Doughboys - Carl’s Jr./Hardee’s 2 with Chris VanArtsdalen

Episode Date: May 11, 2017

Director, Birthday Boys member, and designer of the Doughboys logos Chris VanArtsdalen joins for a second discussion of fast food burger chain Carl’s Jr./Hardee’s, who recently revamped their famously lowbrow marketing campaign. Mitch, Wiger, and Chris dish about their shared histories and spiritual beliefs, and Chris takes a straightforward approach in another edition of Last Meal.Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We believe in putting hot models in our commercials, because ugly ones don't sell burgers. Those are the words of Andy Puzder, the former CEO of CKE Restaurants, who oversaw a decades-long fast-food ad campaign widely derided as sexist for its depictions of scannily-clad women mouthing messy burgers. Puzder would go on to become Donald Trump's top choice for labor secretary, the president and other man known for his openly misogynistic comments. Unlike our current commander-in-chief, Puzder's anti-woman behavior extended beyond mere words.

Prior to his corporate stewardship, he was a lawyer who specialized in fighting against reproductive rights. And after Puzder's ex-wife went public with accusations of spousal abuse, she claims he told her, quote, I will see you in the gutter. This will never be over. You will pay for this. And considering about 60% of food service workers are women, Puzder's oppressive 19th-century positions on labor rights are effectively misogynistic as well.

He's a fierce opponent of unions. He's voiced hostility to the very concept of the minimum wage, and is fantasized about replacing human workers with kiosks and robots. But an appropriate capstone for the wretched career of this truly vile man, he was humiliatingly denied confirmation as secretary of labor, too toxic for even the congressional Republicans who passed a bill stripping health insurance from 28 million Americans. And his legacy at CKE restaurants is now being erased in real time, as his lascivious commercials have been supplanted by a humorous campaign centered around the brand's senior and junior

namesakes that makes a point of saying goodbye to Puzder's cheesecake cheeseburger ads. Meanwhile, as workers' rights movements like Fight for 15 continue to gain influence, minimum wage increases past in 13 states in 2016. So is Puzder's burger chain, like America, better off without him? This week on Doughboys, we return to Carl's Junior Hardys. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants who are production of Feral Audio dot com. I'm Nick Weigar, alongside my co-host, recently banned from Fenway, the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell.

Oh my god. The roast was courtesy of Anna Mickelson, got a similar one also from At Lukey Waffles. And if you have a roast like me, use it on Mitch at the Top of the Show, roastspoonmanatgmail.com. Oh god, alright, I'm not even gonna, we won't even talk about it. Hey, there are asshole racists who live in Boston, that's for sure. Yeah. Anyways, to Spoon Nation, here we go, we got a little drop. Are you ready, Weigs?

Oh, I'm extremely ready. Hold onto your butt. It's a longer one. Not too long though. What the fuck? What's going on? What happened? Yikes.

Sorry there everyone, what the fuck? We got an oxcord for the first time, and it's really throwing you out for a loop. What the fuck? What the fuck is this? So did you play a drop, or did you play something from Spotify's Music to Study to playlist? Aaron, you told me, Aaron Stehly, S-T-E-H-L-E-Y, you said, Mitch, I made a drop with a story, it's short, and you're going to love it. So I play this drop, it's 55 seconds, it is just music, it's a previously on Doe Boys

at the top, it's a previously on Doe Boys at the top, and then it was just music. I'm Aaron Stehly at Aaron Stehly on Twitter. Maybe it's like the story he means is the one that we create in our heads as we're listening to that. Previously on Doe Boys. Yeah, no, this is it. I'm not sure that sometimes you drive, this is a good hour commute. What happened?

What the fuck happened? What happened? That's like the oxcord, the oxcord, where there's a channel missing or something, what the fuck? There's a googly in the oxcord. There's a googly. What the fuck? What is going on?

That's weird, Nick. I think you're weirded out by it because you heard the non-story version. I heard the non-story version. It played in our earphones. Everyone who's listening to this podcast heard that, and then you just played it directly into the microphone, and we got a different result. There's goolies loose? There's some sort of spirit.

It's some sort of an unruly spirit here haunting Palmerston. Should I play it? I'm sorry, and I really laid into Aaron. Should I play it, or should we do that then? Yeah, let's play the full version. Let's hear what's going on. Previously on Dope Boys. Isn't it true that sometimes you drive as a good hour commute with no radio on?

A serial killer. What are you doing? In my fridge at home, in my fridge at home, in our fridge at home, what happens when you open up the wagon? What do we see in there usually? You may see my weird friend and his weird gnarled mom. There was this kid who lived on my block, and one day I saw him pick up a worm. You made your dad do your fucking dirty work, fucking kills people, or eats someone, or...

Yeah. He didn't beat him to death. He beat him within an inch of his life. What does he look like? Yeah. I don't know, they need a better way of chopping these up into the right size. It's just a mess. It's very messy, and all the extras run all over the counter.

There's a lot in that fridge, yes. There it is. You know what, I maybe liked the music version. Our guest is very technically savvy. He was trying to tell us what was going on. I bet he can shed some light on what's going on here. He's director for FunnierDine. I see a member of the birthday boys, and the graphic designer behind the Doughboyz

logos. Chris Van Artsdale is here. Hi, Chris. Hey guys, thanks for having me. Thanks for joining us. Hey, we're closing out the birthday boys. Chris, you've closed the loop. Long overdue.

Long overdue. I'm a part of this podcast from the beginning, and also, there's something that we should say up top. Chris loved Togo's. Here we go. It's fucked up that we didn't have him on the Togo's episode. This is my fault. We gave it to Matty Smith.

Matty Smith had a story about Togo's. He had bitten to a screw at Togo's, and he wanted to do Togo's. And then afterwards, he told us, he was like, oh, I was really excited to tell that story. I don't think I did the best job telling that story. I think he did a good job. He did a good job telling the story. I think he was self-kind. Like, he'd sort of built it up as like, oh, this is my chance to share with the world

this moment. And I think he was worried he didn't hit a home run. Honestly, I listened to the episode. I thought it was great. I thought Matty did a great job, and it was way better than anything I would have said about Togo's. I just go there occasionally. I don't know.

You went there occasionally, and I think that we made a joke out of how much you loved Togo's. I think one time you asked at a birthday boys meeting, does anyone know what time Togo's closes? Yep. And we really gave you a hard time because we were like, why the fuck, you're the only person we know who goes to Togo's. Yeah, well, I'll tell you why Togo's is great because they have the wraps.

You can't get a wrap. Like, you know, it's a little healthier, a little less carb than Subway, so that's why I went there. The Subway, they were doing that flatbread for a while. What was it? Was it a flatbread or was it a wrap? What did they have that Subway? It never really worked that well.

Yeah, flatbread. It was like bad. It was just not as good as the sandwich. Not even close to as good as the sandwich. And I know, obviously, a wrap is always going to be inferior to a sandwich, but it's just like Subway. They didn't come close to making it something that's out of it. Then they now have like the folds, like the flatbread folds or whatever that they still

kind of do, right? I think that they still do those flap. I think some people swear by those flatbreads, but I've never really had it. Subway was the other place when we were working up at the birthday boys house. Actually, the episode that we're talking about today, we're revisiting a place, but there were a few spots around the birthday boys house when Chris and I and all those guys were working up there together, and it was, Togo's was one of them, and I never went there once.

Then there was Subway, Paquito Moss, Salsa Bar, which is just a local place. Pepe's Pizza, Fat Burger. Those places, I feel like we went to. I feel like it was like Salsa Bar, Subway, Paquito Moss, or Carl's Jr. was the other big one. I feel like those are all the big ones. Sometimes Panda Express, Lowways Down, or In-N-Out Burger, why didn't we go to In-N-Out Burger more?

Much better than everything else we had. We didn't want to drive like one block. Yeah. It was literally just a block away. Sometimes that particular In-N-Out Burger too, that one is a fucking shit show. Yeah. It was a big enough parking lot, and then that drive-thru can take forever. I went to a work lunch there with our buddy Courtney Davis was in that work lunch posse

who was previously on. She was on back in the Olympics episode. That's right. But one of those awful episodes is not her fault, but we went to that In-N-Out Burger, and it was just like such an ordeal. We had to park up in the neighborhood, and then walk down, and then it was just like, and we ate. Worked party for what?

We worked on this show for a couple weeks. Oh, that's right. Yeah. That we'll never see the light again. At Universal, where you were working at? We were working right by there. Yeah. Not actually at Universal, but one of the buildings by there, but it was just such an ordeal,

and it's just like that. I love In-N-Out Burger so much, but some of their locations- Yeah, we fucking know. Some of their locations could use a bigger parking lot. That's a fair criticism. How is In-N-Out always so fucking crowded, always, always crowded? Because it's great. It's good.

It's easy. Yeah. They just need more locations. I mean, if they did the McDonald's thing and had an In-N-Out on every corner, then- But there even still is a lot of them. It's not like there's quite a few In-N-Out's, you know what I mean? There's an In-N-Out that's close by here. There's two that I can think of that are nearby, and I'm like, it's still just as convenient

as McDonald's or something to me. You know what I mean? Right. I think what it is is, I think they partly like having locations that are just packed. I think that's probably part of their marketing, because they don't do TV advertising or anything. They do some radio advertising. They do some billboards, but they have a very small marketing campaign. I think part of it is like, oh, you see In-N-Out Burger, you see there's all these people there,

and you're like, oh, what is that place? I got to check it out. That buzz, I think, is kind of contagious. And then you get all that Christian shit on the wrappers. Hell yeah. Right, Chris? John 316, baby. Is that on the bottom of it?

I think that might be. Yeah, that's on one of them. For God's so loved the world that he gave his only son to something. What the hell? You're the guy who knows the least, I think. I grew up religious, man. Oh, that's right. That's right.

Wait, so where did you grow up and how religious in what way? Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. Got it. Went to... Oh, little town of Bethlehem. Yep. The Christmas city in Pennsylvania went to church every Sunday when I was living at home. What denomination was this?

Presbyterian. Okay. Yeah, so, and now I'm atheist, so I'm, you know, I'm out of it, but... Pendulum has swung the other direction. It's really dead, yeah. Once you... Chris, I'm going to take you to church next week. I want to go back.

I mean, I wish I could, I actually wish I could believe again. It's so comforting, but, you know, it's a weird thing to bring up, but... I think that church, whether you believe in God or whatever or not, I don't go ever, but I think that it is, every time I go, it's very comforting. Yeah. It can be very nice to just sit there and, and especially if it's not crowded, if it's just like, like a mass where there's not a lot of people there and you sit on the bench and you just listen and you sit and it can be very, it can actually be very nice.

