Doug Loves Movies - John Hodgman, Milana Vayntrub, Brent Weinbach, and Pat Francis Guest

Episode Date: January 13, 2015

Doug welcomes John Hodgman, Milana Vayntrub, Brent Weinbach, and Pat Francis to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming babies, sticky seats with 50 azipop or kernels in his teeth. They're still not warm, that he won't sleep, but Doug loves movies. Hey, hey, hey everybody. My name's Doug and this is Doug Loves Movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. That's twice in like the last month or two that I've done that. I've totally fucked it up. Coming to you once again from

the UCB Theater in Los Angeles, California in the year 2015 on Tuesday, January 13, going on 30. Since last I spoke and you listened, I did a stand-up show at Spokane, Washington, where many members of the audience

suffered from Amy Adams disease, which is the inability to not yell out answers during the games. I did a stand-up show at a rock club in Spokane, and it was a great turnout, awesome crowd, super fun show. But I dared to try to play Last Man Stanton at the end, and everybody in the audience just thought it was, the game was just everybody yells out the answers. They didn't give a shit about the people on the stage.

And they all just started yelling out names of, it was Kevin Costner that we were doing, and they all just started yelling out Kevin Costner names, and so it got kind of crazy. I got kind of mad at them, as you can imagine. But other than that, it was a super fun show, and everybody there was really, really nice to me. So Spokane, I keep getting apology tweets from people. Sorry how my city treated you or whatever.

And it's like, well, no, I just won't play that game again next time. I'll tell a few more dick jokes and then say goodnight. And everybody would have gone home happy. Charleston, South Carolina. I'm doing stand-up this Friday, January 16th at the Sotil Theater. I hope I'm

pronouncing that right. As part of the Charleston Comedy Festival. That's this Friday. And then San Francisco, we're doing the final two Twilight movies. We've done three of them in San Francisco at the Castro Theater. We're going to bang out the last two as part of Sketch Fest on February 7th and 8th. Sketch Fest, sfsketchfest.com for tickets. I've got amazing comics interrupting

on both of those. As I always do. I always try to get amazing people. Now it's time for Tweet Relief. Tweets about movies. At Tidmore, T-I-D-M-O-R-E Tidmore tweeted about the movie Whiplash. Whiplash is the best

Whiplash since Snidely. This has been tweet relief. Tweets that no one's going to even get. But it made me laugh. And the prize bag, you guys, is so full of stuff. It's really, it's one of those Apple store bags that you can turn into a backpack, and you're going to need to, because this stuff is so heavy. Like, there's a bag of these in here. There's a t-shirt and a sticker from All Things Comedy.

The sticker says you're an All Things Comedy supporter. That's Bill Burr and Al Madrigal and some other people, podcasters, all got together and started their own podcasting. What do you call it? It's like a society network, but it's run by all the comics. There's nobody like, I guess they're all in charge of themselves. A Poke Bowl, as featured on Getting Doug with High. And we're going to have to talk

to the guests about the next few things. Oh, a lighter, of course, from Chameleon Glass. Oh, and a Sharpie we've got to tell you about. You're not going to believe this Sharpie, you guys. It's crazy. Let's give a big big warm welcome to my four guests tonight. Pat Francis,

Brent Weinbach, Milana Weintraub, and John Hodgman. Hey. That's Milana, everybody, and she's back. Hi. Fine trub. Yeah, okay.

Yeah, I just, so, my whole mind, that's all I could think about the whole time. Was not saying my name wrong? Yeah. You said a lot of other things before that. I know, but they're all written down, and they're all words that I know how to pronounce. But then you look at your name written as it's spelled, and it's not, it doesn't seem like it would be pronounced Vintrop. Okay, well, I'll never give you a hard time for saying it wrong.

All right. Even though you do every time. That was wrong again? No. Yes. All right. You brought a bag of cuties? Yeah, they're cuties.

Where'd you get these? Oh, at the orchard. Oh, the one over on Pico and... No, the orchard across the street at Gelson's. Oh, okay. Yeah. Beautiful Gelson's Orchard. Well, thank you for bringing those. I also brought some gummy treats

just to pass out individually for everyone, even the losers. So when do you pass those out? I know you mentioned that it was a tradition because you did it the first time you were on the show. I've done it pass those out? I know you mentioned that it was a tradition because you did it the first time you were on the show. I'd done it once

and I want to do it again and that makes it a tradition. So when did you pass them out last time? Like now? After I won. Then you walked around and poured them

into people's mouths? Here, I'll do it right now. Okay. But you can continue with your podcast. Yeah, that'd be great. Okay. I'm not going to continue with your podcast. Oh, yeah, that'd be great. Okay. I'm not going to stop everything for this.

No, it's not going to be very interesting to the people not here. It's kind of fun to listen to, imagine that Lily from the AT&T commercials is walking around the room giving everyone a gummy. What a gracious guest. This feels like a gummy. What a gracious guest. This feels like a cult. That's John Hodgman, everybody. His first appearance in the L.A. version of the show, I believe.

I do, too. Spelled Weintraub, pronounced Hodgman. And you brought something that was delivered to you in a custom bag with artwork on it, so you added your name to it. There's a guy named Jeffrey Rowland who makes T-shirts for my Judge John Hodgman podcast. And I asked him to send a large Judge John Hodgman neutral T-shirt and then an extra large Canadian House of Pizza and Garbage T-shirt, which is one of our main sponsors on the podcast.

