Doug Loves Movies - Ralph Garman, T.J. Miller, and Andy Wood Guest

Episode Date: April 7, 2011

Doug welcomes actor/broadcaster Ralph Garman to the show, along with fan-favorite T.J. Miller and comedian Andy Wood. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, greenie babies, sticky seeds With 50 azopop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Hey everybody Hey everybody My name is Doug and I love movies This is Doug Loves Movies Coming to you on April 5th

2 Oceans 11 In front of a live Crowd That's not really the right word for it A live 90 or so people At the UCB Theater In Los Angeles crowd might be, that's not really the right word for it, a live 90 or so people at the UCB Theater in Los Angeles, but 90 people who waited in line

outside, and I appreciate that. Since with last we spoke, I had a great show in Charlotte, North Carolina. The Leonard Maltin game was played and audience member Justin beat Graham Elwood on the movie Fear. The category was Reese Witherspoon movies.

Also had a lot of fun at the University of Central Oklahoma. And I'm looking forward to going back to Oklahoma City on June 28th to Ocean's Eleven. The next Benson Interruption in L.A. happens on April 13th at Largo. Plus I've got shows coming up in Pensacola, Florida, New Orleans, San Francisco, Sacramento, Eugene, Oregon, Buffalo, New York, and Toronto, Canada. All of my tour dates are listed at Douglovesmovies.com. And for those asking, yes, Simon Pegg did qualify for the Tournament of Championships. A little golf applause for that.

But we already had nine qualifiers for the next tourney, so he is an alternate or will be participating in the one after that. Yeah, they're backing up on the runway. It's very exciting. Just a quick note, I haven't seen the movie Hop,

but I'm thinking I'm thinking if the expression fucking like bunnies is ever used in the movie that would be inappropriate for children so I hope I hope they kept it I don't know why I don't know why I said that

but I was thinking about how rabbits like to fuck and there's a children's movie out right now about a rabbit Who at least in the commercials Looks like he wants to get it on with a human lady Alright my guests tonight Are three dudes Who may or may not have met one another

Until just a few minutes ago Backstage this evening It's a smorgasbord of comedy fun and the three of them will get to know each other right here in front of your eyes and or ears please welcome ralph garman andy wood and tj miller Hey guys Hey Mr. B That's TJ

Hey everyone And Andy is using Just waving Hello As a way of saying hello That's Andy And then we have Ralph down there. Ralph, we just did

and you always do Kevin and Bean's morning show, but we did the Kevin and Bean's April Foolishness at the Gibson Amphitheater last Saturday and that was a blast. And you crushed it, by the way. Congratulations. Thank you very much. We're beloved. Following Steve-O

was not easy. He got up on a table and set himself on a fire and did a flip. He set himself on a fire? There was a fire and he set himself upon it? Yeah. That's insanity. Well, how else is he going to catch fire if he doesn't set himself on a fire? That's true.

And then he flipped through the air, and they had told him not to do a fire stunt? They requested strongly that he not set himself on fire, yes. Yeah, the fire marshals at the Gibson Amphitheater, they're not screwing around. They told me I couldn't set myself. They told every act, do not set yourself on fire. Oddly enough, they asked Ray Romano to set himself on fire. Well, do something, Ray.

You are so boring. No, I'm joking around. He's hilarious. Slow burn. Ray is turning over. No, no, Ray. You are so boring. No, I'm joking around. He's hilarious. It's slow burn. Ray is turning over in his grave right now. I'm a certain age. Deborah. I'm putting you out.

That's how he says the name of his show. I'm a certain age. Certain age. Is that Marvin the Martian or Ray Ramone? How dare you, sir? Heaven's a Murgatroyd. I declare this planet in the name of men of a certain age. Isn't that lovely?

So, Ralph, you also do a podcast with Kevin Smith. I do. The beloved Kevin Smith. Hollywood Babylon, it's called. We do it out of the John Lovitz Comedy Club up at Universal CityWalk once a week

when he's not out whoring his movie. And when he's out whoring his movie, you have guest hosts? Yes. We had Adam Carolla last week

and John Lovitz has come by since he owns the joint. I have to let him. Right. That's nice of you. Now, what are you saying there about John's performance

on the podcast? Nothing at all. He was wonderful. Wow, that's so weird that John Lovitz just jumped in and joined the panel. Mr. Lovitz, welcome. Whenever he hears his name, he appears. He's like Beetlejuice. He says,

what was the context? That's the ticket. I need to know if I'm still relevant. I feel like I turned into something else there at the end. Still relevant, see? Edward G. Robinson? Fuck off. Edward G. Robinson, yeah. I'll take it.