Yeah. It's a great social group. I mean, you meet friends there and people you see every week and are they weird though? Maybe not. Certainly, certainly though, a more wholesome Sunday afternoon than going to brunch and drinking alcohol. You know what? I'm not a big alcohol brunch guy either, though.

Yeah. Sundays on Sunday, that's over. I'm feeling like shit. I agree. You do mimosas. I feel like, here's the thing. Go for it. This is, maybe this is problematic.

It's all guys on here, so I shouldn't say the statement. I feel like brunching is, is more of a female to male thing. I feel like, I feel like, I feel like women like to brunch more than guys do. Mitch, are you saying... I think that's true. Are you saying women be brunching? Women be brunching, I say. Oh, there's a drop.

I think that, I wonder if that's true or if that's one of those things where people are just making that assumption based off of like social media. If that's, that's like, because, like, you know, because sometimes there are these things where it's like perception is not actually what reality is. I feel like everyone enjoys brunch. I mean, brunch is good. I just like, like drinking, I don't know. I'm not a big day drinker or like a big morning drinker.

You're saying it seems like more of a social thing for a group of women to be like, oh, well, let's go have mimosas together versus like a bunch, a group of guys instead are going to all get together to watch the game. Yeah. It's like a different sort of activity. Now that I'm older, I feel like I'm, I'm not a, but I feel like in the past, especially I would wake up on Sunday and be like hungover. And it would be like noon or one or something.

And I wouldn't want to go and drink a mimosa or even a Bloody Mary. I wouldn't want any alcohol. I feel like I would just feel like shit. Yeah. I love brunch, but I'm so addicted to coffee that I just get a coffee immediately. I don't really go for the alcohol. Yeah. You're a big coffee nut.

Huge coffee. I mean, yeah, I'm addicted. The guy has a coffee nut. So wait, so what kind of coffee, like what, are you just someone who just homebrews? Are you someone who you have a specific thing you like to get? I do everything. I mean, right now I actually got a red eye right here, which is coffee plus a shot of espresso because I was so nervous about coming to do the podcast with you guys.

I'm so impressed by you guys and the empire you built. Chris, you were there from the bottom level with us. I know. The logo you made, I think you've put more effort into that logo than we ever have into this podcast. I'm wearing the logo right now. Yeah. You should charge me for every day I wear the shirt.

I you'll be getting a bill from my lawyer very soon. Lev? Lev Ginsburg? Is Lev my lawyer? I don't know. He's also mine. Who the birthday boy's lawyer is. We kind of share lawyers and rotate them around.

Chris, it's funny, you know, you love coffee. I think a thing that people know about you is you're very laid back. Yeah, you have a like, you know, your monotone, but you're very kind of like a quiet, laid back guy, unflappable. I think I call you. OK, that's good. Thank you. So you need coffee.

You also, like me, I'd say of the birthday boys, you and I both sleeping issues the most. Yeah. Would you say that's correct? Yeah. Oh, I'm a total night owl. I will sleep in until if I don't force myself to get out of bed, I'll sleep till noon, afternoon, easily. And and Chris and Chris has a contraption.

Is this OK if I tell this? Yeah, I don't know what your your alarm clock. Remember at the birthday? Oh, yeah. It would be this. It was this thing that like shook the bed. Yeah, my mom got me almost as a gag, like an alarm clock for deaf people that would shake the bed.

And I started using it for real. It actually does wake you up. And sometimes you wouldn't wake up when you wake up when sometimes you wouldn't wake up or I think maybe you wouldn't be there. We'd be like, what the fuck is going on? This buzzing vibrate like it felt like there was an earthquake or something. Yeah, those were nights when I slept over at a chicks place, dude. Hell yeah.

Yeah, I only remember it happening like once. Yeah, once a year once a year. The birthday boys were pretty cool. And and Chris, to go back to Togo's for a second, you and I wrote up this. You like Togo so much that you and I wrote up this little sketch. Yeah, that you one time did at a birthday boy show about how much you loved Togo's. Yeah, thanks for writing that little monologue for me, man. I think that was mostly you kind of like giving me something to do.

I was was in my mind. I'm like did I was like you went to Togo's a couple times and then I may be overreacted and wrote up a big bit about how much you loved Togo's, which was basically what was it? It was just you on stage saying how much you love Togo's and you had a slide show of Togo's. I started doing a monologue and then it gets interrupted somehow. Like I don't even remember. Like, do you remember?

I've no wasted years. I remember this bit because I remember you doing a monologue, which you like the birthday boys period didn't do a lot of monologues. And then Chris, you're more like I think you your role in the the group. I think you'd accurately say is like you do a lot of the directing and you do a lot of the visual effects, a lot of the the the amazing wizardry that the birthday boys have and the visual style of the birthday boy sketches you're responsible for. But you don't necessarily perform as much as the other members of the group

necessarily. And so it was like both a monologue and then a monologue with with you was like, I remember that like standing out and I remember it being about Togo's, but I don't remember the details of what happened at it. Yeah, there was a video and then somehow the video is interrupted. By, you know, you know what it was? I think it started out with a parody of like a law and order called law and order. And then it gets that that help video is taped over with my Togo's monologue or something.

Oh, we probably shouldn't talk about this because none of us remember. Nick saw it, not a memorable bit, apparently. I feel like it was a good bit at the time. It was a good bit. I remember laughing a lot. I remember being like, Oh, it's law and order. I do not remember. There was a fake law and order logo that was law and order with like stink lines coming off of it.

That was going to be the parody and then that gets interrupted by something. What a wasted. Wow. Are you wasted years? There's nothing more also to like we're older now so we can reflect on how much of a waste of our time doing those live sketch shows for, you know, 100 person audiences that we can barely remember and just the hours of writing and rehearsal that go into one of those 30 minute shows. In our 20s, we were literally every Friday night.

We were just like throughout the week, we were preparing to go to perform at Not Too Shabby. Yeah. For like almost all of our 20s. Yep, totally. And Nick, you're right that I was always more considered myself more the director and I consider myself a director now. And I was always trying to just make a video every month for the monthly show. That was kind of my main goal, just get a video made in the can right every month. So which now feels like the most daunting.

If you're like, we have to make a video and we got to make it in a month. I'd like to do a video for Armin's 420 show and nobody really was into it. No, yes, like a fuck it. Hey, we're sad older men now. But we had a lot of great times together, Chris, and a lot of eating, too. That's right. And one of those big spots, Chris, were you were you big? I think you were a big Carl's guy because because Jeff, myself and you,

I think were maybe the Carl's was a go to for me, you know, on a late night, drinking night, you know, good drunk food, right? Love just a solid burger. I think it's great. Carl's is a is great drunk food. And I feel like that drive through is like one of the most dangerous places in all of LA, especially the one where the near where the birthday boys lived, which is on which is a Ventura, Ventura, Boulevard or like Lankersham and

Coinga. It's kind of great where it turns into Ventura, basically. Yeah. You mean because people get riled up in that drive through? Yeah, there's so many drunk people driving through that drive through. And it was you could just tell late at night. Not a fun place to be. And there's the people coming out of Universal Studios. Oh, sure.

That is that's is why. But I think that city walk crowd. I think there might be something to your theory, because the Carl's Jr. by my place, and I should mention, you know, I know a lot of our audiences in Hardy's country, Carl's Jr. and Hardy's are effectively one chain now. There's a different branding depending on which side of the Mississippies or the Rockies, whatever the dividing line is for.

Whatever that wherever the Carl's Jr. Hardy's meridian is in the U.S. Whatever side you're on, if you hear Carl's Jr., you can just substitute Hardy's for it, because it's all the same shit. But so a lot of people like when they drive by that line, they like they just like feel it. Yeah, like Hardy's country. You on Hardy's land now, boy.

Things are different here. That's how you'll usually see an old man who says that as you drive over the line. She shoots a shotgun in the air. So yeah, but the Carl's Jr. by my place. This is very strange. A lot of a lot of places close the dining room late at night and only keep the drive through open. They close the drive through at 10 p.m.

And the dining room is only open until like 2 a.m. when they close. Interesting. And I wonder if it is the same sort of thing. If they're just so used to drunks going through there that they're like, you know what, we can handle it a little better if we get them inside. It's too much of a while. It's also down in Santa Monica.

I feel like the drive throughs can be a little bit more tricky. Not as much space. There's like some there's some drive throughs that are a little trickier down in the Santa Monica area. Yeah, definitely. I mean, there's some there's some narrow alleyways there that the jack in the box in particular up on Wilshire, which is turning into a Del Taco, which I'm pretty excited about.

But that is a very, very narrow drive through. But the Wyger News. So a Doughboys listener sent that to me. They said someone took a photograph of the permit on the outside of the jack in the box that said that it was going to be that it's going to have an architectural revision and the architectural revision photo showed at Del Taco that they were inserting this jack in the box. Hey, that's that's right by Slenny McClain's, right?

It's right by there. Yeah. Yeah, I used to I remember going to that jack in the box. That's also the jack in the box where they shot the the curb and curb your enthusiasm where Larry has a jumbo jack with like a homeless guy or whatever or a drunk guy. Oh, yeah. That yeah, so that's that same jack in the box.

Question for you. Cool. I would go to that. I would be at Sunday McClain's when I was like 22 or 23 or whatever. And I would drink there all day and I go to that jack in the box. And then sometimes I'd sleep in my car right down there by that jack in the box until the next morning. Yes.

If you want a little glimpse into the piece of shit I was. But that's funny that I kind of respect that though, because that he shows you got grit that you can just sleep in your car. I'm too delicate. I have to like get to a comfy bed. Oh, really? What? Yeah.

Oh, no, I was I mean, I was I would be endangering people if I drove. I feel like that's very responsible of you call. Yeah, sure. I don't know. There was probably plenty of times I wasn't responsible, but I can I can I can sleep in my car if I need be. I remember when when when birthday boys was at its peak, I remember driving back from the Simpsons and I needed to go into my place and I stopped in front of my

house and I fell asleep in my car for an hour. And then I woke up and just drove to birthday boys house. I could I can just I guess I can I guess it's not a good thing to be to easily fall asleep in your car. I can't send it a few times. I can't do it. There's that I just can't. Unless I'm lying down.

I've tried because I'm like you guys. I have I have sleep problems, which is of a different sort. I have I have insomnia and I tend to wake up like super early and then can't back get back to sleep. But I I can't sleep basically in anything that's not a bed. Sometimes on a couch, I can fall asleep. But for the most part, if it's not a bed, I can't sleep at all. Have you ever actually this this ties into fast food a little bit.

