Doug Loves Movies - Nate Craig, Sean Jordan, "Mark Wahlberg" and Ross McCoy guest

Episode Date: September 13, 2016

Live from the Improv in Orlando, Doug welcomes Nate Craig, Sean Jordan, "Mark Wahlberg" and Ross McCoy to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds With 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Hey everybody My name is Doug, and I love movies. I love movies! Wait, who was it that just screamed?

Like, that was a cue to just scream. I have a feeling we have someone who's never heard the show before in the audience. But great job, you guys. It's great to be back here. We're coming to you once again from the Improv in Orlando, Florida. Now you can scream. Yes!

It's Saturday, September 10th, 2016, and I know from previous visits that you guys are going to show me some great name tags. Oh, my God. It's so weird when they all emerge from the crowd. You're all just sitting there so innocently. It turns out you're all protesters.

Can you imagine if at any fucking rally or something the posters were this good? We're just wasting them in here on an audio podcast. Broke Blake Mountain. Good job, Blake. The Royal Tennisons. Your last name is Tennison? Okay.

Shanghai Knights. I get it. You just blacked out a G. That's a weird sentence. What did you do last night? I blacked out a G. What? K-I-B instead of M-I-B?

What's your name? Ken. All right. Ken in black. No country for... Nicole's men. The secret life of Walter Schmitty. Your name's Schmitty? I love the name Schmitty.

That's a wacky coincidence because I was here almost exactly a year ago to this date, and I saw The Secret Life of Walter Mitty in the movie theater in this mall. In this outdoor... It's really one-stop shopping, this mall. If you want to break some plates and see a movie and pretend you're Lara Croft, whatever that thing is. Would you pay money to go to that thing?

It's called Hard Knocks? It's supposed to be an exciting laser tag? You guys love it? Is it better than the upside-down building down the street? What isn't? All right, so sorry I haven't mentioned every name tag, because there's so many, and so many great ones. So good job, a you to Akilah.

Time for Doug Plugs, Los Angeles. I'm coming back for three nights of fun. Doug Loves Movies this Monday, September 12th at Meltdown Comics, and then Tuesday night at UCB Franklin, and then Wednesday I'm doing a movie interruption at CineFamily, douglosmovies.com for details on those and other shows.

Have you guys checked out Pitch Off on Screen Junkies Plus? Has anybody seen that? Two people? Great. We're killing it. But you can see the first episode for free at screenjunkiesplus.com and then you can decide if you want to sign up for Screen Junkies. I think you should.

They've got lots of good stuff. And, yeah. DouglasMovies.com. I said it twice. From the corrections department, it is two days in the valley, not three days in the valley. I was like, Trey, it's three days in the valley, but maybe

I was just confused because his name means the number three. But two days in the valley is actually about right, because I've been to the San Fernando Valley, and two days is enough. No one would dare make something called three days in the valley. Let's look in the prize bag. I flew some stuff out special for you guys.

If I can reach it. Of course, you've heard about it on the podcast for weeks, and here it is again. Phil Bill Volume 1 Coloring Book. A peacemaker, pipe from Peacemaker, only been used once. Doug Loves Movies T-shirt. I worked out in it a couple of times. It's the shirt I wear to the gym.

A couple of coasters from an off-Broadway play I was in for a while called The Marijuana Logs. Also, some audience members brought a couple things, so I'm going to put those over here. And then... Damn, I don't have enough hands for all this shit. I brought a loot crate. We're always talking about loot crate on this show, so I brought one out from California in this bag.

And let's take a quick look and see what's in it. I haven't looked in it yet. If there's anything good, I'm going to keep it. Oh, shit. I should have undone this part ahead of time.

Maybe I'll work on it as the show progresses. Maybe find a knife. Does anybody have a knife? This is a great way to find out. If you do, okay, let's take her out. There's no knives. No, thank you.

I was just trying to find knives that are illegally here. This is a no-knife nightclub. This isn't a knife club. First rule of knife club, don't start a knife club. Let's get my guests out here. Oh boy, this is fun. We got a couple of newbies and two of your favorites are here

tonight. So please, please help me in giving a big warm welcome to Ross McCoy, Nate Craig, Sean Jordan, and Mark Wahlberg. All right. Welcome back to Five White Guys. Who love movies. Let's meet them individually, shall we? Starting on the opposite end down there.

First timer, Ross McCoy is here, everybody. Hey, Doug. Thanks for having me. Thanks for having me. Thanks for being here. You're from the A Mediocre Time podcast? Correct. All right. Some scumbags here.

What? We call our listeners scumbags. Oh, that's terrific. And then if you upgrade to the subscription service, you become a BDM. That's a big dick millionaire, Doug. We got some big dick millionaires here right now? Oh, shit.

Okay. I don't have any follow-up questions to that. I mean, what happens on the podcast in general? So, it's me. I'm kind of the third Mike, and then it's two guys that started out in radio here in town And then they developed such

Started a podcast like as a goof And then it became such a big thing That they decided to make their full time jobs And now that's what we do for a living Yeah thank you guys That's very cool You seriously have a radio voice going on down there Thank you very much

Hey, how's it going? Alright, it's great to be here And I'll be chipping in with weather on the ones, Doug How's the traffic here on I-Drive? I-4's a fucking nightmare, Doug. All right, if you're going to just throw around your local references and get big laughs, I could have you removed also.

I've got the knife now. You're the captain now, Doug. Yep. Okay, well, thank you for being here, and good luck today in the games and whatnot. You feel confident? I'm real good at the Leonard Moulton games, so let's bring it on.

Let's get started. Let's do this. Kill it at Leonard Moulton games. All right, well, not part of the plan today, but... I'm sure you can apply those skills to other games, or is bidding the only thing you're good at? I started listening to you when you could

go back and download every episode of a podcast on iTunes, and I used to be real not good at the Leonard Moulton game. It flummoxed me, and then right when you phased it out, I got good at it. Oh, that old story. Alright, let's skip down here to next to me, another first time guest on the

show. It's Nate Craig, everybody! It's an honor to be here. Thank you, Doug. What's your Twitter name? Nate Craig Live. Nate Craig Live. Because all your tweets are live. They're really happening when you tweet them. And Nate Craig was not taken. Yeah, who's this other Nate Craig?

What does he do? I think he went to Harvard, so he's a big deal. Jesus, why does he need Twitter? And you are based out in Los Angeles now, correct? Los Angeles, California. Yeah, and you came out to... On the nose. And you came out here

for a bachelor party? Yeah, we're going to go to the Packer game tomorrow at Jacksonville. Yeah, yeah, he's going to root for the other team, though. Oh, so he gets to throw out local references like that, and I don't get to throw out I-4, huh? I didn't say you couldn't do them. I just said I would have you removed from the showroom.

I just want there to be a road named I-Drive. That was good. I honestly don't want to be thrown out, but that's what this road right here is called. Oh, that's real. I thought you were just coming up with that. No, no. I thought it was hilarious.

What's the traffic on I-Drive? Good one, Doug. No. It's short for International Drive. Correct. Oh, I-Drive. Did you have to ever, you had to look up the address to come here, didn't you? I didn't put those two things together

On International Drive I'm not quick, Doug Alright, well good luck today then Because you've got some tough customers Sitting next to you is Sean Jordan, everybody Big hit with the teenage demographic that listens to this show. Why is that?

I don't know. The teenage demographic is just some girl named Irma. What's up? In Illinois. But what are you doing here, man? I just... The other day when you won... If you haven't heard that one...

That motherfucker? And when you won, I thought I'd bring back the old, you know, tradition of inviting the winner back to the next episode, and it's here, and you came all the way out here for it. I do what I do. I'm here to win again.

Oh, alright. Gauntlet thrown down. And thank you for patiently waiting for your introduction. Mark Wahlberg is here. How you guys doing? You doing good? What's up, Orlando? Let's fucking do this shit! Oh, man.

Oh, boy. How do you have any free time? You're always making movies. I am fucking making movies. Yeah, and Deepwater Horizon opens soon. It's gonna be so good, dude. Nobody's excited about that. They should be. I stopped that fucking spill.

