Doug Loves Movies - T.J. Miller, Jason Mantzoukas, and Lennon Parham Guest

Episode Date: December 4, 2012

Doug welcomes comic actors T.J. Miller, Jason Mantzoukas, and Lennon Parham to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers screaming, taking sticky seats with 50 ads and popcorn kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see, cause Doug loves movies. For some reason I like how they enunciate in his teeth. I like that part. I don't know why. Hey everybody.

Just because it's a lighter crowd doesn't mean we're going to have a conversation. Don't try to talk to me directly. Thank you very much. My name is Doug and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. Coming to you from the UCB Theater in Los Angeles on Tuesday December 4th to

Oceans 12. I went up on that to wow you guys up. So tonight is the Comedy Bang Bang final show Nativity Pageant. It's an annual Christmas show that they do

it's over at the Ricardo Montalban theater where all the seats are made of Corinthian leather and it's a big show tonight and it starts it overlaps so it starts at 8 o'clock and we start at 7.30 and go to 8.15

so this is, Jordan back me up on this probably the smallest crowd for Douglas movies that in the history of the show yeah so people are clapping yeah finally we got the intimate show we've always wanted having it elbow those other 40 or 50 fucks because this place isn't that big to begin with so it's it's interesting it feels I think this is gonna be a fun show nonetheless and I do appreciate you guys being here but I guess it's just between a lot of the people being at that other show and then

also the confusion of note there's no more comedy bang bang so what is the future of Doug Loves Movies here at UCB next year we will still be doing most Tuesdays you know just like it's been going some Tuesdays I'll be out of town or something but most Tuesdays

but at a new time let's see how Jordan feels about this 7 o'clock. Perfect? You like that better? All right. So the show will go from 7 to 7.45. It's not going to be longer because of the new time slot.

The new time slot is so that the new weekly stand-up show called Put Your Hands Together. Yeah, that's what it's called. I'm not asking you to clap. Put Your Hands Together can start each week at 8 o'clock. It's going to feature a lot of the comics you've been accustomed

to seeing on Comedy Bang Bang and here on Douglas Movies because a lot of the same comics are still going to want to come out and do sets on Tuesday nights. The deal still stands. Anyone with a seat for put your, you know, a ticket for put your hands up together. Put your hands up together.

Let's just call it PYHT and get it over with. Anyone with a ticket to PYHT can stay, if they come to see Douglas movies, can then stay in their seat and have a good seat for the rest of the night and not have to go outside and get in line. So that's the status starting January 8th. Next week, regular show at 7.30.

Then you could stay, I think you, who cares about what's on after me? Next week, come out. It's going to be a really fun show. Super fun show. And then of course on the 18th is 12 Guests of Christmas. And that's already sold out. So come the week before.

If you missed out on that. Since last I spoke and you listened, I participated in a live recording of Pete Holmes' You Made It Weird podcast at Cobbs in San Francisco. And I saw a preview screening of Zero Dark Thirty. One was the nail-biting story

of a group of men trying to stop a monster. And the other was Zero Dark Thirty. Let's look in the prize bag, everybody. We've got Just Dance 3. That's fun.

We've got a t-shirt that we'll show you when the guest gets out here and explains it. We've got five copies of a CD because that particular guest didn't understand how this works. So the winner's gonna get five copies of the same CD.

And just because I got it in the mail, for your consideration, the script for the movie The Sessions. Yeah. I saw the movie The Sessions and I liked it, but I don't need to read it. It doesn't seem necessary. And then, of course, Doug Benson's Smug Life and some

Doug Benson buttons. Doug those movies buttons that I on the bag that the buttons came in, it said Smug Life and some Doug Benson buttons, Doug Loves Movies buttons. On the bag that the buttons came in, it said a Twitter name, so I'll tell you that name in one of the weeks to come because they're nice little buttons, and I appreciate that.

Ladies and gentlemen, please help me in welcoming Lenin Parham, Jason Mantzoukas, and TJ Miller. Thank you. Lenin Parham, Jason Matsoukas, and TJ Miller. Oh, more gifts from Lenin. Started off like a professor okay first of all Lennon I apologize for how little you're going to get in this evening

how little opportunity you're going to have to speak so let's just say hi to you first Lennon Parham is here everybody yeah girl and she brought not only the first pregnancy to the show Yeah girl And she brought Not only The first pregnancy to the show What's up

In the history of the show I was going to say She's gained weight Baby I just caught it Baby I'm glad I was glad to find that out

The baby cooking in there How long How far along is it This is public Four and a half months Oh okay So you're going to be one of those skinny pregnant ladies. I hope so.

Yeah, yeah. I hope you get obese in the last month. Skinny all the way through and then obese in a month. But just like in my face. Just pop out. Is it fun getting to eat anything you want? I can't actually eat anything I want. There's a lot of shit I can't eat at all.

You can't eat cigarettes. Nope. You really shouldn't. That's true. You can't eat booze pops. Nope. Nope. You can't eat your frozen booze popsicles.

With a popsicle stick in it. You got it. Booze pops. You brought a copy of Just Dance 3. That's right, for the Wii. Yeah. Why?