You brought some sort of your own urine beverage. It's actually a fresh squeezed beverage from Tender Actually, it is a fresh-squeezed beverage from Tender Greens, and it is elk urine. Not my urine, Doug.

Fresh-squeezed elk urine? Yeah, they gotta squeeze the elk to get it out. You ever seen an elk piss? Well, case closed. You gotta earn it. If I gotta convince somebody something about an animal It's usually an elk

How many people have seen An elk That's right Are you really asking the audience if they've seen an elk No I'm doing a monologue from a short film that I recently wrote Yes I was asking about elk This has been a weird podcast. So, Ralph, on the Kevin and Bean show,

you walk the showbiz beat. I do. So does that mean, are you like me, like you talk about a lot of stuff you really haven't seen, or do you really go out and see lots and lots of movies? No, I don't see anything. TV shows?

No. Because you've got to get up at four in the morning and talk about that stuff. So why see it when you can just talk about Because you've got to get up at four in the morning and talk about that stuff. So why see it when you can just talk about what you've heard? Right. It's all hearsay. I love that. And I've got a one-year-old girl at home now, a baby girl, and you can't do fuck all with a one-year-old.

You shouldn't do fuck all. No. That's what social services told me, anyway. So it's almost time to start taking her anyway. But, so, is she almost, it's almost time to start taking her to see crap, though, right? Oh, no, God, no. She's addicted to television now, so it's all Thomas the Tank Engine

and other unwatchable shit. If you're like Mad Men and 30 Rock. Jesus Christ, pretentious little girl. I thought Thomas the Tank Engine was like a boy thing. Easy, Doug. Are you saying my daughter's a lesbian? I'm just saying that you might want to keep an eye on that. What's he going to do if he sees it?

Well, just, you know. No lesbian thing over there. You have to just, I guess you just have to live with it once you see it, but it's still good to have a heads up. Get her extensions and a tutu. But yeah, I thought that was like a... I like that image. Have you shown her something with Barbie or somebody in it?

No, not yet. She's just one. What do you mean, shown her? Do you mean a film with Barbie in it? Yeah, you haven't shown her any of the Barbie films? Have you shown her anything about Klaus Barbie is what I meant. You weirdo. Let's talk to Andy for a second.

Andy Wood is not only a funny comedian, but he's also a founder. Is that the right word for you? That's a co-founder. Co-founder of the Bridgetown Comedy Festival in Portland, Oregon. That happens every year coincidentally a few days after 420 is what seems to always happen starts the after this year yeah tell us tell us about about your festival uh this is the fourth year this year you've got uh christian shaw and kurt braunler doing hot tub their variety show cool uh margaret cho andy dick

you're gonna be there of course Of course. Sean Cullen, Sean Cullen. That's awesome. Yeah. I'm really psyched for that. I love that dude. I mean, all those people were good,

but he's awesome. And, um, super convincing. He's been, he's been on this show more than those other people, but also, uh, yeah,

Graham Elwood and I are going to be doing his podcast, comedy film nerds from, uh, somewhere on April 22nd during Bridgetown. That's correct. And then I'll be making surprise appearances throughout the weekend. Can't talk about them yet. That shows. So if you're in Portland, if you're in

P-Town, April 21st, April 22nd, April 23rd, April 24th, four days of great comedy. Bridgetown Comedy Festival.

All right. Thank you, Andy, for coming. You can leave now. Thank you, guys. It's been great. I had that feel. That's all I wanted to do was plug your shit.

Right. No, please stick around for the rest of the proceedings. And TJ and I just taped Doug Loves Movies back. Doug Loves Movies live back in the Pacific Northwest. It was a return to Parler Live in Bellevue, Washington. Back in the Panac.

And that's going to be available now or soon on iTunes, depending on when you listen to this. And was that fun for you, TJ? I was barely there. Yeah. There were some local edibles that were pretty amazing. We had some chocolate hearts that ended up

to break our real hearts. How did they do that? Because we went home stoned and alone, that's why. That sounds like a great Macaulay Culkin film. Fuck Macaulay Culkin film Holy shit Not Macaulay Culkin It's my next movie Stoned Alone

My family goes to Europe And I am I am home alone And I have to fight The wet bandits And by wet bandits I mean my urge to masturbate And the only way

You can fend them off Is with booby traps That you said But they all don't work Because you're stoned I just keep hitting myself to masturbate. And the only way you can fend them off is with booby traps that you set but they all don't work because you're stoned. I just keep hitting myself in the face with paint cans. You can't find

you put the paint cans up but you can't figure out where they are or where the twine is. Have you ever been trying to set up paint can traps and you can't find the twine?

