Doug Loves Movies - Todd Glass, Ross Marquand, Geoff Tate and Griffin Newman guest

Episode Date: February 27, 2019

Live from the UCB Franklin Theatre, Doug welcomes Todd Glass, Ross Marquand, Geoff Tate and Griffin Newman to the show.You can find the entire archive of Doug Loves Movies on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to stitcherpremium.com and use promo code "DOUG."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey everybody, a few days ago we lost a hilarious comedian and good friend. So this episode is dedicated to the great Brody Stevens. As he would say, ENJOY IT! Maybe sticky seats with 50 acid popcorn kernels in his teeth. There's still not one that he won't see. Because Doug loves movies. Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves

Movies. Coming to you once again from the UCB Theater in Los Angeles! We did it, LA! We're here. It's Tuesday, February 26, 2019, and what

is the name tag situation? Oh, it 26, 2019. And what is the name tag situation? Oh, it's looking good. We've got a few. We've got this gentleman having a seat. Doesn't have a name tag. Has a beverage, though. What are you drinking? Water.

I love it. So good. So good for you. What is this stuffed animal here? What's going on there? It. I love it. So good. So good for you. What is this stuffed animal here? What's going on there? It's a porg. And it says I heart TC 14.

What does that mean? It's for Griffin. Oh, someone knows who one of the guests is tonight. Aren't you fancy? I'm not going to talk to you anymore. Dan is with wolves. And then a shrug. I like it, Dan.

What's that real jerky right there on there? Let me see that. Does it come right off? Oh, perfect I would love some chef's cut Real jerky Tired of eating all this fake jerky I want to get into the real shit And I'm sorry if your name tag doesn't get chosen

Because it doesn't have this amazing Amazing bribe on it. Oh my god, this looks this looks so good. Look at that shit. It's just like a piece of bacon. Oh! Tastes like a piece of bacon.

Oh my. It is bacon jerky. Thank you. Thank you for clarifying. All right, I'm going to hang on to it right here, but I'll tell the guests if they pick your name tag, they get some of this.

I'm not going to say shit. This is my little secret. It's so good. Thanks to everybody for making name tags. Good luck. Doug Plugs.

This Thursday, February 28th, I'm doing stand-up at the Improv in Tampa, Florida. Bring your name tags if you want to get up on stage and see how hard it is to play Last Man Standing. The next day, I set sail on the 311 cruise, followed by the Trailer Park Boys cruise. Yeah, I'm doing two cruises back to back. I think there's still room on the Trailer Park Boys, but the 311 is packed, sold out. If you're in LA on Tuesday, March 5th, go to the first annual

Brody Stevens Festival of Friendship at the Comedy Store. A benefit for Brody's family and for mental health awareness. And of course he was on Douglas' movies several times and

you know, we miss him already. I've got lots of shows coming up in Indianapolis, Nashville, Boston, and more. For all the deets, go to DougLovesMovies.com. That's DougLovesMovies.com. Yeah! Go, go, go! From the corrections department,

Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 is the full title of the Paul Blart Mall Cop sequel. Apologies to any mall cops who may have been offended. Prize bag tonight. Not only does it have the rest of this piece of bacon that I can't finish

because it's so delicious. Also in the bag, I was just in New York, so you get a copy of In New York Magazine. I'm going to talk about this later when I get the guests out here. I got a wallet caddy, which is a great device to hide joints in. It looks like a

stack of credit cards, but it's got your joints in it. And you put it in your wallet. I got a sippy cup from a show that I saw in New York City. I believe this one was from when I saw True West with

Paul Dano and Ethan Hawke. It was very good. A Douglas Movies t-shirt is in the bag. A Douglas Movies sticker. And all the stuff brought by my guests tonight for a very funny gentleman. Because we've got to keep the patriarchy going. No ladies tonight. Please give it up for Griffin Newman, Ross Marquand,

Todd Glass, and Jeff Tate. Thank you. There they are. Look at them working out where they're going to sit. Let's meet them individually. Starting with... Ross Marquand is here, everybody. Thank you. Starting with Ross Marquand is here, everybody. Recent guest on Dining with D&K.

Check that episode out if you like people doing impressions while they're eating. I don't. We had a lovely time out at, what restaurant was that? It was Hyperion Tavern. Yeah. Yeah. Out in Studio Cizow. Yeah.

And it was a really good time. And, of course, you're Aaron on Walking Dead, Red Skull in Avengers Infinity War, and Paul Newman on Mad Men. Yeah. Yep. Yeah. Ross Marquand. War and Paul Newman on Mad Men. Yeah. Ross Marquand, what can't you do? I'm spitting bacon bits everywhere because I still... Oh my God, dude. Look at this. Real jerky, bacon jerky. Have a

piece. It's fucking delicious. It's so good. This is the crossover event I've been looking for. My food show and my movie show are crossing over. I mean, the weed show is kind of in the mix, too, because a few of us are very high.

But, yeah. Just, yeah. Give it a try, Todd. Use your microphone voice if you have something to say. I know. I said if you have something to say. I know. I said, I'm going to say, do you want some turkey jerky? And then I told him to slap me. Thought that might be something.

Oh, that would be fun. Do it again. Do it now. No. No, why? Where are you going with that? Like a comedic slap. Just say it.

No. Just trust me. What would I do wrong? A comedic slap What is that? Just like a little gentler Like right there I think it's like

Depends who you are I bet there's some actors That go When we do that bit Fucking slap me That would be fun You just go Oh yeah sure I'll do it

But yeah like I think it would be like this Normal like maybe like Not too soft Not too hard But like Maybe like Like that Alright soft, not too hard, but like, maybe like that. All right, go ahead, Jeff.

Well, no, because either... Flap him like that. We'll do it later. I won't forget. Don't forget. It's more of an after-party kind of thing. Right, that's what I was thinking. I get it.

All right, that's cool, but I might as well introduce you next. Todd Glass, everybody. Known movie trivia expert. So look out, everybody else tonight. Todd could take this thing. Thank you. Yes, you're welcome.

Also, Griffin Newman is here What's your character name in the movie Draft Day? Rick the Intern Rick the Intern Rick the Intern We got some Rick heads in the house I love that credit I love that he's Rick the Intern Draft Day, 21 domestic,

zero overseas. Any fans in the house? Not even released. One of those movies they went, why bother? Why spend the time? You, of course, are a champion from one of the 12 guest shows in New York City.