Featuring, featuring Katy Perry's California Girl, so it's real current. I believe my niece has just asked for Just Dance 5 for Christmas.

Oh, God. So that's where we're at in the Just Dance spectrum. That's like trying to rock out to this, like, now is music. What are those called?

Yeah, now is music. What is it called? Now that's what I call music, 17. Volume, yeah, I think they're up to 40-something. Everybody abbreviates to now is music. Well, it's the longest title. You can't remember it. Now that's what I call music.

Now I'll tell you what I think is really some of the hot hits at this point 17 that's how long the title feels so you think you could go out on the floor and cut a rug better than anyone else longer versions right isn't that what we're doing

hashtag longer versions that was TJ Miller with the long thing there and he brought five copies of the TJ Miller with the long thing there. And he brought five copies of the TJ Miller, the extended play EP. It's failing miserably, Doug. It's the most colossal failure of my career. But people love it, though.

People do love it, but they won't pay a goddamn dime for it. I'm in debt over $270,000. I bought every single one of those beats, and I paid 15 young Japanese women to write the lyrics over the course of six and a half months. Jason Manzoukas,

you guys, he yeah. He brought this weird shirt. Why is it weird? Because it's ladies boobies and shorty shorts. I love those.

And a lot of American flag imagery. Because I'm a fucking patriot. And some white space next to her body. Is this something you can buy on the walk over here? Nope. I bought that in Palm Springs.

Yeah. You'll see. Planning ahead? If you look closer, the woman has a Palm Springs tattoo on her. Oh, okay. I believe. Yeah, on her heart with Palm Springs on it. Bought it in Palm Springs.

Thought I was going to wear it as a hilarious joke to the pool. Did not wear it. Became very self-conscious when I put it on. And I was like, I'm going to go down to the pool and wear it. And then I was like, nope. I love the moment of you looking in the mirror and being like, no go. This is a no go. Every step of the way, I was like, this is hilarious.

Hold it up to yourself and show everybody what it would have looked like. I was wondering if you had intercourse in it. Because imagine how bizarre that would be to make love to him as his upper torso was a pretty good looking lady with a rope belt. This is

fucking nice. I like the realism of the pockets hanging down below the cut off shorts. Who has that little denim and that much rope? That ratio. I mean, it's completely off. Right? Why even put the pockets in? Like you had an option.

It's not based in real... It's not a photo. I do love it. And I love... My favorite part of this is that the top of your thighs are also women's thighs. Like, that's sexy. And then it gets into fucking hairy legs.

This is where I was like, this is a home run idea. I'm going to buy this. Yeah, I can only imagine, like, in shorts what that would look like. I put it on. I put it on with my bathing suit. And then I was like, nope. No, this is untenable. I can't do this. Yeah, I can only imagine in shorts what that would look like. I put it on with my bathing suit, and then I was like, nope. No, this is

untenable. I can't do this. Well, to be fair, you were in a Speedo. I was in a Speedo. No, to be fair, I was balls out, just naked. Just fucking naked. Did the tip of your penis hang just below the bottom of the shirt? No, no, no. It just looks like the end of the rope. No, I wish.

I wish it did, but the tip of my penis. Who's your turtle friend? Who's that lizard Cyclops? Why is there a button down low there? Uh-oh. Why are you keeping the turtle between your thighs? To warm him, because

he has hypothermia. There's never a riff that you just walk away from ever. You're just like... That was the completion of the joke. Yeah, you finished it off. Full circle. And we all need now some natural calm, the anti-stress drink.

That's another prize that Lennon brought. You guys, I nailed it tonight. You have to have a wee and you have to be real stressed out. Well, you're going to be freaked out from all the dance, dance, dancing.

That's right. In order to get to sleep that night. Right, exactly. You have to have a natural calm drink. It's a raspberry lemon flavor. Oh, shit.

Which worked up sweating to Katy Perry's California Girls. I love that film. The David Lee Roth video? Mm-hmm. Yes. Have you been in the movies of late, T.J. Miller?

No, but I watched... We were going to watch Lincoln. I found a screener of Lincoln, and we were going to watch that, but then instead I watched the producers, the Mel Brooks film. That is a lot of fun. Have you guys seen that?

With D.O. Ridge. What? With Matthew Broderick and Nathan Lane, right? No. Zero Mostel. Well, now I've been made to feel better.

Gene Wilder. Yeah. It's pretty great. Pretty great movie. It's really fun. And then I tried to watch Rhinoceros Which is also

With Gene Wilder And Zero Mostel And it was I didn't understand it at all It's so bizarre It's called Rhinoceros Yeah It's a Eugene Ionesco

Yeah it didn't make any sense At all that movie Not a fan Thank you for coming Thank you so much for having me. We're done with you. Thanks for having me. Jason, have you seen any movies? Like, have you seen Giraffe

or Elk? Oh, boy. I saw Albatross, which is a British movie. I saw the best movie of the year, which is called Rust and Bone. It's the new Jacques Odiard movie. Nobody here has seen it. It's coming out right now. It's French.