Yeah, there was never a scene where Macaulay was looking, he needed a specific thing. And in movie land, there's plenty of twine. He has as many bowling balls, as many paint cans, as much twine as he needs. Didn't he have hot tar somehow? Where'd he find hot tar? Well, you can get that.

You know, he's gotta go to Koreatown. Come on, man. Who doesn't know how to get their hands on some hot tar? You can get your cold tar in 20 minutes. You just wait for the hot tar to cool? Yeah, don't tell him. How hot could it be if it's 20 minutes is all it takes? We're getting some fucking lukewarm tar.

Trying to pass it off as formally hot. The tar, from the guy that I get it from, the tar is hot within 10 minutes. Jesus, if you bring me some more of that LWT, that goddamn lukewarm tar, I will snap. Now, Ralph, do you sincerely never go to the cinema

or have you seen something recently that we could talk about? What's the most recent movie you saw? We were in New York for the premiere of Red State at Radio City Music Hall. And you were there and saw the premiere

and saw the movie? Yes. And you were there and saw the premiere and saw the movie? Yes. And you were in it as well? Yes. What do you play in? It's Kevin Smith's not comedy. Right, it's his horror film. And I play a right-wing religious zealot mute murderer.

Wait, back up. Hold up. The mute part, I like the mute part. Oh, do you? I mean, not now. I'd. The mute part. I like the mute part. Oh, do you? I mean, not now. I'd like you to speak. But in general, that's pretty cool to be cast as a mute person because no lines to learn.

Exactly. Yeah, it was the best gig ever. Just show up. Just show up and just be there ready to, you want to kill. Yeah, Smith called me lurch with a gun. How can you be a zealot and not speak? Isn't part of the zeal that you're talking about what you're zealous about? I guess you'd be extra zealous if you can't speak.

That's true. You'd be like, I can't make enough signs. I'm just going to start killing things. I thought it was pronounced zealiot. Zealiot? That's how it was pronounced. You're thinking of Kamali a lot. And so now as

can you separate yourself as a person who judges entertainment and as a person who plays a mute zealot in Red State? No. So you loved the movie?

I loved me. Unconditionally. Oh, loved the movie. Loved me. Alright, cool. It was great. That's fair. I try, you try, but it's hard when your friend made it

and you're in it, and so you're pulling for it, but the audience seemed to dig it, so. That's a crucial component. Saw the movie, loved it. You did? Loved me. I just like that phrase.

Oh. Saw the movie, loved it, loved me. All right, well well let me ask you I'm gonna start saying that about a few of my films alright let's start with Yogi Bear saw the movie

yeah loved it no you didn't and I couldn't believe me it was unbelievable that performance unparalleled in a talking bear comedy in the last 100 years me. It was unbelievable, that performance.

Unparalleled in a talking bear comedy in the last 100 years. In the last 100 years? How long has film been around? Not much more than 100 years. What else would qualify as a talking bear comedy? Oh, boy. It depends on how you classify bears. Country bears? Yeah, that had talking bears.

Some people consider Harry and the Hendersons to be a bear film because... Because those people are stupid? Well, no. No, because we're not certain of the genus of Harry. We don't know what an abominable snowman is. It could be a type

of bear. Oh, sorry, guys. Bad News Bears. Bad News Bears. They were Talking bears, but... But they were only bears because that was the name of their sports club. That is the only talking bear comedy where they say the N-word, for sure.

Well, they always say faggot a few times in there. You never use the N-word in your... In Yogi? Well, buy the Blu-ray Deluxe. Like, for instance, what does Yogi call a black picnic basket? Don't say it. That's horrible. I was joking around yesterday.

We were, was it yesterday? We were flying back from Seattle. I think it was. Keep going. At SeaTac, they have signs everywhere that say, this way to the N gates. And I always, I can't help thinking, there's N word gates?

Well, tell him what you said. Tell him what you said to me in the train. What did I say? He goes, this is so funny. He goes, I always feel racist when I go to the N word gates. And I, you know, I wanted to laugh, but he said it very loudly, and we were surrounded by African Americans.

