Doughboys - Burger King 4 with Don't Stop Or We'll Die

Episode Date: November 19, 2020

Michael Cassady & Paul Rust (Don't Stop or We'll Die, SONG-A-WEEK) join the 'boys for an episode free of all silliness and a revisit of Burger King. Plus, another edition of Jingle All The Whey.Sources for this week's intro:https://www.smh.com.au/national/jack-not-so-hungry-for-burger-king-20020425-gdf84v.htmlhttps://www.smh.com.au/business/burger-king-slips-into-hungry-jacks-uniform-20030602-gdguzj.htmlhttps://www.bizjournals.com/southflorida/stories/2003/05/26/daily36.htmlhttps://mashable.com/2016/01/22/american-chains-australia-struggled/https://www.thebalancesmb.com/us-retail-chains-in-australia-2892913https://www.hungryjacks.com.au/about-hj-sAdvertise on Doughboys via Gumball.fmWant more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In 1968, Australia was transformed forever by an American invasion. Not troops, but the arrival of fast food chains, which may have ultimately proved more detrimental to Aussie lifespans. And while US mainstays like McDonald's, KFC, and Pizza Hut were able to establish Australian outposts that retained their branding, the second biggest hamburger chain in the country and now the world was shut out due to a trademark dispute with an existing eatery in the city of Adelaide, and so had to discard its regal name and adopt a new moniker. That new brand, borrowed from a pancake mix owned by its then-parent company Pillsbury,

was, and remains to this day, as Hungry Jacks. And despite this copyright hiccup, Hungry Jacks would thrive in the land down under, introducing its American forebearer's signature whopper to Hungry Aussies. And when fellow American McDonald's runner-up Wendy's flopped, Hungry Jacks would even acquire its real estate holdings and convert them into additional HJ locations. But over time, its US parent company was not content to watch its wholly owned subsidiary thrive from afar under a different name, even though the logo, menu, and tagline were effectively the same.

And in 1991, it attempted to sever its franchising agreement with Hungry Jacks. And then, after the trademark for the aforementioned Adelaide establishment lapsed, the US parent company entered the Australian market directly, opening restaurants under its original Royal Ground Beef Sandwich name, leading to the bizarre capitalistic situation of a company effectively competing against itself and subsequently suing itself in what would prove to be a landmark case in the Australian legal system. Ultimately, Australian courts ruled in favor of Hungry Jacks, establishing that its American parent was not acting in good faith and enshrining that very concept into Australian contract

law. And so, the US brand's new outposts were reabsorbed by the Australian franchisee. Today, the parent company has nearly 18,000 locations worldwide, 400 of which reside in the Commonwealth of Australia, where, its legal disputes resolved, the chain continues to be known as Hungry Jacks. This week on Doughboys, we return, once again, to Burger King. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weiger, along with my co-host, Honey Bunches of Oaf, the Night Spoon Mike Mitchell.

I won't stand for that. You won't stand for that, that's where someone's crossed the line. You can call me fat, you can call me lazy, but an Oaf? I won't take it, Wigs. Well take it up with Anthony P at Bubbalicious47, who wrote in, I don't even think this roast is particularly good, but it would be fun to hear Weiger say out loud, eat, drink, and be merry. Hey, there you go.

Alright, he likes... We'll take Matthews. Fucking, I'm Anthony P, I gotta fucking, I gotta, oh my, I'm gonna hit him with this roast. You're just inferring he's Italian from the name Anthony? Yeah. Sounds like a, hey, sounds like a dumb Italian if you ask me. Wow, wow, Mitch.

Broadside of the Italian American community. Those marinara stained dipshits. Coming hard at the spaghetti strainers. He likes Dave Matthews, I like him. Roastpoonmanageemail.com, any riled up Italians out there who want to take out your frustrations on the night spoon, send them in, roastpoonmanageemail.com, Mitch, not Italian, but New England, a New England chain, I know a place that you know and one that Emma knows as well, our producer Emma Erdbrink, Friendly's has filed for bankruptcy and has put itself up for sale now.

You and I know that we've been around the block with these bankruptcies, bankruptcy for a chain restaurant does not mean that it's necessarily going away, but it's in all likelihood going to be sold to like one of these fucking private equity, you know, megaliths, probably sold from the private equity megalith that currently owns it to a different one and then, you know, have some locations contracted or whatever. Friendly's. Hope, I just hope they stay alive in some way. I want to fribble wigs.

Are you worried that the new owner will rebrand it as unfriendly's? Yeah, you know what? After today, maybe that's what former President Trump does. Wow. Mitch, so you've pointed out that we are recording on November 3rd, 2020 Election Day. As of just schedule wise, it worked out that this has ended up being a thing that's on Election Day and isn't going to be released for a couple of weeks, so you're calling it. You're saying former President Trump, you're saying the man that I refer to as the orange

buffoon has been excised from the White House. The American electorate has said to the man who popularized the phrase, you, sir, are fired. Oh man, what a day that will be. What a day that would be. Well, today is the day. What a day this will be. When Biden gets to say you're fired.

You know what, Wigs? Yes. I know that all the former Presidents are here to support Joe Biden. Right. Yeah, you know what? That's actually a thing we arranged special for Election Day. We've got some former Presidents here. Yeah, maybe I'll wait a second and we'll introduce our guests before we hear from all the Presidents.

Now you said all the Presidents. So we can infer that there's more than one. Uh-huh. Oh wow, very exciting. We can introduce our guests, Mitch, and we're very, very excited to have them to our favorites. I know what you're waiting for. How the hell? Displeanation.

And here is a little drop, Wigs. Here we go. I hope it's presidential. Wigs, what if I want to say come? What if I want to say come? Wigs. Come, come, come, come, come, come. Oh yeah, you know I love to come, come, come.

Wait, wait, wait. I never said come in the whole song. Hey boys, big fan of the podcast even though I don't really care for the two hosts, Mitch and Weigar. JK, love you guys. Here's a drop I made with some tips on what to do if you want to say come while your mom is home. Cheers, Pat S. from Chicago.

My mother is upstairs napping, so I can say wow. So I don't have to say come at a very quiet level. Say it with confidence. Say it full volume then. Come. Thanks, Pat S. from Chicago. Let me guess the S and Pat S stands for spaghetti. Yeah, fucking all these fucking Italian meatheads that listen to the podcast.

There's an olive oil stain in his email. Hey, wait, Weigar, before we introduce our guests, I think we should let them know about something we're putting into effect today. We should say we should have the disclaimer and then introduce them. That actually might set a good tone. Yes, okay. Well, we're recording on election day and we're recording not at our usual time. As such, we're under a little bit of a weird time crunch here, Mitch, you have a limited

window. That's not true. I thought there was a justification for this. No, I said I'll go as long as we go. Well, sure. Yes, but to the guests now. It's fine. I don't want them to think that there's a window.

Okay. All right. Fine. Well, we'll dispense of this fiction. Okay. You and I just know that these episodes can sometimes get a little haywire and go a little baddie, if you will. That's right.

With these guests in particular. And so we have established a rule because of the circumstances. Uh-oh. Someone's breaking the rule already. I'm not going to say who. No, without even hearing what it is and perhaps giving us the reason for the rule. His jaw will hit the floor when he hears this rule. Simply, the rule is this.

Can I say it, Wags? Yes, please. A silly fee. That's right. There shall be no silliness today, lest you be hit with a silly fee and have to put a silly dollar in the silly jar. And then the total, this is what Wags said, the total sum will be donated to the loser of today's election.

In the spirit of good sportsmanship. That was Wags' rule that he came up with. What should the silly jar be? Should be something silly. Yeah. Yeah. Something sussical. A monkey's butt.

Yeah, a monkey's butt. Okay. You have to put a silly dollar and a silly dollar is a dime. So you have to put a dime in a monkey's butt if you're silly today. So don't be silly. Don't be silly. I hope our guests are aware. I think the rule is being mutely broken, but perhaps when we introduce them, they'll behave.

I think that this person, I think that this guest, I think he's actually just very mad at this rule. I don't think that he's... Oh, he might be livid. He might be... I think it's genuine anger. He might be enraged. Well, you know, perhaps his blood is boiling because he has some Italian-American heritage.

Perhaps his blood is boiling much like a six quart vat of pasta with some lasagna noodles in it. Our guests today, today comprise a power pop band known as Don't Stop or We'll Die. Returning to the show, two of our favorites, Michael Daniel Cassidy and Paul Rust. What's up, dudes? Oh, hey, guys. Hey. Look, I couldn't agree more.

Mike, I think you'll agree with me. We don't want to be silly, and silly or not, we were coming in here in full mode of solemn seriousness. Wow. Oh, that's great. We both really wanted to emphasize how, you know, serious we can be. Oh. Wow.

All right. Zero sillies for the boys. This is what we like. This is great. This is kind of... This is the energy we want. This is what we want. I think you did accidentally incentivize it with changing it to putting a diamond to a

monkey's butt. Zero percent sillies for the boys. We couldn't do it. Oh, boy. We couldn't do it. Oh, man. Clean, clang, chaching, there goes the dimes, and the monkeys butt. There you go.

There you go, monkey number one. You better line these monkeys up, because I got a roll of dimes, and it's coming to the time where we put it on. Mike, don't start singing our first hit single. Roll of dimes. Wagner, are these... So, is it a jar shaped like a monkey's butt or is it an actual monkey? They were putting it down.

That's a great question. I was picturing a jar shaped like a monkey's butt, but it seemed to be implying an actual monkey that was bent over, and you were depositing them in those butt like a coin bank, which is a possibility. I mean, what's the sillier option, I guess? Well, look, you know, I love the idea of a silly jar, but it's not like with a cursed jar, you put it in a jar that's shaped fuck. That's true.

That's a good point. I will say it's a conventional jar. The monkey's butt is out the window, a conventional jar just to sort of emphasize the seriousness of this. Put a fuck dollar in the shit jar. Yes, yes, in the spirit of seriousness. I think it should be an actual monkey, because then you're going to not want to be silly because the monkey could rip your face or genitals off.

That's true. Yeah, that's where I went to, yeah. Yeah. They don't like it. Yeah, that's a dangerous situation. You can take any part of me, but those two parts, and I'm cool with it, but my face, I'm just going to tell you, thank you. So yeah, I don't know, I guess I wasn't necessarily picturing live monkeys, but I think it's more

silly to have a silly jar shaped like an animal than if it's a real monkey, that's almost less silly. So I don't know, we should probably dedicate 20 minutes or so to it. That's depraved. It's depraved, yeah, exactly. It's inhuman. It's inhuman. It's absolutely monstrous.

That's what we're trying to get away from. It's absolutely monstrous. Okay, great, the silly jar is almost full. She blinded me with a little bit of molecules. Okay, pushing the silly, going to pull back on the silly, keep it vanilla. Guys, it's great to see you. It's great to see you guys. Yeah.

Oh my gosh, so good to see you guys. Thanks for having us. And thank you so much for having us. What a delight, what a delight to have you guys. Our first lockdown episode, the final episode of the Tournament of Champiens, Munch Madness 2020, our McDonald's Tournament, we, was the two of you guys, where we anointed fries as the winner of this year's championship, but this is our first lockdown episode. It's six months later, six months and change later, and we're still locked down.

Who would have thought it? We thought we were locked down for 15, 30 days, where it's been fucking eight months, seven months, six months, however long it's been. Yeah, man. It's wild. It's wild. Seven months. But it feels like almost like a chapter is being turned, you know.

