Doug Loves Movies - Mark Normand, Michele Biloon, Jim Ginty and Doogie Horner guest

Episode Date: June 27, 2016

In another show live from the Helium Comedy Club in Philadelphia, Doug welcomes Mark Normand, Michele Biloon, Jim Ginty and Doogie Horner to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today's app is brought to you by IFC Films, Amazon Studios, and Wiener Dog. That's right, Wiener Dog, the new film from the director of Welcome to the Dollhouse and Happiness. Greta Gerwig, Danny DeVito, Ellen Burstyn, Julie Delpy, and Josje Mamet, did I pronounce that right? Star in the story about the wayward adventures of an adorable dachshund who passes from oddball owner to oddball owner, including the world's worst mom, a down-on-his-luck screenwriter, and the grown-up incarnation of Welcome to the Dollhouse's Don Weiner, whose

dysfunctional lives are all impacted by the adorably stoic pooch. Weiner Dog is in select theaters starting a few days ago. Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming baby sticky seeds with 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see because Doug loves movies. It's tight up here. Hey, everybody.

My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. That's right. I'm still getting set up over here. Because I'm serious. This shit is tight, y'all. Like, look at this. I put this here.

That's a great seat for you guys. Check out that hotel laundry bag for 90 minutes, my friends. So I'll try to deal with it. I'm going to pull it all together. We got an extra chair on stage because I got giddy yesterday and invited somebody to come back today. And where are the folks who were here from yesterday? Just two or three of you? Nice. I hope it was a decision you're going to be happy with to spend your whole weekend watching this. We're coming to you for the second day in a row from Helium Comedy Club in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I gave it more of a

Charlie Rose thing that time because I've got this big round table sitting next to me. It's Sunday, June 26, 2016. Let's name tag it up! Show me your name tags! Philadelphia? Oh, Lord. Phoebe 8 instead of BB 8 is an instant favorite.

It's a Guardians of the Galaxy, but how did you change it? What does it say? Dard Guardians of the Galaxy but how did you change it? What does it say? Dardians? Because your name is Darnell? Dardians Could you hand that to me? I just wanted to use it to illustrate a point

a little later on in the show oh there's some big ones up front there's a big Joey Diaz face in my face oh you got some good guesses there at the bottom about who the guests are going to be but not absolutely correct total

what? Gutshaw? because your last name is gut shawl okay and anna molehouse because your name's anna oh i'm getting so good at this after 10 years and i like how you're shining a uh on your sign. That's very ingenuitive. Or what? It's a phone? You got your phone out? Okay. Either way, good work. There's a big Am I Men in Black poster over there. And you're Men in Zack.

But let me see again. What's the... Wait, so are you coming out to everybody? Just couldn't resist that. Oh, that's me on there. Okay. I'm one of the men in Zach. Oh, I didn't read it yet. I was going to read the tagline on there.

It's a pretty classic tagline. I should use it on the show sometime. They're protecting the Earth from the scum of the universe. Yeah. Good job. Sharknado? No.

I don't care what you change it to. That is not a motion picture. That is TV garbage. But Sharon Nadeau is pretty good. All right. Doug Pluggs. Thanks for bringing the name tags, you guys. Doug Loves Movies is back at Meltdown Comics

in Los Angeles this Thursday night. And shows are coming up in Columbus. Oh. Pemberton, Canada. San Diego. Traverse City, Michigan. New York City, Boston and more

douglosmovies.com that's douglosmovies.com alright let's go through the prize bag real quick here on the table when I came out that was another thing that threw me off a little bit I had to inspect these things still not sure what they are

what are they? Douglas Movies. Tree ornaments? Christmas ornaments? Okay, I figured it out. Because they're like, yeah, they got a little string on them there. And one of them is this cool, it looks like DLM, like it's

a car company or a car logo. And then full-blown iHeart Doug Heart cameras. The logo. So that one's pretty cool, too. Are these, like, one-of-a-kind things, or are you going to make more of them? I brought you a couple more if you wanted to pass out.

You brought me a couple more to pass out? Wow, but is there going to, like, what's the end game here on this thing? I make those ones. You make them while you listen to the show and then you give them to friends and stuff? What would they retail for if you sold them?

I don't want to work anything out, man. I'm just saying. I'm just saying this is a promotional opportunity for you. I wouldn't insist on getting a cut because you're not going to get rich off of it. But if you wanted to make a little money and send them to people who'd be into it. I went to Hershey Park on Friday.

And so someone is getting my Hershey Park, what do you call it, commemorative souvenir cup. It's got a big Hershey man on it. And he's wearing a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup shirt. I guess he's the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup man. Oh, speaking of delicious treats, a cookie from my hotel. A Douglas Movies t-shirt. The bag's falling

apart. Ooh, some buttons. I got a button that's a catwoman's face. The Michelle Pfeiffer catwoman. So that's a good face. And people are like, what? Michelle Pfeiffer was catwoman?

And a don't leave the house alone button if you want to have something foreboding on your lapel then that's the button for you people will be like get out of my house button man I stay, you go People will be like, get out of my house button, man.

I stay, you go. And from my personal VHS collection, just for you guys, an episode of Felicity called Friends. I wonder if there's an episode of Friends called Felicity. And an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Always gets a cheer. The episode's called Consequences.

Yeah. Very exciting. All right, now, so, the young man whose name tag I took, he posted this today on Twitter, and I didn't write back to you because I didn't want to draw attention to it, but I wanted to write back,

Cheater, because your tweet said, I'm taking the day off from helium today to sit in the front row and watch Doug Lowe's movies. Awesome tweet, dude. You included this name tag where you cleverly used your inside information about who the guests were going to be

and have all four of today's guests on this motherfucking name tag. And one of them's head is a little small because I think they were a late addition. Thank God you hadn't changed Rocket the raccoon yet. Not the raccoon. Sorry.

People get mad about that shit. I'm so excited for volume two. And I'm going to give this back to you now. You're back in the hunt, fair and square. I'm so excited for Volume 2, and I'm going to give this back to you now. Back in the hunt, fair and square, we'll see if somebody picks your name tag, because they haven't been able to see it so far. They're all huddled back there,

and they're all on that poster I was holding. Please give a big, warm welcome to returning champ Dookie Horner and Michelle Balloon, Jim Ginty, and Mark Norman. Yay. Yay. What a polite group. Say anything. Hey, hey. There you go.

You're on my court there, Mitch. What happened? Sorry. She's on my court. All right. There you go. I'm back. You good?

Yeah, yeah. That was a close one. This is great so go. I'm back. You good? Yeah, yeah. That was a close one. This is great so far. I know. We're all pals. And begin. Okay. Let's meet our guests individually.

Who should we talk to? Let's talk to the lady first. Ladies first. Michelle, good to see you. How are you, buddy? Comedian by way of Los Angeles, now in Philly. Yep. Just went to Hershey Park this weekend, I hear.

I did. First time. I've never been to Hershey Park before. It was great. And you don't go on roller coasters. I don't. The last time I went on a roller coaster was with you, and never have again. Yeah, that's...

Okay, sure. I can live with that. It was terrifying. We went on the scariest roller coasters. It was terrifying. And it was high. It was really high. Did you feel I pressured you to go on them? No, it was the whole point. We were doing my podcast. I feel like we talked about this on the last Douglas movies, but it was for my podcast.

And you and I, we got really high, and then I went on scary roller coasters, of which I'm already afraid of roller coasters. I mean, that was not a new fact. And it was terrifying. Well, I'm sorry that you had to go through that. But, yeah, I've been back there dozens of times since, and I can't get enough of it.

It's a great park. I just love roller coasters. And, yeah, in Hershey Park, I still haven't gone to the zoo because I like roller coasters so much. But I've got to go check that out at some point. You should go to Hershey World because they have this thing there where you can make your own candy bar. Whoa. Which is, like, the coolest thing. Has anybody ever done that? Like do you have to bring the ingredients?

take a candy bar out of what's in your purse I got a tissue gum no it was great it's kind of like people are in hairnets and you get to pick what you want in it. I'm telling you, this was the best attraction in a weird part of a themed city that I'd ever seen.

