Doug Loves Movies - Morgan Murphy, Matt Braunger, and T.J. Miller Guest

Episode Date: July 9, 2009

Doug welcomes three of his favorite up-and-coming comedians to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers screaming baby sticky seeds With 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Oh my goodness! I love movies! Hey everybody! This is interesting. We've got a, as you can see, we've got three guests coming out here today

and they're all very funny and I think you will enjoy them but I've got a little business to take care of here at the top of the podcast. We're coming to you from the ucb theater before comedy death ray which you're all staying to see comedy death ray right that's what the live audience is here for for that's what i and i shanghai them for my podcast and they have to sit through it to get good seats to comedy death ray which is at ucbB every Tuesday and is always fantastic. Am I right, everybody? Yeah, I am. And it says here I've got an album coming out on

August 4th on Comedy Central Records. It's called Unbalanced Load. And I have no reason for calling it that other than that sounds funny to me. I always thought there should be a band called Unbalanced Load and nobody took me up on it

so I said I'll name my goddamn CD that and watch all you bands with dumb names cry for the rest of your lives. Also, of course, a big part of Comedy Death Ray and all of the stuff I do is specialthing.com. They have

astrecords.com is where you can get my first record and records by Paul Tompkins and lots of awesome people. And the last podcast was pulled for a few days because I was crazily inappropriate in talking about the subject came up of me being, I probably brought it up, me being in the movie, the movie Captain EO at Disneyland. And then I talked very openly about what I feel about Michael Jackson

and his enjoyment of children. And it was... You know, if you listen to it just after Harry died, it was probably really awful. So we took it off for a few days so that nobody would listen to it and think, you're saying this now? Why are you going on this tirade now and not also saying, and he's dead?

Like, we never mentioned that he was dead because he wasn't yet when I said it. So we took it off for a few days and then we put it back on. And then so then people were writing me how come there's the same podcast but now it's five seconds longer? Well that's because Matt Belknap from AST Records and a special thing dot com

added in the date right before. So if you listen to it now I haven't heard it but it's his voice saying whatever date we taped it on right before we go into the story about Michael Jackson. I don't know if that'll do the job. I think there'll still be some idiots who write to me going, why are you speaking this way of the dead? And it's like, well, I always speak horribly about everyone.

So give me a break. Also, I was just trying to figure out backstage. I was in a rush to get here. I, I was just trying to figure out backstage. I was in a rush to get here. I was editing a project I can't talk about. But, um, yet. But, uh, what's opening on Friday? Do any of you guys know if any big movies are coming out on Friday?

I Love You, Beth Cooper, which I will sustain from slamming. Bruno opens the same day? Oh, okay. So I got to think of an eight words or less review of Bruno right here on the spot. Check this out. It's like

Borat, but a different dude. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven words! I have one to spare, so I'll throw in fart. Okay, that's my review of Bruno. It's official.

But if you guys want to write eight words or less reviews on Twitter and send them to me, I read my favorite ones on Scott Aukerman's podcast. Oh, my God, this is so complicated. His podcast, his comedy death ray podcast that you can, the new ones are recorded every Friday. All right, so I've also decided last episode to start having a theme every month about my guests or involving my guests in some sort of theme.

And tonight is no exception. It kind of is. It's a very weak theme. But coming up in future episodes, you guys will be like, wow, now that's a theme show. This one you'll be like, okay, we'll go along with you on that.

These are three comics that you should know. You might not, but if you don't know them, you should. And now you're going to, because they're on this show. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my friends, comedians, Morgan Murphy, Matt Bronger, and TJ Miller. Let's hear it for Morgan and Matt and TJ. Come on out. Pick any chair you want.

Oh, I like it when the lady is right to my left. Nice. Welcome. So, yeah, is right to my left. Nice. Welcome. So, yeah, just talking to those microphone thingies. You guys know how to do that. Let's get a little voice recognition for the listeners. T.J. Miller, first of all. Hi, everybody.

Always in a hat. Always wearing a hat. Every occasion. Ironically dressed like a gangster at all times. Or a black toddler. Or a black toddler. Or a black toddler. Holy shit. As opposed to that, Bronner dresses like a Caucasian toddler.

That'd be a great horror movie, Black Toddler. Right? Because now they've got Orphan coming out soon. How much further do they got to go? Infant. You open the toy chest, he's like, I'm going to kill you. Precocious snaps.

Yeah, very precocious snaps. Very confident baby. Now, that voice was Matt Bronger with the confident baby remark. Yeah. And then, of course, Morgan Murphy is the lowest voiced person on the panel. Reflects well. Say something. I'm trying.

What do you want me to say? I'm not That was perfect Okay I love it And Have any of you listened to the podcast ever? No

No This is gonna be awesome Morgan's heard a little bit of it Because I have these games that I play That like I'm not gonna spend a lot of time Explaining them to you Because the listeners already know

How they're played So you guys are just gonna to have to dive in. And it's going to get ugly. No, it's going to be fine. We're going to have fun. Have any of you seen any movies lately? Yeah. Not on a plane or otherwise because I know we all fly a lot.

Yeah. No, I always sleep during the plane movie. No matter what it is? Usually, yeah. They never show anything I wanted. They show like confessions of a shopaholic like last plane ride I was on. I've seen it a couple of times. In the movie theater. You did? No, you didn't. Yeah, I did.

