Doughboys - D'Angelo with Jon Gabrus and Carl Tart (LIVE)

Episode Date: May 19, 2022

Jon Gabrus (Action Boyz, High and Mighty) and Carl Tart (Grand Crew, The Flagrant Ones) join the 'boys to talk gambling and Mitch's pants before a review of D'Angelo. Plus, a special edition of Snack or Wack. Recorded live at Foxwoods Resort Casino 5/6/22. Sources for this week's intro: https://www.gq.com/story/dangelo-gq-june-2012-interview?currentPage=1&mobify=0 https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/the-hot-button/men-also-dont-like-being-objectified-just-ask-dangelo/article4209849/ https://www.nrn.com/mergers-acquisitions/look-back-yum-brands-us-acquisitions-and-sales-pizza-hut-habit-burger-grill/gallery?slide=3 https://www.nytimes.com/1997/08/14/business/pizza-hut-to-sell-its-d-angelo-s-sandwich-shop-chain.html https://dangelos.com/franchising/our-story/ Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Coming up today, that link that you want to click on is down there in the episode description. Right down there. Check it out. There it is. Move your cursor. Go ahead and click, or if you're on your phone, use your finger and click that link. Click that link in the episode description. In the 1990s, Michael Eugene Archer, under his mononymous stage name, was one of the

biggest stars in R&B. His debut album, Brown Sugar, and his follow-up album, Voodoo, both went platinum, led by his Grammy-winning single, Untitled, Parenthesis, How Does It Feel, and Parenthesis, and his accompanying infamously horny music video. In the 1990s, we're also transformative for a New England sandwich chain that shares a brand name with Archer's stage name. First founded in 1967 in Dedham, Massachusetts. In 1993, the restaurant was acquired by Yum Brand's parent PepsiCo, with plans to add

it as the sandwich branch of its existing KFC Pizza Hut Taco Bell Triforce. By 1997, though, its international ambitions were scuttled, and the sandwichery was sold off to fellow New England stalwart Papagenos. Today, after battling addiction and mental health issues partly caused by his overt sexualization in the aforementioned music video, the R&B star has returned to the music scene, winning two Grammys for his long-awaited 2016 album Black Messiah. And also today, after a seating from a peak of over 200 locations to around 80 across New England, the sub-shop has settled into its niche as a beloved regional fave.

And as the musician asked in his chart-topping hit, How Does It Feel, so too might his name-twin sandwich chain ask, How was your meal? This week on Doughboys, D'Angelo grilled sandwiches. I know this is a New England crowd, a Boston-area crowd, and so you are excited to see him, so let's get him out here. Folks, this week's roast is courtesy of David B. and Chrissy. Let me introduce my co-host, Norman Baste, the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell! What's up, Foxwoods?

Wow. Walked out carrying more D'Angelo. I'm not sure why we need to eat more, but you have it. Sold out, Foxwoods. Don't look behind you. Sold out, Foxwoods. Wow. Incredible.

Yeah, just look directly at the stage. Just look straight ahead. Don't look behind you. Don't turn left or right to see one of the 100 seats my mom bought that are now empty. What's up, Wags? Mitch, very, very excited to review this chain, because this is one you've talked about a lot. I've mentioned it a lot on the podcast.

I do want to talk about one thing real quick, which is that this week's roast was sent in, and I mentioned by David B. and Chrissy, who said they're in the Foxwoods audience. Are you here, David B. and Chrissy? You can probably move up. Yeah, you can probably move up. Celebrating their anniversary. No! Wow.

Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. My college friends walking in late right across the front here. Very cool. Dank, Big Brother, and one of the poofs.

One of the poofs is here. How exciting. The chanting poof. Poof is getting pops. So David and Chrissy, it's not going well, I take it, if you're at Doughboy's live for your anniversary. Yeah, that sucks. Yeah, sorry.

Hopefully, this will rekindle the spark. Yikes, looking out in this audience, luck is not a lady tonight. Luck is a 40-something clinically obese flanneled man tonight. But you look great. Luck be a ladle tonight? Luck be a ladle tonight. It could be something. Luck be a ladle tonight.

There you go. I was not going to sing more, but... That was pretty good. That was a nice little taste. Mitch, we have news to discuss, which is that you blew out the crotch of your pants and I witnessed it. It happened when we walked into D'Angelo's and I looked at the menu board. My crotch blew out.

I did watch you sit down and saw your groin suddenly exposed and you'd be like, oh, fuck. And part of why this was such a crisis, not just that we were in public, by the way, Mitch, see us on the big screen up there. We got a jumbo trot. Oh my God. How exciting, yeah. We're going to need a bigger screen. The boy, man, that's making me conscious of my hairline.

Anyway, so... I look fucking good. Yeah. You look great. You're in Boston for about two weeks. You bought... You brought with you from LA one pair of pants, the pants you were wearing. And I called my mom an emergency and I said, will you go up in my closet and bring another

pair of jeans? Yeah. And then she called back and she says, there's one pair of jeans in your closet, but the crotch is blown out. So Emma bought me a new pair of jeans. That's right. Emma, the best. Emma, the best.

Going above and beyond. Not in her job description. Bought you a new pair of jeans. You could have gone on your own. But yeah, she bought them for you and then she texted everyone. She said, I'll be by to drop off the jeans for you and change your diaper. I didn't think it was cool that Foxwood's put up the over-under on us getting COVID. I thought that was kind of fucked up.

Really? Yeah. I mean, I took the over. Yeah. Yeah. No, we're going to get it for sure. It's one and a half. So the over is both of us getting COVID.

Wow. Wow. It's been an art. It's been a fun trip. What a blast. What a who. What do you think of New England? Connecticut before.

My first time in Connecticut, I spent a little bit of time and yeah, okay, okay, some Connecticut folks. Yeah. Here's that. Here's the main, my main takeaway is that the winding mountain roads, the country roads, the rural highways, they make me very motion sick. So that's the main thing. I just feel very dizzy and disoriented until I can find my footing again.

Yeah. Yeah. You were complaining about that when I was driving. Yeah. I got a lot of family and friends here. Everybody's here. That's what I'm saying. Who here doesn't know Mitch personally?

All right. Okay. A smaller group. My college buddies, all the Quincy guys, my godparents, my goddaughter. She saw the Oscar Meyer Mobile on the way to Connecticut. She saw the Oscar Meyer Wiener Mobile. And something else was seen by one of your relatives, Mitch. Oh, yes.

My god sister, Sarah, saw two seagulls fucking outside her hotel window and she sent me the video of it. Yeah. And let me tell you, the show is upstairs. It's very funny. Honestly, we should all go up and watch. It's very good. They're still going at it.

They're going. They went out a long time. These are like Tantric seagulls. Al said, Sarah's fiance was knocking on the window and he said that the birds will look at him and still went on with it. So I think they're maybe into it. Yeah. They want him to watch.

He's hopefully watching the Bruins game. Boo. The hell? Oh, my God. Rangers fans. Wow. Well, this is OK. This is what I've heard about Connecticut is there's a divide between the New England

sports teams and the New York sports teams because of its proximity to both regions. Yeah. There's some Yankees fans. There's some some some Bo socks fans. Yeah. Yeah. We shouldn't have brought it up apparently. No, people are mad.

No one's happy. Yeah. Do you think when Elvis sang a little less conversation, he was talking about the Doughboys podcast. I think we have plenty of conversation. No, no, we should have less of it. Oh, yes. But doesn't he like a little less conversation, a little more action and please like he wants

to like so he wants the Doughboys to stop talking and fuck already. He would be he would be looking out that window watching the seagulls for sure. Thank you. Wags, you know, this mic isn't too comfy. So I brought something along, which is unfurling a D'Angelo's package and inside he has placed the microphone inside of the D'Angelo's role and is using it as a koozie. Emma warned me that this would fuck up sound. Would you like a half?

Yeah. Why not? There you go. Thanks buddy. Of course. I got breadcrumbs all over me. Truly straight onto your crotch. Yeah.

Bird's land starts sucking me off. Jesus, my family is here for God's sakes. Why do we do this? This podcast? Yeah. Great question. Ask us six years ago, Mitch, part of the reason we do do this podcast is because we have our running bits, our recurring gags, our japes, if you will.

And you have one of them, which is that. I know. How do you know? There we go. Dispunation. This is more comfortable to hold the microphone with the bread, I will say. It is more comfortable. It's a lot more comfortable.

It really is more comfortable. I was a joke, but it is comfortable. No, yeah. Wags, Emma, hit them with a drop. Why don't you? The wager. Take a break. Nothing happens.

Nick goes to bed by about 9 p.m. He puts on his sunglasses and to sleep. Nick goes. I was some nambular. I couldn't sleep in the Air BnB. I was awake for like 36 hours straight, and yeah, I could barely walk. That's partly why I wear the sunglasses, which was mentioned earlier. Yeah, let's live.

Let's live. Wager. Of it all. Meet me at Foxwood School. Wow. Always uncomfortable playing those live. Hey, Mitch, Irma, and if you can read Wally, wow, what? He thinks only one of your cats can read.

I've only made two drops in my life. The first one was played at the only live show he attended, Pizzeria Regina episode. There's a Pizzeria Regina in the casino. That's right. There's one here. But you said it's not a real one, according to you. I mean, it's not going to be as good as the North End one. What it qualifies is if you're like, I had Pizzeria Regina, I had it at Regina Pizzeria

is the signage. Oh yeah, it doesn't count. Who cares? Why do they say it backwards? I don't know. I don't know. It crumbs everywhere. Fucking mess.

The second one is this one, and I hope you'll play it at Foxwood's because it will be the second live show that I attend, or hopefully is currently the second live show that I am currently attending. As you read this, we'll find out right now. Also, my niece Charlotte drew the attached picture of you and Nick. I think it captures Nick's DVSI pretty well. Thanks and much love to you all. Wow.

Brian Cotton. Is Brian Cotton here? Hi, Brian. Wow. Happy anniversary. I wonder you and your mom celebrate your anniversary. Oh, Jesus. It was my mom's birthday last week.

Wow. Happy birthday, Mrs. Mitchell. She's here. Happy belated. And happy Mother's Day, Ma. Happy early Mother's Day. Hope you like COVID. All right.

