Doug Loves Movies - Paul F. Tompkins, Ben Acker, and Ben Blacker Guest

Episode Date: September 30, 2014

Doug welcomes podcasting giants Paul F. Tompkins, Ben Acker, and Ben Blacker to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, candy babies, sticky seats with 50-oz and popcorn kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, but Doug loves movies! Hey everybody! My name is Doug and I love movies! Hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies! This is Doug on Movies! Coming to you from the UCB Theater in Los Angeles on Tuesday, September 30th, 2014, Wolf of Wahlburgers. Since last I spoke, you listened.

I did a Dining with Doug and Karen with guest Megan Nuringer, which should be available in the podcast section of iTunes, probably where you also got this. Now, Madison, Wisconsin, I'm coming back for one last Doug Loves Movies taping this year at Comedy

on State. Three great guests. Oh, and Comedy on State, of course, is the comedy club on State Street. Did I mention the show was at 420? Now I have Sioux Falls, South Dakota. Yeah, I'm doing stand-up at the Orpheum Theater on Saturday, October 11th. Bring your name tags.

Now it's time for Tweet Relief, tweets about movies. At Woopsie daisy tweeted Doug Bessage had hosted a reality show with competing growers in Colorado called There Will Be Bud this has been tweet relief Paul Thomas Anderson edition I am so looking forward to that

have you seen the trailer for Inherent Vice oh my god it's back where I wanted him to be you know There Will Be Blood and The Master were amazing achievements Have you seen the trailer for Inherent Vice? Oh my God. It's back where I wanted him to be. You know, there will be blood in the master. We're amazing achievements that bored the shit out of me. And I'm very excited that he might be going back to Boogie Nights territory. Prize bag.

Got some good stuff because I was on At Midnight yesterday. And so, yeah. Came in second place to that son of a bitch Kyle Kinane who now me and Kyle Kinane and Ron Funches are all tied for the most wins with five apiece. So yeah, so a showdown must occur and

this is a box of cookies from I think it's called Deluscious Cookies. They give me a whole box every time I do at midnight, and then I give it to you guys. Quality cookies, I'm told. We got a Doug Loves Movies t-shirt. Of course we do. We've got a Gateway Doug 2 Forced Fun.

And we've got, I think I accidentally threw more than two in. Yeah, four hot dogs from Pops. I didn't get a chance to get the gifts that are being given out by my guests tonight so we will

hopefully they will bring them with them when they come out here and then we will hear all about them. Please give a big warm welcome to Ben Acker, Ben Blacker, and Paul F. Tompkins. Thank you. Oh my goodness. That's a whole other bag. That's a whole nother bag. That's insane.

It's an insane big bag of stuff. Ben Acker and Ben Blacker, you guys. First time guests on the show. Thank you. Which is which. Which one are you? Acker. So I'll call you Acker and you Blacker.

Is that what your friends do? I'll go with it. Whoever meets one of us first calls us Ben. And the other they call by the last name. Oh, you're meeting us at the same time. Which one did I just meet first? I think you. Yeah, I'm Ben.

Okay, Ben. And that'll be easier for me to remember because you're not black at all. Am I? I mean, you're blacker than Acker. That's right, exactly. Who's blacker? Yes.

Starring Anthony Anderson. Blackfish? Do you guys listen to Thrilling Adventure Hour? I knew there'd be some fans. Wikipedia still thinks it takes place at the Coronet, so you might want to

reach out to them and say it's called Largo. Yeah, that's on Largo, I think. They have to update. That's them? I think that's an issue for the Coronet's Wikipedia page. Yeah.

Is the Coronet's Wikipedia page end with now called Largo? Apparently not. That would be... Would they even have a Wikipedia page?

Do they give it to buildings? Disambiguation. Why? Why wouldn't a building There are theaters with Wikipedia pages? I'm sure there are. There's gotta be right

But I just never You're the one That's questioning it I've never I've never used it for that I've never been like I'd like to know more About this building

Wikipedia No you never had to You live a charmed life I really do That's Paul F. Tompkins Everybody Hi I'm me Thank you

I always like to scan And see if nobody's clapping. That person. There's always people that don't want to expend that energy because they know they might want to later. For like driving home or rescuing a child from a fire. Yeah, that's right. You know, it would be horrible to be like,

I'm not going to rescue that child because I clapped for Paul F. Tompkins. That really took it all out of me, and now I wasted it. Left it all on the field. My palms are so tired from clapping. That's a big part of putting out fires. Oh, I thought of rescuing children.

Well, you have to pad out the fire in order to get to the child. Who's not helping, by the way. He's like, yeah, I'm scared. Yeah, kids are the worst. They don't pitch in on a disaster. Doug, don't get me off on a rant about children and fires.

What? Colonel Clink at the end I know nothing What Would you bring for a prize tonight Paul F. Tompkins I brought some things to remind people that I do stand-up comedy It's a bunch of my albums And a DVD Alright

Don't trouble yourselves. Think of the children. Might be children to save, yes. Think of the children. Doug's inability to come up with a reaction to that caused the audience to feel as if they had failed somehow and that they had to applaud. Are you disappointed that's what I brought, Doug?

Not at all. I was just in my head wondering how many of these things you have. Am I counting correctly? You have four different specials? There's three CDs and one DVD. Yeah, and they're all different material. All? No, that's not strictly true.

Oh. They're all the same material. Wait, four different CDs Wait, four different languages. One of them, oh, I see. I was going to guess you were drunk on one, sober on one, asleep on one. What am I, you? Wait, I've never done the drunk sober thing.

