Doug Loves Movies - Raanan Hershberg, Laurie Kilmartin and Troy Tate guest

Episode Date: September 20, 2021

Doug welcomes Raanan Hershberg, Laurie Kilmartin and Troy Tate to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, screaming baby, sticky seeds with 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies! Hey, hey, hey everybody! My name is Doug. Excuse me, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies, coming to you once again from Are We Open? Are We Closed? Who Knows? with another Homes Alone edition. It's Sunday, September 19th, 2021. And my guests today are Renan Hirschberg, Laurie Kilmartin, and Troy Tate. Hello, everybody.

Good to be here. Hello, glad to be here, too. Thanks for having me. here too thanks for having me yeah thanks for having me too what a polite group all talking one at a time that was like a scene out of the show entourage so let's meet everybody individually and alphabetically starting with returning champ renan hershberg is back hello renan yeah hello thanks thanks for having me i'm excited to be back so where are you now i am uh in astoria uh cat sitting for my uh for my friend oh really yeah um i live in brooklyn but i'm a cat sitting in astoria but i'm also going to be moving to astoria so oh i you can just say I'm in Astoria.

You can just get used to the neighborhood. Are you going to take this cat and make it your own when you move there? I've already made it my own, but yeah, I'm going to take it with me and hope they don't notice. They probably won't. That's what happens. You have a cat sitter for too long. They'll imprint on the cat and then you're just left out in the cold. Yeah, no, she's imprinted.

We're going to have that as good as it gets moment, you know, where the dog has to shoot Jack Nicholson and Greg Kandir. But yeah, she's a cool cat. Yeah. So in the story, I'm still like, I'm finally getting used to the fact that that's Jeff Tate's brother. I really did think that was Jeff Tate playing a character. It's just the same rhythm. It's crazy.

Or is it? I'm like 90% sure it's not, but there's still some uncertainty there. That would be the weirdest prank for us to play to just invent a brother of somebody and then just see

how that goes. That's the whole character. Just a brother who sounds a little like him. Especially if it's played by the actual guy. That's a really bizarre... That's a weird trick to pull on people. I guess I'm just not trusting. Yeah, but thank you for being here and there, Renan,

and also joining us. A constant breath of fresh air in the sewer that is Twitter it's Lori Kilmartin hey Lori hi I think some would say I am the sewer that is Twitter I guess so if you're opposed to progress and just being nice. I'm not nice, but I am trying to dial back my joy when an anti-vaxxer dies of COVID. I mean, I got to say that it's nice that somebody out there is expressing, you know, how a lot of us feel

and also keeping it, you know, it's not a heavy read, your feed. It's just heavy news with a light touch. Sure. I always try to spin death into something delightful. Yeah, and I think it's working, and I appreciate it. And, you know, I just sit back and try not to reply guy to everything that I read, because, you know what I mean? You want to you just want to get in there. It's like it's like dogs and, you know, chasing after things. You just can't help yourself. Like I get when I see replies on my tweets that I don't like, I'm just like, well, that person just could not help themselves.

True. I mean, it's too easy to just do. And and and it's it's such an impulse thing, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I think I did reply to somebody who didn't like something I said. And it just, it turned into a, like a, just a waste, wasteful back and forth. And neither of our minds were changed. So I could have left it alone. Every once in a while I get pulled in. I saw somebody that suggested, you know, that you just, you know,

post something that's going to get people in your comments arguing with each other and don't get involved at all. And then after it's up for a little while, you know, erase the entire thing so that those people arguing will realize, hey, maybe it's not worth our time and trouble because our arguments could just vanish. worth our time and trouble because our arguments could just vanish. But that seems a little cruel to do that on purpose. I think I just do it accidentally every day. But thank you for being here and or wherever you are. And in his second or third appearance on the show, it's really it's there's a huge debate about.

It's his third time. I believe him. It is, in fact, Jeff Tate's brother, Troy Tate. How's it going, man? Excellent. Thanks for having me. I'm glad to be here. As you said, I am, in fact, Jeff's brother. We've been seen in the same place on multiple occasions it's true you were both on the show together uh once in kentucky twice people there oh you were together at ucb also yes well it's nice to have you flying solo and it's also fun to think of your voice as being uh jeff turned on the uh times two uh Just sped up a little bit Yeah right I'm the younger brother So my voice is higher that's how it works

Yeah and you've got a little bit more energy And lung capacity And I'm certainly glad to be here Not facing Jeff because I stand no chance of defeating him So I gotta like my chances Today Your chances are definitely better but these are some

Strong competitors I gotta say well and and also uh guesswork is gonna play off for uh somebody uh if you ask me um but before we get to the games portion of the show let's visit recommendation nation that's where each one of you recommends just one movie. And we'll start with returning champion Renan Hirschberg. What's what would you like to recommend today? I'll recommend this movie, this Swedish movie called Borders. Have you seen that? Oh, I have not seen it.