I can see like a big storybook, and a giant page is flipping over. Right. And a big finger is reaching in and going. And one page, we barely can see the top of the next page. That's where we are. Also, I love as this page is being turned, it's roughly I think like 3.30 right now in Pacific coast time. The clock's just changed.

So I like the idea that we might be getting first Florida results in while discussing snack or whack. Oh boy, that would be a brisk pace to the show because snack or whack generally comes in the third act. I'm happy. Hey, Trump just won Florida, and I'll go snack on. Hey, Wags. Yes.

I want to say there's a song, Rapper's Delight. Well, today is a podcast delight. Okay. That's good. Podcasters Delight? Oh God. You said it was a delight to have these guys here, and I said like the song Rapper's Delight. Oh, you know what it was?

I thought you were going to say either podcasters delight or actually what I thought you were going to do was going to go in an angle where it's like candy wrappers delight. That's what I thought. Yeah, me too. Or because you have the lettuce wrap, like it's time for the lettuce wrappers delight. No. Now that that's been brought up, I guess we owe that. No.

Yeah, we owe that. We owe that later. After the Presidents. Put it in the silly jar. Yeah, that's what I was going to say. The thing we owe is the former Presidents here to congratulate Joe Biden. Here's the thing, Mitch. All the former Presidents alive and dead.

Before the Presidents show up, I'll pay Mitch a compliment. The reason we thought that, Mitch, the candy wrappers thing is because you have such a high bar, a precedent of stellar material. We were just all assuming. Well, I was, it was sincere with podcast delight. This is a delight to have you all here. It's a delight for us. And I agree.

Congratulations on election day. It's me, Richard Nixon. Wow, President, former President Nixon. Thank you for introducing yourself. It was helpful. I'm giving the peace sign right now with both hands. You are indeed. But still somehow you're holding onto your mic.

I suppose I should introduce myself. Nancy. Wow. My friend. I'm holding two handfuls of marbles. That's right. Well. Okay.

Yeah. President Ronald Reagan. While Ronald Reagan and Richard Nixon. An honor to meet you both. Two transformative conservative Republicans. Really our current political climate is owed largely the two of you. How fitting that these two former Californian Republicans would be here at our California footsteps.

And I was. Yeah, very fitting. I'm not a crook, but Donald Trump sure is. Wow. Skating. Wow. Richard Nixon. And hey, I don't think you should forget about me.

President Barack Obama. Oh, yeah, we can't forget about you. This is such an honor to have these three presidents here on this Zoom call. Love them or hate them. It's an honor to meet all of you right now. Yeah, I do want to say with those words, President Nixon, welcome to the resistance. It's great to have you aboard. Hey, am I Bay now?

Nixon is Bay. Hi. Can I just pick up here for a minute? Yes, of course. It's a me, a Jimmy Carter. President Carter. Wow. What an honor.

And as well as my Republican friend, Richard Nixon, is putting down a President Trump. I would like to say Jimmy Carter fully supports President Trump. Oh my goodness. This is a shock. Yes, man. President Carter, you endorsed Bernie Sanders. It seems like this is against everything that you have worked your entire political career for.

And it's me, Obama, once again. And I just want to say that I too support President Trump. Wow. You've been campaigning for Joe Biden. I mean, I guess is that just out of allegiance because he's your friend? For me, it was just fun to hit that basketball shot in the gym that you all saw. That was very cool. That video was really cool.

We're definitely all thinking about it too on November 19th. Hillary and I loved watching that basketball shot. Oh, yeah. Wow. There he is. That's right. That's right. Big Mac.

I wanted to, you know, that'd be like me coming through the gym and someone throws me a tennis saxophone. Wait a minute. If you're Bill Clinton, then there's this other guy who usually comes on the show and says he's Bill Clinton. No. Who's this? Who's this guy been?

Now, wait a minute. It's me. Hey there. There's two people. I'm more the Dave. Yeah. I'm an impressionist that gets called in when he gets COVID. I kept him around for when I'm sick.

That makes sense. That explains my accent. And sometimes when it's time to make love to Hillary, I push him in the room. Oh boy. Well, it's an honor to have all of you here, but I will say that we have some very important business to attend to, which is... Okay, bye. They all just left it.

A portal to hell opened. They all went into it. Including Carter. I was shocked. And Obama. It's because I planted peanuts. Don't plant peanuts. You give your soul over to Satan when you plant the peanuts.

Wow. Man, that, it was like a maw, like gobbled them up and two jaws shut, closed over them. Two jaws of earth and molten. And all that's left is a single hot peanut. We gotta plant it. Guys, we have to plant it. You know, don't bless the lesson of Carter is don't plant it. I mean, I love a hot peanut, but I didn't want to get one this way.

All right, put a dime in the monkeys, but you guys got to do a little sound pad thing that when it goes into the thing goes. How much will that cost to do a monkey sound? How much will it cost? Yeah, we bought that from like a library or something. I can find that for free. All right, good. I have my own libraries.

It's okay. I have my own monkeys too. It's fine. I have a feeling it's going to cost us $50 every time we use the monkey, the monkey holler. What do you think? Well, you have to pay me $50 every time we use it. Wow. Wow.

Wow. She named her price fair and square. I wanted to ask the both of you because, you know, we were locked, we were in the early part of lockdown, we recorded our previous episode. Now we're, we've been in lockdown for a long time. You're both, you're both family men. You've got kids you're taking care of. How was, what has been your fast food consumption during COVID?

Hey, Paul and Cassidy, you guys are a lot like me. Wow, Peter Griffin. That's right. I'm voting for Biden myself. President Peter Griffin. That's right. If you ever watch Family Guy, I'm sure that I became president one time. Probably happened in a later season.

Yeah. Let me guess. They had to bring in carpenters to extend the oval office. And I was secretary of defense. Stewie. Smaller than Trump. Oh my God. That's what you would, you would have that role, Stewie.

Very war like, very much like past secretary defenses. Like Donald Rumsfeld. That makes sense. All right. What the hell? Goodbye, everyone. Oh yeah. Wow.

The earth opened up for one more, one more soul. You left another peanut. This one's freezing cold. I love freezing cold peanuts, but I didn't want one that way. All right. Another dime into the monkey's butt, Paul. That was serious. I said it's serious.

You can take the dime back out. Yeah, you can take it out of the butt. Oh, he sucked it out of the perfectly. No, that was the sound effect. That wasn't me. All right, Emma. Okay. You got to put the sound in reverse.

I don't know how much that's going to cost us, but you got to put it in reverse. There's a reverse fee of 20 bucks. Wow. Wow. It's a bargain versus a normal fee. Yeah, let's just buy them reversed. There'll be 20 bucks a pop. We'll reverse them ourselves.

Guys, what has been your fast food consumption like during quarantine? Have you been eating a lot of it? Have you been eating less of it? Talk us through it. I've been eating more. I moved during this time, which I wouldn't recommend, but it was like anytime that I move, I eat more fast food. Just like when you're not moved into your new place or you're in transition mode,

I feel like that's when I eat it the most. That's been mixed with too much delivery, lots of food delivery, too much. I hear you, Mike. What have you been your go-tos? I have been going to McDonald's more than anywhere else. Wow. For this, are we supposed to not say what it is? I went to this place.

I ate there multiple times, which is just a sign of where I'm at because I was like, now I need a nice coffee. I'll drive through again and get some other whatever, try some other stuff. You're not alone on that. I can at least say from my own experience in terms of multiple trips to this week's chain. Paul, what were you going to say? How has your fast food consumption been? I was just going to agree with Mike that whether it's moving or if you're just traveling,

you're on the road vacationing or in quarantine, I'm sure having very familiar things that you can count on, reoccurring no matter what in any given stitch, that's a nice gift to be given. Right. Totally. As I'm thinking of it, not to get too sincere, but when I went through the drive-through for our place today, oh my gosh, my heart swelled with the people who are working right now at fast food.

I know you guys talk about it, but it was just like, they're doing really kind things. That's a big thing. Anyway. All right, Paul. Another diamond in the monkey's butt. Mitch? Yes, don't be so ridiculous. Your view?

I hear you about that. It's a skew. My view is a little... People must be leaning on it more. If I'm eating it this much, the people who always eat it are probably eating it more, and they must be overworked more than ever. Yeah, and I think also a lot of people have less income or less money to spend on food because our government hasn't helped people at all, really.

That usually results in more fast food consumption. It's kind of like a lot of what's happening right now is that all these independent restaurants are having to shudder or scale back operations, and all the chains are just... It's just an amplification of what we saw over the past couple of decades, where chains and fast food are becoming more prominent, and local places are tailing off. Mitch, how about you? Have you been eating... Since you've been back in Quincy, have you been eating more or less fast food?

Yeah, of course. We don't begin credulous. I mean, here's the deal. My mom yells at me, I'm 38 years old, and my mom yells at me when I eat fast food. So I've been sneaking more fast food lately. How do you put it in a different bag or something? I wear a very tall hat. Yeah, that's why you're like, I'm practicing for my Abraham Lincoln play.

And your mom's like, Abraham Lincoln seems to be dripping milkshake from thy brow. He was in biblical times. What is your routine? You eat in your car or what do you do? Four score and seven fries ago. Oh boy. Holy seven. I mean, yeah, that's great. That's great.

It's really, no notes. It's good. Oh, Weiger, would you be happy if I said nuggets? The sketch teacher. The Nuggetsburg address. The Nuggetsburg address. No, the only way you could have made Weiger happy is four score and seven hot salads ago. Come on, Weiger.

Come on, Wags. Wags is true. You're needling me with podcast canon. It's not true. Wags, on election day, just admit it's true and Biden will win. Yes, on today of all days, please now. Never. I'll never admit it.

Not even for Biden to win? Not even for Biden himself. Wow. Even if Biden were here and personally requested it, I would never, ever in a million years just declare that I actually like hot salad. This is a fiction. You've just jinxed it. Weiger?

Yeah. I just want you to know regarding that hot salad crack, I'm sorry. It wasn't cool. I respect you and I hope you can find it in your heart on election day to forgive me. Wow, that's really big of you to say, Paul. I do forgive you and yeah, it's totally cool. You're just having fun. It's just part of the podcast.

We know what this is. You guys should kiss and make up. Come on, guys. We're friends. Do you want to kiss? Zoom kiss? Yeah, we can zoom kiss. Well, we can zoom kiss now and put a post-quarantine kiss on the books.

Emma, how much for like a kiss sound effect to add in here? Oh, those are free. Oh, okay. That's nice. You can kiss each other all you want. Okay. Emma, I have a question. How much to put like a fleshy pad on my laptop so that it feels as if I'm kissing lips?

Jesus. I don't know. Google that and let me know what you find. Yeah, it's really outside of our area of expertise. Yeah, Google fleshy pad. Google fleshy laptop pad and let me know what you find. There's no fleshy pads. You got the pad.

Is that how you describe the feeling of lips? Fleshy pads. What are you talking about? Lips are fleshy. How else would you describe lips? They're fleshy pads. I mean, I just say lips. I don't know if I'd say fleshy pads, but if you're saying why isn't there a thing that

I can put on my laptop to kiss that feels like human flesh, I would just think that's not an item that's in high demand. Yeah, no shit, you dumbass. I know this. Look at Matt at me. He just asked me why it didn't exist. I actually don't think that a fleshy pad exists for a back book. Yeah, no, I'm joking.

It's a joke on election day. Mitch, my friend Buffalo Bill might be able to help you, but he's a little out there. Hey, speaking of Buffalo, who here is eating Buffalo? I have. And let me tell you, it's a lot like beef. Hold on a second. I gotta ask. Hold on one second.

