Doug Loves Movies - Ngaio Bealum, Jacob Sirof and Brian Malow guest

Episode Date: December 6, 2015

Live from Goodnights Comedy Club in Raleigh, NC, Doug welcomes Ngaio Bealum, Jacob Sirof and Brian Malow to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey everybody this episode is brought to you by Loot Crate. Would you classify yourself as a geek gamer or pop culture nerd? Then this is the subscription box for you. For less than 20 bucks a month you get six to eight items of gamer and pop culture licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one-of-a-kind items and more. Make sure to head to LootCrate.com slash Doug and enter code Doug to save $3 off any new subscription. Not that long ago, and depending on where you live, not so far

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that's it, it's over. So when the cutoff happens, that's it. It's over. So go to lootcrate.com slash Doug and enter the code Doug to save $3 on your new subscription today. Enjoy the show. Doug hates candy wrappers screaming baby sticky seats with 50 ads and popcorn kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies. My name is Doug and I love movies. And here's our love for movies.

Coming to you for the first time from Good Nights Comedy Club in Raleigh, North Carolina! Yeah! It's Saturday, December 5th, 2015, at 420-ish. And, sir, may I apologize to you? Oh. What was... Why did it sound like somebody dropped a microphone? Ha! It was a ghost mic drop, you guys.

A dead comedian just did a mic drop on my ass. This club's been here for a while. There's been a lot of dead comics that perform here. I was trying to apologize to the gentleman who has the worst seat in the house, because my dumb table's going to block your view of all of my guests, but I'll try to keep it tight for you. Which is not something I like to say to a man or a woman now that I think about it. I don't have to keep shit tight at all. My business can be loose.

Did I say it's 420-ish? We always start 10 minutes late because I have to be out on the back stairs in an important meeting at 420. Let me see your name tags, Raleigh. I know you guys came prepared. Oh, my God. I love the Christine, Christina poster

where you actually put the headlights on Christine and change it to Christina. That's pretty sweet. Somebody's shining a light on a Goonies poster. Is that a Goonies poster? And what'd you change it to? The Mattys? Because your name is Matt?

That's a much better name than Goon. I must admit. Jurassic Parker? Your name's Parker? Your first name? Is your last name Lewis? Oh, because I was going to say, if it was, you can't lose. Geradio?

What is that? It was Radio. And you changed it to Jared-io. And you put your face on radio's face and then me and Jeff Tate are just hanging out at the top? Okay, a night at the Rossbury, you put my head on there in a way that when you shake your poster, my head shakes like I'm dancing. that when you shake your poster, my head shakes like I'm dancing. Too bad that song isn't available.

That annoying song from that. Do you have it on your phone? Oh my God, he does. Baby, don't hurt me. What's the name of that song instead of that dumb song? What is love? And who's the artist? Hadaway?

All right, black guy, settle down. You're the one And uh You've confirmed that it's Hathaway But what color was Hathaway? Is that a Is a black person? Okay Fair enough then

We'll turn to you For all of our black questions Great job, everybody. I'm sorry you're still holding them up. Somebody brought a Shamu that says Free Willy on it. That's fun. It's inflatable, so if that gets up here, I'm definitely going to pop it.

I'm going to crush it and pop it. Time for Doug's Plugs. Getting Doug with High goes live this Monday, December 7th at 7.15 Pacific. That's 10.15 PM for you guys. If you go to youtube.com

slash Doug Benson, got three great guests on that one. Schedule's permitting, of course. Let's look in the prize bag. I brought some stuff for you guys. Hello, my name is Doug Lowe's Movie Sticker. So that some stuff for you guys. Hello, my name is Doug Lowe's Movies

sticker. So that's fun if you go to a high school reunion or a work convention. A Doug Lowe's Movies t-shirt, which is also fun to wear to things. That's what I recommend you do with it. Oh, here's one of these slappy things for

it says the end of the street on it. A slappy wristband thing. Recent guest on Douglas Movie's 12 Guests of Christmas, Greg Wyshynski gave me a copy of his book, Take Your Eye Off the Puck, How to Watch Hockey by Knowing Where to Look. And...

I'm checking now to see if he signed it to me because that would be terrible if it was personalized and I gave it away. That would just be rude. Oh yeah, he did. He wrote... He wrote, DB, keep this in case you ever need

to communicate with the Canadian and or need 250 rolling papers. Alright, so that's a book signed to me that I'm giving to somebody today. I can get another one from him. And what else do we got here? Oh, we got a couple of buttons. A dude here

gave me a button that's basically, it's just the shape of North Carolina on a button. I don't even know which way's... I don't know which side is up. Now I do. It looks like Tennessee the other way. And then also, this is a fun button I found when I was moving recently. Remember that movie Sid and Nancy? Yes, a Sid and Nancy button is also going in the bag, which is perfect for the people that have a lot of flair.

Like Jeff Tate would definitely wear that, but I'm giving it away to somebody today. And my guests all brought stuff too, so let's get them out here and see what they have. Please give a big warm welcome to Brian Mallow, Jacob Seroff, and Ungayo Bilem! Syroff and Nguyen Belem. Standing ovation, you guys.

That was very nice. Yeah, super nice. I kind of have a boner right now. Directly to my right, first-time guests on the show, so be gentle, everybody. It's Brian Mallow is here. Brian Mallow is here. I met all three of these dudes

in comedy clubs in San Francisco many more years ago than I care to admit. But now Brian, what? We didn't meet in San Francisco. Where did we meet? We met at the Dallas Improv a million years ago. I was opening and you were middling, and who knows who was headlining.

When you say I was middling, that just sounds like my act was just fair. Fair to middling, and who knows who was headlining. When you say I was middling, that just sounds like my act was just fair. Fair to middling. But yeah, I was the feature act, the middle act, and then I forget who the headliner was. I have no idea. Dallas Improv. Maybe Greg?

Because you know what? Was it Greg someone? Does anyone know? I've worked with Greg. He's great. I think they put the headliner in a separate condo

and the opener and feature act had a condo together so I think we shared a condo. We even shared accommodations and I don't remember that. Well nothing that memorable

happened. Alright. But then we hung out in San Francisco for sure because that's where you were based at the time. And now you live here in Raleigh. In Raleigh, not far from here. That's pretty awesome. Pretty sweet place to live.

They yelled the shit out of Donald Trump yesterday. I was very happy about that. yesterday I was very very happy about that and what do you what's your gig here in town because I think people will find this fascinating so the thing is I I was always kind of a geeky comedian and eventually I found that I should call it science comedy and science comedian calm and I'm at science great Travis was a great Travis so you're on Twitter your science comedian comedian on Twitter and YouTube and that led to other science communications up so I made science videos for Time magazine and I've done a bunch of audio pieces for Neil deGrasse Tyson's radio show,

StarTalk Radio. It's very cool. I'm happy for you. And so science comedy. Thanks. No, it sounds super fun. I mean, you know, we find our niches. You know, you found science.

I found marijuana. And movies, of course. They go hand in hand. But those are two great tastes. They taste great together. And speaking of people who like marijuana and movies, also on the panel today, Jacob Siroff is here, you guys.

Thanks, Wally. Resplendent in his Christmassy Star Wars Stormtrooper sweater vest thingy. It's the season. Yeah. Literally. It's the season for Christmas and Star Wars. I think Star Wars is kind of replacing Christmas this year, I feel like.

Wouldn't it be great if there were no Christmas commercials or songs? It was all just... You're asking me if that would be great? Yes. Have yourself a Jedi little Christmas. And that's N'Gayo Belem on the mouth harp.

Raising the population of black people in this room to two! Is that something to be proud of, you guys? Are you proud of that? Well, they're happy that you're here. Oh, I'm happy to be here, too. And let me say, the weed in Raleigh is pretty fucking good. Right?

Well done. Well done. Most of it's from California, but I'm glad you brought it out here. It's great. Can I get my prizes? I'm holding you brought it out here. It's great. Can I get my prizes? I'm holding all this shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I didn't mean to make you so uncomfortable with all that stuff. Yeah, I know. I brought a bunch of stuff. Are you giving away that Diet Coke? Yes, I am giving away that Diet Coke, as a matter of fact. But the way you have a Diet Coke and a beer, it looks like you're just ripping off Neil Hamburger's act when he's always got three drinks in his hands.