These are confessions that you shouldn't be making. About confessions of an alcoholic. I got a confession about being a shitty movie aholic. I saw it in New York with Henriette Mantel and I went to go see it.

Ooh, she played Alice in the Brady Bunch movies. I'm just showing off. I'm not trying to belittle her. She did a great job with it, I thought. Yeah, sure. And she made a,

didn't she make like a documentary that was kind of cool with John Fuglesang maybe? She made a documentary about Ralph Nader. She made the documentary about Ralph Nader. She used to work for him when she was a young 20-something. Pretty exciting. And she was in the Sex and the City movie for a brief second. Yeah.

Can we get a little bit more heat on Morgan's mic possibly? Or maybe I should trade with her or something because it sounds like she's a lot softer than everybody else. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. A little bit.

A little bit. Nobody's going to know what he heard that whole story, that great story I just told. You should tell it again. Whisper it to them. We don't need mics. That's your turn to speak for the entire podcast. We don't need mics. That's the fact of this room. Well, you do for a podcast.

Otherwise, they won't record it. Yeah, you're right. So when we do one, we should use mics. We should do one, for sure. This would be a horrible show to put on without the podcast element. Four people sitting in a row just talking over each other into microphones i always buy the movie on the plane and then halfway through i'll fall asleep and i'll miss

it like i tried to watch what's that liam nielsen movie taken is that a person liam nielsen is that that's wrong you just combined two guys liam nielsen ratings yeah doesn't he have neil liam what is it, Neeson? What's the last one? Neeson, yeah. Police Academy 5. Take it. Surely they're

going to take you. They're going to take me and don't call me Shirley. Naked gun 33 in a Schindler's List. Yeah. No? All right.

So, yeah, I keep trying. So I'd always get to the point where he's like, you listen to me. I will give you one chance to give my daughter back. Otherwise, I have a very special set of skills. A very, very special, special set of skills.

Directly related to killing all of you. And I'm like, this is going to be amazing! Done. Scotch and soda out. Gone. So then I kept trying to, I kept buying it over and over. You missed something

incredibly bad. Like, I mean, in a good way? No, in a good way? No, because he kills like everyone he finds. I love that. Like Mater D's

that are just trying to help him get down the hallway. Like, where's the guy that took my daughter? I think I, oh God, why? Like, you just stab the guy.

Like, no time. No time to spare your life. Neck broken. Dead. I can't be sure whether or not you're good or bad. Must kill everyone. There's no time to judge.

Punch in the throat. Special skill. Special set of skills. Special skill. Special skill. Do a lot of physical comedy. That point goes to Matt Bronger. Damn it!

I was so... I did physical comedy. I did the physical comedy. I did the physical part of it. Whose line is it anyway? I'm getting five points to that guy for making the pistachio reference. Two points to Greg Proops because he's wearing glasses.

And sounds like he's smart. That was the first show to really use a pool noodle. You know those swimming pool noodles? They really rock the shit out of that. Well, no one knew the comedy that was there with the pool noodle. You know those swimming pool noodles? They really rocked the shit out of that. Well, no one knew the comedy that was there with the pool noodle, you know? But then they showed us.

It's very electric, folks. First show to use a pool noodle. What's a pool noodle? Second show with white bags. That's the long inflatable foam thing. Oh, yeah.

Fuck, okay. 24 years. Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Okay, shit. I'm sorry. If you have stuff you want to say

to each other That might not be interesting To everyone else You can do this Okay Oh okay No it was really interesting He asked me what a pool noodle was

And I explained And he told me That I reacted violently For no reason Like oh fuck okay Pool noodle I'll show you a pool noodle And I'll show you

a new poodle. That was terrible. Hashtag. I'm going to take a point away from myself for that one. Minus one for me. Somebody needs to make a pistachio reference quickly.

All right, so here's what I want to ask you guys now. This guy, Owen Globerman, in the Entertainment Weekly, very cleverly ranked the top ten Woody Allen movies, in his opinion, the best ones, and the bottom ten Woody Allen movies, in his opinion, and then he gave Whatever Works a 28, which is out of 40, it's number 28. I thought it was a little better than that, personally. I did see it. You didn't that, personally. I did see it.

You didn't like it? I did not see it. I went to, though, because I like Larry David and I like Woody Allen. But I don't like not getting drunk. So I haven't been able to see it. Oh, that's what keeps you from going to the movies? Sometimes, yeah. That was stunning.

Because you can justify sleeping on a plane during a movie, but sleeping in a theater during a movie. That looks real bad. That's all my mom does. She's constantly shit-tasting. I think that's where she goes to sleep. How was the movie? I don't know. I fell asleep.

I'm off to bed. At Pelham 123. 8 o'clock, Pelham 123. Did you see that? Did you see that movie? I did not. That was an amazing movie. Did you guys see that or no?

You saw that? Yeah, fuck yeah, I did. It was good? Tony Scott, man. Yeah, I don't even do cocaine because he makes movies. You do cocaine. No, the shit is crazy, man.

You're watching... There's a part of that movie where they... I'm very excited about this. There's a part of that movie where they're bringing the money to Denzel Washington so that he can then take it to Travolta.