I gotta need a time out for a second. Yeah. Mom, are you okay? No, I'm on. I'm doing the podcast. The broom fell down the stairs. I thought my mother had fallen. Oh my God.

What's with the election night omen? Ma, you're okay? What's the broom mean? Does the broom indicate a bite and sweep of the Midwest? Ma, are you still down here? Ask her what the broom means. Will Trump bristle at the news? Ma, what does the broom mean?

Perhaps there is some sort of witch's bruit play in the Electoral College. Okay. All right, we're recording. Say hi from Cassidy later. Maybe just a simple indication that Biden will stick to the issues. Stick? Like a broomstick? Yeah.

Yeah, like a broomstick. Yeah. Issues. Is everything okay, Mitch? Ma, everything's fine, right? You can go up and check on her if you want. Go check on her. It's a broom that she didn't...

You hurt. Is that the broom? Is that the broom? That was Paul doing an impression of your mom. Don't be misled by that. You're probably confused. Why don't you come up on a niche economy? My mom sounds like Miss Piggy here for some reason.

No, I don't. Did Miss Piggy say dough? I hurt my fleshy pads. Your lips? Who even uses those words? Oh, I know who does. My Kermie. Well, and your lips is a snout.

It's like one lip and a snout. It's not even the same. Why are we comparing apples to oranges here, Miss Piggy? Piggy, we know I want to kiss your fleshy pads, Piggy. Oh, Mitch. Mitch, your neighbor, Fred Gable, he's up here, the one who sounds like Kermit. It ain't easy. Kissing your fleshy pads.

Mom? Two Kermits. Are you still down here? I don't want you to hear any of this. Wait, it's not. You're just going to do your headphones, right? Yeah, but she's hearing me say weird things. Mitch, I will pay you $100 right now to say come.

No. Emma, no. He won't do it. I'll do it too. Emma. I'll pay $102. Well, I'll give you $100. What are you saying, Emma?

She can hear us. All right. That's enough for me to touch. She said neither one of you should be saying things I can't hear. That's what she's saying. Wow. This is a total like sleepover moment. I got so scared.

I was like, oh, you didn't mean it. I'm sorry. I was just trying to make my friends laugh. Mom? This is anarchy. Oh, man. Mitch has cupped his hand to the microphone. He's leaning in very close, making himself very small.

Come. Come. Come. Come. Come. God damn it. Through an extra swear. We only heard the end of it.

We couldn't hear the C. I can't say that loud. I only heard like um. Yeah, it sounded like you just said um. What? You were stalling for time. Because of that, you now have to give us all those sound effects for free because I did your bet.

Okay, fair trade. Wow. I think we both come out ahead. Well, hey, let's get into Burger King this week's chain, which we last reviewed just over a year ago with our friend Haley Mancini. We reviewed the impossible whopper upon its introduction, Mitch. Burger King was founded in 1953 as Insta Burger King in Jacksonville, Florida. Pivotal, Florida.

How about that? Wow. They dropped the Insta Facebook style the next year, 1954 and are now just Burger King, obviously. And also, like we always mention, known as Hungry Jacks in Australian. Hey, to our Australian listeners, hello down under. Jesus. Do they like that?

I don't know. Never got any feedback one way or the other. Cassidy, I wanted to ask. Hey, don't forget who was president in 1953. Me, Dwight Eisenhower. Wow. Did you look that up? No.

Also, this is how I sound. Very cool. Always very believable when someone is yelling at you, this is how I sound. It's hard to not believe. There was a whole thing with, because Dwight Eisenhower famously had an incident with his health and then it was a whole White House press corps was trying to decide how much do we cover it, how much do we don't. I think it was a heart attack.

And so, the White House doctor just decided, I'm just going to say every single bit of information, I'm just going to give out everything, including at one point he just said like, the president had a stool which was unremarkable. And that was just reported out that the president took a normal shit. And at that point, the press corps was like, I think we don't need to get all this information anymore. And the stock market crashed. I got a question for you.

Do you think my mom is secretly a witch? That's the reason for the broomstick. Yes. And she was actually attempting to fly on it. So just a new witch or not good at a witch? Is your mom okay? She's okay, right? She's okay, right?

It was the broom that fell. It was not her. Okay. Which leads me to think, is she secretly a witch? Well, have you seen any cauldrons in the house? Great question. No, but there are cats in the house now. Uh-oh.

But do you have any alfs in the basement? Wait, what? Yeah, what? That would explain the cats. There's some alfs in the basement. Okay. They're grooming them for dinner. If there were alfs, hey, I've said this to Weiger before.

But if I ever met Alf, I would knock his teeth out. I'd pull each of his teeth out so he couldn't harm Wally and Irma. Right, Weig? You torture an alien life form. You dismember an extraterrestrial just so your cats weren't threatened. Also, did you? You're pulling out my teeth. Yeah, that's right.

You don't touch my cats, you fucking asshole. Wally, my molars. Mitch, did you pluralize Alf to alves? Paul did, yes. No, Paul said alves. That's good. Alf, you have to protect your molars, Alf. I believe, doesn't Alf only have those two teeth?

Like two on the top and then just kind of a fur mouth? Like instead of, that would be furry pads instead of fleshy pads. Let me look at the death marks on my dick. Oh boy. There's four. Great. So Alf was... That's when clarified.

Great, so Alf's going down on Paul, great. Everyone's happy. Mitch, I don't think your mom is a witch because she is such an angel to be around. That's true. Remember when you told her the bed was uncomfortable that you slept in at the house? Look, she was a great host. Wonderful sense of hospitality. We had some wonderful conversations.

She cooked some great food, had a great... And her award was Wiger saying the bed he slept in was uncomfortable. It was your childhood bed and I was just being honest. It's kind of uncomfortable. Guess what, I slept in that bed for fucking 15 years, more than that. 20 some odd years now. The springs are probably... Didn't have anything left in them.

The springs are bouncy as hell. You could put them on your shoes and bounce halfway to the moon. So why did you guys request Burger King? Why did you want to cover this chain in particular? Well, I think... To give credit or credit to you, the first episode was with John Roy. That's right. John Royer first, we returned it to it with Jordan Morris and then we were visited one more time with Hailey Mancini.

Now we are reviewing it with the two of you. Well, we stand on the shoulders of giants here with them. I think Burger King, they're one of the top three. Like Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, the big three. Interesting. They would be the Studio 60 maybe. I think McDonald's... What do you think, Wags? McDonald's, Wendy's and Burger King?

Those are the big three. Carl's? I'm not saying like my favorite. I'm saying like... In the United States, wouldn't you think that Wendy's, Burger King, McDonald's are kind of like the big three? Certainly in terms of market share and I guess mind share even. I think that's what people think of if you're going to have a triforce of fast food burger concepts. I think Burger King is definitely in the mix.

Yeah. Insta Burger King is dumb. That sounds dumb. Was it like Insta Burger, like it's fast food is so new we have to have Insta in the name of the place? Yeah, I think that was, you know, the post-war sort of everyone was into gadgetry and efficiency and I think is mechanization. Yeah, exactly. So it was kind of some of that bleeding into it. Yeah, it sounds familiar. The Astro Bomb. Right.

The Insta Bomb. That's right. Sorry, I said Astro. Hey, you know, I had kind of an Insta Bomb when I Instagrammed a selfie and no one clicked like. Dear God. So yeah, Burger King, one of the big three, I mean, was it one that you guys went to when you were younger? Was it like a favorite of yours as kids, either of you? Yeah.

I would say the big ones for me growing up were Wendy's, McDonald's and Burger King and Subway, actually, too. Subway is one of the biggest, I mean, I think Subway still has the most locations of any fast food restaurant in the world. So Subway is very, very big. But yeah, yeah, I mean, I'll to answer myself when I want to hear from Paul and I want to hear from Mitch as well. Like Burger King was not as much of a place that I went to as a kid, but it was a place I went to a lot as an adult. In particular, because one of the Burger Kings I went to for this episode was a Burger King that was directly across the street from an office building that I worked in for years when I was in the video game industry. And so it just became such a go-to either work lunch or after work quick grab dinner.

But Paul, how about you? What's your history with Burger King? Hey guys, you want to run across the street, get dinner a BK and talk about what color Crash Bandicoot's pants should be? Man, I wish I worked on the Crash Bandicoot franchise. What a dream that would be. Let's talk about what color Tony Soprano is, I guess. I did briefly work on the Sopranos game. And you also decided on gray for Tony, didn't you? Well, you guys have some feelings about his background, right? His kind of family?

Yeah, actually, interestingly. Comes from a no good Italian family. Oh boy. But it's fun. Doubling down, I love it. It's fun to watch the show because you laugh at Italian culture for a few seasons. That's why you watch Sopranos. That's why we're looking at it for a good laugh.

Paul, are you a BK fan? Yeah, I love Burger King and I think growing up it was partly exotic because we had a McDonald's in our town and maybe I'd come by Wendy's even more, but in Burger King you'd have to kind of maybe go further than a stone's throw away to get one. Now, here's the twist. The place I probably, the fast food joint I eat most at now is probably Burger King and it's so close by. It's the opposite of what I grew up with.

Wow, an Oh Henry ending. How about that? Yes. An ending that would make M Night Shyamalan shit his chicken McNuggets. They should have gotten M Night to do a bunch of McDonald's ads or something. Oh man, that would have been so good. Somebody thinks they're eating a cheeseburger and then by the end they're eating a fish sandwich. Yeah, that's what would happen. That's very good.

It's still a sandwich. Mitch, you and I have talked at length about Burger King over the number of years we've been doing this podcast, but Recap, what are your feelings on the chain past and present? Past was the place that I would hang out down by a bank parking lot in a 7-Eleven and a Burger King. That was where me and my friends hung out, including Wu Tang and Joey Oh, and Justin and Micas and the two foes and a bunch of people. Scoop. Remondi in there maybe?

Remondi was in there, not as much, but he was there. Yeah, yeah, Chankton. We all hung out there and then we'd eat a Burger King quite a bit. Martin, the nader I call him. We'd all eat a Burger King. We'd all eat a Burger King. Yeah, we don't want to be reminded of nader on election day, Mitch. Oh, God, I'm sorry.

It's all right. My first vote was for nader. Now, look, Iowa went blue that year in the 2000s, so it's okay, it's okay. It is okay. I did vote nader. We're not going to remind people what I voted for in that election, but anyway. It is bananas that we are releasing, that we are recording this on election day and not releasing it for like three weeks. This is going to be such a weird little time capsule for people to listen to.

Perhaps people will have some post-election trauma. They'll still be processing and then just relive it all over again in a few weeks. Either way, it'll be obnoxious to listen to. Well, let's get into it. I just got some election results. Trump has just won the state of Carlsberg. What? What?

What? I don't get it. Nobody. Your mom just said what from upstairs. Mitch has set his microphone down. She's holding a monkey's butt shaped cup up to the door to hear. What the hell are you talking about, Pam? What is that?

Carlsberg? Mitch can't breathe. Explain yourself. What is going on? Mitch is shaking his head. Let's move on, please. Oh my God. You can't.

We can't. What does it mean? We're so confused. They voted for Trump. Carlsberg? Who is Carlsberg? What's Carlsberg? I was just saying a fake state.

That's all. No. Oh, no. Oh, man. You hear a mess. Correct. This is a tough day, people. That was good.