Have you ever been driving like when I when I went to Ithaca, which Chris went to as well at the college upstate New York. It's a six hour drive or so for me from from Boston area from Quincy to Ithaca. And have you ever had it where you're tired and falling asleep on the road? I get sleepy, but I don't feel like I'm ever going to lose consciousness. I'm just like, oh, I'm so tired now and I'm having trouble focusing. But I don't feel like I'm about to pass out. But if that does happen, I'm a guy I'll crank up the AC and I'll like turn on

the radio and I'll put like I'll put some Altoids in my mouth. Like I'll I won't have any I don't feel like maybe partly because of that. But I never feel like I'm going to lose consciousness. Yeah, the same way you hit all of them. I think I think rolling I rolled out my window a lot because it would be like zero degrees and right, it would force you to wake up. But there were like, I remember like trying to do that on like an hour of sleep, trying to do that ride.

And I was like, like, like thinking that I was going to fall asleep at any second. It was it was terrifying. And I think that fast food is also like helpful. I feel like if you're I'm not sure now how trucking is or whatever. But I feel like like, right. Isn't that like those guys must eat fast food or constantly? Yeah, it's got to be a big part of your night. Oh, man, I think fast food makes you tired.

That's got to be if you get like a gigantic Coke, though, I feel like that's such a big part of get of getting fast food. Well, sure. Yeah. Yeah, just the caffeine you're taking from something. You're right, though. They did like a Carlsberger will like put you to sleep. I think which I think was kind of the case for me last night when I when I eat this burger and Nick, I want to sorry.

Oh, I was just going to say, I dream about being a trucker. That's kind of like a fantasy of mine and I would just get eggs. I would get diner food more than fast food. Yeah, I feel like that's protein. That's a whole other. This is a dream of yours. It's I know it's a fantasy. Just be a trucker and get out there on the road.

I think it'd be fun as hell. And then that beautiful dream is shattered when your bed starts shaking. We're saying alarm contraption. Oh, God, I like driving. I feel like that, like, I mean, like that is that's intense driving. Yeah, and I think us being saying if there's any truckers that listen to this or they'll hate us and be like, it's a much, much harder job than what you guys. I mean, first of all, I couldn't drive a truck even probably 10 feet.

Yeah, I think it's a hard job. I mean, like a lot of it, too, just like maneuvering that car, backing it up. Oh, my God, there's some there's some tricky maneuvers. You have driven a lot of trucks in Grand Theft Auto 5 and I always, you know, the trailer unattaches. Oh, yeah, flips over and you don't even have to work a double clutch in those. You're just using the Xbox controller. Nick, you ever you ever you ever talk you ever get on the CB and talk to truckers?

Breaker, Breaker 10, four. Wow. Niner. Holy shit. This is a little lags driving down the I five. If there's any cuties out there who could take a ride in my caboose. Little little give me a give me a 10 to on the on your six and I'll dial you in. So you want you're basically offering any cuties.

Which I don't know what that means to to drive in the back of your truck. Yeah, it's going to give him a lift in the back of my truck with the with all the sorghum I'm hauling to Kansas City. Sorghum. Sorghum is one of those things. I have no idea what it is. I've heard it many times, but it's some sort of agricultural product. OK, and how many cuties, quote unquote, are in the back of this truck?

Is it filled with cuties, there's piles upon piles of cuties? They're not cuties. No more cuties that look like Mitch, I assume. There's not a lot of truckers that don't look like Mitch. That's true. You know, if I'm proud of to be have the trucker look. Yeah, what are you going to say if there are any truckers out there? Yeah, if there are any truckers out there, give us a shout. A hashtag Hong Kong.

Hashtag Hong Kong. What were you going to say? No, I like I didn't have anything. I was going to try it. I was going to start to say Roger and see if that landed on anything. But I think Hong Kong is good. And if you're not a trucker, hashtag. Me. Me.

And good luck spelling that. I remember with my with my Nissan Altima. Oh, no, I'm sorry. The Ford Escort that I had like my first car. Like it was like the most pussy horn. Sorry, that's kind of vulgar, but it was. It was like that, like I would honk at people. Like if someone cut me off, I thought, fuck.

And I'd be like, yeah. And then like they look at me and be like, you fucking asshole. Like my horn was so bad that I would be embarrassed to beep at someone. Even if it was their fault, like it was it was such a shitty little honk that I was I would be embarrassed to be. So I just always let people cut me off and do whatever they wanted to. I got bossed around. My mom had a Toyota Paseo when I was a kid

and that was the same similar thing. It had one of those it's just like a very weak, wimpy horn. Yeah, what? What is that? I don't know why they design it. They design that sometimes because it makes it and makes you more averse to honking. Do they just know like like guys like you and I? Like they're like, let's just give this sucker like the weakest horn.

He's not going to raise any issues with anyone. Well, this is my mom's car. Maybe that was the issue is that it kind of been like they're just sort of like, oh, this is a car that I don't know. Maybe they're like, oh, this is a mom's car. And maybe she wants something a little less aggressive. Maybe that was the thing behind the Ford Escort you owned. Yeah, I don't know.

I have no idea what the intended market for Ford Escort literally. I went into a 7-Eleven once or a Dairy Mart and my friends who were with me. This is high school. Literally lifted up the Ford Escort and turned it around. They like like it was like four guys. Wow. They literally lifted. Like I'm like, that's like that's like not a car.

You know what I mean? Like that's crazy that I was even driving in that car. This was amazing. This was four of your this was for your like high school friends. So this is like Skeeter and Gas Can and Millhouse and Jumbo. It was Micas, I think probably Chankton, Frailbott and Kev Weeks, which I guess Weeksy Weeksy.

I mean, I never called them Weeksy. Right. These guys athletes, did they like place? Kev was an athlete. Kev was a big dude. I'm amazed they could pick up a car. Yeah, that's I mean, I guess it's just like enough strength. You can do that. And then it's also just sort of like that prankster. It's like when a when a when a mom sees her kid

like pinned under something, she gets that supernatural strength. The same sort of thing when you've got like an epic prank. Yeah, was frail sort of like adrenaline just channeling through your body. Was Frailbott's kid caught under the car? Frailbott's kid Tommy was not born yet, but he would be born. Maybe he was thinking about him. Who knows? That's probably what it was. He was mentally picturing his kid.

Frailbott is actually Frailbott's origin is that he we used to call him a robot like you, much like you. Oh, cool. I bet we get along. All right, Chris, let's talk about Carl's Junior. All right. So what is your I mean, you are a fan of this chain. This is a thing we talked about. And part of the reason we're talking about this is that they have a new burger in the news, but it's also this is one of those ones where it's a bigger chain.

Carl's Junior Hardee's is one of the I think one of the top 10 chains in North America, maybe top 15. It's somewhere in that range. And we haven't covered this since I think like episode six or seven. We covered this very early on in the podcast since then, you know, we have a lot of new listeners. So I figured it was one that was worth revisiting. So but but what is your experience beyond just sort of, you know, going near going when you guys were rehearsing for the birthday boys?

Well, first of all, are you going to do an introduction for for Carl's Junior? I did. I did. This was a point of contention in our last episode. Yeah, here's what here's the issue. OK, our engineer, Stephen Ray, I think we actually couldn't we have. We have a situation where he has to to go like right after we're done recording. So I recorded my intro while I was while we were waiting for you to come. Oh, so I can't wait to hear it. I'm just a fan of the intros.

Oh, thanks, buddy. And the drops. He told me earlier that he loves the drops. I hate the drops. I was expecting to get a lot of information I could use from the introduction. Well, you know, it was centered on Andy Puzder, who was the CEO who you may have known was was Trump's pick for Secretary of Treasury. Oh, I did not know that. Yeah. And then he was self disqualified himself because basically it was clear

that he was not going to get a vote in the Senate. He was not going to be confirmed because he has all the shady shit in his past. He didn't fill out the proper forms and he's been accused of spousal abuse. And so he's a real piece of shit. Cool. He is a real piece of shit. You know what I got to say about Puzder? Well, I'll get into that in a second. But I just want to quickly go back.

Nick, you talked about how the carls would would close down. Yeah. And you're not going to the woods, which is funny, because I feel like there's some diners and stuff in Santa Monica that don't close. But for me, carls is always the place that you can always get food. Like it never, ever, ever closes. And I've told the story on here before, right? The day of Thanksgiving, like Thanksgiving morning, I got carls, Jr. I remember after being at the birthday boy's house and being hung over,

like sleeping on their couch or something. But it's a place that like never I feel like in that sense, they are they never shut down ever. Like I think Christmas Eve, they're open. Yeah. And maybe maybe Christmas Day is the only day that they close. There are a lot of fast food joints, though, that are open like every day. But I think carls is like one of the they were they were kind of like the what's it called the the front of the pioneers. Thank you. Pioneers in that area where they just were always, always open.

I mentioned this on the Doe Boys double episode we did with you song when we were answering answering listener emails. But I went to Carls, Jr. on 9 11. That's right. Yeah, that was like my first meal after I after like I was at work. I was on my way to work, heard the news on the bus, got to work, we like got sent home early. And then I went to Carls, Jr. with my roommate. And you said, phew, I'm glad I wasn't caught.

And then you ordered. Wait a minute. You're describing culpability for 9 11 to me. I don't know. I've been involved. I don't know. I was guilty when you said that. You're doing this classic thing of like, what? I'm just asking questions. I am just asking questions.

Well, no, Mitch, I had nothing to do with 9 11. OK, there's your answer. OK, good. All right. You denied it pretty quick. I mean, like the fact that you had to deny it kind of says something. All right. Um, yeah, that's that is the saddest. That is that is such a and we shouldn't make light of it.

It's very sad. Nick Chris and I were up in New York, upstate New York would happen. But still that is like the combo of Carls, Jr. Onto that is a sad, sad day. Right. Yeah, it's a very it's a very sad situation. And Puzder is he's a huge piece of shit. Yeah. And, you know, he's he's a guy who is contributes to that evil world of of of politics.

And there are a lot of evil men in the fast food industry and the chain restaurant industry. I mean, that's just the nature. I mean, that's just capitalism. But among them, he is one of the worst. He's there with Papa John of just one of these guys who's not just a complete, you know, asshole is trying to enrich himself. But also someone who's doing it on the backs of their own workforce.