So this is a side thing. They're getting the money to him. It's the craziest car chase in the fucking world. But they got that same thing in the first one. Have you seen the first one? Yeah. It's amazing. Yeah, it's amazing.

Tony Scott does it even better. Come on. And then there's things moving, and he tells you where you are on the map, and then, I like it. The one thing I heard about that movie. It's like Domino, but it doesn't turn into shit. I heard New Yorkers... Yeah, there's a guy who I can hang out with after this.

Boy, did we get burned by Domino, man. How bad! Tony Scott, Domino, let's do this! Domino... Everyone in Domino looks like... Watching people play Domino's would be more interesting. Everyone in that movie, Domino, looks like a greasy android. All of them.

They look like a few waxed-up androids. Let's try it. TJ, I'm sorry to bust your riff, but scoot down to your left just a little. Let's all move a little further apart from each other. Yeah, the loud guys shouldn't be together. Well, no, the microphones are just... Yeah, that's what I mean. Hear that?

It's weird. Some weeks it does that, some weeks it doesn't. Getting a Hummer. Wait, no. Okay, so let's go down Just really quickly Favorite Woody Allen movie Annie Hall Annie Hall's number one

His is Manhattan Which I cannot disagree with I'd say that I'd say it's two Annie Hall's like The best They're practically Like the same movie

But one's without colors And one's hilarious And the other one's funny One's a little bit more linear Yeah And Matt Your favorite Annie Hall Yeah I a little bit more linear Yeah And Matt, your favorite? Annie Hall Yeah

I'm gonna Annie Hall it Yeah! Three cherries Sorry What? You never gamble? Slots Got it

This guy names Match Point As Woody Allen's Sixth best movie Come on Drama shouldn't even be In the top ten I don't understand How could you ever

Because you gotta do Bananas and Love and Death And it doesn't matter what the order of that is Bananas is three, which is a pretty nice placement I like that Where's Everything You Want to Know About Sex? Really? What about Take the Money and Run? Everything You Want to Know About Sex is five

Take the Money and Run is not in the top ten Ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous What about Tiger Lily? Tiger Lily is number seven I knew it would be too high. I knew it. Silly, funny. What about Curse of the Jade Scorpion?

It's too high. That's number 33. That's the bottom side. Oh, that should be the bottom bottom. So which one do you think is the worst, TJ? Worst Woody Allen movie? I can give you some names if you need them. Curse of the Jade Scorpion.

Yeah. That was pretty awful. I don't know. I kind of like, I love him so much that I try and find even small time crooks. Remember with Lovitz?

I'm like, is this a good water bit? Right? They broke a water main? That's funny. You're doing it, Woody. Just keep with it, you know?

Like I'm urging the movie on. I'm like, you can make it, little buddy. You'll have funniness one day. And so that one was pretty bad. I was pretty disappointed. Yeah, Hollywood ending.

Like, yeah, there's a thing called blindness that just happens when you're nervous. Nervous blindness, where you just go blind for long periods of time and then get your sight back. That makes sense. Yeah. What about...

That's one of my least favorites. I also didn't like anything else where he had, like, children playing the parts. He had What about, that's one of my least favorites. I also didn't like anything else where he had like children playing the parts. He had like, Jason Figgs and Christina Ricci saying exactly the same kind of things

that Annie Hall and Woody Allen said. So it's like, one of them was just kids. That's like, whatever works looks like him reading Woody Allen dialogue to me.

When I watch the trailer, I go, oh, it's Larry David reading Woody Allen dialogue. Larry David more so than say kenneth brana or celebrity oh that's the worst where he's just doing a woody allen impression at least kenneth brana david already has that look at you with your shirt and why am i like why why are you why didn't woody go stop that's me look at you with the shirt. I just want to do

the accent. I have no imagination. And the shoes. So do you have a least favorite? Just for personal, well, for personal reasons, sounds weird, but Which movie did you get raped during? The one I got raped during? Annie Hall.

And that's why it's your favorite. That's why it's my favorite. The one where they, Everyone Says I Love You, where they sing the whole time, just drove me crazy when I saw it. And it's not a bad movie, but I just,

Edward Norton, It's pretty bad. Like, he just looked like he should be singing the words I'm Uncomfortable the whole movie. Yeah, and Julia Roberts and all of them.

That was good. It was one of those things like, let's do a musical. And no one was like, why? You know? Which is, that's do a musical. And no one was like, why? That's the first question you ask. Very tepid laughter. Very generous.

Very nice. Morgan. What? It's the Woody Allen movie with all the black people in it. What? Do the right thing? She the black people in it. What? Do the right thing? She's got to have it?

Bamboozle? Has he ever made a movie of black people? No. I think he... Whoa, there's somebody in the crowd. You really stirred him up. Don't say anything about Michael Jackson. It is Curse of the Jade Scorpion. Although I will say when I saw it,

I saw it at the Vista, and Nick Swartzen was there, and I think he started dancing in the back of the theater. People. Although I will say when I saw it, I saw it at the Vista and Nick Swartzen was there and I think he started dancing in the back of the theater. People in the theater liked that more than they liked the movie. It was like the biggest interruption but people couldn't have been happier. I saw a few minutes of it on cable the other

day and there's a lot of his movies I hate more but it's definitely not good. But let's use that. Let's use, since Curse of the Jade Scorpion came up so much, and I already chose it for this next game, this is called Build a Title. And basically how this works is we take turns adding

titles of other movies. They have to be listed in my good old Leonard Malton book, or if we've all heard of him, then that'll count too. Motion Pictures. By the way, have you read any other books besides that book? Leonard Malton's movie guide is my Bible. 2007?