Wait, no, it kept spilling and spilling for months and months and months. No, we rebooted that shit. Oh, it's kind of a new, a different telling of the Deepwater Horizon story? You're American. You'll see it. He's right

I will it's because I'm in America plus I'm in town because I made a promise so I'm here what was the promise? I promised Donnie if he finished

all the Shel Silverstein books I would take him to Disney it was cute I had a little card. It said, Donnie, where the sidewalk ends is Disneyland. And then he goes, really? I go, no, Disney World. Get in the fucking car. Yeah, it seems like if you're out in L.A.,

it'd be easier to just go to Disneyland. No. It's actually not, because then he thinks he should be able to drive. I'm like, it's a long trip. You need a nap. because then he thinks he should be able to drive. I'm like, it's a long trip. You need a nap.

You ever been to Epcot? Nope. What is it? I wish I could just say what Epcot stands for, what the letters mean, but I always forget it. Futuristic. Episcopalian. I'd help you out, Doug, but this security guy's been really looking at me since you put that ultimatum

down. Don't worry, you're sitting next to Mark. Episcopalian. Presbyterian. Experimental prototype city of tomorrow. I felt like a newscaster, like somebody said it into my earpiece. Oh shit!

I lost my new iPhone earpieces. Already! Alright, so I opened up the loot crate and there's some pretty awesome stuff in here. There's an Archer T-shirt. Should have closed with that

maybe. A Harley Quinn figure. Let's see. There's some sort of... They always have a pin. What is that? What is that pin, Nate? That's your basic World of Warcraft pin.

Oh, this is kind of fun. A Hellboy deodorant. I'm sorry, ceramic bank. And then the most fun part of the loot crate, it's kind of a little challenge you can have for yourself, is try to put everything back in the fucking loot crate after you've looked at it, because it's impossible. No, wait.

I think I can do it. This is a very nice World of Warcraft pin. Oh, there you go. World of Warcraft. Nice. And then it also comes with an issue of Loot Crate Magazine. The letters section is my favorite part. And yeah, so all of that is going into the prize bag.

In addition to what my guests brought, what do you have for us, Mr. McCoy? Hey, Doug. I brought you some Tom and Dan stuff, your BDMs. I got a pussy admiral hat. What's a pussy admiral hat? A lot of the stuff is just jokes

that only make sense in the context of we're fucking around. Ask me that question. Ask me that question. Doug, what's a pussy admiral? Hat. It's a rank up from twat sergeant. And three ranks below me. I like how you said you're fucking around

with a pussy admiral hat. Not for a second did I think you weren't fucking around with a pussy admiral. Like you really were going to name someone the pussy admiral. Pussy admiral hat. And where that comes from, we wanted to make a hat like the veterans wear for the USS ship that they served in. It looks like scrambled eggs on the bill of the hat. We wanted to make one of those. I don't know.

I don't know. Made it for the pussy admiral. All right, BDMs, help me out here. That's cool, right? And then opposite end of the spectrum, one of those shitty dry fit shirts that nobody would buy. A bunch of stuff laying around the studios. Tom and Dan magnets, pins.

I got some stuff from our sponsors. I got a bottle of rum from Marlin Barrel Craft Distillery. In Jacksonville, I got a pound of veterans. Are you in the middle of a move and you just brought everything? I live here, Doug. I've been planning my prize bag for a whole month now.

Maybe we should have gotten everybody else's first because this is a lot of stuff. Pound of veterans, coffeecompany.com, coffee to go with the rum. They're beautiful together. And then Diesel Glass Inc.

in Orlando, all American made, hand-blown glass. They're beautiful together. And then Diesel Glass Inc. in Orlando, all American-made, hand-blown glass. They gave me I guess you could use it as like a flower vase of some sort. It's about a I don't know, a two and a half foot flower vase with two trees in the stem and an ice pinch. Dude, you brought like the fucking Mary Poppins bag of things.

And also from Diesel Glass, I guess if you would use that thing as a flower vase this would be a vase for if you distill your flowers into a very fine oil and then heat

a quartz bowl that's included with a blowtorch and then you know smoke some roses or something okay so we'll take the

sixth caller right now if you want to buy that shit I am gonna need the phrase that pays and that's it Doug oh that's it

oh no actually I forgot I'm going to need the phrase that pays. And that's it, Doug. Oh, that's it? Oh, no. Actually, I forgot. For the listener at home, this is still going. In honor of Jeff Tate, I brought two novelizations. It's the Alan Dean Foster double pack. It's Star Wars Episode I, The Force Awakens by Alan Dean Foster. And old school throwback, Clash of the Titans by Alan Dean Foster, straight from the Goodwill,

and a copy of the last film I watched. Okay, we'll get to that in a second. Now you guys don't have to look at anything on Craigslist. He just read it to you. Mark, do you want to fight that prize bag? What? Do you want to fight that prize bag? No, why should it lose?

You want to fight that prize bag? No, why should it lose? Alright, so Mark, what do you have for the bag? Well, you know, I put a lot of thought in it too, so... I brought a book. Seems like it's... Okay, you brought a book. The greatest fucking book ever written. I used to read this to myself before I went to sleep.

It's a paperback version of Adventures in Babysitting. That's how it's done. Yeah, it's that easy. Also, can I get a Jack and Coke with hydroxy cut in it? Extra hydroxy cut? That'd be great. Look at this fucking bomb!

You know, you could put this on top of Adventures of Fucking Babysitting or something. It'd be good for that. And then like a dab version of that. Wow, that looks like... That should be in the middle of the seance in the Haunted Mansion. Damn.

I thought I'd do a local reference myself. Adventures in Babysitting Novelization. Let's just pick a line and see what it says. With the exception of... You're going to do a line? Okay, yeah, Mark. Guess which novelization this is from. Okay.

With the exception of the one street lamp, they were underneath. The street was pitch black. Somewhere in the night, there was a scream. In another direction, a man... Oh, my God. Can't even... Something funny might happen.

The 1988 paperback version of National Lampoon's Adventures in Babysitting. That's a dark book. What do you got for the bag there, Sean? I have a bunch of candy. Sour Patch Kids. No $200 glass bong? No, I don't live here.

I didn't know what a bong was until you pulled it out. They should have given you one at the airport. I'm very sorry. That's a failure on our part as a city. I don't have an album. He gave me a couple copies. He's fantastic. It's on Kill Rockstars and also

tweeted them to put an album out with me and then maybe I'll be able to get my own shit out one of these days. And then AMC gift card for 20 bucks. What's up, dog? I got some cheers. 20 fucking bones American at AMC. What do you think about that?

American money at AMC, Mark? Yeah, you should be using it at another local reference. Wahlburgers. Come on out, guys. It's fucking great. I think I'd rather go to Joey Fatone's Hot Dogs. No, you would not. No, you would not.

That is for people with low self-esteem. Is that real, though? Yeah. What a glorious day to be in town. That hot dog store is opening. He has a hot dog he calls the fat one, right? Yeah, it's his hot dog. Under no circumstances would you go to joey fatone's hot dog store

hell no dude you know how long you'd have to run to burn one of those off why not just run there and back you know what fuck it i'm gonna go to joey fatone's i talked you into it uh this little quick mini game real fast because an audience member brought a couple of DVDs for the prize bag, which I don't encourage people to do because we already got plenty of crap in the bag. But this is a director's cut of Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan.

Who was the person who brought these? Where you at? You! Hey, dude, what's your name? Edward. I don't know why that's funny. Edward. Edward. Are you't know why that's funny. Edward. Are you lighting yourself up right now?

Someone's lighting you up. Dick Friend is. Yeah. You're really illuminated right now. It's really strange. It's like a scene in a documentary. No one knew the pervert was amongst them. It's like he's the only thing we could see. I just want him

to start saying, mecca lecca hi, mecca hi ni ho. It's funny, the light appeared right when Mark's attention was placed on him. Fuckin' A, dude. It's called a gift. You're welcome. Alright, well, also in the bag is, I didn't even know there were four Free Willy movies.