Is that the one with the old lady they say nominated for Best Actress? And be the oldest of all time? Oh no, I bet that's the Amour. From the Michael Haneke movie. This is the guy that did A Prophet. Did anybody see A Prophet?

That movie's heavy. That movie's fucking intense, right? Yeah, yeah. The razor blade in the mouth scene, holy shit, right? Okay, so this is another movie that is as physically intimidating, as intense as A Prophet was. This movie is like an emotional gauntlet. It is a disaster of horrible emotional intensity, and it's fucking awesome. It's a... It's in 3D. Where is it playing? It's in 3D, right? There was a disaster of horrible emotional intensity, and it's fucking awesome.

It's in 3D. Where is it playing? It's in 3D, right? There was a screening of it. There was a screening of it, and it's now going to be out, I think, or is maybe already out in random theaters. Yeah, it'll be available soon.

Go see it for emotional rollercoaster. It's fucking awesome. I also saw the best movie of the year. Wait, wait, wait. Called Wreck-It Ralph. Which one was... Yeah, Wreck-It Ralph. Which one was... Yeah, Wreck-It Ralph is great. I was going to use that as a joke reference.

Nope. No joke reference. Movie is a fucking home run. That's it. Emotional intensity to the degree that I have never felt. What if you're just a really sensitive guy? I say anything you say. A harrowing journey of emotional intensity.

Wreck-It Ralph. Did you see Maximum Rush? I also saw the best movie of the year called Maximum Rush. Joe Gordon-Levitt. Bikes. Is that that one? Yeah. Is that what it's called?

No. Premium Rush. Premium Rush. Joe Gordon-Levitt. Remake of Quicksilver. That's right. You know what I'm talking about. I love his movie Absolute Fast.

Premium Rush. That's the one where he's in a hurry to not eat. Premium Rush is just like Premium Rush is like a title that's just supposed to attract idiots. You're like, I don't want to have that feeling. It doesn't say anything about the film.

It's just like, trust me, it's going to be a wild ride. I want to know the guys that walk out of that movie, they're like, see bro, I told you, premium rush. For a moment, I thought that rush wasn't going to be completely premium. I thought it was just going to be like fucking regular rush. But then a bus almost hit him.

Turns out, premium rush. No go on the bus hitting him. I also saw the worst movie of the year, Silver Linings Playbook. I said backstage, I won't see a film with that many syllables in the title. I've had that policy years now. Oh, really? Because backstage

you said six weeks. Well, each week has felt like an emotional rollercoaster. That's why you wouldn't go with me to see the Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus. Did you just fall asleep? He fell asleep on his own podcast. That's right. With a pregnant woman.

I got confused between the Heath Ledger movie and the Dustin Hoffman movie. What was his called? Hoffman. Of Dr. Parnassus. The Imaginarium. Hoffman. Of Dr. Parnassus. The Imaginarium. Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus. No, it wasn't. That's what it's called.

Dr. Parnassus. No, no, no. The one with Natalie Portman. Yeah. Mr. Magorium. Oh, Magorium's Emporium. Mr. Magorium's Emporium. Couldn't be Mr. Hop's Shop.

That would be a great film. Had to be. My name's Magorium. I guess I gotta open an emporium. The hop shop. I'm as pigeonholed as the Wetzel's pretzel guy. Doug? Doug? Doug, are you okay?

Doug, have you been drinking this calm energy drink? This is the calmest I've ever been on this show. I'm super duper calm. Have you been to the movies, Landon? Are you still doing that documentary, Super Calm Me? Yes.

Super Calm Me. He's just even keeled. He's an ex-all day every day. Another day, pretty calm. For 30 days, I think. 30 days of calm? Maybe a few years now. You're just on the phone with AT&T.

You're like, that's fine. That seems fine. That seems fair. Okay. That seems fair. That seems fair and balanced as well. I did. Thanks for asking. I saw the Silver Linings playbook, but I enjoyed it much more than this guy.

Boo. Wait, yeah. So wait a second. Let's have a little debate here. I thought it was fine. I just didn't think it was Everybody's like wet for this movie There's a lot of chemistry

I think they have an amazing chemistry It got shut out by the New York critics I thought she was good I thought he was fine She looks good Her tits are fucking As nice as my jersey You can tell that from the poster

I was like, not enough dancing. Cut to, there's more dancing. There wasn't really though. I mean, that really came in very late.

competition is you see one other competitive team. Yeah, and the dance competition is introduced at the end of the second act and it's like, oh,

do you want to do that dance thing? Yeah, let's do that for 15 minutes and then wrap the movie up. No, if you listen, if you listen like

you're supposed to do to women, you find out in the beginning that she's a really good dancer. She's a really good dancer and her dead husband would never dance with her. How dare you spoil that very long title movie.

Spoiler alert, her husband is dead. You find that out right away, guys. It's in the first page of the playbook. It's on the cover. Nobody ever uses that. Nobody even uses the playbook. Yes, he does. He references it.

Listen. This is a real... This is why you didn't get it. Because you weren't checked in. You gotta check in. We'll be back with Jason and Lennon debating what to expect when you're expecting. After this.