Yeah, I don't even have the most current one. Keep it 07. I recently upgraded from 06 to 07 somehow. I don't know how I did it. I think somebody in the family died and I got this one. It was in an inheritance. And my Leonard Maltton's 2007 movie guide goes to my nephew, Douglas.

Yeah, Douglas. Okay, so that's what happened. So now I have it. But if it's a more recent movie, we'll all know whether it's real or not. So the idea is you add a title to the title until we get stoppers on both ends

and we can't think of anything else and the last person to have added a title wins nothing. It's just for fun. So the title is Curse of the Jade Scorpion. So we'll start with you, Morgan. You have to add a movie at the beginning that ends in the word curse or name a movie that begins with the word scorpion and those don't count

so like you could you could do scorpion king if you wanted to but now that I just so now that I said I could have thought of he's like an example that you can't use and the only thing you'll be able to think of is scorpion king to get you now rack your brain to figure out what ends with curse. Here's seven examples. I can't use that one. Why can't I use it? I didn't say you couldn't use it. Oh, yeah, that's why I want to use it.

I would suggest not using it after all that. I'm going to use it. You got it. Yeah, I want to use it. Curse of the Jade Scorpion. This whole thing gave me, I've had three panic attacks since you said we were playing a game. Since you started explaining it. This is awful. Oh, I forgot had three panic attacks since you said we were playing a game. Since you started explaining it. This is awful.

Oh, I forgot to say, shall we play a game? All right. So, Matt, add to that. Scorpion King. Curse of the Jade Scorpion King Ralph. Oh, that's good. I think that might be a stopper. Also saw it in the movie theaters.

Did you? Yep. Well played. Remember that spotted dick joke? I was young enough to you? Yep. Well played. Remember that Spotted Dick joke? I was young enough to where I laughed my ass off. Remember the food?

They was... Nobody here saw King Ralph? It's a dish in England and they kept saying it's called Spotted Dick and that was the joke and I fucking got it.

I got it. Okay, so it's on you now, TJ, to come up with a movie that ends in curse or begins in Ralph. While you guys were talking, I was thinking as hard as I could. I don't know if anyone saw me going like this. I'm even going to look and see if any movies

begin with Ralph. I don't think they do. Yeah, Ralph was a real dick move, Brogger, by the way. You know what Ralph ends in curse? Yeah, you could have done... I was saving my ass. A movie that ends... There's got to be some terrible movie,

like a horror film that ends with curse, right? Blair Witch Curse. That's what I want to do. Blair Witch Curse. You remember that film, right? Later they made a rip-off of it called Cloverfield Curse. That was self-deprecating you motherfuckers according to Leonard Maltin 2007 there's no movie that begins in Ralph big

surprise wait a second though okay so you don't have a lot of anything hell the Soderbergh thing can you do something that sounds like it like well yeah help you out but instead you're out of the game. Why? Is there anything that ends with curse? Is there anything that ends with curse? I'm sure there is, but how can you look it up in a book that's alphabetical? Yeah. I'm going to find something that ends in curse.

Look up Amityville Horror Curse. That's okay. There's no prizes. There's no shame in losing. You're out. Look up Demonic Toy Curse. All right. Here we go. It's on me now. You should go get a drink're out. Look up demonic toy curse. All right, here we go. It's on me now. Look up Schindler's Curse. Go get a drink next door. Come back.

Curse of the Jade. I go to birds. I might fall asleep and then not answer texts. Curse of the Jade Scorpion King Ralph the Dog. Wait, you can do that? Yes, you can. That's why you should listen to the podcast before you come in to play these games. Wait, I could have said Ralph the Dog?

No, you could have said R-Alpha Dog. That's not fair. It's awesome is what it is. It is amazing. Alright, now, Morgan, now we need a movie that starts with the word dog, since we've all given up on curse.

Curse of the Jays, Scorpion, King, Ralph, Dog, and Z-Boys? What's that? What's that? Dogtown and Z-Boys.

That's what it's called, right? Dogtown and Z-Boys? Unbelievable. See? Okay, so now we're over to Matt and you have to come up with something that starts with boys. Z-Boys. You can drop the Z. Do I have to say the entire title?

I don't think Liza Minnelli's made her life story yet. Z-Boys. So boys. Do I have to say the whole thing, or just boys? Yeah, you can just add the new title. In the Hood. Boys in the Hood. And it's with a Z, isn't it, on the thing? The poster? What do you call it? Yeah, the Z's on the new title. In the Hood. Boys in the Hood. And it's with a Z, isn't it?

On the thing? The poster? What do you call it? Yeah, the Z's on the other end, but that's cool. Okay. Boys in the Hood. All right. Do you have anything that starts with Hood, TJ?

We'll bring you back in for this. Wait, I thought he was out. No, if he can do it. If he can do it and do it quickly, he's back in. Hoodlum. That's a real movie. That is. That might be a stopper.

And I'm coming for you. With your C-Town and the dog shit. I'm trying to think of a word that begins title that begins in lum. Hoodlum. Lumberyard. Remember thatumb. Lumberyard. Remember that movie? Lumberyard.