Tell me more. It's a really insane, insane movie. It's hard. I don't want to like, it's hard to explain it, but like it's on Hulu and everyone I've recommended to either loved it or like was legitimately mad at me for recommending it. So it's either way it's open to dialogue. But why the, what the anger is from, like, is it violent? It's not violent. It's kind of gross. It's about this woman who's like deformed and she works as a security guard

and she, but they don't explain why she's deformed. And then she meets another guy who's like deformed in the same way. They both kind of look like dogs a little surreal. And then they start having a romance, but it all, it's really brilliant. It all gets explained. It's the kind of thing where it seems really surreal, but then once you get the information, it's actually a very literal story. So it's just a really cool, it's a really great movie.

And it's definitely called borders or is there a chance it's called border? There's a big, especially since you're correcting me, I think there's probably a big hundred percent chance it's just called border. Or border collie? Yeah. probably a big 100 chance it's just called border or border collie yeah i think it was i think it was nominated for best foreign film a year or two ago um and i think it's called just border but i'll confirm that later and put the right title down also i just looked it up real quickly um oh you cheater you're already cheating i looked i didn't look up that i looked

up the troy tate thing even though i was the only one suspicious it is his brother um the only witness to the two of them together is the third tape brother that's what disturbed oh we don't talk about him yeah uh what were you gonna say renan um no it was just uh yeah uh what's it called uh border you know it's a real bicycle thief bicycle thieves type situation but uh it's my nerdiest film joke but uh yeah so it's a great hey hang on a second can you back up because i just i just this very day saw in print the words the bicycle thieves and thought why doesn't it say bicycle thief i've always thought it was bicycle thief so you're telling me that it is a known thing that it has more than one title i believe i'll probably get fact checked by someone even more uh pretentious than me but like I believe it's bicycle thieves in Italian. It's plural, right? Technically two bicycle thieves. Right.

And then I think it got into the singular and in the translation just because that's more, you know, the bicycle thief, it feels like a sexy American action movie. Yeah. I buy, I buy all of this and and we're going to call, we're going to call the movie just Border. All right. But it's on Hulu. And I really did intend to watch it because I try to watch everything

that gets nominated for an Oscar in every category. I succeeded last year. It's so good. And it's like a real, like, you're going to want to talk about it afterwards. It's a real conversation starter. Yeah. I heard good things. Like you're going to want to talk about it afterwards. It's a real like it's a real conversation starter. Yeah, I heard good things. But, you know, it also looks like a nap starter also. No, no, it's not.

It's honestly not. I mean, that's the fear for every foreign film. It's honestly it's the opposite. It's so weird. The whole time you're like, what the fuck? It's like more disturbing and gross than. OK, I think it's good, right? That's gross than boring. Which I think is good, right? That's better than boring.

I don't know. I don't know how I feel about gross. I don't intentionally do anything that's gross. You're not going to fall asleep. Yeah, okay. But don't eat anything dirty. You don't know how good I am at sleeping. I've been on too many long flights. Well, you're going to have some fucked up dreams then. You know, I'm so used to sleeping while there's motion if there's an earthquake that makes me i go into a deeper sleep it doesn't wake me up it puts me into a deeper slumber

to fall asleep eventually yeah all right so uh the border is renan's recommendation laurie kilmartin what would you like to recommend today? I would like to recommend this movie I've watched a couple of times over the years. It's called The White Ribbon. And I think it's directed by this Austrian guy. But it takes place in pre-World War I Germany. And it sort of explores small town life and extreme patriarchy and abuse.

And it kind of shows you how the seeds were planted for what Germany became in the 20s and then ultimately in the 40s. The White Ribbon. Yeah. Also subtitles. Yeah. Also, subtitles? Yeah. Hello? Hello? That answer was in subtitles.

Yeah. Does it have subtitles? It's got subtitles? Oh, yeah. It does have subtitles. Yeah. Oh, I forgot. You actually need to learn German to...

Oh, no. Yes no what a terrible recommendation but at least you can also enjoy mine comps without i do have an english-speaking recommendation too if you guys don't want to learn german oh wait that's not mine conf wasn't a movie, but was there a movie based on Ryan Conf? There was a documentary that Woody Allen was always talking about. Maybe Ryan, right? Yes, that's it. The White Ribbon. All right. This sounds like

it's really a roller coaster of recommendations so far. Like people sit down and watch those two in one sitting might also want to do it on a day when they're, you know, when they're going to see their therapist. I don't trust any comedian that recommends a comedy. Like every comedian I know watches just really depressing, dark stuff. Yeah. And laughs at it. Those are the comedies.

