Doug Loves Movies - Tig Notaro, Sarah Silverman, Nikki Glaser, and Amy Schumer Guest

Episode Date: October 9, 2012

From the Gramercy Theatre in NYC, Doug welcomes comedians Tig Notaro, Sarah Silverman, Nikki Glaser, and Amy Schumer to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug makes candy wrappers, squeaky baby sticky seeds With 50 ads and 5 more kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies, coming to you from the Gramercy Theater in New York City.

Whoo! Doug Loves Movies coming to you from the Gramercy Theater in New York City. On Monday, October 8th, 2 Oceans 12. It's good to be back in the bapple. Yeah, that's short for Big Apple. I'm in a hurry. What's up, Bapple?

Since last, since last I spoke and you listened, I did a show with Rob Cantrell at the Arlington Drafthouse and Cinema in Arlington, Virginia. I screwed up and failed to tape the Leonard Malshin, Malshin? Malton game portion of the show. And so I just want to say really quickly that a girl from the roller derby in Northern Virginia, if you want to contact the roller derby in Northern Virginia, it's NovaRollerDerby on Twitter.

Her name, her roller derby name is Sheevildead, and she lost to Rob, and then Curious Dwayne, a dude with his name on a blown-up monkey, or a blow-up monkey. It wasn't an actual monkey who had been blown. They beat that person. The monkey didn't help at all. That person beat Rob and won the prize bag. I want to say to people listening in Arlington

that I will be back. I've got stand-up shows this month in Minneapolis on October 20th and Rosemont, Illinois on the 21st. For all of my October shows, I encourage everyone to wear a costume

slash name tag that pays tribute to your favorite movie characters. Does anybody do that here tonight? Because it's October. It's a little early in October, but I thought somebody might. Links for tics to all of my shows are at douglasmovies.com

Now it's time for tweet relief Tweets about movies Past and future guests Kumail Nanjiani At Kumailin His name is At Kumailin Was Kumail Nanjiani really taken? At Kumailin on Twitter

He tweeted You think they tossed a coin to see if Joseph Gordon-Levitt was going to do the Bruce Willis impression or vice versa? Hashtag looper. And my response to that is, yeah, I do, Kumail. And the coin landed on bald. This has been

Tweet Relief Tweets About Movies. Let's look in the prize bag. Let's look in it. I try to do a good prize bag for you guys because I know that shows in New York City come with fees and

in my opinion, you all paid too much to be here tonight. So thank you for that and at least one of you is going to pay off and it's going to work out that you spent $8.50 or whatever it is in Ticketmaster

bullshit someone is going to get an Aria Sonic skin cleansing machine robot from the future I'd call it the Sarah Connor Even though she's from now We have a t-shirt here that says the New Yorker Festival 2012. That's a nice item. No reason to applaud for it, but...

Doug digs it. I threw in a copy of the great, great movie Dazed and Confused. From backstage is an amazing array of snacks. Most of which me and my guests will not get to, so I'm contributing a can of Pringles cheddar cheese. This is amazing. I can't believe that this is being given up tonight. A Mad Men calendar, 2012 edition,

so there's a good there's a good two months and twenty some days I can't figure I can't do the math quickly enough and Doug Loves Movies t-shirt

and some sort of headphones that scrunch up into a small thing and a copy of my CD smug life and oh this is the coolest you guys I got to show you this thing really Oh my god, I gotta tear into the packaging. I gotta make this happen. Ugh! Alright, check this out. I gotta do it someplace that's dark. Um...

I say that about most of my post show activities. Oh my god, let's say you're about to be attacked and you have this in your hand. Oh, bat signal! Let's get that bat signal out there. It's the latest in rape

whistle technology. Apologize for going there. A little quick edit on that and we'll be fine. So that's in the bag. And the bag is falling apart because it's too heavy. Also, given to me by my friend and frequent guest who is not here tonight, but is in spirit because we all love him so much,

the latest Leonard Walden movie guide. 2013. This has got reviews of movies that are coming out in the next few months. Plus lots of other ones. That's a big, heavy book. So that's the prize bag, you guys.

Not too shabs. And let's bring them out here. My guess, last time I was here in New York, it was the total sausage fest on stage. And so I went the other way tonight. Whatever disgusting phrase he used to describe that.

Please welcome Nikki Glaser, Tig Notaro, Amy Schumer, and Sarah Silverman. Thank you. That's all for me. Amy thinks that's all for her. You guys are the best. Amy Schumer, everybody. It means the world.

Amy's here. Hi, Amy. Hey. Straight from therapy. Thank you. You're welcome. For ditching out of therapy early. You're welcome. She threw me out. I wanted to

stay longer. She said, get the fuck out of here. Really? Yeah. Because you told her you were running late for a show? Or just because she didn't want to hear any more of your shit? No, she was like, I've had it. Go do your show. I've had it. I was like, alright. Great to talk to you. When do you see her again? Well, we had an appointment on Wednesday,

but she canceled. Wow. It sounds like she wants you to think about what you've done. Things are great. Things are great. So whatever. The job is supposed to be like being supportive, right? Sounds like she's letting you down. She's letting me down.

She's letting me down. Sorry, this isn't your problem, you guys. You probably had tough days of your own. But yeah, yeah. Yeah, this isn't your problem, you guys. You probably had tough days of your own. But yeah. Yeah. Mondays, right? Mondays. Who can do it? Who can handle it? Nikki Glaser's here, everybody. Yay!

And Nikki, we probably talked about this the last time I was here, but I'm still excited about it. You have a show on MTV starting in January. Yes, January 24th. The Nikki and Sarah show. Am I in it? No, that's not you, Sarah.

Sorry to break it to you. They went another way with the Sarah character in this instance. But that's great on MTV. It's like a weekly pop culture news. It's like daily show, but with pop culture. Yep. I've been telling people,

I've been telling people it's like Chelsea, Chelsea lately, Chelsea Handler meets Conan. Like we're going to introduce them to each other on the show. That's week one. Yeah. I know people use those expressions. It's like this meets that. It's that. Like we're really going to just have them meet each other. Your show is like they actually one? Yeah. I know people use those expressions like this meets that.

We're really going to just have them meet each other. Your show is like they actually meet. Yeah, that's the whole show. Is what your show is like. Over and over every week. It's weird. Did you get it? We just got it.

Sorry, that was my bad. I'm still in the dark. Can you run me through it? I'm sorry. I actually don't get it. That's Tig Notaro, everybody. That is...

No. Remember that movie, They Live? Of course you don't. You're not in the movie. Sarah likes it. But it's a great movie. Rowdy Roddy Piper? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Keith David or David Keith. I can't

get them mixed up. The white one or the black one? The black one. Oh, Keith David. Yeah. There you go. And the only reason I brought that up is because TIG's it's not an album. It's more like a recorded set. It's an album.

40 minutes. How long is it? It's actually 31 minutes or so. Okay. Her new 31-minute album is called Live. Yes. And it is available as we speak? Exclusively at Louis C.K.'s website.

Louis C.K. not, Louis C.K. dot website. Louis CK dot... Louis CK dot net. Louis CK dot net. Yeah. Oh, so it's L-O... It's hard to find it, so we want to make sure you get the right... Does he have both L-O-U-I-S and L-O-U-I-E?

What? There's two ways to spell Louis. Louis. Louis. No, Louis. Okay, Louis. No, Louis. Okay, LouisCK.com and part of the proceeds go to charity? That's correct. What? How much? Yeah, how much

are you fucking wasting, giving away? I'm not. I'm just saying that. Oh. Beautiful. Love it. And Sarah Silverman is also here, everybody. Thank you so much. So happy to be here.

I try to give everybody a separate round of applause once they're out here. And what brings you to New York City? Why are we so lucky that you and I are on the same coast at the same time? You know, I've just been really wanting to get back to my roots of New York.

Pass by people on the street and connect and there there What? What did you do tonight when there was, and can I tell the story of what you did tonight?

What did I do? Before here. Oh, yeah. You went to buy a coat, and there was a long line, so what did you do? Okay, well, first, I was really cold. I didn't pack.

I was just here two weeks ago for a month, and it was 100 degrees, so I didn't pack well. This is going to be a great story, by the way. Because you thought, this is the year they're going to have it's going to be summer for a year um

I uh so I saw a coat store across the street went found the perfect coat looked at the price $3,600 hopped in a cab went to Burlington Coat Factory got the coat of my dreams for $70.

Hello. But then it's like... 17? 70. So you ruined it. Which is also your bra size. $70? 70.

Oh. Still doesn't make sense. That would make my... What's your waist but up here called? I don't know bra sizes. Chest, seven inches. But Doug loves boobies. Is that why I'm on the show?

Tick, tick, tick. Titty Committee Chairman has spoken. Yeah, so you got... You asked somebody in the front of the line. Oh, there was a line that was a city block long. That's the caveat of the fact that Burlington Coat Factory is incredible. They're more than coats. It's more than coats.

