Doug Loves Movies - Wyatt Cenac, Dan Soder and Har Mar Superstar guest

Episode Date: April 28, 2015

Live from Gramercy Hall in NYC, Doug welcomes Wyatt Cenac, Dan Soder and Har Mar Superstar to the show. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeaky babies, sticky seeds With 50 acid pop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Because Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey, everybody. My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Love Movies. Coming to you once again for a two-night stand from the Gramercy Theater in New York City. I'm holding a lot of bags.

Yeah, it's Monday, right? April 27th, 2015. Let me see your name tags, Manhattan. Oh, my goodness. I've seen a few of those already on Twitter. There's some really large ones over there. Bottle Rob Kit.

What's the last movie you saw? Bottle Rob Kit. Time's up. You can't ask everyone sitting around you. What's this really complicated one in the front row? It looks like it's got a lot of little images on it. It's build a title of all of

the movies that were in that long build a title I did last year. You made it up out of your own name. Alright, well next time do my idea. No, I was just guessing, but it looks really cool and I hope it gets picked because it

looks like you put a lot of work into it. On the other hand, there's a guy with a plastic lightsaber or sword of some kind, and I guess it's a lightsaber, and he wrote on a piece of paper, Brian Wars. He's the guy at work that they're just like oh god here comes the awful pun guy does it light up no fucking broke dick lightsaber. And then there's the lady.

Lady! What's her name? Catherine? Katie? Katie. Who brought... She wore a facehugger. It's still in my home, and it's kind of scary. She made a macrame facehugger from Alien, and now she's holding it up for everybody to be horrified by

because it's really something even scarier about it being on a mannequin head with no human eyes or no eyes in there and no nose. That's the crazy, scary creature from Pan's Labyrinth. Right? Yeah. I told her she should also make mittens with eyes on the hands. And apparently that was a big request

for four or five hours ago. But good luck to you and do you go to the movies, Katie? What was the last one you saw? Reservoir Dogs. Interesting. Just getting around to it or rewatching it? Just looking for more macrame ideas? Look, I macrame'd a Mr. Pink costume. They just wear suits.

All right. Oh, my God. Devin, I saw on Twitter today that this huge name tag that you're holding up is a last-minute affair. Could you flip it around for the audience to see he took the russell crowe diviner uh poster and uh the water diviner and changed it to the water deviner but he changed it by just putting lots of extra space around the poster. A lot of arrows. And normally he puts a lot more work into it, but today he just did this.

This is his idea of a last-minute name tag. Still pretty elaborate. All right, Devin. And thank you, everybody, for bringing those things in. Good luck to everybody. Good luck. Were there any up in the balcony? No? A couple?

Sorry. They might come. Sometimes the guests are ornery, and they go all the way up there to look at name tags. So we'll see how that goes. The Fort Wayne International Ballroom is getting a stand-up show by me next Thursday. Douglas Movies is coming to Denver on Mother's Day. DouglasMovies.com for all my tour date information.

Information. Like I'm trying to coin a new word that's like information but quicker and snappier. So information I think is really going to get the job done. First of all, that word is informative. From the corrections department, there are some films that I won't see. The prize bag tonight, you guys, is multiple prize bags

because the guests are so generous tonight and just brought their own bags. I know this very flamboyant Avenue Q muppety-looking bag is... I actually brought that. Somebody gave that to me at a show, and I actually traveled with it to New York to use as the prize bag. Then we got, like like two other bags,

and they're all just chock full of stuff. I grow quite weary holding it. I'm so weary! I just get so theatrical when I'm here. Let's get my guests out here. We got three newbies and one old bee, you guys. Let's give a big, warm Gramercy Theater welcome to

Dan Soder, Ben Bailey, Wyatt Sinek, and Harmar Superstar! I feel like we're ready to do a little four-part harmony. I'm definitely the guy in the band that goes, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And all the Philly steaks you could eat all right well let's let's get this over with let's say hi first and foremost to ben bailey is back everybody welcome back thanks dog your dreams for your ticket out

it works your mic works mine's just gonna be a little bit hotter so Welcome back. Thanks, Doug. Your dreams are your ticket out. It works. Your mic works. Mine's just going to be a little bit hotter, so get used to that, my friend. I'll just be like one of those sound effects comics guys who's all like, oh, yeah, motherfucker! I'll still be loud. God damn it. But I like to cut the microphone as well. But I cup it from a place called the shadows.

The microphone betrays you because it belongs to me. It can get louder or deeper in the shadows. There's a couple of spots when you're walking through the Houston airport where the acoustics are just right that if you just launch into a bane, about seven or eight people that happen to be walking by will get it very loud all of a sudden. So you're going to make someone either very happy

or terrify the shit out of someone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hope you endure your flight. You know, that out of someone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hope you endure your flight. You know, that kind of thing. Margaret, Margaret. What was that, Margaret? Who was that deep-voiced man? I don't know, dear.

I really wish I knew what you guys were doing. Ben, what was I going to ask you about? I don't know. A red light challenge? No. Like some crack about me driving a fucking car of some sort? Maybe.

Have you seen on the Playboy channel, they have a red light challenge. It's you see if you can jerk one out before the light changes is that true is that real yeah they have a playmate sitting in a shotgun right you know and so you can drive in the hov lane and nope that way nobody's late to the set here's my point i don't know if you heard about this ben but there's a gentleman in the audience that's a huge fan of you and your work. Or maybe just saying the words Ben Bailey out loud. Oh, really? Okay, yeah, I see it. And we did a show here a while back in March where that dude yelled out Ben Bailey.

Oh, no. I'd say at least a good dozen times throughout the course of the show. Never got thrown out because it's a friendly vibe. We got a friendly vibe around here. But I thought, you know what, this guy's gonna keep doing that if I just keep letting this guy come in and yell Ben Bailey over and over again.

So I figured out a way to get him to shut the fuck up. And that's Ben Bailey is going to he's going to have a word with you if you yell out Ben Bailey. And that goes against every fiber of his being because he's

trying to promote himself as an artist and a nice person. But man, it was annoying. That's an interesting interpretation of my goals. It was funny though. He didn't get thrown out. This is an interesting interpretation of my goals. It was funny, though. He didn't get thrown out. This is an interesting scenario.

He just yelled Ben Bailey over and over again. I'd like to apologize to you for that. It's not your fault. I'd like to thank you for it. You say that until he murders you. Yeah. Ben Bailey! Ben Bailey!

Ben Bailey! Ben Bailey! And I'll be like, thank you, thank you, thank you. Thanks, man. And Doug will be like, can we start the fucking show? Why do you keep coming and yelling my name at a show that I'm not a part of? Oh, he's getting alpha bend. Well, even if he yelled it like you're here tonight

If he yelled your name 12 times It would still be inappropriate But still, it'd be weird It'd be uncomfortable Unless Ben first yelled out What's my name? That's a good point That's a really good point

You should get this guy's information If you ever get Alzheimer's, you invite him to your shows. People would tell me everywhere. Anyway, you're the cash cap guy. I'd be like, oh, right, thanks. Hey, listen, cash cap guy, what'd you bring for the prize bag? I brought a prize basket. Okay.

A gift basket. That doesn't fit in the bag at all. It's a big basket with looks like a lot of great stuff in there. Do you want to tear it open and tell them what's in it? Well, I can read some. No, I can't really read any of them.

There's butterscotch hard candies and there's dessert truffles. Oh, boy. Yeah, dessert truffles. There's a. Yeah, dessert truffles. Sounds amazing. Where there's a pirouette. No, pirouline. Chocolate hazelnut cookies. There's lots of stuff.

Are you giving that to the Ben Bailey guy? And there's also, in the back, there's... Is it a shithead? The complete fourth season, there's... Is it a shithead? The complete fourth season of Duck Dynasty. It is a shithead? Is that what they meant? It's just a whole basket of shit that's not really good for you. Oh, okay.

Oh, this is, yeah, you brought this. Okay, so, I'm starting a prize pile is what I'm doing because... Oh, okay, all right. It's going to be two, there's too many bags and too much stuff for there to be one prize bag tonight. What's my name? Ben Bailey! Dude, you got your...

What the fuck have I started? Who's got the louder mic now, motherfucker? That's like your thing from now on, asking the crowd, what's my name? And they yell Ben Bailey. I'm going to kill myself. I gotta be honest, it felt a little Master Race-y. You just standing there.