And so I had to kind of turn to them and be like, it's just at the N-gates. It doesn't say N-word. And they sort of were like, it's fine. And then Doug was like, what? What are you guys talking about? How funny that was? And I was like, yeah, Doug, definitely. Definitely.

It was great. You make up a lot of stuff have you been to the movies lately andy uh i saw the green hornet recently in the second run theater oh okay so uh no 3d glasses for you no 3d probably no sexual intercourse you're seeing the hornet at a theater now that i know it's supposed to be 3d some of those scenes make more sense yeah like with seth rogers just standing there with his dick out yeah yeah yeah yeah i didn't really get it but um the originals probably had more nuance to it yeah all right it was pretty good i just thought there was not there wasn't enough at stake. There wasn't enough of a reason for him to become a superhero.

I don't know what he was trying to do. Didn't they kill his dad or something at the beginning? He didn't know that. I mean, spoiler alert, but he didn't know that his dad died

from a bee sting. Oh, so he didn't even know what he was fighting for. Right, it was nothing. Turned out the bee sting was caused by the bad guys and he didn't know that. I love that being a spoiler alert.

Like somebody gets there and they're like, hold on a second. He didn't know that. I love that being a spoiler alert. Like somebody gets there and they're like, hold on a second. He didn't know it. This movie sucks. I thought the whole time that he knew it. The movie has opening credits.

Spoiler alert. Wait, so what? Oh, so you saw Red State. That's what you said Yeah But that's it That's your That's the extent of it

For now Yeah Well that's good Just go see the movies That you play Mute in See them Until your daughter Is old enough to

Love me and them Love you and them Let me ask you this About Red State At what age Does your daughter Have to be Before you think

It'll be appropriate For her to watch it I need to be dead. Oh, really? Because it's so disturbing how you behave in it? Yes. I'm a foul, foul human being. Oh, my God.

Not that I'm not in person. She'll get to know that as she grows up. But I don't want her to see it on the big screen. It's very disturbing. It's based on the... Wait until it comes out on DVD. Or, yeah, maybe someday she can watch it on her phone instead of the big screen. It's based on the Westboro Baptist Church.

The Phelps family. Yeah, yeah. So, it's pretty repugnant. Yeah, it's a disturbing story. And if Kevin were here, I'd ask him more about it. Yeah. Well, he's not, so... Sounds kind of like he's dead. If Kevin were here,

we could talk about it. Of course, he's no longer with us. Just before I get too far into this, I just want to be clear that on Twitter you can follow TJ at NotTJMiller, which is one of the most clever Twitter handles

I've heard. Well, Doug Benson was taken. First off, slick. I Well, Doug Benson was taken. First off, slick. I went with Doug Benson because not T.J. Miller was taken. And Andy, what's yours on there? Andy T. Wood. So someone else got to Andy Wood before you.

Everyone gets to Andy Wood first. I can only grab the T's. Andy T. Wood. Makes you sound a little more hardcore. Andy T. Wood. That sounds like a ventriloquist act. Or he should be flying out of the N gates. One or the other.

Or the C gates. That's real. The C gates. Yeah, they have C gates there too. They offend everyone at that airport. Yeah. With their gates. Their racist and sexist gates.

There's one gate that says the racist and sexist gates. Yeah, there was one gate that said, the she ain't shit gates. That was a misogynistic gate. It sounds like it was one person. You said bitches ain't shit? Yeah. That's probably what I should have said, bitches ain't shit. That's like somebody who's naming gates

when they had a problem with one person. Like at airports, you get to name gates. All right, March birthdays, get to name the new gates. What do you guys want to name it? I have a problem with all the C's and all the N's, so we'll go generic on those. But I also want to name a gate, she ain't shit gate. There's another one that was,

fuck Mrs. Vandaway from kindergarten. That's a real person and she was a cunt. Could he just lump her into the sea gates? Did he have to? Oh, and Ralph, what's your

Twitter handle? At Ralph Garman Dunn. See, that's how it's done. Not a lot of Ralph Garman Dunn. G-A-R-M-A-N. Yeah. Shall we play some games? Yeah!

Let's start with... Don't hold your name tags up yet. Because there's no... There's only winners in this next game. There's no losers. Look, that guy's got a boatat Cucumber Wire shirt on. That's cool. Now, look at that shirt, panelists,

and tell me, I told them when that shirt was created, from a distance, you can't tell it says Boat. It just looks like it says Cucumber Wire because Boat was too light against a light blue shirt. You're absolutely right. I thought it said Bout Cucumber Wire. That's what I'm about. Yeah.

