Doug Loves Movies - The 12 Guests of Christmas NYC

Episode Date: November 29, 2015

Recorded live at the Gramercy Theatre in New York, New York on November 30, 2015. Kurt Braunohler, Rob Cantrell, Trey Galyon, Doogie Horner, Carmen Lynch, Aparna Nancherla, Elliot Kalan, Seth Herzog, Ramon Rivas II, Jesse Pasternak, and Greg Wyshynski compete.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers screaming, candy sticky seats with 50 added homework journals in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves candy wrappers. That was like a Christmas graduation ceremony. Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is the most movies. There's a little feedback on that one.

You guys don't even have microphones. Coming to you from the Gramercy Theater in New York City for the second annual 12 Guests of Christmas East Coast Style! It's Monday, November 30th, 2015. I hope all of you had a terrific Thanksgiving weekend. And I hope you all brought some name tags. I think you did. This is going to be a big prize pile for somebody.

Because I know all this shit's not going to fit in this laundry bag. That giant Tim Curry face scares me. that giant Tim Curry face scares me oh wow the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man got a better seat tonight last night you were back there a little bit so good luck to you I think that's a pretty good one and then Katie who knitted the donuts last night

tonight she's got this giant it's not knitted it is... It's not knitted. It is? That's completely knitted? Oh my God, you're the fastest knitter. You made that today? And it's a giant alien head that's quite realistic and scary.

And I can't imagine it not getting chosen. Other than how dark it is. It just kind of looks like you're holding up a void. Like you're sitting in an area of, look, I brought some darkness. But good luck to you and to everyone. There's lots of name tags.

Too many for me to get into. Peter Steller. Did you, like, win one time? No, I got picked. You got picked, but you didn't win. Okay. I was just guessing. Alright, put him down. Bring him back out a little later.

I like the lady in the front row with the Grinch shirt on. Didn't bring a name tag. Just has a scowling face on her chest. It's okay. I was just joking around. Don't worry about it, lady. Devin's mother.

Don't worry about it. Doug's plugs. Lots of Doug Lowe's movies tapings are coming up in Los Angeles and elsewhere in 2016. Go to DougLowe'sMovies.com. That's DougLowe'sMovies.com. Let's look in the prize bag.

Backstage, I don't eat this sort of thing anymore. A giant bag of various Hershey's candies. Yeah, fuck it. You know what? I'm just going to give you guys some. I'm just going to splay them out at you. So watch your faces. You want it! Come and get it,

you bunch of shamus! I've imprisoned you! You're stuck here for the next two hours. This is the only food you're gonna get. You better give them all a standing ovation when they come out here. Last night, there was a weird standing ovation in the front,

but nowhere else. Oh, let me get the side section. Bartender. Almost. I didn't want to hit you, though. You really want one? Ha, ha, ha, ha, though. You really want one? All right, just one. Reese's? You like Reese's? Yeah.

Oh, that was pretty close. Hit somebody else in the eye, though. What do you think of Hershey's Special Dark? Oh. It's really got the white ladies excited. He wasn't even...

The bartender wasn't even looking, so... It's a good thing I was such a shitty throw. Alright, we're almost done. Go through the whole bag. Because people love paying two bucks to listen to this. Oh, he just threw candy at people? Oh, sorry, there's nothing in the prize bag now. No, I got a sippy cup from I went and saw a Broadway show or two.

I got a sippy cup. I got a wrist slappy thingy that says house at the end of the street. A Douglas Movies t-shirt. Yeah, here's where things get really good. A Douglas Movies sticker. A button that says schmovie on it. Because I'm not bringing no fucking And finally A Tenacious D guitar pick That was probably in one of Jack or Kyle's orifices At some time All of that

Plus what 12 guests have brought To contribute to the prize bag that's why i didn't bring much to be honest with you because somebody's gonna win a lot of stuff and probably has to go home on a train or something so good luck with that let's get them out here here. Competing to see who will be the winner of the second annual 12 Guests of Christmas East Coast style old

school OG Leonard Maltin game. Please welcome Kurt Braunohler, Rob Cantrell, Trey Gallion, Doogie please welcome Kurt Braunohler, Rob Cantrell Trey Galleon, Doogie Horner Carmen Lynch Elliot Kalin Seth Herzog, Ramon Rivas

the second, Jesse Pasternak Greg Wyshynski Aparna Nancherla and Pete Davidson. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. All right, so as you can see, there's an empty seat.

And don't be sad. Is Santa coming? No, we're saving that seat for Elijah. Put some blood on a plate. We're going to leave the door open. Our Elijah tonight is Pete Davidson, was very excited and interested in participating tonight but he's on a program called saturday night live and monday nights are iffy

over there for the uh people that work on the show whether or not they have to be there late and so he's going to try to get out of there and race over here and i told him no matter what moment he appears he can enter the competition as if he's been playing the entire time and yeah it'll be a total wild card situation wait a minute he just gets preferential treatment

that's what I just said Trey do you want to leave now? no so yeah he gets preferential treatment just because he's going to race down here And I don't want him to come down here for nothing And also, he's not great at this game So you guys, whoever is still in it

Should be able to take him on But we'll see, you never know Anybody can win Last year's winner is here Rob Cantrell, everybody New York City Hello Do you have any words everybody New York City hello do you have any

you know words about defending your title this evening I'm psyched I'm ready to defend it and no that's about it

right there I can do it I can do it I'm just psyched to be here Doug alright that's great yeah we'll see you know we'll see how you do. Do you have any words of advice about how you won?

Oh, how I won? I just didn't tell anybody. That's Seth Herzog, who came in second. Yeah. Thank you, true fans. I like to call him Seth Sour Grapes Herzog. What's up, Sour Grapes? You still feel bad about it?

Yeah, there's a lot of anger here A lot of anger And what went wrong, according to you? What went wrong was I had to name the last three movies And three actors I knew all three I did accidentally reverse the order of the two And then Rob won

Because he hadn't moved from the chair I told Seth It was a lesson in Zen. Yeah, he really knew how to hang in there. Sometimes you just got to be yourself, and shit will come to you. And for the listeners, all the ladies screaming,

well, Seth, explain that. That doesn't really line up. That's not what they were screaming for. Kurt Braunohler decided disrobe partially. I was taking off this sweater I just bought. Found out it was too hot for my body. Your body's too hot for that sweater. I sweat a lot.

I have a problem. Alright, so we're going to meet everybody individually as we play the game. So the first thing we need to do is get some name tags sorted out. This audience really stepped up, you guys. They brought some amazing stuff. So take your time if you have to, but select the name tag that speaks to each and every one of you.

I'll take Tim Curry for sure. And take it back to your seat. I'll take Royal Ted and Bounds. Royal Ted and Bounds. Because it lights up. Be sure to look into the black void in the front row, you guys. Ramone, look in the front row right in front of you. Look down.

Do you like the movie Alien? The Aaron? Yeah. Try to push him into picking the alien head. That's the guy. That's the guy whose name tag it is. Yeah.

There's some up in the balcony. The balcony is screaming for equal rights. Damn. All balconies matter, you guys. I went up there last year, and it sucked. Can I switch or no? What do you mean? Why do you want to switch?

Well, there's donuts, and then there's someone crafted. Oh, okay. Yeah, switch if you want to switch? Well, there's donuts and then there's someone crafted. Oh, okay. Yeah, switch if you want. I could use some donuts. I want you to be satisfied with your choice. Look at this. I mean, if you're comfortable being a dick. No, but seriously, put that thing on.

That's the alien head. It is a crochet alien head. I was hoping somebody would pick it. Oh, he's going to wear it? He can wear it? Look at this shit. Look at that. That's the alien head. I was hoping somebody would pick it. He's going to wear it? Look at this shit. That's crazy. I always wondered what it would be like if the alien wore glasses

and had a J behind his ear. Did you make that or did you buy it? You made it. She makes this shit. It crawled out of her body just like alien. That's Katie. Who's hosting this show, Kurt? I'll take over whenever you want to take a break.

I feel like you turned me into a backseat host over here. All right. So everybody pick some name tags. We'll find out who you're playing for when we get to you, when it's your turn. Because we seriously got to start the gameplay. Because there's a concert here in this theater on Friday. the gameplay because there's a concert here in this theater on Friday. And it's arduous competition.

And like we said, Rob Cantrell just made it through just by being present. You just got to hang in there. To determine who goes first this evening, we are going to play a game that I call Cable Billing. Yeah. Cable companies, Netflix, whatever. Whenever you're watching a movie, they often just pick the most random people from the cast to list, and they only list like two names. And it's always like, what? That's what you'd say when you're talking about that movie? Those two people? Okay, whatever, cable. And I'm going to say the names of two people that my cable company listed as the people that are in this film. And the first person who says the correct movie is the winner.

And you can guess as many times as you want and as loudly as you want. No one in the audience, please. What movie does Time Warner Cable say has Burt Lancaster and Amy Madigan? Who said that? Greg? Greg Wyshynski is in with the Field of Dreams answer. Field of Dreams, ladies and gentlemen. If you build it.

It didn't dawn on me until we were playing the game that if everyone had microphones, that'd be more fair. But we all heard him say it. I'm just happy to carry on the grand tradition of sports writers on your panels. As you know, your show is constantly... Oh, wait, I'm the only one that's ever appeared. There's you and, you know, Bill Simmons was on once. It counts.

Yeah, sure. He's a sports writer. And that's it, probably. You're right. So I'm top two. But that means you're going to get to go first tonight so let's go ahead

and meet Greg Wyshynski everybody. Alright. So I'm playing for Indy Adam Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark. And that's your picture

I believe, Doug. That is a version of me as Indiana Jones. That's right. There you go. Tom Selleck didn't work out. Ferris and Ford was also a problem. I could have stepped right in there.