We should get funnier people out on stage. Yeah. I'm very, very thrilled to have these guests. You guys are in for a treat. First up, for the podcast, High and Mighty in Action Boys, the upcoming show, 101 Places to Party Before You Die, which is coming to true TV this summer. John Gabriel. What a greeting.

Two kisses on each of our cheeks. Wow. I will say this, and it's true. You smell like moonshine. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They say, moonshine before beer, you're in the clear.

I was just trying to impress Carl backstage. He's like, yo, I got this moonshine for us. I was like, yeah, I love this shit. I just drank it. I was like, my heart is on fire. Rocky Four is going to train to my fucking heart right now. Speaking of which, from Grand Crew on NBC and the podcast, The Flagrant Ones and XOXO Gossip Cleans, please welcome Carl Tartt.

Yeah, the boys round here, drinking that ice cold beer, talking about girls, talking about trucks, running in red dirt, rolls out kicking up dust. The boys round here, sitting up. We're just going to stop down real quick while they build a new table for us to sit at. We should all sit on the table. We're all just touching it. We fly. We all fly together.

It's true. Some poor woman had to sit in between me and Carl on the flight out here. She didn't come until we were almost ready. I was like, no jinx, no jinx. Don't say nothing. We was knocking on the chairs if it was wood, hoping that she wouldn't show up. She was like, this is me. I was like, hey, you're funeral.

But don't worry, by the end, I look over and Carl has got her watching Grand Crew on her screen. I see her clap when he comes up. Is it cool if I put my vape in the D'Angelo's room? Yes, it is. I'm keto, so. Enough of these breadcrumbs. You're God's sister, a word I heard for the first time this weekend.

Anymore, breadcrumbs, she's going to be filming another fucking bird porn over here. It's very funny. I'll show you the video after. See, I like to go straight to only birds, eliminate the middleman, and give the money right to the performers. Oh my God, President Lincoln. President Lincoln blows his own brains out at our show. This sucks.

John Wilkes Booth runs in. Back to auditioning. We're very thrilled to have you guys for a number of reasons, but one of them is that I know you are both sandwich enthusiasts, and we're talking about a fabled sandwich chain here in New England. What do you each like in a sandwich? Great question. Whatever Jersey Mike's is doing with these sandwiches, I like it.

I'm a Jersey Mike's guy. I don't know if y'all heard the recent episode. I am a Southerner myself, but I do appreciate the Yankee sandwich, the Jersey Mike's. What's the difference between the Yankee sandwich and a Southerner sandwich? Our sandwich is a full of red clay. It's got that Mississippi Delta mud on it. You guys eat mayo up here, down in the south, we're smearing brown butter on all our sandwiches. Child.

Easy now. That was a Southern impression. It's not like the lady from Poltergeist. Ladies and gentlemen, this house is clear. I got to send her up to my fucking hotel room bathroom. Get the ghosts out of there, Jesus Christ. Oh, sorry. I forgot to do something.

What happened? The drop? No, no, I played the drop. Oh, okay. Bummer. Sorry that he played it, guys. I got something fun to do here. Okay.

Oh, man. This is going to be, if anytime it's just some fun to do, it's a lot of work for everyone else. Yes. But he seems to enjoy it, so God knows what this is. So why, as you asked me before the trip, you said, can you get some money out of the Doughboys account so we can like use it for tips and stuff, right? Yes.

You remember this? I got some, but I also got a little bit more money out. Okay. I got $500 out. Wow. And I found out that Emma has never gambled before. And so I got a $500 chip right here, $500, and Emma's going to go gamble for the first time.

Wow. Emma's coming on stage accepting the chip. The audience is going to tell her she should put it on black or red, and this is her bonus for coming here. So her bonus is either zero or $1,000. The only money I've ever made on this show. So what is it? Black or red, everybody?

Black. Come on. That just sounded like screaming. Here's what we got to do by applause. All right. So first up, make some noise for red. Now, make some noise if you think she should choose black. That's right.

It was like black is the consensus. All right. She's going out. Wesley Snipe said, I don't pay my taxes. Hey, just be careful, Emma. I hear once you bet on black, you never go back. Okay. Now, he's starting off quick today.

And who's in for green? We've been warming up for eight hours to hang out. That's the problem. Can't you put, can't you place it on green? You could put zero, double, zero, double, zero. Very well. Yeah. That's a long shot.

I mean, if she hit that, she'd win $33,000. Holy shit. I could be lying. He's lying. But it's not true. It's a lot. The odds are 1 to 33. It's like 8,500, I think she would win if, oh.

Doing the quick math. Not that I'm a gambling addict with my legs shaking. I think it's 8,500. I think it's 17 to 1 on the fucking 8. Oh my gosh. Emma forgot the dough boys, the grow pro. She's supposed to wear around her head. So we can see.

Someone is filming her. So we will see her lose the $500. Okay. Oh, is she going to bed it right now? Yeah. She's going to bed it right now. This is your money at work, folks. Thanks to 20 of you for financing this.

It's definitely, yeah. What she should do is come back and say, I lost, but just pocket the $500. Of course. And everyone will be like, we're sorry. Here's more chips. If she does that, I will respect her even more. Yeah.

I think this is a, this is a great bit, Mitch. Also, it probably would have worked with a $20 chip, but. $500. It's 500. We're going to do in the math. Uh, Gabriel, what do you like in a sandwich? Uh, a severe lack of tomatoes. No tomatoes.

Boo tomatoes. I'm a big sandwich head and since moving to the West Coast, I miss my, my easy access to sub and hero bread. There's like 0.1 places that have semolina bread in Los Angeles. It's killing me. Even like Italian delis are like, we put it on wraps. And you're like, what? Uh, but don't do that.

LA is not that vegan-ish. It's not vegan. It's the fact that they have sourdough they got back at, but they don't have the semolina stuff. God, the godmother at Bay cities has it. All about the bread has something adjacent. Carrera cafe actually uses semolina. You can find it, but in, in the tri-state area where I'm from,

you can get a dea, you can get three decent sandwiches in every town. Yeah. Like on long, on Long Island, every town has five CVSs, five Italian ice places, five delis, five gas stations, five Duncan's, and they're all owned by one dude. Well, uh, this week we're talking about D'Angelo. D'Angelo is singular, Mitch. People say D'Angelo's, but it is D'Angelo on the, you know,

their corporate language. Yes, yes. Go buy the book. It's good. Uh, language is beautiful. We call it dingledangles. We can call it dingledangles. That's fun.

My mom calls it dingledangles. You know, big D's and I had no other. That's when the lady in the jewelry store called it today. What's that? I was at the, I was, I went to the jewelry store. You went to the jewelry store today? Wow. They said backstage, watch how I work this into the conversation.

What did you get? Oh, nothing. Don't announce in front, you get your chain run. She might be here. Is the lady from the jewelry store here? You lying bitch. Said she was coming to the show. She just comes back from the bathroom.

What happened? Uh, nothing. She was, she was real nice. She called it dingledangles. Yeah. Dingledangles. It's got a few names. It's great.

I like it. You can say D'Angelo's though. I think a lot of people call it D'Angelo. One of the things you can do in the, in the Northeastern United States is add an S to almost anything. That's true. You want to get a cup? You want to get pizzas?

Pastas? Pizza, soda. I do the thing today. Pizza. My mom says pizza. Shout out Joanne who's here as well. Wow. Happy Mother's Day, Joanne.

Happy Early Mother's Day. You know, I performed in New York City for 10 years. She can make it to the casino shows for some reason. Oh, Foxwoods. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I think I have comps there.

What? So I hear people at the tables are getting comp free tickets to this show and they're just sliding it back. I just go out to my room and jump out the window. Go see the dough boys. People are like, what? So the, so the, the chain we're talking about D'Angelo was purchased by, I mentioned this in my intro.

Purchased by PepsiCo. They were the young brands and their plans was Mitch to make it into about Rushmore of Chains, KFC, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell and then D'Angelo would be the sandwich branch and they didn't do that. But I was trying to find more context on this. So I binged young brands D'Angelo and you know what came up? Our pizza hut two episode with, with Jen D'Angelo dough boys has folded it on itself. I'm trying to do research for the podcast and I'm discovering our own podcast.

Wow. So I listened to the episode. Yeah. Listen to the episode. No real info on Angelo. That's a true honor to be pulled up when you're searching D'Angelo. I think that's, that's an honor for us. Oh yeah.

Anyway, better than searching Mike Mitchell and auto completing to feet. So it's owned by Papa Geno's or Papa Geno's and, and, and D'Angelo share a parent company apparently. And so the, the, the two of them are one. I mean, is that part of how you think of D'Angelo here? No, not at all. It's not. Okay.

No, I don't think, I don't think of them together though. I think that, that merger happened at some point. I think of it as a, the place I went as a boy. Sure. After a football practice, double sessions, I'd go to D'Angelo's and managed to gain more weight in a day of double sessions. Double sessions. Two a day.

Two a day. Two a day. Two a days if you actually played and aren't trying to get stolen high school football Valor. I'm here for my double session coach. Back to back rehearsals. I'm on it. I booked the role of left guard.

You said your name on the list. Yes. Starting defense, place at the table. Latimer from the program. I'd just like to quote the program for everybody. We eat Thanksgiving at my God parents house. We're here and the Thanksgiving game I got in for the last plays and they're like, you're coming up and we watched it on the TV, the replay.

And then they, we saw me get pushed back like 30 yards in front of my whole family. I though my dad always worked weekends and he can never come to a football game. I feel like I'm in therapy and he came to one and I got a pulling guard cleaned my clock when I was at the end and the coach yells, it's called the weight room game. And I was like, the one game my dad is at. I'm getting called out by name for getting pancake. How do we all have an embarrassing story about this? I, we're playing at receipt of high school.

Nobody knows what that is. We are playing at receipt of high school. I, my mom brings a new guy. She's dating and when you are raised by a single mom, you won't every dude she brings in to be afraid of you. Like now beat your ass. If you do anything crazy to my mom or like, and he's the nicest guy, like a five foot six doctor.

And so he's nice to, and she brings him to the game and the same thing happens. I'm, I'm edge rushing and a guard just fucking knocks me out. You get excited. You're like, oh, this motherfucker's mine. I just knew after the, after the game, he was like, man, man, I'm taking your mom out tonight. We ain't coming home. He leaves a, he leaves a CTE pamphlet out for you.