I didn't know Willy had to four Free Willy movies. I didn't know Willy had to be freed repeatedly like that. Just got different capture situations, I guess. Maybe he likes it. Yeah, he's got Stockholm Syndrome. But you guys, anybody know the names of any of the other Free Willys other than

Free Willy 1? Wasn't the last one Free Willy Welcome to SeaWorld? Hashtag shut down SeaWorld. But really quick. Hey, you two ladies right there, you're just talking to each other the entire time. It's driving me and everyone around you nuts.

So can you please leave? Is that possible? Because I don't think you're going to change because you don't listen to Doug Lowe's movies. You do? You know what's happening up here and you're talking constantly? Are you describing it to her? What have you guys had to talk about? What's so important to talk about right now? What? I heard you so much clearer when I was trying to do a show and you weren't supposed to be talking now when I'm asking you a question you're not answering me in a voice that I can hear what's going on she loves me so that's what you're just talking about how much you love me

what I'm such an asshole I'm ruining this could be the woman of my dreams and I'm telling her to shut up because I'm trying to asshole. I'm ruining, this could be the woman of my dreams. And I'm telling her to shut up because I'm trying to do a fucking show. Some of these other people here too love me and they're just watching and listening to what we're saying and responding accordingly. So please, I love you too, but stop doing that. And I feel like you can't stop.

Are you guys already drunk? Are you? Just seat them in the back so they can talk all they want. Come grab them and just put them in different seats. Or you can just leave. Either way. Here's the plan. When we get to the show, we will ruin the show. And then he will definitely talk to us. Free Willy Wonka.

Oh, that's a good one. He got trapped Free Willy to Could someone that works here Come and escort these ladies To seats in the back Thank you very much Or you know Put them right by

Tequilum's cage at SeaWorld That's a good spot too probably Local rep friends Welcome to the We have a fish that murders People in Orlando, you guys. Doug Benson is so shitty to his best fans. Me too, Doug.

That's the lesson that's going to come from this. Just like tequilum. You've got to stop with the tequilum references. Because first of all, it sounds too much like tequila. And it's just sad. All right, Free Willy 2, The Adventure Home. Free Willy 3, The Rescue. And Free Willy 4, Escape...

From SeaWorld. What does that say? Free Willy 4, the cove. Escape from Pirate's Cove. Pirate's Cove? Escape from Johnny Depp. That's not fair, though, because Donnie has that four-pack, Mark.

What? Donnie has no pack. Certainly doesn't have a six pack. No, hell no. I'm like, Donnie, what are you going to do today other than not work out? He seems like he's in pretty good shape. He actually is.

But he's no me, so by comparison, it's like he's a bad Xerox copy of something great. Which actually is still pretty great. Nate, what did you bring for the prize bag? All right, I brought Harold Ramis. I brought a Harold Ramis value pack. I got Ghostbusters. I got Stripes. And I got Analyze This.

And then I got a Caddyshack poster. Boom. Very nice. And then I got two albums of my own that I'll give to whoever wins the thing. Yeah, and you'll have some for them to buy afterwards if anybody wants to say hi and bye? Absolutely. Here, give me those DVDs. We'll put them right in here. Boom. If you guys are having a hard time finding the hydroxy cut, I'll just take the jacket. In fact, ice is even optional.

In fact, ice is even optional. Or you know what? I'll take just hydroxy cut. Either one. I couldn't be having more fun. You're welcome. They were annoying you guys, right? Okay, good. I didn't want to have misread this? Yes. Okay, good.

I didn't want to have misread the situation entirely. Oh, man. Dude, it was like you called them out and then everybody... I was hoping for a yeah, but it was more like... And Donnie's going to need a table when he's done at Monkey Joe's. No, he's not allowed to leave until I get there. Is that another local reference? It's like right downstairs. I wanted a spotlight on him

like Steve Martin and the Lonely Guy. Or like our friend the pervert. Make a like a hi. I bet you're not a pervert. Edward the pervert. I hope at the next show someone bringsvert. Edward the pervert. I hope at the next show,

someone brings a sign, Edward the pervert. Hands. Edward the pervert hands? Yes. Hi, I just moved in next door. I'm required to tell you that I'm Edward the pervert hands.

Do you want a haircut? Can I clip your hedges? Yeah. I just bought the house next door. I'm required to tell you that I'm Edward the Pervert Hans. Do you want a haircut? Can I clip your hedges? Yeah. I just bought the house next door. I'll be here for the rest of your existence. Or until you dip out. Okay, really quickly, because everything is taking too long. What's your last movie

you saw there, Ross? Last night, I sat down with my family. We watched 10 Cloverfield Lane. What do you got? Like a two-year-old, a six-year-old? It was me, the wife. I got a 13-year-old and a nine-year-old. Nine for that movie?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's tough. The last thing we saw in theaters was Suicide Squad. So he's in the world today. So he knows all about suicide. He's seen squads. He's seen some stuff. And it was fun because I wanted to see what he thought going through it,

not having no idea what Cloverfield was or anything going in. And it was funny because there's the initial scene, and then she wakes up locked up in that room, and he was just befuddled, like, what happened? And then I was like, well, we'll find out what happened as we go. And he was just making guesses. It's about time he learns how movies work. This isn't real.

What's going on? It's a movie. Just watch. It'll continue to go on right before your eyes. G-rated stuff proceeds at a more linear pace. When you put a gap in there, it confuses the kids. That's a good point. Mark, what's the last movie you saw?

Did you see anything on the plane? You know what? I just saw a screening of Patriot's Day. That's another one of your movies? Yeah. And you guys are going to fucking love it. What's like an example of something that you say in that movie?

Okay, ready? On your mark, get set, go. Patriot Games? No, Day. Oh, Patriot Day. See, I couldn't get it right even though you just told me the title. Shit.

Is this one of the holiday movies like Valentine's Day or New Year's Day? No, it's less of a Gary Marshall and more of an American tragedy that took place in Boston type movie. But it's still pretty heartwarming. Oh shit, it's about the Boston bombing.

It's going to be great. People are going to love it. Moving on. Stop it. I feel like those guys were not patriots. It's not about them. Which of the brothers do you play, Mark? You can play anything. I play the Mark? I mean, you can play anything

I play the bomb and I refuse to go off I look at those fucking terrorists And I go, fuck you, motherfucker Guess what I'm not doing today? Going off You don't fucking set off a bomb in my town Fuck you Why don't you go hide out on a boat

and I'll fucking shoot you in the leg. Oh, boy. Sean? I saw Trainwreck. I watched it on the plane. Fun movie. Yeah, it was fun. Yeah.

LeBron James, very talented comedic actor. He did way better than I thought he was going to do. Right? And Amari Stoudemire also. They both did way better than I thought he was going to do. And Amari Stoudemire also. They both did way better than I thought they would do. And John Cena's really funny. He is really funny. It's all around funny, that movie.

I like it more now. I mean, I already liked it, but now I like it more after we talked about it. Unless, what did you think about it, Mark? Do you like that movie or no? Is that the one with the guy from Glory and Chris Pine? Which guy from Glory? I think he calls Morgan Freeman the guy from Glory. No, the other dude.

I would say Denzel Washington is the man from Glory. He was in Two Guns With Me, and then he was in that train movie with Christopher Pines. Denzel Washington. Yeah, and they were on a train. I know. All right. Was it called Super 8?

What the fuck was that movie called? Oh, with Amy? Fucking great movie. I know. Was it called Super 8? What the fuck was that movie called? Oh, with Amy? Fucking great movie. I love that movie. Then yeah, I like Trainwreck. Nate? I saw The Theory of Everything. Whoa, the... What's his name?

Stephen Hawking. Yeah, the younger, sexier Stephen Hawking. That one takes place before, the younger, sexier Stephen Hawking. Before, that one takes place before he gets the sex change, right? Yeah. It's before he becomes a Danish girl. Yeah. And before Jupiter ascends.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah, that guy's quite good in that. He's excellent. And I like that Felicity Jones. I'm excited that she's a Star Wars character. They were both excellent. Yeah. I like the movie. There you go'm excited that she's a Star Wars character. They were both excellent. I like the movie.