Cucumber wire motherfuckers. Yeah. So I'm glad you pointed that out. You give me some wire and a cucumber. You watch me cut that shit up. That's what I'm about. Slice them down. Cucumber wire.

That's like the VeggieTales version of the wire, right? Like vegetables that are... I would totally watch that. Oh my God. that'd be so great if they reenacted the entire all five seasons of the wire but they're vegetables and they're they're beating up and they're very religious extremely plus subtext in there i beat your ass if i didn't believe that jesus loved each and every one of us what's the information shit I'm a cucumber alright

that wasn't lazy at all that joke no let's play build a title let's get a suggestion of a title from an audience member this gentleman sitting right here too much pressure

here's what you got to do. All you got to do is name a movie. Any movie. Men in Black. That's perfect. Well done. All right. And then we'll start.

Is it perfect because it is actually a movie? Yeah. Is that why it's perfect? Yeah. Okay. And it's also, it's got more, you know, it's got one word in it. It doesn't work. Because now what TJ's going to try to do is he's going to try to add a title to Men in Black

of another movie that ends in men or begins in black. Then we move down the line until people can't do it anymore and then we have a... That's the end of the game. Little Women in Black.

I love it. Combound words are allowed. Is that what you're saying? Oh yeah. No it's a title. You have to build it with another title. Little women

and black. Okay. Little women and black. I love that I like told you this is how it's played. Like I've ever won

any of these games ever. Well I don't want to spoiler alert the Doug Loves Movies live back in Pacific Northwest. And put a cucumber.

You might win something. You might. Andy? I'm going to go Little Women in Black Hawk Down. Oh, yeah. Making this game sexy. Okay, Ralph, so we need something that ends in little or begins in down. Stuart Little, women in black.

I love it. Lockdown. Okay. I'm going to go down and out in Beverly Hills. So you have to start, end with Stuart or begin with Hills. Stuart, Little Women, and Black Hawk, down and out in Beverly Hills Cop. Nice. I don't know why they got a round of applause because I said it was such confidence

so skillfully done I gave you Beverly Endhills so it wasn't hard at all yeah good thing I came with that I'm gonna go Stewart Little women In black

Hawk down and out In Beverly Hills Cop land Whoa I like it Why did I say that? We can't add two at a time Ralph

Oof Yeah you can Oof Need something that begins in land Or something that begins in land or something that ends in Stuart or could it I'm sitting here trying to think of something that ends in stew but I don't know if there's a movie

that's called something stew beef stew that's not a movie isn't it didn't I just make it last month i didn't you made a stew or a movie called bc i made both but separately you don't have anything that begins with land no i'm jammed up wow i got it i got it people can't believe don't Don't be mean. Yeah.

You're not up here. Yeah. You don't know what it's like to feel the pressure. The pressure of the moment is hard. Can I do it? Quiet over there, goddammit. I'm mind murdering you. What you said then ending with Land of the Lost.

Yeah. See? Great. TJ's disappointed. Okay, what do you got, TJ? You got something that begins with Lost? Isn't it your turn?

Oh, yeah. End Found. What? How is that a movie? There's got to be a movie called Lost and Found. No no it's a series of films is it the room at spade it was about i can't believe you guys paid a cute girl played by french actress sophie marceau lives next door to him and loses her dog and he finds it

and he i mean he pretends to find it, and then he gets some pussy. Let's call a David Spade a David Spade and say that I wasn't expecting that one. All right, do you have anything that begins in found? Yeah. Hold on. Found your wallet isn't one. Found and Lost would be a good title. Is the Spade movie backwards?

It's Pinter's version of that Spade movie. Thanks, guy in the back. Oh, that sucks. Hold on. Found. I know, I know I know does it don't yell it out but does anybody think they have one that might I didn't intend for that to be a stopper but it seems to have worked hold on it's gotta be something. That guy in the audience is saying. It's being very encouraging. There's gotta be something.

Okay. Stuart Little, Women in Blackhawk, Down and Out, and Beverly Hills, Cop Land of the Lost and Found Diam diamonds are forever. Fuck you guys! Let me hang! I liked how one girl

cheered like you really did it. Why you really did it. Found diamonds are forever. Yeah, that's really good. If you find diamonds, that is forever though. I don't think you have one either though, do you Andy? Is The Foundling a movie? It's not a movie, is it?