And for the prize back tonight, I bought a copy of my new book. Oh, thanks. It's called Take Your Eye Off the Puck. It's a book about, you know, it's for new fans and old fans. And there's a whole chapter about how goalies are psychopathic masochists. So if you're into that kind of thing, you know, it's pretty good.

But more importantly, I'm a huge fan of the podcast and a huge fan of when people bring actual films for the prize bag. So I bought, if Sudden Death with Sean Claude Van Am is the best hockey movie of all time, I think this one is the second best hockey movie of all time.

And that would be MVP, Most Valuable Primate, the movie in which a monkey plays hockey. Great film. You know, fun fact, Doug, fun fact. Pass it down while you share that fact. Fun fact. Air Bud was originally supposed to be called MVP for Most Valuable Pooch. But they went with Air Bud instead. Clearing the way for Most Valuable Primate.

And if this movie whets your appetite for more films with primates playing sports, there are two sequels to this film. That's right. Please watch the complete primate trilogy. Thanks a lot, nerd. The second is about skateboarding. The third is the next P, Most Extreme Primate.

Most Extreme Primate? Most Extreme Primate. Does he radical skateboard on it? Yep. He radical snowboards downhills. Nice. Nice. Yeah. You know,

uphill snowboarding is the trickiest. It's a lot of hopping. I'm glad you cleared up to take your eye off the puckers about hockey. I thought it was an analysis of Shakespeare's

Midsummer Night's Dream. Or bike messengers from the real world. Anyone over the age of 35 Oh well that's a reference Alright so we know who you're playing for We know what you brought for the prize bag We're gonna go ahead and start with you

You get to pick the first category I'm gonna let people pick categories for a while But if things get draggy I'm gonna pick categories for you guys I'm so fucked up about this not for a while, but if things get draggy, I'm going to pick categories for you guys. I'm so fucked up about this not being reverse Malton, by the way. It's been a year of prep for reverse Malton, and now we're back to OG. We'll have you on a regular show sometime, because that's what we mostly do now, but I think you'll be all right. I hope so.

I think you'll snap right back into it, and you're going to be in good shape. you'll snap right back into it. You're going to be in good shape. Which category would you like, Greg? Oh, and also, when we get down to five players, that's when we'll start reversing the order. But for now, we'll go clockwise.

And so that means that Carmen in the front row will be next. Yeah, get ready. Get ready for it. We'll meet you in a second. Greg gets to pick between Valentine's Dre, romantic movies that have a hip-hop artist in them. Sean John 1166 wants us to do There Will Be Flood

and that's movies where there is indeed a flood and at Movie Lodge came up with Raspberry Buffet and that's winners of the Golden Globe Raspberry for, I mean the Golden Raspberry the Golden Globe doesn't have a Raspberry category. Winners of Golden Raspberry for Worst Picture. Which one of those would you like to play, Greg?

In honor of Elliot Kalin from the Flophouse, we'll go with the Golden Raspberry for Worst Picture. Okay. All right. So I got a few choices for you. The worst picture, according to Razzy, is from 1997, 2004, or 2009? Let's go 2004. Okay. One and a half stars from Leonard for this movie.

That won the Razzie. Leonard agrees, kind of. I mean, one and a half stars, that's not too terrible. But he says it has a nonsensical story concept, is illogical in the extreme, sets up impossible relationships, and gives us a heroine who's scarcely worth rooting for.

And then he lists eight names. How many names from this movie, reading from the bottom up, will it take you to discern the title? Gonna have to go with all eight. You're taking all the names? Yes. Strong opening bid. Let's meet Carmen Lynch, everybody. Uh-oh.

Hi. Hi. Hi. Who are you playing for, Carmen? I'm playing for Karate Chris. That's nice. Come on. Really did a great job of putting the word Chris

over the word kid. You're Mr. Miyagi. Oh, no, you are Daniel-san. I thought you were Mr. Miyagi, but you're Daniel. That's me, really? Yeah, it's taped on there. It's not even really worked on that much. Oh, okay.

And there's no secret note in the back. I know I'm supposed to have something in the back. Yeah, there's supposed to be a shithead on the back, but if there isn't, if you don't win tonight, then that person doesn't get a shithead set because they blew it. Good job, Karate Chris. We're going to have plenty of shitheads at the end of this show.

I don't mind a few that fell by the wayside. No, I like the name. Yeah. Okay. And what'd you bring for the prize bag? I didn't really have much time. I brought, like, t-shirts that I had left over from road work

stuff. What does that mean? T-shirts that you sell? Yeah, but, like, some of them are old. Like I'll put dumb quotes on them. You know like love, like you've never been hurt. Shit like that. I put eat like nobody's

watching. I put dance like you don't need the money. So I have those. Well, if somebody got both and wore them on successive days, they get a bigger laugh the second day. See, I did that in that order on purpose. And then I found a Star Wars candy holder.

Oh, that's perfect for this. Delightful. That's for someone. It's probably not going to be for us. Pass that junk down here. Sorry. Pass that on down. And Carmen?

Yes? What's your bid? Do you want to bid less or do you want to challenge Greg? He get all eight names, which is quite a few. If I challenge him, I save myself, right? No, you'll lose if he can actually name it after hearing eight names. That's a lot of names. Oh, then I guess I have to go for seven.

Okay. That's going to be her bid, everybody. Shut up. Let's say hi to Trey Galleon, everyone. He's sitting next to Carmen. Hey, everyone. Hi, everyone. Hey, everyone. Hey, everyone.

Trey is my friend from we met in Austin, and now he lives here in New York City and is available for children's events. Keeping Brooklyn weird, man. Yeah. The kids hate a new gentrified Brooklyn. They like the old character. Yeah, man.

Jesse grabbing a mic from professionals. Stepping up. Stone semi-drunk professionals. But still, man. What did you bring for the prize-making, Trey? I brought a copy of my CD, The Moronic, which is available

at all the fine outlets. A half a thing of bamboos. Yep, a half a package of bamboo papers. And then last time I went down to Philly, we went shooting guns. And so I brought the target from our gun shooting outing in Philly.

Well, let me see. What is it? That is so weird. Yeah. Look at how many times he shot the child. Look, man. I don't know that fucking kid, man. All right?

I don't know what he's up to. After I took care of the guy with the gun, then you go after the weird kid and lady. Also, shouldn't it be a thousand points for just shooting the gun itself? Instead, you get more points for murder. Yeah, man. Nobody came out and

high-fived me or anything. And I hit the gun a lot, you got. I'm good with guns. What can I say? That's not real popular nowadays, I know. I'll just be quiet. From 20 yards, though, all right? Okay, so that's it.

You practically, it's like you brought a name tag, but you're playing for someone else. Right. Oh, and then everybody signed it. Did I mention that already? Oh, that's cool. Yeah, yeah. Three people cared that everyone signed it.

More people signed it than cared about it. Hey, man. I didn't book the lineup, all right? The winner's gonna get something about it. Hey, man. I didn't book the lineup, all right? The winner's going to get something from each of us regardless. Something. Thank you very much, Trey. And what's your... Who am I playing for? Yeah.

I'm playing for K. What's this? Describe the... Oh, is it donuts? It's a cookie. No, it's a cookie, but it's in a donut box. So I think that qualifies that we could throw it, yeah? You're going to just break off a piece?

Oh, no. Were we not supposed to do that? They didn't even have a chance to put their plastic tarps up, Trey. Oh, were you supposed to yell that? So it's full on. Yeah, just get in there. It's very donut-y.

Yeah, yeah. Try to throw something in Amy Adams' mouth. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Get that mouth. Yes! Anybody else want to throw? No, somebody got that mouth right away. Mission accomplished.

Rob Cantrell, everybody. Everybody. But first, Trey has to bid. Oh, no. I'm not bidding, man. I'm getting Carmen to name this shit. It's personal. She knocked me off last year, so back at you. All right.

This could be interesting. I mean, it is interesting I just want to note that I had the first elimination last year I knocked out John Hodgman so if I go out now I think that's that's penance really for having done that well there's no chance for you to go out right now so

so just relax back there and keep your eye on the puck. I'm going to give you seven names from a movie from 2004, Carmen. One and a half stars from Leonard. It won the Golden Razzie. It won the Worst Movie of the Year award from the Razzies for 2004. And the clues were that it's a nonsensical story concept, illogical in the extreme, sets up impossible relationships, and gives us a heroine who's scarcely worth rooting for.

Scathing. And your seven names are Byron Mann, Michael Massey, Alex Borstein, Francis Conroy, Lambert Wilson, Sharon Stone, Benjamin Bratt, and one name remains. What is the name of the film, Carmen? Sharon Stone

Sharon Stone? Uh-huh Sharon Stone is third build Benjamin Bratt above her one person remains and the film is called damn I thought it was showgirls for a while but

it's not that one she made when she showed her thing because that was first of all who oh I don't know. Oh, Carmen. Are you going to feel mad about this experience if you go home right away?

I feel like I should have had you name the movie. You mean Catwoman? Was it Catwoman? No, that was... Oh. It was Catwoman. But you weren't going to guess that was, what's, oh. It was Catwoman. But you weren't going to guess that ever, right? Huh?

You would never have guessed that. No, I was, I was sexist. I was looking for a guy as the lead. That was bad. I wasn't thinking it was, what's her face? Yeah. Halle Berry. Halle Berry.