More than great coats. And so I just... I cut the line and paid a lady in cash to also purchase my things. Was that the great story you wanted me to tell? It's pretty good. What did you say to her? You went to the front and you said,

She was next in line and I was like, If you pay... My baby's in the car. I'll give you cash, and you can keep whatever is left. You're like, I'll give you $2,930. I don't get it. I was making the joke that you ended up paying the same. I still got it.

No, I just didn't get it because not one number was the same as the actual number I said. I know, but still. The audience got it. So, egg on my... I'm sure the first person in line was a big Doug Loves Movies fan when you explained that you were running late for the podcast that greased the wheels.

Yeah, I'm still talking to you. Oh, what'd you say? I'm sorry, doll. What'd you say? It's all good. So are you promoting Wreck-It Ralph? Is that what you're doing back in the city? No, I'm coming back at the end of the month to do that.

Oh, shit. Really? Back and forth. I did the New Yorker Festival, which was very fun and very hoity-toity. And I got a gift bag that a lot of the prizes I gave comes from it. Actual bag, almost. But not all of the prizes. Actual bag was almost going to be part of the prize.

But this little lady. I took a liking to it. Took a liking to it. Yeah, I let the, it's like Secret Santa. When my guests are backstage, all the prizes they want to contribute, someone else can grab them. And the ones that nobody wants, that's what I put in the bag. You think this is the beginning of the show, but you're getting sloppy seconds, basically. Yeah, it's still pretty good.

It's a good bag. Some people love sloppy seconds. I think we put together a nice bag, ladies. Nice. Word play. I think we put together a nice bag, ladies. Nice. Word play. Amy, laugh into the microphone if you're going to laugh at something I say. Thank you very much.

Sorry, sorry. Let's start with Amy. Have you been to the cinema lately? No. Nikki? Yeah. Wait, but somebody told me to go see Looper. Oh, okay.

That's a reasonable thing for somebody to tell you. I wanted to go see Looper yesterday, but I couldn't find anybody to go with me. I asked Tig, but she said no. So you never go to the movies alone? I do, but I didn't want to go yesterday because of what's going on with my therapist. I feel vulnerable.

All right. So Amy says, everybody, I've heard loopers, all right. When I re-watched Hunger Games on a flight to Vegas. Would you learn re-watching it? Like what did you glean differently than the first time? I honestly only watch what's the girl's name? Jennifer?

Lawrence. I just look at her porcelain skin and it just gets more gorgeous each scene. I don't even follow the movie story but I stare at her. In Silver Linings Playbook she and Bradley Cooper play crazy people who are also beautiful. So I can't wait for that.

I've heard great things about it. It's you know David O. Russell who are also beautiful. So I can't wait for that. I've heard great things about it. It's David O. Russell who's a genius. Oh wait, the house at the end of the street? That's a different movie. Oh, I heard that one's not good. That's like a scary movie that I think was made ten years ago and then

taking advantage of her newfound fame. Is there someone that's more worthless on this podcast than me? Honestly. Tig's got her hand up. She goes to less movies than you and that's probably because you ask each other to go to the movies and one of you is always busy

or not interested. She wasn't busy. She was just like no. What have you seen, Nikki? I saw The Master last week. Nice. Did you see it? I mean, I didn't want it. Let's have a debate right now. I really hated it.

It's so boring. It is so boring. I tweeted after, life is short until you see The Master. I felt raped of my life. I felt, I was so angry afterwards. The whole time, I was just

it was, yeah, it made me furious. Like I was pissed. But at the same time, those actors are really good. They were all amazing. It's like, it's the weirdest thing to be like completely admiring a performance while bored to shit by the movie.

Is that the Scientology one? Yeah. It's called The Cause. I think. It's not Scientology. Did anyone like it? People liked it, I thought. It's Scientology that didn't take off. It's even worse than Scientology.

It's Scientology that nobody cared. Him walking back and forth across that room, I just couldn't do it. That sounds awesome. I like that test that he took, though. It reminded me of the Voight-Kampff from Blade Runner. One guy in the back laughing at that. One guy lost his mind, the rest of the audience.

We have not seen the master and Blade Runner within a two-day period. When he can't blink, that test you mean? I don't know why I made you guys all robot-voiced. Oh, wait, wait, okay. Yeah, yeah, where he keeps telling them don't blink and answer these questions. And then it's all downhill from there. It's so excruciating. It was like a lie detector test before electricity.

But they had electricity in the movie, though, I think. They did. My eyes started hurting, though, because he can't blink. And then you just become obsessed. You're like, oh, my God, he hasn't blinked. And then you're trying to do it. And then it just becomes so painful. I couldn't enjoy that scene even, and it's the best scene in the movie.

Joaquin Phoenix just got cast because his resume under special skills says doesn't need to blink His mouth is so twisted his mouth Smile train didn't exist when he was born no reason no reason you mean operation smile Huh? He has like a kid with messed up lips Smile trains this awesome I think he had a Cleft palate I think I I love a disability on a guy

Yeah me too God I do too A baby arm Yes Right Give me an eye patch Fuck it

Forget about it I was watching Walk the line Thinking this is exactly What Johnny Cash Would have been like If he had a hair lip This is

He is nailing Johnny Cash with a hair lip right now. He is perfecting it. We're going to reimagine Johnny Cash. Somebody should go back and change all his old photos. Yes, Amy? Okay, I remembered I saw a movie. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I saw the Katy Perry movie.

Yes! Hear me out, okay? I just got a 3D TV at home which is useless unless you want to watch the katie perry movie and some like sports that i don't care about which it was fun it was only fun to watch that movie because she got her divorce during it but then i'm watching her get a divorce in 3D. It was like her tears were going to hit my face. That's how intimate it was. Did you guys see that movie?

I saw it on opening day. I loved it. I saw it. You saw it on opening day? Listen to this. Come on. I sure did. I saw it two weeks to the day at the Aurora Theater where that shooting happened.

Oh, wait a second. What a crowd pleaser, Nick. I'm sorry, but... My dad has MS. Do you want to get into that? Tig, is there anything you want to... Nothing going on with me. Welcome to another episode of Maybe Tig Will Say Something. Let's see what happens this week. I'm sorry about your father, Amy.

Thank you. Thank you so much. I'm going to come back to you, Sarah, because I'm dying to bring Tig into this, because I can't wait to hear her answer. Have you been to this? I know you've got other things going on, but have you been? Not a thing. Have you seen a movie lately?

Are you talking, is that Chelsea's new show? Yes. That's her movie podcast. Have you seen a movie lately? Were you asking me? Yes, please. I saw, I

don't ever remember the name of that movie that I saw, but it's But yes, I did see one. Yes, I did. Do you recommend it? I do quite much so all right everybody go see that you should check it out make sure you see it it the movie don't take don't go i was gonna go see a movie oh i'm glad we inspired you to see a movie, but there's more of this.

It was the movie, I guess it was at Sundance or South by Southwest or something. Oh, that one. It was about the swamps of Louisiana. It was the... Beast of Southern Wild. Yeah, Beast of Southern Wild.

That was amazing. Can we do a new feature on my show where you come out and try to describe a movie you've seen and the first person who can guess it will be the winner? Well, you want to go back and try it? Well, if you have another movie, we already know the answer to that one.

I still think it'd be fun if we just went back. Did you like that movie? The Beast of the Southern Wilds? Yes. I loved it, Doug. Really? That little girl is good. Hush puppy.

She's good. Oh yeah, I forgot her name, but I did enjoy her. I honestly haven't even thought about her since I saw the movie. It's a weird ass movie. You didn't love it? I liked it. I thought it was interesting. But it's 90 minutes of a little girl with no parents running around in a junkyard.

Ooh. I guess I relate to that. I'm like very, you know, through the whole movie, where are her parents? But I mean, it was, I didn't know, were those actors? I didn't even know what was going on. I didn't know if those were? I didn't even know what was going on It was a documentary I mean, honestly They seemed like

I heard they're not actors, honestly Please don't point in my face You know what, I actually heard that too Yeah, they just seemed like really normal people That lived in swamps. Who are you waving at, Amy? Oh, I just realized I know the bartender. Oh, I just realized I wanted to get to know the bartender.

If anybody wants something to drink here at the Gramercy, if you say it into a microphone, they'll bring it to you. Red wine. Pulled and moved, and I know that guy. I meant here at the Gramercy, someone from the audience will buy you that drink. Still no movement. That's what's happened.

Still no movement. I barely stopped speaking. Do you have eggnog? Let's start no movement. I barely stopped speaking. Do you have eggnog? Let's start the holidays. I have a hankering for eggnog. Let's fucking nog it up, everybody. Sarah. Sarah.

Me or Nikki's partner from her show. What have you seen lately? That's Chelsea from her show. What have you seen lately? That's Chelsea's other show. The other night I saw, this isn't in the theaters, but I have never seen it before. I saw Six Degrees of Separation. It was on TV. And it was interesting.

Will Smith is so gay in that. Hey, hey, hey, hey I know you love Will Smith, Tig He was the missing father In Beast of the Southern Wild Although actually the father is there Through the whole movie No, I know, I saw it He yells at her a lot

Don't give it away. He gives her a hard time, that hush puppy. First he gives her that shit name, and then he yells at her about make sure you clean up the bathtub. I forget what he said to her. I don't know. I don't know.