I didn't see it. I also saw Safe House and the end of Some Kind of Wonderful. What did you think of Safe House? Safe House was actually a thrilling roller coaster of emotional... I saw Safe House. It a thrilling roller coaster. Was it heroine? Yes, absolutely.

I saw Safe House. It made the week. It was pretty good news. I really liked it when Denzel was crazy. I think you just liked it because it ended with some kind of wonderful. Like you watched that right after and that lifted the whole experience up. Yeah. Because that's so great at the end. What kind of wonderful does it end up being?

She gets the hearing. Yeah, well, you know, it's John Hughes decided that he ended Pretty in Pink the wrong way when he made it. He literally made Pretty in Pink

and then was like, oh, fuck. I think I just fucked up. I just completely, she should have wound up with Ducky and then she like shafts Ducky

for Blaine or whatever. Oh, no, I think I fucked up. So he made some kind of wonderful to remedy that. Yes. But don't compare with Uncle no, I think I fucked up. So he made some kind of wonderful to remedy that. Yes. But don't compare. And the main thing with Uncle Buck, Curly Sue. Yep.

That's not true. Curly Sue. You can't compare. You should watch Curly Sue again. Oh yeah? Is it underrated? Curly Sue? It is a, it's a real classic. That girl is such a little firecracker. She is. Jesus Christ.

You can't stop her. Except at the end of that movie when she never worked again. She dies. Her father dies. Oh, shoot. Is Curly Sue here? Is Curly Sue here? Curly, are you here? Curly? First name Curly, last name Sue?

Just this elderly redhead is like, I'm here. Wait, she's elderly? Yeah, no, she was... How did she age? Every week for me was a year. Because it's been such a harrowing journey. She's in that new movie, Amor.

Oh, yeah. She's the same, the oldest woman. I love the title of that movie. Amor? Yeah, I love it. I love every goddamn syllable that movie. Amor? Yeah, I love it. I love every goddamn syllable of it. Amor. Can anyone pronounce the name of the girl that's in Beast of the Southern Wild?

Nope. Dikembe Mutombo? Taylor Swift. Kwajume. Quadraphone. If I saw it. One Directionction Qualcomm Stadium But whatever her name is

They say she might get nominated for Best Actress of the Year She should Youngest nominee ever Younger than Anna Paquin from The Piano Of course Wait, younger Oh, that's Supporting Actress For Paper Moon

Tatum O'Neill Well, I guess we'll take off dress for Paper Moon. Tatum O'Neill? Yeah. Well, I guess we'll take off. Doug did just fall asleep again. That's him with his eyes open. He's dead.

Does anyone reindeer for games? Uh-oh. One guy laughed. I guess he wasn't here last week. You know, I'd it to Reindeer for Games for the holidays.

I think that's great. Yeah, I think, yeah, yeah. I think that's real great, man. Jason's right. I mean, that is... I'm fucking stoked for you. That is a great switch up. It keeps the holidays fun,

keeps them guessing. Listeners are like, fuck, they really did It keeps the holidays fun. Keeps them guessing. Listeners are like, fuck! They really did this around the holidays. Listeners will listen to this years from now and go, that was one of those holiday ones. I remember it true! I was on a plane with

Jackie Weaver from Silver Linings playbook. And Animal Kingdom. Yeah, she's amazing in Animal Kingdom. She's really good. She does a good job, I guess. But her character is rather ineffectual. playbook and animal kingdom yeah she's amazing in animal kingdom she's really good silver lining she's a little like you know she does a good job i guess but her character is rather ineffectual a little hammy you kind of wonder what what's going on with that character yeah uh but i didn't say anything to her for that very reason you didn't know if you could if the only thing i'd

ever seen her in was animal kingdom i've been hey you're awesome yeah but instead i was just like why even start talking to someone that i might say something negative to yeah do you talk to the people you don't know for long times or would could you just would it be okay if you just said hey you were great you were great and i really enjoyed you in one movie could you just and then that's what i would have done just touch someone someone's face? I always touch people inappropriately Immediately Especially if I don't know them Or if I'm nervous

I'll be like hey And immediately touch them And then it freaks them out People must be starting to touch you now I haven't had too many fingers on it yet About how many? She gave me a wink. I like that.

Hello. We'll check it out later. Would you say it's in the high teens? No. No, it's a single digit? Single digit. You got a lot of pokers? You got a lot of people just poking it?

Are people like, let me get my fingers on that baby? I need to get my fingers on that belly. I need to get my fingers on that belly. I got to get my fingers on that baby. Jessica Sinclair will put her full palm on it. Name drop. And push it full back to my spine. To your spine? Do you think she's damaging this?

Do you think she's trying to do what? Yeah, what's she doing? I bet she's jealous. She's jealous of the baby, too. It's firm. She heard if it's a boy and you do that, it makes the dick bigger. That's true. It makes the penis larger.

It like blows it out or something? It shifts the matter down. Do you think if you're having a... This conversation cannot be good for the child. Do you think if you're having a boy it has a big dick? It's heavier in the womb. I'm having a girl and it does have a big dick. Whoa.