And I believe that that's what's in that bag, but I don't know because I didn't open it. And I didn't open it because Jeffrey or his wife Holly decorated the bag. They sent it to me with a picture of a sperm whale on it and a very beautiful calligraphed H. And so I figured we'll make that part of the prize as well. And you'll also get their address on the return shipping label and information about where I stay irresponsibly in Hollywood. There you go. And what brings you out to California?

Are you visiting for a particular project or something? Just doing the podcast circuit. Well, you know, I'll be back in LA I mean, New York on March 8th if you want. You could have just stayed home and I'd bring it to you. I'll see you then. Okay, bye. Thanks everybody.

That joke would imply that the podcast circuit was only your podcast. True. That's Brent Weinbach, everybody. Brent Weintraub is correct. Brent brought for the prize bag a piece of paper that he's turned into a coupon. That I found at an orchard.

It's a coupon. Good for one Mostly Live album. By you. By me. Mostly Live is the name of the album. So that's a coupon. So what do you do?

Like, you shove this in the internet? How do you redeem it? You just hold onto it, put it underneath your pillow. I'll come in at night. I'll come through the window. And you'll find a special gift the next morning. It might not be the CD. It's not something sexual, though, in case some of you are laughing at that possibility.

And Pat Francis is here, you guys. Hello. Another return guest. These are all return guests. So there's going to be some excellent gameplay tonight. It's going to be very exciting. I brought a bunch of stuff. You brought so many things.

I went crazy. Yeah. Let's start with your wife. I brought my wife. Wait, who wrote this book? That's my wife. My crazy. Yeah. Let's start with your wife. I brought my wife. Wait, who wrote this book? That's my wife. My wife! Okay. I screwed it up. She's a big deal.

Yeah, she wrote this book about a screenwriting teacher. Am I married? I don't think I'm married. She wrote a book called The Coffee Break Screenwriter. And also signed it. Did she write something funny in there? I'm married. She wrote a book called The Coffee Break Screenwriter and also signed it. Did she write something funny in there? I doubt it.

Maybe her name is funny. What is her name? It's Pilar Alessandra. I'm going trouble. She wrote Love Movies, Love Writing, Love Your Story. And then she signed it.

Not funny at all. No. Inspirating. Unless you find love ridiculous. To get a goddamn sense of humor. I know. No, but it's a nice sentiment. And then, speaking of things that are hilarious,

you thought someone in this audience might enjoy owning an Eddie Money CD. Well, now wait a minute. That's just not any Eddie Money CD. Oh, it is. That is autographed by Eddie Money. It is autographed by Eddie Money, you guys. Yeah, Google

him. You'll figure out who he is. Yeah. Oh, he's in those commercials for Geico. Yeah, he looks like a nutjob. Yeah. He really does. He really looks crazy. I like the one where the guy spikes the lunch meats. I like that one, too. It's so funny.

And then you also brought a Never Not Funny podcast-a-thon. What do you call this thing? Tumblr? That's something that, yeah, what do you call that? Cup. I call it a cup. Really? Yeah.

Okay. But it's really sturdy. It's something you get for free and then throw away. It's a really sturdy item, though. That's from... Shouldn't there be a straw that goes with it? You know what? Look.

I didn't say it was never used. I just brought it along. And I brought one more thing that you wanted to chat about. That Sharpie. Oh, that's right. It's the worst promotional item in the history of promotional items.

Yeah, because it says on it, in the same lettering but very small, is the Cheap Trick. It's the Cheap Trick font. Font. Google them. They opened for Eddie Money a few times. It says the official Pat Francis autograph pen.

Right. Wait a minute. Huh? What? Can I see it? Sure. You didn't get Monogrammed Sharpies Yeah

I did I want this I mean I don't want This dumb one With your name on it But You want You want ones

With your name on it Oh I do I do And then I don't have To sign anything I just hand them the pen Might Might I recommend

An ACDC font? I'd have to Google it. Okay. Alright. That did just give me a great idea. I'm going to sign Pat's pen. This is meta. Yeah. I'm going to sign it with my Sharpie.

Does Sharpie write on Sharpie? It does. Is there nothing Sharpie can't do? Is that a custom Sharpie pen you're writing with? They printed Sharpie on it? This is, man, this is the... It's not easy.

Yeah, but I did it. That looks good. Sharpie writing on Sharpie is like a snake eating its own tail. A really stupid snake. So all of that is in the prize bag tonight. Someone's going to win. And I'm kind of excited about, this is a first for me, I think. Oh, if anyone wins the prize bag, hand me that piece of garbage cup,

and I'll throw it away for you. Provides such a service. Brent actually said to me, when I asked him to come on the show again, he said, or maybe he said the next time I'm on the show, but however it came up, he basically named a game that he wants to play, and

didn't know necessarily the name of the game, but he described it in enough detail that I know what he's talking about. What's that? Last time I did it, you called it Seth Rogen. Right. So that's how I know it as. I don't know if that's the name of it still.

Oh, okay. I would have recognized that. Okay. But you said, let's just play that game where everybody names the actors. Yeah. No, not the actors, the movies that an actor was in. Yeah, yeah. See, you described it beautifully.

Yeah, I think that's even better than Seth Rogen, I think. I knew exactly. Well, it's called Last Man Stanton. Oh, okay, that's, okay, good. And we're going to play it in a moment. But first... Tease. Yeah.

But first, we have to determine who you will be playing for today. So I'm going to say, let the games begin. And the name tags will come out. And you guys all go select who you want to play for. And while you do that, we're going to do this. We're going to take a quick commercial message. We're going to talk about our friends over at Xero. X-E-E.