Back to Sarah. Fun fact about Six Degrees of Separation that I realized while watching it. I'm like, who is that angry teenager? Do you know who it was? Angry teenager? Kevin Bacon. No.

In Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon? Who the fuck is this angry teenager? He's so angry. And I look. It is. And I didn't even know he ever acted. J.J. Abrams. Boom. The audience

loved it. Blew their minds. And by the way, I don't want to sound show business-y because I never... Every once in a while, my agents will send me movie scripts as if I could ever even be seen for them or have a chance to be in them.

And I got that script, the silver lining handbook. Silver lining playbook. Amy got her wine. Amy got her wine. She is loved, officially. Tig didn't get her eggnog. That would have been a great name for your CD if things didn't

go well. I don't know if you heard the CD, but things didn't go well. Actually, you don't even have to listen to the CD. You can just talk to a friend of ours. Any friend, really. Word got out. I totally forgot what we were talking about.

Kevin Bacon. Oh, it was J.J. Abrams. So you get these scripts. Oh, yeah, that's it. Ooh, Nikki Glaser. Wow, Nikki, you should host a show on MTV about pop culture. We all fell asleep for a second. Nikki kept it on track.

I don't know if it's a good story, but I read that movie because I was like, ooh, David O. Russell. But I never want to read the scripts because I know that I can't get seen for them and it just hurts too much. But I read it and the part of the girl is incredible

and I was like, this is me. I've never wanted to fight for something more. And it's opposite a character who's the same age as me. I'm right for this. They didn't want me to audition or anything, but my agent's like, if you want it so much, put yourself on tape.

And I was like, I will! And I worked really hard and I put myself on tape. And then that is what my agent called me. And I was forced to then request of him that when he calls me, could he tell me I lost the part to a 22-year-old and then loudly eat almonds? Would that be possible at all? Because it's not like I lost the part to her. I don't think I ever had a chance, and probably the video is never seen, but...

Did they sound like almonds, or did... It was like... Oh, yeah, she's wonderful. So I went a different way. They went, yeah, they went a different way with it. Where the guy pushing 40 went to school with a 22-year-old somehow, I guess. Well, they're both crazy in the movie,

so that explains it. Yeah, I'm sure it's awesome. Robert. I went a different way with my wife Hey, I'm still doing great I'm still vital People like me, I can do this stuff Sarah, I thought When I saw that trailer, I thought that movie looked terrible. Terrible trailer,

terrible title. Really? You promise? A total piece of shit. But then it played at the Toronto Film Festival and everyone's talking about it's the greatest movie ever made. Doug, that actress got AIDS. Amy, you promise? Lesions on her face, AIDS.

You just said how great her skin was. Shut up, Nikki. You're not totally full of yourself. I'm canceling your show. You're thinking about Silver Linings Gay Book. Oh, right, Silver Linings Gay Book. Okay, so this is the time of the show where I have to ask, does anyone hunger for games?

And the answer is no one on stages Let's do it, let's rock it Yeah Let's start with Build-A-Title Yeah, let's do it What are we going to do when it gets to Tig? I know I'm in a panic You know she's been on the show a few times before And it's gone horribly

I think you won once Because you gave me all the answers Well didn't you get the Cheat sheet for tonight? There's no such thing. The audience was like, are you kidding me? Wow, that got weird. We got enough conspiracies outside of this theater.

We don't need any here. Save the cheating for Paul. Yeah, no, Tig has no idea what's about to happen. And I can say that confidently. Because if has no idea what's about to happen and I can say that confidently because if I told her what was about to happen she probably still

would have no idea. I'm not good with patterns. I never catch on to anything. You're not a movie buff. I don't know.

Or even a movie person. Once in a while. Person. But I still love having you on the show, don't get me wrong. Person. But these other three ladies,

they're going to mix it up so hard that Tig could walk away with this thing. Yeah, it's as much about strategy as it is about luck. We all just stare off and we're all just going, I know.

All thinking about our own shit right now. Just, oh no. I wonder what Amy was in therapy about. Boundaries. I don't have any and we live together. I know. Do you know that we live together. I know. Do you know that we live together?

I know that... Do you or do you not know that we live together? Answer the question, Doug. Answer the question. I know that you... Jamie, you were very generous in offering to... Do you or do you not know that we live together? Yeah, but now Tick's fine. Tick's doing great, so now know that we live together? Yeah, but now

I assume that you did. Now Tick's fine. Tick's doing great, so now we just weirdly live together. Now you're weird roommates. Like, wow, you're both so successful and you each have a roommate. We drink champagne all day, but we're like, why are we living together? Three roommates. Three roommates. We got Kyle Dunnigan.

Who else is in there? Kyle Dunnigan, my sweetie. They just got bunk beds. Our sweetie. Not kidding. Guess who's getting their old They just got bunk beds. Our sweetie. Not kidding. Guess who's getting their old bed? Nikki Glaser. This one. I'm dating a man who sleeps in a bunk bed with Tig.

It's perfect. When we were looking into bunk beds, Kyle was on the phone saying, yeah, hi. I'm a full-grown 41-year-old man. And I was wondering if this would hold me up. I'll be sharing it with somebody. We have a combined age of 83. Are we going gonna be okay? See, that's why I like having Tig on

my movie podcast. Well, I was on the phone with my mother last night and... I wasn't. Oh, God. And I said, well, Kyle wants to be on the bottom because he's afraid that if it breaks he would crush her if he was on the top. And my mother was like, well, Kyle wants to be on the bottom because he's afraid that if it breaks, he would crash her if he was on the top.

And my mother was like, you tell Kyle Tig is not to be on the top bunk. She can't be walking up and down a ladder in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I know, I'm in really bad shape right now. Let yourself go. That's what Amy and I, Amy, Kyle, and I have been laughing about.

The scenario they thought would be going Amy and I, Amy, Kyle, and I have been laughing about. The scenario they thought would be going on when I moved to New York. Kyle was like, I thought my life was going to be me tilting your straw perfectly to the angle

where you'd be able to sip your juice. And I thought, I was like, I'm going to decorate her headscarves. She's fine. But I showed up cancer free and we're just hanging out.

Just hanging out. Tig, always fishing for an applause break. Another thing. Now that I have your attention. I hope somebody's recording this. This is her next album. Yeah, you can get this episode of Doug Lowe's Movies at Louis CK... Louis CK dot something. This one episode.

Only this one. Let's start with... Just TIG's mic line. Just her... I don't know the jargon. I think it's with only TIG's mic line. I think you nailed it.

Really? Yeah. Track. you nailed it. Really? Yeah. Track. Line. Mic. Pose. We'll start with Amy. Start with Amy.

I'm on the road a lot. Can everybody come to my show? All right, sorry, go ahead. I have a book coming out. Ninja Tech. I don't know how to play this game. We'll start with Nikki and then we'll go to Sarah. I was just trying to keep it

as far away from TIG as possible. But it's going to work out just fine. We'll start with Nikki. The opening title, and build a title, is Princess Bride. So you need a movie that ends in princess or begins with bride or part of one of those words. Someone just cracked open a cold one. Okay, I'll go.

I got princess bride bridesmaids. You know it's quiet at a show when you can hear a beer being opened. Princess bridesmaids. Yeah. Bridesmaids? Bridesmaids, yeah. That sounds good to me.

Now we go to Sarah. So you need something that begins with maids or ends with princess or part of princess. I don't have any ideas. She taps my shoulders like she's going to whisper something and then she just has a weird smile. I thought you have any ideas. She taps my shoulders like she's going to whisper something and then she just has a weird smile. I thought you were zoning out.

No, I'm not sure if they... I'm assuming a movie must have been made of The Little Princess Bridesmaids. Little Prince, yes. Yeah, Gene Wilder was in there. This guy's saying no. Oh, no? Little Prince. No, you. It's called The Little Prince. Oh, it, Gene Wilder was in there. This guy's saying no. Oh, no? Little Prince.

No, you. It's called The Little Prince. Oh, it looks like you're like this, but you're just like, you're a human bobblehead. The Little Princess. That's a movie. The Little Princess?

Yeah, that's a movie. Okay. Okay, even better. It works. It totally works. Whoa, you're a great boyfriend. He's like, she has it on DVD. Little princess bridesmaids.

You could do anything that starts with AIDS or ends with the. What ends with the? You don't worry about the the. What about the band the the?

It ends in little. The little bridesmaids? Okay, Tiggs out. Amy, you get it now, right? It's the little princess bridesmaids? Yeah. That's where we are right now yeah okay

I feel like I saw this one movie on a plane okay if I say it wrong am I out I thought you were already out so If I say it wrong, am I out? I thought you were already out, so... So anything you do right now is potential victory. Turn around and bite me. Yeah, ask Sarah.

Nikki and Amy are conferring. Nikki and Amy are conferring. This happened in the last all-girls show I did with Garfunkel and Oates and Anna Kendrick and Nick Kroll. What? What happened? He was saying Nick Kroll was a girl. Huh? It killed. Don't worry about it. I was just having fun.