There you go. All right, that's what we saw. I'm not going to tell you what I saw last because I don't remember and I don't have time. I think The Meddler was the last movie I saw. I liked it. You can turn off your cell phone now. Your cell phone.

You can turn the show off now, Bert, because it's time for me to say, let the games begin! Lots of great ones to choose from, gentlemen. So pick your name tags. Can I get a Jameson on the rocks, please? Put your microphones down and go pick your name tags. You don't need a microphone to pick

a name tag. Put your microphone down. Go pick your name tags. You don't need a microphone to pick a name tag. Put your microphone down. Go get a name tag. And while you guys do that, I'm going to do this. There's no earthly way of knowing Which direction we are rowing Or which way the river's flowing Is it raining? Is it snowing? Is a hurricane a-blowing?

Not a speck of light is showing So the danger must be growing And the fires of hell aglowing Is the grizzly reaper mowing Yes! Gene? The danger must be growing for the rowers. Keep on rowing.

And they're certainly not showing any sign that they are slowing. And then all of you should have been back. Mark? Is Mark still here? Mark? He had to get a few reps in, right? Oh, here we go. There's a deadlift back there.

Everything's a deadlift. Thank you, everybody, for bringing such great name tags and for not getting too yelly about pick me, pick me. Ross, what do you got there? You got a little lightsaber? Yeah, lightsaber, light up, name tag, the return of the Jodi., The Return of the Jodi. Star Wars Return of the Jodi.

For the listener at home, Ross is trying to think of a local reference for Return of the Jodi. Because this is a show called Doug Loves Local References. You can see in the background there, the Epcot Center is not fully functional, you guys. It's not quite fully functional. Not bad.

Mark? Breakfast at Brittany's. Yep, that's it. That's Brittany on there instead of what's her name? It's either that or her name's Breakfast. And then why would Britney be in there? Yeah. Audrey Hepburn.

I don't know. Maybe they made a fucking sequel. I don't control all of Hollywood. What percentage do you think you control, though? 76%. Very patriarch number. Do you control, though? 76%. Very patriarch number. Do you fucking know it? Sean, who are you playing for?

John. It's John's... John flew over the cuckoo's nest, I believe. Whoa. Yeah. He thinks John and one rhyme, which is strike one, but... It doesn't have to rhyme. I know.

I'm just trying to be a dick, you know, for no reason. But then it's just a big picture of me? Well, it's got a lot of people's names on it. One of them is mine. I've never made it onto a name tag, so I was happy about that. Oh, okay. I think your face may have gotten onto somebody's. Does somebody have Sean's face on their name tag?

I thought somebody showed me one. Yeah, I get it. You're talented in many areas. God, that's so weird. You fucking know it, dude. You can do a lot of stuff that I can't do. I can do a lot of stuff to people that you can't do. Mark, are you your own cell phone ring?

I'm my own everything, dude. There's two things I care about. Can I lift it? And is this a mirror? Now I know what I'm going to get you for Christmas. A really big mirror. Fuck yeah, dude. Let's knock it down to one question.

Can I lift this really big mirror? You're great, Doug. The answer is always yes, right, Mark? The answer is always you're welcome. Who are you playing for? Oh, you got Schmitty! Nate's playing for Schmitty. This is Kyle down here.

The Secret Life of Walter Schmitty. There you go. We talked about that one at the top of the show. And I don't know why we're getting feedback-y noise, so maybe just try to not be so close. Get away from me, Nate. Am I taking credit for that? I don't know.

I don't know what's making it happen. Marks do swole up. We're all squishing against each other. That is a YP, not an MP. A Mark problem? It's actually a line from Boogie Nights, and it stands for your problem, not my problem. All right, Mark problem? It's actually a line from Boogie Nights, and it stands for your problem, not my problem. All right, Mark problem.

The first game... The first thing we're going to do is play a little game called Purple Rain Man. The... Let's do this, Breakfast. The various... Her name is Brittany. The various...

The various, her name is Brittany, the various... You can guess as often as you want. Just guess right into your microphones. I'm going to start naming the stars of this mashup movie, starting with the third billed people, and then the second, and then the first. And just figure out the mashup movie title. Third billing in this movie. There's your drink,

Mark. Thank you guys so much for that. Yeah. Thanks, dude. Oh, I'll take another Tito's and soda when you get a chance. No rush. One more water, too, please. Thank you. Another water? Thanks, man. No, it's a fucking waterfall of waters. I call it a Mark-rophone.

I like that. Jack O'Connell and Mary Gibbs. Yeah. It's the guy in the back. Don't act like you know what it is. That was Edward, and he fucking knows everything. Edward's touching people. All right, second build in this movie.

Julia Roberts and John Goodman. What? What could this be? Everybody's thinking real hard. And the crowd has turned. She's putting her head down like she knows already what... Or is that somebody sitting near her? Oh, that's the guy sitting next to her.

Aaron Brock, which we're hard to tell. I just like the psychology of this. Oh, that's the guy sitting next to her. Aaron Brock, which we're I just like the psychology of this. Why did that happen? You just got excited that you thought you knew it? Yeah. That's all people ever have to do. Amy Adams once was like, I just said it. I don't know.

But here's the thing. Sean, can you lean back so I can see this lady? What's your name? Trey? Traith? Like faith? Very pretty. Okay. And what was your answer going to be?

Charlie Wilson's War. So the idea is it's two movie titles squished together and in this case neither of them is that one. I only get really mad when they have the right answer. Alright. And top build

in this movie mashup are George Clooney and Billy Crystal. Johnny Wilson! Frayth no more. Sorry, Trayth. Damn, dude. Is it a tough one?

Who was it? George Clooney and Billy Crystal. So you gotta take a movie that had Julia Roberts and George Clooney, and the title mashes into a movie that had George Goodman and Billy Crystal. There's only four examples of each. John Goodman. When I say George, Georgie Goodman! John Goodman, Billy Crystal say George? Georgie Goodman. John Goodman.

Billy Crystal. You're right on it, you guys. You're so close to it. It is kind of a tough one, I'll say that. Who's Billy Crystal? He was always the one standing next to Wait, I got it. Robin and the whoopee.

What? You got it? I got part of it. Oh, okay. You gotta get all of it. So we're gonna have to we gotta wrap this up so I'm going to

just say it out loud and the first person who repeats it back Money Monster something. But to wrap this up, so I'm going to just say it out loud, and the first person who repeats it back... Money Monster something. But... Money Monsters, Inc. That's correct.

You hear that, breakfast? Most important meal of the day. Fuck yeah, dude. I'm pretty sure her name's Breakfast, because when I walk by, she's like, you can eat me. And I was like, are you a diner? She goes, I'm open 24-7. Breakfast.

I made it up. She didn't say 24-7. She said 6 a.m. to 4 p.m. She's just a part-time slut. Aren't we all? Deep down, yes. Let's play Ron Bennington's Adjusted for Inflation Bureau game. Box office mojo rising.

So, a couple things. Great. You're playing for points. The idea is I'll name an actor or actress and we'll go down the line each of you get to guess

a movie you think is in that person's top four on box office mojo adjusted for inflation top you know top box office hits but

there you go wait wasn't there something else oh it was mine for the listener at home Doug is surprised Wait, wasn't there something else? It was mine For the listener at home, Doug is surprised I care about the listener at home, Doug I don't know what it was supposed to be

But I thought I remembered something else I thought one of you guys ordered something else But I guess it was just me and the water. Okay, so have I sufficiently described this? Oh, you don't have to buzz in. We'll start with Mark since he won that game, and then we'll rotate.

We'll go to Ross, then Nate, then Sean, and then each round we'll move it over one so that everybody gets a chance to go first. I know we're pressed for time, Doug. I was admiring my shadow, so if you could just run through it real quick one more time.

Or just go. I'll figure it out. I'll make it super easy for you. That would be everything. Yeah. It would be everything. Yeah. If you get their top movie, each person only gets to guess one movie. You can't guess a movie that's been guessed previously. So if you guess their top box office movie, that's worth three points.