Could you help me pass the Coke over? That's the first thing you should probably go. They give that away in the hotel room. I don't believe in wasting stuff. He's got a bottle of Diet Coke. That's the first thing. I like regular Coke, but knock yourself out.

I got this cup here. This is an electric dynamite mug. That's Jack Black's production company. I got that meeting with someone that he knows. That's a nice little mug. It's almost like a little soup mug. Yeah. Is it good for clinging against the jail bars?

I also have... Didn't it look like that kind of It's a podcast They couldn't There was an act out That was funny Theater of the mind sir Also my other obsession

Besides Star Wars That people know me Is boxing So I never travel Without vintage copies Of the Ring Magazine So there's one from February 2014 The Ring Magazine

Yeah you always Gotta have a vintage copy Of the Ring Magazine There's a t-shirt that the sound guy made it's kind of crappy but no offense sound guy but you know you're giving him out so it's not like you wait he gave you this just now turn around and give it away yeah who would do something I told him I was gonna do that like a signed book I understand him I was going to do that. Like a signed book, I understand. It's not really crappy. His name's Steve. He makes these. He's a local comic support. It's like,

it doesn't really, you can't tell what it's about, but it's, it says laugh local. It says laugh local, but I mean, I don't know that,

yeah. So do the, okay, that's something. Also, my final piece, this is a very personal item for me.

This is when I went to, a year ago, I went to some sex addict anonymous meetings. So this is my welcome. I realized I wasn't a sex addict. I'm just like, I'm just an enthusiast, I think to some sex addict anonymous meetings. So this is my welcome. I realize I wasn't a sex addict. I'm just an enthusiast, I think.

But hey, whoever wins, if you're a sex addict, you've got a head start here. But you decided that you weren't an addict yourself. It's not like they say, you know what, buddy? You seem more like an enthusiast. Thanks for coming. You can have some coffee on your way out.

I pulled myself out of the game, yeah. All right, good for you, man. Thanks for coming. You can have some coffee on your way out. I pulled myself out of the game. Yeah. Alright. Good for you, man. I pulled out. Alright, so N'Gayo, what did you Oh, I have a DVD, the 420 Friendly Comedy Special with me and Keith Olgenson

and Jasper Redd and Dan Gabriel. It's very funny. There's jokes on there. Not even always jokes about weed. And you can buy it online as well for all you people in podcast line. It's got special features. You can watch it in widescreen if you want. That's right.

You can get stoned and watch it. You have to provide the widescreen. Yeah. The DVD does not provide the... No. You know, it's nice to have a science guy around. Just wanted to make that part clear. And what'd you break for the bag?

Science comedian. I got two things. The first thing is a genuine, original Marvel Thor The Dark World wristband, still in its original packaging. Wow, you didn't... That's right. You resisted the urge to take it out and play with it? I'm sorry. I've been hanging on to this.

When did it come out? Anyone? Oh, it's been a while. I've been hanging on to it for just this special moment. So that's the first thing. But try to remember during the show to not ask the audience questions because they will answer,

and then I'll get mad at them. All right. And then the second thing is questions because they will answer and then I'll get mad at them. Alright. And then the second thing is the Will World DVD, Land of the Lost. Oh! I thought that was a little underrated. It had some funny parts. It had some parts. I wouldn't laugh out loud funny

according to the Minneapolis Star Tribune. That's how deep they had to go for a quote. All the way to Minneapolis. Star Tribune. That's how deep they had to go for a quote. All the way to Minneapolis. Minneapolis, yeah. From the Cary Herald. The John Buck Road. Or is it Buck Jones?

I didn't even realize. Land of the Lost has the science connection too through a wormhole or something. Yeah, is the science sound in Land of the Lost? Absolutely. It's based on a true story. All right, well, all of that is in the bag. Oh, it turns out it's heavy.

That's mainly the Diet Coke. Someone's going to win all that crap. And good luck to everybody. But first we have to talk a little bit about movies because that's part of the show. Start with Ungayo. Have you been to the cinema lately

or watched something on your personal devices? I have been to the cinema, sir. I just saw the legend. The Tom Hardy is the Kray Brothers gangsters from the 60s. Ooh, none of us have seen that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm here to talk about it. How'd that work out for you?

I thought Tom Hardy was great, and it's kind of like Goodfellas meets Of Mice and Men in some sort of weird... Yeah, because the brothers are like, one of them's just doing the wrong thing all the time, and the other one has to try to keep him in line. Kind of.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And the soundtrack was great and the outfits are all fucking posh. How about... London in the Swinging Sixties.

It's Lenny and George in Of Mice and Men, right? Yes. And Lenny's the big one? Yes, but no rabbits. Yeah, yeah. And he's like, tell me about the rabbits, George.

And then his name's Lenny. Thank you for recapping the whole... Welcome to Doug Love's Cliff Notes. I'm just saying, I'm rewriting your description of legend to, it's mice and men if Lenny was a homosexual.

Paranoid, schizophrenic, violent homosexual. Yeah, okay. Well, he's violent. Lenny's violent in the original I do remember that He does kill things without necessarily meaning to So is it like gerbils instead of bunnies? No, there's no gerbils Why gerbils, Mr. Sex Addict?

I don't know It's an old 80s joke What about you, Jacob? We saw a movie today, together, in fact. We got high and watched Our Brand is Crisis. I watched a bunch of movies this week. We saw Krampus, too. We saw Krampus, yes.

Please don't even say the words Krampus, too. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Yeah, it was basically like Gremlins if it sucked. Yeah, and just somehow a little less edgy than Gremlins, which is strange, because

Gremlins is pretty cutesy. I thought it was more edgy. Well, I don't want to spoil the movie. Don't spoil it too much, yeah. But what were you going to say? The more people get killed in the movie than in Gremlins. There's a lot of death in the movie. Yeah, yeah.

Well, yeah, the Gremlins just cause a lot of miscellaneous mayhem. Gentle pranks. Yeah, well, it's pretty mean, a lot of it. But just the Gremlins had that dark, it goes darker story-wise than Krampus because it's got that whole segment where Phoebe Cates is talking about how her dad was dressed up as Santa and died in the chimney. And that's why she hates Christmas.

As reasons to hate Christmas go, that's the best one. That's the best one ever written. But this one's a lot of... It's all children that are being murdered in this one, which is kind of an interesting... Kind of neat. For a PG-13 movie, yeah. It kind of reminded me of, I thought of Willy Wonka,

the first Willy Wonka in the chocolate factory when one of the fat kids died. I was like, oh, that's just like Augustus Gloop. But, uh... How often do you get to say that? Just like Augustus Gloop You don't get to say it often enough People don't get stuck in tubes full of chocolate Often enough

The suspense is horrible What did you think of our brand is crisis, Jacob? I know you told me already I liked it Thumbs up on our brand is crisis I expected nothing out of it It was pretty good It had like half the Rotten Tomatoes score of Krampus.

Which didn't make a lot of sense to me. Did anyone here see Our Brandish Crisis? Has anyone heard of it? Sandra Bullock. It's a movie with Sandra Bullock. It's in South America. You're such a fast talker. Did anybody here see Our Brandish Crisis?

Does anybody here even know what he's saying? It is a terrible title. It's a bad title. Our brand is weed here, so that's my cop-out for this. Speaking of that, you can buy my marijuana at naturalcannabis.com. You're selling weed? You're actually selling weed on the show? In California.

I'm not selling weed in North Carolina. I'm selling DVDs that happen to come with me. But you'll ship it to North Carolina? No. Hey, snitch. God, dog. No, come to California and smoke my weed. That's my point. You can stay at my house.

I didn't mean to crampus your style. Sorry. Good night Yep You're eliminated I like the elimination style Brian Mallow What was the last movie You saw

And I hope it has Something to do with science Yeah So I've seen a couple Things recently One thing that I guess Maybe this doesn't Quite qualify Ryan Mallow, what was the last movie you saw? And I hope it has something to do with science. Yeah, so I've seen a couple things recently. One thing that I guess maybe this doesn't quite qualify, but I've been really enjoying The Man in the High Castle on Amazon Prime. It's a miniseries based on a book by Philip K. Dick, and I have a kind of obsessive relationship to him.