It was your idea. I know, but now I regret it. Just like Hitler's black friend regretted giving him that suggestion. Hitler's friend, Moishe, was like, what have I done? That's half of that conversation. Wyatt Sinek is here, everybody.

Wyatt Sinek. What's your name? What's that? What happened? What's going on, man? How you doing? I'm all right. All right.

I've apparently created a fascist dictator to my right, but beyond that. What is my name? You started a movement. Not since someone yelled Amy Adams have I been so angry. I'm furious right now. Wyatt is in David Cross's movie, this directorial debut called Hits. That's right. Right?

Yeah, that's right. You play someone named Babatunde? I do, yeah. A dude named Babatunde? I do play a dude named Babatunde. That's cool.

And I had dreadlocks for the movie. I don't know what to say. Was that fun to have him and experience it briefly? You obviously gave up on them already. Yeah, no, they were itchy. I don't recommend it if you don't like an itchy scalp.

You think maybe weed helps with an itchy scalp? That's why they don't mind it? Probably, yeah. Coconut oil. I think coconut oil is the key. Obviously, though, I oil, I think. Coconut oil is the key. Obviously, though, I'm not an expert. Geez, Ben can't let any trivia question go. He's really good.

No, I think that's a record. That's a record for how long that took. The answer is C, coconut oil. My name isn't... Oh, no way. Sorry. You brought me back into it. That won't stop the people's voices

I got another version who does Doug Benson hate I was pointing at Dan Soder's here everybody Doug Benson hates me I've gotten used to his voice because he's a frequent guest on a show I like to used to his voice because he's a frequent guest on a show I like to listen to called the

Opie and Jimmy show on Sirius XM and yeah so I'm glad we got you on the show and you're here to participate I'm very happy to be here and witness I'm happy to witness

the birth of the Ben Bailey movement. I was there. Can you believe we were there when that happened? Yeah. When the world caught fire with Ben Bailey. Also known as my looper.

Ben's here to kill me What did you bring for the prize bag? I brought I don't have an album out But my roommate Who will be on Conan on next Wednesday Mike Vecchione He's got an album So I brought that out You brought a copy of Mike Vecchione. He's got an album, so I brought that out.

You brought a copy of Mike Vecchione's album? Yeah. That's a wonderful gift. You're plugging him, but you're here. You're getting plugged also, for sure. Oh, that sounds threatening. As long as everybody's getting plugged. Yes.

Well, because I have a special surprise guest plugger. Harmar Superstar is here, everybody. Hola. How's it going, man? Thank you. First time guest as well. Now, I've been on your podcast. That's true.

That was just us with somebody else sitting around in a hotel room. Yeah, Matt Myra? Yeah, Matt Myra was there. We just sat in a hotel room and chatted for a while. Yeah, I had a really interesting podcast. That's why it's still going on right now. No, I stopped doing it. You stopped doing it?

Yeah, I got a little lazy. I tour a lot. Uh-oh. He just got shut down. That's what you get for crossing Ben Bailey. I can't stop. I can't stop swearing, and Ben Bailey did just tamper with my wife.

What were we talking about? So the podcast is no more. Not right now. Yeah, I've been touring too much to keep it together. Well, I'm happy to get people in touch again with your talking voice. It feels good. And your sense of humor. One of the most entertaining live shows you can see.

Have you guys seen Harumaru Superstar perform? Yeah, if you've seen it, you respond like that. If you haven't seen it, you just sit here going, no idea what you're talking about. And yeah, so go see. You got a bunch of tour dates coming up? I don't right now. I'm just making a new album.

I'm just sitting around trying to figure out what's the most comfortable way for my short legs in this chair. I'm doing the perch, but it exposes my crotch a bit to the audience. I'm just glad I have, for the first time, no holes here, which is normally the norm for my jean situation. So I'm taking advantage of this just high perch. And it's comedy that the listeners at home are really going to enjoy not being able to see. So that's cool.

It's a visual. It's gargoyle comedy. See, this is the kind of podcasting people are missing out on because you don't. Now, how do you let people or how do you like people to refer to you? Har? Harmar? Sir? HM? It's Harmar or Sean. I go by both.

I've picked my name. I like them both. Alright. Hey, guys. I don't want to confuse the listeners because if I switch back and forth between two different names then it'll sound like I have five guests. Let's do Harmar then. Okay, we'll Harmar it I have five guests. Let's do Har-Mar, then. Okay, we'll Har-Mar it up all night long.

Yeah. Superstar. I thought Superstar would have been one of the options you gave him. You were like Har or Mar. Mar. Sir. Superstar. But Superstar didn't come up as an option. Mr. Superstar.

Dr. Superstar. If I were a doctor, I'd change my last name to Superstar. But superstar didn't come up as an option. Mr. Superstar. Dr. Superstar. If I were a doctor, I'd change my last name to Superstar. Can doctors change their last name to something silly after they've become a doctor? Wouldn't somebody step in and say, hey, you can't have a silly name, you're a doctor? Now you have to be a substitute teacher. Like if my dentist was Dr. Linguini that would make me so happy I think he's out there you just have to find him

my dentist has a big plate of chocolate chip cookies in the reception area are you kidding? it's so fucking weird just always? yeah all the time he's trying to get business back in the door I guess so but he also why would you want to have to clean people's teeth when they're full of chocolate chips that they just ate?

He's like, I like to make my job just that much more difficult. Dr. Linguini. He was bored. He got tired of feeding people linguini before dental visits. Noodles? That's for rookies. This is too easy. I like chocolate on my teeth. Anybody could eat linguine and then clean their teeth.

Now that's a spicy root canal. And scene. Harmar was in, he's the star of Pitch Perfect. The main star. The main attraction. Top build. Yeah. He's in the very funny acapella

older men's. Yeah, the old guys. Well, ten years after high school, right? Yeah, college. We're just hanging around. We got nothing else to do. Yeah. But that leads me to the question. Pitch Perfect 2 out this summer.

Yeah. Are you going to return an appearance? Well, my tour schedule. Yeah, this is a big regret in my life. Oh, no. Because I was supposed to be in Pitch Perfect 2, but my tour schedule interfered once the date got sort of jumbled around. Oh.

But, hey, guys, guys no i just have constant reminders of the money i'm not making every time i go on the street lately so that's pretty cool that's great that's the that's the that's the long-lasting great part of it and uh so that'll be a few weeks but root for the movie as well no i'm psyched about it and guess what and then they'll make pitch perfect three they'll ask you back. You gotta feel bad about what happened. No, I think Reggie actually is me in Pitch Perfect 2, Reggie Watts. Oh yeah, so you're out of a job

for good. I'm gone. I am out. But you know what I mean? It could be five guys, because you've already been established. Like, he'll be a new guy, he won't be playing your character. No, exactly. This is an acapella group, man. I can go back from the dead. I had so much to do with

the first plot line that I think that it can't go unseen in the third one at least. The other dude from Scrubs is in there. Yeah, Donald Faison. Joe LaTrulio. Trulio, yeah. Who I saw sing in a wedding recently

That was Amazing Great Jason Jones too Jason Jones and the group It was a fun little riff Little machine you guys had going there When you showed up

No spoilers What? Now Ben Bailey... We did me first at the beginning, Doug. I know, but now I have a question for you. I'm just jumping around asking questions. This is like a talk show. It's all right.

But it's about movies, so hang on. Don't answer until I get to the movie part. Okay. Okay. But it's about movies, so hang on. Don't answer until I get to the movie part. Okay. You had an uncredited role in Delivery Man? Yes, I did. All right, moving on to... These questions are so easy so far. What did you play in it and why were you uncredited?

I don't know why I'm uncredited. America wants to know. I don't know why I'm uncredited. America wants to know. I don't know the answer. I know what I played. I played a Polish mafia tough guy who went to shake Vince Vaughn's character down for some cash that he owed us. And, no, not in a cab.

Thank you. It wasn't me. No, it was the people are turning on you, Ben Bailey. They're turning on you. They're a fickle bunch. You know, you asked me this question once before I probably did, yeah.

Just like then, you don't really seem to be interested in the answer. No, I've loved I'm going to love that answer every time I hear it. Because it's just interesting to me. Did you answer that why are you uncredited part? I don't know why I'm uncredited. It's really kind of a shitty thing for me. I booked the part in that movie.

Well, that's good that we brought it up. Let's talk about it. You get the recognition you deserve. Can I talk about it? Well, there are 90 actors in that movie there's about 110 speaking roles yep and everyone stayed in but me yeah they just there's a clerical error so uh i get the part with a typo i'm playing this polish mafia thug who's got to go and shake vaughn's character down for for eighty thousand dollars what would your character have been called if you'd been in the credits?