Like my good friend, Troy Gallion, he, he consists that movie. The lobster is hilarious. And I find a couple of moments kind of amusing, but for the most part, it's horrifying. I broke up with someone cause they liked that movie. And I hate it so much. I think, did we talk about this before, Renan? It's like my least favorite movie

I love this I love this because Troy and I We seriously used to argue, the other Troy We used to say Trey I do this all the time with Trey and Troy Those two names are Interchangeable to me And I apologize

But Troy and I He thinks that movie is a laugh riot and he even watched it once on the plane and was laughing the whole time that's because he's a sociopath yeah that is yeah because he's like i'm like what's so funny about it he's like well what happens to the dog is funny it's animal cruelty it's awful of your mind i hate i hate the cruelty to animals in it like it just it's bad yeah and the cruelty to john c riley's hand and the cruelty to the audience the cruelty to me yeah it's an insane movie i mean i've grown to really appreciate olivia coleman as an actress since that movie because i've seen her in so many things since then and know who she is. And she's amazing in that movie, but only in making it creepier.

I just like movies with like humanity. And that movie is like anti-humanism. It's just like everyone talk on a tone and like, it's, it's just about ideas. I don't know. I just, I hate that kind of movie so much. Well, it's already about about humans when your lead is Colin Farrell. By the way, Trey has to give the most lowbrow answer now to offset his

his recommendation has to be Joe Dirt. Just yeah. I messed you up because I'm Troy. I'm Troy. up because it's troy i'm troy i like though it's not it kind of feels good to me that someone named renan is having trouble it's cool i'll answer to either one it's cool i'm fine i'm on you Jeff. I hope that's okay.

Yeah. That'll work too. Jeff, Trey, Troy, what is your recommendation? I'm going to recommend the funniest movie I've ever seen. It's called the lobster. I'm breaking up with you now. I'm just kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. No, I'm'm gonna really get this roller coaster moving i recommend a movie called maximum risk i just watched this one a few days

ago um i love a movie that uh forces the viewer to really shift their perspective and see the world through someone else's eyes and but i also love a movie that stars Jean-Claude Van Damme. And this one is the latter. And boy, oh boy. This one is peak Jean-Claude Van Damme. There's so much broken glass in this film. People's faces and entire bodies are flying through windows the whole time. There's a few interesting elevator scenes.

I think it was a really interesting directorial choice made by the filmmaker, like fun elevators. There are like three different ones show up in the movie. The one's a freight elevator. One's the kind that you can like see out of. And yeah. And Jean-Claude van damme fights a giant russian guy while wearing a towel they're both they're both wearing towels in a bathhouse and uh that's all they have on and they don't neither of them lose their towel wow where can i find this yeah You can watch it on Netflix. Also, no spoiler, Jean-Claude Van Damme

dies immediately in the first scene. Okay? But it's not a spoiler. Because it turns out he has a twin brother that he never knew about. That sounds like just two spoilers. Right? But it all happens right away.

So neither of them are spoilers and uh yeah but the movie's called maximum risk not dead twin like i still feel like that's a spoiler officially well look if you if you google this movie at all the first line in the description says he dies right away yeah well that's why i don't read reviews or Google things. It's not a spoiler, Doug. Trust me, OK? The part about the broken glass is more of a spoiler. All right.

That's true. That's a giveaway that a lot of glass is in danger throughout the film. Did people have the appropriate amount of cuts that one gets from broken glass or yeah it's back pretty they get all bloodied up it's oh it's rated r great it's hilarious yeah it's rated r all right sure um yeah it's gotta be if you see if there's blood you know that's the bloodless fighting that gets the pg-13 oh and uh in english the entire time okay no reading required so there's not well then i will not be watching it yeah i mean it sounds like we've got a real battle of the uh the esoteric

versus uh jean-claude van dam. Where does this one rank, Troy, in the history of Van Damme movies? Because clearly you're a fan. You're a fan-dam. It's no hard target. It's definitely no time cop, but it's up there. It's up there with those, okay. Yeah, I would put it in the upper echel's up there with those. Okay. Yeah. It's, I would,

I would put it in, in the upper echelon of the Van Damme movies. I mean, this is probably a huge Van Damme spoiler, but I'm going to ask anyway, what two objects does he use in this film to do the splits? What two things are his feet on when he's doing the splits? He does no splits in this movie.

I know. Yeah. It's inexplicable. Maximum artistic risk. So that's, that's a big spoiler too. Okay. Yeah.