So that's fantastic. I recently saw Inside Out, but what I really liked, it was actually kind of good. What was that reaction? It was, it's a Pixar film. Was everybody like, ew, you're an adult. What's wrong with you? Or were you like, ew, because it's so sad. I heard, aw.

I thought it was like, aw. It was so cute. Lewis Black, Bill Hader, Amy Poehler, but The Martian, I finally saw in 3D and really liked it. I love 3D when it's done well, and it was done well, and I loved it. Did you see it? It totally looked like he was on Mars.

You could... I was like, if this was just projected onto a flat screen, I'd be like, that's not Mars. But I guess the one thing that was odd to me... Isn't there bad science in that? Well, I don't know He figures out a way to plant Oh, okay, so, yeah Do they explain it sufficiently?

Maybe, maybe not I don't know how possible that Like, whether you can do that But what got me was the fact that he was a botanist Like, why did they make him a botanist? Because I'm not gonna This isn't really spoilery But I didn't know he was a botanist. Like, why did they make him a botanist? Because I'm not going to, this isn't really spoilery, but he demonstrated amazing knowledge

of electrical engineering and physics and aerospace and all that, and he grew some potatoes. Okay, couldn't you have made him a genius aerospace engineer who just knew how to grow a damn potato? Like, that would have been more believable. Was he Irish or something?

Maybe there was a reason. He was just Matt Damon. He's like the Buckaroo Bonsai. Matt Damon, botanist on Mars. But it was fun. It was cool. It was a good visual treat. Yeah, I guess the visuals are good. I just thought it was boring.

We saw our brand as Crisis in 3D. It was also well done, I thought. This show is in 3D. That llama comes right at you before getting hit by a car. Three doobies? Huh? Nothing.

What? How many times? Yeah, so that's my last movie. But before I watched the movie with Jacob this morning in my hotel room, I watched Bicentennial Man. Oh! Yeah, I had never seen that because I assumed I would not like it. And I got to tell you, two hours and 11 minutes,

that's a long stretch of road, that movie. Like, there's one point where they go, 16 years later, and I'm like, what? And then I realize, oh, it's Bicentennial Man. The story has to take place over 200 years. So 16 is not a big enough jump. Let's go. Slide some oil to that robot and get him moving.

Because also, it was funny to just see a robot movie, because Robin Williams totally commits to the part. I mean, he was a great actor, and he commits to it, but it's just, it's so silly. The robot that wants to become a real man, and everybody argues with about it, like, eventually goes,

yeah, you got a good point there. You should be a real man. Like, he convinces everybody. It's like, no, you got a good point there. You should be a real man. Like he convinces everybody. It's like, no, you're a fucking robot, man. You'll never be real to me. No matter if you get a working genitalia or not. And he does. You're going to get a lot of robots rights advocates writing in. Right.

You're going to get a lot of emails. Yeah. That movie's biased against to get a lot of emails. Yeah. That movie's biased against robots who want to be people. I don't know how that... You guys are all thinking about it. Well, robots should be people if they want to be. Yeah, I don't know. I don't think that movie did very well.

I don't believe. I don't think so. But for years, I've also confused it with Renaissance Man, which is like Mark Wahlberg's screen debut he's got a part in there that was like one of the troops or something and uh that's being experimented on is that about our experiments on troops i think with danny devito and so i always confuse those two movies so today i was watching bicentennial man the entire time going when's when's mark walberg gonna turn up it's his film debut. When's he going to show up

and say something mean to the robot? How you doing? You like being a robot? So that was my morning catching up on an oldie but a not very goodie. And yeah, Oliver Platt's in it. He's always good.

Oliver Platt always makes everything better. Right? He's the Michael McDonald. Or the Nate Dog. I'm sorry. I had to get my generations right. He's the Nate Dog. He shows up on your hook.

You're like, oh, that's a hit. Shit, hey. What was the Michael McDonald thing? Like he's the Nate dog. He shows up on your hook. You're like, oh, that's a hit. Shit, hey. What was the Michael McDonald thing? Like, he's the best Doobie brother or something? No, Michael McDonald shows up on all

your 80s hits, man. He does a lot of, he did a lot of guests vocally. He tried, uh, such a long way to go. Yeah, yeah, that's what he sounds like.

I don't know how that proved what you were saying. That's Michael McDonald. He's all over all your hits, man. You love him. You know that. That's Michael McDonald, man. Some of y'all, you gotta listen. Get high and listen again, man.

That's the reason he keeps getting work. You are in Yacht Rock. I am in Yacht Rock. No, no, he's talking to me. Oh. Settle down, dude. I am in Yacht Rock. No, no, he's talking to me. Oh. Yeah, I... Settle down, dude. Holy shit.

Just because I played... What's his name? From Chicago. Peter Cetera in an episode of Yacht Rock should not make me an expert on Michael McDonald. Or Yacht Rock in general.

That's part of what's so funny about me being Peter Cetera. They put this really dumb wig on me that I don't think his hair has ever looked like that. And then I just get, Hall and Oates are really mean to me. Like they totally bully me. I'm pretty sure that's who that was. That guy's going to yell at me again.

Dog! You were in Yacht Rock! I never would have imagined in my entire life that someone would yell at me those words. Get yourself together, soldier. Yeah.

What do you think I am? Some sort of renaissance man? I should just stop getting Mark Wahlberg to come and just say that he's here and just play both parts. But I got a new pregame before the games game. A pregame game that I'm very excited about because you know how much I love to pregame. And we'll start with Brian

and we'll just go down the line one at a time. And there's no winning or losing. It's just kind of an opinion game. But it's called Tell the Truth. And I'll go first with Brian I'll ask you a question and just give me an honest answer Uh oh It's not gonna Don't worry about it

Things happen in San Francisco You ever fucked a drunk person? No It's not gonna be any moral questions or anything, really. Depends on what you do with it. Sounded slightly ominous. What is your favorite, absolute favorite, you have to pick one, Will Smith movie?

Hancock. I like it. Tell the truth! Jacob, what's your favorite Will Smith movie? Six Degrees of Separation. Tell the truth! M'Gaya, what's your favorite Will Smith movie?

I'm going to do this every episode of the show from now on. Always with Will Smith, or are you going to use different actors? Tell the truth! Can I pick two? I really liked the first Men in Black, but I also really liked him in Hitch. He was hilarious. I don't care. I'll fight you. I'll fight every motherfucker here.

Tell the truth. Men in Black is a good show. Tell the truth! Either Men in Black or Hancock, I think. I was laughing to myself the other day because we saw, Jacob and I saw an ad for Concussion and

Jacob was like, and the sound was off I think, we were in a bar, and Jacob was like, is that just a movie about people getting concussions in the NFL? And it's like, yeah, that's what it's about. Happy Christmas. What a great thing to see on Christmas Day. That's when it opens. So let's go watch that movie about concussions instead of staying home and watching the. So let's go watch that movie about concussions. Instead of staying home and watching the games,

let's go watch that movie. But it's Will Smith, and he plays a doctor who tells somebody, that's the ending of the trailer, the dramatic moment, is him yelling, tell the truth, with that voice. And crying a little bit. So I'm going to confuse my guests repeatedly with that. Because the audience is all going to laugh. It's like the standing ovation thing.

They didn't really stand up for you guys. I tell the audience to always stand up. And sometimes they remember. Why did you have to take that away from us? I know. I can't believe... I was about to tell something that's going to really rock Jacob Siroff's world and that's that stormtroopers don't really exist.

Even though you got your stormtrooper sweater on. The 501st exists. Those nerds who help sick kids. You know, the nerds who help sick kids in parades and stuff. What do they call it?

501st Stop saying it so fast The 500 and the 501st Division of It's like a 501st 501st Is a Star Wars reference

No, it's a thing in real life Guys that dress up like stormtroopers And do like charity and stuff Oh, okay And it's like nationwide And they're big Why that number? It's the 501st division

Some stormtrooper You know, why is that number? It's got to be a reference to the movie. How do you not know this? Tell the truth! You were in Yacht Rock! Do not lie about Yacht Rock! Alright, now

it's going to get real, because it's time for me to say, let the games begin! Gentlemen, you got lots of name tags to pick from. Hey, can somebody here at Good Nights flip house lights on so they can see a little better?

