have a second to kind of maybe catch up mentally or think of one. And not to mention the fact that sometimes one title will just make you think of another. In this case, the guys might have thought of something else after hearing Gangs of new york but you get four points because it is number five on the list um tallest top hat in motion pictures in gangs of new york on uh once his name's had daniel day lewis uh until he made lincoln and And that topped his own record.

It was pretty impressive. Okay, so Dana's got four points. That is a strong lead in a game where there remains available only about 17 or 14 more points. Joe, what's your first guess of a movie with the word new in it? A New Hope? The Star Wars one?

Alright, now you know I love exact titles on this program. Oh, God. Let's break it down. It's a Star Wars movie? It's one of the episodes? Yes. I don't remember which episode it is, though. It's a Star Wars movie. It's one of the episodes. Yes.

I don't remember which episode it is, though. Well, let's think about this for a second. There was the first trilogy was 1, 2, 3. Then the second trilogy would fill in before the last trilogy was, you know, 7, 8, 9. And that's why there was no nine because seven eight nine. No, there was nine altogether. What's that? I think it's four. Okay. And then what else?

Oh, God. Well, you said the word new already. Oh, Star Wars Episode IV A New Hope. Very good. We got there. Number six on the list. We're three points. Sweet. All right.

Yeah, Joe. Hopefully next time will be easier. I'm not a dentist. I'm not here to pull these answers out of you like teeth. Done. I'm God, I hope this is in there. Escape from New York?

Oh, dude, that is a great one, but I guess, you know, just in this particular moment, it falls after number eight somewhere, because it's got to be in there somewhere, because it does have the word new in it. But, unfortunately, it didn't make the cut right now.

And also, Escape from L.A. didn't make it either, because, you know, that doesn't have new in it. Unfortunately, it didn't make the cut right now. And also, Escape from L.A. didn't make it either because, you know, that doesn't have new in it at all. Was it Escape from L.A. or Escape to L.A.? I think it might have been from. I think it's from. I just remember Steve Buscemi surfing in the middle of, like, downtown

San Diego, LA. Okay. We're back to Dana. Have you thought of anything in the interim? Yeah, but it also is still just with the title New York in it. So I don't know if that's fair play. It's absolutely fair play. Whether it's on the list or not. Okay. All right. Let me make sure. Cause I know you just said you're a stickler for titles. um because but uh absolutely fair play okay whether it's on the list or not okay okay

all right let me make sure because i know you just said you're a stickler for titles it's like it's the i can't believe it's the sequel to home alone and it's called like home alone something new york something new i know it ends in new york home alone lost lost in new y? I don't know. That is correct. Oh, really? Wait, which one is it? Which one is it?

It's what you just said. You managed to somehow say it. I have no idea what I said. You were like, I don't know, Home Alone 2. I don't know, Lost. I don't know, in New York. Lost in New York. Yeah, it's Home Alone 2, Lost in New York.

Really? That's it? That's the title, yes. Yay. I love that York? Yeah. It's Home Alone 2 Lost in New York. Really? That's it? That's the title, yes. Yay! I love that movie. Yeah. And I love your style of play because that's the number one movie on the list. No, it's not! It is. No, it's not. Wait, really? Yeah. So that's worth

a whopping eight points. These guys are gonna have a lot of fun. Oh, man. Wait, I'm sorry. Pause. We have the... Wait, that's higher than Gangs of New York? Yeah, it's number one because we're just coming out of the holiday season when people are typing in holiday movies.

Everybody's talking about, for some reason, people are passing out pictures of Macaulay Culkin now and Macaulay Culkin then. He's been showing up on the internet for some reason. I don't know. He looks fine to me. And then, um, you know, of course there's a gentleman that appears in the film that people like to be mad about. Right. Right. Search the title as well.

Ah, right. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of people don't like Tim Curry. All right. So, um, a lot of people don't like Brenda Curry. All right, so a lot of people don't like Brenda Fricker. She's the pigeon lady. She's the pigeon shit lady. I love her. Yeah, she's nice. All right, Joe, you got to give it a hard go.

We need you to land one of these top ones. I'm going to go with New Year's Eve. Happy New Year. What was the one? Let's pick New Year's Eve. Yeah, New Year's Eve. You did exactly what I was hoping

you'd do. That was number two on the list. New Year's Eve starring Hilary Swank, Seth Myers, and a bunch of other people. All right. Yay! Yeah, one of those Gary Marshall holiday movies.