Second, two, third, one. Fourth, I don't give a fuck. second, two, third, one. Fourth, I don't give a fuck. And the first name you're going to try to guess on is Lindsay Lohan. You have to name what you think is in her top three, hopefully the top movie she's been in, and keep in mind it's adjusted for inflation.

Okay. What do you got? Parent Trap. Okay. Some people agree with you. Ross? Herbierap. Okay. Some people agree with you. Ross? Herbie the Love Bug. All right, that isn't even what it was called, but okay.

Nate? What was the Prairie Home Companion one, the one she did with? That's what it's called. That was a huge grossing one. You got it. Yeah, you pretty much said it with just a couple extra words there on it. Sean? Mean Girls?

All right. Coming in at number one, no one got the three-pointer, Freaky Friday. Big hit, where she switched bodies with Jamie Lee Curtis and just went nuts for Activia. Big hit where she switched bodies with Jamie Lee Curtis and just went nuts for Activia.

This is Lindsay Lohan in the freezer aisle shoving Activias in her face. And then picking up two points with the parent trap is Mark Wahlberg. See, I knew you'd catch on quickly, Mark. Fuckin' A, dude. Yeah. And then...

And then getting one point for Mean Girls is Sean Jordan. Goddamn right. So I didn't get points with that answer. Nope. And I'm interrupting Mean Girls at CineFamily in L.A. on Monday, October 3rd. All right.

Next name. Ross,, October 3rd. All right. Next name. Ross, you start us off. What's in the top three for Mr. Seth Green? The audience is stunned by that one. Ooh. Ooh. Seth Green, go. Green light, go.

If I could do that cricket noise, I would, but I can't. Mark, you want to do it for him? Time's up, dude. That was a whistle. That was a cricket jumping on a buzzer. It sounded like a giant cricket. I know you hate when people describe movies. What's the one where he tries to give Alicia Silverstone the bong and says it's a kitchen appliance?

God damn it. Oh, yeah, that one. Fuck. I'm clueless. Doug, I'm going to say clueless. Okay, no. Clueless fully loaded. Right, herpy fully loaded was the one you got wrong the last time.

I'm really good at this game like a minute later. Okay. You're on another time zone. Nate? Awesome powers. Full title. Fully loaded. International man of espionage.

You don't have to tell him like that. Sean. I deserve it Austin Powers International Man of Mystery no I'll say Goldmember

can I say Goldmember since you just full title Austin Powers and Goldmember I'm not gonna tell you whether you're right

or wrong or not but that's your answer Mark I think you told me his best movie is called Airborne but fucking A

Devil's Backbone kids that's the Air Bud prequel right I can't say the one other people said so But, fucking A, Devil's Backbone, kids. That's the Air Bud prequel, right? I can't say the one other people said, so fuck it. I will go with Can't Hardly Wait. It's such a good movie. It's a great movie, but it's not top. I think it made a lot of money.

It should be. It should be. All right, so we got four answers. Coming in at number... I'm surprised no one said the Italian job because you're in that, of course, Mark.

I was just there for my stuff. Okay. You don't even know who else was there. I don't do turnarounds. Your stuff with Seth Green? No. You have scenes together.

Yeah, but I don't do turnarounds. I was there for one half a day to drive a Mini, the other half a day to go, guys, we did it. That's the whole

fucking movie. I like that movie. All right. Yeah, because I'm in it. You're welcome. Yeah, I forgot to add that part. I was not saying. Number right. Yeah, because I'm in it. You're welcome. Yeah, I forgot to add that part. I was not saying.

Number three was Enemy of the State. Yeah, he was like a tech nerd in a truck with Jack Black, I think. And then number two, two points to Sean Jordan for Austin Powers in Goldmember. Austin Powers in Goldmember. And you really avoided a bullet there, Sean, with not saying the other title that you started to say because it did not do that great in the theaters. It was not even adjusted for inflation. It isn't in the top three.

Number one is Austin Powers, The Spy Who Shagged Me. Yeah, part two, if you will. And I'll be in Austin in a couple few days at Fantastic Fest from September 22 to 29. Sean has three points. Mark has two.

That's all we need to say right now. Get in the game, Nate. I'm not good with subtitles. You too, Ross. Alright, I promise only one of the three answers in this next one has a subtitle. Who's up first

this time? Nate. Oh, Nate. Great. Nate Craig, actually. Yes, it's pronounced Craig, not great. But that is not a terrible idea to change your last name to great. Nate Great. Like breakfast did, but...

Fuck yeah, breakfast. But using different words. I can't wait until three years from now and people are like, why do they call you Breakfast? Nate, what do you think is in Beyonce's top three? From her film career of maybe seven or eight movies? Shh.

Shh. I don't even want to hear crickets. Anything? Beyonce live. Anything? Beyonce live. Eh? Eh?

Eh? Sean? Dreamgirls. Mark? Mark. She's in Dreamgirls, right? Did Lemonade get a theatrical release? I think Lemonade's only an hour long. Okay.

Fuck. What have you done, B? What have you done? Fuck it. The B movie. Oh, yeah. She'd probably be in that, right? That's as good as I got.

Queen B? No. Yeah. Okay. Ross? I think Beyonce's highest grossing film is probably the video for Invoke giving him something he can feel.

Is that a real answer? No. I just don't know any Beyonce movies. Don't worry about it. We gotta go to traffic right now. What's it looking like on I-Drive? On the way to Joey Fatone's hot dog shop by the Epcot Center.

Alright, my go-to fallback answer JFK. You're thinking of Kevin Costner. She wasn't even Beyonce'd yet when they made that movie. Alright, coming in at number three an animated epic Oh, it's called Epic. And then...

Sean Jordan with two points for Dreamgirls. And I am deeply sad for all of you that no one remembered that she's in the movie we were just talking about. Is it Austin Powers? Austin Powers. And gold member is number one. I bet Charlie Wilson's war remembered.

She's excited. She knew it and didn't say it. One step at a time, baby. Tate? It'd be fucked up if her and Edward started dating after this. That would be... Edward, get over there, playboy. Did you bring a name tag, Trace?

Trace. No. Well, next time, if you want an idea for one, I'd go with... Star Trek, The Trace of Khan. Or Keeping the Traith. Oh, yes. Starring your friend Ed Norton.

Well, I know who he is. Okay, so Sean has five points and Mark has two. And this is the final round, final chance for everybody to catch up. There'll be a tie breaker if you do. Michael Caine. And it starts with Mark. Right? Or Sean? Starts with me. Yeah, okay

Sean. Start this fucker off. The Michael Caine movie. The Dark Knight mark no I mean fuck you guys kidding you guys are dope work I feel like a lot of people saw Cider House Rules. I know when I saw it, I was like, Cider House Rules? This is the most awesome movie about abortion ever. It's not about abortion, but...

It's about an apple juice. It's a plot point. Apple juice factory. Well, I'll get it wrong too Fuck it We'll go The Dark Knight Returns Hey listen you fucking

Normal people This is how this works I can come out here And be like fucking Zool And be a goddamn god But I've gotta keep it normal So it's fair Doug talked to me before

Every show And asked me to play nice like fucking Zool. It'd be a goddamn god. But I've got to keep it normal so it's fair. Doug talked to me before every show and asked me to play nice. Zool was the god you picked. That's not even jewelry that Mark is wearing. That's a fucking manacle that Doug made him wear to slow him down

just a little bit. It's actually, it's Zoolery is what it is. This bracelet weighs 47 pounds. And for the listener at home, I'm proving it. Oh, boy. All right. Ross?

Doug, Austin Powers, The Spy Who Shagged Me. No? Okay. No, he isn't that. He isn't that. Nate? Batman Begins. Yeah, that's a fucking good answer.

All right. So coming in at number three, Inception. Inception was number three. Number two, The Dark Knight Rises. Fuck. Why are you gesturing like you got it right? You didn't say that. Are you talking to me, Doc? Yeah.

Because I know what I didn't say. All right. And coming in at number one for Michael Caine, The Dark Knight. Three more points for Sean, who gives him a crazy-ass lead. He ran away with that one. It's not even within reach at this point.