You're going, Hey, have you ever heard of UCB? You're going to need it. Cause that shit out there was comedy. Oh, you haven't heard of UCB? Oh, no one has. It's gone already. Close forever. It's a huge part of your life and it didn't really push you along.

Oh, this shouldn't be in the pod. I had a clarinet solo and orchestra once. That sounds right. And I was, I like lost time. Like I was like, I was like a measure off of when we were supposed to come in and so I was behind. And then so like I fucked up my solo. Yeah.

With the orchestra. Do you have to take a lap when that happens? Well, I like, I certainly had a little bit of shit. Like the flute section was kind of like, like, you know, tittering while I was after my fuck up, but then I had to perform it again for my grandparents in our living room when I got home to show them I could do it right. Like my parents made me do it. Your parents made you do it, right?

Yeah. How did they find out? My dad did the same thing. He put it on full set of pads and lit me up in the backyard in front of my entire family. My memory is I told them that I was like, first off, it was obviously wrong. Like you can tell when someone's like out of time in a, you know, in a composition, but also like, I think part of it was like, I told my parents this. And then they were like, well, you should do it again for grandma and grandpa.

And then I did. Yeah. It was, which was extra degrading. And you have to go home and do this show for grandma and grandpa again, right? But you do it where you play all the parts. Yeah. I play everyone. I do it in front of their graves.

How do you do me, Nick? Yeah. How do you do me? I do my voice for everyone. No, I want it all thin. Yeah, Nick. Do me, Nick. Wow.

She's back. Emma's back. I lost it. Yeah. Emma lost. She lost. Honestly. Thanks guys.

As, as a true gambling degenerate, what just happened to you is the best possible thing that could have happened. Yeah, yeah. No, seriously, if you would have hit, you would have said, oh, gambling is awesome. You win all the time. Right. And then you would have lost way more than $1,000 over the course of your life. What was it?

It was red? It was red 16. Yeah. Damn. Shame on you. Yeah, it wasn't you. I'm going to call Wesley Snipes up and say, you're wrong. But you're right about not paying taxes, brother.

Enjoy. Bye, Emma. Bye, Emma. Sorry, you don't get a bonus. $500. Yeah, baby. Can't say I'm not fun. So I think your financial business partner could potentially say that's not fun, but

he's not going in front of Emma. I'm actually not giving her that money too. Mitch makes Emma do everything. By his pants? By his pants. Yes. Before we stopped at the jewelry store today. Did you pick up any ice?

We stopped at the Levi store to get Mitch a pair of pants. He gave us the wrong size. I was like, well, I won't say the waist size. I was like, beep, and buy 32. No, you said 30. You said buy 30. I was like, Mitch. And each, all of us who are like six, two, six, three, we're like, we all wear a 32.

Me, Carl, and Weigar, and Emma. Emma wears a 30 length. Yeah. And we all wear 32. Mitch is taller than all of us. He's getting fucking clam diggers on. He's doing Huck Finn cosplay. It's still nothing to say.

I want a pair of capris. We need to pick up pants for Mitch. Can you take down those decorative pants that are up as like a tarp kind of thing? Yeah, the stuff you have blocking the sun for every, all the employees. You know, Mitch, you're about to take a little trip abroad. You're going to Costa Rica. That's right. Why?

So I'm going to Costa Rica with the family. It's going to be a lot of fun. Going to maybe see a monkey. Oh, that's fun. Going to maybe see a bird. Just that. Just a one monkey, one bird. That's it.

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Get Mitchell out of there. He's going to get himself killed. I heard that in the game lined up and I was like, oh, shit. Coach Glennon yelled that at me. Wow. Anyways, I went out to have a great career. Let's talk about some Sammy's wigs. That's right.

Well, so we went to a D'Angelo together, saw a few, a few listeners there, some fun interactions. You know the show, Emmy Blotnick, who birthed Oonga Pachka, which I'll say on the podcast, told me to get the seafood salad, which was her dad's favorite. I talked to a few people who said like, this is like a place they'd go to. Like you were saying, Mitch's kids, like they'd go with like a mom or a dad or both of them. And this was a little treat spot. They don't seem to have the seafood salad anymore, but what they do have is the lobster roll slash lobster sandwich. And so we got two of them.

We got one of each and we shared. Uh, and, uh, Gabriel's just, excuse me. I don't know. That's that was picked up by the mic, but Gabriel's just belched extremely, extremely loud right on my damn neck. It tasted like corn mash. This was seven subs today. We ate a lot of subs. This was an expensive sandwich, but I will say that I feel like we got our money's worth because to me, this was

better than it had any business being. I was shocked by how good of a lobster this was. I'm saying this is a lifelong SoCal surfer dude. Like I don't, you know, like I've had some seafood, but lobster is not as much of a thing, you know, outside. It's more of a thing in New England. And lobster is not something you associate with chain restaurants, with exception, of course, red lobster. But I don't think people are going there going treat myself to a pound and a quarter lobster. Right.

You're like hammering biscuits and then throwing them up at home. Yes. Not big in New England. Red Blosser is not that big in New England. No, it's not. That's because nobody is fucking good. Beyonce told us. Beyonce said, he fuck me good.

I take his ass to a red lobster. Step your fuck game up, fellas. You take that back, Carl. Step your fuck game up. Do you think Jay's easy? You're too busy thinking about Tom Brady. You're not thinking about fucking. Jayburst was going to wear a David Tyree jersey tonight.

No, tomorrow night. I'm going to come out with a helmet stuck, football stuck to my forehead. I'd be like, don't have any night shades or else you're going to lose. He's a good guy. He's a great guy. Anyone who goes to the Bucks at 46 is a good guy. What did you guys think of that? I'm not impressed.

Oh, just wait till the actual show. What did you guys think of that lobster roll? Speaking of which, speaking of the actual show. Here's what I thought about the lobster roll. Yes. Shall I go first? Yeah, please. Please.

Very big, chunky pieces of lobster. 100%. Celery was not overpowering in the salad. The mayo of it was good. The seasoning was good. That's very important. Get that seasoning right. I don't know what they're using out here, but it was good.

And not too much mayo. I'm a mayo guy. I'm a mayo king. Me too. Yeah, even though you would later, spoiler alert, get the Thanksgiving sandwich, sans mayo. Hold on. Hold on.

We going to get there, John Gabers. Oh, sorry. Did I ruin your bit where you get to how you didn't order mayo? Let's get out of here, folks. Oh boy. Let's get out of here. Everybody stay alive. Back to the jewelry store.

That's a jewelry store. We all need a new chain now. Because we've been humiliated. No. The proportion of mayo was good on this sandwich. The seasoning was good. It was juicy. It wasn't like too cold.

Right. I know when you order, so people do hot lobster roll and cold lobster roll. When you do a cold lobster roll, I don't want it too damn cold. I got cavities. It's not like an ice pop. No, I know what you're saying, though. It could be too cold sometimes. Fresh out the fridge.

You got to figure that out. You want it to be refreshing almost. You kind of want warm bread, cold lobster, right? Thank you so much. That's what this gave me. Yeah. Good temperature in the lobster. I agree.

I actually preferred the hot dog roll to the sub roll. Although I like their bread. I just thought it worked better with this particular sandwich. You like the hot dog roll more. Yeah. They give you a nice hot hot dog roll. They put it on the flat top grill. How did you say hot correct the first time and then say hot dog?

He's putting this shit on. Hot hot dog. I knew he was putting this shit on. Hot hot dog, please. One hot hot dog. Yeah. Sir, are you having a stroke? I'm happy I'm here because I'm going to bring the mic out to the audience and test everybody

and see how they say it. Because ever since I've known you the past 10 years, I've been like, why he said like that? Yeah. Even you said Papa Geno's and I know he says like, Papa Geno's or whatever. I don't. It doesn't just fall out of my mouth like that. Papa Geno's.

Papa Geno's. P-U-B-B-A. I'm home from work. P-U-B-B-A. Oh, P-U-B-B-A-R. Aye, puppy. Jesus. I'm a master of character work.

I dug the lobster roll. I had the lobster sub because I'm a, I had not seen that before at a place and it was fucking rad. The lobster meat really surprised me. Yes. It truly did. But that's like the power of New England is that you're like, oh yeah, this shithole has fucking insane lobster. Hold on a second. It's beautiful.

It's beautiful? Yeah. Angelo is beautiful? You know what? Yeah, it was. Okay. No one's on your side here. It was, I know you'll change soon.

It's like 80 square feet and it's like, it's mostly a parking lot. I'm not saying it's like, I'm not saying it's like, don't eat there. The food's fucking great, but it's arguably a fucking parking lot kiosk. I thought you were insulting New England for a moment, but yes, it is kind of like a parking lot kiosk. You'll know when that happens. There was a D'Angelo outside North Quincy High School. I know I've brought that up a lot already. There we go.

Finally got the reaction you were hoping for. I'm not just looking for cheers, even though I did like that. North Quincy High School. So a lot of, it's going to work. So a lot of the times it would be an after school spot. You go and grab something at D'Angelo. Get that classic, you know, in between lunch and dinner, full meal. A large stick of cheese.

I mean, I know as a kid, I'd be like, well, before football practice, I should have four slices of pizza. It was Wendy's for us. I spent like $7 at Wendy's. And in 2007, $7 at Wendy's got you a long way. Oh, he really did. Yes. We had McDonald's and D'Angelo's were kind of the two ones that were nearby by North. If you want to hear the most Italian sentence ever, when I was trying not to eat unhealthy senior year of high school,

I would have two grandma slices before. I was like, hey, no cheese. Okay, just sauce and bread. That'll get me through practice. Because our fullback, the Vecchios, his dad owned super pizza. So you get the football team got discounts. Oh man, I'm 40. I'm talking a lot.

High school football a lot. Yeah. Weird. And I gave away a lot of my possessions recently. The slow decay of time is crushing. Bigger pop than North Quincy High School is the idea that we're all going to die whether we want to or not. It's true.

Conveyor belt. I'll see you all in hell, no boys, fans. That guy's wearing your fucking waistband. That guy's wearing an overcoat and an action boy's shirt. And I'm terrified. This is a profile situation. Someone get Dylan Klebold Jr. out of here. As soon as they asked me to come to Boston, I said, I'm prepared for this.