Why am I doing the ad? Let's just listen to it. We'll be right back. And we're back! That was a really thorough process there where you chose your name tags. I know which one I like the best. I know the one

that's got the highest retail value. But, uh... Let's start with Milana. Who are you playing for down there? I'm playing for Chad, Buddy Chad. Oops, I didn't look at the back. That's Chad. Okay.

You can look at the back. We just don't want you to say it out loud. Okay. What kind of an animal is that dressed like Marty McFly? What is that? What is it, Chad? It's a panda. Is that Marty McFly? Yeah, it is.

Very nice. Can I say something about Chad? Sure. No, you prefer I didn't? No, and then especially when Judge John Hodgman had my back on that. Sorry. Thanks. Sounds like at least two of us

want to hear about Chad. I'm just saying that Chad's my friend. Is that cheating? Wait, you're playing for your own friend? Well, I feel... Sounds like at least two of us want to hear about Chad. I'm just saying that Chad's my friend. Is that cheating? Wait, you're playing for your own friend? Cheating Chad. Well, I feel like I owe him... You can't play for your friend. It's a conflict of interest. No, the interest is still just me.

That Sharpie's going to go to Chad, and then you'll be like, thanks, Chad, I'll take the Sharpie home. I thought she was going to do it with the Clementines. Yeah, it could be anything. to do it with the Clementines. Yeah, it could be anything. I really just want the Clementines. But can I explain to you please why I have a special

interest in my friend Chad besides him being my friend? Is that he taught me how to play the Molten Game and I won last time and I feel like he deserves a little bit of celebration. You almost got a third of the crowd. I refuse to applaud.

It's only the people I gave gummy bears to. I refuse to applaud for this crooked, corrupt... I can't believe I flew across the country for this podcast. And now it's being rigged by this cult leader handing out gummy bears and currying favor and playing for her friends.

Who are you playing for, John? Some stranger that I don't know. The way it should be. She handed me a poster that says The Adventures of Chris Tintin. And it has a female version of the Belgian comic book character Tintin and it has a female version of the Belgian comic book character Tintin. A female Tintin, which has been a fantasy of mine for a long time.

Because her name's Kristen. Is that what it is? I thought maybe your name was Chris Tintin. Which would be great. Did you do the art on this? It's beautiful. Very nicely done. And I won't read what's on the back, though I find it to be hilarious. So, do the art on this? It's beautiful. Very nicely done. And I won't read what's on the back, though. I find it to be hilarious.

So you all better hope I win. No, we gotta hope you lose. Well, I know I hope I lose. Brent, who are you playing for? I'm playing for Daniel. He brought what looks like a thing you hang on a door knob. It's a do looks like a thing you hang on a door it's a door it's a it's a do not disturb door thing and uh on the front it has the marshmallow man and it says are you the key

master which is that phrase jumped out at me that question jumped out at me because it's a question that means a lot to me as somebody who wears a chastity belt every friday night and I also was intrigued by this because it's a Ghostbusters themed door thing and it even has a back that says, it says back off, well he changes to Dan, I'm a scientist, but I'm just wondering what hotel is this that has a Ghostbusters thing on it? Yeah, where is the Ghostbusters promo?

Is it a hotel? Or is it just a pack of Ghostbusters themed door hangers? The one from the movie? Is the hotel from the movie? What hotel? Some old hotel in New York? Oh, the Ghostbusters hotel. Oh. Yeah, the classic.

Ghostbusters hotel in New York. They renamed the plaza Ghostbusters in honor of the 30th anniversary of the film. I thought they named it Home Alone in New York. That's next year. Oh, okay. All right. I think that's neat.

Yeah, that any hotel has that as their door-hanging thing is cool. There was one hotel in New York that I kept it, and it's on my door at home because it just says, forget about it. I'm just like, what? Who are you playing for, Pat Francis? Well, let me see.

This is like magic. Push it. Hello, my name is Justin. It's just on. Right on his iPhone. Right there on his iPhone. This is an iPhone 6? Fucking keeping this.

I win. I was going to say, I can't think of any other reason to pick that name tag because he just put his name on his phone. I know. Like here's,

there you go, there's my name on my phone right there. This is in tribute to that Chris Evans movie about the cell phone, correct? Yeah.

See? Oh, there you go. Can we call his mom? Can we see that? Oh, very good. You should sign this with your Sharpie. Oh, sure. Absolutely I will. That'd be a nice thing for him to take home. If you do, just as

a dick, we just all sign the screen. There you go. Fucking Jace Justin or whatever your name is. I'm not even going to win for him now. Did you pick that because it was a cell phone? I did. Yeah. Why are you wearing a parka?

How about that is the question. I like to wear protection when I go on podcasts. I like to make sure I'm safe. The chilliest man I've ever seen. I like to be very cozy. I have a survival knife on me, too. Oh, no. There is a gentleman in the audience whose name tag did not get picked,

but he drew something, and he came all the way from the UK for the show tonight. I mean, that's not the only reason you came here. But while you're here, you might as well. If you didn't come specifically for this, you should get out. You should just be on the show all the time just you're just bringing down the law on everybody um what did you really come for to hang out and just see just say you came for this and everyone will be so happy don't you have any sense of showpersonship at all

like if it was a family death or something then that then then that would be worth relating any sense of showpersonship at all? Like, if it was a family death or something, then that would be worth relating. Right? Do you know? But just to hang out and see a whole bunch of podcasts, just say, I came to see the show. I love it so much. Let's do it again. Go ahead. Cue him up.