What do you got? Um. Oh yeah. Um. The. Yeah. It has to be with an S. You guys help each other through the tough times and the good times.

And this time. It's neither? It has to be maids, right? With an S. Yeah this time. It has to be maids, right? With an S? Yeah, it has to be with an S. Can't be made to order. Or it has to end with a little. It can't even be made in Manhattan. That's what I was thinking too. But that is so, I want a round

of applause. Yeah, that was pretty good. I saw that on a plane. Even though you're out, that was great. I saw it with no headphones. That was a good. I saw that on a plane. Even though you're out, that was great. I saw it with no headphones. That was a great effort. This is a tough one.

That was a great, great effort. That's how it works. Then we move on to the next one. We don't have to sweat it so much. Can't we just move on to the next game and know the take loss? You don't have to do the the in little. Yeah, we always drop it.

The Little Princess Bridesmaids. Just Little Princess Bridesmaids. Little Princess. But it's on Amy. Little. So something that ends in little. Princess Bridesmaids.

There will be no sliding today. I love how Amy plays these games because she surprises herself when she knows anything. I'm firing my therapist. You guys get me. Okay, so Stuart Little Princess Bridesmaids. Nikki. Stuart. Yeah.

Hollywood story. Stuart. Yeah. Stuart. The true Hollywood story of our Stuart. Stuart. Stuart. Stew. Something stew. There's nothing stew, Nikki,

and you know it. I think there is. I think there's something stew. Oh. Oh, you got it? Oh, no. Yeah, strange brew doesn't work AIDS

I don't know what you were thinking Do you need me to help you? I was thinking rat tattooing No way do you have an idea? Really? I mean the unofficial title was AIDS Philadelphia But then they shortened it to just Philadelphia AIDS in Manhattan

Wisely Maids with AIDS in Manhattan. Wisely. Maids with AIDS in Manhattan. Little maids with AIDS in Manhattan. Oh my god, I'm on a roll. Can I get back in the game? I think I'm already back in. No, you'll be back in soon enough But not for that

I know there's nothing Nikki gives up Does Sarah have anything I think I'm on to something Hold on Stuart Little Stuart Little Princess

Bridesmaids Maids Maids Stuart Little. Okay, wait, wait, wait. Princess. Bridesmaids. Aids. Maids. With AIDS. There's a movie called Cursed, right? Probably. Yeah. Cursed? Where's that gonna go? Cursed Stuart Little.

Does it have to be That's taking real liberty, Sarah. This is not Burlington Coat Factory You can't just do whatever you want That store has everything Wait a minute Wait a minute The only thing you can use from stew Is stew

You can't just use stew Why not first First Stewart little If it's like something first. That was Tick that made that noise. No, I just realized. You fell for that?

No, you thought Doug traveled the country with somebody that goes... I got a buzzer guy working in the back. He travels around with me. Alright, so Amy wins that round.

Oh my god! I needed it. Doug, do you have anything for that? I can't think of any way to add on. What about the audience? Any stew? Oh, cool. The classic Marx Brothers.

Oh, yeah, duck stew. Oh, sh... Duck goulash. Duck stew. All right, let's see how we're doing on time, you guys. Oh, we're doing great on time. That's always a good sign. Yeah, if being late is what you're looking for,

we're on the money. Oh, what was your prize that you brought, Amy? You brought something out at the last second. Oh, actually, Nikki hooked me up with it, but it's a postcard of Britney Spears when she still had it. Okay. She hadn't done it

again. Like, she hadn't even done it at all. So that's in the prize bag, too. She's just about to do it. She's on the cusp of doing it So Amy gets to go first in this next game And she'll be followed by Tig So get ready Tig

And this game is called How much did this shit make Oh god I suck at this so hard I'm good at this This is the one thing I'm really good at I know numbers. Alright, well, here's

what happens. I name a movie, and then you all bid on how much you think it made at the domestic box office, according to boxofficemojo.com. Sure. And closest without going over, Price is Right style, wins.

Alright, here we go. I think we can all agree that the film version of Rent was a misfire. Sarah. That was a very knowing laugh from the audience. Sarah has a weird just written in part in that movie that wasn't

in the play. You weren't in the play. In the play it was, well first of all I sang two songs to audition for that movie, and I got the only non-singing role. And it is in the play in the form of, like, voicemails. Did Dave Foley sing in that movie? He's in that? Isn't he? No.

Well, I will tell you that I had never seen the play, and I was at the gym, and the movie hadn't come out yet, and I'm literally just in it for a second, and somebody said, I got, I saw, he was some sort of mucky muck that got to see an early screening of it, he said, you are the funniest thing in the movie. I was so excited, and then I went to the the premiere and I found out it's an AIDS drama. You are the funniest thing in an AIDS drama.

That's amazing. And I had a huge zit and the makeup artist yelled at me for my zit and was like, there's no way around this. I have to make it into a mole. So I have like a brown colored set.

Where was it? Are you like, how would you have treated me if I showed up with AIDS? I'm going to have to make these into birthmarks. So exhausting. So anyway, I knew it wouldn't be a sore subject for me to make this the subject of how much did this shit make. Because you are barely in it. Opening weekend? And also I knew you wouldn't have much of an advantage because I'm sure you didn't keep track of how much money it made.

So not opening weekend. I couldn't even tell you when it came out or even if it was the 90s or the 2000s. It was the 2000s. I could count on you for that. So yeah, it's... We were friends. Amy, we just need to know how many in millions you think it made during its run at the North American box office.

30. Domestic. Domestic, we call it. $30 million. Why? Is a guy in the audience questioning it and I don't approve of that kind of behavior? 18.9. We go to Tig next.

Oh, shit. Sorry. What was the question? How much would... No, the question is, how much did rent make at the box office? 13 million. Go ahead.

Google it. Check it. Sarah. Is this up till now? Yeah. Oh. Sarah. Is this up till now? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Is this up to me? It's up until when Tig spoke.

How much did Rent make? Did I get it right? We're going to get all the bids. All right. Can you please go on Price is Right? That would be the best thing. Oh, my God? That would be the best thing. That would be the best dig that ever happened. 26 million.

Boom. I won. What do I win? What did I say? You don't have to stick to what you said before. I'm going to stick to it. 19. The answer is 13, by the way. You said 30. I said 30. I said 30.

$1. Is of course the way to go on Price is Right. Or 1 million, I guess. The actual amount, according to Box Office Mojo, and the closest person without going over is Sarah Silverman at 26.

Oh, really? Because the answer is $29 million. Wow. 29. She gets me again. Amy was closer, but I'll take it. Okay, I guess $13 million was like domestically. That's what I...

This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me. Amy, let's go home. Let's get out of here. I wish the prize for winning that was a Frozen Charleston 2. Miniature. Does they have that? Anyone? Does anyone have a fun-sized frozen...

Eggnog. Sea to the sea or an eggnog? Are you guys trying to make an eggnog or are you just... Or are you just flat out ignoring me? I don't even need it to be frozen. She meant to make a wish a while back and now she's going to go ahead and make it now. If you guys could make her an eggnog. I think they're trying.

It looks like they're trying. No, it doesn't. I see eggs and nog. They're making eggnog movements. If they came up with anything remotely close to an eggnog, I would be so happy. Eggnog movements.

Another good album title. It's more of a Tonberry album title. Eggnog Movements. Another good album title. It's more of a Tom Berry album title. Eggnog Movements? Yeah. Well, he has an eggnog joke that's hilarious. Oh, tell us now. Please, yes. Let's hear it.

Well, I actually don't remember how it goes. I'll give you a hint. But... Good night, sweetheart. Well, it's time to go. I'll give you a hint. Good night, sweetheart. Well, it's time to go. Good night, sweetheart. Well, it's time to go. Can I get another one?

How did that happen? How did that just happen? I don't know. Why did it stop? Vodka soda with a little eggnog chaser. Sarah, I was hoping you'd do your great joke of, oh my God, I didn't know you couldn't know. Why did it stop? Vodka soda with a little eggnog chaser. Sarah, I was hoping you'd do your great joke of, oh my God, I didn't know you couldn't sing. Wait, first of all, I thought that was your joke.

It is. Is it? You know, I think it's Harris Whittle's joke. I always attribute it to you. But when people sing or dance or anything, you go, oh my God, I didn't know you couldn't sing Todd Barry's joke from what I can remember is that he hey everybody is that my egg not you can you can give it directly to me.

I think Todd Berry's joke is that he's sitting next to... It's so funny. I was sitting... He's sitting next to... I was sitting next to... Are there deaf people here? Are you doing the interpretation

I'm being translated that's for the deaf folks so Todd's sitting next to this this woman that's trying to teach I think I guess some Asian person how to say words in English

and Todd all he hears is this one this is right next to his tail it's my favorite thing in the world this womannog. And then she goes, egg-nog. And he goes, egg-a-nog. And that went on. Why isn't it egg-a-nog-a? Why does he stop at the last one? The double G indicates that you have to go up.