But you did hoist how many pints on a special one time? Four pints of Guinness in a half hour. many pints on a a special one time four pints of Guinness in a half hour four pints of Guinness in a half an hour don't recommend it

while telling jokes if you're taping a TV special can people still see it yeah it keeps popping up on HBO you're proud of it right

I am yeah you got through it yeah yeah I got through it we did we did two tapings that night and so I

it was me and Greg Barrett did specials the same night. And so it started with mine, then Greg's. Then in between, I drank a ton of water to sober back up again. And then Greg would do his second taping, and then I would do my final taping. And then at the end of that night, my stomach was distended and hard as a rock because there was so much fluid in it. I was just filled. And at the end of the special, and you can actually see this,

a drop of beer comes out of my nose. And that's going to happen again tonight. I want to see that. And that's going to happen again tonight. It's a promise. I'm going to fill myself with liquid just under my eyeballs. Greg's special was called Mantastic, I think. That's correct.

And I attended both tapings, I believe. That's right. Yeah. It was an unfortunate slogan for Greg's special, because afterwards he would say, you've been Mantasticized. Bump people out. That is unfortunate. It did.

It shut everybody down. Mostly people that didn't even know what that word means. What is this mug that's in the prize bag? Blacker, would you like to explain this? Ben and Blacker. I'm glad you asked. It's one of the non-segments in our show. It's a series of ads called the Bucatino Business.

Would you care to explain non-segment? You can't throw that out there like everyone understands that term. I had to put it together, and I'm in the show. Only for 10 years, though. Okay. You guys know segments, right?

Hold on. Let's back up. What a show is. Yeah. The Thrilling Adventure Hour is a stage program in the style of old-time radio that is also a podcast on the Nerdist Network.

Thank you, that guy. He loves descriptions. And in the live show, in the live show, we have ads from our pretend sponsors, one of which is called Work Juice Coffee, and the ad is from Bucatino Business. And Ben and I... Two ads in one.

Yes. It makes sense in context. We set out to write the saddest thing we could think of. So it's this guy who runs an office supply store in an office park, and his life just keeps going terribly, terribly wrong. It is as close as we could get to a tragic soap opera

in the radio genre. Through the eyes of a guy just trying to sell pens in a world that doesn't want pens. But just keep in mind, this is a non-segment, you guys. Don't expect it as a segment. I don't know what that is. You brought a ton of stuff for the

bag, including Meryl Streep, Anatomy of an Actor, whatever that poster is for. That is an exclusive poster from Karina Longsworth that wrote a book about Meryl Streep. Oh, okay. I don't know how the hell

that wound up in there. So that's the poster for it. That's the poster for it. And you have it. Now, is this unfair to say that that looks nothing like Meryl Streep? That might be Karina. It's, yeah.

No, it's Meryl Streep. It's Meryl Streep-ish. Come on. It's Streep-ish. It's, uh, yeah. It's Meryl Streep. It's Meryl Streep-ish. Come on. It's Streep-ish. It's Streepy. All good books need a poster. I don't know. She gave it to me.

You guys, listen Blacker, you brought a lot of stuff. You guys are involved in an issue of Deadpool, the comic. Woo! So you wrote it, those other two people drew it. Is that how it worked?

Yeah, that's how we divided it up. Did you guys even try to draw it first? I tried. It was not a good result. Stick figures? Puppets? Paul. He doesn't know what drawing is.

We've also got copies of the Punisher vs. Thunderbolts 1 and 2. Those are the first two parts of our Thunderbolts arc. We also didn't draw that. What did you draw? Just my puppet show. Did you draw...

I don't know what that is. Chulhu dice. Chuluhu dice? Chuluhu. On this? Chuluhu? How do you say it? Chuluhu. Chuluhu.

So somebody's going to win Chuluhu dice. That's like Dungeons & Dragons dice, right? But it's with some H.P. Lovecraft bullshit thrown on there. Yeah, and some fucking beans or something. Is that from the cruise? Right, because it's from the... We went on this... That's some leftover swag from the Jonathan Coulton cruise.

Oh, okay. I was wondering where that came from. You know about this. You've got stickers that say Thrilling Adventure Hour and Welcome to Night Vale because you guys have been doing some crossovers. We have. Do you guys know the Welcome to Night Vale podcast?

Are you familiar? Yeah. It's very popular. We did, yeah, we did a big crossover with those guys with a bunch of our actors and it was a lot of fun.

And it's, for you who are sitting here today, it is released on Bandcamp and iTunes tomorrow. And for you who are listening, it's already been released. So, get on board. That's fun.

I love that you know the whole schedule of how we tape and release this podcast. I know how podcasts work. A lot of them don't release them the next day like we do. That's true. We're on it.

This would be fun to maybe just bust out and play right now. You brought a card game called Who Am I? A Name Game of Hollywood Stars. I thought you might enjoy it. Let's do one real quick. I thought you might enjoy it. This might enjoy it. Let's do one real quick. I thought you might enjoy it. This might be awful. Does everyone already have this game?

No, no, it's awful. It's really awful. Is it bad? I've been in training for this podcast for three weeks. All right, you guys. We picked this game up. First one of you that can come up with the name of this person As I read all these clues

Just jump right in Will you end it with who am I? And then we will say you are It starts with who am I But yeah at any point Why would they say who am I for the end? I don't know it starts with it But I'll say it at the end

I can Would you start it with Here's who I am And it at the end. Should we? I can... Would you start it with, here's who I am, and then all the facts, and then end it with, so who am I? I love it. I love it.

But I think you're going to jump in with the answer before I get through all these facts. Well, I was not trying to give you a line reading. No, that's cool. Please do it your own way. Who am I?