It's exciting to have you back. Why are you out here in Los Angeles? To do podcasts. You just flew out to podcast. I flew out here with my girlfriend who's here working. Humble brag.

She's retired. So yeah, I'm freeloading in a hotel room and doing podcasts. So thank you for having me on. Yeah, well, thank you for, you know, giving me the heads up that you were here. And I'm very excited to see you

go head-to-head with Todd Glass because he is a fierce competitor. Thank you. I'm a different person person People don't know me There's a new Todd Glass I sanded the edges off For people that were like I like him

But just bring it down a little You're gonna be pleasantly surprised Todd Glass Bringing it down a little I'm looking to break glass tonight That's my fight cry I don't know that wasn't good I'm sorry I apologize

I'm out here doing podcasts Todd Alright well I introduced him last Because all the other guests are just going to be so intimidated By the chanting that follows It's Jeff Tate, everybody. Even Todd Glass is chanting. It's fun to do, Doug.

You should try it sometime. Right, but he's, you know, you're his competitor. Like, he shouldn't be on your side. I think he's bragging a little bit. He knows he's going to win. I mean, look at him with his arms crossed and his mic on the table. He think he's bragging a little bit. He knows he's going to win. I mean, look at him with his arms crossed and his mic on the table. He doesn't give a fuck.

Oh, this... It's funny that we do it at a table. I don't know. There's something about... Normally, I don't have a table. You've done it out on the road at Good Nights in Raleigh. There's something about here at UCB I'm just like, yeah, let's go ahead

and have the table. I like it. I changed my opinion. Oh no, I thought, why do it without a table? I think you misunderstood me. I tricked you. I did the old Todd Glass. See, I fucking know. You see the look on your face and you're like, I thought he wasn't going to the old Todd Glass See I fucking know See the look on your face You're like

I thought he wasn't Going to do that Todd Glass anymore I got you good And you're fucking angry Nothing pisses people off Like the old Todd Glass Alright now Jeff

I seriously need you To have some fun I need you to open up and laugh a little bit because you seem very closed off. It also just feels like you're behind me. It feels like you're not my guest next to me.

That you're like straight up behind me. And now we're back to why is there a table? The table is what created that illusion. Yeah, the table's kind of in a weird spot too today. I was sitting on this side of the table and you were sitting on this side of the table so it seems as if I was behind you

but really you're just sitting wrong at the table. We'll be back with more of table talk. But Jeff, I wanted to mention this wonderful gift that you got me because it's going right into the prize bag. It's a hat that says Weezer, which, you know, I love Weezer,

so I'm totally on board at that point. But then it goes on to say, which, what hat should go on to say anything? The hat should be pretty short to the point, but it continues to tell us, I'm feeling Pinkerton-ish. Yeah, it's been on my head. I wore it on my weed show today, but I do not want to own a hat that says I'm feeling

Pinkerton-ish, even though I generally am feeling Pinkerton-ish because it is my favorite Weezer album, but I also enjoy a lot of other stuff that they've done and I'm not one of those Weezer fans that just dwells on that second album. It's just one of a set, Doug.

Jeff is trying to tell me there's more hats for each album. There's one for each album. Weezer, I'm feeling blue. Ish. Weezer, I'm feeling like teal. That's our latest.

Teal elbow. I'm going to sneeze. You guys hang on for a second. I'll make a sound and cover it up for you. Oh second oh I like that I like that a lot but the sneeze went away as soon as you said Susie said you'd make a sound that covers it up use your microphone why do you put your microphone down cuz I'm trying to hang on to it my father died from putting his microphone down do you when you're doing stand-up, are you like,

hey, isn't it weird when you use somebody else's shampoo? You're like... Oh, yeah. That used to be one of my jokes. And also, soap, isn't that crazy? Do you do your stand-up that way? No, but it's weird. That joke's embarrassing at this point, right?

I love that joke. I love any joke that has a human mouth fart sound. Raspberry. It's called a raspberry. You make a raspberry noise. If I said I like any joke that has a raspberry in it, I would lose millennials. They would turn off the podcast immediately.

They'd be like, what do you mean the sound of a raspberry? It's a fruit that I have sometimes with my poke. You do this. This is a fun show. I don't care who disagrees. Listen. Except for millennials, it sounds like. Millennials are not into podcasts.

They're skipping that. They're too fast. They like real fast ones. They're like fidget spinners and fast podcasts. Well, they would love the quick impressions. The short macro micro. Oh, I'll do impersonation. Micro impressions.

Do you have a good micro impression? Like, because Ross Marquand is the king on the internet of doing quick impressions of people. Just name somebody. Name a famous actor and Ross will just do a quick impression. That's not how it works. Oh, sure. Come on, Todd. Name somebody. Ray Romano. Ray Romano.

Here we go. Hey! Hey! Deborah! Deborah! Deborah! Deborah! Deborah! Deborah! I'm in my 60s! Deborah! You're good? How about Bernie Sanders?

Hey! 1%! 2%! Wait, are we doing Christopher Lloyd? Or, uh... Marty! Marty! I'm going back to the future! Marty, I'm in taxi!

Listen, we gotta go back. Gigawatts! Ah, Frankie, whatever that guy's name was. He sounded like Crusty the Clown. This is some great pot! Wow! That's what I wish he said, said a great Scott. What are you guys talking about?

Oh, dude, look at this. I thought about something. I never did ventriloquism. Now, I'm not saying it's great, but about a week ago, I just did it as a joke, and I went, I swear to God, this isn't fucking horrible, and they fucking practice all the time, so it's not that hard. It is weird. I'm doing the right job.

I'm doing the right job. Every ventriloquist looks like their dummy is saying stuff that's making them uncomfortable. They're just like a fake smile the whole time. Okay, go ahead and say that. I don't like minorities. Okay, my puppet's crazy. Honestique. Wow.

I got it. All right. Well, that being said, I do a thing on this show, Todd, now called First Impressions, where we just do impressions of people. I like it. But I would like tonight, as a tribute to our late friend, I think we should all do Brody Stevens impressions. Leather interior.

See? Exactly. Leather interior. See, exactly. Leather exterior. I usually botch some of his jokes because, but I get them out enough, but the one that I always you're just jealous because I can take my mother to lunch and pay for half of it.