I told you, it's going to be fine. Everything's fine. Everything's fine. Mitch, did you like that lobster roll? Hold on a second. Just give me a minute. The guy scared me. That's fine.

Nick is trying to get the show back on course because this guy sent Nick a text and said, I will detonate a bomb if you do not get the show back on track. Will you be my Eric Harris? And Nick said yes. Dylan Klebold had a son. I thought the same thing when you were thinking that. But you were a joke. They did.

I read a whole book on Columbine. Eric Harris, this is why the story has been misreported because it was always like, oh, these two kids were bullied and this was their revenge. That was the initial media reaction. They were actually the victims in this story. No, no, not true. Well, yeah, that's how a lot of the media was framed. Yeah.

But it's not true. Eric Harris was an absolute psychopath. He was dating an adult woman. He was like having sex in high school. Nothing says I'm cool. Did you have, oh, this is a great topic. In high school, there would be these people where you'd be like, yo, he's 16. But he's fucking a 40 year old.

That's the coolest thing in the world. Right, right. And then you get to be older and you're like, was that was actually really fucked up. Yeah. I was like, I thought it was this. We were like dapping this dude up every day. And now in hindsight, I was like, bro, I think you got sexually assaulted. Yeah.

My friend's friend was when she, when we were 15, she was dating a 22 year old guy and we'd like go hang out at his apartment and be like, this guy's cool. Let the kids hang out, you know. Jesus. Don't have any teachers that was messing with kids in the school. I didn't run into that at Long Beach Poly, but I'm sure it's. Despite everyone there being sort of open minded about sex, being polyamorous and all that. No, that was anything with anyone here?

Yeah, that was big in my high school. Really? Yeah, yeah. My mom worked at my high school and there was. Say no more. That sucks. Mitch, please come to the principal's office. It's lunchtime.

I made too many jokes and I know she's here now. She's here. I know it shows my mom. I'm fucking spiraling. You're going to meet her after this. You're going to fucking talk to her. I don't have to talk to anyone. Jesus.

My mom would never come to this casino. They stop serving alcohol at 1am. Your mom knows like a poker house. A juke joint. Wise, I liked that lobster sandwich. Yes. It was good. I actually liked the lobster sandwich maybe more.

Look, the bread at the Angelo is something else. Great bread. Yeah. Let's talk about what was that? The bread is like truly solid. Absolutely. It's a reason to go here and which isn't true for a lot of sandwich places, a lot of chain sandwich places.

Let's talk about some of the other sandwiches. I'll just run through a few of these. Thanksgiving toasted, a number nine, which we got with chickens so I could have some. And then, Gabriel, you got a steak number nine as a pocket. Yeah, I was recommended by my friend Jared Freed. He said, you got to get a number. Boo.

Yeah, he does suck. Number nine in a pocket. And I didn't even know anything about this. This place before it, I was like, if I walk in here and order a number nine in a pocket and they like break a bottle over my head or something. Also an Italian toasted and a cheeseburger sub. What were the, what were the hits and misses here for

you guys? What was the number nine? That was what the ladies were talking about in the jewelry store today. Is she here yet, jewelry store lady? Are you here? Scream out for me. Is this some sort of date or what's going on?

I kept being like, man, you know, I can get you free to you don't perform in here tonight. This is me. You see, Fox was his tart was tonight. She's like busy helping two people and you're just sorry. Excuse me. I'm a body jewelry.

Just come to the show. No, no, I'm kidding. What was the number nine? The number nine, the steak, peppers, onions and mushrooms and American cheese. We got it with chicken. We got it because wise you're not eating red meat. Yeah.

We got one with chicken and the Gabriel Scott one with steak as a pocket as I mentioned. Yeah. We talked about what we ordered now. Yeah. Let's just, let's just go through these roster sandwiches before we get into it. So he's got it.

Like his iPad is full of them. This is all. Yeah. It's all Columbine's Wikipedia. The, the, so it was a planned bombing. That was the thing. That was the thing that was not reported. It was a failed bombing and their plan B was the shooting.

And so they had, they like had all these. I was joking. Don't give Columbine facts at the live show. It's going to become a segment with a fucking song eventually. If you know the whereabouts of. I got the Thanksgiving sandwich. Yes. Very good sandwich.

A gobbler as we call it in these parts, the Thanksgiving sandwich. Is that a, is that a staple? A gobbler? Yeah. Gobbler sandwich is big up in the, in New England and the Northeast for sure. Well, let me tell you about it. I, I did consider myself a mayo king.

Any other sandwich that I eat that ain't peanut butter and jelly, I'll put mayo on. Here's why this sandwich had cranberry sauce on it. I do not believe that cranberry sauce or any type of jelly or jam or some type of preserved fruit deserves to be mixed with mayonnaise. Interesting. It's just not, I don't believe, I don't believe that.

You, I'm not joking. You're so fucking charming. You just sold me. I literally am watching you and I'm like, I'm never putting mayo on my sandwich again. And I'm a fucking mayo. I'll dip that shit in mayo. I love you, but opposite.

I'm fucking livid right now. I'm sorry. I'm sorry to have made you mad. But I truly, when it comes to certain sweet and sauce type things, I don't believe that mayo should be included in anything gelified. See, I don't, I like the cranberry sauce and mayo getting mixed together.

No, no, no, no, no. Yeah. I didn't even want to try it. Like a burger or an egg sandwich when the mayo and ketchup get mixed together. Mayo and ketchup is different. Ketchup may be a fruit, but it is a savory fruit. Ketchup may be a fruit.

Thank you, Dr. Tart. Dr. Tarty, take off your masks. Take off your mask. Take off your mask. Eat servings of ketchup a day and you'll be fine. Tomatoes may be a fruit is what I was trying to say. Yeah. Tomatoes may be a fruit, but I just, when I saw that they had

mayo on this sandwich, I said everything else about this sandwich was great. The dippage of the gravy. I'm excited for that. The brand. The stuffing. The turkey. It's hot.

And then I was like, okay, here's what I'm, here's how I'm going to freak this shit. Extra cranberry sauce. I won't need mayo because the shit will be juicy. With cran, jellified cranberry sauce. The woman working the counter said, enjoy freaking your shit. And she put down the cranberry.

She knew what I was about to do. I didn't even say it in the store. I said, hello miss. May I please have a gobbler? Please a gobbler. And she said, enjoy freaking your shit, homeboy. She knew what I was about to get into. She knew what their fuck was about.

You invited her to the show as well. I did. Are you here from the Angelo's miss? I told you, oh, there she is. I heard a woo. Thank you for coming. Now, I think that they were maybe expecting us. I feel like the,

You think so? I think that, I think a tip was in. They were all doing push-ups before we came in. We had Amber, Melinda, Joe, and Jerry. Great staff. Great staff. Great staff. I've loved, I love walking in with all, like all five of us

because we're like, yeah, okay, we're going to get some food and they're like, oh shit, five people. That's going to be at least around five sandwiches. And we're like, we'll have this, this, this, this, this. They got like four people coming out of the back, like we'll be right back with the rest of your stuff. And they're looking at us. They're literally like coming over to the table going,

you want me to get rid of this? You guys are done eating, right? Please, please say you're done eating. We'll just get rid of it. And we're like, no, we're still picking. And he's like, okay, okay. It's like opening the fucking door on an vampire. We're all like, ah, no, no, no, no.

I haven't, I haven't licked mayo off my fingers yet. Sorry. Don't be sorry. You're right. They were, they were, they were, they were, they were ready to take the sandwiches away from us. For a place with no table service. They were very, they were very much doting on us.

Yeah. I was like, are y'all about to close? What the fuck is going on? Why do y'all keep coming over here? Get away from us. We're celebrities. Exclusively at fast food restaurants. Are we considered celebrities?

You took a call right when the sandwiches came. Business baby deals. Tis Friday. It's a weekday. It's a weekday. The hustle doesn't stop for D'Angelo. The grind don't stop for D and his boys. Dangle, dangle all day.

I got to make fucking cash, money. Well, it didn't matter because with the Thanksgiving sandwich wise, you get a little side of hot gravy. Love that side of gravy. And you can pour it right on top of your sandwich there. I loved the Thanksgiving sandwich. Or you can do what you did and just do a shot of it. I did do a few shots.

Keep them coming. I love the Thanksgiving sandwiches. It's a good sandwich. It's a really great sandwich. That lobster roll both home runs for me. I like both of those a lot. I was going to say Thanksgiving sandwich is always a big win for me.

I love that. Especially homemade the day on Black Friday. But I also think that they do a particularly good version. Mitch's furrowing is brow. The day after Thanksgiving is referred to as Black Friday. Oh, OK. I didn't know what you were talking about. Do you still call the movie Friday, Black Friday?

Oh, with Chris Tucker. What are you supposed to call it? White Friday is pretty good too. White Friday is steel magnolia. Man, we got a lot of shit to do. Rigging elections. Oh, sorry, wrong crowd. All these people left their fucking boats at Fox Woods.

How many let's go brand designs did we pass? We did pass a few. And that's not why Nick was vomiting. Nick was very cool when he said, these country roads make me nauseous. Also, fucking pub corn over here is driving. Oh, my God. And my dude is shaky.

I was pointing out sights. Right over here. Right over here. Right over here. You want to stop at Queen's Seat? If anyone has to go to the bathroom, we can go to my mom's house. On the drive from... That is true.

I did offer that up. We fucked up every sidewalk in Groton, Connecticut. They all fucked up. If the cops come knocking, know that it was Michael Mitchell. It was a let's go brand and flag with a Ukraine flag. Yeah, we stand with a Ukraine flag. Got complicated family. That was the only thing that soothed Nick's stomach

when he saw the let's go branding. Projectile vomiting. Let's go branding. Oh, okay. A moment of rest. I'm home. What did you guys think of the cheeseburger sub? A cheeseburger sub?

Not that common on the West Coast. No. No. No, because subs... It's a cheeseburger. It's true. I didn't eat it like that, but... Oh, it's true.

No. No, and I won't stand for it. I really enjoyed that cheeseburger sub. It was good. It was really good. It was tasty. We got that with ketchup, mustard, lettuce, tomato, and onion. No ketchup, the savory fruit.