Oh my God, Asian people are so stupid, right? I guess that's what my point was. No, but how does it end? I don't know. I said I don't remember how it goes. But I just would have, I guess I just... So when you were interrupting yourself with laughter,

it was at the setup. Okay. I am... I wish so desperately I had overheard that going on forever. Can we call Todd and have him say it into the mic?

Oh, shit. Let's do it. Okay. You can call... Let's all call him at one time. I don't have my phone. Oh, my God, you guys. It's 9-11.

Who can get him on the phone fastest? Go. My phone is not... Tig, you're just looking at pictures of yourself. I look good. Look at that one. Tig's room at that one. Oops. Tig's room at Cedars Hospital.

Everything's fine now. Are you guys getting through? Do you guys want to move? It's ringing. Mine's ringing. Todd? Oh, I got his voicemail. But he didn't even pick up.

Let me try this again. Try my room at Cedars. He's got a's a message. But he didn't even pick up. Let me try this again. Try my room at Cedars. He's got a great outgoing message. Hi, it's Todd. Leave me a message. I put too much energy into it. All right, let's... Todd? Oh, it's just an outgoing message.

He's doing it set somewhere. Oh, yeah, so is mine. Well, it's just going to go to voicemail again. Doug, don't ruin it. Hello. Leave me a message. Thank you. I'm at the tone.

Please record your message. You have finished recording. You may hang up or press one for more options. Hey, Todd, it's Tig. What is that? How does that joke go? How does that? Could you all hold on one second?

How does that one joke go where, um, hang on. Hey Todd, it's Tig. Uh, how does that one joke go where, seriously, could y'all just be quiet for a second? Uh, hey Todd, how does that one todd did you answer the phone todd no hey todd it's tig hey um how does that one joke go? Where you're sitting next to an Asian person? I hope he calls us back.

It's like the one night where Todd Berry's hard to get on the phone He's got a real Something big going on tonight All of his friends are calling him He's gonna get those messages All five of us One from

On my phone One from Sarah's And one from yours That's gonna to be good. He'll call us back immediately. He's got nothing. I'll keep an eye out for that. Since Amy won the last game, she gets to go first

in the Leonard Maltin game. Oh, shit. Oh, wait. Sarah won the last game. Sorry, Amy. Really? Oh, I did, right. Yeah, Sarah won the last game. Here come the name tags, everybody, I did, right. Yeah, Sarah won the last game. Here come the name tags, everybody. All right, so we have to go pick one. We go pick one.

You have to go physically grab the name tag you want to play for. There's even some in the balcony, you guys. It's intense. Right here. Yeah, yeah, please. Go physically. Be careful if you have to jump off the stage. But go ahead.

There's a guy that's yelling Sarah Silverman, so he must have a name tag that speaks to her in some way. I apologize to the guy who brought a lightsaber, that it's an all-female panel. So the lightsaber's probably not going to get chosen. Neither is the guy with the squid on his head. Just because that's creepy for a boy or a girl. Amy got something delicious.

Sarah has what looks like a bag of something. It's from Chipotle? I don't know. Tig might have just taken this as an opportunity to leave. She might have just bailed.

People are excited. I think she took more than one. You can follow that gentleman over there, that door to your left. There you go. And then just go down that long hallway. Don't be afraid. What's at the end of that long hallway?

Amy did leave. And then you're right back on stage. Is there semen in here? There's a white... Amy has a trophy. We're so proud of her. I'm always so scared of... Oh, Todd just texted me.

What did he say? Sarah, what did he say? What did he say? He's in a loud place. Can we eat these? Ask him, text him the question. Are these, no. How does that bit end?

I'm so hungry. You could sit this next game out, Tig. Why? I'm just, I was just joking around. What's your name tag? I don't get it. Can you eat this? Who did you pick?

What? What's your name tag? Mine? Yeah. I don't know. Tell us. Han Solo. Oh, Lou.

Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. No problem, Lou. Guys, seriously Whose drink did I just kick over? Sarah's Oh, she wasn't

That's just water, right? Diet Coke Diet Coke More Diet Coke for Sarah, please No, she's alright She's good with the chips and guacamole from Chipotle. Oh, that's great. I'm eating all of Nicky's.

Is it a guy named Chip? That would be great. Who's the name on the bag? You need the microphone. Did you take... Spencer. This is spicy. Spicy guacamole? Did you put weed in that?

There's something white and phlegmy in it. I'm avoiding. Till the end. Okay, so Sarah's playing for Spencer. And Nikki's playing for... Chris. And he brought a bunch of tiny cupcakes Oh those look great

All different flavors And Amy's playing for Um I'm playing for Jesus I'm playing for Claire Or Claim Claire Oh that must be my eggnog

No that's Thank you so much must be my eggnog. No, that's... Thank you so much for getting my eggnog. That's a soda for Sarah. Sorry. Tastes like eggnog. I'm telling you, they're working on eggnog. Look at that guy. He's got his hand on his chin. That means he's thinking.

How can I make eggnog? What can I do? Maybe if I found some processed cheese? He's like mixing a strawberry yoo-hoo with some nutmeg and trying to kind of... Is that what you're doing, buddy? I know that one. No pull.

Claire? Is who you're playing for? I'm playing for Claire. Okay. What are we playing? She didn't even look psyched. We're going to play the Leonard Moulton game. Is there alcohol in this? No. It tastes...

Does your Coke taste like it has alcohol in it? Like a rum in Coke? Is there pee-pee in there? Did you put pee-pee in my Coke? Hey, enough! You guys, we've been tough enough on the Asians tonight. Ha ha ha ha ha. What do you think this is? Enough, you guys. We've been tough enough on the Asians tonight. Ha ha ha ha ha.

Where you at, Asians? Let's hear it, Asians. Yeah, I thought so. Pipe down. In the motherfucking Asians. Asians. Yay, Asians. Asians, Yay, Asians. Asians, put your hands up.

That's how Amy talks at the house. Good morning, Tick. I call them Yasians. Because I celebrate them. Yasians. Yay. Is this an all Asian show? Yeah.

I wish. I was making a play on all ages. Like ages? Oh, all ages. I get it. Are you by any chance Laotian? Oh. Korean. You couldn't tell her? So close. Another type of Asian.

She has huge boobs and then my friend Kulop has huge boobs. And she's Asian. Her boobs are real? And I didn't know if that was a thing. I didn't know that. The Laotian girl on King of the Hill doesn't have huge boobs. Can we move on?

I was like, it doesn't make sense. No, those boobs are 100% real. She's like 10, but whatever. She wears her Les Mis t-shirt. You've never seen Cosette look so... Oh, shit. Nobody's on their own. Why is your face so fat, Cosette?

She's all natural. She's all natural, gorgeous woman. Yeah. She's amazing. Past and future guest. Let's play the Leonard Mullen game. We got our name tags. We got audience excitement

Is that a fever pitch I'm sorry this is in front of me I can't believe this is happening First player to two points Is going to seal the deal And win some prizes for somebody in the audience And Sarah Silverman Gets to go first

Sarah Silverman gets to go first. Ooh, Sarah Silverman. Yeah. Name droppers. And then we will go... We'll go to Tig from Sarah. So get ready, Tig. Sarah gets to pick a category.

Would you like... Matt Damon is celebrating a birthday today. Yeah. So this is the films of Matt Damon. Oh, I love him. I do. I know I made that video, but that was just...

The three hours I ever knew him, I'm no super fan otherwise. He is great. There was a picture of him in touch with his daughter's backpack on, holding her hand. I was like, oh. It was the hottest thing I've ever seen. You totally wanted to come on his daughter and her backpack. I came like a guy.

When we shot that I'm fucking Matt Damon thing, he had a hard out at noon because he had to be at his daughter's Halloween pageant. So hot. So hot. So hot. Fuck.

Guys, let's get out of here. That's the extent they know of him. That's a good one. What else? Okay, more. You get more options. Mitch Fanderson suggested we're going to need a bigger float. And that's movies that have a parade

in them. And then, at Lazy Comedy on Twitter suggested... I thought we weren't going to talk about Todd anymore. Suggested M&Ms, and that's movies that have a masked

murderer in them. Masked and murdering. I'm gonna go Matt Damon. You're going Matt Damon? Alright. Ladies love it. Not all ladies. He's amazing.

If you saw movies, you would love him. But not as much as Han Solo. Stop making Han Solo hold the mic, Cortick. I'm bored. You're using his honks for your solo. At home, you would die if you could see what word

they like that even in the side section. He looks like Indiana Jones when you have a whip in his hand. Like Han Solo showed up on the wrong set. You throw me the idol, I'll throw you the whip. Okay. This movie, Sarah, with Matt Damon, is from either, you get to pick a year, 1997 or 2010

97 or 2010 2010 Okay This movie got two stars from our friend Leonard Maltin Len? Yeah, you made out with him once, I didn't Leonard Maltin Wow

What? It was like a year ago almost that you made out with him Was it just one year? Leonard Maltin. Yeah. Wow. What? It was like a year ago, almost, that you made out with him. Was it just one year? Was it the Night of 100 Stars? No, you said it was last year. Night of Too Many Stars. Yeah, yeah. This movie, according to Leonard, two stars, like I said.