I know everybody's, I know everybody's waiting for it the whole time, but it never happens. I can't believe that he didn't do it maybe there's like uh you sure there's not like outtakes over the end credits there is nothing over the end credits but i wasn't watching the director's cut so there might be all kinds of splits in there it'd be funny if just you saw jean-claude van damme where he never did that but then at the end of the movie instead of outtakes they just play him in every situation he was in the movie doing it just just for the you know just in case yeah just to have it let's get one split shot

while we got the camera rolling yeah and then he watches a movie and he's so upset that none of them made it in. He's like, are you kidding me? Let's just do a reel of all of them at the end and send everybody home happy. That's what I used to love about Jackie Chan movies is how

every time he got injured, they'd show the injury, how it happened and putting him into an ambulance, the whole thing, they'd show it in the, you know, the end credits. So every injury and every mistake they put in the credits, you see how how he just how terribly he treated himself. I can't believe that guy is still alive. He's he's crazy. still alive he's he's crazy um those are great recommendations it's going to be a real good battle between these three on the douglas movies twitter account and we're going to begin playing some games with these terrific guests right after this break we'll be right back we are back and while we are in the break Jean Claude Van Damme put one foot

on a stack of books and the other on a Chrysler and did the splits this is just him around the house is that what he's famous for? he's got a lazy set

is he famous for the splits really? I think he's done it like in four of his movies he has he didn't do it in time cop i don't think time cop time cop is the iconic one oh that's the best one yeah he jumps on the floors electrified and he has to jump on the kitchen counter oh yes the kitchen counter yeah and he always wearing like hammer pants too, while he was doing the splits. Was that a thing? He's got to have pretty, pretty loose pants. He's definitely got these guys, if not hammer pants, he's got something where it's been let out a little bit in the cross and

breathing room in there for sure. Yeah. Yeah. He can't be splitting your pants every time you do that. You know, he's on his way to a fancy meal or something. He can't have a big crotch split. But, all right, well, Troy, if I ever do need an expert on Jean-Claude Van Damme, I'm coming to you because you just really seem to know your stuff. I'm the guy. Yeah, you're the man.

But for now, we're going to play a game that I call ABCD's Nuts. This game, it's easy and peasy. I name a letter, you name a movie that begins with that letter, and you stay in the game. It's that simple. You'll even know which letter we're about to go to next because we're going to spell in honor of the Moon Tower Comedy Festival starting on Wednesday, which I'm going to be doing Doug Loves Movies at at Antone's in downtown Austin, Texas,

this Wednesday night, September 22nd. But if you match me and name the movie that I wrote down ahead of time, based on a theme that you might figure out as we go, then you win the game automatically. It's confusing when I say it all fast like that, but it should come together. So we're spelling Moon Tower. So the first letter's M and we'll go uh alphabetically

and with our champion uh renan hershberg uh yeah name any movie begins with m i'll just go with the movie m which is the letter m there is a movie just called that. Yeah. The, um, Fritz Lang old movie. Um, Oh yeah. Yeah. Super old. Yeah. But it's very, very old killer. He turns out to be no spoiler, but he turns out to be a killer at the end. All right. Well, that's a, yeah. I like, I like to you keeping it, uh, you know, you're, uh, keeping it real film school. Yeah. I'm, I'm pretentious today. So I'm just got to lean in at this point. Hey, battleship pretension.

Yeah, so that's the name of a troupe that makes fun of movies, I think. OK, so I went with a motion picture just coincidentally. It's not the theme. It's not all movies that I'm in, but it is a movie that i do happen to appear in called mr roosevelt that's my m so the next letter moon tower is o so we move to laurie just name any movie that begins with o especially if you think it fits a theme with a movie called mr roosevelt uh on golden pond because henry fondo was uh alive during fdr's term that's true that's true uh that's not what i put down i picked a movie called office space uh yeah yeah uh so we got mr roosevelt office space and the next o goes to to roy tate why did troy why did you get the like alliteration with the troy tate and then just you know jeff tate why didn't they name him like tommy tate or timmy tate our first our first names were uh they our parents admitted at one point they just winged it uh

and so uh jeff they got from uh some local television host where we were born and troy came from the uh neighbor kid who lived across the street so nobody put that much thought into either of our names were the neighbors mad when your parents came home with a second troy for the block i don't think they knew um i never i never met them so i don't know but so it never became like a thing where the neighborhood they had to have old troy and young troy no no no we we moved way too much for that but they totally did bite their style and uh you're right lori they should have been mad i like the idea i like the idea of naming your children after someone you don't really know like just an acquaintance like i just named him after my mailman you know i like i like not going

with you know parents or grandparents. Why did you name your kid mailman? Well, I named him after him. Well, I wanted to name him my mailman, but I didn't know his name. I didn't decide, just mailman. All right. So Troy, I'm sorry I interrupted you with all that name talk, but what's for the next, Oh, what would you go with? All right. I'm going to, the next O, what would you go with? Alright, I'm going to stick with the theme

and go with Office Christmas Party. Oh. That is so close. So very close. Because I got to be honest with you here. I couldn't think at this time I couldn't think of another

O movie that fit the theme I wanted to do. So I just wrote Office Space again. Oh, damn. Yeah. So, yeah, I just couldn't think of any other O's. But that was a good guess. N is the next letter back to Ronan.