Yeah. Oh, that's sad I hate to leave I'm so sorry this happened to you You're such a delight to have around Just leave and then come back as Pete Davidson Can I be Pete Davidson? Pass over your name tag

And let's also get Hang on a second Hang on a second Hang on a second We're reevin' That's not the cue to do that She gets to do a plug She gets to plug something she's got going on Coming up

Like anything I'm in Detroit this weekend You can do better You can do better. You can do better than that. Do a bigger, you know, what's your Twitter handle? At Lynch Carmen. Lynch Carmen. L-Y-N-C-H. So I have to be Lynch Carmen.

Yeah. So look for Lynch Carmen on Twitter, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you. Carmen Lynch. Yeah, that's where that's going to come in. I love their enthusiasm

for it. When you have a cannon ready to go, it's kind of exciting to be able to do it. Get an itchy trigger finger. Alright, one spoiled bratty child gone. Felt so good knocking her out. Ten beautiful, wonderful children left, if I may paraphrase Willy Wonka.

All right. So let's meet Rob Cantrell, everybody. Oh, Rob. Good to be here. How are you, Doug? Oh, I'm doing great. This is super fun so far. So far, so good.

Yeah, yeah. I'm really mad at Greg Wisniewski for yelling out the answer before. It's very rude. Throwing the cake. That was fun. I'm going to put him in the penalty box. Put him in the penalty box. Rob, you won last year.

Of course, your favorite for this year. Who is your lucky person that you're playing for? I'm playing for Paul. And he made a Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. I think you should put that on. Yeah, I'll put this on. Does it fit over your hair? Does it fit over your white fro? Oh, look at that.

Wow, that's like... It's like if the Klan... It's like a cuter version of the Klan. This guy is the whitest guy in the world. He's just made of sugar. Now go out there and amble down the street. Did that look creepy? Yeah, it looked

kind of like a hood. Also, when the hat came up, it was packed. Inside of it was packed with a barrel, a barrel pillow, which I've never seen before. Could you hold up the barrel pillow for a second? Yeah, this is Paul's barrel pillow. I'm sure he's humped it a few times.

That's a cool pillow. It is a nice pillow. I did want to take a nap. I mean, you're giving that up. You must be a millionaire. Yeah. You're not necessarily giving it up. You could get it back.

Yeah, but he's got not. I'm taking it. Yeah. It's a good pillow, you're right. So I'm playing for Paul. Okay, and what'd you bring for the prize bag? My hip-hop CD. It's called Dreams Never Die.

And the track I'm really obsessed with right now is called... I listen to my own shit. I love my own shit. This track is called Breakdance War. And it's about apocalyptic breakdance battle. And the whole world is saved by breakdancers. And this one female breakdancer wins it all.

And she's the best breakdancer ever. Because breakdancing will save the universe. Oh, that's your song? And that's what that song's about so check it out it's called dreams never die and on the cover is a pelican with laser beams coming out of his eyes and you can listen to it on spotify and i'll make two cents and uh so please thank you pass that shit down and um i it. Pass it around. It's going in the bag.

Rob gets to pick the first category in this next round. We're coming to you, Ramon. Rob, do you want Go Bananas? That's movies that have the word apes in the title. Let me give you an example. apes in the title.

And let me give you an example. Yeah, that needs illustration. We can't conceive of that. What? Because, okay, I won't give you an example then. Well, but you mean like the truncated word ape could be in there like eating Gilbert Grape, right? Yeah, if it was called eating Gilbert Grapes.

Oh. Should be a better title anyway. Because it's got apes in the title. That's the sequel. Or Fastbatch Cumberbender, which is movies with Michael Fassbender or Benedict Cumberbatch.

Fastbatch Cumberbander. Or finally, at WebMonkeyDave suggested points! And that's movies with the word midnight in the title. Let's go with points. Let's go with points.

Alright, crowd favorite. This movie is from 1980. Leonard calls it a bomb. He says it's an idiotic comedy. And it's nothing to stay up for, which is interesting. You know, what if you're at a matinee? He says it's nothing to stay up for.

And he lists six people. Six people. Merely six people. Six people. Merely six people. So how many names do you think you'd need, Rob, to figure this one out? I would say five. It's going to take five names. Let's meet our next contestant. First time guest on the show.

Yeah, it's Ramon Rivas II. Everybody, you know I like to use a full title. What's your middle name, Ramon? I don't have one. Oh, okay. So they went nuts with the second part. Yeah. And I said, we don't need a middle name

because he's Ramon Rivas II. Second in a series of two. Yeah. And where are you living now? You live here? No, I still live in Cleveland. Oh, you're in Cleveland. So we met in Cleveland. Yeah, we smoke weed on the roof.

We've been on a roof. We spent some time on a roof together. And you're just visiting New York while you're on tour? Yeah, I got selected for the New York Comedy Festival as a comic to watch for this year. Thank you. And then you asked me to do this, so I just slept on couches the rest of the month. That sounds great.

Yeah, but I've been doing shit. I did Seth's show. I did a bunch of stuff around town, so it was super cool. What have you brought for us tonight for the prize bag? I brought three things. I brought two joints because I didn't have anything physically with me. And then

I do a comedy festival in Cleveland called Accidental Comedy Fest. And if you come to Cleveland, you can have a pass to go to it. So they just have to write to you on Twitter or something? Well, I have a bracelet in my bag that'll just get... Oh, okay. So if you want to come to Cleveland... All right, well, I don't generally give weed to people but uh

it's tobacco it's tobacco yeah it's from you yeah okay I just touched it to verify it's realness

because I'm a drug Doug and what who are you playing for uh i'm playing for katie and she made this big alien oh katie and then it's k yeah it's a stretch uh but it's like instead of alien it's katie but this is like fucking crafty as shit that's so awesome it's really beautiful and then like the clip on the inside looks like the little alien that comes out. Yeah. Like it's very next level design.

I don't know how she does this shit. It also does look like a very hungry black cock. Yeah. Little gray ball sack on the bottom. It does. We know what kind of porn she likes. Well, Ramon, I think you did the best at picking a name tag and selecting items for the gift bag.

So congratulations on that. But we do have to, you're in a situation here alright so Rob bid five names do you think you can do it in less or do you need to challenge Rob to name the film I can he said five? yeah he went five

in 1980 with a midnight in the title I will challenge Rob. Okay. It happens to the best of them. He went all the way last time. Now he's down to this. Five names.

The movie's a bomb. It's from 1980. Leonard calls it an idiotic comedy. Oh, shit. Yeah. And he says, nothing to stay up for. A nap is better, according to Leonard.

And your five names are Stephen First, Maggie Roswell, Brad Wilkin, Eddie Deason, and Deborah Clinger. Not Winger. Clinger, the great Deborah Clinger. Obvious. It's obvious.

What do you think, Rob? Do you have any idea? It's a tough one, I've got to say. It's 1980. It's gotta say. It's 1980. It's a comedy. It's Midnight. It's in the titles somewhere. Yeah.

So it's... Shit. Midnight Cowboy? Oh. I know that's not a comedy. The guy in the audience agrees with that answer. That was the only Midnight movie I knew. That and Midnight Run.

Midnight Cowboy is like a best picture, like idiotic comedy. Go to bed instead of watching Midnight Cowboy. I'm going to say that's not a bad guess because maybe they did like a TV movie remake of Midnight Cowboy in 1980. But maybe it was like Led Zeppelin, man. They didn't get it the first time around. You know, Led Zeppelin's man. They didn't get it the first time around. You know? Led Zeppelin's first album got no stars in Rolling Stone. I thought maybe it was something like that.

You know, at least you went out in a blaze of glory. You had great arguments. I had a lot of fun. You had a lot of fun. It was a good scene back there in the dressing room. I threw some cake. If you don't mind waiting around, we'll get high again after. Does this prove that you could be a grand winner by chance?

It could happen. Rob was very strategic last year. But the film, in this case, is called Midnight Madness. Midnight Madness, the film debut, I think, of Michael J. Fox. But he didn't make the cut on that list. Want to plug something, Rob, before you go? Yeah, just check out my album, Dreams Never Die. I'm doing ASCET next week at the UCB on Sunday.

So I'm psyched about that. I'm proud of that. I'm doing an Alzheimer's benefit at the With Hotel on the 15th. Check out my calendar, robcantrell.com. Thank you, Doug. Ladies and gentlemen, Rob Cantrell.com thank you Doug ladies and gentlemen Rob Cantrell vindicated I feel like I'm vindicated somehow in that

where's his name tag pass his name tag down here oh it's that thing does it have a shithead on it oh no it's got a note on it Kurt stole the pillow part Oh wait the note's on

Oh the note's on there Oh damn it It felt used It felt used Like only in the way That flannel things Can feel Like fucking weirdly used

Did it feel Did it feel wet It like yeah Cause flannel After like ten years Flannel's just like I don't care anymore. I'm just like moss on your bed.

What? Yeah, take it, Flannel lovers. Let's say hi to Seth Herzog. Hi, everybody. Thank you. Very excited to be back. It's great to have you back. Both nips are on fire.

I'm so psyched to be here. Yeah. You get to pick the next category. Yes, I'm psyched about that. And then we're going to go to Kurt. Yeah. I took the note off of the pillow, Kurt. There you go.

Just to hold on to it. I didn't like feeling it for the short time I had it in my hands. Yeah. It's lumpy and wet. But you'll be nice if you just cut a little hole in there, Kurt. Yeah. Whoa, that's weird for you guys? We didn't pay to watch no pillow fuckers.

I don't know why I gave you guys that accent. No shit I think cocaine on it. Is that your cocaine pillow? It's a low-grade coke. It's a low-grade Coke. It's a low-grade. That was nasty. All right, Seth. I feel like I'm going to win now.

That was some good luck dust. It's all how you put it. Quickly, before Seth's nose starts bleeding and he passes out. Oh, I should say I'm playing for Tim. Oh, there's that giant Tim Curry head. Giant Tim Curry head. Who doesn't like giant Tim Curry head?