And like, is angry at their own workforce for demanding fair compensation, like thinks that that's they don't deserve it, that they're rats. I wish I could get rid of them. And you're big $15 an hour guy for minimum wage, right, Nick? Yeah, absolutely. We both are. Yeah, I think that's a very that seems like a very straightforward thing. That I think if you check polling, like people universally agree on that. I think the majority is across the country in favor of $15 minimum wage.

Here's another. Here's something that will that will age us. My first job, 525 an hour, right? Was my was my first my first working job. Yeah, minimum wage used to be pretty low. I mean, it's not much of a job right now. It was as a like, I worked in a field. I basically like cut down to like thorns and and poison ivy and bushes. It was like it like it like a like a part of the parks department.

Basically. Oh, OK. And so like they would give us weed whackers and like you would go out into like like where baseball fields were and stuff Massachusetts much more green than than California, even though they're you know, you got to do it here, too. But we we we would just go into like brush and cut stuff out and and yeah. And there was this guy butch, this older man butch, who like his attitude was like, I don't want you to be like me. Like it shouldn't be like me, but he was just kind of like an asshole to us.

The cautionary tale. He like if butch could see it now. God damn it, Mitch. I told you not to be like me. I need to listen to how exactly like me butch was he always gave it a hard time. I mean I was like a little weird kid. So he was I was like what the fuck like like like I would say weird stuff. Yeah. And then butch was like very nice because one time we were I was in the back

of the parks department truck and he like peeled out and I truly fell out of the truck like I tumbled out of the back of the truck like on to the ground and he was like holy fucking shit. Like he was so scared. I killed a kid and he was like okay. And then like was was like much much much nicer to me from there. I like was just like don't tell anybody. It was like one of those situations where he just didn't want me to tell.

I wouldn't tell anyone. I didn't care. Did he try to back over you to finish the job? He should have dove out of the way. Do it butch powered. I don't know what butch is up to now. I heard that he's dead. So rest in peace butch if you're dead if you're alive.

Hey, that's pretty sweet. That's funny. Yeah. That's not that's not funny. That's not funny. That's not funny at all. No, I would be very sad if butches is has passed away if he's alive. I hope he is alive and that's great.

But if someone told me they had passed away but I'm not sure if they knew. It was a guy who I used to work with on the parks department. So fingers crossed for old butch. Butch hang in there. Butch hang in there or rest in peace or rest in peace. Anyways, as far as Jesus Christ, that's dark. I don't want to make light of this man. I don't think you were making light of this man.

Okay, all right. It's all part of life, baby. I mean, Jesus, atheist shit you got going on. It's all fine, man. We're all like the trees like knocking down those trees in the parks. That's like a person dying every day. Is that what you're trying to say? We're going to be worm man.

We're just going to be worm food. We're freaking worm food. We're just meat. We're backs. We're sacks of meat with a ghost trapped inside. That's exactly what I was going to say. That's why that's atheists. They think we're trash.

They think we're sacks of meat with a ghost stuck inside. My understanding of atheism is that they still believe in ghosts. Yeah, listen to the Richard Dawkins talk about the ghost sack theory. Oh, ghost sack. Yeah, that's scary. Richard Dawkins. With a ghost. Richard Dawkins, I feel like is someone Mitch you toss in the whole shit pit.

He feels like he's in that sort of smug atheist scientist sort of. I don't like anyone who's smug. If they're Christian or if they're atheist or whatever, I guess like agnostic is maybe the way I go where I'm just like, who knows what the hell? Who knows anything? I mean, like, I think he's a good Catholic boy though. I am a man.

I'm, I'm, I'm, but I'm not, but I don't go to church. You know what I mean? Like I just raised Catholic or whatever. I'd like for me, I, I, I fall more into like, yes, I believe in science. I believe the world is round and the Big Bang started at all. I believe in the Big Bang theory. I do. I believe in, you know, I believe in the show back when I was a CBS page.

No one, no one believed in that show. Do you know that really? I was a lot of it to hold out. I was at the up fronts for that. I worked as a CBS page. Yeah, they like really roasted Big Bang theory. They're like, why do you think this show will work? Like they didn't think it was going to work and then it became the biggest show

of one of the biggest shows of all time. Mitch, you're the one person within CBS who believed in the Big Bang. I was the one person who believed in the Big Bang theory. I said, everyone lay off. This is going to be a hit and they said, quiet you page. And I said, no, trust me on this one. And if it did become a hit and I didn't, I didn't benefit from it in any way. All right.

We'll put it on the air. God damn, just stop crying. Anyways, I want to talk about Puzder quickly. Yes. Okay. He's an asshole. He's not a good guy. He's worse than, you know what?

He's worse than any of the guys who I give shit for like Bill Nye or whatever who are right, who are in the right. They're in the right side of things. They just are annoying. You're more annoyed by approach, not beliefs. Yes. Puzder, I will say the one thing that I will say, he was just recently on. Did you see the vice special that talked about fast food in other countries?

It was great. I thought it was really good and talks about how and like the obesity epidemic has gotten really bad in other countries. And Puzder was the only person willing to sit down and talk with vice. And I liked that he sat down and talked with the body. You know, he's still like an asshole and is a piece of shit. Can I also just throw in the original founder of Hardee's was convicted of insider trading. So he was kind of a piece of shit too.

And he had like tons of kids, very weird guy. This is Wilbur Hardy, right? This is Karcher. Oh, Carl Karcher, because Carl Karcher founded Carl's Junior. They were at one point separate chains that merged. So I think Wilbur Hardy founded Hardee's and Carl Karcher founded Carl's Junior. Gotcha. Hey, so we those guys maybe are nicer than Puzder, right?

Even though Chris just said this one guy was bad. I think Karcher might have been weird too, but yeah, those were definitely more. I mean, probably again, they had pretty retrograde beliefs by our standards, considering there were guys who built their businesses in the 1950s. But I think they were definitely not as monstrous outwardly as Puzder. But did you have more you want to say on that, Mitch? No, no, just it's a really good watch. If people get a chance to check it out, they talk about how much it's crazy

what's happening with fast food over there in just different countries. And it's kind of, it's that weird thing of like, oh, it's terrible. People are, you know, there's diabetes and people are like, there's a huge obesity issue. But at the same time, it's like, oh, well, then also like affordable food. I don't know, you know, it's a tricky thing. They love it. Yeah. I actually brought some facts.

When McDonald's opened in Kuwait, there was a line that was seven miles long. Seven miles? That's insane. Yeah. That's insane. To just, like you would work off the meal in the weight in line. And that's Kuwaiti Sun for sure. That's insane.

Wow. Yeah. And you know, like a lot of these dry countries or whatever. How many, I don't know if there's a ton of dry countries, but places where they don't allow alcohol, like a drinking that like, you know, on Friday and Saturday night, people go to these, go to fast food chains. I don't, I mean, I don't remember it very well, but just watch the vice episode. Instead of going out to like clubs, they'll go to like Carl's Junior or whatever or McDonald's

and they'll go and they'll eat with friends. And that is like going out on a Friday night. Right. Yeah. And that's kind of, you've watched something and then you kind of remember it and describe it to us. Much like we kind of remembered that Togo sketch that we did years ago. I think the problem is our, the problem is our rotten brains.

Yes. My brain is wrought. Mine is too. I have trouble remembering a lot of things that have happened in my life. You and I have that in common. Right. We're, we're losing our minds. Yeah.

You get older and then your brain just gets ossified and just like, there's just too much stuff in there. It's like that whole thing that, that I, there's like that kind of that apocryphal story of the, you know, the Zen master showing how, you know, like to how much, how you can store stuff in your brain by having a glass. I can't even, I can barely remember this thing I'm trying to relay. But you did remember apocryphal. So that's a good one.

You have like a glass that you're like, you know, you try to like, okay, how much information can you put in your brain and then you pour a bunch of liquid into the glass and then you reach a certain point where it's full and then it's like, if you just keep pouring, you don't get more information. Just everything spills out. Yeah. The same sort of thing happens to your brain. That's why I stopped trying to learn about 10 years ago, stopped learning any new facts.

That's good. Just sort of rooted yourself right in time in like 2007. You know, I, I get so kind of like, I will talk to someone and be like, like, if I'm going to see like a, like, I won't say like a cousin, but if I'm going to see a cousin, I'm like, what's that person's like, what, like wife's name. Right. And I know it, but I'm so, I feel like my brain is such a mush that I need to just be sure that I know it.

Like I won't say when I see people in public, I know their names. Right. And I'm so afraid to say their name because I feel like my brain is such a mush that I've just forgotten it. Yeah. What's up buddy? Good to see you. Hey man.

How's it going? Oh, you use the buddy all the time. I lean on the buddy a lot. You know what the other, the other move I find myself doing sometimes, if I think I know someone's name, but I'm not fully confident in it, is that it'll kind of like half say their name. So it's just like, Hey, how's it going, Duh? You know, just sort of like, sort of swallow it a little bit. So if I'm wrong, it's not like a huge like swing.

Yes. It probably makes it worse because it makes it clear that I don't really know your name. Just be clear. And then I get it wrong. That's even worse. And that story, the guy's name was dog. I was trying to say dog. It's a dog.

Oh, dog. Um, that, that's, that my story is about Kuwait, Chris, which there is, there is no drinking in Kuwait. Yeah. But it's got like every fast food chain, like every chain restaurant is in Kuwait. I think partly because of the, or I don't know exactly, but I think at the Gulf War one, there were a lot of American servicemen there. And I think that that was part of, there was a lot of American investment around that time.

That's just my assumption based on what, what I kind of know the, of that region. Um, let's take a quick break. We'll be right back with more dog boys. Hey, Mitch, you don't like to cook, but you love to eat. That's true. Well, you know what? At HelloFresh, they want to change the way people eat forever. Everyone deserves honest, natural, healthy food and fresh ingredients and making magic

in the kitchen. HelloFresh is the meal kit delivery service that makes cooking fun, easy and convenient. It is. So I don't like to cook and I don't also don't like to, I don't like to choose, Nick. That's my issue, but HelloFresh, they have a bunch of box options. They currently offer our customers a classic box or a veggie box and they'll be launching a family box soon enough. I don't know if that's worth it for us, two men who will never have a family.

Um, but we eat like a family. We eat like a family. That's just customers can order three, four or five different meals per week designed for either two or four people. For me, I'd probably order the four person one for myself. New recipes are created every single week. Each week, HelloFresh creates delicious recipes, new delicious recipes with step-by-step instructions that are designed to take around 30 minutes for everyone from novices to season home cooked

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I'm getting everything I need. It's perfect. Right. It's perfect. They've shipped us a couple of HelloFresh things. My wife made one. She made one of the HelloFresh meals and it was quite tasty. I made one as well.