Oh my goodness. That was funny. Yeah. We liked it. That's really good. I'm glad to have it. I did. I really like it now.

It's like one of those things after you get pranked, you can appreciate what the prank was. Yeah. I'm like one Zachary Brath who chased the punk kids who messed up his car. That's right. He was livid. And he was about to beat up the 12-year-old.

Yeah. Well, if that wasn't aming enough, I don't have to tell you what he said about the Da Vinci code as he was walking out of the theater at the Yark Light. Yeah. Exquisite. Is that what he said? Ron Howard does it again.

Well, we should get into Burger King. Have you ever seen the video of Zach Brath catching, have you ever seen that of him catching the kid? No, I just read the story. Yeah. I've watched lots of videos of Zach Brath catching kids, but not for punked. It is funny.

He grabs and he's like, you little shit, I'm going to suck your little dick. And then Donald FaZe and grabs and he's like, it's a prank, man. It's punked. And the kid's like, also, it's not little. Oh, fuck. Yeah.

See? Check it out. And then he does it. And they show that unedited on MTV. It's wild. Tasteless. Yeah. Crazy piece of footage.

So I used the app to order from Burger King, but with drive through pickup, which is an option they have, can I say this? And I hadn't used the Burger King app before. It is a fantastic app. It's very slick, very smooth. And I will say that, you know, Paul Rust, you were shouting out fast food workers earlier,

service workers in general, just as such a tough climate right now. And I will say the workers there and all on my multiple visits to Burger King were super duper friendly and, you know, dealing with an impossible circumstance right now. And like that, my experience was that all these BK workers were doing a great job under the circumstances. They, it was, you know, prepared quickly. And I was very happy with the service.

So here's the order I got on my primary visit. And I had a couple peripheral visits that I will talk about those other items as well. I'll talk to my first order first. My main order, my primary order. I got the vanilla mini shake. And I'm going to start from the bottom because this was the lone disappointment. I watch, I don't love BK kings, BK shakes rather, BK kings, another matter. I don't like BK shakes and watching them make this through the window,

you could tell it was just pumps of word goop. And it was tasted very artificial as expected, tasted very medley and kind of the texture of tahini sauce. Pretty unpleasant shake. That said, the burger I got was the Big King XL, which is a jumbo size version of their Big Mac clone. My response was Big King XL, give me the M. The XL is too much.

It's too big and it's too bunny in particular, just way too much bun here. However, there's a great char on the patty. The sauce is good. They use the stacker sauce as kind of their Mac sauce, which I think works really well. Lots of pickles here. I love all the pickles they throw on there. And I prefer the onions and lettuce that they use here

and the absence of a middle one over the Big Mac itself. That said, I still like the Big Mac more, but this is a very good Big Mac adjacent sandwich. Natalie got the Bacon King, which she basically described as a whopper with bacon. She liked the double meat and cheese. We got ourselves some medium onion rings and some medium classic fries. Onion rings, great fry, light texture, good consistent ring size.

They give you a BK, we had a BK ranch because we got some nugs, which I'll talk about in a second. And this benefits a lot from the ranch as does the fries. Here's the comment I wrote down in my notes app about my Burger King fries. Am I falling for BK fries? Wow. I think I might be falling for them. They're good.

These were well-fried. They had good Christmas, good potato texture. And I went back and got some more today and I had the same sort of reaction. They're good fries. You come home and Natalie's like, is that Burger King French fry I smell on your collar? But the fries are good. And then I got the spicy nuggets, which I think are maybe not better than McDonald's

because McDonald's nuggets are better, but they had a good heat to them and they were meatier than expected. Again, the good ranch helped. So that was my primary order. Mitch, how about you? What did you get from Burger King? Well, it's funny that, so I've made two visits to Burger King, but funny that you say the first thing you said,

that's what I went back for on my second trip today. Wow. Oh my gosh. I went back for the Big King XL, which I realized if it was a T-shirt, it would be too tight on me. State of Carlsberg. I got the Big King XL and I liked it quite a bit. In Wags, I think it was a pretty good sandwich.

First of all, I like the Burger King patties. I think they're good. The burger patties with cheese on them, I think they taste good. If they're warm, I think you can get a cool, sometimes they can be a little too cool. That's the issue with Burger King. I think sometimes that the sandwich itself, but hey, that's a Big Mac issue too.

Sometimes the beef isn't hot, hot, hot as hot as you want. But I got the Big King XL and I liked it quite a bit. In Wags, I said this to my mom, because I got my mom two sandwiches to try. I said to my mom, these fries are good. Wow. Did they take away the breading? Did the fries change?

I mean, I think they've made some tweaks. They definitely don't seem as, if there is a breading on there, but it definitely seems a lot less pronounced than it used to be. This is a love story. Both of you falling in love with fries, it's beautiful. Yeah, I mean, they're good fries. And Nick is falling in love for the first time. A person who doesn't like fries, you love the BK fries.

Now, hey, hold on. Let's not have a sequel to the hot salad debacle. Let's back it up. I do like fries. Whoa, that was weird that that... Yeah, the truck came by after Paul did the noises. Can you do the noise again, see if it happens again? Yeah, let me try.

Oh, wait, you might have to say back it up first. Oh, sorry, you're right. Back it up. That was worth it. Yeah, very good. I also got the onion rings. I got a medium onion ring. And I thought they were well cooked. They were good. My mom didn't let the onion rings. She thinks they're too battery.

But, hey, hold on. Wait a minute. Not to accuse my mom of being a witch again, but too bat-ery? Oh, boy. Which as a witch maybe wouldn't make much sense. Maybe she wanted to be more bat-ery. She probably would want them to be more battery. So that's maybe evidence that she's not a witch and also not a robot.

No, the timeline all lines up, because if you think about it, it's just a couple days after Halloween, I bet they're taking new applicants. Wow. She's not getting the broomstick down. They're flying all over the place. Me and Mike, Mike, remember when that time we tried to become witches and our broomsticks flew around the back here? Getting the broomsticks is the trickiest part.

It'll fly out from India faster than anything you've ever seen. Wow. We tried really quickly, though. Yeah. We survived. It was fun, though. I recommend it. It's a good day trip out of LA.

It's a fun date. Oh, I loved it, too. We had a great day trip and a great date when you and me did that, Mike. That sounds like fun. It sounds like a blast. Hey, I'm not going to talk ill of it. I do not want to be turned into a toad. Anyways, after that...

Woo! Yeah! People... People might be confused that this was recorded on Halloween instead of Election Day. They might not make any sense. Is there any difference? Thank you.

Put the diamond to the thing. The sad thing is... I'm not trying to make people be silly, but if we stuff too many dimes in the monkey, it's going to have to be euthanized because there's going to be too many dimes. Even the fake one? Even the fake monkey.

We don't want that. So I got a B-King XL meal large, so I got the fries and a Coke. I got a Coke with that. I pushed in the diet button on the Coke, so my mom would think that it was a diet Coke. And then I got... Man, you're the funniest.

Then I got myself... I got myself an order of four-piece mozzarella sticks, and that came with some marinara sauce. They gave me marinara sauce and zesty... Oh, boy. They gave me the BK zesty sauce, and they also asked for ranch, because I also ordered the jalapenos,

the cheddar jalapeno bites, and so I thought that the ranch would be good for those. Mitch, is your intolerance so blind? You just told us you ate marinara sauce and didn't gag? Oh, fuck. You're fine to eat their food, but you can't tolerate the people.

This is like an after-school special where Mitch is like, I hate Italians, and then he's eating marinara, and then he's like, well, you know who makes it, right? Oh, what? I love people. Italians make marinara sauce? I mean, yeah, that's where... Yeah, that's its origin.

That's right, yeah. I got one thing to say, Wags. Eat shit, you stinky Italians. Oh, my God. Wow. Wow, you're drilling down in. I guess you're passionate about it. You got to have your passions.

What, it's fucking Wario in the Italian defamation league coming after me, Wager. Is Wario Italian or is he German? I don't know if he's canonically Italian. I mean, I think the Mario brothers, they're kind of their own thing. The Mario brothers are Italian, Mario and Luigi. Well, I mean, it's like, were they...

You know, if you did their 23 and Me, would it say they're Italian? I don't know. I mean, like, look at how they sit in with what are supposed to be real people in New Dogs City. They're not really humans. I wonder if you did 23 and Me, if you'd find any Koopa blood in there. Wow. Oh, boy.

Luigi comes from a family of... That. Um... Loquitoes. What's the flying one in the cloud? Yeah, loquitos. You know, I think Luigi has some shy guy blood in him just from his personality.

Wow. Hey, Shigeru... Shigeru Miyamoto, if you're listening to this, we got you some ideas here for free. Miyamoto, free a charge. Take whatever you like. Thanks for listening. Hey, and Wags,

I know that you don't want to do the podcast for too much longer. Two years tops. That's the cap. Yes. After this year, two more years. We don't have an announcement on the show. That's messed up. Now everyone knows. Two more years after this year. Are you serious? You're just trying to get everyone to be mad at me and tell me to keep doing the show.

No, that's fine. I'm kind of... Is this like some Howard Stern-level contract negotiation thing you're doing, Wager? Power play? Yeah. Patreon.com? He wants to put... Wager is angling to be a part of the Joe Rogan podcast network.

I would love to sell out to Spotify. Gotta be the dream. Let me fucking cash in. Gives a shit. Before we wrap up, also, I like Italians. Are people gonna be mad at me? Yeah.

Oh, boy. Why is this surprising to you now? I'm sorry. That's very genuine and nice. I'm just having fun. It's good, bitch. It's okay. I think Irish people are pieces of shit, too. Too?

And most of all... And most of all, Americans are the worst. That's true. And hey, on that Sage note, let's take a break. We'll be right back with more Doe Boys. Welcome back to Doe Boys. We are here with Don't Stop Or Will Die,

Michael Cassidy, Paul Rust, discussing Burger King for the fourth time. Paul Casserole, let's talk about your BK orders. Paul, we'll start with you. Wager, I wasn't done yet. Well, you were taking your sweet fucking time.

We'll come back to you. You'll get another chance to talk about Burger King. Okay. All right. Paul, what did you get? You two are the funniest pair. Each sentence you said there

was so funny. I had more. You're taking your sweet ass fucking time. We love you guys. Yeah. We're having fun. So my experience, we kind of buried the lead here.

Mike and I met at a Burger King. Wow. Wow. We did bury the lead. That's huge. Mike was the boss and I was going in for a job interview.

Wait, really? Yeah. Wow. That's amazing. I went in there and Mike, you remember, I was very nervous. Yeah. Well, I made you jump through the hoops. You know,

a few little extra hazing measures to make sure you had what it takes. Flipping the pickles. Toasting the buns. Now, those were figurative words about the how you were hazing me.

Yeah. Yeah, and then we became best friends pretty much instantly. Yeah, right at the end of the hazing I looked at Mike and I said will you be my best friend? Mike said yes and I said can I love you? And he said yes.

Wow. Wow. That's amazing. But outside of that honk digitally. Are you still working at the BK? Was that someone

looking for their food? I didn't get hired. Oh, no. Oh, you didn't get hired. But that might have been some of the honking at Mike to be like hey, I'm still waiting at the drive-through. Yes, it's true. I thought it was like one of those democratic rallies where they had people drive in

and then they would honk for their appreciation. Right. And at the end of the joke that we worked at Burger King, one car went honk. Well, I don't know if you can hear the buzzing in the background, but my mom has put the alarm on the dryer.