I'm very partial to Tim Curry and I love the Tim Curry head and the guy's name is Tim. So there you go. I think he's very sick too. What? In honor of Tim, yeah. He had a stroke a few years ago. He had a stroke, yeah.

Oh, Tim Curry. Not the Tim who I'm playing for. I thought you were trying to play that Tim is dying in the audience. We really need Tim to win, guys. When I got this name tag from him, he looked very sick. He could barely hold up this giant Tim Curry head. All right, and then what did you bring for the prize bag? I know everyone is going to be very excited about this.

It's the full season of the Starz original series Survivor's Remorse. Does anyone know what that is? Is that like Holocaust Survivor? No, you think Holocaust Survivor, right? It's a wacky comedy about basketball players. What? Yeah, this is a wacky comedy about basketball players. What? Shut up. Yeah, this is a wacky comedy about basketball players.

And there are quotes. People love this thing. The New York Times said, Survivor's remorse is a mordant and very funny. Not suitable for sensitive or humorless audiences. Yeah, comedy is terrible for humorless people. The Washington Post said, Screamingly funny.

The cast is terrific. TV Guide, and we all watch everything from TV Guide. Disarming winner. Bracingly timely. Those are two adjectives that don't go well together. Hence the job at TV Guide. Are you running your next set by us right now? I am. I would, except

for the fact that I'm going to give this up. Wall Street Journal says a rare thing in television, a wholly unexpected pleasure, which I guess is what Kurt think about that pillow. Right now, you're forcing us to read more of this than anybody has ever read that's owned that particular

thing in your hand, has read less of those quotes. So it's the full series of Survivors of Morrison stars. Thank you very much for that. That's terrific. What else did you... That's all you guys are getting. Doug doesn't want to deal with it. It's a wonderful item. Yeah. Really appreciate

it. Second place last year. Your foe, your first place competitor last year is already gone. Yeah. You must feel great about that. I feel awesome about that. Yeah.

You've been vindicated. I'm wondering what song of his own he's going to be obsessed with next year. We'll see. Might not get invited back. You know, we only bring back the top players. You get to pick categories. Okay. You get to choose between...

F. Byhop suggested Five Not Alive, and that's the films of John Cazale, because he was in five noteworthy films and is no longer alive. I like where he went with that. Yep, okay. It's a sad one because he was a great actor,

but he was great in everything he was in. He's probably the most perfect actor of all time. I think he's the only actor whose entire filmography is Best Picture nominees. Yeah, exactly.

And he was great in them, got nominated for Oscars for most of his performances in them. So tribute to him. This category is not going to get picked. Lau Grith, G-R-I-T-H, suggested Ant-Man, but he spelled Ant-A-U-N-T. What? Yeah. Yeah, so believe it or not, Kurt, this is films about cross-dressing.

Films about cross-dressing. Films that include cross-dressing. I shouldn't say about cross-dressing because aren't they all? And finally, S. Dwyer 731 suggested My Scythe. And that's movies

that have the Grim Reaper in them So which one of those Would you like to play Seth? As much as the John Cazale Sounds really interesting I'm going to go with the cross-dressing That's how you say his name?

Cazale? Cazale, yeah Okay, I don't think so It's the whimsical pronunciation What's that? It's the whimsical pronunciation Yeah, well that? It's the whimsical pronunciation. Yeah, well, how do you pronounce it, Jesse? Oh, Kazal.

Kazal? Are you sure it's Kazal? I think it's Kazali. Oh, really? He's Italian. Oh, yeah. You say the at the end, right? I say it, Kazales.

But there's no S at the end. Well, he's a diamond. Oh, he's Italian? I just wish we could ask De Niro. He probably knows. I'm a De Niro. He probably knows. I'm a De Niro. I'm a De Niro.

All right. Which one do you want, Seth? Cross-dressing. Cross-dressing, okay. Yeah, let's get for cross-dressing. Exciting. Right? Everyone's into that. A lot of CD-ers up there, right?

Yeah. One and a half stars from Leonard for this movie that has cross-dressing in it. He says that it's incredibly tiresome. And he says someone in an unbilled cameo provides Oh, shit.

Provides easily the film's funniest moments are provided by someone in an unbilled cameo. provides easily the film's funniest moments or provided by someone in an unbilled cameo I'm not going to say who because I think that might be too much of a clue and Leonard lists a few names he lists

four, six, nine thirteen names can you give me a year on that? 13 names. Yes, of course. The year is 1995. 13 names. How many names do you think it'll take to get this?

Ross dressing movie. I am going to name it in... How many total? 13? 13 names. I'll do six. Six names, he says, as we introduce. He's spoken on the mic a few times this evening, but let's interview him for a second.

It's Kurt Braunohler, everybody! Ba-ba-ba-ba-bam! Ba-ba-ba-ba-bam! Great to be here, Doug. Thanks for having me. Thank you for being here. You always light up the room, and so does your sign tonight. It's giant. You picked a big light-up sign.

It's like a metaphor for you. And what is it? I'm playing for Ted, and this is the Royal Teddenbombs. And it's a beautiful poster from the movie Royal Teddenbombs, where Ted has taken different ages of his life and photoshopped them over everyone's head other than a few characters. Owen Wilson and an owl. For the kids.

And a dog. For the kids, is it like him as a little kid? It's not Morgan Freeman. It's Danny Glover. Boom. Danny Glover. The reason I didn't name it was fear of getting it wrong.

All black actors matter, guys. Excited to play for him. He did a great job. All right. And what was the other question I'm supposed to ask you? What did I bring for everybody? I just came from New Jersey. And so I brought...

Thank you very much, guys. And I brought a bunch of specialties. New Jersey is known for its smoked meat and so I wanted to bring a few. I got this one. This is the original beef stick. So there's one of those. There we go.

I also have, I have the Jack Link's original beef stick. Didn't want to leave out, Southern New Jersey gets left out all the time, the pineys and whatnot, so I got a supersized beef stick. What are you going to say, Trenton? Trenton doesn't get represented?

A beef stick for Trenton. And then just some jerky dip, which is jerky that you dip. You put it in your... It's in a dip box. You can listen. That proves I grew up in Jersey that I can pack dip.

And it all comes in a... Like a ceremonial tourist bag from Jersey from Quick Check. Okay. That's a lot of sticks. That's a ton of sticks, bro. Yeah. Well done. All right.

The bid currently is, he said six names out of 13. And what is the category again? The category is cross-dressing. One and a half stars from Leonard. 1995. Incredibly tiresome. Cameo's the funniest part. I don't know what people in the audience are saying.

Oh, sorry. What was it doing? It shines in are saying. Oh, sorry. What was it doing? It shines in their face. Oh, put it back. I mean, look, it's pretty bright. It's so horrible, yeah. And it's also such a wide swath of the audience. It really is horrible.

Wow, it really is. Could you find some Nazis? It is. It's like you're all on a prison break, and you don't know how to do it right. You've all sat down, and the pigs are, they're all,

they're there. I mean, that's the best way to do it. You freak them out enough. They're dumb. They're guards, you know? Okay. I was right. I said you'd light up a room,

and you were shining it right in their eyes. So, yeah. So six names out of 13, he says, on this cross-dressing movie from 1995. Can you go less names, or do you want to challenge Mr. Herzog? I'll challenge him. All right.

Challenge is on. One of these two gentlemen is going home. He was not happy about that choice, I could tell. I'll challenge him. All right. Challenge is on. One of these two gentlemen You was not happy about that choice, I could tell. I know, because I have a feeling it's one movie,

but it's literally the only movie I know that's cross-dressing. So that's, my brain always does that and it's always wrong. All right. We'll see what happens.

If I put money on people, I would bet on Seth right now. Then that would be the right bet. Two fans, thank you very much. Here's the six names. Third. Here's the six names. And audience, don't shriek too much when you figure out the name of this movie.

Your six names from the bottom of 13 are... Your six names from the bottom of 13 are Julie Newmar, Quentin Crisp, Naomi Campbell, RuPaul, Beth Grant, and Blythe Danner. What's the name of the movie?

To Wong Fu, my friends. Full title! Full title! Full title! Yeah, full title, please. Oh, my lord. Another technicality. To Wong Fu, thanks for everything.

Julie Newmar? That's correct. My nips are erect! I, uh... Did you guys see the sequel to Wong Fu and Thanks for All the Fish? I'm out! On that. What are your plugs, Kurt Barber?

My plugs are... My Hour is coming out on Comedy Central next year. Yes. And listen to my podcast. It's called The K-Hole. And I blindfold people and I drive them places and then we talk about a lot of different other stuff. All right, thank you very much. Good night. Ladies and gentlemen, Kurt Braunohler.

Yeah, Kurt. Good job, buddy. Who did this belong to? You might as well come get it right now. So we stop shining it on people's faces. Great job, dude. All right. Yeah, I'm going to leave it off. A lot of people said no. Women, too. I just feel like if you take your shirt off,

it's off the whole night. It's a total power move. The light is shining up your pale skin I feel like you're all getting a tan Off how pale I am right now Hey Karate Chris Take my pants off fine Next time I get one right He will do it

Next time he gets one right his pants are coming off Something for you guys to look forward to Suffer through that Chris this doesn't have a shit in on the back does it Am I missing it Chris His pants are coming off. Something for you guys to look forward to. Suffer through that. Chris, this doesn't have a shithead on the back, does it? Am I missing it, Chris? It doesn't? Can you put one on there for me?

I want you to get a shithead at the end. Here, here, here. Make it happen, you guys. And while you do that, I'm going to to do this Let's meet our next contestant Doogie Horner Thank you Thank you, Doug Great to be here

Thank you for coming And what have you been up to? What's going on? You've been hanging out here patiently I'll give you a chance to talk for a second. Thank you. My wife and I... What did you bring for the prize bag?