The more you eat, the more you chew. I'm 40, dude. I think I'm also drunk. You drank moonshine for real. I don't do that to you. I don't do that to you. I don't do that to you. Put a little hair on the chest.

I fucking hope so. Put a little dick on your nuts. Another little dick on my nuts? I already barely know how to use the little dick I have. Now I'm going to get served FX ads all week. Are you okay? What happened? I hit the mic on my tooth.

Just relax. My mom's here. I'm nervous. Talk about growing little dick. You're nervous around your mom? It feels like you're actually the most comfortable around your mom based on how much time a 40-year-old man lives there. We should have stopped by Quincy.

We took 90 down to fucking Fox Woods. This guy talked about 93 for the entire ride of the 90. We should have taken 93 down. We should have gone down 93. Him and Emma are like, 90 is fine. 93 goes south by Southwest. Me, Carl, and Nick in the car. It's like, just steer us into fucking traffic, please.

93. Look at the Boston gas. Oh, it's Ho Chi Minh and the paint. You can see that. I saw it. You can drive by South, the adorchester in my house, in my high school. It would have been fun.

As if every episode of Doe Boys isn't a tour of your fucking childhood. We have to actually drive through a tour of your childhood. I feel like I could draw Quincy from a map and I've never even fucking been there. Well, you're going to be there tomorrow. We're driving back up through 93. We're going through Quincy. Oh, I can't fucking wait.

I'm very excited. Oh, my God. I'm very excited. I'm a little spoiler for the next episode. I'm going to eat at that McDonald's he always talks about. The McDonald's across the street from North, the brutalist McDonald's. Yeah.

We'll be stopping. We're going to get a cheeseburger. I want cheeseburgers from North. We're not going to just get a cheeseburger. I know. No, no, no, no. I'm going to eat 100 nuggets. My McDonald's.

We're going to get my McDonald's order. What is your regular order? Regular order? Yeah. All right. If I'm going to McDonald's, I want the two cheeseburger meal like I used to get in 1995 as a child. And I've got to get six nuggets on top of that because that ain't enough.

Even though I usually don't eat but three nuggets. And then I see orange. I see orange. That's a great choice. Great choice. I like that. I also like a guy who orders nuggets knowing they'll be leftovers. We got to go to McDonald's together.

I work hard for my money. Okay. And McDonald's does it right. This is a flex, bro. This is a flex. Hey, let me get them nuggets. I ain't going to eat them though. You're getting Carl's car and he has a stack of nuggets in the ashtray.

Hold on. It was right there. Man, that's garbage. Put your cigarette out on each and every one of those nuggets. You have to smoke a cigarette and you get in my car. For people who don't listen to the show as much, which is my family who is here. God bless.

We did a McNugget power hour where we would try to eat them. That's correct. We would try to eat a McNugget every minute. And the only one to do it was Gabriel's. He ate 62. More than an hour, he ate two extra nuggets. I was accidentally eating them in between minutes early on. Early on, I was like forgetting.

Nuggets, they're truly addictive. It's just fucking, you know, when you're doing drugs and you're like, I'm not as high as I could be. I bet I could top this off with a little key bump, you know. I did that with nuggets and it hurt. I honestly, I'm not going to lie. I don't think I've digestively been the same since the nugget power. It was really bad.

I went and saw a movie after that and then I fucking like had like a, you know, my left arm hurt the whole time. I said during the contest that my dick hurt and it was true. Yeah. 62. Well, it's killing me. How many did you get? How many did you get?

I tapped out in the thirties, I believe. Damn. I did about 40. I was second place. I think Bayer did like thirties as well. Yeah. Yeah, it was fucked up. Honestly, I'm a king of a tiny kingdom.

It's a very cool story and I get to tell it all the time. I told it at the jewelry store yesterday. I went to a different jewelry store. Oh, he was at the other one. We also had the Greek wrap and the New England clam chowder. The Greek wrap was, first off, I was expecting a tortilla. It came in a pita. And this is Greek.

I'm just saying the screenshot on the website. Portrait. I asked for a Greek pita. Oh, you made a substitution. Yes. Okay, I was not privy to this. So it came in a pita. God, you fucking monster, Mitch.

You were mad about this? Not mad about it. I was just surprised. I was expecting a tortilla. That said, it did not have great structural integrity. You saw it kind of got soggy and completely fell apart. And I honestly just kind of felt like it was just... You were holding it like your hand is right now, basically.

You were doing this. And it just kind of... How are you supposed to hold it? Well, I mean, you could use two hands. Like a Greek person would. Yeah. Maybe it's just did a discus. Wow.

That was great for. It was visible swamp ass. It's not that bad. It's not that bad. Squish. It fell apart in your hands. Yeah. Your hands were covered in lettuce.

Yeah. It was... I don't know. I mean, I felt like this was honestly underwhelming. It's sort of been helped a lot by the presence of a protein. But I rather just gotten this in a salad versus this in a wrap. Which you can do. We ordered it in a pocket.

Sure, yeah. But the clam chowder, I thought, was not bad. That was pretty solid. Good broth. Good broth in the clam chowder. I love clam chowder specifically as a black pepper delivery vehicle. And getting rip open five packets of black pepper and hit it on there. Holy shit.

That's a black pepper delivery man. I love clam chowder. Carl used to drive from house to house walking in with the big pepper grinder. He's like, can I add pepper? $11. That black man is spicy. The terpenes in CBD are very similar to the terpenes in black pepper. How about that?

So if you're ever greening out and you're too high, fucking jam down a little black pepper and it'll help level you out. Jesus. Not to be the stoner uncle helping everybody here. But come by my basement. I'll show you the black pepper tricks. I love putting the black pepper on my steak and cheese. I just do my steak and cheese plain.

I got a large plain steak and cheese, salt and pepper. And you had some of it. I love that you say large. It's like, we already said we have 11 subs. You don't have to start throwing out sizes that most of them were larges. The large steak and cheese, they cook it on the flat top. Why? Because they cook that meat up on the flat top.

Love that flat top. And it makes a big difference. Oh, here we go. Well, that's part of why this place is like a cut above, you know, the subways and the Quiznos of the world is because they have more like prep stations. Like they have a flat top. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

That steak and cheese was really good. You forced me to eat it. I did. You were very angry. And actually, I have a new fetish and it's a Mitch force feeding Carl steak and cheese. So I didn't know about it at the time, but now I for sure have it. I was really enjoying my Thanksgiving sandwich and also taking bites of the lobster roll. And Mitch was like, eat that steak and cheese.

Eat that steak and cheese. I did actually did do this. Yes. Well, also you were on the phone call. And I think for the first time ever you were out on your phone call and I went, get in here. I did that. You're at work.

You're at work. This is not a vacation call. You're at work. Get your ass in here and eat this steak and cheese. You did. You did actually like bang on the glass. It's time to eat the sandwiches. I don't know.

Are you closing deals with your entertainment lawyer? Sorry, Lauren. I can't join the cast next season. Oh, too bad. I got to go in here and eat this fucking steak. Was it Mitch? Is it Doe Boys? Is that okay?

It is Doe Boys. You're right. It is Doe Boys. Understandable. This is better than SNL. Oh, yeah. Big win. Trust us.

Our show is funnier than SNL. Oh, fuck. I have to check it out. What did you think of that steak and cheese? Did you enjoy it? I love the steak and cheese. The steak and cheese is good. It's a damn good sandwich.

I will say the number nine, I think, is the steak and cheese, but with peppers, onions, and mushrooms. And again, I got it in a pocket and the structural integrity was off. But I can lean into a crumbling sandwich. I just have to eat it in a way that I don't want anyone to ever see. I'm so good at a sandwich. It's like, that burger is falling apart. And I just push it all the way into my mouth and swallow it like a fucking anaconda.

And everyone's like, you can see like a fucking sub-shaped fucking blump going down my neck. Can I ask a question? Yes. No. Connecticut. One of my favorite YouTubers is Dame Drops. He's from Connecticut here and they talk about the Connecticut chopped cheese. Is the steak and cheese from DeAngelo's the Connecticut chopped cheese?

Is that wrong? Boo if that's wrong. Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. I asked you to do it and yet it was still scary. Oh my God.

Geez, Louise, I'm trying to ask a question. Trying to get it not on your neck, but I accidentally got it in the mic. It's like a burger patty, right? It's like ground beef. That's what it is. Okay, in essence. Okay. I've only had it at Bronx, Bodega.

Yeah. Cheeseburgers full patties. They don't really care. It seems like they don't care about the chopped cheese either. They were very kind of lukewarm on it. Is it this hometown burger or some shit or no? No, they don't care. You don't care about it?

Oh, man. It's a Bronx thing for sure. That's where I first had it was Bronx, Bodega's. Okay. We get it now. We get it. We get it. The steak and cheese was good though.

It's very good. Stay in your seat. Yeah. Every time I get a steak and cheese, the meat has to be juicy. And this meat was juicy. It was juicy. It was good. The bread was soft.

They melt the American cheese in there. You want to talk about the bread? Quality bread. I enjoyed the bread. Did you do it? How much research on it? Was I supposed to do research on the bread specifically? Yes.

Well, you're the expert. Tell us about the D'Angelo bread. I don't know. Daniel knows it. Weigar, I'm noticing your hair in this moment. Yeah. It's feathering out at the bottom a little bit. In a way, I'm digging.

You have severe like grunge band basest vibes right now. And I think it works. Right? It's a little Nick Novicellic over here. Oh boy. For sure. Grunge music is from before you were born. Maybe Daniel will attach me.

But it comes from a specific bakery, all this bread in Massachusetts. Wow. Okay. Yes. And I don't know where it is. So I fucked up. Anyways, Weigar. But no one's coming here for actual info.

They just want to boo us for not ordering the thing they love. I thought the Yum Brands nugget was pretty good. I had some good, good research here. I'm starting to have the bread, the bakery pulled up. I'm not mad at you. I'm just saying I thought you would, I thought you would have seen that. I think people were enjoying the Columbine Facts. Columbine Facts.

You know that the death car was sold at auction and there's actually a Hollywood executive who drives Dylan Klebowl's car around. Yes, it's true. It's parked at the funnier dice. It'll be parked at my work. Yeah. What? I see Weigar sitting in it sometimes.