So there's a buzzing coming from my from my end as well, so I apologize. Oh, that's okay. Yeah. It is not a B, luckily. It's the buzz of a dryer. I gotta say, this B can't take the spin cycle.

Okay. It's maybe a B in your dryer. Somebody turn off the spin cycle. Now, could it be just fly and not be, you know, it would be fine and would not be being flopping around in the dryer? What do you mean, fly in the dryer

so that it's not affected by the tumbling? I think he's suggesting hovering kind of in the middle. Yes. That's like a Mission Impossible plot point where you have to stay in equilibrium in the center of the chamber. That is like a thing that Ethan Hunt would do.

Suspend it in midair. Air is swirling around him. Let me try and do that. I'm doing it. I've become master. Wow. You know, I'm glad we dedicated so much of the show early on

to declaring that we're not going to be silly today. It really paid off. Master makes honey. No, okay, so I think I went and I got the two cheeseburgers

which is a little bit of Stockholm syndrome to be honest with McDonald's. I like that and maybe I've fallen in love with my captor McDonald's that I like to get that at Burger King. I've tried to get the whopper before

but I had like one very traumatic experience with a whopper trying to eat one in the backseat of a car with a family on vacation and was getting all happy and gross. So it's hard for me sometimes to get my mind around

because that was just last week. It really did happen to me but when I was like in seventh grade or something. You know what? I really like Burger King and when I have their burgers

I do like mustard and the pickles have this kind of like little kick a little kind of a wise ass kick and I was thinking about it. I was like that's fitting

because McDonald's and Wendy's seems like the daddy and the mommy of the restaurants and like Burger King does feel like a teenage, like a Bart Simpson kind of more mustard dude.

These pickles might be a little sharp tasting but they fit my attitude. Come on boy. Tone it down with the mustard. Dad, you ate mustard when you were my age. Hey Oma, something seems to be troubling you.

Is Bart eating mustard? It's the boy. He likes mustard with a kick and I like it smooth. Hey, don't bring that mustard on the bus. It'll get all over the seats. Oh, Otto. Hello, Otto.

Hey, Otto, you're not usually here in Mo's. But we welcome you anyway. I guess it would probably not be the kind of image they'd want to convey on a children's cartoon that a school bus driver was drinking so they probably intentionally avoided

putting Otto. But come and shit with us. Yeah, come sit with us. Bart, I don't like you sitting with those men. Hey, a midge. Honey, if you're at home, who is watching Maggie?

Maggie. Maggie's on the cast register, man. The whole family should have been at Mo's is what we figured out. That would have solved a lot of their problems. The whole family was hanging out at Mo's. Yes, that would have been very good. The buzzing is driving me fucking insane.

There's buzzing at the buzzing. No one is hearing the buzzing. We can't hear the buzzing, Mitch. If you can power through it, thankfully it's not coming in on our end. Jesus. Mitch. Did you murder a bee

and bury it under your floor? This incessant buzzing. It's true, it's true. I killed the bee. So, Paul, you got two cheeseburgers. Yeah, I did. What else did you get? Let's talk us through the rest of your meal.

French fries. Fries, very good. And a shake. What kind of shake are we talking? Chocolate shake. I like, let's try to do this. I'm like a 13-year-old that you brought in and you're asking questions.

Chocolate. What's it to you? Hey, you know who likes frosted chocolate milkshakes? Your old man. Me, Homer. That's right. Dad, it's

zoo? Can we try that again, guys? I said zoo. Wow. I tell you, it's a zoo in this podcast that you guys are here. Hee-haw! Hee-haw! Nay. Moo.

How could I do different animal sounds? We do two. I'm sorry, we do two. You just do two? Two sounds. We got the bee buzz. You can toss that in there. Three sounds. That's all you need.

So you got the... How are the... talk us through the fries, talk us through the chocolate shake. Oh, the fries are... hey, guys. Maybe because I've been having them more. I've just been really... I've been on the love train for the

Burger King. Now it might be a bit of a case of lowered expectations and they're never going to enter the universe of McDonald's, but I do think they are better than Wendy's. Wow.

Interesting take. I mean, I think it's not... I think the Wendy's fries have gone downhill. I don't like the potato skins on them. They got two potatoe, which is the dumbest move they've ever done. I mean, I like them both. I think there's room for both,

but hey, I don't think it's a wild take to say that BK's fries are better than Wendy's. Cassidy, how about you? You said you had a few different times to Burger King. Talk us through some of the menu items you got. Sure. Yeah, I did the app,

the delivery from the app. Wow. And I got a whopper with cheese, no onions. Sometimes onions get in my way of an otherwise just awesome slammed on the sandwich. Thank you. I appreciate the lack of onions.

Oh yeah, well, and Dracula has been staying with me. Right. Dracula famously hates garlic. Dracula famously hates garlic. But I guess onions are adjacent. Garlic will kill him, but he just doesn't like onions.

Oh, he just doesn't. That's just a taste thing. Yeah, why do you only see me through that prism? I'm sorry, Dracula. I just don't like onions. Maybe I just don't like sunlight. Sorry, no onions.

Yeah, I got a whopper with cheese, no onions. The fries were averaged a little damp. I wrote some notes too. Let's see. And I got my kids some chicken nuggets, and they were great. The chicken nuggets were probably the best thing that time. Then

another morning I just needed like an ice coffee, so I drove through a BK that was close. And I got breakfast, which maybe doesn't enter into this, but the eggs were wet unlike my Sausage Egg and Cheese Biscuits. Damp fries, wet eggs, Mike. There's a lot of moisture. But I got fries there. They got 24-hour fries,

which is huge points for Burger King. 24-hour fries just seems like a damn no brainer. I feel like, I don't know, it must be just not cost-effective to keep the fryer all day or something, but these fries were better, for sure. And then I also tried the spicy

chicken junior, and what I wrote here was I wrote wet eggs yuck, fries better, spicy chicken junior, dog shit. Wow. That's a bummer. Really terrible. What a disappointment. We're awesome. I love those little hash rounds.

You gotta have the spicy chicken junior, babe. Little Dennis Miller. No, sorry. What's that? Sammy Davis Junior. Is this Sammy Davis Junior? Okay. Oh, got it. Okay.

And then today I got to delivery again, because today's the day for self-care, and I just wanted to have it right before this. Right. Beautiful. And the Whopper that I got before, Paul, was very much like the one you described. There's just like two, I think it just kind of falls apart a little bit, or maybe that was the the price paid for the delivery.

By the time the Whopper got here, the bun was kind of not holding together. Great. But I got a Whopper, which he's been making this time, and I tried getting extra pickle, and it was great. Because the pickles, who said pickles? Was that you? I was talking pickles,

but I think Russ was talking pickles, too. I love pickles, too. Like the pickles really were stand out on their Whopper. It fell apart, too, though. I mean, the sandwich doesn't hold together, but it's really good. And the fries this time were fantastic. Wow. So I got three fries

from three different places, because I got delivery from two different places. Wow. And today's fries were really, really good. I got to go shut off this buzzer. The buzzer is driving me crazy. Okay. Do you want to shut it off? I'm going to go shut it off. My mom came down here to do, she put some stuff

in the dryer, and the buzzer is going fucking crazy. We can't hear it. I'm trying to be nuts. Your mic might be picking it up, though. Go shut it off. Okay. Shut it off. Yeah, it's all good, man. Yeah, it's good, man. I'll be right back. I'll remind you to start it when we're done. You got the buzzing figured out, Mitch?

The B is dead. I've put an end to the buzzing. You killed Master? I killed Master. Wow. And Wigs, while I was gone, I got some election news. Whoa. This will be old news by the time this episode is released,

but it's breaking news as of this record. Carlsberg has flipped to Biden. Wow. The state of Carlsberg. The state of Carlsberg has flipped to Biden. Rarely thought of as a swing state, historically. I mean, this maybe just speaks to how

a Biden landslide, if Carlsberg is in the blue cake, you know what I mean? Yeah. Carlsberg went from red to purple to blue? Anything is possible if Carlsberg is voting for Biden. That much I can tell you. Yeah, really, really something.

Guys, we are writing history in wet cement here. Yeah. I did want to say that the pickles were a standout, but on all the sandwiches I got, the lettuce was not good.

The lettuce on these sandwiches was... What did you like about it? It was just... It was just a little kind of a mushy-gushy lettuce. It was not a crisp... You need a crunch out of a piece of lettuce.

That's, I think, maybe why I appreciated the pickles so much because I was getting that in spades with the pickles and the lettuce didn't measure up. Big tomato on the wall. Burger King is kind of like rug rats for me. Pickles is my favorite. Wow. Yeah, I would say that too.

If you watch Rugs Rats, your favorite is the pickles family. So Tommy and his mom and dad, is that what that implies? Well, it's weird on the app. You can go on the Burger King app and you put in your order and then after you order, there's a button and it says,

are we like rug rats to you, yes or no? Yeah. But you know what it means. Yeah, we know what it means. You push a little photo of pickles. It's a photo realistic photograph of photo rendering of pickles.

We're fleshy rendering. It's very disturbing actually. Fleshy pads. You can get a fleshy pad that goes over your laptop that looks like pickles so you can kiss pickles. Cassidy kind of thing. Kind of Zach Braff might own. Yes.

Cassidy, what you're saying is true. Burger King is a lot more like stimpy. An idiot. Oh my god. Christ. Everybody is so funny.

Well, I do want to talk. Go ahead, Mitch. Zach Braff joke earlier. Where I saw that. Me and Smithers say you have nothing to worry about. I think you're fine.

We'll find out. We'll find out. Mr. Burns and Smithers already weighed in so I feel fine. Yeah, you can try. Mr. Burns is whatever, a billionaire. You can trust him over me. There was one other point of business I wanted to get to.

Mitch, I know you have a little bit more food to discuss before we get to our final thoughts, but the commissioner of the Doe Boys turned into a champion so the both of you know well it was a presence on your last episode and throughout the tournament and throughout the run of this podcast, Evan Susser

asked, I would say nay, insisted that we each get the original chicken sandwich aka the long chicken sandwich which I relayed to everyone. I'm not going to make this mandatory because my comments are just, this is so simple but always so good. It's just a long chicken patty, breaded chicken patty

mayo and then shredded lettuce the shredded lettuce and the one I had was good and I just think this is a delightful, simple sandwich. I loved it. Did anyone else get that long chicken sandwich? And if you didn't get it, it means you don't respect Susser. Oh, then I didn't get it.