It's already... Someone's sad. I'm sad. I'm sad. Someone's sad. My real name is Isur Demski. Isur Demski. Isur Demski.

I have my doubts about that pronunciation. Isur Demski. Demski, there's no way around it. No way around it. That's fucking Demski. Demski's Demski? There's no way around it. That's fucking Demski. I was born on December 9, 1916 in Amsterdam, New York.

Isla Fisher. Patrick Demski. Good guess. I believe I get all the rest of the clues. I believe I get all the rest of the clues. What? I believe I get all the rest of the clues. Four of my sons. My dearest darling sons.

Is that on there? My gifts from God. One of whom went astray with drugs, but let's not bring that up on a trivia card. Four of my sons. They all followed me into the movie business. Two as actors

and two as producers. But none of them are named Demski. This is a fucking bitter card. Who am I? That's it. Yeah, but I ended with who am I as instructed.

But this person, the person saying this is not a star, right? This is the... Oh, he's a star, all right, or she. Oh. Michael Douglas. No, Kirk Douglas. That's correct.

Wow. I did not know that his name was Ischor Dembski. Ischor Dembski. Ischor Dembski. Weird. Hold on, we have one more guess. Isla Fisher. Hey, this is a mug that has that iconic painting with the movie stars.

Night Hawks at the Diner by Edward Hopper. You can't make them out, though. No, the iconic painting is not of the movie stars. Oh, that's the knockoff. That's the bullshit Hollywood Boulevard gift store version. Who was in the original version, just four random people? Nobody, just four people.

Marilyn Monroe wasn't in there? It was Humphrey Bogart. James Dean wasn't in there? No. Kirk Douglas? Elvis? No. Who was in the original Sunflowers?

Just a bunch of nobody sunflowers? So anyway, all of that's going into the prize bag tonight. So congratulations. Somebody's going to have a lot of stuff to deal with. A lot of decisions to make. Sorry you have to deal with all that stuff. You guys are going to have to deal with it. What a lovely round of reluctant applause.

Wait, do you see their shitty name tags? It's just not... They don't care. It's the LA attitude. We have fun, though. We do, right? We have a good time. Have you been to the movies lately, Paul F. Tompkins? I've seen a bunch of movies.

Tell us about your favorite one. Oh, my favorite one is Brendan Gleeson. The guy, it was... Calvary? Yes. That is a fucked up movie. Absolutely loved that movie

and it made me seek out The Guard by the same writer-director. I had never seen The Guard and I heard it was hilarious. I saw it on a plane coming back from Canada and now I have joined the ranks of people who laugh out loud I saw it on a plane coming back from Canada, and now I have joined the ranks

of people who laugh out loud at a movie on a plane. I envied those idiots for so long. I was like, we'll watch some Sandra Bullock movie and wake me up. Yeah, like 28 Days Later or something like that. 28 Days. It's 28 Days Later. 28 Days of Dresses. But later. 28 days of dresses.

But yeah, those movies are great. I also saw, I watched a lot of Godzilla, the most recent Godzilla movie. How much is it? But not all of it. No, I was like, oh, that's right. I'm in control of my own life. If there's a button I can push and watch a lot of things.

That's right. I'm not excited that Godzilla's head looks like a Ford Duster. Did you get to the Godzilla part of Godzilla? This just in. I did get to the Godzilla part. I got to the Godzilla part, and I give these people credit for trying to up the human drama factor,

but by the time Godzilla showed up, I was like, oh, thanks for dropping by. Paul. It really is almost Godzilla-less, that movie. Of the two people in the ads Godzilla and Bryan Cranston

Yes Who was in the movie less? Godzilla But it's close The amount that I saw But it's close It's super close Spoiler alert

They get rid of Bryan Cranston at one point I will admit I will admit that I might have been checking some email while I was watching Godzilla

and there was a point where I realized, oh, Bryan Cranston's not coming back to this movie, right? I looked away at the wrong time. I had to find out if I brought that border with me. He was like, I am the one who leaves. And then they never heard from him again. That wig was amazing, though. It was.

Godzilla? It was a good Godzilla. Godzilla. I have a wig. Very amazing. I've not seen Godzilla? It was a good Godzilla. Godzilla? I have a wig. Very amazing. I've not seen it. Yeah. He has a bouffant hairdo.

Now I'm in. Yeah. Now I'm in. He says, kiss my grits, and then he stomps on the ceiling. Do you smile, Ben Blacker, every time you see the Chris Rock special, what is it? Bigger and Blacker? Does that ever make you go, yeah! I'm like, I'm on TV now.

This is it. Sit through the whole thing every time. This is the kind of spontaneous publicity that makes people. Do you know anybody named Bigger? What a comedy team you would make. Great photo op. I gotta find Bigger. Oh, what a comedy team you would make. Great photo op. Sorry, bad news, buddy.

Great photo op. I gotta find Bigger. I'm sorry. You're out. You're out, Ben Acker. What a way to find him. Are you gonna ask them if they've been to the movies? That was just what I was gonna say after,

after, um. This is as well-oiled a machine as it sounds on the podcast. Yes, right? I'm impressed. Yeah, it's exactly what you expect. Why surprise anybody? I expected you to be holding your microphone, though.

Oh, really? He's just kind of leaning on it. I like to go hands-free. I got a lot of things to do. You used to hold it, right? Like, you could fall asleep on it. Back in the day, and then I was like, do you guys have a little mic stand?

And then Jimmy was like, yeah, we do. What, the one as big as me? Ben Acker. Yes, sir. What was the last movie you saw? Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. Oh! You had just seen it for the first time?