No, well, no, it's because the game is over. The tiebreaker was Morgan Freeman, if you want to guess real fast. Shawshank Redemption. Or was that just open to anyone? Yeah, and no. Because that was also one that became more of a hit on home video

and didn't make a ton of money initially. March of the Penguins? I don't think they pay those penguins shit, so low overhead. No, that didn't make it, Ross money initially. March of the Penguins? I don't think they pay those penguins shit, so low overhead. No, that didn't make it, Ross. Now you see me again? That's not what it's called. I know.

The Dark Knight. Yeah, again, Dark Knight is number one. That was kind of a logical extension there. Dark Knight Rises is number two. And number three is Bruce Almighty. Yeah. A little fun in there. So he's either a guy who's good at fixing shit or God.

I'm both. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Trace it to the bank. Tracing Amy? You know what I really enjoyed was Trath Ventura, Pet Detective. I really like the movie Fear.

I should have said that one in Nashville. Motherfucker. Oh yeah, in Nashville you were remembering your favorites. You mean just remembering. Now I got both your cherries. Fucking hate that. Traithers. What?

Traithers. Nice. I felt like Chris Hardwick when he's like, wants to give points really bad, but nobody laughs. It's just like, oh, okay. Moving on. Let's play Last Man Stanton. Who won that thing?

Sean did. I did. Sean did. Sean did. I gave my points to Mark just because he's next to me. What? No, I didn't. That's what happens, dude. Mark, do you take points

when somebody gives them to you? Yeah, and then I carry them with me wherever I fucking go. That's what's happening. Happening. Happening. Itening. Happening. It's an American classic. I like all these signs on stage.

Takes a village. All right, let's... You guys are unbreakable with this shit. Let's go dance later. Maybe have a boogie night type situation. No, I gotta go hang out with this lady in the water I can do this all fucking day brother What if I transform into that lady in the water

Now we're getting off Fuck that Can we do Jason Tratham for Last Man's Phantom I just Today I nicknamed one of my farts The last Airbender. What? That was good.

Alright, so Sean gets to go first in a round of Last Man Stanton. And that's of course where we get a name of an actor or actress from a preselected audience member. And what if it was those girls I kicked out? And then we move, you know, we take turns. And if you can't think of one, you're out. But you get to use the person who you chose for your name tag is your lifeline. So, Schmitty, be ready to help Nate.

Thank you. And who's going to help Nate. Thank you. Who's going to help you down there, Ross? What was the name of your tag? Joe, right over here. Joe, yeah, Joe. Be ready, you guys. Joe doesn't seem into it, though. Yeah, he's more into Joe than Joe is. Story of Joe's life.

Interesting. Alright, so where is sheltered underscore Yoshi? Oh, it's a lady. Why sheltered underscore Yoshi? You like Mario. What's up, girl? The word sheltered just seemed to fit.

Rolls off the tongue. What? It wasn't taken yet. Oh, thank goodness. What other Yoshis did you go through? She tried to go with Sheltered Yoshi Live, but it was... It's available.

You know who had no problem getting their name? Trayth. You should have gone with Yoshi Yoshi and the Yoshi Bunch. All right, so... You know what? I'm going to give you one, Doug. I think you made a bad one.

I can feel the vibrations. Give it to me, give it to me. There's your one, too. Feel it, feel it. Was that a parody on a popular band that you were in at one point or no? No, that was a help. Like, I...

Okay. There was this poor, unfortunate group of parolees. You watched that on New Kids, and then... Fucking A, dude. Are you in a contest to see how hard you can be hit? It's not a bad game. Line up. Okay. Line up. Okay, so, Yoshi?

Okay. Is that what you say every time someone tells you? Yeah, whenever somebody says Yoshi, she's like, Matthew McConaughey. That's how she feels about everything. Is the yogurt bad in the fridge, Yoshi? Matthew McConaughey. So that's who it is, I guess. Matthew McConaughey.

I'm sure there's lots of people in the audience who tweeted me today that feel like they had a better one. People say to me all the time, I've got one that's never been played before. Did you say that, Yoshi? Yeah, we've definitely played Matthew McConaughey before. But that's okay, because it's a new group, and we'll see how far we can go. Starting with Shawnee.

Dazed and confused. Yeah, might as well bang that one out. Might as well get it out of there, Mark. Yeah. Nate? Dallas Buyers Club. Mm-hmm. Might as well get it out of there, Mark. Yeah. Nate? Dallas Buyers Club. I'll go with... Tropic Thunder.

So good. Did they not get the TiVo? Huh? No. Don't forget, you guys, you have a lifeline. You can use it any time. But, Ross, what do you have? Failure to launch.

I don't need to hear about your love life, Ross. It's a good movie. Doug, I've got three kids. If anything, I'm excessively launching. Ew. Gross. Put that in your Tinder profile. Don't show that movie to your kids.

If you want to, you can use that for an album title, Doug. That's fine. Excessively launching. Excessive launching? Well, but a man and a woman love each other very much. Okay. Mark? The Wolf of Wall Street.

Okay. Yeah. You're welcome. Goes on for like three minutes in the movie. That was like the short version. That's like his actual warm-up, right? Like, doesn't he do that? Well, Lincoln lawyer.

Oh, maybe? Like, as an actor, he just sits in the corner going, That's what he said. Oh, I broke my own sunglasses. That scene is him like doing his actual like what he does to psych himself out before he acts or whatever oh and so Scorsese saw him doing that and said let's just put it in the movie I don't know I think he might have just done it

like he just said like wing it or whatever and then he just why when they say cut he's just sitting there fucking pounding on himself for forever and then he goes at the end that's my favorite part if anybody knows the answer to that it it's got to be Mark Wahlberg. I have no idea. There's nothing wrong with saying a couple words to yourself before you get ready to do a line.

The Lincoln lawyer. Did you have a line for us today, Mark? Fucking A, I do. You want to do a fucking line? Oh, shit. Look good, feel good. You look good. You feel good. Every party needs a pooper.

That's why we invited you. Every party needs a pooper. That's why we invited you. Every party needs a pooper. That's why we invited you. Adventures in babysitting. No. Every party needs a pooper. That's why we invited you. Can't hardly wait.

No. How many people? Raise your hand if you fucking know it. That's like an expression that people just use. No. You ready for the full title? It was an expression before it was in the movie. Here we go. Ready?

Do a full line. Every party needs a pooper. That's why we invited you, George Banks. Every party needs a pooper. That's why we invited you, George Banks. Is that really where that expression came from? Every party needs a pooper. It's a

wonderful life. That's why we invited you, George Banks. Let me hear it if you already know what it fucking is. There are seven people who know it. You guys should be ashamed of yourselves. I don't know who George Banks is. Saving Mr. Banks? The Help. Okay, you want another one?

Yeah. We are not hiring Fronk. We are hiring Fronk. No, we are not hiring Fronk. People know it. People are hiring Frank. No, we are not hiring Frank. People know it. People are into it. You want another one? Yeah.

Ever since she was a little girl, I knew that this day would come. Are you fucking yelling at things out right now? It's almost like you didn't hear him when he freaked out earlier. There is an empty table here. Go sit at it Then leave I'm joking You don't have to fucking do that Is it Father of the Bride?

It is Father of the Bride Why would anyone remember Any lines from that? Because it's so good Why did you know it? Because it's so fucking good I guess Frog is Martin Short It is Martin Short

Okay One point for Doug Let's go on to another game Because it's so fucking... I guess Frog is Martin Short? It is Martin Short. Okay. One point for Doug. Let's go on to another game. Welcome back to Movies Love Mark. All right. What did you say, Sean? The Lincoln lawyer?

Uh-huh, uh-huh. Okay. Go ahead there, Nate. Since we're in Florida, let's go Magic Mike. Magic Mike, all right. I'm glad I saw the sequel. A time to kill Here in Florida We're the only way to get to space

Contact That was an answer And a brochure Did I not mention I got a lot of brochures in the prize bag, too? To be honest, dude, I love a good brochure. Have you been to the Slingshot right up the road? It's fucking awesome.