Yeah, that was a classic. He was, yeah, he had the, it wasn't even, humble brag's not the word for it. It was bragging about nothing. It was bragging, he was bragging about being in Tarzana. I did a show in Resedia. Resedia? Yes, whatever it is.

I was close enough. Brody was very specific, though. He was like, anybody said they were from somewhere, he would say back the name of where they were from and then the specific thing about it. I opened for a guy in Las Vegas that did that. He knew all the area codes. He had just memorized all the area codes

and everybody was like, oh, no way. Jake in town, 215. 215, 612, and you're like, what? One of those is right.

That's why he was headlining. He put the work in. Hey, who's the scamp? Why's this guy trying to take me there? I think, you know, there's a new blue hat in town, Jeff. There's a new hat in town and it's looking good. How are you guys doing this? How are we doing that?

Is this a real song? Yeah, it's a theme song from Alice. There's a new sitcom. How are we doing that? Is this a real song? Yeah, it's the theme song from Alice. There's a new sitcom. How did Todd know that? What do you mean, how did he know that? Todd doesn't know anything. Well, that's true. Wow, you're right. I knew that. That's pretty good.

If only that was the answer to one of the questions tonight. There's a new girl in town. I knew shows growing up everyone knows that show you can't be yeah linda lavins sang her own theme song she played alice she sang the song about how she's a new girl in town she's looking good shut up you dinghy she's really full of herself was that mel that was mel or was that uh flo no flo would go kiss my grits yeah see these are great impressions ross why aren't you joining in sorry on on these amazing impressions that we're doing i was just straightening up my knee i

uh i tore tore a muscle in my uh knee this weekend whose voice are you doing right now this is is this just you i tore a muscle in my knee what if christopher walker yeah oh my muscle oh wow wow here's the thing i was on a cruise ship and cruise ships are very wavy they rock back and forth the strangest thing you've ever felt or seen with your eyes. Anyway, I was doing the Watusi as you do. And I pirouetted at a time when I shouldn't have. And there it goes, that's the rest of the story i love it thank you that's amazing is that what you do on the walking dead

it's not the walking dead jeff it's the walking dead oh oh Oh! I mean, it'd be cool. You could do like a Rick voice and be like, I'm over here. What the fuck? He's right over... I heard him. Did you see anything, Ross?

I didn't see anything coming from my way. Do Christopher Walken looking for Carl. Hey, where's Carl? I want to say something that I don't have to say. These chefs' cuts at Real Jerky are amazing. I'm eating the applewood right now, and it's amazing. I really love this. That's really tasty. Good job putting those on your

name tag, Dan. You're not under oath, man. How many times do you have to say stuff? I want to give him a... Excuse me? I don't know. But the way you said it is so funny. Excuse me?

Excuse me? Excuse me? I'm going to say something I don't have to say. Excuse me? The emergency exits are around your back. Excuse me? Sir, please get out of the way. You can't stop me from walking down the hallway at the hotel. Excuse me? It's like a security guard and I don't want to listen to him. And if it was a cop, I would.

I'm not going to fuck around with a security guard. Excuse me? I go, sir, please, come on. You're not a real... Let me just walk. Excuse me? He just wanted my respect. That's what the bit became. Because I had to go, yes had to go yes officer he's like okay you got to keep quiet

and then he let me down the hall that's just me and he was gonna say that i go he's gonna win he goes that's just me i go sir please stop i'm it wasn't me i'm in my bare feet i'm a full-grown adult i just went to get a pizza he goes that's just go, what officer? Just to like make him happy. I would love this story if I, if the bacon jerky wasn't so far away from me. You know, I like

to eat when I get, when I see some dinner theater. Right? That story could have used a snack. But it's a good... Excuse me. I think it might have not been right, actually, to tell that story.

Well, it's out there. You're fucked. What do you mean? Wow, and this is only 120 calories per serving. What? And serving per container is 17. Shut up. Where did you get it?

Where'd you get it? Is there any more? Across the street at Gelson's. Oh, wow. Is there any more? He wants to know if you have another bag of jerky we could eat. Pick Dan's name tag if you really love it, because he's the one who brought it. I will. Do you have more?

No, he doesn't have more. He brought this as a name tag and you took it? Yeah, because look at that stuff. It looks delicious, and I was right. No, I mean, you made a good choice, but why would I pick Dan now? I don't get bacon out of it. Do you want bacon? Yeah, I'd love bacon.

People love bacon. Lick the bag. Have some more. Lick the bag. People love bacon. It is true. I have a reason to believe it has

a lot of success to do with Kevin Bacon. I took that joke from Jim Gaffigan. I don't give a shit. What's he gonna do? What's he gonna do? Fight me for it?

No, I think he'll be alright with it because it didn't work for you. So he's not going to have an issue. Jeff, what did you bring for the prize bag tonight?

I brought... It's in your pocket. I love it. I love a simple prize bag contribution. My last year's album. People are where people make them. Oh, look at that. When I saw Lego Movie 2

and I bought my tickets on Fandango. I got free... They give you a free little bag of Legos. I got a free little bag of Legos. And now I'm passing it on to you guys. Here, you step on this. Todd, what do you got for the prize bag? Use your microphone.

I got a Tic Tac. I mean, an Altoid. Oh, okay, one Altoid. That joke was worth it. I try to get something that somebody will go home and be like, cool, you know? All I can tell you is I would have got vanilla ice cream. I have two other things. But get vanilla ice cream can tell you is I would have got vanilla ice cream. I have two other things. But get vanilla ice cream on the way home.

And put this vanilla ice cream. Put the ice cream in the microwave for like ten seconds. Wait, what is happening? You got a recipe for cinnamon toast crunch and ice cream? They can just eat it out of the box. It's pretty fucking good too. That's what I was going to do. I'm just saying. Oh, you are going to open it? Yeah.

Can I tell you though, you're going to wish you opened this. I already ate a lot of stuff that was in it. I had so much stuff. I slowly kept eating it. I ate the Reese's Cups. These are Keebler's, but they're the version of those. What are they from the Girl Scouts? Samoans.

Samoans. They're the not helpful kind. Coconut Dreams. They're the kind that didn't help anybody do anything. No one learned how to camp. And these are, so whoever gets it, you know who they are. So outside, they could sell them if they want, or you can keep them. But I gave you like 10 of these.