I just saw it for the first time, too. Isn't it great? Oh, that was not the question. Oh, he got you on a technicality! I am good. This is like a dwarf rocker. All right. Dwarf rocker. So probably the only person

that could pull that role off is Peter Dinklage. What about Tim Conway? Oh, okay. You're right. I'm was thinking of people that didn't have to put the shoes on their knees. Do you feel like

Tim Conway was very pleased with himself when he came up with dwarf? Like, pretty subtle, right? Yeah. What does it sound

like to you? Goes around to everyone in the crew. No, I get it. I get it, Tim. It's like dwarf with no W. I'd never put that together.

I think the other Ben needs to answer. Oh, wait. Scott Pilgrim, Be the World. What about Scott Pilgrim? Yeah. I really liked it still. It's fantastic. Oh, still, you watched it again.

Yeah. But how did Paul just saw it for the first time? I saw it for the first time in Toronto. Oh, perfect, you watched it again. Yeah. But how did Hall just saw it for the first time? I saw it for the first time in Toronto. Oh, perfect. In Toronto, I saw Scott Pilgrim versus the world for the very first time in my whole goddamn life. I enjoyed it. It wasn't good.

I lost, I can't remember how the rest of the tune goes. Yeah, it was amazing. I don't know why I didn't watch it the first time. I think I was afeared that it was not for me, that it was for a younger audience. I think that's what happened to that movie. Everyone went, that's not for me. I thought it was for kids.

And then later it was like, oh, that's for me? It was so good. It was so, so good. Yeah, it's amazing. All the actors in it are terrific. They've all flourished since then. Edgar's doing all right. But we have one more person to ask.

Thank God. Ben Blacker. Here's the thing, Doug, and Paul and Ben. Thank you. I haven't been to the movies in some time, but my wife somehow did not see Ben. Thank you. I haven't been to the movies in some time, but my wife somehow did not see it. My wife.

Classic comedy bit. That is like a cancer. A cancer. I just like that sometimes... Come on. A cancer, yeah. I wish that would catch on. But sometimes somebody will say,

my wife in the wrong place for me to do that, and I'll do it anyway. And so that's why I do it every time. Can I tell you, it's always the wrong time to do it. But it gets extra wrong. It's, mm, eh, eh, eh, ah, uh. God forbid if somebody I know,

their wife dies and I'm at the funeral. Would she die of a cancer? It makes me laugh. All right, go. My wife somehow did not see movies in the 80s, 90s, or 2000s. So the first... So you're edubicating her?

Well, the first Tom Cruise movie... Hold on, let's let this person check their email. Thank you. Check that out. It's on Twitter. We've tweeted about it. The first Tom Cruise movie she saw was Ghost Protocol.

Ghost Protocol! First one of her entire life? Right? That's weird. You gotta start with losing it. The second one she saw... Maybe The Outsiders. That's on her. The second one she saw was Edge of Tomorrow, which she loved, both of those. So we've been watching Tom Cruise movies.

Right, because she's convinced this guy knows what he's doing. And then they just get weaker and weaker. Well, we watched The Firm, which is actually pretty good. It's pretty good, sure. What? Are you guys out of your minds?

It is! No, it's not. Sidney Pollack? Holly Hunter's life is spared because she's blowing a guy. Oh, I stand corrected. She's great in that, guys. Sidney Pollack directed.

It's not good. Thank you, Ben Hacker. It's pretty good as far as bad movies are concerned. It's a pot boiler. I'll boil your pot. Oh, he needs that. Gene Hackman is fucking in it, man. He's great in it.

Except for Welcome to Mooseport, that guy was 100%. Gene Hack, Mr. Hackman, of course. I yield to no one in my admiration for Gene Hackman. He was in a lot of shitty movies. I saw The Firm recently myself. Yes, I had missed it when it was in theaters. I'm like, oh, this is not good. We enjoyed it.

Well, I'm glad for you. Do you want to come over and watch The Pelican Brief? See, that's the one I didn't care for. Not so good. I did not like that one. Well, Tom Cruise is good. It doesn't have Tom Cruise in it at all, which that's the biggest problem.

Hardly at all. Ghostbusters! But Tom has made a remarkable amount of engaging movies. We're going to get to the Sting movie. So far and away. Far and Away. Days of Thunder. Interview with a vampire. Oblivion.

That Top Gun one. I could do this all night, guys, but this isn't Last Man Standing with Tom Cruise. We have to pick some name tags, you guys. It's time to let the games begin. We got some good ones. People are stepping up. Delightful. We got a massive sandwich

over there. We've got the Kevin in the Woods. Of course, instead of Into the Woods, the Sondheim musical. I get it. It's Kevin in the woods. The Sondheim musical. I get it. Cabin in the woods. And they picked their name tags

so fast that we're going to just squeeze in some commercials right now and we'll be right back. We're back! Who are you playing for? Ben Acker. Ben Acker. Ben Acker? A goat?

Boo! Who brought an empty donut box to this game? Are there donuts in there? Is this your name tag? Wait, why is there a separate donut box that we had to ask for? This has names in it. We have more donuts.

Oh, there's more donuts over there. I don't know if I care for that. I think we've got to throw away a lot of these name tags. Start over. What? It did it. It did it. Those are gorgeous.

These are Ghostbusters themed. Ghostbuster? Crispy creams. Yeah, let's show the crowd. Look at that motherfucker. These are crazy. That's a Stay Puft Marshmallow Man donut touched by Doug Benson. If there's not marshmallow

in there, I'm going to be fucking pissed. Look at this one. It's the classic Ghostbusters logo. If there's not slime in there, I'm going to be fucking crazy. But a ghost is being slimed on this donut. The worst kind of crime. Why don't they just slime them back?