Would it have, have they had the nerve to call you a Polish mafia thug? I think I had a name. I can't remember. But no, it was like, it was like, you know, Polish mob henchman number one or something like that. So descriptive. At least I was the first one. The first thing that goes horribly fucking wrong is we have to have a table read in Midtown one

day. So I get a car from Jersey to bring me in. I leave at like six o'clock. I'm supposed to be there at I think nine or eight. No, I'm supposed to be there at eight. I leave two hours. It takes me almost three hours to get into Manhattan from Jersey. And I'm 45 minutes late for the fucking table read.

So now Vince Vaughn and all these people from DreamWorks and all the other actors, everybody's sitting around waiting for my dumb ass to get there because they're all at the hotel where the fucking thing is taking place. Anyway, totally shitty, awful way to start the fucking... Couldn't have gone worse. That's why you're not in the credits. That part. Well, actually...

They were like, oh... Actually, that's just part of why. We were late. It got worse later on. Oh, okay. So I'm off to a bad start. Then we go and we're shooting it, and... Why are we doing this?

I don't know. I don't know. A couple minutes ago, you were like, why do you keep asking me about this? Let me give you the long version. I'm tired of this question. Let me really drag it out. Because you asked me before, and I always kind of wanted to tell you. It just sounds like you were difficult.

Now I feel like I'm going down an emotional road that I shouldn't be going down. I'm not a stable person, Doug. I have issues with anger. And I was really upset about this delivery man thing for a long time. I feel like I fucked it up. Like cash cab was an opportunity for me that was great. And then after that, I had like a window to fucking capitalize and do what i really wanted to do and this was an opportunity for that and i fucked it up oh wow this uh so so badly that i'm not even

credited it's not even like like i was cut out of several other films but i was still credited that i still fucking get residuals. Like, I think I pissed somebody off and they were like, What'd you get cut out of? Spider-Man 2. What'd you play in that? Cafe owner.

Also, tell us which route you took when you drove to the set. Oh, Ben Bailey is right. You're right about that, sir. Yeah. So there's your answer. Because I'm an asshole. That's why I'm uncredited in the delivery man, because I'm a douche.

I don't think it's your fault. I think it's traffic, Ben. I believe in you. Thanks, Dan. I have to. You're the future me. You can change all this. I'm not going to take a cab.

I'm going to take the train into the city. Just fucking listen to me for a second. Just trust me. I've got to take the train. Do not go to work tomorrow. I want to guarantee that I'm credited. Now, you guys aren't supposed to touch each other like in time. Yeah, you're right.

You're right. Don't turn into a too late for that. Also in the prize bag today, we've got a scarf from Hitman Glass and a pretty shirt that somebody gave me and a notebook that somebody gave me. And a lighter from Chameleon Glass. And this is an awesome hat. Willie Nelson's going to have his own brand of marijuana, and this hat commemorates it. It's called Willie's Reserve. Yeah, so wear that if you want to get pulled over.

If you're in the mood for being harassed, slap that on. Put this 420 sticker on your bumper. Listen to Gateway Dog 2, Forced Fun. Yeah, and do anything you want with this bag. You're going to be, someone's going to know that you're on drugs. Did I get all the things you guys brought? What did Wyatt bring for the bag?

Is this you? No, mine's the one that you threw onto the ground. It's the nicest. It's got a lot of nice stuff in there. It's got a poster. What is this garment? This seems really involved. That's a jacket from

when I worked on The Daily Show. Whoa. Slow down. Indecision 2010. Slow down. There's a reason I'm giving it away. It was, yeah, I guess in 2010, we did the midterms and so it was one of those things where whenever we had to travel like we traveled for the midterms and then the network uh decides

to give us a gift that we'll never wear yeah i guess you can't really walk around in this no i can't like that's like i i appreciate, but it's one of those things where for me walking around, it's kind of like, oh, right. Yeah, we get it, asshole. You work on the Daily Show. Yeah, keep wearing your Daily Show stuff. Yeah. You should just go all the way in. Just wear Daily Show stuff every day.

It'd be like if Slim Goodbody just wore that fucking body suit all the time. You'd be like, all right, calm down, man. You're away from the job. Don't show me the aorta right now. I'm trying to eat food. No, I get what you're talking about. That's exactly how I feel when I see Ben in his delivery man jacket. How did you know about that?

I only wear that at home. But yeah, and then I think there's a poster in there and a record. And the bag is from a road gig I did. That's the real winner. A bag from the University of Washington at Bothell. What's the album called? My album is called Brooklyn. There was only a thousand copies of it made.

And I had an extra copy. What's this other album thingy that somebody brought? Oh, that's my album. That's the Harmar Superstar album. Bye Bye 17. You're giving away vinyls? I gave away my roommate's album. Look at that. Harmar Superstar album. Oh! You're telling me it's giving away vinyls? I gave away my roommate's album. Look at that.

Harmar on vinyl, and then you also included your screener, which you're not supposed to give away, to the motion picture Lincoln. Yeah. It's mainly just because I don't want it, and they sent me two copies, and I don't want either one, but... So if there are any reps from SAG listening,

you can revoke his... Don't send me two copies of Lincoln. Actually, it's four years later. I think there's a statute of limitations. Nope, they will still revoke your membership. Damn it, guys. You will not be in Pitch Perfect 3, my friend. I know.

They're going to erase me from Pitch Perfect 1 somehow, actually, I think. They're going to digitally erase you and replace you with Ben Bailey. Until they find out about the Duck Dynasty screener that I brought. Oh my God. For that, you have to be in Duck Dynasty. That's your punishment. You've now got to hang out with those weird dudes and their duck whistles.

You've now got to hang out with those weird dudes and their duck whistles. Somebody's going to win all of that tonight. Yes! Let's talk movies for a second, though, first. Starting with Harmar. Last movie you saw, sir? I just watched Adult Beginners. Ooh, Nick Kroll. Yeah.

Rose Byrne, Bobby Cannavale. Yes, great cast. Yeah. And you enjoyed? Yeah, I love it, man. I thought it was great. I just watched it yesterday afternoon. And yeah, it was great to see Kroll in a more serious kind of role.

Flexing. Not sketch, like one character for a whole movie. Yeah, totally. Exactly. It was good, man. I had a lot of fun. The cast was great. Greg Johnson was in it.

Joel McHale pops up. I don't know. Are you guys excited to see that or what? There we go. All right. Check it out. Check it out. I endorse.

It's great. It's a great movie. I love the Duplasses. You're going to get quoted on the poster and shit. Great stuff. Great stuff. Farmer Superstar. Great stuff.

Great stuff. You never see people repeating like that in the quote in the ad. That's where I have the edge on all the other critics out there. Wyatt, have you seen any movies lately? In the theater or? Anyway, like I always like to know what one did you just see? Because that's, you know, it's fresh in your mind. Oh, okay.

You might still even be thinking about it, like not even sure what you're thinking. The last movie I saw was Star Wars. I just, I got excited after watching the trailer. And so I went back and watched Star Wars.

Okay, all right. Nice. Did you, any new thoughts about, so this is a new hope that you watched, the very first? In truth, I watched both A New Hope and Phantom Menace. Wow. That's an interesting double.

Well, I started with Phantom Menace because I hadn't seen it since it came out, and then I needed to wash that out of my brain. Okay. So I just jumped straight to A New Hope. You still gave Phantom the top-to-bottom review? You watched the whole thing again? Yeah. Wow. It doesn't hold up.

It never did. It didn't hold. At all. To begin with, yeah. Wow. All right. And then, but Star Wars, is there anything about that that's changed for you over the years? No.

The only thing I found myself thinking as I was watching it was for all the technological advances that they have in that future, HD television seems to be the one thing they can't figure out. That was like, you have lightsabers and spaceships, why do you have no, like, vertical hold on your fucking

Princess Leia images? Yeah, you always have to go outside the hut and adjust the rabbit ears. Then Amber Rue yells at you that it's time to eat your soup. Ben, what about you, man? I'm somewhat, well, I'll just tell you. You had all the Star Wars and that other movie we talked about to think about it. I thought about it. Okay.

Don't say Delivery Man. I couldn't get through it. I couldn't get into it. As dry as I may have. I was going to say I'm slightly embarrassed to say the last movie I watched was Hunger Games Catching Fire.