I left, I talked about this last time. I left the messages for 10 years to Blake Wexler. He was a newer comedian then, and he saved them for 10 years. So we put out a CD. It's 12 years of voice messages from Todd Glass to Michael Exler there they are so maybe if you want one on the way out of here you just buy it from the person who wins it fuck make him five bucks that's fair or you can go download it for free it's like a dumb guy who could realize as he's hurting himself it was a

character we were this just cuz I don't put on a mustache doesn't mean it's not a character. You just sort of mold into it and you mold out of it. People forget that sometimes. They're like, why is he saying that? It was a character. That's classic Hollywood.

That's like an age-old Hollywood. Just because there's not a mustache doesn't mean he's not a character. That's like the first thing you learn. Oh, can I? Oh. Do you want one of these first? No, it's not bad to take one.

There are other people. Oh, it isn't? Yeah, they'll get slightly less, but they're still getting some. I'll be real clean in the way that I take it. Not me. All right, what do you have, Griffin? Well, so I have mistakenly about a month ago given you the wrong phone number.

So you spent a better part of today texting with someone who was not me. I was texting with somebody who was like, what do you mean, prize bag? Right. So then when you finally DM'd me, you said, why are you dissing me over texts?

And it took a couple hours to decipher that, and then I finally corrected the number, and then you said, don't forget the prize bag, and then I immediately left my hotel room, ran to Amoeba Records, and power walked here. So I got the one and only season of the Patrick Warburton Tick Show.

And the only two seasons out of three of the Fox Kids Tick Cartoon Show. Three shows that I am not on, but I am on season one and season two of Amazon's The Tick, which comes back April 5th. I'm announcing that for the first time ever

because they're officially announcing it tomorrow. It's an exclusive. So fuck their embargo. April 5th. Yeah, and this is going to come out tomorrow, so it's probably

going to be perfectly timed. Yeah, it's going to be fine. Yeah. That's roughly 45 good episodes of television there. A lot of love in that bag. A lot of love in that bag. I do an impersonation of Patrick Warburton.

Oh, okay. In the show... What's the show? The Sicko. The Tick? He was on with David Spade. Yeah, yeah. Rules of Engagement. Rules of Engagement. That's not really that good, but just be nice. May pretend I'm like your kid at a school.

Don't be mean-spirited. So we have to like it and we have to put it up on the refrigerator? It wouldn't hurt. It's so quick. But anything. I don't want to go to a wedding. Yeah, I mean, squinting really isn't enough.

You gotta, the voice has to match more. I forgot, I forgot who he was I have to eat sushi? I don't like sushi. I like meat. It's definitely Clint Eastwood,

I think. Oh, maybe. You know what it is, Clint Eastwood. I'm sorry, it's Clint Eastwood. You like it? You have to very Clint Eastwood. You know what it is, Clint Eastwood? I'm sorry, it's Clint Eastwood. You like it? You have to.

You're the one that fucking said it was him. Can I do a quick micro impression? Yeah, please. This is my, on this track adjacent to this, Cartoon Arthur. I play live action Arthur, but I studied, because when I was auditioning, I was like, do they want me to do the voice?

This is Cartoon Arthur. Micro impression. Ross style. Tick! It'll be funny after you watch the DVDs. Whoever won that will find that a little funny. Yeah, the one winner is going to have a real good time. Just record yourself yucking on your couch. Tick!

Tick! Tick! Tick! It'll be Tick. Tick. It'll be really funny for one of you. See, I love impressions that we can all do. I love it. Teach us another one, Ross. Gosh.

Well, I started doing Jeff Bridges recently. Oh, yeah. Teach us that one. Because I was watching Bad Times at the Royal, and I don't think I really noticed it before, but I think Jeff Bridges kind of unhinges his jaw and moves it over a couple inches when he talks. So he goes,

yeah, yeah, man, you know, I'm really happy to be here, man, you know. Got the whole weed thing going on, which is cool, you know, I'm into that. Yeah, man, I'm into that. Yeah, man.

We're all runners. Runners for each other, man. You know, life is funny like that, you know. Yes. That was like his Golden Globes speech. Was a little incoherent at times.

Dear. Dear. Oh. There's a gentleman in the audience that approves. Finds it really good. Good energy over here. I like that. Everybody's a critic. No, he was nice.

Yeah. Critics are nice when they like stuff. No, Doug. What do you think Todd thinks a critic is? I don't know what a critic is. I don't know. I think he thinks they're hypnotists. No, I was just morphing into it.

You don't like this movie. Oh, I know why he asked. That's you. Two thumbs down. Wait a second That was Humphrey Bogart Here's the part of the show where I say Turn it off Bert

Because I'm about to say Let the games begin That sounded like an old prospector We're going to play some games Hang on to your hats and glasses I hate to interrupt What happened? I didn't do my bag

What? We didn't do my bag Oh that's okay We'll do it later Okay cool Now what'd you bring For the prize bag? I apologize for skipping you

That's okay No it's okay I got wrapped up too That expression I didn't do my bag Was scaring me I don't know what You were talking about.

So I got some lovely coasters with a fleur-de-lis on the front. There's four and they're marble. I think they're faux marble, but they're still marble. I can't believe I almost skipped this. Natural cork back on these guys. I got some. Wow, they're heavy, by the way. That is marble. Yeah, yeah. I know my marbles.

I got three high fidelity earplugs. For any of you that are having trouble sleeping or you just want to block out sound. This is it. Three.

Why three? I got beard wax. Oh. I got half lit, half smoked, half lit San Miguel candle here. Because he defeated the devil. And it'll protect your house. You know, he's got a bag so we can just keep it all in his bag.

Yeah. We don't have to pass them all down here. I have a $20 bill. Yes! Finally! Big pop on that one. And I have a $20 bill. Yes! Finally! Big pop on that one. And I have a sponge. What?

It looks like a triple from the day of. I thought it was a rice cake. This is from the country of Greece. No joke. No joke. From Athens, Greece. Wow. We finally have answered the question, what does a Grecian earn?

One sponge. A sponge. A sponge for your efforts. Throw all that stuff in that bag and pass it on down here. And thank you for bringing all that delicious... Is any of it edible? I'm afraid not.