And so it's a theme between office space and office space and Mr. Roosevelt. That's a movie about that's the theme so far. What's that? Is that a movie about, no, it's not about FDR. It's about the cat named Mr. Roosevelt. And the tradition of how Troy describes Jean-Claude Van Damme movies. It's about the cat dies at the beginning of the movie ah and then it's about things that the complications of uh sharing a dead cat there's a twin cat or is that a spoiler no i'm just saying that you know people could have gone to

the movie not even knowing that mr roosevelt's a cat but i've i've ruined it um okay well i don't really so i'll just guess maybe i don't really know the theme for those two but uh let's see um and uh notorious yeah no i mean yes down is a movie called Nadine. Tim Basinger. Okay. Yeah. Is it set in an office? What's that? Is it set in an office? Nadine in an office? I don't think so. I think Nadine's like a you know, a violent love triangle

situation or abused wife or something. I think it's based on the song Jolene. a violent love triangle situation or abused wife or something. Ah, cool. I think it's based on the song Jolene. T is the next letter for Lori. Wow. This really opens it up because every movie that begins with the

is a T movie. I'm torn between The Piano, a Jane Campion film from 1993 and the the hunt for red you're on i'm gonna go with the piano okay uh i picked a movie called thunder road written and directed by a former guest on the show, Jim Cummings. Wow. Next letter is to Troy, and it's the letter O. Ken. Yeah, there's three O's in Moontown.

I'd be stupid not to say office space here. I'm going to say that. See, that's the problem is by this point, I did think of a movie. I mean, it's only two letters later, Doug. I thought of it. How fast does your mind work? It just took me a while, and then I realized that another very offensive theme is called Outlaw Blues.

It was from 1977, starred Peter Fonda. He passed away a year or two ago, I think. So now where are we at? Oh, W. W. Oh, this is an exciting one because if you figure out the theme, you have a real good chance of getting this because I've written down two titles for W. So it's a special double bonus. Who's up next for non.

I think it's me, but I have no idea what the, what the theme is from this stuff. So, so I guess I'm just going to say a water ship down. How did you figure out the theme was dead rabbits is that what it is every one of these movies no no uh the theme's not that specific um i went with you could have said whip it the roller derby movie directed by drew barrymore or a waking life which is one of those uh animated you know what do they call it rotoscoping uh of uh you know they film the actors first then they animate it and uh waking life is what that was called yeah oh yeah which was uh okay i think i know the theme now i think i think he

might but it's uh what good is that gonna do you because you're really got two letters left a little too late he's the next letter for lori uh what do you think it is lori i you know i i um the coming up with a theme is so uh it's it's so much higher above what I'm capable of right now, which is just remembering the names of movies. I can't reach the moon and try to come up with a theme. Um, so E I would, I would, uh, pick Edward Scissorhands. Oh, okay. I thought you were going to say E.T. as long as you were, uh, heading to the moon. But, uh, but yeah, Edward Scissorhands is a good one.

I went with Renan. Do you think you know what I went with? It's also a Richard Linklater movie, and it's called Everybody Wants Some. Oh, yeah. With two exclamation points. That's like the official title, like the nerve. He demanded two?

Somebody did. That's insane. I mean, I always find one hilarious, like that movie Mother. It's so funny that it has an exclamation point. Well, what is two? Is that like, everybody wants some? Yeah. I thought it was a gentler movie than that. I didn't two? Is that like everybody wants some? Yeah. I thought it was

a gentler movie than that. I didn't know it was that aggressive. Oh, man. They're a bunch of baseball players. That's kind of where I checked out on that one. Also such a calm, understated director. He is not the director you think would demand an exclamation mark. Yeah. School of Rock didn't have one.

Yeah. A studio lacking confidence in the movie. So they really want to, you know, give it everything they can. But it just seems so half-assed because if you really, you know, in life, if you go one exclamation point or three, when do you ever do two? Right. Yeah, that's a good point. Three or one.