Lolly and Irma, my cats got up on the counter as I was putting it together. That doesn't seem sanitary at all. It does not. No, I should have, I should put them in a room when I try to make something, but I enjoyed it very much. It was a great experience. We got a little promo code for you for all you guys listening out there. All you got to do is you can get $35 off your first week of deliveries at HelloFresh.com.

You're just going to enter the promo code DOBOYS35 when you subscribe. DOBOYS35 and that stands for 35 as the age Nick was a decade ago. So check that out. HelloFresh.com, enter DOBOYS35 for $35 off your first week of deliveries. Welcome back to DOBOYS. Talking Carl's Jr. Hardys with Chris Feddard Stalen. So let's get into the chain.

The big thing at Carl's Jr. Hardys right now, this is one of the things they're advertising with their new campaign. The third pound baby back rib thick burger. Let me read the description for the menu here. Charbroil to 100% black Angus beef patty, boneless baby back ribs, Mississippi honey barbecue sauce, crispy fried onions, and pickles on a premium bun. The premium bun being something without sesame seeds, kind of like that sort of, it's not quite a brioche.

Well, how would you describe that roll? Just kind of like a nice roll. I feel like Carl's is in that same area that Wendy's, where I just complained about Wendy's changing their bun. I feel like they're changing up their bun all the time. They're doing some to the bun, but I can't quite describe it. It's like a little, it's kind of got a little butter on it, maybe? What is it exactly?

They did fresh baked buns. Right. It was like their big thing for a while. And I still think that that is what it is. Like I think it's, I think that they pride themselves in these fresh baked buns. But yeah, it's, I guess brioche is a good way to describe it. It's not quite though. It's not that thick.

That's the wrong term for it. It's not bad, honestly. Yeah. It's not a bad bun. Carl's kind of reminds me of Burger King a little bit. Is that, do you think that's in the neighborhood of Burger King? Yeah. To me, it's like a step up from Burger King.

It's the same sort of genre. I agree with you. It's definitely better than Burger King. It is kind of like, like Burger King, I think it's kind of actively, it's going for things that are high calorie and overloaded and not good for you. Like they're not pretending at all that any of this is healthy at all. Which I really liked about, when we talked about it the first time, I was like, oh, I like that Carl's just digs into the fact that it's not good for you.

I think it's that broiled taste with Carl's too, Chris, is what you get. It's got the grill marks on it, whether it's actually grilled or not. There's a flame that kisses this burger or whatever, which is a Burger King thing too. Burger King was always my go-to as a kid. I loved Burger King. My buddies and I would drink Zimas in my basement and then go to Burger King. Zimas? Yeah.

We didn't know what beer was and I started buying beer when I was like 17 because luckily I was losing my hair. So I was buying Zimas without an ID at that age and then I would go to Burger King. That's actually, it seems like one of the few bonuses of early onset male pattern baldness is you look older. Absolutely. Yeah. I walked into a liquor store and bought Zima when I was like 17.

This is in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania? Yes, sir. Wow. I was like 15 years old and my sister went to Assumption College in Worcester. I got an Assumption hoodie and my friends made me put on a Scali cap that Assumption hoodie. I went into this packy and I bought like a couple 30 packs as a 15-year-old boy. Wow.

Wait, you went into a what? What? What? A package store. Packy. Oh, okay. Yeah, all right. I hadn't heard it that term and that is I think a term that is also a slur.

Potentially offensive. Wait, what? Packy? No, no. Yeah. It's a slur. Like a Pakistan, you're saying? Yeah, it's like a, it might be more of a UK thing, but I have heard that as a slur.

That is not what it is. But that is like a shorthand that you're saying. Yes, I get that packy, but I don't believe that the Boston's version of going to the packy is, it's a, it's a, it's a package store. Package store. It's called a package store. It's short for package store. Okay.

That's what it is. Cool, cool. You stupid fucking asshole. We're trying to help you, man. I'm trying to help you. We're saving you. That's, they call them package stores. I believe you.

That's so God damn it. You got to be careful. You're so scared all the time, Wiger. What? You're not scared. You're terrified. Yeah, but more so of ghosts and devils. You, well, we know we got Goulies in our mic cords.

I know. Who knows? The Goulies are around today. I got to, I got to put a, I got to put some cellophane over, or just some plastic over the toilet to keep the Goulies out. Wow. Keep them from climbing out. Yeah.

You know that Goulies, how they get in through the toilet. Yeah. Yeah. No, I'm aware. I understand the Goulies lore. The Goulies never kill anyone. I think so. I think that's their whole, that's like the whole, I mean, they're very much like gremlins.

They're a scarier version of gremlins is the idea of the Goulies. I think it's a gorier, scarier version of gremlins. I think there are some deaths involved. I don't know if I've ever actually seen a Goulies movie. A lot of the times in the Goulies movies, I don't think that the, I don't think that the little Goulies kill people. I got to rewatch. I got to watch the Goulies.

You know what? Maybe, maybe we'll make it a double. Maybe we'll watch all the Goulies. You know, let us know out there how many Goulies deaths there are. Hashtag Goulies body count. All right. Speaking of stuff that ends up in the toilet, Carl's Junior Hardee's. Here we go.

Third pound baby back rib thick burger. Did you guys have this burger? Cause I had it. I did. I got the thick burger style. There's a couple of different options. That's the one I got as well. I did not do this thick burger because I don't love the thick burger.

There's definitely a different sort of patty. It's like more of a meatloafy patty. Yeah. I just went with a single. Right. Now, here's the thing. Here's what I'm going to say. Carl's, I want to turn on Carl's and like, you know, like a lot of the time I'm like,

Carl's, you know, I was very nice to it now. And then like, I feel like I haven't eaten it since we did that episode with Ben Axel right a long time ago. I've definitely got it between now and then, but yeah, maybe, maybe once or something. Here's the deal. I ate that burger and it was fucking good. I couldn't like, I was, I was ready to kind of like, like lay into Carl's a little bit, but they do such a good job with those promo burgers and, and, and I forgot, like I told

you that that the Philly cheesesteak burger at Carl's was like one of my favorites of all time, but I went there and I was ready to turn on it. Couple things though. Right now there's a, there's a campaign with a friend of the podcast. We'll have them on here at some point. Drew Tarver is in there. He's playing Carl's Jr. He's playing Carl's Jr.

And there's another actor playing Carl senior. Those are funny spots. Funny spots. A great guy. And it's a nice break from the past. It's like a totally, it's a different total turn the page on their old ad campaigns. Yeah. And I'm just like, they did one spot where they're actually literally blowing up stuff

from their old campaign. They have like a paper mache, but that they blow up in slow motion. Yeah. Funny. It's, it's, it's a good campaign. They're they've, it feels like they're trying to turn their back on whatever, you know, the Puzder regime regime put like a, whatever they, whatever they did with the Puzder, Reich, the Puzder, Reich, the commercials that they were doing then and, and, and so

Drew was funny. And then the sandwich was, was good. How did you guys feel about it? I thought it was pretty good. I mean, this is a thing I couldn't help, but mentally compare it to my favorite, the Western bacon cheeseburger. Uh-huh. And I think I'd rather get that Western bacon cheeseburger.

For me, the biggest issue was the rib meat. And I'm not sure how you guys experienced, but the rib meat on mine was not particularly good. It felt like this is like the lowest quality thing they can get and call it like a rib. You know, and it was just like a very, felt very processed. And I thought that also the honey barbecue sauce for me was a little on the sweet side. I'd rather have that slightly more tangy barbecue sauce that, that that's their default. The Cattleman's barbecue sauce.

Yeah, but it is, it is very good. I like that honey barbecue sauce personally. Hmm. It was a little sweet for me. But I did like the crispy onion strings. I like that, that crunch that it gave to it. It was a very good burger just for me. I thought the rib meat and the sauce was just like not quite on point.

Now, Nick, I'm going to diverge from you a little bit here because the onion rings were the worst part for me. Oh, wow. I'm not a big fan of onion rings on a burger. I prefer the like animal style, you know, just basically sauteed onions more like rather than the onion rings or almond style as it's called it, you know, in and out burger. So for me, the, the onion rings were kind of the Achilles heel of the burger. I liked it.

I just felt like it was a little bit overloaded with too much stuff. It took me a little while to get into the middle to get to that good saucy bite. You know what I mean? Right. I like the barbecue. Here's what I'm going to say, Chris. I actually did like the, I did like the onion strings and I am impressed with Carl's. They always have like crispy onion, like in the, within the burger, like the, the crispy

onion strings or if you get onion rings in there, they're always, they are crispy. Great crunch to it. They got it. Great crunch. And, and I guess I was calling them onion rings, their onion strings. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

The rings are on the Western bacon. So here's what I thought about this burger. Uh, I agree with you that the rib meat, I was just like, oh, it's kind of dry. Right. Like, like, I like, I like the barbecue sauce, but that was like when I bit into the rib meat, I was like, okay, it's like dry and weird or whatever. What I thought it was missing. I thought it could have used a slice of cheese.

Why not a slice of cheese on there? Yeah. I mean, that was a little bit of a weird decision and you kind of don't realize it until you're eating it. And you sort of like, you're like, oh, that's, that's strange. I would, I expected to get a little bit of Tilla McCheddar or something, you know, been way through this. But yeah, there's no cheese at all.

And it's all disorienting. Also got a guacamole bacon burger just to compare. And I forgot to get cheese on that, which was a big mistake. That's like one of my go-tos, which I love, but you got to remember to ask for the cheese. Yeah. No cheese. I, uh, I like that guacamole bacon burger as well with cheese. And I think they, this, the thing there is like, they have a lot of different versions

of, they're basically like the, they're just their char-boiled burger or their thick burger, but then just with like different toppings. Like it's all fundamentally the same thing. They're just shifting up the toppings. It's kind of like a low rent islands in that sense. Like Island just has a bunch of just like the same, like just different variations on the same set of ingredients. And on that note, I got the Teriyaki burger to pair with this one.

Wow. This one is my mother-in-law's favorite. She loves the Teriyaki burger. Nellie also likes the, the Teriyaki burger from Carl's Jr. It's got a savory sweet Teriyaki sauce, dull pineapple, melting Swiss cheese, red onion tomato and lettuce and mayonnaise. The red onion is the standout of this for me. Like you don't see red onion in a lot of burgers.