I don't think so. Nothing in there is delicious. But now, let's go ahead and select the name tags that you're going to be playing for on behalf of... You can do it, Todd. Pick your name tag,

and while you guys do that, we'll go to a brief commercial message. We'll be right back. Are you tired of digging your car out of snow? Well, then fucking move where it's warm. We'll be back. I'm sorry, now we're going to go to a message. We'll be right back.

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Back to the show. We did it. We're back. Yes. So civilized. Such a quiet name tag selection process. Ross, what did you come up with? I picked Joe versus the volcano.

It's a sketch that he just did. I think. Yeah. There's Doug. There's Joe. All right. You're Joe, right? Yeah.

That's the volcano right there. Yeah. All this is the sky. All this is the water. And this suitcase is also from the movie right there. And then he says down here, I gave up at a certain point. But I feel like it's good. I feel like it's a good.

Yeah. Yeah. Great job. Griffin, what do you have? My name tag is Big Feff It's like big fish But the man's name is Jason Feffer Based on a true friendship

And he photoshopped you and I holding a fish Yeah, so you gotta pick that It's a big one Yeah It's a very big one I love it Yeah Great job, Feff You get first billing, too holding a fish. Yeah, so you gotta pick that. It's a big one. Yeah. It's a very big one. I love it. Yeah.

Great job, Feff. You get first billing, too. Deservedly. Oh, you know. Yeah. I'll take it. That's one big fish is the quote from David Sims of the Atlantic.

It's probably just... My dear friend. That's the critic's quote. It's probably just alphabetical, so it's not really... No, no, noical no no no no you have bigger credits than me Captain EO Blade Runner

I'm not in the credits of either of those Todd well I did pick them I'm going to say be honest with you from a creative standpoint try to put some color on it or something I mean right they got you with the Rice Krispie Treats taped to it, but the sign itself

is rather underwhelming. It says, I am Professor Krispie Steven. And there were two Krispie creams taped on either side. One I gave to Jeff today, one I'm eating. So, thank you. When a sign has food on it, it wins. I don't think there were Krispie creams attached.

Oh, no. Rice Krispy Treats. Rice Krispy Treats, sorry. I Am Professor Krispy is a reference to my podcast. So they clearly thought they would win me over, but they were underestimating how much Todd likes

Rice Krispy Treats. I mean, look, it worked out. Everyone won. Everyone. Everyone won. It's a win all the way around. It says something about all of us that everyone got so caught up that I said

Krispy Kreme by accident. You're like, is anyone going to tell him? What if no one said anything? What if we just let it go? Todd Glass, everybody. He's the man of the people This is a new Todd Glass Thank you

I mean the listeners were thinking That there were Krispy Kremes taped I know Trying to paint a picture for everybody Thank you that's what I was saying Somebody should have fucking said something Yeah it's a good thing I did Let's start

With a game Can I did. Let's start with a game. Can I say one thing? Real quick. You can say half a thing. This is good for snack food because it's quiet. It's quiet snack food. They should book it that way. Rice Krispie Treats are quiet?

Okay, potato chips, just think of it. That's what you wanted to say? Wow, it's not making a noise at all. I'm hearing a snap, crackle, and pop on that bite. Almost as if they warned us. What's happening? I just, I didn't get to say who I'm playing for. Oh, really?

Yeah, and I'm playing for Dan. Dan is with Wolves. I'm playing for the guy that brought the bacon jerky because I thought it would fuck Todd up if I took the one he thought he was going to take because then he'd have to start picking again. And then he had a meltdown about the Krispy Kremes. So it worked. It was a little mind games.

I played the game within the game. Yeah, Todd's definitely the one you want to fuck with to help yourself potentially win. Oh, Todd is the clear favorite tonight. win Oh Todd is the clear favorite tonight with the games I selected anybody could win starting we're gonna start with Todd wins this game I think you got a good shot here Todd just win I did win last time I did the show you He did. Just saying. So sit up.

All right. This first game we're going to play is called Live, Die, Repeat. I'll say the title of a movie. You guys repeat it back to win. First person to say the full correct title that I'm looking for is the winner of this game. Can you dig it? Yes, I can. Shut your mouth.

Shut your mouth. I haven't started yet. Oh, Jesus. Oh, I thought you were going to say, I thought you were going to yell, I haven't started yet. Oh, no, I wasn't playing around. All right. Oh, Jesus. I thought you were going to yell at how it started yet. I wasn't playing around. Here we go.

Shaft. Shaft. Someone has to say it first. Shaft in Africa. Shafts. Oh, good guess, Jeff. Shafts. Goes to Africa? Shafts. Shaftsbury Place? Shafts. Shaftsbury

Place. Shafts Big Score? Shafts Big Adventure. Shafts Big Adventure. What the fuck? Shafts Big Sea. Shafts Big Sea. Shafts Big Cock. Shafts Big

Sea. Kid Venture. Shafts Big Secret. Kid Venture. Shaft's Big Secret. Shaft's Big Secret. Jeff got it, but he put a question mark at the end. Shaft's Big Secret? Can I tell you

something, and I promise I'm being honest? From 1972. Followed by Shaft in Africa. It's called Shaft's Big Secret? Yes. What's the titular secret? It turns out he's got a giant cock. Did not see that one coming.

Talking about Shaft. John Shaft. What was your question, Todd? I thought I was going to do good at this because when you said you were going to say the movie, I thought you were just going to say it. Oh, yeah. Okay, let's do it again.

Christmas vacation. Let's do it again. Christmas vacation. Yeah, you're right. That's how he should have done it. No, that's not how you should have done it. Let's do it again. Shaft's Big Secret.

Shaft's Big Secret. Whoa. I'm too excited. Sorry. That's a big secret. Whoa! I'm too excited. Sorry. He really liked golf. That was the secret. He solved the case, but he was trying to give it a secret. How much he liked golf.

He loved, yeah, he loved just being out on the links. All right. Our second game tonight is a new one. Yeah, we're playing a new game. Jeff won that first game. He gets to go first in this game. And then we'll go to Todd and then to Griffin and then to Ross. I'll ask you one at a time.

If somebody misses, the next person gets a chance to steal. And if they miss again, the next person gets a chance. What are you doing? Because this is a multiple choice answer, Todd. There's three options. Are you ready? The game is called... Gaga or Goo Goo.

I'm going to name a movie, and you tell me if it's got a song on the soundtrack by Lady Gaga or the Gugu dolls. Or neither. Who came up with that? I did. I came up with all this shit. It was inspired by a baby he saw.