Nobody cares what I've been up to? Everybody thought I was going to say, my wife. What did you and your wife do? No, forget about it. It's okay. I mean, I guarantee you I'll forget about it, but No, no, forget about it. It's okay. It doesn't matter. I mean, I guarantee you I'll forget about it,

but I'd like to hear about it first. We went to a 24-hour horror movie marathon in Philly that Exhumed Films does every year. Just a bunch of different ones or sequels, or were they themed in any way other than horror?

No, they don't tell you ahead of time what they're going to show, so it's some stuff you've seen before, like good movies like Near Dark, and then it's some horrible shit you've never heard of before, like horror at Party Beach. We're Gonna Eat You was really good. It was a cannibal kung fu film.

They showed Godzilla in 1985, which is bad. But there's one great part. Right after Godzilla has risen from the sea, everybody in Japan is freaking out, and they cut to the scene with all these government people, and they're freaking out, and somebody goes, hold on, hold on, hold

on. Look, just because Godzilla has risen from the sea doesn't mean he's going to attack Tokyo. Everyone's like, ah. He's done it every time. It could just be one night. Check out the scene. Maybe he'll go to Cleveland.

Yeah. What do you got for the prize bag? Your book. My book. Love this book. Some very interesting cats perhaps you weren't aware of. Yeah. It's available where?

Where can people get it? it's available all over the place it's in the barnes and noble power aisle right now i didn't know they had a power aisle but they said your book's in the power aisle i said oh good i think that's like the central aisle so um you can get it online or it's even better if you can go to your local bookstore like The Strand or wherever to support local businesses. Yeah. Doogie Horner. Who are you playing for? I am playing for Josh Rassic Park.

It's a pretty crappy sign. And it was way in the back. And I always try to go for the crappy signs in the back because I feel like that's what I would do. That's very nice of you. Yeah, real people make crappy signs. It looks like his scissors were super dull. Like it's 8 1⁄2 by 11, but then he clipped it with like really dull scissors.

And he used four pieces of tape to attach it to this cardboard, like, bare minimum effort. Well, I like it, and especially the timing of it's interesting because you get to pick between three categories, and the first option is Jurassic World. Oh. And that's movies that had senior citizens in them.

That's movies that had senior citizens in them who won a Golden Globe for their performance. Yeah, Jurassic World. Golden Globe, old Golden Globe, yeah. Or Ghostbusters, and that's films where Patrick Swayze is arrested. So dumb. And Matthew McConaughey, which is Matthew McConaughey movies that have made over $100 million at the box office.

Which one of those would you like? That's a tough one. You can doogie it. I guess I'll go for Jurassic World since that's the most thematically appropriate for my sign. 1989 is the year. Leonard calls this movie

genteel, entertaining, and he says it was a best Oscar winner for makeup. Oh. Yeah, and he lists five names, just five names.

It's a lot of old people. I guess it's hard to get the makeup and all the cracks and all the nooks and crannies. That's why I won an Oscar. How many out of five do you think it'll take you? Five. He's taking all five, which is a smart move

when you've got the gentleman sitting next to you that you do. Well, yeah, he's like the best player. You're playing into... It's Jesse Pasternak, everybody. Thank you. Great to be back. Thank you. Great to be back. Thank you. Thanks for being here.

How's school in Indiana going? It's going great. I'm taking a class that's devoted solely to Federico Fellini, so I have to watch one of his films every week, and it's just been wonderful. Well, I sure hope he comes up as a category tonight. Take off your shirt! wonderful. Well, I sure hope he comes up as a category tonight. Oh, no. Don't yell at my other guests.

That's a child! Yeah. Someone arrest that priest. Put a spotlight on that guy. That guy's a child molester. Spotlight, the movie he was most recently in. Yeah. That guy. Guy was a child molester. Spotlight, the movie he was most recently in. Yeah. That guy. I love that song from E.T.

Turn on your spotlight. Shine it on every priest rapist that you see. Alright. Jesse, who are you playing for? I'm playing for Devin. His poster is My Blue Devin. And Doug, you're Rick Moranis.

It's the My Blue Heaven poster. And Devin, who looks a lot like Craig Kikowski, is Steve Martin. Okay. That's a good one. Yep. You like that movie that he's based that on? Oh, I do. My Blue Heaven?

I do, yeah. It's really great. And she interviewed the same guy. It's based on the same guy who did Goodfellas. So Nora Ephron would interview him right after Nick Pelleggi. So that's a fun fact.

It is. That is a fun fact. Super fun. And what'd you bring for the prize bag? Well, today is Mandy Patinkin's birthday. Of course it is. And what'd you bring for the prize bag? Well, today is Mandy Patinkin's birthday, so I brought this. Of course it is. That's why we're all here.

Somewhere over the rainbow. All right, go ahead. So I brought his best movie, The Princess Bride, which is... My name is Eddierico Batalha I'm here to get you That's not how it goes Close I'm here to slice your face off

No that's not cut That's not the line You say the same thing every time Third time Dougie Why are you out living Mandy? And then the other one You came and you gave without taking The last one is

Today is Jonathan Swift's birthday And I brought his pamphlet A A Modest Proposal, which says that the people of Ireland should sell their babies to the British for food. Thank you. That is a modest proposal. Yeah. So if you ever wanted to read that, you know, it's here for you, and it was written by a guy in the 18th century, so that's good. So you know it's good. Sign it.

Sign it, Jonathan Swift. A modest proposal by Jesse Pasternak. Well, thank you for bringing all that stuff and for picking a good name tag, and now you're in it to win it. Doogie says he needs all five

names. What are you going to do about that? I'm going to say two. Two names. Well, this is a terrible thing to have to say hi to my favorite person on the panel. We're finally saying hello to you. Hi. It's Aparna N. Sherla, everybody.

Hello. Hello. She's been so patient. I have. I really have to pee, too. Really? Yeah. Well, as soon as you can take a break right after this. Yeah. I feel

really good about it. It might be a permanent one. Yeah. But do you, well, let's ask you first who you're playing for. I'm playing for Alex and the City. A fun pun for a pun-driven movie. Is Alex a dude or a girl? He's a dude. He's a dude. He's a man.

I was going to go with the Alex wears Prada. Yeah. No, he did the tagline, too. It says, get Alexed away. Yeah. I don't know what that means. I think the original was Get Carried Away. Because their name's Carrie.

It adds up. Yeah. Do a little digging. It made sense. And what did you bring for the prize, Maddie? I brought some real game changers. Here. I brought a painting of a buffalo.

It's very nice. Called Roaming by D. John Hammer, signed. If you don't know, I'm sorry. I'm not going to explain it. And then I brought a sarong, unworn. And then I brought a sarong, unworn. I'm not going to name which country it's from because I don't support that kind of labor. And then I have a three-day guest pass to Crunch.

Yeah. And two frozen yogurt, buy one, get one free, 16 handles. Yay. free 16 handles yogurt and working out a date night for yourself well I feel terrible that it came down to this that you're going up against Jesse you can't fight fate I should have told you ahead of time

don't sit next to Jesse but he says he can name this movie with only two names. He seems pretty confident. If you have an idea what this movie is, you could bid less names, but I don't know if you're feeling it at this point. I already forgot the category. Let's recap it all. It's a senior citizen, was in this movie and won a golden

globe for their efforts uh it also won an oscar for makeup and uh leonard gave it three stars from 1989 he calls it genteel and entertaining and he listed five names j Jesse says he can do it with two names. Okay. Okay. I guess I'll say one. All right. She's saying one name. That means she's sticking around for a second. But do you want to run to the restroom while we talk to Elliot?

No, I feel good about how long I'll be up here. Okay. I thought that was going to be Trash talking about me, and then it turned into the opposite of that. Yeah. From Flophouse Podcast, it's Elliot Kalin, everybody. Thanks for having me. Thank you, man.

Thank you for waiting it out. We're finally getting around to the bottom of the order, as they say. I feel like I got a free ticket to see the Doug Loves Movies show. From like a weird onstage seat, like Spring Awakening or something. I'm at a production of Copenhagen and I couldn't get the seats

in the actual audience. Yeah, yeah. And you, of course, also write for a television program. I do not any longer, but I used to. But you still should take a lot of credit for when you did. Oh, sure, yeah. Yeah. How many Emmys did you win personally?

Well, there's staff writing Emmys, so if you talk to the New York Times marriage announcement editors, none of them are admissible. Really? I have... You can't... For being on a staff

that won for best writing, that doesn't count? They said that... I put it in and they said, you didn't win those for individual achievements, so we're not going to list them. We will list that you played

a character named Doodle Von Tainstein. So that was in the Times. I would have made the same choice if it was down to those two. But how many did you claim to have won? Four. Yeah, there you go.

And I got to give the speech this year. Yeah, that's right. You got to actually talk, and Jon Stewart stood in the back like a nobody. I finally got to throw my weight around. Yeah, that was pretty sweet. Congratulations on that. And who are you playing for tonight?

I am playing for Damien, specifically, or maybe it's pronounced Damien, Damien Omen 2, my second favorite of the Omen movies, after Omen 3. Interesting. Yeah.