Why don't they do that? Doug, thank you for asking. I'm playing for Breezy Puffs. Puffs? Breezy Puffs. Breezy Puffs. Asking the eternal question, who are you going to call?

It's written in there. She was in the front row last night when I was, yeah, at midnight. I was shamed by Kyle Kinane. Shamed by Kinane? Yeah. You were Kashamed? You've never come in third place on that show, have you, Paul?

Never. Never. Me neither. Winning's great, but coming in third, I'd never want to do it. I don't want that red light on me. Yeah. I will run. I will wait. I won't wait for it. I'll get out of there before that red light shows up. Oh, yeah. I'll ruin their fucking shot.

Pull a Jimmy Pardo. That's what he did? I saw him on the show. He came in third, and they said... And he said, I want to beam out Star Trek style. And so they, like, did an effect where he was gone. Because I'm sure Jimmy said, I don't want to stick around for the humiliation part. I don't blame him.

Why did he come in third? I'm going to run out of that studio. Why did he come in third? If I come in third, please. If I come in third ever on that show, I'm going to run out of that studio. In makeup, with the microphone. I don't care. They'll find that mic in the parking lot.

You know that red light will follow you, though. Oh, shit. Did not know that would happen. Oh, science. Well, I'm gonna eat one of these donuts. For reals? Who are you playing for? I'm playing for the secret life

of Dana Lilly. Okay. They took a cover of a DVD case. Oh, I get it. I think she bought it from the second-hand store next door and slapped a pasted. I love it.

Great work. Dana Lilly. Who are you playing for, Paul? I'm screwed in this game Dana Lily Who are you playing for Paul? I'm playing for Flight of the Kim Chords I imagine her name is Kim And she put a pasted on it But Kim also has been getting

A lot of jokes that no one else Hears or cares about And so I keep looking back at her And we give each other reassuring looks. We both understood that, and it was funny, Paul. Can these go in the prize bag after? Oh, I imagine... Do you guys want these back?

Is the DVD in there? I don't know. Did you even look? There's a donut in here! It's in there, so yeah, I bet you they want it back. You want it back, right? You want it back? Are you going to watch

Walter Mitty again? She's feeling melancholy. She watched Ben Stiller travel around the world. Sure. Jump off of boats. And the Flight of the Conchords, they want that back too.

Sure. Of course they do. That's probably more than the Walter Mitty one. If I had to guess, but you know. I'm sorry, I couldn't understand you. Could you have some more donut? I'm going to put more donut in my mouth.

Talk about my morning water for me, boy. I mean, it's not stupid to be like a cowboy, you think? And it's big like a lot of meat. And then the structure's clear. Apologies to put your hands together.

To determine who goes first in the Lettermonk game, let's do some lines with Mark. How are you guys doing? Do you want to do some lines? Mark, of course, is busy making Transformers 4. 5? What number are they on? And so he has pre-recorded a line from

a motion picture that we will run that for you. It can only be performed by Mark Wahlberg. And then the first guy who knows it, just jump in, yell it out, and you get to go first in the Leonard Mullen game. Mark? You guys want to do some fucking lines?

Yeah, we've already... He always says that again. I don't know why he just doesn't... Drainage. It's drainage, Eli. There will be blood. That is correct. How long is the line? Can we hear all of it? There's 40 more seconds.

Oh my God. 44? Apologies to put your hands together. Seriously, I want to hear all of it. Here, if you have a milkshake, and I have a milkshake, and I have a straw, and it reaches across the fucking room,

I drink it. I drink your goddamn fucking milkshake. I drink it up, you son of a bitch. You think you're better than me? I had a little there. Here, we'll do it again, okay? It's drainage, Eli. All right?

Okay, we only need to do it again. It's drainage, Eli. All right? All right, Paul gets to go first in the Malton game He gets to pick a category between

I'll use my cranium I hope you don't boggle my mind Monopoly Hungry, hungry hippos Scrambled eggs you don't boggle my mind. Monopoly. Hungry, hungry hippos. Scrambled eggs. We all want to play.

All right. Risky business. You get to pick. You guys are right over there? Remember? All right, they're passing around donuts. No, I don't. Do it quieter.

We're doing Tom Cruise. Right. But games? Risk is the name of our game. Risk is the name of a game. And then Risky Business is a Tom Cruise movie. Yeah, I did a twofer. What if Tom Cruise was in the Hungry Hungry Hippos movie? It would be intense.

He would run from those hippos? That's right. Run from those hippos. You ever seen a shirtless hippo run? Oh, you're presuming he is a hippo. He would play one of the titular Hungry Hungry Hippos. I thought he'd be saving us from the hippos. Oh, hell no. he is a hippo? He would play one of the titular hungry, hungry hippos. I thought he'd be saving us from the hippos. Oh, hell no.

He's a hippo. He is the Gene Kelly of running. That deserves more. Big Gene Kelly. That was a lovely insight. That's it. Paul gets to pick a category. All right.

Between spoiler alert, not of course, is movies where someone is run over by a car. I am DB because I am DB, but also because these are movies that the title is the initials DB. It's two words, and they begin with the letters D and B.

And Meals on Wheels, which, of course course is a movie where there is oral sex in a car. That's clunky. Yeah and nobody picks it because if you can't think

of a movie with oral sex in a car because there really aren't that many I don't think you just move on. Mostly books. Yeah.