He also says that it's yet another example of how daring and unconventional the material is for this particular director and he also says about it that it opens with a frighteningly realistic depiction of a some sort of scary a scary thing that happens. Yeah. And he lists 13 names. I can name it in two names, I think. Two names, she says. So now we go to

Han Solo with a whip. I might be so wrong. A.K.A. Tig Notaro. And you can either say name it or you can bid even less names if you think you can get it in like one name. I know people probably think I'm kidding

but I don't know what's going on right now. Like in the slightest bit. You should have said ten names. I think you have to ask Sarah to name that movie. Name that movie? I'll give you the two names, Sarah. They are Jennifer Lewis and...

Who the fuck is that? My buddy Stephen R. Sharippa. Jennifer Lewis and my buddy Steven R. Sharippa. Oh, you start from the bottom. What am I thinking? Very embarrassing, Sarah. Sorry, guys. I thought it was...

Yeah, well, it wasn't. I had no idea Steve Sharippa was in this. I'm going to say this again. I believe he doesn't die in a train store in this movie. Like he did on The Sopranos. This is, I'm guessing, a Soderbergh movie. Wasn't he on our flight? And I'm guessing...

Yeah, he was. There's a goddamn eggnog! There's a motherfucking eggnog! Gramercy Theater style! Oh! Are they kissing? Yes! Wow.

Gramercy Theater. I could see it. I'm not allowed to drink eggnog. You can't even drink it. Because of so many medical conditions. But oh well. No! I think a new Hollywood holiday

and Hollywood classic has been formed. Tig gets an eggnog. That'd be a great series of children's books. Tig gets a, and each time it's a different thing that Tig gets. You got a guess, Sarah? Yeah, I mean, I just, because it said the real thing at the beginning,

I thought it, contagion. That's a great guess. But it's not, huh? No, no, no. It's like oceans or something. No, no, no. It's like oceans or something No no no It's called Hereafter And it starts with a tsunami

Yes Yeah yeah And there's a new tsunami movie Coming out with Naomi Watts Oh shit And Ewan McGregor It looks like the most depressing movie Like it seems like you just cry

I cried through the whole trailer Yeah Everyone around me was like Reaching for life It seems like you just cried. I cried through the whole trailer. Yeah. Everyone around me was like reaching for life vests. I'm fucking out now, right? Just for this. You didn't really lose anything. Oh, really?

No, but we did put Tig on the board with a point. Tig on the board. Tig on the board. Am I in or out? You're in. This is how she does it. You have a point. I'm going to use this time to put my calories in my calorie counter. But I will be listening. There's alcohol in my eggnog.

What kind of shit did you put in there? What'd you put in there? I think they got it from down the street somewhere. Where'd my waitress go? They got it at one of those eggnoggery bodegas that pop up this time of year. All right, so since Tig challenged Sarah, we're going to start with Amy

and then head in the direction of Tig again. It's coming right back at you, Tig. Yeah, well. Nikki gets to pick between the following categories. Wait, Amy. Nikki. Girl!

No, Amy, I'm sorry. Girl! Amy. Amy gets to pick. They're different people! At, I met them both on Last Comic Standing, I can't keep them straight. At LL Cariel. I beat you on that show. You totally beat my ass.

You came in two places ahead of me on that show and in life. We voted for Dunk. People say, people come to me all the time. I voted for you on Last Comic, and it's like, I got kicked off before the voting part started, you lying asshole. This is shit. They're just trying to be supportive.

Yeah. The category is Taken, and that's movies where someone loses their virginity. Let me stop you right there. Or, I gotta read three categories. Gotta do it, because I gotta share these great categories. At Philip A. Bell suggested on Twitter,

saw four, and that's movies Doug Benson saw more than four times. Oh, that's so cool. Pretty much I'm the only one who knows the answers on that one. And then, at Rob Bear, B-A-I-E-R, suggested Ice Ice Baby, and that's movies featuring Ice-T, Ice Cube, or Jennifer Grey. Oh, my God.

Which one of those would you like to play, Amy Schumer? Taken. Taken? Would you like a lost virginity movie from 1999 or 2005? 2005. Good, good, what, good, yes. Thank you. Thank you.

All right, we're coming to you, Tig, next. Two and a half stars from Leonard for this movie from 2005. I know what it is. Come on! He's only given it once. He says this movie is the first starring vehicle of the lead actor,

and he also says... Take it, too. ...that this movie is sweet. It's from 2005, two and a half stars. Leonard names 12 names in the cast. How many names do you think you can name it in reading from the

bottom to the top? Those clues were eight. I can name it in six names. That's a strong opening bid. Now we go to Tig. Oh, fuck. I forgot Tig was after me. Doug.

I still don't know what's going on. I mean, how come Tig was after me? What? No, the order switches each time, so you don't know what's going on. I mean, how come Ted was after me? What? No, the order switches each time, so you don't have the same... Yeah, pay attention, Sarah. We want to vote on new rules. So it's not the same dynamic.

Nikki may never get to play. Nikki. She's just sitting there waiting for January. Name that movie. You. You. You. He says name it. Amy, don't.

I have faith in you. I have faith in you, Amy. Really? Yeah. Two and a half stars from Leonard. 2005. Someone loses their virginity in this movie, and he says about it that the lead actor

is their first starring vehicle, and he also says that it's sweet. Oh, I know what it is. Your six names are Dave Koechner, Cedric Yarbrough, Mo Collins, Nancy Walls, Jane Lynch, and Leslie Mann.

Oh. It is called... 40-Year-Old Virgin. That's correct. Yay! Hello. Hello. What? I wish I hadn't done that. Sit down. It is called 40 year old virgin That's correct Yay Hello Hello What? I wish I hadn't done that Sit down Sorry

Sorry I regret that I knew that Sorry you guys Sorry about that As victory dances go It wasn't that bad Alright really? I liked it

I could top it Okay Okay I can't see you All I see is Han Solo on your knee Right now That's all you need to see Han Solo and Nog top everything

If you have both of those things, you're good God damn it Alright, so that means, Nikki, you're up Yeah, here we go And then it's going to go in Sarah's direction After Nikki And Nikki gets to pick between the following categories. At Kubrick97 suggested stoned presidents.

And that's movies by Oliver Stone about presidents. Narrows it down to about three. If you don't include Alexander. And then it's Columbus Day, you guys, so I had to do a category, movies about Christopher Columbus or directed by Christopher Columbus. All right.

And then your third choice, at Nurse Jess G suggested Die Hard, and that's movies where someone dies during sex. Mainstream non-pornography where someone dies. I can't think of one, but I'm going to choose that one, Die Hard. Oh, you like that one? Yeah.

Okay. Wow. All right. Yeah. Okay. Wow. All right. Yeah. Get ready, Sarah. This is from... All right, really? What's happening over there?

Oh, my God. I just took the most amazing shot. Oh, she's getting a good shot of Han Solo... I want to see. ...riding on Tig's knee. Or leg, I should say. Are you guys good? You should text that to them.

Real quickly, what's your number? Audience. Audience, give us your number. It's really good Come up here for a second Oh my god It's amazing Oh that is nice

Can we see it on the screen here? Let's go ahead Let's put it on the screen Let's also see a clip from Star Wars And a clip from the John Stewart Bill O'Reilly debate. Because I couldn't get any of that on my computer.

Oh, it was two nights ago. Yeah, yeah. And there was some sort of technical glitch, so it was hard for people to see. It's on their website. Yeah, you can watch it right now if you want. Nikki, you've chosen Die Hard. Yes.

Someone dies having sex in this movie. It's from 1980. Three stars from Leonard. He says this movie, the lead character is bubble-headed and he also says that this movie was

later a TV series. It was later a TV series. The bubble-headed lead. Someone dies having sex. And Leonard names... Question? 15 names. Bubble-headed.

15 names. I'll name it in 15 names. Smartest opening vid we've heard all night. Congratulations. I'm just going to be honest. Sarah, what are you going to do with that? I'll name it in 14 names.

I like where this is going. Am I next? Yeah. What should I do? I'll say name it. Name that movie. What? I don't know what's going on. That's some bullshit.

She asked me what she should do. I call bullshit, but let's do it. Let's do it. I think I might know what it is. You get 14 out of 15 names. Great. So good luck to all of us. Because someone in the audience is going to explode.

I know what it is. I think I know what it is. They're going to have to say it. Well, let me start naming names because you've been wrong before. Craig T. Nelson. Gretchen Wyler, the great Gretchen Wyler. Richard Hurd. Sally Kirkland.

Remember her? Academy Award nominated. I do. You do not. P.J. Souls. The. P.J. Souls. The great P.J. Souls. Hal Williams. Albert Brooks.

Yeah, now what are you thinking? I'm kind. I'm kind. You're giving me that face. Harry Dean Stanton. Mary Kay Place. Barbara Berry. Sam Wanamaker. Stanton. Mary Kay Place. Barbara Berry.