It actually works really, really well. Has a nice, nice crunch, a little bit of sweetness to it. And the Teriyaki is one of the lower calorie, right? It's one of the healthier ones. It's one of the lower calorie ones. I mean, none of these are healthy, but it's, yeah, it's one of the lower calorie ones. The pineapple is quite nice. I just think, again, that the Teriyaki sauce for me is a little too sweet on a burger.

And I like Teriyaki sauce, but I just like, I don't know, I feel like that plus ground beef just, it's just such a distraction from, or it's the way, not distraction isn't quite the right word. It just deviates so far from what I expect from a burger that it stops being the kind of thing where it's just like, oh, this is satisfying that burger craving. It's also, this is this one, and speaking of islands, this one is very one to one with an island's burger. They have a Teriyaki burger there, a Hawaiian burger there that I think is just a much better

execution of it. If I was ever craving a burger, I don't know why I'd go to get the Carl's Jr. one. What else did you have, Mitch? So I had criss-cut fries and a Sprite as well, and I did not, I didn't have another burger to pair with it. I just, I've eaten so enough Carl's, and the criss-cut fries were great, and I didn't really drink any of the Sprite. I have a friend who is visiting, Braden, who's from Canada, and she tried the burger, and

a Canadian, she loved it, as a Canadian, she really loved the burger, she said. Do they have Carl's Jr. north of the border? Do they have Carl's Jr. north of the border? Not that they know, yeah. I also want to say that before this meal, before I ate my Carl's Jr. meal, I ate Tamo Shanter, a full, a full meal at Tamo Shanter. And I ate, you know what, it was one of the rare, bad, Lowery's meals. It was like, I got the, you know how they had the bar menu and they had the brisket?

The brisket was like too meaty, maybe it was sitting in like the, the, the juices for too long. Right. It's like very, it just felt like taste a gamey or something, you know, when you get like bad meat. And then I was eating the corn and there was either, you know how corn has hair, like hair at the end of it. It was either a hair from the corn or a human hair.

And I was eating it and I was like, oh, there's a hair in my mouth. I pulled the hair and I was, I was pulling, it was very long and it pulled a piece of corn out of like the back of my throat almost. Oh, fuck. It was attached to a piece of corn. God, that's disgusting. So if you're eating right now, just really let that image sink in. It was fucked up.

It was fucked up. Like, and I love, I, and it's not going to change my opinion of the Lowry's restaurants. I love them. And also, whether it was a piece of corn from a corner, if it was a person's hair, those things happen. You can't help it. Wait a minute. You're someone who docked a fork off of Hillstone because you got a little bit of bone.

That fucked up my tooth. Something that is supposed to be a part of a, of a, of a pulled, wait, what did you have there? A brisket. You had a brisket. No, but what did you have at Hillstone? It was like, oh, it was the, it was the French dip. It was a French dip.

Something that's supposed to be a part of the prime rib meat that is on that. It hurt my fucking tooth. I get that it hurt your tooth, but if you're going to give Lowry's a pass for a long. I gave Hillstone, like, five forks, you dumb asshole. You knocked it down to four forks. You're going to, you're, you were, you were taking and raking over the coals. You were talking about a negative terms, and now you're saying Lowry's, oh, Lowry's is great.

Lowry's is this wonderland. It is blameless, even though I had a fucking hair extending down my esophagus that touched my pyloric sphincter, pulled on some half digested corn in front of an audience or in front of a bunch of disgusted patrons. I was pulling hair out of my mouth like that movie rings. If anyone is familiar with rings, um, Weigur, we haven't reviewed Lowry's restaurants yet. I'm just saying that you sit like, I think you should have some consistency. I didn't give it four and a half forks.

Yeah. I think you had it. You gave it five and then you knocked it down. Maybe you have four and a half. Even so, it's still. I just did that to make you mad. Yeah. You know how to push my buttons.

That's one thing you're very good at. Yeah. And you still remember it. I do. I will fucking suck it back. I'm going to take that to my grave. It'll be my last thoughts. Hopefully fucking soon.

Okay. Well, I agree with you there. Hopefully soon. Yeah. I've said this to Chris before, but if my grave was ready, I'd fucking walk in it right now. Close the fucking. Just gladly walk to the grave. Walk right into the grave and close the fucking coffin shut.

I also got the... Good thing it's not ready. Right. Yeah. If it's ready though, I'll walk in. That's how lazy you are. Someone else has to get your grave ready for you. At which point you'll take the final step.

I also got some jalapeno poppers. I hadn't had them before. Ooh. I've got those too. I'm a big jalapeno poppers fan. You got the same? You also got the jalapeno poppers? What did you think of them poppers?

I'm not a big jalapeno poppers guy. I'm more of a fries guy in general. Right. I thought they were pretty good. They could have had a little more spice for me. They were very mild. You know what it is. Child safe poppers.

I agree with you. They're child safe poppers. It's a great way to put it. And part of the issue is they're not whole jalapenos in there. The ones you get at the jack in the box are a whole jalapeno that's stuffed with cheese and then deep fried so you get a little bit more heat. This is like a diced jalapeno. It's like kind of a popper adjacent concept.

It's like basically like a fried cheese ball with some chopped up jalapenos inside of it. Yeah. When you're doing poppers, what do you expect in there? Do you expect cheddar or do you expect cream cheese? I expect more of a creamy cheese, but I'm neutral as to what it should be as long as it tastes good. Okay. And as long as I get that sensation where I get that little bit of heat from the bite,

but then it cools it down with that little bit of dairy inside of it. Now, do you dip the poppers? I do. I'll usually dip them in a little bit of that house ranch that they got there. Oh, yeah. You know, I missed the ranch. They didn't give you the ranch? No.

They should give that to you automatically. I agree with that. They fucked up. Yeah. So I started dipping in ketchup and that felt like wrong. Yeah, that doesn't work. That doesn't work. That doesn't work.

That's no good, Chris. Come on. I had to dip in something. I'm a big sauce dipper, but I didn't have the ranch there. Yeah. They should include that in your bag. Points off, Nick. Any Bev or Chris, or just bring your own coffee in there?

Yeah. I got the milkshake. Okay. And vanilla milkshake. And I got to say, for me, that was the star of this meal. They did great. It was chunky. It felt like a real ice cream, and I thought it was fantastic.

God, Carl's is good. Yeah, it is good. It is fucking good. You can't deny that it's good and that I enjoy myself when I go there. And I guess maybe why don't we, I guess we should just take it into our final thoughts here. So Chris, you've listed the podcast, you know, all this works, but we'll sort of go around and we'll give our closing argument on this chain and give it a fork rating from one to

five forks. Okay. Well, I love Carl's. I think it's great late night food. This was the first time I really have had it in a long time at a normal dinner time. And it was a little bit not as good as I had remembered eating it from late night. The burgers felt a little bit overloaded. The guacamole bacon burger that I got had like a giant piece of lettuce on it that I

had to kind of crush down, you know, to get to the good stuff. But that said, I still enjoyed it immensely and I will give it four forks. Four forks. Very good. Four forks. Carl's five forks the first time I reviewed it. I think so. Yeah.

Things have changed. We're going to revisit places. Things are going to change a little bit. And Nick, we talked about our revisits. Are the revisits the scores added up? That's the final score. Wait. So wait.

Average. So we add up the two scores and then that average is the final score, right? That means we have to re-listen to our previous episode and see what we gave it. Yeah. Well, whatever. I'm just saying that we can't review. This is the final time we can review Carl's. Oh, we can't return to it.

We're locked in at this point. We're locked in. Chris, you've locked Carl's for us. I'm surprised to hear that because Carl's is the one place it seems like you could revisit since they always have new burgers. We'll do it on a double. We'll try the burger on a double, but it's locked review-wise. Wow.

Okay. Wow. Also, Higer, there is a Wally paw on the mirror behind you. It just freaked me out. I didn't know what that was. What's a Wally paw? A Wally paw. My cat Wally.

Look, you see that? It looks very ghostly. There's a cat print like six feet up the wall on his mirror. I thought a Wally paw was like some Boston like name for a house centipede or something. No. Wally paw. Or what's the racist equivalent you're going to try to fucking say that it is. No, so it's your cat Wally left a little print.

It left a little paw print right there. It freaked me out. I'm sorry. I still can't see it. It's right in front of your face. I think the angle with the light, the way it's shining, I can't see it. You got a great talent for changing the subject on a dime. Chris, sometimes I agree with you with they can go a little overboard on lettuce, but

not as bad as in and out burger. Here we go. The vegetable sandwich. It's not a vegetable sandwich. The in and out burger, they can put too much. I've never had a clean in and out burger. I should do that sometime just like the meat and cheese and sauce or something. Yeah, it's going to be interesting.

I like Carl's a lot. Obviously, I think that they do a great job with their promo burgers. And I thought that this one, even though this one's kind of crazy, I thought it was, I thought it was really good. They're going to bring back that Philly cheesesteak burger. It is great. I want to turn on it a little bit because Puzder is, is bad. And I felt like maybe I'm overrating this place.

And like, I'm not, I'm never like actively trying to eat Carl. You know what I mean? Like, like if it's, if I haven't had dinner, I'm, I'm, I'm only eating Carl's when I am drunk or something. It's not like a place that I'm really going to get when I just haven't need lunch or dinner because it's, it's bad for you and it's heavy. It's over the top. Yeah.

It's over the top. But you can do that turkey teriyaki. It's a little bit better for you. Yeah. It's approved by men's health on the menu for some reason. Oh, hey, how about that? Yeah. Carl's did that for a short period where they were trying to get like some healthy

things going. And they, and they actually, yeah, their turkey burger, their turkey burgers are actually not bad. If you're trying to do some sort of healthy. They're okay. I mean, it's obviously not still great for you. But anyway, Drew Tarver, great guy in this new funny campaign, went and tried to prove a burger.

It was fucking good. I'm like, damn, I don't think I can turn on them that hard. They're, they're, they're good at what they do. But maybe when I first reviewed them, I think I was maybe a little too nice. I think a five fork rating is, is maybe too high. I think that, I think that Carl's is a very solid four fork restaurant. Yeah. I think it's very, very sensible score there, bitch.

Copy it off of me. And you know, I'm even going to say, I think Carl's Jr. has turned a corner a little bit. Carl's Jr. Hardee's has broken with the past, Puzder's out. The sexist ad campaign is out. They've kind of turned the page and they're ushering in a new era, but they're also sort of doing things in a way that's still going to please people who are longtime fans. And I think they've done a good job. They're in that Metallica black album era right now where they've kind of like, okay,

we're still going to do something where everyone who came on and kill them all and master of puppets and ride the lightning and justice for all. All those fans are still going to enjoy what we've got in the black album, but also we can have a little bit of mainstream radio success here. This is the weirdest few, this is the weirdest minute of dough boys ever. Nick, are you trying to prove that you like music now? Because you've been accused of not liking music. I like music.