No, I got it. I got that in the delivery order today and it was I remember getting that a bunch like when I would go in high school and it was like I don't remember loving the whopper loving burgers at Burger King I feel like I got the chicken there when I was going there

when I was going to McDonald's I was almost always getting either the double cheeseburger or the two cheeseburger meal. Always burgers though maybe nuggets but yeah this oblong chicken sandwich yeah it's good it delivered the lettuce on mine was bad I gotta tell you that and maybe that's

the price of delivery again because I did delivery today from the app yeah and then it asked and then I pushed the fleshy photo realistic pickles face at the bottom thank you but I did get it and yeah it was good the lettuce

is like there's not very many ingredients so it's tough when there's like three ingredients it's the huge bun too much bun? little bunny it's perhaps a little bunny I guess so but on the whopper I don't feel like the bun is like

well yeah I don't know it was good on the excels I feel like things get a little too bunny it's I think the bun is in pretty decent proportion it's perhaps just a little shade bunny on the original chicken sandwich but I you know

I think some of their sandwiches can get pretty bunny Russ did you get the long chicken sandwich? speaking of pretty bunnies you and me both brother I hear you god damn bunnies are beautiful that's right

pretty bunnies I agree he's looking at a picture of babs bunny I'm sorry Wags what was that did you get the original chicken sandwich the long chicken sandwich? I did and I'm sorry I don't respect him original chicken sandwich

that's the name of it the original chicken sandwich but everyone colloquially known is the long chicken sandwich Mitch how about you do you get with that long boy? so I'm going to talk about the rest of my order now okay I told you that I ordered let me just go put on a feature film

I'm going to go watch Goodfellas on Mute well oh god wait a minute Goodfellas is a bunch of Italians it's a bunch of Italians Mitch that's your favorite movie maybe I do like Italians Wags

wow maybe you do after all wait didn't we do this once already wait is this for real this time? this time it's for real get down on your knees and kiss a picture of the pope hahahaha uh

the two popes on Netflix enjoyed it so I got the mozzarella sticks and I ordered the cheddar jalapeno bites and they didn't come and then I was going to tell you what my mom ordered Wagger oh how about that she got the original chicken sandwich with cheese

strange choice I thought I think it's a fine choice I would say that that choice to me would positively be witching wait a minute okay alright hey I'm about to drive this bitch up to Salem

hahahaha oh no hahahaha I should never call my mom the B word that was a joke oh man especially when it's witch hahahaha

you're a little devil you're afraid of the devil and you're a little devil look Salem is where they executed the witches that was the joke of that right yes hahahaha I got the original chicken sandwich

and she got it with cheese and then she also got a Whopper with cheese and she liked her Whopper with cheese she thought it was good she also thought the fries were the best wags and she didn't she thought that the chicken sandwich all tasted the same and I think that the cheese was an issue she said that it would be better without the cheese

so I think the cheese was an issue but wise on my return from Los Angeles to back to Quincy I also got some Burger King my first night back Dano drove me through the drive through wow

and also a lady this was very strange but a lady when we pulled up to the drive through this is true and I will get Dano on to confirm this a lady had a metal pole hahahaha and on the bottom of it was a dog food dish

hahahaha we put it on the ground before our car drove up to the window and we don't understand what it was for hahahaha they're doing that nationally hahahaha

and also they had like to protect the workers they had like a thing cut out like a like a thing cut out to like plexiglass or whatever but you couldn't see through it so you couldn't see like it was like you couldn't see anyone

it was very strange hahahaha but she did she slammed the ground with this dish with the pole with the dish on the end of it it was very was this a worker or was this just a random person yes it was no it was the lady at the

drive through window wait we put it on the ground in front of your car she put it on the ground in front of our car yes huh and then you drove over it to get to the drive through window no it was just before like she stamped it on the she like stamped it on the ground hahahaha

and then we drove up as she pulled it back inside and then we drove up and then she she stamped it on the ground after we drove by too hmm that's actually good because I think if she had tapped it twice your car would have started going backwards dude I wonder if there's something

about like they have sensors under the the drive oh good there's a car there or something and she was like smacking a sensor or something wow that could be it that's probably it but I know what I think I maybe know what it could be

is also you know Mitch if your mom is becoming you've seen hereditary right mm-hmm they're kind of all witnessing weird things going on around them as the occult sort of forms I think that was like your mom's friend being like he is the son of the one who

eats uh burger king I mean it's a theory I'm about to drive I'm about to drop this lady off at Salem that's more like it PG version the TV edit version so that on that trip I got the long chicken

sandwich which sus required and I got myself a coca-cola I got a I got a whopper with cheese meal with the fries and the coca-cola the fries drank it proudly without the diet stamp pushed in that is right because my mom was not there she was quarantining at my sister's house

and that wags was uh that that the whopper I loved the whopper with cheese I really had a great time with it nice coke nice fries the long chicken sandwich was good but not as good as I remember it so Susser that was stupid um and uh but overall a pretty

positive experience we declare that BK is back in many ways there was one other thing I got today I got the Hershey Sunday pie ooh how was that? Extremely sweet but very very very good if anyone ever wants to try it's very it's very fun

very sweet but but but very fun well there you go and hey you know it's been very fun spending time with our guest don't stop or we'll die but you know what it's time to get to our final thoughts here on the Doe Boys podcast so we're just gonna go around we're going to give our

assessment of this chain summarize our thoughts and then end by giving it a fork score zero to five forks uh Mike Cassidy we'll begin with you okay um I've been to Burger King a lot in my life like I said probably third or fourth

in the pecking order all time wow just frequency of visit from childhood to adulthood um BK is one of the places that I go to kind of only when I'm like moving so this felt appropriate like I said

um the the original chicken sandwich was good that whopper with cheese is a great sandwich it did fall apart but it didn't bother me it was sloppy like not in a terrible way

and I would order it with extra pickles again that's a good hack that I learned that I enjoyed the pickles were great they let us not so much the breakfast doesn't count but the eggs were wet all day it's almost like you get a tine or two just for offering fries all day and having them not

be shitty in the morning because I got fries and the fries that I got um that were the worst were the fries that I got at night the morning fries were good interesting and I also really like those hash rounds which whatever I'm not gonna let it sway my score we'll make it a dinner-centric

score oh man I didn't know I would go first hmm um yeah it's it's not the most delicious like food like the burgers are good

they're good like it was nothing was nothing was gross nothing was cold nothing came out wrong and the fries really are good you guys better than Wendy's I think that's okay to say I think I'm actually fully on board because Wendy's I there's you know we've discussed it here

and elsewhere there's like we we have special little little atria in our hearts for just for Wendy's um and I love Wendy's but the fries are not necessarily like you know it's okay that the fries suck like Wendy's my love for Wendy's surpasses their fries

it's not it was never really the fries were never really the most consistent thing about Wendy's anyways right um yeah in spite of not because of yeah that's right I'm looking at other things when I go to Wendy's um but I don't know it's reliable

like I after like I went too much for this podcast because it's you know COVID times and election times and I just you know you do the things that make you feel good come on just be easy on yourself everybody just be easy on yourself treat yourself right self-care

and it's just a meal or two don't let it you know consume you but eating Burger King's three times in three days has taught me that I'll probably like trust it more I think like I'll go into a Burger King drive-through if it's between that and Jack in the box

even maybe but sometimes if it's between that and McDonald's sometimes definitely over Carl Carl's junior sorry um okay I'm gonna say I'm gonna say three and a half wow three forks two

times nice very good score for Burger King take away any chance of a Golden Plate Club appearance from Burger King yes not meet the minimum threshold for the Golden Plate Club which is four forks or greater Paul rest your thoughts your score one to five forks

yes um okay I just love the name I think Burger King is a very cool name I think I've ever disagreed with anything

it's done aesthetically always looks real cool bk Burger King the colors love it um and uh I feel like out of all the institutions

it's the one that has the most ease with change case in point the fries but uh also sort of like an adventurous spirit that I uh that I appreciate

how could I forget though the sesame seed buns and yeah and you mentioned the Charles the Charles burger the Charles broiled burger which I would say those are probably like two defining

features that are really good and whether they mess up the burger or not uh you still get some sesame seeds and you still get the taste of a little grill um so I love Burger King um

four forks wow four forks four forks very good score from Paul Rust Mitch what do you say what do you say Night Spoon well Wags I I have a lot of history with Burger King

um or Hungry Jack as he called it Down Under as he said hello Down Under we love that thank you it's an honor flattering you can hear the Australians yelling from

beneath the earth Wags I just realized they don't have to change the logos are the same amount of letters of Burger King really yeah so like it's probably easy just to swap in the letters you don't have to change any of the formatting font

size and what not Hungry Jack Burger King wow I didn't even think about that and the and the G is in the exact same spot that's what it was wow that's probably what it was they can reuse that G

those trick save money those those tricky fucking Aussies I know Mitch oh boy another continent you know what Italians ain't too bad but I hate Down Under

in fact he started this whole thing as an homage to them when I flush my shit I hope it goes Down Under I hope it all lands in Australia what of course it does how else would that work yeah it's called gravity yeah you like

if we cut to like just directly through the earth from you in Australia and like a kangaroo looks up and like and your waist spills down on the Roo's head good and the Roo goes

only Down Under good for I love Italians and dislike Australians now that's the lesson you have all taught me that's canon boy that's canon I

the big question wigs is BK back now BK for a long time I loved it I'd like to get go in there and I'd get a whopper with cheese meal and I'd get a slice of apple pie which I used to really like and I had a good time in BK

back in the days I really enjoyed it is it back it's getting there if you ask me why I think it's I think it's very very good um I think that I think it's improved I think it has improved since we started the podcast I'm not lying for sure

um and so yes in a way it is back and I look forward I feel the same way I think BK is always fun to get like a whopper from if you're like a lot of the times when I'm Christmas Eve and I'm Christmas shopping I'll get a whopper on Christmas Eve I'll go and get a whopper

uh there's a lot of stuff that I love about it but it's not the top tier to me yet I'm gonna go 3.75 forks it's almost in there

Paul and I my score has probably gone down but I you know what I mean I really had a good time with it and I really liked some stuff I almost want to say 4 forks with Paul in fact I will say

4 forks with Paul 4 forks you've gone from being ballpark buds to being in the hand-holding club with rustman Mitch one thing though on Christmas Eve when you're going through the drive-thru

at Burger King do you ever hear a little clop-clop-clop of hooves on the roof of the Burger King yes it's the lady with putting the can on the roof with the dish with the dog dish it was very bizarre

and then she jumps down the chimney and that gives me my order and Australians shit falls on her head 4 that is what happens to me on Christmas Eve at Burger King every minute of it it's 4 forks Cassidy

4 forks good score from the night spoon Mike Mitchell so I made another visit to Burger King today and it was not for the podcast I was just like I want a fun lunch today and I just decided you know what I want Burger King

in fact I was prepping this today's episode I was putting my little outline together interesting did you put it on the Burger King did you put it on the Doe Boys card your Burger King order yeah I did put it on the Doe Boys card so it was for the podcast so this was a fun thing hey have you gotten your money back

from Denny's yet I'm working on it it's election day that's fucking bullshit so why don't order from a mystery Denny's that didn't exist oh yeah I heard this yeah you like