Gaga. Yeah, baby really gave me this idea. So I do it by myself. Everyone's going to play. Everyone's going to play, but you get the first one, Todd. It's Gaga, Goo Goo, or Neither. Okay. Which or neither of those has a song on the soundtrack of the movie Twister?

Lady Gaga. You're saying Gaga. No, I'm repeating it. Gaga, Goo Goo, or neither. Well, who's Goo Goo?

Goo Goo Dolls. Oh, okay. I'm going to say Goo Goo Dolls. That's what you're going with in the motion picture Twister?

Okay. I'm just confirming that you want to go with that Oh no wait no Let me say yes Goo goo No no What was the other one Gaga

Lady Gaga Lady Gaga Final answer I'm sorry For the movie Twister No you can't Fucking keep doing that I can't keep doing it

I'm the host So is it Goo goo Gaga Or neither For the movie Twister I'm the host. So is it Goo Goo Gaga or neither for the movie Twister? I'm saying Gaga, final answer. Okay, that is incorrect. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. I accept it. I don't know why you got to go first.

Jeff was supposed to go first. No, you said you're going first. This is recorded. No, but Jeff won the last game. Well, then you messed up. Yeah. All right, so we'll go to you now. The Goo Goo Dolls. We'll go to you, Jeff. Goo Goo Dolls.

You're on the list. Why is it so weird? I mentioned one song. I went off card and picked my own. Goo Goo or neither, Jeff. Or Twister? Yeah. Goo Goo.

Yeah, Goo Goo Dolls. They have a song in Twister. I said that first. You did, and I talked you out of it by just asking you if you were sure. Yeah, you had a tone in your voice. You go like this. You go, for the movie, Twister! Yeah.

And guess what? You changed your mind because of it. You're right. Well, I did it because I was right to. All right. Now we go to Ross. Ross, you get this next one. Does it have a gaga or a goo goo?

Or neither? Neither. Transformers, Dark of the Moon. Oh, shit. Dark of the moon. Oh, shit. I mean, she seems like she would be against selling out like that. Or not.

I don't know. It's probably one of those. Yeah, what the hell am I saying? Yeah, fuck it. Lady Gaga. You're going Gaga? I mean, it's probably neither, but let's go with Gaga. Why not? All right.

Good try, by the way. The way you tried that, you did it the same way for him. For me, you win. Gaga? That's the way I heard it. Yeah, and guess what? He's incorrect. Oh, now who's

incredulous? Well, we'll see. It moves on to the next person. Do I get this on rebound? Is it your turn next? I think it is. Yeah? Neither? No. Todd.

Now, we're not going to remind you which ones have been said. So, which one is it? He said Gaga. Maybe not. She would sell. Maybe she did sell out. So, I think he went Gaga. I'm going to go.

Wait. Okay. He said neither. Wait. I was so. All you have to do is say the third thing that wasn't said. I know. I know.

That's hard to do. It is hard to do. You're right. I'm going to say Goo Goo. Goo Goo. Final answer. You're going Goo Goo? Oh, God.

Oh, God. Goo Goo? Do you want to say that? Can I role play it one more time? Role play it. I remember he said... I remember he goes, I don't know if Lady Gaga would do it because she wouldn't sell out

but I remember she would. Todd, you might be on every episode from now on. I'm going to say I know I'm wrong but I'm going to own it at least. Goo Goo, final answer. Goo Goo is correct. Oh. All of a sudden I get cocky.

All right, Jeff. It's your turn, right? Yeah. Well, he said neither. It's your turn Yeah it's my turn I thought about it The first No subtitle

Transformers Yeah what indeed Audience member I'm gonna say Lady Gaga Incorrect Yeah I thought so Ross I had no faith in it I'm gonna say. Incorrect. Yeah, I thought so. Ross.

I had no faith in it. I'm going to say neither. Incorrect. Griffin. Goo Goo Dolls? Goo Goo Dolls is correct. Was it a different song? I know, right?

It was a different song. Yeah, that's crazy. Why does Michael Bay have a boner for the Goo Goo Dolls? I don't know. I don't know. Todd. Jesus. Transformers, Revenge of the Fallen.

Why is that? Goo Goo, Gaga, or neither. Use your microphone. I think it has something to do with them laughing at the mere name of the movie. It seems like to you guys it was easy. Well, I know. I think they were laughing because it's the third Transformers movie.

Okay. And you might not know this, but the Transformers movies are terrible. Okay. That's why everybody laughs. We're going to have to cut that out of the show because I'm trying to do a more upbeat. The Transformers movies are amazing. Thank you. That's why everybody laughed.

They have generally fond memories of the Transformers series. What do you think, Todd? Ask me one more time. Transformers, Revenge of the Fallen. Goo Goo, Gaga, or neither? Okay, you're saying they're shitty movies. Is that the truth? No.

Well, they're Transformers movies. They're about robots that turn into cars. Okay, I get it. And vice versa. I'm going to say Lady Gaga wouldn't... I don't know what she would do. You're going to say what's not in it? Well, that's the way you have to figure it out.

Okay, so you're narrowing it down. So you're saying Gaga's not the answer? Do you want a role play? Neither. Neither final answer. You're going neither final answer. That is correct. Wow.

This is how I've gotten through life. I just figure it's time. I'm pretty good at guessing. Like without facts or anything. Oh, no. You are terrific. Not guessing, but like figuring it out. Terrific at guessing.

Why? How? You know, I think they know what I mean. All right. Jeff, the motion picture that appeared on the Netflix yeah called war machine goo goo gaga or neither I'm gonna say I don't know Lady Gaga That is correct. Yeah. Please don't cry for that. Did they click the air on?

Say what? Maybe like click the air down a degree. What do you mean? Click it on or click it off? Watch your mouth. I told you my mom was here tonight. John Shaft. Turn it on.

Detective John Shaft. Click it on. Detective John Shaft. Click it down a degree, so cool it off. Can we click it down? It's never been said in the history of words. Make it cooler. A little bit cooler. That sounds mean. Make it cooler, please.

Are you hot? A little bit. That means turn the air up. No, you have to turn the air down. I know you're right technically, but some people will... Oh, man, this is one of those drive-on-a-parkway things. No, it isn't. Technically, it's turn it down if you want it up,

but I always used to say, can you turn the air up? And people go, you want it up or down? Look, make it colder. What the fuck? When I was at a comedy club and they played that game. Right, that's a bullshit phrase now. Now that I think about it, you're right, Todd. It's hot in here. You know what I mean.