Boy, you should look into that. Yeah. We need to pick name tags, you guys. Okay. Yeah, go out there. Find one that you like. All right. The pickings look kind of...

Well, that's a big one over there. What does it say? Can I say that I have a web series called RVC? Sure. Okay. Well, you heard it. It's on rides.tv. Oh, okay. I asked you to do it. Remember you said no way.

I did? Yeah, you said, fuck you, TJ, forever. And you actually threw a lit cigar in my face that you weren't even smoking. I stood there and watched you light it as you threw it and then you threw it at me. That's unbelievable. Yeah, I don't smoke cigars. I just light

them on fire and throw them at people. Jason's having a debate about a name tag and TJ can't find a name on his either. It's Christopher Cross. You didn't even put it on here? Oh, the name tag part fell off. I got a record too, Jason.

This means we're true record friends. Loan me $5,000. Somehow that's what it is. I totally didn't notice you get that record. Is that what everybody does? Like, oh, fuck, I forgot a name tag. I'll just go to Counterpoint and buy a record. This one's my favorite movie.

The soundtrack to my favorite film The Sting The Sting is your all time favorite? all time favorite across the board if you put the score and the story and the acting writing everything I think it's the best movie ever made so who are you playing for then who is The Sting Tim

Tim The Sting Joplin they used to call him in college. I can't imagine that's true. He could fuck standing up. They did that thing to him in the womb where they pressed him against the spine of his mother. Guys, I'm sorry I'm here. I'm so jealous.

It's like we have a callback machine on stage tonight. Jason? Doug! Yes? Just wake me up every once in a while. In response to you asking me to get a name tag, I went out in the audience and I found this Christopher Cross

record produced by Michael O. Martian, a Free Flow production. Are you going to read all the liner notes? There's about 300. The tracks are Say You'll Be Mine, I Really Don't Know Anymore, Spinning, Never Be the Same, Poor Shirley,

Poor Shirley, which was the prequel to Curly Sue, Ride, Ride Like the Wind, The Light Is On, Sailing, Yes, Ride Like the Wind and Sailing were both big hits. And my favorite title, Minstrel Gigolo.

What is that about? Real title. That's what he puts on Blackface. That's actually about sailing. Okay, ooh, we got lyrics. I got great news, everybody. Oh, yeah, what are the lyrics to Minstrel Gigolo? I got great news for Minstrel Gigolo.

Drums. You're the Minstrel Gigolo, don't you know? You sing your songs of love so soft and low, and they want you more and more. All the young and lonely girls wait for you. They are by the backstage door. It's weird when it doesn't have any melody. And they're hoping to be the one.

And when you start to sing, you will be there everything. And when you start to sing, every woman will open up her heart and let you in. They don't even say minstrel or gigolo. Yes, they did. The first fucking line is,'t even say minstrel or gigolo. But yes they did. The first fucking line is you're the minstrel gigolo. I was sleeping next to Doug. As my good friend Lennon here says, listen.

I haven't seen so much. Those lyrics are like wishful thinking. That's like a guy that's like It's not wishful thinking. It's the power of suggestion. I'm a gigolo. He's basically like, come meet me by the back door. I'm Christopher Cross. I'm lonely. He did look like a lion. Because poor Shirley left me and I declare this

planet in the name of me. Lennon? Yo. Who are you playing for? Todd. Todd. It's just a bag with a sharp I think it's got a s'mores cupcake inside of it. Yeah.

I can tell there's... Can I... Chris? I wonder if there's drugs in there. Do you have an... What's it? A shit head? That's what it is, right?

What? Isn't it a shit head? Tim didn't even put his name on it. Oh, yeah. He'll have to... It's a shit head, yeah. He'll have to come tell me one at the end. I think there's one on the back of the bag, but the other two... Yeah, that's why I was asking. Tim will, too. So if you lose, then he'll have to... It's shithead, yeah. Is he trying to be shithead or no? He'll have to come tell me one at the end. I think there's one on the back of the bag,

but the other two... Yeah, that's why I was asking. Tim will, too. So if you lose, then he'll have to come over here. I didn't read it out loud. He'll jot it down. Guys, I want you to...

That's very conscientious of you. Can everybody just go home and just listen to some Christopher Cross tonight? Because honestly, he's got such... Is it true that your daughter was conceived during the playing of this record? That's right. That's right.

During Ride Like the Wind. But all the tracks sound like Jason's just saying them there's no music. It's just like riding across the wind apart. It's the opposite of a karaoke album that just has the track and no lyrics. It's just me with no music

reciting lyrics like bad poetry. Because I've got no nowhere to go sailing it's not far down to paradise at least it's not

for me and if the wind is right you can sail away and find tranquility the canvas can do miracles

just you wait and see believe me it's not it's not far down she's your pregnant lyricals. Just you wait and see. Believe me. It's not She's your pregnant dancer. She's your dancer for money. I like it better than

his real music. I agree by the way. I do. Let's put this out as a record. Are you financing records? Yeah, that's what I've been doing. Jason Mantzoukas reads Christopher Cross. It's a new podcast. Seriously, I feel like people would download that. It costs $12.99 an episode.