What's your name, by the way? Harris. Harris. Why... Oh, yeah. I saw Harris is spelled like H-A-A, by the way? Harris. Harris. Harris, why... Oh, yeah. I saw Harris is spelled like H-A-A-R-I-S. Yeah. Wow. I don't like this at all. So why are you here in the United States?

Douglas Movies. Douglas Movies is his answer. Wait. Are you saying you came just for this? Only for this. You can stay. Let me shake your hand. Sit down.

It's okay. Alright, so you know the game Last Man Stanton, and you probably, when you listen to the show you probably have names that you would want to yell out if you were here in person, suggestions for who to play the game with

so who should we use tonight? John Lithgow I don't like that one I don't know about that one I don't know that person I don't know about that one I was sure he was going to say Maggie Smith. How about somebody like Steve Buscemi or someone?

Someone who's been in like 100 movies. You know, we could just make this game last the whole podcast. You know that Lithgow's been in more movies than Buscemi, right? How many? Fuck. I would guess. Or at least as many. Oh, no, Buscemi's...

Lithgow had a running start. I love the idea that you've got a whiteboard at home where you're keeping score. He's got a tally. Lithgow versus Buscemi. Yeah, I just re-stumbled into that one thing that I just happen to have

a big dry erase board at home. Buscemi. I have fat heads of both of them on the wall on either side. Buscemi's been in more movies than anybody.

I don't think that's true. He's the top movie guy. Top movie guy. You can't come here and pick the game and the person. Yeah, you're really... I studied the whole Steve Buscemi IMDB before I got here, and I just wanted to make sure that we played with him.

You know what, Doug? The whole thing is already rigged because of her. We might as well play the game that he wants to play. I don't know who this Lithgow guy is! How about somebody like Robert De Niro? You know Buscemi, Doug? The whole thing is already rigged because of her. Yeah. We might as well play the game that he wants to play. I don't know who this Lithgow guy is. How about somebody like Robert De Niro? You know Buscemi, though? I've heard of him. Wait a minute. Really, you don't know Buscemi?

Buscemi's been in every movie. I'm kidding. Buscemi's been in every movie. So that's the idea, is we just name movies, and we're probably right. He's been in every movie. Yeah. But that way, the game should just be really long-lasting.

What about movies that they've both been in? Alright, let me think about this for a second. Buscemi and Lithgow. No, I don't... No? No? I might have to check my brand new iPhone 6 to find that out. Guys, who's Lithgow?

Last time we played it, I can't even think of one. It was Tom Hanks and that was a great... Buscemi should have shown up in This Is 40, but he didn't. Buscemi's been in everything. Except for This Is 40.

But yeah, I can't think of a Lithgow Buscemi crossover. Maybe they really hate each other. Lithgow was in This Is 40. You already gave us one. Why? You just started us off. Oh, with a Lithgow movie? This Is 40. You already gave us one. Why? You just started us off.

Oh, with the Lithgow movie? It's a freebie. Alright, Pat's next. Blowout. Yes. It's very scary in that one. Thank you. Alright, I mean... See, here's the thing. I'm going to be out real quick on this one. I think...

Isn't he in Passenger 57 or something? Here, I got a great game. For you only, Buscemi movies. Everyone else, Lithgow. Who do you want, Milana? Who do you want to, whose movies do you want to do? Tom Hanks? Oh, someone adorable, yeah.

Okay, so she's going to do Tom Hanks. Are you cool with Lithgow? Yeah, I? Oh, someone adorable. Yeah, sure. Okay, so she's going to do Tom Hanks. Are you cool with Lithgow? Yeah, I like to play the games. Yeah, me too. I want to play the games too. I'm with By the Rules. Judge Hodgman. Cliffhanger.

All right. So wait, what was your Buscemi? How about... What? No, no. There's just so many to pick from. There's so many to pick from. Yeah, that's why. I don't even know where to start. Zero in on one. Gone with the wind. Let's just so many to pick from. There's so many to pick from. That's why.

I don't even know where to start. Zero in on one. Gone with the wind. Let's go ahead. Just run the table. All right. Let's start with New York stories. Okay.

I don't even remember if you said that, but I don't care. He plays Rosanna Arquette's love interest. All right. Hodgman says cliffhanger. Yeah. Am I playing for real or for, like, girl push-ups? No, you're for real, but Tom Hanks. I'm playing for girl push-ups.

Oh. Or you're out, because you don't know any Lithgow movies. Can I say the TV show? No. What? Okay, then. Can I name a book he's written? Acting.

Acting. You've got mail. What, really? Tom Hanks. Tom Hanks, guys. Where did Lithgow do in that? The one guy I gave gummy bears to is really my support system here.

Alright, you've got mail. Good job. Thank you so much. I'm going to stick with Lithgow and go, the World According to Garp Yeah Pat I will say Feel free to switch over

to Steve Buscemi when he wants to No You gotta stay once we're in I will say Harry and the Hendersons Yes you will

A smattering of applause for the classic Okay give me another Buscemi Living in Oblivion. Okay. He's naming movies I don't even know. He couldn't say anything. No, that's a good one.

I like that movie. I don't like it. You did Garp because that was going to be my back pocket one. Oh, okay. Now I've got to go into my other back pocket. Okay. Buckaroo Banzai Across the Fifth Dimension. Oh, very nice.