So working your way through all of them, you think? You think you'll watch every one? I hadn't seen any, so I watched the first two. And, wait, what? You watched the first two? Yeah.

So you still got to see Mockingjay, part one. I still have the last one, yeah. But I don't think I'm going to watch it. What turned you south on it? Because I felt the second film was better than the first one. I am going to watch it. Actually, I think they're pretty good movies. I'm going to watch the last one. I'm just kidding. I didn't ask you down here to fucking dick it. I actually, I think they're pretty good movies, you know. Okay. I'm going to watch the last one. I'm just kidding.

Well, I didn't ask you down here to fucking dick around. I want you. I thought that was the whole idea. Oh, yeah, that's true. No, I thought it was pretty good, man. I think those movies like Hunger Games. It keeps getting better and better. Like, you're going to start talking about everything I got snubbed for.

I never had any chance at a role in Hunger Games. But I think it's a good... You know what? You're not in the credits of Hunger Games either. I'm not what? You're not in the credits of Hunger Games. You're right. You're right.

Every movie I've seen this year, you're not in the credits. No, I'm just saying that it like, it's just, you know, it didn't just happen in Delivery Man. Like, it's... I'm pretty sure I know what you're saying. It's rampant that they don't list his name, whether he worked on it or not, that he never gets his recognition.

So, I think the Hunger Games movies are actually pretty good movies. I like them. They're a good escape from shit that troubles you. Did you ever have to ask the people in the cab, who is the host of Cash Cab? Once in a while. Once in a while.

Yeah, these guys would have known the answer. Well, I'm glad that you like those movies. I turned another corner with Mockingjay, and I'm not into him again. You liked Catching Fire? The second one was okay. I didn't like the first one at all, and then the second one got me a little more into it. Yeah, that's the same for me. And the third one ruined it.

I haven't watched the third one yet. I'll see the fourth one, though, because I'm a sucker. There's a fourth one? That's what I'm saying. Mockingjay has been divided up into two films. Oh. So, yeah, you've got a little road ahead of you. You're only halfway home.

The old double fork hole. In the story of what happens to Katniss Everdeen. Katniss Everdeen, yeah. And her friends, Smibblebee Gibbleb, and Flubblegarm Dibblesnops. Dan Soder, what about you? You been to the movies lately? I haven't been to the movies, but I watched a movie yesterday that I'm kind of ashamed to admit. Here we go.

I watched a Steven Seagal movie called Against the Dark. Yeah. I guarantee most of you motherfuckers haven't seen this. It is awful. Me and my friend tried to find the worst possible

Steven Seagal movie to watch. And we found it. It was our El Dorado of shit. Who else is in Against the Dark? The only other guy that we knew was, and I feel bad, I don't know his name, he was the stepdad in Something About Mary.

Old black dude. Oh, Keith David. Keith David. Keith David. We talking Frank Sabine, son. Yeah, he's like, oh, she left a half hour ago with Woogie. I was like, ah, it's a stepdad from...

He's the only recognizable person in that movie. From They Live. Yeah! The fight scene with Roddy Piper. I forgot about that. They knee each other in the balls like 14 times. That's the longest fight scene ever and it's amazing. But it is. It's like Stephen Seagal

was like, oh, I'm going to do Blade really terrifyingly. He's supposed to be like a vampire. He's like a supernatural. Yeah, there's like an outbreak. It's post-apocalyptic. They really could only afford three sets. It was like when Saved by the Bell just had the same room for different things.

We were like, that kitchen was from earlier in the movie. And then most of the movies, there's Steven Seagal walking down this one alleyway, like, clear the buildings. And that's just what he keeps saying. What? It's awful. It's so bad.

Play the buildings? No, clear the buildings. Kill anything that seemed like it might be dead. That's one of his lines. Yeah. There was a lot of weed smoked yesterday. It was bad. Sounds awesome.

That sounds super good. You don't get that 98 minutes back in your life. I'll tell you that. Kill anything that seems like it might be dead. Someone wrote that. I think, I'd like to think... He might have riffed it. Yeah.

He might have riffed it. That sounds like something Seagal's like, I got a good one. Just roll the cameras, I got this. And I snap this rubber band in my ponytail.

You start rolling. I heard a crazy story about Seagal that he was shooting with somebody and didn't know his lines so he just, they're doing the scene

and the other guy keeps doing his lines and Seagal doesn't say anything. So they're like, let's do it again. Same scenarios over and over and then finally

he leans to the other guy and he goes, do you know my lines? And the guy's like, yeah, I know. He goes, why don't you do yours and mine? You can say shit like that when you know a keto. Just stand there arguing with yourself before me, trembling. I'm going to look cool. He's like, that won't make any sense, Stephen.

Can't be both of us. If it was going to be chopped up, if it wasn't like Birdman or something where they needed one continuous take, they could have just had the guy do that, say Seagal's line, Seagal could just repeat it. But in the drama

of the scene. They just got to go through it. It would have to have some pace to it but I think they could pull it off let's do a remake clear these buildings clear them I would love to get that funded against the dark too

no against the dark redux redux the director's cut redux No, Against the Dark Redux. Redux. The director's cut. Redux. Yeah. I saw a remake today. I saw the 2005 version of Amityville Horror. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Really? It's a very New York thing to see you know it's got the house with the windows yeah the windows that look like eyes scary face house and

you know and the dad as Ryan Reynolds this time said of James Brolin and he grows the James Brolin beard and I don't believe that he can grow a beard James Brolin, and he grows the James Brolin beard. I don't believe that he can grow a beard. Ryan Reynolds?

It might be a pasted-on one. I'm not sure. It seemed like a little funkiness with the hair. But here's the fun little piece of trivia from that movie. The little girl, I think she's supposed to be five or six or something in that movie, is Chloe Grace Moretz, who went on to be a hit girl in the Kick-Ass movies, and also just has a pretty good career going for herself as a good actress. But it's nice to see somebody

start off little doing the most fucking horrifying shit. Her character just goes for a stroll on the roof of a house, and it's not like a roof, like a big surface to walk around on. She's walking like a like a roof like a big surface to walk around on she's like walking like you know like a tightrope walker across this one rail on the top of a roof and

she's supposed to be you know five or six years old and uh i won't give away anything more because we live in a no spoiler culture now where even a movie from 2005 is sitting in somebody's queue damn it why did you tell me of chloe moretz grace there's a they made a third didn't they like isn't george c scott one of those what's that okay i'm mixing them up what are you mumbling about another one of those george c scott no i'm mixing them up god What are you mumbling about, old man? George C. Scott? No, I'm mixing them up. Mixing them up with what?

Speak up. He mixes up George C. Scott and Chloe Grace Moretz. Which one was in Hardcore? Which one played Patton? Which one was Patton? Get them mixed up. See, I was going to say which one... You said Patton was in Kick-Ass? I was going to say which one... The Trace of the Pad was in Kick-Ass?

I was going to say which one was in Day of the Dolphin. I think they're both in that. Have you seen that movie, Doug? Day of the Dolphin? Yeah. That's a classic. Yeah. Yeah, I viewed it a bunch of times when I was a kid,

but I didn't really retain much from it, other than it was a drama about they were trying to teach the dolphins to be smart so that they could basically be kamikaze warriors and take bombs.

Without their trying to train them to be little bomb runners. Well, they were just, they trained dolphins to be smart and they trained this one to talk. This sounds like you guys were spitballing this idea. You're like, dolphins go. No, wait, wait, wait. Somebody kidnapped

the dolphin and the dolphin learns to play cards. They wanted to use the dolphin to kill the vice president of the United States. The vice president? Yeah, just the vice president. I see that a lot. The president had no appearances at an aquarium on his docket

on his schedule of events. I can't get you to the president. Now there's no one to replace the president. The president won't be believable. We'll make it about the vice president. The president is more of a manta ray job. we're making about the vice president president is more of a manta ray job okay so they

think they know a spot where the dolphins can get to the VP well the vice president was on a he was on a boat is that how Julia Louis-Dreyfus' character got promoted to president? did a dolphin kill the president? oh no, the vice president.

That's who they're going after. I apologize for the mistake. They're going to kill the vice president. I don't know how we got to where we are right now, but I'm just going to go ahead and say, let the games begin. Oh, wow. We're going to play some

games here in a second, but before we can do that, we have to determine who you guys are playing for. So let's bring up the house lights a little bit, because not all the name tags light up, but extra points to the ones that do. And

Dan and everybody else just physically get up and go grab the person you want to play for. The person you want to represent today. I hear something's making a lot of noise. Ooh, I see some candy, I think. Someone's offering food.