Sam Wanamaker. Right, Barbara Berry played Hal Linden's wife in Barney Miller. That's right. And she was Academy Award nominated for her supporting turn in Breaking Away. Oh, yeah! I found Hal Linden's wallet on Christmas Day

about 15 years ago. Oh my god. I think Tig wins this round. Did I win? Point to Tig. Point to Tig. And I returned it. To Hal Linden? Yeah, and then he invited me to his play

on Broadway and I was like, I didn't want all this. I was just trying to get your wallet back to you. I brought it home to my friend's uncle and aunt's house and I was like, I found this wallet in a taxi. And they were like, this is Barney Miller. Alright, keep going.

So then I was like, okay, I'll just, I was like, I was like, I hadn't seen that movie or TV show in a while, so we called and got in touch with his manager, and then... I don't know. It's really not that interesting.

You guys go back to what you were talking about. Sam Wanamaker. Robert Weber. Armand Asante Oh okay yeah That's what I thought it was And Ellen Eileen Brennan

Yeah And the movie's called Private Benjamin That's correct Wow Nicely done We have a three way tie Who died?

Huh? Who died? Arm? Who died? Armand Asante. He died? Was getting it on with Goldie Hawn, and he died. And when she was alone, she decided to join the military. It's a fun movie. I can't remember.

I can't believe I'm saying this because I love him so much, but I do not remember Albert Brooks in that movie. He plays her, I think, like, former husband who's kind of a slubby dude, maybe? I don't know. I gotta go back and look at it, because I do like... What? Oh, he dies.

Albert Brooks dies. Albert Brooks dies, and then after... Yeah, because Armando Sante, after she's already been in the military, she sees him again and he's dancing. She meets him, and then they, yeah, that's right. I didn't want to cross you. Nice job. Albert Brooks dies.

He's like, has a yarmulke on. I remember it now. I remember. And then they jump off that ship and they're like yelling each other's names. No, that swept away. No, you're thinking of Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet, I think. Oh, I don't remember anything. That's Captain Hook.

No, she's talking about Shipwrecked with Kurt Russell. DiCaprio and Kate Winslet, I think. That's Captain Hook. No, she's talking about Shipwrecked with Kurt Russell. Overboard. Yeah, same difference. Or Captain Ron. Who knows? Great movie. Okay, so we got a tie all the way around

here, and who challenged who there? Tig challenged Sarah, right? So we'll start with Amy and go towards Nikki. So we get Nikki involved in this, finally. And Amy gets to pick a category between the following.

Would you like, this is the asparagus pea category. And this is where I read the entire review of a movie, leaving out the actors' names, and then the bidding starts. That makes it harder. Why is that asparagus pea?

It makes it a different game, for sure. Or the king of pancakes category, which is the number one movie at the box office ten years ago to this very day. Number one movie 10 years ago. Han Solo's

in the middle of a daredevil mission. Oh my god, Han Solo's He's hanging over the Sarlacc pit. He's rappelling down to the eggnog. Yeah, I know what he's doing. We travel together. He's holding

up her mic. Thanks, buddy. Go ahead. Or the fragrant bleach category, which is movies that were mentioned tonight during Build-A-Title.

Yeah, can you remember back that far? No. I know I can't. We mentioned you went like three. Han Solo just hit the ground. Hit the ground like a slab of carbonite. But his attitude's like this. So what?

Yeah, but then his face is worried. He's got a good attitude, but you still have to either set him on fire or bury him after he touches the ground. Who cares? Pancakes. Pancakes. Ten years ago, to this very day, this movie was number one. Leonard Maltin gives it two stars. He calls this movie needless.

Needless. That's pretty harsh He also says that Frank Whaley and Mary Beth Hurt Appear unbilled And I'm going to give you a third clue Because those first two were so great He also says Ellen Burstyn's voice Is uncredited

You hear Ellen Burstyn's voice In this movie from 2002. Two stars from Leonard and he lists... It was number one ten years ago to this very day. I think it was also a Monday and... or a Sunday.

Fifteen names he lists. Fifteen names. Han Solo is hanging by a leg. He's back, you guys. He's back in it. I can name it in seven names. Oh, no. Han Solo's about to fall into the Chipotle pit.

Oh, no. He's like, chips! Oh no, he's in a bag of chips He hates chips He's all that and a bag of chips Guys, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm just getting back into the swing of things Name that movie, Amy

You cunt! Wait, what happened? What happened? How you say cunt? What happened? Nikki said I should name it. How many names did you bid? Seven. You cunt.

Out of 14? Yeah, seven out of 14. That's what Amy said? Yeah. And then Nikki said name it? Yeah. Yeah, is that crazy? No.

No. Okay. I think when you're called the C word, you probably just did something smart. Smart. You did something that brought up a special kind of anger in another person. And it's usually by being smart.

I'm sorry. Like when you get a parking spot that I was trying to get into. Yeah. I don't use the C word, you guys. Me neither. Not cool. Not cool, bros.

Only special occasions when I'm sitting next to Nikki Glaser. I use it. No, you don't. When do you say it? In her acts all the time. You've seen her filthy acts.

All of the tracks on my CD. That's the name of the time. You've seen her filthy act. All of the tracks on my CD. That's the name of the bits. I love cunt number three. It's my favorite. It's my favorite cunt of all the tracks. That's about shopping. It's my favorite. That one's about shopping.

Seven names? I think I said nine Who can remember? I guess just read all of them I'll tell you when I got it I'm just going to read seven Take it from the top I'll give you the clues again if you like

No, no, no, that's okay Pancakes Here's your seven names I'm excited that if you blow this, that we're going to have a four-way tie. That's exciting to me. Ooh, a four-way. Yeah.

Am I still in the game? Yeah. Yeah. You're tied for first. Your first of seven names is Lalo Schifrin. Got it. Who is a music composer for a movie, so I don't know what the fuck he's doing in it.

John Rubenstein, Frankie Faison, As Your Sky, Stanley Anderson, Ken Leung. Are you reading the names from 9-11? I've been meaning to do that because the anniversary passed a while ago.

Yeah, that's very nice. All right, now give me the real names of the real actors. Good time to slip them in. Oh, God. meaning to do that because the anniversary passed a while ago. I thought this was a good time to slip them in. Oh, God. Stanley Anderson. The great Stanley Anderson. Oh, I already said him. Bill Duke.

Bill Duke, who I think directed Waiting to Exhale. He did. Someone back me up on that. Where's the black person? There's always one at my shows. I don't know any of those actors. You don't?

Ken Leung. Ken Leung Ken Leung what are the clues again? 2002 I was a junior in college it was needless this movie some guy in the audience is trying to help I don't know why

number one I'm excited about a four way tie let's see you're in luck, Doug. It's going to happen? It is already happening. The number one movie at the box office 10 years ago today. Give us more names first.

Was the needless remake of Manhunter. Oh. Based on Thomas Harris's novel. I've never heard of that even. It's called Red Dragon. What? Oh. Oh, I auditioned for that.

It was filmed in Baltimore. Oh, my God. Did you really? Happy anniversary. We've got a four-way time! Motherfucker! Everybody get something? Was the sixth name Amy Schumer? What?

The sixth name was Amy Schumer. Yeah, you were in it also. Anthony Heald. He was the guy that Hannibal the Cannibal ate for dinner at the end of Silence of the Lambs. Remember Ellen Burns' voice in that? Philip Seymour Hoffman.

It was a great cast, but not a particularly good movie. Oh. So now we're going into the final round. Sudden death. This is going to settle this shit. This is so nerve-wracking. Once and for all.

Who is going to go next after Nikki? It was Sarah, right? Yeah. Okay, so we're going to start with Sarah and then head back towards Nikki. And Sarah gets to pick the category between the following. In theaters now, that's motion pictures that are

in theaters now. In theaters how, that's movies covered on How Did This Get Made podcast. Oh! That's good. Or in theaters ow, Get Made podcast. Ow! That's good. Or In Theaters

Ow! And that's movies that have torture in them. So do you want Now, How, or Ow? I'm gonna go Ow. Good call. In Theaters Ow.

Sitting Through the Master felt like torture Does that count? Sitting through what? The Master 2004 is the year What? Was I supposed to add something to that? No

Yeah, that was pretty bad Amy Adams didn't even wear tight pants Yeah, totally. She was naked in one scene, but pregnant naked. Oh, yeah. Guys! Baby knew.

You are right about that. Pregnant naked. There's no excuse for that. Human bodies are amazing and beautiful. Human body helping itself. Were you going to say something about... No. Oh.

I can read your mind. Doug? Back to you. I can't hear you guys. I don't know what's happening over there. Who's starting this? Sarah? Yeah.

Okay. Human body, yeah. Oh, that's right. I don't know what's happening over there. Who's starting this? Sarah? Yeah. Okay. Human body out. Oh, that's right. I mean, what? Human body out. I was thinking of a song that Tig and Kyle wrote, a beautiful song about the human body helping itself out. I love that. I'd like to sing it for you right now.

Let's do it. You have to do the things too. Well, here's the thing. I was on my computer and then my back itched and then I went to itch it but I couldn't reach it and then I went like this.