And it's like over two hours long and two characters are stuck in an elevator during much of it. So every time we see those two characters, we're just in an elevator, which is just stealing Bradley Cooper and Julia Roberts on a plane throughout Valentine's day. Anyway, so formulaic, but that was worth seven points, Joe.

So you're striking distance. I don't want to use that expression. Cause you know, that's not, nobody should be hitting anybody. But Doug, you seem destined to not be able to win this thing, but we could be a spoiler. What else have you got, Doug? I'm hoping this is in there because of the holiday thing, but Gremlins 2, the new batch? Or a new batch?

The new batch. I love the way all of you are good at just guessing at these titles because you know I have to take the first thing you say and Doug you got it right the first time then got it wrong when you tried to correct it

it's gremlins to the new batch yeah okay yeah and it's number eight on the list ah barely Doug you did the bare minimum to get you. You've got the bare amount of points. Perfect. To have points, and that's one.

So we have Dana has 12 points, Joe has 10 points, and it's always a pleasure to talk to Doug Mellard. Our third round begins now. Dana, can you solidify your lead by picking one more there's only three titles left that are in the top eight that you haven't named uh what do you think might be in there uh only again the only other one i can think of which is autumn in new york with uh winona rider and and Keanu Reeves. Richard Gere.

Richard Gere. Richard Gere. Richard Gere. Yeah. Yeah. I just saw a clip the other day about the time Taylor Swift met Richard Gere and didn't recognize him. Oh.

Yes. Chicago was her favorite movie. She's like standing there talking to Richard Gere. She goes, what's your name? Oh, my God. Maybe he had CGI on his face and she couldn't recognize him when he was aged backwards. I know.

That guy still looks really good, doesn't he? He does, yes. That's why. He's a piece of the heartthrob. Crazy. It's crazy. Wait, what did you say? The movie, Autumn in New York. I feel like I'm cheating because all I keep saying is new york

yeah no but autumn in new york is uh not didn't make the list no but um finally a whopping 12 points so joe has to pull uh actually any of these would do it if joe got number seven that would uh tie things up and if he got number three or number four he's the winner today uh do you have any more movies with new in the title joe i i do and on the subject of martin scorsese how about new york new york uh another i think excellent guess but unfortunately a movie that really has no reason for anybody to be talking about it right now. You know what I mean? Yeah. Liza Minnelli still with us. She still has, there's still a Twitter account that just every time anything dies or goes out

of fashion, it says Liza Minnelli has outlived it. Great. I fucking love it, but I'm so sad about the concept of Liza Minnelli dying and then just having to go, well, that's the end of that. But that is the end of that in terms of our scores. Dana, you did it. You're our winner today. Yay.

Congratulations. And then let me tell you what. Can I throw one in there? Maybe. It's not going to be on here, I promise you. What do you got, Doug? New Jack City? Nope.

Nope. Yeah. These are real tough ones. These are ones that I don't know why anyone would come up with them. At number seven, Downton Abbey, A New Era. That's a movie? That's what the Downton Abbey movie was subtitled, A New Era. Miss's a movie? That's what the Downton Abbey movie was subtitled. A New Era.

Exactly. And then from the superhero world, one that I never saw and it felt like it got a lot of negative attention. The New Mutants. Weird. Yeah.

Escape from New York couldn't bounce that no but I think that's just because people are always having some always looking into these you know DC and Marvel movies and trying to be angry about it and then

number three if you want to really be angry about a movie that does not deserve to be on a list new in town starring renee zellweger oh what as that girl that moves to the midwest and doesn't know how to work a stove i've what that was yeah on the tip of my tongue. I think it's because it's snowy and Christmassy, maybe. Is that a recent? Currently popular? No, it's a good it's a pre-her

looking like a different person. Ah, gotcha. It was when she still looked like Renee Zellweger. So now she's a character actress who just is going to gain weight and do prosthetics and stuff every time. Good for her, I'd say. She was a really good Judy Garland. I just wish that movie was worth,

you know, was more entertaining. When people win for biopics, the movies are never the star, you know. It's always the person playing the part. Well, congratulations, Dana D. Lorenzo. You did it. Thank you. I've never won a game.