I love that. That crazy gang of misfits that worked in a lumberyard. And they're like, talking about lumberyard. It was a musical. I remember that. It was like Meatballs, but in a lumberyard. Yeah, I think I might be out on this one. Hood Lumb.

Might throw me out. But can you still go back to the... We can still try Curse, but I can't think of a movie that ends with Curse. There's got to be a movie that ends with Curse. That's it. Curse of Witch Mountain, really? Is that what you just said?

Because I thought about that, too. Curse of Witch Mountain, yeah. The Witch Mountain is silent in that title. So we're all stumped. We're officially stumped. I got one from the audience, but we should quit because it's not fair to just keep going. I'm willing to bet there's a movie called The Curse. I'm going to just say I don't know what it is, but I bet it happened.

The Curse. That sounds good. It sounds like it might have happened. I'll even look it up in a second, but the game's over, Morgan, so relax. Did I win? Curse of the Jade Scorpion King, Ralph at Dogtown, and Z-Boys in the Hoodlum.

That's our title. That's a lot of fun. So sometimes I play that on Twitter. You probably have seen me do that on Twitter. I play it on there, but I only let people add to the end, because if they add to both ends, it just becomes mayhem. And now people will write to me saying, how come you can add to both ends on the podcast,

but you can't add... Oh, shut up. Okay, and then... Let me just ask you guys really quickly. This is off the topic of movies. Is it possible to make a joke on Twitter without someone taking it literally and writing back to you a literal answer

to whatever joke you just made? I mean, you have tens of thousands of followers. If you only have 680 followers like me, yes. Yeah, it's possible.

You have cool 680 followers, though. 688 now. Because there's got to be, try it when we're done here tonight. Write a joke that ends in a question mark

and you will get the answer. I do a lot of funny, like, it doesn't even have to have a question mark, actually. I do a lot of, like, fake, sad Twitters, you know, like. Are those fake? Those aren question mark, actually. I do a lot of fake sad Twitters.

Are those fake? Those aren't fake, man. Those are not fake. TJ's gutter Twittering again. But looking up at the stars. He's pool of vomit tweeting. So anyway, so I did a game on there today. I did a game on there today, and the winner...

Sometimes you lose, audience. Sometimes you just lose. At at the end of every podcast I say Willem Dafoe is a shithead and I'll explain it to you later if you really want to know why but lately I've been doing this fun thing where contest winners get to name who the shithead is so the winner this time was at Zack Z a CK Sonnenberg if you want to follow him he's, he won this contest. Remember that. That's a good reason to follow him. Well, people are listening.

They could rewind. But anyway, whoever is the shithead at the end of the show, that's courtesy of, it was his decision. It's not my decision who the shithead is at the end of the show. And let's see if we have enough time

to play one more game. Yeah, we do. We can do this. We can do this. It's time for the Leonard Maltin game. There's a whole game based on this book. No way. Are we going to look up if the curse was a real?

Oh, yeah. Thanks for reminding me. Well, now we don't have time to play the game. I really want to know about this curse film. Yeah, that's a good idea to find out if there's a curse movie. Have you guys seen Moon? That shit is dope. Let me see that.

That shit is so amazing. I tried to get the music from the score as soon as I walked out of the theater so that I could keep listening to it and thinking about it for the rest of the day. I was not able to do that. I heard negotiations almost broke down. That movie didn't get made

because Sam Rockwell was in, but Sam Rockwell held out for more money. I knew where it was going. I liked it. God damn it with the word curse, you guys. First of all, yes, The Curse is the first one listed. It's a bomb from 1987 starring Will Wheaton.

Yeah. He has a shit ton of followers on Twitter, so I'm not going to talk crap about him. Let's see here. There must be 50 movies to start in the word curse they're all old though cursed which starred Christina Ricci was directed by Wes Craven and then there's curse of Frankenstein the gentleman over here said curse of the mummy earlier curse of the cat people curse of the demon curse of the crimson altar, which means a woman having her period in a church. Yeah.

Who doesn't know that, though? Curse of the fly. Which is a curse. Curse of the old jade scorpion, of course. Oh, wait. It doesn't matter how many begin with curse. That wasn't the point. I was just looking up that one curse. There's something called Ron's curse.

Do you think there is? No, but I kind of just wish. No wishing. We've got to play. All right. Letter of All Game. Here's how it works. I read names from the cast of a motion picture. I give you several clues first.

You guys bid on how many names you think you can get it in. We list the names from the bottom of the cast up. So if you know a lot about supporting actors and cameos and shit like that, it helps. You know a lot about supporting actors and cameos and shit like that. It helps. And every time I try to have a running theme so that all the movies fit under one heading, these are all movies that begin with the letter R. Your podcast is like an incredibly complicated game show where no one wins anything. No, no one wins, including the listeners.

It's just torture. No, but it's good. Games are good because then we have to talk one at a time. All right. Wise. Wise, Doug. Because we wouldn't be able to handle that. I'm smart.

Okay, so we'll start with Morgan again. Risky business. You know, if you want to play that way... No. We're moving on to Matt. Ron's curse. That's a great coincidence. All the fake titles you could have come up with.