Oh, thanks. I went like this. I was just sitting there going and it was further down my back so I went like that and then I could reach further down my back. I went like this. I was just sitting there going, and it was further down my back, so I went like that. And then I could reach further down my back, and I was like, oh, my God. That's hilarious. My body just helped itself out. And it can happen also, like, when you're trying to reach something,

you can't get it. Watch my feet. Or you're cold. So Kyle and I made a video. I told him one day, because a couple other people, they were like, that's stupid. And I was like, my sweetie will get it. So I told Kyle, and then we made a video. And it's really funny.

How can you see it? You just use your eyeballs. You are the shittiest at promoting your own stuff of any person I know, and that's why I love you. I think of your YouTube, like Tig and Kyle human body. Yeah, just type a bunch of words into YouTube. Good luck. Yeah, well, come up. Why give anything specific?

People need to find this buried treasure. I like how on a podcast no one knows that you pushed your elbow with your other hand. They know, Doug. That physical humor. They've been on a computer and had their back itch.

Sarah, the year is 2004. Three stars from Leonard Maltin. He says this movie is about two strangers. He also says that it is unpleasant.

And he also says that it is unpleasant. And he also says that it is intense. Oh, effective. He also throws in effective. I'll throw in effective. Three stars in the category of torture. And there are ten names listed. How many names do you think you get it in, Sarah? I can name it in ten names.

That's a smart opening bit. Is this where I say name that movie? I wish, but it's not up to you now. We go to Nikki Glaser. Beautiful Nikki Glaser. You might not have to get involved, Tig. She says nine?

I just said to you, she says nine? Yes, she does. Good bitchy. She puts the? Yeah. I just said to you, she says nine? Yes, she does. Good bitch, she. She puts the lotion in. Good bitch, she. Who's gonna say that? What does this other she say? Amy, Amy she.

She says name it, cunt. I've heard name it, bitch, but that is the first name it, cunt on the show. Milestones. That's what she wants her to name it. Thank you. Name my cunt. Ashley.

Thank you. Yeah, makes sense. Wouldn't it be Rename? Do you have a suggestion? We'll talk about it at the house. Oh, god damn it Nikki

Yes You get the names right? How many? Yeah nine I said four go Here's your four names You get nine out of ten names? Yeah

Okay I'm feeling good for you Thanks I'm not feeling great for you Here's your four names. Wait, you get nine out of ten names? Yeah. Okay. I'm feeling good for you. Thanks. I'm not feeling great for you. Okay. But I'm feeling good for you. 2004, Torture.

Okay. Two Strangers. Two Strangers. Two Strangers. Yeah. Oh, okay. One Loft. You might know it already.

Yeah. People start getting it. Dina Meyer. Shawnee Smith. Yeah, people know it already. Yeah. Dina Meyer. Shawnee Smith. Yeah, people know it already. Mackenzie Vega. Ken Leung. What? What?

Fucking Ken Leung is in everything. Tobin Bell. Yeah, right? God. No. Michael Emerson. Lee Wendell. This is really hitting home.

Monica Potter. Monica Potter. Monica Potter. Miss Potter. And Danny Glover. I don't know any of these people. What is this movie called, Nikki Glaser? Danny Glover, Torture, 2004.

You're really still thinking about it? Yeah, I have no idea. Oh. Yes. Really? Yes. No. Yes.

Oh, wait. No. No, that's. What's the category? What's the category? Torture. And what's the name of the movie? Ouch.

Ouch. You got three seconds Hostile Oh such a good guess But I guess you didn't see Saul See Saul Motherfucker Oh there goes Amy Schumer With her trophy

Amy be careful Slow down Did she win? Amy Schumer is our winner for Claire. Where's Claire? Come on up here, Claire. Sorry, Chris. I want to thank my mom and my parents and everyone but my therapist. Hey, Doug, I forgot to... Where's Claire at? Claire, get up here, girl. Does she have to go?

Hey, girl. Doug, I forgot to put my present in there. Claire, you deserve it. I'm going to sign it. Oh, yeah. Professor Blastoff. Or do you not want me to sign it? Takes killer podcast.

Shut up. Claire, have you enlisted the sock bun on your head tonight? You did a great job. Wait, what is that? The sock bun is something that I googled to learn how to do it, and now I know how to do it. Oh, that's cool. You can make a bun on the top of your head by cutting a sock

and then rolling it and then rolling your hair around it. She's standing there like she has to wait for the tribute to finish. Do it. Don't leave. That's awesome. That's cool. Good call. Don't leave.

I want to talk more about your sock bun. Sock bun. I have questions about your sock bun. Oh, press conference about your sock bun. Claire, over here. Two-part question. How did you hear about the sock bun. Oh, press conference about your sock bun. Claire, over here, a two-part question. How'd you hear about the sock bun and when did you start

using it? Claire, Claire, question. I have another one. If you hadn't done the sock bun, what would you have done? Claire, one more question.

Just one more. Claire, Claire. Claire. Could my hair do a sock bun? Claire, please don't make it a bad... Claire, Claire, please don't shake your hair.

I'm scared your sock bun is going to fall out. Claire, one more from Sock Bun Monthly? Claire, please don't make it a bad... Claire, Claire, please don't shake your hair. I'm scared your sock bun's gonna fall out. Claire, one more from Sock Bun Monthly. Claire, quit looking at Amy. Claire, I fucking need you. Claire, can I have that... Claire, can I have that bag? Do you need this trophy back? Did you win this?

Yeah, what did you win it for? Claire, please step away from the stage. What, what, what, what? Claire, please step away from the stage. Claire, don't go anywhere. You stay right where you are, Claire. Congratulations on whatever that trophy was for. Claire!

Claire! Come here! So she doesn't get hers read, right? No, yeah, she doesn't get to name a shithead because she won. I won. I won last time, too. Thank you to Jimmy for throwing some Reese's cups up here That's good

Why am I standing Appreciate it Jimmy And we need For Lou Slash Han Solo And for Sarah's Chipotle bag We need a shithead for each of those So if you could step up

And just write it down On this piece of paper here I'll give you a pen Where's the Sir please step away from the stage Sir Are you Lou You're Lou Oh you're Lou okay on this piece of paper. Here, I'll give you a pen. Where's the... Sir, please step away from the stage. Sir. Are you Lou?

You're Lou? Oh, you're Lou. Okay. Short for lunatic. You're on fire. Good one. And Spencer, who went to the trouble of going to the Chipotle

three doors down. But these chips have been delicious. Thank you so much, Spencer. And just write down on one of those blank lines there someone for me to name a shithead. Amy, do you got anything to plug before we go? When is it going to be on?

A couple days. I'm at Levity Live in Nyack this weekend. That's a place and a place? Yeah, Levity Live, Nyack. That's a place and a place. You'll be there this weekend? Yeah. The whole weekend?

No, this weekend I'll be hanging out. But next weekend I'll went to. You'll be there this weekend? Yeah. The whole weekend? What am I going to do? No, this weekend I'll be hanging out, but next weekend I'll be at Levity Live. Okay. Nikki? I'll be at Yuck Yucks in Edmonton. Brat. In Edmonton, wherever that is.

Canada. I mean, but there's a territory that it's in, or a province or something. They know we don't respect that. Edmonton, Alberta. Edmonton, Alberta. Edmonton, Alberta, yes. Okay, Sarah, anything to promote? Thursday I'll be at Northeastern University.

Should we just kill ourselves tonight? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's do it. Homecoming. That sounds fun. At Northeastern with Nikki Swartzen. Oh, that'll be really fun. I want to go to that.

Yeah. He's a friend of mine. Who Tig knows personally. Oh. What do you got coming up, Tig? Nothing. Oh, you know what? I actually do.

I have a new CD out. It's called live people think it's live but it's live but I like that people called it live at the airport yourself I know but I wasn't going to go into that. Okay, Sarah and I were flying here. And we were at the airport. And I accidentally called my CD live. It's called Live, though. But it's Live. Where are you? Where are you going to be?

I'll be performing Live at... He's doing a one-man show here. I'll be doing a Douglas Mov At Cobbs in San Francisco on Halloween Dress your shit up San Francisco Are we working together on New Years? I think so but that's not released yet To the public I just said New Years that's all I said

Somewhere Amy and I are going to be together on New Years Somewhere together But nobody knows what day that is We're not performing but we just want you to know we'll be together. We won't be anywhere near each other at midnight. Do I owe you anything for that eggnog? Okay.

Okay. Yeah, so go to douglasmovies.com for all of my dates and information. As always, thank you New York City for coming out. Bravo, Steve. Big fan.

Such a great crowd. Those of you that were at the last show, this one was even better, right? Bunch of dudes. Bunch of dudes. Bunch of dudes. Bunch of stupid dudes last time. Finally, we got some show for the ladies.

Standing ovation from Asian with large breasts. All right. Get your tits up, everyone. Korean, not LaRation. All right. Well, as always, all teams in the VAA except NYU are a shithead. The Baltimore Orioles is a shithead. I didn't know your demo were such jocks.

I didn't think so either. And Ticketmaster Surcharges is a shithead. Yeah! Play the end theme. Thank you. For you, cause the club will win!