That would be awesome if that's possible. There you go. Hey, look at that. They're all over the place. So just go pick the one that you want to play for. And while they do that, we'll do this. We'll be right back. Hey, hey, hey, don't forget this app is brought to you by loot crate go to

lootcrate.com slash doug and enter code doug to save three dollars on your new subscription today back to the show we're back and i got a lifetime supply of donuts brian who are you playing for? Looks like you got some sugary goodness as well. Shaw Nut Holes. Nut Holes. Shawna? Shawna.

Is your name? Shawna. Shawna? Shawnut. Shaw Nut Holes. Shaw Nut Holes instead of Donut Holes. Instead of donut holes, and it's a box of donut holes from Kroger.

So, I just thought y'all might like a donut hole. Well, that's very nice of you, but some of the guests picked name tags that people put some work into. Well, she had to go get the donuts. Or a bigger box of donuts. Yeah, well, I didn't know when I got up here

that someone was just going to throw up donuts. There's 85,000 better donuts on the stage than those Kroger donuts. Because I don't even eat Kroger donuts versus Krispy Kreme. They're like generic. They've got an actual Krispy Kreme for free. Did Shawna write a shithead on the back? You didn't?

Oh, yeah. Oh, she was probably just going to eat him alone. That's so sad. Should I make a better choice? Is it too late? Am I committed to this? Yeah, you are.

You're not going to win anyway. I'm off to a bad start. Jacob's a vicious player. And who are you playing for, Jacob? I'm playing for Return of the Jenna. It's interesting. She did really well.

I always pick Star Wars. It's Star Wars and lights. It's got Jenna. It's got some dude who might be famous or might be her homie. I'm not sure who that is. That's Jeff Tate, isn't it? No. Oh, is that Jeff?

Yeah. Oh, it is. Oh, it's a weird look for Jeff. That's Jeff Tate with the hood on. Oh, that's totally Jeff. He doesn't have a hat or anything. Yeah. And that's Jabba the Hutt

straight up. She put Orny Adams on who's the headlining comic this weekend, but maybe she assumed he'd be on the show.

Yeah, she thought he might be on the show. That's a good detective work. He's got a Han Solo kind of vibe anyway. He's a handsome for a Jew.

He's a handsome guy. And then for some reason she left the episode six Return of the Jedi actual graphic on it. Like, she did all this work and then got lazy at the end. It's the wabi-sabi. It's the imperfection that makes it perfect.

Yeah. But... Well, that's a good one. There's a whole... Look at that. I don't want to... There's a whole battery rig on the... I mean, it's just a lot of work.

Yeah. No, people... Lots of people bring light up signs. Is this... Okay. What? Just making sure it's not a bomb or anything. And you're able to tell that by looking at it?

Quick, call a science comedian. Disarm it, Mallow. Yeah, disarm it. No. Is it the red wire or the green wire? This one was the bomb. Yeah, your donut holes did bomb. Anyway, good job, though, Jen.

And I already like Ungaios because it's a guard of the ends of the galaxy base, but what does it say? Guard Ryans. Ryans, I like it. Of the galaxy, and then Ryan is Chris Pratt, and then you're Rocket Raccoon. Oh.

You can see. He's got the nose and everything. It's really... I love that. That's great. I'm going to hang it in my room. Is it okay if a guy who keeps that? No, I can leave it.

Okay, I'll keep it. Sometimes they want them back, you know. What's up on the donuts, though? I'll wait. Do you want any of these? Have one, dude. There's a place called Wake and Bake. I'll wait. Do you want any of these? Have one, dude. There's a place called Wake and Bake.

I kind of have to try that donut. There's one over here with bacon on it, man. Oh, can I have one of those? I think there's just one. It's like a maple bar with bacon on it. Thanks, Will, Tammy,

Vic, and Christina. Somebody brought some donuts from Rise. That shit was vicious. You can even eat the dishes. Is that like a potato chip donut? Chocolate and potato chips? Look at these things.

That one has Reese's peanut butter cups on top of a donut. And there's frosting on top of that. Pineapple upside down donut. The Maui Waui. Get it? Because it's wake and bake. One of them has crumpled up

potato chips on it. One has some golden grahams on top. We'll be back with more of donut talk. One's an old bagel? One's an old bagel? Old bagel. Oh, that can't be good. No, it's hella good.

It's all savory and sweet and shit. Get it in. I get that. All right. So bizarre. Yeah, well, thanks for all the donuts, you guys. But they're really, they're fancy donuts. We can't throw them around because, you know,

the club's got a couple more shows tonight. These aren't that fancy. Can you pass me those, Brian? I'll toss some of these out. If you want one, hold up like one finger. I'll try to spear it on there. Oh, cheater. He tried. It was close.

So that would go all the way to the ground? This is the hardest game at the fair. Here, give it to me, though. The ring toss sucks at the fair. All right, who here will eat a ground donut? That guy. Oh! That was awesome. Did you play volleyball?

Are you a volleyball player? I'm on the women's volleyball team. She totally blocked that. I'll try that guy again. I'm sorry. She caught it and put it on his finger. She did like basketball alley-oop on that it so she put a donut ring on it She's a multi-sport athlete

Back row Oh shit I want to throw some at the back row Who knows Someone just got hit in the face Yeah sorry if I hit you in the face Is there a finger? Oh Yeah, sorry if I hit you in the face. Is there a finger? Finger?

The holes are too tight to land on your finger, to be honest. You just throw a fastball? This is like a carnival game where nobody wins. You catch it, does it mean you're getting... Did N'Gayo throw one? Yes, I threw the throw. How you doing? Did you catch it? Did Ngayo throw one? Yes, I threw the donut. Cross that off my bucket list. I prefer to have the donuts.

Oh! So close to spearing it. Really close. Man, that Old Bay donut is the shit Not too sweet Crispy cream glazed donuts Are the donut of choice for donut tossing Yeah, that was really That was good donut tossing

That was That sounds so dirty I love the way you tossed that donut What'd you do last night? Oh, I was tossing donut All night long. I was all up in that donut. I put the

bay seasoning on it, if you know what I mean. Yeah. We're gonna start today with a game called How Much Did This Shit Make? Yeah. called How Much Did This Shit Make? Yeah.

We'll start on the opposite end down there with Ngaio, and you're the first one to answer this. After Earth is arguably Will Smith's worst movie. Tell the truth! Yeah. But how much did it make at the North American box office during its entire run according to boxofficemojo.com

without going over Price is Right style? Yeah. Go. Ungayo. How much do you think that movie made? That movie didn't make dick. The old Hollywood Squares joke answer first.

I should have done it with a Paulina fresh fish. Let me tell you, love. $1.1 million. Wait, what? You're saying it made $1.1 million? $1.1 million. That's interesting because it sets up... It's not much money, and that sets up...

We could go over. Right. I don't think it went over. But then you just bid a dollar. You don't bid one million and one dollars. That's just

setting it up. That's setting a weird table. But maybe that's, you know, he's trying to throw you off with that. Strategery.

Yeah, it's total strategery. Right. What do you think, Jacob? I'm going to say seven million dollars. What?

All right, then. How much? Wait, wait, slow down. How much did you think, Jacob? I'm going to say $7 million What? Alright then How much did you say, Jacob? $7 million That's more than dick Okay So we got 1.1 Or 1 million and 1 No, 1.1

So 1 million 100 thousand? Yes Okay, now No, 1.1. A 1.1. 1.1 million. So 1,100,000? Yes. Okay, now I agree that it's a smart bet. Are you writing out all the zeros? Like, I mean, a big release, you know this, a big release is going to make more than 1 million. 1.1 million dollars. It didn't make a lot of money.

That movie made less than you thought. Or maybe it made more. I don't know. I've won this game with a guess of six. I guess Doug knows the answer. I'm stalling because I'm looking up the answer. Oh, you don't know the answer? I didn't have it. I meant to look it up earlier and I didn't.

Does anyone have the Wi-Fi password? This way he couldn't possibly subconsciously sort of transmit the information. That makes me feel better about my guess. This is the amount I would have guessed from looking it up earlier. I just didn't write it down. It seems accurate.

We've got $7,000,001.1 and what do you got, Brian? $7,000,001. $7,000,001. Science. That's science right there. Yeah, fucking science, man. Maybe you should

pick a new name tag. Fucking science. It made 60.5 million dollars. Really? Really? In North America? Which is terrible by Will Smith summer movie standards. That's true.