He came up with an R1. I choose Ralph-a-Dog. You guys are on fire. All the fake titles you could have come up with You came up with an R one Ralph the Dog You guys are on fire Ralph the Dog What a bunch of assholes Ralph the Dog Did I say The theme of the show was comics you should know

I meant assholes That's the theme We came in the wrong night These are my friends So this was from 1997, Matt. We're starting with Matt because you blew out your guess. Okay, we're starting

with Matt. This is from 1997, right? It's R-rated. And a lot of it takes place in a museum. That's the clue that I came up with. Oh, I didn't have it.

Well, hang on. This is a great way to play. There's 13 names, and you start the bidding at 13, or you could say I can name it in zero names, and then if you say that, TJ can challenge you, and if you get it wrong, TJ gets the point. But TJ has to understand the rules of the game, which TJ doesn't understand. You'll get it, because I'll walk you get it wrong, TJ gets the point. But TJ has to understand the rules of the game, which TJ doesn't understand.

You'll get it because I'll walk you through it. I'll hold your hand from as far away as possible. So do you want to try and get it in zero? Yeah, I think I know what the movie is. Okay, so say I can name it in zero names. I can name it in zero names. TJ, tell him name that movie.

Really? Unless you think you can name it in less names. I can. Zero names TJ tell him Name that movie Really? Oh Unless you think You could name it In less names I can That's impossible Just did it

Alright ready Yeah Name that movie Matt Brawner Relic That's correct The Relic Yes

Lucky Just fucking lucky No that was nice I'm not a movie fan Museum was a solid clue I think It was a solid clue Cause you know

That Night in the Museum Was made a couple years ago and there weren't a lot of not in 1997 or when okay start with our that was great so now we start again with morgan because uh tj challenged and i didn't challenge didn't work out for you you told me to challenge him why do you do that in my own volition you're like tj challenge him say that movie. I invented this game just to fuck with you. I've been doing it on the podcast for about a year. Now! And I finally got you on. It's an elaborate trap.

Like, I keep thinking it'd be funny if one of my shows was just cops trapping a bunch of stoners in one building. Like, I did all this work to make people think I was a stoner, and then... Okay. You're actually a narc? 1991. Oh, God.

It's got 11 names. It's an R-rated movie. Uh-huh. And this is what Leonard Maltin said about it. Rough, tough, and rousing at times. That's your clue. And it's 11 names. So what you do is you say,

I can name the movie in 11 names or whatever number you want. And then Matt can challenge you. How many names do you think you can do it in, Morgan? Oh, man. I think I can do it in six names. Wow. Nice, arbitrary number.

I like your gumption. Yeah. Now, so Matt, you can bid lower or tell her to name that movie. Nah, name it. Alright, here we go, Morgan. I need to watch and learn. Name that shit.

1938 begins with the letter R. Wait, 1938? Did I say that? Yeah, it was in 1991 before. They're a slightly different period of film. It's 138 minutes long is why I said that. It's either Marx Brothers and Duck Soup or Batman 2 with

Mr. Freeze. I don't think... Did those movies start with the letter R? Okay. I forgot that part of the game. Alright, Morgan. Here we go. Preston Sturgis. Who else? Go ahead. Jack Wilde. Nick Brimble.

Michael Wincott. Just say Nick Brimble again one more time. Nick Brimble. I added a Brimble Michael Wincott Just say Nick Brimble again One more time Nick Brimble I added in Brimble Brian Blessed Michael McShane That's one, two, three, four, five

And Geraldine McEwen So see that's That's why you generally Want to start off with like I'll name it in eleven names By going first You really get that Like chance to

Name it in all the names of the cast. And then the other people have to have the balls to undercut you. Yeah, can I go back and say 11? Let's do that, yeah. Okay. No, no, no. I can't.

I can't. Matt still gets one gimme. The other two both got a gimme at some point. A movie with an R, 19? It's Rough, Tough, and Rousing. Oh, good. That's the name of the movie. Rough, Tough, and Rousing at Times. 1991 an R movie with an R 19 it's rough tough and rousing oh god that's the name

of the movie and rousing at times rousing at times this movie's a real relic the movie ski school came out 1991

the curse is cursed that's all I know alright so you you do not get this point and I will say the rest of the cast name and first person that knows it, yell it out.

Nobody knows it yet? Alan Rickman. Christian Slater. Robin Hood. Nerds in the house! Do you also see how cool and collected Robin Hood and Prince of Peace are? What was the description?

Rough, tough, and rousing at times. I didn't say the clues would be helpful. First I thought you said arousing. I was totally thrown. All right, so Matt gets that point. So now you're up two. You just need one more point, Matt, to win the whole thing. I get that point?

How do I get that point? She didn't get it. You challenged her and she missed it. You challenged me. It's like a game show. I got you. Like Password or whatever. Or no, name that tune

that you say. I can name it in that many notes. Whatever. Okay. So since you got the point, we start with TJ on this one. You're in the catbird seat, buddy. That's exciting. This is from 1994.

Begins with an R. Exciting. This is from 1994. Okay, that's good. It begins with an R. Jean Triplehorn has an unbilled cameo. I know most of her billed cameos. However, I don't know many of her unbilled cameos. Unbilled, dude, so good luck. And there's 16 names. Jesus Christ.

So you can start with 16. And it starts with the letter R. Yeah. From 1994. I'll take 15 names. I like that. I like that move. Morgan?