If I just every week read a new Christopher Cross song, people would, I feel like people would, that's all it is. The entire length of it takes me to read one is the length of the podcast it's like 15 seconds yeah each podcast

costs a hundred dollars good idea monetize it immediately right cause it's that I'm gonna fucking do this it's that great it's sort of a

you know it's a status thing if you have the whole thing yup if you're a completist yeah it's like Armani Exchange exactly how is it our money exchange you just walk in there and give them some stuff and they give you new stuff yeah i mean

buffalo exchange is that what you mean no armani exchange yeah you're paying for the status of wearing the thing that says armani so the money is for the status of wearing the thing that says Armani. So the money is for the status, not for the actual product. Wow. I mean, I didn't want to say that. Did we all fall asleep just then? I didn't want to say it. Are we in a dream scenario? I was like, I'd rather be awake right now.

Doug, I also saw the best movie of the year, Searching for Sugar Man. It's a terrific documentary. Oh, my husband downloaded that album. Oh, it's good. It's good. Yeah. The music is terrific. I downloaded Jason reciting the lyrics to that album.

Sugar Man. Where are you, Sugar Man? Where are you going, Sugar Man? Yeah, he became huge somewhere after south africa yeah after kind of being and it's just like a construction worker in detroit yeah and and but now he's he's big enough there that i assume that that's part of the fun of the movie is that he can yeah everybody thinks he's probably make a living entertaining them down there makes two records in like the late 60s early 70s everybody thinks he's dead he becomes like like the Elvis of South Africa. They think he's as huge as

Elvis. He's like a construction worker in Detroit. They find out he's not dead. He's alive. Spoiler alert. And then he plays to stadiums full of people and his mind employs. That's like that homeless guy that had that radio voice in Detroit on the side of the road and then he got a job

for one day. Yeah, it's exact that was ryan's story yep it's the exact same story it's the same guy that was detroit too i think no columbus thank you for correcting me columbus all right okay lennon will go first um you get to pick a category Okay, Lennon will go first. You get to pick a category. And then we'll go to Jason and then to TJ, who TJ's already... Gives me panic attacks.

He's already having a panic attack. That night I think about it. Thank God we have some natural calm. Oh, thank you. Put some of that in your water, and I think you'll be good to go. Raspberry lemon flavor. Yeah.

That's actually good because I've been just grinding raspberries and lemons into my melatonin drink. I mean, I think you're going to love this. Balances out your calcium that drink does.

You know what? I said it at the beginning. Thank God, because my calcium is crazy out of whack. You know, that there balances out the calcium. My calcium, that there balances out the calcium.

I'm just growing extra bone in places. I have horns. Lennon, would you like at diarrhea volcano suggested Oh, I thought that was a topic. No. Movies with a diarrhea volcano. No. Suggested

Wreck-It Rafe. And that's movies where Rafe Fiennes has sex. So you can narrow it down. It's not the Harry Potter films. That guy's funnier than his username suggests. Celebrating a birthday today is Jeff Bridges. So the films of Jeff Bridges. Or at Martin Urbano suggested Baby It's

Cold Outside. And that, of course, is movies where someone freezes to death. I'm going to go with Wreck It, Rafe. Alright. Wow. Rafe wrecked it in this movie. Leonard Maltin gives it three and a half stars.

It's from 1996, and Leonard calls it mesmerizing. And he also says that it's an exceptional achievement all around. And he lists nine names, nine names total. How many names do you think you can guess it in? LP? Two. All right, so we go to Jason. Nine names total. How many names do you think you can guess it in? L, P. Two. All right, so we go to Jason. She only thinks she needs two.

Jason only thinks he needs one name. What are you going to do with that, TJ? Jesus. Oh, my fucking God. Hooray. Oh, my God. Oh Ray. Oh my God Ray. What are you going to do? I'm going to say name that movie.

Alright, so I give you one name. Yeah. And then you're going to confidently name it. Your one name is Kevin Whaley. No doy. Oh shit. No doy.

And the movie is called? The English Patient? That's right! Yay! Did you know it, too? Lennon knew it, too. Some aggressive play right out of the gate there. Boom!

We'll start with Lennon again, but this time we'll go to TJ to switch the order around. Lennon gets to choose, though, between at Wendy D, D-E-E 8. Wendy D 8 suggested me, me, me, me, me. And that's... Is that a certain kind of italics?

Movies. See, put little notes on either end. That's movies that have the word me in the title. At Wiggly Wigs suggested Molar Express. And that's movies

that have dentists in them. And the King of Pancakes category, the number one movie ten years ago to this very date. Number one movie ten years ago. this very date. Number one movie ten years ago. Movies with me in the title or dentist

movies? Molar Express. Movies with dentists. Would you like a dentist movie from 1976, 1986, or 2008? 86.

All right. Two and a half stars from Leonard. He calls this movie very entertaining. He also says it has super duper special effects. Uh-oh. And, uh... and I'm going to pass out breathe

you gotta breathe that's enough what did I say very entertaining and super duper special effects and he lists nine names and has something some sort of dentistry in in there

somewhere how many names you think you can get it in out of nine nine it's a strong opening tj i'd say name that movie what right you can't do it in less than nine? Why not? Does it say somewhere in the constitution of this game that I can't, Jason? Well, it says you're not playing against, you know, a rock or Pete Holmes.