It's such a cute city. I can't. I know. It was great. I can't get over it. I like to go every year. All right. Let's see who else we got on the panel.

We got a first timer down there on the end in a jaunty hat. Yes. It's Jim Ginty, everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Nice to be here. Thanks for having me. It's good to have you, man.

I was looking at your Twitter. Oh, shit. I didn't know that you lived in Philadelphia and New York. That's what it says at your Twitter. Oh, shit. I didn't know that you lived in Philadelphia and New York. That's what it says on your Twitter. I like to lie a lot. Yeah, right? But you're close enough in either case. Yeah, I go to New York.

Just get right over there. Yeah, and then I get kicked out and come back. That's what our friend Dookie does. I have two homes. I'm very wealthy. I'm bi-coastal on one coast. So, Jim, you've listened to the show now a few times to bone up, as it were. Yes, I have. So you're feeling good?

You think you're, you know, Doogie here is the champ from yesterday. Oh, really? Yeah, and Mark and Michelle are no slouches. Oh, really? Yeah, and Mark and Michelle are no slouches. Oh, thank you. Yeah, I feel fairly confident that I'm going to come in not last. Really? You should tell your face.

Yeah. I'm shooting. Is everyone high? Am I the only non-high guy? You guys are talking about making your own candy bars. I don't know what's going on. Yesterday, I forget why it came up, but there was a lot of talk about Hershey Fingers.

Oh, yeah. It's the most disgusting appetizer. Also, great black porn star. Hershey Fingers, coming at you. All right, good. There was talk about it in this episode too so oh sorry was that Joe? no it's all good that's Mark Norman everybody

hey hey hey hey good to be here good to be back how'd you get here from New York City plane, train, automobile the old Bolt bus. Whoa. Yeah.

Booked an Amtrak last night. It was $175, so I canceled it immediately and got a Bolt. So I got some trail mix and came on up. Well, thanks for doing that. I appreciate it because this is a packed room. It's a great crowd, but a few nights ago, you did

a set in Madison Square Garden. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. You remember that? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. This is your life, Mark Norman. This is your past week. It's no Hershey Park, but it was a good time. But that must have been crazy, right? It was unreal, man. It's no Hershey Park, but it was a good time. But that must have been crazy, right?

It was unreal, man. It was wild. A couple thousand people. I was trembling. I was terrified. I've done a few arenas with Schumer before, but this is the garden. It's got a stigma. So I was really shitting my own candy bar. Yeah, yeah.

You're making your own candy bars. How many people was it, though? It was about 14,000. Oh, shit. That's not a couple thousand. Yeah, well. I don't want to hurt the people. You get out on that stage

and math is the last thing you can do. Right, right. It's just people. Yeah. And then also, kind of your timing has to be different, but you said you did some other arenas before, so you're kind of used to that? Kind of used to it, yeah.

But I was so nervous, I rushed right in. I was having mini panic attacks every six jokes. You know, like, all right, you're going to be fine. Calm down. You're gay. You know, so I got it together, you know? You're so mean to yourself. Oh, jeez, you should see my parents.

You're so mean to yourself. Oh, jeez, you should see my parents. But yeah, it's not going great in this thing. But, you know, that's why I heard it with booze. Yeah, who's drinking right now? It's a pretty good drinking crowd, I think. I like how Doug asked you, how was playing Madison Square Garden, and you were like, I'm really depressed.

I wasn't? I'm gay. It's proof. It's proof that things like that, they don't bring you happiness. You have to choose. You have to work on being happy. Pretty heavy shit, right? Yeah, yeah, wow, jeez.

I got to work on that? Did you get laid after that show? I did. Okay, that's good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. All right. Yeah.

You know, because they say there's at least, you know, out of 14,000 people, probably ninth is Amy Schumer, right? So 9,000 of which are women. Right, right. Well, he was hot, the guy. But, yeah, it was fun. The guy I fucked. That was a joke.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mentioned I was gay. Yeah, because remember before. Yeah, yeah, right. We know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We get it. Not really gay.

Sorry to the fellas. It's fine, Mark. Yeah. We get it. Not really gay. Sorry to the fellas. It's fine, Mark. Yeah. And our returning champion is here. It's Doogie Horner, everybody. Thank you. Yeah, Doogie. I got all excited.

It's my show. So at the end of the show yesterday when you won, I just said, come back tomorrow. And I forgot. We're going to all be squished, when you won, I just said, come back tomorrow. Then I forgot. We're going to all be squished in here pretty tight. I'm excited to be back. I feel like I won't win today. I feel like I got lucky. I actually have a pretty poor record on the show,

so I was excited to win. Well, you know, you can go. There's a guy who keeps the records, and you can go and see what your records are. Yeah, he tweets at me sometimes. It always hurts. He's like, lost again. Oh, that's not

cool. You're at the bottom of the leaderboard. Zero and eight, doogie. Okay. But now I got, yeah, it was a thrill. It was a gas. Always is here at Helium. They say that in Angry Birds, the movie.

They're filling up balloons. And I forget what the... What are the creatures that are not the birds? Pigs. Pigs. Pigs are filling up some balloons, I think. Maybe it's the birds. One set of animals is filling up balloons. Really important to set this up properly. It's some sort of scheme against the others, I think. Maybe it's the birds. One set of animals is filling up balloons.

Really important to set this up properly. It's some sort of scheme against the others, I guess. And they're filling it with helium. And one of the characters says, apropos of nothing other than the fact that they're using helium, he just goes, helium, it's a gas. Which is exactly what I've been saying for years.

They probably got that from your show. I think it's a tribute, but it also is not even... It's just going to fly right by people and they're not even going to know why. Oh yeah, yes, helium is a gas. And you're filling balloons with it right now. You know what I mean?

You know it's there, and that's a touching tribute to... But people write to me on Twitter saying, they stole your line. I'm like, if it was a joke, I'd be upset, but it's just a fucking phrase. Well, I heard Borat stole your My Wife thing, too. Oh, I'm in a quandary. I might as well.

My wife! I saw it. I noticed it. I was watching the movie with my wife and she noticed it. My wife! I was talking to him yesterday, doing so many my wife's under my breath. Because you say my wife a lot. And we got to meet your child today.

Yeah, he came in. Your baby boy is here. Is he still in the room? They're out walking around. He can't really sit for too long. They got really good weed over in the park over there. Oh, good. If you want to just bring them in there, get them used to the smell.

That's great. Rittenhouse Park, that's the one. I'm just excited I remember the name of it. I could probably name only three parks and I don't even think Jellystone is legit. One of them is handicapped.

All right, so let's find out what everybody brought for the prize bag. Let's start with Jim down there on the other end. What do you have to give away? I think this is pretty special. Can I get it from the green room? Oh, it's in the green room? You go get it. This is my first time. That's okay. Go grab it.

We'll see you later. Alright, let's lock the door. Real quick, lock it. He was so fast, the door didn't even shut. Wow, that was quick. Oh my god, I didn't even know that Flash was pretending to be a comedian on the Eastern Seaboard.

Could you close the door, though? Where'd you grow up? In a comedy club that has a door? It's my first time. The Comedy Barn? Yeah. Iowa. That is a great club.

I think it's in Iowa. It's actually really good. Des Moines. What city is great club. I think it's in Iowa. It's actually really good. Des Moines. What city is that in? I think it's Des Moines, right? Sheboygan. I was trying to think of the funniest city. It's a funny word, Sheboygan.

It is. Wisconsin, yeah. All right, so Jim, what is that that you have for the band? Okay, I have a one-of-a-kind original Ari Shafir autographed poster. It looks like it's specifically autographed to someone that's not me or any

of you, but it's still, it's an autograph and this was like a one-of-a-kind deal. Like an artist did it specifically for Ari, so it's kind of You brought another comic's merch? Yeah. I actually tried to bring even more. I tried to ask and they didn't have any left.

Great job. You could just pass it down. I'll take care of it from here. Would everybody laugh if I just tore it to shreds? Yes. All right, Mark?