Look at me, when I say something about the thermostat, it's always to make it cooler. It's never to make it warmer. This face never goes, hey, it's a little chilly in here. This face always goes, am I the only one sweating? Maybe I got food poisoning. Okay, Ross, it's your turn.

Batman and Robin. Oh, I think this is a Goo Goo Dolls thing. Goo Goo, Gaga, or neither. I remember this. Yeah, Goo Goo Dolls. Goo Goo, Gaga, or neither. I remember this. Yeah, Goo Goo Dolls. You're going Goo Goo? Yeah. That is correct.

Ross is on the board. Okay, Griffin. Wedding Crashers. Goo Goo, Gaga, or neither. I believe The Wedding Crashing Wedding Crashers Soundtrack has neither

That is correct Nicely done I was running through the track list in my head How many songs do you know? Death Cab for Cutie Sound of Settling I know that's on there Todd Glass

Shout on there Todd Glass Wow These are so good Are you ready Todd? I know that's on there. Todd Glass. On there. Todd Glass. Wow. These are so good. Are you ready, Todd? Yes. A Star is Born. Does it have a song by Gaga,

Goo Goo, or Neither? I want to say Neither. This is, when I say this is how I've gotten through life, just by no facts or anything, I got through life in second grade. I figured it out.

I could read my teacher's face. Follow your instincts. Follow your instincts. I was wrong a lot, more than I wasn't right, but I still got through it. That's why I give myself a high grade. Lock it in, Todd. I would copy off of dumb kids.

I couldn't read my teacher's face. I I thought when I went it's on the pronoun and she would go and I go not the pronoun all right I just looked I said air-conditional and someone looked at me I went it's not air-conditional is it when I was like in first grade so this is what I'm doing I'm looking at your face some people would say I know you know you wouldn't do it again. You already did Not Neither, but I'm going to say Not Neither because I think you did it to make it easy for me.

So what are you saying? What's your answer? Neither. Am I right? This is why you're one of the top ten guests on my shows. I did a poll recently, and you did quite well. Thank you. Yeah. But that answer's incorrect.

That is... Wow. Jeff, good luck. You still got two more choices. Movies to choose. I mean, bands. I mean, two more choices Movies to choose I mean bands I mean two more choices Is it Goo Goo or Gaga

A Star is Born It's Lady Gaga Yeah No it isn't Because that movie is an old movie And she's just been It is it? I didn't know they remade it.

Why is that a bad thing? Hey, you didn't know his shit too. We all don't know something. No, that's fair. In his defense, he didn't know that they remade it three more times. Oh, I didn't know that.

I didn't see the first one. It's Neil Diamond, right? Is it not? I don't know. I was pretty sure it wasn't that because I thought it was. What was that movie with Neil Diamond that sounds like?

Jazz Singer. Jazz Singer. Yeah. There's a song in there called A Star is Born. Something's going on. Jeff would like to talk to you, Todd. I just needed a second to catch my breath.

I was trying to get his attention so I could breathe again. All right, so Jeff won that game. He handled it. Congratulations. That's a good little achievement. All right, we're going to play one last game. Where's your microphone, Todd? We're going to play Last Man Stanton. But it's going to be a very special edition.

I'm not going to play along because I already know the name that we're going to play tonight. Since Jeff won that last game, we'll switch the order around. We're going around. Which way were we going before? It was Todd, then you. So then we'll go you It was Todd, then you. So then we'll go you, then Todd, and then Griffin, and then Roz.

And this is going to be an intense round of this game because this is not an actor who has a lot of credits. There might not be enough, so the last person in order to say a title that this person has been in a movie they've been in is going to be our winner. It's going to be... you'll see. Jeff, I do not envy you going first, because by the time it gets back to you, it may be tough. You have to cool the room off this way.

I'm not worried. I bet you I'll know too. Now I don't know what this person's name's going to be. Is it me? You don't even have Todd, you don't even have a lot of clothes on. You took your jacket off.

I did. It's not that hot in here, really. I'll tell you, this guy's breath's so bad, his bad breath came through the speaker in the comedy club. Too long. Was that your Mitch Hedberg impression? I used to do Mitch Hedberg impersonations. I still do, but I used to, too. And I did his joke about, I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.

And I did his joke about, I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too. But I still do it, but I used to, too. Hey, earlier, the bad breath of the speakers didn't smell like tacos. Do you put cash in your tacos? No, Jeff's just paraphrasing jokes that Todd stole for somebody

else. I didn't steal it. She gave it to me. She gave it to you. Why would you say that? You're right. She gave it to you. Fair and square. It's colder in here now. Don't you feel it? It's great. I'm glad you're happy. I think everybody's happy. We're trying to wrap this thing up with a little game.

Shouldn't take long. Jeff, you're going first. Then we're going to Todd. No lifelines. Yeah. This is intense plus because we don't have much time. I don't want to make the next show start late.

The films of Brody Stevens. Yeah. He's a successful actor and also appeared as himself in a few projects. What do you think, Jeff?

I'm going to say The Hangover. The Hangover. That is right. By my count, he's got nine feature film credits. Todd, what do you think? A lot of people don't know this, but he was in, he wore, that day he didn't want to do it. I already like where you're going with this. This is true.

He didn't want to do it, and he was in a funk. And Zach was like, just pull the hat over your head. Just wear the hat over your head. And he did, and he was in an episode of Baskets. But you might have not noticed it. Can I just back you up for just a second and say that Jeff said The Hangover.

Now, what's your guess? Baskets. But if you were... Like Like that's a TV show But if you were just sticking with movies And you heard someone say That he was in The Hangover What would the next most logical Hangover 2

Yes very good Griffin Newman Not including movies He was cut out of that he used to reference you can't say funny people I will say due date due date is right

Ross you might already be in trouble I apologize but I had to pay tribute to our friend even if it means you have to suffer it's fair I apologize, but I had to pay tribute to our friend. Even if it means you have to suffer. It's fair. It's a fair trade. I think he was in The Hangover Part 3, right?

No. He wasn't. No. To quote Brody... Fuck them. Yeah, exactly. Well, I'm... All right. He's not happy about it.