Okay. I like music. I like Metallica. I like Metallica Hard Rock band Metallica. Look, here's what I'm saying. Here's what I'm saying. They are metal. They play metal, hard rock, metal music.

Metallica had fans that came on back when the lineup was Dave Mustaine on lead guitar and Cliff Burton on bass along with Lars and James Hetfield. Those fans stuck around through the black album era. And then after the black album era is when things went a little bit stray and their fans started to, you know, except for the hardest, the hardcore started to turn a little bit. Is this one whiskey in the jar? Yeah, that's when you started, they started to have stuff like when they started to do the load and the reload stuff.

So I feel like right now Carl's Jr. is in that point where they're still satisfying everyone who goes to Carl's Jr. Hardys for what they've been doing for a long time, but also they're trying to usher in some new fans by saying, we're going to be a little bit more inclusive. We're not being, you know, we're not exclusively marketing to young men. We're going to just try and go on a little bit of a different direction. Hopefully that extends to the way they're treating workers and everything. We'll see. They'll probably need some outside pressure for something like that.

But I enjoy the food. I like eating at Carl's Jr. Hardys. It's good. It's satisfying. It's trashy. I think you guys are spot on and I think the correct ranking for this chain is four forks. Wow. Hand-holding club.

Wow. And let me also say this. We previously, we're in the hand-holding club. Carl's Jr. Hardys is in the golden plate club as it was previously, but it also was in the shit pit. We took it out of the golden plate club because of Puzder, the man. Now that I think Puzder is gone and they're changing things up a little bit, I think it's time to pry them out of the shit pit, hose them off and welcome them back to the golden

plate club. And Puzder gets flushed down into the shit pit. Yeah. Puzder's down there. They're really turning over a new leaf. Much like Metallica, who people tend to hate because they attacked Napster, I just read the other day that there was a Metallica cover band that got all their instruments stolen and the real Metallica stepped up and is going to replace those instruments.

So Metallica has a lot of good will right now and Carl's Jr. has a lot of good will right now. And both of these brands are coming up and people are liking them. They're on fire. Metallica is truly coming up. Give me fuel, give me fire, give me what? I think that what that is. Give me thou which I desire.

Is it thou? That was, again, more late period Metallica, which I'm less familiar with. Just for the record, Metallica's not good. Oh, come on. Come on. It's a great band. It's not. Hey, I got a good band.

Hey, I got a jam out to one. That one's a great song. You know, the early Metallica, I was a teen, actually a preteen, I feel like I liked early Metallica jams. Yeah, there's a lot of, there's a lot of, they got a lot of bangers in there. You know, I know Lars is like kind of an annoying guy. I think he is truly an annoying guy. But I had no issue with his thing against Napster.

Like they were stealing. In hindsight, they were stealing the music. He was on the, he is, he's right. We just weren't prepared for that at the time because people didn't quite have a grasp of how intellectual property laws would work in the internet age. And he, and he was right. I mean, like it's that sort of thing. It's funny.

Like people are like, I mean, like I still use Napster and whatever. You still use Napster? No, no, no. I use Limewire at the time. I guess it lines up with your AOL email account which is selective. I'm saying at the time, I still used Napster when Lars was speaking out about it and Limewire or whatever, but when people were like, he's a fucking, and I feel like the mentality back then was like, these rich assholes, like they can, they can spare enough money.

But you know, we've all worked here in the entertainment industry. You know that it's a, it's a business where you can, you can, you know, you can be working one day and then the next day you're not working at all. And I feel like, I feel like Lars was right, Lars was right. And I feel like people, like he is almost like he's owed an apology. I thought there was like outrage forever. I mean, he is like an obnoxious and when like those documentaries and stuff, I feel like he is kind of an, I think it's kind of a dick.

I think he's kind of a dick in a lot of different ways, but I think that on this particular thing he was, he was right. You know, if you guys agree regarding the Napster controversy, hashtag Lars was right. And if you disagree, hashtag Mitch is wrong. All right. That was Carl senior Hardee's. Can I just say one thing about, I was kind of sad, even though Lars was right, I'm hashtag Lars was right.

I was kind of sad that no one pirated the birthday boys at all. I went to a lot of, I went to a lot of pirated sites hoping that they would post the birthday boys and no one ever did. No one. In fact, yeah, it's the first time ever where the pirated copies of the birthday boys were sent to the birthday boys. So we don't want to, we don't need these. Get this shit off the pirate bay.

Taking up too much, too many gigabytes. All right. It's time for a regular segment. Last meal. Chris Venard Stalen, you've been sentenced to death. Mitch, what did Chris do to deserve this crime, this sentence? Chris, you edit, you slice and you, and you put pictures together. We're now living in a dystopia where it's all practical effects.

It's gone back the other way. Wow. JJ Abrams with his movie force awakens. All practical effects has deemed it irresponsible to put graphics and videos. You're an outlaw like in a, what's, what's the Schwarzenegger movie when there are Mars total recall total recall? You're like in total recall. You're like the, that, that outlaw group, whatever the hell they're called that has

the alien in the chest and you're making graphic videos still, but you get cut by JJ himself and he's sentenced to death. What they're going to do is, so JJ Abrams is like the dictator. He's the dictator in this world and every movie has to be like, has to be as bad as force awakens. This is, and you're directing things that are better, right? So I did just direct a Cheetos web commercial this week. So you know, that's my claim to fame.

All right. Go ahead. He sliced up and made into a film that JJ is going to watch with his friends. Wow. But you get one meal before that happens. So Chris, you know this macabre fate that awaits you. What is the last meal that you were going to put into your body before JJ slices and dices you into a film he is going to watch with his friends?

Oh my God. I'm kind of just shocked from that description. Now, does this have to be a meal from Carl's Jr. or any meal? It's any food is on the table. Any food is on the table. That's the one thing. JJ Abrams is not a good dictator, but he has a little bit of humanity left and he's willing to procure any food stuff for you.

Including togos. Including togos. Man, well, I'm tempted to do like an Osteria mozza or, you know, but you can pick anything from any place. You can pick a pizza from Osteria mozza. You know what I mean? You can end that and then a sub from togos. You can have anything you want.

You're not limited to one place. You're not limited to one place. Man, you guys might think I'm crazy, but right now I'm craving an In-N-Out Burger. Hell yeah. Just a few In-N-Out Burgers, some Double Doubles, Arm and Style. Shout out to my friend Joel Keeler, who's a friend. He's a listener of the podcast. Joel's a man.

Joel. He's talking to me about Arm and Style. So man, right now I'm going to go with In-N-Out Burger. It's crazy. In-N-Out Burger. What's your order at In-N-Out Burger? Tell me everything you would get. Two Double Doubles, Arm and Style, Plus Fries, Vanilla milkshake.

Wow. Wow. That's a lot of calories because you're a distance runner, so you burn a lot of calories. Yeah, occasionally I do some distance running. Yeah, sure. Former swimmer as well. Yep. So anyways, Chris puts in this order.

He eats it up. He gets taken into the editing bay, as J.J. calls it. Which is just a bunch of chopping utensils. Nice. But suddenly. I was trying to describe what's like one of those things, you know what I'm talking about. One of those things where just like the things are chopping up and down, there's like an

episode two basically. Yeah, it's one of those episode two places. Yeah. Where the big cleavers come down. Right. I know what you're talking about. I didn't even think it was weird. I just didn't know the right words to describe it.

But then suddenly out of nowhere, the man who delivered this in and out burger, he just looked like a normal man. He takes off his mask. It's Weigar, Nick Weigar, and he's been helped by Tom Savini and John Carpenter, two practical effects guys that really are good practical effect guys. And he helps Chris, he leads Chris out of there and Chris, you are free to go, but Weigar gets caught and he gets chopped up and made into a film and they watch the film and it's the most boring film ever.

I like the simplicity of this, Chris. I like that you're just getting in and out burgers, getting one place, you're just getting a standard order because I think like it's tempting to overthink it and get too many components and then you've got a sort of a meal that's kind of doesn't have any sort of coherency to it. So I think you made a good call here. Yeah, I was always fascinated by those guys. You see photos of death row inmates last meals and I was always fascinated by the guys that

just get like KFC or something very, very simple and cheap and that's their favorite thing. But I think there is something very satisfying about this, like I know what this is, I know this is going to deliver, it kind of centers me in a way before this fate that awaits me. Nick, are you sad that you were turned into a film? And I would, I think that's like, hey, isn't that true immortality living on in the cinema? It's very similar to a friend of the podcast Drew McQueenie. I think he wrote a Masters of Heart where I think the guy ends up like feeding his guts

into a film projector. I think is how it ends. But yeah, I guess you would live on in a, it would probably be JJ's best work. Me turned into a movie. That's the best thing he's ever done. And Chris, you would swim away to freedom. Oh, cool. It's also a water planet now.

Wait, because of global warming? Because of global warming. Yeah. Or because JJ Abrams just ripped off Kamino from episode two. That that as well. Okay. That was last meal. Just like a restaurant, we buy your feedback.

Let's open up the feedback. Today's email comes to us from Brad Beatson. Brad writes, and I picked this one because they knew it applies to both of you. Did you ever have a garbage plate while you were eating an Ithaca, Mitch? I'm from Rochester, New York, and that's kind of what we're known for. They're disgusting, but absolutely delicious after a long night. Essentially, it's a loaded takeout tray. First layer stuffed half and a half with a max salad and a home fries.

Then on top of that is usually two cheeseburgers or hot dogs, red or white. He wrote out hot dogs. And then most pile on the signature hot sauce or maybe just some ketchup mustard. Chris, you, you're also an Ithaca man. Any experience with that, that garbage plate, which is the thing we've discussed in the podcast. Yeah. Ithaca does not have garbage plates.

I don't know it. I've never had it. I was always a deepy dough guy. Just constant deepy doughs. Wait, what's deepy dough? Those are big calzones that are made with like three sticks of butter or something packed with meat and cheese. That sounds awesome.

Delicious. Yeah. I never got garbage plates. Deepy doughs were great. I actually, my senior year, we had a house, I had a house with five other guys and I had a door that led directly to my room and I'd get delivery right to that door. You tell them to come inside. Instead of sneaking girls into my room, delivery guys would come to my room most weekend nights

and I would eat deepy dough. Deepy dough is great. I loved deepy dough at the time. It's so good. Ithaca had some good spots. Wait, is that the name of a restaurant or is that a typo calzone? Name of the restaurant. It's the name of the restaurant.