Oh, you have more? I have free passes to Helium Comedy Club. It's a great club. It's the helium in Portland. Good luck. I think we got the bolt bus. Thank you. Yes, good luck. I think we got the bullpuss. Thank you. Yes, thank you.

Yeah, and Helium in Philadelphia, the club that I think I once heard Ari Shaffir say to them, fucking great job this weekend. Maybe I read it on a poster. All right, so thank you for bringing that. How many of these passes do we have here? Four.

These are valid at any time, you guys. Any time. Nice. Like, right now, you could run out and come back in. If you don't like your seat, try to... Mark, what'd you bring? Hey, I got the box set. Complete sixth season of Buffy.

Oh. Yeah. Hey, I got the box set. Complete sixth season of Buffy. Yeah. It's on a more recent format, though, than the one I'm giving them. Oh, yeah. Yeah, but if they've got a lot of different old machines, they could really have a festival. Maybe have the DVD-VCR combo. Yes, the tranny of electronics. VCR combo. Yes. The tranny of electronics.

Transgender. Transformer. Sorry, sorry. Michelle, what do you got? Okay, so a very special another format that some people may have a use for cassette tape

wow we're really covering the somebody's got to have a real AV club in their home it looks like that came with your jacket finally finally and the cassette is called Denim Hits.

It was just before Yacht Rock started. But what is that cassette? Well, I started doing stand-up in Austin so he's near and dear to my heart. Willie Nelson, the best of Willie Nelson.

Yeah. He's a weed guy. And he's a and dear to my heart. Willie Nelson, the best of Willie Nelson. Yeah. He's a weed guy. And he's a weed guy, right? Marijuana. I probably say this any time his name is brought up. I smoked with him in his trailer one time. Oh, at his house? Quite an honor.

Yeah. His house that he travels the country in. In Austin, Texas. It was very cool. Cool. Thanks again. Jimmy Kimmel made that pot date happen. Nice.

It's adorable, right? Doogie. Oh. Do we have a... Can we fix Doogie's mic situation? Soundman just shook his head at me. I was like, my mic's not working. Can I...

And I looked at the sound booth and he just went... What do you want from me? I'm just the sound guy. So I brought a copy of Strange Tales. It's a Marvel comic. And it's got a bunch of different short stories from illustrators like Paul Pope, Jason, Kate Beaton,

Tony Millionaire, stuff like that. It's really cool. Right on. Jim, you're up. Last movie you saw. Oh. I saw very recently Wolf of Wall Street. I saw the full movie on whatever it's on, Hulu or Netflix.

And then recently they've been playing a lot on FX. So they edit out everything that's good about it. And I realized it becomes Boiler Room at that point. Yeah, it's just trailers, traders just screaming. Like they can't even say the swear word. They're just yelling. Exactly.

Like the dwarf tossing probably remains in the film. That's what I was going to ask. You know, that's a good question. How do you forget midget tossing? Well, I was flipping around. Oh, okay. tossing. Well, I was flipping around.

Oh, okay. It looks like Doogie's mic might be out for the whole show. Oh, shit. We'll just work. Fixed it. Soundman's like, just drop it. I dropped it. It starts working again.

There's got to be a name for a mic drop that happens because you're discarding a bad microphone. It's like the mic had amnesia and it got bumped on the head again. I remember how to amplify. Yeah, you just weren't tapping it hard enough. You were tapping it to see if it was on, but you should have just tap-fixed it.

Like an idiot, I was talking into it instead of smashing it against the floor. Fancy that shit. Ow. So, uh... Great. Great story, Jim. Thank you.

It's, uh... It's my first time on the show. Yeah. I like to, yeah, just easing into it. Absolutely killing it. Easing into it. You're in the dreaded Judy Gold seat. Uh-oh.

Uh-oh. God, I still have nightmares about that. Holy shit. Schindler's List. All right, we got it. You're a giant Jew. We got it. Jesus're a giant Jew, we got it. Jesus, she's terrifying.

Yeah, she's in Taming of the Shrew in Central Park. Yeah. And some people were telling me I should go to that and I was like, no thanks. Yeah, yeah. I've seen her act. No, I just it feels like, no thanks. Yeah, yeah. I've seen her act. No, I just

it feels like, you know, a lot of a lot of shrewing. Yeah. Because it's an all-lady cast. It's ladies playing the men and the women. Oh, fun. Yeah, right? Wait a second. Sorry. Mark, what was the last

movie you saw? I recently saw Trainwreck on a plane Which was a weird sentence I just realized I don't want no more Of these motherfucking trainwrecks On this motherfucking plane You had not seen it at that point?

I rewatched I was cut out of it, you know that. No, I did not. Who gets cut out of a Judd Apatow? They're eight hours long. But bonus scenes, hasn't it come out on DVD yet? I'm sure it has. I'm still up to Buffy.

Yeah, you're season six of Buffy. Yeah, you're probably in the deleted scenes because he does overshoot everything, but he also puts them in the scenes. Yeah, yeah. I didn't buy the DVD. I got vodka all over my notes, so I'm not crying. Oh, all right.

But yes, very funny. What I admire about that movie is it just tells a story, but it's all jokes from beginning to end. Lots of very quotable lines. Yeah, when we were on the road, we'd go out drinking, and she would just write in her hotel room. She's an animal. Good for her.

It's cool to get all this inside dirt on Amy. Yeah, like a workhorse. Behind the scenes, she's boring. No, no. She's a big whore. Does that help? By the way, vodka on your nose. Do you drink Coke?

What? What? Cocaine joke But then I realized coke is a drink Yeah that was the confusing part Yeah I ruined it Michelle I was in New York

Last week and I saw A wiener at The IFC Fred Willard was there You know the documentary about Anthony Wiener Oh there's also a movie out right now... Wiener Dog? Mm-hmm. Fred Willard was there. You saw, you know, the documentary about Anthony Wiener. Oh, there's also a movie out right now

called Wiener Dog. Yeah, yeah. Oh, no, not that one. This is just Wiener. Just Wiener. Just Wiener. What a weird confluence of a documentary

and it's the new Todd Sullivan's movie. Oh, that, yeah, that would be weird then if you, I did not know about that. Yeah, yeah. That is a weird thing.

Yeah, because I think it's open already. Wiener Dog's open already. Was it good? So you could have seen Wiener Dog in New York City over the weekend. They should do a double feature. Maybe in the same building where you saw Wiener. But tell us about Wiener. I haven't had anybody tell me about Wiener yet.

Oh, it's amazing. Has anybody seen Wiener? It's amazing. Yeah. We're all adults here. But no, it's about, it's know, Anthony Weiner and it's kind of like one of those things where the documentary is They they're following his life But things happen that I don't think he was aware was going to happen while they're shooting the documentary and they already have full access

And yeah guys the total attention whore amongst other types. They were already filming him when he got caught Wait, he got caught the first time, then said, I'm never gonna get caught again! And the Huma's like, I'm standing by you! Even though she looks like she just hates him the entire movie. And then he gets caught like three more times in the movie.

It's crazy. It's insane. And he's a live wire, that guy. He just likes sending people, it's his thing, sending people a picture of just he's a live wire that guy he just likes sending people you know it's his thing sending people a picture of his dick you know like if those people

don't complain why can't he be a politician great point you know he had a pretty solid I see him arguing with people he makes good arguments and stuff

he's a good politician but he was also like it went a little beyond that like you know he would like it was harassment it was phone sex But he was also, it went a little beyond that. It was harassment. It was phone sex. He was having like, if I was...

And he couldn't stop it. It was clearly like an addiction. And he was lying about it. But it's a great documentary. That's move one, I guess. In politics now, is just lie about it and hope that the follow-up stories are, you know, it gets quieter and quieter. Something else happens. Changes the story.up stories gets quieter and quieter,

and something else happens, changes the story. Right, Doogie? Oh, yeah. I can see you're really getting into that line of thinking. What was the last movie you saw? Green Room. Oh, that's good. I saw that.