I love how many scenes there are in it of Sam Neill yelling at a crucifix. Just yell. It's like the first Tim Burton Batman where the Joker spends a lot of time yelling at the TV about how Batman spoiled his crimes, except instead of the Joker,

it's the Antichrist, who is also a senator, I think, or a presidential candidate or a president or something. And instead of Batman, it is the Christ. So, you know, it's the Antichrist, who is also a senator, I think, or a presidential candidate or a president or something. And instead of Batman, it is the Christ. So, you know, it's... And then at the end, the Antichrist almost kills the newborn savior until at the last minute he's stabbed with a bunch of magic knives

and then God appears and fixes everything. And so you're like, wait a minute, God. You let a lot of people run around the world collecting magic knives when you could have stepped in at any moment so anyway that's the third movie though this is the second one what happens to the magic knives magic knives you mean like horcruxes uh kind of i guess so it's the same story harry pot Potter's lifted from Omen 3? I never put the dots together until now, yeah. All right, so what was the other question? The bag.

Yeah, what did you bring for the bag? I got two questions I have to ask. I can't get through it. But this is the last time I have to do it. For now. It's holiday time, and the holidays for me mean gifts, I guess. And so I brought gifts for the gift bag. It was not as specific a segue as I thought it would be.

I have two entries today from the Things That Used To Be On My Desk Until I Cleaned It Today collection. These are two action figures. They were given to me by friends that I hope are not listening to this episode. The first is the Dawn of the Dead Hare Krishna zombie action figure. Nice. Solid action figure. That is nice. I'd keep it.

I don't have room on my desk. And the second is from the 90s Fantastic Four animated show, the Human Torch. fantastic for an animated show, The Human Torch. He has flame-on sparking action and a catapult launcher, which is the next best thing to being able to launch fire at your friends. And so these two characters have never met

in canon stories, but now you can have your own intercompany crossover between Marvel and George Romero on your own table. Oh, here we go. Those are some nice prizes. Thank you very much

for bringing those. Thank you to whoever takes them from me and has opened up more space on my desk to work. I think everything's going to fit in the bag. It's going to be heavy, but everything's going to fit. We got it all now.

And we've gone through everybody. And Elliot finally gets to step up to the plate. Aparna has bid one name in this film. I've got an idea about it. Can you go zero or, dare I say it, negative names? I think I would like to purely because it would be such an inspiring moment if she pulled

it through after this amazing challenge it's something I think we all take away with us the rest of our lives and it would be something we could cling to in moments of trial when we're not quite sure if we can do it and then we remember no she did it she made it happen and I can't take away that moment of inspiration

from people in the future. So I'm going to save my own skin and challenge. Okay, so you get one name. And do you think you need the clues again, or are you good? I'm good. All right. Your one name is Esther Roll. Esther Roll.

The Esther Roll? The Esther Roll. Well, I only... 1989. Okay. Old person won an Oscar. That's the key thing to keep in mind. Driving Miss Daisy. That is correct. See to keep in mind. Driving Miss Daisy.

That is correct. See, she did it. She did it. Wow. It's a holiday miracle. Take off your shirt. Wow. It's a holiday miracle. I know. Take off your shirt. Take off your shirt.

I don't have a shirt underneath. Neither do I. But I don't. It's all bones under there. You can double thank me when that inspiring story is adapted for film. I really only had one guess, period. That was amazing. Terrific job.

Elliot, anything you'd like to plug? We hardly knew ye. Oh, thanks, everybody. Well, I've really enjoyed being here. And it's been great to spend so much time away from my family. Well, we'll drag you away from your family again very soon. Ladies and gentlemen, Elliot Kalin. Thank you. Actually, if I could... What?

I will just plug the Flophouse podcast, which I should have done. Yeah, I mentioned it earlier. You mentioned it at the top. Flophouse. Flophouse podcast, which I should have done. Yeah, I mentioned it earlier. You mentioned it at the top. Flophouse. Flophouse podcast. Oh, I got one more thing. Okay, now I'm milking it. And my limited series for Marvel, Spider-Man and the X-Men,

continues to be in a collected edition at bookstores where they sell collected editions of comic books. So please pick that up. Thank you. they sell collected editions of comic books. So please pick that up. Thank you. We don't have an orchestra,

so they just hit the cannon again. If your speech goes too long at the end. And do you want to go ahead and make water, Miss Daisy? Seth, how's the temperature in here? It is cold as ever. You can cut diamonds on these bad boys now. Can you tell, Doogie? I can just see your back.

Which is nice. Can you see my nips through my back? Because they're so hard right now. Your nipples are so hard, I can see them through your back Which is nice Can you see my nips through my back Because they're so hard right now Your nipples are so hard I can see them through your back Nice Sorry it's gross Gross thing to say Do you want the fuck bag

I can't believe you guys are Kurt forgot his fuck bag It's so gross The thigh pillow Oh gross And he put it between his thighs right away The Grinch dove away from that thing Seth's had some cookie crumbs in his chest hair

And it's the sexiest fucking thing I've ever seen They're cake crumbs and it is very sexy Dear Gramercy Theater, may I have a Tito's and soda? Thank you very much in advance. Does anybody else need something to drink? You all good? Get some waters for Seth

and Ramon. Let's move on. We go back. Don't change your seating order so we don't change the order. But we're back at Greg, back at the top of the order. He gets to pick the next category, and then we'll come to you, Trey. All right. So be ready.

Yeah. Greg, would you like a streetcar named Retire? And that's people's last movies. I mean, yeah, retirement is sad, but in this case, they probably died. The World According to ARF, and that's movies that are narrated by a dog. And C underscore Mattel suggested Sour Diesel. Sour Diesel. And that's Vin Diesel movies that got two stars or less from Leonard. Thank you very much.

Let's hear it for the staff here at the Gramercy. Oh, my God. They brought me two. That's even better. Thank you so much. That's how great they are around here. People are just running around. I'll probably get seven or eight of them when we're all done.

In the next couple of minutes. I'll take the other one, she says sassily in the front row. And I almost fell into that Donald Trump trap of doing her voice and being racist. He wasn't making fun of that guy having cerebral palsy when he went He wasn't making fun of that guy at all. He was making fun of his

reporting skills. That was his argument. But yeah, I'll probably drink both of those. But thank you for offering. Alright, you can have one. Don't drive. Which one of those categories do you like? Let's go with last movies.

Last movies, all right. The depressing one. The one that made everybody sad. 1981 is. The depressing one. The one that made everybody sad. 1981 is the year. Shit. Three stars from Leonard. He says that it's someone's last feature film.

He also says about it that it was remade for television in 2001. Uh-oh. And he also calls it sometimes simplistic. And he lists only six names. How many names can you get it in? I'll take five, Doug. He says five names, Trey. That's the new stall tactic? Throwing candy at the crowd?

Mo's gonna eat it. Name that movie. All right, he gets five names Fuck And then we say goodbye to Trey Yeah Those five names are William Lanto Dabney Coleman

Doug McKeon Jane Fonda And Henry Fonda In Jane Fonda and Henry Fonda in... Jane Fonda and Henry Fonda? Uh-huh. There were six names? Yeah, there's one more left that you don't get from 1981.

Is it on Golden Pond? It's on Golden Pond, yes. Fuck! You want to hang on to that, Ramone? Trey, man, you're out of here, dude. You lasted a lot longer this time. I know, so that was good. I'm happy about that.

Baby steps. Yeah, total baby steps. Greg knocked me out this time. Do you have anything you want to plug? Yeah, you guys that live here in New York, my show at the Creek in the Cave in Long Island City. Word. That's what I'm saying. It's on Wednesday the 9th.

I got Mike Lawrence, Kevin Barnett, Irene Morales, and me. And it's free. Fuck Wads to show up. Yeah. Me. Nice. Book it. Well done.

Thanks. And then, yeah. Yeah. Book it. Well done. Thanks. Yeah, and thanks for being here and follow him at T-R-E-Y-G-A Trey Sucks, at Trey Sucks on Twitter and then Trey Galleon Instagram on Instagram or whatever I happen to have. Just type in Trey Galleon.

Ladies and gentlemen, Trey Galleon. Thanks, guys. See ya. ladies and gentlemen Trey Gallion thanks guys see ya I don't like that Trey just told me I'll see you in a little bit you're next sucker alright I can't pronounce your name correctly because I can't get the R rolling. Most white people can't. You get to pick between three categories. Would you like...

Where are we on this thing? I said good day? That's Daniel Day-Lewis movies that Leonard gave three stars or more. Because it was a good day. Passenger 50's Eleven. That's movies with Josh Hartnett or Wesley Snipes. Probably not both. Wesley Snipes.

Probably not both. And finally, 5, 8, 8, 2, 300. Empire. Movies that have actors from the TV show Empire. I will go with the Daniel Day-Lewis one. All right.

Three stars from Leonard for this Daniel Day-Lewis. I wouldn't call it a vehicle. I'm not going to say how big his part is. 1997 is the year. Leonard calls this movie powerful, son. He also says it's straightforward, which I recently learned is one word, straightforward. And he says it's stunningly filmed by Chris Menzies.

I hope that's how his name is pronounced. And he lists eight names. I'll go all eight. Ramon Rivas II takes all eight names, Seth Herzog. Yeah. He wants all of them. I know he wants all of them. You're him all of them no i'll do it seven i'll do it in seven he says seven doogie doogie horner has to go less than seven or challenge seth uh says too good i can't i think you'll get it in seven. By the way, Seth,

can I borrow $20? I'll go six. Whoa. Going into Jesse Pasternak. Cool. This is interesting. I like him a lot, Dan Day-Lewis. I'm going to go five. Whoa.

Aparna, Jesse says five names. I think I know what's about to happen. I'll go four. What? Greg Wyshynski, Aparna Nancherla says four names. So I could try to name it, or I could try to perpetuate your run in this game. What run?

I'll say... Yeah, I'll put it on you. I'll say name it. All right. How many was it? Four. You could have said more. You could have tricked me. Alright, you get four names.

Reading from the bottom. The category, of course, is movies where either Josh Hartnett or Daniel Day-Lewis. It's Leonard Maltin gives it three stars or more. So he gave this one three stars. And it's Daniel Day-Lewis, 1997.