You're good at everything. Can I? No, I think I'm all out of Lithgow now. Are you high-fiving me? I can do that, but I also had a question, though, too. Can I ask you a quick question? Please. I would like to compete against somebody.

Can you actually play Steve Buscemi also? You're so bossy! I'm saying do both games Both games Like Lithgow and Buscemi Okay whatever Well then you have to do Hanks too

Or else she's gonna run away No I don't mind Playing against nobody That means I win Chad Still who lasts longest With whichever name You've chosen

So people will lose I'll probably lose Yeah don't worry about it I'm switching Buscemi Come play me Play me on Buscemi. I'm looking for a partner. Because the only thing I got left is...

Well, you got one, right? That one. Yeah, I got Cliffhanger. I got Buck Rubanzi. I got a comma. You got Henderson's. You got Garp. He's in so many movies.

Yeah. I know one list now that he hasn't been said yet. Is it my turn? Yeah. Yeah. I know one list that hasn't been said yet. Is it my turn? Yeah. Oh. Big. I think he was in Big. What?

No, I don't. The one where he's the bad guy and Denzel Washington is a good guy. Virtue, new realities. You're out.

That's the one I thought was Passenger 57, but it's Wesley Snipes who's in Passenger 57. Something like that. It's a good guy. Virtue, new realities. You're out. That's the one I thought was Passenger 57, but it's Wesley Snipes who's in Passenger 57. Something like that. It's one of those. Ricochet, that's what it is. Ricochet! Sorry, sorry, sorry. That's what it is.

Sorry, sorry, sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry. That might have been the one that we were going to say next. That was totally, I'm so sorry. Could have been the one we were going to say. Sorry. Amy Adams! So sorry.

I'm so bad. That was bad. I'm a bad boy. I'm a bad boy. Established. Alright, so you say big for your Hanks movie. And I will say

for Lithgow, I'll say I haven't seen it yet, but he's in this movie with Alfred Molina that's gotten a lot of raves called Love is Strange. Okay. I will say Rise of the Planet of the is Strange. Okay. I would say Rise of the Planet of the Apes. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Hey, guys, what's another Tom Hanks movie? Don't help her over there, you guys. All right. But I can't believe you're worried when you're only two Tom Hanks movies deep. I just, my brain. They're only all blockbusters.

Yeah. We gotta end this game soon anyway, so. We're gonna put, everybody's on a timer now. In the soup. Okay. Alexandra Rockwell. You need another Tom Hanks, Milana. I'm the captain now.

Yes, I'll accept that. Captain Phillips. That was its title in Europe, I'll accept that Captain Phillips That was its title in Europe I think That's what people call it on the streets I'll say Terms of Endearment Pat Well look Here's what's going to happen

Five seconds It's that other Brian De Palma one where he plays a couple of characters I'm out I'm done Five seconds It's that other Brian De Palma one where he plays a couple of characters. I'm out. I'm done. I know that he's... Five seconds. All right. How about Miller's Crossing?

No. He's not in that one. Miller's Crossing, 100%. Guaranteed. I'll bet anybody $200. I'll bet $100. He's definitely Miller's Crossing, 100%. No, he's cents. He's definitely Miller's Crossing.

No, he's not. He's... Yes. Yes. He was in most of their movies. He's in most of their movies. He's in almost

every Coen Brothers movie. He plays John Turturro's lover who shows up. Look it up. Sure. Actually,

I watched Miller's Crossing Because Steve Buscemi was in it Oh okay So that's why you've seen Most of the Coen Brothers movies Yeah That's why you've seen all movies Exactly yeah

Somebody should play The Steve Buscemi game Alright so it's back on me Maybe they're playing at home I'll switch over to Buscemi Let's show down Buscemi Yeah show down Buscemi Okay Reservoir Dogs

She's still in it No she isn't She's not? What? She said Captain Phillips. Oh, I was joking around when I said I'd accept that. Oh, okay. Oh.

All right. Well, then you should have given me a chance to really say it. That's not how Jeopardy works. Alex, just let me say what I meant to say. Which is the correct thing. Yes. I thought we were playing and bantering.

You said we were friends. On our way to being friends, I think is how I phrased it. I'm sorry? Nothing. Brent? All right, Pulp Fiction. Uh-huh.

He's the waiter in... I can't believe he changed the game and he's the last man standing. It doesn't seem fair. It's pretty sneaky. I just wouldn't... Yeah, sure. He went with his strengths.

It's sneaky. That's the strength of Stu Buscemi. Wait, are you still not doing John Lithgow anymore? I'm on Buscemi, Big Daddy. Alright. Billy Madison. He's in a lot of his movies too. I'll go with...

Oh, there's somebody counting down behind me that's funny I really do want to end this game anyway so I'm out One more Alright Trees Lounge I love how you're acting

like oh this is Of course Real quick John Lithgow though he was the bad guy in that Christmas movie Remember that one? It's not called

A Christmas Story Do you remember that one? You know the bad guy in the Santa Claus Santa Claus the movie that's right yeah it's true some point yeah yeah you can't win twice yeah the only thing worthwhile in that one real fun real fun playing with you Brent yeah I hope you feel real good about yourself I mean look you know John Lithgow come on you know how about we play Trivial Pursuit, but I'm going to play Cards Against Humanity? And by the way,

I've stolen all the pieces from Trivial Pursuit. And half the cards are snakes. Enjoy! Have fun with your Jenga. I brought a paddle ball. Oh, good luck with your Jenga. I brought a paddle ball. Oh, good luck with your Jenga. All right, you guys. We're going to play the Leonard Maltin game.