I'm going to go. Your fucking bong looks like it's a Cape Canaveral model. Yes, it does. I'm with NASA, and I can confirm that. Here's what we do. Is it Father the Bride 2? And this thing is not going to SpaceX on you either. That's a solid piece right there.

That was another local reference. Well, I mean, I feel like the exploding rocket ship was reported nationally, but okay. Yeah. Nobody got hurt, right? No, I think, yeah, that was one of the one blessings. Nobody got hurt. Okay, good.

Ha! What'd you say? Nobody got hurt, right? No, I think, yeah, that was one of the one blessings. Nobody got hurt. Okay, good. Hooray! Ha! What'd you say? Hooray? Yeah, it is good. Huzzah! Yippee! I was like, Matthew McConaughey was in a movie called Hooray?

Sounds like it. All right, since we're already talking about space and contact and whatnot. Wait. What happened? Whose turn is it? Mark's turn, right? Yeah. Oh, sorry.

That's all right. Most people assume I already got it right. I'm going to answer. Sahara. I'll roll deep, motherfucker. What's that face flying around out there? It's me It's Matthew McConaughey's face on a stick Oh

That's not as good That's a better looking Why were you waving it around now? Like you were waving it like you wanted me to notice Or did you just want Mark to notice? Or did you want us to hit it with a donut? I'll nail it. I'll hit that thing right in the middle of its forehead.

Guys, if you hit a mask of me, that'll be the closest I've ever come to eating a donut. Oh. These are fucking gross. Watch your back. These are like hella slimy, so watch out. I mean, I'm going to throw it out into the crowd, but watch out. Where's Mark at?

I'm right next to him. Well, that light doesn't help. There it is. Put the light down. I'm sorry in advance. Yeah, it's fine just like that. Oh, wait. What was that other light? They brought it around. No, not that. Oh, that's not bad. I'm going to hit the light with a help. There it is. Put the light down. I'm sorry in advance. Yeah, it's fine just like that. Oh, wait. What was that other light?

They brought it around. No, not that. Oh, that's not bad. I'm going to hit the light with a donut. Okay. Sorry, I told you it was gross, man. Or a woman. Oh.

All right, who's having a cheat day? Yeah! Did we get it? All right, who's having a cheat day? Yeah! Did we get it? All right. If I hit this, it'll be the greatest fucking moment of your life. Is there like a box under his face now? There's always a box under my face. What? What? What? What? What?

Now listen, if I don't hit it, it's because I didn't want to. You guys do this with this fucking bracelet on. Nope. Oh, you hit a woman in the face She asked for it Mark Who's got an extra napkin? You should go back to basketball

And write it in your diary That's a good one Right? Yes Okay What animal brought glazed donuts? You know that people work here And have to clean that up, right?

You fucking beast. People caught them in their mouths and they're eating them. It's fine. One girl pulled her tank top out and was like, here. I worked at a comedy club where somebody pissed and threw up in the corner inside of it, so people have to clean up worse shit at a club than donuts. You know what I mean? Is it my turn?

I said Sahara. Oh, yeah, Sahara. Interstellar. As long as we were out in space. Yes, that's the one I was going to say, but I'm glad I didn't. I mean, I'm not glad. Took it. Interstellar.

All right, Nate. Don't forget about your lifeline. Don't make any mistakes without using a lifeline. We are Marshall. Ooh. Oh. That's a feel good. In the end, feel good.

It's kind of a bumpy ride, to be honest. It was a good movie. I liked that movie. Fool's gold. I think I got one, but I'm not 100%. Joe, what do you have? You might want to use your life. What do you have, Joe?

Joe. What's up? Oh, yeah, good one, Joe. Joe says Bernie. You want to go with Bernie? I will say Bernie, Doug. No, that's incorrect. Goddammit, Joe!

I'm just kidding. He's in Bernie. With Jack Black. It's really good. It's in Bernie. With Jack Black. It's really good. It's a Richard Linklater joint. I liked it. Mark? How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days.

Yeah. Total classic. Frailty. Frailty. Damn. Nate? No. frailty frailty to him Nate no thank you I'm gonna use my life you said it to me quietly before using your lifeline does true detective oh yeah nice mud yeah you're Oh, yeah, nice. Mud. Yeah, mud. Thank you. You're a true detective.

Alright, I'm gonna go with Ghosts of Girlfriends Past. Classic. All these fucking classics this guy was in. It's like he's a movie star or some shit. Got his own Criterion collection Has anyone said Am I next? What women want?

You're wrong Incorrect You're mixing up your hunky actors Your man stalled out Joe I hope you have a good shithead on the back of that thing I hope you didn't have your eye on that bong And if whoever wins today is not a pot smoker I hope you have a good shithead on the back of that thing. I hope you didn't have your eye on that bong. And if whoever wins today is not a pot smoker,

they should probably pass that on to somebody else. Because it's a pretty nice item. I guess you could just take it home and treat it like a trophy. Mark? Breakfast. Hit me up. The wedding planner. The wedding planner good work breakfast way to go B

B coming in with the wedding P turn your phone up that better be Jesus it was me calling my lifeline to thank him. That's the most important thing you've got to do with your phone, is make sure that when it's inside a purse or the bottom of a purse or a bag, make sure you leave it on, because it's fun to try to get to it quickly when it goes off.

John, what do you got got angels in the outfield never what I never would have yeah I would never ever ever what I've got that's really cool deep hole yeah that was really good that was such a deep That pull was so deep Oh god That deep pull is ready to go Jack What do you got Nate? Anything? Tapping out?

Toy story That's right He's the voice of the sarcastic Mr. Potato Head. I knew that. Get out of here, you hockey puck. Nice try, Nate. It's never a bad guess to name an animated movie that he might have been a voice in,

but in this case, it is incorrect. Can I say those Cadillac commercials? Mm-mm. Nope. but in this case it is incorrect. Can I say those Cadillac commercials? Mm-mm. Nope. Because those commercials make me mad because he's like pretending to discuss with the dogs where he's going to take them to eat and then when they express an opinion,

he's like, nope, we're going where I want to go because I'm a person. Like, it's fucked up. The one with the buffalo I loved. That's a good one. All right. Better than a lot with the buffalo, I loved. That's a good one. All right. Better than a lot of the movies I've seen. I'm going to go with Killer Joe.

Motherfucker. Oh, shit. McConaughey. We're plumbing the depths of McConaughey here. Holy shit. There's got to be something we're really plumbing the depths of McConaughey here holy shit it's got to be something we're missing anything mark or back here oh are we I don't know where we are. Yeah, right? Are you out? Oh, yes.

Oh, yeah, Ross is out. All right. Ross apparently used something from his gift bag before arriving today. Wait, you brought a gift bag? Don't look a gift bag in the mouth. Nothing, Mark? No, I have one, but I was trying to think of the title. You just don't want to say it yet? I think I heard somebody say it, and I don't fucking cheat at anything because I don't need to.

So I'm going to say a movie that I think already premiered at the Toronto Film Festival. Gold. Gold? Yeah. And he's in it? That's his next fucking movie. I think it just came out at Toronto International Film Festival.

It was played at TIFF? I don't know her personally, but... But you know Breakfast. I know Tape. I don't know. I don't know how to call this because it seems unfair to name a movie that's not out yet.

Wide released? It's not out at all yet. Do you want me to be honest? It just had a premiere at a festival. Say the one I was thinking of that I also think I heard. And you can decide. Oh yeah, that's not out yet. Wide released? It's not out at all yet. Do you want me to be honest? It just had a premiere at a festival. Say the one I was thinking of that I also think I heard and you can decide. Oh yeah, that's fair.

Peacemaker. What's that? That's the one I was trying to think of and I thought I heard somebody say it and I thought I can't say it now.

That's a movie that's already been out? I don't know. Christmas. So you've got two movies that aren't out yet. It's hard for me because I've turned down

all these fucking movies. So I can't remember when they came out. All right, I will let a normal person win. Sean, do you have another one? Did Mississippi Burning?