Am I making that up? That is? Okay. That guy goes, yeah. And you go, is it? And he goes, no. Yeah, you're making it up. Was The Foundling a book?

I have no idea. I don't know why that came up. I'm going to ask Leonard. I'm going to find out. I think the foundling is something. Stuart Little Women and Black Hawk Down and Out and Beverly Hills Copland of the Lost and

Frounders. That ought to count for something. You're out. But nice try. It says no results for foundling. But that does seem like it should be a movie. Founders Keepers? All right, I'm just going to type in the word found and see what happens,

see if it says anything. But I don't think so. I think we're done. I think we have to be happy with no results. We have to be happy with Stuart Little, women in black, hawk down and out in Beverly Hills, cop land of the lost and found. But thanks for playing.

Yeah. Now let's play some Leonard Maltin game. The real game that we're here to play. Four prizes. Gentlemen, the name tags are out. This one says Bearcum on it. I think that's for you.

Justin wrote Bearcum on his sign for you, TJ. Oh, he wrote Bearcum. I assume. Oh, in that case I won't pick him Just kidding Jordan wrote his name on a baseball Rob has an extra big sign

That also looks like a You know, what do you call it? Printout? No, somebody's holding a hostage note Right, but it's not different colors. Wouldn't that be weird if somebody made a hostage poster with big letters on it? Somebody named Hans

has a Jaws theme back there. That's fun. There's Brooke, but she crossed out the B and it just says Rook. It's worth noting that Colin is on toilet paper that is continually rolling out and still says no. I choose Colin.

I choose Colin. He's like, no matter how much shit's in your ass that needs to be wiped out, Colin's going to be there for you. And he's creepily rolling it slowly still. We've acknowledged it, but he's still rolling it. You know why? Because he did the whole roll and he's like, there's no way I'm stopping now. They're going to see how crazy Colin is. now. They gonna see how crazy Colin is. They gonna see how crazy Colin is.

Zach has a beautiful Wheel of Fortune shirt that he wrote Zach on and then also wrote, I ruined this shirt just to be picked on Doug Loves Movies. Wow. This guy's got a picture of Mark Hamill on his phone. Circa Star Wars A New Hope. Is your name Luke or Mark? Luke. And his name is Luke,

so that makes sense. Kristen has a nice little Douglas movie. Okay, so go out into the audience, gentlemen, and pick the name tag you want to play for. What is that one? That's a prescription. For what? A medical marijuana prescription she's holding up. Do you get it

if we pick you? We win it? Colin, come on up. Thank you. Oh man, it's going to be so weird to wipe my ass with your name. TJ took Colin's toilet paper and Andy Wood

is playing for Sam who made a very nice... I dare to say it's almost 3D, that sign. And it has N3 on the back, so there's the N word again. For no reason. And Ralph picked the baseball from Jordan. Good work, Jordan. So in the future, if you want to just pick up any item and write your name on it, pick the baseball from Jordan. Good work, Jordan. So, in the future, if you want to, you know, just pick up

any item and write your name on it. Well, baseball season just started, so I thought it was a nice tie-in. So, there you go. It's just in time for baseball season, of course. And I approve of recycling, so cardboard. Alright, here's what we're playing for. An amazing gift bag, once again.

Andy Wood brought a copy of The Believer It's a magazine Is it a monthly magazine? I think it's monthly This is the 2011 film issue And it's got an interview with I think as Andy put it Noted pervert Paul Verhoeven

Is interviewed in there We got a backpack That was given to me by some nice people at the April Foolishness, Kevin and Bean April Foolishness show. So I'm retweeting it. I mean, not retweeting it. I'm, uh...

Yeah, I'm gonna retweet about a backpack. It's bleeding into your everyday conversation. Yeah, yeah. I meant to say paying it forward, but that's what retweeting means. Somebody likes something nice, and then you go,

I favorite that comment. It says, Baby Elton John. A hat from New Era, 5950, whatever that means. And, oh, this is great.

This is one of the things they gave me the other night. I'm not really a wine drinker, but did you get one of these, Ralph? They have bottles of Francis Coppola wine. I did not get that, sir. Would you enjoy that? Enormously.

Well, just take it then. All right, great. That's out of the prize pack, you guys. That's out of the prize pack. Oh, man, that was weird. Can I open it now? No, no. I mean, you can if you really want to, but that's something to take home to the wife and the baby.