What's two? Two is like you're trying to be excited, but then halfway through you don't give a shit. Like you give up in the middle of being excited. It needs to be three or one. No good. Alright, we're down to the last letter. And Troy

gets to be the hero or the zero. Wait, wait, wait. Those are my only options yeah i'm sorry this either is going to prove that you're great or that you stink i mean i'm i'm on to the theme but i got nothing but all right yeah it's a tough one it's impossible say run ronnie run just for the alliterative nature of it there it's every word of the title begins with r so i'm happy with my answer okay that's uh i'm glad you're satisfied and uh i went with

a motion picture called redheaded stranger that uh starred willie nelson and was filmed as all of these were at least partially but mostly completely in austin texas right of course it's all austin texas movies i realized um but also realized i didn't know which movies were filmed. Yeah. I was hoping office space would come up again. Once you know it, it doesn't really help that much. Yeah. It's a, it's a tough theme as it is and, and a tough game, but it's always,

it's fun when, when somebody does match. So thank you everybody everybody, for trying. And I'm going to designate. You didn't officially win that game, Renan, but you are going to go first in our next game because we'll just keep the alphabetical order thing going. And don't forget, everybody, Douglas Movies is at the Moon Tower Comedy Festival

starting Wednesday nights, 10 or 22nd. And then there's another one on Saturday afternoon, the 25th at four 20 and we'll play our next game right after this break. We'll be right back. All right, we're back. And I get giggly when I play this game because there's a TV show that I enjoy a great deal called Family Feud and I have

stolen their format for a game that I call Filmily Feud. It's like Family Feud but you each play for yourselves. You don't have your family and it's also multiple choice. You just have to pick the answer that got the highest percentage

in my Twitter poll. Renan's going to go first, and we're going to do three rounds, so each of you will get a chance to go first. And if there's a tiebreaker, then the person who went first the first time will get to go first. That's too much. I didn't need to say that. Cross that bridge when we get to it. I like all the rules.

Yeah. All the rules in advance Radon then after he picks one then Laurie gets to pick one and then Troy gets to pick here we go who now this is according to I just

did a poll on Twitter people responded I don't know their motivations I don't know these people Now this is according to I just did a poll on Twitter People responded I don't know their motivations I don't know these people Okay I said who has the best hair piece In show business And then their options were

Tom Cruise Zac Efron Jason Momoa Or Brad Pitt? I listed four people that are famously known for pretty much having their own hair.

I'd go with Jason Momoa. You're going Momoa? I'm going Momoa. Okay. So that leaves you're going Momoa I'm going Momoa okay so that leaves for Laurie that leaves Cruz Efron or Pitt oh

none of them have quite as long a hair as Jason Momoa well I would say because he has long hair he's really he's like trying too hard to make it seem like it's his where Tom Cruise he has long hair he's really he's like trying too hard to make it seem like it's his um where tom cruise uh uh i'm gonna say i'm gonna say tom cruise i'm gonna say i i bet he's he's been bald since uh risky business

oh you think it's fake hair yeah i bet that's what you meant by hairpiece oh you said that piece oh fuck i didn't even miss that part i thought you just said best hair my oh no my answer is the same but whose fake hair is so great that it's fooling everybody except for the people that answered these names in this poll i would never have guessed Momoa. No one has a long hair piece. That's just a wig. Renan was voting for senior superlatives. Fuck. I thought you said good hair. I missed the piece part.

All right. Well, you know, if there's, you know, whatever answers left over at the end here, you can trade Momoa for that if you want to. That's fair. All right. So but Laurie grabbed up Tom Cruise and then Troy between Zac Efron and Brad Pitt. Which one do you want?

Well, Laurie took my answer. So, between these two, I'm going to have to go with Zach Efron. All right. Now, would you like to switch to Brad Pitt or stick with Jason Momoa? Well, they're both, I think, going to be wrong, but I think Brad Pitt is less wrong. So I guess I switch to Brad Pitt. Between the lesser of two evils, I choose Brad Pitt.

Yeah. Okay. Here we go. Here we go. The person with the least amount of votes, 18% of the votes, which is worth 18 points, is Brad Pitt. You only get 18 points for that.

I went most wrong. Fuck. Most wrong. Yeah, you went in the wrong direction, unfortunately. Then coming in at 19%, with 19 is zach efron so trey you have 19 points you're scant one point ahead of renan and then with a whopping 38 percent uh laurie gets 38 points for tom cruise wow i wish you guys could see my arms raised right now. You're so excited. And Jason Momoa managed to get more than Zach or Brad. He has 25%.

Wow. So he's really been fooling everybody because he's had that long hair from the second I first ever heard of him. That is the way to have a convincing hairpiece by, you know. Just have it from the beginning. Yeah. Long hair guys get away with it.