Just listening to Marilyn Manson. That's crazy. And for those of you who don't know, Funnier Dye Offices share a building with Oprah Winfrey Network. Yes. Yeah. Oh. A real good juxtaposition.

So let's get to our final thoughts, Mitch, on Papa Jean. Or I'm sorry. Not Papa Jeanos. Papa Jeanos corporate partner. I apologize. I misspoke. Throw things. Throw things.

Okay. Remember that you booed someone for misspeaking when you come up to talk to us in the casino later. I've had a handful of interactions with you guys. Wouldn't be fully confident you're going to nail a sentence. Okay. So before you come for Nick, remember that later on you're going to try to talk to us when you misspeak briefly, when you're like, hello, my name is Ryan and I am a big fan

of your podcast. I practiced this line before I walked over to you at the roulette table. When you do that, I'll boo your ass if you fucking slip up. Also, it's okay to talk to me too. I've been getting a lot of people who have been looking at me like I'm fucking chopped liver out here. I'm nice too. I'm on TV.

Someone, someone, someone asked, someone asked Weigher if he could talk to you. He's like, can I talk to Carl? And Weigher's like, I think you should ask him. Yeah. Last night someone said to Weigher, can I take a picture with Gabriel? And Weigher goes, I feel like it's up to him. Also, while we were eating, someone took a selfie with us through the D'Angelo window. That's right.

Make some noise while you add folks. Okay. While while we're putting them on blast for that, we watched you with your trunk open, shut your drivers and passenger and back doors like 40 times. Clearly your door, a jar light was on and you were like, I don't know what it is. Everyone's opening the close of the doors and your fucking trunk is wide open. You dumb fuck. Escorted.

I'm not petty at all. Why do I remember that? Security, get his ass out of here. Security's tough, man. They don't let you sneak red wine into the audience for your family. They play hard here, dude. Oh shit, lights are on. Final thoughts.

Yes. Well, the ladies who are the significant others of men who are fans of this podcast make some noise. God bless you. All of you are too attractive for those guys. Everyone who just shared needs to join a support group where the over the two and a half hours every Thursday when your husband or partners are all listening to this, you guys get together and like solve world problems.

Well, everyone's like, did you hear the drop? It mentioned come today. Weig's. Yes. I don't feel right that Emma lost 500 bucks. Yeah. I have another $100 in my pocket. Jesus Christ.

Wow. This is also Doughboy's money. I got 600 out. Emma, go put it on black or red. Your choice this time. Wow. Emma's going to decide what to do with this. Emma, your body, your choice.

You get to choose where to bet. She can't do it. She has to do the show. Yeah, she's got a job to do. She's like, you also are going to make me bring you out something later. I don't want to spoil it. Donuts. Emma, just keep that $100.

It's fine. Anyway, so let's say you don't have to gamble it. None of you have to gamble, but you can. Anyway, the bread is still good. I just took a bite right now. The bread is good. I'll tell you what, it's working as a coosie. It is working.

Gabris is using it around his beer bottle. I want to call it a carbsie. I wish you looked into the bread, like I said. It's really fantastic bread. I'll look it up here, Mitch. Here's what we're going to do. We're going to do our final thoughts on D'Angelo. I want you to go first because this is your childhood fave.

You can get a baseline and we're going to see just exactly how high a fork score this thing is going to get. Yeah, I wonder what Mitch is going to give it. Let's start with Mitch. Okay, so beforehand, I was afraid to go all five because I thought you guys would make fun of me. But we had a really great experience. When I was younger, I told you about this.

On the East Coast, there's a lot of sub shops. Like you're saying, you can go to anyone. D'Angelo is always a stand by, a chain that had good steak and cheese. You could get a good meatball back in there. Thanksgiving sandwich is great. I used to get the Greek pocket with my mom. There's a lot of memories attached to it. There was a vision center next door,

which was an optometrist or maybe an eye wear place. A place for people with glasses in some way. Sure. A place for androids that love witches. And look, it was right next to my high school. Which high school is that? North Quincy High School. North Quincy High School, what's the new mascot called?

The red patriot? What was the old mascot? Oh, it's still Yaku. He was, let's just say, a chief wild style mascot. Yeah, he maybe yes was. And now they dressed him up as a patriot now, so he's fine. They took the Native American mascot and put the patriot shit on him?

Yes. That is entirely too symbolic. He's not holding a Tom Hawk anymore. He is holding, I think, like a bill. Great. It's not problematic anymore, it's perfect. It's so fucked up. It's so funny.

We used to go there after school wigs. I remember one time, Mom, I'm sorry, I skipped school. And she was mad at you now for that. Oh, she will be. I will be in trouble after the show. I skipped school and I went to DeAngelo's and I went into the bathroom and the toilet wasn't working. Oh, boy.

And then I got caught and I got sent to the dean's office and he said, what were you doing? I said, my stomach hurt and I had to use the bathroom so I went to DeAngelo's. And I said, the toilet's broken and the proof is in there if you want to go look. And he said, OK, let's go look. But he was joking and then he started laughing at me

and said, you're good to go. And he let me go. Were you calling his bluff? Was it an empty bowl? No, it was. It was in there. You shit in there and wouldn't flush. Wow.

That's like a stack of nightmares that people will have. They just shut down the DeAngelo's. It's a super fun site now. They buried it in cement. It's a little Chernobyl like. Look, I like it. I'm a homer. What do you want from me?

You know I'm a homer. I'm a Patriots fucking sweatshirt. Oh, those are called sweatshirts, which you have on. It's the Belichick short sleeve sweatshirt. Yes, yes. Yeah. Technically, all shirts on us are sweatshirts. Every shirt contains sweat.

It's a nice sweatshirt. You can wear it to a live show, a casino. It's really nice. You can send your engineer to go buy it. She can come back, pick up pants for you, show you how to tie your shoes. I wanted to be a homer, but DeAngelo's proved itself and it's five forks.

Five forks. Wow. And a spoon man. Wow. It was. All right, Gabriel, your thoughts, your fork score. Look, DeAngelo, I don't pluralize it. I pay the honor, was a delight.

And I think the chain sandwich shop is the territory to be trying to win these days. Sure. Very few, like if the two big winners are Subway and Quiznos and Papa John's, Jimmy John's. Like if those are your Papa John's, if those are your three things, like that's a fucking category to try to win.

And I believe. Did you hear that lady say, yeah, when you said that? Yeah. She's crying. This guy's a fucking poet. Like contact for Doughboyz. Should have sent a poet. Yeah, contact reference should go over well with 30 year olds.

The, I think like the sandwich chain is a category to fucking win. And if DeAngelo was anywhere in the Southern California area, I would make treks to it. Cause it is like, it's, if I lived, if I was back home on Long Island, I might not drive to DeAngelo to get subs. Sure.

Cause I have access to subs, but fuck, man, it was, if I'm on a road trip and I see a DeAngelo, I'm going to be the guy from the backseat. I'm never driving, going, we should pull over and get DeAngelo to, you know, this, that. I'll know a lot. The hot pocket, the number nine. I got to say, if we're going by, you rate it by it's,

does it do what it's telling you it's going to do? I'm going to have to go with four and a half. Four and a half forks. Very good score. We had a good, we had a really good experience. Top to bottom. My aquafina was freezing cold and just salty enough to make me think I should just drink tap water.

Four and a half forks. Carl Tartt, your thoughts. So I went for the Thanksgiving toasted. I chose to get it without mayonnaise because I've already told y'all what mayonnaise does on the sandwich and I don't think it belongs on that one. Forgive me if that's disrespectful to your region. But I royally, thoroughly enjoyed my sandwich.

I royally enjoyed it too. He had a little crown on him, he was going to him. He was going to him, yeah. Oh dear. Thanksgiving toasted. Stans mayo. So I thoroughly and royally enjoyed it. And the sandwich was long.

Nice. Turkey. Hot. Stuffing. And I don't call it stuffing. I call it dressing. I know y'all have never heard that word up here. Damn Yankees.

Southern thing. The dressing on the sandwich was good. Cranberry sauce. Great. Hell yeah. I got extra. I had to put extra on the sandwich, it was a little dry. I should have got mayo.

But you know how I feel about that. You know how I feel about mayonnaise on the sandwich. Mayonnaise, mayonnaise just don't belong with that. No. I don't believe in that mixin. Mayo and Cran mixin. It just ain't right. Looks like half the loads I blow.

Jesus Christ. Oh my God. Good God. Jesus everybody, thank you so much for coming. The exits are that way. Mom, that one was for you. Mom, you're a nurse. Let me know if that's a problem.

That is disgusting. Your mom is here. That's the nicest thing I've said in front of her all day. That's all that sandwich needed. I put salt and pepper on it. All that sandwich needed was those three. The cranberry sauce, turkey and dressing that I got on the sandwich. And dipping it in the gravy with the extra cranberry sauce.

The bread was fantastic. It was good. Hell yeah. It was the right temperature. And sharing it amongst the other sandwiches that I was being force fed. Phone ringing off the hook. Phone ran off the hook. ABC studio heads.

I'm answering the phone going, got it. And then throwing it down. Oh, I'm getting another chain. Correct. Oh, another chain. Is the lady from the jewelry store, has she made it? Yeah, the show is almost over. Please make some noise if you've made it.

I thought we had a good thing going. She's a 65 year old married woman with blue hair. Sounds like March. Between that and all that. My favorite sandwich. Sounded like March. March would be like 80 now. That's crazy.

How would she? She'd be old as hell. Not 80. March is fine. They were like 35. That's a Doughboy's couple. March is pretty hot. Homer's kind of slobby.

That's true. I think Homer sends March over when they see the Doughboy's eating. My husband likes your show. I'm giving her a Kermit voice because I can't do any impressions. Jabba and Leia are kind of a Doughboy's couple. Leia and Salacious. My neighbor to Toro. As a southerner in the west coaster,

we have limited sandwich options, Firehouse and Jersey Mike's. My brother Michael's subs. Being the only option that we have, Jersey Mike's is leading number one for me. This D'Angelo's was just as good, if not better than Jersey Mike's. I'm going to give it 4.894.