We're going to do it right. All right. Yes. Everybody's going to... The playing field is now leveled. There's no cheating. We'll start with... Can we play the Gene Siskel game instead?

We'll start with... I mean, if only Gene Siskel had an app. I know. That'll start with... Could we play the Gene Siskel game instead? We'll start with... If only Gene Siskel had an app. That would have been so good. That would have been perfect. Does Maltin know you only play his game because he has an app? I think so, yeah. Would he take it personally? Great.

I love how you banter with her. She also probably doesn't know that Gene Siskel is dead. What? I know that. Oh, you do? Poor guy. What a touching eulogy. He was good at the thumbs. May I reserve you for my death?

When I go, will you stand over my ashes and say, Sad. Say, aw, shucks, and then kick them off the Empire State Building? You're going to have your ceremony at the Empire State Building? Yeah, I want to take someone out with me. Okay. I want to brain someone with my urn. All right, we're going to start with Brent

and then go to Pat, Milano, John. All right, movies that Steve Buscemi was in. No, I'm just kidding. Go. And you get to pick the first category, Brent, between Celebrating Your Birthday Today, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, who I think is amazing. Everybody else likes her, too.

I'm not sticking my neck out on that one. It's her birthday today, so her films, films she's in. Known for her many, many movies. She's been in a handful. Our friend Bonnie McFarlane suggested the category Drew Barrymore or Less,

which is, of course, movies that have Drew Barrymore or less, which is, of course, movies that have Drew Barrymore or Kate Hudson. Very funny. At Pat underscore Dwyer suggested science, yeah! In honor of our friend T.J. Miller saying that in Big Hero 6. And that's science fiction movies

that Leonard really liked, three stars or more. So these are Leonard that's science fiction movies that Leonard really liked. Three stars or more. So these are Leonard's favorite science fiction films. Or movies with Barrymore or Hudson. Or Julia Louis-Dreyfus. Which one of those do you like? And wait, who's picking? Brent is.

What? Because he won that last game. I didn't win. I did not win. He won the game that he rigged? I did not. I did not win. I did not win.

I did not win. I don not win. I did not win. I don't consider it. That's fine. Aren't you glad you flew in? The way most people play this game, getting to pick the category, gives them very little advantage. I just hope you come to my funeral.

He'll be the one I kick off. I'll tell you exactly where to stand on the street. Let's do Drew Barrymore or less Alright, so Drew Barrymore or Kate Hudson Is in this movie You get to pick a year as well Would you like 2008 or 2009? Alright, 2008

Okay Two and a half stars from Leonard For this movie that he says is sweet and likable I can't find a negative thing in this review and you only gave it two and a half stars

sweet and likable and yeah good work by the cast this is not a bad thing in here And, yeah, good work by the cast. It's just not a bad thing in here. He just gives it two and a half stars. And he lists a lot of names. He lists eight, 10, 12, 14, 16 names.

How many names can you get it in? How about four? He says four names, Pat. What do you think about that? four. He says four names, Pat. What do you think about that? Six. We have to take your initial four. Six, but three of them are Buscemi. Change history

and put Buscemi in this movie three times and I'll play. Do you want a challenge? I'll play. Think you can do it less, Pat, or do you want a challenge? I'll challenge. All right. Say those magic words. Brent Weinbach, name that movie. Okay.

Pat, say those words. Pat, say the words. Oh, Brent Weinbach, name that movie that's not a Steve Buscemi movie. Yes, sir. That's not for sure. Oh. That'd be so amazing if he actually named Steve Buscemi. All right. Steve Buscemi was in themi Here's your four names I hope he does

Nick Zanno Marguerite Moreau Michael Urie And Eddie Sotelo Oh boy And he has a middle name and quotes P-I-O-L-I-N Piolin

Oh yeah okay Eddie Piolin? Oh, yeah. Okay. That's... Eddie Piolin Sotelo. That's the giveaway. Is that the giveaway name? Yep. It's over.

No. Any idea, Brent? Miller's Crossing. Okay. That is incorrect. Point goes to Pat. This movie is called Beverly Hills Chihuahua. Wow.

Wow. Was that an animated, like they had the chihuahuas and they animated their snouts to talk? They kind of talk, yeah. They all have celebrity voices. That's why there's so many names listed. All right. I couldn't have been more happy with how that went. All right.

So Pat has a point. We're going to start with John Hodgman and then move to Milana. John gets to pick a category. Would you like cocktail? And that's movies with drinks named after them at the bar at the Arclight Cinema here in Hollywood. There are some fun movie drinks on the menu, and I put those movies in the game. Oh, that's wonderful. I live in a different city. Inherent Lice?

Nobody here has memorized the Arclight drink menu. I highly doubt that. Or even looked at it. Inherent Lice, of course, is summer camp movies, and A Reptile Dysfunction is a movie where an alligator or a crocodile

attacks someone. Oh, that one. You like that one? Yeah, yeah, yeah. A reptile dysfunction. The year is 1980. Three stars from Leonard for this movie. This has got an alligator or a crocodile in it.

He says it has a knowing screenplay. Knowing. Yeah. It has a knowing screenplay. Knowing. Yeah. He also says an actress in the movie does a hilarious self-parody. Okay. And he also says you do not want to miss the graffiti in the final scene. Okay.

And then he lists. It looks like he's got about 11 names here 12 names 11 names how many stars for this movie? and it's 3 stars and if I get it

I get a point no if you get it Brent gets a point probably I mean to say does it go to Milana next? No, if you get it, Brent gets a point. Probably. I mean to say, does it go to Milana next? Yes. Okay, so he's not a factor.