It's bad, but people went because it was Will Smith and it's mostly Jaden Smith. It was like a little... Oh, that's right. Yeah, they tricked people. The old bait and switch, I was going to say. What was that movie again? After Earth.

Oh, this is what happened. I was thinking of Battlefield Earth. Starring Will Smith. I'm not a renaissance man. I'm sitting there like, Will Smith wasn't in Battlefield Earth. Are there going to be any non-Will Smith games on today's show? That was just a fun segue from one game

to another. His name might not come up again. We'll see. But now I just got fascinated with the idea of looking up how much Battlefield Earth made. Yeah. Because I'm really curious, because I bet you that also made more than $1.1 million.

It's more than $7 million, right? Just dropping the mic and fucking walking off. At least all the Scientologists had to buy it. I don't know if that's how Scientology works. I don't think you have to support everything that they make. You could explain Beck. The butthurt is...

Okay, Batman, we're getting close. Keywords, Doug, keywords. Siri. It's Battlefield Earth, right? Yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah, because didn't you say Battleship earlier? Did I say Battle...

No, Battlefield. Battlefield. Did I say Battlefield Earth? I might have said Battleship. Somebody said Battleship Potemkin. Maybe that Battleship movie didn't gross that much. Yeah, Rihanna. No, Battlefield Earth,

that's what I was saying earlier about even a failure doesn't make $1.1 million. It made $20 million. But it probably cost 100 million. Oh yeah, lost a shit ton of money for sure. 21.4 is what it made. 21.4. Alright, that was fun. Thank you.

So Brian won that game. Means he gets to go first in ABCD's Nuts! Alright. This is a spelling game. It's not science, but it's close. It's another thing you have to be smart to be good at. We're going to spell an expression today.

And when I get to you, I'll say the next letter in this expression. And you just have to name any movie ever made that begins with that letter, the title. And you know, the only counts for T. So, if your letter's G, you can't say The Graduate and get mad at me when I throw you out. Okay. And we're going to spell

War on Christmas, because I'm sick of it. I'm sick of these stormtroopers trying to take over Christmas. Changing all the fancy sweaters. Oh, you've even got a stormtrooper elbow. It's like tennis elbow, but if you dress up in the 501st,

it costs almost too much. Yeah, exactly. That's probably why there's such horrible shots. Speaking of shots, can I get another drink? Two drinks. I'm having a Tito's and soda, please. I'll have a shot of Jameson.

Wonderful staff. Good nights. Be sure to tip them generously. Can I have anything with alcohol in it, please? Anything with alcohol in it. That's what you just ordered? Spin the wheel. Could you just pour the bar mat to a glass?

Put some orange juice in it. All right, so we're going to spell war on Christmas, and we're starting W is Brian's letter. Then we'll go to Jacob with the next letter, unless Brian fails to come up with a W movie. But go ahead. War Games. Yes.

I went with White Christmas. No offense. None taken. Jacob? Avatar. A is your name. Avatar. Oh, okay.

I went with A Christmas Story. R, Ungayo. Roots doesn't count, right? That's not a... For you, I would allow it. That's... That's... There's so many choices Why would you go with the TV show? Happy Hanukkah But you mean Kwanzaa?

I went with Some old ass movie That's I guess Christmas themed Called Remember the Night. Sure. Starring the original, the OG shithead, Barbara Stanwyck. Nice. You can go with Rooster Cogburn if you're going to stay all OG like that.

Yeah, okay. Now that I'm done. We're back around to you, Brian. And the letter is O. Oscar. Yes. Starring Sylvester Stallone. That's O. Oscar. Yes. Starring Sylvester Stallone. That's right. Yeah. Wow. Prequel to

Creed. Creed. I went with One Magic Christmas starring Harry Dean Stanton. Oh, look at that beverage. Thank you so much. Look like the one I asked for. I guess they're not going to get you guys anything. Mine will be here.

That's cool. Oh, you got something? Well, I think so. Okay. I had a donut. They could have really screwed me. Anything with alcohol. They just gave me a Yingling.

You don't know what they put in it. It's a waste of a joke. It's already open. You had one of those last night, though, right? Yeah, just now. Yeah. Great. Yeah, so that's why waste of a joke. You had one of those last night though, right? Yeah, just now. So that's why they brought you one. Because when they do it in the movies and they go, I'll have a beer.

I'm just like, really? You couldn't make up the name of a beer or get a beer sponsorship or something? You gotta just say, give me a beer and then the bartender just does it. Like, okay. It's like a 40 minute conversation with most? You gotta just say, give me a beer, and then the bartender just does it, like, okay. It's like a 40-minute conversation with most bartenders if you say, I want a beer.

Would you like to look at the list? When is Droopy your bartender? No, I just want beer. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I had you mistaken for a reader N is the next letter Jacob Right? More on Christmas

Yeah, let's go with Nell Seems Christmassy I went with something that's a little bit more Christmassy I went with something That's a little bit more Christmassy than Nell I went with National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

I mean they're both You know Christmassy In their own way C Oh C The letter C yes For some reason

I was on a different letter Oh you're gonna go XMAS C? The letter C, yes. For some reason, I was on a different letter. Oh, were you going to go X-M-A-S? Yes. Were you just sitting in your seat just going Xanadu, say Xanadu, Xanadu? Yeah. Captain Blood. What? Captain Blood.

Oh, okay. I went with Christmas with the cranks. Do you guys get what's going on here? You see what happens when you get to the south? You see? You see? You see? You better drink it fast.

Back to Brian for the letter H. Hero, the Jet Li movie. Okay. Not the Dustin Hoffman hero? Right. That's called Hero, too, right? No, Hero, yeah. Jet Li.

Yeah, then there was Heroes with Harrison Ford and Sally Field. Right? Her. Her. Wait, what's happening now? More H. Stop doing H, you guys. It's bad for you. Stop doing H.

I went with... Tell the truth. I went with Home Alone. Christmas classic. Very Christmassy. Very nice. I feel good about this, Jacob. I think you could take it home right now

if you match me with the letter R. I'm going Red Tails, no offense. Who are you offending with that? Who are you offending? Why would the black guys be offended by a movie about the Tuskegee Airmen? It's weird. I went with Reindeer Games.

That's a great movie. Yeah. Great movie. I. Un gallo, I. You what? I. I? Robot, no, I... You what? I... I?

Robot, no, I... Oh, okay, I robot. Robot. I'll be home for Christmas. S, Brian, you can do this. Feel good about it. Really? I should be able to guess this. You should. I mean, I have an S, but. You can do this. Feel good about it. Really? I should be able to guess this?

You should. I mean, I have an S, but I don't have... Letter S. Yeah, I don't have a Christmas. S, S, S. What do all of y'all... I'm not asking you,

but you fucking know one? Yeah, don't ask. Yeah, they all know it. You think you know what it... Really? They all know it. Oh, oh, yeah. Fuck.

Ah. Scro know it. Oh, oh, yeah, fuck! Ah! Scrooge. Oh! So close! That is a Christmas movie with an S. But I wrote down Santa Claus the movie. So that qualifies as Christmassy. All right.

T is the next letter for Jacob Is that the right order? Jacob? Christmas is tough I'm not gonna do it I'm just gonna say Tomorrowland I went with the Santa Claus Any thought? M, Mngayo I went with the Santa Claus. Any die. M, Mgaio.

Miracle on 34th Street. That is the correct answer. Yeah. You did it. You did it. I went A, Arthur. Hang on, you guys. What's going on? The A in Christmas, I went with Arthur Christmas. Oh, yeah, all right.

You saw that one with the kids? Yeah, that was great. Yeah, there you go. Father Christmas' cousin, Arthur. And then, Brian, for you to see, for the final S, I went with Scrooged. Oh! So, because I had it for the wrong S.

Yep, you said it the wrong time. The paper does not lie. I almost feel like I won that round. Yeah, you almost did. But now it's time to play Last Man Stanton This is a game where people tweet at me For days leading up to the show But I narrow it down to someone that I saw Tweeting the very day of the show

And I just pick one And hopefully they'll have a good suggestion for us. They're going to name an actor or an actress, and I play along in this game. We're all going to take turns naming movies that that person has been in. And we'll go the other way around. So it'll go N'Gayo, Jacob, Brian, and then me. And the person that I selected to help us out with a suggestion, where is Cooter Daniels?