They just put a little extra up front. Like what if Howard Stern was all just fake hair? Yeah. Oh, so my lawyers tell me I have to say this. That last game was all alleged. They all allegedly have great hair pieces. You know, Momoa is married to Lisa Bonet and she's been in the business

since she was a little girl. So I feel like she coached him early on. Like she saw the bald spot and was like, let me let's get this fixed immediately before you even get famous. Yeah. And she's got great hair too. So like she probably just shares her hair. He's probably just shares her hair he's probably

just got her extensions in his head the family hair yeah sure yeah all right well the uh you know people with their opinions they all uh people vote it cracks me up that people have picked between those all those guys that i think all have their real hair, but who knows? So, like I said, Laurie's in the lead, but anything could happen in round two. But Laurie gets to go first in round two. Then we'll go to Troy and then Renan. Laurie, I asked very similar, another question about these male actors. I said, in your opinion opinion who is the tallest now these people could have gone and looked up the correct answer and came back and chose that but i want to know in

their opinion who is the tallest and the options are again tom cruise this time this time tom is This time, Tom is joined by Vin Diesel, Danny DeVito, and Pete Dinklage. Oh, all right. I'm going to leave Pete and Danny to the other guys if they want to go with those two. So it's really down to Vin Diesel and Tom Cruise. And I'm going to say Vin Diesel because i don't think he's uh over 510 but i think he's definitely over five six okay all right interesting what do you think, Troy? My opinion of the remaining three,

my impression is Tom Cruise is the tallest, so I will take him. Okay. I like it. I'm like a logical player. That was a long pause for something with all the for something yeah all the other people on the planet i thought maybe he was conferring with jeff you know is jeff there feeding your answers no he he exited the room we does he ever feed you have you ever uh broke both your arms he has he has fed me before, yes.

Yeah, okay. He never answers. Renaud. Man, it's really sexy to last on this one. I guess, I mean, between the lesser of two people here is, I mean, I think Danny DeVito is probably like

a giant compared to Pete, I assume, so I'm going to go with Danny DeVito. Yeah, you're going DeVito is probably like a giant compared to Pete, I assume. So I'm going to go with Danny DeVito. Yeah, you're going DeVito. That's interesting. I mean, this is just people. Wait, I can't pick the other options, right? I have to pick the leftovers, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're going to go first on this. Or you went first the first round. I'm not saying they're leftovers. They're great. But you did say that. Don't cancel me. You made the best choice with what you had left. Yes.

Yeah. You never know what you're going to luck into with these games because I try to keep things tricky. And this one certainly did turn out rather weird. If Dillage is the tallest, I'll be very shocked. I would say he's done some real false advertising. Well, I don't know if any of you saw Avengers Endgame. Oh, yeah, where he's a giant yeah but he does play a giant in that film

uh so people could be confused that's true yeah he has a lot of definitely confused people are definitely confused because coming in with 10 of the vote in who is the tallest is tom cruise ouch what yeah yeah yeah he's five seven in reality but uh in our poll not very tall shorter than peter dinklage yeah that's our that's the reality we live in right now yeah well that's what happens when you try to compare yourself to an acting giant wrong information has really destroyed this country. In my opinion, Peter Dinklage is taller. Everyone's opinion is valid.

This is why no one takes the vaccine. We have no... You did your research. Some people refuse to answer the poll because they want to do more research. They're going to get back to me if they're still alive in a few years um all right so uh so that means that uh troy got 10 points for that one and then uh next in line is uh peter dinklage got 20% of the vote. And then Danny DeVito got 27%. So Radon gets 27 points.

But hell no. Vin Diesel, he won the poll with 43% of reasonable people who figured out that he probably is the tallest one. Rich get richer over here, right? Yeah, so Lori is really running away with this thing. So good luck, fellas

on this last round. We've got one round left. And we're going to start with Troy. Good, finally. Good. Finally. I asked Twitter. I thought of four actresses, and I asked Twitter, who makes the best Bloody Mary?

Is it Nicole Kidman, Regina Hall, Regina King, or Melissa McCarthy? This is a good question. I love Bloody Marys. I love making them too. Nicole Kidman, Regina Hall, Regina King, and Melissa McCarthy are my choices. I'm going to go with Melissa McCarthy.

You think she makes the best one? I would take her Bloody Mary, Sight Unseen any day of the week. Oh, wow. I don't care if it's brunch time or not. I'm having a Bloody mixed by Melissa McCarthy. Well, three of these actresses are in this show, Nine Perfect Strangers. I've been watching on whatever service it's on.