$80 from you right and they were just like oh yeah and he simply hasn't just gone to get his money sent to I gotta call him I gotta call him back I'll do it I said I'll do it make it your top priority I would say don't even vote just do that

you know what there's one thing wise before you before you go back into your view I do gotta say this there is one thing that I do I do want to say um Mike has sent me this text today of Burger King and uh it was it was it's from

the Burger King in the UK I believe but they tweeted out a statement and I thought and this is why and this is part of the reason I'm pushing my fork score to four yeah it says so this was on November 2nd and Burger King tweeted out we know they this is the tweet

we know we never thought we know we sorry I gotta read this correctly okay we know we never thought we'd be saying this either and then it said and then there was a picture in the tweet and it said order from McDonald's and it said we never thought we'd be asking you to do this just like we never

thought we'd be encouraging you to order from KFC Subway, Domino's Pizza, Pizza Hut, Five Guys, Gregg's, Taco Bell, Papa John's, Leon or any other independent food outlets too numerous to mention here in short from any of our sister food chains fast

or not so fast we thought we'd be asking we never thought we'd ask you to do this but restaurants employing thousands of staff really need your support at the moment so if you want to help keep treating yourself to tasty meals through home delivery take away or drive through getting a Whopper is always best but ordering

a Big Mac is also not such a bad thing take care team Burger King UK and and so for that reason I pushed it to four look I know that they're jeez that's good what if I might that's worth a

time I think for me wow I think I think I'm going back and I'm going to say three and three quarters wow that's beautiful that's cool that they did probably making money on it somehow but it seems yeah yeah there's huge

corporation I know I know I know but I thought that it was kind of a nice sentiment yeah it's awesome yeah I'm yeah it's like when they do those with do those old ads where like C3PO is like

congrats ET on being box office Baffo right yeah they did one where it was the Titanic with the Star Wars characters were going down on the Titanic that was a lot of fun they were going like they were giving head to the Titanic

yeah Titanic had a big old hog yeah C3PO I think it showed the like kind of the four imprints from where Alph had been there before yeah oh can you imagine the Titanic that night honey

believe me it never happens I never run into an iceberg that's what you said last week Murray I have a quick question the Titanic's name is Murray Ask James Cameron yeah yeah the shark from Jaws is Bruce

the ship from the Titanic is Murray more canon so what's canon Diane canon that's Diane canon speaking of which I had an idea

when I was thinking through Burger King I had something of an epiphany and if you'll indulge in extended metaphor I was thinking about Mitch our journey over the course of the podcast with Burger King from a tepid response with John Roy to outright hatred with Jordan Morris where we were

in one fork territory just a miserable experience to a huge upswing back with Haley Mancini and again we're in this very positive territory with don't stop or we'll die it makes me think of the last half decade or so

of my beloved Los Angeles Lakers where this team was in the wilderness and we were trying to in the lottery a team that's always in the playoffs that's frequently in the finals

in the draft lottery staking our hopes on Jordan Hill hoping that maybe Kendall Marshall Ramon Sessions, Robert Socrates one of these guys just can put it together and we can assemble maybe even just an eight seed just trying to angle for an eight seed

and then you know what happens the king LeBron James comes to the city of angels sucks and the king is back in LA and the king is back in terms of Burger King

because the Los Angeles Lakers are NBA champions and Burger King I think is a delightful restaurant to eat at that's reliable and consistent and has some dynamite menu items and they're improving on a lot of facets

of their game so I am going to say that by the way today I get the Steakhouse King which is good usually Steakhouse Burger I don't love but this one didn't have too much Steakhouse steak sauce so it was good

I am going to say based on my collective experiences at Burger King I think this one belongs in the Golden Play Club it will not quite get there because our collective scores I am going to give it four forks just like the Lakers championship is kind of an asterisk give me that asterisk I'll take the asterisk

it was a wild season it was a wild year the Lakers championship deserves an asterisk for sure so people can be reminded of how bananas the bubble was of how bananas 2020 was all around but you know what

happy ending in the NBA happy ending in the MLB if you're a fan here in LA if you're a fan of democracy hopefully a happy ending in our presidential election four forks for Burger King just on the outside looking in of the Golden Play Club

are you happy Cassidy? I mean I don't have emotions about it at all I think that's the point, Mitch this is democracy I'm trying to be objective about the food that went into my body my temple

are you telling me to not take that seriously? I apologize it's okay and honestly I do stand by it and I hear you guys and I think the Burger King is great but it didn't quite get there I admire your adherence

to your values and saying this what you believe leave him alone, thank you leave Michael alone leave Michael alone leave Michael alone leave Michael alone yeah, they're gonna come

they're gonna come for me, I know what I was doing coming here mm-hmm they're gonna come for us Paul, were you doing the leave Brittany alone character? yes, it happened last week right? meaning two weeks from now

minus a week Paul I do like Burger King too you said that's a cool name I think Burger King is great it's just like a it could be in a movie and it's like what you make up for the name of the fast food chain Burger King, it's perfect

it's ostentatious and I think it is correct Burger King good outing once again it's time for a segment Burger Burger Burger we've got a set of fast food jingles and you each have to guess what year they're from

it's another edition of Jingle all the way spelled W-E-I-G-H so here's what's going to happen last time I heard this I thought you were discussing that you might use W-H-E-Y oh yeah that's right we never settled on what we're going to do

I'm sorry I'm just interrupting I should let you go ahead we never settled on it you know what I'm going to say it's W-H-E-Y we're going with it it's W-H-E-Y that's canon

so Emma will play each Jingle and then you each will guess the year whoever gets closest without going over gets a point prices right style and there's also the Arden Marine Rule which is if you get the year on the dot you get a bonus points you get two points so we got a few of these

these are compiled by our associate producer the Drop King Robert Persinger and these are all Burger King Jingles from various years we got an email from Arden a cease and desist not call it the Arden Rule oh wow Arden said that wow

wow she's so nice I guess you got to stay on your ground though yeah it's true well we'll play these Jingles these are Burger King Jingles and you each will guess the year so let's begin with this first jingle Emma if you want to share this one

they did it adorable little girl saying they did it at the end so meaning off of a bridge don't stop or we'll die we'd kill to write a jammer like that it's a great jingle so Mitch we'll begin with you I hope that young blonde girl didn't grow up to be a Karen Wags

well it sounds like you have some idea of what her age range might be based off of that Mitch what year do you think that commercial came out now to me to give a nod to one of our guests other podcast um in Jason we trust

now in Kruger we trust mmm oh and Voorhees we trust sorry um that to me looked like Jason that looked like when Jason was just started his killings I feel like I feel like that is like

a 1980 commercial I feel like that Mitch that's so crazy I used uh for a 13th movie as a way to get my I was like what kind of style do they that's funny so I maybe maybe the first one because

is the first one in 1980 Paul you would know this I've yes I think the first one's I think that it's 1980 it's just like better quality obviously then but could it be earlier could it be later I'm gonna go my best buddy Justin loves that podcast by the way Paul so

that's nice he should listen to don't stop or we'll die song a week yes I'm sure he will um I'm gonna go 1980 if 1980 80 on the button I'm sure he's gonna as we as we will be to we will be we I'll definitely be subscribing

very excited for song a week we'll hear more about that later a rust man what do you think what year did this commercial come out okay so um I like Friday 30 I I it looked

like it to me it was between parts 2 and 3 wow okay wow so I put it at part 3 I think came out in 82 so uh I'm gonna say 1982 wow 1982 the birth year

of our own night spoon Mike Mitchell that's right we're to think about that that Jason has been around has been menacing teenagers horny teenagers our entire lives that's longer than Mitch has my mom and my you know what Paul you might be right because my mom said

that she was near TV and that burger King commercials came on and I got like really interested and I started I started to climb out of the womb climb that's all right Cassidy what do you think 1980 1982 are their guesses for this

this is really tough and for the listener it is really a visual judgment that I'm making I think the music actually sounds jingly I it sounds earlier than it looks yeah it sounds cornier than yeah it sounds

like a song from the 70s my idea Cassidy you're either going to go 1979 or 1981 or I mean you can do anything you want to 79 was was the year that I was going to pick before you said 80 so I'm not just being a prices rate shit heel wow

and I don't know maybe that's maybe it's really hard to tell but the clothes the logo it's definitely man this is really hard I was going to say 1979 though and it's not just me like Javel

that's my true and honest guess you're also big smashing from the outside yes Cassidy you could say yay you could say 1970 and win too if it's in the 70s just to that's true yeah the real prices

right move would be 0 AD yes so that's true I really think it's 1979 1979 is your guess I like to be on the nose your boldness pays off wow Cassidy because you got the year right on the

dot which means you get a bonus point wow 79 two points for Cassidy 1979 well done let's play this next let's play the second one congrats to you Cassidy

what that was that was Billy that was Billy Corgan yes okay thank you thank you

let's play the second one come and get it okay so some definite clues there visually for our listeners one is the presence of hoody and the blowfish frontman

Darius Rucker singing that jingle the other is that the that we uh there was another visual clue in there what am I missing oh the king himself the new the burger king mascot was also a presence

you don't have to give all the clues away does Alex Trebek give a little hints our listeners can't see the video I'm trying to paint a picture oh that's right oh the poor listener yes yes right oh

pull over the side of the road and google it alright rest we'll start with you this time what year do you think this ad came out well that ad looks like um the uh burger king advertising agency

saw a little alt comedy yes with the ironic use of Darius uh Rucker and uh we're in on the joke right fuck you uh so I'm gonna put that

level of maybe the most obnoxious form of advertising at 2011 2011 for the rustman you know ruckers should be a pitch for fud ruckers that's right

that would be a natural fit or as long as John Silver's hoody in the blowfish there you go either is a good option Cassidy what do you think yeah this is definitely awful to watch terrible to listen to not doesn't sell cheeseburgers

it's after big rock candy mountain that they're spoofing big rock candy mountain exactly yeah they're making fun of it but it's awesome song yeah also that song was in the zeitgeist with the with a cone brother's movie which might also be a clue

perhaps well and it's after the carls jr sexy commercials seems like because they got like scantily clad character character costumed women with big burgers jumping around with cleavage and stuff and you know I hate cleavage

you guys know that you know that about me it's true we know this I want my cleavage in one place I want my cleavage in one room and my burgers in another thank you um one's the bedroom and it ain't the cleavage one

I'm afraid I think 2011 is a really good guess because it's new yeah I don't remember how long that burger king like the was that do you think that burger king mascot was a reaction to the jack in the box guy or was it the other way around

I think it's a jack in the box that has a little mask head but it's a human guy that's a good question it's eminently possible because a jack in the box I think was the first one of those ironic self-aware fast food mascots but a jack in the box also a regional chain and burger king some burger king ad guys may have seen that

and been like hey we can take that nationwide yeah it's off-putting I don't like it um I'm gonna say 2000 and I'm gonna say man this is um okay yeah

2012 2012 alright both in the first part of this past decade I bet that's way over it but it's it's good I got two points I'm just kind of sitting pretty right now well night spoon if you get the year on the dot

you can tie up Cassidy or you can at least get some points on the board by getting closest without going over prices right style what do you think for this tender crisp bacon cheddar ranch commercial with Darius Rucker what year well guys I uh

I tell you that I uh I know when this came out I know the time when this came out I'm by the way I was so I'm texting my friend Luke Luke Michaels Luke Michaels hi Luke and um

and he sent me a t-shirt for uh unprecedented times dot shop he's selling t-shirts so I'm gonna push he's my friend I'm pushing his website and check it out and get a t-shirt the plug is strong with you Luke er

president like the president of the united edtimes.com dot shop anyways what a great plug why you fucked it up I did fuck it up bad anyways Luke Luke always sang this song in college uh no

and so power over I'm almost like 100% sure that it's 2003 or 2004 oh my god but since I don't want to blow it by guessing I'm not gonna go for the two points wigs look

there's nothing I can do I'm gonna pick 2002 wow going really low well Mitch you weren't both with the year and his voice you were in fact too early but you were the

only one who didn't go over it was 2005 oh it was 2005 that self aware sort of internet video derived marketing has been around it's been with us for that long man that burger king guy has been around that long that's been around for that long

for 15 years see I wasn't sure if it was my junior or senior so it was definitely my senior year here's the thing we went and we I'm embarrassed my cultural meter is just broken look at that I had no idea wronger direction

and also we went to burger king to get this we went to get these and there was also a Kong triple whopper which was three whopper patties oh yeah for the movie king Peter Jackson's Kong and my friend Evan Novik Evan Novik he

you could double the meat and he tried to double the meat to get six patties but he only got a fourth and so he won four patties and there's a banana peel in between each patty there was a banana peel between each patty but

that sandwich sucked we liked that commercial a lot because we thought the song was fun and then the sandwich itself sucked and also in hindsight the commercial kind of sucks too are you talking about the one we just watched

yeah that was the but they weren't advertising the Kong burger there no I'm saying that the chicken bacon ranch sandwich was not good that sandwich sucked I was confused it sounds like just really a desperate sandwich

yeah too much going on ungepochka if you will we've got a couple more we're gonna do let's play this third one Emma that's funny that's funny another ad that ends in a freeze frame we've got a

slalaming going on, ski slalaming around some burger king flags as well as an early iteration of the king mascot you can probably also tell that it's a little bit earlier just from how it sounds alright Cassidy it falls to you your guess

on the year of this particular ad the ad is titled habit your way it's such a gum commercial right isn't this like a double mint gum thing 100% it's like all I could think about yeah it feels like it's earlier than the other one

but I wonder if that's a trick the weird early burger mask thing was very strange yeah there's a burger king villain there too who's the burger king villain what's the mythology there is there an evil king

of a different kingdom it's a Mitchell spinach king it's one of Mitch's ancestors my ancestry.com is just a picture of that guy hmm gosh it's really tempting to say that this one is earlier

because it feels older I'm not gonna do that though I'm gonna say 1982 82 hmm so again when Jason Voorhees is terrorizing horned up teenagers might spoon what do you think

when did this ad come out I think I gotta go earlier than Cassidy if I'm gonna try to get a win here 82 is a good guy I think this could be a sneaky 80s one but I'm gonna go 1975 wow 1975