You're playing against a person that's thinking for two right now. Have you started a feud with Pete Holmes? By the way, if there's a podcast feud between you and Pete Holmes, I am in. No, we had fun. We had a good time on that show. That was a real train wreck.

That's what I smoked before. A little train wreck. You really want to say her name? Have all the names. The entire cast. Let me hear the description again. Is that what really want to say her name? Have all the names. The entire cast. Let me hear the description again. Is that what you want to do? Very entertaining.

Yeah. And super duper special effects. And dentists. Dentist. What year? Dentai. 86, guys. I can do it in eight names.

All right, all right. That was a close one. Jason? I can do it in three names. Let's see. Came to play. Came to play. Now it's my turn?

Mm-hmm. You don't know it. Gotta go less than three. You stinker. He does. He has good bluffing eyebrows, though. They really. Look at him.

Name that movie. Ooh. All right. Is she allowed to do that? Do you really want your three names? Or my three names? Do you think my three names are going to matter? Sure.

All right. Sure. Your three names are Levi Stubbs. Yep. Yep. Bill Murray. Okay. And Christopher Guest.

Okay. What's it called? I'm not positive, but I'm going to go with Little Shop of Horrors. That's correct. I win a gun now. You win. I win a gun. Can I guess? Jason's our winner. That was amazing. I would have gotten that. You did. I would have gotten that. Can I guess?

Jason's our winner. That was amazing. Can I guess? Nicely done. Special effects. It's only because I got thrown. There was just a

Frank Oz was just on something talking about the special effects and how they spent over a million dollars on the ending of that movie and it's just the giant plants, blah, blah, blah. And in the end of the movie everybody dies and so they were like

oh no you can't end the movie this way so they had to reshoot a whole new ending and throw away like this multi-million dollar ending that they had. Great story he told it better but so the special effects that's why the special effects I was like oh I bet it's a little shop of horrors that's good. I thought that's what the movie was

but then special effects threw me because I was like, oh, I bet it's Little Shop of Horrors. That's good. I thought that's what the movie was, but then special effects threw me because I was like, there's just a puppet. Was the 1976 movie Marathon Man? What? Yeah, I'm sure it was probably in there. That's a good dentist movie. That's a good dentist movie. For sure.

For sure. All right. So Jason won, and Todd wrote a shithead on the back of his that's very complicated. And where's Tim, the sting guy? If you can come over here and write down a shithead for me to say at the end of the show. Come on over, Tim.

I'm sorry. Yeah, there you go, dude. Just write it down. I'm sorry for what happened, Tim. You don't have to deface your album. Tim seems cool. Oh, okay. All right. Whoa. Oh, boy. happen to you know you don't have to deface your seems cool oh okay all right oh wow damn jesus you throw a fucking really you have to be hostile behavior did you come pick this up i can't believe you smell of shit all over the floor

whatever like uh it's pretty simple oh wait Tim oh wait a second I am Tim he really did come back now I feel like an asshole get out of here Tim Jesus Christ good job Tim alright and where's Christopher

yeah where's Christopher at you turned this into a little op shop of horrors come get your prizes Christopher got a bag full of stuff there's more copies of TJ's

Extended EP than anyone In the world will ever own Don't forget his column And your natural column And there's a brochure I'll kind of tell you a little more about the product And what it can offer to your life Enjoy it

Thank you Thanks for being with us Does he get a shithead or no? No, your guy won the prizes, so. Oh, I see. Why would he get a consolation prize? I didn't realize it was in either one. Yeah, it is.

The shithead thing is pretty good. It's in the Constitution. Some people would rather win that than the bag of stuff. Both of these gentlemen have on great cardigans that are sort of half sweatshirt, half, and women like those, so good job. Good job. Yeah, and women like those, so good job. Good job. Yeah, and yours had buttons on the shoulders. Epaulettes. That's what those are called? Yeah.

What are they called? Epaulettes. Epaulettes? You're going to give me a seizure. I'm having an epaulette seizure. Are we really watching you learn right now? Epaulettes? With all the joy and wonder of a naive toddler.

Have you just gone through life calling them shoulder buttons? I've been calling them shoulder straps for the tip-taps. I say it every time. Well, for somebody who doesn't like a lot of syllables and stuff, that's a lot longer than epilence.

Yeah. But I can sing it so I can remember. Do you want to just come with me and I can pretend that you're my child for a while and I can practice?

You can practice. Most of you can learn. But your child's going to be a daughter. That's right. A female woman child. But with a penis so I think it works out.