Yeah, especially the baby. And you brought, Ralph brought, because he's in it, he brought a copy of Sharktopus. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, that is awesome. And he signed it for you, and it was cool. He wrote Eric Roberts, because he's in it.

Yeah. So that's nice that he put his signature on there. Nobody wants my signature, so I put a good one on there. And since he sobered up, you can't tell the difference. And then, as always, we have some... I'm going to give somebody a woot monkey, but I also like to give one to a lucky member of the audience.

Woot monkey is a monkey that's also a slingshot. There it goes. Oh! People yelling. Yeah, he didn't scream, but hopefully this one will. So that's what it sounds like

if you win a Woot Monkey and they're a lot of fun to shoot at kids or whatever. And that's what we're playing for. Let's play the Leonard Mullen game for Colin or Sam or Jordan. And I'd like to say, I'd like to extend

as my prize, whoever wins, I'll follow you on Twitter and then just DM me an address to send you both Yogi Bear and She's Out of My League Blu-ray. And I'm only going to sign one of them. So write Eric Roberts on one And Ralph Garman on the other That's not fair

It's for you guys Alright Let's start with Ralph Since he's Sober With it He's ready to go We got category punctuated titles And sober. With it. He's with it. He's ready to go.

We've got a category, punctuated titles. That's movies with punctuation in the title. All right. Punctuation of some kind. Fishy movies. Those are movies with the word fish somewhere in the title. And then Time Magazine's best soundtracks. They did a list of all the best soundtracks of all time. And these are some of those movies with the best soundtracks. They did a list of all the best soundtracks of all time,

and these are some of those movies with the best soundtracks. Wow. Which category would you like to play? Let's go with soundtracks. Soundtracks. Soundtracks, okay. Would you like a soundtrack from 1988, 2000, or 2004? 88.

All right. The pressure mounts. Leonard gives this movie three and a half stars. I give it four. It's probably come up on this game a few times before because I love it so much. I'll give you a couple of clues. All right. He says this movie features a remarkable debut performance

and it was written by, or no, let's see it was oh, the movie's full of keen observational humor yeah, keen K-E-E-N remarkable

debut performance and there's three and a half stars from Len, it's from 1998, it's got a great soundtrack according to Time magazine and there are 11 names who did you say 88 or 98 if you had to guess which one would you say it sounded like 98 the last time 98 it's 98 it was 98 okay is that what you asked for 98 I I thought you said 88. Oh, Jesus. And this is when the thing really fell apart. I don't have any for me. No matter what happens here, I'm going to be complaining to the commissioner when it's all over. I don't have an 88.

I screwed up. It's 98. But you could do it. 98. Great soundtrack from 98. How many names? Keen observational humor And the character's Remarkable debut performance There are 11 names

How many names do you think you can get it in? You can bid high and see what happens Yeah, let's say Let's start with 7 Alright, and we come around here to TJ How many? Six. Andy?

I'm going to go three. Oh, nice. Ralph, you could say name that movie or go lower. Name that movie, Andy. Do you need the clues again, Andy? No, I'm good. The names are Andrew Wilson, Luke Wilson. Rushmore.

Why do you have to be such a show-off? Wow. Rich is Rushmore. Why do you have to be such a show-off? Wow. Wow. A remarkable debut performance by both Jason Schwartzman and you. Well done. Andy gets

one point. We'll start with TJ over here since you weren't mixed up in that skirmish. Would you like Ernest Goes To movies? Really popular category that no one ever picks. Is that a repeat offender, that one? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Super movies, that's movies with the word super in the title. Because, you know, I'm a big fan of the current movie called Super. And speaking of current movies in theaters now that's motion pictures that are in theaters now okay which category would you like tj miller i'll take earnest ghost Wow. Let's have some fun. Let's have us a show, shall we? Let's have us a show. Okay, all right. They came to play, so did I, Douglas.

Let's have fun. All right, none of these are from 1988, so if I say 1988, do not believe me. I'll take it. 88. No, that's not an option. Good, then I will not have it. Colin, it's not believe me. I'll take it. 88. No, that's not an option. Good. Then I will not have it. Colin, it's you and me.

Would you like an Ernest Goes To movie from 87? Uh-oh. 1990? Don't thank you. Or 94? Oh, shit. What are you playing? I knew only the other years

I was like those are my three spotty years give them to me again 47 what was it 73 Ernest 87 90 Ernest we've heard it all time

what do we do, Vern? I'll go for that one in the 90s. When was that? 90 or 94. Good, we're narrowing it down. It's a process. I think 94. Okay.