I'm playing for the night spoon Mike Mitchell I'm playing for the win Wags that's strategic firmly back in the generation X nostalgia world Paul Rust what's your guess what year did this commercial come out

have it your way in the spirit of with Gorley and Russ Mack Gorley is a big Michael Myers fan he came out in 1978 with Halloween so I'll say 1978 because that Burger King mask

I don't know what's scarier that or the Michael Myers mask I think the Mike Myers one yeah the Mike Myers mask well you all overshot it that was in fact 1974 1974 man you almost had it

fuck oh wait was that the third one yeah that was the third one I was wrong actually I was reading the wrong one that one was 1981 so that means that Russ you're on the board damn

he over did it we need to skip the next one he gave away what year that came out in I said it let's skip to the very last one wow and Wiger what year is this from well you'll have to tell me

damn I thought I could get ya Wags I hope the election isn't this tight man this is crazy is it a tight race between us right now I guess so yeah it is Mitch has one Paul has one and Cassidy has two because of the art and green rule

great victory level let's see this last one got the hungries for hungry jacks wow for those of you listening that was a yeah a lot of cool Aussie youth

you know a convertible a dog that was in the car which was very cool and a weird end to that spot where a big lump of shit fell on a kangaroo's head but Mitch you're up now what year did this ad come out what year did this ad come out

what year did this ad come out what year did this ad come out what year did this ad come out what year did this ad come out now I'm tempted because Australians are so far behind the time I'm tempted to guess 2020

those dumb fucks down under Jesus but I'm gonna go Wags 1992 1992 damn alright Rustman what do you think

I was gonna guess 92 so let's do 93 wow that's a Bryce's right move oh it is I just meant it because that's my sincere sorry whatever no I think that's not bad I'm listed

alright casserole what do you think you can clinch it right now man both of those moves are what I would have done had I gone first or second here wow

I really think 92 is a really I think that's a really solid choice yeah I had that thought too maybe they're a little like a little behind it's so 90's though it's hard to go any earlier than 90 has to be like the very earliest

alright I'll see 1990 wow 1990 I'm hoping the Australians are ahead of the cultural curve and this is like actually 1965 or something yeah this was the air we landed on the moon introducing hip hop you guys were all in the right

ballpark but the man who came closest and ties for the win for this week's edition well jingle all the way spelled W-H-E-Y now Paul Rust

1994 was the year don't stop or we'll die both tie with two points of ease hey don't stop or we'll tie hey that was really good by the way you were wrong about the sign it's

it's jacks it is jacks and it's got the apostrophe in there is it not burger I don't know what the hell you were even thinking is it not burger kings oh you're having a laugh I'm having a laugh with you

hey I gotta put a dime in the monkeys butt hey hold on monkeys getting fucking rock hard also speaking to the monkey speaking to the monkey sounds um I'd like to think that

when you were hearing the dryer buzzing that was the singularity bringing bug main into this episode oh boy oh no land into your home where you sleep don't say his name two more times bug main

bugle main bugle main buzz buzz Paul oh boy just like a restaurant we allow your feedback let's open up the feedback and today we have an email from Brian

Brian writes my question for you is what is your most gluttonous food memory most gluttonous food memory in advance of Thanksgiving this is our last full Doe Boys episode before the Thanksgiving holiday

gluttonous food memory I have one that comes to mind while you guys think about it and this is pretty clear this is from high school and it's also a fast food burger thing I went to our beloved Carl's Junior Hardee you and me Mitch

and I got myself a double western bacon cheese burger and whatever the biggest size at the time was I don't know if they were doing an XL size or whatever but it's a big ass size with their biggest Dr Pepper their biggest fries double western bacon cheese burger

came home ate that, ate the fries and then made myself a box of Kraft macaroni and cheese and ate the entire box of Kraft mac and cheese and drank the soda and that was my after school meal one day so that's my they'll pass you by

honestly so much better than so much of what has happened to me over the past decade it was like such a great day in comparison you got me thinking about college again we used to get at Wings over Ithaca we used to get carriers which were like 250 wings or something

and there'd be like whatever like 8 of us just like sitting around a big fucking tub of wings on a table just eating them greasy and farting room full of men basically

8 Mitch like as far as alien resurrection I was the most fucked up Mitch clone but there were better Mitch's that's a big one my answer to this one is hey man, my next meal

you know what I mean I am going further back when I was a kid I had a paper route for like 3 months and then I stopped doing it and I was a total coward about it but on my paper route was

hardies that was the end of my paper route was hardies and and it was just like opening up with biscuit smells at that time because I think they opened at 6 and I would be just finishing maybe I just did it at 630 or something

and I don't know if this was a prevalent thing at Carl's Jr. or hardies but at this hardies and a lot of them in Iowa where Paul and I are from on Sunday they had all you can eat biscuits and gravy

and you could order biscuits and gravy and just keep going up and getting it and I had a couple of mornings where I had an awful amount of biscuits and like I got sick from it because it was really good that was one of my favorite things there

for breakfast I think that was maybe my number one thing at hardies it's easy to get sick on biscuits and gravy the heaviest shit in the world and it's like my body had been awake for 25 minutes and I'm just pounding

solid mass into my stomach undigestible gravy I remember that getting really looking forward to Sundays because these are good memories that's great I love biscuits and gravy so much

and I loved it as a kid I would have loved that if I was presented with that opportunity wow what a gift I just wanted to give a shout out to last year I was at Morimoto's and like Downtown Disney, Disney Springs or whatever it is

in Florida we had Thanksgiving dinner there and that was a giant feast we had peaking turkey it was fantastic and a bunch of other stuff hope you didn't have any roast mouse not at Disney

they wouldn't roast up any of the mice no but I'm trying to think of a big meal and I know that there's more than that hey, may everyone have a nice Thanksgiving out there in these difficult times great wishes

from the Night Spoon most gluttonous food memory rather don't stop or we'll die also wishes everyone a happy Thanksgiving what a great holiday don't stop wishing them an even happier Thanksgiving

we hope that you have even more food than they hope wow that's not a competition good will towards men rooting for each other we got to get through this together I don't know if this was the most I ate

but I certainly felt based on the reaction of the people working at the place I was eating at I must have eaten a lot because I remember I was finishing up the lunch at KFC and the manager went over

as I was finishing up the lunch and he was locking up the door and I said you're closing, it's only 2.30 we're closing for business wow we're closing the business for good

we brought out of food you've eaten so much we're shuttering the business now, Paul, did this happen? it was either this it Dave Berg's in the lighter side of if you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants

you can email us at doboyspodcast at gmail.com or leave us a voicemail at 830 Dogo that's 830-4636844 was the email from Brian from Kohog Brian the dog you mean? I mean, he didn't include

that level of identifying information oh wait, no, there is a PS here I love Lois, but Peter can never find out that's gotta be him that's gotta be him that could be any Lois to get the Doughboys double or weekly bonus episode

join the golden or platinum plate club at patreon.com and hey, there's something else you can do with your Patreon these days don't stop or will die the new podcast song a week which is what it sounds like a song a week

tell us about the new podcast tell us about the Patreon and anything else you would like to plug yeah, well, don't stop or will die we were like, hey, you know we love writing songs and we have actually a hard time figuring out which ones we're gonna put

towards an album or not and then we thought, you know what if we do a podcast where we do a song a week we get to put these songs out and have fun and get to be creative and yeah we just wanna share the music fun with folks, right Mikey?

yeah, it's songs exactly like Paul said, they could be on albums but instead we're just gonna pop one off a week and those are free wherever you get podcasts check out song a week, listen and subscribe there's two episodes out

by the time this Doughboys is coming out and we're releasing on Wednesdays and if you want on the Patreon you know how this goes Doughboys folks you can go and get the

songs as an mp3 download that way so it's like our own little iTunes over there you basically buy on a bucket track or you can even get other special surprises you get bonus episodes and you could even get your name

sung into sing song by us on one of the podcast episodes wow tons of goodies, it's a real hoot nanny yeah we're gonna and most of all just getting songs out exactly like Paul said we wanna get some music out there and uh

have a fun and silly time that doesn't constantly remind us of the challenges of the world around us we just have fun man that's right because Nick and Mitch are such sweethearts they also are letting us

play the second song that just came out yesterday at the end of this episode so thank y'all here's a little sneaky peeky that's right we're gonna play a little bit of that and guys thank you so much Mitch's mom I think would say yes peeking

she's allowing peeking for this one instance can you just get her to say that on mic real quick maa are you actually gonna get her to come down here I just gonna throw the vacuum next hahahaha oh my gosh for people who make drops

having your mom say no peeking on mic will just be a game changer wait no not landmine that's a goldmine we did that on a live show at some point but uh the uh we could have it on podcast quality here um

you guys can see right now in the zoom I went upstairs and she was uh mixing a cauldron and as you can see she turned me into a toad you look great I wasn't even gonna mention it you look amazing man uh by the way

I've added up um the uh the I had to kiss a lot of toads to meet my prince hahahaha I've uh I've added up the tally from the silly jar mm-hmm and it comes out to

three dollars hahahaha the least silliest number oh guys before we sign off that's a lot of dimes I know this is gonna be dated and everything but um before we sign off the state of carlsberg

is that in a dead heat it's even wow wow oh my this is shades of florida 2000 we're gonna donate that three dollars so if you see a donation hopefully to trump from dow boys that is what it's about did somebody say the

the strategy of florida 2000 oh no w I just want to thank mitch for that vote oh I should never have voted for you hey I wish you would have gotten yarrow hahahaha that'll do it for this episode of dow boys

until next time for the night spoon mic mitchell I'm nick weiger happy eating bye bye thank you I see a cactus here I see a cactus there I see a cactus here I see a cactus

there I think your look very handsome in this photo I think you look very handsome in this photo

I am a saver at heart I am a saver at heart I am a saver at heart I am a saver at heart

I think you look very handsome in this photograph photograph photograph On the next Doe Boys Double,

we're reopening up the feed bag. You song Lou returns as we field your questions and reply from the heart and from the gut. Get the Doe Boys Double every Tuesday only at patreon.com slash Doe Boys.