That's it. I loved it. How recently did you see it? Since that kid died? No, I saw it a couple weeks ago. Okay. It gives it a whole new spin now. Anton Yelchin, who plays

Scotty in the new Star Treks, got his own car rolled over him in a driveway. It didn't just roll over him. It smashed him against a wall. I didn't want roll over him. It smashed him into a security gate. I didn't want to get real gross about it. Oh, I'm sorry. But anyway, it was a freak accident,

but also a vehicle that is being recalled. They're in the midst of doing a recall for that very problem that people get to park and roll down the driveway confused on the shift. So they're recalling those cars anyway. So he's the lead

in this movie Green Room that's very terrifying. And what he goes through in that movie is insane. It's a very intense movie. Then he just dies in this freak accident. So it's sad. He's a really good actor. He's only 27. Patrick Stewart's incredible in it.

Super badass. Yeah, he's like a white supremacist dude. What? Yeah. Sorry to bring the mood down. Finally. Wait a minute. Finally he's a white supremacist. Finally his haircut makes sense.

This is not a documentary. No. This is a real movie. That movie, Green Room is. Wait, I'm so confused. What happened to Picard? It's a movie, but then the main character in the film in real life died recently.

And then I mentioned Patrick Stewart. Ah, okay. In the movie, he plays a white supremacist, but in real life, he's not. Allegedly. And none of it was a documentary. None of it was a documentary. So the guy, Scotty,

is alive. No, he died in real life. Scotty from Star Trek? Alright, alright. And Star Trek's not a documentary either. What? Alright. I'm going to pretend to get it.

So we can move on. Anton Yelchin was also, if you want to go on an Anton Yelchin kick and see how good he was, he was in a movie that I liked a lot called Five to Seven. And it was about how he meets this woman in France,

women who are happily married and dudes that are also probably in relationships can just go have sex with each other from 5 in the afternoon to 7 p.m. And as long as it's in that window, everybody involved in the scenario is on board with it. And it's a big thing in France, apparently. Oh, wow. And that's why I'm moving to France. I wanted to announce... Yeah. Yeah, so he plays a young man who gets involved with a woman

who has a wife, a husband, and kids, and he's flipping out. She's just like, hey, just relax and fuck me. It's a really interesting movie. And I don't know where it's available right now. I didn't do any research. Is it out on VHS? Is that a documentary? What?

Nah, never mind. Five to seven. Not a documentary, no. Okay. Again, starring that actor who just died. He died? And he... Mark Norman joining us now.

Yeah. Unless we're talking about Amy Schumer He's not really paying attention She works hard Bert Kreischer you can turn off the podcast now Because this is the part where I say Let the games begin! Are you ready, Philadelphia? Oh, what a lovely, lovely crowd.

They've got name tags. You guys have to pick them. I do not envy you in this situation. Let's start with Doogie. Who are you playing for, Doogie? I'm playing for... I'm a little confused because it's a giant plush donut that says Samantha, so I'm not sure what movie it's supposed to be a play on. Oh, it's...

I think this particular donut is a... Simpsons donut? Maybe? No? Just a donut? For the show. Just your hemorrhoid donut? Is it for a particular movie?

No? Okay. I'm playing for Samantha Donut. Donut, say the shithead on the back of this. That's not what it says, but I had fun with the word donut. Wait a minute. We don't read the back. Michelle?

Yeah? You got a BB-8 on a stick. Yes. Yes. State Fair time, everybody. It's like a Chinese lantern or something. Yeah, I love it. BB-8.

BB-8 and playing for Phoebe. And Phoebe, yeah, Phoebe 8 put her face on there. Uh-huh. Clever. She's all like, beep-boop-bop-boop-beep-boop. Woo. That's always my favorite when it goes, woo-woo-woo. He's like, oh, brotherop-bop-boop-beep-boop. Woo. That's always my favorite, when it goes, woo-woo-woo. He's like, oh, brother.

Oh, yeah. He really just cursed somebody out. Swearing under his breath. And, uh, Mark's got his hand up his name tag. Arr. Arr. Yeah. It's a pirate puppet.

It's a pirate, yes. Yeah. That's weird. Should I read it? Sure. It says, Patrick's of the Caribbean. Yeah, there you go. You get it?

Yeah. Yeah, I've always thought people with puppets were weird. So I wanted to meet the guy. Yeah. He's weird. Well, you know, Mark, if your arm doesn't get tired, the pirate can help you play the games today. You can...

It's really coming to life right there on your hand. I get it now. It's fun. What can you do with the... You got, like, the Kermit the Frog stick hand going on on the one side. What can you... I can do a Heil. Oh. Ha ha.

Wow. Attack of the Nazi pirates. He thinks there's a whole battalion behind him. He's the only guy. He's the only crossover. Pirate Nazi. Yeah. Potsy as we like to call them.

Right. What else can he do? That's it? I don't know. I think he's homophobic. I don't know. Can he touch himself? Oh, yeah.

There you go. He's patting himself. Well done. Well done. That's all he's got. His hand's asleep. Hey, slow down You don't want that thing to turn into a hook

I'm going to shoot yarn all over you Alright Well Hope people brought their kids And Jim you took the bait I took the bait yeah You picked the cheater name tag

Yeah he put all of our pictures on it Guardians of the Galaxy And he's I think he's the only black guy here So I felt the need to That's good as raising as any I think Yeah that was the main one But your face is on a rocket That's good as reason as any, I think. Yeah, that was the main one. But your face is on a rocket.

Is it? Yeah. That's Bradley Cooper, baby. Oh, shit. Yeah, I get mistaken for him all the time. Philadelphia's own Bradley Cooper. All right, we know where we are. I saw that porn... Silver Linings cock block.

Really? Yes, all scenes of people just blocking cock. Huh. Did you just have to mic drop again to get it to work? Oh, this time it didn't work. That's the only thing it'll do. No, it's not the upside down thing. There it is, there it is.

I have to hold it like I'm a boxing announcer? Yeah, there you go. Introduce Rocky Balboa. I'm gonna knock you out! Some people prefer excellence in sound design and they just leave the show if they don't care for what's going on.

I'm sorry, lady. Get your money back at the door. I love when microphones don't work at comedy clubs. It's like, you gotta do two things. You need lights and a microphone. That's all you need. How much simpler could the tech be? They can't fucking nail it.

Well, you heard me. Last time you see Doug here at Helium. It is always, you know, any time I do a show in a club where I need four or five mics they tend to have to kind of run around and scuff some mics because usually they only need most two at a time when the Sklar brothers come by

God almighty so you know I can't blame them for that but let's play some games we got about 45 minutes left on the clock and I think I got four fun games lined up for us to play. This first one is called Doug Loves Musicals. Oh, shit.

I'll name the songs in a movie musical. First person. On stage only, please. To blurt out the correct title. Now I wish I was gay. Damn it. Too bad you're not. That would help.

Straight people, I think there's straight people that could figure this out. All right, all right. Maybe not, we'll see. Yeah, so you gotta yell out the correct title. What movie musical had these songs in it? There's a song in it called Yours, Yours, Yours?

No? Okay. There's a song called Mama Look Sharp. Can we re-guess if we guess wrong? Yeah. Mamma Mia! No, no, no! No! Oh, there's no penalty for guessing wrong? There's no penalty.

Oh. Yeah, I apologize for not saying that in the beginning, but it doesn't seem to have affected the outcome. Still have no guesses. Is anybody there? Moulin Rouge. Nobody? No. What? Hairsin Rouge. Nobody? No.

What? Hairspray. No. He Plays the Violin is the song. Fiddler on the Roof movie, right? That's a fun... You could have won it right there if you were right. See, you're good at this. The Egg is a song. The Egg?

Yeah. Chicago. Maybe it's Twitter the Musical. Oh, his mic's out again. Hand to God? No. Molasses to Rum. Ah, Porgy and Bess.

Nope. Ah, Porgy and Bess. Nope. Why is that funny? Isn't that an old slave song? If we hear you shout it out, you'll get the benefit of the doubt if your mic goes out. Yeah, yeah. Just be loud and clear.

I got nothing either way. This one might put you on the top. You might figure it out because the song is called Piddle, Twiddle, and Resolve. Mary Poppins. Piddle, Twiddle, and Resolve. My Fair Lady? Mm-mm.