Thank you. People like it. Yeah, I know. I kind of did it for you. I wasn't pointing at you So don't tell me You didn't clap Cause I wasn't Fucking pointing at you

Alright Leonard calls this one A bomb Uh oh Oh that's a bomb Looks like we only Have 15 left On a scale of bomb

To four stars He gives it bomb He says He was running Out of steam by that time It was the mid 90s never mind he calls it completely predictable and unfunny and then

a fantastic fantastic way to sum up this movie only for die hard earnest fans which I am. I am one of those. And there are five names. 94. There's only five people willing to be associated with this.

Hey, you know what? I said we're going to have a show, aren't we? So let's have one. Name that movie. Oh, you want me to name it? I think I can. I think I can do it. You let me read the names. How many names do you think you can get it in?

Five. Or six. He says five. Andy? Can I ask? There's no way more than one name is a name anybody here knows, right? There's recognizable names, but it won't help you to know which Ernest movie it is.

You had to say negative one, right? You can, but you'd have to name it properly, and you'd have to name the lead actor in the movie. Negative one. All right. Fair enough.

Unbearably exciting. You're not going to say anything. It's not your turn. So, Ralph, if you think you could name the second Bill person in this movie, then you would say negative two, but since I assume you can't

how dare you sir do it you're right but I'm insulted yeah so I guess we just have to say name that movie

to Andy for the win you have to name the movie first of all name the one the lead actor I'm going to go

with Jim Varney that's correct yeah and which goes to movie do you think it is Ernest Goes to. That's correct. Yeah, and which goes to movie do you think it is? Ernest goes to school.

That's correct. Wow. I want to tell you something. Wow. And with that, Andy not only wins this particular game, but he's also not in the upcoming tournament championships, but he's in the next one. Can I say something?

With that negative one answer, that was amazing. Can I say something that's sad? The saddest thing of all? Last week, or yesterday, oh God, when we were in Seattle, I chose Ernest Goes To as a category, and I

won with that movie because as we were playing it just now i was like i think we played this recently oh and that is really amazing now people have to go buy that one for two dollars and listen to you get it right you see so you got it right even i don't even know man listen to you get it right you see you got it right even i don't even know man get into it wow that's awesome all right so where's sam that's who uh andy was playing for where's sam at up there all right come get your prizes sam i'm gonna go i'm gonna go this far with them so lazy i am that was like watching Watson on Jeopardy.

Where's Colin? Right there. I got to find out who Colin wants me to call his shithead. Do you guys have anything you want to plug? What's coming up? Where can people see Red State? All over the country? In October.

It opens wide in October. All right. And where's... So that was Colin. Do you want your toilet paper back or does he get to keep it? Jordan's right there there You have the back Oh Jordan's Oh yeah there's Jordan

Alright Sorry man Andy tell us about The Bridgetown Comedy Festival Bridgetowncomedyfestival.com All the info's up there It's April 21st to the 24th In Portland with 200 comics

Right on It's a great festival It's a good time All for one low price You can see everything And be sure to listen to TJ Miller getting Ernest Goes to School

correct on a previously taped episode up in Seattle. Up in Bellevue, Washington. And what else you got to plug, TJ? You can see me in the Paul Rudd film which I saw today with another actress,

Janet Montgomery, who's also on Twitter. And that's coming out at the end of August, is Mighty Brother with Paul Rudd and Rashida Jones and Emily Mortimer. Nice. I'm sure you'll be on again before then. If you had something more recent to plug, that'd be good.

I'll be in Addison, Texas at some point in the next month. Oh, that sounds good. Oh'll be in Addison, Texas at some point in the next month. Oh, that sounds good. Oh, yeah. With the improv there? Yeah, I'm doing the improv down there. I'm going to be in Salt Lake City, Boise, Missoula, Philadelphia, and more.

Go to Douglovesmovies.com for my whole tour schedule. Thank you to all of my guests, TJ Miller, Andy Wood, Ralph Garman. Thank you to all of my guests, TJ Miller, Andy Wood, Ralph Garman. As always, Jeff Lewis is a shithead. Whoever Jeff Lewis is. And Rebecca Black's parents is a shithead.

Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. He hides a golded his viewing prowess makes him foggy. There's no room in his heart for you. Because Doug loves movies. Thanks a lot, you guys. See you next week.