I'm going to... What do I say if I want him to do that? You really do? Yeah. He's going to get it if he has that many names. I know, but he needs it. Oh. The ultimate strategy.

Oh, God. It's been a real confidence booster for me. Let the limp one catch up and then be him. No, I'd say my maternal instincts are starting to show. I got fake nails this week. All right, here we go. Are those breath eyes? So say name that movie to TJ.

Does Lee's? Hey TJ. Hey. How you doing? How you doing? How you doing, TJ? You know, there's certain time constraints to my program. TJ, name that movie. Alright, here we go.

Name those names. You get 15 names. Yeah. I'm only going to need 14. If you don't get this, I'm going to murder you. Oh, no! There's a lot on the line with this one. Renee Zellweger, David Spade, Karen Duffy, Kevin Pollack, Keith David,

David Perner, Susan Norfleet, Harry O'Reilly, John Mahoney, Joe Don Baker, Swoozie Kurtz, Steve Zahn, Jernine Garofalo, Ben Stiller, Ethan Hawke. There's only one goddamn name left. Christ on a bun, man.

It's Rene Zellweger and David Spade. Really? They've made so many films together. You really don't know? Yeah, I'm blanking on it. I probably know. So what happens? I say it? We're going to have you back on the worst

Players Ever edition. And you're going to go head-to-head with a chair and a bottle of water. I could definitely beat a chair. You really don't know? I don't think I do. See what happens when you try to help somebody, Morgan? He reads the stars last.

But look at how much we learned about TJ. I mean, we didn't know he was that dumb. Yeah, Zellweger had a tiny role. I couldn't even tell you what she did in it. Spade plays the guy that when he gets a Why does he get so many hints? Because he's already lost. He already does not get the point.

I'm just trying to help him. Nobody told me you come on here and get your feelings hurt. No one told me that. They were like, it's all comedians. I love movies and I hate feelings. Might as well call it that. It's pretty clear in the theme song, I think.

All right, so you get that point, Morgan. Congratulations. The movie's Reality Bites. Oh, right. Why didn't you say Winona Ryder? Winona was the last of the 16 names. If you'd have said I can name in 16 and then Morgan

would try to give it to you. Instead I'd like to talk like a gay man who talks like a black woman with Morgan and choose 15. Yeah, if I had gotten Winona Ryder

I totally would have gotten it. That was the key, Winona Ryder. We were talking about nails before. We were talking about the Lee nails. Because I love, I love the oeuvre,

the catalog of Ethan Hawke, Ben Stiller films. There's Reality Bites and... Gattaca. I don't know about that. Ben Stiller, Unbuilt Cameo in Gattaca. He plays the elevator operator.

I didn't know that one. All right, so now... We've got to finish this up. We've got five minutes left to get this done. Oh, Jesus. All right, so let we've got to finish this up. We've got five minutes left to get this done. Oh, Jesus. All right, so let's go to another one. And so Morgan got the points. We'll start with Matt. Matt has two.

Morgan has one. TJ Doghouse. TJ Ralph-a-Doghouse. That's your new stage name. Ralph-a-Doghouse. TJ Ralph-a-Doghouse Miller. Who let these jokes out? Woof, woof, woof.

It will be my tag. I can't believe that just happened. Okay, here we go. Way to commit, though. This is the best. This is from 1987. This is my favorite thing I've ever done. It's pretty great.

This is from 1987. It's an R movie My clue is Oh, okay It's a sequel And one of the leads From the original Just has a cameo

In this sequel That begins with the letter R 1987 And there are Ten names, Matt How many can you do it in? I'll I'll go for nine. Nine names. TJ?

I can do it in eight. I like that. I like that you bounce back with the confidence that it takes to intimidate the others. Morgan? How many names or challenge him to do it TJ cannot do it

so that will challenge him wait hold on you're supposed to say seven right you guys need to work this out ahead of time you have 15 names for one of the most iconic movies of the 90s of your generation let's try something from the 80s

let's see if you can do it I'm excited to see what you say when you don'ts. Let's see if you can do it. I'm excited. I'm excited to see what you say when you don't get it right. I was going to say do it. Okay. Let's go. He's going to do it. Eight words. You got eight. You get eight names. I mean, not words.

Fewer names. Oh, God damn it. Jamie. Jamie James Cromwell. They actually put James in parentheses. What? James Cromwell They actually put James in parenthesis Like What? James Cromwell? I think he's just James Cromwell

Okay Then Anthony Edwards Ed Lauder Donald Gibb Andrew Cassis I think it's pronounced Courtney Thorne-Smith

Timothy Busfield Larry B. Scott Everyone in here knows it already No pressure Do you have any idea? If you don't have an idea It's not going to come to you Do you know who any of those people are?

I know Anthony Edwards There you go Only one of the leads from the original appears in this sequel in a small role. Rumerican Pie 2. You did it!

How did you do that? Did you make a time machine and go back and change the title of that movie? I did. Everybody knows it. The other names are Curtis Armstrong and Robert Carradine, and it's Revenge of the Nerds 2, Nerds in Paradise. Only one came back?