Alright, while they do that, we'll do this. We'll be right back. Today's episode is brought to you by our friends at zero x e r o zero's beautiful accounting software built to help small businesses be more productive and successful zero is easy to use send invoices online quotes to your customers, pay your employees, manage your cash flow, expenses, and even your inventory with Xero. Xero is in the cloud, so you can access and manage all your business accounting on the go.

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Back to the show. Okay, we're back. All right. Name tag selection is finished. Who are you playing for there, Harmar? I'm playing for Foot Lucy. We've got some really good artwork here. Oh, Foot Lucy. That's awesome. That's nice.

That's great, man. Alright, and if there's a shithead on the back, don't share it with us. We'll read that at the end if you lose tonight. Who are you playing for, Wyatt? I'm playing for Sarasic Park. And why does it also say Wyatt

on that name tag? So that I would know to get it. How did you know Wyatt would be a guest tonight? Secrets. Interesting. I didn't say anything. Is she your lover?

I didn't say anything. I don't know how. Yeah, that is now actually I'm worried this whole time I thought Ben was gonna get murdered I don't wanna open this now

your crazy fan person is right next to mine too they might have come together they're gonna wear our skin and say my name They're going to wear our skin. And say my name. Your own hand. They ride around as the super fans of different comedians ride around in super shuttles. Tracking them down at their various shows.

You guys really... That'd be a fun storyline for a movie. Two super fans who meet because they come to see I shouldn't host on Ambien listen are you doing ads? who are you playing for?

I'm playing for Brokeback Brandon. So that's me and Brandon, I guess. No, that's Mark Wahlberg. Yeah, that's actually Mark. That's me and Mark Wahlberg. Brandon's just in the title. He's not actually one of the characters. But I love how our Mark and me,

first of all, I'm glad he has a bigger head than me, but we both still have tiny heads in the middle of Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal's big heads. He's smiling your whole head. It's a very disturbing look. It looks like we're trying to come out of their faces. Like they're robots and we're inside. He looks way happier than you, too.

He looks really happy, yeah. You look kind of shocked. Yeah, yeah. What happened up on this mountain? I'm the one who gets his back broke. Well, good job there, Brandon. It's certainly large. And then it looks like there's probably a shithead on the back.

So well done. Don't say it out loud, Ben. There's nothing on the back? No writing? No? Okay. I take it back. What happened, Brandon?

Ben's probably going to win, so don't worry about it. Who are you playing for, Dan? I'm playing for the P-Terminator. Oh, that's right. We talked about it a lot when we were off during the break, but you're playing for, at first you saw Terminator, got excited, headed over. He pretty much agreed to use his name tag. Walked in full handshake.

Then saw that he put his name in there by calling himself the P-Terminator. Then I learned his name was Peter. You wanted to pass on it, but you're a good guy, and you stuck with your original choice. Wait, is it Paterminator? Is it Paterminator? Paterminator. Or is it Peter-minator?

It's Peter-minator. Peter-minator. Peter-minator. It's the Jewish Terminator. Peter-minator. Oh, sure, you know old Peter-minator. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

He lives down on Everdeen Road. Right next to Spiderman. You must be Peter-minated Peter-minated Peter-min I'm here to Peter-minate You've been Peter-minated I'm just seeing if somebody's got one more They want to eek out

Before we play a game called how much did this shit make very popular in this game I'm going to name a movie and you guys are going to tell me how much money you think it made in millions without going over, according to Box Office Mojo, in its entire domestic run. And in honor of one of my guests tonight,

I'm not going to say which one. The movie is a movie that didn't work out that well for everyone involved. And it's called Taxi. Jimmy Fallon vehicle. With Queen Latifah and a gaggle of I think it was bank robbing supermodels running around Toronto, New York

or whatever you want to call it. Anybody want to jump in with an opening bid or are you going to make me pick somebody? I'll jump in with an opening bid Or are you going to make me pick somebody I'll jump in with an opening bid Dan is in Domestic North American box office

67 million Total Dan Soder That's a car that's turned into a souped up car That's worth a little I was going to go 62 million You That's a car that's turned into a souped-up car. That's worth a little. I was going to go $62 million. You son of a bitch. Oh, Wyatt still wants that number, I guess.

Could have adjusted a little bit. I'm giving a $5 million cushion. You got a $5 million window there, cushion. Sure. $54. Ben jumps in with a $54. 54 Ben jumps in with a 54 There's a gentleman

in the audience that needs to be reminded of a few things He put on his best game show announcer voice But he did remind us of something that is important. You could bid a dollar if you want to play that way So far we got 54, 62, and $67. What do you say, Harmar?

I'm going $25 million. I don't think I'd have made that much money. Hey, the talent was hot, but the vibe was not. You just became a studio executive. Congratulations. I just got hired. Just got the call.

Sometimes the best ingredients mix up into shit. Not as nice a way of saying it, but it did not do very well, as it turns out, and that's why Harmar is our winner. Wow. It made $36.6 million. Oof. And that's why Harmar is our winner. Wow. It made $36.6 million. Oof.

In its entire run, yeah. I think they released it like Labor Day weekend or something, and it was out of theaters in a couple weeks. But fun to watch on, you know, VH1 or something. Because it's a very strange movie. They show it on taxi TV if you're in a cab late enough. They just run the whole movie? Whole movie.

Oftentimes I just take the two hour ride just to finish it out. Just follow the movie and drive to those places. Driver. You sure you want to get out? I'll turn the meter off so you can see what happens. You're going to miss the best part.

Ha ha ha, no such thing. All right, we're going to play a game called ABCD's Nuts. It's a spelling game. Who won the last game? Harmar won the last game, so he gets to go first in this one. And then we'll go to Wyatt and Ben and Dan. And it's a spelling game. We're going to spell something out using the letters.

I always have a hard time explaining this. In honor of Furious 7 and family. Family. Family is important, you guys. Most important thing. Family. Above all else, family. Let's spell

tonight Vin Diesel. The name Vin Diesel. So we're going to start with Harmar gets the letter V. He gets to name any movie in the history of motion pictures that begins with the letter V. And you can't say something that begins with

the because that begins with a T. So make sure it's just the letter V. I give you an example but we need Harmar to give us one. So any movie begins with V. But if you match the movie that I've written down

ahead of time, you win the whole game automatically. But if you can't think of one, you're out. Vanishing Point. That is a movie that begins with the letter V. I went with Van Wilder. Because I saw

Ryan Reynolds in Amityville Horror today. So I had Ryan Reynolds on the brain. I know, that's an interesting... Yeah, I thought about it. Since this game doesn't really matter, there are purists

including myself that would want to call it National Lampoon's Van Wilder, but I just wanted to bring up Van Wilder. So here we are. The next letter is the letter I. And so, Wyatt, just name any movie that begins with the letter I. Inception.

That's a great example of one. Certainly one that I could have mentioned, but I went with a film that's out right now. It's causing a bit of a stir called It Follows. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Love that one. Thought you Yeah. Love that one. Thought you might think of that one.

All right, Ben, you get the letter N. And I don't know if you guys get this, but if somebody misses, if they can't think of one, then the next person gets stuck with the letter that that person failed on. So don't get too far ahead of yourselves in spelling Vin Diesel.

Also, good luck with diesel. N is your letter. North by Northwest. The N in Vin Diesel. Okay, North by Northwest. Interesting. Yeah, I knew what was going to happen here in this situation, so I went ahead and went with National Lampoon's Van Wilder. That's fucking hilarious

Okay Dan, your movie Any movie that begins with the letter D The Desperado Oh, so close to Delivery Man How did I not do it? How did I see it? I didn't. Fuck.

We're back on. Hi, man. What do you got for... Hi. Going irreversible. What? What? Was that like

did Beyonce sing the theme song? Oh no, she was irreversible? Was she irreversible? I just totally thought that was a movie. It's a movie, right? Yeah. It is. Okay. Alright. Fair enough. I went with something I know for sure is a movie. It's a movie, right? Yeah. It is. Okay. Fair enough.

I went with something I know for sure is a movie. It's called Ice Castles. Yeah. Well, I don't believe you. You know how I love... I really like a

love skate story. And that certainly is one. E is the next letter for Wyatt. Expendables 3. Oh. Would have been a really close one there. Exciting if I had said any of the Expendables. But I did go with E.