Music Man. Nope. No. Till Then is a song in this musical. Sit Down, John. It's a fucking song. Sit Down, John.

In this musical. Sit Down, John. Sounds like a good song. Johnny, won't you sit down? Sit Down, John. There's a song called The Lees of Old Virginia. Oklahoma. No. No. No, John. There's a song called The Lees of Old Virginia. Oklahoma. No.

No Oklahoma. You can tell us the name of the musical and we wouldn't be able to guess the musical. All right. See, that's part of the joke of this game is that there's always a song in the movie musical that is the title.

And when I say that one last, it's the first one who can repeat it back. We're almost there. Meet Me in St. Louis. No. Good guess, though. Did I say Fun Home yet? Here's another one that might give it away, maybe. But Mr. Adams.

Adams Family Values. There's a song. I was thinking the same thing. There's a song called But, Mr. Adams. They do what they want to do, say what they want to say. The Adams Family. You've rapped a lot on this show.

Too legit. Yeah, that's... MC Hammer did the Adams Family Values rap or whatever it was called. Alright, I gotta see all your mouths. Because the last one is... 1776. John Edelton.

Dang. Addams Family won! Adam's family won. All right, so by my count, Michelle won with the correct answer, 1776. I've never heard of that. I've never heard of that. I've never heard of that at all. I've heard of the year. It's an old-ass musical about the signing of the Declaration of Independence.

That's why they have to say, sit down, John. And, but, Mr. Adams. Oh, I see. He plays the violin. Piddle, twiddle, and resolve. I don't know how it goes. It just seems like if you just sing those words, you're singing it. But, yeah, so that, yeah, I did that in honor, of course, of being in Philadelphia.

And yeah, congratulations for getting it, Michelle. Yay! That means Michelle gets to go first in this next game. ABC, these nuts! These old plantation nuts. All right. We're going to, it's a spelling game, Michelle. I'm in. We'll start.

That's my thing. But you don't have to actually spell. I mean, you need to be able to spell. I might spell. Because I think you know how to spell. I've been noticing all over town, people are so excited this month because right now at all Wawa's see you hear the excitement

about Wawa people love people love Wawa they love Wawa right now we're in the midst of it's one of my favorite times of year to be in Philly because right now in progress is Wawa

Hoagie Fest. There's no bands or carnival rides. You just get a hoagie. Gotta love Hoagie Fest. So today we're going to spell Wawa Hoagie Fest. Wow, that's a lot. Michelle gets W.

You can name any movie that begins with the letter W. Super easy game. But if you match the movie that I wrote down in advance without giving you any clues, then you win automatically. And if you can't think of one, when it gets to your letter, you're out. The next person has to do that letter.

So don't think too far ahead of yourselves about which ones you're going to get to do. Okay. W. Where the wild things are. Very good. This is any movie? Any movie that begins with W. Now you, Mark, you get the letter A.

But let me tell you what I wrote down for W. I picked witness. Witness, yeah. Okay, A for Mark. A Few Good Men. Mm-hmm. I went with Atlantic City. All right.

Doogie. Wait, what about Jim? W. What about Jim Gibson? Sorry, it's my first time. Poor Jim, I'm down on the end Just, you know, keeping everybody on their toes W for Jim

I would like to say Wild Wild West Alright One of the more racist mainstream I'm playing for a black guy Oh, so it's okay It's a theme He turned down the Matrix to do Wild Wild West Really?

Yeah Good call Fun fact The Wild Wild Matrix The Wild Wild Matrix Wiki wiki Come on, come on Wild Wild Matrix Wicky wicky Come on come on Wawa Matrix

Yeah Wawa Matrix Come on I went with Wide Awake Um Wawa A is the next letter for Doogie Adam's Family Values

Oh shit They do what they want to say Say what they want to say Wear what they want to wear Wawa. A is the next letter for Doogie. Adam's Family Values. Oh, shit. They do what they want to say, say what they want to say, wear what they want to wear. I went with Alpha Girls, a satanic sorority slasher. I was going to guess that. It was shot in Philadelphia. Oh. Yeah, pretty neat.

H for Michelle. Now, are we doing the, the like when you're alphabetizing things and the doesn't count I don't count the only counts for the letter T in this game so oh

so I have to the H has to be the first word right you can't say the Hunger Games for H and if you say it

for T I also would be displeased no I wouldn't give it I wouldn't care And if you say it for tea, I also would be displeased. No, I wouldn't give it. I wouldn't care. I'm going to have to go with... So mad about the movie you said? Happy.

Happy? Yeah. That's a movie, right? Did you just panic and you're just saying happy? It's a movie. It should be, right? Yeah. Who's saying happy? It's a movie. Who's in it? It's like an indie movie, right?

Are you thinking of Smiley Face? Or Happiness, directed by Todd Sullins? Oh, maybe. I think there is a happy. I'll give you happiness if you want to go happiness. Happiness. I feel bad about taking that because I feel that I didn't remember exactly. Somebody's saying there's a documentary called Happy.

Also not what I was thinking of, but I'll take, if it leaves me in the game, I'll take that. I went with High School Musical 3 because it was shot in Salt Lake City, Utah, and I'm going to be there on Tuesday. I always like to scope out the schools in advance. Check out some of the film locations. Oh, there's the exit right there.

Okay, good to know. All right. What's the next letter? Oh, because we're spelling Hoagie fast. On the waterfront. Good choice. That's all right. That's a movie.

I went with out for justice. Is that Steven Seagal? Mm-hmm. Interesting. Is that Steven Seagal? Interesting. Steven Seagal came up yesterday, right? Yeah, that's why I was... I couldn't think of any Steven Seagal movies.

Danger Train? Action Squint? Dark Territory. Yeah. Alright. Whose turn is it? the new guy Jim Ginsey it's my first time

I'm going to forget you every time that's fine you're so far away A? yes okay can I go with Alfie? which one?

Dudley Moore Dudley Moore right Dudley Moore. Right? No, the other one. No, you could have said Michael Caine or Jude Law. That's what I meant. I meant Michael Caine.

There's no penalty for that, but it was funny, though. I just really like Dudley Moore. I went with A History of Violence. Mm-hmm. Okay. Yep. Mm. Mm-hmm. Okay. Yep. Sure.

Mm. The big finale at the end of A History of Violence. It's a really good movie. The end of the movie takes place in Philadelphia. How do you fuck that up? Remember? How? Yeah, William Hurt's so funny.

He's just in that end part, and he got an Academy Award nomination for that. Great oral scene as well. It's crazy. Yeah, on the stairs. That movie's nuts in every direction. Yeah, yeah. It's crazy and you see some nuts. Yeah, yeah. And labia.

Who's next? Me Really? Yeah G Gremlins 2 The New Batch Nice That's fun Yeah don't get them wet

I went with Labia Don't feed them after midnight You have to say it it's one of the rules I went with God's Pocket which Jesus that's a great name for a vagina

it's set or a region because it's set in South Philly and what I assume is a neighborhood they call God's Pocket. And Philip Seymour Hoffman was one of his last things that he was in. I think it's Kensington you're talking about. Oh, that's God's Asshole. I'm sorry.

I got it. Local humor coming through. Hometown crowd turning turn it up. I don't know if I was making a boat or a train just now. The letter is I. Inside man. Who? Uh, okay.

I think it's the inside man. I don't think it is. Ooh, I don't know. Could go either way. I gave you two that you could say, either In Her Shoes or Invincible. Yeah. Invincible, of course, the great title

where it's about a guy named Vince. And you go inside and he plays football. Invincible. Yeah. Join us now as we go inside Vince Bull. E is the next letter. What's that? E.

Oh. Hoagiefest. E. Sorry. E. Oh, jeez. The pressure's on. Sometimes if you just make a long E sound,

the rest of the words will tumble out. E.T. There you go. People want the full title. Do you know the full title? Extraterrestrial? Close enough. And it's Adventures on Earth.

Shush. What is this? Turn Doogie's mic off again. What did I tell you? What did I say before the show started? Oh, I see. One of Mike's is weird. Give it to Doogie.