Oh. Hello, Cooter. Drove in from Charlotte, did you? Yeah? So, sorry, locals. I'm going with an out-of-towner on this one. And, boo! Go Panthers!

How dare you! But I'm sure he suggested on Twitter that he's got a terrific name for this game. Hopefully one that hasn't been used before. But even if it has, we could play it again. What do you say, Cooter? Give us a name, Cooter! Julianne Moore.

I think we have played her before. But I'm... The guys are all doubled over. Not me! I love her. I'm fine with her. Let's give it a try. We'll see how we do. If it goes poorly, we'll get a new name.

I think we can go a few rounds with her. That doesn't sound right at all. That was really rude of me to say. But seriously, I could totally go after that big, bushyhy red bush of hers. Let us praise her for her talent.

That's a clue. Udaya, what's the first one? I get that clue. First, I'd like to say that I'm a huge fan of her work. I've seen her in some bad movies, but I've never seen her be bad in a movie. Thank God somebody stepped up for her honor. Hey, listen. Regardless of how cute she is,

and she's fine as hell. You didn't see her in Krampus. You didn't see her in Krampus. She's not in Krampus. I know, that's what makes it funny. We'll just start out with the big Lebowski. Yeah, okay. Good one, stoner.

You're out of your element, Donnie. Jacob. I'll take your element, Donnie. Jacob. I'll take your clue off the table. Shortcuts. Shortcuts, yeah. She pulls out her bush in that one. That's a good one. Robert Altman. Stands around arguing with Matthew Modine with her bush out. Was she like ironing or something? What? Was she ironing or just? Yeah, she's ironing and they get into an argument. She's ironing her pants because she spilled something on them or something. So that's why she's ironing and they get into an argument she's ironing her pants cuz she spilled something on him or something so that's why she's got her bush out and that's what you took from that scene yeah what else are you gonna

take from that scene fair enough did I did I say it was with Matthew Modine what's more memorable I was like a scene from Girls, except you wanted to see it. Whoa. Meanie pants. Brian, any Julianne Moore motion picture? Safe. Oh, you went with a... You should have pocketed that one for a little later. I should have, but I think I'm having trouble with the obvious ones.

Oh, okay. Whatever those might be. All right, well, I'll give you one, and then you'll go, oh, yeah, of course. Yeah. She just last winter won the Oscar for Still Alice. That's right. Yeah.

I guess you don't recognize that. All right. All right, Ngaio. We're four strong. We're doing good. Fuck, I just have one In my head Okay get it Get it back

Hold on a minute She was in the thing Just pull that one Back up again Yeah hold on Well fuck Alright I'll go to this one I was in it with her

Ha Nine months Oh that was filmed In San Francisco So you pop in there I'm Steve's friend Number one So you pop in there? I'm Steve's friend number one. And you're typecast.

Yes. I actually was. All right, Jacob? I might legit be out already. That's such a bad... Yeah, I know. You're not out. Julianne Moore. Come Yeah, I know. You're not out. Julianne Moore. Come on, you guys.

Come on, you can do it, Jacob. I can. Just say it. Just say that Julianne Moore movie. Red Bush. Tell the truth. Yeah, when they were making that movie, Will Smith tried it a bunch of different ways.

And it just wasn't that effective. Him going, tell the truth. I see truth, people. Tell the truth, Will. Nothing, Jacob? Not much. Really? I don't mind you bowing out at this point.

Was she... I might have to. This isn't for all the marbles. Was she in the aviator? What? Was she in the aviator? The aviator? Was she in that?

If she was, I wouldn't even take it. Wrong. Then can I give my joke answer of mask? This isn't a guessing game. What? Can I give my joke answer of mask? This isn't a guessing game. What? Can I give my joke answer of mask then? You think she looks like the kid in Mask? God and Gaio defended her out of the gate

because this got real ugly. I hated that category from Jump. Fuck you, man. Sorry. Right in the cooter. Fuck you and your red pussy. Jesus Christ. What happens out here in North Carolina, man?

What do y'all put in the water? That was a... Where are we, Brian? The Forgotten. Oh, I didn't remember that one. This one will bite you in the ass, Jacob. It's so obvious. Boogie Nights.

It's horrible. Assassins With Sylvester Stallone and Antonio Bontemps Yeah She put one of the asses in Ass-assins Yup Crap

I don't think I have anything else Oh come on You know you do You know you got a good one Um I think the guy That directed Safe There's some obvious ones. You know you do. You know you got a good one. I think the guy that directed Safe, Todd... Haynes?

Haynes. I think he used her in another film that was like a period. Seems like something he would do. Yeah. But I can't. Seems like people would want to work with her again. I would. But... But I can't. Seems like people would want to work with her again. I would. But, uh... Oh, what's that one where she's...

Oh, I know. So, it's, uh... Oh, I thought of another one. Are you writing these down, you fucker? Wow. Starring Julianne Moore. Happy birthday. And Julianne Moore in...

That's a great way to get yourself to say it. In? Julianne Moore is... Oh, that's... I don't know how often she plays the title character. I know she did, obviously. I think just in the Big Lebowski. Boogie Nights she obviously did. She was also Alice.

She was not the title character in Short Cuts. She's still Alice. Because that thing needs a trim. Did you give up, Brian? Okay, how about I'll just think of the movie that has the biggest ensemble cast that I can think of. That's a great idea. JFK? It would either be...

How about Magnolia? That's correct. You suck at this. That's crazy. Pulled it right out of his ass That's crazy But I really should have thought of a Robert Altman film If I was going for biggest cast But Magnolia, cool

Yeah, no, you nailed it P.T. Anderson's a big fan of Altman Really waxes his car As he likes to say I went with statistics Yeah, no, that was That was very science-y answer Most actors were in Magnolia

Yep, every time we play this game It's worth a shot Philip Baker Hall, yep Okay, so I'm gonna say The ladies man. Oh, yeah. Because she fucks him in a clown outfit. God, that was hot.

So fucking hot. And so she's got the red hair on top in that one, of course. You're getting me all worked up. Sorry. I'd like to buy you a fish sandwich, Doug. I'd like to buy you a fish sandwich, Doug. What do you got, Mr. Green Jeans? Is it the kids are all right?

Yes, it is. Yeah. What the? Yeah. Doug, y'all right in the wheelhouse, baby. You don't even know. She's not in a hard day's night. No, she's not. Are you just testing the waters? It's. You don't even know. She's not in A Hard Day's Night. No, she's not. Are you just testing the waters?

It's a different kids are all right. She's in the Who movie. She's in the Beatles movie. It's a different movie. It's a different kind of flying all-time. What's another one with a big cast? Yeah. Try that again.

The Player. Oh, yeah. She should be in that, but she is not. Oh, no. She's not. So it's player. Oh, yeah. She should be in that, but she is not. Oh, no. She's not. So it's a good try, though. I'll go with Evolution. Oh!

I saw that recently. It's the most science-y title ever. The David Duchovny one? Yeah. Yeah, Duchovny. Oh, shit. All right. Where are you at, Ngaio?

I had one. Okay. They keep slipping on you. Well, I smoke a lot of weed, Doug. Shit. All right, where are you at in Gaio? I had one. Okay. They keep slipping on you. Well, I smoke a lot of weed, Doug. Right. Smart. And I've been drinking. I'm not quite cross-dressing.

That explains it. That explains it a lot. It's tough for anybody up here. We had a bunch of people up on stage on Thursday night. Who were we trying to do? I can't even remember. That's how fucking hard it is. I don't even remember who it was.

Who was it? Harrison Ford. It was Harrison Ford. How could I not remember? And there were people that crapped out on Harrison Ford in the first round. Yeah.

Before all the Star Wars and Indiana Jones were even off the table. Yeah. That was crazy. Right. Because you just get up here and it's just different

when the pressure's on. Yeah, and then when you start mentioning like red bushes before the game, people get distracted. Sounds like an energy drink. Especially if you're a sex addict or a one-time possible sex addict.

Red bush gives you red wings. As long as it doesn't give her a red tail. Wow. Yeah. Went full circle on that one. You got anything? I don't know what you're talking about. The movie that I'm about to reveal to you.