Ex Machina. Ex Machina Ex Machina if you haven't checked it out yet it's a good movie and it's in theaters and probably VOD also right? S Ben

I'm pretty sure this is the one you're thinking of okay I love this Stop or My Mom Will Shoot oh I would totally think of that if I didn't think of this other one. That's totally the kind of movie I might think of. But I went with a movie called Sleepwalk With Me, made by our friend Mike Rabiglia, who's got a child do any minute now.

And also because Wyatt is in that movie. It's true. That is accurate. Are you credited or uncredited? Oh, he's credited. That's how I know he's in it. Yeah. You seem to know if people are uncredited as well, Doug.

Oh, that's true. Good call. I hate to point that out. Good point. You really hated it? I think it felt good. E. Exorcist. Wait, whose turn is it?

Me. Okay. Oh, boy. You hear that? Yeah, that was the most frightening reaction. I don't understand. I'm terrified right now. Someone hissed. Who the fuck hisses?

There's a lot of emotions that go through people. Jeez, I'm just trying to do like a word association game and I hit the trip wire. Isn't George Scott in that? I tried to explain it

at the beginning but it's a lot to take in but that movie's called The Exorcist. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, I'm sorry.

Yes, I know. It's unfortunate that we narrow it down to the 10,000 movies that start with the letter E and eliminate the 180,000 ones that start with the letter T. I mean, the. Yeah. So wait, is The Expendables,

is it The Expendables, or is it the Expendables? No, it's just the, wait Is it? Oh no So you're in trouble Yeah, but I was But that's part of the fun is that you just have to get it by me And the audience and he did I mean now I'm all locked up

I was going to say Expendables 1 I don't want to get hissed at again. Yeah, they never had a movie called Expendables 1. They weren't that optimistic. They weren't so cocky. Holy shit, have you guys seen It Follows 1? Trust me, it's going to work out. I heard it, yeah.

I heard some of the characters need to survive. Now I keep thinking of E ones, and I keep locking up, because I know that the... That's okay, you're already out. Okay. That's fair. That's why all the gasping. And the hissing was unnecessary.

And unnecessary hissing. Harmar. We had E? Yeah. Everafter. Thank you for reminding me. Oh! God, that was so close.

Oh, people like to say full title on this one, but I disagree. I think Everafter's enough. I think it's just Everafter, right? Well, it's some circles. It goes on. It's like the debate

over whether Die Hard 2 is called Die Harder or not. And I think it's not, because when you're watching a movie, it just says Die Hard. And when you're watching Ever After, does it say that other title? No. I don't think it does. It's on the box. And what's the other title? A Happy... Cinderella Story. A Cinderella Story. There you go. I mean, I was thinking that the whole time. That's a long to leave out. I don't know why they're quoting Bill Murray from Caddyshack in the title of a movie about a princess.

But Cinderella story. He had about five irons about 600 yards out. Bark like a dog. Come on. He got all of that one. My movie for E, so close though to Ever... What did you say?

Ever After. Ever After is Cinderella's story. I went with Everly, which is a movie that's out now, directed by past and future Douglas Movies guest Joe Lynch. It's very entertaining because what's-her-name, Selma Hayek, kills a lot of dudes. And then they made a movie about it. It's a documentary?

Yeah. L. L's. The final letter. We're going to get through this thing with nobody matching up with me possibly. It's all on. Me? Wyatt.

Yeah. The letter's L. All right. Leaving Las Vegas? That's a good one. That's the one I was thinking. If I had a gig coming up in Vegas, that might have been the one in my mind. But I went with Lost River, directed by Ryan Gosling.

Has anybody seen it? Ryan Gosling has. You won my game. No, but a woman in the second row is tickled by it. Yeah. Is it any good? No. You're right.

You actually made the dainty little fart sound that I can't replicate with my current state of cotton mouth. That kind of thing. That means there's no winner of that game.

Congratulations to everybody. You're all winners when there's no winner of that game. Congratulations to everybody. You're all winners when there's no winners. And that means that we start in the same place we started before, which was with Harmar. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. We'll change the order around this time, though.

Okay. And after you, we will come to me. Whoa. Yes, because deciding it all tonight, very excited about this, is a round

of Last Man Stanton. And I will play So if I win, it's whoever comes in second place is the person who won all the prizes for somebody with a name tag like Brokeback Brandon. You're really having trouble with that thing.

It's unwieldy. It's just that perch situation. He's feeling it too. it's just that perch situation. He's feeling it too. Yeah, if everyone I'm looking at right now, Ben is the most vulture-like in that. Sitting there, like you're in a children's theater right now and you're about to be sitting on a ridge

talking about some cowboys that are just trying to make their way west you're hoping they die so you can just pick at their uh carcasses carcassi what's a what's uh did that ever come up on cash cab what's the plural of carcass no no oddly enough we didn't have a whole lot of questions about dead bodies yes yes here's a red light challenge. What's in my trunk? What would be the technical name for the man we just ran over at this point?

Corpse. That's acceptable. Also acceptable, Bill. Carcass. Or dead guy. Only one carcass, though, in this scenario. No carcass eye. Ah, ah, okay, okay.

Probably just carcasses. Carcass? Yeah. Carcass? I think it's carcasses. Carcass. Probably just carcasses. Carcass? Yeah. Carcass? I think it's carcasses. Carcass. I like carcass. Are you still going to take me to the airport?

Did you ever do a children's edition of Cash Cab? No. Candy Cab. Candy Cab? Yeah. Candy cab. Candy cab? Hey, kid, you want to get in this car and be a winner?

Come on. You kids are going to take this taxi anyway. I'll give you a piece of candy for every correct answer. First question, can you keep a secret? You get some candy. This is some dark business right here, man. I can't really get behind this. I can appreciate the writing, but I can't get behind it. We'll put you in the credits good enough for me that's just a step in the right fucking direction

so that's your official stance is that you didn't want to be in the credits of delivery man because you knew it would be embarrassed because they're abusing children. Oh. Wow. I was just joking around, but you... It's pretty fucking funny given what that movie is about. It's about a sperm donor

who ends up having like 500 fucking kids. Never saw it. Yeah. Nobody did. I'm in it. Yeah. Nobody did. I'm in it. You should. Well, that's debatable.

No, it isn't. I'm not in it. That's the point, dummy. There's no fucking debate about it. That's a dummy. I'm sorry I called you a dummy that's fine here's how this game works thank god dummies and smarties alike need to know the rules and uh we're gonna get from person in the audience so i think i've got a person in mind just make a suggestion

actor or actress maybe a filmmaker but that's unlikely who has a large body of work and they were going to take turns naming movies that that person was involved in not as a producer that gets a little too you know difficult not difficult but just it's too much sometimes

so who knows who produced what but directing and acting count, of course. And, we'll get a name from, there's somebody that wrote to me today

on Twitter very earnestly about that they think they've got a great one for us to play tonight. And I cannot wait to belittle this person. Would they make a suggestion?

Can't be me. We've already done that. I'm always like, why don't you do a thing where you just, like, pick people up and simulate the show, Cash Cab? You know, maybe give out an occasional prize, but mostly people just pay just to have the experience.

Because I still have dreams? That's true. I guess it would feel a little... It's just, yeah. Yeah, you're right. It would do something else. But it would make me so happy. If I find out I'm dying, I'll ask you to set it up.

Dude, I'll take you for a spin in the old cash cab anytime you want. Yeah, I'd just like to, you know, just like to answer some questions. All right. Feel what it's like to, because because for those people it must have been pretty exciting i think it was you know they're just off to go somewhere in their day and they get this extra really cool thing happening while they had to sit in a cab anyway yeah right yeah what about bitcoin uber the new the new modernized cash cab. Bitcoin Uber. It's actually in the works.

Yeah, I'm sure that show's already been greenlit somewhere. I'm hosting one on an airplane. There's only two parachutes. Cash crash? Crash cab. Cash cab in the sky uh where is beacon xdr oh right here see in the audience as promised looking confident thinks he's got a good one remember don't don't amy adams this shit, you guys. If you know the answer in the audience, just wait. Or if you know a answer, wait till the end.

Guys on stage, make sure we all take our turns. Good luck to everyone. Who should we play with? I actually wanted Vince Vaughn. He wants Vince Vaughn. All right. All right. All right.

We'll see what happens. It's good. It's good for me. I think I've played Vince Vaughn before. I'm going to be tough to beat, gentlemen. I'll tell you that right now. Harmar, though, he knows his movies. He knows his Vince Vaughns.