Well that makes me think of one, though. It was in both the book and the movie. We all know it. We've read books. IMDb. IMDb. Would you like a movie with the initials DB from 1981?

Or 1997? I'm going to go 1997. All right. This movie, Leonard gives three and a half stars. Fuck. We're going to Ben Blacker next.

So be ready, Blacker. I'm ready. I'll just hang out. I'm ready. Three and a half stars. So be ready, Blacker. I'm ready. And then you, Acker. I'll just hang out. I'm ready. Three and a half stars. Fresh and original, he calls this movie.

Still just gives it the three and a half. Doesn't go to the full four. He says it rings true from start to finish. And that it's based on a memoir. 1997. And he lists 12 names. 1997.

DB. Based on a memoir. It's not Darbor's. The deer... The deer bunter? That, of course, would be T-D-B. You're right. You're right.

How many names, Doug? Twelve? I can name that movie in six names. Name it. Ben Blacker. Ben Blacker just says name it. You've seen my B. Yeah, name it, Paul my B Yeah name it Paul

Hey you can't pile on He's got my back Here's your six names And I'm pretty sure I can pronounce every one of them Oh boy Gretchen Maul Watch me go Val Avery

Brian Maybe not this one No Tarantino. That's not so hard, Tarantino. Zach Grenier. Ooh la la. Gary Becker. There's no other way to pronounce Becker.

Classic DB. And then, this is where I show off. Jelko Ivonek. Oh, I love Jelko. Remember. I shop all the time at Jelko. Dream Burls came out much later. Wow, you're helping somebody

that you're competing against. Paul's a friend. 1997. Mason, a memoir. What were some of the other descriptors? Fresh and original. Rings true from start To finet

Finish Memoir Leonard throws around so many French words Maltine Maltine Hacker I'm in the show Points I'm in the show points

oh shit I don't want to get red lighted on this show wipe wipe wipe based on a memoir obviously it's the story of Dusty Bringfield oh shit so close it's Donnie Brasco Donnie fucking forget aboutnie Brasco. Donnie fucking forget about it, Brasco.

Donnie Brasco, forget about it. Ben Blacker's on the board with one point. Thank you. That movie did ring true. It's from start to finish. It was trash. It's the worst end credits I've ever seen. Ben Acker starts us off. The opening credits delivered on their promise.

Yes. Ben Acker gets to start us off with a category. Then we go to Ben Blacker and then Paul F. Tompkins. Would you like pie? Hold on one second. First you had a chance for donuts. I'm going to shut those people up in the green room. Oh, I love that, thank you so much

They're just loud back there because they're like We do not accept the apology Pie is a movie He's not hearing the categories though He's picking Okay Pie is movies That Leonard gave three stars and listed

14 names Max P. Wilson Suggested Superbad which is superhero High is movies that Leonard gave three stars and listed 14 names. Max P. Wilson suggested Superbad, which is superhero movies that Leonard gave two stars or less. And your third option is Rush. And that's best all the movies named Rush. Oh, my God. Or starring Jeffrey Rush.

I'm getting a call from a guy that only calls when he has something bad to tell me. Answer it. I'm not going to answer it. We'll take it from here. We got the category. Rush is best picture winners. Pie. What was the description of Rush though? Best picture winners

that are under 100 minutes long. It's only happened a few times. All right, Pi. As you know. As I know, of course. Wings, 1927. Do you know how old... Do you know how long Academy Award winning movies are?

That's right. All right, so we're going with Pi. Your year, Ben Acker, is 2007. This movie got three stars from Leonard, as I already mentioned, and he lists 14 names. He says about

it that it's it gleans substantial chortles. Chortles. Is that emphasis yours or his? It gleans substantial chortles. Chortles. Is that emphasis yours or his? It gleans substantial chortles. Chortles. Mr. Popper.

I just can't believe this sentence. Gleans and chortles. It gleans substantial chortles. It has much gleanage of chortles. Have you gleaned of chortle. Have you gleaned my chortle yet? From its ragging

of real life celebrities. Oh, I don't like that at all. This motion picture gets some chortles from ragging. And he also

says about this movie that it never really catches fire. But three stars. Hunger Games catching fire. Did I get it? No pre-guessing.

No pre-guessing. Sorry. Oh, my God. You know how when you have a call come in, you don't take it, and then the amount of time it takes before it pops up saying there's a voicemail message? It just came up. He left a fucking long-ass message. Wow.

I cannot wait to not listen to that message. Play it. I think we should all listen to it. I know what it's about. It's messed up. You know what it's about. I'll tell you what I think it's about. Apologies.

This young lady was genuinely shocked when we said that Her eyes got so big Doug, no The sanctity of the phone It's like a confessional I didn't know it got so dark It gets so dark here

It's a very special Doug Loves Movies Our mutual friend, Paul F. Tompkins, Jack Black, came on my show where you smoke weed for 45 minutes. Getting Doug with hot. He was a really good sport to show up but apparently he's kind of

a pot idol. He certainly used to smoke a lot as a movie and songs about it. He just hasn't smoked for a while because he had a kid and a wife and the whole deal. He just wasn't ready for where marijuana's at right now on my table.

He got too high very quickly and then struggled to remain a guest on the show. He even had a safe word with his wife that he shouted at one point. But he was such a good sport, he stayed through the entire show. But now there's a lot of conversations about taking it off the internet. This has happened more than once. Well, when Matt Walsh did it, he called up and said, can you take it down?