Yeah. Is it good? Hulu, I think. And then the other one, the other Regina's director of One Night in Miami and also a great actress. What do you think, Renan? I guess I'll go with hmm i mean nicole kimmon doesn't seem like she'd make bloody mary she seems more of like um i don't mimosa type you know um i guess i'm really

thinking a lot about this um wait it's regina hall and regina king yeah i don't know who regina hall is so i guess she's out because i don't know who that is so i guess i'll go with regina king okay interesting and laurie that leaves you either nicole kidman or Regina Hall? You know, I think before Kidman hooked up with Keith Urban, now sober, she probably made a good

Bloody Mary. So I guess I'm going to have to go with Regina Hall. Find your instincts on this one. Habitaging here. All right. This is going to be really close. This is exciting. Let's see here. Okay. 70 something. All right. Well, we got a clear winner, but it seemed like it was going to be close

just because there's math involved. But you got a whopping 39% from Melissa McCarthy, Troy, so nice comeback. She was the winner? She came up with the most. She would make

the best Bloody Mary, according to my.... She would make the best Bloody Mary. Of course, her garnish would be out of this world. That's really the focal point of a Bloody Mary. Yeah, I just think she's always terrific. But then, next to mine, maybe because she's a director, she knows how to put things, take all the ingredients and put them together. But yeah, Regina King got 32%. Hell yeah.

Yeah. Again, Renan, nice last minute comeback because, Laura, you picked the person who only got 9% of the vote, and Nicole got 20%. Well, those people are wrong. Definitely

Hall over Kidman. And I wasn't going to pick Regina King, but Renan stole her from me. You know what? Even though I got last on this one, I stand behind my thoughts. Also, that was all you needed

to do to secure the win. You are the winner today. Congratulations. Where's my fun whistle? Here it is. You did it. You get to do your plugs first. would you like to plug laurie oh i have a an album coming out at the end of october called corset and i recorded it in november of 2019 there's no mention of covet on the album um and there's a huge chunk about me

uh hoping my mom dies and And she ultimately did of COVID. So you can listen to me possibly forecasting or foreshadowing the events of 2020. Yeah, it's probably a very interesting listen at this time. Maybe. Ah, and hilarious too, we should say. It's got jokes. It does.

But you know, when you record an album, by the time you record it, you hate every joke that's on it because you took a long time to perfect it. So that's what it was and am now. And so I just hope people like it more than i do and you hope that people don't shout out for for bits from it in your future shows you're moving on shout out the punchline when they shout for jokes like they shout out oh yeah

so they absolutely they always say the part that like is just gives the whole thing away. Yeah. Yeah. You're you're perfectly constructed castle. They just like they just pull the bricks out from the bottom. Yeah. Renan Hirshberg. Another great appearance. Thank you for being here. What's your plug today? I want to real quickly plug Lori because I'm at cat seating and her book is on the shelf right here. Dead People Don't Suck.

Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. Great book. Check it out. And I, you can, I have the only other movie podcast besides Doug's called Joe and Ron on talk movies with Joe list. You can subscribe to that. And I also have a special, I'm going to be coming out of this fall.

I also don't have COVID jokes, but only cause I don't write new material. No, I'll have some COVID jokes, but it's going to come out this fall, but subscribe to YouTube. I haven't filmed it yet. So it's probably presumptuous to say a date but subscribe to my youtube channel uh so like people watch it so it's r-a-a-n-a-n last name hershberg my youtube channel right on and troy t i i hate to bring this up because renan just said he's got the only other movie podcast. Surprise, surprise, surprise. Renan, there's a third podcast about movies. Uh-oh.

Co-host one with my brother, Jeff, who is real. And our other brother from another mother, Trey Galleon, who does not have the same name as me. Right. It's called Trey and Troy., it's called rough drafts. We do fantasy style drafts of movies every week, new episodes every Sunday, uh, follow us at rough draft cast on Twitter and, uh, vote,

vote for who you think drafted the best team every week. I think that Jeff and Trey should switch names, trade names. Because then it'll be Trey and Troy Tate and Jeff Gallion. It's already confusing enough, Doug. And it's called Rough Drafts, That was the name of it, right? Rough drafts. Yeah. We talked all about movies. We were, we were the second movie podcast. And yours is the third. Congratulations on being the third.

What happened? How did that happen? Well, the original movie podcast douglas movies is coming to miami at the improv endoral on saturday december 18th at 4 20 lots of douglas movies tapings and stand-up shows uh that hopefully won't be canceled or postponed can be found at douglovesmovies.com laurie kill martin since you won today uh would you be uh interested and you don't have to answer right now but you have the option of appearing again with us as returning champion on the next zoom show after i get back from moon tower which we record uh i think like two weeks from today so keep that in mind yes yes and uh yeah hopefully we'll uh you know we will have you back and um

at the end of every episode i should just say one more time. Thank you to Troy Tate and Renan Hirshberg and Laurie Kilmartin. And I do a closing line from a different movie. A lot of times it's classic movies, but this one, nobody is ever going to figure out what it is. So I'm just going to say it's from a movie called September Affair from 1950. As always,

from 1950. As always, passengers for flight 201 for Rio de Janeiro and Buenos Aires will please go aboard. Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess

makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you Cause Doug loves movies!