I'm going old school. Okay. What's the title? Let's hear it. How far back are you going to go? How old school is your answer going to be? Okay, I'm going to go ahead and say delivery man. Dan? I'm up.

Clay pigeons. Oh, wow. You did go old school. That's a tricky one. Ben Bailey. Be cool. I'm trying my best. But then you keep mentioning that

pile of garbage. Wedding Crashers? Yes. Yes. Fight swingers. Okay, you guys. I'm serious about this. I'm not messing around.

Made. Dodgeball. Okay, now you've really got yourself into a bit of trouble here. True underdog story? Yes! Suck it! Dick!

Dick! Talk it! Fuck yeah! I believe in the power of this podcast! Oh, that felt so good. That was like the power of this podcast. Oh, that felt so good. That was like the opposite of a hiss. Thank you for that. All right.

Is that acceptable, Doug? Dodgeball. Yeah, you got it in. We were going to have a conversation. Doug. I was going to give you a chance to come up with it, but I'm glad you knew it. Because it's always very sad when a person's sitting there saying, oh, I didn't know. That I would have to know all of the title.

Ben. Yeah. Is it your turn? No, wait, which way are we going? Yeah, it's your turn. Oh, your turn. I thought I just went. I know, it did feel that way, didn't it?

It's a looper joke. I said, man. I'm afraid I've taken care of this already, Doug. To you, what? When I was a younger man, I answered. Oh. When I wore a younger man's nose. Oh, for fuck's sake.

I can't think of another goddamn Vince Vaughn movie. Like Joseph Gordon-Levitt had to have a Bruce Willis nose and not the other way around. Vince Vaughn, man. He's in everything. I just saw him in a trailer for a thing. Oh, yeah? Looks pretty good. It's season two of a little TV show called True Detective. Doesn't count for our purposes, of course.

Sure it doesn't. I'm not going to mention any titles that do count. Let me just double check. Yes, according to my figures, you're the one who said Clay Pigeons. Oh, you did. Dan did. Okay, so I take that back. Yeah, that was me. No, Dan said it.

So I'll give Dan a hard time if he can't think of another one after Clay Pigeons. Because that was a tough pull. How about you? You got nothing like a clay pigeon. The cell. What? The cell. Oh yeah.

There you go. Wow. Wow. You were really cool as a cucumber on that one. You, you really, you do know how to be cool. Wyatt. Anchorman. The legend of Ron Burgundy. Yes. cool. Wyatt?

Anchorman, the legend of Ron Burgundy. Yes. He was cameoing in the fight sequence. Wes Mantooth. Was from the other station, yes. Now does that rule out... Yeah, I know what you were gonna ask.

Don't bother saying it out loud. Yeah, no, I won't. Thank you. Harmar. I waited a couple times through because I'm in this one, but it was Starsky and Hutch. That's right. I just didn't want to take the glory right away, you guys.

Look at me. What's your character's name in that? Dancing Rick. Dancing Rick. Dancing Rick, yes. I show up and I dance. Say some stuff. How long do you have to dance around for?

In reality? In the whole, like, the filming-wise? Like, how much do you see in the movie? Oh, it's like a few minutes. It's like me and Ben Stiller going head-to-head pretty hardcore for a long time. We had to film for, like, 12 hours a day for, like, three days or something. A lot of dancing. He had to learn a lot of moves that he probably was completely unfamiliar with.

Well, yeah, we met up in, like, a dance studio and, and like actually worked it out together with a choreographer I had a bunch of my own moves he had some of his own moves he did? yeah yeah he had some good he had some sweet moves and then he was like

we gotta do this all the time we should rent a dance studio and just like you know fucking dance around and I was like totally wow never happened

come on man never got that call. That's funny, because whenever I go to L.A. You're always dancing around. I go to Ben Stiller's L.A. dance studio party. His secret dance studio. Everybody's there. Everybody.

All of Hollywood's there. And we're all just rocking out to Blondie. Holy shit, man. I was there, but I wasn't credited. I was there, but I wasn't credited. I'm going to go with, because it's my turn, right? Yeah. Mr. and Mrs. Smith.

Oh, yeah. I'm going to go with Psycho. Damn it. Oh. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. It's hard sometimes to know, but I'm going to guess in that case they were clapping for your prowess and picking that movie and not for the movie itself. Horrible movie. Yeah, you could hear that.

You could hear that in there. Yeah. What was that one? Four Christmases? Oh, shit. Going to a dark age of the Vaughn era. Oh, okay. I got another one.

I guess I'll go with Anchorman 2, The Legend Continues. Since I teased it up the last time. No, that one was just hanging out there, but people get scared they can't. I was worried I'd muck the title up somehow. Har-muck-a-bop. Check this out.

I believe this was in theaters. Vince Vaughn's Wild West Comedy Tour. Oh! I was holding on to that one. I was holding that one in my pocket. I'm sorry, man. I'm sorry. I'm on a tightrope now, man. That was in some theaters. That's true.

That did happen. You know what else happened? A little ditty called... The Lost World Jurassic Park. Oh! Yeah. All that Ben Stiller talk made me think of Zoolander. Oh, yeah.

Plays the brother. Plays one of the brothers. Yeah, Judah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's right. Mm-hmm. This is getting tough, right?

Couples Retreat. Oh! You are all up on the rom-coms. Shit. Shit. He's got the market cornered. Quiet. This one I'm going to go with because I only know of it because my friend Asif Manvi was in it.

It's a little movie called The Internship. That's right. Trying to think of that one. Asif is very good in it, but I cannot see the word Google or hear somebody say the word Google without hearing him say the word Google. Because he was like a very serious guy at Google that was in charge of training all the interns. And he'd always go, here at Google. Google. Google.

And sometimes he'd be mad at somebody and be like, that's not how we do things at Google. And it's just a weird word to yell at somebody. But he's really good at it. He's good at being like the, you know, he's the Lou Gossett Jr. character. He has to whip them into shape with his tough love drill instructor tactics. And you could say I'm stalling,

but it's Harmar's turn. Okay, I believe Vince Vaughn had a small part in Rudy. Yeah! Oh, fuck, yeah. Yeah, good job on that one. Nice, nice pullage.

I want to say he's had quite a run. Fred Claus, motherfuckers! I'm seeing how next to me right now this man's dominated with rom-coms. I gotta get one in. The Breakup. Yes, of course. The Breakup.

Top five for me. What are you going to do with that, Ben? Pretend I don't know it's my turn. This is really, this is an interesting one. All of us are still in. And what else could Vince Vaughn have possibly done? Oh, I got another one! Ben, I'm going to have to put you on a clock. All right.

Do you have any ideas running through your head? I know I've got another one in there. Thinking of one that you just can't think of the title for it or something? No, I had a couple more, and you guys just fucking said them both. Oh, yeah, those ones. You can't. You've got to think of ones that haven't been said. What did you say?

It's crucial to think of ones that haven't been said yet. But you hadn't said them when I thought of them. And then you did after. I just unremembered one. I had to do some pacing. to you now just made me forget one I had a good one I forgot it so good luck to me when it gets back around

son of a whore oh I got it back again okay so Ben's out thanks for trying Ben Oh, I got it back again. Okay, so Ben's out. Thanks for trying, Ben. Sorry, broke back, Brandon. Wyatt. I can't think of the name of it.

No, I know, you're out. That's what I just said. Thanks for not giving a shit at all, Doug. I do... This is like... One more time. Alright, you're back in. Just kidding. Just kidding.

Wyatt. Do I have time to go to the bar? And while I do that, think. That's a good place to think. Like when you're watching Jeopardy, sometimes they run to the bar to think for a while. Yeah. Did he do a voice in Rango or something like that?

That's a fun guess. I just reached. I went for a wild reach because it was either going to be that or Tyler Perry's Madea goes to jail. And I assume that none of you have seen it, so I figured

I could have just coasted. Sneaky way to slide that one in. Oh, look at this. Somebody's getting a beverage. That's very nice of you. All right. Thank you very much. Playing favorites yet again at the Gramercy Theater.

Make some noise for the folks here at the Gramercy Tavern. Harmar, you got another one? Man, okay. So for some reason in my brain, I feel like there has to be some appearance of Vince Vaughn in Elf just to whet his passion to do Fred Claus. So I'm going to go with Elf, and I'm wrong. I'm probably wrong, right?

Yeah, I don't think he was in Elf. No. Fuck. Why did my brain make me think that? I don't know. I don't think it's all stand-up. But if I ever take a picture with Will Ferrell, I'm definitely going to say I took an Elfie.