And we said, well, we have advertisers and stuff, so we'd rather not. He says, I'll mention the advertisers if you let me just make an apology video. So now when you click on the show where you think you're going to see Matt Walsh on the show, it's a video of Matt Walsh saying, hey, I had a good time, but I've got a kid, and I don't want to be seen doing that. And he just explains why he had his episode removed. Hold on a second. Everyone going into this knows exactly. Hold on a second. Everyone going into this

knows exactly this is not a surprise. You think that they do, Paul, but publicists are bad at passing along key pieces of information like you're going to get high. Like for some reason,

there is that weird disconnect. Those are the two elements to the show. Jim Jeffries walked in and went, there's weed and cameras? Like, he was shocked by both elements.

Was he surprised you were there? I don't think he knows too many Dougs, so I think we were cool. But anyway, that's what the call is probably about. Can you cut this out? I feel bad about this. We might. I don't know. I think it's continuing to defend that Jack is a great guy

who had good intentions and it didn't go well because he just doesn't smoke anymore and then just suddenly smoked. Taking a break gives you a really good high when you start up again. And I think he probably took a pretty long break. Yeah!

So, but you know, I understand. The watchers of the show understood, but I think when you watch it as a person who's not in the stoner culture, you might be like, oh, that really messed that guy up. Do you know what it's all about, though, really? And I get where he's coming from. If his child sees him freak out,

Jack will lose the upper hand with his child forever. Right. That's the first thing I said to him, is keep your kid away from the Internet for the next, you know, 10, 15 years. Oh, it's worse at age 15. Forget it. How old is this child now?

I don't know. I have no idea. No one knows. It's one of those mysteries. Does it even exist? It's not for me to say. Are you watching Pod Idol this year? Yeah.

Why is the one judge so mean? Right? He should find a way to chill out. That judge should go to the chill out room. For sure. I mean, I've talked about this on the show. As soon as he started kind of freaking out and stopped smoking,

the message board underneath the show on YouTube just lights up with, you know, you're a pussy and shit like that. Oh, nice. It gets really intense. What a fun community. Well, but it's, you know, it's... It's YouTube.

Yeah, exactly. It's like, it's trolls that also smoke weed or maybe even don't and they just want to show up. Can you imagine like a troll that smoked weed? Like his riddles would be crazy. You'd never get across that bridge

unless you smoked weed. Alright, so we've run out of time. 12 names. But we're going to soldier forward. You're welcome. Put your hands together. With whatever was just happening. 12 names, Doug.

Oh, nice. Thanks for keeping track. He says he can get in 12. Out of 14. Out of 14. 2007, I'll take 11, please. He says 11, Paul. I'm going to say, name that movie. 11 names, no problem, Paul.

There might be a problem. He could take the whole thing down right now with the 11 names. Fuck! You're welcome. Take your hands together. Take your hands together. Take your hands together. Let me hands together. Take your hands together. Let me show you how to clap.

Put them in a praying motion. Rapidly. Congratulations, you've applauded. Have you... You're starting to put out fires now. Have you heard that podcast about hostage stories? No, I haven't. Tape your hands together.

Tape your hands together. Some of my medicine fell out on the floor. There was a time in our country when that would have been a major plot point on a sitcom, on a half hour sitcom. We'd have to have a talk with Doug. Like a serious episode, yeah, where that rolled across the floor.

If it was Jack Black, we would have to have a talk with Doug. Like a serious episode, yeah, where that rolled across the floor. If it was Jack Black, we would have to. That we're definitely going to cut. 11 names. Here's your 11 names, Ben Blacker. Good luck. 2007, three stars. You don't need the clues again. Trust me.

Let's go. Rip Torn. Megan Mullally. Easy. Larry Miller. Oh, yeah, everybody. Oprah Winfrey. Poofally. Easy. Larry Miller. Oh, yeah, everybody. Oprah Winfrey. Poof.

Obvious. Sting. What? Ray Liotta. Done. Barry Levinson. Sure. Kathy Bates.

I bet. Chris Rock. Why not? Sean Goodman. Why? Sean Goodman? Yes. Sean Goodman. Thank you. Sean Goodman. Why? Sean Goodman? Yes. Sean Goodman.

Thank you. Well, Sean Goodman would have been a different movie. Yawn Goodman. And Patrick Warburton. Oh. Yeah. The great Patrick Warburton. Can you guess it?

Think. What movies was I in? Oh, putty. Go. Remember? Had a riveting scene with Chris Rock. He was the tick. No, I know who Patrick Warburton is.

Friend of the Thrilling Adventure Hour. It's true. Oh, there you go. Catch it on iTunes. He's probably a voice in everything that has voices. Yes, you have to have one. I can only remember...

I can only remember the title after the colon. Is it... There's no colon in what I'm looking at. Then it's not what I think it is. Is it Captain America World Police? No, it isn't. Why would Sting be in that? Team America?

Team America. Oh. Sting's in that, I think. But the actual celebrities were not in... No, it was just voices, so it wouldn't list Sting as in that, I think. But the actual celebrities were not in... No, it was just voices, so it wouldn't list Sting as being in it. Unless Leonard was really confused. They were all good sports.

I love in that movie how Matt Damon's always like, Matt Damon! It's like completely weird. This movie, though, is also very weird, and it's a motion picture that was called Bee Movie that was brought to us by the great Jerry Seinfeld and featured

featured all those digs on yeah animated movies throw people off every time but there was a bunch of digs at celebrities in this Bee Movie

I guess there is this is a good point pick your battles Bee Movie three stars three stars for Bee Movie three stars for Bee Movie

yeah get Leonard on the phone That'll be movie. Three stars. Three stars for B-movie. Three stars for B-movie? Yeah. Get Leonard on the phone. I want to get him too high. Paul. I'm on the board. Woo! Is not, wait, what, it just happened?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now we go back to that. You threw me off. I can't wait to pick a category. You tricked me. Don't blurt out the actor. You threw me off. By saying that, I thought you were trying to trick me. Don't blurt out the rules like a Sam Levine. I'm sorry. I know he has to get out of here. Don't turn on me. Kim, come on.