Yeah, he ended up being the main nerd, Robert Carradine. And Edwards just shows up in a cameo in the beginning. I think he has a cast on his legs. Oh yeah, he's like, have fun on vacation. Yeah, he's got casts on his legs or some shit. Fuck. That was fun. Oh yeah, he's like, have fun on vacation. Yeah, he's got casts on his legs or some shit. Fuck. All right.

All right. That was fun. Okay, so Morgan got that point. Yeah, I did. Nice strategy. Always giving it to TJ. Yeah. I like that.

I think that could pay off for you. We're starting with Matt on this next one. I've got to find another one that we haven't done already. We did that one. Boo, boo, boo. Okay, here we go. Hey, you've seen Crank 2? I like that movie. I just saw that. You like that one. Boo, boo, boo. Okay, here we go. Hey, you've seen Crank 2? I like that movie.

I just saw that. You like that? Yeah, I loved it. Really? Did you like the first one? Yeah, I liked the first one, but I loved the second one. Really?

You like the scene where he fucks the girl in front of the Asians to keep his heart? That was creepy as hell, but the rest of the movie was kind of fun. Wait, in the second one

where he's waving the cowboy hat? I haven't seen it. I've only seen the first one. Oh, fuck. Really? God. second one where he's waving the cowboy hat? I haven't seen it. I've only seen the first one. Oh, fuck. Really? God. That's how he gets his heart going? He's fucking the girl in a horse race track, and he's fucking her on the field, and he's

waving a cowboy hat. He didn't have a cowboy hat before, but then he starts fucking her. It cuts back to him, and he's waving a cowboy hat while he's fucking her. Wow. And everybody in the stands is going crazy. Of course. Oh, no. Pizazz. This is from 1996

This is from 1996 I thought it was going to take you a while to find the movie This is an R movie No I found it like 10 minutes into that story I mean That doesn't make sense This goes to Matt 1996

This is what Lynn Moulton said about it Okay, this goes to Matt. 1996. This is what Len Malton said about it. Big, loud, and often dumb. So this is not often rousing. This is often dumb. There's 14 names. And it's from 1996. What do you think you can do it in, Matt?

I'll do 13. 13 names. TJ? TJ, say 14. I challenge you. I'll say 14, please. You can't do that. I'd like to go back to the previous question and try and answer it now that I know the answer.

I challenge you, Matt Bronger, to name that movie. Okay, that's one of the dumber moves that's happened in this game. You have to bring the numbers down a little bit. Oh, you're afraid she's going to make you guess it again? The fuck she will, yeah! You seen her in the whole fucking podcast? Throwing me under a bus over and over again?

Oh, TJ, name that movie. Like you have any fucking idea what Revenge of the Nerds 2 Nerds in Paradise was. Don't fuck with me, Murphy. You knew it all along. I did. Stop playing dumb. Who told you to throw this?

Who's the fucking bookie? Who told you to throw this? Can't believe people are betting on this game. Who do they have that you love hostage? Ralph the dog. Let love hostage? Ralph the dog Let Ralph go

Ralph the dog He knew it all along Ralph the dog is about Okay, we gotta go, we gotta go This is it, this is it Alright, so you said to What just happened? Matt has to name it? Yeah, in 13

In 13 names, alright Go ahead and name it in 3 or 4 You guys, we gotta go, we gotta go What just happened? We gotta go, we gotta go Claire Forlani Anthony Clark Go ahead and name it in three or four when you know it. You guys, we got to go. We got to go. What just happened? We got to go. We got to go. Claire Forlani. Anthony Clark.

Vanessa Marcille. Danny Nucci. Boquim Woodbine. Tony Todd. John C. McGinley. John Spencer. David Morse. William Forsythe.

How many names does he get? Wait. William Forsythe. How many names does he get? Wait. Forsythe. Michael Biehn. Ed Harris. Nicholas Cage. Oh, fuck. Sorry.

The Rock. Yeah, you're sorry. Yeah, that's right. The Rock is correct. The other name is Sean Conner. All right. And Matt Bronner wins the game. Any dates coming up in a few weeks

you want to plug or TV shows or anything you're up to yeah TJ Miller I'm headlining the Hollywood Improv on July 17th and 18th

so everybody come to Melrose if you email me or do a Twitter that talks about how poorly you think I was mistreated in the podcast I'll give you free tickets

so that's fine that's a great deal alright but they have to think you were treated poorly. If they write to you and say you were treated absolutely with respect and love, then they're not getting into your show for free.

Don't just stand outside with Morgan Murphy. My comedy album is coming out on Comedy Central Records called Soak Up the Night. Yeah! So check that out. The 14th, you can go on the Comedy Central website or iTunes. What date does it come out? The 14th. Of July?

Yes. Okay. Mine comes out August 4th, same label. But not as good a title. And Morgan? Going back to work on... She's writing on Jimmy Fallon. I have a couple lines in this movie,

but it's a very good movie called World's Greatest Dad that Bobcat Goldthwait directed. It's coming out in August. Yeah, don't let Robin Williams scare you off. It's great. And then, right? Yeah, yeah, no, it's good. It's an indie dark comedy thing.

Yeah. And then I do the Benson Interruption on the second Monday of every month at Largo. You can go to www.largo-la.com for more details about that. And thanks for coming, everybody. And Peter Weller is a shithead. Poor Weller. Peter Weller.

Thanks, guys. Follow us on Twitter. All right. is viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you, cause Doug loves movies!