So I'll wear a wig. I have a lot of different types of wigs. Great. So do I. I have a whole closet full of wigs. Well, we'll get together. We'll look at some wigs. do I, I have a whole closet full of wigs we'll get together, we'll look at some wigs

we'll figure out what works for you guys, I smell a podcast $150 I think you're smelling this one right now I'm smelling this podcast this podcast is called Screw You Pete Holmes take or leave it you made it weird Pete

you made it weird right now Pete's like I can't believe they're talking about me so much on this podcast take or leave it. You made it weird, Pete. You made it weird. Right now, Pete's like, I can't believe they're talking about me so much on this podcast. Yeah, but he's jacking off so furiously. And look, he had a picture of himself just a couple of minutes ago. You guys have all been on his show, right?

Yes, we all have been. We all made it weird, yeah. Cool, cool. Doug sounds ecstatic. Yeah, we've all made it weird, yeah. I don't know how weird ecstatic. Yeah, we've all made it weird, yeah. I don't know how weird I made it. I don't know. He didn't get much out of me.

I taught Pete Holmes Improv 101. You did? Mm-hmm. Really? Where? Here? In New York. Ah.

Mm-hmm. Was he funny? Yeah. He used to be an improviser before he was a stand-up. Yeah. He's always been funny. Yeah. Sorry, I got...

Probably not good in scenes, though, with partners. So much. We were working on it. That was a troubleshooting area for him. We were really working on his physicality because he's very stiff.

He gets in his head about his physicality, so I had to get up and work it out. Yeah, yeah. Once you've seen his impressions, then you go, oh, we should just listen to those impressions. It's just the voice that he does when he does people. Yeah, so he's perfect

for podcasting. He's a funny guy. No, I'm just friends with him. I started off doing comedy with him. Oh, God, I hope this isn't one of those things where he dies tonight. No, no, I've tonight. And then this gets out there before I can stop it. I paid someone to kill him tonight. This is sort of my

segue into talking about him in a memorandum. Where can people pay to see you, T.J. Miller? In memorandum? It's a short memo. You didn't get it, obviously. Oh, in memorandum. I will remember you

I was with you that night you got arrested and you kept insisting on getting your memorandum rights so what do you got to plug yes for free you can go to rides.tv backslash rvc and see a new online

series that if you put in your phone number, if you want to, or connect it to your Facebook or anything. That sounds very complicated. No, it's pretty fun. It's about the second lowest rated home shopping network. What is it? Rides.tv. Yeah.

It's like a new kind of technology. Cool. Come and check it out. I will. R-I-D-E-S. Dot TV. Backslash R-T-R. R-I-D-E-S dot TV. Backslash R-T-R. R-V-C. Oh, R-V-C like

Q-V-C. Yeah. But one letter lower. Mm-hmm. As I look at all of those letters and statuses. Right. So is A and X being at the very top? There's nobody in the world that knows exactly where to go after that plug. There is nobody in the world that knows exactly where to go after that plug.

There is no listener that got a pen. You know what? There's nobody. There's definitely nobody who is like, oh, that's right. When I listened to that podcast

a couple of days ago, I wanted to look up TJ's thing. Oh, it's rides.tv backslash rps. Just Google biggest jackass in the history of anything.

And then it'll come up. And Pete Holmes' podcast will come up. Yeah! Yeah! Water on the stage. Yeah! My God, Tim, look at the catastrophe that you've allowed. I will drink your milkshake.

I love that we're just... Wait, did you just do Bane? No, it was my terrible Daniel Plainview. It was my impression of Pete Holmes. Yes. I was waiting for him to order a milkshake the whole movie. I drink your milkshake. God, fuck him.

Which one? Daniel Plainview. Okay. He's an annoying fictional character. Jason, what do you got going on how did this get made how did this get made as a podcast I do

the league on FX Thursdays at sometime 10 I believe sometime of wonderful sometime of evening sometime of wonderful yes it is nailed it I bet you can sing that

say the words of the song you got it all wrong No. Nailed it. I bet you can sing that, baby. Let him say the words of the song. You got it all wrong, Jason. Oh, and you can follow me on Twitter. Oh, wait, I'm not on Twitter. You're not on Twitter. Fuck you, Twitter. You can follow.

There's a Tumblr that some guy did just for the outfit that Jason wears, the same outfit every day, and he just puts pictures of him wearing the same outfit. That's true. That's true. It's true. It's called Jason Manzuka's style or something like that. It's awesome.

It's called the way it is. I didn't explain it very well. If you go to rides.tv backslash style. What's your plug? When's your current project going to wrap up? Jess and I are writing something new. Oh, cool. But you can watch

the old thing that we did that got canceled on Hulu over and over again. Best Friends Revs. That's right. Really funny show. And that's it. Twitter is me, just Lennon Parham, but I'm bad at it. So follow me.

I'll be in Austin, Miami, Fort Lauderdale, Los Angeles, Irvine, California, Orlando, Florida, Jacksonville. Deets and dates at DouglasMovies.com. One more time for all of my guests, TJ Miller, Jason Madzoukas, and Lennon Parham. Thank you. Fun, fun show. We'll see you guys next week and next year. And as always,

Colin O. Gorman and Cal State Colleges are a shithead. don't go anywhere I'm going to take a picture of you guys as soon as I say this killer ending and the sting part two is a shithead it is

now it's time for them to watch another talky Part 2 is a shithead. Whoa! It is! Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you, cause Doug loves movies.