Holy shit. Take it to the 100th decimal place. Holy shit. There's flies gathering around Gaberson Eye. I guess using bread as a moisturizer is not ideal. Two things. My head is spinning, trying to think of this hypothetical 100-pronged fork

with 89 that are active. Oh, God. Secondly, I just can't stop thinking about that fucking loads comment. Jesus Christ. Pianta dosi. I'm saying it wrong probably. The bakeries in Maldon. He said he was putting 500 on red.

Dano. Also, this crowd looks like an AA meeting, is what Dano said. Dano, funnier than all of us. Thank you, Dano. Possibly is. I'll keep this brief. I'll say this first of all,

we're doing two more shows tomorrow night in Boston. It was coming to the Boston shows. A little convoys on route. Can't get your money back after this one. Yeah, sorry. And you're going to be there? Yeah. We're going to make sure we got some for you.

Shut up the metal detectors at the Wilbur now. So, I have not a guarantee but a prediction. We've been doing these live shows lately. And so far, every chain we've visited has gotten into the Golden Play Club. In this most recent leg of the tour. We went to Nashville. We went to Phoenix.

Gabriel was with us in Phoenix. We went to Portland. A little spoiler for next week's episode. And we're doing three shows in the New England area. I think that streak is going to be broken this weekend. One of these chains is not getting into the Golden Play Club. Sure. Will it be D'Angelo?

Better fucking not be. D'Angelo, no. Four and a half, four. Welcome to the Golden Play Club. Wow. Outstanding work. It's very good. It's much better than I expected.

It's really, really good. It's really good. What's the average of 4.5, 4.5, 5 and 4.89? He'll get this in two seconds. Watch this, watch this. You know it's actually great at math. It's 16.72. Who's great at math, him?

No, you. I am not bad at math. You're pretty damn good at math. I'm pretty good at mental math, not like anything else. Yeah. So let's talk this out. 4.5, 4.5, 5 is 14 plus 4.89 is 18.89 divided by 4 is 4 remainder 28. So it's 7.

It's 4.7 some. Wow. Pretty good score. Emma said yes. What is it, Emma? It's 4.72. Wow. 4.72.

I was fucking right. Yes. Use your neurodivergence for good. 4 beers, a shot of moonshine and an untold amount of cannabis. Deep. And you just... You dehydrated, kids. Just added all that up like Rain Man.

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Hey, that was our review of D'Angelo, not Papa Gina's. Congratulations to D'Angelo. You're in the Golden Blight Club and it's time for a segment. Mitch, we've got a ring-shaped food stuff. We're going to decide if you should put it in your mouth. Yeah. It's snack or whack, doughnut or don't-ut edition. Oh.

What's happening? Wow. What's happening? What's happening? Got him. Just a doughnut hole, living with a cinnamon roll hole. She took the midnight snack, doughing anywhere. Just a Boston cream, baked it at Krispy Kreme.

He took the midnight snack, doughing anywhere. What is he doing? Wow. A fat guy with a chocolate raced. The smell of fried in double glazed. Bakers does as they can share the box. It goes nom and nom and nom and nom. Strangers eating up and down the doughnut box.

Old old fashion sprinkles for a bite. Eat bites, sweet holes. Brewing Joe to dunk a doughnut snack in somewhere for a bite. And since my mom and family are here, let me make the lyrics clear. We're only talking about doughnuts and nothing else. So which one of these will make us come? Apple fritter take a crumb or the millet never ends. It goes nom and nom and nom and nom.

Strangers eating up and down the doughnut box. Old fashioned sprinkles for a bite. Eat bites, sweet holes. Brewing Joe to dunk a doughnut snack in somewhere for a bite. Wow. The crowd looks concerned. Doughnuts for doughnuts. So good that it makes you nut.

Eat bites, sweet holes. Doughnuts for doughnuts. So good. Eat bites, sweet holes. Doughnuts for doughnuts. So good that it makes you nut. Eat bites, sweet holes. Doughnuts for doughnuts.

Okay. Wow. A standing hoe. A standing dough. Standing doughvation. Wow. Wow. April 20th, 1999. I've never been to karaoke before.

Show's not over. We have more. Which is Emma has brought us a bunch of doughnuts to taste. These are from Duncan. Now Mitch, what are we going to be tasting here? We got ourselves a variety from a local Dunkin' Donuts branch. You were in the drive-thru with me. Okay, we have...

This did not need to be a fight. Yet it was. And it is again. This is a cornbread doughnut. That is what we have to do. We also have Boston creams, chocolate frosted, and a strawberry doughnut.

There is also a chocolate doughnut. We don't have to judge those. We are only doing four. We are only eating four doughnuts. Okay. The crux of the argument was that we needed one for the segment. And Mitch, we got about eight. Oh, you just had one?

We got one taste test, and then we could give the rest out to the audience and say, hey, what do you guys think of this particular doughnut? Here's another 11 doughnuts for the 200 people that came to see us. Oh, that's why you were mad. I wasn't even mad. I was just trying to explain myself, and you got flustered. It's fine, this will work out.

We'll have a few doughnuts. We'll distribute the remainders. Just pass some of these bad boys around. We always over-tip and tip well. At Dunkin' Donuts, the woman walked away after Mitch paid, and he's like, hey, hey, like banging on the glass, and you see her like, this motherfucker's coming in here to eat all the doughnuts.

And she comes back, and she's all timid, like, sir, where? And she opens it, and he hands her like a tip, a cashier. She's like, oh, shit, that's, thank you so much. Good tip, too. And then he goes, let me see them titties. She fucking turned me down. I plan to suck a tittie in every city. Jesus Christ. Hey, Mitch, Mitch, allow me to hit your goals.

I got some bee cups over here, brother. Pretty hairless, if you like tan. Something tells me you have Quincy, Massachusetts, covered. I can't do that on stage. No, come on, save it for offstage in our room. Our room. All right, let's distribute some of these doughnuts. It's to us, though, right?

Yeah, we'll just have a few of these. Just have some bites. It's fine. So, Mitch, did you not want a piece of the cornbread one, the one that the whole bit's based on? No, I got one, and here it is. Oh, that's the cornbread one. Yeah, I think that one's it. See, here's what I'll say about Dunkin' Donuts.

And I think this is, honestly, a sentiment shared by a lot of people who are Dunkin' fans. And I count myself as a Dunkin' fan. The doughnuts are the weak point. The doughnuts are the, you know, like, that's not the reason to go to Dunkin' Donuts. They almost like they've evolved past doughnuts at this point. Yeah, I love a croissant which and a nice coffee from there.

But so many of these are, like, they're made at, like, a factory, right? They're made at, like, one joint bakery and then shipped out in plastic to the location, so you're not getting the fresh in-house doughnuts. Necessarily, yes. I don't know if you're agreeing with me or disagreeing with me. So the ones we have in LA are not made fresh? I don't believe so.

I mean, certainly, some of them are, like, kind of like, you know, cell phone store size. They're like little small little kiosk stores. You're spinning on Fred the Donut Man's grave right now by saying this shit. I don't know if that is true, I guess. There's some that do make them in-house, I think. In LA?

In Los Angeles? Some of them do. I think so. I mean, I don't go anywhere. I'm a Krispy Kreme guy myself. What'd you say? Wow. We should have went to the other casino,

the one that we didn't book us to do the show at. Solid advice. You just got burnt. That sucks. All right. Talk us through what we're eating here. Tell us your thoughts as you're consuming these. I'm going to distribute some of these,

starting with the rifleman has disappeared, so I'm very anxious. That's for the best. He's up in the top now. Okay, great. There seems to be one woman literally shaking. Oh, why don't we hook her up? Possibly.

No, she's not shaking. She's shaking. Are you okay? I have low blood sugar. Can I have a dozen donuts real quick? My A1C is plummeting. All right. I just had a bite.

Yeah, just give them out. Wait, I'm sorry. Did you think you were going to take nine donuts to the dome in your seat? And do you want me to share these? Yeah, did you go to elementary school? I would honestly like to see that miss. I honestly would pay a lot of money.

I would pay a lot of money to see you eat all the rest of the stuff. Ma'am, if you want to mind just like walking back to the back rows there. Just, yeah, just spread them out throughout the place. There's going to be about nine Quincy guys in flannels ready to fucking jump you for a couple of Boston creams. I just ate.

That's speaking of Boston cream. That was the first one that I just ate. I tried the Boston cream first because that's the only respect you're going to get from me this fucking weekend. No one wants them. It's the only time Boston comes first in my book. And now I can't eat a cornbread donut without no milk. How are you coming back on stage?

No one wants to get... Everyone's doctor has said, please stop eating donuts at live shows. This is a Doughboys audience. All these people hope to get back out of their chairs when the show runs. There's no guarantee. All right.

I'll say you were talking on that cornbread. You do need milk or coffee or water. That shit is... My shit is thick. It's resign. Yeah, donut got ass. It's very dry. And I don't know what's going on in this room.

It's also got ass. And got ass is negative? No. I mean, it's thick. The donut is thick. And you choose if that's positive or negative. Yeah. I mean...

I choose positive. I mean, I still need some milk. The innuendo is deep here now. Okay. I'm a chocolate frosted man. That's my favorite donut. That's how you identify. That's on your driver's license.

All right. Six foot two, 299 pound chocolate frosted man. That's right. Never hit 300. Never seen it on the scale. Yeah. Never seen it on the scale. It's a little different than never hitting it, pal.

You can't see a scale either without two mirrors. You can't be 300 if you don't look down at the number. You're fine. We got to get to some audience questions. Just like a restaurant value feedback. We'll get to our verdicts as we're doing this, but let's go ahead and get some questioners up here so we can keep things moving.

Emma, who are we bringing up? I got Peter WG, Kevin N, and Andrew V. Wow. Three men. Emma, you're just going to take questions right there. That's good. Maybe they're asking questions for their partner. Definitely.

Maybe it's a flip. Life is wondering, what the fuck are you guys talking about? Here's my thought on the Duncan. I like them to varying degrees, but the baked good I'd like the most on this table is this D'Angelo bread. It's just on another level. I'll take a half a loaf of unbuttered D'Angelo bread

over a Duncan donut right now. But I'm not a sweet guy. I'm a savory guy. Everyone says I'm not a sweet guy. Like ketchup. Oh, boy. All right. Let's get any other thoughts on the donuts

before we get some questions? Five forks. Five forks. That strawberry one is always good. They were a little dry. They tasted a little stale. The busted cream is a hit. I mean, if you buy donuts at 4 p.m.

and eat them at 8 p.m., they're not going to be. No, it's true. Sadly, it's a don't nut, I think. You think it's a don't nut? Uh-oh. Well, I got bad news. Sorry. I didn't know we weren't nutting.