Stunningly filmed and powerful and straightforward. And the four names are Kenneth Cranham, Ciaran Fitzgerald, Eleanor Methwin, and Gerard McSorley.

Leaves four names left. But it's a Daniel Day-Lewis thing, you know that. From 1997, what's your guess? Okay. You can do it! This is not right, but I guess Legends of the Fall. I know. You guys thought I knew movies. I don't.

Just driving Miss Daisy. Yeah. I made my guess. That was a good try, but unfortunately, Pete Davidson isn't going to make it tonight. Double it. Well, no, we're good. We got enough people. First ever 11 guests of Christmas.

East Coast. Oh, it's so sad. There was 13 last year. It evened out, fuckers. Thanks, Devin. Yeah, unfortunately, the movie is called The Boxer. This was a tough one.

It would have been tough for anybody. What would you like to plug, Aparna? I'll plug... I have an album coming out in January, so I'll plug that. What's it called? It's called Just Putting This Out There. Okay.

And yeah, look for that. Look for her on Twitter.'s called Just Putting This Out There. Okay. And yeah, look for that. Look for her on Twitter. Tweets are hilarious. Thank you. Ladies and gentlemen, a part of Nancherla. We're getting some good shitheads over here. It's going to be an epic reading of shitheads at the end. Should we all move up front? Everyone, or better, a cluster.

I don't know. This is all right. I don't know how close I want to get to you. We just re-racked like beer pong. Yeah, I like it. It's kind of a little lopsided. The theater may flip over to this side, like the boat in the Poseidon Adventure.

All right. Here we go. Nice reference. Thanks. Thanks, Doogie. You're welcome, Doug. Yeah. See, yours is more fun to say like with some little sarcasm spin on there.

Made my name sound like an insult. Yeah doogie oh geez uh it's harsh listen doogie um as uncalled for why would you say so easy to condescend to you with that name i feel like it's what i'm made for honestly yeah come on doogie let's ask do. I bet he has the answer. Especially if it's about cats. He's met some interesting ones. Perhaps he weren't aware of them. Yeah, good plug. Plug in my book. Plug in my book.

Where are we? What's happening? Who just got knocked out? Aparna got knocked out, so we start with Greg again. This is where, since we're down to five, we're going to switch the order around. So Greg has to play into Jesse. And Greg gets to pick

between these three categories. S. Epitapha Merkison. That's movies where S. Epitapha Merkison dies. Or B.L. BLK Rabbit Coder suggested Darth Hater. And that's movies with James Earl Jones that Leonard gave two stars or less. And Neil Blumpkin suggested...

Oh, he's the guy that suggested Reverse Malton. So if you want, we can play a round of Reverse Malton and you'll have to choose between the titles from that if you choose it so which one of those do you like Greg? Jesse and I literally before the show said that we're both

Reverse Malton fans so we're going to do a round of Reverse Malton alright I love it thank you no problem thank you you're not going to do a round of applause. All right. I love it. Thank you. No problem. Thank you. You're not going to be a fan of your options, I'm afraid. Especially playing with Jesse. But we'll see. It's three Fellini

films. One name. Sad Clown. It's right. All right, whatever. It is going to be tough, because it is all films from, I'll say, the 70s. And your choices are

Serpico, The Godfather Part II, or Bobby Deerfield. Which one of those three films do you think you know the most actors or actresses from for a round of reverse malting? So I'm making a bid now for how many I'll know in the film? You're going to just pick the movie that you think you know the most, and then I'll tell you how many. Godfather Part II. Okay. Thank you.

Excellent choice. Good choice. Because Leonard Liss, it gives you a real good chance here, because Leonard Liss, 22 names. Jeez. So you start the bidding, Greg, with how many names you think you can name. Go four. He says he can name four of the people in Godfather Part 2, Jesse. I'm going to say seven.

Of course you are. So, Doogie, Jesse Pasternak can name seven people from Godfather Part 2. I'm saying that as a fact. Right, right. Yeah, yeah. I'm not, I'm saying that as a fact. Right, right, yeah, yeah. So, do you want to try to name more, or do you want to leave right now?

Do they have to be in order? Do you want to drag this out by a couple of minutes? Yes, the order has to be exactly right. Wait, do they have to be in order, too? No, no, no. It's reverse Malton, so he just has to name. That's how I got out last time, but that's a different game? It's a, no, no. It's reverse Malton. So it's, he just has to name. That's how I got out last, last time, but that's a different game. It's a different thing. Okay. In reverse Malton, you have to wear a shirt. So you're not allowed. I'm always out. I'm always

out. Yeah. What he said, man. Uh, what are you going to do, Doogie? I actually know this So I'm going to say eight He says eight names If they're not in order I just saw it at the Museum of Moving Images So Seth, he can name eight people From the cast of Godfather Part 2

Can you name more? Or are you going to challenge him? I'm going to challenge Doogie Name that eight, kid Fuck I was full of shit I thought I could bluff Seth And he would I'll take a swing at it Okay I'm going to challenge Doogie. Name that eight, kid. I was full of shit. I thought I could bluff Seth and he would... I'll take a swing at it.

Okay, give it a go. We won't say if they're right or wrong until you've said eight names. Oh, I probably don't even know that many. Or until you give up. Al Pacino. James Caan. Robert De Niro. Abe Vigoda.

No, I can tell I already fucked up. People are laughing at me. Tom Hanks, Air Bud. No, I got that. That's really where you give up. You're doing so good. Deborah Kringer. So how many?

I was at? I was at? You were at like four or five. I was at four or five. Four. Four. Sticklers say four. You only need four more. Just start naming Italians.

I'm trying to think if I even got one more. Just for the fun of it, just add one more? I mean, Marlon Brando's got to... There's got to be some scenes with Marlon Brando. Maybe some flashbacks? Yeah, some flashbacks. Might be kind of pricey to show him again, though. Five.

He might just forget to show up. That lady. He was a forced ghost at the end. No, I think... All right. You're not going to do it. It was a valiant effort. But. No, I think... All right. You're not going to do it. It was a valiant effort. But you were right about Abe Vigoda

and all those others that you said. We're all correct. James Caan's barely made the cut because he's probably just a brief flashback or something. Danny Aiello, John Cazale, who was Cazale we were talking about earlier, Talia Shire, Lee Strasberg, G.D. Spradlin, Bruno Kirby, the great Bruno Kirby.

Who played his wife? Who played? Diane Keaton. Okay, that was the one. Yeah, yeah, Duval Pacino. Yeah, so there you go. Doogie, do you want to plug anything? My new book, some very interesting cats perhaps you weren't aware of that we've already mentioned twice.

Also, I have an album coming out February 5th called The Delicate Man. And you can follow me on Twitter at Doogie Horner. Thank you for having me on the show. Let's hear it for Doogie Horner. All right. What? Oh, yeah. You're supposed to take your pants off if you...

No, when I got it right, not he got it wrong. It's a different thing. I don't celebrate when people get it wrong. Now we got technicalities. When I get it right. More people want my pants off than I would have thought. And a lot of people are saying, no, no, ew, gross.

Relax. I'll do it when the time is right. Where did the bidding start in that last one? With Greg? Yes. Yeah, okay. So let's go the other way. We'll start with Ramon, and then we'll come at you, Seth.

So look out. Ramon gets to pick between these three categories. Patrick Hasty on Twitter suggested The Incredible Hulks, plural, which is the films of Eric Bana, Ed Norton, or Mark Ruffalo that got three stars or more from Leonard. The Incredible Hulks.

Or C. Rufflenatch suggested, or Ruffinatch suggested Tom Tanks. And that's Tom Hanks movies that Leonard gave two stars or less. Yeah. And B6

Dozer suggested Woodcock. And that's movies that feature a ventriloquist dummy. I'll do Tom Hanks. Ramon goes with the Tom Tanks. This is a movie that got two stars or less. It got two, in fact, from Leonard from 2011. He calls this movie Precocious. And he also says that it is adapted

from a novel. And he lists nine names. How many names do you think it will take for you to figure out this Tom Hanks tank? Eight names he says. Seth. Seth.

Six. Whoa. Interesting. I hope that you bid more, Jesse, because I want those pants to stay on. Three. Yes. When I said more, I meant less. Three names is all Jesse Pasternak needs

to name this movie with Tom Hanks from 2011. I don't think Robo Genius has the ability to bluff, so I will... Who told you? Who told you? Who told you? So I'll take two. Whoa. Call me in the morning.

Ramone. What are you going to do with that? He's taking two and calling me in the morning. I'm Dr. Doug. I'll take one. He says one name. Seth Herzog. You could go zero names.

You could go negative names. Negative names? Yeah. Negative one, you have to name the top-billed person. Negative two, you have to name the top-billed person. Negative two, you have to name the top-billed people. Oh, I see. Then you go the reverse. Yeah. Hmm. Hmm.

So if I say zero, what does that mean? That means that I won't give you any of the names. You just have to guess the name of the movie. Yeah, interesting. And you still got Jesse behind you. He could bid negative names. Yeah. Interesting. And you still got Jesse behind you. He could bid negative names. Yeah, I know. Jesse could name every single person

that wasn't in the film. Including everyone in the room. I'm going to guess the movie. Yeah. I'm going to make a guess on that film Zero names Seth Herzog If you fail

I'm out If I get it right pants are coming off But Jesse gets to decide If he's going to go negative names or not Oh that's right I can't guess yet I say zero and then he goes negative. Okay.

Yeah, yeah. I think you should have gone negative one, but that's just me. If you think you know the movie. But let's see what Jesse's going to do. I'm going to say name that movie. He's going to say name it. I think I know what's going on here I'm going to say The Da Vinci Code That's what's going on here

We all figured out you had no idea What is it? It's extremely loud and incredibly close Oh the 9-11 Yes Oh we don't get to see him With his pants off. What a shame.