It's on me, right? Yeah. Are you still in, Dan? Yeah. Dan's still in. Okay. So I thought of and unthought of and then rethought of that Vince Vaughn appears for a while in a movie called Into the Wild.

Okay. All right. And I got to push it back onto you, thinking of a little movie called Neighborhood Watch. Oh! Ew! What's up, motherfuckers? Yeah, that got pulled from the theaters because Zimmerman's a murderer. Wrong tile?

The watch. I readjusted. Alright, let me see if I can think of another one here real quick. Didn't Dan already win? No, I just won. But if you win, then Dan wins. The neighborhood watch was wrong. It was so exciting that he thought of another one.

Wait. And it was called Neighborhood Watch initially. And then they changed the title to The Watch after the Trayvon Martin scam. So I think I still won. Going original. I'm sorry, but technically You're not an elf! Wait a minute! Technically, Doug... You're an elf!

Wait a second. He was an elf? He was standing up. He was not. He was not an elf. I don't know why you're just announcing that like it's big news. The British are not coming!

Just take that one. Just to let you guys know. Wow, she stood up with such purpose just to make a point in the movie of her life this was the big courtroom scene where she stood up fucking set everybody straight

Doug did we not all just get out on the same turn and so we're all kind of still in he's been standing the whole time I'm trying to think of one more just to rub it in. But I'm having trouble because I think we did a really good job. I know there's still a few more.

Just give me a second. Is it officially over? Well, you could say another one if you want. I can't think of the name of it. It's like the affair one with Kevin James. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The dilemma. The dilemma. The dilemma.

Son of a bitch. It's the dilemma of Cinderella story, isn't it? The one I couldn't think of is what's the one, you guys can say, what's the one with Claire Danes where she's in prison and he helps her? Return to Paradise. No. No, it's like the... What was that one? Broke Down

Palace. Returnke Down Palace. Return to Paradise. Return to Paradise. Unfinished Business just came out two seconds ago. I also just looked it up, and he was in For the Boys, but you'll appreciate this. He was uncredited. It could happen to anybody. Boys, but you'll appreciate this. He was uncredited. Oh, yes. It could happen to anybody.

I think that makes me tonight's winner. I think. I feel like it. That's fucking awesome. No, tonight's actual winner. Probably late for the table read. The actual winner is Dan, right? Dan won? Dan won.

Pete Terminator, you prevailed, buddy. Come get that pile of stuff. Congratulations. Technically, that means we both won. You can have his name prevailed, buddy. Come get that pile of stuff. Technically, that means we both won. You can have his name tag back, too. Are you going to read? I think he's got the thing. No, he doesn't get his shithead read because he wins all the stuff. Where's the brokeback

guy? We need a shithead for him here at the end. Oh, Peter. He was way up in the balcony, the brokeback guy? Just yell out, who do you want me up in the balcony, the Brokeback guy? Alright, just yell out who do you want me to call a shithead Brokeback Brandon? Okay, we got it. Oh, it is on here.

I thought I asked you if there's something on the back. You looked right at it and said, no, there isn't. Yes, because I'm an actor, Doug. But it's okay to say yes, there's something there, but I'm not going to say what it says yet. I got one in mind. You are a good actor, by the way.

What's that? I got one in mind, too. Inside, yeah. Yeah, that's how it's supposed to go. I didn't... There's chocolates in there as well. And chocolates, too. And what do you got, Harmar?

I got this here. You want to read it for me? Yeah, yeah. You got any plugs? You know, I'm just making a new album, so I'm sort of chilling. I'm going to be... Thanks. Does it have a name, or is it too early to read it for me? Yeah, yeah. You got any plugs? You know, I'm just making a new album, so I'm sort of chilling. I'm going to be... Thanks.

Does it have a name, or is it too early to name it? It's way too early, but yeah. Okay. I'll be doing Wits, the show in Minneapolis on NPR, and a few shows around New York and Minneapolis. So wait, if you're just chilling, doesn't that mean you have time to start your podcast back up? Oh, yeah.

No, I'm far too lazy now to do that. Jesus, I got so used to not doing it that i love it yeah podcasting really cuts into your chilling time i've found and uh all right so yeah i got wait i got three shitheads yeah i got three uh why what do you got uh coming up for people to uh for? Well, I got a special that came out at the end of last year on Netflix. If you have Netflix, you can watch that. And so then I've just sort of been on the road. I've just been on the road for that. And that's about it. Several albums on the good old iTunes?

No, just one on iTunes. The other one's a vinyl record that only 999 people can have. Plus Pete Terminator. Ben, what about you? I have a new special coming out called Will the Real Ben Bailey Please Stand Up? But I...

They loved it. It almost feels like this whole episode was just a whole plug for that. It was a vehicle. What's my name? Oh my God. That was crazy. I'll be at a place called building 24 live, a theater in Wyoming, Pennsylvania.

That's really a place. On May 16th, I'll be at the Stanhope House in Stanhope, New Jersey on May 22nd. Is that Doug Stanhope's house? Yeah, we're just hanging over at Stanhope's house. We're going to trip our faces off. Then a place called McCurdy's Comedy Club in Sarasota, Florida

July 17th and 18th. Alright. We'll put this on you so you can finally go on The Price is Right. Thank you. That's great. Thank you.

Brokeback Brandon, by the way, said did we say what he said? Yeah, I got it. I got it all under control, Ben. Sorry, I was just trying to help out. Plus, I want to make sure everyone heard that he wanted to say that Chris Christie... No, no, I got it, buddy.

Is a fat fucking shit. His words, not mine. He's my public enemy number one, to be honest with you. So it's not going to be hard for me to say. But no, I just put the name tag down so that he could, Brokeback Brandon can get his beautiful poster back. That's great. Yeah.

Why did you have a Brokeback Mountain poster anyway? Why not? And why isn't Peter coming again in his stuff? He doesn't want it? He took off. He took off. All right. He just wants to relish in it.

Yeah. All right. Because people are going to rush the stage and take your shit, dude. Oh, he dares them to do it. Don't fuck with the P-Terminator. Let's take our stuff back. Let's say we take it all back. I dare them.

Nothing would make me happier right now than to say the contents of the prize bag belong to whoever gets to them first. Here we go. No, I'm kidding. Harmar's going for it. I just want that cheese basket. Did someone tweet to me that their name tag involved donuts?

There were donuts in the third or fourth row. I saw donuts. Where are the donuts at? There's some Ferrero Rocher. Some guy in the balcony told me about donuts, actually. So I was walking by, he was like, there's donuts over there, by the way. Dan, what kind of plugs you got? I'll be at Helium in Portland in May,

and I'll also be at the Comedy Club in Rochester, New York. So if you're in those cities. and I'll also be at the comedy club in Rochester, New York. So if you're in those cities. Dan, have you ever had the chance to just take a nice, pretty, new, colorful donut and just hurl it as hard as you can into a crowd of people? Dude, seriously? Yeah. This is the fucking best.

Watch your faces, everybody. Oh, shit. Put some stank on that one. That was fucking awesome. Oh, nice. There's two left. Nice hop and a snag. There's one chewed up one left in there if you want to throw that at somebody.

Oh, that's a movement on it, Bailey. Oh, my God. movement on it, Bailey. Oh, my God. That's so much fun. Dude, if you're sitting in one section, you have four donuts here. That's awesome. There it is. Scatter bomb. One more time for all my guests.

Harmar, superstar. Wyatt Senak, Ben Bailey, Dan Soder, Doug Benson. Doug Benson. Thank you. As always, Chris Christie is a shithead, of course.

I don't know what's behind either of these things so I'm just going to say them and hope they don't get me into any kind of personal trouble Beneful Poisoning Dogs is a shithead yeah this sounds like a hot issue that I should know more about before I go run in my yap

and this one's really weird I think more about before I go run in my yap. And this one's really weird I think. MC Andrews is a shithead? Oh, Marty McAndrews. I thought there was a person, isn't there, what was the name of the person who wrote the book about the kids with the incest?

He's an idiot. Well that guy's a shithead, too. But Marty McAndrews is a shithead. Once again, we'd like to thank our sponsor, Xero. X-E-R-O. Beautiful accounting software built to help small businesses be more productive and successful. Sign up for a free 30-day trial today at Xero.com. Beautiful accounting software built to help small businesses be more productive and successful. Sign up for a free 30-day trial today at XERO.com slash podcasts.

Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie. Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky. There's no room in his heart for you. Cause Doug loves movies.