Fix his in. All right. We're down to the fest part. Oh, I got to say my E was Evan Almighty. Ah, yes. Yes. Which is partially shot in Buffalo, New York, and I'm gonna be at the Helium there on September,

or August 2nd. August 2nd. That's coming up quick. F. F. I'll go with an obvious. Can I go with Fargo? Yeah. It's a real good one. Good movie. I went with Fat Albert. Also a good movie.

It was partially filmed in Philly. And so there's probably some people's names from here that are involved in the court action. I don't know. I don't think Bill had anything to do really with that movie I think he just, you know, Keenan Thompson played him which is so funny that he played Fat Albert in a movie and then later is on SNL doing sketches about Bill Cosby being a rapist it's like, wow, that's an interesting career trajectory

which is probably why he's happy to do those jokes because he probably wants to be disassociated. They're never going to show that movie anymore, are they? Probably. They don't already. Hey, hey, hey! There's a real bug problem up here today. Yeah.

I think it's just me, too. I think this is a fuck one of those weed bugs. Quit trying to suck the weed out of me. Hey, hey, hey is also what a lot of those women say when they wake up. Ha, ha. Ha, ha. Hey, hey, hey. Where are my pants?

Hey, hey, hey. Rape's not okay. No? Nobody? New guy. It's my first time. Last time. Doing great, Jeff.

Who gets E? Me. Okay. Escape from New York. Excellent choice. I said Exotica. Huh? I feel like they could have shot that in Philadelphia.

They could have, yes. A post-apocalyptic wasteland. They also did not film Exotica, is what I went with. It wasn't filmed here, but it is set in Toronto, and I'll be there at the Royal Theatre on August 4th. Now, Michelle, I think you can do this. I'm very excited. I got it. I got this one.

I think you've got it. I think you can win this. I'm very excited. I got it. I got this one. I think you've got it. I think you can win this particular game right now. You're making it sound like you picked a really obvious one, but I'm just going to go with my... I feel like this is the one I thought of, Sliding Doors. Okay. A lot of these have been movies that take place in Philadelphia. Oh, shit.

And we touched on a movie earlier. I made some stupid take place in Philadelphia. Oh, shit. And we touched on a movie earlier. I made some stupid porn joke about it. Oh, shit. I wrote Silver Linings Playbook. Oh. Ah. Yeah. So that comes down to you, Mark.

T is the last letter in Hoagie Fest. What's a movie that begins with the letter T that takes place in Philadelphia? I'm going to give you that little leg up. All right. You're still not going to get it. The Liberty Bell. No, no, no, no. Great movie.

Who cracked it? No. It's a detective flick. I'm just going to say The Truman Show. I don't know what's shot here. The Philadelphia Story. Ah, damn it. I thought you were going to say 12 Monkeys.

Was that here? Yeah, that was shot here too. Oh, shit. You just told me that you would have, like, you know, harumphed the. Yeah, I sure would have. No, it was more specifically the Hunger Games was what I was going for there. But yeah, of course, sure.

I play mind games with my guests. The tricky part is I don't know what I'm doing. So that really fucks with you. This is a game that's brand new that we're going to play right now. We beta tested it on one episode, and I thought it was a fun idea that gets tough really fast the way we played it.

So I've come up with it. Someone on Twitter suggested a new approach to this, and I liked it. And a name. Also suggested a new approach to this, and I liked it. And a name. Also suggested a name for it. The game is called How High Can You Get? I'm winning so far. But now you guys get a chance.

I would like to play this one too, I think. So nobody really won that last game, so Michelle, you still get to go first. All right. But we'll switch the order around. We'll go Michelle, Doogie, Doug, Jim, and then Mark. we're going to get a... People in the audience start thinking of these.

We need a genre, just a type of movie that there's lots to choose from. And then each one of us has to go down the line and name a one-word title that fits in that genre. MALE SPEAKER 1 AND MALE SPEAKER 2, Wait a minute. Oh, boy.

MALE SPEAKER 1 AND MALE SPEAKER 2, You can't take a one. You're out. And everybody that's in, then we have to go down the line and do a movie that's got two words in the title. MALE SPEAKER 1 AND MALE SPEAKER 2, Holy shit. MALE SPEAKER 1 AND MALE SPEAKER 2, That's from that genre. And we build until we get to, you know, everybody falls out because it gets too hard. Too fast. The Viagra story.

All right. So raise your hand if you thought of a good genre. This dude right here in the front row has an amazing shirt on. You're welcome. 80s movies? I'm going to murder you. Is that a genre now? Well, I am terrible with years, so I'm going to be sitting here naming movies from 2012.

What about the hot guy there? But that was... Well, you know your crowd. It's like Comic-Con at the DMV here. So I see one muscular chap. He stands out, you know? All right, muscular chap. What have you got for us? What?

Heist movies. Ooh, those are tough. That's a pretty tough one, I think. I think there's? What? Heist movies. Ooh. All right. Those are tough. That's a pretty tough one, I think. I think there's a movie called Heist. There's one. Yeah, too bad you don't get to go first. Might be The Heist.

Yeah, we might all. No, I think there's one that's straight up Heist. All right. I was hoping somebody was going to say Dark Game Show Documentaries. King of Kong? Oh, no, that's say dark game show mockumentaries. King of Kong? Oh, no, that's not a game show. All right, so maybe we'll get another suggestion if this flames out real fast. Michelle, can you think of a heist movie that's just one word title?

Yeah. Heist. Good call. Good call. Sorry about that. I like it. You're a strong competitor. And then. Good call. Sorry about that. I like it. You're a strong competitor. And then I win it.

Okay, Doogie, can you think of one? Yes. Heat. Ugh. Oh, man. Yeah. Yeah. Good job.

Greatest, nice movie. Good job. Good job. That's legitimate. Oh, shush. Can't you see I'm thinking? I can see. I can see.

No, you can keep talking. I might have a loophole with this one. God damn it. Well, yeah, that's the thing also. It might lead to some debate sometimes. Yeah. But I got one. A James Caan movie called Thief.

Jesus Christ. Yeah. Jim. This is a dumb category. Oh, I got one. So you don't have one? Annie? Do they?

All right. We're robbing a bank. We're going to get more rich. Orphans are always stealing, right? Yeah, they're all rich already. Annie moves into a mansion pretty much ten minutes in. Those sticky-fingered orphans, right? Yeah.

Maybe not ten minutes. They drag out the orphanage shit just to get you really hooked in. So, yeah, you're out. Okay. Cool. Mark yeah, you're out. Okay, cool. Mark? Do you have one? The is out. It's just one word.

Unless the movie's called The. Doesn't matter either way. All right, I think it's a heist. Ronan. Yeah, that sounds heisty. Oh, yeah. Yes, nice. Good job. And we're all done. Now we that sounds heisty. Nice. Yes. Nice. Good job.

And we're all done. Now we go to two words. Oh, two words. And Michelle starts us off. The gym is out for good. This is going to be a legitimate one. Ocean's 11. Yay.

That was my loophole. Nice job. Ocean's 13. I left you one. Don't take it. Don't take it. Don't take it. Oh, it hurts.

Money train. Wow. You're welcome. Well. I could. I could play the game here, but I'm going to go on a long shot. What?

You have one. You got this. You have one. I'm going to go on a long shot. What? You have one. You got this. You have one. I'm going to take a risk. Okay. This is going to hurt. But the professional is a murmur I guess that part of the

Reason that The cop's going around killing people Is because he's a dirty cop and he's trying to steal something Right? No? He's trying to steal something for the kid Or drugs, it's about drugs He takes that weird thing Where he cracks it and then he goes No? He's trying to steal, you know, something for the kid. About the drugs? It's about drugs?

He takes that weird thing where he cracks it, and then he goes... Right. Always looks up at the ceiling when he does it. Yeah, the... Real charmer in that movie. Ocean's 12. All right, you're in.

Michelle. The new guy's like, what the fuck? Yeah, I got a really good one, too. Oh, yeah, what's yours? I'm ready to go. The score. Oh, nice, nice. All right, Michelle, three words.