Is he in that? No. Am I out of my mind? Sorry. Yeah, he's four and a half. He's the paper boy. Yeah, Matthew McConaughey was the paper boy in Mississippi burning.

Oh, you didn't know? Well, finally, I do know something. I'm out. Is that real? No. I sold it. Nate, if Nate doesn't get it. That was great fucking confidence right there, dude.

Thank you, Doc. Fuck yeah. Whoa, that is heavy. Jesus. That was great fucking confidence right there, dude. Fuck yeah. Whoa, that is heavy. Jesus.

They just bumped fists, everybody listening. So, Sean, you were the last person to get one right then, right? Other than me, of course. Yeah, I was, actually. Yeah. All right. So, Sean's our winner, everybody. Boom.

Yes. What did we miss? Ed TV. Surfer Dude. Was he in Pelican Brief? No. Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Reign of Fire. Part 2, yeah.

State of Jones. Dragon movie. State of Jones. That was out this summer. He's in fucking Kubo? Kubo with the two strings? That Kubo? Shit, if you're going to blink, do it now. We said that one. Oh my god.

Dazed and confused. That was the first one you said. Contact. U571. Beethoven second. Honey, we shrunk ourselves. Yeah, we ran the fire. Somebody already said.

Damn, he's good in Rain of Fire. Tiptoes? He's in Tiptoes? I've never seen it. That's that crazy-ass Gary Oldman as a weird little deformed guy movie. I said Tropic Thunder. Mark, when you and McConaughey get in the same room, is that too much ego?

We said Free State of Jones. Don't you fucking say Painting Game. What? Somebody out there try to say fucking Painting Game. Amistad He just stumbled onto the set and they kept him in Like alright We'll keep you in What are you talking about Sean

Stumbled into what I didn't know was he really in Amistad He's the white guy in Amistad He frees the slaves Just like Brad Pitt does in 12 Years a Slave. There's always one white guy who frees everybody. That's how history works. History's when somebody makes a movie and makes it look like one white guy was the hero. The Stephen Biko movie was all about his white friend.

Look it up. Book it up. Fucking look it up. was the hero. The Stephen Biko movie was all about his white friend. Look it up. Book it up. Fucking look it up. Cry freedom, bitches. All right. So Sean won, so let's give the prizes to...

John. John flew over the cuckoo's nest. Nate Craig, you asked me a question about being in the same room as McConaughey. Yeah, how's that go? There's two things that happen. First, he says it's an honor. I say I know.

Then the second thing that happened is we take turns bench-pesting each other. Who can bench you more? Oh, yeah, you gotta get all this stuff, too. Is that rhetorical? Okay, he's bringing it to you. Who can bench more, you or Matt? That's a rhetorical question.

You guys have nicknames for each other? Alright, you know I'm wrapping it up, right? I do. I do now. Now I know. Alright, pass me those other name tags so we can do some shitheads at the end, and we'll start with Ross over there. What do you got to plug? Promote yourself,

Ross. Well, thankfully, we found a smoker for the Diesel Glass pieces I brought. DieselGlassInc.com. Me, personally, I was telling you, Doug, I'm a local comic. I don't go anywhere. First and third Saturday, Bull and Bush in the Milk District. We've got a great show called Shit Sandwich. These guys have seen it.

The 12th of September, I'm hosting Other Bar downtown. That's on Wall Street. And then next Wednesday, or maybe two Wednesdays from now, the 21st of September, my show called Tumbleweed is going to do a show right outside of here in the Fatfish Blue Bar. 21st of September, check that out. Tumbleweed at Tomoka Brewing in Port Orange on the 24th. 25th, Shady Brunch at Will's Pub.

That's a brunch show. You get a free... Okay, you have four more minutes. Perfect, because I got traffic after that. Check out... Welcome to Ross Loves Lists. If you guys are local and you love comedy, check out OrlandoIndieComedy.com.

We do a festival. This will be the third year in January. Go check it out. The Orlando Indie Comedy Fest is going to be fucking awesome. We had Eddie Papatone headlining last year. Sean Patton headlining last year. Doug, they're looking for a headliner. Help me out. And check out all that stuff at tumbleweedcomedy.com.

Thanks again, Veterans Coffee, Diesel Glass, and Marlin and Barrel for the prizes. There you go. Ross McCoy, local legend. Breakfast, your name tag has a thing that looks like it used to say someone is a shithead, but it's torn off. She had some regret, I think. Where is breakfast?

Right straight back. What was it supposed to say? Did you tear it off on purpose? Okay. That works. That's fair. Yeah, their breakfast is no good. Alright. That is not a thing you should know.

When does Deepwater Horizon come out, Mark? Comes out September 30th. You can also go to Wahlburgers if you like yourself. It's great food. Breakfast, I'm sorry we didn't win, but I will still sign your tit. Other than that... There's only got one?

Other than that, look out for Patriot's Day. It's actually going to be a great movie, and I hope everybody enjoys it. Oh, also, one last thing. How could I? You're welcome. Sean Jordan, our big winner, can you come back to the show Monday night in Los Angeles?

Are you going back to L.A.? I'll be in Los Angeles. Let's have you back show Monday night in Los Angeles? Are you going back to LA? I'll be in Los Angeles. Let's have you back on Monday night. 3P? It's going to be a good one too. They've got a couple of goodies. Tough competitors. They're going to take you down. That's my prediction.

Mark, you want to come with? No, I'm kidding. I don't need you there. Doug, you want me to come and see how Orlando references do out there? They're going to kill him. I'm going to bring him in. I know the Tilikum will do better out there. It's a little too close when you say it here.

Do you mean Tathilicum? Flathilibum? Sean, what do you got to plug? I'm going to be on Doug Lowe's movies on Monday in Los Angeles. Where are we doing that one? Nerdist? Nope. Well, yeah, sort of.

Meltdown Comics, yeah. Meltdown Comics? Sorry. Nerdist HQ. Sean Cougar Mellon Jordan on Instagram, Sean S. Jordan on Twitter, and Sean Jordan Comedy. Thank you, Sean Jordan.

What are you, you looking your shit up there, Nate? Yeah, I didn't check my dates before this, but I'm NateCraigLive on Twitter and Instagram. And if NateCraig's here, I'll buy that handle from you. Why? But yeah, I have two albums online, Infinity and Eggshell.

And if you're in Omaha, Nebraska on October 1st, I'll be with Bill Burr at the Orpheum. How'd you come up with your Twitter name? Oh, it was something a guy was giving me CPR and he was yelling it. Nate Craig, live! Nate Craig, when you die, the memorial tweets are going to be super ironic.

You're not going to die. Don't let him get near you. It's okay. Now I want to die for that to happen and for you to feel really fucking awful. That finger's almost pointing at Mark. You better watch your back, dog. Mark never feels awful. I'm going to be at the...

Correct. I'm going to be at the improv in Houston for a special Friday happy hour Douglas Movies taping on September 30th. Same day Deepwater Horizon opens. We can make a whole day of it, because I think that it'll be playing at the Multiplex in the same mall as the Improv.

So let's have some comedy, and then maybe eat at Fat Fish Blue, because I think they have one of those too. And then we'll see Deepwater. We'll see DWH. I don't know if you'll want seafood after that film, Doug. That's why I said it in the other order. I don't know if you'll want seafood after that film, Doug. That's why I said it in the other order. I'm going to eat the seafood

and then I'm going to watch Deepwater Horizon. Douglovesmovies.com for all my info. And thanks once again to all of my guests. Ross McCoy, Mark Wahlberg, Sean Jordan, Nate Craig.

Live! Thank you, nice people of Orlando. Apologies to my biggest fan in the world for how I treated her today. And as always, you guys can just stay in one spot. You don't have to move around just wrapping it up right there is good you're like the most casual security guard ever

you like throw people out for wearing backwards hats and hoodies while wearing a backwards hat and a hoodie and as always the Wendy's girl is a shithead. I don't even know if they have a Wendy's girl anymore. I haven't seen her in a minute. Scumbags are shitheads.

It's pretty obvious, right? And my drug dealer's time management skills are shit.