That's why I tanked I heard back to you Jeff you got one more there's six more films I know there's six more? yeah but those were the three those were the ones

that he always mentioned. Brody Stevens was in The Expendables. I wish Brody Stevens was in The Expendables, but no, he was not. Was he in Run, Run, Run? That's not how this works. No, Run, Run, Run was my guess. You don't just keep guessing things. Oh, that's your official guess? Yeah, the other one was a joke. Everybody laughed. Okay.

I know. Todd, do you have another one? I'm gonna just have to pass. Okay. Oh, we can pass? Griffin, well, I mean, he's basically out. I know. Yeah, he's not gonna pass back know. Yeah, he's not going to pass back in.

Griffin, do you have any other ones? I mean, it's only rubbing it in because you're the winner. Really? I think so. You're the last one to successfully name. Hangover Part 2. Cut out of funny people. That's what I'm saying.

Wasn't in Hangover Part 2. I know. Fuck them. I'm out. Those are the ones we know. Yeah. He was male announcer in a movie called Blind Ambition. He was the hoagie guy in a movie called I'll Believe You.

Oh, I know what that was. He played himself in R2-PC Road to Park City. Whatever the fuck that is. Utah. I, of course, I'm credited as a producer on a movie called Earbuds,

the podcasting documentary. He's in that, I'm proud to say. He's also in another movie that I, I don't know if I'm in this one. I think I'm not in this one. I Am Comic he's in.

He's in I Am Comic, that's right. You know, that's what somebody reminded me the other day that me and my friend Jimmy were there, and we asked Brody to go on last. But we don't know the camera's so far away,

so you start talking casually. So we're like, will you go on last? Because we have shows. We both said we have shows to get to. So he didn't really want to go on last. He's like, oh, I'll go on last. And then 10 minutes passed by. He goes, hey, where are your shows?

We're like, we don't have any shows. And then we realized we had lied to him. And we said, well, the truth is, we just wanted to get high and watch you perform. He goes, we don't have any shows. And then we realized we had lied to him. And we said, the truth is, we just wanted to get high and watch you perform. He goes, okay, I'll do it.

And so we just headlined. But that was it. I am comic. That was, and that story is available in stories you can tell to clear people out of your house.

It's a coffee table, but for when you want people to leave. There's stories in there. That's one of them. You know, you want people to leave the stories in there that's one of them you know you want people to leave you don't want to be rude and then he appears uncredited as a Jewish agent in Sarah Silverman Jesus's magic yeah I don't I didn't think he was an agent I thought he's more like a bodyguard kind of character but whatever whatever it was, we miss him.

And congratulations, Griffin Newman, you're our winner. Bringing the Brody Stevens knowledge. So, you were playing for Big Feff. Big Feff, Jason Pfeffer. You want to come get your prizes? Can you make your way down here?

The Sour Patch Kids, by the way. We've all been feasting on them. Oh, my God. Can I try? Tropical flavor? Are you fucking kidding me? They're so good. Get them down here, will you?

Thank you. I'm into that. Yeah, congratulations, Faf. Yeah, you got breakfast cereal and everything. I hope you retroactively enjoy my impression six hours from now. Tick! Oh, those tropical sourpats. That's weird.

It's weird to have sour and tropical at the same time. Weirdly delicious. Yeah. You say so. Ross Marquand, what do you got to plug, dude? The Walking Dead's on AMC right now season 9

we're a small show we're really hoping that you guys will watch us I wish it would catch on with people because it's really special and unique and cultish yeah but thanks for being here dude

Griffin Newman what's going on with you? Tick season 2 cult-ish. Yeah, but thanks for being here, dude. Griffin Newman, what's going on with you? Tick season two, April 5th. Doug Loves Movies exclusive. Tick season one on Amazon right now. Don't wait to watch. And I host a podcast called Blank Check with Griffin and David

that's about movies. Listen to that, please. Yay, Todd Glass. My Act Happy special on Netflix, if you haven't seen it, and then some dates real quick. So I'll be South by Southwest coming up the first weekend in March,

and then I'm going to the St. Louis Helium and Portland Helium all in March. Oh, those will be a gas. It must be a gas. So there you go. St. Louis helium? Yeah. Love that place. Good time right over there behind the Weber Grill restaurant.

I haven't been there yet. Is that where it's at? Yeah. Jeff Tate. Hello. Thanks for having me. It's always great Jeff Tate hello thanks for having me it's always great to have you but can we have this conversation outside

what do you have to plug I got a thing on March 15th oh a thing check it out everybody Jeff's got a thing on March 15th. Oh, a thing? Check it out, everybody. Jeff's got a thing. You know what to do. Yeah, go there. It's on March 5th.

15th. 15th? Yeah, March 15th. Well, now nobody knows what to do. Well, they would. Just give me a second. Okay. March 15th, Street City Pub in downtown Cincinnati.

March 16th, Shake It Records in Northside, Cincinnati. I'm doing stand-up shows at both those places. Okay. Yeah. Come to either one. I mean, nobody here, don't take their reaction as how good that show's going to be. These LA stiffs don't know what they're missing. People in LA barely get excited about shows in LA. Why would they care about Cincinnati?

Well, you should care because it's dope. And then I have a podcast with my brother called Altered Tates. All right. Jeff Tate, everybody. There it is. I'm doing stand-up April 19th at the Royal Oak Music Theater in Royal Oak, Michigan. Jeff, are you busy that night? I don't believe so.

Okay, maybe you'll be on that show. I'll do it. All right. Todd is in. I'm free. I'm free. You don't have a big show somewhere on April 20? Don't you like to do a show somewhere then?

Saturday this year. I don't think I do. Oh, you know what? I'm in Portland. You're you know what? I'm in Portland. Nice. Yeah, good city, right? Yeah, that's great. Good for you. Especially on 420. Do you get it?

Yeah, fuck yeah. Fuck, I get it. Of course I do. Alright, so we gotta get going, but I just want to say that the next show here at UCB Franklin in L.A. is on March 26th. And thank you to everybody for coming out tonight. And I just decided that, like, a lot of times people don't write shitheads on their name tags anyway.

And so in honor of our friend Brody Stevens, I thought that I would change the end of the show and end on a, instead of criticizing and saying who's shitheads in the world, I would just end with one of his catchphrases from this point forward. So get ready with the end theme right after I say, as Brody always did,

positive energy!