That sounds awesome. So why do you have to sneak girls into your room? Anyways, that's besides the point. Well, so the dean doesn't find out. Oh, that's a good point. Wow, that fucking Dean Peggy Williams, who actually did stop partying when we were up. She like, she did suck. Yeah, I have kind of a personal vendetta against Ithaca because they made it a dry campus

and they really clamped down on partying on campus. It was so stupid. In the years, like our freshman year, Chris, I know that you have a similar experience. We went up to this place, there was like circle apartments and I was like my first week at college and there was like a big party up at these circle apartments and I was like, hey, cool. This is kind of fun. Such an awesome party.

Like outdoor kegger as far as the eye could see and I was like, this is going to be great. This is going to be great. That was literally it. They like are like a month later. It was shut down. Wow. The college bought those circle apartments and and and then like I felt like a partying was hard for like the next four years.

Yeah. Then it kind of moved down into town and then they tried to shut that down. Jeff Dutton got arrested at one point. Dutton got arrested. Dutton. Yeah, for stepping on someone's lawn. Dutton in cuffs for stepping on a lawn. Dutton who was on the double is we got a birthday boys week this week.

It's the birthday boys theme going on this week, but he was he was he was arrested for stepping on a lawn. The dorkiest offense and a photo was taken, which one I think was in the yearbook. Pretty cool of him getting arrested. Yes. Wow. I don't know if it was in the yearbook. It's definitely.

And also I'm pretty sure it wasn't cool. I think that's cool. I mean, arrested being arrested for stepping on a lawn and most likely crying on his way to jail. No, so there are no garbage plates, but I had a friend who went to school at RIT. Was it RIT or did he go to you or University of Rochester? Oh, well, either one. He went to school there and and I went and I got a garbage plate up there.

Like I think the main place to get a garbage plate, but I barely remember. I do want to revisit. Hanford is from Rochester. Okay. So next time I'm up there, I'm gonna and I remember I remember it being good. I mean, it's it's a great. It's a great concoction, a great speaking of of drinking or hangover foods. It's a great.

It's it's great for both of those. It's like a very much like a drunk or the day after being drunk food. And I always got garbage plate confused with something you talk about, Mitch, which is a gobbler, which is just like a big, big old pile of Thanksgiving stuff. Gobbler is a gobbler to me. I'll say what a gobbler to me is. Okay. This is this is the same Thanksgiving sandwich, basically, but and they a lot of the times

in Boston, they're called goblers. There was this one place Montclair Deli in Quincy, which was my favorite sandwich shop and shut down very sad. But their gobbler was stuffing turkey, cranberry, mayo all on like a like a bun like a what would it be called like a like a long roll like a brioche, not a brioche. I guess like a long no like a kite like is it a Kaiser but like Kaiser yeah Kaiser role. Thank you. Kaiser role.

And it was it was it was great. It was like my favorite Sam. It was it was like a roast turkey, you know, like Thanksgiving turkey, right? Stuffing warm stuffing. That's important, mayo and cranberry sauce. The first time I had that style of sandwich was at a place and I assumed that that place invented it because I was like, oh, wow, oh, this is cool. I've never seen this before.

This must be unique to this place. I didn't know it was a thing. The idea of having that sort of Thanksgiving sandwich with cranberries or whatever. So good. Such a good sandwich. It's good. If done well. Yes, like all things if done poorly, if a turkey thing is done poorly, it's a little

dry. That's right. This one was never it was always so good. That's I think the key there is the mayo to keep it like moist like you gotta I had mayo is the best people that say they don't like mayo are insane, right? I like I mean the funny thing with mayo is like the people are like, oh, just think of like a spoonful of mayo, which Wagner likes, but but I liked in the pad. I don't not think I do anymore, but then also like that's that's like a gross thing

of like a spoonful of ketchup is great. But like if you add it to a sandwich, it is good. It is good. Yeah. What are you out there? You didn't have a ladle's worth of salsa. No, we use condiments as condiments. Yes, exactly.

Don't you can't put it in terms of just directly consuming it, but I will say on that gobbler or Thanksgiving sandwich or whatever you call it, mayo is a big key, Chris. You're right. That people don't add to it. One, there's two things people do. They put too much of that roast turkey on there and that gets too thick and too dry. And then too, they don't they don't use the mayo. Mayo is huge, huge part of that sandwich.

Mayo is fucking great. I don't get the mayo cynicism. I don't get it. Yeah. It's great. Well, you are mayo come to life. You are mayo. You are mayo, man.

I'm sentient mayo. You're sentient. I wear that proudly. I'm happy to do that. It's funny. It's funny. You don't see mayo on menus that much anymore. It's turned into aioli.

I feel like there's kind of a stigma. It's funny because mayonnaise itself is something that could probably at some point was like had some esteem like, oh, mayonnaise. Oh, it's like this French sauce. And then that became like so mainstream and everyone knows about it. So now like aioli, I have to put a little bit of English on it. Do you remember Undercover Brother? Yeah, I know that.

I've never seen that in my life. A movie that like truly truly I own it. Yeah, it makes me I truly thought it was a very, very funny movie and they like make him eat like a mayo sandwich like to like to prove that he's like come over to like the white people's side and like he has like a I think at one point he has like a secret hot sauce dispenser that shoots onto the mail. It's very funny. Yeah, check it out.

You know what? I wonder how it holds up. I don't know. Maybe not great, but I liked Undercover Brother back when I watched it. I didn't realize that was a stereotype of like white people like mayo. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's something that exists. What are you going to say, Nick?

I'm just going to say like coming out of this podcast, one takeaway for me. I'm going to watch that vice documentary and I'm going to watch Undercover Brother. Hey, not bad. I've never seen it, but it sounds pretty funny. All right. And I trust your taste. If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at dowboyspodcast at gmail.com.

To get the Doughboys double our weekly bonus episodes, subscribe at patreon.com slash Doughboys. Chris also did the cover art for the Doughboys double, which I think is really, really snazzy. Chris Vanards-Dalen, thanks so much for joining us. Thanks for having me, guys. What a treat. It's been a dream. I mean, you guys have built an empire here.

I'm so in awe. A very shitty empire. Chris, it's long overdue. Your brother, we're brothers for life, the birthday boys' brother bond, whether you like it or not. Thanks, dude. Great, funny, great guy. Thank you for doing it.

One of the best. One of the best there is. And also, you guys are the best. God bless you. And also, the great, the Doughboys, come on, the Doughboys cover art. This is Vanards-Dalen. We're talking about it. Every part of it, I love.

I love the little you and me. I love the Doughboys logo. Can I say, I'm remembering now from when we gave notes on this. I don't know if this might make you bad revisiting this, but one of the notes I gave on your initial version, I was like, Hey, this is good. Can we make Mitch a little bigger than me? Yeah. Originally, we're the same size.

Originally. I was like, you fucking loser. I did yell at you. I remember that. Also, it wasn't like I was like, Hey, make me like, like make me the same size as Wyger. Right. And then you were like, he needs to be tubbier than me. I'm an in shape boy.

Here's the thing. I was more about just like, I think the visual in terms of recreating what the two of us look like in a photograph together. I thought it did. And I think it does a very good job of being a cartoon version of that. Yeah. That's where the note came from. I wasn't trying to say anything, I'm not trying to judge you at all.

Fuck you. By the way, a little, if I can bring up one thing about the Spoon Nation shirts and the, I was driving with Tim Kalpakis and Jeff Dutton the other day and they brought up the fact that I hadn't thought of. The Spoon Nation shirt is a little bit like kind of fascist looking. It kind of does have that vibe a little bit. It's almost a little bit alt-right they were saying and I hadn't thought of that. And I wonder if that's a concern for people wearing that.

Well, we can talk about that quickly before we wrap this up. We were basing it, Nick, you wanted to be the light side and you wanted Spoon Nation to be the dark, which I was happy with. Yeah. And so we were basically basing it on like the G.I. Joe. G.I. Joe, Cobra Commander. Cobra Commander. Cobra Kai, Cobra Commander.

Yeah. Autobots Decepticons. Totally. And Cobra Kai from... I thought... I won't... From Crotty Kid. Crotty Kid.

Yeah, sir. Go ahead and wait for a second. I was just going to say I was trying to make it look very kind of cartoonish, like comical and I hope people don't think it looks too... I like the Spoon Nation shirts better but I feel like the, I feel like a lot of people liked the Burger Brigade shirts better. I don't know. What side are you on?

Tweet at us. The good side. Hashtag the good side for Spoon Nation. Or hashtag mail, whatever, mailman, hashtag mailman, mailman. For the Burger Brigade. For the Burger Brigade. Chris, you were a parcel of the Spoon Nation I felt like at one point. I love them both.

I mean, they're both like kind of my children and girls. No, really. I mean, it's like it's like hard to pick a favorite. Of course. They're great logos. Yeah. I thought you did a great job designing those and I'll just say about that, about that point.

I think that that has more to do with like the Cobra Commander etc. was derived from like probably they had some inspiration from actual fascist symbology. They probably were like looking at Mussolini and saying like, okay, we want to use that as inspiration. But that's also for Spoon Nation to be fascist and holding a spoon. That's funny. It is funny. You're right.

I'm with you. I was just wondering if people were concerned about that. It's funny that people interpret your ideas differently than you expect. Chris worked as in a, what was it, a buster design and animator motion graphics. You were an animator motion graphics. You had like the most adult job of any of us and we would like go and visit you. I'd be like, this like sucks. So we'd like you would be like in an office.

You're in an office doing this stuff like like 12 hours a day basically, right? Yeah. So when we were kind of getting birthday boys off the ground, that was my day job. He's been doing this stuff for a long time as professionally. You're great at it. And he's good at it. Thanks, dudes. God bless you.

Do you have anything you want to plug? Nope. Just, I guess, hit me up on Twitter at Chris Van Arts if you want to talk graphic design or something. I don't know. I will talk to you. I can't wait to peep some of these combos that that's going to happen. You got a question on kerning?

Hit up Chris. Oh yeah. That is the space between the letters. There you go. Bethlehem questions. Hit up, Chris. Questions about male pattern baldness in your teens. Hit up, Chris.

Hit up, Chris. Questions about alarm clocks that will shake you out of bed. Hit up, Chris. Questions about distance running on occasion. Hit up, Chris. I think that covers everything about it. It covers everything. That'll do it for this episode of No Boys until next time for the Spoonman, Mike Mitchell,

I'm Nick Weigher. See ya.