All right. What's our first question? This is Peter. Hi, Peter. Hey, everybody. So my question is, if you were vegan, but one time a year you could break your veganism for any fast food meal, what would it be and why?

This is a great question. Great question. I honestly think my answer would either be an in-and-out burger or Popeye's fried chicken or honestly, wings stop depending on what I'm, if I'm craving wings or fried chicken. But like the thing that, after having a whole year where I didn't eat any meat at all and no fish,

the thing that the fast food that I like the most is wings and fried chicken. That's what I miss the most. It's like the most satisfying. I can only go to one spot, like you can't go, that can't go to like a... No, you have one meal, you have one spot. Shit.

And it's fast food too. Yeah, mine would be whatever the rule, however many cheesy gordita crunches, the rule allows. That's great. I was gonna say Taco Bell as well. I would go nuts at Taco Bell for that. Yeah, if I took a year off eating meat and cheese,

I think Taco Bell would be a great place to dive back into both. Boy, I didn't think about the cheese element. That actually does complicate it. But you can like make Taco Bell pretty good with the vegan options. Veggie, yeah, and vegan too, yeah. I would go big mac meal.

I do a big mac meal. Pretty good answer. Can't go wrong. The lights came up. I saw my family and my Quincy friends. This sucks. Look, they're all right here. It's great.

And sorry. Sorry. We're sorry. All right, next question. Carl, is yours Taco Bell as well? Oh, I'm sorry, Carl. No, no, Taco Bell is mine. Yeah.

Cool. Hey, guys. Hi. My name's Andrew. Hi, Andrew. Hi, Andrew. My dad's here. It's his birthday.

Oh, shit. Happy birthday, Andrew's dad. He doesn't listen to the show. No, what do you do? Why did you do that? Wait, you're supposed to get him a gift he likes for his birthday. My wife was supposed to come,

but she couldn't come, so I brought him. All right. Does your wife listen? My wife is too fine. My wife listens. She can't come. I'm too hot. My question is, it's your birthday.

You can have any cake you want. What's your birthday cake preference? Oh, shit. Any cake. I can lead this off because this last birthday, my 40th birthday, my lovely wife, Tiffany, got a friend of hers who is a cannabis chef to make me one of my favorite desserts is banana pudding.

Wow, wow. And she made me an infused banana pudding cake that was like 80 milligrams. That shit lived on the coffee table for a full weekend, no cover on it, and a fork stuck in it, and I would just walk by all day long eating it until my feet swole up enough

that I had to cut my sandals off. But holy shit was that fucking cake, awesome. Wow. So banana pudding cake. I don't know if it's a thing in your category. Ask your dad, but I'm in. My foot inflated. I got this just last week.

I have cellulitis. I went to the doctor. My toe was swelling up. I'm on antibiotics right now. I take six antibiotics a day. Jesus. I just started high blood pressure meds, killing me. I'm doing okay.

Lucky bastard. January 5th, 1996, my seventh birthday, my grandma got a cake from a local grocery store we had in our hometown called Food World. That bakery at Food World was a beast. So my ideal birthday cake, because I'm not a big chocolate guy, ironically. See, but then how come you're in my phone

as big chocolate guy? That's your contact name. That's how I send out my iPhone contact. And just a white cake with buttercream frosting. Easy, easy, okay. White cake. A white devilish cake. With a thin blue line across the top.

Blue frosting. All right. I said, no, just this simple ass grocery store, like white sheet cake, but like it was like two layers. Buttercream frosting on it. When they started doing that whipped cream shit when I was in like middle school, I was like, let me get this shit out of here.

I want buttercream. I want to eat that red rose off the cake and start twitching. That's when you're a kid, that sugar flower hits like requiem for a dream. So nasty. It was not a good taste. It felt like you were like drinking fucking IV water.

But it was something about it was like your teeth turned red. You eating that fucking red ass. And then maybe, and because I'm a classy adult now, there's Adelaide strawberries in the middle. Oh, that's fine. Yeah. So we'll do that. January 6th, 2021.

Me and Mitch. I want to get myself a celebration cake. We all know there's way too many steps at the Capitol for you to innovate it. Go get them, boys. I'm gonna drive the getaway car. I'll overturn the election when they put an escalator in. At the Nathan's hot dog down on the Capitol floor.

Wasn't there a cart there? Wasn't there Nathan's cart? Wasn't there? Hey, man, you still got to make your money. This day is crazy. I'm making money hand over fist. These fucking chin beards love hot dogs. What's going on?

Something. Hey, what's that podcast y'all are listening to? Where's it going? Don't boy you. January 6th, 2021. If I was eating a cake that day. My birthday is forever tainted. Wow, Capitol Eve is your birthday.

Yeah, Capitol Eve. I'm so excited. January 6th is tomorrow. And I invited them all to the club the night before. Yellow cake with chocolate frosting. Like the Betty Crocker. Vanilla ice cream? Hell yeah.

That shit wins. Or a hoodsy as we call it. Hoodsy cup. Hoodsy. What? Hoodsy cup. They're real. All right, enough of this.

They're real. They're real. Give me back on that fucking plane. I got to go home. We're going to have a great time in Boston, I promise. Yellow cake, chocolate frosting. Great answer. A lot of great answers up here.

I love birthday, the birthday flavor. And so I just want a birthday cake for my birthday. Give me the classic birthday cake. You know what I'm talking about? What do you consider birthday cake? Vanilla cake, vanilla frosting, and rainbow sprinkles. Just give me a standard birthday cake. Buttercream, though?

Not that way. Where do you land on funfetti? I love a funfetti. That's sort of like the birthday cake infusion, right? It takes the birthday cake and puts it into the cake. That's great. That's a blast. I just want something that says birthday.

And so like, yeah, if something that qualifies as birthday flavor. I was just saying, that's the most Nick Weiger thing ever that is birthday cake has 42 candles on and it just says birthday. Period. All lowercase. Have any of the New Yorkers here been to Milk Bar? Oh yeah, Milk Bar. That birthday cake.

It's good. That shit is fucking good. It's boozy, but it's good. I am scared that the guy who almost tried to tackle us like Chappelle is gone. Where did he go? It's for the best. Security is out there breaking his fucking arm. You're seeing us through a scope right now.

One more question with the Doughboy shirt. Hi. Hi, Kevin. Hi, Kevin. This past week was teacher appreciation week. Wow. Question. Shout out to the teachers.

My question. If you four were principals, what are you buying your staff for lunch in order to show your appreciation? Oh. Because our staff got us pizza and expired COVID tests. So that was about it. Okay. Thanks, guys.

I would, my sister-in-law is a teacher, my brother is a principal. And if I was a principal for my teachers, I'd go, I know you guys are used to working with a six-foot-two hero, but I thought I'd like to hook you guys up with a six-foot hero. Half Italian, half American, like me, baby. And put out a six-foot sub. I don't even know if that's a thing for a lot of people, but I know here on the East Coast, a six-foot sub at a party is a fucking win-win. And if I have my druthers, it's from my hero on Jerusalem Avenue.

Yes. That's real good. Pizza's a crowd-pleaser. I think that's a good answer. I would offer for any of the teachers who are working a second job as a bartender or a waiter because pay is embarrassing for teachers in this country, I would maybe try to cover their shift or something. I don't know.

You would try to be every teacher for the day? Try to be every teacher for the day. Order from Applebee's. Order from one of the teacher's restaurants so they get the tip at least. Yeah, there you go. It's going to be like Benny Hill you chasing the kids in and out of the class. Principal Weiger, this teacher is a male prostitute. You have to cover the shift.

You say it. Mr. Weiger, it's the next day and he's been fired because you lay that pipe. They're deceased. Yeah. There's a fried chicken spot that has a bunch of locations across the country called Gus's. Oh, Gus's is very good. I'm not going to just get them pizza. Pizza is too easy.

I don't feel like there's no real mental effort in pizza. No, it's not. That's my answer. Pizza. Pizza. No, it's good. But it feels like it's the easiest option. Sure.

You're getting catered, Gus's. Hell, you get to pick your pieces, sides, baked beans, potato salad, mac and cheese. Their beans are fire and that fried chicken is awesome. Yeah. If you guys are ever in Nashville or New York or Los Angeles or whatever, check out Gus's. That's great. Great answer. There's an element of like being an adult with an adult constitution and thinking back

on my high school years and just like, okay, if my teacher had a very heavy meal, like was there ever a point where like my trigonometry teacher was like holding in diarrhea because they ate something so heavy for lunch. So part of me wants to say like, I'm going to get you a fucking boring ass sweet green or you just get to have something healthy and nutritious that isn't going to make you feel like shit for the remainder of your day. Jesus, I would be so mad. I would fail all those kids.

I've been holding in diarrhea this whole show. Where's my fucking appreciation week, Kevin? Kevin! Wigs. Yes. I would say I'm taking you out. We're not bringing the food back here. I'm going to take you out.

Ooh. I'm going to take you to a steakhouse. A steakhouse? A steakhouse. Leave the kids at the school. They'll be fine. You can get anything you want. You don't have to be at the school.

That's the way to do it. My mom is a retired teacher. My sister's a principal. Woo! A bunch of people in the audience I know here are teachers. There's a ton of teachers. God bless you. Thank you for your service.

Thank you so much for taking a pay cut to make sure our children are still like able to handle life going forward. Yes. True. And thank you for getting crayons on your fucking summer lifeguarding money and shit for your kids. You guys rule. We love teachers.

We all have bumper stickers on the back of our cars with a thin chalk line. That's our show. John Gabriel. Carl Tartt. Emma Namilia. Thanks to everyone here at Fox Woods. Thank you. And next time for the Spoonman, Mike Mitchell and Mike McGuire.

Happy eating. Thank you. Thank you, Fox Woods. Alright. The flat boys are back, and you know they could never be right. The flat boys are back. Do you like to just head for it? Want more dough boys?

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