So she's the one that could challenge you. Yeah, he's far from a factor in this round. He's in my head, obviously. Yes. That's the way to win right there. He could become a factor. Yeah, he's building a den in my head right now. You no longer like Steve Buscemi. Well, since this could possibly

benefit... I'm surrounded by cheaters. I have a hunch. I was offered a leg up. I did not ask for help. It was just given... Oh, the Chad thing. I forgot. I'm going to say zero names. He says zero names. Okay.

You fucking better name that movie John Yeah so let's hear it What's it called My feeling is that it's alligator Your feeling is correct Alligator That's good

And you know what he did it fair and square That's been in here for months and nobody Picks it up like how many movies have crocodiles And alligators in them? I knew when you said the category, I was like, he's going to do alligator. And then I was knowing screenplay because it's screenplay by John Sayles.

Oh, so you're knowing, that's for sure. I'm sorry to give you a peek into how the mind of a fair player works. It's scary. All right, John's on the board. Apologies to Put Your Hands Together. And we'll go back to Brent once again

and then to Pat. And Brent gets a bit between Tango and Cash, which of course is movies that have a dance contest in them. LOL Cool J, which is comedies with LOL Cool J. And Minerva Dreaming suggested The Babadookie. It's a play on

the horror film that's out now called The Babadook. The Babadookie, that's horror movies that Leonard gave two stars or less. So it's horror movies that Leonard did not care for. And it's not a genre he loves to begin with. Or LL Cool J or Dance Contest. Which one would you like, Brent? Alright, let's do the horror movies that Leonard did not care for. And it's not a genre he loves to begin with. Or LL Cool J or Dance Contest.

Which one would you like, Brent? All right, let's do the horror movies. All right. You get to pick a year again. Would you like 2006, 2010, or 2011? That's an awful lot of choices for Brent. It's all random. That's very interesting.

None of them are from the 1980s, that's just where I'm stuck. And so, let's do alright, let's do 2011. Okay. Two stars from Leonard for this horror movie from 2011. He says,

there's little here to get bloody excited about because he likes to have fun with language. What a night he must have had that night. Yeah. He's like, is anybody surprised by this movie? And he lists

a lot of names. There's six, nine, eleven, fourteen, nineteen names. Yeah. And I can't really pick out any other clues other than I'll just say that it's 111 minutes long. Okay. 19 names. You're taking 19? Sure, yeah. All right. Strong opening bid, Pat. That was Milana Vaynchuk listening.

I don't know if you're listening at home. Well, I can name it in 18. He says 18 names. Definitely. Pat Francis says 18 names. Pretty sure. How much did this guy say? 19. Doesn't matter.

I would really like you to name that movie. 17 names? I don't mean to yell at you. You couldn't name the movie in 17 names? It's at eight. I don't mean to yell at you. You couldn't name the movie in 17 names? It's a tactic. But just so you know, also, he'll also win, too. He'll win if you let him try to beat it right now.

But if... Right, because he's already got a point. Right. Take a moment. But what if I get a point from this? Then what happens? That would be great. Yeah, that would be fun. But it's just, I think what everybody's trying to say is that he's getting a lot of names.

I know that 18's a lot. Hang on, everyone, just be quiet for a second, because I think she's receiving transmissions from Chad in her earwig. Yeah, yeah. Telling her what to do. Chad? Oh, Chad says 17. 17 then? Telling her what to do. Chad? Chad? Oh, Chad says 17. 17 then? Chad would know what to do. Chad, what should I do?

17? Yeah. I'm gonna do 17. 16. Wait, you said 17? How many did you say, Pat? You said 18. I said 18. 19, 18, 17. 17. Okay. And John says 16, Brett. Ay. Alright. I'm gonna Alright I want to keep the game going

I think you can do it though For the sake of keeping the game What are you trying to keep going? We need to wrap it up buddy Name it Is that alright? What do you think? You guys are my chat What do you think? Should I ask him to name it? You guys are my chat. No, 15 names?

Yeah, what do you think? What are you, dumb? He's already named one without any names. You're right, you're right. Why would you give him 15 names? 16, actually. Just try to play this game like you're trying to win it. Like, play it strategically.

All right, all right, all right. I'm going to take the next step up, which is, what did you say, 15? I said 16. 16, 15, 15. He says 14. That said 15. I said 16. 16, 15, 15. He says 14. That's 13. Yeah. Name that movie.

Let's do it. I think you can do it. All right. Chad. Sorry, Chad. It's over. It's a horror movie. I like that you said that without any help from Chad, too.

It was just like totally. Oh no he's in my head. Oh he is. Okay. You have 13 names. You've become Chad. Okay. This is a horror movie in 1996. 2011. 2011. Great. Not too long ago. And your

13 names are Brittany Robertson Shanae Grimes Marlee Shelton Kristen Bell Anna Paquin Allison Brie Adam Brody

Anthony Anderson Marielle Jaffe Eric Knudsen Lucy Hale Mary McDonald and Nico Tortorella. 13 out of 19. Those last six might be very helpful.