What a damn shame. Uh-oh. They're coming off anyway. You're the only one we can blame. And what do you want to plug? Grab a mic and plug something. I do a big show every Tuesday downtown at the Slipper Room

called Sweet. Been doing it for years. Got a great show tomorrow night, every week. So everyone in New York, come on down, especially you beautiful people already here.

I don't know. I got some projects coming up. You'll hear about them later. Seth Herzog, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you. Thank you. Some people think they have to, like, filibuster. I'm not asking you to fill time.

Just plug your shit. This has gone on long enough. I'm excited, though. It's been a very good group as far as staying focused and being competitive. Yeah. We got a good three players left now. And you guys moving around in your seats confuse the hell out of me. We're in the same order.

I'm sure you are. Who challenged Seth on that? I did. You did. Okay, so we'll start with Ramon and head towards Jesse with, of course, Greg in the middle. Ramon gets to pick between. Oh, and when we're down to two,

it's Asparagus P, which is a movie I've chosen in advance. Just so you know. Ramon, Justin Tigner suggested Rage Against Matthew Modine. And that's films where Matthew Modine gets punched. And that's films where Matthew Modine gets punched. Westiola suggested Passenger 58. And that's movies where Wesley Snipes is second build.

Wesley Snipes is coming up a lot tonight. And, oh, that would be a good song. Wesley Snipes is coming up tonight. Movie Lodge suggested Slow Montania. And that's Joe Montania movies that are over two hours long. Which one of those do you like, Ramone? Let's go with the Wesley Snipes second billing. All right.

It's happened to the Snipes through a few times in his career. Would you like a movie where Wesley Snipes got second billing in 1992, 1993? That's enough. He did two in 93, so I can't say 93 again. Let's do 93. Okay. You want early 93 or late 93?

I don't know the difference, really. I'm just going to guess. Yeah, just pick one. I don't know. Okay, I'll pick one. Two and a half stars from Leonard for this movie where he says that Wesley Snipes plays an LA

cop and he says this movie is silly with credibility strained to the breaking point. Yeah, Leonard fucking snapped watching this goddamn movie. And he went out of control and listed

13 names. How many names did it take you to get it, Ramone? Eight. Eight's a pretty fancy bid, Greg. Yeah. Ugh. Eight. Eight's a pretty fancy bid, Greg. Jesse Chan, which last time, yeah. Kind of have an idea of what it is. Question is, do I go negative three? What the hell is happening?

He says negative three. No, no, no, no, no, no. I was thinking out loud about saying negative three. It's a big difference. Oh. But I'll go negative two. Oh. He says he could do negative two, Jesse.

I unfortunately have no idea what movie this is. I hate to see Jesse go out like this. Well, we'll have to go sometime, so I think I'll name that movie. Oh, such a young man saying we all have to go sometimes. That's like a cancer movie or something. That's what one of the kids says to Patch Adams.

And then he squeezes Patch's nose and Patch farts and everybody laughs and Philip Seymour Hoffman says you can't do that and they all wore clown noses he wasn't that, Philip Seymour Hoffman wasn't Patch Adams alright Greg says he's going to go negative two so he's going to name the title of the movie

and the top two billed people, starting with the top person, then the second billed person, which I believe is obvious at this point. And then I will declare if you're correct or not. Is it Rising Sun, Sean Connery, and Wesley Snipes? That is correct. Sean Connery and Wesley Snipes?

That is correct. Oh, Jesse. Jesse, what do you got coming up? You got like a test in Fellini class? I got to make a short film for that. I'm also writing a film and TV reviews for the Indiana Daily Student. And you can follow me on Twitter, at Jesse Pasternak. And you can follow my brother, at Sam Pasternak.

He's very funny. Oh, that's nice. How, uh... I wanted to ask him how long the Fellini course was because I'm hoping it's eight and a half weeks. I hope his mom knows to pick him up early. What's that? I hope his mom knows to come pick him up. I didn't say ladies and gentlemen.

Oh, I was about to. Then you'd do it again. I'm not going to fall for that. But seriously, let's hear it for Jesse Pasternak, everybody. I feel like I just kicked Rudy in the nuts. All right, so... So Jesse challenged you, right? Yes. You nailed it.

So I guess we'll start with Ramon and play a round of For the Win. This is Asparagus P. I've already selected the movie, Ramon. I'm going to tell you all about it right now. Oh, what happened to Jesse's name tag? He took it with him? Special keepsake? Put it under his pillow back in the dorm?

Okay. Three stars from Leonard for this movie from 1987. He says this film is about a young hotshot and he also says that it's completely absorbing

and that's enough. You're right. I got to read the whole review for asparagus pea. Did you say boring or absorbing? Huh? No, I'm going to read the whole thing. I forgot we were doing asparagus pea. All right.

So I'm going to read the whole thing, and then we start the bidding. So it's basically a negative names game. Okay. You guys get that, right? Yes. So I'm bidding how many people I know. Yeah, yeah. But in order.

Oh, shit. Old school Malton. Yeah. So it's tough. God damn. In order from the top. Young hotshot who's going nowhere in a New York brokerage firm manages to buttonhole the highest roller on Wall Street

and win his confidence, but he sells his soul, so to speak, in return for admittance to that high-powered world of wheeling and dealing. Modern-day morality tale. Co-writer, director, Stone,

is short on subtlety but completely absorbing especially in the wake of the real life insider trading scandal of 1986 and then he lists 18 names so we start with you, Ramon.

How many can you name from the top down? Damn. I can name four. Whoa. Stronger bid than I expected, Greg. Yeah, and the order is the tricky part, so I am going to put it in your hands, sir. You went hard.

You could go home a champion if you could figure out the order of this film, which I'm a little iffy on, so please name that movie. This is going to be interesting. I want to say Glen Gary Glen Ross. What's that?

Glen Gary Glen Ross or Wall Street. Because they're both... Well, it's... Gary Glenn Ross isn't about a stockbroker. They sell real estate. That's all white people's shit to me. Oh, yeah.

That's true. He's making a very hard argument. That's a solid point. No, yeah, the film is Wall Street. So you're... So that bit of four names, I'm really rooting for you now. That you're going to be able to pull this

off. From the top. Michael Douglas. Charlie Sheen. Shh. I shouldn't have been so strong. The stock market. Cocaine, probably.

Yeah, money never sleeps. Oh, man. I'm going to go ahead and guess Don Lemon or Jack Lemon. I'm real high, too. You still got Glenn Gary, Glenn Ross in the brain because that's what Jack Lemon was in. Oh, damn, yeah. You got the first two right. You would have had to go on Daryl Hannah and then Hal Holbrook, followed by Martin Sheen, who has the immortal line,

I don't judge a man by the size of his wallet! He screams that at his son. That means that Greg Wyshyski is our winner! And real quick. Thank you. Real quick. Let's get a plug from Ramon. Where can people find you?

What are you up to? My website's Blazer Ramon. That's also my handle on Instagram and Twitter is Blazer Ramon. And then if you go to Cleveland, go to accidentalcomedy.com or run a bunch of dope shows out there. And then if you want to smoke weed with me after the show, holla. Ramon Rivas II, everybody.

Thanks, dude. And now some plugs from our winner. Ramon's taking the rest of the cake. I want to congratulate Indy Adam Jones. What happened? I want to congratulate Indy Adam Jones for the victory. Yeah, so come on down and get your prize bag. And where are my hockey people?

Are you here? Yeah, where are they at? Brilliant. I write the Puck Daddy blog on Yahoo Sports. The book, again, is Take Your Eye Off the Puck. I have a podcast called Merrick vs. Wyszynski on the iTunes. And this is crazy, man. This is like life goal achievement.

Congratulations, man. Because you got life goal achievement. Congratulations, man. Because you got to come back and defend your title next year. I'm really good at it in the car. And so I feel confident now that anyone who can do it in the car can be up here too. One more time, everybody, for Don't Sound the Cannon, because he's our winner. Greg Wyshynski, everybody. Follow him on Twitter if you can spell that name. It's a tough one.

What a great guy. I had him picked from the start to win, because he's my favorite. And this is what Pete Davidson texted me during the show. I'm sorry, Doug. I'm stuck. I'll make it up to you. Love ya. So yeah. So I'm totally...

Pete Davidson's gonna blow me. I don't know how else he can make it up to me, you know. Just to do something pretty extreme. Thank you to everybody for being here and coming out and selling out this show so quickly. Ends up being a big event. Always a lot of fun.

The one out in Los Angeles is sold out as well and that's going to be a super fun one, too, coming up soon. And douglovesmovies.com for all my shit. And we've got a lot of shitheads to get through. So let's start with the big Tim Curry head. Team Iceland from the 1994 Junior Goodwill Games. Quack, quack. Fuck Gunner Stahl.

You have to take this back. You can't let us keep this one because this knitted alien head is too amazing. But thank you, Katie. Not being able to come up with a shithead is a shithead.

People at concerts who are constantly taking pictures or recording the show are a shithead. I'm going to get this one out of the way because I'm uncomfortable with it. Jesus Christ is a shithead.

People who don't know how to board planes are a shithead. People who aren't excited about the new Star Wars movie are a shithead. People who aren't excited about the new Star Wars movie are a shithead. People from New Jersey that tell people they're from New York are a shithead. The director of Mac and Me is a shithead Pennsylvania hot tub regulations are a shithead

laughter Oh no Finally Family members that are racist And make that fact known during the holidays And Donald Trump are shitheads Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes unfold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no

room in his heart for you cause Doug loves movies.