Oh, I like this. I like this Graham Elwood ramp up. Julianne Moore. Fuck. I thought I had. I think she was in Fuck the Movie. No, she wasn't. No, that wasn't her in...

Fuck? Fuck. There was a... God damn it! Listen, you won anyway. Okay, well then I win. Okay. I shall win graciously.

What do you got, Doug? Crazy Stupid Love. Right. Free Held was the one that just came out recently. Yes, yes. And there's lots more, including The Lost World, Jurassic Park. What else you guys got?

Hunger? I thought of... Okay, wait, wait. One at a time, one at a time. So I guess there are no others. What? Catching fire. Hunger Games.

Hey, what's the one where she's obsessed with her son? Anybody? Hannibal. Savages. Savages. Somebody already said kids are all right. I love you yelling that. The kids are all right.

Glory. She's in Glory? Oh, Chloe. I was going to say Glory. I'm like, I don't remember her! Glory. She's in Glory? Oh, Chloe. I was going to say Glory. I'm like, I don't remember her in Glory. I mean, yeah. Blindness? Somebody yell Django Fett?

Yacht Rock! Curb Your Enthusiasm! Howard! Curb Your Enthusiasm is not a film. That's a television show, dude What was that over there? Austin Powers? The Hours

Oh, The Hours Austin Hours Children of Men Great movie That's right, Children of Men That's right Damn, she works Next

Yeah, she works a lot She stays big She was in the Psycho Shot for Shot One of the Bourne movies Children of Men Children of Men, yeah She works. Yeah, she works a lot. She was in the Psycho shot for shot. One of the Bourne movies? Children of Man, yeah. You just said that. What? Flight Plan.

Flight Plan, yeah. Happiness, Elizabeth Town? We did Still Alice. Doug burned that one early. I've seen all these movies. That's the worst. She's good like that. It's like Gary Oldham. I burned that one early. Yeah. I've seen all these movies. That's the worst. Yeah. She's good like that.

It's like Gary Oldham. She's so good. I hope she never hears this show. Maybe I'm not sure who she is. I don't... She's not the kid in Mask. Just next time she's in a movie, just try to look her in the face for once. And you'll lock in and remember.

Get lost in those freckles. Alright, you guys. Let's finish it off and determine a winner today with something that I call the reverse Malton game. Oh, shit. It's going to be first person to two points in this one.

And Gaia won the last game. And the game before that. You know, that doesn't get you anything extra. I know, I just have a hyper-competitive streak. I was in a circle jerk once and I came in first and third. Is that a Paul Lynn joke or is that yours? I go hard in the paint, player. Hard with the paint, too, apparently.

Paint's kind of... That guy in fourth, what a sad... What a pathetic... Beat twice by the same guy I mean that's a guy that takes a long time if you can get back in the game like that that's pretty

damn impressive alright so I'm kind of that guy of this game today. In fourth place. You still have, you know, anybody can take it from this point, and you don't even have to know anything. You can just force somebody else to name it. The guy who's going in for another donut.

Okay. Looks good. Potato chips. What? You took your glasses off to look at it? I'm 47. You look like a jeweler of donuts. Yeah.

I have a loop. Jacob works the word Jew into every performance. He said jeweler. I know. He worked the word Jew in, didn't he? He hides it.

He's Jewish and he lives here. Get him. Don't worry about me. I'm going home to Jew land tomorrow. I'm your most accessible target. Yeah, so we'll start with Ungayo

and then we'll go to Jacob. In reverse Malton game. God, you're enjoying that. Fuck yeah. As well you should, sir. Yeah. Delight. That thing's sweeter

than Julianne Moore. That's what I've named it. I want to scoot away. I feel like we've been too close anyway the whole game. You're both enjoying that donut. I've got Julianne Moore all over my face right now. Listen, Glazy, you get to pick. I have a glazy eye.

Between... Someone threw a donut at my face and now I have a glazy eye. Ugaio gets to pick between three motion pictures that I have chosen in advance quite randomly and you get to pick which one you think you know the most actors from as listed by

Leonard Maltin on this here app, and then you get to make the first bid after I tell you how many names Leonard lists. And then we'll go to Jacob, who will challenge you or bid more names, etc., etc. Now, do you have to do it in order of... Nope. Just have to name the names.

Oh, fuck. Really? Mm-hmm. Shit. And you get to decide which movie. So that gives you a real advantage here. You got all the juice now. Would you... He does really kind of work that word in a lot. He does.

Mostly he just says, I'm a Jew. There's not much of a work in. He just says it. That was a quote from the movie Juice, though. It was movie relevant. There was a movie called Juice? Yeah, Juice, remember? Omar Epps, Tupac was in it?

That's Juice. Juice, that's what I said. You got all the Juice now. You got all the Juice now. The danger of heteronims. That was in Schindler's List. You got all the Juice now. The Danger of Heteronims. That was in Schindler's List. You got all the Jews now, I think. Different movie.

I recommend both, though. It's a good double feature. Just on a glazy Sunday afternoon. Glazing on a sunny... Oh, go ahead. All right, your three choices, Lungayo, are Carrie, The Shining, or Christine.

Sensing a theme. There was even a cool Christine name tag in the audience. And a Carrie one. The ladies love the Stephen King titles. Because he loves to put ladies in the titles. Which one of those, Carrie the Shining or Christine, which one do you think you know the most actors that were in it? The Shining.

Okay. From 1980. Leonard only gives it two stars. That's crazy. The Shining. He reviewed it at the time, and at the time a lot of people were very disappointed by it. It became more of a classic

when revisited. Revisited? Yeah, you watch it again and go, oh, this isn't so bad. Stephen King didn't like it. It was weird, yeah. Stephen King was very against it. Of all the horrible adaptations from his novels, the Kubrick film with Jack Nicholson.

Don't give away the names. The Kubrick film, I said. Leonard lists... You really jewed that up. Leonard lists... Sorry, sorry, sorry. Leonard lists six names plus one other name that you just said.

So it's seven names. How many names do you think you can name in any order, but it has to be from the seven that Leonard listed, not that there's many more roles in the film. I can name three. He says three, Jacob. What happens if I can name three also?

I have to challenge him. That means nothing. That means nothing. You have to challenge him and hope that he can't name three people, and I'm sure he can. Or you can go four names, or five, or six, or seven.

Right, four names. You just gotta go deeper. Or hope a guy who screws it up. No, he knows the three, I know. He might have. I would bank on that. I don't know why your mic is the only one that's making feedbacky noises, but I'm guessing it's the cuffing thing that you're doing.

I'm Jacob Sierra for the microphone. It's Christmas time so I'm home alone. He said that part. I don't know. I don't know. You fight him.

Because that's what the movie's about right Kevin gets left behind Because he's the only Jew in the family Damn The rest of the family's like Hanukkah's over

We're going to Paris How did we end up On the Christmas show I don't know It's the most Christmassy, hip-hoppy episode ever. How many, Jacob? We're running out of time. Yeah, I can only do three

also, so go ahead. And you're doing the cupping thing again. I can only do three as well, Agao. Okay. So go for it. So, name three people from it. Scammer and Crothers. Shelly Duvall. And Jack Nicholson. Yeah.

The three. It's the easy way to go. And of course, Danny Lloyd was the little red rum finger, the big wheel down the hallway kid. Barry Nelson was the guy that showed him around the property when they got there. Joe Turkel was the bartender and Anne Jackson

I couldn't even tell you what she did in it but she got mentioned by Leonard so that means that Ungayo is on the board with one point Joe Turkel Tyrell and Blade Runner that's right you love all things Philip K. Dick.

Yes. You should have a podcast called Loving All the Dick. Yeah. No? It'd be fun at first, but that's rather limited. Well, it wouldn't just be about Dick. You could discuss other authors. What's crazy is I know that guy in real life fans do themselves as dickheads no joke

okay I'm stuck on Jacob saying he I know that guy Turkel Turkel his kids grandkids go to stop cuffing the microphone it microphone. Does it really sound that bad? Yeah. It gets real feedback-y. Like echo-y. Gets deep bass kind of thing. That's just my sex. A line's not so bad.

It should have happened when I did it too, but it didn't. I know that guy. I couldn't think of something for Bane to say in that moment. Jews live in the shadows. Okay, so... In North Carolina, they do. What's happening?