Don't look to Chad. Any idea? Schindler's List. No, is it not? Always a fun guess, but that's List. No, is it not? Always a fun guess, but that's incorrect. I think Leonard gave Schindler's List a little bit more than two stars. I think he gave it two and a half

and called it sweet. With great graffiti in it. Yeah. But that was a lot of names. Does anybody on the panel know it? I have no idea. Paranormal Hostel. Just what's a horror

movie where they would have a big cast where there's pretty big names that are that low on the list? I know what you did a couple summers ago. Scream. It's a Scream movie. Scream 4 is the answer. But John Hodgman

is our winner. Fair and square. I mean, yeah, for kids listening at home, the only two people that have points are the people that played it Fair and Square.

John Hodgman. And you know what? That's why I cheated is because I wanted to show that lesson. I wanted to teach that lesson, actually. I was playing the role of the bad boy. And I cheated because I want to win. So that didn't work either. But Chad's got a good shithead on the back

that I'm going to read, right? There you go. So that worked out okay. Do you have anything you'd like to plug? Are we on the back that I'm going to read right yeah there you go so that worked out okay do you have anything you'd like to plug are we going to see is Lily going to do be in a Super Bowl commercial I don't know

you know no I have no idea when is the Super Bowl soon I don't know yeah soon so you didn't do one like with a football player

no I haven't made any of those special for the Super Bowl but I would like to plug my show that's coming out in April called Other Space on Yahoo cool thanks thanks guys But I would like to plug my show that's coming out in April called Other Space on Yahoo.

Cool. Thanks. Thanks, guys. Come back again before then. I have a question. Are you having a nice time having a national television ad commercial campaign? My life's so good, dude. I work like 20 days a year. Never forget this time in your life.

What's it like after? What happens after this? You will fly across the country to do podcasts. That's what happens. Pat Francis nailed it. You want me to talk into a thing? I'm on my way. No, I'll pay.

Don't worry. I'm on my way. No, I'll pay. Don't worry. I'm coming. What do you got to plug, Judge John? Well, everyone should listen to the Judge John Hodgman podcast, which you can listen to, download, subscribe, discuss, disputemaximumfund.org. I listen to real disputes from real people from all over the country and the world.

We had callers from Colombia and Australia last week. It was amazing. And I know how their justice system works. So they call up with their fights, and I tell them who's right and who's wrong. Wow. No matter what country they call in from? Yeah, because I know immediately who's wrong. I know immediately who's right.

And then it's just hearing them tell their dumb stories. Yo, do you know if it was Jay or Adnan? Yes. Okay. Who was it? I don't want to get into this, you guys. Okay. But listen to the podcast and you'll find out.

Maybe, yeah. What if I were, yeah. Listen to the, thank you'll find out. Maybe, yeah. Listen to the Thank You Very Much, Brent. You know what? All is forgiven, my friend. If you want to know who's really guilty in the serial podcast, tune in to Judge John Hodgman the next Thursday, whenever you're listening. Tune in, because that's when I'm going to reveal it. And I hope you don't remember that I said that.

I'm going to check it out. Thank you. I've never even listened to cereal. I mean, Rice Krispies on occasion. They make noise. They make three noises. Snap, crackle. Do you have any plugs, Brent?

Bob? Yes. So I made this short film, and it's called I Don't Dance. And it's not just like an internet video short. It's 20 minutes. And so you have to kind of sit down and make some time to watch it. Like you're going to watch, watch you know like 20 internet videos and um it's uh and you can watch it for free on vimeo.com just or you can search google just search brent weinbach i don't

dance and uh you know we have the my team and i put a lot of work into this this project and we're trying to get people to watch it and treat it more like it's a comedy record or something. I don't dance. It's a short film. It's about dancing. Vimeo.com Vimeo.com Check it out. Pat Francis, what do you got going on?

I got my podcast, the Rock Solid Podcast, comedy music podcast. Episodes every Thursday. You can follow us on Twitter at Rock Solid Podcast. It's a comedy music podcast. Episodes every Thursday. You can follow us on Twitter at Rock Solid Show. Thanks for coming back. Thank you for playing fairly. Thanks.

Had a good time? Here comes Brent again. Doesn't know how to follow the rules. I know. One little thing real quick. Has to add something else. I don't dance. Steve Buscemi's in it.

Oh, okay. No, no. He's not. He's not. That'd be so weird if that's all you wanted to do is get on the show and plug Steve Buscemi's in it. Oh, okay. No, no, he's not. He's not, but... That'd be so weird if that's all you wanted to do is get on the show and plug Steve Buscemi's

in your thing. Just check out stevebuscemi.com. He's just suggesting him for all the games. stevebuscemi.com. Check him out. Check him out on AOL.

I actually do want to check out stevebuscemi.com. What does that website look like? Last updated in 2001 by him. You could download some JPEGs of him on his wrestling team in high school. Dougloves Movies comes back to Austin, Texas at the Cap City Comedy Club on Saturday, January 31st.

At 420, all my dates are at DouglovesMovies.com. And this guy, my name is Justin. You didn't write a shithead on the back of your phone. Where is Justin? It's you? Can you't write a shithead on the back of your phone. Where is Justin? It's you? Can you tell me a shithead that I can say? Now they've got to think about it. Okay, they don't get one. I have some suggestions.

Okay, you'll say one. Oh, no, I don't want to. I was just kidding. Steve Buscemi? Huh? Okay, yeah, that's a good one. I'll go with Steve Buscemi. Thank you guys for being here. Let's hear it for all my guests. Lana and John and Brent and Pat.

And as always, the OG Willem Dafoe is a shithead. And Tupac is a shithead. And Tupac is a shithead. Yeah, that's a strange beef for a guy to have, especially with a Ghostbusters door thingy. And Steve Buscemi is a shithead! Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold,

his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you cause Doug loves movies!