You get to do your plugs first. What would you like to plug besides the fact that the Disparates of Toby Blackwood is currently available on VOD? Oh, what do I like to plug? I'd like to plug that. That's what I'd like to plug. I said you can plug anything else. I got your plug out, your big plug or your current plug. The reason we're all here today,

out of the way, but what else? What about your social media? Where can people watch you? Oh, right, right. Yes, that. Sorry. That's all right. I'm Dana DeLorenzo. I'm so excited. I actually won a game. I've never won a game in my life. I'm at I'm Dana DeLorenzo

on the socials or Dana DeLorenzo official and a couple of things coming out in the new year to, to stay tuned for, but I'm not allowed to say it yet. So we'll see. Okay. At Dana D Lorenzo. D not D I that's right. Capital L. Don't mind everybody. Thanks Doug. I appreciate it. Oh, speaking of Doug's

Doug Millard besides the film and our podcast together, Oh, speaking of Doug's. Doug Mellard. Besides the film and our podcast together, what else have you got to plug? Oh, just find me on the social at Doug Mellard. And, you know, watch Gremlins 2, the new batch. Yeah, find me on social. You'll find my stand-up updates coming up and all that stuff so if you don't have time to watch it just type it into the imdb search engine so you're trying to give it a little boost yeah try to get it up the list a little bit um but i don't know how often people are gonna be like i want to watch a movie but it has to have the word new in the title i will type that into imdb and watch that movie home alone 2 shit okay um joe ahern

you have been an incredible guest oh thank you a wonderful first timer um and again all the work that you did on the film and Dana and, uh, and the whole cast, I just really, uh, the whole thing's very charming and I hope people, uh, check it out. And, uh, what is there anything else you need to, uh, get out there? Uh, I don't have anything to plug, uh, because they're all in script format. So, uh, uh So Doug and I are working on a new project, but yeah, there's no plugging of that of any kind just yet.

All right. Well, when you're writing it, you know, and trying to write a character for me, keep in mind, my hair is much longer now. Awesome. Awesome. Well, thanks for having us, Doug. I really appreciate it. And um yeah i hope people see the movie we worked we worked on oh my social um the real joey mayo on instagram i don't know why that's still my name on there but um it is um i have we'll get you on uh we'll get you on wide world of dogs to talk about that and uh other other names other name stuff and um i for me january 7th uh is the next dynasty

typewriter show uh douglas movies in la at 4 20 in the afternoon and it's uh we got a real fun guest lineup uh so get your tickets for that. And all of my info and stuff is at douglasmovies.com. And then maybe I should have warned you that this was coming, but I hope, hopefully you'll know the answer to this Joe. I end every episode of late by just saying the last line from a motion picture, some iconic last lines and other last lines that you're like,

what? That's what they said at the end of like, at the end of thank God it's Friday. last line from a motion picture some iconic last lines and other last lines that you're like what that's what they said at the end of like at the end of thank god it's friday somebody just goes there for some reason so that's a you know closing line do you know what the closing line is of uh of disappearance of toby blackwood yeah it's we had a little bonus scene in the credits it's um don't be afraid of death west it's just a state of mind and then doug says that line as i'm running off camera don't be afraid west yeah west is my character's name he's shouting i was like west what yeah don't be afraid of the west. Don't be afraid

of death, West. And what's the rest of it? It's just a state of mind. I mean, classic. It's ready to go down in history. Yeah, see, that's a good closing line. Do you know the closing line before the bonus scene?

If somebody doesn't see the bonus scene, what's the last line? Would it be, oh shit? It might be, oh shit, with the big, That's why you needed something, yeah, you needed something more eloquent for the actual last line. Sure.

Last line. Something a little more tasteful, I guess. Yeah. But I believe it is, oh shit. Yeah. Okay. So I'm going to close with the final final line from your movie because that's really throwing a monkey wrench

into my last lines thing plus also a lot of times the last line is like you know a bunch of lines you know and you just read the very last one it really doesn't make any sense out of context but this is a good one so thank you to Dana DeLorenzo we'll have you back on the

show soon as a one so uh thank you to dana de lorenzo we'll have you back on the show soon as a returning champion and thank you and doug mellard and joe ahern and uh everyone involved thank you everyone involved with disappearance of toby blackwood and as always don't be afraid of death wes it's just a state of mind. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you. Because Doug loves movies.