Okay, first I want to order an Amcel, if anybody's listening. The Muppet Caper. Holy shit. I'll give you a chance to change your answer. Had nobody say anything but me. And Michelle. Oh, yeah. What?

You got to change your answer. That's not the right title. Oh, man. Sorry. That had to sting The Italian Job There you go Oh my god

What is the right Please What's the real name Of the movie Oh you'll hear it When we get to another round I've gotten a lot of reprieves. Thank you.

Dukes. Small Time Crooks. Ah! That was mine. That was mine. Very good. Shit. Heist.

Heist. Sorry, Mark. Oh, I got one. I got one. Out of Sight. Nice. Great movie. I like the right one.

Oh. We got an Oh there's your drink Let's hear it for the staff Yeah They all get really high on helium That's why they're good At what they do

You just Sometimes you have to Pull them down from the ceiling It is a gas Thank you ma'am Sometimes you have to pull them down from the ceiling. It is a gas. Thank you, ma'am. Her mic's broken, too. I always think of hate.

Whose turn is it? What's happening? I got a one-word one. Oh, I see. I got a two-word one. Looking for that big three. What one did I say? Oh, I got it! You said out of sight.

I got one! I can't believe it. Oh, my God. That just hit me. What is it? Set it off. Set it off. I like it.

I don't know where that was buried. Wow. That's some real F. Gary Gray matter right there. Oh. I think he directed it. Gary Gray matter right there. Oh. I think he directed it. I don't know. Michelle. Oh, Jesus.

Four words. I've got a five. Maybe. You could come up with a four right now. Then that five is going to come in handy. The Great Muppet Caper?

That's correct. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Thank you. Yeah. That's how these games should be played. Sit there and figure this shit out.

This is exciting. Doogie. The Great Train Robbery. God damn it! Good one, good one. You can do The Great Waldo Pepper. That's about plane flying. Oh, I know, but it'd just be fun, you know. I was so excited

about Great Train Robbery. Fucking new guy. All right. You guys are going to hate me for this one because it's got, it's a contraction, but it is the title, and that does count as one word in my book. Oh, boy. Who's minding the mint?

Yeah, that's right It's a comedy starring Timothy Hutton's dad Wow As a guy who works at a mint And he gets together with a bunch of the Disgruntled employees that are all comedians Actors, you know, they're comedians

And they rob the mint What's his name? Gilligan is in it. Bob Denver. And, yeah, they robbed them in it. And it's a heist movie. You're welcome. You got a four-word one? Oh, yeah. Do I get to go?

No? Am I out still? It's not supposed to go on this long I'm sorry I got one Let everybody that's in play go first And then you can add one Just to show people you know stuff I see how it is

What's yours Mark? Four? The Thomas Crown Affair Oh fuck yeah Good job Was that yours? The Thomas Crown Affair. Oh, fuck yeah. Good job. I'm back. Was that yours?

Go get that art. Go get that art. Yes. All right, Michelle. We're up to five. Okay. My problem is that the five-word one I had I think is actually six words. Say it real fast and maybe nobody will count but I'm going to say it

how I want it to be it gets so hard for us to keep track you can probably slip it by us lock, stock, and smoking barrel wait wait lock, stock, and two smoking barrels yeah that's two that two is a word in there

could be a number is that how the game is played oh lord but again thanks for a future one fuck It could be a number. Is that how the game is played? Oh, Lord. But again, thanks for a future one. Yeah. Fuck. Well, maybe I'll be lucky enough to give it to myself again.

Uh-huh. If I just get it. Man. We need a fiver. I need. Is that a baby? Somebody had a baby sneeze. Baby, that's fine.

That's only four words. Yeah. I don't got it. I'm out. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Well, thank you. It's a great job.

Thank you. You're welcome. Stick around for the next game. Maybe chat with the new guy. No. Harsh. Doogie. Die hard with a vengeance. Jesus.

Yes. Nicely done. Nicely done. Here's mine mine You ready? Fun with Dick and Jane Oh Come on I love this game

Even with a shitty one like Heist We're doing pretty good That was the hot guy He's getting ready for a heist. Yeah, he's gonna heist some tank tops. He just ripped off two sleeves. Surrounded by puns here. Or is that a pun? That wasn't a pun. It's just a dumb joke. Okay. Whose turn is it, Mark?

Oh, yeah. You ready? Yep. Who's minding the mint, too? Who? Ah, shit. Um... Star Wars The Phantom Menace.

That's not even the right number of words. I mean, that's not... You have to take part of the title out. That's five? No, but they've got the numbers in there. Oh, episode whatever. But also not a heist. Either way.

It was the losingest title you could say. But good job. I think I'm out there. We got pretty far. Did you have one with five, Doogie? I did one. Wait, Doogie? I did one. Wait, what? He did Die Hard.

Oh, so now we're at six. We're now at six. Oh, shit. You two. Lockstock and two smoking barrels. Yeah. Thank you, Michelle. Don't touch my microphone.

It'll melt And I think I have a seven also You can't just say seven Because that wasn't a heist movie Yeah a movie with seven words I just thought of one that's five I was so excited it might stretch out to six. Maybe this city, town, name, or whatever it's supposed to be,

is two words. You get stutter when you say it? There's a movie called The Great Northfield, Minnesota Raid. Jesus. But is Greenfield one or two words? I think it's just one word. You said Northfield or Greenfield you said it two different ways

North the great North fuck it the corrections department will tell you all about it the next episode Doogie is our winner, everybody. Let's hear the seven. Yeah, the heist man needs to know a seven.

I think I got this right. It's a mad, mad, mad, mad world. Ooh. Are there four mads or three mads? There's four mads. Yeah, so it's a mess. Three wouldn't be that crazy, but four is way too long. I gotta see this. Yeah, so it's a... Three wouldn't be that crazy, but four is way too long.

I gotta see this. Yeah. Shit. I think I just thought of a six. Oh! Let's hear it. Ooh, I just got a one. No, just kidding.

Snatch! Yeah. Yeah. If we go all the way back to one, sure. And labia. Yeah. Yeah. If we go all the way back to one, sure. And labia. Yeah. Alright, well congratulations on that one, Doogie. Let's finish this thing up

with a quick round of Last Man Stanton. We got somebody from Twitter thinks they've got a perfect name. Just to remind my guests on stage, we're just going to take turns naming movies that the person in the audience suggests. Oh, right, right, right. Actors or actresses.

You had some crazy speed version of it you had us play on an episode once, Mark. Yeah, yeah. I forgot how that went, but we're just doing it regular style right now play on an episode once, Mark. Yeah, yeah. I forgot how that went, but we're just doing it regular style right now. Alright, well, thanks for bringing it up. That was the best night of my life. You know, now that I think of it, Annie could have been a one-word heist movie because she really stole our hearts.

Hey! Boy, there it is. She's been sitting on that one. They tried to steal Danny Warbuck's money, right? Do they? I mean, it's a burglary. They're trying to just... More than a heist.

Back in! Oh, shit! Oh, wow! I forgot you were here. I got a seven. Really? Yeah. Let's hear it.

Home Alone 2, Lost in New York. Oh! Damn! Oh, boy, oh, boy. He's back. We got to see some sun This is getting crazy My six should have been

Eight heads in a duffel bag Now that I think about it Because that was heisty, wasn't it? Or was it just murder? I don't know You could pass that off as your eight Alright Where in the audience is Zebras and Bulls? All right.

Where in the audience is Zebras and Bulls? That's you right up front. Oh, look at that. Good job. Dude, what's your name? John. John. And John, your microphone's working better than Doogieies.

Hit John's face on the table. See if it changes. John, what do you got for us? What name would you like us to play today? Make it a tough one. Or the one that you had ahead of time. Sean Penn. I like it. Doogie gets ahead of time. Sean Penn. All right. I like it.

Doogie gets to go first, then Michelle, then Mark, then Jim, then me. Let's do this. Let's bang this out. We've only got a couple of minutes. The thin red line. Mm-hmm. Harvey Milk. Oh.