Ben Acker gets to go first. This next round has a chance to tie it up for three-way tie. He gets to go first. What did I say? I said gets to go first this next round. Has a chance to tie it up for a three-way tie. He gets to go first. What did I say? I said gets to go first, right? No, you're right. It's the third round. Oh, no, you just went first the last time, too.

Do I ever get to play again? Dude, you just got a point. Dude. Dude. All right. You get to pick a category you're just saying you want the third one? no no thought you were being that cocky

I'll take the third one best pitcher that's Oscar nominated baseball movies or squirrel whisperer suggested purge Anarchy. And that's movies where more than one person has diarrhea.

Movies where more than one person has diarrhea? Yeah, a bunch of people have diarrhea. Or I guess maybe even just two would be more than one. And Party in My Jeans suggested Thanks for the Plug. And that, of course, is movies where somebody dies in a bathtub. And I don't know why I said, of course.

So, which one of those would you like to play, Ben Acker? I guess I'll go with the Di-Hurria one. Classiest way you can say it Two stars from Leonard For this movie from 2011 That has multiple people Suffering from diarrhea He says about this movie

That Oh there's an actress in it It was her final film That's an interesting clue He also says that this movie has slow stretches and detours. Yeah, slow stretches and detours, but plenty of diarrhea. And he lists 13 names. Seven names from the movie.

Which movie? Don't say it. That would have been such a great fake out. Great fake out. How many did you say? He said seven. Yeah. Switch directions.

I like it. Wait, who challenged last time? It was Paul. That's how he won, right? Yeah, it goes to Paul. I can name that movie in negative two names. I just did a spit take

that only worked for the listeners and not the people here because there's no beverages in my mouth. I think it worked for the people you spit on. How many names? Negative two.

There's an elephant in here. Negative two, Paul says. Ben Blacker? I don't think I can do three. Name it, Paul. Alright, you gotta name the movie and the top two billed people in the correct order. Here we go. I would like to say that this movie stars

Kristen Wiig and Maya Rudolph and it's called Bridesmaids. Correct, correct, correct! And it was the final film of Jill Klayberg. What are you, Sam Levine-ing right now? I'm just remembering Bridesmaids. But that's right. Paul F. Tompkins

is our winner! Mic drop! It's been a long time. Everyone's came a long time. Kim Quartz, that's you. Here's all your stuff. I'll just slide it over to you since it's on the floor as well as you.

I mean, there's... Some people sit on the floor. I don't want to make it sound like she's a little lush or something. Oh, wait. One of those was passed. It should not have been passed. The Walter Mitty one. No, but we need the shithead off the back. Get it together.

Get it together, Dana Lilly. And is there shithead on the back of yours there? No, but they just told me there's shit in. Oh, okay. So how should we handle this? All right, I'll point to you when it's time to say it. You have to report to the bursar's office. You could totally sell it.

Do you want to whisper it to Ben Blacker? He can't sell it. Let's whisper it down the lane. Whisper it, yeah. Oh, telephone game. Let's see if it translates properly. Okay, now you have to wait a while and when I point to you, you'll say it. I'm going to be at the...

No, because I'll point to you when it's time to say it and you'll sell it. I'm going to be... I'm going to be in Cincinnati at Go Bananas on October 18th DouglasMovies.com for all my dates deets and links

what do you guys got to plug Thrilling Adventure Hour crossover with Night Vale yes the Welcome to Night Vale crossover is now

available at iTunes and at NightVale.Bandcamp.com and the Thrilling Adventure Hour is coming to New York for New York Comic Con.

We're playing sold-out shows at the Bell House, but I bet you can get tickets if you show up at the door. Yeah, if you squeeze in there somehow. Paul's doing a Dead Authors. With John Hodgman. We're doing an improv show with Scott Adsit and Craig Kowalski. Janet Barney. Mark Evan Jackson. Donald Logue is doing monologues.

Correct. When do all that happen? That all happened next week. That all happened, yes. Go to thrillingadventurehour.com. Or be damned. Those and more. What are the dates?

Like the weekend? They start on the 8th of October. It's all throughout the week. 8, 9, 10, 11. 8, 9, 10, 11, 12. I love it. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12. But take out 1 through 7 from the song.

When you edit this later, I know a lot of people edit this podcast in GarageBand to make it their own personal experience. Edit out my sung numbers 1 through 7. Any other plugs, Paul? Paul F. Tompkins? Do I have other plugs? He must.

The Dead Authors Podcast, check that out if you haven't. You don't have to know about the authors to enjoy it. It's funny people improvising in character. Check it out, stupid people! If you're afraid of how dumb you are, don't be. It finally pays off for you. Just jump in and enjoy it. Oh, and...

And... No, you shut up. It's coming back for a third season. Nice! That many people! God love you. And if you don't have Fusion, and you probably don't, why don't you go to Fusion.net,

and there's full episodes online, and you can see the first two seasons online. Yeah. It's a crazy show. It's me and puppets. It's thanks to Paul F. Tompkins, I crossed something off my bucket list, which was having a conversation with a hot dog.

Always wanted to do that. Where the hot dog finally talked back. Yes. Yes, of course Of course As always Kim Jong Un is a shithead Thought that would get applause or something A pretty Pro North Korea crowd here

And Monsanto Is a shithead And Monsanto!