Apparently you guys are bringing the races together. Brian gets to go first. Oh, together. Brian gets to go first. Oh, shit. Brian gets to go first. He gets to pick between three films. And then we'll go to Jacob and then to N'Gayo. And we're playing to two points. N'Gayo has one.

Brian, do you know more actors from... Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion, or High School Musical 3 Senior Year? I can only say more than zero for Fast Times at Ridgemont High. More than zero? Yes. Okay.

Leonard Liss, hang on, you don't start naming names. You've got to bid and stuff. I'm not going to name. Yeah, Jack Nicholson is not in this one. And Leonard Liss, seven, ten, twelve names. So how many out of twelve that Leonard lists do you think you could come up with? Just give me a number. Okay, give me just a second. You're going to do them all in your head right now? Oh, well, I'm going to think of how many I can think of.

Is that how you play the game? It is, but I'd like you to really take a lot of time with it. I'm not going to take a lot of time. Just give me a second or two. I'd like you to take some fast time. Because I know one, two, three. He really is doing the whole. He's really talking us through it.

That guy doesn't count. I can definitely name. Shoot, I wish. I can name three for sure. Okay, he says three names, Jacob. I could do four for sure. Five. Oh, it's back around to you, Brian.

You got a bit more than five, or challenge Ngayo to... Ngayo. Name those names. Name five. All right, I think he can do it. Phoebe Cates. Sean Penn.

Don't say yes or no, you guys. Just let him name five names. Matthew McConaughey. No? Like I said, don't say yes or no. Oh, no, he's in the other... Oh, shit. Hold on.

Can I do four now? All right. Brian's on the board with a point. God damn it. Damn it. God damn it. Phoebe Cates, Sean Penn, Judge Weinhold. Yes.

Forrest Whitaker. Reinhold, yeah. Forrest Whitaker. I should know that. Mm-hmm. Yeah, that's the problem is you flipped over to Dazed and Confused yeah Ray Walston was Mr. Hand

Mr. Civelli was the science teacher what's her face that's also in the Hudsucker proxy Jennifer Jason Lee and you a Wichita girl Brian Backer was Ratner and Martin Brest has a small part in it. He's the director, of course. But, yeah, so we've got a two-way tie.

Now we've really got to get things moving. Jacob gets to pick the first category, and you get to choose. And then it will come to Brian. Which one of these do you know more people from, Jacob? Is it Night at the Museum? Night at the Museum Battle for the Smithsonian? Or The Secret Life of Walter Mitty?

I would say I've never seen any of the movies. Which one do you think you can recall somebody from it? Night at the Museum. Okay, the first one. Yeah. Three stars from Leonard. That's generous. It's all right, I guess. Eight,

eleven, thirteen names. How many can you get, Jacob? Five. Wow! Brian, you gotta challenge him him don't you I mean I know you spend a lot of nights

At the museum But Yeah but sadly I would have had to have said One Ben Stiller question mark The worst He just has information that he loves to share with people. I can't help it.

I'm sure everyone could name him. At least I only named in both fuck-ups. The most obvious. Yeah, the most obvious one. I challenge you. You could have just started with that. I'm going to go with five. Ben Stiller.

Robin Williams, It's like you cannot hold the microphone like a normal person. Mickey Rooney, Dick Van Dyke, Owen Wilson. Yeah, you did it. I don't know why I'm holding the microphone. We got ourselves a three-way tie I picked a tiebreaker

Well in advance Because tiebreakers don't happen all the time This one's probably been in here for a little while Ngaio gets to go first. And then we go to Brian and then Jacob. Because Brian challenged Jacob in that last thing, right? Yeah, he did. Okay.

The motion picture is called Pulp Fiction. And Leonard lists 12 names. Six. Whoa. Out of the gate fast was six, Brian. Yeah, I'm going to have to challenge you on that huge number. I can't beat that.

I can't do seven. Sorry, Jacob. You got boxed out on that huge number. I can't beat that. I can't do seven. Sorry, Jacob. You got boxed out on that one. Ungayo, name six people from Pulp Fiction. Don't say yes or no, audience, until he's said them all. John Travolta. And also don't sneeze, because some people are...

Maybe you're allergic to correct answers. Okay, that's one. Samuel L. Jackson. Two. Amanda Plummer. Three. Ving Rhames. Four.

Bruce Willis. Five. Uma Thurman. Six. That's six. That's all I needed. That's six. Yeah.

Show off. Keep going. Harvey Keitel. Quentin Tarantino. He didn't get listed. He didn't make the cut. Who's the kid from Mask? Not Julianne Moore.

Jim Carrey. Jim Carrey's not in it. Eric Stoltz. Eric Stoltz from Mask, yes. Rosanna Arquette. Uh-huh. Who puts a watch up his ass? Christopher Plummer.

No. Or Christopher Walken. But at least if you're a plumber, you could get that thing out of there. Hello. That's why they had Amanda on the set. And who's the boxer? Did you say him?

I said Bruce Willis. Oh, you said Bruce Willis. Maria de Medeiros is also listed. That's right. Yep. Bing Rames, of course. Yep. And yeah, that's Pulp Fiction.

Wow. Ungaio is our winner. What's up, Ryan? I'd like to thank my lord and savior, Marijuana. Do some quick plugs, Ngaio. Emerald Cup Outdoor Cannabis Competition next weekend. The Velveeta Room in Austin, Texas January 22nd, 23rd

and the LOL River Center in San Antonio Monday, January 18th. Nice. Thank you. And I'm in McAllen on like the 19th with, oh, at the CineKing Cinema El Rey. You're done. Jacob. Un gallo 420 on Twitter.

That's it. Jacob, you're off. I'll plug the New Year's Eve show at Cop's Comedy Club in San Francisco. Oh, that's gonna be fun. And also I would like to plug the Sketch Fest in San Francisco. January 16th, I'll be doing a special Weezer-themed comedy show. Oh, that's fun.

I was asked. Believe it or not, I didn't put it together. I was asked to do it. Weezer and Star Wars are Jacob's favorite things. It's because you look just like Buddy Holly. And Brian Mallow, what do you got to plug? You know what? I just want you to do one thing on my YouTube channel, Science Comedian.

I did a long Skype interview with Neil deGrasse Tyson, and I've just started uploading I have five clips from it so far, including asking him what his favorite movie is. Ooh! It's not Gravity! It's Shortcut. So, go watch them and share them,

please. Science Comedian, at Science Comedian on Twitter. There you go. Brian Mallow, Jacob Searoff, and Nungayo Bilem. Tear your shithead off of there, Jacob. We don't need yours, Nungayo. You won. Where's the person you played for? Let's give him the

prize bag. Come on, Ryan. The guy with the worst seat just helped me with the prize bag Very helpful Yeah, just hand it over It's very heavy, so be careful That bag's going to fall apart Ryan Did you get that thing off of there? Just pass it down or take it off

There you go. Yeah, she probably wants that sign back because it's so nice. And then, of course, the donut, Shauna, doesn't get a shithead because she didn't write one on there. I don't have time to mess with it. California, don't miss my holiday taint shows December 27th through 31st in San Diego, Irvine, Sacramento, and San Francisco. Douglovesmovies.com. That's Douglovesmovies.com. That's DouglasMovies.com. You guys, Raleigh,

good night. You killed it. Great time tonight. Such a fun crowd. I had a feeling this would happen and then it did. So that's always nice.

I will do this again here at this very club if they'll have me for sure. For sure. But where's Shauna? Where's she at? I feel bad now. Where is she? Who do you want me to call a shithead

Just anybody at all Yeah just yell it Okay Yeah let's fucking do Santa Let's throw some profanity around In the same sentence with Santa Santa's got a big red bush Let's totally fucking do Santa you guys

Oh I have like six DVDs left. What are you doing? I'm trying to make a little gas money. I have six DVDs left. And some weed. If you want to buy a joint, he's got a little bit of weed left. Buy one after the show from me.

Yeah, yeah. He's got a few of those left and Guy will be around. And I'll be downstairs. I'll go to the factory, the bar downstairs if you guys want pictures or me to sign your name tag or whatever.

Come down there, hang out, have a drink. It's going to be very informal. And as always, the Team Graham versus Team Sam rivalry is a shithead. Why can't we love them both? And fucking Santa is a shithead! Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky There's no room in his heart for you

Cause Doug loves movies