What? Oh. Michelle, we really like to stress correct exact titles. So just, you know, speed isn't too important. Milk. Yeah. And of course, finally, the sequel just came out,

Lemonade. Ha ha. I recommend seeing milk twice So it's milk, milk, lemonade Boy oh boy, I just got that I was about to call you juvenile But I'm holding a puppet A puppet is blowing you my man

That's anal baby That's Hershey Park Alright That joke's never been made in history Alright That's anal, baby. Oh, shit. That's Hershey Park. All right. That joke's never been made in history. All right. Carlito's Way. Yeah, it's very good. Oh, all right.

Jesus Christ. Jim. Yes, Mystic River. Thank you. Jim. Yes. Mystic River. Thank you. Yeah. I'll go with... Taps. Nice.

This is crazy. I can't think of any... I mean, was he in Platoon? No. Ouch. What? I can't believe it, but I'm not going to lie. Wow, your prophecy came true. You did not? No. Ouch. What? I can't believe it. Wow, your prophecy came true.

You did not win today. Yeah. A seven-title heist, you can't get a pen? I don't think so. All right. Well, you're out. All right. Here we go.

Michelle. Moving on. There's one that I cannot think of that I know it. I'm also going to pull a Doogie, and I'm going to say, was he in Outsiders? Nope. Fuck. Although Lemonade would have been a great name for him in Outsiders. I'm out.

All right. I'll say Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Yeah. That was super deep. Jim. Yes, I will go with I Am Sam. Oh! New guy!

Full retard! Retard! That's the most acceptable place to use the word retard is when quoting Tropic Thunder. Yes, exactly. So that's okay. Yeah, that's true. I'm going to go with... There's so many.

Secret Life of Walter Mitty. Oh, he's in that? Oh, fuck. That's Walter Mitty goes looking for him. Which is big box office. People really care when Sean Penn goes missing. Sorry, go ahead. I'm going to go with Bad Boys.

Yeah. The original. Not the Will Smith and Martin Lawrence joints. The one that's set in a prison. Very disturbing. Yes. Violent. Jim.

Jim. It's his first time. First time. Oh, shit! We gotta do the lifelines, that's right. Well, I was, you know, for the sake of time, I wasn't gonna do them. Oh, smart, smart.

Yeah. Yeah. Mark, smart. Yeah. Good idea. Mark likes it. Was he in something with Julia Roberts? I feel like... That is correct. I feel like he was, but I guess I'll tap out.

Taps? You're tapping? Taps! No. All right. Tap out is correct. UFC movie. So it's me?

Yeah. Shanghai Surprise. Damn. All right. I will say the game. Mmm, yes. What a puzzle. Jim?

Oh, I'm out. Okay, Michelle. Wait, what? I get to go again? No, you're out. So it's just me and Mark. Yeah. I can't beat you. You're high. Should we take a break, go out in the alley for a few minutes and finish this thing?

No, no, no, no, no. Really let you think about it. You can't think of another one? Ah, shit. Come on. There was that one where he's all like, hey, what's up? You might have to Google this. Well, I just thought of a good one.

But somebody get ready with a Google, because I think he's in a movie called Without a Trace. I don't think so. With Gary Oldman and Ed Harris? Sounds even less familiar. Check it out. Please, Google. Without a Trace was a TV show with Anthony LePaglio

where he's looking for missing people. Based in Philadelphia. Is that right? Yeah. Right? Google it, please. Well, that puts a nice bow on it. I'll say Falcon and the Snowman.

Hold on. And wait, you're done. That could be true. I don't believe in Without a Trace. Oh, also, you win anyway. Oh, hey. You're the winner. All right.

Oh, jeez. All right. Yeah, I'm just trying to wrap it up. And the audience wants to yell at us for a minute of movies they thought of. The Gunman. Dead Man Walking. We're No Angels. Casualties of War.

Colors. Colors. Yeah. Colors. No Angels, Casualties of War. Colors. Colors. Colors. Yeah. Colors. That's...

Sweet Lowdown. Sweet Lowdown. 21 grams, sweet and low down. Angry Birds, really? Casualties of War. It's a gas. What else? Jackass number two.

Into the Wild. What was the one with Nicolas Cage and Elizabeth McGovern? Something about a moon? Did anyone look up without a trace? Oh, he's not in it? All right. Gangster Squad. I'm looking up that movie with Ed Harris.

No one in the audience has yelled without a trace. Because they know it's not. What is it? State of Grace. That's the one has yelled without a trace. No, I... Because they know it's not... What is it? State of Grace. State of Grace. That's the one. That's the one. Oh, my God. That's the one.

Yes. The only time you heard the title spoken, somebody had something in their mouth. They were... Yeah, exactly. Gargling or something. Right, right. State of Grace. State of Grace.

Without a trace. Thank you. In your face. But he still got first place. Yep. All right. So, Mark, you were playing for the puppet guy. Yeah, Patty.

Yeah. So come on up here and get your prizes, dude. Patty the Pirate. There's the poster, and yeah, there you go. Yeah, thank you. All right. I'm going to hold this pillow. Pass the other name tags down, because they should have shitheads on the back.

And Jim, promote yourself. Jim Ginty, what shows you got coming up, buddy? Well, I'm going to be on this podcast whenever it airs. So, yeah, check him out on Doug Loves Movies from Philadelphia. It's my first credit ever. I think I might be here for a show next week. Then I'm going to be in D.C. the week after that. I'm sure the venue's reputable.

I can't think of it off the top of my head. Is there a website or something? Yeah, it's jimginty.com. Okay. And then I got my Twitter. It's jim underscore ginty. And I'm on all the other shit. Funny comedian.

Yeah, very funny dude. Thanks for being here, Jim. Thank you. Thank you. Mark? Yo. Mark Norman, what's going on, dude? Any more Madison Square Garden?

No, no, I'll be at a bar show tomorrow. No, I got a... I'm jumping on the road. I'm at Cap City, Austin, Texas. I'm in New Orleans. I'm in Syracuse. Come on out to that, folks listening. Not here.

And, yeah, Bloomington, Indiana, you know. Not to brag. And check out my website, marknormandcomedy.com. And on Twitter, I'm at Mark Norm. And, yeah, without a trace. Will and Grace. Yeah. Yeah.

Thank you. Michelle Balloon, what's going on with you? I have a monthly show here in Philly in Northern Liberties. It's called Northern Comedies. It's at Bardot Cafe on 5th and Poplar. Our next one's July 6th. Yeah. It's a really fun show.

Some of you might have been there. It's at 9 p.m. The first Wednesday of every month. You can go to northerncomedies.com for all the info. And I will also be in New York doing Two Dope Queens at the Bell House. And that is July 11th, and that's a great show, Phoebe Robinson and Jessica Williams, so you should go to that show.

Thank you for being here, Michelle. Doogie, what's up? Doogie Horner, everybody. Horner! I have an album, a comedy album called The Delicate Man. You can get it on iTunes. I have a book called Some Very Interesting Cats Perhaps You Weren't Aware Of. You can get it at your local bookstore.

It's a great book. Funny title, always a good sign. I also have a middle grade book I illustrated called Kid Artists. And you can check me out on Twitter and Instagram at Doogie Horner. And check out his kid. And check out my kid. Hey, Horner. And check out his kid. And check out my kid. Hey, don't check out my kid. Cute kid.

Stay away from my child, Mark Norman. I love him. With your puppet. I love that little guy. Tampa, Florida, bring your name tag Saturday afternoon to the Ybor City Improv and lots of dates at DougLowsMovies.com Thank you again to Helium and to Philadelphia and all you guys

for coming out on a beautiful Sunday afternoon and one more time for Jim Ginty, Mark Norman, Michelle Balloon and Doogie Horner and as always, Brad Trackman is a shithead. Some very local humor.

Inside, inside. Some of the people in this building. Eggs are a shithead. Eggs, eggs. Eggs, eggs. Eggs, eggs. And right here on the back of a donut so you know it's true, Donald Trump is a shithead. Wow! His viewing prowess makes him cocky There's no room in his heart for you

Cause Doug loves movies!